Celebrate Diversity - Pride Month special section

Celebrate Diversity • Pride Month • June 10, 2021 | 1

MORE CONTENT FROM THIS SPECIAL SECTION CAN BE FOUND ONLINE AT:

www.myrecordjournal.com/pride

2 | Celebrate Diversity • Pride Month • www.myrecordjournal.com/pride

DIGNITY, EQUALITY, VISIBILITY Early in our discussions about Pride Month coverage, we knew it needed to be about more than journalism. Our involvement needed to be participatory and so the Record-Journal, in addition to putting together this special section, also is coordinating Pride activities this month for employees, their families and the greater community.

Some of the activities will include joining in with the Southington Pride festivities. Some will center around education and discussion on LGBTQIA+ topics.

to leadership in their partnerships and into the communities they serve.There are Pride celebrations around the world, often held in June or other summer months. Locally, the town of Southington plans its first formal foray into hosting Pride events from May 22 through June 6.

Mark Palmieri and Jolene Micelli are leading the education committee of the Southington Pride celebration. Palmieri said the local LGBTQIA+ community works to support the community (such as collaboOne way we’re encouraging support and rating with local businesses on donations participation is with the Pride Month poster to the local food pantry). He’s thrilled that found in this special section. Readers can the town is supporting the Pride effort, even cut it out, tape it to their window or door purchasing a rainbow flag for the celebraand celebrate along with all who support the tion. In anticipation of a planned flag raising, inherent rights of the LGBTQIA+ community. Palmieri said, “I might get a little teary eyed when that happens.”

We introduce our special coverage of Pride Month with a statement from the United The Record-Journal is committed to continNations Free and Equal Campaign for world- ually improving the diversity of our publiwide acceptance of sexual orientation and cations as well as our workplace. We have gender expression. created a Diversity & Inclusion Committee with a mission “to take actions that will “I appeal to all governments and societies to create and support a workplace and products promote the values of tolerance and respect that are inclusive, diverse and representative for diversity, and to build a world where no of the communities we serve.” one has to be afraid because of their sexual orientation and gender identity,” said UN Secretary-General António Guterres.

The UN campaign addresses topics from bullying to global business standards – asking businesses to foster diversity and promote a culture of respect and equality that extends

We are taking multiple approaches to ensure that our content, community outreach, and hiring practices remain equitable and representative of our community. One example of our outreach is “listening”. This is done through a program called Voices, a chance

for us to hear opinions, on current topics, directly from local people. We host a Latino Communities Reporting Lab, another opportunity for us to get direct input. By listening to our community, we can better provide our readers with focused content to keep you informed and engaged.

We also support local students by offering minority internships and scholarships, and we’re developing new ways to attract and retain diverse and representative talent.

As part of the Record-Journal’s ongoing diversity and inclusion initiative, we’re here to tell the stories from the LGBTQIA+ community and excited to bring our readers Pride Month coverage. Many of us are still learning about what all those identifiers – the letters – represent. In these pages you’ll find more about that as well as more resources to promote understanding and to support individuals and families.

Jason Collins, the first openly gay athlete in a major American team sport put it this way in a Sports Illustrated essay: “Openness may not completely disarm prejudice, but it’s a good place to start.”

We hope our readers enjoy today’s presentation and will join us on the Record-Journal Facebook page June 14 at noon for a virtual community discussion facilitated by the Stonewall Speakers group, an LGBTQ+ education and advocacy group.

Record-Journal Diversity & Inclusion Committee

RJ DIVERSITY & INCLUSION COMMITTEE CO-CHAIRS OLIVIA LAWRENCE, COURTNEY WENGENROTH ADVISORS RALPH TOMASELLI, LIZ WHITE MEMBERS NORWYN CAMPBELL, JEREMY COTE, ERIC COTTON, MARIAH MELENDEZ CONTRIBUTORS LORRAINE S. CONNELLY, LINDA LANKOWSKI, LISA CAPPALLI, NADYA KORYTNIKOVA, MARIAH MELENDEZ, JEFFERY KURZ, JESSICA SIMMS, JOY VANDERLEK, FAITH WILLIAMS, MARIAH MELENDEZ, JEFFERY KURZ, ASHLEY KUS, OLIVIA LAWRENCE , GLENN RICHTER, RALPH TOMASELLI, DAVE ZAJAC GRAPHIC DESIGNERS ERIK ALLISON, MARK DULLEA, GRADY STEPHENSON, BARTOSZ ZINOWKO WEBSITE RON RAINEY, RICHIE RATHSACK

Celebrate Diversity • Pride Month • June 10, 2021 | 3

Riot

A that rocked the world Record-Journal staff Pride Month events are held worldwide each year, usually in June, and while the emphasis is on celebration, the origins began on a very different kind of occasion.

Pride Month has its beginnings in the Stonewall Riots, sometimes called the Stonewall Uprising.

While there is a wide variety of histories regarding events surrounding “Stonewall”, here are the basics that most researchers, observers and analysts agree on.

In 1969, there were laws prohibiting homosexual activity. During that time, the Stonewall Inn was a popular gay bar on Christopher Street, New York City.

Sometime after midnight on June 28, 1969, police raided the inn.

Their attempt to disperse or arrest patrons was not successful.

From the National Archives: “Officers were forced back into the bar by the crowd until riot-control reinforcements arrived several hours later, but protesters refused to disperse until 4:30 a.m. The riots continued for several days and

Stonewall Inn, Christopher Street, New York City, is the birthplace of Pride Month. | New York Public Library

expanded to the neighborhoods surrounding Christopher Park. By the final day of the riots on July 3, the crowd exceeded several thousand people.”

The turmoil brought attention to issues that went beyond the Stonewall Inn and raids on gay bars, putting the spotlight on harassment and discrimination, legal and otherwise, based on sexual orientation.

The event sparked the formation of scores of gay rights organizations, including the Human Rights Campaign, OutRage!

The first Pride parades were held on June 28, 1970, the one-year anniversary of the Stonewall Riots.

Parades were held in New York City, San Francisco, Chicago and Los Angeles.

The anniversary has been celebrated ever since and events and festivities have expanded. In 2019, to celebrate the 50th anniversary, about 5 million people participated in WorldPride NYC. At that event, New York City Police Commissioner James P. O’Neill rendered a formal apology on behalf of the New York Police Department for the actions of its officers at Stonewall in 1969.

Numerous historical documents, including information from history. com and harvard.edu, were used in this report.

Join us on Facebook June 14 You’re invited to a virtual community discussion with the Stonewall Speakers, a program of the Connecticut Stonewall Foundation, Inc. The all-volunteer speaker's bureau is comprised of lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender people and their allies.

We’ll talk about this Pride Month special section, including a Q&A session with our panelists.

When: Noon to 1 p.m., June 14 Where: Record-Journal Facebook page

4 | Celebrate Diversity • Pride Month • www.myrecordjournal.com/pride

Connecticut

Pride Factors

Pride Factor: Same-sex marriage has been legally recognized in Connecticut since Nov. 12, 2008, following a state court decision that found the state’s civil unions failed to provide same-sex couples with rights and privileges equivalent to those of marriage. Connecticut was the second state to do so after Massachusetts. As of June 26, 2015 the Supreme Court issued a decision that same-sex couples can marry in all 50 states.

This 1974 photo originally captioned “These parents are doing ‘Pride’ right”, is part of the LGBTQ+ History-Archives Collection.

What is PRIDE all about?

There are many definitions when it comes to the concept of Pride Month, but the underlying message of equality is always at the core. Here are a few takes from a variety of sources.

“It’s a movement that celebrates sexual diversity. For lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people it’s a way of protesting about discrimination and violence. It promotes their dignity, equal rights, self-affirmation and is a way of increasing society’s awareness of the issues they face.” – International Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Trans and Intersex Association “Pride Month commemorates the ongoing pursuit of equal justice for the lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and queer community and celebrates the accomplishments of LGBTQ individuals.” – Britannica “PRIDE stands for Promote Respect, Inclusion, and Dignity for Everyone. There’s also a gay political organization that uses the acronym as Personal Rights in Defense and Education.

– Wikipedia “Gay pride or LGBT pride refers to a worldwide movement and philosophy asserting that lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender individuals should be proud of their sexual orientation and gender identity. The movement has three main

premises: that people should be proud of their sexual orientation and gender identity, that sexual diversity is a gift, and that sexual orientation and gender identity are inherent and cannot be intentionally altered.” – National Women’s History Alliance “Gay pride events, including gay pride parades and festivals were started in major urban centers to improve the visibility, acceptance and legal protections for LGBTQ+ people living in those communities. While the aim of Pride Day started with a political nature, many cities around the world have such wide acceptance and legal protections that many events have become a celebration of pride for the local LGBTQ+ community.” – International Gay and Lesbian Travel Association “The word ‘pride’ is an integral cultural concept within the lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer, intersex community, representing solidarity, collectivity, and identity as well as resistance to discrimination and violence. Its associated symbolism (e.g., rainbow colors) – communicates to individuals that LGBTQI members are welcome as valuable members of the community.” – University of California, LGBT Resource Center – Record-Journal staff

Pride Factor: Connecticut is regarded as one of the most LGBTQ+-friendly U.S. states, due to its early adoption of LGBTQ+ rights legislation. According to a 2017 survey by the Public Religion Research Institute showed 73 % of Connecticut residents support same-sex marriage.

Pride Factor: Hartford ranks among the places with the highest percentage of adults who identify as lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgender, according to a 2015 Gallup Poll study of the top 50 U.S. metropolitan areas.

A total of 4.6 percent of residents in Hartford identify as LGBTQ+, putting the Connecticut capital in a tie with Denver and Los Angeles. For the purposes of the study, Hartford includes West Hartford and East Hartford. The national average, among the top 50 metropolitan areas, is 3.6 percent.

San Francisco ranked No. 1.

Pride Factor: Southington Pride Week brought the celebration to town this spring. Local members of the gay, lesbian and bisexual community planned the festivities.

Events included: raising a rainbow flag, painting a rainbow crosswalk on Apple Alley and youth events at Camp Sloper. “Our main goal was to come together as a town and celebrate pride,” said Alicia Novi, a committee member.

– Record-Journal staff

Celebrate Diversity • Pride Month • June 10, 2021 | 5

a brief

history of pride

Pride milestones go back long before the modern day celebrations.

Here are just a few highlights from history – with a focus on progress in the LGBTQ+ movement. For a deeper look at the timeline check out resources used to create this outline: lgbtqhistory.org and the Out in All Directions Almanac, the National Archives as well as numerous other sources.

1732 Lesbian as a term, meaning women who loved women, was first used by William King in his book, The Toast, published in England.

1852

Meet our Guest Editor Hey everyone! My name is Mariah Melendez and I am 26 years old. I graduated from New York University in 2017 with a dual degree in journalism and anthropology (and I was just one credit away from a minor in American Sign Language). I’ve been working at The Cheshire Herald (part of the RJ Media Group) as a general assignment reporter for the past two years and I love it.

When I was in college, I wrote one of my senior papers on the importance of LGBTQ+ community centers in Trump’s America, and I can safely say many of the I lived in Cheshire my whole life points I made in that essay still Guest editor Mariah Melendez with my parents until recentring true today. No matter who with her bulldog, Khaleesi. ly when I moved into my own you are, you should be able to apartment in Wallingford. My live your life 100% authentically, family circle now includes bulldog Khaleesi, and most regardless of gender or sexuality. recently my new cat, Elmer.

I hope some of the articles in this section speak to you The LGBTQ+ community has been my safe place for most of my life. When I started high school in Cheshire, I noticed the severe lack of LGBTQ+ di-

Writer J.D. Bothwick reports his attendance at a “miner’s ball” – a men’s only dance held in Angels’ Camp in California.

1890 Birth of Alan Hart, who pioneered the use of the X-Ray for tuberculosis diagnosis and one of the first transgender men in history.

1907 Gertrude Stein meets Alice B. Toklas, sparking a legendary romance. In Paris, the two women set up a salon for writers and artists, including gays. Stein publicly declares her love for Toklas in print in The Autobiography of Alice B. Toklas, published in 1933.

1917-1935 The Harlem Renaissance. Many historians say the renaissance was Continued on page 7

and help widen your idea of sexuality and gender.

– Mariah Melendez

COMMENTARY

LGBTQIA CENTERS

1886 Henry James writes the book, The Bostonians, about a long term relationship between two women and the term “Boston Marriages” develops to describe two women living together, independent of financial support from a man.

versity in our community, and wanted to make a change. A few of my friends and I started Cheshire High School’s very first GSA (gay/straight alliance) and I am proud to say the club is still running to this day.

provide supportive community

By Mariah Melendez Herald Staff Finding a sense of community is hard. When I was in high school, I knew I stood out but I couldn’t understand why. I had frizzy curly hair, a flair for the dramatic, and a nearly non-existent self-esteem from years of unprocessed trauma and general confusion over my own gender identity. For many aspects of my early life I was forced to fit into boxes that I knew were either temporary or disingenuous, at least it was until I learned I could create my own box.

When I entered my sophomore year at Cheshire High School, a

few friends and I thought of the idea of creating a Gay Straight Alliance. We talked about the overall lack of any kind of LGBTQIA awareness at our school, and how rampant anti-LGBTQIA bullying was at the time. If only we could create a safe place for LGBTQIA students, and a place to educate our peers on LGBTQIA issues that were important to us.

Luckily, we received a lot of support early on from many school administrators. We quickly got a class advisor, Mrs. Milone, and were set on the path to start holding club meetings and planning events, with no idea how much this club would impact the entire

school community.

From the first meeting held in early September, we were onto something.

Mrs. Milone’s classroom was standing-room only as we passed around a contact sheet for students to write their email addresses. Students were spilling out into the hallway as they clamored for a pencil, piece of paper, anything to get their information written down. They were just as hungry for a sense of community as I was.

While our numbers thinned out as the year went on, the club’s first year was incredibly successful.

Continued on page 13

6 | Celebrate Diversity • Pride Month • www.myrecordjournal.com/pride

COMMENTARY

a catalyst for

Business & Growth

By Paul Whitman

Over one third of the Fortune 500 recognize this certification and partner with NGLCC to create fully LGBT-inclusive supply chains. A ‘Certified Business’ designation levels the playing field.

The Connecticut Gay and Lesbian Chamber is the voice of the LGBTQ+ business community in Connecticut.

Members also include allied business professionals, those supportive of LGBTQ+ causes including diversity and inclusion in and outside of the workplace. Together, as a group, the CTGLC seeks to increase the economic strength of both LGBTQ+ and allied organizations through business development, leadership, advocacy, and visibility.

The chamber represents more than 165 businesses from all major industries around the state. Locally, some members include Comcast in Berlin, the law practice of Mancini, Provenzano & Futtner in Southington, the Wheeler Clinic in Plainville and Pilothouse Communications in Cheshire.

The beginnings Since the group’s founding in 2007 as the Connecticut Alliance for Business Opportunities, it has become and remains an important voice in the LGBTQ+ community.

In fact, one can safely say that it’s now an integral part of the state’s small-business engine.

The CTGLC is an affiliate of the National LGBT Chamber of Commerce. It is non-partisan, but will always remain politically concerned, especially regarding health,

Executive Director John Pica-Sneeden and former Lt. Gov. Nancy Wyman at the One Big Event in 2018.

Courtesy of the Connecticut Gay & Lesbian Chamber of Commerce.

equality, justice, fairness, and the many civil rights issues that impact the LGBTQ+ community Chamber President Martin L. Heft says that the CTGLC promotes business networking among its members and within our community at large. This network fosters a sharing of information, ideas, contacts, and products and services. In the end, it strengthens and expands our businesses, careers and our community.

‘Certified Business’ The CTGLC is the exclusive third-party certifying body for Certified LGBT Business Enterprise® (Certified LGBTBE®) companies.

Noack’s Meat Products Home of the Finest Bratwurst

R242021

HAPPY PRIDE MONTH! 1112 East Main Street, Meriden, CT • (203) 235-7384

OPEN Tues–Thurs 8–5:30 • Fri 8–6 • Sat 8–5 • Closed Sun & Mon

On its website, The National LGBT Chamber of Commerce (formerly NGLCC) states that its Supplier Diversity Initiative offers businesses a tool to make connections and opens doors with America’s top corporations, several federal government agencies and other certified businesses. The SDI certifies Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and/or Transgender owned Business Enterprises (LGBTBEs) and works to provide opportunities for LGBTBEs to gain exposure within government and corporate procurement processes either as a contractor or a subcontractor.

Major impact There is a major impact on small businesses that choose to affiliate with a chamber of commerce, according to the Association of Chamber of Commerce Executives.

It’s interesting to note that a national survey of 2,000 adults conducted in 2012 by The Schapiro Group, revealed that 49% of consumers were more likely to think favorably of a local business if it was a member of the local Chamber. What is more, there is a 73% increase in consumer awareness, a 68% increase in its local reputation, and an 80% increase in the likelihood that consumers will patronize the business in the future.

LGBTQ+ and ally business professionals are encouraged to join Connecticut’s most influential LGBTQ+ business organization.

For more information, contact John Pica-Sneeden, Executive Director at 860-612-8351, john@ctglc.org. Or visit ctglc.org.

Paul Whitman is secretary for the Connecticut Gay and Lesbian Chamber of Commerce.

LGBTQIA+ What do the letters represent?

Record-Journal staff Most of us are familiar with LGBT, LGBTQ and LGBTQ+ – referring to lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender/transexual identities. The Q is for the broad concept of “queer” but also frequently understood to represent those who are questioning any aspect of their gender expression or sexual identity.

The “plus” is for any and all other aspects of human sexual expression or identity.

In recent years, “I” and “A” have been added to the mix to acknowledge intersex, asexual, agender and aromantic individuals. Often included as part of the “A” are “allies” – people who don’t necessarily identify as part of the community but who support and advocate for those who do. You may see an added “P” for pansexual/polyamorous.

But more likely, you’ll see LGBTQIA expanded with a plus.

At Texas Tech, the Office of LGBTQIA Education and Engagement explains the categories this way: “When thinking about all these different identities, they all fall within several buckets: Gender Expression; Gender Identity; Sex Assigned at Birth; and Sexual and Romantic Orientation. The terminology used for these identities is extensive and that is a good thing as it gives added ability for labeling (labels are not all bad some are very affirming).”

The use of the terms LGBT, LGBTQ, and LGBTQ+ continue to be widely used, especially in speaking – and are the accepted style for news organizations - but the broader abbreviation that includes “I” and “A” has gained acceptance and also is widely used.

Celebrate Diversity • Pride Month • June 10, 2021 | 7

Leadership from the LGBTQ+ community Record-Journal staff In the 2018 state election cycle, 10 candidates who identified as LGBTQ+ ran for office, six Republicans and four Democrats.

While not all were successful in their bid, the fact that a significant number of LGBTQ+ individuals were looking for political leadership roles was noted in the media. The Hartford Courant dubbed this activism a “rainbow wave.”

State Sen. Beth Bye of West Hartford and Rep. Jeff Currey of East Hartford are Democrats. Both won re-election and both are openly gay.

Bye married Dr. Tracey Wilson on Nov. 12, 2008. They were the first gay couple to be married in Connecticut. Tracey Wilson is West Hartford town historian and the couple live with their four children. Bye was the first member of the legislature to enter into a civil union Raghib Allie-Brennan, a Democrat from Bethel, won his 2018 bid for state representative.

State Sen. Alex Kasser, a Democrat from Greenwich, won a second term in 2020.

The six Republican candidates who ran in 2018 were from all corners of the state. While many were new to the state level of campaigning, most had held local leadership positions. Those candidates were: John Scott of Mystic; A.J. Kerouac of Brooklyn; Ken Richards of Groton; Mary Fay of West Hartford; Robert Smedley of New Britain; and Shaun Mastroianni of Stonington.

Books, Movies, events & more Pride Month is an opportunity to explore and there are many fun, inspirational, entertaining and educational ways to go about that. Families, friends, book clubs, church groups and other gatherings might look to books, film, music, art exhibits and other cultural activities as a way to discuss their experiences and ideas about gender, sexual orientation and the changes in attitudes, law and society over the past decade or so.

Whether you are learning, celebrating, validating, experimenting, curious, questioning or otherwise interested in LGBTQ+ topics, here are a few favorites curated by guest editor Mariah Melendez along with contributions from LGBTQ+ educator and advocate Linda Lankowski.

Books Giovanni’s Room, by James Baldwin. Adult fiction. In the 1950s Paris of American expatriates, liaisons, and violence, a young man finds himself caught between desire and conventional morality.

Annie on My Mind, by Nancy Garden. Youth fiction. The story of two teenage girls whose friendship blossoms into love despite pressures from family and school that threaten their relationship.

Transgender History, by Susan Stryker. Nonfiction. An in depth walk through the history of transgendered individuals in the United States.

Fun Home, by Alison Bechdel.

Graphic novel, now also a Broadway show. The story of a closeted father and his lesbian daughter.

Tomorrow Will Be Different: Love, Loss, and the fight for Trans equality, by Sarah McBride. A story of trans acceptance through told through McBride’s own transition.

The Deviants War: The Homosexual vs. The United States of America- by Eric Cervini. First LGBTQ+ history book to make the NYT best seller list in over 25 years. Documents gay activism in the early ‘50s and ‘60s.

Broken Horses, by Brandi Carlile.

The five-time Grammy Award winner’s autobiography tells how she overcame the barriers of poverty and sexual orientation.

This is the Fire: This is What I say to my Friends About Racism, by Don Lemon. Autobiography by the CNN News anchor and gay activist.

One Life, by Megan Rapinoe. A professional soccer player, Rapinoe tells her story and advocates for gender, fiscal and racial equality, especially in women’s sports.

Continued on page 15

history Continued from page 5 “as gay as it was Black.” Lesbian, gay or bisexual people in this movement includes writers and poets such as Langston Hughes and Zora Neale Hurston; and entertainers Ma Rainey, Bessie Smith, Ethel Waters and Gladys Bentley.

1924 The Society for Human Rights, the first gay rights organization, was founded in Chicago by Henry Gerber, a German immigrant. The organization ceased to exist after most of its members were arrested.

1950 The Mattachine Society formed in Los Angeles, California by activist Harry Hay and is one of the first sustained gay rights groups in the U.S. It continues to this day.

1952 Christine Jorgensen became one of the most famous transgender people when she underwent a sex change operation and went on to a successful career in show business.

1966 Compton’s Cafeteria Riot, San Francisco. Transgender and drag queens in San Francisco react to ongoing police harassment. One result: the National Transsexual Counseling Unit in support of transgender people.

1967 The Oscar Wilde Memorial Bookshop is opened in New York City by Craig Rodwell. The bookshop — devoted to gay history and gay rights — is believed to be the first of its kind in the U.S.

1969

State comptroller Kevin Lembo, a Democrat, won re-election. He was Connecticut’s first openly gay statewide official and was

The Stonewall Riots, New York City. The Stonewall Inn was a gay bar in Greenwich Village in New York City. In response to an unprovoked police raid on an early

Continued on page 13

Continued on page 9

8 | Celebrate Diversity • Pride Month • www.myrecordjournal.com/pride

legal issues for LGBTQ are the specialty of this connecticut BAR GROUP

By Nadya Korytnikova Record-Journal staff

Same sex couples who say

“I do”

By Joy VanderLek Special to the Record-Journal

involved with helping same sex partners tie the knot since the start.

Since same-sex marriage became legal in Connecticut in 2008, thousands of couples have taken the plunge.

From 2009 to 2018, the state has seen more than 12,087 same-sex marriages officiated.

Same-sex marriage has been legally recognized in Connecticut since Nov. 12, 2008, following a state court decision that found the state's civil unions failed to provide same-sex couples with rights and privileges equivalent to those of marriage.

Justice of the Peace Lea Pomaszewsk, owner of “The Wedding Ladies of Middlesex County”, with her mother, the late Eleanor Pomaszewski, also a justice of the peace and founder of the Wedding Ladies service.

Taking the rights of same sex couples a step further, on July 16, 2014, the Connecticut Supreme Court, reversed judgments in lower courts and ruled unanimously that a same-sex couple in a relationship established before the state afforded legal recognition to their relationship has the same rights as other married couples.

After a bump in 2009, after legalization took hold, the number of same sex couples choosing marriage has remained fairly consistent in recent years: 543 in 2008; 2,706 in 2009; 1,791 in 2010; 1,262 in 2011; 668 in 2012; 1,356 in 2013; 1,057 in 2014; 689 in 2015; 704 in 2016; 672 in 2017; and 639 in 2018.

Across the country, according to estimates from the 2019 Current Population Survey Annual Social and Economic Supplement, there are 543,000 same-sex married couple households and 469,000 households with same-sex unmarried partners living together.

None of this is news to local justices of the peace.

The Wedding Ladies of Middlesex County have been

Second generation justice of the peace, Lea Pomaszewsk, is the owner of “The Wedding Ladies of Middlesex County.” Her mother, the late Eleanor Pomaszewski, was a justice of the peace and the original “Wedding Lady of Middlesex County.” Her father also was a justice of the peace.

Her mother officiated same sex weddings “as soon as it became legal in Connecticut,” said Lea Pomaszewski. “I am proud of my mother. I am proud of her being an early proponent of same sex marriages,” she said, adding, “She was one of the first.”

Same sex unions didn’t always receive that level of support. According to a headline in the Connecticut Post, July 7, 2008, “For civil unions Justices of the Peace can say ‘I won’t.”

The Post wrote that “Connecticut Secretary of State Susan Bysiewicz, said public employees, such as town clerks who give marriage and civil union licenses, are prohibited from discriminating. But justices of the peace are simply nominated by their political parties and are therefore in a different category. Just like a lawyer can refuse a case, a JP can say no to civil union request.”

The LGBTQ Section of the Connecticut Bar Association is a professional association of gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender attorneys, judges, paralegals, and law students who provide an LGBTQ presence within Connecticut’s legal community.

“We try to provide support and resources to people who are practicing law and are providing services to LGBTQ clients,” said Grayson Holmes, chair of the LGBTQ Section of the Connecticut Bar Association. “At the end of the day, it really does take a community of LGBTQ lawyers to help protect and promote the legal rights of LGBTQ members in our state.”

According to the LGBTQ Section, the organization strives to create an open, inclusive, and engaging space for all federal practitioners - LGBTQ and allies alike. It promotes recognition of civil and human rights, sensitivity to legal issues faced by the LGBTQ community, and enhances the practice and professional expertise of lawyers who serve or who are members of the LGBTQ community. In addition to providing resources, the LGBTQ Section is providing educational seminars for all members of the bar association. On April 28, it held a webinar teaching lawyers to create a safe and welcoming environment for transgender clients and colleagues.

The LGBTQ Section will continue holding similar programs, which can be found at ctbar.org/events.

Lea Pomaszewski recalled that when same-sex marriage was first legalized the calls started coming in and couples would say they had searched for officiants to marry them, and often would get negative feedback.

“You would be amazed by how many different areas of the law, LGBTQ people are affected,” Holmes. “We provide a collective resource for attorneys who need to solve legal issues that are

Continued on page 13

Continued on page 13

Celebrate Diversity • Pride Month • June 10, 2021 | 9

history Continued from page 7 Saturday morning in June, over 400 lesbian, bisexual, transgender and heterosexual people protested for days.

1970 A gay Hispanic group, Unidos, meets for the first time.

1972 “Coming Out!” a play by Jonathan Ned Katz, is performed for the first time in New York and provides a historical perspective of gay life from the colonial period to the present.

a deeper look at the

Wedding Cake Case

By Lisa Cappalli In 2012 Messrs. Craig and Mullins asked Mr. Phillips’ bakery to bake them a wedding cake to celebrate the couple’s upcoming marriage.

Mr. Phillips declined because of his religious opposition to same sex marriage. He offered to sell them other cakes. The couple then complained to the Colorado Civil Rights Commission that Mr. Phillips’ refusal was a violation of a state law that prohibits a place of business engaged in the sale of goods or services to the public from discrimination based on sexual orientation. The Commission agreed with the couple. It ordered Mr. Phillips, among other things, to stop selling wedding cakes only to heterosexual couples. Mr. Phillips appealed, ultimately, to the United States Supreme Court.

The Supreme Court decided in favor of Mr. Phillips. It nullified the Commission decision because it found that the Commission acted improperly by failing to give Mr. Phillips the respectful and neutral hearing that his Constitutional right to freely exercise his religion required.

Because the decision was based on improper conduct of the Commission, the case was neither a win nor a loss for same-sex couples or those with religious opposition to same-sex marriage.

The Supreme Court did set out principles to be considered in cases like this: “The first is the authority of a State and its governmental entities to protect the rights and dignity of gay persons who are, or wish to be, married but who face discrimination when they seek goods or services. The second is the right of all persons to exercise fundamental freedoms under the First Amendment [of the US Constitution] … both the freedom of speech and the free exercise of religion.”

It recognized that it is a “delicate question” to reconcile the constitutionally protected rights of decent people, like Messrs. Craig, Mullins and Phillips, who, when you get behind labels, are simply trying to live their lives according to genuine and legitimate beliefs.

The Supreme Court opinion concluded: “The outcome of cases like this in other circumstances

must await further elaboration in the courts, all in the context of recognizing that these disputes must be resolved with tolerance, without undue disrespect to sincere religious beliefs, and without subjecting gay persons to indignities when they seek goods and services in an open market.”

Time will tell when and how the next “Wedding Cake Case” or cases like it will be resolved. Read the Supreme Court decision at: www. lcappalli-familylaw.com/masterpiece-cakeshop-ltd-et-al-v-colorado-civil-rights-commission-et-al.

Lisa J. Cappalli is Of Counsel at the law firm of Freed Marcroft, LLC. She can be reached at lisa@ freedmarcroft.com or 203-2713888. This column should not be construed as legal advice or legal opinion Lisa J. Cappalli or Freed Marcroft, LLC on any specific facts or circumstances. The content is intended for general information only and you are urged to consult an attorney to advise you personally concerning your own situation and any specific legal questions you may have.

1973 American Psychiatric Association removes homosexuality as a mental illness.

1977 Harvey Milk is elected county supervisor in San Francisco and becomes the third “out” elected public official in the U.S. and the first in California.

1978 In San Francisco, the Rainbow Flag is first flown during the Gay Freedom Parade, June 25.

1978 Harvey Milk is assassinated Nov. 27 at San Francisco City Hall by former county supervisor Dan White. Also killed in the incident was the city’s mayor, George Moscone. White was later convicted of voluntary manslaughter, a verdict that sparked the “White Night Riots.”

1979 Chapters of the national organization of Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays (PFLAG) are founded across the United States.

1980 Continued on page 11

10 | Celebrate Diversity • Pride Month • www.myrecordjournal.com/pride

college campuses create centers of support and connection

By Jessica Simms Special to the Record-Journal As a way to support the LGBTQ+ community on campus, area colleges and universities have a variety of support groups, student clubs and resources available to students.

Quinnipiac University At Quinnipiac University, the Gender Sexuality Alliance is a student-run organization that serves as a safe space for students who identify as members of the LGBTQ+ community and their allies. Along with support, the alliance educates students on issues facing the LGBTQ community.

“I think that GSA gives a lot of young adults experience in LGBTQ+ culture because they’re away from their families for the first time,” said Mary Vidallon, GSA president. “It’s kind of a new space where (students) can feel safe and step into finding themselves especially being alone and independent. I think the club offers that in a way.”

Before COVID-19, the GSA held in-person events and activities. However, meetings and events were via Zoom this past year.

“I feel like COVID-19 really changed things, but I feel like we still found a way to have fun events,” said Athena Cuttle, past president of GSA. “We’ll have game nights, sometimes we’ll have more educational meetings depending on holidays or other things happening within the week and just do different things to make sure everyone has a safe space and a comfortable place to come spend time with friends.”

Cuttle also worked with the university to create gender inclusive housing options for the 2021-22 school year and Vidallon expressed optimism that more initiatives can be put in place for the LGBTQ+ community on campus.

“I know Athena has made a ton of strides especially including gender inclusive housing,” Vidallon said. “... Even more accessibility for LGBTQ+ students and maybe opening more gender inclusive bathrooms or maybe opening a women or LGBTQ center would be ideal in the next steps...”

University of Connecticut The Rainbow Center at the University of

Connecticut is one of five cultural centers on campus, with the “mission to operate in the service of a more equitable world for all students, faculty and staff,” according to its website.

It officially opened in September 1998 and provides resources and services to the UConn community.

One program is the FAMILEE mentoring program, which stands for Fostering Academics, Maturity, Independence, Leadership, Empowerment & Excellence.

It “pairs new first-year students and second-year students with continuing students for participation in one-on-one meetings and larger group events. This program is designed to assist students in their first and second year at UConn-Storrs (including those coming from regional campuses and transfer students) with their transition,” according to the website.

The center’s Out to Lunch Lecture Series is another program that includes academic lectures and discussions with guest scholars and community activists. Due to the pandemic, this past year’s presentations were held online.

Wesleyan University The Queer Resource Center was created by students who were looking for a space for the LGBTQ+ community to gather. In 2015, students started to advocate for an expansion to the center to include more staffing and two years later, the resource center was created to serve the LGBTQ+ community, students of color, students who identify as women and first generational low income students.

The center focuses on race; ethnicity and nationality; gender and sexuality; socioeconomic status; social and political activism; and disability, sustainability and spirituality.

“We really have to think about the whole person and not just little bits of it,” said Demetrius Colvin, center director. “How can we learn about, develop and teach about the whole person?”

The resource center works with student leaders across campus to support the LGBTQ+ community. This includes implementing programming and events.

“We have our pride reception at the begin-

ning of the year during orientation where the new incoming queers end up meeting the old returning queers and faculty and staff as well,” Colvin said.

Central Connecticut State University The school’s LGBT Center opened in 2009.

“We have a lot of students who come up to the center and take part in the activities we do,” said WIlliam Mann, center director. “We have programming, we have support groups and we have resources as well — both health resources and also just resources for the community. It’s become a very vital cultural center at Central.”

Connecticut College At Connecticut College, there are three student groups on campus. CQ2, which stands for Connecticut College Queer and Questioning, is a biweekly closed group for students who identify as members of the LGBTQ+ community.

QTPOC, Queer and Trans People of Color, is a biweekly group for queer and trans people of color to come together to discuss their experiences.

PRISM is the queer student association on campus that acts as more of a social group and is open to allies of the LGBTQ community.

“The LGBTQIA Center also offers our queer peer mentorship program which matches typically queer upperclassmen with queer first year and sophomore students,” said Erin Duran, center director. “Connecting folks with maybe more experience within the queer community and navigating queerness… with folks who are a little newer to the community.”

Duran also expressed hope that the center and the groups will continue to help individuals within the community to connect.

“I’m very proud of the progress (Connecticut College) has made in terms of being a really queer inclusive institution and a lot of that really manifests on campus in forms of these groups and the opportunity for connections,” Duran said. jsimms@record-journal.com 203-317-2208 Twitter: @jessica_simms99

Celebrate Diversity • Pride Month • June 10, 2021 | 11

history

Continued from page 9 The American Psychiatric Association adds Gender Identity Disorder as a mental illness. This categorization refers to depression, anxiety and other issues related to orientation.

1982 Wisconsin becomes the first state to outlaw discrimination based on sexual orientation.

1988 The first national Coming Out Day is celebrated Oct. 11.

1991 Microsoft recognizes the first gay employees group in the U.S. Amanda Strom, art teacher and GSA Advisor, talks about the "Did You Know" display set up by the Gay–Straight Alliance club for Pride month at Maloney High School in Meriden, Fri., Apr. 30, 2021.

The display lists facts, flags and famous people to help bring awareness to the LGBTQ community.

Dave Zajac, Record-Journal

At area high schools, students promote unity, education for LGBTQ+

By Faith Williams Record-Journal staff

how to respond when witnessing bullying.

Local high school students are raising Pride awareness through Gay-Straight Alliance clubs.

“When you feel like you don’t belong, it hurts and it affects you so much,” Lentini said. “So I want to make sure those kids know that they do belong.”

Gay-Straight Alliance clubs are student-run organizations to unite LGBTQ+ and allied youth to build community and organize around issues impacting them in schools and communities, according to GSA Network.

Fe Lentini, a senior at Cheshire High School, said it is important to educate other students about the issue.

“I’m presenting to select freshmen health classes,” Cheshire’s GSA club president said. “It teaches them about the LGBTQ community, gender identity, sexuality, romantic identities and how to support those in the community.”

Lentini offers tips to students and teachers on what she calls “acts of allyship” — such as asking someone what their pronouns are and

Maloney and Platt high schools combined their GSA clubs following the pandemic. Platt is lead by Bryan Sorak and Peggy Borrelli, while Maloney students are lead

by Amanda Strom and Keith Lombardo.

“At Platt, I decided to go with GSA because it’s a long standing club with national recognition,” Sorak said. “I figured it’s good to create a safe space to give our LGBTQ+ students.”

The clubs use virtual meetings to educate and discuss what students are experiencing personally.

“It’s helpful if there is anything I am questioning or trying to figure out about my identity.” said Brooke Montalvo, a club member.

“These are people that have gone through what I’m going through and can help me.”

The schools declared May “High School Pride Month.” There will be a display that includes little known facts and photos as well as books, movies and music anthems that reflect the community.

“Pride Month is about queer people finally being accepted more, celebrating their queerness openly and not be as fearful as they would have before,” Montalvo said.

The Maloney group has other plans like a gender-neutral bathroom, while Platt is working on getting students to have graduation stoles to wear to represent their position in the LGBTQ+ community.

1995 Executive Order signed by President Clinton establishes uniform policies for allowing employees of the federal government access to classified information, stating the government “does not discriminate on the basis of race, color, religion, sex, national origin, disability, or sexual orientation in granting access to classified information."

1996 The Defense of Marriage Act is signed into law by Clinton.

This defines marriage for federal purposes as the union of one man and one woman, and allows states to refuse to recognize same-sex marriages granted under the laws of other states.

In 2013, the act's provisions were ruled unconstitutional or left effectively unenforceable by Supreme Court decisions.

1998

Sheehan High School’s GSA club participates in “Ally Week” and “Day of Silence” to bring more awareness to the LGBTQ+ community.

Matthew Sheppard, a gay student at the University of Wyoming, is beaten, tortured, and left to die near Laramie on the night of Oct.6,1998. One month later the Matthew Shepherd Bill added

Continued on page 15

Continued on page 13

12 | Celebrate Diversity • Pride Month • www.myrecordjournal.com/pride

Resources The Southington PRIDE Resource Center provides this list for access to local and national community resources.

Here you will find 24-hour help/text lines, websites, and a variety of local community resources. In a true medical emergency, please dial 911 or proceed to your nearest local Emergency Room.

Local community organizations that would like to be listed in in the resource guide or if you have a suggestion for a resource/organization, please message Southington PRIDE via Facebook Messenger.

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (24 hours - for everyone of all ages) Call: 1-800-273-8255 Online Chat: suicidepreventionlifeline.org/chat Crisis Text Lifeline (24 hours - Serving Everyone of All Ages) Text "HOME" to 741741 Facebook Messanger Option: www.facebook.com/crisistextline Website: www.crisistextline.org The Trevor Project (24 hours - Serving LGBTQIA+ youth ages 13-24) Call: 1-866-488-7386 Text: "START" to 678678 Website / Online chat option: www.thetrevorproject.org/get-help-now Trans Lifeline (24 hours - Serving trans/questioning individuals) Call: 1-877-565-8860 Website: https://translifeline.org National Runaway Safeline (Serving runaway youth, parents/ guardians) Call: 1-800-786-2929 Text: 66008 Website / Online chat option: www.1800runaway.org

RAINN - National Sexual Assault Hotline (Serving all ages) Call: 1-800-656-4673 Online chat option hotline.rainn.org/online

National Human Trafficking Helpline (Serving all ages) Call: 1-888-373-7888 Online reporting of human trafficking: humantraffickinghotline.org

Telling a parent or other close family or friend about one’s sexual orientation or gender identity can be a big step. A “coming out” letter can help. This sample letter from pointofpride.org is in regards to a transgender reveal, however there are similar resources online for other coming out announcements. The points made in this letter illustrate the many feelings and concerns individual members of the LGBTQ+ community may have when seeking acceptance. Point of Pride also recommends that individuals planning to come out, especially youth, get support first, and make sure that it is safe to do so in their situation. One resource for support is https:// www.lgbtcenters.org/LGBTCenters.

Dear [parent], This letter is a bit difficult for me to write, but I feel that it is important for me to write it. There is something I have been carrying inside of myself for some time now, and I now feel ready to come to you with it.

I am transgender. Specifically, I identify as [insert gender identity here], which means that I [insert either the proper definition of your gender, or the most easily understood explanation for your gender identity that you feel they will understand (i.e. “I feel like a girl on the inside.”)].

I know this may be a bit difficult to understand at first, and it may be very new to you, but it is something I have known for some time. I trust you with this information about who I am, and I would like if in return that you start calling me by my chosen name, which is [if applicable, here], and using my pronouns, which are [here].

I plan to [insert aspects of social transition you plan to pursue here, such as changes to your presentation. If you plan to pursue a medical transition in the near future, such as hormone replacement therapy or surgery, you may mention this here, too.] This is to help me feel more at home in my body as well as the world, and it’s a feeling I hope that you can understand.

I’m still your child, with the same likes and dislikes – I’ll just be living more authentically as the true me. And I know that you may have some slip-ups calling me [Name] or using [pronouns] at first, and that is okay. I would just like to know that you are trying your best to learn, understand, and support me. If you do slip-up, you do not have to make a big deal out of it. Correcting yourself is enough for me to see that you care about and respect who I am.

If you have questions, I want to talk about them and help answer them. I also understand you may want to speak with other parents of trans children to learn more. There are plenty of resources for parents and families in person and online, and I am happy to show you some of them.

Thank you for your understanding and your support, [Your name] For more information go to: pointofpride.org/coming-out-as-a-trans-ornon-binary-youth-sample-coming-out-letter-support-resources/ Compiled by Record-Journal staff.

Department of Defense Safe Helpline (Serving military individuals of all statuses) Call: 1-877-995-5247 Online chat option safehelpline.org/live-chat

SAMHSA (Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration) (Serving all ages) Call: 1-800-662-4357 Website: https://www.samhsa.gov

Remedy Live (Serving all ages) Text: 494949 Website / Online chat option: www.remedylive.com Housing and Homeless Services for Connecticut (Serving all ages) Call: 211 or 1-800-203-1234 Website: portal.ct.gov Search for Homeless Services Connecticut Department of Children and Families Careline (Reporting of child abuse/neglect) (Serving individuals reporting child abuse/neglect in Connecticut) Call: 1-800-842-2288 Website: portal.ct.gov/dcf Southington Youth Services (Serving youth in grades 6-12) Services: supportive counseling for grades 6-12, volunteer opportunities for 13-15 year olds, substance misuse prevention, parent education series, and mentoring.

Call: 860-276-6284 Email: youthservices@southington.org Website: www.southington.org Search for youth services Southington Bread For Life (Serving all ages) Services: food pantry, senior services, meal delivery, lunch/dinner program, Fuel For School (school snack program), children's summer program.

Call: 1-860-276-8389 Website: southingtonbreadforlife.org Email: Info@southingtonbreadforlife.org Southington-Cheshire Community YMCAs (Serving all ages) Services: health/wellness, sports performance and personal training, childcare, day camp, community outreach and special fundraising programs, financial assistance, diabetes prevention program, LIVESTRONG (cancer survivor program), youth sports/programs, teen programs, family activities, aquatic programs and swim team.

Call: 860-628-5597 Website: www.sccymca.org

Celebrate Diversity • Pride Month • June 10, 2021 | 13

LGBTQ+ LEADERSHIP

CT BAR GROUP

Continued from page 7

Continued from page 8

the only LGBTQ statewide candidate in 2018.

Andrew J. McDonald is an associate justice of the Connecticut Supreme Court. He previously served as a member of the Connecticut State Senate from 2003 to 2011, representing the state’s 27th district in Stamford and Darien as a Democrat.

affecting the LGBTQ community, whether it’s criminal defense, housing, employment, family.”

McDonald married Charles Gray in 2009. He is one of 10 LGBTQ+ state supreme court justices currently serving in the United States.

Joseph Grabarz, who served in the Connecticut House of Representatives from 1989 to 1993, was Connecticut’s first state legislator to come out as gay.

For more information about LGBTQ Section of the Connecticut Bar Association, visit www.ctbar.org Andrew J. McDonald, associate justice of the Connecticut Supreme Court.

history

LGBTQIA CENTERS

Continued from page 11

Continued from page 5 Teachers would stop me in the hallway and tell me how thankful they were we had started the club.

Students that I never met before would come up to me and say “thank you” — and I had finally felt as though I was making a difference. The year culminated with a trip to the UCONN conference called “True Colors” where GSA’s from all over the state share experiences and learn from each other.

I came home from the first True Colors conference sobbing. For the first time I was able to open up to my peers and explain to them the inner tumult I was going through, and the same was true for my classmates.

When I went to college at NYU I fully immersed myself in the New York City LGBTQIA culture.

I attended weekly drag shows, volunteered at LGBTQIA home-

less shelters, and even lived in an apartment above the legendary Stonewall Inn for a semester. I found my tribe and I was doing all that I could to support a community that had opened its arms to me.

Then Donald Trump got elected as the 45th President of the United States, and my community was under fire.

As he began rolling back rights, I saw firsthand my friends, coworkers, and peers begin to crumble under the weight of his policies. As things became more dire for those in the trans community, I began to notice an important pillar which stood between his discriminating policies and the people they were aimed at.

LGBTQIA community centers are so much more than what the name suggests. They not only create a

sense of safety in a community that is often targeted, but they provide valuable resources which otherwise would not be available. They provide STD/STI testing and HIV/ AIDS screenings. In some cases they can even provide housing for those who need it the most.

crimes related to a victim’s sexual identity to the existing definition of hate crimes.

The LGBTQIA community is resilient but, like any marginalized group, needs support from the communities they live in. Southington has done an excellent job at creating that sense of safety for those in the LGBTQIA community, and I hope many other towns follow suit. It is my wish that from this PRIDE issue, and the efforts going on by many local organizations, that we can generate LGBTQIA centers all over Connecticut to help address the growing needs that the community faces day-to-day.

2003

Continued from page 8

The first same sex ceremony Pomaszewski’s mother officiated was for two men. The couple lived in Washington, D.C., but was getting married in Middletown at one of their sister’s houses, she said, adding that a lot of weddings are done at private homes.

Another memorable ceremony was for a couple who came all the way from Alabama, where same sex marriage was not legal at the time. “The women also had their entourage follow—in three cars from Alabama,” said Pomaszewski.

The women were married on the beach in Old Saybrook.

Initially, Pomaszewski. and her mother created a ceremony specifically for same sex couples. However, “We found same sex couples didn’t want to be treated different,” Po-

2000 CT voted to allow same-sex civil unions.

Coretta Scott King calls on civil rights advocates to include gay rights in their efforts. Some criticized her for this position.

2004 First legal same sex marriage happens in Mass.

2011 Don't Ask Don't Tell was repealed

2015

SAME SEX MARRIAGE Pomaszewski said, “when they asked my mother if she would marry them, she would say, ‘sure.’ We are big believers in love. We wanted to be a part of it.”

nKorytnikova@record-journal.com 203-317-2444 Twitter: @n_korytnikova

maszewski said. “We found that everyone wanted the same thing. They wanted the traditional ceremony,” Pomaszewski said same sex couples want to choose between the traditional wedding vows; add or leave out portions, or some couples write their own vows. “Your wedding, your way,” is how Pomaszewski sums up the way her mother officiated and how she carries on.

“It just has to be meaningful to you.

Not a cookie-cutter ceremony but tailored to the person.”

Obergefell v. Hodges, Supreme Court Decision. The Court votes 5-4 that the fundamental right to marry is guaranteed to same-sex couples nationwide.

2016 Aug. 16, the U.S. Navy ship Harvey Milk is dedicated, the first named for an openly gay leader. Milk had served in the U.S. Navy during the Korean War aboard the submarine rescue ship USS Kittiwake (ASR13) and held the rank of lieutenant (junior grade) at the time of his honorable discharge.

– Record-Journal staff

14 | Celebrate Diversity • Pride Month • www.myrecordjournal.com/pride

OPINION

the question of fair play No need to take pre-emptive measures against transgender athletes

By Jeffery Kurz Record-Journal staff

grilled about the transgender issue during his nomination hearing.

When I was in high school my football team lost a game by the score of 44-0.

My thinking about it could be characterized as flummoxed, but that generalized uncertainty has gained some clarity thanks to a recent letter Clearly, we didn't belong on the to the editor by Lexie Farkash, of same field that day, but as I recall there were no calls for us to form our Wallingford. She also experienced own league or, better yet, for them to challenges as a student athlete, in her form their own league. Let's call it the case playing field hockey. "I know there will always be those who have league for overachieving jerks. a natural edge over me," she said.

Such lopsided results are far from She found the more proper response uncommon and take place every to be working harder, as opposed to year, all over the nation, all over the "insisting there be a separate league." world. It's an integral part of the The transgender population is small, whole wide world of sports. One of and the percentage of transgender the last games I saw in person, before athletes tiny, but the issue surroundthe pandemic, was a lopsided win by ing them has become huge. You Daniel Hand over Wethersfield. You could say it has hit a nerve. wonder how there's enough time in a high school football game to accom- As The Associated Press just recently reported, more than 20 states are modate such high scoring. fielding legislation that would ban There are all sorts of reasons for transgender girls from participatuneven outcomes, including size, ing with high school girls' sports speed, natural ability, coaching teams. "Yet in every case," says the skills - you can go on and on trying to report, "sponsors cannot cite a single explain it. instance in their own state or region Sometimes it seems to result from an where such participation has caused problems." unfair advantage.

That perspective was at play in Connecticut when transgender runners Terry Miller and Andraya Yearwood won 15 championship races over a couple years, sparking a lawsuit and a national conversation, to put it mildly.

It's the Connecticut case that has sparked the upsurge in proposed legislation. "It's their Exhibit A, and there's no Exhibit B - absolutely none," Shannon Minter, legal director for the National Center for Lesbian Rights, told the AP.

The new education secretary, Miguel Cardona (you don't need me to tell you he's from Meriden, right?), was

States are taking action as a preemptive measure. In one case, it's to counter the possibility that "the next generation of female athletes

in South Carolina may not have a chance to excel," as Rep. Ashley Trantham was quoted as saying. In Tennessee, the bill is necessary to be "proactive," said House Speaker Cameron Sexton.

This is a big response. Yet there's no "authoritative count" of the number of trans athletes who have competed in high school or college sports, according to the AP, and what count there is says it's minimal.

In her letter, Farkash talked about competing against players who had been playing since kindergarten, similar to my experience, and found that "instead of getting upset or insisting there be a separate league,

we embrace our diversity and train harder."

And, it's worth noting, as the AP did, that one of the Connecticut cisgender girls, Chelsea Mitchell, "defeated Terry Miller - the faster of the two trans sprinters - in their final two races in February 2020."

My own feeling when it comes to what's to come is that more worrisome competition will involve artificial intelligence. When it comes to human beings, the path toward acceptance and inclusiveness is the better way forward.

Jeffery Kurz is the Record-Journal’s editorial page editor. This column originally appeared on March 5, 2021.

Times are changing I write in response to the letter by Mr. Frank Milano Jr. on March 2 regarding the "fairness" of integrating transgender athletes with cisgender athletes and his resulting opposition to Dr. Cardona's nomination. I encourage Mr. Milano and residents who may feel similarly to consider the facts and implications.

First, there is no single biological factor that determines sex. Scientists have said this, advocates have repeated this, yet critics seem to ignore this when it's time to support discrimination.

Second, how exactly should we confirm the gender of each student-athlete, given that hormone levels and body-types naturally vary? Should referees pull down students' pants to verify before each game?

Finally, even if transgender women did have some magical athletic ability that outshone cisgender women - which, to be clear, they don't just 0.42% of the population is transgender (according to one survey). An even smaller number are transgender women. This is not some astronomical amount that will upend sports teams and suddenly dominate.

On a personal note, as a former student-athlete, I know there will always be those who have a natural edge over me. My stubby legs will never outrun those whose legs reach my eyebrows. Likewise, the difference between my high school in Wallingford playing field hockey against Cheshire was stark; one team had players who had been playing since kindergarten while my school, well, typically did not. Instead of getting upset or insisting there be a separate league, we embrace our diversity and train harder.

HAPPY PRIDE MONTH!

Times are changing and becoming more inclusive.

88 East Main St. Meriden | 03.235.3338 | jferryfh.com

R242037

Funeral Home

There will always be naysayers complaining about progress and shouting at the sky that the world is turning upside down. But I, for one, applaud Dr. Cardona for his compassion and dedication to students of all genders.

Lexie Farkash, Wallingford Originally published in the Record-Journal March 5, 2021.

Celebrate Diversity • Pride Month • June 10, 2021 | 15

Books, Movies, events & more Continued from page 7 Memorial,by Bryan Washington. A novel. A gay, African American man living with his Asian American lover in Texas, delivers an unexpected lesson in how little we really know ourselves Less, by Andrew Sean Greer. A Pulitzer Prize winning novel about a gay writer fleeing an invitation to the wedding of his ex to another man.

Boy Erased, by Garrard Conley. In his autobiography, Conley writes about his struggles after he is outed in college and his parents force him to attend a faith-based “school” to cure him.

Raising My Rainbow, by Lori Duron. The author and her family navigate the challenges and rewards of learning how to accept their gender-variant son into their home and community.

Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe, by Benjamin Saenz. A young adult novel that depicts the relationship between two Mexican-American teens who must overcome familial and societal cultural biases, and peer bullying.

October Mourning- A Song For Matthew Shephard, by Leslea Newman, who is also the author of Heather Has Two Mommies. Newman wrote 68 poems about an attack on Shephard, due to his sexual orientation, that led to his death.

Music Betty, by Taylor Swift. This song from Swift’s Foklore album is interpreted by some listeners as a gay anthem due to the ambiguity of lyrics that don’t specifically refer to the gender of the song’s characters who are involved in a love triangle.

You Need To Calm Down, by Taylor Swift. A song about the hate she has received for having gay friends. Considered by some listeners to be a gay acceptance anthem.

Same Love, by Macklemore. Written about Macklemore’s gay uncles and his own experience with sexuality, and as a rallying cry for the Marriage Equality Act. Born this way, by Lady Gaga. Written as a response to the repeal of Don’t Ask Don’t Tell, which allowed LGBTQ+ members of the armed forces to be out and proud. It’s about celebrating yourself no matter who you love and who you are.

A variety of songs by RuPaul: CoverGirl, Born Naked, Modern Love. RuPaul was the first drag superstar. He’s a musician and host of a popular television shows, RuPaul’s Drag Race, a drag competition show seen internationally.

Him, by Sam Smith. A boy’s experience with coming out and grappling with his religion at the same time.

Todos Me Miran, by Gloria Trevi. Spanish song about loving yourself the way you are. The song translates to literally mean “Everyone looks at me”.

Film Paris is Burning. Documentary about the drag/ gay underground culture in New York in the ‘80s. A pivotal time in LGBTQ+ history. Directed by Jennie Livingston.

RENT. New York in the ‘80s-’90s. This story of an apartment building and its tenants references AIDS, LGBTQ+ culture, and shines a light on people who were considered to be living on the “fringe” during the time. Cast includes Taye Diggs, Idina Menzel, Rosario Dawson, just to name a few. Directed by Chris Colombus.

Moonlight. A story about growing up Black and gay. Released in 2016, directed by Barry Jenkins MILK. The life and death of Harvey Milk, San Francisco’s first openly gay mayor. Directed by Gus Van Sant.

Carol. A story about two lesbian women in the 1950s. Directed by Todd Haynes How To Survive a Plague, by David France. Documentary film. An exploration of the AIDS epidemic.

Event

UConn True Colors Conference

This event brings together Gay/Straight Alliance groups from local schools and communities to focus on a wide variety of issues with workshops for students and teachers. Check it out at www. ourtruecolors.org/conference. and rainbowcenter. uconn.edu/true-colors-conference/#.

– Record-Journal staff

Students promote unity Continued from page 11 Peter Borzillo, Sheehan’s GSA club president, said students participating in “Day of Silence” go the entire school day without speaking and then at the final bell, they all gather to finally break the silence, which could be a collective scream or simply conversation.

This day symbolizes how silenced members in the community feel and to give those not in the community a symbolic glimpse into their life.

“It’s less about trying to force our beliefs” Borzillo said. “We are just trying to promote an atmosphere where people feel safe and accepted.”

Cheshire Academy offers LBGTQIA student clubs and groups on campus. The focus of the groups is determined each year by club members and student leaders. One year, they focused on pride through arts activities, said Julie Anderson, head of school. The club has also focused on other issues, including microaggression or how to garner support.

“Everyone is on a different place in their journey,” said Anderson.

Anderson said the school encourages language and norms that are inclusive. She cites examples such as using the term “partners” and “family” and not husband or wife or mom and dad. In another instance, students wanted a change to the dress code, to make it gender neutral. The protocol of girls wearing skirts or dresses and boys wearing blazers and shirts was changed.

“It’s really (about) listening and understanding how the world is changing, and how we need to be supportive,” Anderson said. fwilliams@record-journal.com 203-317-2373 Twitter: @faith_williams2 Joy VanderLek contributed to this story.

16 | Celebrate Diversity • Pride Month • www.myrecordjournal.com/pride

MXCC STUDENTS PROMOTE EQUALITY, ACCEPTANCE & KNOWLEDGE

MIDDLESEX COMMUNITY COLLEGE

Your College • Your Future mxcc.edu

860-343-5719/ 866-526-6008 (toll-free) 100 Training Hill Road, Middletown, CT

“While I was never a member of SPEAK, I did always appreciate the ally trainings SPEAK would do. Especially when they created an atmosphere where it felt safe to ask any honest questions you have and not be judged on it.”

— Benjamin Palazzo, MxCC class of 2016

R242019

M

iddlesex Community College (MxCC) LGBTQ+ students have found safe space with like-minded individuals through many supportive programs and activities as they navigate through their collegiate experiences.

For more than a decade, the campus club SPEAK (Students Promoting Equality, Acceptance and Knowledge) has brought LGBTQ+ students together with each other, staff members and alumni. The primary purpose of the club is to provide support and assistance to those within the gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender and questioning community and allies who seek it.

“Middlesex Community College gives SPEAK members participated me a chance to stay connected with in events such as the Connecticut the queer community, to contribute to Health Information Management a student union that is both diverse Association Conference, where and inclusive, and for that I am they presented a panel about immensely grateful. Having queer role models such as the club advisors, how LGBTQ+ individuals face allows me to put my trust in this difficulty when giving information college, live authentically, and have related to health matters. the peace of mind to excel in my In 2019, SPEAK and college academic endeavors.” community members marched — Josh Rushworth, in the state’s first Pride parade, SPEAK president, manufacturing which took place in Middletown.

“MxCC gave me a place to feel The group is also appearing in like I wasn’t broken or that I Middletown’s 2021 virtual parade on June 5. The club regularly conducts needed to be fixed for who I ally trainings, drag events, dances, Karaoke nights, fundraisers as well as was. It expanded my worldview participates in the True Colors youth event at UConn each year. In 2018, to different orientations and MxCC hosted the Connecticut State College and University (CSCU) Pride identities, and made them Conference, an all-day forum with workshops, discussions, networking and more normalized to myself and entertainment. others.”

Last year, the college formally established the Diversity, Equity and Inclusion — Marina Capezzone, Council to reaffirm its commitment for maintaining a campus environment MxCC class of 2018 where all are valued, respected and included. Register now for summer and fall classes at mxcc.edu