Jakiah: 30 something, black, trans and beautiful. She is the conversation around passibility.
Genevieve: 50 something, Jakiah's mother. A woman on the edge of grief and the beginning of pride
"Yet I have loved Jacob,but Esau I have hated, and I have turned his hill country into a wasteland and left his inheritance to the desert jackals.”
Malachi 1:2-3 1
Sound Cue: (An 80's gospel choir song plays gently in the background. Should sound like Tramaine Hawkins- Goin up Yonder. A spoon swirls inside a glass 7 times. The spoon tap, tap, taps. Music cuts at the end of third tap.)
GENEVIEVE:
JAKIAH:
GENEVIEVE:
JAKIAH:
GENEVIEVE: ...Well are you gonna open it?
JAKIAH:
Not yet. Not sure I want to. I uhmmm... I'm not sure why you want me to.
GENEVIEVE: (Chuckles)
Oh! I don't. If it was up to me, your brother...
JAKIAH: You want some coffee?
GENEVIEVE:
Thats all you got to say?
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JAKIAH: Mama, its not even noon yet. If I'm gonna hear I aint shit, I'd rather do it with coffee.
GENEVIEVE: ... yes please.
Sound cue: Chair pushes back and we hear the sounds of coffee being poured.
JAKIAH: You still take it the same way? light as a paperbag...
GENEVIEVE: ... sweet as can be.
JAKIAH: All that sugar is not good for you.
GENEVIEVE: You're one to talk...
JAKIAH: ... (She takes a seat.) So, what's all this?
Sound cue: A chair being pulled back
Genevieve takes a beat
GENEVIEVE: Couple days ago, a lawyer comes by. A, Mr Sawyer or something. Same lawyer your father...
JAKIAH I remember him Mama
GENEVIEVE: ... used. Oh you do? That's funny. How somebody who hasn't seen home in five years remember a lawyer I've only seen once?
JAKIAH says nothing... loudly
GENEVIEVE: (CONT'D) You know... Last year when your father died,I thought I'd never get out of bed. I couldn't eat. Couldn't sleep. Used to just lay around wishing for something to take me out. Every corner held him. Every room contained him.
(MORE)
GENEVIEVE: (CONT'D)
It was like all that I was just to tell my body to breathe in and out. Your father was the first man I ever... We were kids together. Met him on the first day of high school. Just a sideways grin and a pair of arms. He was something... and you know he come right up to me? "Hey, I'm Carlos." Had me right there. Cocky. Always that grin. You know your grandmother hated him. Said he didn't come from nothing and wouldn't be nothing. Married him within a year. And the look on her face when we started that first church. Your father, The Head Pastor! And he made me a first lady. Not just another Jack and Jill debutante with a pretty face. He made me into something! He wasn't perfect but he loved me. And he wanted a son. Your father wanted a son. We had two! God took one. You took the other. You know the doctor said I wouldn't be able to have kids? We struggled for years and then! Identical twins! A miracle! I thanked God everyday for you and your brother. And when you left, your brother worked double to help us forget the pain you caused. And when your father was lowered into the ground, your brother was the one held my hand and helped me stand without falling at the graveside. And now him... he's... This is what I have left (She indicates the box on the table). This is all I have. This is all I have left of your brother Elijah. So imagine my horror when some sharp nosed white man comes to my house and informs me that everything in this box can only be retrieved by you. He said there are three items. Three items for you and I... to share. And so... open it.
Sound cue: A medium moving box is pushed
Jakiah stands, she sits, she stands again.
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JAKIAH: No.
GENEVIEVE: I'm sorry. Come again?
JAKIAH: No. I won't.
GENEVIEVE: Listen to me.../
JAKIAH:
Nah.You listen to me. I have spent years listening to you. It's funny. People always feel so free! Free to tell you what they think of you and NEVER stop to ask what you think of them. Never wanna hear the truth!
GENEVIEVE:
Well I'll be! You come into my home dressed in my clothes play acting like a... woman, talking about the truth!
JAKIAH: I'm not playing!
GENEVIEVE:
Well you ain't no woman. It's funny. I uhh, I used to pretend like I didn't see you imitating me in the mirror when I would put on my makeup. Pretend not to notice you spent a little too much time looking at the men in the magazines. I even seen your little androgynous clothes. Your brother would pretend they were some leftovers from the little girls I would see him sneak and out of here. But I knew. I knew they were yours. You have no shame. You don't know shame. The shame I felt about your abomination. How it felt when the women at church said...
JAKIAH: That! Right there. You didn't care about me leaving. Not why, not where, not at all. You cared about what "they" said!It was always about the "they's" Mama. (MORE)
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JAKIAH: (CONT'D)
But I couldn't stay here and lie to myself for you or for anybody! And who cares?! Who the fuck cares what that mean old bitches say?!
GENEVIEVE: Foul mouth! Nasty mouth!
JAKIAH:
I don't care! It's my mouth. You care so much what comes out of it but not what goes in it...
Genevieve slaps her
Sound Cue: Slapping sound effect. Not mild, but not for blood
JAKIAH: (CONT'D)
This is stupid. This was a waste. I came back here because on his deathbed Elijah asked me to come home. Said that he was sorry to me. That YOU needed me. Your husb...
GENEVIEVE Don't you talk about my Husband.
JAKIAH: (She laughs)... Memory is a funny thing. There's holes where truth should be. Love that for you... You want me to open this box?
GENEVIEVE: What?
JAKIAH: Do you want me to open this box?
GENEVIEVE: What?
JAKIAH: Do YOU want ME to OPEN this BOX?
GENEVIEVE: Yes. (Her teeth click so hard, they might break).
JAKIAH: How about a trade?
GENEVIEVE: What do you want?
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JAKIAH: You said there are things in the box that you want. I will give them to you but only if we agree to tell the truth!
GENEVIEVE: What?!
JAKIAH:
Deal or no deal? This is a one time only offer. Think hard.
(Genevieve thinks. She decides)
GENEVIEVE: deal. You're a bitch.
JAKIAH: Nope. Just the daughter of one.
Sound cue: Jakiah opens the box.
Sound cue: She sighs
Sound cue: wool blanket being pulled from the box. Fingers running over the soft nape
GENEVIEVE:
Hm. You don't how you broke your father when you told us about the "Woman" that you are. How it killed something in him to think that he had created something defective. When you left home to go be your true self, he threw out everything. Everything. And you don't know what that did to me. I didn't have anything left of y...(She stops). I wasn't soft and I wasn't gentle with you. But I... anyway, that night I took this out of the trash and hid it in your brothers room.
JAKIAH: You kept this?
GENEVIEVE: Yeah.
JAKIAH: Why?
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GENEVIEVE:
You hate me. But I've never hated you. Please give me that blanket
Sound cue: Jakiah scoffs.
Sound cue: We hear her reach into the box again
JAKIAH scoffs and hands it over. This is downright clinical. JAKIAH pulls out the next item. It is a children's bible. Well used and it is pink.
Sound cue: the sound of pages flipping. Stop. Flipping again.
JAKIAH:
I remember this. I remember this. First weapon ever formed against me. I begged for this bible and I remember Daddy...
GENEVIEVE: Your father was so mad when I got it. Said Boys don't wear pink. Don't play with dolls. Said that something was wrong with you.
JAKIAH:
I heard. I remember. And you bought it anyway. (She laughs) Why?
Sound cue: page flipping abruptly stops
GENEVIEVE:
You talk about the truth. You want everybody to know you. To see you! Jacob... Jakiah. I have always seen you. And you. You arrogant little shit. You never looked around to see me. You walk around here in your brand new skin, with your beautiful outfits and my face and you never once considered that I loved WHO you were. You act like I have no right to the child of my womb. But I do and I did!
JAKIAH: But I'm right here MAMA!
GENEVIEVE:
And YOU LEFT! You ran across the country and hid like somebody did something to you other then say they who loved you were!
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JAKIAH:
I wanted you to love who I am! This is who I am! And you're right. I didn't stay and consider your feelings. I didn't wanna hear you say you were disappointed. Or you were angry or anything like that. I just wanted to live. As me. Whole. I am not defective or broken or small. I am happy. Every day. Everyday I wake up and I put on my clothes and look at your face in my mirror but how would you recognize her? It's your face without the shadow of regret or disappointment. Its YOUR face but with pride. And I am complete. I came back here because I thought maybe now... Maybe you would see that I'm all you have left and embrace me. But no. No, you're still the same. I asked for truth right? Only fair I share some with you. The night I left...
GENEVIEVE: Stop this.
JAKIAH: No no. Too late. The night I left...
JAKIAH:
Daddy touched me! Said how could I know that I was a woman if I never... And he pushed me down. I was so shocked and he lifted my skirt and he...
GENEVIEVE Stop this please!
GENEVIEVE
Stop this. Stop this please (she turns away. She can't unsee this.)
JAKIAH: Bent me right over this table. If Elijah hadn't come in when he did... Elijah didn't work twice as hard to make up for me leaving. He worked hard to stay away from this house and your husband. Your husband tried to rape me. Look at me Mama!
GENEVIEVE: ...
JAKIAH: LOOK AT ME MAMA!! (Genevieve) Am (MORE)
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JAKIAH: (CONT'D)
I lying? I'm the child of your womb. Look at me in my eyes. Am I lying?
GENEVIEVE: You're lying.
JAKIAH:
Elijah knew you'd say that. (She tosses the letter down the table).It's all there. He wrote it down and had the lawyer notarize it. I was there. I came home for the funeral and sat in the back! I wish you could've seen it in my eyes. All of those holier than thou church hens weeping and gnashing their teeth like yall Martin Luther Fucking King. And Elijah saw me! Came right over and grabbed me before I could run out. Said he was gonna tell you that day and that I needed to be there. But I made him promise not to. Because I do see you. Who Daddy was pretending to be mattered more than who he really was. But Elijah wouldn't let it go so he took his confession right over to Mister Sawyer and put pen to paper because he knew what I knew. That at the end of the day the only religion you really respected wasn't God the Father it was Daddy, YOUR HUSBAND. So Go ahead First Lady. Read it for yourself.
Genevieve's hands shake as she picks up the envelope.
Sound cue: Envelope opening. The sound of a woman gently weeping.
She reads it and almost immediately tosses it across the room as though it were snakes in her hand. She mewls. Like a wounded animal. A contrast in horror and pain.
GENEVIEVE: You should've.. JAKIAH
What? Told you? Would you have believed me?
Genevieve is quiet for a beat too long.
JAKIAH: Didn't think so.... I'm tired. (MORE)
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JAKIAH: (CONT'D) I'm gonna go lay down. I'm sorry about Elijah. I loved him too. And I wish he was here. But I'm still here Mama. Difficult... but here.
GENEVIEVE:
Jakiah, I... (Will she apologize? IS this it?)... I am your mother. (A statement. A wall. A demand)
JAKIAH:
Yeah. You are.
Sound cue: A chair pushes back from the table. Stilletos click away as the soft sound of weeping continues. 80's gospel choir music comes back on. (Should sound like Goin' up yonderTramaine Hawkins)
Jakiah leaves the table. Genevieve is left with her box, her regrets and her memories.
