11 minute read
SERVING OTHERS
By Steve Swigert
So what is kindness? Kindness can be defined by the sincere and voluntary use of one’s time, talent, and resources to better the lives of others, one’s own life, and the world through genuine acts of love, compassion, generosity, and service. Why is it important to be kind to each other? Because acts of kindness have the potential to make the world a better place. With all the things going on in the U.S. and the world, we could all use a big dose of kindness on a regular basis. Kindness is more than a behavior though, kindness means having a spirit of helpfulness, as well as being generous and considerate, and doing so without expecting anything in return. The act of giving kindness often is simple, free, positive and healthy and it helps us as well.
• It’s good for the body
Kindness has been shown to increase self-esteem, empathy and compassion, and improve mood. It can decrease blood pressure and cortisol which is a stress hormone that directly impacts stress levels. People who give of themselves through acts of kindness also tend to be healthier and live longer. Kindness can increase your sense of connectivity with others, which can directly impact loneliness, improve low mood and enhance relationships in general. It also can be contagious. Looking for ways to show kindness can give you a focus, especially if you tend to be anxious or stressed in some social situations.
• It’s good for the mind
Physiologically, kindness can positively change your brain. Being kind boosts serotonin and dopamine, which are neurotransmitters in the brain that give you feelings of satisfaction and well-being, and cause the pleasure/reward centers in your brain to light up. Endorphins, which are your body’s natural pain killer, also can be released. “He has told you, O man, what is good; and what does the Lord require of you but to do justice, and to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God?”
- Micah 6:8
The Good News: All that the Lord hopes of his followers is to act out of kindness and love.
• Be kind to yourself
It is not just how you treat other people — it is how you extend those same behaviors and intentions to yourself as well. Reducing stress and preventing illness helps you live longer. I believe you can be kinder in your own self-talk and practice gratitude. People are good at verbally beating themselves up, and rarely does that work as a pep talk.
Rather, negativity often causes you to unravel and may even create a vicious cycle of regularly getting down on yourself. You wouldn't talk to your neighbor the way you sometimes talk to yourself. This is what I call the “good neighbor policy,” which can be helpful. If you would not say it to your good neighbor, do not say it about yourself. I will tell you that one of the best examples of kindness and spreading kindness comes from a young lady and her family in Georgia. Her name is Jordyn. Jordyn’s parents, Ben and Jackie were raised in my hometown, a very small community in Missouri and our families were friends. Over 4 years ago, I found out that Ben and Jackie had created a T-shirt project for Jordyn, because Jordyn was about to get out of high school. She had limited adult job opportunities because she has autism. With this T-shirt project, Jordyn was able to develop job skills of rolling shirts, adding wristbands, and signs/stamps thank you notes. What started out to be a project to sell 40 shirts to family has turned out to be a family business that has sent items to all 50 states with every shirt sold having this on it, • “Be Kind to Everyone” So if you have seen a T-shirt, with these words “Be Kind to Everyone” on it, more than likely it came from Georgia and it came from Jordyn. If you would like to learn more, of course, you can find them at bekindtoeveryone.com If Jordyn and her family can do that, what can we do to show kindness and promote others into doing to same thing. Just think back to the last time someone was kind to you. How did it make you feel? Now think about when you were kind to someone else. Remember how you felt in both situations. The beauty of kindness is that it feels just as good to receive it as it does to practice it. Sadly, in today’s fast-paced world many of us are so busy trying to keep up that we lose sight of what’s truly important. As we’re looking down at our phones and browsing social media, we’re walking by the mom with her stroller struggling to open the door, or the wallet that fell out of the man’s pocket a few feet ahead. Opportunities to be kind are all around us – and the smallest acts of kindness are often what make the biggest difference.
HERE ARE SIX SCIENCE-BACKED BENEFITS OF PRACTICING KINDNESS:
• Increases happiness
When it comes to kindness and happiness, there is a “positive feedback loop.” Researchers found “people in general felt happier when they were asked to remember a time they bought something for someone else—even happier than when they remembered buying something for themselves. This happiness boost was the same regardless of whether the gift cost $20 or $100.” Furthermore, the happier participants felt about their past generosity, the more likely they were in the present to choose to spend on someone else instead of themselves.
• Reduces anxiety and depression
“When we give of ourselves, especially if we start
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Be Kind
young, everything from life satisfaction to self-realization and physical health is significantly improved. Mortality is delayed. Depression is reduced. Well-being and good fortune are increased,” according to research from Stephen Post of Case Western Reserve University School of Medicine.
• Lowers blood pressure
Did you know acts of kindness can also protect your heart? Dr. David R. Hamilton, explains that practicing kindness produces oxytocin, a hormone that releases nitric oxide, which expands blood vessels – and as a result, lowers blood pressure.
• Reduces pain
When you practice kindness, endorphins – the body’s natural painkillers - are released in your brain. There’s a reason they call it the “helper’s high.” Being kind does, in fact, feel good. Researchers at the National Institutes of Health found “the same area of the brain that is activated in response to food or sex (namely, pleasure) lit up when the participants in the study thought about giving money to a charity.”
• Promotes longevity
Dr. Carter explains, “People who volunteer tend to experience fewer aches and pains. Giving help to others protects overall health twice as much as aspirin protects against heart disease.” Even more fascinating, “people 55 and older who volunteer for two or more organizations have an impressive 44% lower likelihood of dying early, and that’s after sifting out every other contributing factor, including physical health, exercise, gender, habits like smoking, marital status and many more. This is a stronger effect than exercising four times a week or going to church,” Carter adds. So if you are not already practicing acts of kindness. Here are a few simple ways to get started. 1. Smile - Even something as simple as a smile can make someone’s day. Did you know the simple act of smiling releases endorphins and “feel good” chemicals that are scientifically-proven to reduce pain and elevate mood? 2. Give up your seat on the train to someone standing - Whether it’s an elderly person or the woman in high heels who has been standing for 20 minutes, choose to be kind and offer your seat to someone in need. 3. Tell your loved ones how much you care - Even when we know someone loves us, it’s always nice to hear it. Take a minute to send your significant other a sweet text or leave your grandma a voicemail that shows you’re thinking about her. 4. Forgive the driver with road rage - Instead of taking it personally and responding to anger with anger, choose to be kind. Let it go. Chances are that person is having a bad day and could use a little kindness and compassion. 5. Give your coworker a genuine compliment - Surprise your coworker with a compliment, and make sure it comes from the heart. What makes this person unique? What qualities do you admire about them? Try to make the compliment more meaningful rather than superficial. 6. Practice active listening when someone is talking to you - Are you a good listener? Many of us think that we are listening, when, the truth is we are planning what to say next, eager for our turn to speak. Active listening means focusing entirely on what the other person is saying, processing it and coming up with a thoughtful response. We all want to be heard and understood. Practice kindness by giving someone the gift of truly listening. 7. Say “thank you” more often - Expressing appreciation is an easy way to show kindness. Whether it’s your spouse or your coworker, saying “thank you” can strengthen your relationships. 8. Hold the door open - Always glance behind you. It could be holding the door for someone rushing to get on to the train, or another tenant in your building with arms full of groceries – whoever it may be, holding the door open is a simple, kind gesture that everyone appreciates. 9. Put some coins in someone else’s parking meter or pay for someone coffee in the line behind you. - Random acts of kindness don’t always need to be seen. The kindest gestures are the often the ones you do when nobody is watching. 10. Leave someone a surprise note or card - You would be surprised how much a difference it will make in the day of a colleague or co-corker. • Indeed, kindness not only makes others happy. It
uplifts your spirit too. Just think of the last time you've done a random act of kindness.
“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.”
