QSaltLake Magazine - May 2017 Issue

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UTAH’S GAY, LESBIAN, BISEXUAL, TRANSGENDER AND ALLY

MAGAzINE

OUR ANNUAL GUIDE TO MAY 2017 ISSUE 267

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4 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | FIRST WORD

Qsaltlake.com | issue 267 | May 2017

Dennis McCracken

Artistic Director

Music for the

A Tribute Show

May 12 & 13, 2017 at 7:30pm Bryant Middle School 40 S. 800 E. Salt Lake City, UT

General Admission Tickets: $15

Tickets available now from choir members, at Club Try-Angles, the Salt Lake City Library Store, or online at brownpapertickets.com

M ADAM P AT TIRINI G IN Madam Pattirini Gin — Inspired by one of the more interesting and unknown figures of the American West.

Brigham Morris Young ( January 18, 1854–February 20, 1931) was the son of Brigham Young (his 35th child) and one of his wives, Margaret Pierce.

In 1875, then again in 1883, B . Morris Young served a mission for the LDS Church in the Hawaiian Islands.

I n 1885 Young, his wife and their children returned from serving his second mission in the Hawaiian Islands. Shortly after returning to Utah, Young began publicly performing in drag as Italian opera diva “Madam Pattirini.” Young performed as Pa Pattirini in north and central Utah venues from 1885 to the 1900s. He could produce a convincing falsetto, and many in the audience did not realize that Pattirini was Young.

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Qsaltlake.com | issue 267 | May 2017

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QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 9

May 2017 | issue 267 | Qsaltlake.com

staffbox

publisher/editor Michael Aaron

in this issue 18

copy editor Tony Hobday designer Christian Allred sales Craig Ogan national advertising representative: Rivendell Media, 212-242-6863 sales@rivendellmedia.com contributors Diane AndersonMinshall, Chris Azzopardi, Paul Berge, Jeff Berry, Dave Brousseau, Tyson Daley, Mikki Enoch, Jack Fertig, Greg Fox, Charles Lynn Frost, Oriol Gutierrez Jr., Tony Hobday, Christopher Katis, Princess Kennedy, Rock Magen, Sam Mills, Mikey Rox, Gregg Shapiro, Petunia Pap Smear, Steven Petrow, Ed Sikov, Peter Stoker, Marcy Taylor-Rizzi, Ben ­Williams, D’Anne ­Witkowski distribution Bradley Jay Crookston,

James Enoch, Alana Luckart, Kevin Sevcik

Sneak Peek to Utah Pride

Headliner announced, plus the prices, times and venues you need to know..

Copyright © 2017, Salt Lick Publishing, LLC. All rights reserved. No material may be reprinted or reproduced without written permission from the publisher. 8–12,000 copies are distributed free of charge at over 300 locations across the state. Free copies are limited to one per person.

For additional copies, call 801-997-9763. It is a crime to destroy or dispose of current issues or otherwise interfere with the distribution of this magazine. Printed in the USA on recycled paper.

Please recycle this copy when done.

FEATURE �����������������������������������������������������������26 Summer Music Guide Kiss of a Spider Woman FOOD & DRINK �������������������������������������������36 Fireside on Regent Street Holiday dinners gone by LIFESTYLE ���������������������������������������������������������46 Utah’s Most Eligible LGBT Singles Pride from across North America

Waiting for summer flip-flops

CONTACT EMAILS: general: info@qsaltlake.com editorial: editor@qsaltlake.com sales: sales@qsaltlake.com

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Festivals all up and down the Wasatch Front, speaks with our Chris and in Park City and Logan Azzopardi

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NEWS ���������������������������������������������������������������������9 National and world news of the month Stan Penfold to step down from city council Chris Wharton stepping up for council run Gay man shot and killed in South Salt Lake

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26

BY MICHAEL AARON

Trump

should have been a gymnast.

He says things, then says he never said them. Promises things then renegs on the promise. Says he’ll let things stand, then quashes them with s not-so-quick flick of a caligraphic marker.

He’s done more flip flopping than Nadia Comaneci, but isn’t nearly as nice to watch.

I remember an October evening watching Trump waving a rainbow flag and declaring he’s a friend of the LGBT community.

I also remember the past 100 days when he’s put rabidly homo- and trans-phobic people on his cabinet.

I remember the palpable fear from LGBT leaders that he would sign away the protections Obama ordered for LGBT federal employees, only to be reassured in January that the order would remain.

Then, on the final day of March, he rescind-

ed the Fair Pay and Safe Workplaces order, weakening those protections.

His cabinet is doing what is expeceted of Phobes in Charge as well.

Attorney General Loretta Lynch in the Obama administration said she and the government “see” and “stand with” transgender people and issued a sweeping directive.

Under Trump’s Jeff Sessions, that directive was reversed.

I fear further flip-flops coming in the near future.

After years of work, transgender people were allowed to openly serve in the military.

But Trump’s nominee to replace the openly gay secretary of the Army is quoted as saying last year that being transgender was a “disease.”

If this is a great friend to the LGBT community, I’d hate to see our enemies.

I’d like to pass on the flip-flops this summer.

10 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | NEWS

news The top national and world news you should know from last month

Qsaltlake.com | issue 267 | May 2017

bama Supreme Court decision that had refused to recognize a same-sex parent adoption from another state.

The Nebraska ruling comes as lawmakers began discussions on a bill that could ban workplace discrimination based on an employee’s gender identity or sexual orientation.

US and UN condemn LGBT violence The United States government and the Office of the High Commissioner of Human Rights at the United Nations have denounced LGBT persecution in the Russian-affiliated independent region of Chechnya. They demand Russian and Chechen authorities put an end to the persecution of gay men in the southern Russian republic of Chechnya.

The statement is in response to reports of abductions, unlawful detentions in concentration camps, torture, beatings and killings of men perceived to be gay or bisexual. Russia and Chechen governments deny the charges. A Chechen spokesperson claimed there were no LGBT in the country because, “If a person were that way, their family would put them in a place from which they would never return.”

kicking him repeatedly, then stripped and robbed him in the pre-dawn darkness, according to prosecutors.

The critically injured man walked, naked and without shoes, for about a half mile after the assault for help. He died several hours later but was able to provide investigators information that helped identify his attackers.

A co-defendant, Jayson Woods, will receive prison time. Kevin Tracy and Daniel Henkel, have both plead guilty, were accused of hiding nearby during the attack in case Schneider needed backup.

Minella’s Gest hired hit on Elton Emmys to Asia: You choose Cable network Showtime asked the Emmys how to submit Billions star Asia Kate Dillon, who is the first gender non-binary character on a mainstream television show, for award consideration. The Emmys organization wrote back, “You choose.”

Dillon appeared in Orange is the New Black, identifies as gender non-binary offscreen and uses the pronoun “they” for identification. A Television Academy spokesperson said.

“Asia is free to choose the category they wish to enter.”

Neb. foster ban joins Ala. Miss. in dustbin

Idaho men sentenced in bashing death

The Nebraska Supreme Court upheld a decision to strike down a 1995 ban on same-sex couples becoming foster parents. The court compared the ban to “a sign reading ‘Whites Only’ on the hiring-office door.”

Last year, a federal judge struck down a ban on adoptions by same-sex couples in Mississippi. A few weeks before, the Supreme Court summarily reversed an Ala-

Kelly Schneider, who with three others left an Idaho man to die after stripping him, kicking him with steel-toed boots and stealing his car, has been sentenced to 28 years to life in prison.

Steven Nelson was killed after he responded to an online ad promising a sexual encounter. He was instead attacked by Schneider, who yelled homophobic slurs while

Imadi Handi, the bodyguard of Liza Minella’s late former husband, David Gest, told the Sun newspaper that Gest was so enraged that Sir Elton John publicly questioned his sexual orientation that he hired a hit man for $50,000 to kill the pop star at a concert in California. Sir Elton’s remark “I’d love to buy Liza a heterosexual husband,” sent Gest flying into a rage.

Handi hired the unnamed hit man and had gave him a down payment of $25K . Gest relented and tried to get his money back.

Minelli divorced Gest, her fourth husband, in 2007 and he died in 2016.

42 wants 45 to leave AIDS funds alone Former president George W. Bush in a column for the Washington Post asks the proposed $300 million cut in the $1.1 Billion PEPFAR budget be canceled. The program, initiated in the Bush administration, provides funding for treatment, care and prevention of HIV/AIDS in poorer countries, mostly in Africa and the Caribbean.

Bush writes, “with the resilience of the African people and

the generosity of the American people, nearly 12 million lives have been saved. And nearly 2 million babies have been born HIV-free to infected mothers.”

Digital Test for HIV Researchers from the Spanish National Research Council have developed a biosensor that can detect HIV in someone’s blood as soon as seven days from serio-conversion. It also produces results within five hours of testing. Most HIV tests aren’t able to find the virus in blood until a few weeks after it has entered the body.

Small silicon and gold structures were chemically modified with specific antibodies to trap the p24 protein HIV marker and creates a signal leading to easier detection. The chip may also be used for early detection of some cancers, but, according to researchers, that’s a bit trickier.

West Point stunt goes viral A model and YouTube personality, Max Emerson, attended the West Point Military Academy’s army prom this spring on the arm of his boyfriend, National Guardsman Andrés Camilo.

Emerson also shared a shot of himself in Calvin Klein briefs as he got ready for the event.

The photos went viral after being featured on Yahoo Style, Elite Daily, The Washington Blade and other media outlets.

The publicity stunt comes nearly six years after the repeal of “don’t ask, don’t tell.”

May 2017 | issue 267 | Qsaltlake.com

U.S. mum as Chechnya arrests, beats and kills gay men Russian newspaper, Novaya Gazeta, reported authorities in Chechnya, a semi-autonomous Russian republic in the Caucasus that is predominantly Muslim, have arrested more than 100 men in “connection with their non-traditional sexual orientation, or suspicion of such.”

The newpaper said authorities beat and tortured the men with electric shocks and that at least three of the men later died.

The newspaper earlier reported that gay men have been sent to secret prisons, described as “concentration camps.” The Russian LGBT Network confirmed these reports.

The U.S. State Department said in a statement it is “increasingly concerned about the situation” in Chechnya, but it has not publicly commented on the secret prisons.

U.N. human rights experts on Thursday urged Chechen authorities to release the gay men from custody and called upon the Russian government “to take urgent measures to protect the life, liberty and security of gay and bisexual people in Chechnya and to investigate, prosecute and punish acts of violence motivated by the victim’s sexual orientation.”

British Foreign Minister Boris Johnson and Randy Boissonnault, who advises Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau on LGBT and intersex issues, are among the world leaders who have also condemned Chechen authorities.

No public comments on the gay men ’s arrests have been made by President Trump, Secretary of State Rex Tillerson — who met with Russian President Vladimir Putin and other Kremlin officials in Moscow in April — and U.S. Ambassador to the U.N. Nikki Haley.

“I hope that the current administration lives up to the promises it has made to advance human rights for everyone by raising this issue directly with Russia’s leaders,” former vice president Joe Biden wrote in a statement. “The United States must lead the way to demand an end to these egregious violations of human rights.”

A spokesperson for the Russian government said the arrests are “a question of law enforcement agencies.” A spokesperson for Chechnya’s leader, Ramzan Kadyrov, told a Russian government news agency earlier this month it is “impossible to prosecute those who are not in the republic.”

“If such people existed in Chechnya, law enforcement would not have to worry about them, as their own relatives would have sent them to where they could never return,” said Kadyrov’s spokesperson.

Novaya Gazeta said in a statement that one of Kadyrov’s advisers described its reporters as “enemies of our faith and our homeland” in a speech he delivered at the main mosque in the Chechen capital of Grozny on April 3.

The statement said 15,000 people attended what it described as an “emergency meeting” at the mosque.

The newspaper also noted Chechen media broadcast Kadyrov’s adviser’s remarks and other speeches. The statement also points out the meeting ended with the approval of a resolution that it says will incite violence against its reporters and editors.

“The resolution encourages religious fanatics to violence against journalists,” said Novaya Gazeta. Q

NEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 11

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12 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | NEWS

Qsaltlake.com | issue 267 | May 2017

Stan Penfold will not run for re-election to SLC council Petition calls for review of his director role at Utah AIDS Foundation

Eight is enough for Salt Lake City Councilman Stan Penfold. After two four-year terms, Penfold will not seek re-election.

Penfold became the first openly gay member of the Salt Lake City Council when he was elected in 2009, representing District 3, which covers the Avenues, Capitol Hill and Fairpark neighborhoods.

Last year, Penfold was largely responsible for the naming of Ninth South from 9th West to 11th East “Harvey Milk Boulevard,” after the gay civil rights activist and San Francisco Supervisor who was slain in 1978.

Penfold says he is announcing now in order to give people time to campaign for the seat. The deadline to file for candidacy is June 7. Openly gay attorney and former Utah Pride board member Chris Wharton has already filed for the seat.

Penfold’s term runs through the first week of January.

UTAH AIDS FOUNDATION PETITION A petition asking for a review of his role at the Utah AIDS Foundation as executive director was delivered in late March. Penfold,

Judge grants stay in Equality Utah and NCLR school policy challenge U.S. District Judge Dee Benson granted a stay April 17 in the case brought forward

by Equality Utah and the National Center for Lesbian Rights challenging the constitutionality of state education policies and state laws that prohibited positive depiction of gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender people. The lawsuit claims the restrictions violate free speech and Title IX protections, creating “chilling culture of silence that stigmatizes LGBTQ students.”

The stay effectively puts the case on hold as parties attempt to work out the issues, rendering the case unnecessary.

The Utah Legislature voted overwhelmingly to pass SB196, which reversed a law prohibiting advocacy of homosexuality in health instruction in Utah public schools.

Gov. Gary Herbert signed the bill into law on March 20.

however, said that had nothing to do with his decision not to seek re-election.

The petition sought a number of changes within the organization, including requiring an annual review by the UAF board of trustees, requiring a review of trustees by the board of directors bi-annually, a limitation of the term of the executive director to a maximum of five years, and a staff review.

It also spelled out what would happen if the board determined Penfold was lacking in his performance at the foundation.

Board members received the petition at a board meeting, but have not released a public statement about it.

The petition came after staff member Benjamin Holdaway was let go shortly after a UAF event which had some sexually illicit behavior happening in a tucked-

away part of the venue. Neither Holdaway nor anyone on the board has acknowledged that was the reason for his dismissal.

Holdaway joined former UAF staff member Brian Rogers in penning the petition. Just over 250 people signed it.

Penfold was hired as associate director of UAF in 1995. He was named as executive director in 1999.

NOT PART OF DECISION Penfold said the UAF board of directors and staff have been supportive since he first said he may run for council.

“I’ve never received any hesitation from my board in my role as city council member.”

He also said a “disgruntled employee” had no part in his decision not to run.

MAYBE NOT THE END? A source close to Penfold told QSaltLake that an exploratory committee has been formed to determine if Penfold should run for Salt Lake City mayor. There has been no reply to an email requesting confirmation. Q

Chris Wharton launches campaign for Stan Penfold’s Salt Lake City Council seat Chris Wharton, progressive activist and LGBTQ attorney, announced his candidacy for Salt Lake City Council District 3, after sitting Salt Lake City Councilman Stan Penfold announced he wouldn’t seek re-election this year.

Wharton enters the race with the endorsement of Salt Lake County Council member Arlyn Bradshaw, whose district overlaps many of the same areas.

“Chris is the perfect successor for Stan Penfold,” says Bradshaw. “He will build on Stan’s legacy and represent this district with distinction.”

Wharton announced his top issues for the district as preservation of the unique character of the Avenues, Marmalade, and Capitol Hill neighborhoods; neighborhood safety, including the need for more community policing to prevent property crime; and sustainable use of natural resources and protecting environmental quality.

Wharton first entered politics when former Salt Lake City Mayor Ralph Becker appointed him while he was a law school student, to the Salt Lake City Human Rights Commission. Becker re-appointed him to a second term, when he served as chair of the commission. Salt Lake City’s non-discrimina-

tion ordinance, among the first in the nation, was passed during Wharton’s tenure on the Human Rights Commission.

Wharton also served as the vice-chair of the Utah Pride Center and helped lead a nationwide coalition of LGBTQ organizations to file an amicus brief at the U.S. Supreme Court calling for equal treatment under the law for LGBTQ families. He has also served on Equality Utah’s Legal Panel.

Wharton is a member of the Utah Bar Commission and last year served as president of the Young Lawyers Division of the Utah State Bar. He founded a downtown law firm that has obtained precedent-setting results for its LGBTQ clients.

He also represented several members of the Capitol 13, including Equality Utah executive director Troy Williams.

Wharton is a fourth generation resident of Utah’s capitol city and has deep roots in the greater Avenues neighborhood. He lives in the lower Avenues with his husband.

He earned his Bachelor of Arts degree in history from Westminster College before receiving his Juris Doctor degree from the University of Utah S.J. Quinney College of Law. Q

NEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 13

May 2017 | issue 267 | Qsaltlake.com

Misty Snow to run for Rep. Chris Stewarts’ congressional seat Last year, Misty Snow made national headlines for being the first transgender person in America to win a major party nomination for U.S. Senate and the first to appear on a general election ballot. She has now announced she will be running for Utah’s second congressional seat, currently held by Rep. Chris Stewart. ”My campaign for US Senate was the first time I ever ran for office Misty Snow / BRI BERGMAN and I learned so much from that campaign,” Snow said in a statement. “I am starting this campaign much earlier in the process than my last one because I want more time to connect with voters, to build and train my team, and to fundraise.”

Snow cites the close election April 11 for the 4th congressional district in Kansas in a traditionally conservative district.

“While the Democrat didn’t win, they came very close in an election that should not have been close at all,” Snow said. “I see this a being a taste of things to come.

If the president remains as unpopular as he is today it will be very possible for a Democrat who has good name recognition and can turn out voters to get elected in Utah’s 2nd district and that is exactly what I intend to do.”

Snow is a Utah native who works as a grocery cashier. She sees her working class background as being an advantage that allows her to connect with average people; allowing her to understand their needs.

In a statement, Snow said she plans to take what she learned in the U.S. Senate race last year and apply it to this race.

“Over the last few months we have seen our government show nothing but hostility towards people of color and the

LGBT community; while, at the same time, eviscerating programs and protections that help women, working people, and the poor,” she wrote. “I cannot stand idly by while our government turns it’s back on it’s citizens. I want a government that truly represents people instead of one that represses people. I want a government that protects the rights of working people, of women, of people of color, of the LGBT community, and the rights of sovereign Native tribes. I am running for a congress because I want to be a representative who truly represents you, I want to be one who will fight for those who cannot fight, and be a voice for those who are voiceless.”

“Last year was a presidential election year and the Democratic candidate for Utah’s 2nd district received 93,760 votes.

Two years earlier, during a midterm election, the Republican incumbent received 88,915 votes. That means that if people show up, we can win that race,” she wrote.

Utah’s Congressional District 2 is largely made up of southwestern Utah, part of Davis County and the north half of Salt Lake County. Q Snow has set up a donation page at secure.actblue.com/ contribute/page/mistysnow

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Park City High School Gay-Straight Alliance raises money for homeless youth Park City High School Gay-Straight Alliance students wanted to help LGBT teens who were less fortunate than they, since Park City is largley a welcoming community.

Once again they were out at the Sundance Film Festival, this year raising $3,200 for the Volunteers of America Homeless Youth Resource Center in Salt Lake City. Many LGBT teens, they say, end up on the streets when their families reject them.

“A large proportion of the homeless youth everywhere, but especially in Utah, is LGBT, so we thought it would be a good thing that would contribute to our cause (as a club) but also help other communities,” said Jayda Robinson, a GSA member. “Park City is pretty accepting, but in Salt Lake it’s worse than here. So we wanted to give back to those people.”

The students held a bake saleand found filmgoers eager to pitch in when they saw the club’s rainbow flag and learned about where the money was headed.

They say the spirit of the Women’s March on Park City’s Main St. drew a new kind of activism since the election of President Trump, whose administration has rolled back Obama-era protections for transgender students in public schools.

“We got multiple people who were like, ‘Hey, because of the recent things with politics, here’s $20,’” said Alicia Whitty, another member of the club. “It made me really happy. Like, I was talking to my friends and it was like, ‘People are doing this. For us.’ I hadn’t really had an experience with raising money for anything else, and I didn’t realize what it would be like. I volunteered an excessive amount of times, almost seven times, even though we were only required to do two because it made me really happy.”

One of the most inspiring parts of the donation drive, they said, was hearing the stories of people moved by the club’s efforts. Some talked of their own experiences of coming out as LGBT, and others described their personal journeys of growing up with negative views of LGBT people, then eventually becoming supportive of gay and transgender rights. Q

Qsaltlake.com | issue 267 | May 2017

Police seek help as gay man is found dead in car in South Salt Lake Easter Sunday A gay South Jordan man was found shot to death in his car Easter Sunday in South Salt Lake. Police are seeking information from anyone who may have been in the area.

Matthew Holt, 46, was found in his black Mazda dead with a gunshot wound at about 3200 South and 9th West, Matthew Holt according to South Salt Lake police detective Gary Keller. Police believe he was shot between 11 a.m. and 2 p.m. and that it was not a self-inflicted injury. Police arrived at 2:45 p.m.

James Madison Park, on 3300 South and

the Jordan River at about 1200 West, has long been a place where men seek sexual liaisons, which are moved to area parking lots. While police won’t say whether they are investigating a connection to that location, close friends say it is possible Holt was there cruising.

Friends also say he was a funny and caring person. He worked at Wax Me Too Salon.

“Last night Wax Me Too lost our most special person. We are all devastated and in shock at the loss of Matt Holt,” a staffer wrote on the business’ Facebook page. “He was our friend, our confidant, our jokester, ... he was our family.”

“Matt Holt was such a kind, gentle man. I can’t even comprehend this. Matt was truly loved by everyone he met, and genuinely interested in people and how he could help them,” Amy Birkner wrote on his Facebook wall.

South Salt Lake police request anyone with information call their dispatch at 801-840-4000. Q

Paul Mero says conservatives ‘stand down’ on LGBT rights in religious freedom fight A strategic retreat is being proposed to the opponents of LGBT civil rights, “We cannot afford to keep doing what hasn’t worked and isn’t right,” Paul Mero wrote in an op-ed in The Salt Lake Tribune.

Mero was president of the Sutherland Institute and a familiar voice advocating against legislation supporting LGBT rights.

He now manages PTM Strategies, a Utah consulting company. He was a coordinator of the Second World Congress of Families and author of The Natural Family: A Manifesto, The Natural Family: Bulwark of Liberty and Civil rights and sexual behavior: an analysis of the Employment Non-Discrimination Act Insight for the Family Research Council of America.

The retreat is to facilitate defending Religious Freedom, writing.

“Religious freedom needs to be defended on its own merits, not on the backs of its perceived enemies.” He calls upon his allies whom he says “cherish” religious freedom to stop opposing gender equality with no trade-offs or compromises.

He calls the strategy not a surrender but neutrality and wisdom.

He writes that standing down on LGBTQ rights are the only way to effectively defend religious freedom. “Perhaps there are a dozen reasons to oppose transgender bathrooms, but not one of those reasons should have anything to do with religious freedom.”

Advocates should “render unto Caesar” and get out of public policy negotiations and litigation. He prescribes that religion should teach its adherents “correct principles and leave them to govern themselves.”

He advises to stand down on LGBT issues and, “Neither support them nor oppose them. Whether they gain support or not will be left to the LGBT community and their efforts.”

Assuming religious freedom is very fragile he suggests, “Our policy eye should be single, to defending religious freedom.

Unless LGBT issues infringe directly on religious freedom, we should stand down” Seeing opposition as “enemies’ he writes, “Live your faith, love your enemy and no viable grounds will rise to challenge individual religious freedom.” Q

NEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 15

May 2017 | issue 267 | Qsaltlake.com

Analysis: Mormons’ reactions to LGBT video reveal the LDS Church’s mixed messages about gays

BY EMJEN

In March, the Mormon Channel, an official video blog of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, released a new video to Mormonandgay. lds.org: “The Mackintoshes’ Story — A Son Comes Out and a Family Loves.”

While this family’s story exemplifies how Mormon families often react in love to gay loved ones who come Xian Mackintosh out, leave the church, and have romantic partners, Mormons’ diverse reactions to this video reveal tensions in LDS attitudes — not just toward homosexuality, but also toward religious authority and change. The resulting confusion can tell us a lot about the mixed messages the church is sending to members.

Some of the first reactions were gratitude, relief, and surprise. One commenter remarked, “This is so refreshing. It’s even put out by the church I believe.” And another said, “I was so surprised when I saw the church’s logo at the end!”

Other reactions were along the lines of “this could have been my story”: “The day I asked my son for his forgiveness for how I had been treating him was the day my heart was healed! I could feel the love of the Saviour enter my soul and all other feelings of pain and anxiety melt away!”

“This is wonderful! [My] father was a

gay man. We can ‘defend the plan’ and still love everyone no matter what!!”

“Thank you. We have almost the exact situation, and have reacted in the same ways.”

But another set of reactions showed an element of outright confusion that this could be church teaching. A Deseret News commenter called “Overdubbed” summarizes: “I can’t put my finger on it. No one thing about it. But this video bugs me. I think, perhaps, it is trying to make some sort of statement about families must love and support their members. But maybe that message is drowning in lots of other included messages that seem to be promoting apostasy.”

On Facebook, a commenter wonders “(H)as the church changed their stance on homosexuality being a abomination?”

We even already have a full blog post decrying the video as opposite to what the church teaches: “Indeed, in the end the parents do accept homosexuality—as their son’s immutable identity! How cruel is that! These are people who know better (see the Family Proclamation) [than] pretending a despicable, age-old sin is somehow a young person’s identity.”

And finally, one commenter just cryptically said, “I’m out.” Out of the closet?

Out of the church? Out of this discussion becauses it’s complicated and contentious?

So why would the LDS Church’s message about lovingly accepting a gay son cause confusion?

One answer might be the abundance of lessons and talks related to the 1995 statement “The Family: A Proclamation to the World.” This has been cited as the church’s stand on homosexuality and describes how only a one-man, one-woman-led family is

PICTURE YOURSELF IN A

acceptable to God as a marriage form.

Mormon leaders have denounced gay marriage repeatedly as it has become more acceptable in the wider world. Even in the upcoming April 2017 Ensign, there is an article by Elder Larry Lawrence where he describes gay marriage as “only a counterfeit.

It brings neither posterity nor exaltation.”

Another might be that the last time a church leader talked directly and publicly about the question of welcoming children who are actively gay into their home was in 2006. In an interview Elder Dallin Oaks answered a Public Affairs question about this scenario: “I can also imagine some circumstances in which it might be possible to say, ‘Yes, come, but don’t expect to stay overnight.

Don’t expect to be a lengthy house guest.

Don’t expect us to take you out and introduce you to our friends, or to deal with you in a public situation that would imply our approval of your “partnership.’”

Finally, the biggest critique of the video is that there is no allusion to the November 2015 policy update to Handbook 1, which names those who enter into samesex marriage as apostates and requires them to have a disciplinary council. As one tweeter snarked in response to the video: “If your child comes out as gay, it is important that you love them. They will especially need this love when we excommunicate them.” @FakeLDSNewsroom While the video itself is a positive step forward, it will take more clarifications like it from church leadership to help members understand ways to be more Christ-like with this issue.

The message that the Mackintoshes send that “At the end of the day, we are family” is vitally important for the church that celebrates “Families Are Forever.”Q The video is available at bit.ly/MackLDS

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16 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | QMMUNITY

Qmmunity OUR COMMUNITY’S BRIEFS

Alt Garden Club to hear about Spring City Alan Barnett will discuss the historic architecture of Spring City, Utah, at the Alternative Garden Club’s monthly meeting, May 3. His talk is in preparation for the Club’s home and garden tour of Utah’s “Art City later in the month. The tour is always a lot of fun, but Alan’s extensive knowledge of the history and local building traditions of this pioneer Mormon settlement make it even more meaningful.

The meeting is Wednesday, May 3 at 7:30 PM in the Sugar House Garden Center, 1602 E 2100 S, and Salt Lake City.

The club, founded for and by LGBT community members and their friends and allies, opens the meetings to any interested gardener. Membership is $20 per year. For more information, contact altgardenclub@ gmail.com, utahagc.org/clubs/altgardenclub or their Facebook page at bit.ly/ altgarden.

Red Butte Garden’s 38th Annual Plant Sale A Spring favorite, the Red Butte Annual Plant sale is slated for members Friday, May 12 from 1 to 8 p.m. and for the general public Saturday, May 13, 9 a.m. to 3 p.m. Support the Garden and enjoy an impressive selection of herbs, specialty annuals, vegetables, sun and shade perennials, ornamental grasses, shrubs, conifers, roses, vines, trees, and the best selection of heirloom vegetables, native plants and water-wise plants. There will be experts on-hand, Garden staff and volunteers, to give qualified help to answer plant and gardening questions.

Enter through the amphitheater gates from the four-way stop sign at Chipeta and Wakara Ways, turn left (or North) and follow the signs. Enter through the north-facing gate used for general admission during concerts.

Arts Festival Seeking Volunteers The sign-up to become a volunteer at the 2017 Utah Arts Festival, June 22-25 has begun. Help out for a shift or two receive volunteer swag which includes a FREE shirt and ticket. Ages 14 and older are

Qsaltlake.com | issue 267 | May 2017

eligible to volunteer. Learn more about volunteering at www.uaf. org. #UnitedInArt. #artliveshere

Utah Gay Fathers sharing members’ stories The parenting support group Utah Gay Fathers is sharing stories from their members about the “struggles and triumphs in being both gay and a father.”

“Each of our paths are unique, yet there are similarities. You are not alone nor the first to stare down a path you weren’t sure would lead to happiness,” wrote group leader Ben Visser. “Our guest blogs are their own experiences and opinions. What is right for me may not be right for you.

Only you can and should choose what works for you.

The blog will be available at utahgayfathers.org/opendoors/

Equality Utah presents QTalks Activist group Equality Utah will present QTalks, what they call an “engaging, fastpaced one hour lecture with four people teaching four 15-minute segments on topics related to Utah’s LGBTQ community.”

April’s talk will include: Liz Owens on “Your Body Your Choice: LGBTQ Reproductive Justice;” Lucas Fowler: “Why I am a Trans Activist;” Clifford Rosky: “Teaching Homosexuality? The Campaign to Eliminate Anti-Gay Curriculum Laws;” and Connell O’Donovan: “Queer Nation Utah.”

The event is free and open to the public and is ADA accessible on Wednesday, April 26 from 7–8 p.m. at the Salt Lake City Main Library, 210 E 400 South.

PFLAG-SLC to present ‘Gender Revolution’ The Salt Lake City PFLAG Chapter will be hosting a screening of National Geographic’s Gender Revolution: A Journey with Katie Couric on Monday, May 8 at the Salt Lake City Main Library Auditorium. The show starts at 6:30 p.m.

“The topic of gender is greatly misunderstood in today’s complex society. This video hosted by Katie Couric and produced by National Geographic explores the complex issues of sex at birth, gender, gender identity and expression. What does it mean to be male, female, transgender, gender non-conforming/non-binary?” wrote organizers.

Utah Bears gearing up for Jam-Bear-ee After this long cold winter, Utah Bears is is planning its annual Summer habitat event in McCammon, Idaho. The newly-named Jam-Bear-ee campout is scheduled for July 20–23. Registration will open June 1 and run through July 15. Registration costs include catered meals like only a bears organization can muster.

Fees are $85 for members and $105 for nonmembers if bought before June 23.

More information at utahbears.com.

Q Kickball and Pride Softball Summer sports are starting very soon. Q Kickball will start its season April 30, and Pride Softball League, now in its 23rd year, will start May 7.

Games are held on Sundays at Sunnyside Park. Kickball starts at 10 and 11 a.m. and Softball starts at 10 a.m. with spectators welcome.

Information through aaron.smith@ aggiemail.usu.edu

Pygmalion’s ‘Silent Sky’ at the Rose Pygmalion Theatre Company’s season continues with “Silent Sky” by Lauren Gunderson, directed by Mark Fossen, which plays April 28 through May 13. The show features Brenda Hattingh, Hannah Minshew, Elizabeth Golden, Michael Scott Johnson and Teresa Sanderson “Silent Sky,” tells the true story of 19th century astronomer Henrietta Leavitt, which plays out against a landscape of fierce sisterly love, early feminism, universe-revealing science, and a time when humans were called “computers.”

Performances of “Silent Sky” are April 28 through May 13. Thursday, Friday and Saturday performances begin at 7:30 p.m., Sunday at 2 p.m. with an extra matinee May 13 at 2 p.m. at Rose Wagner Performing Arts Center, Black Box Theatre, 138 W. 300 South. Tickets: $15–20 from 801-355.

ARTS (2787) or Artsaltlake.org

SPORTS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 17

May 2017 | issue 267 | Qsaltlake.com

outfield LGBT sports movement faces growing pains

BY DAN WOOG

Once upon a time, there was no such thing as LGBT sports. No one imagined gay men could be athletes. Besides, weren’t all female athletes lesbians? Or so the stereotypes went.

Then came Dave Kopay, Greg Louganis. The growth of women’s sports. With a rush, LGBT sports roared out of the locker room.

The next step was to gather LGBT athletes together. Outsports created a superb online community. In real time there were running clubs, gay sports teams, even entire leagues.

All of that happened organically. But, as with all growing movements, formal organizations emerge to advocate, educate and show a cohesive face to the world.

Up they sprang: the You Can Play Project. Changing the Game. Br{ache the Silence. Athlete Ally.

Several years ago, Outsports founder Cyd Zeigler wanted to unify all the groups and individuals working in the LGBT sports space. With longtime activists Pat Griffin and Helen Carroll, they organized a summit meeting. Nike offered space and sponsorship dollars.

The first meeting was wildly successful. A diverse group brought enormous energy and great ideas to Portland. They concluded a weekend filled with discus-

sions and social events by marching in the city’s gay pride parade.

“The whole idea was collaboration,” Griffin recalls. “Instead of competing head to head for funding and publicity, we wanted to pull individuals and organizations together.” Nike was happy for the help; they needed a way to allocate their funding. The LGBT Sports Coalition would be it.

The new group’s emphasis on collaboration was important. All projects submitted through them for Nike funding had to involve more than one group. One of the most important efforts was Common Ground, bringing together LGBT sports educators and administrators with members of the faith community.

Other groups tackled transgender issues through state high school athletic associations. Campus Pride took the lead in working with historically black colleges and universities.

Annual Coalition meetings in Portland were energizing, exciting and fun. Relationships between member organizations and individuals grew. Young attendees found inspiration. Mentorships formed.

However, the LGBT Sports Coalition lacked 501(c)(3) status. Money was funneled through the Ben Cohen StandUp Foundation. Nike pushed for the Coalition to have its own standalone non-profit status.

At the same time, Nike was going through an internal review of its funding processes, channeling some resources elsewhere.

IN WEST WENDOVER MAY 12–14 WENDOVERSOFTBALL.COM/LGBTQ

There were other tensions at the LGBT Sports Foundation (the Coalitions’ new name). One involved the role of straight allies in LGBT sports. There were raw discussions regarding the role of Athlete Ally, with Coalition members taking both sides of the debate.

Another division emerged around the issue of diversity. Voices asked for greater numbers — and power — for people of color, women and transgender people.

Leaders invited members of those groups to join.

Some white men applauded the move.

Some felt attacked. An ugly split ensued.

“Treating intersectionality as part of a coalition is how to get things done,” Griffin says. “I understand that other people might have a very different view.”

Yet another fissure appeared. Some Foundation members believed that the most effective way to achieve change is for all LGBT people in sports to come out. Others felt that – while coming out is important — it could not be the only approach.

“I think we need advocacy, education and policy change,” Griffin says. She prefers a holistic approach involving straight coaches and administrators, including seminars, policy manuals and other efforts.

Several members left the LGBT Sports Foundation. Griffin and Jeff Sheng — creator of the “Fearless” photographic project, and a leading voice for intersec—Continued on page 37

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18 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | NEWS

A PREVIEW TO

Qsaltlake.com | issue 267 | May 2017

Big Freedia to headline Utah Pride Big Freedia (pronounced “FREE-da”), known as the Queen of Bounce, was announced as the headliner of the 2017 Utah Pride Festival, a fundraiser for the services of the Utah Pride Center.

Big Freedia is at the forefront of the Bounce rap movement (a subgenre of hip-hop born out of New Orleans and known for its call and response style and lightening speed booty-shaking dance). Performing five out of seven nights in any given week with dancers she calls The Divas, Big Freedia’s show is nothing short of dazzling.

Gay and proud, Big Freedia asserts that her (Freedia is a he but uses the feminine pronoun for her stage persona) sexuality has little to do with her music. “All types of people — gay, straight, rich, poor, black, white — come to my shows. People just wanna get out and shake their azzzz and have a good time!”

Raised on Josephine Street in uptown New Orleans, Big Freedia, born Freddie Ross, was raised by his mother, a hairdresser, and stepfather, a truck driver for Coca-Cola. When Freddie was 15, the family moved to a more upscale neighborhood in New Orleans. Freddie —along with his brother Adam and sister Crystal Ross — were immersed in music at home by their mother, who often sang along to her Gladys Knight and Patty LaBelle records around the house. But it was the Baptist church choir where a young Freddie flourished. ”My mother made sure I never missed practice,” recalls Freedia. By the time he was 18, Freedia moved from member to director of the choir.

She is now starting her sixth season of Big Freedia Bounces Back on the Fuse network.

May 2017 | issue 267 | Qsaltlake.com

Utah Pride Festival is now a Pride Week, as activities go on from Wednesday through Sunday, May 31 through June 4 at Washington and Library Squares in downtoen Salt Lake City.

Tickets Single-day tickets are $5 for Friday and $8 for Saturday and Sunday if purchased in advance at utahpridecenter.org/festival/ or $7 and $10 at the gate. New this year is a “squad pass,” where people can get five tickets for the price of three.

Senior and youth are now eligible for reduced-priced tickets for Saturday and Sunday at the festival. Seniors will pay $5 and youth 13–18 are $4.

Also new this year is a VIP-level “Pride Elevated Pass,” which includes a Festival Weekend Pass w/VIP fast lane entry, entry to the Main Stage Garden and private patios at the Redrock Stage and DJ/Dance Stage, private patio exclusive drink and complimentary food service, VIP Parade seating and a Festival 2017 souvenir water bottle. The Pride Elevated Pass will be $60 online and $75 at the gate.

Pride Spectacular WEDNESDAY MAY 31, 6–9:30PM MARRIOTT CITY CREEK

This year’s kick-off party will be held Wednesday, May 31 at the Marriott City Creek. Tickets for the gala event will go on sale April 1

Youth Pride Dance THURSDAY JUNE 1, 7–11:00PM PRIDE FESTIVAL GROUNDS

Another first is a youth dance on Thursday night on the Festival grounds. Tickets available at the door $5. Enter at 300 E 500 S

Pride Interfaith Service THURSDAY JUNE 1, 7–10:00PM FIRST UNITED METHODIST CHURCH 203 E 200 S

The Pride Interfaith remains on Thursday and this year will be held at the First United Methodist Church.

NEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 19

Pride March and Rally FRIDAY JUNE 2, 2017 6–7PM 900 E HARVEY MILK BLVD (900 S) TO SOUTH FESTIVAL ENTRANCE

A large turnout is expected at the Pride Marches this year, if recent marches like the Women’s March are any indication. It will start at the 9th and Harvey Milk Boulevard area and make its way to the festival grounds.

Those who participate in the march will be allowed onto the Festival grounds free of charge on Friday.

Utah Pride Festival OPENING FRIDAY JUNE 2, 7:–11PM PRIDE FESTIVAL GROUNDS

The festival will be three days on the grounds of Washington and Library Squares. Hours will be Friday June 2, 5–11pm, Saturday June 3, noon–11pm, and Sunday June 4, 11am–7pm

Outdoor Proud 5K and Health Day SATURDAY JUNE 3 8–11AM PEACE GARDENS, 1060 S 900 W

The 5K run has been moved back to Saturday morning with other health-related events will also take place that morning.

Pride Speakers and Films SATURDAY & SUNDAY SLC PUBLIC LIBRARY — MAIN

Utah Pride Parade SUNDAY 10AM-NOON 200 S WEST TEMPLE TO 400 EAST

Third Friday

The parade route and time is the same as last year, beginning at 10am on the corner of Second South and West Temple, heading east to Fourth East. Those wishing to participate should sign up immediately, because the city limits the length of the parade and spots are quickly filling up. Go to utahpridecenter. org/festival/participate.

More information can be found at utahpridecenter.org/festival

7pm, Third Friday of the Month Matrons First Baptist Church of Mayhem 777 S 1300 East

20 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | PRIDES

Qsaltlake.com | issue 267 | May 2017

June 24

Flagstaff: Pride in the Pines Flagstaff, Ariz. flagstaffpride.org The “Pride in the Pines” Festival June 24th 2017 at the Thorpe Park Ball Fields. Celebrating 21 yearsand featuring Lisa Lisa on the main stage Saturday: 12-9pm June 22–24

Pocatello LGBT Pride

2017 Local Prides and LGBT events

Prides in states touching Utah are in cyan. Utah prides are in magenta. Dates are the first day, and some go for several days and even weeks.

May 31 –June 4

Utah Pride

Salt Lake City, UT utahpridecenter.org

See our coverage on the previous page for full details June 8–10

Casper Pride Weekend

Casper, Wyo. fb.me/CasperPrideWeekend Casper Pride Weekend starts off with a film festival on Thursday, June 9.

A hoe-down dance is planned that Friday. The annual picnic is Saturday at Crossroads Park with free food, live music, performers, face painting, games, and free Rapid HIV testing.

Saturday night is a drag show at Backwards Distillery and music is planned on Sunday. Hosted by Casper PFLAG. June 9–12

Albuquerque Pridefest

Albuquerque, N.M. abqpride.com/ The 41st annual Albuquerque PrideFest celebrating the LGBTIQ community in New Mexico starts Friday night, June 9, to get the community together. On Saturday is the Albuquerque Pride Parade starting at 10 a.m., followed by the main event at Expo NM with dance, music, expression, art, fun and diversity.

This annual event averages about 9,000 people mostly from all over the Southwest.

June 10

Cheyenne Pride in the Park Cheyenne, Wyo. wyomingequality.org/events/

On Saturday, June 10 from noon to 3 p.m. is a free barbecue that kicks off Cheyenne Pride festivities. They’ll have hot dogs and hamburgers and sides, music and games at the Lions Park Gazebo, located on the beach of Sloan Lake, 4603 Lions Park Dr. A Pride March is planned in the morning and a dance at the Plains Hotel in the evening.

June 10

Jackson Hole Teton Pride

Jackson Hole, Wyo. facebook.com/JacksonPFLAG and wyomingequality.org/events Teton Pride is an annual Jackson PFLAG potluck picnic at Phil Baux Park on Saturday, June 10. 3:30–6 p.m.

They are also considering a parade from the Town Square to Phil Baux Park just before the start of the picnic.

June 16–18

Bisbee Pride

Bisbee, Ariz. bisbeepride.com Bisbee Pride will present a Pride Village in Grassy Park all weekend.

Friday night is a lingerie pub crawl, Lascivious Lingerie Pageant and the Midnight Miners and Madames Street Dance. On Saturday, there will be cocktails at the Pride Village and entertainment from 10 a.m. — 5 p.m., a wine tasting, live theater. A live performance of “Are You Married?” with Robin Taylor follows. At 5 p.m. is the Bisbee Pride Parade — Celebrating Diversity, then the “LOL - Laugh Out Loud” live comedy show hosted

by Dana Goldberg with Sampson McCormick and the Pubes. Live bands will play at the dance party that night.

On Sunday is Twisted Sister bingo at 11 a.m.

June 16–17

Boise Pride

Boise, Idaho boisepridefest.org This year, the Boise Pridefest will be hosting its first 2-day festival with a mix of local entertainment national headline acts, incliding Ty Herndon,

Frenchie Davis, Sam Tolson, Jason CoZmo, Erika Gaga, Rebecca Scott, Blaze & Kelly, Trist Fishman, Minerva Jayne, Poison Waters, and Spyke Naugahyde. Friday runs from 6 to 9 p.m and Saturday from noon to 3:30 p.m. at Capitol Park June 17–18

Denver Pridefest

Denver, Colo. glbtcolorado.org/pridefest This 2-day festival is at Civic Center Park in downtown Denver with a center stage, a Latino stage and Smirnoff DanceWorld. Headliners include Jennifer Holliday, Chad Michaels, Peppermint, and A.B. Soto. DJ Dave Audé will run the dance stage. The Big Gay 5K will take place at 10:00 am Saturday June 17th. The race will start and end in Civic Center Park. The PrideFest Parade goes from Cheesman Park to Civic Center via Colfax Avenue Sunday, June 18 starting at 9:30 a.m.

June 17

Elko Pride

Elko, Nev. facebook.com/elkopride June 21–25

Durango Pride

Durango, Colo. durangopride.org Durango Pride Festival begins Wednesday, June 21 with a movie night at Animas City Theater. Thursday is a cocktail reception Rochester with Big Mama Donna and comedy night. Friday morning is mountain biking at Horseshoe Gulch and that night a black light glow dance at ATC with Imaginario Circus and a performance at Derailed. Saturday at noon is a Pride procession on Main Ave, followed by the Pride Festival in Buckley Park trhough 6 p.m. At 9 p.m. will be a drag show at ATC with a RuPaul’s Drag Race queen followed by dancing. Also at 9 p.m. is karaoke at 8th Ave Tavern and entertainment at Derailed Sunday brings bloody Marys and bingo at Plate and the Animas River Parade with Mild to Wild Rafting

Pocatello ID pocatellopride.org Pocatello Pride returns with keynote speakers, entertainment, awards, food and bar. See the site for details.

June 24

Wyoming SuperDay ’17

Cheyenne, Wyo. wyomingequality.org/events/ The 35th annual HollyFrontier Superday is a yearly tradition to support equality and non-discrimination in the Equality State. This year it is on Saturday, June 24, from 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. with rides, refreshments, live music, demonstrations, games, contests, exhibits and an arts and crafts show. Also, several sporting events, including a HollyFrontier 5K/10K Run/Walk, the Jackson’s All-American Grill Volleyball Tournament, the HollyFrontier Tour de Prairie Cycling Adventure and a Show & Shine Car Show, not to mention a Special Friends Duck Derby. Lions Park Gazebo, 4603 Lions Park Dr. July 8–9

Colo. Springs PrideFest

Colorado Springs, Colo. coloradospringspridefest.com PrideFest takes place July 8th and 9th in America the Beautiful Park.

Saturday is Family Day with activities for kids of all ages and shows on two stages. Sunday, the parade starts at 11 am at Cimarron and Tejon, marching North to Colorado Avenue and then West to the park to enjoy the PrideFest picnic.

July 10–17

Four Corners Regional Campout

McPhee Reservoir, Colo. campout.moonfruit.com In its 23rd year at a secluded campground near Dolores, Colo., the LGBTQ community comes to the lake and around the bonfire. July 10th officially kicks off the full week of fun in the sun on McPhee Reservoir.

The weather last year was beautiful and 100 campers from all four states of the four corners and beyond attended. Pitch a tent or bring an RV. This year’s theme is Wet and Wild.

May 2017 | issue 267 | Qsaltlake.com

July 21–22

Sep 9

Deming, N.M. demingpride.org In its fifth year, Deming Pride begins Friday July 21 with a meet and greet and sponsor party at Starmaxx Margaritas Restaurant and Lounge from 8:00 to midnight, with drink specials and pride entertainment. On Saturday the showtime starts at 8 p.m. with Jordan Mathews, Kristi Waters, Jessica Michaels, Vivika d’Angelo Steele, and Glittery Caliente.

July 22

St George, Utah bit.ly/stgeorgepride17

Deming Pride

Reno Pride

Reno, Nev. northernnevadapride.org Northern Nevada Pride CommUNITY Pride Parade, March, and Festival will be on Saturday, July 22 in Reno, Nev. The parade will leave California Ave. at Hill St. at 11 a.m. and take Arlington Ave to Wingfield Park for the Festival.

Aug 5

Ogden Pride

Ogden, Utah ogdenpride.org The 3rd annual Ogden Pride Festival will be held on Aug. 5 again at the Ogden Amphitheater on the grounds of City Hall. With the theme “Rise Together with Pride,” the free event will go from 1 to 8 p.m. with booths, food and a stage full of entertainment.

Aug 16–20

Wyoming Equality Rendezvous

Laramie, Wyo. rendezvouswyoming.org Rendezvous is a 5-day campout in the Medicine Bow National Forest, between Laramie and Cheyenne Wyo. that provides a friendly, safe, LGBT affirming environment for everyone, from everywhere. Pitch a tent, bring an RV and join us for 5-days of making new friends while celebrating Pride — Wyoming Style. Activities include games, live entertainment, dancing, ATV trails (bring your own), socializing, karaoke and more.

Rendezvous is the Rocky Mountain Region’s largest LGBT Pride Camping Event. Breakfast, lunch and dinner is available for purchase each day. Friday brings drag queen bingo and comedian Jessica Kirson. Saturday brings a festival, beer bust, Rendezvous Olympics, and a concert by “All Anerican Boy” Steve Grand. On Monday, the 21st a total eclipse of the sun will be visible from Wheatland, about 90 minutes north of the camp.

St George Pride

St. George Pride will take place from 2 to 10 p.m. at Vernon Worthen Park, 300 S 400 E, St. George. Details are still takong shape, so watch the Facebook page.

PRIDES | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 21

CREATIVELY INSPIRED

LODGING in the heart of Moab, Utah

September 15–17

Santa Fe Pride Santa Fe, N.M. santafehra.org

Friday evening, September 15 will be the Santa Fe Pride Parade starting at the state Capitol and running north along Old Santa Fe Trail to the Plaza and north along Lincoln Ave to Federal Place. Satruday is the festival in Fort Marcy Park Sep 28–30

Idaho Falls Pride Idaho Falls, Idaho idahofallspride.org Taking place at the Shiloh Inn and Convention Center, 780 Lindsay Blvd, Idaho Falls Pride will kick off Thursday night with Comedy Night, followed Friday by a Pride Drag and Comedy Show and Pageant. The Idaho Falls Pride Parade starts at 10:30 a.m. at the Unitarian Universalist Church, 555 E St and travels to the Shilo Inn. Pride is a party on the back patio of the Shilo Inn with vendors, kid’s games, music and drinks and food available from Keefer’s Island Restaurant.

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Sep 28–Oct. 1

Moab Pride

Moab, Utah moabpride.org Moab Pride starts off with Gay Adventure Week with Jeep safaris, river running, hikes and other outdoor events that make Moab what it is. Evening events will take place Thursday through Saturday, with the Visibility March happening Saturday morning, ending up at the festival.

Details still forthcoming. Watch the site and Facebook page.

Oct 19–21

Las Vegas Pride Las Vegas, Nev. lasvegaspride.org Events including the annual Las Vegas Pride Night Parade on Oct. 20, and Las Vegas Pride Family Festival on October 21–22. Details still forthcoming.

Adult Learn to Swim program

promoted and funded by the US Masters Swimming and Swimming Saves Lives Foundation.

Six-week program offered at Fairmont Aquatics Center, 1044 Sugarmont Dr.

Sign up today: quacquac.org/adult-learn-to-swim.html USMS Team. Adult Learn to Swim Tues & Thurs 7–8p, Sun 11a–12p Drop-ins welcome (say QUAC)!

QUAC day admission $5, $30/mo.

22 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | VIEWS

views

Qsaltlake.com | issue 267 | May 2017

quotes “People who live in the mainstream and the status quo think that everyone else is there to serve them. They think: ‘Oh, you must be here to make me look good.

That’s what gay guys are right? You’re an accessory for my straight life ... They’re tourists. It’s not really saying: ‘You are fierce and I’m going to respect you for who you are.’ They [the gay men] are there as a party clown.”

—RuPaul on straight women and bachelorette parties at gay bars on The Dinner Party Download podcast

“Why haven’t you told anyone you are transgender? ... There is deception here, Deception on levels, [producer] Jeff, that these guys don’t even understand.”

—Gay contestant, Jeff Garner, to trans contestant Zeke Smith to save himself from elimination in Survivor

“I think [younger LGBTQ people] think that the big struggle was getting gay marriage passed. Young people growing up right now see Zachary Quinto or Neil Patrick Harris in major motion pictures or on television, and think it’s always been this good. I think they have no idea how we would be arrested in the streets, and kept from ever feeling normal.”

—Harvey Fierstein, talking to The Hollywood Reporter

VIEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 23

May 2017 | issue 267 | Qsaltlake.com

who’s your daddy

Cupcake Warrior

BY CHRISTOPHER KATIS

When I

was a kid, my best friend’s sister had an EasyBake Oven. We thought it was the coolest item ever.

Although she did get the little cake mix packages for Christmas and on her birthday, mostly she made us apples sprinkled with cinnamon.

A few years ago, 13-year old McKenna Pope started an online petition demanding that Hasbro, the makers of the light bulb-powered appliance, offer the ovens in more “boy friendly” colors. It happened that her 4-year old brother, Gavyn, wanted one of the ovens, but refused to play with anything pink — a color he associated with being for girls.

Well, 40,000 signatures later, Hasbro hit public relations pay dirt, and introduced new colors and packaging featuring both genders. Suddenly, a seemingly dated toy became popular again overnight.

Niko has always loved helping in the kitchen, so we shouldn’t have been surprised to learn that he was one of those boys who asked for an oven. Now, Kelly and I don’t have any hang ups about the “gender” of our kids’ toys, so naturally for Christmas that year he became the ecstatic owner of an Easy-Bake.

Being the loving fathers we are, we’ve suffered through some pretty atrocious culinary experiments baked by a light bulb. And in fairness, we’ve also nibbled on some pretty darn good treats, too.

While other kids his age are

watching cartoons or sports on TV, Niko is viewing cooking shows. The other night he was watching Cupcake Wars: Kids. I wasn’t paying much attention to the program, until I heard him advise the girl on the screen, “Who the hell wants a curry cupcake?” I agreed with him but told him to watch his mouth.

I should have known he was learning a thing or two about the culinary arts when we explained to me what fondant is. (For those of you not lucky enough to have a 10-year-old kitchen whiz kid — it’s that weird rubbery icing that people use to make confections pretty.)

Let’s be clear: cooking isn’t exactly a love for musical theater or an obsession with Barbra Streisand, but it’s also not living and breathing football either. When I was a kid, cooking wasn’t something most guys admitted to enjoying.

Now, I’m not saying that having two dads is an advantage for a kid that loves to watch reruns of The Great British Bake Off but I think it probably helps. I think gay dads are probably a bit more liberal when it comes to these kinds of activities.

I have to admit; when I was his age I loved to cook too. I spent a lot of time with my immigrant grandmother and she was always in the kitchen.

Mostly my job was to stir and taste. However, when I was about Niko’s age, my yia yia taught me how to make tradi-

tional Greek Easter cookies.

Making koulourakia isn’t like whipping up a batch of chocolate chip cookies or some snickerdoodles. It’s an art. Over the next couple of years, I became an expert on how to tell if the dough was ready by feeling and smelling it. I learned just how thin to roll the dough with my palms so the braids wouldn’t be too thick.

This morning after church,

my mom asked Niko if he’d like to come over to help her make those cookies. He was ecstatic, jumping at the opportunity to learn a new cooking skill. And I love the fact that he’s carrying on a great family tradition.

Who knows? Maybe one day we’ll see him on Cupcake Wars suggesting Greek Easter cookies as a legitimate flavor! Q

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24 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | VIEWS

Qsaltlake.com | issue 267 | May 2017

guest editorial (Pa)roll Call: It’s Important to Remember These 10 ‘Conservative Value’ Perverts and Adulterers

BY MIKEY ROX

I wrote

a travel article recently for Out in San Antonio magazine about romantic LGBT-friendly and/or –owned hotels, called “6 hotels you should bang in before you die.” The title’s irreverent, sure, but its purpose, like all good article titles, is to draw readers’ interest — and, if I do say so myself, it’s more exciting than the kissy-face getaway ideas that saturate most travel editorial, because, let’s not kid ourselves, couples (gay and straight) aren’t booking romantic overnights for the free shampoo.

But, the problem, when you’re a gay person, is that when you bring up anything remotely related to sex, you’re automatically branded a deviant.

Now, I usually don’t respond to haters’ comments on my work — except that one time when another gay accused me of being a homophobe; as if — but I just couldn’t let Twitter user @twinmomma’s tweet-response to the article go unanswered. Her suggestion that the LGBT community categorically has sex on the brain, and that’s why the world at large discriminates against us — and this coming from a lesbian herself — was not only homophobic but downright insulting. “really? ‘6 hotels you should bang in’? we wonder why people think LGBT people are only about sex,” she wrote. “Not journalism. You’re better than that.”

I could go on and on about all the reasons she’s wrong, but that would take forever. Instead, I’d like to remind her of these (and there are plenty more) prominent, so-called Christians and conservatives who have been caught with their proverbial pants down, in many cases on company time and their constituents’ dime, who are better-suited targets for her ire. If nothing else, let this list serve as a reminder that double standards and hypocrisy still run rampant, among politicians, but also within our own community. #neverforget

Ed Schrock It’s the tale as old as time. No, not that one. Rather, the one where a Republican Congressman opposes gay-rights issue,

like same-sex marriage and gays in the military, but then has to abandon his bid for a third term because a tape surfaces that incriminates him for soliciting sex from a male prostitute. No beauty in this story; just a beast.

David Dreier Dreier, a congressman from California, supported the Defense of Marriage Act and voted against hate-crime laws that would protect homosexuals as well as the repeal of “don’t ask, don’t tell.” He’s featured in the 2009 documentary Outrage for his alleged relationship with his male chief of staff, Brad Smith.

Mark Foley A leading opponent of child pornography who also served as chairman of the House Caucus of Missing and Exploited Children, Foley resigned his House seat when the sexually explicit e-mails he sent to teen male congressional pages were uncovered. Daddy’s been naughty, y’all.

David Vitter Vitter took over his House seat from former Congressman Robert Livingston following the latter’s own sex scandal, and then suggested that then-President Clinton follow suit and resign his own position in the wake of the Monica Lewinsky controversy. I can only image that he was at a loss for words when his name was discovered in infamous D.C. madam Deborah Jeane Palfrey’s little black book of clients.

Randall L. Tobias Deemed the “AIDS Czar” under George W. Bush, Deputy Secretary of State Tobias didn’t want U.S. funds providing support to countries that permitted prostition. Noble stance. At least it was, until he also admitted to being a sex-paying client of Palfrey’s.

Mark Souder Souder stood proudly atop his soapbox as a devoted advocate of family values and abstinence. But he took his rightful place back in the gutter after an ethics inves-

tigation revealed an extramartial affair with a female staffer.

Chris Lee This idiot. A Congressman respresenting New York, Lee was caught sending shirtless pics to a woman on Craigslist and — get this — used his official Congressional email for all communications.

He resigned hours after the story broke, apologizing to his family, staff, and blahblahblah.

Scott DesJarlais If DesJarlais isn’t the poster boy for husband material, I don’t know who is.

He admitted under oath to at least six extramarital affairs, two of which were with a patient and a staff member while he was a phsyician. If that’s not enough, this jerkoff made his wife have not one but two abortions while he ran on a prolife platform.

Vance McAllister A married father of five in the streets, caught kissing a married staffer in the sheets. OK, not exactly, but the smooch was caught on surveillance camera, which was enough to end his Congressional career.

Newt Gingrich File this under “Why Is This Asshole Still Around?”: While leading the impeachment of then-President Clinton for his dalliances with Lewinsky, Gingrich admitted, at the time, to cheating on his second wife. It ultimately lead to his resignation from the House, but even today the devil’s minion is still manipulating the Republican Party from the inside. Q Mikey Rox is an award-winning journalist and LGBT lifestyle expert whose work has been published in more than 100 outlets across the world. Connect with Mikey on Twitter @mikeyrox.

May 2017 | issue 267 | Qsaltlake.com

VIEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 25

creep of the month

Ramzan Kadyrov File under:

BY D’ANNE WITKOWSKI

More bad news said that reports of gay men being rounded about Russia. up were “absolute lies and disinformation.”

I know, I know. It seems like every time His proof? There are no gay people in you turn around there’s yet another news Chechnya, he said. story about Russia. It’s hard to keep up. And “You cannot detain and persecute people to all of the Trump apologists who shrug who simply do not exist in the republic,” off the growing evidence of Russia not only he said, according to the New York Times. meddling in our election, but also of having “If there were such people in Chechnya, direct ties to the Trump the law-enforcement organs campaign and administration, wouldn’t need to have fuck you, you do not care anything to do with them about our country, and you because their relatives would suck. send them somewhere from So, anyway, while Trump’s which there is no returning.” been busy Tweeting about Yeah, see above where Russia being “fake news” and being gay in Chechnya can how the real story is Obama get you killed either by law spying on him through enforcement or by your own —Ramzan Kadyrov, Trump Tower’s gold-platfamily. News reports have President of the ed microwave, gay men in indicated that honor killings Chechen Republic Chechnya are being rounded are unofficially sanctioned in up and killed for the crime Chechnya in that they don’t of being gay, according to exactly get thorough investiRussian newspaper Novaya Gazeta. gations by law enforcement.

According to the paper, approximately The Guardian quotes Kheda Saratova, who 100 men were rounded up in a “sweep,” and serves on Kadyrov’s human rights council, that at least three have been killed, but it is as saying to a Russian radio station, “In our suspected that number is actually higher.

Chechen society, any person who respects Russia as a whole is not a great place to be our traditions and culture will hunt down gay, but Chechnya is especially bad. Accordthis kind of person without any help from ing to Novaya Gazeta, even being accused of authorities, and do everything to make sure being gay is enough to destroy a man’s repthat this kind of person does not exist in utation. Actually being gay is enough to get our society.” you killed, either by the authorities, or by In other words, Kadyrov’s human rights your family via a so-called “honor killing.” council doesn’t consider LGBT people human.

Apparently the sweep was prompted by a Kadyrov has strong ties to Russian presirequest made in March by an LGBT group dent Vladimir Putin, so make no mistake that seeking official permission to hold a pride this anti-gay pogrom is likely fine by him. parade.

And of course Trump, who vowed to proThe Russian LGBT Network put out a tect LGBTQ people from “hateful foreign statement on April 2 offering emergency ideologies,” is in bed with Putin (figuraaid and asking people who are in danger to tively, not literally, unless there’s another contact them. “We are actively cooperating salacious dossier that I haven’t heard about) with human rights activists in Russia and and that so is Kadyrov. This story alone abroad, and are ready to evacuate people,” should be enough to lay bare the emptiness the statement read in part. of any promise made by Trump to LGBTQ In other words, this is deadly serious. people. Q Especially when you take into consideration the fact that for Chechnya’s leader Ramzan D’Anne Witkowski is a poet, writer and comedian living in Michigan with her wife and son. She has been writing Kadyrov, the whole thing is a joke. Or, more about LGBT politics for over a decade. Follow her on specifically, an “April Fool’s joke.”

Twitter @MamaDWitkowski.

Alvi Karimov, a spokesman for Kadyrov,

“You cannot detain and persecute people who simply do not exist in the republic.”

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26 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | SUMMER MUSIC

Some of

the best things about summer in this state is the outdoor music and the music festivals.

We have hand-picked some of our favorite concert series coming as the weather warms. Take a look and get tickets now, as these all tend to sell out quickly.

Our favorite venue to take in some tones is the slopes of Deer Valley Resort. Two concert series are presented there — the Park City Institute’s ST. REGIS BIG STARS BRIGHT NIGHTS and the DEER VALLEY MUSIC FESTIVAL, put on by the Utah Symphony.

Qsaltlake.com | issue 267 | May 2017

PCI will be bringing the SAN FRANCISCO GAY MEN’S CHORUS to the stage for their second Park City appearance.

Our favorite JERRY STEICHEN will be back with his baton to conduct the Utah Symphony in a Patriotic Celebration featuring LISA VROMAN In town, there is the TWILIGHT CONCERT SERIES, now in its 30th season, each Thursday at Pioneer Park.

On the East Bench, of course, there is the RED BUTTE GARDEN OUTDOOR CONCERT SERIES. Heading up north, there is the

Davis Arts SUMMER NIGHTS WITH THE STARS, once again welcoming IDINA MENZEL to the Kenley Amphitheatre at Layton Park.

Further north is our editor’s favorite: The UTAH FESTIVAL OPERA & MUSICAL THEATRE, this year with HUNCHBACK OF NOTRE DAME, SEUSSICAL, THE MUSIC MAN, PIRATES OF PENZANCE and MADAMA BUTTERFLY. Look through these pages and find your favorites and, like we said, get your tickets fast. You’d hate to find yourself at the end of the season not having enjoyed all the music Utah has to offer.

SUMMER MUSIC | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 27

May 2017 | issue 267 | Qsaltlake.com

Davis Arts bring big acts to Layton

Utah Festival Opera & Musical Theatre Founding General Director Michael Ballam says the silver anniversary season of the Utah Festival Opera & Musical Theatre is a celebration of iconic genius. All the works performed this summer are the supreme offerings in each form of storytelling through music.

From Ballam: Combine France’s premier literary giant Victor Hugo with the storytelling of Walt Disney and voila, Alan Menken and Stephen Schwartz’s THE HUNCHBACK OF NOTRE DAME. This tale for the entire family will star Ezekiel Andrew as Quasimodo. His portrayal of Coalhouse Walker, Jr. in Ragtime last season was one of the most riveting performances in our history.

Everyone loves the rhyming cartoon storytelling of Dr. Seuss. Join your favorite Whoville characters including the Cat in the Hat and Horton the Elephant played by Festival favorites Stefan Espinosa and Lee Daily. Celebrate childhood with catchy tunes and charming stories in the wonderfully whimsical SEUSSICAL at the Utah Theatre.

Travel back to the innocence and charm of 1912 in River City, Iowa, where smalltown antics could bring out the best in its citizens. THE MUSIC MAN is the most iconic Americana musical of all time.

Logan’s own beloved Vanessa Ballam will steal your hearts as Marian the librarian while scoundrel Curt Olds will steal everything else as lovably conniving Professor Harold Hill. Revel in the antics of Lee Daily as Marcellus and Cache Valley’s most comically charismatic citizen Julie Hollist Terrill as Eulalie Mackecknie Shinn.

For our Anglophiles, we present the epitome of British comic opera, Gilbert and Sullivan’s timeless THE PIRATES OF PENZANCE. G.W. Thatcher who built the Capitol (Ellen Eccles) Theatre, loved Gilbert and Sullivan. He traveled annually to the Savoy in London to see their latest, and brought back pirated editions to perform in Logan. The Pirates of Penzance played in Logan before it played in New York City.

On the other side of that coin is the very serious and poignant tale of England’s most notorious monarch, Henry VIII. Michael Ballam will bring to life the powerfully problematic Tudor King coached by lyricist Sheldon Harnick (Fiddler on the Roof) featuring the music of Richard Rodgers (Sound of Music) in REX. This history-making production marks the culmination of a project that began in Logan with a workshop of Rex in 2013.

Rex is generating national attention with Broadway producers, who, along with members of the Richard Rodgers family, will be attending this summer.

It is a rare blessing to have 93-yearyoung Oscar, Tony and Pulitzer Prize-winning genius Sheldon Harnick with us next summer. Join us in A TRIBUTE TO SHELDON HARNICK July 19 as he personally reminisces through his career of nearly seven decades. He is the last of the living Broadway legends.

Puccini’s immortal masterpiece ­MADAMA BUTTERFLY is perfect for the first-time operagoer with its wrenching drama and majestic melodic thrust. Longtime opera lovers can never experience it enough. It springs eternal with each staging.

It is a special joy and celebration to present Kristin Vogel in the title role of Cio-Cio-San. Since her Utah Festival appearance in 2011 she has distinguished herself as an important Puccini heroine throughout the nation.

It is a supreme honor to welcome back what many believe to be Giuseppe Verdi’s crowning achievement, THE VERDI REQUIEM. This monumental masterpiece commands gigantic elements. We are able to mount this majestic work by joining forces of the American Festival Chorus, under the direction of Dr. Craig Jessop, with our world-class orchestra and soloists.

As a civilization we have come to celebrate celebrity more than genius. This summer is a chance to scale the iconic Everests of storytelling through music. Come join us at the summit! Q The full schedule and tickets are available at utahfestival.org

Davis Arts Council announced their lineup for the 2017 Summer Nights with the Stars season. Tickets go on sale to the general public on Tuesday May 2nd at 10 a.m. at tickets.davisarts.org, 801-546-8575, or at the box office at 445 N Wasatch Dr., Layton. Concerts are at the Kenley Amphitheater stage at the north end of Layton Park.

MON, JUNE 12

The Songs & Stories of Neil Diamond Starring Jack Wright MON, JUNE 17

David Archuleta THURS, JUNE 22

Peter Cetera MON, JUNE 26

Ann Wilson of HEART SAT, JULY 08

Ambrosia TUE, JULY 11

Kathy Mattea TUES, JULY 25

Chris Isaak SAT, JULY 29

Nathan Pacheco SAT, AUG. 05

Stephen Bishop SAT, AUG. 12

The Stray Cat Lee Rocker SAT, AUG. 19

Idina Menzel SAT, AUG. 26

The Drifters MON, AUG. 28

Steep Canyon Rangers SAT, SEPT. 2

YES featuring Anderson, Rabin, & Wakeman SAT, SEPT. 4 (LABOR DAY)

Pat Benatar & Neil Giraldo and TOTO SAT, SEPT. 11

Rhythmic Circus: Feet Don’t Fail Me Now SAT, SEPT. 16

Hotel California: A Tribute to the Eagles (HAFB Night)

28 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | SUMMER MUSIC

Qsaltlake.com | issue 267 | May 2017

Park City Institute announces 2017 St Regis Big Stars, Bright Nights Concert Series at Deer Valley The 14th consecutive season of outdoor concerts presented by the Park City Institute begins July 3rd at Deer Valley Resort.

“Our summer

shows always have a mix of emerging and legendary performers,” PCI executive director Teri Orr said. “And this year, we have ten shows with artists who are known for creating powerful connections with the audience.

It’s going to be an exciting summer.”

Season opener, X AMBASSADORS (July 3), hit No. 7 on the Billboard Top 200 chart, with their debut single “Renegade.”

The song created a stir, with its anthemic sound, and its inspiring video highlighting the accomplishments of people with dis-

champion, a three-time ASCAP award winner, and a three-time CMT Award winner.

Pickler’s songs range from rallying cries of female empowerment (“Red High Heels,” and “Don’t You Know You’re Beautiful”) to poignant representations of childhood (“I Wonder”). They all display her rich vocals, and the “down home charm,” called out by the New York Times.

Grammy nominee, and “Wake Me Up” singer, ALOE BLACC (July 23), got us moving with his singing-dancing-storytelling at his 2015 Labor Day show on the Big Stars, Bright Nights stage. He is back

San Francisco Gay Men’s Chorus will perform at the Park City Institute’s St. Regis Big Stars, Bright Nights Concert Series at Deer Valley August 6.

abilities. Hailing from Ithaca, NY, brothers Casey Harris (lead vocals) and Sam Harris (keyboardist), with bandmates Noah Feldshuh (lead guitar) and Adam Levin (drums), dropped their first album, VHS, in 2015, and have a trail of hits, including “Unsteady,” “Gorgeous,” and “Jungle,” and the just-released “Hoping,” — which is raising money for the ACLU. Their reputation for high-energy, all-out performances makes their American rock and roll experience the perfect fit for the holiday weekend.

Since auditioning for American Idol, in 2006, at age 19, country singer KELLIE PICKLER (July 16), has become a recording artist with a solid list of hits on the country and pop charts, a Dancing with the Stars

this summer, with a soul-and-hip-hop performance that promises to lift you up. ”What I want to do with music is make people happy,” Blacc told Billboard about his Grammy-nominated album Lift Your Spirit. “So every song, save for maybe one, is about something that could potentially lift your spirit.” The singer mixes soul, funk and pop with folk and acoustic riffs for a signature sound that the Washington Post called “smart” and “socially conscious without being preachy.”

Rock icon, Grammy winner, and Oscar winner, MELISSA ETHERIDGE (July 27), brings her M.E. Live tour, to our stage.

With the release of her first new album since 2014, MEmphis Rock and Soul, Ether-

idge pays homage to the legendary Stax Records. Etheridge last rocked the Snow Park Amphitheater at Big Stars, Bright Nights in 2011. Beloved by fans for the social conscience she expresses through her songs, Etheridge penned “I Run For Life,” about breast cancer, and “Pulse,” a song she released just eight days after the mass shootings that took place in Orlando on June 12, 2016. She told Rolling Stone, “We want to try to make sense. We want to try to heal. We want to bring some meaning, some purpose. We also want to put it down forever in history. That’s how I’m coping.”

The all-volunteer SAN FRANCISCO GAY MEN’S CHORUS (August 6) has embodied an unparalleled standard of talent-driven social justice, since its first appearance in 1978, at the candlelight vigil following the assassinations of Mayor George Moscone and Supervisor Harvey Milk.

Their first nine-city U.S. tour, in 1981, was so impactful, the Chorus helped many of its host cities establish their own gay men’s choral groups. Today, Artistic Director, Dr. Timothy Seelig, leads over 275 singers in the large chorus, as well as four outreach vocal ensembles. SFGMC recently scrapped plans for an international tour, instead creating an itinerary of stops in “red states.” Launching in October, The Lavender Pen Tour will harness the power of the SFGMC’s message of equality and inclusiveness, and the value in treating all individuals — irrespective of differences — with dignity. They will bring their songs of inspiration, hope—and a healthy dose of their signature whimsy—to our stage.

American Acoustic: PUNCH BROTHERS, I’M WITH HER, and JULIAN LAGE (August 15) brings two Nickel Creek alumni — Chris Thile and Sarah Watkins — and a host of other talented musicians, together, for an unparalleled jazz-and-bluegrassinfused jam session. Punch Brothers, fronted by Prairie Home Companion host Thile, with Paul Kowert (bass), Noam Pikelny (banjo), Chris Eldridge (guitar), and Gabe Witcher (violin) and I’m With Her — Watkins, Sarah Jarosz, and Aoife O’Donovan. The two bands are joined by in-demand composer and jazz guitarist Julian Lage. Thile cooked up the tour after he curated a weekend-long festival on the Kennedy Center stage in Washington, DC. “We started discussing how to make this tour happen as we were walking offstage,” he said. “On one hand, there was that de-

SUMMER MUSIC | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 29

May 2017 | issue 267 | Qsaltlake.com

Melissa Etheridge, July 27

lightful sense of discovery and almost childish wonder that you hope for when working with musicians you admire in a new context, but on the other, the kind of artistic compatibility and ease of communication you usually only experience in longstanding collaborations.”

SMASH MOUTH (August 18) has a just-released a new album, “Magic,” billed as a “noholds-barred party from start to finish.” Expect hits, like “All Star,” to get you dancing, and new catchy tunes that keep you on your feet. This show also features soulful alt-rock band, Cracker and new-wave power-pop artists, The Romantics (“What I Like About You,” “Talking in Your Sleep”).

The last time FIVE FOR FIGHTING (August 26) played a Big Stars, Bright Nights show, singer-songwriter-one-manband, John Ondrasik found the crowd’s party vibe so intoxi-

cating that he switched up his set, on-the-spot, to include a mix of classic get-up-and-dance songs with his own music. This year, he’s back with a string ensemble. His songs — including hits like “Superman,” “100 Years,” and “God Made You,” are alternately infectious and thoughtful.

JOSH TURNER (September 3) brings his signature deep-bass voice, to close out the season in county style. Turner—the youngest artist to be inducted into the Grand Old Opry—is the singer and songwriter Rolling Stone calls “a country purist.” His just-released sixth studio album, “Deep South,” debuted at number one on Billboard’s Top Country Albums chart. The two-time Grammy nominee will showcase hits like “Why Don’t We Just Dance,” “All Over Me,” and “Hometown Girl,” for an unforgettable showman’s show.

In addition to the nine shows that were previewed at the sponsor event, Orr said one more act will be named, soon, for a date to be announced. Q Tickets for all shows are on sale exclusively at the Eccles Center Box office. Purchases may be made in person, 1750 Kearns Boulevard, Park City, or by phone 435655-3114.

Support the Salt Lake Men’s Choir when you shop on Amazon using

It’s easy! You shop. Amazon gives.

1. Bookmark bit.ly/saltlakemenschoir 2. Use that link to shop on the same Amazon you always use 3. Enjoy your purchase (and that warm feeling knowing that a percentage of your sale supports the choir) Easy, peasy! Thanks!

SaltLakeMensChoir.org

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30 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | SUMMER MUSIC

Qsaltlake.com | issue 267 | May 2017

Red Butte Garden announces its Outdoor Concert Series

There is

almost nothing that compares to a concert on the grounds of Red Butte Garden as the sun sets and the lights of the city start to twinkle. Mega fans look forward to summer almost exclusively for these musical nights.

TUESDAY, MAY 23

SUNDAY, JUNE 18

Jethro Tull by Ian Anderson

Dispatch: America, Location 12 Tour with Guster and Jake Shimabukuro

$55–62

Ian Anderson, known throughout the world of rock music as the flute and voice behind the legendary Jethro Tull, celebrates his 46th year as an international recording and performing musician in 2014. In recent years, he has toured more and more as simply Ian Anderson, often with orchestras, string quartets, featured soloists.

FRIDAY, JUNE 2

Trey Anastasio Band—Paper Wheels Tour $45–52 Trey Anastasio began his career as the guitarist and vocalist for the band Phish. He has performed with the New York Philharmonic, the Los Angeles Philharmonic, and the Atlanta Symphony Orchestra, among others. In 2013, he was nominated for a Tony Award and two Drama Desk Awards for the original score of the Broadway musical “Hands on a Hardbody.”

SUNDAY, JUNE 4

TajMo: The Taj Mahal & Keb’ Mo’ Band $38–45 Composer, multi-instrumentalist and vocalist Taj Mahal is one of the most prominent and influential figures in late 20th century blues and roots music. Though his career began more than four decades ago with American blues, he has broadened his artistic scope over the years to include music representing virtually every corner of the world — west Africa, the Caribbean, Latin America, Europe, the Hawaiian islands and so much more. Three-time Grammy winner and visionary roots-music storyteller Keb’ Mo’ embarks on a new chapter in his career with the April 22 release of BLUESAmericana on Kind of Blue Music.

Guster, Jake Shimabukuro $48–55 “We’ve been called the biggest band nobody’s ever heard of,” says Brad Corrigan, one of Dispatch’s three singers and multi-instrumentalists. “People either know everything about us or they know nothing. There never seems to be any middle ground.” He’s not kidding. When Dispatch called it quits in 2004, their farewell show at the Hatch Shell in Boston drew 110,000 fans from around the world TUESDAY, JUNE 20

Jason Mraz & His Superband $65–72 Hailed by the New York Times as “part Jack Johnson, part Eckhart Tolle,” Jason Mraz’s amazing journey has propelled him from Southern California’s vaunted coffee house scene to arenas, amphitheatres, and stadiums all over the world. The San Diego-based troubadour has earned diamond, multi-platinum or platinum certifications in numerous territories for his various releases, as well as a myriad of accolades including two GRAMMY Awards WEDNESDAY, JUNE 28

Santana—Transmogrify Tour 2017 $112–119 In the 1960’s, Santana hit the Bay Area scene with historic shows at the Fillmore and emerged onto the global stage at Woodstock in 1969. More than 40 years later, Santana has sold over 100 million records and won nine Grammys for 1999’s Album of the Year, Supernatural.

Santana’s 2012 album Shape Shifter debuted at #16 on the Billboard Top 200, and their new Latin-music album, Corazón, features collaborations with various artists.

THURSDAY, JULY 6

Kenny Wayne Shepherd Band $40–47 Utter the phrase “young blues rock guitarist” within earshot of anyone with even a cursory knowledge of the modern musical vanguard and the first name they are most likely to respond with will be Kenny Wayne Shepherd. The Louisiana born axeman and songsmith has sold millions of albums while throwing singles into the Top 10, shining a light on the rich blues of the past and forging ahead with his own modern twist on a classic sound he has embodied since his teens.

THURSDAY, JULY 13

Amos Lee $37–44 In Amos Lee’s fifth album, Mountains Of Sorrow, Rivers Of Song, he took a different path for the recording; he worked in a new city with a new producer, while, for the first time, he brought his touring band into the studio with him. The twelve songs that resulted—the follow-up to 2011’s chart-topping Mission Bell—bring Amos into new sonic territory, while retaining the trenchant impact of the scenes, characters, and stories in his writing.

FRIDAY, JULY 14

North Mississippi Allstars & Anders Osborne Present: N.M.O. / Lukas Nelson & Promise of the Real $34–41 North Mississippi Allstars and Anders Osborne create a one of a kind musical experience by combining two of American music’s most riveting acts into one collective performance.

Fusing the Dickinson Brothers’ blues-infused rock and roll with Anders Osborne’s unique brand of New Orleans soul, these two acts come together to create a live collaboration on stage every night. On the new Lukas Nelson & Promise of the Real album, Something Real, he and his band take us further down the path Nelson been blazing since 2008, when he and

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May 2017 | issue 267 | Qsaltlake.com

drummer Anthony LoGerfo met at a Neil Young concert and began laying the groundwork for Promise of the Real.

THURSDAY, JULY 20

Mary Chapin Carpenter Sarah Jarosz $44–51

that breaks down barriers. Lovett has appeared in 13 feature films, and on stage and television.

Among his many accolades, besides the four Grammy Awards, he was recently named the Texas State Musician.

TUESDAY, JULY 25

Portugal. The Man $35–42

SUNDAY, JULY 23

For nearly thirty years strong, on many albums like Come On Come On, Stones in the Road, Between Here and Gone, and Ashes and Roses, Mary Chapin Carpenter has earned the trust of her audience through her willingness to look deep into herself and share joys and sorrows, good times and bad. That honesty, that quiet fearlessness, reaches a startling new level on The Things That We Are Made Of. These eleven songs communicate with the plain-spokenness of handwritten, heartfelt letters from a confiding friend; this is art without the artifice.

THURSDAY, JULY 21

Lyle Lovett and his Large Band $47–54 A singer, composer and actor, Lyle Lovett has broadened the definition of American music in a career that spans 14 albums. Coupled with his gift for storytelling, the Texas-based musician fuses elements of country, swing, jazz, folk, gospel and blues in a convention-defying manner

Retro Futura Tour—Howard Jones / The English Beat / Men Without Hats $45–52 In 1983 Howard Jones first burst upon the contemporary music scene with his very English songwriting, pioneering synthesizers and thought provoking lyrics. He set out his manifesto in his very first single ‘New Song,’ recently used in a pivotal scene in ‘Breaking Bad’ where Aaron Paul’s character Jessie Pinkman questions if he wants to ‘play by the rules’. The English Beat is a band with an energetic mix of musical styles and a sound like no other. The band’s unique sound has allowed it to endure for nearly three decades and appeal to fans, young and old, all over the world. The new wave synth pop collective Men Without Hats were formed in 1980 by brothers Ivan and Stefan Doroschuk.

Ivan was the leader of the group, writing the majority of the songs and providing the lead vocals; Stefan was the guitarist.

Portugal. The Man’s nomadic path snakes down the Cascades, starting first in Wasilla, Alaska (yes, the very same city whose identity has been hijacked by a certain celebrity politician, one who we shall not mention again here), and then eventually settling in amongst the puddles and monochromatic haze of Portland, Ore. There were Iditarod-racing parents, wooden cabins tucked deep in the woods, and the sort of upbringing that skews the very notion of convention.

TUESDAY, AUGUST 1

Wheels of Soul 2017 Summer Tour—Tedeschi Trucks Band The Wood Brothers, Hot Tuna $68–75 Tedeschi Trucks Band is an 11-member collective that thrills audiences worldwide with its transcendent live performances and award-winning albums. Formed in 2010 by husband-and-wife Susan Tedeschi and Derek Trucks, and featuring two harmony singers, a three-piece horn section, keyboards, bass and a pair of drummers, TTB disproves the adage “less is more” while building a devoted following of fans and critics alike.

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32 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | SUMMER MUSIC

Qsaltlake.com | issue 267 | May 2017

TUESDAY, AUGUST 15

The Decemberists Olivia Chaney $45–52

WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 2

John Williams’ Film Music featuring the Utah Symphony $16–41 Immerse yourself in the beauty of Red Butte Garden and experience the talent of the Utah Symphony,one of only 15 full-time professional orchestras in the United States. Whether it’s the powerful marches from Star Wars, the awe-inspiring score from Jurassic Park, or the adventure of the music from E.T., John Williams’ film music has provided the soundscape for many of the world’s most popular movies for decades. Conducted by Randall Craig Fleischer.

FRIDAY, AUGUST 4

Drive-By Truckers Asleep at the Wheel $38–45 Drive-By Truckers have always been outspoken, telling a distinctly American story via craft, character, and concept, all backed by sonic ambition and social conscience. Founded in 1996 by singer/songwriter/guitarists Mike Cooley and Patterson Hood, the band have long held a progressive fire in their belly but with AMERICAN BAND, they have made the most explicitly political album in their extraordinary canon.

THURSDAY, AUGUST 10

Gregory Alan Isakov / Blind Pilot $35–42 Gregory Alan Isakov is an indie folk artist whose music captures America’s scenic ruralism and working class ethos. His style can be gritty and reminiscent of the tortured desolateness heard from Woody Guthrie, but it can also be reflective and calming like the music of his contemporary Iron and Wine. Blind Pilot has performed on Ellen and The Late Show with David Letterman, and Lollapalooza.

SUNDAY, AUGUST 13

The Head and the Heart Matt Hopper & The Roman Candles $40–47 The Head and the Heart’s third release, Signs of Light, is due out September 9. Recorded in Nashville with producer Jay Joyce, Signs of Light crackles with the upbeat sing-a-long energy that is The Head and the Heart’s finest work to date.

What a Terrible World, What a Beautiful World, is the band’s most varied and dynamic work, both musically and emotionally. Since their earliest recordings more than a decade ago, the Decemberists have always been known for their sense of scope and daring WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 16

Chick Corea Elektric Band / Béla Fleck and the Flecktones $55–62 Master songwriters, musicians and bandleaders Chick Corea and Bela Fleck come together for a thrilling, genre-busting evening of piano and banjo duets. With a beguiling mix of tunes traversing a slew of genres from jazz, bluegrass, rock, flamenco and gospel this casual and intimate encounter with two legends from different musical worlds combines classic works with music from their Grammy-winning duo album, The Enlightenment and the new release called Two. THURSDAY, AUGUST 17

Trombone Shorty & Orleans Avenue / St. Paul & The Broken Bones $46–53 New Orleans native Trombone Shorty began his career as a bandleader at the young age of six, toured internationally at age 12, and spent his teens playing with various brass bands throughout New Orleans and touring worldwide with Lenny Kravitz. He is currently the front man for his own ensemble Orleans Avenue, a funk/rock/ jazz/hip-hop band.

SUNDAY, AUGUST 20

Herbie Hancock $45–52 Herbie Hancock is a true icon of modern music.

Throughout his explorations, he has transcended limitations and genres while maintaining his unmistakable voice. With an illustrious career spanning five decades and 14 Grammy Awards MONDAY, AUGUST 21

Lake Street Dive $35–42 The members of Lake Street Dive—named after an avenue of seedy bars in Olson’s native Minneapolis—met in 2004 as students at Boston’s New England Conservatory of Music.

Powerhouse singer Rachael Price fronted the quartet and drummer Michael Calabrese filled out the rhythm section.

THURSDAY, AUGUST 31

ZZ Top—Tonnage Tour $78–85

ZZ Top, aka “That Little Ol’ Band From Texas,” lay undisputed claim to being the longest running major rock band with original personnel intact and, in 2004, the Texas trio was inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame.

WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 6

John Butler Trio Nattali Rize $37–44 An independent role model, founder of Australia’s Jarrah Records, family man and proud skateboard aficionado, JB, in spite of his matey public persona, remains an enigma. He is from everywhere and nowhere, an Australian/American, Everyman/Nowhere Man, and his music mixes rootedness and rootlessness, pain and celebration in a way that is utterly beguiling.

FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 8

Jason Isbell and the 400 Unit Frank Turner & the Sleeping Souls $39–46 Raw, open, and reflective. Sobriety can be like that. Jason Isbell’s made it past his first year, which is rather more than a promise and will always be far from a guarantee.

TUESDAY, SEPTEMBER 12

HAIM $35–42 Hailing from California’s sunny San Fernando valley, HAIM is the GRAMMY-nominated band made up of sisters Este, Danielle, and Alana Haim. The trio’s effervescent full-length debut Days Are Gone showcases the undeniable songwriting and peerless dynamics that have made the band successful among critics and fans worldwide.

WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 13

Sheryl Crow—Be Myself Tour $80–87 Sheryl Crow returns with her ninth studio album, Be Myself. “This past summer, because of what was going on in the world and particularly in the United States; I began to feel a sense of urgency about writing,” she said.

THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 14

Gov’t Mule—Revolution Come…

Revolution Go Tour $35–42 Steeped in the roots and mystique of rock, blues, soul, jazz and country, Revolution Come...

Revolution Go enriches Gov’t Mule’s distinguished legacy with cleverly-crafted songs, intelligent and timely lyrical commentary, and downright incendiary playing, while the depth and breadth of the band’s stunning songwriting is displayed with full force.

More information and ticket sales are at redbuttegarden.org/concerts/

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May 2017 | issue 267 | Qsaltlake.com

Deer Valley Music Festival Music on the slopes of the Deer Valley Resort, in the mountains where summer is cooler. Single tickets for performances on sale on April 4 at 10 a.m. at deervalleymusicfestival.org or 801-533-NOTE. SAT JULY 1 | 7:30 PM

Utah Symphony SAT, JULY 8 | 7:30 PM

The Beach Boys with the Utah Symphony Randall Craig Fleischer, conductor WED, JULY 12 | 8:00 PM

A Night at Bach’s Coffeehouse

Patriotic Celebration featuring Lisa Vroman

St. Mary’s Church Jeannette Sorrell, conductor Utah Symphony

Jerry Steichen, conductor Lisa Vroman, vocalist Utah Symphony WED, JULY 5 | 8:00 PM

Vivaldi’s Four Seasons St. Mary’s Church Madeline Adkins, lead, violin soloist Utah Symphony FRI, JULY 7 | 7:30 PM

Randall Craig Fleischer, conductor Patti Austin, vocalist

FRI, JULY 28 | 7:30 PM

Disney in Concert A Dream is a Wish

THU, JULY 20 | 7:30 PM

Ben Folds with the Utah Symphony

The Music of Prince with the Utah Symphony

FRI, JULY 14 | 7:30 PM

Gershwin’s Greatest Hits

FRI, JULY 21 | 7:30 PM

John Morris Russell, conductor Kevin Cole, guest artist Utah Symphony

Tad Calcara, clarinet Utah Symphony

St. Mary’s Church Rei Hotoda, conductor Hana Chang, violin Utah Symphony

Brent Havens, conductor Marshall Charloff, lead singer, guitar Utah Symphony

SAT, JULY 15 | 7:30 PM

Ella at 100: Patti Austin sings Ella Fitzgerald with the Utah Symphony

WED, JULY 19 | 8:00 PM

Hotoda conducts Beethoven, Haydn and more

Diana Krall SAT, JULY 22 | 7:00 PM

Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone in Concert

Leslie Odom, Jr. with the Utah Symphony

Justin Freer, conductor

John Morris Russell, conductor Leslie Odom, Jr., vocalist Utah Symphony

Calcara Plays Copland

WED, JULY 26 | 8:00 PM

St. Mary’s Church Conner Gray Covington, conduct.

Andy Einhorn, conductor SAT, JULY 29 | 7:30 PM

Andy Einhorn, conductor Ben Folds, vocalist Utah Symphony FRI, AUGUST 4 | 7:30 PM

Tchaikovsky’s 1812 Overture Piano Concerto No. 1 Rei Hotoda, conductor Andrew Staupe, piano Cannoneers of the Wasatch Utah Symphony SAT, AUGUST 5 | 7:30 PM

Classical Mystery Tour Martin Herman, conductor Classical Mystery Tour, guest artist Utah Symphony

Modern Weddings Classic Setting

Thomas S. Monson Center 411 East South Temple, Salt Lake City, UT 84111 801-213-8770 monsoncenter.utah.edu

34 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | SUMMER MUSIC

Qsaltlake.com | issue 267 | May 2017

2017 Twilight Concert Series Celebrating

30 years of programming, the Twilight Concert Series s one of the highlights of summer in downtown Salt Lake City. Held on Thursday evenings July through August, the series presents a wide range of outstanding musicians from across the country and around the world.

The Salt Lake City Arts Council has joined this year with title sponsor Salt Lake Community College to present the evening concerts.

2017 Twilight Concert Series general admission tickets are $7.50 in advance or $10 the day of show. $5 single and $35 general admission season early bird tickets are available now through May 14.

The VIP Lounge at Twilight will once again be available for the public ages 21 and over and offers an exclusive experience including a private cash bar, private restrooms, special pre-show performances and other evening entertainment. VIP Lounge tickets include access to both the general admission concert venue and lounge. VIP Lounge access is first come, first served and limited. Early bird VIP Lounge tickets are $25 for a single show or $165 for a season pass until May 14. After May 14 VIP Lounge tickets will be $30 for a single show and $190 for a season pass.

Tickets are available at www.24tix.com and all Graywhale Entertainment locations throughout the valley.

The concerts are accompanied by the Twilight Market, where people of all ages can enjoy this festival-like atmosphere with local food and beverages. New this year, the Arts Council is partnering with the Food Truck League to bring a variety of food vendors each week. Follow Twilight social media feeds for updates on which awesome food trucks will be onsite each week.

The Arts Council is also partnering with Craft Lake City DIY Festival to present the Craft Market showcasing Salt Lake City’s eclectic variety of talented artisans specializing in a variety of mediums including jewelry, screen-printing, craft foods and DIY-engineered electronics.

Gates open at 5 p.m. and music starts at 6:30pm at Pioneer Park located at 350 West 300 South in downtown Salt Lake City.

Visit twilightconcerts.com for updates and further information.

2017 Twilight Concert Series Lineup: JULY 20

Little Dragon Gothenburg’s Little Dragon has steadily grown from being the biggest underground secret to international acclaim after four successful albums and touring all over the world. Their energetic live set and unique recording process has made fans out of some of the biggest names in music including Pharrell Williams, Questlove, and OutKast.

Special Guest: XENIA RUBINOS: Vocalist and composer Xenia Rubinos’ powerhouse vocals are at the center of her music which grows from a wide range of influences from R&B to hip-hop to Caribbean rhythms and jazz all delivered with a soulful punk aura.

JULY 27

Kurt Vile & the Violators Philadelphia singer, songwriter and multi-instrumentalist’s combination of low fi rock stylings and unique songwriting have made him one of the premiere voices in indie rock today.

Special Guest: WHITNEY: On their debut, Light Upon the Lake,Whitney made casually melancholic music that combines the wounded drawl of Townes Van Zandt, the rambunctious energy of Jim Ford, the stoned affability of Bobby Charles, the American otherworldliness of The Band, and the slack groove of early Pavement.

AUGUST 3

Kamasi Washington A universally talented saxophone player who’s 2015 triple-disc masterpiece The Epic debuted on iTunes jazz charts across the globe at the same time as his work on Kendrik Lamar’s To Pimp a Butterfly was blowing up the musicsphere. Kamasi and his ten piece ensemble “The Next Step” give a genre-bending, modern spin on the big band.

Special Guest: ANTIBALAS: Born in a Brooklyn warehouse in 1997, 12-piece ensemble Antibalas is credited with introducing Afrobeat to a wider global audience, influencing countless musicians and developing a live show that is the stuff of legend.

AUGUST 10

Solange Singer, songwriter and producer, Solange Knowles’ 2016 album, A Seat at the Table, co-executive produced alongside Raphael Saadiq, debut at #1 on the Billboard Top 200.

Solange describes A Seat At The Table, which she began writing in 2013, as “a project on identity, empowerment, independence, grief and healing.”

Special Guest: KAYTRANADA: Born in Haiti and raised in the city of Montreal, Canadian artist Kaytranada has experienced an explosive rise in the past couple of years with his irresistible production and live DJ sets. He continues to bridge the gap between the dance world and hip hop/R&B. His stellar album 99.9% recorded with a series of high profile collaborations, only confirms his position as one of the most important producers in today’s musical landscape.

SUMMER MUSIC | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 35

May 2017 | issue 267 | Qsaltlake.com

AUGUST 17

Cat Power (solo) American singer-songwriter and musician Chan Marshall has worked on a number of different projects under the Cat Power moniker since the early 90’s. Critics have noted the constant evolution of Cat Power’s sound, with a “mix of punk, folk and blues” on her earliest albums, and elements of soul and other genres more prevalent in her later material. Her 2012 album Sun incorporated electronica, in a self-proclaimed move from the “really slow guitar songs” she initially wrote for the album.

Special Guest TBA AUGUST 24: TBA AUGUST 31

The Roots Having previously released twelve projects, The Roots have become one of the best known and most respected hip-hop acts in the business, winning four Grammys, including “Best R&B Album” for Wake Up!, “Best Traditional R&B

Vocal Performance” for “Hang in There” (with John Legend) and “Best Group or Duo R&B Vocal Performance” for “Shine.” The ensemble was most recently nominated for “Best Rap Album” for the 2011 release of undun. Recently The Roots were named one of the greatest live bands around by Rolling Stone and became the official house band on The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon where they currently perform every MondayFriday. The Roots celebrated the release of their 11th studio album …and then you shoot your cousin in May 2014.

Special Guest: CHARLES BRADLEY & HIS EXTRAORDINAIRES: The Screaming Eagle of Soul, Charles Bradley has made a name for himself as a riveting live performer. His remarkable against-allodds story and rise from his first release, No Time For Dreaming on through to his most recent album, Changes, can only be matched by the soul singer’s funky, heartfelt live performance each time he graces the stage. Q

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36 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | A&E

Qsaltlake.com | issue 267 | May 2017

Everything from Angels to Zen

‘There is No Difference’ prose by Richard Clegg at Marmalade Library 12896 S Pony Express Rd Suite 200 in Draper (just north of IKEA) 801.333.3777 www.ilovelotus.com

BY CRAIG OGAN LotusStore

GAY WRITES

A DiverseCity Series writing group A program of Salt Lake Community College’s Community Writing Ctr. The group meets the 2nd and 4th Monday of each month, 6:30-8 pm, Salt Lake City Library Square, 210 E. 400 South, Ste. 8, Salt Lake.

An evening

of prose and poetry at the Marmalade Branch of the City Library may answer the question: Why would a “little boy from Magna” want to share his personal thoughts in public?

The “little boy,” Richard Clegg, now north of 60 years old, will shed light on the answer as he reads his prose and poetry Tuesday, May 9th from 6:30 to 7:30 pm at the library.

Why hire a hall and read his poetry and prose to friends and strangers? Richard answers he wants to affect other lives in the most positive way possible.

“My prose primarily tells my story of surviving being born gay; transcending the bigotry and prejudiced any one ‘different’ must face and being joyously happy at having lived an authentic life.”

His poetry is an attempt at sharing, “Soulful moments of triumph over challenges and moments of sheer joy at the tiniest and seemingly most insignificant of the world’s pleasures.”

Richard laughingly says, “Born and raised in Magna, currently the hotbed of murder and mayhem, [was] then a rather charming small mining town.” It’s there he gained an appreciation for art. He’s passionate for classical music because his, “Grandma turned me on to Opera at the U of U Summer Festivals (he asks if anyone is old enough to remember them?).”

A love of architecture may stem from his Great-granddad, Carl Neuhausen, who was

the architect for the South Temple Landmark, Cathedral of the Madeleine.

A graduate of Cyprus High and has a Bachelor’s Degree from University of Utah and has what he dubs, “2nd and 3rd useless BDs, from the University of Maryland University College European Division.

He was an Academic Advisor at UM’s European Headquarters in Heidelberg, Germany. He lived in Europe for 26 years with his husband, whose death necessitated Richard’s return to the USA. Returning to SLC he became part of Gay Writes (Community Writing Center at Salt Lake Community College). He has been productive writer, “I’ve written long and hard for 20 years producing 35 journal volumes.” Richard has been published in the Gay Writes columns QSaltLake publishes, monthly.

Sort of an art polymath, he is a visual artist, a collector and a musician. His artwork for instance, has been on the cover of Sine Cera - CWC’s anthology of community writers’ work. His work is featured in private collections of friends and collectors in Europe. He could play the piano, but for a wounded finger.

He discovered, “I very much enjoy reading my poetry and prose before an audience.

I want those who read or listen to my words be touched in some small way, changed in perhaps a big way and say to themselves.

“Wow, I’m not the only one who has felt like that. He gets it and so do I!” Q

“There Is No Difference” Poetry and Prose written and read by Richard Clegg Marmalade Branch, the City Library 280 W. 500 North, S Tuesday, May 9, 2017 6:30–7:30 pm Light refreshments before and after limited parking — car sharing / mass transit advised

A&E | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 37

May 2017 | issue 267 | Qsaltlake.com

OutField Continued from page 17

tionality — shored up the organization. They spent months getting 501(c)(3) status.

Now the Foundation is at a turning point. “We’re still very committed to this,” Griffin says. “But we want someone else to step up and take over.”

So far, no one has. “I understand it’s hard,” says the author and University of Massachusetts professor emerita of social justice “People have jobs and lives. They’re committed to other advocacy groups.”

What does all this say about the current state of the LGBT sports movement?

“It’s strong, in the sense that members of the Coalition do amazing work, in organizations like the NCAA and National Center for Lesbian

Rights. They’re just doing it outside the Coalition,” Griffin says. “But it’s sad because we could do so much more if we got our act together. All we need is someone to take charge.”

Every movement has growing pains. The LGBT sports movement is still growing. It encompasses many viewpoints, and with visibility comes diversity.

“We’re all still passionate,” Griffin notes. “We may have our philosophical differences, but we all still work for what we believe in.”

She ends the interview. It’s time for her and Chris Mosier — trans athlete and Foundation member — to lead another workshop. Q Dan Woog is a journalist, educator, soccer coach and gay activist. His latest book is “We Kick Balls: True Stories from the Youth Soccer Wars.” He can be reached care of this publication or at OutField@ qsyndicate.com.

artists of ballet west | photo by beau pearson

BALLE T WE S T

NATIONAL CHOREO GR APHIC FE STIVAL may 19–20

may 26–27

Sarasota Ballet Pacific Northwest Ballet Pennsylvania Ballet Oregon Ballet Theatre Ballet West Ballet West

801·869·6900 | balletwest.org

38 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | THEATER

Qsaltlake.com | issue 267 | May 2017

The unpopular seduction of the gaythemed musical ‘Kiss of the Spider Woman’

BY BLAIR HOWELL

Two men

are brutally thrust into a jail cell together during a fascist dictatorship of a South American country and are immediately at odds with each other. They have vastly different demeanors and ideologies.

They are the strangest of bedfellows.

“These main characters are Molina and Valentin,” says Utah Repertory Theater Company’s founder and artistic director Johnny Hebda, who directs the Broadway musical Kiss of the Spider Woman. “Molina refers to himself as ‘the resident queen,’ and Valentin is a young, masculine revolutionary. This makes for an interesting dynamic in the claustrophobic cell which the two men are forced to share.”

But through the story of Spider Woman, audiences startlingly discover that the “underlying themes — of political revolution, homosexual persecution, friendship, and love — that combine to create a darker and more nuanced musical than the ‘kiss’ in its title initially suggests,” according to one writer.

“The titular Spider Woman is a character from one of Molina’s favorite films that is played by Aurora, the actress that he idolizes,” Hebda explains. Spider Woman appears on stage but exists only in his fantasies. “She is the one character that Molina is terrified of because anytime she kisses individuals in the movie, they die.

This metaphor plays out throughout the show as we see the Spider Woman before a prisoner dies, and she is foreshadowing events taking place in the present.”

To alleviate the jailyard’s day-to-day drudgery and seemingly continuous violence, Molina entertains Valentin by retelling the fantastical stories of his favorite movies that starred Aurora.

“There is no question that Molina, the gay male protagonist, is definitely the hero.

This is rarely seen in most any other story,” Hebda says. “The story breaks down walls and stereotypes in showing homosexuals in a positive and noble light.”

Both men are gradually transformed by their guarded but growing relationship and

by Molina’s obsession with the fantasy and romance of the movies, which Valentin begins to appreciate.

The master composers John Kander and

Fred Ebb wrote the Spider Woman musical a few years after the duo’s most acclaimed popular Cabaret and Chicago, which were first Broadway musicals before becoming widely entertaining movie adaptations.

Spider Woman is considered the team’s most spellbinding and provocative work, yet perhaps as a direct consequence of the controversies of the time, it fell into obscurity and is seldom produced. It is, however, considered the duo’s “lost jewel.”

“Audiences will be captivated by the story, the music, the dancing, the live orchestra, and the intimacy created by the black box spacestyle theater,” the director believes.

“Audiences will be sucked into the world of the show and relate to the themes presented.

The story is captivating and easily accessible by a wide variety of audiences and backgrounds.

It’s very dark in nature, but the mix of show-stopping glitter and glam, and well-placed comedy, coupled with a resounding theme of love, acceptance and survival, audiences will come away moved and satisfied.”

The initial story of the Spider Woman appeared in the controversial Spanish-language novel, El Beso de la Mujer Araña, written by Argentine Manuel Puig and published in 1976, and went on to win a Pulitzer Prize. The novel’s adaptation was the first independent film to be nominated in all the top Oscars categories including Best Picture. And, playing Molina, William Hurt was the first actor to win a Best Actor Academy Award for playing a homosexual.

“The abstract storytelling in the Broadway version has led to a lot of creative choices,” Hebda says. “I have enjoyed blending the fantasy world and the literal world together through using a variety of conventions. Additionally, having an all-male ensemble playing fellow prisoners and other characters was also very unique

and presented interesting choreography and styles.”

Observers believe Spider Woman won the Best Musical Tony for its vast strength, even though it was up against more commercially viable fare as the rock-infused The Who’s Tommy, the Bernadette Peters/ Martin Short-headlined musical comedy The Goodbye Girl, and the eagerly anticipated British import Blood Brothers.

“Audiences will be captivated by the story, the music, the dancing, the live orchestra, and the intimacy created by the black-box theater space,” Hebda continues.

“Audiences will be sucked into the world of the show and relate to the themes presented. The story is captivating and easily accessible by a wide variety of audiences

and backgrounds. It’s very dark in nature, but with the mix of show-stopping glitter and glam, and well-placed comedy — coupled with a resounding theme of love, acceptance and survival — audiences will come away deeply moved and satisfied.”

Spider Woman flung open the door for a renaissance of serious musical-theater storytelling, while the messages remain as timely today as when it was first produced.

Hailed as “one of the most compelling, most emotional musicals ever written for the stage, a show about the healing power of storytelling amidst profound suffering, about the power of people to change each other’s lives,” The Kiss of the Spider Woman will be produced by Utah Repertory Theater Company April 21–May 7 at the Sorenson Unity Center’s Black Box Theater, 1383 S. 900 West, Salt Lake City. Tickets can be purchased at utahrep.org/tickets. Q PHOTO: CJ STRONG PHOTOGRAPHY

May 2017 | issue 267 | Qsaltlake.com

Nonstop Hookups Reach Utah’s LGBT Market QPages Directory, distributed at Utah Pride and through the year, goes to press very soon. sales@qsaltlake.com

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Q&A | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 39

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40 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | Q&A

Qsaltlake.com | issue 267 | May 2017

Where in the World is

‘Drag Race’ alum transitioned from male to female after the show — now, she’s helping the world transition too

BY CHRIS AZZOPARDI

Carmen

Carrera calls herself a “changed” person after competing on the third season of RuPaul’s Drag Race in 2011. Following her stint on the show, the Puerto Rican-Peruvian model transitioned from male to female and now uses her own experience as a transgender woman to inspire others who are grappling with their gender identity.

To fulfill her mission to raise trans awareness abroad, Carrera recently

Carmen Carrera? traveled to São Paulo, Brazil, for an episode of the Fusion docuseries Outpost, which mines globally-resonant human, social and cultural stories. Here, she talks about the eye-opening experience, as well as those who still consider her a “joke.”

From ‘Drag Race’ to activist Drag Race was a moment in my past — I wanted to do that show because I knew that after the show I was gonna transition, so, for me, that is always gonna be a time capsule in my life. And honestly, I’ve grown so much as a person since then. The Drag Race community got to know me right out of the club scene. I’m now 31. I am a wife. I am a stepmother.

I’m still a lot of fun (laughs), but I’m way more responsible than I’ve ever been, and I’m happy about it too. I see myself as a very privileged trans woman; I’m able to experience what it feels like to have love and have children and work and survive, so I feel like in that sense I’ve changed a whole lot. During Drag

Race, I’m not even sure I had a license back then. I was just having fun, dressing up, and living my own ideology of who I wanted to be on the inside. Then, everything changed; I got my birth certificate changed, and now I really feel like my life’s in order. And I always just have had this desire to help others, you know. Now, I see myself in a totally different place and I wanna be able to [tell] trans people, “You have more possibilities than you even realize.”

Going global with her trans activism I set out on a journey to contribute my community activism outside of the United States. I wanted to take the same things that I learned here from people like Laverne [Cox], Janet [Mock], Caitlyn [Jenner] and Jenna [Talackova] and connect back to my roots, to really go back to South America and Central America and try to be an activist. So, I started off with Mexico, where they allowed me to basically bring trans issues to Mexican news stations. I was able to bring that to

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May 2017 | issue 267 | Qsaltlake.com

light. I did the same thing in Columbia and met with LGBTQ organizations in those countries to really bring information to their mainstream media.

Learning from other trans activists They’ve given me a sense of pride to be a trans Latin woman. I wasn’t really able to be as proud as I am and wouldn’t have been if it weren’t for people like Laverne and Janet, and also that carries over into being a woman. I have a deeper sense of pride, and I want to teach that to people in my own community – to basically want a better quality of life, better protection laws — because that’s what they did for me. In the beginning, when I first came onto the scene, you have to remember I had just started my transition. I was right off of Drag Race, which put me on this super high platform, so it was difficult to focus on myself and develop myself at the same time as being in the news.

How her story can influence other trans people It’s a story about growth and not being afraid to realize that you have to love yourself each and every step of the way.

I can look back at my old Drag Race videos and be like, “What the hell was I thinking?” But that’s who I was, so I’m not gonna really beat up on myself.

Instead, I’m going to love myself each and every step of the process and know that I can follow my gut, and that’s what I really want other young trans people to understand — keep your eye on the prize because when you complete your transition, when you find that place where you’re comfortable, you’re gonna be happy that you took care of yourself and took your time.

The price of living out loud Just me being a trans woman, people don’t take me as seriously as they should.

I read the comments, which I probably shouldn’t, but I do. And it’s a shame, but it’s not my responsibility to change everybody’s mind. You just have to lead by example, you need to put in the work. But it is really difficult for people

to take me seriously considering the fact that they’ve seen me before my transition, they’ve seen me in the middle of my transition, they’ve seen me topless.

I have lived my life out loud for the past six years. Yes, I’m a trans woman, but you know, I can model, I can act, I can be an activist. Little by little, slowly people will begin to understand that and not take me so much as a joke.

Trans experience: Brazil vs. America Brazil is the murder capital of the world for trans people, and many of the people who are suffering feel like they don’t have a voice. I think it comes from lack of knowledge. They don’t really know exactly what is going on. They don’t really know if it’s OK to stand up for themselves and to fight for their rights.

They just go with the flow because they really don’t have any of the resources like here in America. It was really depressing for me, and it was really difficult to wake up knowing that these people are suffering. We have similar experiences, growing up and being kind of closeted about the way you feel and separating yourself and seeking love and validation from the nightlife. Those are all things that I did. It’s like, what makes me any different than them besides location? That’s really the only difference — that they’re there and I’m here. But we’re all existing at the same time.

Continuing to raise awareness of LGBTQ issues internationally I’m working on Venezuela and Chile, and I’m trying to see if I can get either a production company or a network to help take me on the road and explore other cities and other countries and their LGBT laws. Basically, see where we’re at on a global scale. I have a ton of fans in Brazil, so I wanna be able to just continue feeding them the inspiration they need. I mean, if there’s 2.5 million that will show up for a gay pride celebration, I don’t understand why a couple hundred thousand couldn’t show up to demand equal rights or protection laws, so I hope that they take it upon themselves to want better. That’s the whole

point of this show — to put everything in perspective for them so that they can sit, watch it and learn something about the current state of affairs in Brazil. I’m very hopeful that that will spark change.

Next steps: bringing LGBTQ history into the classroom I have two kids at home, age 12 and 8, and they know so much about LGBTQ history. I taught them myself, and they’ve seen my transition and they’ll educate you if you sit down with them and ask them questions. That really inspired me.

I have taken it upon myself to link up with an organization who is helping me create a K–12 curriculum for teaching LGBTQ history in the classrooms. I’m gonna ship that out to every single school in America I possibly can and hope that we can educate our children on our history to help break the stigma and help start the conversation on school grounds and help end bullying and better prepare our youth. Hopefully, that’s gonna spark some change in the future.

It’s a shame everything that is happening with our president, and I know that it might not get any better and we might just have to wait this out. But in the meantime, we can start inspiring our youth to be smarter and stronger and better prepared for the future. Q As editor of Q Syndicate, Chris Azzopardi has interviewed a multitude of superstars, including Meryl Streep, Mariah Carey and Beyoncé. Reach him via his website at chris-azzopardi.com and on Twitter @chrisazzopardi.

42 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | FOOD & DRINK

Qsaltlake.com | issue 267 | May 2017

food & drink

Fireside on Regent Street

BY JOSHUA JONES AND STEVEN FINAU

Opening

a restaurant in Utah is hard. Opening a restaurant on Regent Street, with just occasional bumps in traffic during shows at Eccles is probably terrifying.

Last fall, Steve and I were making dinner plans while enjoying after-work cocktails at Murphy’s when Michael Richey sat near us. I recognized him, but didn’t remember him from his time cooking in the postage stamp-sized kitchen at Pago.

We started talking about food and then about his restaurant to-be on Regent Street. Showing us some interior drawings and menu ideas, the conversation soon turned dark. On top of the normal horrors of opening a restaurant, the shell on the backside of the new Eccles Theatre was

not built to restaurant standards, both plumbing and HVAC systems would need to be upgraded. He even took a phone call during the chat and threatened to pull out all together.

Though a dozen shops are planned for Regent, which recently had a 12-million-dollar makeover, currently Richey’s Fireside is the only light on the street.

That light, however, is bright, and it glows from an Italian-made wood-fired pizza oven that sits behind a beautiful long white-marble bar. The narrow space feels intimate while also exuding a big-city ambiance. It is both beautiful and cosmopolitan, but not at all stuffy. That relaxed feeling is complimented by the staff who seem to love working there and extend warm, gracious service. It all feels very

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adult, without any hipstery-vibe that has accompanied other recent openings.

The menu changes quickly, but one consistent item was the Evergreen pizza ($17) that includes mushrooms, fontina, housemade ricotta, briny-salty alfonzo olives, with garlic oil, and thyme. This is not to be missed, and an example that simplicity with attention to fresh ingredients can escalate a pizza to something unforgettable. It was one of the best pizzas we’ve ever had. That is honesty—no hyperbole!

From the entrees, standouts included a ravioli stuffed with braised rabbit and that delicious house made ricotta, bathing in a consommé garnished with slivered radishes, herbs, and lemon zest ($16). It was light but filling; gamey but bright. Another favorite was a perfectly seared trio of scallops on an island of silky whipped potatoes, imbedded by a mote of beurre fondue — a fancy way to melt butter in water to make it less greasy ($17). Both dishes were decadent.

Fireside is a delight: a wonderful place for those dining alone, quick lunches, or sophisticated group dinners before a show.

It is another gem that adds to Salt Lake’s cachet in the country’s culinary community.

FIRESIDE 126 S Regent Street Mon–Fri 11am to close Sun 11am to close

FOOD & DRINK | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 43

May 2017 | issue 267 | Qsaltlake.com

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Mangiamo!

BY CHUCK TABARACCI

As the

Easter holiday came and went, as with other major holidays, I am reminded of the great family get-togethers of years past.

I grew up in an Italian family. No, it wasn’t the loud Italians you see on Jersey Shore or The Sopranos. Those are Hollywood exaggerations. My grandparents came from northern Italy, Tuscany to be more specific. It’s quite different there than what is characterized on those shows.

Sure, it could get loud at family gatherings, but that was more because of the quantity of people at these events.

Every holiday took place at the house of a different relative. Thanksgiving was always the big dinner, and that one lasted at least an hour or so, and was my personal favorite. The courses of food consisted of both Italian and American dishes, and as a small child, I thought this was normal.

As I got older, I discovered that my family offered much more food than most of the other families cooked.

What wonderful food it was. It began, as all my grandmother’s meals began, with a broth. Serving a broth before dinner is common in Italian households to help fill you up, so you didn’t eat too many solid foods. This is now touted by dietitians as a weight-control method. Who knew Italian grandmothers were so wise? This was followed by a plate of my aunt’s risotto, which was my favorite. She took a variation of the family sauce recipe, a northern Italian brown sauce, and incorporated it into an amazing taste of Nirvana. The smell of this sauce simmering overnight on the stove filled the entire house with the wonderful scents of herbs and spices.

Then came the typical Thanksgiving meal of Turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, and gravy, plus vegetables. Even the stuffing had my grandmother’s Italian touch to it.

During this entire meal grandpa’s wine was on the table. There was a special sec-

tion of his cellar that was a dirt floor just for his wine-making area. He would purchase grapes from a local produce distributor, as would the other Italians in the area.

I remember going there with my dad when he and his brothers would help dump the grapes into the large barrels. There was more talking than work that went on, but it was great spending this time with them.

The musty scent of those wine barrels and the smell of earth permeated the cellar, and I can still recall that after all these years. Nobody in the family remembers what his blend was, and we all regret it.

My aunt told me one day she knew it was a blend of five grapes, but that was all she knew. We also enjoyed the vinegar that was skimmed from the top of the barrels, as this was used for our salad dressing. I don’t remember ever getting store-bought dressing until grandpa was unable to make wine. Grandpa also saved the wooden grape boxes, because that’s what he used to grow his crimini mushrooms. We ate well

—Continued on next page

44 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | A&E

Mangiamo!

Continued from page 43 and healthy in those days — the original version of eating locally.

The other holidays were equally as boisterous, but not nearly the quantity of food. It was a wonderful experience growing up with such a close immigrant family, but during my years in college both of my grandparents and one uncle passed away, and it was about the same time my older cousins began to have children. The various families splintered off to hold holiday celebrations of their own. I felt a bit sad that things weren’t as they had been, but it’s a natural progression amongst most families; as we grow, we leave our respective nests and form traditions of our own.

I still have these memories instilled in my mind like a video that I can play back repeatedly. The smells and tastes of these great foods come alive in my sensory memories every time that I make the family sauce.

After college, I moved to Seattle, and a few years later my younger sister moved to New England. Now I live in Utah, an immigrant to the state. Unlike my immigrant grandparents, I can easily visit my siblings who are only a quick flight away. When I was young, I never thought about what my ancestors went through to come to this country, leaving their families and knowing that they may never see them again.

Unfortunately, it’s too late to tell them in person, but I try to honor them by telling my own children about them and where they came from. Luckily, I was able to take them back to Tuscany several years ago to meet the relatives, and see the houses where their great-grandparents lived before emigrating to America. I can’t imagine why they would want to leave a place so beautiful, but, like most immigrants to this country, I imagine it was for a better life. My grandfather would always say he missed the mountains back home, but we lived next to the Rockies, so that made no sense to me. Until I actually saw the mountains he grew up with, I finally understood why he would miss them.

Living in Utah has made me interested in genealogy, so I have been able to do some tracing of family records, but those only give basic facts. I plan on returning to Italy, visit that small village of Santa Maria del Guidice, and talk with all those family members who remain there to find out more about where I come from. More importantly, I wish to relive and enjoy the ‘la dolce vita’ that I enjoyed so many years ago. Q

Qsaltlake.com | issue 267 | May 2017

BY CHRIS AZZOPARDI

rion Collection, the film’s kitschy ’80s-era color scheme pops with even greater vibrancy. The restored version of Almodóvar’s splendid crossover triumph includes new interviews with Maura, who discusses her recurring acting roles in Almodóvar’s films, and the director himself, musing on the feature’s bold fashion choices and how the movie came to characterize the first decade of his directorial career.

‘Women on the Verge of a Nervous Breakdown’

‘Moonlight’

screen queen ‘Moonlight,’ ‘Valley of the Dolls,’ John Waters’ ‘Multiple Maniacs,’ and More

Perhaps you stumbled onto the acclaimed, queer mind of Spanish auteur Pedro Almodóvar via his latest work, 2016’s Julieta. Or maybe it was his homoerotic melodrama, which involved a gay filmmaker, said filmmaker’s trans sister and a stalker in 1987’s Law of Desire. Or was it the film that earned Penélope Cruz an Oscar nod in 2006, Volver? In any case, Almodóvar’s Hollywood profile got a giant boost in 1988, with Women on the Verge of a Nervous Breakdown, the out director’s defining, Oscar-nominated black comedy.

The campy caper centers on a high-profile actress, Pepa (Carmen Maura), who finds herself saddled with her lady friend’s misadventure — sleeping with terrorists (typical) — while trying to sort out her own man problems. Pepa’s issue is her womanizing boyfriend Iván, responsible for triggering her epic meltdown. How’s this for inspiring: She sets fire to their bed and, in another fit of nostalgic rage, hurls a record out the window like the kind of badass, heartbroken heroine we so love.

Almodóvar’s screwball soap opera shakes out like an acid trip, as its unhinged hijinks are amusingly heightened, while edgy thriller-like camera effects break the comedy-genre mold. And thanks to the Crite-

This year belongs to Moonlight, even if confused Oscar presenter Faye Dunaway wanted us to think otherwise. Writer-director Barry Jenkins’ tender time lapse through three significant periods of lead character Chiron’s Miami-based life explored identity with the poetic ambiance of a Terrence Malick film, and Oscar voters took notice. Moonlight rightly won three statues in February, including Best Adapted Screenplay, which went to Jenkins and Tarell Alvin McCraney, who wrote the autobiographical source material; Best Supporting Actor (Mahershala Ali); and the coveted Best Picture award. The Oscars weren’t wrong, for once (remember 2006, when Crash somehow triumphed over Brokeback Mountain? remember Crash at all?): Moonlight is a raw, harrowing achievement in storytelling and cinematography, which achieves a dreamlike resonance. The drama is marked by its earnest portrayal of the black and queer experience, and the people who make being ourselves that much easier. For Chiron, who’s essentially motherless, his rock is a charismatic and open-minded drug dealer named Juan, played against type with father-figure warmth by Ali. “I got you,” Juan assures in one of the film’s finer scenes, as a weary Chiron takes a metaphorical swim. Later,

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the terrific Trevante Rhodes, playing adult Chiron, has a major breakthrough thanks to Juan, the person who helped nurture his understanding of himself when no one else — not his self-involved mother (a hauntingly good Naomie Harris) or friends at school — would. Jenkins talks about casting local non-actors to cultivate the film’s relatable authenticity during one of the bonus features, which also include a Jenkins commentary, interviews with the noteworthy ensemble and a piece focused on the film’s stunning music.

‘Florence Foster Jenkins’ What’s a “singer” to do if she can’t sing?

Sing anyway. In director Stephen Frears’ Florence Foster Jenkins, those ear-splitting shrieks belong to the titular real-life warbler (played and sung by our favorite “overrated” actress Meryl Streep), whose heart is in the right place — she just wants to help change the lives of World War II soldiers — even if her notes are not. “It is true that a lot of singers my age are on the decline, but I seem to just get better and better,” Florence boasts to her vocal coach (David Haig), unironically, as her earnest husband and manager, St. Clair Bayfield (Hugh Grant), remains stone-faced and her new piano accompanist, Cosmé McMoon (a hysterically expressive Simon Helberg), looks on in horror. People pretend to love Florence, or they’re AARP card-carriers and are unaffected by her squawking howl.

Undue praise leads Florence to believe she’s ready for Carnegie Hall, which means a bigger crowd, actual music critics and, oh no, the possibility that Florence will now discover that her voice is not what she thinks it is. As if this is news to you, Madame Streep owns that screen like only

a diva can, splitting sides with a mangled version of Mozart’s “Queen of the Night” aria and, in a touching coda, moving you with a sweetly delusional dream sequence.

Featurettes are bountiful, but it’s the ever-delightful Streep’s sit-down with costume designer William Ivey Long that stands out amid a look back at Florence’s real-life songs and a history of Carnegie Hall.

Also Out ‘VALLEY OF THE DOLLS’ Valley of the Dolls first threw its drug-infested self onto American audiences in 1967. Had it been 2017, just think of all would-be meme-worthy moments that could be gleaned from failed-actressturned-author Jacqueline Susann’s sordid source material, which was a book before becoming one of the camp genre’s greatest guilty pleasures. The spectacularly bad Patty Duke-starring frolic is a campy cocktail of high-glam Hollywood expose, clashing genres, porn, melodrama and absurdly hysterical one-liners (“Mother, I know I don’t have any talent! And I know all I have is a body, and I am doing my bust exercises!”).

Said frivolity endures now that Criterion has resurrected director Mark Robson’s opulent awfulness for a shiny Blu-ray edition. Included among the plentiful extras are 2001’s dishy TV program Hollywood Backstories, with behind-the-scenes footage of an aged Judy Garland performing her last song for a film.

‘GHOSTBUSTERS’ The same people who probably put Donald Trump in office tore into the all-female Ghostbusters even before its release, which the new take on the 1984 classic derides not just with an “ain’t no bitches gonna hunt no ghosts” joke but simply by existing. Director Paul Feig (Bridesmaids, Spy), who we love because he subverts onscreen gender norms and lets women be the badasses they are, enlists a comedic team so dreamy they should probably just remake every all male-dominated ’80s flick: Melissa McCarthy, Kristen Wiig, Leslie Jones and Kate McKinnon, whose character is probably queer. Their secretary? A nerdy-hot Chris Hemsworth. Even without Hemsworth, who’s hysterical by the way, Ghostbusters is a fun, fresh outing for a new generation of thrill-seeking kids and Trump-era feminists. Among the

extras: a fascinating visual effects comparison piece.

LOOKING: THE COMPLETE SERIES + MOVIE For years, we called on Hollywood to develop a TV series that reflected the “real lives” of gays — so, the complete opposite of Fire Island — and then, in 2014, we got it. But we didn’t watch it, and now it’s gone. This is the sad fate of HBO’s greatly underappreciated and queer-zeitgeist dramedy Looking, about the idiosyncratic lives of an everyday group of gay men living in San Francisco. Jonathan Groff’s Patrick Murray took centerstage as a neurotic preppie, but it was the show’s understatedness that qualifies it — even as writers approached touchy and important topics including serodiscordant couples and PrEP — as one of the most extraordinarily ordinary portrayals of queer life.

The gone-too-soon series at least got a respectable final bow with a full-length, wedding-centric movie that honored Looking and its characters with sophisticated storytelling and a poignant last shot. Cast episode commentaries are included.

MULTIPLE MANIACS Even John Waters is appalled by Multiple Maniacs — his own movie, mind you.

During a 2016 commentary for a newly Criterion-restored version of the black comedy, Waters is his typically amusing, filterless self as he discusses a wide-range of tidbits regarding his 1970 black-andwhite film, an exploitative DIY feature produced on a shoestring budget and filmed with a chummy group of self-proclaimed “freaks.” Late drag icon Divine leads the shenanigans with a fetish show called The Cavalcade of Perversion, which spotlights “two actual queers kissing each other like lovers on the lips” and a resident “puke eater.” That’s just child’s play, because then Divine robs and murders her weirded-out patrons while also partaking in rosary buttplay at a Catholic church with Waters film-mainstay Mink Stole.

The shockfest was, essentially, the beginning of a decades-long legacy for one of cinema’s filthiest forefathers. Stole, along with other Multiple Maniacs actors, speak at length about working with Divine and Waters on a movie that Waters says he’s glad his mother never saw. Q As editor of Q Syndicate, Chris Azzopardi has interviewed a multitude of superstars, including Meryl Streep, Mariah Carey and Beyonce. Reach him via his website at chris-azzopardi.com and on Twitter @chrisazzopardi.

46 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | COMICS

Qsaltlake.com | issue 267 | May 2017

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Qsaltlake.com | issue 267 | May 2017

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‘This Is How It Always Is’

by Laurie Frankel c.2017, Flatiron Books $25.99 / 329 pages You must not tell.

You cannot breathe a word to anyone who doesn’t already know. That Which Cannot Be Spoken must remain buried, put away, frozen, lips sealed, or in the closet. You cannot tell because, as in the new novel “This Is How It Always Is” by Laurie Frankel, secrets change everything.

In the beginning was Roosevelt, known to his loved ones as Roo. Not long after he was born, Ben entered the family. Then the twins, Orion and Rigel, arrived and so Rosie Walsh, still hoping for a girl baby, did everything the Talmud recommended she do next. Months later, she and her husband, Penn, welcomed… Claude.

And that was okay. Another boy in their raucous, rowdy family of boys was fine and Rosie and Penn loved them all. They were happy in their big, rambling, open farmhouse just outside of Madison, Wisconsin. Rosie loved her job. Penn worked on his novel. And Claude dreamed of being a girl.

It started when, as do most parents, Rosie told Claude that he could “be anything” he wanted to be someday.

Claude was three years old and loved dress-up; it didn’t seem odd to let him wear dresses at home. But soon, home wasn’t enough and Claude tantrumed until he was allowed to wear dresses to preschool, though he was told that he’d have to use the nurse’s station bathroom and his teacher was “not happy.”

Still, Rosie and Penn were willing to do what it took to make Claude feel secure.

With his dresses and pink, he

was a confident child; without, he was sullen and sad.

None of his classmates minded his clothing. His brothers never gave it a second thought.

Claude was simply Claude, until he asked his parents to call him Poppy.

And that was fine, too, especially when the family moved to another state and it was easier to keep quiet — until it wasn’t. Until Poppy started growing up, the world became a vicious place, and secret-keeping couldn’t last forever.

And so, here’s the thing: once you’ve started reading “This Is How It Always Is,” you might as well just clear your schedule. Cancel all appointments. You won’t want to do anything but read, so just give in. Blame it on the book.

Part of the appeal, I think, is in the way that author Laurie Frankel writes: there are no airs, no try-to-impress-you words, nothing uppity. Her characters are normal people with everyday lives, trying to maintain that normalcy and Frankel writes like they might talk: with down-to-earth matter-of-factness and a fast dash of humor that winds its way through a serious topic.

And on that topic, you’ve perhaps heard it before (or something similar) but not in a voice like this, and not quite as enjoyable.

One more thing: be sure to read Frankel’s after-notes, which brings her novel full-circle and will make you smile. But don’t peek; instead, start “This Is How It Always Is” from the beginning and savor it properly. It’ll make you want to tell everyone. Q

A&E | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 49

May 2017 | issue 267 | Qsaltlake.com

mr. manners

Money Wise

BY ROCK MAGEN

Although

I have chosen to pursue a career in finance, I try to keep the talk of financial matters to a minimum.

However, those who know me best know that sometimes my passion for the nuances associated with money occasionally get the better of me. If I am not careful, I can quickly find myself searching for a pen and paper to begin giving a full-on Ivy League lecture. I assure you that will not be the case today, but I do want to take some time to impart just a few words of wisdom.

The first rule to any good strategy is to have a plan.

Would you start a new diet or gym routine without first knowing your weight or where you want to be? I would hope not! So you begin any sort of financial endeavor by knowing your net worth. Here comes the brief “lecture” portion of the article: your net worth boils down to your assets minus liabilities. Taking the MBA talk out of it, it translates to “what you own minus what you owe.”

Start there, and determine are you where you want to be at the moment financially. If you are, great! If not, it may be time to start saving more.

I like to think of saving in two forms: long term and short term. Short term savings is the money you budget to save each month. The best way to ensure you save is to set up automatic payments into your savings account. I think it’s brilliant when an employer lets you

direct deposit your paycheck into multiple accounts. If you can do that, start by estimating how much you could save each month and then have that amount direct deposited into a savings account.

Long term savings tends to come in the form of a 401(K) or other retirement accounts. If you are lucky enough to have an employer-sponsored plan and they match your contributions, you need to be taking advantage of that money. With a match, depending on the plan, they typically match you dollar-for-dollar up to a certain percent. For example, if your employer matches five percent, then you need to be putting at least five percent of your paycheck into that account to get the full match. If that five percent is $100, then the employer would put in another $100, making $200 in the account for that pay period!

It’s the best way to double your money with a very low risk.

As promised, I am keeping it to only a few brief words of wisdom, however, if you do have any additional questions maybe it’s time you got serious about your financial health.

There are many great resources available to help you and often many time many of them are free. Will Rogers said, “Too many people spend money they haven’t earned, to buy things they don’t want, to impress people they don’t like.” It’s time to make sure you are not one of those people!

Rainbow Flag

49 “Fast,” to Leonard Bernstein ACROSS 51 Follower of James 1 The Oscars, and Buchanan, familiarly others 53 Official song of the 6 “Woe ___!” (Hamlet) rainbow flag?

10 Greek war deity 55 Fruit desserts 14 City of Lorca’s home- 57 Emma Donoghue’s land country 15 The Boys in the Band, 58 Colors hair in 1968 62 “I’ve had better...”

16 Ward of Once and 63 Official beverage of Again the rainbow flag?

17 Official dessert of 65 “No” to someone the rainbow flag? who is “lesbisch” 19 Ginsberg’s “Gotcha” 66 Bear overhead 20 One-named designer 67 Treats meat 21 Pennsylvania city 68 Marine flyer 22 Lake site of a gay and 69 Rosie Jones supportlesbian ski week ers 23 Official band of the 70 Begins, as a Broadway rainbow flag? play 26 Heteros, on PlanetDOWN Out? 1 Ironically straight 27 Brand for covering singer Marvin your bottom 2 State with certainty 30 List-maker Schindler 3 Gay tune 32 Home of the Buck 4 Claim eyes 5 Saint, in Rio 33 “Thou shalt not covet 6 Len Deighton’s The thy neighbor’s ___” ___ File 34 Six Feet Under auto 7 Like Harvey Milk in 37 Queen, to a dealer 1978 39 San Francisco’s Nob 8 Get by barely ___ 9 Queer body part on 40 Building managers TV 43 Sixth notes in “Do10 Continent of MargaRe-Mi” ret Cho’s parents 11 Official seafood 46 Fourth book of the entree of the rainbow OT flag?

47 What some are doing 12 She’s George in bed

13 Wise guys 18 TV show with Isabelle 22 Little biker in a gay pride march 24 Cell stuff, for short 25 It hangs from your butt 27 George O’Malley, et al.

28 Birthright seller of the Bible 29 The other official song of the rainbow flag?

31 Mouth-open-wide sound 35 Sling mud at 36 Muppet pal of Rosie 38 Laurie Partridge portrayer Susan 41 Ridges on condoms 42 Trump-mocking comedy 43 Thin plates 44 “___ Comes Mary” (The Association, ’66) 45 “Reduce Speed”, on a sign 48 Bonheur’s war 50 With butts in the air?

51 Make up (for) 52 Rainbow flag designer Gilbert 54 Use a rubber 56 Timothy Daly’s sister 59 Time of Camelot 60 Genie portrayer Barbara 61 Abuse orally 63 Glossy gay magazine 64 Logical beginning

50 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | MARKETPLACE

marketplace

Qsaltlake.com | issue 267 | May 2017

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MARKETPLACE | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 51

May 2017 | issue 267 | Qsaltlake.com

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52 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | PETS

Qsaltlake.com | issue 267 | May 2017

Each Sudoku puzzle has a unique solution which can be reached logically without guessing. Enter digits 1 through 9 into the blank spaces. Every row must contain one of each digit, as must each column and each 3x3 square. Qdoku

Q doku Level: Medium

7 4 6

2 4

1

1 7 5 8 3

4 3 4 1

5 9 2 2

5 6

7

1

7 8 1 3 4

4

3

7 2 8 9

2 8 6

2

3

4

1

7

3 5

9 1 8

9 6 6 8 4 3

5 2 1 6 4 1 7 4 7 8 9 3 4 5 6 5 9 7 7 4 8 4 3 1

4 7

6

q scopes MAY

BY SAM KELLEY-MILLS

ARIES March 20–April 19

A failure in communication with a friend can cause some problems.

Remember that we are all human, and the failings of others are mistakes, not assaults. More likely than not, a friends carefree attitude is simply their way of dealing with their problems. Take a moment to do the same and simply chill out for a bit.

TAURUS Apr 20–May 20 Constant nagging from someone is getting on your nerves.

While it may not actually be so bad, the constant pressure is getting you down.

Take some time to simply get away and find a sense of normal again. Rest in a place where the mind can reset. Your personal matters and career can wait.

Work on yourself now.

GEMINI May 21–June 20 The beauty of nature is going to be a great inspirational source during this time period. With weather that is ever changing and a hot-and-cold dynamic occurring, much of your duality

9

7 5 1 4 2

3

2

4 9

6

CL ASS OF 2017

SO BEST PER NALITY This May, adopt a pet 5 years or older for just $10.

8

6 8 2 1 7 5 1

2 3 9

8

3 6 9 5 7

1 5 6 5 7 2 7

2 5

4 2

Best Friends Pet Adoption Center 2005 S. 1100 E., Salt Lake City bestfriendsutah.org

6

is represented by the world itself. This could be a good time to be involved with the creative process and share what you see with others.

CANCER June 21–July 22 Feeling that things could be going better right now? Likely this feeling comes from boredom rather than failure. There is always a higher conquest and a goal to accomplish, but only because you want more than you have. Look for some new adventures but don’t lose sight of how good things are right now either.

LEO July 23–August 22 There’s nothing totally wrong in switching up the orders of operations. The more tasks are piling up, the more boredom tends to set in. Keep things interesting by having dessert first, play before work, and taking different positions than normal. It’s a good time to break the norms and alter perceptions for the better.

VIRGO August 23–Sep. 22 The need to flex the muscle of authority could be a turn off to others. Don’t be so impressed by your accomplishments that it undermines the efforts to gain respect. A friend or lover is finding an obsession rather weary, but don’t let this get you down. Find satisfac-

tion through casual fun and lay off the need to prove yourself.

LIBRA Sept 23–October 22 Follow through on tasks that have fallen behind. The saying, “better late than never” can be applied in many ways, whether it be business or the bedroom. Communication has fallen by the wayside, and there is a lot of confusion surrounding your recent actions. Rest assured others will listen, so explain.

some letdown is possible.

CAPRICORN Dec 21–Jan 19 A fellowship of friends and lovers is going to lead to nice times. Enjoy what you can and do your best to stay safe. There could be drama, but that is to be expected. No one is trying to bring you down, despite some suggestions. Allow good feelings to be channeled into the work you are doing.

It never hurts to feel inspired.

SCORPIO Oct. 23–Nov. 21 It’s getting warmer and so is your temperature, Scorpio! It may seem like a prime time to get out there and look for adventure. Stay out of danger by keeping close to those you know, and don’t travel far from home. The ability to control emotional responses may be compromised, especially regarding personal interactions.

AQUARIUS Jan. 20–Feb. 18 Whatever is troubling you is likely to affect others if not kept in check. The worst thing you can do is spread negativity, which has a tendency to bounce back. The best course of action is to take a submissive role and allow others to show what it really means to be happy. Realize that sometimes the best action is no action.

SAGITTARIUS Nov. 22–December 20.

No is going to desert you at this time, despite a few moments of despair. Stay focused on working on yourself and become your own pleaser.

Fate has a way of bringing tragedy in threes, and you’ve already received two in a row. While this may not be quite obvious to some of you, rest assured

PISCES Feb 19–Mar 19 During what is turning out to be a lull period, spend time gaining focus. Get involved with projects and meet with people you’ve been putting off for a while. Someone may challenge your opinions in a seemingly offensive manner but don’t take it too hard. It has more to do with a competitive need than discrediting your ideas. Q

May 2017 | issue 267 | Qsaltlake.com

Pet of the Month

Off-Leash Dog Parks

NEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 53

magazine qsaltlake.com

MEMORY GROVE OFF LEASH ➋ AREA AT FREEDOM TRAIL COTTONWOOD PARK ➏ ➑ 1580 W 300 N

PIONEER PARK ➏

375 N CANYON RD

➎ LINDSEY GARDENS DOG PARK 9TH AVE AND M STREET

380 S 300 W

JORDAN DOG PARK ➏ 1060 S 900 W

➌ HERMAN FRANKS PARK 750 E 1300 S

PARLEY’S NATURE PRESERVE ➊ (TANNER PARK) 2740 S 2700 E

MILLRACE OFF-LEASH DOG PARK ➐ 1200 W 5400 S

WEST JORDAN OFF-LEASH ➍ DOG PARK

TYPICAL DOG PARK RULES • Current license and rabies tag • Human companions clean up waste • Damage to landscape prohibited • Aggressive dogs prohibited • No chasing or harassing wildlife • Swimming in authorized areas only • Dogs under 4 months prohibited • Dogs off leash in posted areas only

5982 W NEW BINGHAM HWY

ROY CITY DOG PARK 5700 S 3260 W, ROY

OGDEN CITY DOG PARK 2450 SOUTH A ST, OGDEN

SOUTH OGDEN DOG PARK

4150 SOUTH PALMER DR, OGDEN

King James 7 years old Male domestic shorthair Brown and white tabby Can I be your best friend? I’m so affectionate and want to spend all my time with you! I can get lonely and would prefer a home where someone is around for me to talk to and cuddle with. I can live with other pets as long as they are mellow and nice to me. I would prefer a home with adults and older children because younger children scare me! My back end is very sensitive so please don’t pet me there. I am ready to go home with you — all I require is lots of love and a warm blanket we can share!

For more information, go to Best Friends Animal Society — Utah, 2005 S 1100 East, or call 801-574-2454 or go to bestfriendsutah.org

JC SNOW DOG PARK

900 S 400 E, ST GEORGE

SPONSORED BY:

➍ SANDY DOG PARK 9980 S 300 E

54 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | QMMUNITY

Utah Log Cabin Republicans  bit.ly/logcabinutah 801-657-9611 Utah Stonewall Democrats  utahstonewalldemocrats.org RELIGIOUS

First Baptist Church  firstbaptist-slc.org * office@firstbaptistslc.org 11a Sundays 777 S 1300 E 801-582-4921

SPORTS

Lambda Hiking Club  gayhike.org Pride Community Softball League  prideleague.com  pcsl@prideleague.com Q Kickball League  qkickball.com Sundays, 10:30, 11:30, Sunnyside Park QUAC — Queer Utah Aquatic Club  quacquac.org  questions@ quacquac.org Salt Lake Goodtime Bowling League  bit.ly/slgoodtime Stonewall Shooting Sports of Utah  fb.me/stonewall.

PUZZLE SOLUTIONS

4 9 2 8 6 7 1 3 5

8 3 5 9 4 6 7 2 1 5 4 6 8 3 9 7 4 2 5 1 6

2 7 9 1 3 5 8 4 6 1 9 3 5 2 7 6 3 1 9 8 4

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a service project to bring Easter breakfast to the less fortunate.

On the following Tuesday they joined the Burrito Project rolling burritos for delivery to The Road Home and other homeless shelters and parks in the Salt Lake area. They also helped deliver some of the burritos once they were made. They meet the first and third Mondays of the month at First Baptist Church at 6:30 p.m.

7 9 8 5 6 3 1 4 2

Gay Men Aloud joined with First Baptist Church in

sportsofutah Venture Out Utah  fb.me/groups/ Venture.OUT.Utah YOUTH/COLLEGE

Gay-Straight Alliance Network  gsanetwork.org Salt Lake Community College Equality Involvement Club 8 facebook.com/slcc. equality University of Utah LGBT Resource Center 8 lgbt.utah.edu 200 S Central Campus Dr Rm 409 801-587-7973 Univ. of Utah Queer Student Union utahqsu@gmail.com USGA at BYU  byuusga.wordpress.com  fb.co/UsgaAtByu Utah State Univ. Access & Diversity Ctr  usu.edu/ accesscenter/lgbtqa Utah Valley Univ Spectrum  discord.me/ spectrumatuvu  facebook.com/ groups/uvuspectrum Weber State Univ Faculty/Staff GayStraight Alliance  organizations.weber. edu/fsgsa  fsgsa@weber.edu Weber State University LGBT Resource Center  weber.edu/ lgbtresourcecenter 3885 W Campus Dr, Student Services Ctr, Suite 154 Dept. 2125 801-626-7271

CRYPTOGRAM: I HOPE THAT THE CURRENT ADMINISTRATION LIVES UP TO THE PROMISES IT HAS MADE TO ADVANCE HUMAN RIGHTS FOR EVERYONE

BY RAISING THIS ISSUE DIRECTLY WITH RUSSIA’S LEADERS.

ANAGRAM: JOE BIDEN

5 8 7 3 9 1 2 6 4

Utah Libertarian Party 6885 S State St #200 888-957-8824

3 1 6 2 5 4 9 8 7

Equality Utah  equalityutah.org * info@equalityutah.org 175 W 200 S, Ste 1004 801-355-3479

1 to 5 Club (bisexual)  fb.me/ 1to5ClubUtah Alternative Garden Club  bit.ly/altgarden * altgardenclub@gmail.com blackBOARD Men’s Kink/Sex/BDSM education First & Third Mondays  blackbootsslc.org blackBOOTS Kink/BDSM Men’s leather/kink/ fetish/BDSM)  blackbootsslc.org Gay Writes writing group, DiverseCity 6:30 pm Mondays Community Writing Ctr, 210 E 400 S Ste 8 Get Outside Utah  bit.ly/GetOutsideUtah Men Who Move  menwhomove.org OUTreach Utah  outreachutah.org Ogden, 3350 Harrison, 2nd, 4th Weds, 4-6pm Logan, 596 E 900 N — Fri, 4:30-7:30pm qVinum Wine Tasting  qvinum.com Rainbow Classic Car Don R. Austin 801-485-9225

1 6 8 5 7 3 4 9 2

POLITICAL

SOCIAL

9 2 4 6 1 8 5 7 3

801-359-5545

7 5 3 4 2 9 6 1 8

Young Women’s

2 1 6 4 9 7 8 3 5

801-433-1713

Sage Utah  fb.me/sageutah  sageutah@ utahpridecenter.org 801-557-9203 Temple Squares Square Dance Club  templesquares.org Weekly dances every other Thurs 7p at UPC 801-449-1293 Utah Bears  utahbears.com  fb.me/ utahbears  info@utahbears.com Weds 6pm Raw Bean Coffee, 611 W Temple Utah Male Naturists  umen.org  info@umen.org Utah Pride Center  utahpridecenter.org  thecenter@ utahpridecenter.org 255 E 400 S 801-539-8800

3 4 5 2 1 8 6 9 7

HEALTH & HIV

Northern Utah HIV/ AIDS Project Walk-Ins Tues Noon–5pm 536 24th St, Ste 2B, Ogden 801-393-4153 Peer Support for Mental Illness — PSMI Fridays, 6pm at Utah Pride Ctr, 255 E 400 S Planned Parenthood 654 S 900 E 800-230-PLAN Salt Lake Valley Health Dept HIV/STD Clinic 610 S 200 E 801-534-4666 Utah AIDS Foundation  utahaids.org * mail@utahaids.org 1408 S 1100 E 801-487-2323

Young Men’s Transition Home

Sacred Light of Christ  slcchurch.org 823 S 600 E 801-595-0052 11a Sundays Wasatch Metropolitan Community Church  wasatchmcc.org 801-889-8764 Sundays, 11a at UPC

4 7 1 9 2 5 3 6 8

BUSINESS

LGBTQ-Affirmative Psycho-therapists Guild of Utah  lgbtqtherapists.com * jim@lgbtqtherapists.com

DOMESTIC VIOLENCE

National Domestic Violence Hotline 1-800-799-7233 YWCA of Salt Lake  ywca.org/saltlakecity 322 E 300 S 801-537-8600

HOMELESS SVCS

Volunteers of America Homeless Youth Resource Ctr, ages 15–21 880 S 400 W 801-364-0744

6 8 3 1 7 4 2 5 9

ALCOHOL & DRUG

Alcoholics Anonymous 801-484-7871  utahaa.org Gay and Lesbianspecific meetings: Sundays 3p Acceptance Group, UPC, 255 E 400 S Mondays 7p Gay Men’s Stag (Big Book Study), UPC, 255 E 400 S 8p G/Q Women’s Mtg, Disability Law Center (rear), 205 N 400 W Tuesday 8:15p Live & Let Live, UPC, 255 E 400 S Wednesday 7p Sober Today, 375 Harrison Blvd, Ogden Friday 8p Stonewall Group, UPC, 255 E 400 S Crystal Meth Anon crystalmeth.org Thursday 1:30p Unity In Sobriety, UPC, 255 E 400 S

Utah Gay & Lesbian Chamber of Commerce  utahgaychamber.com * info@utahgaychamber.com Vest Pocket Business Coalition  vestpocket.org 801-596-8977

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Qmmunity Groups

Qsaltlake.com | issue 267 | May 2017

HEALTH | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 55

May 2017 | issue 267 | Qsaltlake.com

positive thoughts

Youth in Action Gabriel

BY ORIOL R. GUTIERREZ JR.

Maldonado and a group of youth activists founded TruEvolution, an AIDS service organization in Riverside, Calif. which works with highrisk youth populations.

In recent years, TruEvolution has addressed the social factors that negatively affect the health of LGBT youth, such as homelessness, social displacement and homophobia. The group engages in community organizing efforts and prevention services and seeks to improve access to care for youth living with HIV. Its ultimate goal is to create a youth-driven movement promoting health equity, racial justice and gender and sexual equality for all underserved youth in the Inland Empire region.

As a 27-year-old Afro-Latino gay man living with HIV who has a master’s degree in business administration, Maldonado applies his personal and professional experiences to his advocacy. He has served on the AIDS Healthcare Foundation board of directors and the advisory boards of Janssen Pharmaceuticals and ViiV Healthcare.

He was a POZ 100 honoree in

2014, which was the year the list focused on youth. He is a member of the Presidential Advisory Council on HIV/AIDS (PACHA), serving as cochair of the disparities committee.

Tell us about the evolution of your organization. We started as a human rights organization and still call ourselves a human rights organization. We found that there were a lot of social inequities and injustices that were being experienced by LGBT youth in Riverside and San Bernardino, two of the most conservative counties in California.

We started working in high schools to address things like bullying and discriminatory policies. We worked closely with school districts on implementing inclusive transgender restroom policies. As we started to focus more on LGBT youth of color, HIV/AIDS became a major topic for us.

We worked more on sexual health education and resource referral. We then started linkage to care. Now, as a Ryan White–funded agency, we provide services that include testing for HIV, hepatitis C and

syphilis. We also do very light, nonmedical case management.

Our advocacy now includes a lot of work with public officials, both at the county and city levels, to create policies that meet the needs of vulnerable key populations disproportionately affected by HIV/AIDS, which includes LGBT youth, men of color who have sex with men and trans women of color.

state lines for job opportunities and social spaces.

Further, we need to provide youth with sexual health education, specifically healthcare literacy, which I am really passionate about. Youth have to be able to understand their healthcare system and the jargon used in navigating the system, which is overwhelming and can be a real barrier.

For 2017 and beyond, what are some of your advocacy and policy priorities? We have to be mindful about the future of our healthcare system, especially the Affordable Care Act. That is the priority that should be on all our plates, particularly for people living with HIV. If our services decrease – even an iota – that could mean life or death for some of us.

People are still dying from this virus, particularly because sometimes they are not aware of their status or stigma prohibits them from engaging in care. We need to make sure that the apparatus that we worked really hard to create over the past 30 years remains in place for dealing with HIV. We also need to deal with highly transient youth. The majority of youth I work with are not originally from this community. Primarily, they moved here because we have some of the most affordable housing in the state. They are not only moving between counties but also from across

In the aftermath of the 2016 election, how does HIV/AIDS advocacy move forward? How can youth play a role? Everybody has different strategies and approaches. I don’t necessarily think one strategy is better than another. My personal strategy that we use here at the local level has been to decentralize the movement, which is very counter to what the movement has become since the beginning of the epidemic.

More of a grassroots approach is where we need to go.

We need to engage with our city and state officials. The Trump administration is looking to give more power to the states, which means that we’re going to see an expansion of the role that state and local governments play in healthcare. Let’s take fewer flights to DC and more flights to state capitals like Sacramento and Albany. Q The full interview is available at gaysaltlake.com

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56 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | Q&A

Qsaltlake.com | issue 267 | May 2017

Somewhere Over the (Randy) Rainbow

BY CHRIS AZZOPARDI

If laughter

really is the best medicine, political satirist Randy Rainbow just might be your Prozac for the next four years. His buzzy, self-produced video parodies, from last year’s Clinton vs. Trump debates to a recent poke at presidential counselor Kellyanne Conway’s claim about recording-capable microwave ovens, can’t change that we have an imbecile playing president — but they sure as hell ease some of the pain.

As the South Florida native, who now lives in New York, likes to say, “It’s terrible for our country, but fabulous for my career.” (And, clearly, for the rest of us.)

The current administration’s embarrassing disregard for the truth (#Bowl-

ingGreenMassacre) and endless parade of senseless spewing has done wonders for Rainbow’s rising visibility as a comedian, singer and theater performer. Below his video titled “Alternative Facts,” which Rainbow turned into a jingle to the tune of “Jellicle Cats” from Broadway’s Cats, the lead comment reads, “The only good thing from this hellish election cycle was discovering this channel.”

Rainbow’s channel launched in 2010 with videos of him phoning imaginary boyfriends such as Kirk Cameron, Mel Gibson and Charlie Sheen. Later came the “GOP Dropout” series, which targeted the likes of Marco Rubio and Ben Carson. Then, in 2016, he turned to the presidential primaries, and when “the shit hit the fan with this election,” he says, “is when I started really seeing the numbers and getting the feedback I’ve always wanted.”

In a new interview, Rainbow shared some non-fake news about the reality of his party-bridging political rebukes — and why they just may be the kind of unifying breakthrough this country needs.

With a name like Randy Rainbow, you were born to be a star, right? Well, I mean, I had to do something!

I couldn’t be a football player with that fuckin’ name, that’s for sure. It’s worked out now for me, but it was a very difficult childhood, I’ll say that. I’m kind of joking, but it’s just

kind of lucky that I turned out to be a gay comedian and entertainer with that name; otherwise, I don’t know what would’ve happened. Back before all that was going on, it was just me and my name, and I was just some awkward gay kid named Randy Rainbow in high school.

With your videos, what do you think you’ve tapped into that people are seeking right now? Any excuse to laugh at this nightmare is welcome (laughs) – I think that has a lot to do with it! It’s an important thing to laugh at, because it can be scary sometimes if people really are drawn to it.

At first, it seemed just gay people were posting your material. But then, I was seeing straight friends post your videos, which must mean you’ve made it. Yeah, I’m mainstream now! You know how I know I’ve made it?

I sell T-shirts on my website, and my mom will wear them to the gym and people will go up to her and say, “Oh, I love him too!”

On a first date, how do you describe your career to someone? I go through a whole list of things, because I still don’t know exactly what to call it. But, first, I say I’m a comedian, and then I say… it’s so obnoxious, what am I gonna say? “Internet sensation”?

That’s obnoxious!

“YouTube celebrity”? I never liked YouTube celebrity. First of all, my numbers are bigger on Facebook, but I’m certainly not gonna say I’m a “Facebook celebrity.”

Internet sensation is what I say when I have to categorize it, but first and foremost I’m a comedian and performer and writer.

My whole Grindr feed is people knowing who I am now: “Oh my god, are you really Randy Rainbow?”

What’s your background as a comedian, performer and writer? I’ve been on the stage since I was a little kid. I started in ballet when I was 6; it went from that to musical theater. Musical theater was mostly my background. Theater, camp and regional theater all through childhood and high school and a little bit in college, and then I dropped out of college and worked on a cruise ship and sang a little. So, mainly musical theater was my first love and what my background is in, and then then I started writing.

Once I moved to New York, I started developing my comedic voice and, a few years after, put the two

Q&A | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 57

May 2017 | issue 267 | Qsaltlake.com

together and that’s how I came up with all this.

How different is your comedic voice from your everyday persona? Do people expect you to be the Randy Rainbow they see on the internet? Sometimes.

I guess everyone who is a comedian goes through that.

Anyone who does anything funny has to deal with inevitably disappointing people in person. But I would say that my comedian persona is kind of a heightened reality of my real persona — maybe me after a couple of drinks.

When did you know that you wanted to make parody videos? I’ve had a couple web series on BroadwayWorld.com, which came from them knowing about my first videos that went a little viral that were always hot-topic stuff like Mel Gibson when his (ex-girlfriend tirade) tapes were released six years. I figured it was a good place to sneak in my musical chops a bit. I started with the musical stuff, and that led to Kim Davis (the Kentucky county clerk who refused to issue marriage licenses to samesex couples) over a year ago when I did “Cell Block Tango” and it got, like, 4 million views, so I was like, “This is working.”

What is your most viral video at this point?

It’s still [the first 2016 presidential debate parody] “Braggadocious,” with 30 million views on Facebook.

You recently wrote new lyrics for a parody of “Officer Krupke” for the cast of Will & Grace. Might you be involved in the forthcoming Will & Grace reboot? I hope! I don’t have any news yet, but I’ve heard from the whole cast — I know they’re fans – and I’ve actually heard from [series co-creator] Max Mutchnick who said they’re

fans and he’d love to speak, so we’re kind of setting that up. It didn’t sound like [he had] any particular agenda, but if there’s any fucking way that I can be a part of that, that would be a dream come true, absolutely.

What is your process for making a parody? Sometimes it’s just wordplay, like the “Braggadocious” thing, for instance.

Sometimes it’s as simple as that. I’m a big show queen – no surprise! – so sometimes it’s a situational thing. When Kim Davis was in jail, immediately I thought “Cell Block Tango.”

Now, I have a nice, big following, so sometimes I’ll take suggestions.

Do you think you’re gonna keep on the political streak you’re on? My thing has always been the hot topics, so right now, what else is everyone talking about but that? Certainly, I’m known for it now, so I’ll keep doing it as long as it’s necessary and as long as there’s material.

At this point, I don’t see it dwindling... unfortunately, for America.

I’m making some legitimate money on my YouTube channel now, so I can devote more time to my own stuff. And I’m traveling a little bit now and I’m booked all through gay pride all over the country. I’m doing gay prides. I’ll eventually have a calendar assembled on my website, but it’s coming together now. I’m doing PrideFest Milwaukee, I did Tampa Pride, so that pays.

How does your work translate to a pride event stage? I’ve done a couple of live shows. I did Birdland here in New York twice, and it depends on what the gig is. But I’ll show some videos, and it’ll be a little stand up and then I do the parody songs live.

My hit singles.

So a lot like Mariah’s Vegas No. 1s show? (Laughs) I will be singing live, though.

How did comedy impact you as somebody who was young and dealing with being gay? I consider myself lucky that I kind of fell into this role that I’m in now because everyone is up in arms, and understandably. But I get to be up in arms and make jokes and showtunes and that always helps.

When I hear from people, it’s not just, “Hey, that was a funny video.” I’m getting a lot of, “Thank you, that was so necessary.” People are so grateful for comedy and for escapism now, and I realize what I’m doing is just taking two primary tools that I always used growing up as an awkward gay kid who was kind of an outsider, which, for me, was

always musicals and comedy – those are the two things that always make me feel good and (help me) get through shit – and I’m just using those tools now. I’m happy that I’m able to use them to make other people feel good.

Do you think you’re reaching people through comedy who may otherwise be resistant to hearing your side of the story? I think, absolutely. I hear from more people on the other side of the fence who say, “We don’t agree and I’m a Trump supporter, but you made me laugh.” I think that’s the thing about comedy: the root of comedy is truth, and so because of that, it’s unifying. I think comedy is the ultimate unifier. Q Chris Azzopardi is the editor of Q Syndicate. Reach him via his website at www. chris-azzopardi.com and on Twitter @chrisazzopardi.

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58 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | HOLLYWOOD

Qsaltlake.com | issue 267 | May 2017

deep inside hollywood

BY ROMEO SAN VICENTE

‘What happens at The Abbey?’

It looks like the usual.

Move over Fire Island — a show that hasn’t even aired yet but now has to move over, anyway — because there’s another queerthemed reality series ready to be a very bad influence on your summer viewing habits. It’s called What Happens at The Abbey. It is not about a monastery. It is, however, about an exceptionally popular gay bar/restaurant in West Hollywood that happens to be located right next door to Pump, the place you all know and hate-

love from Vanderpump Rules. Lots of really pretty people work at the Abbey — the one thing they all have in common — and their respective sexualities, genders and races run the gamut, so a good variety of attractive couplings are sampled in the show’s preview trailer. Expect sex, screaming and very little sobriety (a disembodied voice yells “Penis!” in the trailer, so that’s promising). And if the show doesn’t deliver healthy amounts of all three, then we’re going to be bored fast. It premieres on E! Sunday May 4.

The ‘Claws’ come out We already miss Big Little Lies. And Feud will nearly be over by the time you read this. So now that we’re hooked on TV featuring female-driven misdeeds, where are we supposed to go next for a dose of bad behavior? Luckily, it’s TNT to the rescue with Claws. Set in a Florida nail salon staffed by a group of women who seem predisposed to setting it off, the show stars Niecy Nash, Judy Reyes (Devious Maids), Carrie Preston (The Good Wife), Jenn Lyon (­), and Karrueche Tran (The Nice Guys) as manicurists who find themselves involved in crime, murder and arson — you know, Florida stuff. We assume there will be adult language, adult situations, violence and nudity, all the TV-MA qualities we crave the most. But if not, at least there will be Nash, a woman we would follow off a cliff, Thelma & Louise-style, if she demanded it. Claws premieres June 11, and to get in the mood we’re going to go commit some victimless crimes and see if we like it.

Claire Danes, Jim Parsons and ‘A Kid Called Jake’ We’re always rooting for transgender stories and creators, and we’re cheerleading hard right now for Transparent’s Silas Howard — one of Hollywood’s few trans directors — and his new project, A Kid Called Jake. The feature film, adapted from a Lincoln Center play by Daniel Pearle, will star Claire Danes and Jim Parsons as a married couple with a transgender child.

Their 4-year-old, Jake, prefers to dress up and play princess rather than as male-identified fantasy heroes, and it’s up to the parents to sort out a response that will allow their little one to thrive. The film is in pre-production now, and it couldn’t be timelier, as the current presidential administration’s cruel anti-LGBT platform has already started attacking trans children by rolling back public school restroom policies that would allow children to use the one that corresponds to their gen-

May 2017 | issue 267 | Qsaltlake.com

der identity. In other words we’re primed for a little art as activism, especially if it makes Republicans lose their minds.

Queer seniors are making ‘Christmas’ Every time a tween, teen or Millennial star comes out in Hollywood, our heart grows three sizes, because they’ll never have to worry about the celebrity closet. But there’s a special place in our formerly shrunken hearts for the senior queer actors who blazed the trail, and we especially love British character actors Simon Callow (A Room With a View — he was the skinny-dipping vicar) and Miriam Margolyes (you know her best as Professor Sprout in the Harry Potter films). They’ve both been out forever, working for nearly as long, and we adore them.

They’re the kind of people that we scan IMDB credits for — look, it’s perfectly normal to fixate on awesome character actors, don’t let anyone tell you it’s not — and they’re the ones making us watch something we’ve never heard of. Chances are you will hear of their upcoming project, director Bharat Nalluri’s (Miss Pettigrew Lives For A Day) The Man Who Invented Christmas, a sort-of biopic about Charles Dickens and the events that led him to write A Christmas Carol. Oh yes, Dan Stevens (Downton Abbey) and Christopher Plummer are the leads in this one. That’s nice. We’ll just be catching it (in late 2018) for the co-stars. Q Romeo San Vicente recommends Miriam Margolyes as the weird landlady in the even weirder New Wave disco cult musical ‘The Apple’.

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60 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | FRIVOLIST

Qsaltlake.com | issue 267 | May 2017

the frivolist 4 reasons why banning bachelorette parties from gay bars is wrong

BY MIKEY ROX

Grand diva

RuPaul recently weighed in on the persistent issue of how we’re supposed to feel about bachelorette parties in gay bars, with at least one Huffington Post writer describing it as the “definitive word” on the topic on social media.

“Check yourself before you wreck yourself,” Ru said on the podcast Dinner Down Party. “You know, this is an important thing: People who live in the mainstream and the status quo think that everyone else is there to serve them.” I’ve never gotten that impression from straight people, or women specifically, but OK. Also, who made RuPaul our spokesperson?

Nevertheless, the debate on whether chicks wearing dicks (because bachelorette parties love some plastic penis) are welcome in our bars goes back to at least early 2009 when the Chicago Tribune published an article on how the gay rights battle — specifically marriage equality — put a strain on the celebrations. The issue reached peak shade in 2012 when popular Los Angeles watering hole and grind spot The Abbey was the first to implement an all-out ban on the fem festivities. At the time, it was a political statement to suggest that if gay people can’t get married, we don’t want you flaunting your right to wed in our sanctuary. Fair enough — but that battle is won. So why, even now, are we still shutting out our straight allies? It’s not right, and here’s why.

It’s Straight-Up Discrimination For decades the LGBT community has protested, marched and lobbied for legislation against our discrimination, yet we’re quick to turn around and apply limitations to other groups with which we take issue.

Before we received full marriage rights, the basis for anti-bachelorette rhetoric was logical — if we can’t get married, don’t rub your impending nuptials in our faces; that stance had merit at least. Now, however, the case against the hostile takeover of our bars, as some describe it, is about how disruptive these groups are. They’re wild and out of control and they treat us like some sort of sideshow — so say the torch-wielders. I’ve never experienced the latter (and you probably need to lighten up or grow a pair if you’ve ever felt this way),

and all I can think when I hear that summation is: You mean they got drunk at a bar where they knew they’d have fun, but because they’re not hot guys with take-home potential, they’re a distraction and you don’t want them here? Well, when you put it that way…

It’s Still a Political Statement That’s Sexist and Heterophobic While the ban on bachelorette parties was once a political statement meant to bring attention to the very real issue of why same-sex couples weren’t permitted to marry one another in most of the United States, it now exists as a misogynistic attempt to shun straight culture. Think I’m off base? Consider the same scenario but with the opposite sex. If a group of straight guys came into the gay bar for a bachelor party, the joint would be all over it lickety-split. Which makes the real problem then not the celebration of hetero marriage with bachelorette parties in our bars but rather the reduction of floor space for available dick on a fuck night (because we all know if it was a stag party, your new life goal would be to get that best man in your bed). Instead of calling it a ban on bachelorette parties (which reeks of prejudice), the directive should prohibit party paraphernalia like cakes, wands, balloons and other large objects. The compromise will require bachelorette parties to tone it down a bit, or they’ll go somewhere that doesn’t apply those restrictions. At least then the issue will be about what patrons are bringing to the bar and not the type of customer we’re willing to let in.

Some Gay People in Gay Bars Are Just as Disruptive Bachelorette parties are loud, obnoxious and rude, according to the haters. Meanwhile, I’m over here like, have you ever met a bent-up queen? Gay people are some of the most obnoxious drunks I’ve ever encountered — myself included. Another clapback is that bachelorette parties should have more respect for the establishment and its patrons. That’s interesting,

too, because I’ve never had a woman in a gay bar grab my crotch without asking or tell me how hard they want to fuck my “boy pussy” when I didn’t give any indication that that was an option. Furthermore, I’ve never had a bachelorette or her party snap in my face in a Z-formation, try to “read” me (which is a mistake for anybody), or undermine my partnered status right in front of my face — all reasons I’ve had to put disrespectful gay men in their place at the homo club. The point is, assholes are assholes, regardless of their gender or what they’re celebrating, and they should be dealt with equitably.

It’s Offensive to the LGBT Community That Embraces Straight Allies I can’t say that I’m truly offended by this issue — who has time for that these days? — but I do recognize that there is a portion of our community who views the suggested ban on bachelorette parties as detrimental to the relationship between our straight allies. What message is it sending when we’re demanding on Capitol Hill to be treated the same as everyone else then going back home and telling certain types of people they’re not welcome where we are. That mentality was born on the whims of elitist gay men (and that’s who’s propagating this issue today, by the way), and it goes against everything we’ve fought for. Straight women have long been our allies and partners in crime — they’re our best friends and we’re their best friends — so why are we deciding how they should celebrate a special occasion in their life and telling them how to act while they’re doing it? Live and let live. Q Mikey Rox is an award-winning journalist and LGBT lifestyle expert whose work has been published in more than 100 outlets across the world. Connect with Mikey on Twitter @mikeyrox.

DATING | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 61

May 2017 | issue 267 | Qsaltlake.com

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date, no big expectations. Simply dining out over great conversation and maybe go do something fun and challenging FAVORITE TV SHOW Will and Grace CELEBRITY CRUSH(ES) Colin Jost ONE OBSCURE FACT ABOUT YOURSELF I have the personality and maturity level of the average person in their mid to late 30’s

62 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | FINAL WORD

Qsaltlake.com | issue 267 | May 2017

the perils of petunia pap smear

The tale of ‘Sheep May Safely Graze’

BY PETUNIA PAP SMEAR

The road

to an Easter Basket is fraught with danger and excitement. It was Easter weekend and there were endless scenes of cute little children hunting for Easter eggs and chasing baby sheep in a grassy meadow with flowers blooming all over the place, trying to sell laundry detergent. In our culture, sheep are given a pure and delightsome image and are made out to be idyllic innocent, godly creatures.

I’m here to tell you that nothing could be further from the truth. When I was a little princess, during the Cretaceous Period, growing up on a farm in Idaho, (yes, I am an Ida-Homo) we had 5,000 sheep on our family farm. Sheep are not innocent.

Sheep are not godly. Sheep are the most sinister, foul, obnoxious, disgusting creatures placed on this planet. And the stench.

Ooohhhhh the stench!

Sheep are referenced many times in the Bible. Last week the sermon in church was about when Jesus said to Peter, “Feed my sheep.” All I could think

about is how the sheep would almost trample me when I was trying to feed them. They would crowd around me so tight that I could not move, and therefore could not deliver the hay to the feeder. I would try and prod them with the handle of the pitch fork trying to clear the way but to no avail. In desperation, I would turn the pitch fork around and poke them in the rear with the sharp tines. That did get some results, however, the startled sheep would then try to move too fast and their hooves would spin out on the concrete kicking sheep shit up onto my face and mouth.

During dry weather, the manure would be all powdery and stick to my sweaty face like rouge.

During wet weather, the doo doo would be liquid and would run down my cheeks like Tammy Faye’s mascara. Sadly, I have accurate firsthand knowledge of what sheep shit tastes like.

The repulsive animals would always be discovering different ways to escape from their corrals. My father was bishop of the ward, so consequently, he had to go to early meetings on

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Sunday mornings and the feeding of the loathsome creatures was left to me. One Sunday I had just finished feeding the abhorrent beasts and as I came in from the corral, the rest of the family had just left to go to the church. I quickly took a bath to remove the stench, then I was supposed to go to the church in time for priesthood meeting. Just as I was getting out of the bathtub, I glanced out of the window. I saw a most horrendous sight. The sheep had escaped from the corral and were all around the house, eating the lawn. I cracked open the back door and sure enough, the house was completely surrounded by the woolly quadrupeds.

Quickly, I threw on a pair of running shorts and a pair of hip-wader boots that were lying by the back door, and ran out of the house trying to scare the sheep back to the coral. Stupid me, all I managed to do was to panic the herd and they began to run around the house the south side of the house. Now let me tell you, there is one unbending truth about sheep.

Sheep follow each other. As the beginning of the herd fully rounded the house, they came upon the rear of the herd as they were disappearing around the corner of the house and the front of the herd began to follow the rear of the herd in a never ending stampede of wool.

I knew that I needed to stop the stampeding hoard, or in their panic they would run themselves to death. So, despite being nearly naked, I ran out into the middle of the pandemonium waving my arms and yelling. Well, a certain buck would have nothing of it and he jumped hitting me full in the chest, knocking me to the ground. SHEEP FOLLOW EACH OTHER! The rest of the 5,000 proceeded to run over the top of me with their sharp hooves. I quickly realized that I

was going to die if I couldn’t get out of the stampede. So I made it up onto my hands and knees and began to crawl. I finally made it to the edge. My nearly naked body was covered in fresh sheep shit, bloodied and bruised except where the hip waders had protected my legs.

I needed something big to stop the flowing herd. I hopped into my car, Queertanic, a 1962 Buick LaSabre, for which I had traded a pig to my grandma.

Luckily the keys were in the ignition. I slowly drove my beloved Queertanic directly into the stampeding throng. Sheep began hitting, head-on into the side of the car. Six of the unfortunate critters broke their necks against the car, leaving several small dents in the metal. Finally with the mass of Queertanic in the way, the stampede ended.

Then I went and got the goat on a leash and led the sheep back into the coral. Thankfully this time, the sheep still followed each other. The lawn was now non-existent. I never made it to church and we had dutch oven lamb chops for Family Home Evening the next night.

This story leaves us with several important questions: 1. Was removing sheep shit from my face good training for removing glitter?

2. When they reference sheep in church, should I stand up shouting the pungent truth?

3. Should I develop a line of hip-wader high heels to protect drag queen’s legs?

4. Should I bedazzle some hip-wader boots for my next bingo?

5. Was the buck that knocked me down trying to mate with me in my nakedness?

6. Are lamb chops killed in the line of duty less fattening?

These and other eternal questions shall be answered in future chapters of the Perils of Petunia Pap Smear. Q

May 2017 | issue 267 | Qsaltlake.com

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KYBELLA

$

Exp 5/27/17

450/Vial

Average 2 Vials/ treatment

Permanently Reduce Double Chin

Exp 5/27/17

Before

After

*All injections must be used by 5/27/17

Non-surgical fat reduction

600/cycle

$

Exp 5/27/17

E PACKAG LOW SO PRICING N’T WE CA !

PRINT IT

Before

After

Before

After

LASER HAIR REMOVAL

$

1 Area

2 Areas

3 Areas

29/MO $49/MO $69/MO $49 Enrollment fee Exp 5/27/17

Molly Mears, MD 801-294-9999 1560 S. Renaissance Towne Dr, Bountiful www.enlightenlaser.com