Film

Pie another day

American Reunion

I generally don’t like the American Piefilms. I find them lazy and sloppy, with only occasional moments of genuine laughter to be had. They give R-rated comedy a bad name. American Reunion brings the gang back together 13 years after the so-so first film, and nine years after the totally abysmal American Wedding. I actually had big hopes for this one because it is directed by Jon Hurwitz and Hayden Schlossberg, writers on the Harold & Kumar series and directors of Harold & Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay (the weakest of that series, but still funny in a spotty sort of way). The result: a predictably tired comedy where Seann William Scott (Stifler) and Eugene Levy (Jim’s Dad) are responsible for most of the laughs. Seeing the likes of Scott, Levy, Chris Klein (Oz), and, to a certain extent, Jason Biggs (Jim) together again is kind of cool. Having to sit through line readings by Thomas Ian Nicholas (Kevin), Alyson Hannigan (Michelle), Tara Reid (Vicky) and Eddie Kaye Thomas (Finch)—not so much. There are lots of slo-mo, Michael Bayesque shots of the boys walking together throughout the film, like we’re supposed to get some sort of real charge out of this band of actors getting back together. I would get more of a charge seeing the cast of Idiocracy doing a big reunion movie rather than these guys. At least Idiocracy was really funny, and it had Terry Crews in it. The plot involves everybody coming home for their 13th high school reunion, with a major “Jim and Michelle ain’t having sex no more”

subplot. Oz has become a bubble-headed sportscaster, Finch a world traveler, Jim a sexstarved new dad, and Kevin a homebody husband with a new beard. (His beard is one of the better running jokes in the movie.) They all want to party and hang out like old times, while excluding Stifler because he’s nuts. He, of course, finds his way into the mayhem. That mayhem includes the requisite gross out gags like Stifler shitting into a beer cooler by and Jim’s Dad revealing embarrassing sexualBob Grimm details to his son. In one of the film’s funnier bgrimm@ sequences, Jim’s Dad has a rendezvous with newsreview.com Stifler’s Mom (Jennifer Coolidge). Again, Levy is the man, and he makes his moments work. Scott’s Stifler has mellowed a bit. He has 2 minimized that annoying laugh he does, which is a good thing. If you are a Scott fan, I would recommend watching him in his new hockey comedy Goon over any American Pie film. Seriously, a movie where Stifler, Oz, Jim and Jim’s Dad go on a fishing trip that sees Kevin drown in the first 10 minutes would be a better movie. I like those four characters just fine. It’s the rest of them that clutter things up. I have no need for anything dealing with characters played by Natasha Lyonne and Shannon Elizabeth. They only get a scene apiece in this film, but that’s still too much. Katrina Bowden, a Marcia Brady lookalike who’s all sorts of awesome in Tucker & Dale vs. Evil, is a decent standout amongst the newcomers as Mia, Oz’s supermodel girlfriend. She plays a ditz and she plays it well. She’s also freaking Meryl Streep next to Tara Reid when it comes to acting chops. Scott, Levy, Klein and Biggs all have a reasonable amount of talent. I wouldn’t be opposed to seeing them in a different project altogether where they get to share the screen and play against type. American Reunion has its moments, and is at least the second best film in the series after the original. I just fear the next film will be something like American Divorce where we have to sit through lawyer meetings with Jim and Michelle or American Rehab, with extended scenes of Stifler in group therapy. Please—no more! Ω

“Drove my Chevy to the levee, but the levee was dry ...”

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POOR

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FAIR

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GOOD

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VERY GOOD

5

EXCELLENT 421 Jump Street Jonah Hill and Channing Tatum team up as an unlikely comic duo for this twisted reboot of the infamous ’80s TV show that launched the career of a little guy named Johnny Depp. The two play former high school enemies who become friends at their new job of being cops. After quickly getting into trouble, they are put into the newly reactivated 21 Jump Street program—with an angry, hilarious Ice Cube as their captain—and must go undercover as high school students to infiltrate a teen drug ring. The two are very funny together, and Tatum displays a surprising amount of comic chops. He actually has the film’s funniest moments. This will stand as one of the year’s funniest and nastiest comedies. It also contains some very memorable cameos.

1Act of Valor Even if the real members of the military cast in this film could act—and believe me, they can’t—the story here is a sputtering dud and ineptly directed. Navy SEALS go on a couple of missions involving kidnap victims, drug lords and terrorists, and the film lacks a sense of adventure or purpose. The film’s big draw is that real military types are cast in major roles. Many of them look the part, but they have flat line deliveries. Still, that would be forgivable had directors Mike McCoy and Scott Waugh possessed the abilities to put together a decent action scene and gotten themselves a decent plot. This is a mess of a movie, and it made a ton of money in its first weekend. Shows you what I know.

3Casa de mi Padre Will Ferrell further cements his goofball status with this crazy film fully devoted to the “telenovela” format, with Ferrell speaking Spanish and the film set in Mexico. Ferrell plays Armando Alvarez, the dumb son of Señor Alvarez. Armando must square off against a notorious drug lord (Gael Garcia Bernal) while feuding with his drug dealer brother (Diego Luna) and trying to steal his lady (Genesis Rodriguez). Ferrell does a decent job with the Spanish language, but it’s Nick Offerman as a DEA agent who gets the biggest laugh when he speaks Spanish like a man who doesn’t give a shit about pronunciation. While Ferrell is his usual funny self, Bernal and Luna steal all of their scenes, doing tremendously funny things with cigarettes and drinks. It might wear you out before it reaches its ending—stay until after the credits—but you’ll get some good laughs along the way.

2The Hunger Games For a big blockbuster based on an extremely popular novel, director Gary Ross’ film looks mighty cheap. Jennifer Lawrence plays Katniss Everdeen, forced to represent her district in a televised contest where young people must battle to the death. While Lawrence is a great actress, she doesn’t fit the role of starving teen very well. Josh Hutcherson plays her fellow district rep, Peeta, and he suits the role just fine. I just couldn’t get by the drab look of the movie, and the horrible shaky cam that manages to destroy the action visuals instead of enhancing them. Stanley Tucci, Toby Jones, Elizabeth Banks and Woody Harrelson are all saddled with silly getups for their roles, which might’ve played OK had another director filmed them. The movie is just a strange clash of tones, never has a consistent feel, and is surprisingly boring considering the subject matter.

3John Carter Every piece of marketing for this movie made it look like total garbage. While it’s no amazing cinematic feat, it does manage to be enjoyable. Taylor Kitsch plays the title character, and he’s taking a critical shellacking for his central performance. I happen to think his performance is the best thing in the film. Based on novels written by Edgar Rice Burroughs way back when, this science fiction fantasy on Mars is a bit overblown in spots, and totally fun in others. I loved when John Carter, a Civil War soldier teleported to Mars, first discovered his ability to jump on the planet. And Willem Dafoe provides his voice to the animated, four-armed Tars, a decent special effect. Casting around Kitsch is awful (Mark Strong and Dominic West as villains … AGAIN), and it feels a bit long. But, like Waterworldbefore it, it’s much better than some critics will lead you to believe.

2Mirror Mirror Director Tarsem Singh, who made last year’s awful, horrible Immortals, does a little better with this wacky take on the story of Snow White. Julia Roberts does her best as the evil queen looking to rid herself of the beautiful Snow White (a charming Lily Collins). Armie Hammer gives it a go as the handsome prince, while Nathan Lane tries to provide comic relief. The film looks good, with lush visuals and costuming. The seven dwarfs are toughed up and amusing. Yet, the film struggles to find a consistent tone that it never quite achieves. Tarsem is capable of making a good-looking movie—it’s just that his movies are usually kind of irredeemably silly. The film rips off Ella Enchantedduring its credits by having Collins lip-synch a pop song. Stupid.

3Safe House Ryan Reynolds plays Matt Weston, a CIA operative who has spent a year sitting in a safe house bouncing a ball against a wall and listening to tunes. He longs for the big assignment in the field, but the organization seems content to keep him out of the way and performing menial tasks. Things change mightily when Tobin Frost (Denzel Washington) is brought to his house for some questioning and good old healthy waterboarding. Frost is a former agent gone rogue, selling secrets to enemy countries and making a decent living off of it. He’s also a dangerous, murderous son of a bitch. Throw into the mix that he’s also virtuous, and you have your typically complicated Washington character. Reynolds and Washington complement each other well in this action thriller that constitutes the rare Reynolds film that is good.

5Titanic in 3D Don’t even hesitate to catch this on the big screen again, and don’t let the 3-D deter you. James Cameron and his crew have done a great job “enhancing” what I consider to be one of the greatest films ever made. The 3-D images, especially in the opening, actual footage of the Titanic wreck, are mesmerizing. While I don’t need to be reminded how great an actor Leonardo DiCaprio is, it’s a cinematic rush to see him in his star-making moment again. One of the main differences between Cameron’s Titanicand his Avataris that, in this film, he had DiCaprio and Kate Winslet masterfully delivering his corny dialogue, as opposed to Sam Worthington in the other. Even Billy Zane’s performance has aged incredibly well; what I once found to be annoying has grown into a great, all-time classic screen villain. The film still hits all the right notes. The 3-D intensifies the experience. It’s a solid time at the movies.

2Wrath of the Titans Bad beards, an especially drab actor, and a whole lot of messed up Greek mythology nonsense make their return in this bad film that is, nonetheless, a marked improvement over 2010’s inexcusable Clash of the Titans. There are enjoyable, even exciting stretches in this film where the action and pyrotechnics overwhelm the fact that the movie is anchored with the dullard that is Sam Worthington. As Perseus, son of Zeus aspiring to be nothing but a human fisherman with awesome flip-hair, he registers zero on the charisma meter. Being that he’s onscreen more than anybody in these Titanpics, it’s a little hard to endorse them. This has some pretty decent explosions and a couple of neat creatures. The 3-D, while not extraordinary, is better than it was in chapter one of this hopefully finished franchise.

Reno

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