This Week

Events

39 NORTH MARKETPLACE: The street fair

showcases the best in art and crafts and highlights produce, health and wellness and specialty food vendors. The event also features cooking demos, food/ health tutorials and the Kids Connect Zone. Th, 4-9pm through 7/30; Th, 4-9pm through 8/20. Opens 8/13. Free. Victorian

Square, 14th Street and Pyramid Way along Victorian Ave., Sparks, www.39northdowntown.com.

ART & NATURE AT THE ARBORETUM:

Experience the creative process at work while you meander through the gardens observing and speaking with artists. Painters, weavers, poetry readings, live acoustic musicians, artist-led somatic movement and more. Su, 7/26, 9am-noon. Free. Wilbur D.

May Arboretum and Botanical Garden,

Rancho San Rafael Regional Park, 1595

N. Sierra St, 785-4153, www.may arboretumsociety.org/events.html. ARTOWN: The 19th annual arts festival offers more than 500 events ranging from live music, dance, theater and performances to visual arts, workshops, multicultural events, fashion shows and tours. Artown events take place in various locations throughout Reno and

Sparks, but the festival’s main locations are Wingfield Park in downtown

Reno and Bartley Ranch Amphitheater in South Reno. M-Su through 7/31. Free for most events. Call or visit website for details. Locations vary. 322-1538, www.renoisartown.com.

CARRINGTON COLLEGE OPEN HOUSE:

Carrington College’s open house event is for anyone interested in health care career opportunities. Attendees can take campus tours, see classroom training and labs firsthand, and set up a time to observe a class. Tu, 7/28, 11am-7pm.

Free. Carrington College Reno Campus, 5580 Kietzke Lane, (855) 227-3037, http://carrington.edu/info/openhouse/ carrington-college. COMPRESSION! ART & FIRE: The Burning

Man festival comes to downtown Reno during the eighth annual celebration in conjunction with the Artown festival. The family-friendly event showcases fire arts including fire dance and flame effects sculptures, youth and alternative performance troupes, art cars, vendors and interactive workshops. Sa, 7/25, 3-10pm. Free. Downtown Reno ReTRAC Plaza, Commercial Row and Virginia St. downtown between Whitney Peak Hotel and Eldorado Casino Resort; (775) 334-4636; www.controlledburnreno.com.

EVENINGS ON THE RANCH: The series con-

cludes with “Tuned Up and Twisted

Cowboy Poetry” with Tony Argent.

Bartley’s historic ranch buildings will be open for display at 6 p.m., followed by the program at 7 p.m. A $3 donation per person is encouraged. W, 7pm through 7/29. Free or $3 suggested donation.

Western Heritage Interpretive Center,

Bartley Ranch Regional Park, 6000

Bartley Ranch Road, 828-6612; www.washoecounty.us. FEED THE CAMEL: The family-friendly food truck event features mobile food purveyors, libations and arts. W, 5-8pm through 9/30. McKinley Arts & Culture

Center, 925 Riverside Drive, 450-0062, https://www.facebook.com/pages/Feed-

The-Camel/256832417824677?fref=ts.

GREATER RENO STAMP & COVER SHOW: The

Nevada Stamp Study Society celebrates its 40th anniversary with a special souvenir envelope. There will be 13 stamp dealers plus the U.S. Postal Service at the show. Up to 60 frames (16 pages each frame) will be exhibited with judging and awards. The stamp dealers will provide appraisals and buy stamp collections. There will be hourly door prizes on both days. Sa, 7/25, 10am-6pm; Su, 7/26, 10am-

ROAD TO NOWHERE

Nowhere Nevada Movie aNd SouNdtrack releaSe

The locally created and produced awardwinning movie Nowhere Nevada will be screened at multiple venues across Reno as part of Artown. The film’s script was written by the late Marianne Psota, a well-regarded promoter of the local and regional music scene during the 1990s and early 2000s. The movie was put together several years after her death in 2004 with help from her fiance Nick Ramirez and supporters. The movie and soundtrack features contributions from local actors, musicians and artists including Ramirez, Jef Derderian, Elizabeth Cole, Mary Bennett, Max Volume, Tom Plunkett, Andy Luna, Stephen Patterson, Scott Dundas and others. The four-day event kicks off on Thursday, July 23, with a free concert featuring soundtrack bands including The Atomiks, The Liver Scars, The Walk of Shame, The Shames, Source, Stacey Tolle of GunShot Licker, Max Volume, Los Pistoleros and Nick Ramirez of Phat Couch. The show runs from 7 p.m. to 2 a.m. at Jub Jub’s Thirst Parlor, 71 S. Wells Ave. The film—“an unflinching love story wrapped around the underground music/drug scene in Northern Nevada”—will have its public red carpet premiere on Friday, July 24, at the Masonic Lodge/Freemason Theater, 40 W. First St. The event includes a catered cocktail reception with free “rock and roll” bowling at The Shelter, 111 N. Virginia St., and live entertainment and product signings from cast and crew members. There will be 15 local showings of the movie between Friday, July 24, and Sunday, July 26, at Good Luck Macbeth Theatre Company, 713 S. Virginia St., The Masonic Lodge/Freemason Theater and the Wells Fargo Theater at the University of Nevada, Reno, 1664 N. Virginia St. Tickets range from $5 artist pricing to $20 red carpet pricing. Visit www.nowherenevada.com for details. —Kelley Lang

N. Center St., (775) 246-4769, www.renostamp.org. LAKE TAHOE SHAKESPEARE FESTIVAL: The

43rd annual festival features two mainstage productions, Shakespeare’s romantic tragedy, Romeo and Juliet, and the world’s longest-running musical,

The Fantasticks. The productions will be performed in rotating repertory by a single company of actors through Aug. 23, Tuesday through Sunday, at 7:30pm.

Monday Night Showcase performances will run through Aug. 17 and Summer

Encore Showcase performances will run from Aug. 27–Sept. 12. M-Su through 9/12. $15-$672. Sand Harbor State Park, 2005

Hwy. 28, Incline Village, (800) 747-4697; http://laketahoeshakespeare.com. LAKE TAHOE: STATE OF THE LAKE LECTURE:

Geoff Schladow gives a presentation on the most important factors that affected the health of Lake Tahoe last year. Learn about the most pressing issues for this year, and the new programs designed to address them. Refreshments and no-host bar 5:30pm., presentation begins at 6pm. Th, 7/23, 5:30-7pm. $5 suggested donation. Tahoe Center for Environmental Sciences, 291 Country Club Drive, Sierra Nevada College Campus, Incline Village; (775) 881-7560 ext. 7483; http://terc.ucdavis.edu/events. NEVADA FAIR: The four-day event showcases Nevada’s agriculture, mining and culture. Highlights include a 4H/

FFA livestock show with an auction and small animal show, dairy cow and dairy goat show, horse show, sewing, baking and crafts, truck pulls, circus acts, live bands and a carnival, among other events and attractions. Presale carnival passes are on sale at the Carson City

Visitors and Convention Bureau for $20. The coupons are redeemed at the carnival for a wristband that allows you to ride all day on the day you choose to use it. Presales end on July 29 at 5pm.

Wristbands purchased during the fair will cost $30. Th-Su through 8/2. Opens

7/30. $T20 pre-sale, $30 at fair. Fuji Park, 601 Old Clear Creek Rdoad, Carson City, 283-7469; http://nevadafair.com. NORTHERN NEVADA PRIDE PRIDE FESTIVAL AND

PARADE: The Artown event celebrates the diversity and acceptance of the local LGBT community and families with live musical entertainment, food, fun and more. The CommUNITY Pride Parade kicks off at 10am, followed by the festival in Wingfield Park. Artists, businesses, allies and people of all ages come together to celebrate LGBT pride. Presented by Build Our Center. Sa, 7/25, 10am-4pm. $5 suggested donation. Wingfield Park, 300 W.

First St., (775) 298-1479, www.northernnevadapride.org. RAIL CITY FARMERS’ MARKET: The boutique

market will offer fresh produce and products from local farms and food purveyors, including Snyder Family Farms, Workman Farms, Sand Hill Dairy, the Bakery Gallery and Mitchell Pickle Packing Company. Su, 10am-2pm through 9/27. Free

admission. Rail City Garden Center, 1720

Brierley Way, Sparks, 355-1551; www.railcitygardencenter.com. RENO STREET FOOD: PARTY IN THE PARK:

The gourmet street food event features live music and more than 25 vendors of gourmet food, craft desserts, beer, wine and mixed drinks vendors and live music.

Relax in the park and bring your lawn chairs and a blanket. F, 5-9pm through 10/2. Free admission. Idlewild Park, 1900

Idlewild Drive, (805) 795-0539. SANDS FARMERS’ MARKET: Eighty vendors

under a 10,000-square foot tent will sell fresh produce and more from the area. Bring the kids to join the fun and activities in the Kids Zone. Live bands perform every week. Th, 4-9pm through 8/27. Free.

Sands Regency Casino Hotel, 345 N. Arlington Ave., (775) 348-2295, www.shirleysfarmersmarkets.com. SPARKS FOOD TRUCK DRIVE-IN: Local food

trucks and specialty vendors will have food and treats available for purchase, followed by a free movie in the newly renovated St. Mary’s Outdoor Amphitheater. The event will be held on the second and fourth Saturdays of the month through September. In August, the event will take place on the third and fifth Saturday. Sa, 7/25, 6-9pm; Sa, 8/15, 6-9pm; Sa, 8/29, 6-9pm; Sa, 9/12, 6-9pm; Sa, 9/26, 6-9pm. Free

admission. Victorian Square, 14th Street and Pyramid Way along Victorian Ave. in Sparks; https://www.facebook.com/ foodtruckdrivein.

STUDIO E: EPILEPSY ART THERAPY EVENT: Join

the Renown Institute for Neurosciences and the Epilepsy Foundation for a day of artistic expression. Participants will work with art therapists and others with epilepsy to create artistic pieces. Th, 7/23, 5:15-6:30pm; Th, 7/30, 5:15-6:30pm. Free. Lake

Mansion, 250 Court St., (775) 826-6100, http://bit.ly/epilepsyart. TAHOE RIM TRAIL ASSOCIATION’S ANNUAL THRU

HIKE: Two Thru Hike groups will circle the 165-mile rim of the Tahoe Basin during two expeditions this summer. The first expedition will run from July 25 to Aug. 8 with a second trip from Aug. 22 to Sept. 5. Participants will be led around the Tahoe Rim Trail by three or four experienced volunteer guides. This experience is not for first-time backpackers. Call to register. M-Su through 8/8. Opens 7/25; M-Su through 9/5. Opens 8/22. $1,725. Tahoe Rim

Trail, Incline Village, (775) 298-0012, www.tahoerimtrail.org. TANNERS MARKETPLACE ANTIQUES CRAFTS

SHOW: Local small businesses sell their handmade crafts, antiques and collectibles. Sa, 7/25, 9am-5pm; Su, 7/26, 9am-3pm.

$4-$5. Reno-Sparks Livestock Events Center Exhibit Hall, 1350 N. Wells Ave., (775) 741-9524, http://tannersreno.com. VALHALLA ART, MUSIC AND THEATRE FESTIVAL:

The 34th annual festival celebrates music, theater and the visual arts with concerts, exhibits, events and activities that continue throughout August. The events occur in the Boathouse Theatre, The Valhalla Grand

Hall and lawn. M-Su through 8/26. Prices vary. Tallac Historic Site, 1 Valhalla Road, off Highway 89 in South Lake Tahoe, (530) 541-4975, http://valhallatahoe.com. VILLAGE WINE WALK SERIES: The Village at

Northstar hosts a Wine Walk Series the last Saturday of each month from through August. An array of wine and food sampling stations will greet participants from 4 p.m. to 7 p.m. Sa, 7/25, 4-7pm; Sa, 8/29,

4-7pm. $25 before event, $30 at event. The Village at Northstar, 3001 Northstar Drive, Truckee, (530) 562-1010, www.northstarcalifornia.com/activities/wine-walks. aspx?page=viewall.

All Ages

FAMILY FESTIVAL: SECRET AGENT 23 SKIDOO:

Combining word play, storytelling and multi-instrumental productions, 23 Skidoo bumps up the volume and kids’ selfesteem. Come early for crafts, games, face painting and more from 5 to 7pm. The show takes place from 7 to 8pm. M, 7/27, 5-8pm. Free. Wingfield Park, 300 W. First St., (775) 322-1538, www.renoisartown.com. GIRLS SUMMER CAMP: Girl Scouts of the

Sierra Nevada offers an overnight summer camp at Camp Wasiu II in Sierra

City, California and a summer day camp in Reno open to all girls. Financial aid is available and transportation is available to/from the overnight camp. One-week overnight sessions at Camp Wasiu II run

June 21–July 21. One-week summer day camp sessions run July 27–31 and Aug. 3–7. Through 8/7. $160 (day camp)-$725 (sleep over camp). Girl Scouts of the

Sierra Nevada, 605 Washington St., (775) 322-0642 ext. 1202, www.gssn.org/ en/camp/explore-camp/camp-guide.html.

Mourning breath

I was engaged to a woman 20 years ago. We were in college and in our mid-20s. I realized that I wasn’t ready to get married and called off the engagement. I loved her and wanted to stay with her, but she broke off the relationship. I’ve had relationships since then, but I still regret not marrying her. She’s married now, and I shouldn’t even be thinking about her so many years later, but I can’t seem to shake the loss of her. How do I get her—and, moreover, the regret—out of my head?

The reality is, you’re the envy of a number of people—like those who ran up $80,000 in legal fees battling for joint custody of the suede sectional and are now working as a manservant for their divorce lawyer while living in a tent in his backyard.

You’ve got a bad case of the “coulda shouldas,” which, in psychology, is called “counterfactual thinking,” as in thinking “counter” to the actual “facts” of what happened. It’s basically a mental redo of the past—imagining what could have been. There’s healthy counterfactual thinking—using how things turned out as a reminder to act differently in the future. Also healthy is recognizing that things could have turned out worse, like with all the divorcey fun above, plus having to borrow your kids like library books on alternate weekends.

The unhealthy kind of counterfactual thinking is what you’re doing—setting aside the now to obsess over how great things surely would have been, “if only…” Never mind how pointless this is, considering that the closest thing you own to a working time machine is probably a battery-operated cuckoo clock. And never mind how this woman is forever 24 in your head—preserved like a bug in amber at the peak of her hotitude—and never does things those pesky real women do, like nagging you to fix that broken thingie until your head is about to explode all over the kitchen wallpaper.

You can get out of Regretsville. You just need to have a funeral for your relationship. And yes, I know this sounds like a ridiculously hokey stunt, but more and more, researchers are finding that the physical is tied to the psychological—that physical acts of “closure” lead to psychological closure and that treating thoughts as physical objects makes them as disposable as objects. In a study by psychologist Pablo Brinol, participants who wrote down troubling thoughts and then ripped them up were found to have “mentally discarded them” and actually experienced relief. Following their lead, put this behind you psychologically by doing it physically: Write down what happened. Burn the paper in a dish. Maybe do a little ceremony. And then scatter the ashes as you would those from Fluffy’s urn.

And, finally, have a little compassion for yourself. So, it’s best not to follow up “Will you marry me?” with “Uh … take-back!” But you were young and probably immature, and you realized that you’d gotten yourself in over your head. And to your credit, you had the guts to admit that you weren’t ready, unlike all the people who come to the realization that they aren’t but go through with the wedding anyway. (“Who’ll join me in a toast to ‘miserably ever after!’?”)

Jerk du Soleil

A good male friend (going back 20 years) is a great guy—fiercely ethical and very kind—and is irate about the jerks I’ve been out with recently. He has two guy friends he thinks I’d like. Is it safe to assume that they’ll be cool/respectful because this is coming through our mutual friend? I figure it can’t be worse than blind dating online.

A friend who cares about you wouldn’t knowingly put you together with jerks—which would be like recommending a prospective tenant to his landlord with “He just wants a quiet, safe place …” and neglecting to mention “… where he can pursue his hobby of balcony chicken farming.”

And the good news is that a good guy is likely to have friends “of a feather.” Studies by psychologist J. Philippe Rushton suggest that we have a genetically driven preference for both mates and friends who are similar to us—especially in age, ethnicity and educational level, but also in opinions and attitudes. So, if this guy likes and respects women, there’s a good chance his friends do, too. But a “good chance” is not the same thing as an “ironclad guarantee.” In other words, go in with your eyes wide open, because it’s still largely a gamble—it’s just less likely that your friend will be all “Found the perfect guy for you. We all call him ‘B’ because it’s easier than saying ‘Beelzebub.’” Ω

Got a problem? Write Amy Alkon, 171 Pier Ave., No. 280, Santa Monica,CA 90405, or email AdviceAmy@aol.com (www.advicegoddess.com).