The016

THE016

SPECIAL ISSUE | JUNE 2020

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Letter from the EDITOR

ever before have I published twice in one month. I made this decision based on the fact that it was still #Pride Month and I really felt the need to dedicate an issue to this dynamic group of people. I absolutely admire them. I admire their liveliness. I respect them immensely. You will read about Jabulile Tshabalala and Blessing Msiza. They are a proud lesbian couple. I am so proud of how far they’ve come in their journey of love. We celebrate their love in this issue. Another factor that added to my decision was the need to make a difference in regard to the Gender Based Violence that we are faced with as country at the moment. As a feminist, I had to do something to show my role in making females feel at ease. I have a series of pictures from women showing/telling their messages to men. There isn’t much writing in this issue. I didn’t want to derail from the original idea I had while conceptualizing this issue. I want it to be seen as a safe space to have conversations between males and females. More than anything, I would like to see more men stepping up and declaring when they are in need of help instead of killing our women. All the posts in the world won’t take away the fact that women are the target of all these killings. This issue is a cry for the violence to stop. We can’t take any more killings. This issue is a special issue because it doesn’t have all the contents that a normal issue would have. I needed it to stand out on its own. Hence the bareness of the cover. This issue is a representation of a powerful group of people. A group of people I relate to on a personal scale. A group of people who aren’t celebrated enough. If the world doesn’t celebrate them, I will. This issue is for them. Let’s change the way we see women and the LGBTQI community. Let’s do better in educating ourselves about them. We will get there…one uncomfortable conversation at a time. Enjoy. Editor,

Reitumetse Shebe

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CONTENTS

ISSUE NO 6

SPECIAL ISSSUE Features Page 10 - The blessing of happiness

GBV Page 13- A message from women to men

The King Page 6 - All round entertainer Teboho Ndongela “The King” is a vibrant and bubbly personality. The rapper who has been in the game for 3 years now tells me all aboout his music. I collaborated with Sabita for this month’s issue. He is a photographer from Evaton. His logo is on the right. I enjoyed working with him. He’s such a humble man. The cover photo and the photos used in The King’s article were taken by Sabita. THE016 SPECIAL ISSUE JUNE 2020 | 3

Photo and cover photo credit: Sabita ST MaSuburbs 4 | THE016 SPECIAL ISSUE JUNE 2020

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All Hail The King 6 | THE016 SPECIAL ISSUE JUNE 2020

By Reitumetse Shebe

Teboho Ndongela, famously known as King B, is an all round entertainer, a host (MC) and a rapper who has been in the music scene for 3 years now. King B has recently changed his professional name to “The King”. This star from Sebokeng Zone 10 is loud and proud while representing the LGBTQI community with pride. See what I did there? Socials IG and Twitter @Teeyance Facebook page: The King Fan base Fabeook group: The Kingdom- King B’s Fan Base YouTube Channel: Teboho Ndongela Fan base

*All photos used in this article were taken by SPECIAL ISSUE JUNE 2020 | 7 THE016 Sabita ST MaSuburbs

Having started singing in his school choir at the age of 11, The King knew he was talented. He’s even named his fan base The Kingdom. “I have always wanted to be in the singing booth. I’ve wanted to record ever since I started in choral music back in the days”. The King is a vibrant personality. He doesn’t compromise when it comes to his talent, which explains why he is well known for his dynamic stage performances. Journey into the music industry “A rapper by the name of Kat Scavenger met me at a show backstage just after I had introduced an artist to go on stage. He asked to feature me on a song called ‘Huwa pele fela’. That’s when I knew I had the rap thing in me,” Ndongela says. All things LBGTQI “Fortunately enough, I have been gay my whole life. I never had to come out to my parents because my femininity propelled the idea that I could be gay and they were right. To date, I am living freely in an environment that is welcoming and doesn’t make me feel any less of a person. I know I have been the inspiration to so many people who have had difficulties coming out and all I’ve ever said to them was that they should be happy by choice. This caused them to realize that living through me was not a better option than being their actual selves,” says Ndongela. Ndongela has faced many challenges just as many LGBTQI members do. He has been called a ‘sissy’ by people who don’t even understanding what a sissy actually is.

Another challenge he faces is how people always associate his sexuality with why he has money or so they say. Lastly, Ndongela says he constantly has to remind people to never associate his work with his sexuality because “I am great at what I do before being gay”. I was interested in finding out how The King’s career has shaped the way people perceive LGBTQI members, especially in the Vaal. “I have to tell you the honest truth and tell you what I always hear from straight people who become friends of mine. They end up saying ‘Thank you B. If it wasn’t for you, I think I’d still be homophobic’. But outside my circle of friends I think being a public figure in the Vaal who is great at what they do has enabled me to say that I am gay, I am an entertainer and I am good at it. I am a representation of everyone else of my nature. So respect and love members of the LGBTQI community for who they are regardless of the fact that they are not in the public eye. But the Vaal has never been a homophobic place as a collective. We are accelerating with regards to seeing people for being people before anything”. What I loved about The King was how he carried himself. He respected our photo shoot appointment. He came dressed for the occasion and his personality brought warmth to the shoot. He was such a pleasure to interview. What qualities make The King who he is today? “What makes me The King is the fact that I am certain that there’ll never be another ‘B’

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after ‘The King’ [laughs]. The nature of my being makes me who I am. I am loving, caring and selfless amongst many other qualities. It takes being with me in person to get exactly what I am talking about”. And I can attest to how true that is. I learned a lot about The King in person. I got to see just how much of a hard worker he is. He told me about the recording studio he owns in Evaton. He doesn’t rent it, he owns it! I found that so inspiring. “I understand that I was called for the people and the unconditional love that I have for people before classifying them according to what they are to me. Be it family, friends or fans, the core element about the nature of my being is that I am a sweetheart”. Teboho Ndongela, the Sebokeng born sweetheart, is truly a huge inspiration and he’s the perfect example for the upcoming generation.

“We are

accelerating with regards to seeing people for being people before anything

”

*All photos used in this article were taken by Sabita ST MaSuburbs

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A love that was written in the stars Love isn’t always easy. Love isn’t always hard. Love is constantly choosing each other despite the challenges that decision comes with. Love is looking at your partner and seeing a reflection of yourself. Love is when you and your partner become one. Jabulile Tshabalala and Blessing Msiza have been one for 4 years and 7 months and their love is still going strong. This couple teaches us the value of commitment even when the odds are stacked against them. This is their story. 10 | THE016 SPECIAL ISSUE JUNE 2020

Blessing Msiza was a tomboy growing up. She realized that she was attracted to girls by the age of 15. “I didn’t come out of the closet immediately because I was afraid of what people would think of me, especially my family,” says Msiza. One can imagine how difficult it must be to live in the closet. Being afraid of being your truest self because of the judgment you will get from people. Especially family members. Also, it’s strange how families are the most judgmental at times where they should be supportive. I can’t imagine how it must’ve been for Blessing to live this way. Jabulile on the other hand wasn’t attracted to girls, but all that changed when she met a girl in 2013. “I felt attracted to her and I said “Why not?”. I gave it a chance and I suppose that was my introduction to the LGBTQI world,” says Tshabalala. The couple met in 2012 through a mutual friend but officially started dating in November 2015. Family values How did the couple’s families take the news regarding their relationship? “They were not really happy about it. All they wanted was for it to change but they eventually learned to live with it,” Msiza says. “They thought I was going through a phase but eventually they accepted,” says Tshabalala. The sad truth is that members of the LBGTQI community are murdered for choosing to be

themselves. There is also corrective/ curative or homophobic rape. This by definition is a hate crime in which a person is raped based on their sexual orientation. What are the risks that come with being in a public lesbian relationship for Jabulile and Blessing? “The main risk is being raped. Some men are homophobic and they feel like some girls become lesbians because they never experienced intimacy with the opposite gender,” Msiza says. This is a problem that LGBTQI members have faced over and over: being misunderstood and being made to feel as though they need to be saved from themselves. This is the kind of stigma we will have to unlearn one LGBTQI member at a time. What can the couple tell us about the values and lessons that have worked for them? “Our relationship actually taught us so much but we can only mention a few. It has taught us patience, meeting each other halfway and comprising for the one you love. Communication. Respecting each other’s boundaries. We never judge each other based on our past mistakes because we understand that we are not perfect. Mostly importantly, we understand that forgiveness is key,” says Tshabalala. Blessing touched on the lessons that have made their relationship work. “People should learn that what you see is not always what you get. Most people think that our relationship is flawless or just a walk in the park. In all honesty, we are not perfect

but we always make sure that we solve our issues or share our differences. The only thing that people should learn is that communication, respect and loyalty are the fundamentals to a great relationship.” The community is notorious for being the most disapproving of anyone that seems different amongst them. This is nothing new. How does the couple handle such obstacles? “You know to be frank with you, it’s never easy. People have different perspectives when it comes to LGBTQI. Not everyone supports LGBTQI members because from my experience my community has never accepted my sexuality. Their behavior has changed from how it was before I came out of the closet. They are judgmental. They would say unpleasant things when I pass. This was mostly done by men,” says Msiza. In conclusion, Tshabalala signed off by saying “LGBTQI lives matters too. We are not trying to make everyone loves us, we just want to be understood and accepted that’s all.” The point is to teach each other about each other. To accept others as we are accepted and to respect others the same way we wish to be respected. I wish the beautiful couple nothing but the best in their journey of love.

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Socials

BusisiweFacebook: Blessing Msiza IG: ____gemini_blessing Twitter: @MsizaBee JabulileFacebook: Jabulile McHappiness Tshabalala IG: happiness.prudence.tshabalala Twitter: @Happiness_Ceewe

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GENDER BASED VOILENCE: Any kind of gender based violence that results in, or is likely to result in, physical, sexual or psychological harm or suffering to women. This includes threats of violence, coercion or arbitrary deprivation of liberty, whether occurring in public or private

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R E I T U M E T S E 14 | THE016 SPECIAL ISSUE JUNE 2020

T H A N D E K A THE016 SPECIAL ISSUE JUNE 2020 | 15

P U L A N E

#HelpMeStayAlive

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N O M B U Y I S E L O

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N I K I W E

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L I N D I W E

Re leyentseng?!

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P A L E S A

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L E B O H A N G

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