QSaltLake Magazine - 298 - April 18, 2019

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APRIL 18, 2019 VOL. 16 • ISSUE 298 QSALTLAKE.COM

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LDS CHURCH BACKTRACKS ON SAME-SEX MARRIAGE APOSTASY, BAPTISM OF CHILDREN OF LGBT PARENTS

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Pride SPECTACULAR CELEBRATING 50 YEARS OF STONEWALL Join us for an evening celebrating Utah’s past and present LGBTQ+ heroes.

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ARTISTS OF BALLET WEST | PHOTO BY BEAU PEARSON

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publisher/editor Michael Aaron

ASSISTANT editor Tony Hobday NATIONAL NEWS editor Craig Ogan designer Christian Allred sales Ken Stowe, 801-997-9763 x1 sales@qsaltlake.com contributors Joshua Adamson Pickett, Diane Anderson-Minshall, Chris Azzopardi, Paul Berge, Jeff Berry, Paul Campbell, Laurie Bennett-Cook, Stephen Dark, Jennifer Dobner, Mikki Enoch, Jack Fertig, Greg Fox, Charles Lynn Frost, Oriol Gutierrez Jr., John Hales, Ryan Haymore, Tony Hobday, Joshua Jones, Christopher Katis, Rock Magen, Sam Mills, Craig Ogan, Mikey Rox, Terri Schlichenmeyer, Gregg Shapiro, Petunia Pap Smear, Steven Petrow, Ed Sikov, JoSelle Vanderhooft, Ben ­Williams, D’Anne ­Witkowski distribution Bradley Jay Crookston,

RJ Graham publisher

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QSaltLake Magazine is a trademark of Salt Lick Publishing, LLC., Q Media Group Copyright © 2019, Salt Lick Publishing, LLC. All rights reserved. No material may be reprinted or reproduced without written permission from the publisher. 8–12,000 copies are distributed free of charge at over 300 locations across the state. Free copies are limited to one per person. For additional copies, call 801-997-9763. It is a crime to dispose of current issues or otherwise interfere with the distribution of this magazine. Printed in the USA on recycled paper.

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April 26 - 27, 2019 | 7:30 pm Highland High School, SLC, UT General Admission $20

Tickets are valid for any night, and are available from choir members, Club Try-Angles, and online at brownpapertickets.com Dennis McCracken, Artistic Director

6 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | FIRST WORD

from the publisher

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Issue 298 | APRIL 18, 2019

Deciding to dance the dance

BY MICHAEL AARON

Looking back, on the memory of The dance we shared beneath the stars above……

I’d never

considered this before, but I think that deciding on a presidential candidate to support early in the game is similar to those first moments of dating and wondering if this is the right person for you.

You have two main choices — turn tail and run because of the possibility they are not the right one for you, or “dance the dance” and see where it takes you.

For a moment all the world was right…

So it is, for me, with deciding whether to join Team Pete. He officially announced this week and there is much excitement about his candidacy.

On the one hand, wow! An openly gay candidate with significant “legs” entering the race. He polls at third place behind powerhouse (and old-school) candidates Joe Biden and Bernie Sanders. He’s young and fresh, smart, personable, right on most of my important issues, and looks good. Kind of a gay activist’s dream candidate.

How could I have known you’d ever say goodbye…

On the other hand, what are his chances of actually beating Donald Trump? Yes, the t-shirt helping pronounce his last name, Buttigieg, as “Boot-A-Trump” is cute enough that I want one in every color, but can he?

Will middle America and the needed swing independents and moderate Republicans go so far as to vote for an unapologetic gay man? That they did so for a certain unapologetic black man Barack Obama gives me hope, but have we progressed that far at this point?

And now I’m glad I didn’t know…

Frankly, I have decided none of the latter matters.

Imagine all of the good that can come out of having an openly gay candidate with such great charisma and ideas in the national spotlight for however long he can ride this wave.

The way it all would end the way it all would go…

And, who knows, if we start the support early and keep it strong, how far this campaign can go?

Our lives are better left to chance I could have missed the pain…

Some may say I’m choosing a candidate solely because he’s gay, and I will admit that there is some truth to that. But there is also the truth that supporting an strong LGBTQ candidate can do a world of good, even if that good doesn’t end up living in the White House.

So, for this guy at this moment, I’ve decided to go to the Pete Prom and “dance the dance.”

But I’d have to miss the dance. Q Thanks Garth Brooks and songwriter Tony Arata for “The Dance.”

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news The top national and world news since last issue you should know

BY CRAIG OGAN

In Chicago, lesbians rule This is what equality looks like: Lori Lightfoot, a former federal prosecutor, was elected mayor of Chicago defeating city Democrat party chair Toni Preckwinkle, 74 to 26 percent.

She ran as a reformer in an apocryphally corrupt city.

Members of the city council have been indicted for bribery, the Smollett hate-crime hoax — and cover-up, police shootings, a burgeoning murder rate were all issues that helped defeat the “machine” candidate.

One issue that’s clearly not an issue was Lightfoot’s sex life. She is married to Amy Eshleman. The couple is raising a daughter. Other Midwest cities re-elected out-and-proud candidates: in Madison, Wisconsin, Satya Rhodes-Conway beat the incumbent; and in Kansas City, Mo., Jolie Justus advanced from the primary to general election.

Equality Act gets hearing The U.S. Congress is holding the first-ever hearing on the Equality Act. The legislation guarantees LGBT nondiscrimination under the 1964 landmark Civil Rights Act. The act has major support from 180 name-brand businesses though the Human Rights Campaign’s Business Coalition for the Equality Act. Polls show 70 percent of

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Americans support any legislation with the word “equality” in the title. Congress will hear testimony from LGBT grievance-industry professionals, LGBT supporting churches, university law professionals and diversity officers, and the obligatory personal stories of discrimination.

Not invited to testify is former Log Cabin chief executive Gregory Angelo, who wrote an op-ed for a conservative newspaper, saying, “Don’t be fooled by the name: The Equality Act is legislation that would compromise American civil rights and religious liberty as we know it.”

N. Carolina congressional nominee still hot on the pot North Carolina’s 9th congressional election was not decided in 2018 due to charges of voting fraud. The Republican in the race, who was ahead by a few votes, dropped out and will “re-run” this summer. The polls say the favorite to replace him on the “R Line” is the state legislator who sponsored North Carolina HB2, which banned transgender people from using the bathroom of their identified gender.

The law led to a backlash, from canceled concerts to loss of the NBA All-Stars game.

The law was largely modified, but remained objectionable to transgender activists. The legislator does not apologize for his support for the bill, rather is ratcheting up partisan rhetoric. His ads call Democrats “socialists” and “gun grabbers” who support “infanticide and open borders.” No mention of bathrooms, yet.

A tease does not please A couple of late-Victorian bachelors sit around in dressing gowns drinking tea in a fabulous London flat. Some fans of Sherlock Holmes and

Dr. John Watson thought (or hoped) they were lovers.

According to Martin Freeman, Dr. Watson to Benedict Cumberbatch’s Sherlock Holmes on the PBS-aired series said a “writers’ tease” ticked off some fans when the series didn’t have a “gay” ending. The updated portrayal toyed with the sexual nature of the relationship.

There was tongue-in-cheek humor, with other characters often assuming they were a gay couple. Fans assumed the show runners would end the series, “Where we held hands off into the sunset together,” says Freeman.

That scenario didn’t occur and the production company got complaints of disappointment and “betrayal”. With another season in the offering, gay hope, as it does at midnight on Grindr, can spring eternal.

Adoption in Michigan A deal between the ALCU and the Michigan Attorney General requires faith-based adoption agencies, receiving state money, to help gay and lesbian people adopt. A lesbian couple were refused services by Catholic Charities and Bethany Christian Services, so they sued.

Michigan, like most states, contracts with private agencies to place children with adoptive parents. The two services averaged 25 to 30 percent of the state’s foster care adoptions.

No ‘Call Me by Your Name’ 2, yet A sequel to Call Me by Your Name, a straight-washed movie about a gay relationship, is happening — at least in book form. André Aciman’s Find Me picks up where the book and movie left off. The age-significant lovers Elio and Oliver have moved on.

Elio is now a gifted clas-

Issue 298 | APRIL 18, 2019

sical pianist and Oliver is a professor in the U.S., with sons. A movie sequel is in the talks, but the actor who played Oliver, Armie Hammer, talks it down, saying, “I think we’re setting ourselves up for disappointment.”

Sylvester, one for the books An out, proud and loud 1980s artist, Sylvester, has a song inducted into the National Recording Registry at the Library of Congress. Annually, the registry adds 25 American recordings that are at least 10 years old, selecting works with “cultural, historical, or aesthetic” significance. One of this year’s 25 was Sylvester’s, “You Make Me Feel (Mighty Real)” recorded in 1978.

Sylvester passed away in 1988 due to complications related to HIV.

VIP too important for ID, bar punished Washington DC’s former mayor and current city council member, Vincent Gray, was tossed out of the DC Eagle after refusing to show his driver license to the door person.

He thought his city councilor ID, which didn’t show his age, was sufficient for entry.

In a scene witnessed often in Utah, the 75-year-old politico, when challenged to use ID showing age, said, “Don’t I look old enough?” The bouncer pushed him out the door and the councilor fell and

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suffered minor injuries.

After Gray’s complaint, the bar’s liquor license was suspended for a week and the owners fined $2,000. Plus, the bouncer was fired.

San Antonio hates Chick-fil-A Hope you are not in the San Antonio airport if you are “jonesing” for waffle fries and a chicken sandwich from Chick-fil-A. The city council is banning the chain from the airport, which has long been criticized for making donations to anti-gay organizations.

The city council member, in proposing the ban, said that San Antonio is a city of compassion where everyone “has a place and we do not have room in our public facilities for a business with a legacy of anti-LGBTQ behavior.”

The company has tried to downplay comments from its founder about marriage equality, but in 2017, Chick-fil-A made donations to groups not favored by LGBT activists.

The Texas attorney general sent a letter to the city that his office would investigate whether the a ban violates any laws about religious liberty.

He also asked the U.S. Department of Transportation to look into the matter.

Brunei stones sodomy Several crimes, like having a baby out of wedlock, missing prayers, or promoting religions other than Islam will face lesser fines and go into effect immediately. Stoning and stiffer punishments for other crimes were left to be implemented at a later date.

“The decision to implement the penal code is not for fun but is to obey Allah’s command as written in the Quran,” Prime Minister Hassanal Bolkiah said.

The country has 400,000

residents, with two-thirds being Muslim. According to UN High Commission for Human Rights, under international law, stoning is considered torture and is cruel, inhumane, degrading treatment and is prohibited.

Enough trope to hang themselves Sean Hannity wasn’t the first media person to make tired trope that presidential candidate Pete Buttigieg’s married partner would be “First Lady”, rather it came from the long time stalwart of gay and lesbian media, the Advocate.

The magazine headlined a hagiography of the two South Benders with “Chasten Buttigieg Would Be the Best ‘First Lady’ of Twitter”.

In the article, the writer wrote, “And as his self-proclaimed ‘underdog’ husband continues to capture the hearts of many Americans, we decided to round up a few of our favorite tweets from the man who may become the first male-identified ‘First Lady’ ever.”

Another dumb gay question, this time Buzz Feed asked Mayor Buttigieg, “Do you think President James Buchanan was gay,” and was answered with “my gaydar has never been very good.” Nice to hear a presidential candidate say, “My gaydar,” though.

NEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 9

Call Wharton O’Brien Law

More progress on HIV Surgeons at the Johns Hopkins Hospital have transplanted a kidney from a living HIV-positive donor to an HIV-positive recipient, a medical breakthrough they think will expand the pool of available organs for transplants. The procedure is a large step from the days HIV diagnosis was considered a death sentence. Q

Wharton O’Brien, PLLC 165 S Main Street, Suite 200 Salt Lake City, Utah 84111 chriswhartonlaw.com

10 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | NEWS

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LDS Church backtracks on same-sex marriage apostasy and blessings, baptisms of children with LGBT parents The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints announced on the first day of its Spring Conference that it was reversing its 2015 policy that deemed people in same-sex marriages as “apostates” and forbidding children of such marriages from blessing or baptism until age 18, and only after disavowing support for same-sex marriage or cohabitation.

LDS President Dallin Oaks is quoted as having said the announcement was intended to “help affected families” and “to reduce the hate and contention so common today.”

Children of LGBT parents may now be blessed as infants and baptized after their eitghth birthday.

The 2015 policy caused contention among members of the church, and many felt it punished children. At least 1,000 members protested in Salt Lake City and formally resigned their membership after the 2015 announcement.

In January of 2016, Russell M. Nelson said in a worldwide speech that Thomas S. Monson received instructions regarding same-sex couples directly from God. The announcement this week was made on MormonNewsroom.com. Excerpts follow: President Russell M. Nelson reflected that throughout this past year, the Lord has blessed them with “revelation upon revelation, knowledge upon knowledge … that which bringeth joy, that which bringeth life eternal.”

President Nelson taught of ministering and repenting, sharing that as we embrace the gift of repentance we will rise up and minister in a holier way and make our homes centers of gospel learning. Israel will be gathered on both sides of the veil, and we will help in preparing the world for the Second Coming of Jesus Christ.

Possibly refuted by many non-Mormons, President Dallin H. Oaks was instructed this morning by the First Presidency that the Gospel of Jesus Christ teaches us to love and treat all people with kindness and civility — even when we disagree. God has promised all blessings to those who strive to keep His commandments, and we have a duty to

“bear one another’s burdens that they may be light.”

Oaks’ burgeoning on: “While we cannot change the Lord’s doctrine, we want our members and our policies to be considerate of those struggling with the challenges of mortality.”

“Effective immediately, children of parents who identify themselves as [LGBT] may be baptized without First Presidency approval if the custodial parents give permission for the baptism and understand both the doctrine that a baptized child will be taught and the covenants he or she will be expected to make.

“A nonmember parent or parents (including LGBT parents) can request that their baby be blessed by a worthy Melchizedek Priesthood holder. These parents need to understand that congregation members will contact them periodically, and that when the child who has been blessed reaches 8 years of age, a Church member will contact them and propose that the child be baptized.

“Previously, our Handbook characterized same-gender marriage by a member as apostasy. While we still consider such a marriage to be a serious transgression, it will not be treated as apostasy for purposes of Church discipline. Instead, the immoral conduct in heterosexual or homosexual relationships will be treated in the same way.”

Accordingly, the announced policies “should help affected families.”

“In addition, our members’ efforts to show more understanding, compassion and love should increase respect and understanding among all people of goodwill,” Oaks continued, “we want to reduce the hate and contention so common today.

“We are optimistic that a majority of people — whatever their beliefs and orientations — long for better understanding and less contentious communications. That is surely our desire, and we seek the help of our members and others to attain it.”

These new policies are being sent to priesthood leaders worldwide and will be included in online updates to the

Church’s handbook for leaders.

“However, these changes do not represent a shift in Church doctrine related to marriage or the commandments of God in regard to chastity and morality. The doctrine of the plan of salvation and the importance of chastity will not change,” according to the website.

Moreover, the Church claims these policy changes “come after an extended period of counseling with the brethren in the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles and after fervent, united prayer to understand the will of the Lord on these matters.”

To end, the First Presidency remarked, “We pray these teachings will be received in the same spirit we received them from the Lord and have shared them with our leaders — as positive and inspiring instruction that will bless many lives. With gratitude we acknowledge God’s continuing guidance and love for all His children and invite our members to renew their commitment to follow the teachings of the Savior Jesus Christ to love God and to love one another.”

Today, Salt Lake City Mayor Jackie Biskupski commented on the announcement by saying, “Today’s announcement from the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints to reverse its policy regarding the children of LGBTQ parents is welcome and moving news.

“When this policy was announced, shortly after I was elected mayor, I said I hoped if my sons decided to join the church, they would not be forced to choose between the love of a church community and the love of their parents.

“During my first meeting with church officials, I delivered a letter in which I tried to capture the hurt and fear this policy inflicted upon our entire community.

I am grateful for this revelation and for church leaders acting upon it. This action is supportive of families and may even save lives.” Q

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Weber Co. jail officers show respect, inmates not so much, for trans woman housed with men From a traffic-violation arrest on March 2, 2019, a trans woman was incarcerated at the Weber County jail. The incident occurred while Ella Mae Vail and her girlfriend were passing through Utah on their way to Virginia.

According to reports, Vail was following behind behind a slow semi-truck and signaled to pass it. While she said the light blinked a few times, a Utah Highway Patrol trooper pulled her over for not signaling for the required two seconds.

In the probable cause statement, the state trooper who pulled Vail over also said he could smell marijuana from withing the vehicle, as well as found a pipe, marijuana and rolling papers in the car. Vail admitted however to smoking it hours earlier.

Vail was arrested and then booked into jail according to her anatomy and the information on her driver’s license, which identifies her as a man.

Reportedly and deservedly, Vail fearing for her safety asked the trooper if she’d be safe while held in jail. To which he

said, “Yeah, you’ll be safe.”

But it remained unclear whether Vail would be housed with male or female inmates.

Vail was placed with the male population, evidently because the jail hasn’t yet crafted a formal policy on transgender inmates, with the housing decision typically made based on the gender designation on the state-issued ID or their anatomy, specifically whether they’ve had sex reassignment surgery.

While Vail said most of the correctional officers showed her respect and used her preferred name and pronouns and seemed to care about her well-being, the male inmates continuously harassed her, to which she hurt herself to be sequestered in a mental health ward.

Data shows fears about Vail’s safety while incarcerated were based on the experiences of other transgender inmates.

Statistics from the Department of Justice from 2011-12 indicate that about 40 percent of transgender inmates in state or federal prison have reported some kind of sexual victimization. An estimated 27

Wyo. school riddled with homophobic, racist flyers At a junior high school in Cheyenne, Wyo., Wednesday, students found taped to the walls (or were handed) flyers promoting hate. The targets: LGBT and blacks.

The circulated flyers at McCormick Junior High School read: “It’s great to be straight it’s not OK to be gay,” “black lives only matter because if it weren’t for them who would pick our cotton,” and “Join the KKK,” with “the confederate kid club” in parentheses.

It’s the most recent event in a chain of bullying of McCormick’s Gay Straight Alliance students, according to a teacher at the school.

When Wyoming Equality caught wind of the news, the executive director Sara Burlingame, set up a meeting with the school’s principal, Jeff Conine — who

previously told the Wyoming Tribune Eagle there were only two flyers, and that they were taped to a wall in an area without security cameras. He said teachers found the flyers and took them down before the school day began.

However, three other reports claimed differently including one from Cheyenne Mayor Marian Orr, who had told Conine before the interview with the Wyoming Tribune Eagle that students (with Confederate flags) were handing out the flyers to students. Yet, at the meeting with Burlingame later in the day, Conine told her that he was not aware that students had passed out any flyers.

Principal Conine said the day’s events were still under investigation and couldn’t say what the repercussions would be for those responsible until they were found. The most severe punishment he is authorized as principal to deliver is a 10-day suspension.

Wyoming Equality released a statement: The past few days the news has report-

percent of transgender inmates in local jails reported sexual abuse.

At Vail’s bail hearing on March 11, the judge lowered the $2,200 bail amount to $200. And after posting bond, Vail and her girlfriend continued to Virginia on March 12. Whether Vail must return to Utah in April for a scheduled court appearance is pending, according to her attorney.

QSaltlake Magazine‘s request for an interview was refused. Q ed on white supremacist flyers targeting LGBTQ and Black youth at McCormick Junior High School — and the lack of school administrative response. We learned students have been reporting cases of harassment for the past few weeks. Then, the McCormick GSA co-sponsor, a substitute teacher, was fired for raising concerns.

But these kids are so resilient, y’all.

Yesterday, they gathered and held a rally at school with over 50 students holding “Love is Love” and “People are People” signs. We want to make sure our youth never feel isolated or unheard. That’s why Wyoming Equality is here: to remind all LGBTQ and Black youth that they are beautiful and that they are never alone.

We’re partnering with the NAACP Cheyenne chapter, Black faith leaders, elected officials including Mayor Marian Orr, and ACLU to host a community conversation today. We urge you to join us as we continue to raise awareness of these hateful incidents and protect the rights LGBTQ and Black young people everywhere. Q

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Marina Gomberg’s road to Equality (in) Utah

BY TONY HOBDAY

QSaltLake Magazine, for more than a decade, has followed Marina Gomberg’s unique and in many cases successful battles for LGBT rights and inclusion.

The news of Gomberg’s stepping-down from Equality Utah’s Board of Directors hits hard.

“After what has felt like both the shortest and longest six years of my life, I’m concluding my service as a member of Equality Utah’s board of directors, and the occasion has me feeling a sweet mix of nostalgia and pride,” Gomberg said.

In honor of Gomberg, here are a few highlights and remarks from Gomberg: In 2008, QSaltlake reported on an unprecedented National Coming Out Day Brunch, at which, as director of development and marketing at the Utah Pride Center, Gomberg paid tribute to two Utah educators who had worked hard to make the state’s schools safer and more inclusive places for gay and transgender students: Planned Parenthood’s Val Murdock and Barry Gomberg (Marina’s father), who helped to develop Weber State University’s Matthew Shepard Scholarship for LGBT and allied students.

“The lives and stories of LGBTQ people couldn’t be discussed openly by teachers in public schools and our transgender siblings lacked vital protections (ahem, and still do),” Gomberg reminisces.

Gomberg then spearheaded a 2009 program as the Utah Pride Center’s development director: The Services & Advocacy for Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender Elders, referred to as SAGE, to “serve people from cradle to grave.” Also that year, the Center hosted a two-day summit for people of color in the LGBT movement. “Our hope is to bridge gaps and create relationships that will hopefully help create change in our community,” Gomberg said at the time.

Moving forward a few years, Gomberg joined Equality Utah in 2013 as Board Secretary, a volatile period during which “we had been dealt powerful blows to legal equality (think California’s Prop 8 and

Utah’s Amendment 3) and I was ready to engage in the movement in a new way.” “[But] I had to get my bearings on Utah’s political landscape quickly because Equality Utah was running an anti-discrimination bill sponsored by my friend and now current EU board member, former state Sen. Steve Urquhart,” said Gomberg. “The bill would have protected LGBTQ people from discrimination in housing and employment. It made it out of committee (a hurdle we celebrated heartily) but ultimately died.”

“The Kitchen v. Herbert case challenging Utah’s Amendment 3, Utah’s 2004 voter approved measure that specifically excluded same-sex couples from the freedom to marry, was filed that same month, and Utah’s road to marriage equality began to get paved with rainbow bricks.

Just one year later, she temporarily stepped down from the Board and assumed the role of EU’s interim executive director. During that time, Gomberg had also “legally married her wife Elenor, and she joined three other couples and the ACLU of Utah in a lawsuit compelling the governor to recognize the nearly 1,300 same-sex marriages performed in Utah during the brief window it was

legal.”

“A year later in March 2015, the Utah Legislature overwhelming passed… the first anti-discrimination law to add protections for sexual orientation and gender identity in a red state. Watching Gov. Gary Herbert sign our protections into law was a moment I’ll never forget,” Gomberg remembers.

“Looking back, it seems like those pivotal moments foreshadowed a shift in political power that inspired such a momentous trajectory toward equality.

“I had serendipitously joined the board as Equality Utah was realizing its political strength (which is to say that while I take pride in what might be any small roles I played, the momentum created by my peers and the giants whose shoulders we all stood on are who to laud for what would follow).

“We’ve had more wins (even just killing anti-LGBTQ bills) and setbacks… but I have such overwhelming gratitude for witnessing life-changing and life-saving progress with a front-row seat.

“I thank Equality Utah for having me, and our state which I trust will courageously face our considerable journey toward justice that is yet to be traveled.” Q

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Utah adds ‘X’ to driver license gender markers While you can count on one hand the number of times it has happened, Utah has joined the ranks of states issuing gender-neutral markers on their driver licenses and state IDs, but for transgender, nonbinary, and intersex people, they’re still hard to get.

Since September of last year, Utah has been quietly issuing “X” markers on the identification cards, and it has been available on birth certificates since 2017. Only two licenses have been issued with the “X” marker since September, according to the public affairs director for the state Department of Public Safety, Marissa Cote.

The “X” marker is used for those who identify as neither male nor female.

The state issued its first nonbinary driver license to Mel Van De Graaff in September 2018, making Utah one of eight states, along with Washington, D.C., to offer a third option on driver licenses and state-issued ID cards. The other states include Arkansas, California, Colorado, Indiana, Maine, Minnesota, and Oregon. Vermont recently announced plans to roll out a third gender option sometime this summer.

Gender-neutral birth certificates are now permitted in New York City and several states, including California, New Jersey, Oregon, Washington, and Nevada (where Van De Graaff was issued theirs).

The National Center for Transgender Equality includes Idaho and Montana on this list, though NBC News has not yet independently confirmed it.

The milestone in Utah went largely unnoticed by the national media. Even the Movement Advancement Project, an LGBTQ think tank that tracks changes in policy and legislation for sexual and gender minorities across the U.S., does not include Utah among its list of states with nonbinary ID options.

That may be, in part, because the policy in the state remains murky, according to Van De Graaff.

“Because it’s up to the judge, a lot of nonbinary people just don’t try and get their markers changed,” De Graaff said. “A lot of them don’t have the monetary means to do so. I really believe the only reason I got mine granted was because I got an attorney,

and attorneys are not cheap.”

The Utah Division of Motor Vehicles determines the gender marker listed on an applicant’s identification either by their birth certificate or a valid U.S. passport.

As Cote explained, the Utah DMV’s policy “has always been to base the gender notation off of an acceptable primary identification document which includes a gender notation.”

Utah has granted just two nonbinary birth certificates since 2017, said Terry Lucherini, acting bureau director of the Utah Vital Records and Statistics. He also said these documents are granted by “court order only.”

“That’s the only way we change the gender on a birth certificate,” Lucherini told NBC News.

To date, the U.S. has never issued a nonbinary passport. Because of that, trans and nonbinary people need to rely on birth certificates to update their IDs in Utah; but even getting those updated can be exceedingly difficult, advocates say.

When Van de Graaff started pursuing a new gender marker in November 2017, they claimed no one they knew had “heard of anybody in Utah having a

First organ transplant of a living HIV-positive donor At Johns Hopkins Hospital in Baltimore, surgeons successfully transplanted a kidney from a living HIV-positive donor to an HIV-positive recipient, “a medical breakthrough they hope will expand the pool of available organs and help change perceptions of HIV,” reported The Washington Post. And the doctors say the recipient no longer needs kidney dialysis for the first time in a year.

The donor, Nina Martinez, who acquired HIV from a blood transfusion as an infant, said prior to the operation, “Society perceives me and people like me as people who bring death and I can’t figure out any better way to show that people like me can bring life.”

Surgeons have transplanted 116 organs from deceased HIV-positive donors to recipients with HIV since 2016, when a

gender “X” license on documentation of any kind.” Van de Graaff continued that the common thinking was, “This can’t be done, because it hasn’t been done.”

Because Utah lacks a clear statewide policy on changing one’s name and gender on vital records, like birth certificates, whether an individual successfully obtains a court order is largely up to the determination of local judges — who often widely vary in their decisions. This applies not only to those looking for a gender-neutral “X” marker, but also to those looking to update their documents from “F” to “M” or vice versa.

Two years ago, Judge Bruce C. Lubeck of Utah’s 3rd Judicial District Court reportedly told 17-year-old transgender male Lex Rigby that Lubeck could not “in good conscience” allow the gender marker on Rigby’s birth certificate to be updated from “F” to “M”.

Lubeck told Rigby, “I seriously hope this won’t offend you.” Q new law allowing that surgery took effect.

However, one question which remains is whether receiving an organ from someone with a different strain of HIV than their own poses any risks, but so far there have been no safety problems, according to the United Network for Organ Sharing which oversees the transplant system.

“Here’s a disease that in the past was a death sentence and now has been so well controlled that it offers people with that disease an opportunity to save somebody else,” said Dr. Dorry Segev, a Hopkins surgeon who pushed for the HIV Organ Policy Equity, or HOPE, the act that lifted a 25-year U.S. ban on transplants between people with HIV. For years, doctors had hesitated to allow people still living with HIV to donate because of concern that their remaining kidney would be at risk of damage from the virus or older medications used to treat it. Q

14 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | QMMUNITY

Utah Leather Pride May 19 The second annual Utah Leather Pride will be held May 19 once again at the Sun Trapp and Metro Music Hall at Sixth West and First South.

“I believe this segment of LGBTQ population is misunderstood and misrepresented, though a lot of our traditions have intersected with the gay community,” said organizer Michael Sanders. “Our community does have its problems but the openness of our sexuality is kind of a

Nick Cendese and Leftenant Fox

Qmmunity SL County Health asking about PrEP services The Salt Lake County Health Dept. is asking people their interest about them offering PrEP services. A survey is available at bit.ly/slprepsurvey.

Utah Pride Center Cosplay Brunch and costume contest The Utah Pride Center and the FanX Salt Lake Comic Convention are pleased to announce the 2nd LGBTQ Cosplay Brunch, Friday, April 19, 9-11 a.m. Enjoy a morning of cosplay, meet new friends, and get energized for the first day of FanX Spring Convention at the Salt Lake Convention Center.

If you have not purchased your tickets to FanX yet, your participation and attendance

Qsaltlake.com |

big deal here in Utah.”

The first indoor/outdoor festival celebrates the diverse LGBTQ and pansexual leather/kink/BDSM community in Utah, say organizaers. The one-day celebration features leather/kink/BDSM and LGBTQ groups, local/ national vendors, full bar, entertainment, a sandbox, Bootblacks, giveaways/prizes, and more.

Following the festival, the annual Mr. and Ms. SL♥UT competitions commence at 8:30 p.m.

“The mission of the Mr. and Ms. Leather SL♥UT contests is to promote leather culture among the Salt Lake City community. We are looking for leather men and women that will act as ambassadors to work with various segments of both LGBTQ community and multiple layers of the radical sex communities,” said Sanders. “Titleholders are passionate about activism, charity, and community building. They can articulately express their platform and excite those around them to get involved.”

To enter the competitions, apply at mrleatherslut.com or msleatherslut.com The current Mr. Leather SL♥UT, installed last year, is Nick Cendese and Ms. Leather SL♥UT is Leftenant Fox. Each were involved in many events over the past year and will hand over the “crown” at this year’s festival.

The mission of Utah Leather Pride is at the brunch will get you a free ticket (for the first 50 people to arrive).

Also, there will be prizes for the best dressed at the brunch! Cosplay contest judging will happen at 10:15 a.m.

WHERE: Salt Palace Convention Center, 100 West Temple, Salt Lake City WHEN: FRIDAY, APRIL 19, 2019 8 AM – Salt Palace opens, Registration begins 10 AM – Vendor Floor opens to VIP & Gold, Panels begin (including General Admission) 11 AM – Vendor Floor opens to General 8 PM – Vendor Floor closes, Last Panels start SATURDAY, APRIL 20, 2019 8 AM – Salt Palace opens and Registration begins 9:30 AM – Vendor Floor opens to VIP & Gold 10 AM – Vendor Floor opens to General, Panels begin 7 PM – Vendor Floor closes 8 PM – Last Panels start This year’s celeb list includes: Zachary Levi and Asher Angel (Shazam); Clark Gregg, Pom

Issue 298 | APRIL 18, 2019

“to honor and celebrate our culture and history. To promote activism within the LGBTQ and pansexual leather/kink/ BDSM community and unity through cooperative endeavors that offer entertainment, education, charity, social interaction, and community service.”

Utah Leather Pride Festival Sun., May 19, noon–8 p.m., free admission Sun Trapp, 100 S. 600 West Title competitions follow at approximately 8:30 p.m.at the Metro Music Hall.

Klementieff, Mike Colter, Tye Sheridan (Marvel); Tom Felton, Warwick Davis, John Cleese (Harry Potter franchise); Tom Ellis and Aimee Garcia (Lucifer); Mark Pellegrino and Samantha Smith (Supernatural); Tyler Hoechlin and Adelaide Kane (Teen Wolf); Billie Piper (Doctor Who); and Lynda Carter (Wonder Woman TV series).

For additional information and to purchase tickets, visit fanxsaltlake.com.

Queer Youth Prom At the conclusion of the convention Saturday, April 20, the 14th Annual UPC Queer Prom, “blasts off” at the Salt Palace (Room 355), 8-11 p.m., for a fabulous evening of glamour, dancing, fun, and community youth ages 1420. The theme this year is BLAST OFF! – Explore the Gaylaxy. And a photo ID is required for entrance. Additionally, another nearby room will be slated as a “Queer Prom Parents & Caregivers Lounge”.

Tickets are $5 in advance at utahpridecenter.org or $10 at the door.

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A Sneak Peek at Utah Pride This year’s Utah Pride Days will begin May 17 with the Utah Pride Spectacular.

Once the Wednesday or Thursday of Pride, it will be held two weeks before the big festival weekend and parade.

The Utah Pride Festival is a community event which features a broad spectrum of activities and entertainment. The 44th Utah Pride Festival will be held June 1–2 at Washington Square in downtown Salt Lake City. Pride 2019 is excited to offer additional celebratory events, diverse food and booth vendors, venue upgrades and excellent entertainment options.

The overall theme this year is “Exist.

Resist. Persist. Celebrating 50 years of Stonewall.” The beginnings of Pride worldwide are generally attributed to an uprising at the Stonewall Inn in New York City’s Greenwich Village in June, 1969.

From its humble beginnings in 1974 as an informal gathering in the park, the Utah Pride Festival has come a long way.

It is now a major Salt Lake City event that grows bolder and brighter every year. The Festival empowers the LGBTQ+ community of Salt Lake, as well as the state of Utah as a whole, to come together and celebrate. The Festival is now attended by more than 50,000 people and continues to grow each year. In 2018, the Pride Parade attracted 50,000 spectators.

A broad spectrum of people can be found at all these events, including members of the LGBTQ+ community, their family members and allies.

Booths and Parade Applications are now being taken on the Utah Pride Center website for booth rentals and parade entries.

Standard registration for exhibitors ends April 20, with late registration extending through May 10 depending on availability. Rates vary depending on profit/nonprofit status and the size of the organization. Small grassroots organizations and arts and crafts organizations can participate in a tent with other similar groups. An interactive zone will be set up and a new kink zone is still in

the works.

Parade applications are being taken through April 1. Because of the continued growth of the parade, new this year is a series of questions on the application which will help a selection committee determine which groups will be allowed to participate. Parade organizers typically receive over 200 applications to participate, but only 150 can be accommodated.

Consideration of the size and number of participants of the parade entry, its focus on the LGBTQ+ community, and the “intersectionality of oppressions” of the applying group.

Schedule PRIDE SPECTACULAR kicks of Utah Pride Days on Friday May 17, from 6 to 9.30 p.m. at the Union Events Center 235 N. 500 West.

The REAL SALT LAKE PRIDE NIGHT will be held at their stadium, 9256 State St, Sandy. Details are still forthcoming.

The PRIDE INTERFAITH SERVICE will be Thursday May 30 from 7 to 8 p.m. at Christ United Methodist Church, 2375 E. 3300 South. The guest speaker will be Bishop Karen Oliveto, he first openly lesbian bishop of the United Methodist Church and the Bishop of Utah, Colorado, Montana, and Wyoming United Methodist Churches.

The YOUTH PRIDE DANCE will be from 8 to 11 p.m. on Friday May 31 on the Festival Grounds. Entrance at 500 S. State Street.

OUTDOORS and PROUD 5K will be the morning of Saturday June 1 from 8 to 11 a.m. at Jordan Park & Peace Gardens, 1060 S. 900 West The annual PRIDE MARCH AND

RALLY will be Saturday June 1 from 1 to 3 p.m. at the Utah State Capitol south stairs, 350 N. State Street.

The FESTIVAL itself will be Saturday June from 1 to 11 p.m. and Sunday June 2 from 11 a.m. to 7 p.m. at Washington Square, the park around the Salt Lake City and County Building.

The UTAH PRIDE PARADE will again take place Sunday June 2 beginning at 10 a.m. at West Temple, running along Second South to Fourth East.

Other events are in the planning stages as well and will be in the next issue of QSaltLake Magazine, along with some of the entertainment highlights. Q More information at utahpridecenter.org

16 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | SNEAK PEEK AT UTAH PRIDE

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Issue 298 | APRIL 18, 2019

A Sneak Peek at Utah Pride Headliner —

BY MICHAEL AARON

AJA

Utah Pride

announced that one of the headline acts at this year’s festival will be queer musical artist Aja. If you’ve heard of Aja, it’s probably because they were on season 9 of Ru Paul’s Drag Race and last year’s All Stars 3, but you might not know that Aja is also a singer/songwriter who has dropped nearly two dozen songs, 15 of which on a new album released in February.

Aja is the stage personality of 25-yearold Jay Rivera, who was adopted and raised by a single Puerto Rican mother in Brooklyn. They claim to be of Moroccan, Egyptian and Libyan descent.

DRAG At the age of 16, Aja was drawn to drag almost as a lark.

“Honestly, I was watching the

second season of Drag Race with my cousin and she was like, ‘you could do this.’ I looked over at her like she was crazy,” Aja told AM New York. Aja said they threw on a cousin’s wig and heels, and entered in Manhattan drag competitions at venues like Posh Bar, Stonewall Inn, Metropolitan bar and the now-shuttered Sugarland, a place where “weirdos and club kids” reigned supreme.

Aja said that drag was therapeutic and changed their life.

“I used to suffer from really terrible PTSD and when I started doing drag, I stopped having panic attacks very quickly. They went from being very significant to very minor and then they just stopped,” they said.

Moving out to be on their own at 18, Aja lived as a trans woman for a year and then took the term genderqueer. After coming in 9th place on Ru Paul’s Drag Race, Aja began to eschew the term “drag queen.”

“My decision to release the phrase ‘drag queen’ has less to do with opinions in the mainstream media and more to do with my personal decision as a queer person,” Aja told them.

“When I started making music, I had a lot of gender identity issues through my writing, and I thought it would be more comfortable for me to say I’m a queer artist who puts on hair and makeup, and if people want to look at it as drag, they can. I don’t consider myself to be a drag queen for the sake of not confusing my own identity.”

Aja said that a number of Ru Paul alums should embrace the term queer artist more readily than drag queen.

“There are other performers in the community who do other art forms, who I would consider more

PHOTOS: TANNER ABEL

a ‘queer artist’ than just a ‘drag queen.’ For example, Violet Chachki: she knows her burlesque and her perception of gender is so blurred that I can’t really just say ‘drag queen,’ so I feel more comfortable saying queer artist.

“Or someone like Sasha Velour, who curates these big shows and spaces for queer people — I would never want to reduce titling her as just a drag queen.

Even someone like Bianca Del Rio, who’s traveling the world doing comedy, she’s doing more than just being a drag queen.

These are people who are taking their talents and showing them through drag in the media.”

MUSICIAN Aja began posting music online as a teenager as a way to get their point of view out there and continued to make music as a way to be heard. In February, Aja released their most ambitious music collection, Box Office.

Aja says the track placement of Box Office is in sequential order of the events in their life, highlighted in the music, and plays out as small stories, all connected to make one larger narrative piece. In the music, one should get a sense of the real Aja. “In the album, I’m really just being myself and putting forward who I’ve always been. I feel like I’m not scared to, and I really hope people listen to it and realize they can just be themselves,” Aja told Canada’s IN Magazine. “I feel as a queer person in hip-hop, or music period, there’s sort of pigeonholing where people want you to be a certain way, look a certain way, act a certain way, and I’m just not. I don’t fit that mold, and it’s a mold I’ll never fit.

I’ll never be like, the sassy-person-of-colorqueer-artist, I’ll never be that. I can only be me. So I really feel like it was more important for me to just be myself.”

Some may believe that it would be hard or scary for an artist that reveals so much of themselves through their music.

“Honestly, it wasn’t that hard to be open. I think the real battle to overcome when you’re just trying to be yourself and transparent is understanding and knowing that people are going to judge you positively and negatively. It will be personal but at the same time it doesn’t matter because when you’re being yourself, you know, it’s just the most important part of living. Just being you and being an

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open book. For me, I’ve never had qualms about being an open book so it was really easy to put it down into music.”

RAP Aja’s music is categorized in the rap genre, something they say they were drawn to through artists like Nicki Minaj, Lil’ Kim, Missy Elliott, Trina, Jay-Z, and Eminem.

“I really had a thing for musical artists who were very clever with their wordplay. I love clever wordplay so much, I love metaphors and I think that there’s something so intelligent about people who can convey a message without having to be so literal,” Aja told IN. Breaking into the rap industry and finding other artists to collaborate with as a queer artist has been challenging.

“Getting the collaboration wasn’t too easy because I think being a queer rapper, a lot of people didn’t take my project seriously,” they told IN. “We hit up a lot of people, honestly, and I’m being completely transparent; everyone who is on the album is everyone who responded back.

And that was crazy to me, the people who I worked with on the album were so easy, so genuine, and so nice. And I feel like it was a blessing because… it doesn’t just happen that you get to work with people, especially people who are in the hip hop community that are easy and nice to work with.

“For me, finding collaborations was like, every time I went to seek out a feature that person needed to fit perfectly on the song. They needed to match the vibe, they needed to match my lyrics. A lot of people won’t actually know this, but when I first wrote ‘Clowns,’ it was a completely different song. When I decided to put Rico Nasty on it, I rewrote the entire song, so that it would match Rico Nasty more because I thought that the chemistry needed to be there in order for the song to really sell. I’m so happy I did because I honestly love the way the song came out.

“It’s the same thing for ‘Safari Zone.’

At first, ‘Safari Zone’ was a completely different song, a completely different beat. It was actually supposed to be a song called ‘Slumber Party,’ and then when CupcakKe agreed to the feature I was like, ‘Okay, well I don’t really wanna put CupcakKe on a song called ‘Slumber

Party’ because no one’s really sleeping on her, she’s a badass bitch! People love CupcakKe. I said, ‘Okay, what’s the song for CupcakKe?’… you know honestly, in my opinion, it’s like shaking your lil ass, having fun, and when I got that beat, it was the one.”

IMAGE Aja said that their image, though known for high concept videos and killer looks, was difficult to narrow down.

“I’ve struggled with image for a long time, and one of the things that I really think about when I’m visual directing, or putting a package together is just… something that I love the most,” they said. “Sometimes fashion just means that you know your style and you’re killing it. For me, I just go for things I like.

“I like a little bit of shiny, a little bit of athletic, and honestly a lot of hood. My style is just kinda like, I’m hood but I’m rich, that’s my style. A little bit of like, Japanese street fashion that I’ve always been into. I’ve been obsessed with this sort of Harajuku lick. It’s not necessarily full on Harajuku but it’s a lick of it, whether it’s in the color palette because I love pastels and I love vibrant colors, or with just the hairstyles. I’ve always had a thing for that style.”

Aja was featured in H&M’s first pride campaign, along with Kim Petras and Gus Kenworthy.

“I think that one of the reasons I was chosen for the campaign was that everyone knows I’m a very outspoken person.

I have a lot to say, and these sort of campaigns, especially when they’re picking artists for the campaign, it’s really about people who want to inspire other people and who are just unapologetically themselves,” Aja told IN. “It really was a compliment for them to request me. To be in it was an accomplishment, and I hope I get to do more endorsements, hopefully sometime soon… and not even relating to Pride because it’s more than just June and July. A lot of us have so much more to say. But I am very grateful for H&M and that campaign.

It was very surreal, getting to walk into stores all around the world. I was touring when the campaign was active and I got to see myself on huge billboards. I got to

see myself in Times Square. I got to see myself in almost every single store that I went to, it was surreal.

TOUR Aja embarked March 16 on a tour of 14 cities, beginning in New Zealand, then Australia, China, and the U.S. They will be heading back from Birmingham, U.K. to join us in Salt Lake at Utah Pride the first weekend of June, then will head to Edmonton, Canada. Q Find the full schedule and all performers at Utah Pride at UtahPrideCenter.org

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Issue 298 | APRIL 18, 2019

A Sneak Peek at Utah Pride

Headliner —

BY TONY HOBDAY

LAFEMMEBEAR

In another

recent Utah Pride announcement, another headlining act for this year’s festival is ­LeahAnn Mitchell, who performs under the moniker Lafemmebear, a 31-year-old afro-Latinx and queer, transgender person of color artist and New Jersey native, who moved to California to pursue her innate love of music.

She has worked in various capacities with many major label talents including Sony, Sony Red, and Massenburg Entertainment. She has engineered for Grammy Award winner Le’Andria Johnson, as well as Eric Dawkins of the Grammy Award-winning production team, The Underdogs.

And she produced and wrote with Grammy Award-winning songwriters The Jackie Boyz.

However, when Mitchell came out as a queer, transgenPHOTO: MARY MA PHOTOGRAPHY

der woman in 2013, she said she was blacklisted from the music industry.

And yet, she has persevered — now making music on her own terms. Not only is she a rapper-singer-vocalist; Mitchell also mixes masters, produces and engineers all of her music. After dusting off her music-making chops with a self-titled EP in early 2018, she is dropping a lush, eclectic song collection entitled #FEMMEBEARCLXTV featuring Bay Area artists Najee Amaranth, Yona T., and Robert Ross, among others. #FEMMEBEARCLXTV is a genre-blending experiment in soulful and rhythmic afro-beats mixed with hip hop and jazz.

“I have been writing songs professionally for labels since I was 13 years old,” Mitchell told Billboard in an interview last month. “I begged my

G-Ma to take me to the Guitar Center so I could spend entire days there learning every piece of equipment I could get near in the pro-audio section.

I needed to get the sounds out of my head. The voice, my voice… . Late nights singing at the top of my lungs in the dark; playing the piano … pretending I was onstage with Brandy, Jill Scott and Meshell N’degeocello. Meshell’s black queerness was so amazing to me at a young age and the musicianship made me feel like learning every instrument I could.”

When asked in the interview what she would like the “titans of the music industry to know about QTPOC artists, she responded, “We make incredibly complex, diverse, professional, raw, amazingly polished art. You should really see about us; but real talk — we coming either way.”

In addition to re-launching her musical creation, production, and engineering career, Lafemmebear is currently starring as the lead role in ​ The Red Shades​, a ​transgender superhero rock opera​that has played sold-out showcases at several venues in San Francisco and Oakland.

The Red Shades rock concert collides with musical theatre in the exhilarating tale of a gang of trans superheroes defending their community in 1960s San Francisco.

In it, Ida, a teenage trans girl, runs away from home to escape the trauma of smalltown life. She joins a gang of trans superheroes squatting in the Tenderloin and unlocks her own super powers. Together, they use magic to defend their community against the police and other enemies of their liberation.

The musical styles range from punk to cabaret to rockabilly to epic pop ballads.

The songs transition seamlessly from one to the next, each serving as a building block of the story.

This is the rock opera that the world needs now, as the trans community is in the cross hairs of a dangerously regressive regime. Trans people, particularly trans women of color, are being murdered at unprecedented rates. Nevertheless, the trans community is resilient. The Red Shades hopes to bring to light the incredible activism of a prior era in order to draw parallels with the present and bring a message of hope. Q For information on how to see LaFemmeBear at the Utah Pride Festival, go to utahpridecenter.org

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20 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | SNEAK PEEK AT PRIDE

Prides across the state A newly formed coalition of Pride organizations in Utah met last weekend and the Utah Pride Center and announced the dates for this year’s festivals. Save the dates!

May 19: UTAH LEATHER PRIDE — Salt Lake City May 31–June 2: UTAH PRIDE — Salt Lake City Aug. 3: OGDEN PRIDE – Ogden, Utah Sept. 14: LOGAN PRIDE — Logan, Utah Sept. 14: PROVO PRIDE — Provo, Utah Sept. 16–22: PRIDE OF SOUTHERN UTAH — St. George, Utah Sept. 28: MOAB PRIDE, Moab, Utah

Prides around the globe APRIL Apr. 6–7: Phoenix Pride Parade Phoenix, Ariz.

Apr. 25–28: Jasper Pride Jasper, Alberta, Canada Apr. 25–28: Philadelphia Black Pride Philadelphia, Pa. Apr. 28–29: Tokyo Rainbow Pride Tokyo, Japan

MAY May 2–12: Maspalomas Gay Pride, Gran Canaria May 4: Raleigh Pride Raleigh, N.C. May 18: Belgian Pride Brussels May 18: Springfield Pride, Ill. May 18: New Hope / Lambertville Pride Parade, Pa. May 18–19: Long Beach Lesbian & Gay Pride, Calif.

May 24–28: DC Black Pride Washington, DC May 25–26: Birmingham Pride, UK

May 25–June 2 Torremolinos Gay Pride, Torremolinos, Spain May 27–June 3: El Paso Pride Texas, El Paso, Texas May 31: Guelph Pride 2018, Ontario, Canada May 31–June 2: Tusla Pride, Okla.

May 31–June 2: Provincetown Pride, Provincetown, Mass.

May 31–June 3 Laguna Beach Pride 365, Calif.

May 31–June 9: Boston Pride —Boston, Mass.

May 31–June 9: Capital Pride, Washington DC May 31–June 9: Central Alabama Pride — Birmingham, Ala. May 31–June 2: Sonoma County Pride, Calif.

JUNE June 1: Magical Pride at Disneyland Paris, Paris, France June 1: Sun City Pride, El Paso

Qsaltlake.com |

June 1: Guadalajara Pride, Mexico June 1: Pride in the CLE, Cleveland, Ohio June 1–2: Dallas Pride, Texas June 1–3: Venice Pride, Calif.

June 2: Pride Puerto Rico, San Juan, Puerto Rico June 1–8 Pride Niagra, St. Catharines, Ontario June 1-9: LA Pride, Calif.

June 1–10: Pride Sitges, Spain June 14–15: Zurich Pride Festival, Zurich, Switzerland June 15: Pride Edinburgh, UK June 1–30: NYC Pride, New York June 7–9: Albuquerque Pride, N.M. June 7–9: New Orleans Pride, La. June 8: Gay Pride Rome, Italy June 9: Athens Pride, Greece June 9–15: Varese Pride, Italy June 12–15 Ibiza Gay Pride, Spain June 13–16: Shanghai Pride, Shanghai, China June 14: Tel Aviv Pride, Israel June 14–16: Baltimore Pride, Md. June 14–16: Stonewall Columbus Pride, Ohio June 14–23: Oslo Pride, Norway June 15: Rhode Island Pride, R.I. June 15–16: Denver Pridefest, Colo.

June 20–29: Dublin LGBTQ Pride, Ireland June 21–23: Kenora Pride, Canada June 22: Cincinnati Pride, Ohio June 22: Pride Houston, Texas June 22–23: Chicago Pride Fest

June 22–23: Nashville Pride, Tenn.

June 22–23: Twin Cities Pride, Minneapolis, Minn.

June 22-29: Anchorage Pridefest, Alaska June 23: Sao Paulo Pride, Brazil June 25-30: Helsinki Gay Pride, Finland June 27–30: Mexico City Gay Pride 2019, Mexico June 27–July 7: Madrid Orgullo, Madrid, Spain June 28–29: Heartland Pride, Omaha, Neb. June 28–30: Big Paris Pride 2019, June 29: Pride San Antonio, Texas June 29-30: Pride St. Louis, Mo. June 29-30: San Francisco Pride June 30: Alegria World Pride New York 2019, New York,

JULY July 1-14: Bristol Pride, UK July 5-7: Cologne Pride, Germany July 6: Pride in Londo, UK July 12-14: San Diego Pride, Calif.

July 20–21: Lesbisch Schwules Stadtfest Berlin, Germany July 22–28: Happy Valley Pride, Hebden Bridge UK July 26-August 4: Belfast Gay Pride, Belfast, UK July 27: CSD — Berlin, Germany July 27–Aug 1: Pride Amsterdam

AUGUST Aug. 2–4: Brighton and Hove Pride, UK Aug. 4: Leeds Pride — Leeds, UK Aug. 4: Vancouver Gay Pride, Canada

Issue 298 | APRIL 18, 2019

Aug. 5-11: Prague Pride, Czech Rep Aug. 8-17: Reykjavík Pride, Iceland Aug. 8-18: Montreal Pride, Canada Aug. 10: Eugene Pride, Ore. Aug. 10: Pride in Surrey, Woking, UK Aug. 13-18: Copenhagen Pride — Copenhagen Denmark Aug. 17-18: Charlotte Pride — Charlotte, N.C. Aug. 23–26: Manchester Pride Festival — Manchester, UK Aug. 23–September 2: Pride Calgary — Calgary, Canada Aug. 24: Cornwall Gay Pride — Cornwall, UK Aug. 24-25: Silicon Valley Pride — San Jose, Calif.

SEPTEMBER Sept. 2–8 Benidorm Pride — Benidorm, Spain Sept. 6–15: Malta Pride — Valletta, Malta Sept. 8: Oakland Pride — Oakland, Calif.

Sept. 14: Logan Pride — Logan, Utah Sept. 14: Provo Pride — Provo, Utah Sept. 16–22: Pride of Southern Utah — St. George, Utah Sept. 28: Midsouth Pride Memphis — Memphis, Tenn.

Sept. 28: Moab Pride — Moab, Utah

OCTOBER Oct. 1–15: Hispanic LGBT Pride — Miami Oct. 11–13: Atlanta Pride — Ga. Oct. 24–26: Savannah Pride — Ga.

NOVEMBER Nov. 1–3: Palm Springs Pride — Calif.

See the full list at QSaltLake.com

APRIL 18, 2019 |

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SNEAK PEEK AT PRIDE | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 21

Save the date to help us celebrate ISSUES 15 Years

as we bring our annual Utah Pride Guide issue and 2019-20 QPages Directory Friday, May 24 at the Utah Pride Center.

Watch our Facebook page, Twitter, Instagram and qsaltlake.com.

Advertise to Utah’s LGBTQ community at 801-997-9763 or sales@qsaltlake.com

22 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | VIEWS

views

Qsaltlake.com |

Issue 298 | APRIL 18, 2019

quotes “No occupation is so delightful to me as the culture of the earth, and no culture comparable to that of the garden.”

— Thomas Jefferson

“What is a weed? A weed is a plant whose virtues have not yet been discovered.”

— Ralph Waldo Emerson

“Gardening is how I relax. It’s another form of creating and playing with colors.”

— Oscar de la Renta

“Love is like a beautiful flower which I may not touch, but whose fragrance makes the garden a place of delight just the same.”

— Helen Keller

“Keep love in your heart.

A life without it is like a sunless garden when the flowers are dead.”

— Oscar Wilde

“On Saturday afternoons when all the things are done in the house and there’s no real work to be done, I play Bach and Chopin and turn it up real loudly and get a good bottle of chardonnay and sit out on my deck and look out at the garden.”

— Maya Angelou

“If I’m in the country, my big idea is to do nothing.

It means talking, it means cooking with the leftovers in the fridge — l’art d’accommoder les restes — it means gardening.”

— Christian Louboutin

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who’s your daddy

Hooray! I’m NOT an Apostate!

BY CHRISTOPHER KATIS

In December

of 2015, I wrote a column titled, “Hooray! I’m an Apostate!” which discussed the then newly-announced Mormon Church policy classifying married same-gender couples as apostates and forbidding children raised by these couples from being fullfledged members of the church. Those kids could, of course, change their status when they became adults and disavowed their parents’ marriage.

I received a surprising amount of flack for that column, but not from straight LDS readers. No, people who were offended by the Mormon leadership’s decision felt I wasn’t tough enough, hadn’t been properly outraged by this egregious policy.

Instead I had advocated that what the Mormon Church does is its business. The protests by Equality Utah, the requests for dialogue from then newly-elected Mayor Biskupski gave, in my opinion, far too much weight to a policy that affected a very small number of LGTBQ people.

Now the Mormon Church has done a complete about face. No, they’re not accepting same-gender marriage, but gay couples are no longer apostates. Kids

raised by LGBTQ parents can now be blessed and baptized and partake in every other aspect of the religion. I guess God changed his mind about the subject. And I think that’s great. It still doesn’t impact me nor the overwhelming majority of gay people — even in Utah — but I’m happy for the people who view this as good for them and their families.

What I find most interesting about the change in policy is what seems to be its genesis. It wasn’t the actions of advocacy groups or politicians. It wasn’t the thousands of not-so-active church members formally demanding their names be removed from the Mormons’ records. It wasn’t even the crisis public relations firestorm it ignited. It was rank-and-file Mormons telling their church leaders, “This just isn’t right.”

It would seem that — just like the faithful of other religions — when run-ofthe-mill Mormons have openly gay family members, when they count among their friends gay couples with kids, they have a hard time seeing the justification for a policy that they see as hurtful. And that’s why I stand by my previous column.

Am I glad for the change of heart the

Mormon leadership has shown? Absolutely. I know a lot of openly gay parents for whom this is amazingly welcome news.

I also think it’s a great step in helping to establish a still tenuous relationship with the LGBTQ community. But what the Mormon Church decides for its faithful is of no concern to me. Just as the decisions of Methodists, Catholics, Muslims, Jews, Buddhists, Hindus or any other religion of which I am not an adherent have no impact on me.

When we as a community publicly question any religion’s policies, we give greater credence and importance to them than is deserved. These policies don’t affect the LGBTQ community, they affect the LGBTQ members of that particular religion. If you don’t like a faith’s belief system, you don’t have to follow it.

I don’t want any religion — including my own — to have a voice in public discourse about LGBTQ rights. (It’s one of my major issues with the Mormon faith.)

So, I certainly don’t want to make religious policy a public matter undeservedly important to the LGBTQ community as a whole. I refuse to give any religion that power.

As far as this new policy toward gay couples and their kids, well, I guess Hooray! I’m not an apostate! But who cares? What they think is of no concern to me. Q If you’d like to read the original “Hooray! I’m an Apostate!” column, you can find it at qsaltlake.com/?p=53750

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creep of the week

Qsaltlake.com |

Issue 298 | APRIL 18, 2019

Linda Harvey

The Gay,

BY D’ANNE WITKOWSKI

Lesbian and Straight Education Network’s annual Day of Silence is Friday, April 12, and you know what that means. Silence.

Well, sort of. The anti-LGBTQ right is always very vocal this time of year.

According to GLSEN, the Day of Silence “is a student-led national event where folks take a vow of silence to highlight the silencing and erasure of LGBTQ people at school.”

It sounds, well, pretty tame to say the least (no pun intended!).

But to hear Linda Harvey tell it, the Day of Silence is a “weapon” in a “war on children.”

This war, Harvey writes on the Barb Wire website, “includes pronouns as a battlefield, schools secretly colluding with deeply disturbed children behind parents’ backs and even teachers encouraging students to join private ‘gay’ clubs on Instagram without parental knowledge.”

What? Teenagers on Instagram without parental knowledge? Can you even imagine?

The Day of Silence, which GLSEN has been sponsoring since 2001, is a textbook example of peaceful protest. What are people protesting, you ask?

According to GLSEN, “Nearly four in five LGBTQ students don’t see positive LGBTQ representation in their curriculum, nearly eight in 10 experience verbal harassment and almost a third miss school for feeling unsafe or uncomfortable. The Day of Silence is a national movement to highlight the silencing and erasure of LGBTQ students in school, which demands that school leaders take action to be more inclusive.”

Alas, “inclusive” is a dirty word to Harvey. In fact, she doesn’t believe LGBTQ kids are being bullied.

“Here’s how the bullying story goes,” she writes. “We are told that people

who claim a homosexual or opposite-sex identity — which no one needs to do, so always keep that in mind — that these folks are relentlessly bullied, are perennial victims and are being ‘silenced’ everywhere. Are you laughing yet? Where and when have homosexuals and their allies been ‘silent’ lately? If only!”

LOL! Those big-mouth homos! Those loud lesbians! Those garish gays! Those booming bisexuals. Those thesaurus-using trans folks. OMG aren’t you laughing SO HARD right now about them supposedly being bullied? No? Well, Linda is. She’s not very nice.

I’m struck by her aside that “no one needs to [claim a homosexual or opposite-sex identity], so always keep that in mind.” First of all, I’m not sure what an “opposite-sex identity” is, but Harvey doesn’t know either, so at least we’re even. But I’m struck by her claim that her readers should “always keep that in mind.” It sure sounds like what she’s saying is that no one needs to come out as LGBTQ, and if people choose to come out, well, sucks for them and any bullying they experience they brought on themselves.

She admits that some bullying happens “and that’s never acceptable.” But then she says that LGBTQ oppression is a “phony narrative” and that it’s “quite a stretch” to accuse people of being bullies just because they don’t see LGBTQ bullying as a big problem but they do see the existence of LGBTQ people as a big problem.

“Any person can object to high-risk ‘LGBTQ’ behavior but also, never bully anyone,” Harvey writes (comma placement is all hers). “And of course, faithful Christians believe the Word of God, and so we know this behavior is wrong. So the Day of Silence is an event that, by definition, discriminates against Christians.”

Ah, yes. The old “not being allowed to

insist that LGBTQ people are gross and damaged violates my religious beliefs” argument.

Harvey then asks, “Who are the real bullies here?”

You are, Linda. It’s still you. Why are you so bad at this?

Thankfully Harvey knows how to protect innocent would-be bullies from being unwillingly exposed to the idea that LGBTQ people are human beings worthy and deserving of respect and kindness.

“We are suggesting that parents keep kids home that day and away from the false messages that don’t help anything,” she writes. “Our children will not benefit from lies combined with a flagrant misuse of instructional time.”

OK, so if I’m understanding this correctly, the most hardcore anti-LGBTQ students will be skipping school on Friday, April 12, so that they don’t miss any instructional time. Got it.

It’s interesting that Harvey thinks that the Day of Silence doesn’t “help anything,” and yet she’s urging parents to keep their kids away from school that day lest they be tempted into humanizing or feeling any compassion toward LGBTQ people. Yep, sounds like the Day of Silence is totally ineffective at reaching people, then.

The Day of Silence is,” according to Harvey, “a huge con job” intended to normalize “sexual deviance.”

Oh, Linda. Shut up. Shut up for us all.

For more information on how to participate in the Day of Silence, visit glsen. org/day-silence. Q D’Anne Witkowski is a poet, writer and comedian living in Michigan with her wife and son. She has been writing about LGBT politics for over a decade. Follow her on Twitter @MamaDWitkowski.

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sex and salt lake city

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Thank you for 50 years of Happy Pride

BY DR. LAURIE BENNETT-COOK

Fifty years

ago, Pride Season certainly didn’t start out as a time for celebration. A brick thrown, countless arrests, fights in the streets that lasted for several days; a march; a daring proclamation of equality as a human right; and now — events and celebrations around the globe. I don’t know that our predecessors could have foreseen the impact they’ve had.

June 28 will mark 50 years since the Stonewall riots broke out. The riots lasted several days and still stand out as one of the most historic events our nation has seen. With many things in life, once we step forward into something that allows us to breath our authenticity it is nearly impossible to step back.

As the riots cooled, it was apparent that things would never go back as they were.

From that single event a momentum was created that led to the founding of official organizations and activist groups meant to create safety for those who identify outside the heteronormative status quo.

The organized march that followed a year later was nothing like the glitzy parade and park full of vendors we see today. It was everyday people, hurt and angry, fighting for their civil rights. While thousands turned out to march, an equal amount of people turned out to protest.

Now, today, the way so many people zealously express themselves is tangible.

Flags fly generously in representation of Lesbian, Transgender, Bisexual, Gay, BDSM, Polyamorous, Races, Ages, Asexual, and the list goes on and on. Regardless of anyone’s gender, sexual orientation, race, relationship configuration, dress, any of it. Everyone celebrates everyone and everyone celebrates themselves.

“Happy Pride!” is the greeting of the day and it is easy to feel a bit Utopian.

But somewhere in all that blissful Utopia it is easy to forget just how hard of a fight it was to get to this point — or how much we still have to fight for. So this

Pride season, let us give thanks to those who have paved, and who are paving, the way. Without whom, we wouldn’t be able to gear up in bold, blatant celebration.

Thank you to our predecessors. Thank you to those who were too angry to tolerate another day of inequality. Thank you for those who threw rocks and rioted in the streets because they knew they had value.

Thank you to those who have gone to jail, serving time for acts which are consensual expressions of love. Thank you to allies willing to leave the safety of blending in to fight for the rights of those who are unable fight for themselves.

Thank you to those who give shelter and food to the gay and transgender youth — many who find themselves on the street because their families of origin are too concerned with their sexual or gender identities to give them the love and support they need.

Thank you to those who brave publicly holding hands with the person they love, knowing the very harmless act could have them arrested, beaten up, or both. Thank you to those who dance with someone of the same sex. Thank you to those who follow their hearts and risk being discovered their roommate is really their partner.

Thank you to those who serve(d) in the armed forces, living day in and day out in a body that is not aligned with their gender, or hiding a same sex attraction — serving a country that creates laws set to destroy them.

Thank you to those who raise children that heteronormative families won’t adopt.

Thank you to those who create organizations and advocacy groups to protect the rights and safety of marginalized communities. Thank you to those who push for legislation that acknowledges who we choose to be sexual with, how we choose to express our gender or sexuality, and who we choose to love, are human rights.

Thank you to those who by their very existence flip off the world around them

by choosing to express themselves in a manner that serves their own authenticity and not the comfort of those around them. For every act that leads to more equality, more understanding, more acceptance, more knowledge — Thank You. To our youth, you have some incredible examples to follow and look to. More than likely I won’t be around to see what the next 50 years brings on our Pride front, but I am confident there will be more strides of pride.

To all those making a mark and moving us forward — Thank You. Happy Pride! Q Dr. Laurie Bennett-Cook is a Clinical Sexologist and maintains private therapy practices in both LA and SLC. She can be reached at DrLaurieBennettCook@gmail.com

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Issue 298 | APRIL 18, 2019

lambda lore

The 1992 Utah hate crime bill

BY BEN WILLIAMS

The first

attempt in Utah to include sexual orientation as part of a hate crime bill was introduced in the 1992 Legislative Session by House Minority Leader Rep. Frank Pignanelli, who had been lobbied by the Gay and Lesbian Utah Democrats.

GLUD used statistics compiled by Michael Aaron’s Anti-Violence Project to convince Pignanelli the necessity of legislation that would impose increased penalties for crimes committed against a person because of the victim’s race, religion, ancestry, national origin, ethnicity, or sexual orientation.

A Dan Jones opinion poll found that Utahns were split whether gays should be included in a hate-crimes law. Opposition came from both Republicans and Democrats with the catch phrase, “Special Rights” bandied about. Most Republicans and some Democrats on the House Judiciary Committee indicated they didn’t want to include homosexuals in the bill.

Former state legislator Merrill Nelson summed up the general consensus of the state legislature when he said “homosexuals should not be given special status under the new bill, considering that sodomy is against the law in Utah.”

However, Pignanelli, after learning at least half of all hate crimes committed in Utah were committed against gays and lesbians, told other lawmakers it made little sense to have a hate-crime law that excluded them.

The Utah lawmakers were lobbied by three ultra conservative groups who viewed homosexuality a threat to society. Those organizations that were against the inclusion of “sexual orientation” in the bill were primarily the Evergreen Foundation, Families Alert, and the Utah Eagle Forum.

Evergreen, whose mission was to

change the sexual orientation of homosexuals, stated while gays should be protected against hate crimes just as any other type of person, said: “However, supporting laws to protect deviant people against hate crimes does not mean that we should stop condemning their sexual perversions and taking prudent and lawful measures to protect society against those sexual perversions.”

Mormon Moralist Joy Beech of Families Alert said statistics show that a number of homosexuals molest children.

“Sodomy is a crime in Utah,” Beech said, “we should not give privilege to those who actually violate our laws and are criminals.”

Gayle Ruzicka of the conservative Utah Eagle Forum supported Beech’s position saying, “Acts of homosexuality are illegal. I can’t believe that you would place a higher penalty on a gang that raped a homosexual youth than on one that raped my daughter. Why not just enforce our current laws?”

When it was reported that the lawmakers were considering passing the hate crime bill without including sexual orientation, a large protest rally was held Feb. 2, at the State Capitol; which was in vain.

Pignanelli’s bill was passed but failed to include sexual orientation. The hatecrime law passed by the Utah State Legislature dropped sexual orientation from having a protected status even though it was GLUD that had pushed so strongly for a hate crime bill. The legislation made it a 3rd-degree felony to intimidate or terrorize a person based upon a person’s religion or race in violation of their civil rights.

At the state Democrat Party convention in 1990, GLUD was called “a new political powerhouse” by KUTV news reporter Rod Decker, and soon became one of the largest caucuses in the party

Former Rep. Frank Pignanelli

to be feared by conservative Democrats.

Under the leadership of Committee Chairman Michael Aaron and Executive Director Dale Sorenson, GLUD organized the gay community into a political force within Utah’s Democrat Party.

At the 1992 Utah State Democrat Convention, delegates debated gay issues, including hate crime legislation, anti-discrimination ordinances, and gay teen suicide. The Utah Democrat platform contained a plank forbidding sexual orientation discrimination in the conduct of party affairs.

However, conservative Democrats tried to remove “sexual orientation” from the discrimination clause. Sorenson would have none of that and lobbied fiercely to keep sexual orientation in the original language. In the end, “sexual orientation” remained in the Utah Democrat’s platform.

More importantly, GLUD managed to defeat incumbent Democrat Ted Lewis, who had voted against including sexual orientation in the 1992 Hate Crimes Bill. Lewis was replaced by Pete Suazo, who eventually was elected to fill Lewis’ former seat in Utah’s House of Representatives.

Additionally GLUD pushed Salt Lake County commissioners to adopt an anti-discrimination ordinance drafted

by David Nelson. In 1992, Salt Lake County government consisted of only three commissioners. At the time they

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were two Democrats, Randy Horiuchi and Jim Bradley, and one Republican, Mike Stewart.

Commissioner Horiuchi agreed to sponsor David Nelson’s anti-discrimination ordinance which included sexual orientation because he experienced discrimination firsthand as a member of a racial minority.

The Salt Lake County Board of Commissioners approved the ordinance 2-to-1 when Horiuchi and Bradley voted to adopt the anti-discrimination ordinance.

It was the first governmental ban on gay discrimination in Utah, although, in 1991, the University of Utah adopted an anti-discrimination policy that included sexual orientation.

Eagle Forum Director Gayle Ruzicka said her organization was caught off guard

by Salt Lake County’s “hasty action” of passing a protection law for gays and she promised her “organization would be ready next time.”

At the 1992 Republican State Convention, Don Ruzicka, Gayle’s husband, denounced homosexuals as a “health threat.”

He also helped write the state Republican platform which claimed, “The greatest discrimination that currently exists is treating AIDS as a civil rights issue rather than as a public health issue.”

Dale Sorensen, however, was jubilant over the win on the county level and boasted, “We plan to take this ordinance to the legislature and every other county and city.”

On a roll, GLUD asked Salt Lake City Mayor Deedee Corradini if she would sign an executive order prohibiting discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation for the city and then work to include sexual orientation as a specific protected category in the city’s ordinances. She, however, turned down the request without explanation. Q

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We’re selling”

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Online and at over 350 locations across the Wasatch Front We also have marriage counselors

28 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | A&E

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Issue 298 | APRIL 18, 2019

ART EXHIBITIONS

DRAG SHOWS

RED BUTTE GARDEN presents artist Tatiana Varela who was born in Colombia and immigrated to the United States 20 years ago. Before immigrating to America, she took up Batik art, an Indonesian discipline involving the production of dyeing colored patterns using beeswax onto a canvass. Her patterns depict the flora and fauna of her native South America, with beautiful images of plants, flowers, and especially tropical birds.

JRC Events presents JINKX MONSOON, and blowing on stage with her (umm, that sounds wrong and yet pleasing) are Gia Bianca Stephens, Rose, Aphrodeity, Linnox Green, Mandy Morphone, Georgia DeMoan, with DJ Shutter and DJ Justin Hollister. Sounds like everyone on stage will get a little winded, just sayin’!

Tony’s 19 Gay Agenda CONCERTS

FRIDAY — TATIANA VARELA BATIK ART EXHIBIT

20

SATURDAY — JINKX MONSOON

Metro Music Hall, 615 W. 100 South, 9 p.m., age 21+.

Tickets $20-100, jrcslc.com

Red Butte Garden, 300 Wakara Way, UofU, times vary through May 26. Admission prices vary, redbuttegarden.org

BY TONY HOBDAY

The indie pop trio, LOVELYTHEBAND takes to the stage in Salt Lake City and most likely (and hopefully) perform their hit “Broken”, as well as other great songs like “These Are My Friends” and “Finding It Hard to Smile”. Included are guest performances by Flora Cash and Jagwar Twin.

The SALT LAKE MEN’S CHOIR Spring Concert wishes it to be a great Disney ride. And while it will succeed in that, I’m worried that Michael Aaron will come out as Cinderella (because that’s how gay his ego is) when he should be clad as Cruella De Vil (still a big gay ego, but more fitting).

23 26

TUESDAY — LOVELYTHEBAND

The Depot, 13 N. 400 West, 8 p.m. Tickets $20 Adv/$25 Day of, smithstix.com

FRIDAY — SLMC’S WHEN YOU WISH: A DISNEY CONCERT

Highland High School, 2166 South 1700 East, 7:30 p.m., through Saturday. Tickets $20, brownpapertickets.com

DANCE RIRIE-WOODBURY DANCE presents Bloom, a program that includes two world premieres: one by acclaimed choreographer Stephen Koester and one by Artistsic Director Daniel Charon. It also marks the return of The Opposite of Killing (2011) by Tzveta Kassabova.

18

THURSDAY — BLOOM

Black Box Theatre, Rose Wagner Center, 138 W. 300 South, 7:30 p.m., through Saturday. Tickets $15-35, artsaltlake.org

SPECIAL ENGAGEMENTS Fusing together elements of cirque acrobatics and classical dance, TROUPE VERTIGO brings audiences on a jaw-dropping journey through the world of artistic movement — all backed by the thrilling sounds of the Utah Symphony. Brace yourself for a a surprising and delightful night of entertainment.

19

FRIDAY — CIRQUE DANCES WITH TROUPE VERTIGO AND THE UTAH SYMPHONY

Abravanel Hall, 123 W. South Temple, 7:30 p.m., through Saturday. Tickets $15-90, artsaltlake.org

THEATRE UTAH REPERTORY THEATER presents Love and Sex in the Digital Age, an exploration of how instant connection has changed the way we communicate, and how much things have remained the same. First seen at the 2016, and 2017 GSL Fringe festivals respectively, Love and Sex combines two different plays, edited and rewritten to fit together into one night of tantalizing theater.

25

THURSDAY — LOVE AND SEX IN THE DIGITAL AGE

Studio Theatre, Rose Wagner Center, 138 W. 300 South, times vary, through Sunday. Tickets $10, artsaltlake.org

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Broadway at the Eccles 2019/20 season where #youwillbefound Broadway at the Eccles announced the 2019/20 season, which includes their production of the winner of six Tony Awards, DEAR EVAN HANSEN. Also slated are more renowned musicals, a Disney favorite, a work by gay playwright Terrence McNally, and special engagement of THE ILLUSIONISTS. Experience the acclaimed new production of the legendary musical MISS SAIGON, from the creators of Les Misérables, Oct. 15–20.

It’s the story of a young Vietnamese woman named Kim who is orphaned by war and forced to work in a bar run by a notorious character known as The Engineer. There she meets and falls in love with an American G.I. named Chris, but they are torn apart by the fall of Saigon. For three years, Kim goes on an epic journey of survival to find her way back to Chris, who has no idea he’s fathered a son.

Featuring stunning spectacle and a sensational cast of 42 performing the soaring score, including Broadway hits like “The Heat is On in Saigon,” “The Movie in My Mind,” “Last Night of the World” and “American Dream,” it’s a theatrical event you will never forget.

Next comes A CHRISTMAS STORY, THE MUSICAL, bringing the classic 1983 movie to hilarious life on stage, Dec. 3–8.

It chronicles young and bespectacled Ralphie Parker as he schemes his way toward the holiday gift of his dreams, an official Red Ryder Carbine-Action 200-Shot Range Model Air Rifle (“You’ll shoot your eye out kid!”).

An infamous leg lamp, outrageous pink-bunny pajamas, a maniacal department store Santa, and a triple-dog-dare to lick a freezing flagpole are just a few of the distractions that stand between Ralphie and his Christmas wish.

FIDDLER ON THE ROOF opens the new year, Jan. 21–26. Tony-winning director Bartlett Sher and the team behind South Pacific, The King and I, and 2017 Tony-winning Best Play Oslo, bring a fresh and authentic vision to this beloved

theatrical masterpiece from Tony winner Joseph Stein and Pulitzer Prize winners Jerry Bock and Sheldon Harnick.

The original production won 10 Tony Awards, including a special Tony for becoming the longest-running Broadway musical of all time. You’ll be there when the sun rises on this new production by a wonderful cast and a lavish orchestra telling this heartwarming story of fathers and daughters, husbands and wives, and the timeless traditions that define faith and family.

Broadway at the Eccles follows with DEAR EVAN HANSEN, March 4–14, 2020.

In the groundbreaking show — winner of six Tony awards, including Best Musical — a letter that was never meant to be seen, a lie that was never meant to be told, a life he never dreamed he could have finally presents awkward Evan a real chance to fit in. Dear Evan Hansen is the deeply personal and profoundly contemporary musical about life and the way we live it.

A month into Spring, 2020, Broadway at the Eccles presents DISNEY’S ­FROZEN, April 15–May 10. A mysterious secret. A family torn apart. As one sister struggles with being an outsider and harnessing her powers within, the other sets out on a thrilling adventure to bring her family together once again. Both are searching for love, but they’ll learn that to find it they’ll have to look inside themselves first.

An unforgettable theatrical experience filled with sensational special effects,

stunning sets and costumes, and powerhouse performances, Frozen is everything you want in a musical: It’s moving. It’s spectacular. And above all, it’s pure Broadway joy.

Closing the 2019/20 season with a resurrection, June 9–14, is ANASTASIA, a dazzling show that transports us from the twilight of the Russian Empire to the euphoria of Paris in the 1920s, as a brave young woman sets out to discover the mystery of her past. Pursued by a ruthless Soviet officer determined to silence her, Anya enlists the aid of a dashing conman and a lovable ex-aristocrat. Together, they embark on an epic adventure to help her find home, love, and family.

Anastasia features a book by celebrated gay playwright Terrence McNally, a lush new score by Stephen Flaherty (music) and Lynn Ahrens (lyrics) with direction

by Tony Award-winner Darko Tresnjak.

SPECIAL ADD-ON It’s no ignus fatuus, Broadway at the Eccles truly presents THE ILLUSIONISTS — LIVE FROM BROADWAY, Feb. 14–16.

The mind-blowing spectacular showcases the jaw-dropping talents of the most incredible illusionists on earth. The show has shattered box office records across the globe and dazzles audiences of all ages with a powerful mix of the most outrageous and astonishing acts ever to be seen on stage. It’s a non-stop show packed with thrilling and sophisticated magic of unprecedented proportions. Q Individual tickets are not yet available. For season passes or the wait-list option, visit broadway-at-the-eccles.com.

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Qsaltlake.com |

Scottish Ballet joins Ballet West’s Choreographic Festival Ballet West will welcome the renowned Scottish Ballet to the line-up of the third annual Choreographic Festival at the Rose Wagner Performing Arts Center, May 9–11. In celebration of its 50th anniversary, Scottish Ballet, under the leadership of artistic director Christopher Hampson, presents Artist-in-Residence, Sophie Laplane’s new work, Sibilo.

“I am excited that Chris chose this unique and dynamic work from Sophie Laplane,” said Ballet West Artistic Director Adam Sklute. “Sibilo’s quirky humor and interesting groupings make the work perfect for the Choreographic Festival as it explores movement, sound, and theatrics through the prism of ballet.”

Laplane’s inventive piece for eight dancers features whistling (Sibilo is ‘whistle’ in Latin) along with additional music from Glasgow’s Alex Menzies that modulates from electronica to mid-century pop music. The result is hilarious, moving, and eccentric.

“We are delighted to be presenting Sibilo by Sophie, during a celebratory year for the company,” said Hampson. “It is great to see Sophie’s work recognized on an international level, and fitting for it to be programmed in a festival that celebrates the future of ballet.”

Laplane said, “I am delighted to present Sibilo at the Ballet West Choreographic Festival, and to see Scottish Ballet per-

form the work in a celebratory year for the company.

“As a choreographer, it is exciting to see my work being presented on an international stage, and for Sibilo to get

its American premiere in a festival that ‘programmes’ and celebrates new choreography.”

Also, during the Choreographic Festival, is a world premiere from celebrated choreographer and BalletMet Artistic Director Edwaard Liang, along with premieres by Ballet West artists Emily Adams, Katlyn Addison, and Trevor Naumann.

This year, the festival offers ancillary events, adding educational and entertaining experiences. On Wednesday, May 8 at 7 p.m., at the Rose, Ballet West will screen Danseur, a recently released First Wednesdays at 7pm at the independent film Utah Pride Center from Scott Gormley 1380 S Main St that explores gender Info at bit.ly/UGHS_Lecture inequality in ballet, Read ‘This Day in Gay Utah History’ at benwilliamsblogger.blogspot.com

Issue 298 | APRIL 18, 2019

and shines a light on bullying, homophobia, and other barriers for young men in the industry.

Tickets are $8 for adults and $5 for students. Afterward, dance teacher and journalist Kate Mattingly leads a panel discussion with Adam Sklute and Ballet West dancers.

Ticket holders are also encouraged

to attend Warm-Ups in the Rose Room.

These free educational lectures, one hour before evening performances will be hosted by Artistic Directors, choreographers, and dancers.

Finally, local artists will makeover the balcony of the Rose Wagner with an exhibit, “Art of Ballet” displaying the oil, photography, and contemporary works showing the athleticism and beauty of the art form.

“Every year I look forward to this Festival,” said Sklute. “The terrific camaraderie that is built between all the companies is so inspiring. It is about taking chances. It is about seeing what other companies are doing. And it’s about learning from one another.

“This year’s program will certainly take those same risks and I’m thrilled that we are welcoming our first international company. I know our audiences will be fulfilled by the exploration.” Q The Choreographic Festival will be held at the Rose Wagner Performing Arts Center, 138 W. Broadway, Salt Lake City. Tickets start at $50, and available by calling 801-8696900, or online at balletwest.org.

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Salt Lake Men’s Choir brings Disney to the stage with When You Wish...

The Salt Lake Men’s Choir, now in its 36th or 37th year (no one can agree), is headed to Disneyland during Gay Days Anaheim in October.

The group is slated to sing onstage as a guest of Disneyland.

You can see a peek of what songs they will perform at the choir’s annual spring concert, April 26–27 at 7:30 p.m. at Highland High School.

From the ubiquitous “When You Wish Upon a Star” from Disney’s 1940 adaptation of Pinocchio to “Remember Me” from Disney-Pixar’s 2017 Coco, the choir will sing favorites through the years.

Screenwriter and songwriter Robert Sherman said that Walt Disney’s favorite song was “Feed the Birds” from the 1964 version of Mary Poppins.

“On Fridays, after work, [​Walt Disney would] often

invite us into his office and we’d talk about things that were going on at the Studio.

After a while, he’d wander to the north window, look out into the distance and just say, “Play it,” and Dick would wander over to the piano and play ‘Feed the Birds’ for him. One time just as Dick was almost finished, under his breath, I heard Walt say, ‘Yep. That’s what it’s all about.’”

It is a choir favorite as well.

The tear-jerker “God Help the Outcasts” will take on a new meaning this year, as the song was written for Disney’s The Hunchback of Notre Dame.

Several boisterous and happy songs are, of course, included to round out the evening, including “Sieze the Day” from Newsies. Q

Long Live the Queen!

Tickets are $20 at saltlakemenschoir.org.

Utah Symphony 2019–20 season ‘An agreeable sensation of bliss” The Utah Symphony held a press announcement of the 2019–20 season — the 8oth season — at Clark Planetarium, a vital collaborator to the season’s theme called “Feel it for Yourself” which will intersect nature, art, culture and live classical music.

THE PLANETS Celebrating the 40th anniversary of the opening of Abravanel Hall with Beethoven’s overture The Consecration of the House. Re-visit every planet in our solar system with Holst’s beloved tour guide, The Planets. Expand into new corners of the universe with contrasting cosmic sounds by Haydn, Messiaen, and Saariaho. Re-live the drama and anticipation of the greatest space story ever told with the Main Title of John Williams’ Star Wars.

¡CELEBRACIÓN SINFÓNICA! In celebration Hispanic Heritage month, there’s one thing to be learned about classical music from Latin America, and it’s that there’s much more than many of us have had the chance to hear.

Explore some of its greatest composers in a program with highlights such as Moncayo’s Huapango and Chavez’ Sinfonía india, of which John Cage once said it “is the land we all walk on made audible.”

First-time Exam, Bite-wing X-rays, Cleaning New patients only.

Limitations and exclusions may apply.

Not valid with any other offers.

Dr Josef Benzon, DDS Located in Bountiful and Salt Lake City

THE MUSIC OF JOHN WILLIAMS The composer who scored our lives and gifted us some of the most popular movie scores of all time receives due recognition at this celebration of his music. Relive your favorite movie soundtracks with highlights from Jurassic Park, E.T., Superman, and other John Williams scores. Q

Salt Lake 2150 S. Main St 104 801-883-9177

Bountiful 425 S. Medical Dr 211 801-397-5220

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To schedule an appointment, please call 801.878.1700 Evening and Saturday Appointments Available Most Insurances Accepted

32 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | FOOD & DRINK

Qsaltlake.com |

Issue 298 | APRIL 18, 2019

restaurant review

Lasciviousness to lasagna: Caffé Molise

BY JOSHUA JONES AND STEVE FINAU

It was at

least 30 pounds and 15 years ago at Club Splash when Steve and I had our first tripartite. (I’m using that word because I know Michael Aaron would hate to publish the word threeway.) It was exhilarating, fun, risky, and sexy. We both enjoyed it, talked about it, and moved on. There were other adventurous explorations, but none as audacious — or fulfilling — as that first time.

Club Splash closed, along with a dozen other gay bars and clubs, and we moved on too. We bought a house together, cars, and started to cook… it is amazing how quickly you can move from being the kitty at the club to the cougar who cares for barn cats in the back yard.

We are adulting now. Or, we are trying.

Late last year, in that place that

launched a thousand orgies — home to audacious stories of drug-fueled parties, a renaissance occurred.

A million dollars later, what had been Club Bay, Club Splash, the Vortex, and a Fraternal Order of the Eagles, became Caffé Molise and in the basement, BTG Wine Bar. Fred Moesinger and Aimee Sterling moved their Salt Lake institution just two blocks south.

Maturing take many forms.

Some boys stay in that halcyon of club and youth euphoria, others grow and mature.

Where do we land? Not sure.

But, we know that Moesinger and Sterling have designed a storied building that exudes maturity,

elegance, and familiarity. It feels grownup, and we are ready for it. From Easter Sunday Family brunches, to Pride Day Tea Parties, everyone will feel welcome.

Oh the food? From the duck meatballs with orange glaze to a traditional lasagna, the cuisine on our three visits perfect. The longtime favorite — spicedrubbed, oven-roasted pork tenderloin with fig compote was somehow elevated. Also, the vegetarian eggplant meatballs with shallot and tomato cream was a vegetarian’s tongue orgasm. Yes, the pool was bulldozed. The aquarium is gone. The Speedo-clad boy under a waterfall is washed away. We all grow up, and this elegantly tiled, white table-clothed restaurant is a thoughtful and wonderful renovation for a new generation — perhaps the same generation that was here 15 years ago. Q

APRIL 18, 2019 |

FOOD & DRINK | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 33

Issue 298 | Qsaltlake.com

DINING GUIDE Fabby Award Winner

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34 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | COMICS

Qsaltlake.com |

Issue 298 | APRIL 18, 2019

APRIL 18, 2019 |

PUZZLES | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 35

Issue 298 | Qsaltlake.com

Auto Eroticism Each Sudoku puzzle has a unique solution which can be reached logically without guessing. Enter digits 1 through 9 into the blank spaces. Every row must contain one of each digit, as must each column and each 3x3 square. Qdoku

Q doku Medium

8 9 6 7

1

3 9

4

9

8

4 7 9

9 8 4 5 6

9 4 2 3

4 9 8

6

9 2 4

2 8

3 1 9 7 6 8

9 1

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8 9 3

7 9 1 6

6

3 5 4 1 5

4

1 6 7 4 1 8

6 3 2 4

5

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6 9 8 8 1 3 2

4 1 7

2 9 8 7

8 6 4 1

4 5 9 6 9 7 5 8 6

4 9 8 4

1 6 9 6

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2 4 3 9

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7

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6

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8 6 4 7

9 1 8 8

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7 6 3

40 ‘70s org. of kidnappers ACROSS 41 Like Trump’s ego 1 Start of a quote by 43 k. d. lang’s “Big Amanita on Sens8 Boned ___” 4 Kate McKinnon 44 More of the quote bits on SNL 47 Hub-to-rim lines 9 More of the quote 48 Author Crowley and others 12 “___ your pardon!”

49 End of the quote 14 Like sex with a 53 Moby Dick chaser historian?

15 Like the Indy 500? 56 Ballet rail 16 Zami: A New Spell- 57 Added stipulations 61 Time that drags ing of My ___ 62 Rampagers go on it 17 Former hotelier 63 Big top barker Helmsley 64 Cheese for Ms. van 18 Nabor’s branch, de Kamp? on TV 65 Goes public 19 More of the quote 66 Hair_’s “___ to Be 22 Went lickety-split Hard” 23 Consenting votes DOWN 24 International 1 Brief amount of agreement secs?

2 Israeli statesman 27 Pool parties?

3 DeGeneres voice role 31 Fagged out 4 Like one’s nuts, 32 Come together perhaps 5 Rub the right way 35 Sound of three 6 Party to men in a tub 7 Jessica of Fried Green 36 Besides that Tomatoes 8 Log Cabin lists 37 Hotties 9 Job for Burr’s Mason 39 Activist Clare 10 Zenith 11 B’way locale Boothe ___

13 Forget to use the KY? 15 Lyricist Bill of Side Show fame 20 Still getting around 21 Mouthful for a stallion 24 Blows away 25 Where to find Norma Bates 26 One of a nice pair of melons 28 Chewy candy 29 Wilde with a statuette?

30 “A Boy Named Sue” writer Silverstein 32 Whipping boy 33 Vet, of a sort, for short 34 Son of Eric the Red 37 Gay nocturnal flyer?

38 Enjoys the bedroom, perhaps 41 Gladly, old-style 42 Airline to Ben Gurion 45 Safe to swallow 46 Line of Todd Oldham clothing?

50 Part of APR 51 Pitcher Hershiser 52 Russian river 53 Vestment for Mychal Judge 54 Heston’s Ben ___ 55 Disney prince 58 Three R’s supporter 59 Article of Marlene Dietrich 60 Like a cunning linguist

36 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | A&E

9 4 2 6 1 8 7 3 5

8 5 1 7 3 2 6 9 4

6 7 3 9 5 4 1 8 2

3 9 5 8 4 7 2 1 6

2 1 7 3 6 9 5 4 8

4 6 8 1 2 5 9 7 3

7 3 6 2 8 1 4 5 9 6 8 1 3 7 2 8 4 5 6 9 1

1 8 4 5 9 6 3 2 7 9 5 4 1 6 8 3 9 2 5 4 7

5 7 2 4 3 8 6 9 1

9 4 3 1 7 6 2 8 5

6 1 8 5 9 2 7 4 3

3 4 2 5 9 1 7 8 6 3 1 5 4 2 9 8 3 1 7 6 5

5 9 1 7 6 8 2 3 4 8 6 9 5 1 7 6 4 9 3 8 2

6 7 8 2 4 3 1 9 5 2 4 7 8 3 6 5 7 2 1 4 9

6 4 3 1 5 7 2 9 8

4 5 3 6 1 2 8 7 9

7 9 8 4 2 6 5 3 1

9 8 7 4 3 5 6 2 1

2 5 1 3 9 8 6 7 4

1 2 6 8 7 9 5 4 3

3 6 4 9 1 5 8 2 7

2 3 9 1 8 6 4 5 7

9 7 5 2 8 3 4 1 6

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Celebrate Your Pride!

could really make a difference in your life and those around you? Think about it.

There are dozens of reasons why getting involved in your community is important but I will sum it up to this: it’s good for you and it’s really good for those around you. And since most people agree but have no idea where to start, here’s a jump start and some ideas on how to get involved in your local community.

While the idea of attending a community meeting might sound about as entertaining as a dentist appointment, they can actually be extremely beneficial. You meet people who live around you, which comes in handy if you’re one of the many people who complain that your friends live too far away to hang out on a regular basis. Moreover, you really become familiar with what’s happening in your neighborhood and more than likely, you’ll gain a real sense of ownership of where you live. The more this happens, the better!

Picking up trash might not sound too appealing, but there are hundreds of parks and playgrounds around that could use some attention. Often times starting or joining a clean-up project can really transform a neighborhood, especially if you’re creating a place for people to gather.

If you have a place in mind, 7 9 5 6 8 3 2 1 4

fun. But while most of us are vacationing or relaxing at the pool, let me give you a little something to think about.

What if you took just a few hours of those summer vacation hours to volunteer in your local community? What if a few hours of your time

6 3 7 1 2 4 9 8 5

With the

cold of winter, a thing of the past, everyone seems a little more relaxed as we look forward to the summer months. For most people, it’s the start of a little less work and a little more

2 4 9 5 3 8 1 7 6

BY BROCK KANNAN

Issue 298 | APRIL 18, 2019

ask mr. manners

5 8 1 9 6 7 4 2 3

Get active

Qsaltlake.com |

make sure you reach out to the administrator before you make any changes. If you want some ideas, call the local Utah parks department for locations that could use your help.

If you’re complaining that there’s “not a (insert your favorite thing) in my area,” take the initiative and start one yourself. There are probably at least a few others thinking the same thing. Whether it’s a sports team or interest group (like a book club or crafting night), your neighbors will appreciate someone stepping up and taking leadership of the group.

Spend some time perusing various social media outlets to see if there are any local pages/groups and see if anything similar exists. If not, go for it! And even if you do find an existing group, that just means you get to join a broader organization and expand your network – it’s a win either way!

Getting involved in your community isn’t hard and with a little time, you can make a big difference. And the best part? Volunteering is addicting and contagious, so once you start, you will probably want to keep doing it…and so will those around you! So, this summer go forth spreading some cheer, we can all use some happiness. Q

APRIL 18, 2019 |

A&E | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 37

Issue 298 | Qsaltlake.com

q scopes APRIL

BY SAM KELLEY-MILLS

ARIES March 20–April 19

Friends from the past will appear in a quick and surprising manner. Welcome or not, there are memories attached to these people. Buried emotions will rise to the surface. Evaluate your feelings carefully and tread lightly. The past is remembered differently from others.

Misunderstandings could result in conflict.

TAURUS Apr 20–May 20

Priorities of equal importance flood your agenda.

Discouragement ensues without a clear first step, and progress is stalled.

Career woes should be handled lightly, while relationship and family matters demand a direct approach. Patience is good, but don’t delay. Draining the pressures of life will provide immediate relief.

GEMINI May 21–June 20

The future seems unclear and a path undefined. This would be fine if you knew the general direction things were going. A normal sense of

adventure is notably missing, but do not fret. Life continues moving forward and will eventually show its cards.

Now is not a good time to gamble, so some caution would be wise.

CANCER June 21–July 22

You’ve kept a big secret for a while. However, everyone already knows what the secret is! Don’t fear to let friends know what defines you, as it will make the world much easier to deal with. Being out of your comfort zone could take time to adjust to, but being exposed can be very liberating. Freedom is a gift to yourself.

LEO July 23–August 22

A helping hand comes from a family member. A humble nature will emerge as a result, and a new perspective will shape your outlook.

Spend time with those close to you, and don’t let a moment of anger overcome your sensibilities. Staying calm when things heat up is encouraged.

The last thing needed right now is deep regret.

VIRGO August 23–Sep. 22

A big change is coming, so be prepared. Nothing is more frustrating than feeling like everyone is too busy. But it’s a good time for reflection and personal expression.

Splurge a little, but don’t venture too

far from the familiar. A neat friend will make a surprise appearance. However, be aware of some romantic intentions.

LIBRA Sept 23–October 22

spawns from coziness, especially in matters of the heart.

CAPRICORN Dec 21–Jan 19

Dreams can be frightening if the truth is mistaken for logic.

Don’t blow things out of proportion without measuring the extent of reality. Family members take advantage of insecurities, so avoid a tragedy before it starts. If things don’t feel right, make the necessary adjustments.

Small changes make the biggest of differences.

There is no such thing as a perfect life, but perfect moments are possible. Great moments will occur during this time, especially in business matters. An intriguing opportunity will be a powerful lure. Be cautious with individuals who seem too willing to give. Open arms could be a trap. Set restrictions and stand firm.

SCORPIO Oct. 23–Nov. 21

Running away feels good from time to time. This will ring true during this time, Aquarius. Personal entanglements are bound to get sticky, but a little distance will help in overcoming the mess. Eliminate one problem at a time, and free time will flow your way. Relax with a clear head.

A good cry could also be cleansing.

A period of intense emotional strain will lead to an increase of desires. Give in to temptation with a sense of modesty, and satisfaction will be more abundant. An increase in finances will come available, but conservation would be wise. Save for something you really want while being aware of hard times ahead..

SAGITTARIUS

Nov. 22–December 20.

The path to freedom appears in the form of passion and good spirits.

It’s amazing how good someone makes you feel when things get a little tough.

Don’t grow dependent on others for happiness, but if an opportunity for it exists, take advantage of it. Strength

AQUARIUS Jan. 20–Feb. 18

PISCES Feb 19–Mar 19

It could be hard learning skills needed to overcome a problem. Don’t fear asking for help from a buddy. Learn new ways to accomplish goals. A financial situation takes a toll. Spend wisely during this time. Luckily, your wish list is on the light side, so hold off on big purchases until later.Q

38 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | MARKETPLACE

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40 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | QMMUNITY

Qmmunity Groups BUSINESS

LGBTQ-Affirmative Psycho-therapists Guild of Utah  lgbtqtherapists.com * jim@lgbtqtherapists.com Utah Gay & Lesbian Chamber of Commerce  utahgaychamber.com * info@utahgaychamber.com LGBT & Allied Lawyers of Utah  lgbtutahlawyers.com * lgbtutahlawyers@gmail.com Utah Independent Business Coalition  utahindependentbusiness.org 801-879-4928 DOMESTIC VIOLENCE

National Domestic Violence Hotline 1-800-799-7233 YWCA of Salt Lake  ywca.org/ saltlakecity 322 E 300 S 801-537-8600 HEALTH & HIV

Peer Support for Mental Illness — PSMI Thurs 7pm, Utah Pride Ctr Planned Parenthood 654 S 900 E 800-230-PLAN Salt Lake County Health Dept HIV/STD Clinic 660 S 200 E, 4th Floor Walk-ins M–F 10a–4p Appts 385-468-4242

Utah AIDS Foundation  utahaids.org * mail@utahaids.org 1408 S 1100 E 801-487-2323 Weber-Morgan Health Mon., Weds 1-4:30p 477 23rd St, Ogden Appt 801-399-7250 HOMELESS SVCS

VOA Homeless Youth Resource Ctr, ages 15–21 880 S 400 W 801-364-0744 Transition Homes: Young Men’s 801-433-1713 Young Women’s 801-359-5545 LEGAL

Rainbow Law Free Clinic 2nd Thurs 6:30–7:30pm UofU Law School, 383 S University St POLITICAL

Equality Utah  equalityutah.org * info@equalityutah.org 175 W 200 S, Ste 1004 801-355-3479 Utah Libertarian Party 6885 S State St #200 888-957-8824

Qsaltlake.com |

RELIGIOUS

First Baptist Church  firstbaptist-slc.org * office@firstbaptistslc.org 11a Sundays 777 S 1300 E 801-582-4921 Sacred Light of Christ  slcchurch.org 823 S 600 E 801-595-0052 11a Sundays Wasatch Metropolitan Community Church  wasatchmcc.org 801-889-8764 Sundays except the 2nd Sunday, 11:15a at Crone’s Hollow, 3834 S. Main SOCIAL

1 to 5 Club (bisexual)  fb.me/1to5ClubUtah  1to5club@

utahpridecenter.org Alternative Garden Club  bit.ly/altgarden * altgardenclub@gmail.com blackBOARD Men’s Kink/Sex/BDSM education, 1st, 3rd Mons.  blackbootsslc.org blackBOOTS Kink/BDSM Men’s leather/kink/ fetish/BDSM 4th Sats.  blackbootsslc.org

Utah Log Cabin Republicans  bit.ly/logcabinutah 801-657-9611

Gay Writes writing group, DiverseCity 6:30 pm Mondays Community Writing Ctr, 210 E 400 S Ste 8

Utah Stonewall Democrats  utahstonewalldemocrats.org  fb.me/ utahstonewalldems

Men Who Move  menwhomove.org OUTreach Utah Ogden  outreachutah.org

OWLS of Utah (Older, Wiser, Lesbian. Sisters)  bit.ly/owlsutah Queer Friends  queerfriends.org qVinum Wine Tasting  qvinum.com  fb.me /QVinum/ Sage Utah, Seniors  fb.me/sageutah  sageutah@ utahpridecenter.org 801-557-9203 Temple Squares Square Dance Club  templesquares.org 801-449-1293 Utah Bears  utahbears.com  fb.me/utahbears  info@utahbears.com Weds 6pm Raw Bean Coffee, 611 W Temple Utah Male Naturists  umen.org  info@umen.org Utah Pride Center  utahpridecenter.org  info@utahpridecenter.org 1380 S Main St 801-539-8800 Venture OUT Utah  bit.ly/GetOutsideUtah SPORTS

Pride Community Softball League  fb.me/utahpride. softballleague  pcsl@prideleague.com Q Kickball League  fb.me/qsaltlake. kickball Sundays, 10:30, 11:30, Sunnyside Park QUAC — Queer Utah Aquatic Club  quacquac.org  questions@ quacquac.org Salt Lake Goodtime Bowling League  bit.ly/slgoodtime

umen.org

Stonewall Sports of Salt Lake City  fb.me/SLCStonewall  stonewallsaltlakecity. leagueapps.com 385-243-1828

Venture Out Utah  facebook.com/groups/ Venture.OUT.Utah SUPPORT

Alcoholics Anonymous 801-484-7871  utahaa.org LGBT meetings: Sun. 3p Acceptance Group, UPC,1380 S Main Tues. 8:15p Live & Let Live, Mt Tabor Lutheran, 175 S 700 E Wed. 7p Sober Today, 375 Harrison Blvd, Ogden Fri. 8p Stonewall Group, Mt Tabor Lutheran, 175 S 700 E Crystal Meth Anon  crystalmeth.org Sun. 1:30pm Clean, Sober & Proud LGBTQIA+Straight USARA, 180 E 2100 S LifeRing Secular Recovery 801-608-8146  liferingutah.org Sun. 10am Univ. Neuropsychiatric Institute, 501 Chipeta Way #1566 Wed. noon, 2319 Foothill Dr, #120 Weds. 6:30 pm, Univ Neuropsych Institute, 501 Chipeta Way #2705 Thurs. 7pm, USARA, 180 E 2100 S, #100 Sat. 11am, First Baptist Church, 777 S 1300 E Men’s Support Group  utahpridecenter. org/programs/lgbtqadults/  joshuabravo@ utahpridecenter.org Survivors of Suicide Attempt  utahpridecenter.org/ programs/lgbtq-adults/  sosa@ utahpridecenter.org Trans Adult Support  utahpridecenter.org/ programs/lgbtq-adults/  lanegardinier@ utahpridecenter.org

Issue 298 | APRIL 18, 2019

Women’s Support Group  utahpridecenter.org/ programs/lgbtq-adults/  mariananibley@ utahpridecenter.org Youth Support Gro ages 10-14, 14-20  utahpridecenter. org/programs/youthfamily-programs/

Youth Survivors of Suicide Attempt  utahpridecenter.org/ programs/youth-familyprograms/  youthsosa@ utahpridecenter.org YOUTH/COLLEGE

Encircle LGBTQ Family and Youth Resource Ctr  encircletogether.org fb.me/encircletogether 91 W 200 S, Provo, Gay-Straight Alliance Network  gsanetwork.org Kids Like Me (ages 2-10)  utahpridecenter.org/ programs/youth-familyprograms/ Salt Lake Community College LGBTQ+ 8 slcc.edu/lgbtq/ University of Utah LGBT Resource Center 8 lgbt.utah.edu 200 S Central Campus Dr Rm 409 801-587-7973 USGA at BYU  usgabyu.com  fb.me/UsgaAtByu Utah State Univ. Access & Diversity Ctr  usu.edu/ accesscenter/lgbtqa Utah Valley Univ Spectrum  facebook.com/ groups/uvuspectrum Weber State University LGBT Resource Center  weber.edu/ lgbtresourcecenter 801-626-7271 Youth Activity Night ages 10-14, 14-20  utahpridecenter.org/ programs/youth-familyprograms/

APRIL 18, 2019 |

Issue 298 | Qsaltlake.com

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42 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | HEALTH

positive thoughts

Qsaltlake.com |

Issue 298 | APRIL 18, 2019

Why we share our stories

BY JEFF BERRY

In early

September of last year I was attending the United States Conference on AIDS in Orlando and running late for a dinner I had been invited to that evening.

AIDS conferences are the endurance marathons for AIDS activists, from the moment you wake up until you hit your pillow late at night you are literally running from session to meeting to workshop to reception, just to get up and do it all over again. This goes on for a number of days, and you’re lucky if you get five to six hours of sleep each night. Invariably when you get home you are exhausted and spent — but in a good way.

As I was hurrying down a long, wide corridor filled with people scurrying to their own reception/dinner/meeting, one person headed toward me in the opposite direction caught my eye. She seemed to recognize me but I was pretty sure I didn’t know her, and I was late for my dinner, so I smiled back but decided to keep moving. But then as we neared each other we both stopped, and she began to

talk. And my eyes started to well up as she shared her story.

She introduced herself and said she wanted to thank me. When she was incarcerated (she explained then and in a subsequent conversation) they would send her to a local HIV clinic every three months, and that is where she discovered Positively Aware magazine. She told me it gave her hope — I think her exact words were, “It saved my life.” She told me that reading about my personal journey and my own struggles touched her deeply during a dark time in her life (she had learned she was HIV-positive and had lost a friend due to complications from AIDS), but by reading the magazine somehow she knew she was going to be OK. She knew nothing about which regimens to take, or what resources were there for her, but she learned how to formulate questions for her doctor and get the care that she needed.

I told her how glad I was to have made a difference in some small way, and how much it meant to me that she shared her

story with me. We exchanged cards and both went on our busy way, but I have never forgotten that moment — it will stay with me for the rest of my life.

So this is why those of us who work in HIV do what we do, and demonstrates the incredible power that knowledge and sharing our stories can hold. And no matter what field you work in, there is a common thread that weaves throughout all of our stories, that keeps us moving forward and reminds us of our own humanity.

It really does take a village, and it’s important to stop and take the time to listen to each other. No one is an island.

Individually we can make our own personal achievements, but collectively and working together we can change lives.

Take care of yourself, and each other. Q Jeff Berry is the editor in chief of Positively Aware magazine, and Director of Publications at Test Positive Aware Network in Chicago. Find him on Twitter @PAEditor.

This column is a project of Plus, Positively Aware, POZ, TheBody.com, Q Syndicate, nd QSaltLake Magazine.

Know who WANTS your business and will treat you with the DIGNITY and RESPECT you deserve

APRIL 18, 2019 |

BOOKS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 43

Issue 298 | Qsaltlake.com

“Sissy: A Coming-ofGender Story”

BY JACOB TOBIA C.2019, PUTNAM, $26.00 / $35.00 CANADA, 336 PAGES

Nobody can tell you what to do.

To think otherwise is tantamount to telling you what not to do. No, you have your own mind, and you’ll make it up just fine by yourself. Nobody tells you what to do and, as in the new memoir Sissy: A Coming-of-Gender Story by Jacob Tobia, they can’t tell you who you are, either.

Many people who are non-binary, says Tobia, equate coming to terms with gender as “a journey.” Tobias considers theirs “more like an onion,” with layers of discovery “veiled beneath a thin skin.”

It started with Tobia’s parents, both role models: their mother, who was a tomboy at heart; and their father, who ignored stereotypical women’s work and instead, pitched in around the house. The next layer consists of Tobia’s brother and kids in the neighborhood who didn’t think twice about a child who play-fought in the mud one minute, and loved pink tutus and Barbies the next.

But then Tobia started school, and the teasing began.

They “went from being a person to being a sissy” and shame accompanied the label.

When it became apparent that the taunts would be flung at them no matter what, Tobia considered suicide. Church was the only place they “felt unequivocally and unconditionally loved.”

Things changed for the better when puberty hit Tobia and

their peers. Cis boys wanted desperately to be with cis girls, which was something Tobia did effortlessly and it made them “cool” even as it highlighted their differences from other adolescents. By the end of high school, Tobia had chosen the word “gay” to describe themselves, even though it wasn’t quite right.

They came out to a church counselor. They came out to their gay best friend. Years later, they came out to their parents as “gay.” It wasn’t until college, the acquisition of several pairs of high heels, lipstick, and a sheltered sense of security that Tobia realized that their work toward understanding had only started.

Maybe they were boy and girl and neither and both, and not having to question that would be a battle they’d “have to do… all over again.”

Sissy is a one-hundred-percent solid, smack-in-the-middle, okay kind of book. It’s not the best thing you’ll ever read; it’s far, far from the worst.

After a considerable, two-chapter throat-clearing, author Jacob Tobia promises hilarity then gets down to business, about their life, their experiences as a gender nonconforming person making their way through, and the gender-acceptance work to be done. Yes, that may seem like a familiar story but there is uniqueness to be had here: Tobia’s memories of their later adolescence and attendance at a prestigious Eastern college offer something different in this genre, in freshness of voice. Also uncommon: their willingness to admit regret for advice not taken.

Finally, yes, this book is amusing but outright hilarity?

Not so much: you’ll enjoy Sissy, but your gut is in no danger of busting. Still, if memoirs are your thing and your TBR pile is short, you know what to do. Q

MORE THAN

the bookworm sez

80

EVENTS THIS MONTH

Coming up DOWNTOWN 4.18–20 RIRIE-WOODBURY DANCE CO presents BLOOM @ Rose Wagner Performing Arts Center

4.19 SALT LAKE GALLERY STROLL 4.19 LAUGHING STOCK IMPROV COMEDY @ The Off Broadway Theatre 4.1 9–20 THE TABERNACLE CHOIR presents THEIR 2019 EASTER CONCERT @ Tabernacle on Temple Square

4.1 9–20 CIRQUE DANCES WITH TROUPE VERTIGO & THE UTAH SYMPHONY @ Abravanel Hall 4.20 STORY PIRATES: SYMPHONY EXTRAVAGANZA! @ Abravanel Hall

4.26–27 UTAH SYMPHONY presents VILLEGAS PLAYING CONCIERTO DE ARANJUEZ @ Abravanel Hall

THEBLOCKSSLC.COM

44 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | FRIVOLIST

5

Qsaltlake.com |

Issue 298 | APRIL 18, 2019

the frivolist

ways laziness is costing you

BY MIKEY ROX

Laziness

is the byproduct of many catalysts — fear, depression, general unhappiness — and it can negatively affect all facets of your life. From costing you money to ruining relation-ships, here are five ways laziness can turn your world upside down if you let it.

I can celebrate a job well done that I’ve managed to make nearly $67 an hour for myself, money that will now be better spent on the actual trip for dinners, drinks, or an experience I’ll remember for a lifetime.

1.

My marriage didn’t work for many reasons — both faults of our own — but one of my big-gest gripes with my husband was his laziness. For most of our union, I was chef, maid, caregiver to our dog, planner of date nights and vacations, and the instigator of what little sex we had, especially in the later years, and that took a major toll on my self-worth and eventually my general outlook on life. After years of trying to change his behavior (a futile effort in any relationship), I gave up. Not because I wanted to, but rather because I realized that his laziness was a result of not being in love with me. As complicated as our situation was, the root problem was as simple as that. If he could have admitted that about six or seven years earlier, we would’ve saved ourselves a hell of a lot of heart-ache… and money.

Financially

There’s a rather exhaustive list on Forbes.com on the ways laziness can bleed your bank account dry — from failing to negotiate better deals to putting off opening a retirement fund — but these expensive oversights begin on a micro-level, like buying memberships you don’t justify with enough use, for instance. And then there’s the bad habit of simply paying full price for things you buy because you don’t “feel like” looking for discounts or convince yourself you don’t have the time.

With regards to the latter, let me change your mind. Consider, as an example, planning a trip to the supermarket or, on a larger scale, vacation. If you dedicated time to researching savings and discounts, you will find money that you can keep.

Using coupons, cash-back deals, and shopping only sale items at the supermarket can rea-sonably save you upwards of $30 or more on a large order if you’re hitting the savings at all angles. You might think of that as an amount not worthy of your effort, but what if you think of the savings as reward for your time dedication. How much do you make an hour at your full-time? Do you get paid $30 per hour at work? Do you think you deserve to pay yourself $30 an hour at home?

Same principle applies to vacations. I spend several hours searching for savings on every getaway and vacation I take.

If at the end I’ve spent, say, three hours rounding up deals and I’ve saved $200,

2. In Love

3. Health-wise

Your sedentary lifestyle manifests itself in ways that directly impact your health, like weight gain, depression and early death. Any study ever done on exercise will tell you that staying active improves your physical, mental and emotional health in myriad ways. But even if you don’t get too fat to feel good about yourself anymore or kick the bucket in an untimely fashion, the money you will spend on medical services to put a patch on the damage you’re doing to yourself could take you into a debt with no escape or at the very least limit your quality of life because you’re consistently in the doctor’s office when you would have been better off in a gym.

4. Personally

We’re so involved with ourselves these days (when our faces aren’t buried in a device) that we’re all but convinced that we don’t have time for relationships.

The memes are right — like the one where we make plans but cancel at the last minute because we never intended to follow through anyway. Why though?

Don’t our “friends” deserve a couple hours of our time and attention? If not, are they even our friends? Why do we play that game with them then instead of being truthful about not wanting to be around them in the first place? This mentality bleeds right into romantic relationships, too, with the swip-ing right and left and serial dating and the ADD of settling down ruining prospects of happiness that we’re disallowing ourselves. And for what — casual sex and Netflix binges? We can do better than that.

5. Professionally

Laziness at work can get you fired, but it also prevents you from progressing. Your goal should be to show your company your capabilities and that you want to move up the ladder. And if you think you’re doing a killer job at that but not being recognized or compensated for it, schedule a talk with your boss to talk about more responsibilities and, yes, a raise. You may not get it immediately, but at least it’ll be on the table because you were motivated to address the situation.

If the answer is no, reflect on what you have to offer, if those skills are better suited somewhere else, and pursue something greater. You’re singly in control of that. It’s just a matter of how much effort you want to put into your own overall life satisfaction. Q Mikey Rox is an award-winning journalist and LGBT lifestyle expert whose work has been published in more than 100 outlets across the world. He spends his time writing from the beach with his dog Jaxon. Instagram @mikeyrox

APRIL 18, 2019 |

Issue 298 | Qsaltlake.com

FRIVOLIST | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 45

“The best advertising I do” —JAY HALLSTROM

pages Get in the 2019 directory of Utah’s LGBT-friendly businesses today by calling 801-997-9763 or emailing sales@qsaltlake.com

46 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | NEWS

Qsaltlake.com |

Issue 298 | APRIL 18, 2019

APRIL 18, 2019 |

Issue 298 | Qsaltlake.com

NEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 47

48 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | FINAL WORD

Qsaltlake.com |

Issue 298 | APRIL 18, 2019

the perils of petunia pap smear

The tale of the beauty and the beast

BY PETUNIA PAP SMEAR

The road

to the pantry is fraught with danger

and excitement.

It was a dark and stormy night. The wind was howling out of the north and the snow was swirling into tsunami-size drifts.

I was snugly ensconced in the warm and cozy basement of Chateau Pap Smear, seated at the computer desk busily attempting to keep up on my life’s vocation — the sorting of all the porn on the internet.

While “working” I was keeping half an eye on the television located on a shelf above the computer. (I can multitask!) In the middle of deciding whether a photo of a certain admirable Speedo-clad adonis should be sorted into the “Well-Packed Spandex” folder or the “Oh-My-God ABS” folder, I sensed a disturbance in the force.

Out of the corner of my eye, I thought I noticed some movement. As I was home alone, I thought I might be having a spiritual visitation from Judy Garland. A few minutes and 15 photos later, it happened again. I thought that the light from the TV must have been casting shadows through my mascara.

The next day, I was again at the computer desk when my mascara was vindicated. I saw with my own eyes, a mouse run from the laundry room into the fruit room. Yes, Chateau Pap Smear is one of those little old

brick grandma bungalows, and like most Mormon homes, it has a food storage room, otherwise commonly called a “Fruit Room”.

Timidly, I ventured into the fruit room.

Using the lights from my breasticles to shine on the shelves in the dark corners, I looked around and saw to my horror that the rangy rodent had gotten into my sacred stash of Ramen noodles. I felt so violated.

A sense of defilement began to well up in my breasticles. Nothing shall ever come between a queen and her noodles.

I found a lot of mouse turds on the top shelf, so I moved stuff about in search of the animal. Low and behold to my shock and horror, the malevolent mammal actually leaped from the top shelf over my beehive hair to a lower shelf on the opposite wall. Who knew they could jump that far?

I could have sworn it was wearing a cape and cried, “Here he comes to save the day!”

It was indeed a Mighty Mouse.

Thwarted by this first attempt at capture, but disgusted at the quantity of mouse poo left behind, I grabbed my Electrolux and gave the fruit room a good douching. I removed the opened and contaminated noodle packs and threw them in the garbage can beside the computer desk.

The next day, I was sitting at the desk and I thought I heard rustling. I raised my maximus buttockus out of my chair and turned on the light in the fruit room in an attempt to catch the little bugger in the act.

Nothing! As I sat back down, the vermin jumped out of the garbage can, not five inches from my knee and ran away.

Did I scream? Hell yes!

On another occasion, while descending the stairs, I saw the nasty little nutter run under the door into the closet where I keep my coats. I flung open the door endeavoring to catch it, only to find that it had escaped. I investigated the closet for clues. I discovered that the little bitch had eaten a huge hole in the lining of my full-

7pm, April 12, May 17 First Baptist Church, 777 S 1300 E fb.me/matronsofmayhem

length fur coat. THIS MEANT WAR! Livid with righteous indignation, I armed myself for battle. In one hand I held one of my breasticles from my Petunia Closet (the one and only true and everlasting “Fruit Room”) to trap the creepy critter. In the other hand I wielded a golden stiletto with which to spear and or pummel the little rat. All I found were more droppings.

Time to build a better mouse trap! I devised an obstacle course for the little hamster wannabe. I took from my closet all eighteen pairs of breasticles and placed them over each of the perishable food items creating a confusing maze. The fruit room began to resemble a miniature Christmas forest display. At the far end of the forest, I placed some delicious poison. Surely, this should do the trick. After several days of this stake out, the poison was left untouched but the breasticle forest was littered with more droppings. I was in Hell!

I was quickly becoming a Desperate Drag Queen. My inner detective instincts began to emerge. I noticed that there was no evidence at all of mouse infestation in the Petunia Closet. What could possibly be in there that might be repelling the nasty beast? Of course, glitter!

Glitter is the never-ending, non-biodegradable infestation of another kind. So, I unwrapped a Ramen noodle and buried it as bait in a pond of blue glitter at the end of the breasticle forest. A few days later, there was no more evidence of the mouse. Success!

Of course I had to do a little victory hopscotch-like dance over the breasticle forest.

This story leaves us with several important questions: 1. How best should I disinfect any possible contamination of all the breasticles?

2. Should I begin teaching proper food storage techniques in the Relief Society homemaking lessons?

3. Would marking my territory by peeing in the corners be a better mouse deterrent than glitter?

4. Should I pitch the television show Desperate Drag Queens to CBS? 5. Did my glitter trap work, or was it because I called a professional exterminator?

6. Should I apply for a job with Orkin?

These and other eternal questions will be answered in future chapters of The Perils of Petunia Pap Smear. Q

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