March 27, 2014

HAPPY APRIL FOOLS’ DAY!

RENo’s NEws & ENtERtaiNmENt wEEkly

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March 27, 2014

Send letters to renoletters@newsreview.com

Back to life

How’s this?

Welcome to this week’s Reno News & Review.

“Back to life, back to reality, back to the here and now,” lyrics by Soul II Soul, has been running through my head since I got back to Reno.

My girlfriend Kelly and I went went down to NapaSonoma for a few days for spring break and to celebrate my 52nd birthday. My time off was awesome; great people, great wine, mud baths in Calistoga, seafood stew on Bodega Bay. I slept like a baby every night, a partial recharge to get me through the next two months until summer and gardening take the pressure off.

You’ll recall those stories I did a few weeks ago, “Who watches the watchers?” and its followup “Who shot Darcie Latham?” and our associated website, fatalencounters.org.

Well, that blew up on Tuesday, the day before I went on vacation with a story on Truthout

by Bethania Palma Marus, at http://tinyurl.com/npabth9; the Truthout story had like 1,700 “likes” in Facebook. A lot of media outfits called and emailed while I was tipsy in Napa, including, “Reel” Talk Radio with Brother J., The Last Word with Lawrence O’Donnell, even Brooklapping, a TV production company based in London.

Needless to say, I sent carefully worded, sober emails thanking them for their interest, expressing my own, and saying I’ll be available this week. We’ll see what comes of all that. I hate to think I missed any opportunities. Being an editor for an extremely local weekly newspaper doesn’t really prepare anyone for any of this kind of attention.

I’m just trying to keep my head on straight and focused until the next story comes out.

The Twitter site, @fatalenounters, was also doing pretty well after the Truthout piece came out, with some pretty interesting twits contacting me and retweeting. Lots of emails of encouragement and offers of help from activists, journalists, law enforcement—even a professional GIS analyst wrote to offer help. It’s all pretty overwhelming, really.

Here we go: Back to life, back to surreality.

I’m a current member of Phi Delta Epsilon an international medical fraternity, one of the first here at the University of Nevada, Reno. Phi Delta Epsilon is an organization driven to assist college students who aspire to become future physicians. In May, we will be holding our annual Miracle Madness: Dance Marathon event to raise money for Children’s Miracle Network, an international non-profit organization that raises funds for children’s hospitals, medical research, and community awareness of children’s health issues. Miracle Madness is a six-hour philanthropic dance marathon, focused on raising funds and community awareness. Intended for people of all ages, Miracle Madness offers tons of events. Best part is that all of our proceeds go to our local children’s hospital at Renown Regional Medical Center. We are hoping to see if we could get you to endorse our event simply by advertising for it in any way possible.

Jeffrey Dominguez Reno

Ummm, I’m tellin’ Re “And get off my lawn” (Letters to the Editor, March 20): I agree with the reader’s comment that Bruce Van Dyke is a moron. I never liked him as a radio personality, and I like him even less as a columnist. But let the fuckstick known as Bruce Van Dyke say what he wants. Who cares?

John Gibson Sparks

$2,000,000,000.00 Re “Dear City of Reno mayoral candidate” (Left Foot Forward, March 20): I really liked Sheila Leslie’s essay on the mayoral race, but I’m still waiting for her answer to my (old) question. What happened to the state’s $2 billion tobacco settlement money?

Jon Obester Reno

Our Mission To publish great newspapers that are successful and enduring. To create a quality work environment that encourages people to grow professionally while respecting personal welfare. To have a positive impact on our communities and make them better places to live.

Nada Dada shish boom badda With low expectations my gal and I attended the Morris Hotel “Nada-Gras” event recently on East Fourth Street.

From several blocks away, we detected a full, operatic voice beckoning us from beyond the darkened buildings and gravel alleys that led to the rear of the hotel. Climbing to the second floor artist rooms we soon greeted the perennial Eric Holland. Then a squeeze into some first-floor lobby seats as Bernie Beauchamp was wrapping up his puppet act. Josiah Knight appeared on stage next hiding behind an unkempt beard and thick woolen cap, with the look of a guileless amateur.

I searched for an escape route but, blocked in, I stayed put and by the end of the first song he possessed the room. The close of the set was marked by thunderous applause and cheering.

He sang originals with impassioned, stirring lyrics and played his acoustic guitar fearlessly. His performance was followed by a duo that featured another gifted singer/songwriter whose name escapes me. I felt as if I were present at the rebirth of lyric and melody.

Has the Morris become a nexus for a Reno renaissance? I commend the new owner and hope that his musical tastes continue to bring us such excellence!

Steve Lefevre Reno

Taking shots at CDC? Re “Take two. They’re small.” (Let Freedom Ring, March 13): Brendan Trainor notes that CDC is large, centralized, public and staffed with experts. That is exactly the right description for a national public health service. It’s large, because we’re a large country. It’s centralized, because we want the best data to come unambiguously from a single source. It’s public, because “promote the general welfare” is a primary duty of the public sector. It’s staffed with experts because, obviously, the task requires highly specialized knowledge.

To assert that CDC is untrustworthy because it’s all those things is absurd.

Editor/Publisher D. Brian Burghart News Editor Dennis Myers Arts Editor Brad Bynum Calendar Editor Kelley Lang Staff writer Sage Leehey Contributors Amy Alkon, Woody Barlettani, Laura Davis, Bob Grimm, Ashley Hennefer, Sheila Leslie, Dave Preston, Jessica Santina, Todd South, Brendan Trainor, Bruce Van Dyke, Allison Young

Creative Director Priscilla Garcia Art Director Hayley Doshay Junior Art Director Brian Breneman Design Vivian Liu, Serene Lusano, Marianne Mancina, Skyler Smith Advertising Consultants Gina Odegard, Bev Savage Senior Classified Advertising Consultant Olla Ubay Office Manager/Ad Coordinator Karen Brooke Executive Assistant/Operations Coordinator Nanette Harker

—D. Brian Burghart

brianb@ ne wsreview . com

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The reason we have CDC (and WHO) address epidemics is that pathogens affect everyone, everywhere. We need a coordinated response. Private enterprises could hardly accomplish that through competition. Should we have all 50 state health departments consider dozens of competing recommendations from vaccine vendors?

Have the vendors self-regulate? Certify their own products? In a pandemic, would we want the best people scattered around, fighting for market share? Do we sell vaccine by auction when the need spikes? This all makes as much sense as privatizing the Coast Guard. Have we simply run out of things to make money from?

About that flu/pneumonia conspiracy: Pneumonia is the most frequent complication for influenza. That’s why they’re basically treated as a syndrome.

Getting a flu shot makes it much less likely you’ll be one of the 40,000 Americans who die from this each year. It also makes it less likely you’ll pass the infection on to others, which is the real reason we get vaccinations.

Effectiveness is halved by those, like Trainor, who don’t participate. If we were all as selfish as Libertarians, the program would lose all effectiveness.

Sure, we’d have all kinds of consumer choice in the matter, and 20,000 more dead each year. Everyone else can’t simply opt out of infection the way some opt out of vaccination.

CDC has been on the libertarian “enemies list” for some time. In 1993, a CDC-funded study was published called “Gun ownership as a risk factor for homicide in the home.” It showed that having guns in the home makes people more likely to be killed with one, not less. (Evidence is not kind to libertarianism.) The NRA—a highly libertarian pressure group—reacted by pushing Congress to effectively ban CDC research on firearm injuries. A similar thing is happening today with the NRA derailing the nominee for Surgeon General. So this stuff is not just the usual “privatize everything” pitch. It’s more of a grudge shooting.

C.G. Green Reno

Distribution Manager Valerie Mets Distribution Drivers Trevor Bexon, Sandra Chhina, Ron Large, Joe Medeiros, Ron Neill, Andy Odegard, Jesse Pike, Martin Troye, Warren Tucker, Matthew Veach, Gary White, Joseph White General Manager/Publisher John D. Murphy President/CEO Jeff vonKaenel Chief Operations Officer Deborah Redmond Human Resource Manager Tanja Poley Business Manager Grant Ronsenquist

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Just get a shot Re “Take two. They’re small.” (Let Freedom Ring, March 13): Brendan Trainor’s column is usually harmless, sometimes amusing, and very occasionally I agree with a point he makes. His recent anti-fluvaccine column, however, is dangerous and wrong on a number of points: 1) Pneumonia, which can cause death, is sometimes a secondary infection that occurs after having the flu. If the person would have avoided getting the flu, he or she would not have gotten pneumonia in the first place.

2) The CDC does not “guess” which strains of influenza virus to include in a particular year’s flu vaccine. CDC scientists predict which strains will be prevalent, then formulate the vaccine accordingly. (Of course if you don’t believe in science, that’s the same as guessing.)

3) Trainor shows a lack of understanding of mathematics. In the hypothetical example he gives, two people get the flu out of 100 people vaccinated, which is a 2 percent infection rate. In the control group, none of the 100 people is vaccinated, six of them get the flu, for a 6 percent infection rate. Therefore, statistically, the vaccine was 67 percent effective, not 60 percent (i.e. 6 minus 2 equals 4, then 4 divided by 6 equals 67 percent).

Trainor then combines the vaccinated and the control groups, which is not statistically valid because they are two different data sets. The best way to look at the data is to compare the chances of getting flu with and without being vaccinated. Using Mr. Trainor’s hypothetical data, someone who is not vaccinated is three times more likely to get the flu compared to someone who did get vaccinated (i.e. 6 percent compared to 2 percent).

I have little sympathy for people who choose not to get the flu vaccine, then get sick. You can’t protect people from their own stupidity. However, when a person gets sick, he or she becomes a walking reservoir of influenza organisms. This increases the risk of everyone else getting the flu.

Michael Powell Reno

Business Nicole Jackson, Tami Sandoval Systems Manager Jonathan Schultz Systems Support Specialist Joe Kakacek Web Developer/Support Specialist John Bisignano 708 North Center Street Reno, NV 89501 Phone (775) 324-4440 Fax (775) 324-4572 Classified Fax (916) 498-7940 Mail Classifieds & Talking Personals to N&R Classifieds, Reno Edition, 1015 20th Street, Sacramento, CA 95814 or email classifieds@ newsreview.com

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Web site www.newsreview.com Printed by Paradise Post The RN&R is printed using recycled newsprint whenever available.

Editorial Policies Opinions expressed in the RN&R are those of the authors and not of Chico Community Publishing, Inc. Contact the editor for permission to reprint articles, cartoons or other portions of the paper. The RN&R is not responsible for unsolicited manuscripts. All letters received become the property of the publisher. We reserve the right to print letters in condensed form.

Cover design: Brian Breneman

MARCH 27, 2014

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special aDVeRTising secTion

It’s happen ing in

ACTIVITIES START YOUR GARDEN

Presented by Randy Robison. What you can plant right now to start the season. Sa, 3/29, 11AM & 1PM, free. Rail City Garden Center, 1720 Brierley Way. (775) 355-1551

SCHEELS KIDS KLUB: AN AQUARIUM ADVENTURE

Join the Scheels Aquarium Expert to learn about all the swimming friends inside Scheels! Please meet by the freshwater aquarium.

M, 3/31, 6PM, free. Scheels, 1200 Scheels Dr. (775) 331-2700

BANFF MOUNTAIN FILM FESTIVAL

Join Nevada Land Trust for their largest annual fundraiser on Thursday, April 3, at the Nugget Rose Ballroom for an amazing evening of award-winning outdoor film. Th, 4/3, 7-9:30PM, $20$55 John Ascuaga’s Nugget, 1100 Nugget Ave. (775) 356-3300

GRAFTING FRUIT TREES

Presented by Michael Janik. Learn simple techniques of grafting apple trees. Each participant will make six (6) trees to take home.

Please RSVP—class is limited. Sa, 4/5, 10AM-noon & 2-4PM, $40, Rail City Garden Center, 1720 Brierley Way. (775) 355-1551

2ND ANNUAL ROADMAP TO HOMEOWNERSHIP

The Nevada Rural Housing Authority (NRHA) is hosting a free Homebuyer’s Expo designed to educate prospective homeowners on what goes into buying a house. Sa, 4/5, 10:30AM-2:30PM, free.

John Ascuaga’s Nugget, 1100 Nugget Ave.(775) 356-3300

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!

The book club meets the first Saturday of each month. Call to find out each month’s book title. First Sa of every month, 1-2PM, free. Sparks Library, 1125 12th St. (775) 352-3200

PERFORMANCE AND MUSIC

CROCHET CONNECTION

F, 3/28, 9:30pm, no cover. Sidelines Bar & Nightclub, 1237 Baring Blvd., (775) 355- 1030

FOUR SEASONS BOOK CLUB

Learn to crochet or share tips with other crochet enthusiasts. Th, 4-5:45PM, free.

Spanish Springs Library, 7100A Pyramid Lake Highway, Spanish Springs. (775) 424-1800

SCHEELS RUNNING CLUB

ALIAS SMITH

THE NOVELISTS CD RELEASE SHOW

Sa, 3/29, 8PM, $15-$20. John Ascuaga’s Nugget, 1100 Nugget Ave. (775) 356-3300

Run with expert pacers and enjoy running in a group as we join the Reno Running & Fitness Tuesday night group runs. Tu, 6:30PM through 12/9, free. Scheels, 1200 Scheels Dr. (775) 331-2700

LIVE MONDAYS WITH TANY JANE

CLICKETS KNITTING GROUP

BLACK AND BLUES JAM

Jean Peters guides this class for knitters of all ages and levels.

Yarn and needles are available. First and Third Su of every month, 1:30-3PM, free. Spanish Springs Library, 7100A Pyramid Lake Highway, Spanish Springs (775) 424-1800

WOMEN’S DEFENSIVE TACTICS

Designed to build confidence through the knowledge gained by training in such techniques as Jeet Kune Do and Judo. Tu, 7-8:30PM through 12/31, $25 a month. Osk Training, 636 Greenbrae Dr. (775) 343-2526

CONVERSATION CORNER

Washoe County Library presents a series of English language learning sessions. The group will practice speaking English around various scenarios that the average person encounters. W, 4:30-6PM. free. Sparks Library, 1125 12th St. (775) 352-3200

Open mic night every Monday at 8PM, hosted by Tany Jane.

M, 8PM, no cover. Sidelines Bar & Nightclub, 1237 Baring Blvd.

(775) 355-1030

ERIKA PAUL

Enjoy Louisiana-style food and the soulful, breathtaking jazz sounds of Erika Paul on keyboards and vocals. Th, 6PM, no cover. Jazz, A Louisiana Kitchen, 1180 Scheels Dr. (775) 6578659

FIRST TAKE FEATURING RICK METZ F, 6PM, no cover. Jazz, A Louisiana Kitchen, 1180 Scheels Dr. (775) 657-8659

BILL DAVIS

Sa, 6PM, no cover. Jazz, A Louisiana Kitchen, 1180 Scheels Dr. (775) 657-8659

KARAOKE

Th-Sa, 9PM, no cover. Bottom’s Up Saloon, 1923 Prater Way (775) 359-3677

Tu, 8:30PM, no cover. Sidelines Bar & Nightclub, 1237 Baring Blvd. (775) 355-1030

KARAOKE WITH BOBBY DEE

Tu, 8PM, no cover. Morelli’s G Street Saloon, 2285 G St., Sparks, (775) 355-8281

OPEN JAM WITH TAZER AND FRIENDS

W, 8PM. no cover. Sidelines Bar & Nightclub, 1237 Baring Blvd.

(775) 355-1030

NEW KARAOKE LINEUP FOR THURSDAY NIGHTS

Get your karaoke fix! Th, 7-10PM through 4/24, no cover. Elbow Room Bar, 2002 Victorian Ave., (775) 356-9799

THis secTion is pRoViDeD as a pUBlic seRVice BY THe Reno neWs & ReVieW anD is noT FUnDeD oR aFFiliaTeD WiTH THe ciTY oF spaRKs

by Dennis Myers

This ModErn World

by tom tomorrow

Experienced any April Fool jokes?

Asked at Yellow Submarine Deli, 920 Holman Way Jessica Aguiar Waitress

I’m never pulled an April Fool’s joke, but my mom has pulled quite a few on me. I’m not a fan of them. … Last year she called me and told me that something happened to my sister. The year before that she told me that she fell down the stairs. She did one that my sister was pregnant, and she was very young, so that was also not funny.

Lisa Zito Mother

When I was a child, yes, I did. It wasn’t really that funny to us, but as we got older, it made it more funny.

My sister used to put rocks in my bed. ... When I was about 22, she came back home and put rocks in our bed again. It was nothing funny on April Fool’s, but it became funny.

Rachel Kendall Cashier

Let’s get logical Listen up for a second. In every discussion we’ve ever heard about diversifying Nevada’s economy, one thing has been made clear: In order for Nevada’s future prospects to improve, education on all levels must improve.

So, can we at least start our discussion about the Education Initiative there?

Schools need to improve to increase odds that Nevadans will have a more livable future. Every facet of education from pre-kindergarten to graduate schools to state and county administration needs to improve. Every aspect from capital funding to curriculum to accountability and transparency needs to improve.

That is our conviction. It was not established on these pages, but in the executive summaries of nearly every single diversification and economic study done in Nevada during the last 20 years.

Education in Nevada must improve at all levels.

Once we accept that premise, we can move on to tackling the real issues. If we recognize the truth, then we, as a state, can have the courage of our convictions.

Material improvements always cost money. If we’re improving our house, we must at least purchase materials, even if we can do the labor ourselves. It’s the rare individual who can do plumbing, electricity, carpentry and masonry. Permitting will cost money. There are always unavoidable costs for improvement.

Simple conditional statement: If improvement requires money, then there will be costs attached to improving education.

The Education Initiative is a tax that will be levied upon businesses that gross more than $1 million

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Yes, when we all call into work and say we’re not coming in, to see how many people will say they’re not coming in. I think now employers are used to it.

annually. But we’ll all feel it. Those businesses will pass it on to the rest of us as best they can. It won’t be available to be applied to all aspects of education—it may not even be applied to those aspects that need it most.

All taxes have negatives.

But if we assume a brighter economic future for the state is also good for all of us who live in it, and we remember our conviction that the first cultural change that needs to happen is with the improvement of education at all levels, then we know that we must pay for it because we all benefit from it. For example, an improved economic forecast will improve property values for those retired people who don’t generally fund education initiatives.

Nevada requires a legislative supermajority for tax increases. That law got on the Nevada Constitution by the will of the people. The people did not assume we’d never have reason to raise another tax. But even at the time of its passage, we didn’t assume that members of legislative bodies would be afraid to do what is necessary for the people of the state, but we’ve been shown differently, particularly when the state legislature tried to pass the buck for a tax hike to the Washoe County Commission.

A tax that will affect us all must be passed by a simple majority of the people. It’s the only method to improve education available to us.

It’s impossible to say that the Education Initiative will pass, but we can say that if education needs to improve, then it should pass.

It’s only logical. Ω

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Bob Piersol Equipment operator

I turned all the clocks back three hours on my wife. I woke her up early. She said, “Why’s the sun out?” Scared the hell out of her.

Kathy Smith Tax preparer

Yes. It’s the best thing in the world. All you do is call or text someone and say, “The doctor’s test came back, and it’s positive.” Or I tell my boyfriend I’m pregnant, and I’m in my 50s.

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Strange days It’s already a strange election year in Reno.

Twenty people signed up to run for Mayor, and the two City Council races attracted 15 more. If you’re a Reno voter, that means you’ll have 35 people to choose from in those three races on June 10. In another month or so, we’ll start sorting out by who’s serious, who’s in it for five Sheila Leslie minutes of fame, and who just filed for fun.

What about the other races should progressives be paying attention to during the early campaign months?

Without a presidential or U.S. Senate race on the ballot, one would expect some excitement for a congressional seat or in the governor’s race, but both of those are noncompetitive this cycle.

Washoe County belongs to Congressional District 2, a district where no Democrat has ever won, despite having superior candidates in many years. Let’s face the facts: Rural Nevada is not going to vote Democratic any time in the foreseeable future, and the leftward swing in the urban parts of the district

hasn’t been strong enough to counteract that unfortunate truth.

Instead we’re stuck with decent people like Mark Amodei who go to Washington to represent us and immediately become unrecognizable right-wing zealots to avoid being Sharron Angled in their next primary race. It’s sad, really.

Democrats also lack a viable candidate to challenge Gov. Brian Sandoval. He’s a nice enough man, who has found middle ground on some issues such as expanding Medicaid and implementing Obamacare, but too often hews to his party’s far-right philosophy and makes some bad decisions. These include vetoes of several voting rights bills along with a compassionate common-sense bill to ensure hungry children get fed at school.

There are nine mostly unknown Democrats who signed up to run for governor, five random Republicans and one Independent American Party candidate so there’ll be an opportunity for a protest vote. But without

access to sufficient campaign funds to be competitive, a vote for these candidates is only that, a protest.

The real top of the ticket this year is the lieutenant governor’s race. The Republicans have a huge intra-party feud brewing between “chicken lady” Sue Lowden and half-term state Sen. Mark Hutchison.

Both have separate factions of the Republican party as supporters so it all depends on exactly who shows up to vote on June 10, usually the most fervent, most conservative Republicans. The “let them barter for health care with chickens” lady may well triumph.

The likely Democrat in the race is two-term Assembly member Lucy Flores, a dynamic young Latina who will give either of the Republicans some strong competition. Fully bilingual, with an inspirational life story, she’ll help draw out the progressive and minority vote, which may help other Democrats further down the ticket, though there are not many exciting races down there either.

In Washoe County, legislative races will be decided mostly in the primary. Minority Leader Pat Hickey and Assemblymember Randy Kirner have each drawn conservative Republican primary opponents who are working hard to offer Republicans a choice. Unfortunately, the rest of us will have to live with the primary voters’ decision, as it’s virtually impossible for a Democrat to win in those districts.

The only Democratic legislator with a bit of a race is Assembly member Skip Daly in Sparks with two Republican opponents who will need to battle through a primary before they get to him. But Daly is a tireless campaigner with two terms of solid performance for his district backing him up.

These primary races and others for sheriff, county commissioner and the school board will be very important in narrowing down the field. Ignore the primary at your peril. Your preferred candidate may get bumped because you decided to skip the election. Ω

All your primary questions can be answered here: http://www. ask8ball.net.

March 26 - 30, 2014 Meadowood Mall The must-see, incredible, edible design competition! Teams create giant sculptures out of food. Winning designs are submitted to the national CANstruction and all of the food goes to feed the hungry in our area.

See the teams create their structures on Wednesday, March 26.

Vote for your favorite in the “People’s Choice” Awards $1 per vote — Voters will WIN prizes!

(Each ballot enters you into a raffle.)

Win Reno Tahoe Open passes, Food Bank Concert Tickets, Catch a Rising Star Tickets and more!

“People’s Choice” Voting is Friday, March 28—Sunday, March 30

fbnn.org 6 | RN&R |

MARCH 27, 2014

Reform prisons the right way There is a new conservative prison reform movement in America. It is working to remove or lesson mandatory minimum sentences, and to increase releases of non-violent criminals, and to reverse prison policies many of which were previously passed into law by conservatives. by Brendan The Right on Crime movement Trainor was started by Charles Colson, who was in federal prison for his role in the Watergate scandal. When he was released, he founded Prison Fellowship to help prisoners. From his religious outreach, Colson realized that we have too many prisons, and they are filled not with people we are afraid of, but people we are mad at.

Colson is a product of the fourth Great Awakening, one of several massive religious revivals in American history from 18th century Colonial America to the last one ending in the 1970s. Today’s generation is characterized as “Moralistic Therapeutic Deists” so the revivalist fires necessary for a new awakening are still just faint embers. The Great Awakenings have inspired

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pre-millennial, apocalyptic thinking.

They have been characterized by Bible- and vision-centered theologies, and often produce utopian communities. They also unleash political forces that have changed our history.

The political evangelicals often believe in millennial dispensationalism, which is a very hawkish doctrine that wants the U.S. to guarantee Israel’s safety until the biblical prophecies for the battle of Armageddon and the Rapture are fulfilled. They ally with the secular neocons and are very influential in the Republican Party. The moral majority also works for punitive laws against disturbing the public morals, and they are therefore responsible for most of the non-violent criminals languishing in prison today.

Colson was non-political. He did not seek to gain political power, although he advocated legal change.

Jerry Falwell and the Moral Majority represented the political wing of the Fourth Awakening. Colson never believed that Christianity mixed well with big political ambitions.

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Sen. Rand Paul is from the evangelical state of Kentucky. Paul has advocated for reductions in the mandatory minimum sentencing guidelines and has joined with others like Grover Norquist of Americans for Tax Reform and Gov Rick Perry of Texas in the conservative prison reform movement.

Paul can drive a wedge between the evangelicals and their neocon allies through his justice activism and weaken the War Party. The ultimate prize for classical liberals is peace with trade, cultural exchange, sound money, and a simple legal framework based largely on property rights and contracts. The War Party is against these goals, preferring interventions to promote “democracy,” war, hegemony, centralized monopoly money and crony capitalism.

Nevada does not have an organized Right on Crime group. I do not see where the major parties have made prison reform a Nevada issue.

The ACLU and grassroots groups are left to move the government. The

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ACLU recently won a settlement against the Nevada State Prison in Ely for poor medical conditions.

But, the ACLU is not a government investigative body. It does not pursue legal accountability for those who violated even minimal standards for inmates.

There is a major study on justice and inequality (ASKT 160) sitting in the Nevada Supreme Court since 1997. So far, despite motions to expedite, the court has done nothing about the study. What kind of Supreme Court ignores motions without an explanation?

Nevada has allowed some early releases of nonviolent prisoners through expanded good time credits, but the number of older nonviolent offenders in prison has led the ACLU to call prison the state’s largest nursing home.

Nevada conservatives have a way to go to balance their previous over -zealousness and to be not only right but also smart on crime. Ω

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MARCH 27, 2014

The national website for Right on Crime: www.rightoncrime.com

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PHOTO/DENNIS MYERS

Former state legislator Bob Price, left, chats with columnist and editor of NevadaLabor.com Andrew Barbano at a recent gathering.

Lost painting found?

“I’m not allowed to comment on that,” said local arts figure Turkey Stremmel, not commenting on rumors that a long-lost painting in the former downtown Reno post office has been located.

“I don’t know who told you that,” said local businessman Bernie Carter, who now owns the building.

After it stopped being a post office, the U.S. government handed the 80-year-old art deco building off for $1.25 million to the city of Reno, which promptly sold it in August 2012 to a company owned by Carter, who is converting it to retail shopping.

The building was a New Deal project, designed by local architect Frederic DeLongchamps (born Frederic DeLonchant) in a zigzag moderne style, with ornamentation that was widely admired.

There were rumors for years that a painting done by artist Ben Cunningham on a Works Progress Administration contract in 1936-37 was painted over by a local postmaster (“How the New Deal built Nevada,” RN&R, May 15, 2008). “I presume it was painted over,” said Nevada historian Phil Earl.

“They had a postmaster here CUNNINGHAM SELF PORTRAIT in Reno, and one of the things he did—he didn’t like the New Deal, and he didn’t like the Roosevelt administration—and he had them painted over.” He said there were also some exterior swastikas that were chiseled off after the symbol became identified with the Third Reich. Interior swastikas (a Native American symbol) on post office counters survived. The WPA was a New Deal agency, and it also provided for paintings in the Yerington, Winnemucca and Lovelock post offices. They have survived without vandalism.

A newsletter of the Historic Reno Preservation Society reported, “He [Cunningham] became involved with WPA mural art in California, beginning as one of the 26 artists chosen to record their impressions of the time on the walls of the interior of Coit Tower in 1934. A mural in the post office in Ukiah, Calif., painted in 1939, was also the work of Cunningham.”

“Ben A. Cunningham, former Reno artist now living in San Francisco, has been awarded a contract for painting murals in the lobby of the Reno post office building,” read a 1936 Reno Evening Gazette report. “He will be paid a total of $2,200 for the work, officials of the treasury’s procurement division at Washington announced.”

A 1990 issue of the Nevada Historical Society Quarterly quoted painter Richard Guy Walton that the Reno painting was done by Cunningham in oil and that the mural was covered over by the postmaster soon after it was completed. “He had stripped Nevada of a great piece of art, the most beautiful ceiling I ever saw,” Walton told writer Ingrid Evans.

Rumors have been circulating in recent weeks in Reno that the edges of the painting are visible on a wall or ceiling of the former post office building. One local history buff said, “Everyone’s been waiting for news on the painting.” It is not known whether current technology would make the painting recoverable. City officials have previously expressed concern about the need to protect the painting if possible, including a 2008 letter by Mayor Bob Cashell (Feb. 14, 2008, Historic Resources Commission minutes).

Carter would not say the painting had or had not been found.

“We’ve been focusing on construction and demolition,” he said.

“I’m not ready to talk about it [the painting] one way or another.

We will make a concerted effort to find it when the time comes, but I’m not at liberty to talk about it now.”

—Dennis Myers

8 | RN&R |

MARCH 27, 2014

Hiding in plain sight A big story cooks for a couple of years before going mainstream In recent days, residents have been seeing a lot of local news coverage about whether Washoe County’s high by school graduation rate was artificially Dennis Myers propped up, particularly during the brief school district superintendency of Heath Morrison.

Why now? The Las Vegas Review-Journal reported on it last year. Two years ago, Sparks Tribune columnist Andrew Barbano, acting on figures from the NAACP’s Lonnie Feemster, reported it. Indeed, in North Carolina—Morrison’s subsequent port of call—the Charlotte Observer reported on Washoe’s uncertain statistics in May 2012. Why did it take so long to reach Renoites?

“[Barbano’s] sometimes digging where other people don’t.”

Ed Pearce Reno reporter In 2012, the Washoe County School District was reporting that the graduation rate jumped from 56 percent in 2009 to 70 percent. The figures were mostly reported without scrutiny by television stations—if they were mentioned at all—and a “fact checker” column was the closest the Gazette-Journal came to examining them. The newspaper didn’t give it the emphasis it did last week—an entire section front page that jumped inside.

At the same time that year, Barbano reported that the 70 percent

figure represented a decline, not a rise: “But if you believe data that WCSD filed with the Nevada Dept. of Education, Hispanic students showed a 5.1 percent decline from 2009 to 2011, as did blacks (-1.7), American Indians/ Alaska Natives (-5.1) and whites (-3.1).

The overall graduation rate dipped by 5.4 points to 71.9 percent.” This article has been posted on Barbano’s website for the past two years, and deals with figures that don’t get counted, as well.

Barbano’s had a varied career. A key operative in a political campaign that defeated the state’s previously invincible U.S. House member, Walter Baring, he himself became the Democratic nominee for the U.S. House in 1984 and ran a quixotic “None of the Above for Governor” campaign in 1982. He has written one of the state’s longest-running columns for the Sparks Tribune since 1988, winning several awards and once nominated for a Pulitzer Prize.

Barbano assists labor unions and the local NAACP in creating an online presence and organizes an annual banquet honoring Cesar Chavez.

One of the pitfalls of this diversity is that for journalists, Barbano doesn’t fit any familiar category. Had his claims come from someone with a title, they would likely have gotten greater attention. In addition, if Barbano had not been a news competitor through the Sparks Tribune, this issue might very well have gotten more attention sooner.

A lot of local community figures, often described as gadflies, are similarly discounted by a lot of reporters.

Barbano doesn’t fit into that category, but he also isn’t plugged into a lot of the usual places like service clubs and chambers of commerce.

In addition, some reporters follow Tallyrand’s maxim “Surtout, pas trop de zele”—above all, not too much zeal. They are made uncomfortable by advocates. And there is some legitimacy to that feeling.

Veteran journalist Frank Mullen, now also a University of Nevada, Reno journalism instructor, said an entity like the Associated Press Reno bureau is not likely to pick up something from Barbano’s column or website and send it out more or less unchanged—as they would with a television or Gazette-Journal story— because he is a partisan.

“Andy, being an advocate of unions and other causes, he’s got an agenda,” Mullen said. “He may be lumped in with people perceived as speaking only for things that fit their agenda.”

Television veteran Ed Pearce said of Barbano, “Andy prints his stuff off to the side where it doesn’t get seen.

A lot of the time, he’s plowing ground that nobody else notices. I talk to him a couple of times a year on various stuff. He’s sometimes digging where other people don’t.”

It’s true that Barbano’s forum— the twice-a-week Sparks Tribune—is not read by some valley newspeople, which is foolish. Sparks is too big a part of the market not to be reading its newspaper. The problem, on a smaller scale, is akin to the way the Knight Ridder newspapers raised substantial questions about the Bush administration claims of weapons of mass destruction in Iraq, and major entities like the television networks, New York Times, and Washington Post never knew it because they didn’t read any of the chain’s 20-plus newspapers.

Reno television station news departments have another problem.

At one time they had serious beats covered by assigned reporters. But over the years, as Reno stations added more newscasts without generally increasing staffs, the existing reporters were pushed harder to cover more and produce more versions of the each day’s stories for multiple newscasts.

Beats fell by the wayside, though they may still be technically in place.

“What we need is a lot of highquality, interchangeable parts,” said then-KOLO news director Brad Brokaw in 2002.

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Television reporters thus are expected to cover a city council meeting one day, school dropouts the next, a bank robbery the day after that, then the Medicaid load. The result is that they are rarely able to develop a depth of knowledge on local government, education, law enforcement, or health care, and are less likely to know the nuances of something like the high school graduation rate.

Who gets heard?

When Pearce was KOLO news director, he had a framed poster on the wall listing people who regularly get interviewed by reporters and those who regularly get ignored by reporters. The poster has disappeared over several remodelings, but one recollection is that it read something like this: “Who Gets Attention/ White men, Rich people, Athletes, Performers, Politicians. Who Gets Ignored/ Children (until they are victims), People of color, Homeless people, Poor people.”

Who reporters should listen to is an ongoing topic in journalism.

The Columbia Journalism Review, a publication that scrutinizes journalism practices and ethics, has published articles in recent years with sentences like these: “So it used to be that you would get stories by chatting to people in bars, and it still might be that you’ll do it that way some times.” (2010).

“Wouldn’t it be nice, though, if we also got to hear from someone in that

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‘almost half’ that doesn’t pay income tax at all (often because they can’t afford to)? Maybe they could tell us how they’re doing, who they resent, and what seems fair to them” (2011).

“And in the current budget debate, the people getting heard are often those pushing the argument that spending is out of control and must be cut” (2011).

“ Things kind of get lost in this deluge of information.”

Frank Mullen Journalism instructor Mullen said while the conventional wisdom is that major media have lost their gatekeeper role, “I don’t believe that at all.” Barbano and other online journalists have become so numerous, Mullen said, the major media are the only way they get sorted out.

“He’s competing with millions of other voices out there,” he said of Barbano. “I think things kind of get lost in this deluge of information. …

Even though everyone’s got their own megaphone now, if you want to get that story out, you’ve got to get it out through the major media.”

Barbano said he will keep writing about the situation and that the NAACP’s Feemster is still tracking the numbers. “The fuzzing up of racial and ethnic enrollments contributes to an already-vague system ripe for more manipulation,” Barbano said. Ω

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Community is not easy to find once a city grows to a certain point, but occasionally it appears. Here a member of one of Reno’s oldest families, the Caviglias, gives a hug to Doc Watson on his last day at work at Raley’s Grocery on Keystone Avenue. Watson has been a fixture for people who live in the northwest, with his familiar greetings—“Shirley, how are you?”; “What’s up, senator?”; “Good to see you, Tom.” Customers poured into the store on his retirement to say goodbye. Among gifts he received, a three-liter bottle of wine. Watson is an enophile (“Wine guy,” RN&R, Jan. 6, 2011) who will now be able to devote full time to his avocation, setting up wine tastings around the region.

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Photo/Sage Leehey

NORTHERN NEVADA INTERNATIONAL CENTER A World Affairs Council Member

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Brian Blair is the Irrigo team leader, an officer in the Navy and a graduate student at the University of Nevada, Reno.

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More efficient irrigation in the works Water—or rather the lack of it—is an oft-discussed issue in the region right now, and appropriately, a new Northern Nevada business called Irrigo is working to bring more efficient water use for flood-irrigated agriculture. by Sage Leehey “It’s an automated system,” Irrigo team leader Brian Blair said.

“It works over the internet, the computer, and we monitor the field to s age l@ figure out the most efficient way to do it. By watering the field more news review.c om efficiently, the farmer can get more crop out of his field or during droughts like this, you can actually irrigate more land than normally it would allow.”

The team’s business plan recently won first place in the Sontag Entrepreneurship Competition, which gave them $50,000 as capital to get the business started. Blair said they expect about 20 percent less water use in their irrigation systems, based on previous research.

“We send commands to the gates over cellular data networks to actually open and close the gates to only give the field exactly the water it needs to get the best crop growth,” Blair said. “The way it’s done now is all manually. Guys will actually go out to a field and actually manually open and close. It’s really time-consuming, and it’s really inefficient because they’re not timing everything exactly the way it needs to be.”

Blair is a graduate student in the Master of Business Administration program at the University of Nevada, Reno, which allowed his team to For more information participate in the competition. The team also includes water researcher about the Sontag from the Desert Research Institute Jenn Frederick, network engineer entrepreneurship in Vermont Kevin Thorley, control system engineer in Fallon Nick Competition, visit www.unr.edu/sontag.

Pinson and test engineer Don Frederick. Colby Frey from Frey Ranch and Churchill Vineyards is not an official member of the team but provides work space and agricultural expertise to the group.

Frey has helped the project along, allowing the team to hear what will and won’t work for farmers and getting them the gates to work with.

“We actually have the farmer perspective as opposed to just a bunch of nerds getting together,” Blair said.

The process is slow-going because each team member has a “real job” and works on this project in their free time, but it’s doing well, according to Blair. They’re currently working on software and hardware development and will probably begin manufacturing this winter. Next year, the team will focus on implementing and testing their product on farms. After that, they’ll begin selling it.

“About two years from now, we expect our first commercial sales, everything in-state initially,” Blair said. “Essentially, three or four years from now we’re looking to sell out of state, and then really get into commercialization in about five years—try to make it into a bigger company.”

Blair said the team’s goal is to make Irrigo successful and make it a viable business that can grow larger over time. Blair himself is an officer in the Navy and has been in Fallon for six years. He likes the area and hopes this project might help plant roots here. Ω

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3/25/14 7:46 AM

Rabid Raccoon to Run foR mayoR! Cites extensive experience collecting and sorting garbage as a political credential

The race to succeed Bob Cashell as Reno’s next mayor has attracted a number of candidates from the city’s political arenas and the private sector. One name that might be unfamiliar to many locals is Patchy, a 2-year-old Reno native, and a resident of the city’s Old Southwest neighborhood.

A Raccoon-American, he is the first Nevadan of Procyonidae descent to run for office in the city.

Patchy currently owns and operates a small business that tests the effectiveness of home security systems. In the past, he has worked in the demolition and garbage removal industries.

“There are important issues that affect many residents of the city that aren’t getting any attention,” said Patchy at a press conference announcing his candidacy last week. “I haven’t heard any of the other candidates mention the importance of maintaining Reno’s sewer system. For many Renoites, those sewers serve a secondary function as an important transportation corridor.”

Another issue that Patchy says is central to his campaign is the local food movement. He says that a regionally focused agriculture is one key way to revitalize the local economy. He has proposed expansive subsidies for local farmers and supports expanding the city’s recycling program. In fact, he views his extensive past experience with collecting and sorting garbage as one of his political credentials.

“Apple cores, banana peels, used Doritos bags—those are all things that can be recycled and reused, either to eat or perhaps to build a nest,” he said.

Some local political commentators have speculated that Patchy’s status as Rabiespositive could become a potential campaign issue. But Patchy says his pre-existing condition has taught him the importance of access to health care. He says he has empathy for struggling families whose lives can be derailed by an illness.

“There’s been a long-standing effort to demonize those of us who live with rabies,” Patchy said. “It’s a stigma I’ve lived with for the last two weeks since I first contracted the disease. Just because I’m prone to sudden fits of hissing and foaming at the mouth, and an irrational fear of water, doesn’t mean I’m not fit to lead the city of Reno.”

—Brat Bi Numbnuts

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terror in the newsrooM! Age-old discontent ignites all out battle Recalling the horrors of the Oxford Comma Clashes of the 1990s, violence erupted in the newsroom of the Las Vegas Review-Journal when a columnist attempted to clarify the noun “so-and-sos” as a plural by adding an extraneous apostrophe.

On Thursday, March 20, the deadline pressure was mounting, and Michael J. Puney was about to put his column, “No News is Good News” to bed. He said he’d been staring at the phrase, “Those dirty so-and-sos” for more than 20 minutes, looking in the AP Stylebook for any clue as to how make the final word look right. He finally turned to the Merriam-Webster online dictionary, which also gave conflicting advice, “plural so–and–sos or so–and– so’s. In less than a second’s time, he hit the apostrophe key, following by Ctrl S. “The Stylebook was about as clear as mud,” he said, nursing the cut under his eye where copy editor Shawn O’Masky had pegged him with a pica pole.

“The guy’s a moron,” O’Masky said, “Look. ‘DO NOT USE: For plurals of numerals or multiple-letter combinations.’ It’s right here under the “Apostrophe” category in the “Punctuation” section. It could not be any clearer; DO NOT, DO NOT, DO NOT. Even the dictionary shows it as secondary, less preferred choice. It totally looks like a possessive there.”

hang it uP!

Cell phones carried in front pocket cause sterility in men and low birth rates in women Less than a decade after the revelation that frequent talking on cell phones causes brain cancer, a corollary, and seemingly obvious related fact has been disclosed by Stanford researchers: Cell phone radiation shrinks testicles and pummels ovaries’ DNA with corrupting rays that threaten the future of humanity.

“It was less of a problem before jeans manufacturers started putting ‘bling’ on back pockets, but once the bling went on, the phones moved to front pockts to keep them from getting scratched,” said lead researcher Ian Phlegming.

“Little” Jimmy Tate was one of the first victims to come forward: “I couldn’t help noticing in the locker room. All these other guys had two parts to their package, and I just had the front one.”

Dr. Phlegming looked at Tate and shrugged. “I don’t think anyone is too surprised.”

—Edmund Snowden 14 | RN&R |

MARCH 27, 2014

Pro-drought forces fault Brown

Is the drought lobby as powerful as the NRA? Drought supporters in California attacked Gov. Jerry Brown for “using tax dollars to interfere with nature.”

On Jan. 17, California Gov. Jerry Brown declared a state of emergency and released a 20-point drought plan.

He has assigned various tasks, including contingency plans, to eight state agencies to mitigate the impact of the drought.

Puney has threatened a lawsuit against both his employer and co-worker. “This kind of hostile work environment must not be allowed,” he said. “Just last week, that asshole came unglued on an intern who insisted on putting double spaces after periods. These things are not set in stone.”

Puney was referring to the obsolete practice of putting two spaces after periods in paragraphs that began in the era of manual typewriters, when two spaces were added because typewriters used monospaced fonts. In other words, an ‘m’ took up the same space as an ‘i’ so two spaces were a more visually pleasing way of ending a sentence.

Staffers say that after the pica pole flew, newsroom exploded with the warring factions brandishing hardcopy dictionaries and other even less sanctioned or even misleading tools like The MLA Style Manual and Guide to Scholarly Publishing and Grammar Girl’s Quick and Dirty Tips for Better Writing.

“It was like a bloodbath in there,” O’Masky said. “I don’t know what comes over these people. I’ve always felt that you should write it the way that looks right to you, and let the copy desk fix things. If it comes over perfect, why do they have jobs anyway?”

—John Q. Public

The pro-drought bloc, which is heavily libertarian, accused “a paternalistic government” of trying to reduce the effects of the drought.

“Drought is part of the rich pageantry of the West, and this intervention is depriving our children of their enjoyment of nature,” said U.S. Rep. Darrell Issa. “This is one more reason for overburdened and over-regulated Californians to move to Nevada. They’ve got a drought, but you don’t see their state government meddling.”

In Reno, local activists agreed, saying it’s wrong not to let nature take its course is, well, the natural order of things. “You don’t let science run amok improving quality of life,” said one. “It’s just like organic foods.”

—Dimness Mired

start ‘eM earlY!

Kids trade books for guns The Nevada Gun Rights Coalition is offering to trade toy guns to children who turn in school books.

In neighborhoods where guns are rare but deprived children can name the characters in Little Women, the coalition has set up “Second Amendment Exchanges” at community centers in an effort to encourage less contemplation and more action.

“There is so much indoor activity these days,” said Washoe District Attorney Richard Gammick, a member of the coalition. “We want to support more outdoor play.”

—Dentist Myass

AmAzing discovery!

Sparks Marina was the site of ancient battle between orcs and men A team of archeologists have from the University of Nevada, Reno, have discovered evidence that present-day Sparks Marina was the site of an epic battle between men and orcs.

Ancient weapons alongside human and orcish skeletons were found at the site.

“These weren’t just ordinary orcs either,” said Dr. Mary Brandybuck, the leader of the archeological expedition. “These were fearsome fighting Uruk-hai.

They were taller, smarter and more ferocious than normal orcs. We’ve discovered traces of pigment on their helms that suggests they bore the mark of the white hand of Saruman.”

gibbons drAft fAils

Former guv paid to never show face in public again Nevada Democrats suffered a setback in their 2014 strategy when former governor Jim Gibbons said he was staying out of elective politics this year.

No specific office was mentioned by party spokespeople in their effort to lure Gibbons into running.

“Any office will do,” said U.S. Sen. Harry Reid. “We aren’t picky. Just having him on the ballot would be a godsend. The Gibbons years were the golden age of Democratic politics.”

Democrats had assembled a campaign fund in six figures to aid a comeback attempt by Gibbons. “But it was the same old story,” said Democratic state chair Roberta Lange. “We can never compete with Republican money. As much as we were able to raise for Gov. Gibbons’ campaign, the Republicans were able to raise more to keep him out.”

—Sy Bryan

Prior to being filled with water, the Sparks Marina was known as Helm’s Pit. Brandybuck says that new evidence suggests that Helm’s Pit was previously known as Helm’s Deep, a stronghold of the Rohan, an ancient tribe of horsemen.

According to Dr. Brandybuck, some time around 3019 of the Third Age of the Sun, the era commonly known as Middle Earth of the Tolkienite epoch, Helm’s Deep was the site of a historically significant battle between the wizard Saruman’s Uruk-hai forces and group of men led by King Theoden of the Rohan. The outcome of the battle looked bleak for the humans until the wizard Gandalf arrived with reinforcements at first light on the third day.

Brandybuck says there were also some elves and perhaps even a dwarf or two fighting alongside the men. However, she said, contrary to some accounts of the battle, no elves used a shield to skateboard down a flight of stairs while shooting arrows.

“That would be ridiculous,” said Dr. Brandybuck.

—Brad Aghast the Brown

corrections Because our aim is accurately

In last week’s feature story, “Bigfoot seen eating sandwich in downtown Reno,” we misidentified Batboy as Bigfoot. Additionally, he was eating a burrito, not a sandwich. And our correspondent misidentified Gerlach as downtown Reno.

In last week’s horoscopes, our astrologist, Rube Breathy, incorrectly predicted that all Scorpios would die this week.

We apologize for any confusion or preemptive suicides this might have caused.

In last week’s Green column, our environmental correspondent, Parsley Sage Lazy, incorrectly identified coyote dung as an edible plant. Ω

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struggle to remember passwords I use every day, and I often have the experience of walking into a room and forgetting why I’m there. But I could tell you what I wore the day I got my braces off at age 16. And the starting music for the Pac-Man video game? Stuck like glue in my head.

It’s this trick of memory, particularly concerning video games, that prompted Kevin Fredericks and Clark Harrell of the Reno Video Game Symphony to develop an original piece of theater last spring.

Almost a year later, their idea has become The Memory Card, an original play currently in production by Reno’s Goodluck Macbeth Theatre Company.

An original play, The Memory Card, merges video games with live theater at Goodluck Macbeth Theatre

16 | RN&R |

MARCH 27, 2014

Photo/Eric Marks

Paige Nelson plays Seraphine, the central character of The Memory Card

“Video games are at this really nice time now,” says Fredericks, who heads up the Reno Video Game Symphony, an orchestra comprised of musicians from around Northern Nevada who play interpretations of video game music (and who have, on occasion, composed music for games). “They’re a pretty new art form compared to other art forms.

If you ask people about video games, they’ll say that they’ve been leaving impressions on people at some of the most crucial times in their lives. My earliest memories of games are from the early ’80s, and that’s really important for my identity, and for lots of people’s identities. They have their whole sense of self and their experiences wrapped up in video games.”

Questions about these early memories come up frequently in the RVG Symphony podcast that Fredericks hosts. During one interview, RVGS musician Rika Eveland provided the seed for what would become The Memory Card.

“She shared that for one game that she had loved as a kid, she saved each stage of the game, particular points in the story, that she never erased, because she never wanted to lose that point in the game,” says Fredericks. “It’s like a decade-old memory card that she has now.”

That tie between video games and memory provided the hook that captured the attention of Goodluck Macbeth’s producing artistic director, Chad Sweet.

“Two things really sold me on it,” Sweet recalls. “First was the passion, the sheer joy with which he expressed the idea, and second, the knowledge of this whole community, gamers, that I’m not

a part of, who could certainly be served by some other mode of expression and become audience members.”

And this idea of memory wrapped up in video games struck a chord with him.

“It was an interesting concept because theater is storytelling, a way to pass down memories and communicate trans-generationally,” Sweet says. “Now it’s not so much an oral expression of memory and storytelling, but we have cartridges and chips passing on these experiences. And now my children could play the exact same video games I played at their age.”

With only this broad theme and buy-in from a theater company, there still remained the most difficult task: writing a story and bringing it to life. Fredericks and another RVGS member, Clark Harrell, developed an outline, presented it to Sweet, and from there—with Sweet’s feedback and theatrical insights—the writing and rewriting took place over several months.

“One thing I never heard Chad say was, ‘That’s impossible,’” Fredericks says. “So we kept producing content just to see what we could do, working from infinite boundaries and then narrowing in.”

With aspects that Fredericks says are “somewhere between science and fantasy,” The Memory Card is the story of 12-year-old Seraphine (played by Paige Nelson), who is dealing with the onset of epilepsy and her increasing estrangement from family and friends. Using the handle “Fireball,” she retreats into video games, which give her a sense of control and empowerment she can have nowhere else. In many ways similar to literary icons Dorothy Gale or Lewis Carroll’s Alice, Fireball is pulled into another world, Paramesia, from which all video games originate.

Paramesia is governed by three councilors: Baal 2 (Logan Strand), the imaginer whose realm is the future and who conceives games; Chubulu (Emilie Mardock), who governs the past, taking our experiences from playing games and storing them; and Faxanadu (Derek Miller), who represents the present and is the conduit through which Paramesia can collect memories from our world. But as Fireball arrives, she learns that Paramesia’s Omega, where it stores memories, has exploded. She’s convinced that her purpose is to discover why and fix it.

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An additional layer of complexity is that, in Paramesia, time is not linear.

“The setting is meant to wrap around the idea of time, and how everyone’s sense of time is relevant to their own experience,” says Fredericks. “That’s an important component. Giving each character a world where their personal timelines are isolated from others’ is like people’s experience playing video games. You can save who you were and where you were at each stage.”

Certainly, multimedia elements were essential. Video projection plays a crucial role—one character is entirely video-based—as does lighting, which was designed by cast member Derek Miller and local lighting specialist Kent Vizina. Add to that an original score written by Harrell and played, interestingly enough, through a Super Nintendo chip for the authentic video game sound so dear to Fredericks’ and Harrell’s hearts. Music, they felt, played a key role, almost as if it were a character.

“It was fun finding the moments in the show that demand music because in games that’s more than half the experience,” says Fredericks, explaining that there’s a natural tension that always exists between the music and what’s actually happening in the game.

“Games challenge you, so they frustrate you naturally … But they’re severely split because the music is always happy, even while you’re totally frustrated and bad things are happening. So we needed to find emotionally painful moments in the play that show that dichotomy.”

Costumes, Sweet says, are a cross between traditional, ancient garb (loin cloths, flowing robes) and a Tron-like vibe, thanks to designs by nationally renowned cosplay costumer Melissa Hoppe.

Fredericks and Sweet predict the show will see a few iterations before they consider it finished.

They expect the audience response will help them see it through new eyes and tweak as needed.

“As a producer, I feel like the only failure I can have here is if it doesn’t get produced again,” says Sweet. Ω

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Think Free

The Memory Card, a new work by Goodluck Macbeth and Reno Video Game Symphony, written

by Kevin Fredericks, Clark Harrell and Chad Sweet is at the Goodluck Macbeth Theatre Company, 713 S. Virginia St., on March 27, 28, 29 and April 4, 5, 11, 12, 18, 19 at 7:30 p.m., and March 30 and April 6 at 3 p.m. For tickets or more information, visit www.goodluckmacbeth.org or call 322-3716.

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Draw a blank

“We’re always asking ourselves, ‘Is this it?’” says Art Inside Me founder Sharon DeMattia.

Art Inside Me Art Inside Me founder Sharon DeMattia believes that delving into the nitty gritty of identity starts by with a blank canvas. And that’s what the Art Ashley Inside Me, which DeMattia is registering as Hennefer a non-profit, seeks to accomplish.

It works like this. Participants in an Art Inside Me event receive a large piece of paper, on which a simple outline of a head and shoulder is sketched (by DeMattia herself, who draws all of the outlines by hand). On the right side of the chest, a red heart is drawn, so that when the artist holds for more information, up their canvas to show another person, the visit www.artinsideme. heart is right in front of their own. Artists com. are given colored markers and can fill in their canvas the best way they see fit, emphasizing their strengths, weaknesses, hopes and fears. DeMattia will begin an event by walking artists through the process, but essentially, anything goes. Some choose to write words in decorative typography, while others focus on color and imagery.

It’s an activity that borders on art therapy, but is much more about “self-expression,” says DeMattia.

The image of a blank piece of paper with an outline waiting to be filled in is effective and powerful.

“Even just looking at it, you know where to begin,” she says. “Most people’s question throughout life is, ‘Where do I start?’”

The concept for Art Inside Me began in Dec. 2012. After a period of hardship—a divorce and a lay-off from her job—DeMattia realized that she needed to keep herself in check with her lifelong goals. She has two young sons and found herself tackling financial and emotional stress. DeMattia is a researcher by trade, and delved into the data that explored why people grow up to feel unsatisfied, anxious and insecure. From here, she realized that there was plenty of evidence to support an endeavor that she eventually could turn into her livelihood.

She cites publications like Forbes and Harvard Business Review. “These organizations say that creativity is the number one job skill for the future. Adults often say they aren’t creative. But if you give a kid a

marker, they don’t think like that. So I want to try to protect that if it’s not gone yet.”

After coming up with the idea, “things began to move quickly.” A pilot event was held at the Livingthebliss women’s grief workshop last summer (“Miss bliss,” June 6, 2013) and was well-received.

DeMattia has conducted Art Inside Me workshops, some more structured than others, with several demographics—adult men, adult women, teens and children. She says that adult men are often the hardest to open up but eventually find value in the project. She loves working with children because she can help preserve that sense of potential that’s often pushed aside when kids grow up.

She’s also used the project as a selfreflection activity for those dealing with difficult life circumstances, including the homeless people near the Truckee River,

who were very receptive to the activity and enjoyed the chance to open up and share their life stories.

“We brought them food, coffee and doughnuts,” she says. “Everyone just wants to be heard.

Everyone just wants to love and belong.”

DeMattia has also worked with pregnant youth at Casa de Vida and breast cancer survivors, as well as local elementary schools. The most effective part of the process, she says, is when each person shares their portrait. Participants are instructed to exchange their portrait with another person, and must trust that person to take care of it. The image becomes personified, and she notes that people become protective over their own and are more careful with others. She also photographs people with their portraits but purposely hides their face to let their art speak for itself. “[The portraits] unlock hidden conversations,” she says. “You allow yourself to be imperfect. It’s a beautiful way to get Ω unstuck.”

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Merry melodies Homage Bakery 519 Ralston St., 323-8952

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To play the oboe, you must have perfect pitch, discipline, concentration and a passion for music. Trained as a classical musiby Dave Preston cian, Nicholle Alumbaugh opened her bakery in December 2011, and has been able to make a symphony of classical, nouveau, and original delight with discipline, concentration and passion.

Alumbaugh has always enjoyed the kitchen and spent time at the Siena, the IGT bakery, Charlie Palmers as a sous chef and even a seasonal chefing adventure to Alaska. She was about to head off to Chicago to make her fame and fortune but “something just felt right about this” and with heirloom recipes from family and friends the house on Ralston a block southwest of St. Mary’s Hospital became a “tribute” to creations of flavors.

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concerts, competitions & clinics!

Thursday, April 10 Trumpeter Avishai Cohen with The Collective 7:30 p.m., Nightingale Concert Hall

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jazz@unr.edu www.unr.edu/rjf 20 | RN&R |

MARCH 27, 2014

Barista Jack Sullivan prepares a latte at Homage Bakery.

Be a jazz volunteer!

Funded in part by a grant from the Nevada Arts Council, a state agency,; the National Endowment for the Arts, a federal agency; and the City of Reno.

For more information, visit www.homage bakery.com.

Her compositions began with 100-percent-from-scratch small batch fine pastries and espresso. The repertoire has moved to 49 varieties of cream, meringue, chiffon and fruit pies; cakes referred to as “entremets” (serves 6 to 10, $42) that have names like Mogador, 24-Karat, Chanel and Cherise. These plaisirs célestes have ingredients like passion fruit gelee, cassis mousse, espresso-soaked vanilla cake and caramel corn.

Lunch is a new amenity at Homage. I had an opus: sprouted mung bean salad ($11) filled with snap peas, shaved carrots, radish, cabbage, celery, red peppers and cucumber with a honey-ginger vinaigrette. Mung

beans are light yellow in color native to the Indian subcontinent about the size of a young sweet peas and have a fairly dense structure. Healthy, crunchy, earthy fiber with a nice hint of sweet ginger—a vegan delight Then, I had a black bean burger ($12), with sprouts, pickled onions, avocado, yellow pepper, ketchup, cilantro, and lime on a house-made Kaiser roll. This was a fugue worthy of Bach, a big composition in flavor.

The reoccurring flavor of the bean married with so many other tastes and texture and the crescendo of the sauce created the perfect chord—music in my mouth. The ginger pumpkin soup ($3), with rich, distinct orange gourd flavor and a ginger accent, ended this movement gracefully.

The second movement of this food symphony came as Croque Madame ($12), a waffle made from croissant dough, Black Forest ham, Swiss cheese with an egg sunny-side up and a Mornay sauce—simple but fortissimo in flavor.

I had two encores. The first was a strawberry-basil pot de créme ($5), a loose French dessert custard dating to the 17th century. It was sweet and creamy, with fresh-cut berries and the accent of the basil gave it a minty, almost aromatic finish, something I wasn’t expecting, but it created a “wow” factor.

Encore two was a lemon posset ($3.25), which refers to an old English drink similar to a simple pudding.

This was rich and just tart enough, with lemon notes that left my taste buds satisfied and not puckered.

Homage offers a lot of esoteric, cool craft beers ($3.75-$18) and British ciders ($10). And there’s a boutique wine list ($27-$42) from a classy boutique distributor, Vin Cepage, including white, reds and dessert quaffs by-the-glass ($9-$15).

They offer a full cadre of teas and coffees ($2-$4.50) with beans from the award-winning Portland Roasting Company.

Lunch ($9-$15) is served 11 a.m. to 2 p.m. There’s catering, online ordering, and even an app for iPhones. Alumbaugh’s inspiration for this bakery is her love of life, baking and cooking for friends, old and new, producing beautiful food and pastry. Her compositions are melodic artistry for the taste buds and her homage to food and life. Ω

© David Calvert

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“

The Reno Phil has become our favorite evening out. We look forward to future performances. Bravo!” ~ Karen Leinenkugel, January 2014

Classix Six

DIRK ARTHUR WILD MAGIC

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Sunday, April 6, 2014 4:00 PM

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3/11/14 9:16 AM

2

300: Rise of an Empire

Forever dumb Divergent Divergent, a super dud of a movie, had a lot going for it.

For starters, it’s based on a blockbuster series of teen targeted novels and that often means box office gold nowadays. It has a strong cast, including Kate Winslet and both Shailene Woodley and Miles Teller of The Spectacular Now. It also has a semi-reliable director in Neil Burger (Limitless, The by Illusionist).

Bob Grimm What it also has going for it is that it might be a great over-the-counter solution for insombgrimm@ newsre view.c om niacs. Forget those prescriptions for sleeping pills or overdosing on Nyquil when you don’t even have a runny nose. Divergent will put your ass to sleep.

Boring … BORE-ING!

1

“Nobody expects the Foot Clan!”

1 Poor

2 Fair

3 Good

4 Very Good

5 excellent

22 | RN&R |

Woodley stars as Beatrice, a member of an alleged post-apocalyptic society where people are divided up into factions: Abnegation (The Selfless), Erudite (The Intelligent), Amity (The island where Jaws was set … oh no, wait, I’m sorry … The Peaceful), Candor (The Honest) and Dauntless (The Brave).

Beatrice is set to become an adult, and part of becoming an adult is being tested for a faction to belong in, and then choosing a faction to join. She comes up as a Divergent, someone who can’t be classified by a faction, but she tells everybody she’s an Abnegate like her mom and dad (Ashley Judd and Tony Goldwyn). She then chooses to join Dauntless because she wants to run around and laugh and climb stuff.

Of course, she will have some trouble along the way, and be found out for what she really is: Unclassifiable. So what?

Winslet shows up as Jeanine, an Erudite with a mysterious whiff of evil. I imagine she’s the Darth Vader of this silly saga. Teller gets what feels like a tacked-on role as Peter, a member of Dauntless who gives Beatrice a hard time. It’s hard to watch these two very MARCH 27, 2014

talented performers slumming in such stereotypical, unexciting parts.

Does the movie have sad, yearning, doeeyed romance? You bet it does! Four (Theo James), a high-ranking member of Dauntless, sets eyes upon Tris—Beatrice changes her name so as to be cooler—and sparks fly. They can’t consummate just yet, because this is a tween romance, and all tween romances have the requisite brooding. They eventually find an excuse to show off their tattoos.

The whole enterprise is remarkably lacking in tension, humor, creativity, originality, pancakes and focus. It’s a muddled affair that looks downright bad at times. There’s one sequence, when Tris rides a zip line between abandoned Chicago skyscrapers, that actually had me interested. That sequence is only a few minutes long, and it represents the film’s one highlight.

Visually, the film lacks any real spark. It starts promisingly with a relatively cool flight over a decaying Chicago, but most of the movie involves drab tunnels, dull costuming and bad lighting. As for the staging of action sequences, Tris gets knives thrown at her face, and Berger manages to render the moment completely uninteresting.

This futuristic world, created by Veronica Roth in her novels, is lacking in cinematic distinction. It also seems to be a big middle finger toward the SATs. I’m curious to know what Roth scored on that particular test. Perhaps she’s bitter about mass categorical testing.

Maybe there’s some hope for the Divergent series. A new director is set to take over for Burger, although that director is the remarkably inconsistent Robert Schwentke, who directed Red, The Time Traveler’s Wife and the miserable R.I.P.D. Both the Harry Potter and Hunger Games franchises got off to false starts but found their footing. Heck, even Twilight almost got tolerable as it rolled along.

Divergent, unfortunately, gets filed alongside the likes of last year’s The Host for now.

It’s a tween wannabe franchise completely lacking teeth with a good central female star in the lead. I have faith that Woodley can pull this one out of the fire and make it worthwhile in future installments. I also have faith that I never want to see this flat first chapter again, unless I have a really bad cold and need something to knock me out. Ω

Director Noam Murro takes over the 300 franchise from Zack Snyder, who has a reduced role to co-writer and producer this time out. Murro’s take on the exposed belly ancient warrior thing lacks any kind of true dramatic tension. His film is a bunch of boat fights mixed with people in togas emoting slowly on soundstages. It’s a bit of a prequel to 300 in that we see the origins of Xerxes (Rodrigo Santoro), the golden god Persian warrior who gave Gerard Butler such a hard time in the last film. As far as storytelling goes, the Xerxes prologue is easily the most compelling part of the movie. Too bad it only accounts for a few minutes. The main plot involves Greek general Themistokles, played by Sullivan Stapleton. Stapleton is basically Gerard Butler with a slightly less impressive BMI. He’s basically tasked here with delivering a determined looking face and shouting a lot. In short, he’s been asked to do what Butler had to do in the last film, with perhaps a little less airbrushing on the abs. The main nemesis, besides Xerxes, would be Artemisia, played wickedly by Eva Green. Green makes for a memorable badass in a somewhat unmemorable film.

3

Frozen

I have to admit I was more into the strange Mickey Mouse short that precedes this musical adaptation of Hans Christian Anderson’s “The Snow Queen” than the actual feature. It features retro Mickey busting out of a black and white film and becoming 3-D as he battles a bad guy kidnapping Minnie. It’s worth the price of admission. As for the actual feature movie, Kristen Bell and Idina Menzel have wonderful voices, and the visuals are fun to behold in this middle-of-theroad Disney fare. It has a lot of music—some of it quite good, some of it, well, not—and a beautiful look to it. For recent Disney animation, my vote goes to Tangled for best, but that’s not to say this one is a letdown. It’s OK. Just OK. It’s about on par with Pixar’s latest, Monster’s University. It’s fun to watch, but not altogether memorable.

4

The Lego Movie

Fast paced, frequently hilarious, and visually fun, this is the sort of movie we’ve come to expect from Pixar, one that appeals to both kids and adults on many levels.

It’s also notable that it isn’t a Pixar film, but a product of the still formidable but inconsistent Warner Brothers animation wing. The plot follows Emmet (Chris Pratt), a “generic” builder as he goes about his homogenized life, building structures under strict deadlines, listening to the same song (Tegan and Sara’s terrific “Everything is Awesome”) every minute of the day, and following the rules of the omnipotent President Business (Will Ferrell). President Business demands conformity in a decidedly socialistic way, but he keeps everybody at bay by promising Taco Tuesdays. Things change instantly when Emmet meets Wyldstyle (Elizabeth Banks), who reveals to Emmet that he’s living in a pre-programmed world, and there’s the possibility for real life beyond its walls (echoes of The Matrix and Terry Gilliam’s Brazil). Emmet joins forces with Wyldstyle and her extremely cool boyfriend, Batman (Arnett) to take down the establishment and restore freewill. The Lego Movie is a bit exhausting at times, but at least the constant stream of activity is laced with super intelligence rather than bombastic, vapid visuals.

3

The Monuments Men

Director George Clooney’s war epic about historians racing to save art from the Nazis looks and feels like it was just taken out of a time capsule buried in 1958. It’s quite breezy for a war movie, peppered with laughs provided by a strong cast including Clooney, Matt Damon, Bill Murray, Jean Dujardin, Bob Balaban and John Goodman as men trying to thwart Hitler’s plan for a giant museum. It has one of those whistle-infused soundtracks, and it doesn’t hurt that Clooney and Dujardin look like Errol Flynn and Gene Kelly. The movie moves briskly, and is perhaps a bit too weightless for a movie of such heavy subject matter.

It also has a useless subplot involving Damon and Cate Blanchett. Still, Clooney has great command of the camera here, the ensemble (especially Murray and Goodman) shines, and it’s fun to watch. This is an interesting piece of World War II history, and it’s good that somebody has made a decent movie to cover this chapter of Hitler insanity.

1

Need for Speed

Aaron Paul, of Breaking Bad fame, takes his first post-Bad big step into the limelight as a lead actor in Need for Speed, a big screen adaptation of the popular video game series. Paul is a good actor, but he’s miscast here as Tobey Marshall, a street racer looking for revenge after doing time for a crime he didn’t commit. Actually, for a crime he sort of didn’t commit. Wait … now that I’m actually writing about this, I’m realizing the he’s pretty much guilty of the crime even though the movie tries to pass him off as innocent. Man, this movie is stupid as all hell. Tobey has an auto mechanic shop that tries to do big racecar jobs. He also moonlights as a street racer, one of those jackasses who blaze around in hot rods on public streets endangering the lives of other drivers and pedestrians. See, the basic problem with a film like this is that the central, supposed hero is a big moron. It’s hard to get behind a character with such a reckless disregard for others, whose joyriding causes major catastrophes while he cackles with glee because he’s going really, really fast in a really, really neat car. Paul’s attempt to become the new Vin Diesel or Nicolas Cage falls flat. Need for Speed might look cool during some of the race scenes, but it stalls out when anybody opens their mouths and tries to emote.

3

Non-Stop

Liam Neeson plays Bill Marks, an alcoholic US Air Marshal doing a gig on a transatlantic flight … A TRANSATLANTIC FLIGHT THAT IS GOING TO BE TAKEN!!! Shortly after taking a drink and boarding the plane, Marks starts getting texts on his secure network informing him that people on the plane will die unless a lot of money is handed over. The twist is that the hijacker tormenting Marks eventually makes it look like Marks is the one hijacking the plane. The movie has a screw loose, but somehow manages to be stupid fun thanks to Neeson’s stalwart presence and a mystery that does a good job keeping viewers in the dark. Julianne Moore delivers good supporting work as the understanding passenger who is there to help … OR IS SHE? Again, the film has a pretty good mystery at its core, and that makes it a lot of fun even if it is dumber than a bag of hammers.

4

Tim’s Vermeer

Penn Jillette produces and narrates, while his partner Teller directs this documentary about Tim Jenison and his obsession with Dutch artist Johannes Vermeer. Vermeer painted with a photographic eye, which has led some to speculate he must’ve used mirrors and reflections to create his works. Jenison, a self-made millionaire, inventor and professed non-painter, sets about painting his own Vermeer using a mirror contraption he concocts. The results are stunning, indeed, and it appears that those who thought Vermeer used some sort of engineering trickery to create his art might’ve been correct. Is Jenison’s painting better than Vermeer? No. Is it pretty damn good for a guy who claims to have never picked up a brush before? Hell yeah. Teller’s film might be a little dull in composition, but its subject is quite the nut, making this a fascinating watch.

3

Veronica Mars

Thanks to an already legendary Kickstarter campaign, fans of the Veronica Mars TV show get to see their hero, the title character played by Kristen Bell, back in action. The movie doesn’t really feel like a movie at all. It looks, smells and tastes like a TV show, with a hokey and half-baked plot to go with it.

Veronica has moved to New York and is about to get a job at a law firm when old boyfriend Logan (Jason Dohring) gets into trouble. He’s the focus of a murder investigation, so Veronica puts her private investigator cap back on, leaves her boyfriend behind, and comes to Logan’s rescue back home, while also attending her high school reunion. It’s all pretty lame, but Bell is a winning movie star when she’s on her game, as she is in this film. While the murder mystery is a super dud, the cameos in the movie (James Franco, Dax Shepard, Justin Long) are fun, and the old cast getting back together has a nice feel to it. The movie won’t knock anybody’s socks off, but it will satisfy fans and perhaps inspire a few to check out the TV show, which went off the air seven years ago. (Available for rent on iTunes, VOD and Amazon.com during limited theatrical run.)

In the loop Up is the Down is The Many fans of Northern Nevada music are probably familiar with singer, songwriter and multi-instrumentalist by Brad Bynum Andrew Martin from his work in the long-running folk rock band Buster bradb@ Blue, a perennial favorite group newsre view.c om among local music fans.

But Martin left Buster Blue in December—on amicable terms.

“I love those guys,” Martin said of his former bandmates. “I still see them all the time.”

He left the group to focus on his education. He’s finishing up a degree in music education that he put on hold a few years ago so that he could focus on touring and recording with Buster Blue. He also now works as a substitute teacher, focused primarily on filling in for music teachers in Washoe and Douglas counties. (He’s originally from Gardnerville.)

Photo/Brad Bynum

Apple-type proportions is an entire verse from “Bows and Arrows,” one of the songs on the EP. Martin recorded all the instruments on the album except for some percussion by Buster Blue drummer, and occasional RN&R contributor, Fil Corbitt.

“I did it all in my secret studio, which is my garage,” said Martin.

He says his recent focus on music education has been a positive influence.

“It’s been a really good toward my view on music and songwriting, getting to see different levels of students’ perspective on things,” he says. “Some of them knew I was in a band and had seen me at shows, which is kind of weird.”

Martin also partially attributes his versatility as an instrumentalist to his teaching experiences. He’s equally comfortable playing guitar, piano, trombone and just about any other instrument.

“I think that comes from being immersed in the teaching world,” he says. “Being a music teacher, I’ve had to learn so many instruments. If you’re working in a classroom, maybe a percussionist is having trouble so you have to help them, so you have to know that stuff. … When you have the theory, you can apply it to what you’re doing, you can play anything.”

He’s thrilled by performing solo— building songs live with a guitar, looping pedals and minimal percussion, including a floor tom and a bucket that functions as a snare drum. He changes the approach for each song.

“What I didn’t want to do at all was have every song have the same basis—you know, ‘I have to set up this percussion thing, and then I’m going to play a song over it.’ It’s, ‘I’m going to play this next song, and there may be percussion on it. It may be just vocals.’”

Because he records new loops live onstage, rather than reusing the same backing tracks, every performance is a little different—with slight variations in tempo or emphasis. This approach means he has to think as a recording engineer, a musician, a vocal performer and a songwriter all at once during every song.

“Being in a band is awesome, but performing by yourself and having this kind of equipment, you can chose to arrange everything however you want,” he said. “You can play songs completely different and chose to do that on the spot.” Ω

And he’d been writing songs that didn’t quite fit with the old-timey moonshine energy of Buster Blue. He was writing songs with electric guitar parts, electronic loops, and complex, layered vocal textures.

So, he decided to launch a solo project called Up is the Down is The. It’s a solo project both in the studio and onstage, where Martin uses looping pedals to layer different parts.

He’ll record and loop percussion, backing vocals or rhythm guitar parts to accompany himself.

The somewhat convoluted name is a reference to the loop-oriented nature of the project since the name itself, Up is the Down is The, forms a loop: Up is the Down is the Up is the Down is the Up is the Down is The. He’s currently working on an electric guitar-oriented full-length, but he has already released an EP, titled An Arrow Shot from a Distance can Always Pierce the Skin, but Time, the Ever-Turning Wheel, Won’t Turn Back Again. That album title of Fiona

Backing tracks?

Andrew Martin of Up is the Down is The.

up is the down is the performs at holland Project, 140 Vesta St., with the Pageantry and Blunderbusst, on april 2 at 7:30 p.m.

For more information, and to hear up is the down is the, visit http://upisthedown isthe.bandcamp.com.

OPINION

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MARCH 27, 2014

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THURSDAY 3/27 3RD STREET 125 W. Third St., (775) 323-5005

5 STAR SALOON 132 West St., (775) 329-2878

THE ALLEY 906 Victorian Ave., Sparks; (775) 358-8891

G. Love & Special Sauce March 28, 9 p.m.

Grand Sierra Resort 2500 E. Second St. 789-2000

MONDAY-WEDNESDAY 3/31-4/2

9below0, 9:30pm, no cover

DG Kicks, 9pm, Tu, no cover DJ Ricky Rick, 10pm, Tu, no cover Karaoke, 10pm, W, no cover

One Car Funeral, 8pm, no cover

2 Feet Down Until I Come Up Show, 8:30pm, $8-$10

Guttermouth, Ten Cent Mistake, 8pm, $10-$12 Monday Night Open Mic, 8pm, M, no cover

816 Highway 40 West, Verdi; (775) 351-3206

CEOL IRISH PUB 538 S. Virginia St., (775) 329-5558

CHAPEL TAVERN 1099 S. Virginia St., (775) 324-2244

Pub Quiz Trivia Night, 8pm, no cover

Strange on the Range, 9pm, no cover

Sonic Mass w/DJ Tigerbunny, 7pm, no cover

Good Friday with rotating DJs, 10pm, no cover

COTTONWOOD RESTAURANT & BAR 10142 Rue Hilltop, Truckee; (530) 587-5711

Catch a Rising Star, Silver Legacy, 407 N. Virginia St., 329-4777: Ivan Pecel, Th, Su, 7:30pm, $15.95; F, 7:30pm, 10pm, $15.95; Sa, 7:30pm, 10pm, $17.95; Bil Dwyer, Tu-W, 7:30pm, $15.95

FUEGO

275 E. Fourth St., (775) 324-1917

Neil O’Kane, 9pm, no cover

Drum Circle hosted by Lightfeather, 6pm, no cover

312 S. Carson St., Carson City; (775) 883-2662

DAVIDSON’S DISTILLERY

Reno-Tahoe Comedy at Pioneer Underground, 100 S. Virginia St., 686-6600: Dan Kimm: Hypnot!c’s Greatest Hits, F, 7pm, $14, $17; Amy Ashton, F, 9:30pm, Sa, 6:30pm, 9:30pm, $14, $17

SUNDAY 3/30

BAR-M-BAR

3rd Street, 125 W. Third St., 323-5005: Comedy Night & Improv w/Patrick Shillito, W, 9pm, no cover

The Improv at Harveys Cabaret, Harveys Lake Tahoe, Stateline, (800) 553-1022: Tommy Savitt, Maureen Langan, Th-F, Su, 9pm, $25; Sa, 8pm, 10pm, $30; Rachel Feinstein, Don McEnery, W, 9pm, $25

SATURDAY 3/29

Karaoke, 10pm, no cover

COMMA COFFEE

Comedy

FRIDAY 3/28

Blues jam w/Blue Haven, 9:30pm, no cover

Paul Covarelli, 7pm, no cover

Tyler Stafford, 7pm, no cover

Open mic w/Frazzled, 9:30pm, no cover

9below0, 9:30pm, no cover

170 S. Virginia St., (775) 322-1800

GREAT BASIN BREWING CO. 846 Victorian Ave., Sparks; (775) 355-7711

Post show s online by registering at www.newsr eview.com /reno. Dea dline is the Friday befo re publication .

Jacked Up, 9:30pm, no cover

Traditional Irish Tune Session, 7pm, Tu, no cover

CW and Mr. Spoons, noon, M, no cover

The Ditchrunners, 8pm, no cover

Hellbilly Hoedown, 7pm, M, no cover

Live flamenco guitar music, 5:30pm, no cover Arnold Mitchem, 8pm, no cover

Paisley Brain Cells, 8:30pm, no cover

HARRY’S SPORTS BAR & GRILL

DJ and karaoke, 9pm, no cover

1100 E. Plumb Ln., (775) 828-7665

Open mic, 7pm, no cover

HIMMEL HAUS

Open Mic Night, 9pm, M, no cover Trivia Night, 9pm, W, no cover

3819 Saddle Rd., South Lake Tahoe; (530) 314-7665

THE HOLLAND PROJECT 140 Vesta St., (775) 742-1858

Cruel Hand, Alpha and Omega, Bent Life, Malfunction, Barrier, 7pm, $12

Pageantry, Blunderbusst, Up is the Down is The, 7:30pm, W, $5

JAVA JUNGLE

Outspoken: Open Mic Night, 7pm, M, no cover

246 W. First St., (775) 329-4484

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JAZZ, A LOUISIANA KITCHEN 1180 Scheels Dr., Sparks; (775) 657-8659

THURSDAY 3/27

FRIDAY 3/28

SATURDAY 3/29

Erika Paul, 6pm, no cover

First Take featuring Rick Metz, 6pm, no cover

Bill Davis, 6pm, no cover

2) Kevin Seconds, My Acoustic Heart, Chris Fox, Myke Read, 8pm, $5

2) Naked for Safety, Oliver Trolley, Squarecrow Ramona, Workin’ Minerva, 8pm, $5

JUB JUB’S THIRST PARLOR 71 S. Wells Ave., (775) 384-1652 1) Showroom 2) Bar Room

KNITTING FACTORY CONCERT HOUSE 211 N. Virginia St., (775) 323-5648

Drinking with Clowns, Mojo Green, Bazooka Zoo, Tony Walker, 7pm, $5

SUNDAY 3/30

MONDAY-WEDNESDAY 3/31-4/2

1) Band Roulette, 8pm, no cover 2) Wheatstone Bridge, Sit Kitty Sit, Stabby Unicorn, 8pm, $5

2) Ninja Slaughterhouse, Western Settings, Success, Infecto Skeletons, 7:30pm, W, $3 Mad Caddies, Mrs. Skannotto, Sucka Punch, The Deadly Gallows, 7pm, W, $12-$15

Problem, Iamsu, 8pm, $27

POLO LOUNGE

Live music, 9pm, no cover

1559 S. Virginia St., (775) 322-8864

Live music, 9pm, no cover

RED DOG SALOON

Guttermouth March 29, 8 p.m.

The Alley 906 Victorian Ave. Sparks 358-8891

Open Mic Night, 7pm, W, no cover

76 N. C St., Virginia City; (775) 847-7474

RUBEN’S CANTINA

Karaoke, 8pm, no cover

1483 E. Fourth St., (775) 622-9424

Hip Hop Open Mic, 10pm, W, no cover

RYAN’S SALOON 924 S. Wells Ave., (775) 323-4142

SIDELINES BAR & NIGHTCLUB 1237 Baring Blvd., Sparks; (775) 355-1030

SIERRA TAP HOUSE

Karaoke, 9pm, no cover

Live jazz, 7:30pm, W, no cover

Alias Smith, 9:30pm, no cover

Open Jam with Tazer and Friends, 8pm, W, no cover

Mad Caddies

Wanders On, 9pm, no cover

252 W. First St., (775) 322-7678

ST. JAMES INFIRMARY

Strange on the Range, 7pm, M, no cover Tuesday Night Trivia, 8pm, Tu, no cover

Dance party, 9pm, no cover

445 California Ave., (775) 657-8484

STUDIO ON 4TH

Dylan Jakobsen, Levi Maddox, Frankie Robert, 8pm, $10

432 E. Fourth St., (775) 410-5993

April 2, 7 p.m.

Knitting Factory 211 N. Virginia St. 323-5648

Open Mic Wednesdays, 7pm, W, no cover

WILD RIVER GRILLE

Sunday Jazz, 2pm, no cover

17 S. Virginia St., (775) 284-7455

WILDFLOWER VILLAGE

Reno Music Project Open Mic, 6:30pm, no cover

4275-4395 W. Fourth St., (775) 787-3769

Wildflower Comedy Power Hour Open Mic, 8:30pm, Tu, no cover

ONE ON E CA CAR AR PILE PIILE P LE U UP P

Thursday, Thur Th ursday sd day, March Ma h 27

Last L ast T To o Leave, Le Leave, Heart Heartt Of The Hills, Hills, Frankly Fictitious

2 FEET FEET FE E D DOWN HIP HOP SHO SHOW OW

Friday, F Fr iday, March 28 id

Too Much, M ch Mu ch, c h, Turf Turf Talk, Smokey The Ghost, Gh host, Traj Ya H Hemii + M Many M More!!

T j Hardie, H di Y

GUTTERMOUTH

Saturday, March 29

Machine Gun Vendetta, Ten Cent Mistake, Falcon A!, And United Defiance

WRATH OF VESUVIOUS

Thursday, April 3

Fall City Fall, The Jet Stole Home, Drag Me Under, +TBA

THE FLESHAMMERS

Friday, April 4

THESE DON’T MIX

Lucabrazzi, Cranium, Part Of The Problem

RIPCHAIN

Saturday, April 5

Pain Clinic, Toy Called God, Smoke Filled Skies, We Came To Conquer

CHUCK RAGAN

Sunday, April 6

W/ Johnny Two Bags (Social Distortion) Plus Six Mile Station

TICKETS ON SALE NOW:

Mar. 29 Guttermouth April 5 TOY CALLED GOD + RIPCHAIN April 6 CHUCK RAGAN April 12 ABK + Big Hoodoo April 23 FAREWELL MY LOVE April 25 Kung Fu Vampire + Dirtbag Dan April 27 ANVIL

Think you know your limits?

Think again.

If you drink, don’t drive.

PerIod.

TheAlleySparks.com (775) 358.8891 906 Victorian Ave, Sparks NV Facebook.TheAlleySparks.com

OPINION

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FEATURE STORY

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ARTS&CULTURE

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IN ROTATION

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ART OF THE STATE

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FOODFINDS

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MUSICBEAT

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NIGHTCLUBS/CASINOS

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THIS WEEK

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MISCELLANY

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MARCH 27, 2014

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RN&R

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25

THURSDAY 3/27

FRIDAY 3/28

SATURDAY 3/29

SUNDAY 3/30

MONDAY-WEDNESDAY 3/31-4/2

2) Atomika, 8pm, no cover

2) Atomika, 4pm, Cook Book, 10pm, no cover

2) Atomika, 4pm, Cook Book, 10pm, no cover

2) Cook Book, 8pm, no cover

2) Escalade, 8pm, M, Tu, W, no cover

2) Stew Stewart, 8pm, 10pm, no cover

1) T.G. Sheppard, 7pm, $22 2) Stew Stewart, 8pm, 10pm, no cover

2) Stew Stewart, 8pm, 10pm, no cover

2) Michael Furlong, 6pm, no cover

2) Michael Furlong, 6pm, M, Tu, W, no cover

1) Leftover Salmon, Billy Payne, California Honeydrops, 9pm, $27-$30

1) Leftover Salmon, Billy Payne, California Honeydrops, 9pm, $27-$30

1) Ring of Fire, 8pm, $24.95+ 2) Garage Boys, 10:30pm, no cover 3) Skyy High Fridays, 10pm, $10 5) Tany Jane, 10pm, no cover

1) Ring of Fire, 7pm, 9:30pm, $24.95+ 2) Garage Boys, 10:30pm, no cover 3) Four Play Saturdays, 10pm, $10 5) Tany Jane, 10pm, no cover

1) Ring of Fire, 7pm, $24.95+ 2) Garage Boys, 10:30pm, no cover 4) Live piano, jazz, 4:30pm, no cover

1) Ring of Fire, 7pm, Tu, W, $24.95+ 2) Live Band Karaoke, 10pm, M, DJ Chris English, 10pm, Tu, Cash Presley, 10:30pm, W, no cover

1) G. Love & Special Sauce, Ethan Tucker, 9pm, $27.50-$33

1) Widespread Panic, 8pm, $49.50

15 Hwy. 50, Stateline; (775) 588-6611 1) South Shore Room 2) Peek Nightclub

2) DJ Romeo Reyes, 10:30pm, $20

2) Rick Gee, DJ SN1, 10pm, $20

HARRAH’S RENO

1) Dirk Arthur’s Wild Magic, 8pm, $17.20-$47.20 2) DJ I, 8pm, no cover 3) Barbara Baxter, 8pm, no cover

1) Dirk Arthur’s Wild Magic, 8pm, $17.20-$47.20 2) DJ I, 8pm, no cover

1) Dirk Arthur’s Wild Magic, 8pm, $17.20-$47.20

1) Dirk Arthur’s Wild Magic, 8pm, M, $17.20-$47.20

ATLANTIS CASINO RESORT SPA 3800 S. Virginia St., (775) 825-4700 1) Grand Ballroom Stage 2) Cabaret

CARSON VALLEY INN

1627 Hwy. 395, Minden; (775) 782-9711 1) Valley Ballroom 2) Cabaret Lounge

Emancipator Ensemble April 2, 10 p.m.

MontBleu Resort 55 Highway 50 Stateline (800) 648-3533

CRYSTAL BAY CLUB

14 Hwy. 28, Crystal Bay; (775) 833-6333 1) Crown Room 2) Red Room

ELDORADO HOTEL CASINO

345 N. Virginia St., (775) 786-5700 1) Showroom 2) Brew Brothers 3) BuBinga Lounge 4) Roxy’s Bar & Lounge 5) Stadium Bar

1) Ring of Fire, 7pm, $24.95+ 2) Garage Boys, 10:30pm, no cover 4) Live piano, jazz, 4:30pm, no cover

GRAND SIERRA RESORT

2500 E. Second St., (775) 789-2000 1) Grand Theater 2) WET Ultra Lounge

HARRAH’S LAKE TAHOE

Karaoke Elbow Room Bar, 2002 Victorian Ave., Sparks, 359-3526: Th, 7pm, no cover El Cortez Lounge, 235 W. Second St., 3244255: Daily, 9pm, no cover Hangar Bar, 10603 Stead Blvd., Stead, 677-7088: Karaoke Kat, Sa, 9pm, no cover Murphy’s Law Irish Pub, 180 W. Peckham Lane, Ste. 1070, 823-9977: Steve Starr Karaoke, F, 9pm, no cover Ponderosa Saloon, 106 South C St., Virginia City, 847-7210: Steel Rockin’ Karaoke, F, 7:30pm, no cover West Second Street Bar, 118 W. Second St., 384-7976: Daily, 8pm, no cover

1) Dirk Arthur’s Wild Magic, 219 N. Center St., (775) 788-2900 8pm, $17.20-$47.20 1) Sammy’s Showroom 2) The Zone 3) Sapphire Lounge 4) Plaza 5) Convention Center

JOHN ASCUAGA’S NUGGET

1) The Novelists CD release show, 8pm, $15-$20

1100 Nugget Ave., Sparks; (775) 356-3300 1) Showroom 2) Rose Ballroom 3) Cabaret

MONTBLEU RESORT

55 Hwy. 50, Stateline; (800) 648-3353 1) Theatre 2) Opal 3) Blu

PEPPERMILL RESORT SPA CASINO 2707 S. Virginia St., (775) 826-2121 1) Tuscany Ballroom 2) Terrace Lounge 3) Edge

1) Wild & Scenic Film Festival, 7pm, $10-$20

1) The Straits, 9pm, $35

1) Sweet Talk: A Delicious Electro-Cirque Kiss, 8:30pm, $20

2) Buster Blue, 7pm, no cover

2) Buster Blue, 8pm, no cover 3) DJ Chris English, DJ ((Fredie)), 10pm, $20

2) Buster Blue, 8pm, no cover 3) Rogue Saturdays, 10pm, $20

1) BANFF Mountain Film Festival, 7pm, M, $16-$20 3) Emancipator Ensemble, 10pm, W, $18-$20

SANDS REGENCY CASINO HOTEL 345 N. Arlington Ave., (775) 348-2200 1) 3rd Street Lounge 2) Poolside

SILVER LEGACY

407 N. Virginia St., (775) 325-7401 1) Grand Expo. Hall 2) Rum Bullions 3) Aura

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MARCH 27, 2014

1) Blue Haven, 7pm, W, no cover

3) University of Aura, 9pm, no cover

1) Aaron Lewis, 8pm, $55-$65 2) Big Bad Boogie Rock, 9pm, no cover 3) Fashion Friday, 7pm, no cover

1) The Mavericks, 8pm, $50-$60 2) Big Bad Boogie Rock, 9pm, no cover 3) Seduction Saturdays, 9pm, $5

2) Recovery Sundays, 10pm, no cover 3) Industry Night, 9pm, no cover

2) Gong Show Karaoke, 8pm, Tu, no cover

For a complete listing of this week’s events, visit newsreview.com/reno

Poetry Center Grand Opening Sierra Nevada College celebrates the opening of its new Poetry Center with a series of events on Friday, March 28, and Saturday, March 29. Poet Laureate of California Juan Filipe Herrera and award-winning poet Jane Hirshfield will read from their work starting at 5:30 p.m. on Friday. Saturday’s events include a poetry workshop with Hirshfield at 9 a.m., a high school poetry workshop led by four-time National Poetry Slam champion Patricia Smith at 1:30 p.m. and a poetry slam event hosted by Smith at 7 p.m. The grand opening celebration takes place at various campus venues at 999 Tahoe Blvd., Incline Village. Call 881-7511 or visit www.sierranevada.edu.

Dmitri Atapine and Hyeyeon Park Cellist Dmitri Atapine and pianist Hyeyeon Park celebrate their latest CD release with a recital featuring works from the recording and from their recent tour of Southern California. Some of the works included in the program will feature compositions

by Bridge, Barber, Jalbert and Rachmaninoff. The free show begins at 7:30 p.m. on Friday, March 28, at the Nightingale Concert Hall inside the Church fine Arts Building, 1335 N. Virginia St., at the University of Nevada, Reno. Call 784-4278 or visit www.unr.edu/arts.

Hair

B

The Novelists CD release show Local acoustic rock band The Novelists will celebrate the release of their album, Book One, with a concert on Saturday, March 29, at the Celebrity Showroom inside John Ascuaga’s Nugget, 1100 Nugget Ave., Sparks. The Siren Society and Tyler Stafford will also perform at the show, which begins at 8 p.m. Tickets are $15 in advance and $20 at the door. Call 356-3300 or visit www.janugget.com or www.facebook.com/thenovelists.

roadway Comes to Reno’s 2013-2014 season continues with the counterculture musical about a group of young Americans searching for peace and love in a turbulent time. This celebration of youth, freedom, peace and individuality will take audiences back to the tumultuous era of the 1960s through songs such as “Aquarius/Let the Sun Shine In,” “Good Morning Starshine,” and “Easy To Be Hard.” Performances of the Tony Award-winning Broadway revival are 8 p.m. on Friday, March 28, 2 p.m. and 8 p.m. on Saturday, March 29, and 2 p.m. and 7 p.m. on Sunday, March 30, at the Pioneer Center for the Performing Arts, 100 S. Virginia St. Tickets are $45-$75. Call 686-6600 or visit www.pioneercenter.com.

—Kelley Lang

OPINION

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The Good Life The Artist Co-op Gallery of Reno welcomes spring with paintings by member artists Tricia Poulos Leonard and Dan Wittemore. Poulos Leonard will feature a new series that was inspired while collecting wine bottles after a reception at the gallery. Painter/musician Dan Wittemore will show off his acrylic skills in works that take on a spiritual, musical quality. The month-long show kicks off on Tuesday, April 1. There will be an opening reception on Sunday, April 6, from 1 p.m. until 4 p.m. Work by guest artists Marge Means and Demetrice Dalton will also be on display through April 30. The gallery, 627 Mill St., is open daily from 11 a.m. until 4 p.m. Call 322-8896 or visit www.artistsco-opgalleryreno.com.

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THIS WEEK

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MISCELLANY

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MARCH 27, 2014

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Serf’s up

90 Auto Center Dr. • 852-4010

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My boyfriend works at a hardware store and can fix things, and in the past six months, his sister and her husband have asked him to install their new kitchen faucet, mend their fence, and assemble a lawnmower.

They’re lawyers and could afford a handyman. Instead, they feed him a crappy $15 meal, despite knowing we struggle to make ends meet. They do invite us to dinner parties, and he lived at their house rent-free for six months when he moved here for college. He generally isn’t a pushover but says, “You’re always supposed to help family.” I also think he enjoys helping them, but when your family has far more money than you, shouldn’t they be helping themselves? When I bring up their taking advantage of him, it always causes a fight because he won’t see my point of view.

When you’re invited to somebody’s home for dinner, good manners dictate that you bring something, but maybe a bottle of wine or a pie, not a shovel so you can dig the hole for their new septic tank: “Dinner will be served after a little light plumbing.”

The way you see it, unless a person’s relative is Jimmy Carter, he shouldn’t be inviting them over for an afternoon of home improvement. Well, that’s how it works in your boyfriend’s family. Their way isn’t wrong; it’s just different from your way. But perhaps because you’re focused on the tumbleweed blowing through your bank account, you’re succumbing to “confirmation bias,” our tendency to cling to information that confirms our beliefs and shove aside information that doesn’t, like how these

two previously “exploited” your boyfriend by letting him live rent-free at their place for six months. Chances are, this has more than paid for his occasional handymanning.

And while he’s got a way with a screwdriver, I would guess that if he had a legal issue, sis would help him and follow up with a hug instead of a bill.

The issue you should be worried about is tucked in at the end of your letter. It’s your style of conflict resolution, which appears to be, “There are two ways to see an issue, my way or my way.” This is a viable strategy if you’ve just mounted a successful military coup on a small Central American nation. It’s far less effective when you’re in a relationship with a man who is able to open doors and walk through them carrying boxes of his stuff.

Every relationship comes with unsolvable problems.

Identifying this as one of them should help you stop badgering your boyfriend to change, which will only change your feelings for each other from loving to resentful. You should also figure out the fears behind your stance. (Money worries? The worry that “family first” means he won’t be there for you?) Telling him your fears will allow him to listen and reassure you in a way he can’t when you’re nagging him to stop being there for people who matter to him. Ω

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by rob brezsny

ARIES (March 21-April 19): I have coined a

new word just for your horoscope this week.

It’s “zex,” short for “Zen sex.” Zex is a kind of sex in which your mind is at rest, empty of all thoughts. You breathe slowly and calmly, move slowly and calmly, grunt and moan slowly and calmly. You are completely detached from the sensual pleasure you are experiencing. You have no goals other than the intention to be free of all goals. Zex is the only variety of sex I recommend for you right now, Aries. April fool! I lied. Zex may be fine to practice at any other time, but not these days. The style of sex you need most is exuberant, unbridled, expansive and even zany.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): In Somalia,

there’s a law that forbids you from putting your used chewing gum on your nose and walking around in public. Fortunately, you don’t live there, so it’s fine if you want to do that. In fact, I encourage you to go right ahead. To do so would be right in alignment with the cosmic omens. April fool! I lied.

You should definitely not take yourself too seriously this week; you should look for opportunities to playfully lose your dignity and razz the status quo. But there are craftier ways to do that than by sticking gum on your nose.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Face Slap-

ping Tata Massage Boxing is a salon in San Francisco that provides an unusual beauty treatment: face slapping. The Thai masseuse named Tata claims to be improving your complexion as she smacks your cheeks and forehead with her hands. She also does “massage boxing,” in which she administers health-giving punches to your body with her fists. Is there a comparable service available where you live? I highly recommend it. April fool! I lied. Here’s the truth: You should be absolutely firm that you won’t tolerate whacks and wallops—including the psychological kind—even if they are supposedly good for you.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): Now would

be an excellent time to launch a new tradition or instigate a fresh trend or make a beautiful thing that will last for a thousand years. I’m talking about an amazing marvel or useful innovation or unique creation that will improve the lives of countless humans all over the planet for the next 40 generations.

April fool! I was exaggerating a bit. Producing something that will last a thousand years is too ambitious. How about if you simply launch a new tradition or instigate a fresh trend or create a beautiful thing that will last for the rest of your long life—an amazing marvel or useful innovation or unique creation that will continue to teach and amuse you all along the way?

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Your patron saint for

the next three months is surrealistic artist Salvador Dalí. Regard him as your muse and role model. In fact, you might want to spout some of his famous declarations as if they were your own. Start with these: 1. “The only difference between me and a madman is that I am not mad.” 2. “I do not take drugs. I am drugs.” 3. “Mistakes are almost always of a sacred nature.” 4. “Have no fear of perfection—you’ll never reach it.” April fool!

I lied. Dalí is your patron saint, role model and muse for only the next 14 days, not three months.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): You know how

90 Auto Center Dr.

Jesus could supposedly turn water into wine? Well, St. Brigit, a sixth-century Irish nun, was legendary for an even greater miracle. When visitors came to her monastery in Kildare, she changed her old bathwater into beer for them to drink. I think there’s a good chance you will develop that precise talent sometime soon. April fool! I kind of lied. You won’t really possess St. Brigit’s supernatural power. However, you will have an uncanny ability to make transmutations that are almost as dramatic as changing bathwater to beer.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): The band Rush

was inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame last May. Guitarist Alex Lifeson delivered an unusual acceptance speech. For the two minutes he spoke, he repeated one word endlessly: “blah.” “Blah-blah-blah,” he began. “Blah-blah-blah, blah-blah blah-

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blah.” Many hand gestures and shifting vocal inflections accompanied his rap, always in support of variations on “blah-blah.” This is the spirit you should bring to all of your important conversations in the coming week. April fool! I lied. In fact, the opposite is true. It’s crucial for you to speak very precisely and articulately in the coming week. Say exactly what you mean. Don’t rely on meaningless bullshit like “blah-blah.”

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): When a

human embryo begins to develop in the womb, the very first body part that appears is—can you guess?—the anus. This scientific fact led the witty commentators at QI’s website to declare that “Every human being starts out as an asshole.” They were making a joke, of course, hinting that every one of us has an unattractive quality or two that make us at least a little bit of a jerk. That’s the bad news, Scorpio. The good news is that you now have an unprecedented chance to transform the asshole aspects of your personality. April fool! I lied. You’re not an asshole, not even a little bit. But it is true that the coming weeks will be an excellent time to try to fix or at least modulate your least attractive qualities.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): To

be in strict compliance with cosmic necessity, you should attend a party every day in the coming week. Dance ecstatically, make love abundantly and expose yourself to previously unknown pleasures. Feast on a wide variety of food and drink that introduces you to novel tastes. Make sure you experience record levels of sensual enjoyment, nonstop excitement and dynamic socializing.

April fool! I’m exaggerating, although just a little. Try doing a 70 percent version of what I advised.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Life-

hacker’s website has a step-by-step guide to set up your home as a command center where you can pursue your plans for world domination. The article provides advice on how to build a surveillance system, encrypt your computer files, and prepare for blackouts and weather emergencies. Do it, Capricorn! Get the lowdown at http://bit.ly/ secretlair. April fool! I lied. You don’t really need to create a high-tech fortress. But you would be wise to make your home into more of an ultra-comfortable, superinspiring sanctuary—a place where you feel so safe and strong and smart that you will always have total power over yourself, and never feel driven to fulfill anyone else’s standards of success but your own.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): The plan-

etary omens suggest that you need to experience all possible flavors of Doritos corn chips. Here’s the problem: The place where you live offers only a limited range. That’s why I urge you to drop everything and travel to Japan, which is the world leader in Dorito variety. There you can sample coconutcurry-flavored Doritos, along with fried chicken, corn soup, smoked bacon, tuna and mayonnaise, and many others. Buy your plane ticket now! April fool! I lied. The truth is you will benefit from communing with a wide variety of sensations and experiences and ideas in many areas of your life, not just Doritos.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): According to

a survey by Public Policy Polling, 4 percent of the population believes that “shapeshifting reptilian people control our world by taking on human form and gaining political power to manipulate our societies.” My own research suggests that 62 percent of those believers are Pisceans. Are you one? If so, now is a good time to intensify your fight against the shape-shifting reptilian people.

April fool! I lied. In fact, I strongly encourage you not to feed your paranoid delusions and fearful reveries. This should be a time when you bolster your positive fantasies, constructive visions and inspiring dreams.

Go to RealAstrology.com to check out Rob Brezsny’s expanded weekly audio horoscopes and daily text message horoscopes. The audio horoscopes are also available by phone at (877) 873-4888 or (900) 950-7700.

by Brad Bynum PHOTO/Brad Bynum

The mask Michelle Lassaline University of Nevada, Reno BFA artist Michelle Lassaline’s thesis exhibition Observations IV: Paintings and Masks is at the Southside Cultural Center, 190 E. Liberty St., March 31 through April 5, with a closing reception from noon to 2 p.m. on Saturday, April 5.

For more information, visit www.michellelassaline.com.

You’re primarily a sculptor?

There are sculptures and paintings. I’m doing both, and both will be in this show. I’ve got a brand new mask. It’s a surprise, and then four others, a goat, a fox, a crow and a cow.

Why masks?

I made this papier-mache fox for fun one summer, three years ago. It’s a papiermache fox on a balloon, because I remember making puppets on balloons as a kid, and then I thought, how cool would it be if I could wear it? This is probably because I’m really interested in childhood memories, going back to that time. I’m always really sad about not being 4 years old. For the rest of my life, I’ll be sad about not being 4 years old.

What about childhood is so nostalgic for you?

The things that I imagined were the most important and real. And then when we grow up, we have to do computers and fast-paced stuff—what everyone hates, I hate that, too.

The relation to my paintings is similar. It’s kind of a subtle connection. ... I look at things and

And you perform in the masks?

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In the past, I performed one-on-one with people, and it worked really well. Then I did a stage show, and when I got onstage, I forgot everything. I forgot my tap dance I’ve been practicing since I was 12. I forgot my story, which was about my dog. And I forgot how to play mandolin. I just got stage fright, even with the mask on. So I’m going back to what was more successful, which is one-on-one interactions with people. For the thesis show, I’ll be performing for six hours a day for five days, from 11 a.m. to 5 p.m. And every day is a different mask, and each day I’ll be doing something different in the gallery setting in the mask. When you come into the gallery, you can hear a story, get a gift. All you have to do is say “hello.”

think about a hike I took around the Tahoe Rim Trail last summer. I hiked the whole rim trail, and tried to look through that childlike point of view.

Do you classify your paintings as landscapes? What’s the media?

It’s watercolor and gouache on paper. These are landscapes, but I’m trying to take you into the landscape, not be a postcard. So it’s more like a first-person, direct experience. ... These are places you can remember— whether it’s from childhood or whenever, it’s a place where a memory happens. They’re my memories, but they could be anyone’s memories, because they don’t have any signifiers of anything too specific.

Do you adopt different personae for each animal?

Yes. Part of masks in primitive cultures and in what I do, is that it transforms the wearer into something different. It’s not really controllable. You just happen to have that persona. The goat happens to be kind of an awkward, klutzy, charming character that likes to come up to people and kiss their hands. And the fox loves to tell jokes, and she’s a little more sly. They’re all very folkloric animals that have a long history and relationship with humans. Ω

You mentioned a connection between the landscapes and the masks. Tell me about that.

There are a couple of layers. First of all, they’re all on paper, and the masks are also made of paper. That’s really important to me.

Paper is delicate. It’s an essential material

All the planes that stay up A footnote to my column last week about the gray whale experience in Baja California. To the few of you who will ever actually get down to Magdalena Bay to see momma grays and their new calves, I would ask one thing—don’t get all hung up about petting the whales.

It was just slightly weird and a bit ridiculous. How many of the whale-loving gringos we saw who seemed to be basing the quality of their whale encounter for the day on whether or not they got to actually put their hands on a baby whale. Look, this whole thing really shouldn’t be about touching the whales or not. Yes, it’s a thrill to touch one, sure, but it shouldn’t be the yardstick by which this experience is ultimately gauged. I mean, if you spend two hours in a small boat and you’re seeing 30-35-foot gray whales and you’re seeing them from 10-20 feet away, and they’re hangin’ with you, and you’re hangin’ with them, you are at that time having a completely bodacious and super

where you don’t need a lot of tools; you just need a lot of imagination. But underneath that, there’s a simplicity or a naiveté that I think is connected to childhood. They’re not scientific. I’m not researching, doing adult things in nature, like being an ecologist. I’m just observing direct experience, like walking around as a kid.

∫y Bruce Van Dye gizmos and GPS units and radar stations and satellites and remote cameras on traffic lights are out there, there’s still room for somebody to slip through the cracks and defy all the detectives and enter the realm of The Mysterious.

Then again, we do know some things. The plane ran out of gas. It hit the ocean. It exploded. Everybody died. The viperfish of the Indian Ocean that live a mile below the surface were the beneficiaries of a rain of limbs. And so it goes.

Can we learn anything at all from MA370? Only this—since that plane went down, thousands and thousands and thousands of passenger planes have taken off and landed without any problems. I’m constantly amazed and impressed that a culture as jet-happy as ours has so few disasters like MA370. Ω

deluxe whale watching encounter.

At that point, the fact that you did or didn’t put your hand on a whale should really be completely moot.

You’re 10 feet away from one of the great, fabulous beasts of the ocean!

And you’re going to live to tell the tale. Or, more accurately, bore all your drinking buds as you show them the damned pics on your phone while they slowly glaze over. Bingo, babe. You scored. 10 on a 10 scale.

It’s all good. Besides, all those grays, even the babies, are encrusted with thousands of barnacles, which aren’t all that fun to pet.

• Every once in a while, something very strange happens. Something strange like Malaysian Airlines flight 370. It now appears that this flight will forever be enshrouded in mystery, with no way of knowing what really happened. No way of knowing with any certainty, at least.

Some people find this unsettling.

Some find it rather thrilling. Thrilling in the sense of, no matter how many

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