QSaltLake December 2014

salt lake magazine

UTAH’S GAY, LESBIAN, BISEXUAL, TRANSGENDER AND ALLY

December 2014 Issue 238 GaySaltLake.com FREE

HOLIDAY SHOPPING KIESZA KINK IN SALT LAKE BECOME AN UNDERWEAR MODEL

PHOTO: WARNER BROS. RECORDS

AN INTERVIEW WITH BAWDY, BELT-Y

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BY CHRIS AZZOPARDI

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December 12 & 13, 2014 at 7:30pm December 14, 2014 at 4pm First Baptist Church • 777 S. 1300 E. $10 General Admission

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Tickets available om choir members, at Club Try-Angles, or online at brownpapertickets.com We are also accepting donations of non-perishable food, so please bring at least one item per person with you!

4 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | NEWS

gaysaltlake.com | issue 238 | december 2014

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Utah Repertory Theater Company Proudly Presents The Utah Premiere of the Explosive Rock Musical

BA RE Bare Your Soul—Or Hide It From Those Who Matter Most?

January 16-31, 2015 Sugar Space Warehouse Theater for the Performing Arts, River District UtahRep.org/tickets

saltmagazine lake

december 2014 | issue 238 | gaysaltlake.com

QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 7

staffbox publisher/editor Michael Aaron

copy editor Tony Hobday designer Christian Allred sales Bob Henline, Craig Ogan, Shelley Stewart

contributors Chris Azzopardi, Lynn Beltran, Paul Berge, We Know a Quicker Way Home • We Know a Quicker Way Home • We Know a Quicker Way Home • We Know a Quicker Way Home • We Know a Quicker W Dave Brousseau, Abby Dees, Jack Fertig, Greg Fox, Charles Lynn Frost, Bob Henline, Tony Hobday, Christopher Katis, Rock Magen, Sam Mills, Mikey Rox, Gregg Shapiro, Petunia Pap Smear, Anthony Paull, Steven Petrow, Ed Sikov, Ben ­Williams, D’Anne ­Witkowski distribution Steven Ball, Michael Hamblin,

Lin Marie, Blaine Osborne, Jason Van Campen publisher

Salt Lick Publishing LLC. 222 S Main St, Ste 500 Salt Lake City, Utah 84101 tel: 801-649-6663 Contact emails: general: info@qsaltlake.com editorial: editor@qsaltlake.com sales: sales@qsaltlake.com

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QSaltLake Magazine is a trademark of Salt Lick Publishing, LLC. Copyright © 2014, Salt Lick Publishing, LLC. All rights reserved. No material may be reprinted or reproduced without written permission from the publisher. 15,000 copies of QSaltLake Magazine are distributed free of charge at over 300 locations across the Wasatch Front. Free copies are limited to one per person. For additional copies, contact us at 801-649-6663. It is a crime to destroy or dispose of current issues or otherwise interfere with the distribution of this newsmagazine. Publication of the name or photograph of any individual or organization in articles or advertising in QSaltLake Magazine is not to be construed as any indication of the sexual orientation of such persons. Printed in the U.S.A. on recycled paper. Please recycle this copy when you are through with it.

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Tickets at: BIGGAYFUNBUS.COM or 801-649-6663 x2 or at Club Try-Angles during normal hours

NEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 9

december 2014 | issue 238 | gaysaltlake.com

Apple CEO: ‘I’m proud to be gay’ Apple CEO Tim Cook came out as gay in an op-ed Bloomberg Businessweek published in November.

“While I have never denied my sexuality, I haven’t publicly acknowledged it either, until now,” he wrote.

“So let me be clear: I’m proud to be gay, and I consider being gay among the greatest gifts God has given me.”

Cook wrote his homosexuality has given him “a deeper understanding of what it means to be in the minority and provided a window into the challenges that people in other minority groups deal with every day.”

“It’s made me more empathetic, which has led to a richer life,” he said. “It’s been tough and uncomfortable at times, but it has given me the confidence to be myself, to follow my own path, and to rise above adversity and bigotry. It’s also given me the skin of a rhinoceros, which comes in handy when you’re the CEO of Apple.”

Cook, 53, has been CEO of Apple since August 2011.

Lawyers to petition Supreme Court to hear 6th Circuit marriage cases Lawyers representing gay couples who are challenging same-sex marriage bans in four states plan to petition the U.S. Supreme Court to consider the cases. Dan Canon, a lawyer who represents the four same-sex couples challenging Kentucky’s gay nuptials ban, said the plaintiffs in the Bluegrass State, Tennessee, Ohio and Michigan “intend to seek a writ of certiorari from the Supreme Court.” This announcement came a day after a three-judge panel with the 6th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals in Cincinnati upheld the constitutionality of the four states’ same-sex marriage bans.

Texas religious freedom bill introduced A Texas lawmaker on Nov. 10 introduced a bill that critics say would allow business owners to refuse service to gay customers.

Lone Star Q reported state Sen. Donna Campbell (R-New Braunfels) introduced

news The top things you should know happened last month (Full stories at gaysaltlake.com.)

Senate Joint Resolution 10 that proposes a state constitutional amendment “relating to a person’s freedom of religion.”

“Government may not burden an individual’s or religious organization’s freedom of religion or right to act or refuse to act in a manner motivated by a sincerely held religious belief unless the government proves that the burden is in furtherance of a compelling governmental interest and is the least restrictive means of furthering that interest,” reads the bill.

Blood safety panel calls for ending ban on gay donors The U.S. Food and Drug Administration’s current policy of prohibiting men who have sex with men from donating blood is no longer supported by medical evidence and should be replaced with a less restrictive donor policy, according to a federal advisory panel of experts in blood-related diseases. The U.S. Advisory Committee on Blood and Tissue Safety and Availability voted 16 to 2 on Thursday to recommend that the FDA discontinue its 31-year-old blanket policy of permanently banning blood donations by men who have sex with men, or MSM, and instead require a oneyear period of same-sex sexual abstinence for MSM prior to their donating blood.

Puerto Rico marriage ruling appealed Lambda Legal last month formally appealed a federal judge’s decision to uphold Puerto Rico’s same-sex marriage ban.

The LGBT legal advocacy group filed a four-page motion with the 1st U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals in Boston — under

whose jurisdiction the American commonwealth falls — in a lawsuit originally filed by a lesbian couple who married in Massachusetts in 2004. The appeal comes a week after U.S. District Judge Juan PérezGiménez dismissed the case.

“Puerto Rico has many loving, committed couples who need the dignity and respect of marriage as soon as possible, and we won’t stop fighting on their behalf,” said Omar Gonzalez-Pagan of Lambda Legal.

Trans activist, author Leslie Feinberg dies at 65 Nationally acclaimed transgender activist and author Leslie Feinberg, whose 1993 novel “Stone Butch Blues” is considered a groundbreaking work on the issue of gender identity, died Nov. 15 at her home in Syracuse, N.Y. She was 65. She had been suffering from complications associated with Lyme disease and other tick-borne infections since the early 1970s before being diagnosed with the infections in 2008, according to her partner and spouse of 22 years, Minnie Bruce Pratt.

Gay diplomat confirmed as U.S. ambassador to Vietnam The U.S. Senate confirmed on Monday an openly gay Foreign Service officer to become U.S. ambassador to Vietnam.

Ted Osius, who was nominated by President Obama for the position in May, was confirmed by voice vote as part of a group of four ambassadorial nominees.

According to his bio, Osius is a career member of the Foreign Service and in recent years has served as an associate professor at the National War College and a senior fellow at the think tank known as the Center for Strategic & International Studies.

Prior to that, Osius served in Asia for most of his 25 years in foreign service, working at U.S. embassies in Indonesia, Thailand, Vatican City, the Philippines and New Delhi, India. Additionally, he’s served as deputy director of the Office of Korean Affairs in the State Department’s Bureau of East Asian & Pacific Affairs.

Although Osius’ confirmation wasn’t contentious on the Senate floor, he was reportedly among 25 nominees Senate Republicans blocked in August in response to Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid (DNev.) changing the rules to ease confirmation of presidential appointees.

10 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | NEWS

gaysaltlake.com | issue 238 | december 2014

Utah Pride ’14 drew more people, made less income as costs rise Numbers are in for the 2014 Utah Pride Festival and Parade, and it looks like another banner year for attendees, but profits to help run the Utah Pride Center are down. At its board meeting Monday, financials for this year’s annual festival were presented by Festival co-directors Jen Parsons-Soran and Michelle Stephen.

This year, the Festival drew 34,608 people, including volunteers, sponsors, booth personnel and Center staff. Of that, 26,309 were festival-goers with tickets. Around 7,000 showed up for Saturday’s festivities, and over 19,000 attended on Sunday. Last year’s festival drew around 28,000 total participants, nearly a 24 percent increase in total attendance this year.

Salt Lake City police estimated the Utah Pride Parade as a total of 35,000 participants, including all those marching in the parade and those on the sidelines watching.

Nearly 900 volunteers staffed 1,400 3-hour shifts plus 14 community partner organizations covered such things as the merchandise booth run by the Utah Bears, the wine bar run by QUAC, etc. There were 248 vendors, up from 175 the previous year, 143 parade entries, up from 125 in 2013 and between 8,000 and 11,000 people participated in parade entries, according to the report.

Income for the event was reported at $663,330. About 37 percent of that was from admissions ($246,000), 27 percent in beverage sales, 25 percent in cash sponsors, $2,500 pitched into the large rainbow flag in the parade, and $2,800 in tips at beverage stations.

Expenses, however, were much higher this year than last at $528,282. Thirty-five percent of that was used in logistics (tents, signs, venue rental, insurance, etc.), 15 percent for staffing and stipends, seven percent for security and safety, five percent for permits and insurance, and 11 percent for entertainers and their travel.

The net proceeds, therefore, ended up at roughly $135,000, almost half of 2013’s $264,000. Total expenses in 2013 were only $372,000.

The largest increases were in entertainment — a $60,000 increase, and police/fire/ EMS costs nearly doubled. Logistics were up 50 percent in part because of the larger footprint of the event this year to accom-

modate the additional vendors. The cost of beverages rose 30 percent and staff costs increased 29 percent, though that number can likely attributed to more accurate reporting and the fact that “appreciation stipends” were awarded to key Festival volunteers.

Sponsorships came in at $431,955, of which $97,300 was in cash, including $8,000 from Bruce Bastian. The balance of that amount was in-kind donations, such as $38,000 from Le Croissant Catering which hosted the Grand Marshal Reception, and media donations at a value of $191,000. QSaltLake was a Diamond sponsor, the highest media level with a value of at least $25,000 in media.

Discussion about the event centered in part around the disagreement the board had with leaving the tickets at $8 in advance, $10 at the gate for each day or $16 in advance for a weekend pass. The board had wanted a $15 price for Saturday night.

Simple math would show an increase of

$28,000 from Saturday ticket sales, but Parsons-Soran noted that attendees would have to see a $15 valuation in the entertainment. On Saturday, the Festival entertainment was Betty Who and drag performer Sherry Vine. On Sunday it was Steve Grand and Joey Arias. Both days featured a full schedule of local performers as well.

Parsons-Soran hinted that the community would be excited for the entertainment for the 2015 Utah Pride Festival, but negotiations were still being handled and an announcement would be very premature.

Already, the organizers know that the parade will have an increase in expenses next year, as the requirement for portapotties will be increased from 9 to 100 and additional safety personnel, according to the Salt Lake County Dept. of Health.

The 2015 Festival will begin on Thursday, June 4 with the Interfaith Service, Friday June 5 Grand Marshal Reception and the Festival on Saturday, June 6 and 7.

The parade will happen on Sunday, June 7. Changes to the Festival schedule are anticipated and will be announced as the event nears. Q

Gender Blender held at Utah State in Logan Women dressed as men, men dressed as women, people dressed to guess joined together in Logan on Saturday night for the Cache Valley Gay-Straight Alliance’s annual Gender Blender event.

“It’s an event to raise awareness of breaking down gender binaries,” Utah State senior Mel Austin, vice president of the university’s Love Is For Everyone (LIFE) club told the Utah Statesman. “Breaking down the stereotypes and allowing us to show there’s fluidity in gender and gender expression and everyday appearances.”

This year’s theme was cosplay and partiers were encouraged to cross dress as their favorite characters.

Proceeds from the event were donated to LIFE, which is focused on allowing

LGBT and ally people to meet one another on campus.

The event was held at the Bullen Center in downtown Logan and included a drag contest, music, dancing, food and alcohol for those age 21 and older. The contests were for the best Drag King, for women dressed as male characters; Drag Queen, for men dressed as female characters; and, for the first time, Drag Androgynous, for those who didn’t identify as either a man or a woman or were a blend of both.

About 90 people participated and food for the event was donated by Great Harvest Bread Co. and Logan restaurant Herm’s Inn, owned by Ryan Bird and Heather Santi of Salt Lake’s Eggs in the City.

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december 2014 | issue 238 | gaysaltlake.com

Help get QSaltLake in every public library in Utah Since we began publishing, we’ve always wanted to be able to send several copies to every library in the state, in order to reach those in smaller, more rural, communities. We feel that LGBT people, especially youth, need some kind of connection to our community. parents, family and friends of LGBT people also need to understand our local community.

The total cost to do this has always been just out of our reach. With the additional copies we’d need to print, envelopes, labels, and of course postage, it will cost us just over $7,500 to do this for one year. We have volunteers who will help prepare the mailing, saving that additional cost. We believe in this enough that we will pay for the first third of the project. We need help for the rest. Utah community members have said they also find this important, and have offered to help if we put up a crowdfunding campaign.

Please consider donating to this cause to allow us to reach every Utah public library,

from Garland to Hurricane, Nephi to Parowan, Enterprise to Castle Dale.

As thank yous, we are offering the following rewards to donors at certain levels:

$5 - A BIG THANK YOU! Every bit helps, and you will receive: • our blessing and excuse to do a huge happy dance like no one’s looking, • a virtual hug • your name (unless you choose to remain anonymous) on our thank you page in QSaltLake when the campaign is over.

$25 - A HUGE THANK YOU!: For $25 you will receive: • all of the above, and • a hand-written thank you card from us inside: • the QSaltLake Love and Marriage issue delivered to your door

$50 - A THANK YOU AND A SUBSCRIPTION FOR YOU For $50 you will receive: • all of the above, and

• a full year of QSaltLake delivered to your door

$100 - A THANK YOU AND THREE SUBSCRIPTIONS FOR YOU For $100 you will receive: • all of the above, and • a full year of QSaltLake delivered to your door • a full year of The Advocate delivered to your door • a full year of OUT Magazine delivered to your door

$500 - BENEFACTOR VIP LEVEL: For $500 you will receive: • all of the above, and • VIP tickets to our annual FABBY Awards • 2 VIP seats on the remaining three Big Gay Fun Buses of the season • a mention and thank you at the FABBY Awards of your support

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12 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | NEWS

gaysaltlake.com | issue 238 | december 2014

‘Capitol 13’ protesters finally appear in Salt Lake court; trial to be scheduled Exactly nine months after 13 supporters of an LGBT nondiscrimination bill were arrested for blocking access to a legislative committee hearing, the group finally faced their first day in a courtroom.

A pre-trial conference was held for the group, since dubbed the “Capitol 13,” in Salt Lake

City Justice Court before Judge Catherine Roberts. The possibility of the protesters accepting a plea deal was off the table, as each wanted to go forward to be heard. They face charges of class B misdemeanor disrupting a meeting, which carries a maximum six months in jail and $1000 fine.

Ogden Pride Inc. leaders (from left to right) Ali Johnson, Jeff Lensman, Christopher Wood and Tom Robin after their first board meeting.

Group forms Ogden Pride Seeking to be the fourth active Pride in the state of Utah, a group of Ogden gays and lesbians to form an organization, set plans for future events, and announce a physical location.

Ogden Pride, Inc. has aligned with the existing nonprofit organization Northern Utah Coalition. Organized on October 11, National Coming Out Day, the first board meeting was held Nov. 13.

“Ogden Pride celebrates and supports the LGBT community, individuals and their families and allies in Northern Utah,” Project Director Christopher Wood stated in a release. “We are committed to excellence in advocacy, educational programs, and strengthening inclusive communities.”

The group opened up the

Ogden Pride Center at 536 24th Street with a soft launch on Friday, Nov. 21. They then moved to Club Alleged for a 21 and over social and fundraiser.

The Center will be open Fridays from 4:30 to 7:30 p.m. for those 18 and over.

They are working with the city of Ogden and the Historic 25th Street Association to bring the first Pride in summer of 2015. They are also working on a queer prom in Spring.

At the first meeting, Jeff Lensman was elected as president, Gage Church as treasurer and Ali Johnson and Tom Robin were elected as board members.

Christopher Wood was appointed as project director..

Information can be found at ogdenpride. org or by emailing ogdenpride@gmail.com or calling 801-917-4588.

This hearing was the first in what is likely to be months of court hearings. The outcome was a date for a scheduling conference. The protesters’ attorneys — Danielle Hawkes, Christopher Wharton and Ron Yengich — will meet then with the judge and a Salt Lake City prosecutor to determine what the judge will allow as part of the trial and to set a timeline for the hearings.

“At the next hearing, we will be able to ask the judge if she will allow such defenses as what was in The [Salt Lake] Tribune on Sunday,” Hawkes said.

On Sunday, an op-ed by attorneys Brett L. Tolman and Paul C. Burke was published in the Tribune saying that a trial of the protesters could reveal animus on the part of Utah legislators.

“Their eventual trial may open a door into the inner workings of the Legislature and may expose legislative animus against gay people,” the pair wrote. They noted that the committee meeting was chaired by Utah Sen. Stuart Reid, a long-time opponent of any pro-LGBT legislation.

“Having been accused of disrupting the work of the Senate Education Committee by allegedly causing its meeting to be canceled, the Capitol 13 can be expected to call the committee’s chairman, Sen. Stuart Reid, to testify. If Reid testifies that the meeting was not disrupted or was cancelled for other reasons, the Capitol 13 should be acquitted,” they wrote. “On the other hand, if Reid testifies that the Capitol 13 disrupted the meeting, defense attorneys for the Capitol 13 may seek to undermine his credibility by revealing his bias against gay people. Defense attorneys may suggest that Reid felt contempt for the Capitol

13 and may have canceled this committee meeting in order to prompt the criminal charges against the non-violent protesters.”

Reid was outspoken last December in his opinion of U.S. District Judge Robert Shelby’s ruling that struck the voter-approved Amendment 3 and other laws that prohibited same-sex marriage by saying the decision was “in effect massacring the institution of traditional marriage and morality.” He has called “homosexual activity” immoral and pulled no punches that he was, indeed, being discriminatory.

“As a member of the committee, I voted against [SB262, the 2013 nondiscrimination bill,] because I believe that homosexual activity is immoral. In an effort to be authentic, I admitted that my belief was in fact discriminating and that discrimination was the reason I could not vote for the legislation.”

Anti-LGBT animus was a part of the arguments made in court before Shelby in the Kitchen v. Herbert same-sex marriage decision. Future litigation on any topic involving Utah’s gay and transgender community could use such testimony by the senator, and/or any other legislator summoned, as proof of animus in the Utah State Legislature.

“By defending themselves at trial, the Capitol 13 may now have the opportunity to develop proof that the nondiscrimination bill was killed by legislators with animus against Utah’s gay community,” Tolman and Burke wrote.

Protester Troy Williams spoke to the press after the hearing, saying “The Capitol 13 represents a segment of the gay, trans and ally community who loves our state and loves

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december 2014 | issue 238 | gaysaltlake.com

our nation, and recognizes that the State has failed to address our needs.”

“We blocked the committee meeting in the same way that all pro-LGBT bills have been blocked by the [Utah State] Legislature,” he said. “As we have been blocked, we chose to participate in the proud tradition of this nation — civil disobedience.”

He said that he hopes the moratorium on any LGBTrelated bills will be lifted now that same-sex marriage is the “law of the land” in Utah.

“We will join once again

with Sen. Steve Urquhart [RSt. George] on a bill for basic protections in housing and employment based on sexual orientation and gender identity,” Williams said.

“We belong in the People’s House,” Williams continued.

“We are the constituents of the legislators.”

Also arrested in February were Michelle and Gail Turpin, Donna Weinholtz, Gail Murdock, Jake Hanson, Orlando Luna, Dustin Trent, Matt Conway, Kevin Garner, Steven Germann, Angela Isaacs and Matthew Landis. Q

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14 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | NEWS

gaysaltlake.com | issue 238 | december 2014

As World AIDS Day approaches, UN warns of the threat of an AIDS rebound South African actress Charlize Theron threw her weight behind an urgent new UN campaign to end AIDS as a global health threat by 2030.

The UN warned the HIV virus risks spiraling back out of control unless world leaders bolster action now by agreeing to “fast-track” efforts to eradicate AIDS. A new UN report, launched

by Theron and Michel Sidibe, executive director of UN-

according to the study.

The fast-track strategy also aims to cut the annual number of new HIV infections by more than 75 percent to 500,000 in 2020 and then to 200,000 in 2030.

And it sets an additional target of zero discrimination against those with the virus by 2020.

Theron, a UN “messenger of peace” and head and founder of her own Africa Outreach

talking truthfully about what HIV was.”

She added: “By no means am I putting myself on the same level as Princess Diana, but I feel that we all have a responsibility to each other.”

“Am I aware that I bring some kind of a spotlight to it? Sure. And I feel absolutely no shame to utilize that as much as I possibly can to get knowledge and access to this information across,” she added.

Since 1981, around 78 million people have been infected

by the human immunodeficiency virus (HIV) that causes AIDS, according to UNAIDS. Thirty-nine million have died from AIDS-related illnesses.

In 2013, around 35 million people were living with HIV, nearly 71 percent of them in sub-Saharan Africa.

Last year, 12.9 million people in low- and middleincome countries had access to HIV drugs, but at least 28 million are eligible for them under World Health Organization (WHO) guidelines.

Utah AIDS Foundation’s Season’s Givings You can help families and individuals living with HIV by supporting the Utah AIDS Foundation’s Season’s Givings program. Make a new holiday tradition with your family, friends, neighbors, co-workers or church group. You can participate in a number of ways:

AIDS, called for adoption of a set of medium-term targets to counter the disease, with the goal of preventing some 21 million AIDS-related deaths.

“We have bent the trajectory of the epidemic,” said Sidibe. “Now we have five years to break it for good or risk the epidemic rebounding out of control.”

The proposed strategy employs a “90-90-90” formula as the goal for 2020: 90 percent of people with HIV knowing their HIV status; 90 percent who know their HIV-positive status on treatment; and 90 percent of those on treatment with suppressed viral loads.

The number would then be stepped up to 95 by 2030, which if met would avert nearly 28 million new HIV infections,

Project, added: “When young people have access to quality HIV health and education options, they make smart choices for their futures.

“Let’s make sure adolescents everywhere are empowered to be part of the solution to ending this epidemic,” she said.

“Meeting UNAIDS fast-track targets will ensure no one is left behind.”

In an interview with AFP, Theron — whose country has the most people living with HIV globally — recalled how Britain’s Princess Diana changed the way people talked about AIDS in the 1980s.

“A photograph of Princess Diana hugging and kissing an HIV positive patient in England,” she said, “had a real effect on how people started

FINANCIAL DONATION Your financial gift benefits individuals and families affected

by HIV. Send a check or make an online donation today at utahaids.org

PERSONAL CARE STOCKINGS Help ease the financial strain of a family or individual living with HIV by donating a festive holiday stocking filled with essential personal care items.

FOOD BASKETS Provide a Thanksgiving or holiday food basket for a family or individual. The Utah Food Bank will provide a turkey and you can help with everything else to complete the meal.

Each basket should contain enough food for a family of four. Include nonperishable and/or food that can be stored

without refrigeration. Share a favorite holiday recipe along with the ingredients. For food basket ideas and tips, see the UAF website.

RED RIBBON TREE ADOPTION Adopting an individual or family makes a great holiday project for your family, company, club or church group. Red Ribbon Tree wishes include things like clothing, bedding and simple household items.

Stop by the Utah AIDS Foundation office today to select an individual or family from the Red Ribbon Tree.

TURKEYS AND HAMS Donate a gift certificate for a turkey or ham to the Utah AIDS Foundation and we will distribute it with a Holiday Meal Basket. Most grocery stores allow you to purchase such gift certificates. Or, if your company provides a holiday meat gift certificate that you are not planning to use, go ahead and donate it to UAF clients.

More information at utahaids.org

Help Make Utah a No-Kill State. adopt. spay/neuter. volunteer.

Join Us at NKUT.org

16 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | NEWS

gaysaltlake.com | issue 238 | december 2014

Salt Lake to celebrate Human Rights Day On Dec. 10, 1948, the United Nations General Assembly adopted the Universal Declaration of Human Rights in response to World War II. Now known as Human Rights Day, it is celebrated across the globe to raise awareness about local and international efforts to improve human rights for all individuals.

The Salt Lake City Mayor’s Office of Diversity & Human Rights and the Salt Lake City Human Rights Commission will host a Human Rights Day Celebration on that day in commemoration and as a fundraiser for the Human Rights Education Project.

HREP is designed to educate Salt Lake City refugees and immigrants about their legal rights and responsibilities in the United States. Funds raised

go to purchase incentives, pay interpreters and assist with transportation.

Tickets to the event will include hors d’oeuvres from Spice Kitchen Incubator, a refugee catering company in Salt Lake City, a silent auction, the unveiling of the Faces of Salt Lake photography and interview exhibit, music and the presentation of the 2014 Human Rights Award. Also, Salt Lake City Queens, representing different ethnicities and nationalities, and the Salt Lake City Youth for Human Rights will be in attendance.

Ticket prices are Students: $8 in advance, $12 at the door.

A valid student ID required at the door. Adults: $15 in advance, $20 at the door. Purchase tickets online at humanrightsday2014.eventbrite.com

RCGSE Celebration of Trees Last year the Royal Court of the Golden Spike Empire started their own Celebration of Trees as a fundraiser for their PWA Christmas Fund.

The group gives individuals who are affected by HIV/AIDS a crisp $100 bill to help them with Christmas.

Trees will be presented and available for auction in the steakhouse at Totem’s Cafe from Dec. 2–4. RCGSE members will be at Totem’s from 5

to 10 p.m. each night to accept bids on the trees. On the final night, Dec. 4, they will close the bids and lucky bidders will take home their beautiful trees. That night, they will also have various activities and pictures with Santa. Children are welcome.

The group is seeking individuals, organizations and businesses to donate a decorated tree for the auction.

To donate a tree, contact Kayla Langlois at ­pinkpearlprincess39@gmail.com

Q mmunity Thanksgiving for orphans As is tradition for decades, both Club Try-Angles and the Sun Trapp will host a free buffet on Thanksgiving Thursday for their patrons. All those over 21 are welcome.

WHEN: Thanksgiving, Thursday Nov. 27, 4 p.m.

WHERE: Club Try-Angles, 251 W. 900 South; The SunTrapp, 106 S. 600 West

Gay Men’s Book Club This month, the Gay Men’s Book Club will discuss The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde.

WHEN: 6pm, Wednesday, Dec. 17 WHERE: Sprague Library 2131 S Highland Dr INFO: keith@utahaids.org

Thanksgiving Weekend Big Gay Fun Bus The second trip of the season for the Big Gay Fun Bus will happen Thanksgiving weekend. Now that the family thing is done, and you’ve had a day to settle back down, head on out to Wendover with the group for a day of gambling and debauchery.

WHEN: Satruday, Nov. 29, noon to 9pm WHERE: Bus leaves Club Try-Angles at Noon. 251 W 900 South INFO: BigGayFunBus.com

Crowd-enforced Christmas karaoke at the Tavernacle In its third year, a group of holiday music enthusiasts take over the Tavernacle the Sunday night before Christmas and boo any person that doesn’t sing a holiday-themed song.

“It’s much more fun than you would expect and will get you in the holiday spirit,”

organizer Mark Ferne said.

He also encourages people to wear an ugly sweater or holiday-themed clothes.

WHEN: 9pm, Sunday, Dec. 21 WHERE: Tavernacle, 201 E 300 S

Court to raise funds to help stop domestic abuse Prince Royale Devin Aire and Princess Royale Haven Aire of the Royal Court of the Golden Spike Empire are hosting “Stronger than Yesterday,” to raise funds for the Provo Battered Women’s and Children’s shelter.

WHEN: 10pm Friday, Dec. 19 WHERE: The Sun Trapp, 106 S 600 W

Food Drives for the UAF Food Bank Club Try-Angles and the Salt Lake Men’s Choir are each doing food drives to stock the shelves at the Utah AIDS Foundation Food Bank. Bar patrons are asked to bring non-perishable goods and toiletries to the door on the way in. Those going to the Salt Lake Men’s Choir Christmas concerts are also asked to donate food and toiletry items.

Restore Our Humanity to give ‘Shelby’ Awards An event on the eve of the anniversary of Judge Robert Shelby’s ruling will begin the nominating process for 2014’s Shelbys — awards given by Restore Our Humanity to community members who have made a difference in our community. The Shelbys will be awarded at the Mass Anniversary Party to be held in January to honor and celebrate the anniversary of marriage equality in Utah.

WHEN: Friday, Dec. 19, 7pm WHERE: Bohemian Brewery and Grill, 94 E 7200 S

NEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 17

december 2014 | issue 238 | gaysaltlake.com

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18 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | VIEWS

views

“

AIDS has lost the edge of horror it possessed when it swept through the world in the ’80s...Today’s generation sees it more as something to live with and something to be much less fearful of. And that comes with a sense of, dare I say, laziness...[On PrEP,] We need to be really vigilant and open about the fact that these drugs are not to be taken to increase our ability to have recreational sex...There’s an incredible underlying irresponsibility to that way of thinking… and we don’t yet know enough about this vein of medication to see where it’ll take us down the line.

“

—Zachary Quinto in OUT Magazine

[L]et me be clear: I’m proud to be gay, and I consider being gay among the greatest gifts God has given me ... I’ll admit that this wasn’t an easy choice.

Privacy remains important to me, and I’d like to hold on to a small amount of it. So if hearing that the CEO of Apple is gay can help someone struggling to come to terms with who he or she is, or bring comfort to anyone who feels alone, or inspire people to insist on their e­ quality, then it’s worth the trade-off with my own privacy.”

—Apple CEO Tim Cook in Bloomberg Businessweek.

“

My brother Eamon didn’t choose to be gay. Yes, he chose to wear eyeliner to school and that probably wasn’t the most pragmatic response to the daily torture he experienced at the hands of school bullies.

But he was always proud of who he was. Even when others were casting him out with fists and ridicule and the laughter of pure loathsome derision, he maintained an integrity and dignity that flew in the face of the cruelty that befell him. I don’t know where those bullies are now, the ones who beat

gaysaltlake.com | issue 238 | december 2014

him regularly… But I do know where my brother is. He’s at home in Dublin living in peace and love with his husband of some years, Steven.”

—Colin Farrell in Ireland’s Sunday World newspaper

“

You must always face evil and take it down. The reason evil thrives in the world, the reason hatred thrives in the world, the reason bullying thrives in the world is because of complacency. As long as we continue to take it, it will continue to thrive.”

—Lea Delaria tells Page 6 after being videoed verbally taking down a preacher on the subway

QSaltLake Magazine welcomes your letters to the editor.

Please send your letter

of 300 words or less to

letters@qsaltlake.com.

We reserve the right to edit

for length or libel if a letter

is chosen for publication.

VIEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 19

december 2014 | issue 238 | gaysaltlake.com

first person

Family and ‘family’

BY MICHAEL AARON

I love

the holidays, because it is a time I can spend with my biological family. My mother for my entire life has made Christmas and Thanksgiving a production, overspending on gifts, getting us together to bake goodies for a week prior, and when we were smaller, having us make ornaments and other decor for display. Yes, we bent all of the pages of old Readers’ Digests to make Christmas trees that we spray-painted and glittered.

Much of these traditions live on, but in different ways. I’m not around to help bake things.

I haven’t made a crafty kitch in decades. But Christmas is still special — Mom has made sure of that.

When I moved out of the house to go to college, I found a group of friends through the then-Gay Student Union that I ran. We all lived together for many, many years, and though I was at my family’s on the actual holidays, we always had our own “family” celebrations at our house as well. We would invite all of the “gay orphans,” as we called them — friends whose family kicked them out of the house or just made it so difficult to enjoy their time together, that they didn’t bother — to have a full turkey dinner with all the trimmings on Friday of Thanksgiving weekend.

I moved away for a few years, and many of my friends did as well, so that tradition fell by the way-side. I know, however, that there are many “orphan Thanksgivings” and Christmas celebrations across

this valley for very much the same reasons we held ours.

While times are changing, they’re not changed yet.

These days, for the last 12 years my other family has been the singers in the Salt Lake Men’s Choir. I still marvel at the closeness of the choir family. While the numbers of singers are growing rapidly and it becomes hard to pick up all the names, it still happens in time. This is in no small part due to artistic director Dennis McCracken and president Wesley Brady.

Dennis is like the mom of the choir. He hosts orphan holidays of his own, fussing and cooking and planning to make sure everything is just right.

And Wesley is like the mom of the choir. Yes — we are a two-mom family. Every year on the Fourth of July, Wesley fusses and cooks and plans to make sure the annual summer party is just right.

In the not-too-distant past, lesbians and gay men would call each other “family” as code for being gay. I know some who do it to this day. This is what this community does — it creates families where some are lost.

Hats off to the Sun Trapp and Club Try-Angles and the Utah Pride Center, who will have Thanksgiving and Christmas celebrations for the orphans. And hats off to those who invite their orphaned friends to share in their festivities. This is what is good in the world, and this is the time of year to celebrate that. Q

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20 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | VIEWS

gaysaltlake.com | issue 238 | december 2014

who’s your daddy?

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had a love/hate relationship with the holidays. Love the traditions, hate the commercialization. Love the excitement, hate the crowds. Love the time with family, hate the time with family. Let’s face it, that one is a double-edged sword.

I learned a long time ago that there ain’t no holiday crazy quite like Greek family holiday crazy.

Growing up, the Monday after Thanksgiving was always a source of unparalleled stress. Every year, at the start of the day, the teacher would ask who had eaten mashed potatoes and candied yams for the holiday. My hand was always the only one that never shot up. No teacher ever asked how many of us had eaten spaghetti in lamb sauce or spanakopita. Not once! (And candied yams? What the hell was a yam??)

So, I suppose it shouldn’t surprise me that before the boys came along, Kelly and I didn’t do a whole lot to observe Thanksgiving. In fact, one year we had Chinese take out! As I recall, it was actually really tasty. But upon hearing our culinary choice, my mom laid on the guilt.

And there ain’t no mother guilt like Greek mama guilt. Next day I made a more fitting feast.

Christmas wasn’t ever much better.

Same ethnic cuisine, but this holiday meant the rather liberal Greek interpretation of what constitutes family was in full swing. Of course your high school English teacher is family! Add to this shots of my dad’s home brew, and yeah ... there ain’t no home brew like a Greek baba’s home brew.

With that history in mind, I hope you can see why the upcoming holidays have me a little stressed out. See, before I became a dad, I could cruise through the holidays playing the gay card: eating Chinese food on Thanksgiving; staying out until 3 a.m. on Christmas Eve. But the boys mean I have to rethink my take on the holidays.

Luckily, Kelly understands how the holidays impact my psyche, and works to make sure my holiday neurosis doesn’t rub

off on the boys. To counter my crazy family’s Greek food Thanksgiving, we always have dessert with his family — pies with whipped cream and not a baklava in sight.

And Christmas? Well, he doesn’t so much decorate as Christmas throws up all over the house, violently so.

What I’ve come to realize is that the only way for me to truly shield my sons from the crazy dysfunction that comes with being members of my extended family is to keep them away from that family.

But then they’d miss out on all the fun that comes Before I became from that crazia dad, I could ness and dysfunccruise through tion. the holidays And after all, isn’t embracing playing the gay the craziness, card: eating the dysfunction, Chinese food on the best part of Thanksgiving; family?

So what if durstaying out ing their Papa’s until 3 a.m. on first Christmas at Christmas Eve Dad’s parents’ he witnessed a rather heated argument between your great aunts over the words to “Jingle Bells” in Greek?

And so what if he thought the loud thuds meant they’d come to blows, instead of their stamping feet doing a traditional dance from their father’s village?

Those are the funny, wonderful memories that make the holidays special.

And why shouldn’t a couple of little boys already possessing a truckload of dysfunction from being raised by two gay guys in the suburbs of Salt Lake — enough dysfunction to ensure they’ll always be the funniest guys in the room — add a few more loads of crazy courtesy of family holiday traditions?

Because their ain’t no crazy family holiday dysfunction like a crazy Greek family’s holiday dysfunction.

From our dysfunctional family to yours, Happy Holidays. Q

22 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | VIEWS

gaysaltlake.com | issue 238 | december 2014

lambda lore

Steve Holbrook and 35 years of KRCL

BY BEN WILLIAMS

December 3

will mark the 35th anniversary of “Listener Community Radio,” KRCL FM 91, broadcasting over the airwaves of Salt Lake City. All thanks to a civil rights worker, antiVietnam war leader, politician, environmentalist and Gay man named Stephen Holbrook.

KRCL had been on for little more than six years when sitting alone at my work cubicle, I first heard a woman’s deep, throaty melodious voice say, “If you are, or know or love someone Gay or Lesbian, the next half hour will be informative as well as entertaining.”

I nearly peed my pants. I had had just discovered this funky station calling itself “Radio Free Utah” a few days before. It touted itself as being the voice behind the Zion Curtain, but I was mostly intrigued by its mix of eclectic music and liberal news programming which I discovered while channel surfing.

On that day as I was listening, unsuspecting that my world was soon to be turned upside down, this program came on calling itself “Concerning Gays and Lesbians.” I jumped out of my swivel chair and quickly turned the volume way down low, audible enough for me to hear the salacious and audacious program. By the end of the program, I was a changed man. I realized for the first time that there were Gays, other than me, in the city; enough to warrant a local program.

The woman calling herself Mickey read a series of phone numbers and I quickly scrawled out the numbers and tucked them into my pants pocket. Miraculously this little half-hour program gave me the courage, the resolve and the hope to live a more authentic life. How in the world did a weekly program dedicated to local Gay and Lesbian events happen in Salt Lake City of all places! It began with a vision by a Gay social activist named Stephen Holbrook.

Stephen Holbrook started out as your typical Bountiful young Mormon Republican; however, he came from an old well-connected Mormon family. As expected, he served an LDS Mission and was sent to Hong Kong and Chinatown in San Francisco. Here, stark poverty among the Chinese affected him profoundly. It became the foundation for his belief that “Democracy cannot function if some groups have far more and other groups have far less.” Holbrook left his mission and quit the LDS Church.

At home in Utah, Holbrook’s sense of social justice made him astutely aware of the racial discrimination that existed as mixed-race

marriages were illegal and African Americans were not allowed to purchase certain real estate properties. However, still as a Republican, the 21-year-old went to work for Utah’s Congressman Sherman Lloyd in Washington.

While there Holbrook was given permission by the congressman to attend the March on Washington for Jobs and Freedom in 1963. He heard Martin Luther King famously state that he had a dream. And now, so did Holbrook.

However, an aide to Lloyd said that Holbrook could either work for the congressman or for civil rights but he couldn’t do both. For Holbrook it was an easy decision. He chose to join the Salt Lake branch of the NAACP and soon found himself within the year registering blacks to vote in the deep South.

During the summers of 1964 and 1965, Holbrook campaigned for voter registration with other Freedom Riders, helped by his friend and progressive, Robert Freed, then owner of Lagoon amusement park. Freed actually paid Holbrook’s expenses to Mississippi and also was responsible for the desegregation of Lagoon.

Freed abolished its former policy of prohibiting blacks to swim or dance at the park.

While in Mississippi, Holbrook worked in the office of Charles Evers, the brother of the murdered civil rights leader Medgar Evers. It was an intense time, where thousands were arrested and over 50 black churches were bombed or burned to the ground. In 1964, at the age of 23, while helping two black women register to vote, Holbrook, himself was arrested. His crime; taking a picture of a water fountain with a sign stating “Whites Only.”

Thrown into a cell called a “hot box,” Holbrook spent time there sweltering in the summer heat and humidity. The jailers also turned on the actual cell heater to increase his misery. Eventually Holbrook was freed after a group of Jewish people from New York and officials from Utah raised the money for bail. Back in Utah, the headlines read “Utah Junior Arrested in Mississippi.”

Upon his return to Utah, Holbrook continued to work for civil rights, including campaigning to persuade the LDS church to support civil rights as a moral issue even though the church prohibited African Americans from holding priesthood. As the war in Indochina escalated, Holbrook soon became a leader in Utah’s major anti-Vietnam War movement called the United Front to End the War. The Front held marches, protests, sit down strikes and war moratorium rallies

until 1971. Even early members of Utah’s Gay Liberation Front participated with the Front to end the war. During the course of its existence, over 5,000 people participated in the moratoriums and other major events sponsored by the Front, thanks to his efforts.

One of these events was organizing Utah’s first Earth Day in 1970 at Sugar House Park.

At the age of 29, Holbrook began to work within the system and he ran for the office of Salt Lake City Commissioner to represent students and the impoverished of the city.

While he lost, from 1971 to 1973 he was the chairman to the Advisory Committee on Housing and lobbied the Utah State Legislature for Utah’s first for low-income housing.

In 1972 Holbrook was a delegate to the Democratic National Convention and then he ran and won a seat in the Utah’s House of Representatives as a Democrat. As a left-leaning elected legislator, newspaper reporters loved to comment on the length of Holbrook’s hair and how he was the first man to have a beard in Utah’s legislature since 1896. Despite his appearance, or because of it, he was able to be elected to the legislature for three terms, where he successfully helped to raise money for Utah’s first homeless shelter and was the primary mover of reform of the juvenile justice system.

Because much of Holbrook’s social justice activism involved interacting with the news media, he found that much of Utah’s media outlets were unwilling to cover local dissenting opinions and anti-establishment news.

In 1974, he then began a five-year effort to open a nonprofit community radio station which culminated with KRCL airing in 1979.

Among Holbrook’s vision for the new station was always to include local programming for minorities, including Gays and Lesbians.

Holbrook chose not to seek reelection for a fourth term in 1980 because he was working as the station’s first general manager.

In 1979, KRCL’s first GLBT program was an hour-long show called “Gayjavu.” The program evolved over the next few years into “Concerning Gays and Lesbians” which was one of the nation’s longest continuous local Gay and Lesbian radio program in the nation.

Becky Moss, first using the alias of “Mickey Moss” was producer of the show from 1982 to 2003. During the course of the show, Moss had had many co-hosts; among them, Mel Baker, Erik Meyers, Beauchaine, Dan Fahndrich, Jeff Freedman, Jim Rieger, Debbie Rosenberg and Ben Williams. Disappointingly, as of now, KRCL has not kept its commitment to have local GLBT programming.

With the end of Troy Williams’ RadioActive segment, the vision of Stephen Holbrook is now left unrealized. Q

december 2014 | issue 238 | gaysaltlake.com

VIEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 23

creep of the week

James David Manning I think

BY D’ANNE WITKOWSKI

we all know that Starbucks is a little, well, gay. I mean, they sell drinks like the Gingerbread Latte, Peppermint Mocha, and the Frappuccino (which is the gayest coffee drink name ever). Not to mention the fact that the company supported marriage equality in Washington state. And rumor has it they flew a rainbow flag over their headquarters once.

So, yeah, Starbucks obviously is anti-family and a terrible, terrible place. If you’re a backwards World Net Daily-loving idiot. Which just means more Starbucks for LGBT folks and their friends. Hooray! Everybody else can get their coffee from a seldom-washed coffee pot in their church basement. The end.

No harm, no foul.

I mean, unless Starbucks became, oh, I don’t know, a breeding ground for Ebola. But no one would claim such a crazy thing.

No one except Pastor James David Manning, that is. Manning, of the ATLAH Worldwide Missionary in Harlem, has some pretty interesting theories about Ebola, homosexuality, and Starbucks, specifically how the three go together like pumpkin+spice+latte.

In an episode of The Manning Report, Manning claims that he is on “Ebola watch,” an says that Starbucks is the Ground Zero for the disease because of its “clientele,” which Manning identifies as “generally upscale sodomites who frequent Starbucks [and] sit there with their computers.”

“It’s a meeting place, they exchange a lot of body fluids or hands shaken and contact,” he say, sounding not at all like a crazy person.

“I am now ... warning people to stay away from Starbucks if you don’t want to get Ebola,” he says, “because a large number

of the sodomites and the LGBT crowd that usually, and continue to, approach the idea of sex, intercourse, and dating on a lower, less visible, less social scale because of the nature of what they want to do and who they are. And the reason why they’re fighting so hard to get public recognition and legality for what they’re doing is so they don’t have to stoop to all of these dark alley measures that they have to seek out for having sex.”

If that hurt your brain to read as much as it hurt mine to transcribe, let me break it down for you: Homos lurk at Starbucks seeking out clandestine sex, giving each other Ebola. Okay?

And this will only stop if gays get their relationships legally recognized. Although it is not clear what will happen after that, though from what Manning is saying it looks like gays will then stop lurking in the shadows and just start Ebola-sexing out in the open. Probably.

Manning goes on to say that this is all Obama’s fault because he was born in Kenya. And that furthermore Obama wants everyone in America to get Ebola so that he can declare martial law.

Oh, and Manning adds, “Remember, I told you back in 2007 that Obama was a homo.”

Keep in mind, this is the guy who posted on the sign outside of his church: “Jesus would stone homos. Stoning is still the law.”

So we know he’s the real deal.

So if Manning is warning the completely insane to stay away from Starbucks, then, really, Starbucks is apparently the place to be. So go sit there with your computer and have a Pumpkin Spice Latte. For freedom. Q D’Anne Witkowski has been gay for pay since 2003. She reviews rock and roll shows with her twin sister and teaches writing.

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24 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | VIEWS

gaysaltlake.com | issue 238 | december 2014

queer shift

Moxie SHIFT

BY CHARLES LYNN FROST

I have to

freely admit I am addicted to HBO Sunday evening series. Have been for years.

My latest and possibly absolute favorite is Aaron Sorkin’s The Newsroom. It drives, strives and it thrives. The mental and emotional workout both the actors and the viewers go through in each episode is both elating and exhausting. All of the characters are severely imbalanced in their work-life, however you forgive that when you watch them navigate and operate through an insane newsroom maze every week. The sheer energy it takes for the collective ensemble to pull off the superior intensity is truly an entertainment narcotic.

The characters in the The Newsroom all have moxie. Moxie means the combination of your head, heart, gut and groin, working in a conscious or unconscious symbiotic symphony in an anything-ittakes effort to deliver. In entertainment it’s called “chops,” other professions it goes by expertise, know-how, proficiency, savvy and skill. Having moxie requires a few important ingredients—foremost being confidence. I have the regular opportunity to talk to our diverse LGBTQ community and in a lot of those conversations good people share feelings, experiences, wishes and goals, many of which are incomplete, yet to be started, or abandoned. This always makes me rather saddened when I hear of the importance of what they desire, however being unable to obtain it as of yet; most seeming without hope or pathway.

Within our queer community, and rightfully so, there is a tremendous amount of leftover hurt feelings; this is decreasing with each generation as we have all observed, but the shame and self-guilt coupled with self-doubt seems to still be unfortunately plentiful. If you were raised in Utah, have lived here for a long period of time, there is a permis-

sion or martyr mentality that keeps 1ueer folk from really possessing the enormous courage it takes to fucking just go for it.

Moxie or confidence is a tool you can use in your everyday life to do all kinds of amazing stuff, not least to stop secondguessing yourself, manage your fears and become able to do more of the things that really matter to you.

Several readers of QSaltLake have told me they appreciate my lists in certain columns I have written in the QueerShift series. Well — please take a minute and consider this list that will increase moxie, hopefully allowing you to focus on a few of these and take that step and soar. Here’s my TOP 20.

1. Learning always expands confidence. Start small—sign up for that evening class you’ve been putting off and relish it.

2. Get out of your own head by asking your partner/spouse or best friend what you can do for them today.

3. Hit the gym, walk, do cardio. The physiological effects will leave you feeling great as well as very capable.

4. Go to a networking event and focus on how you could possibly be helpful to other people rather than being nervous about yourself and your own stuff.

5. Get crystal clear on the things that truly matter to you. If they’re not in your life, you need to bring them in.

6. Write a list of the things you’re tolerating and putting up with in your life, then write down how you can remove or lessen each one; release the toxic people and things from your life, they drain you and exhaust your valuable personal resources.

7. Look at a great win or success you’ve experienced and give yourself credit for it, deconstruct how it all came together and recognize your achievements, it’s not egotistical, it’s healthy.

8. Do one thing each day that makes you smile (on the inside or on the outside).

9. Look for the patterns of thought that take you to a place where you start second-guessing or over-thinking. Now imagine that your best friend went through exactly the same thought process and ended up holding themselves back – what would you want to say to them.

10. To increase moxie you have to keep your mind well fed, so write a list of 20 things that keeps your mind feeling nourished and make sure you’re giving them room in your life.

11. Stop playing different roles and squeezing yourself into boxes based on what you think people expect you to act like.

12. Learn to catch yourself every single time you tell yourself that you can’t have, won’t get or aren’t good enough to get what you want, this takes regular practice but is one of the biggies on this list.

13. Next time you come up against a risk or a challenge, listen to what you tell yourself and look for a way that inner dialog can be improved. Ask yourself, “What would make this easier?”

14. Shake the hell out of your thinking and don’t think for a second that you can’t be confident, there are already loads of things you do with natural self-confidence, you just have to notice them and get familiar with how it feels. Examine the things you do when the question of whether you’re capable of achieving arises.

15. Most everyone, including you, have a whole bunch of out-dated rules that determine what you do, don’t do, should do and shouldn’t do. These rules limit your thinking and limit your bias for action.

Tear up your rule book and notice how free you are to make great decisions.

16. Trust your instincts, they know what they’re talking about.

17. If you’d already done everything in life you’d have no need to be scared.

Don’t ever think that being scared means you’re not confident, it simply means

VIEWS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 25

december 2014 | issue 238 | gaysaltlake.com

you’re going somewhere new.

18. Don’t get swept up in the drama of what’s happening right now, look for more useful ways of engaging with what happens in your life.

19. Fear is a way of letting you know that you’re about to stretch yourself and grow your confidence, that’s a good thing, so use it to take yourself forward rather than run away.

20. Being confident, increasing your moxie is an ongoing process, it isn’t a goal or an endpoint that you reach and then stop. Keep playing to the best of your ability and your confidence will always be there to support you.

Twenty is a long list, but chunk them up; 1-3 a week, tackle a bunch, grab all 20 and read, meditate, ponder or examine how you are doing.

Embrace and realize that selfconfidence works just like a

muscle – it grows in response to the level of performance required of it. It can and will grow and you either use it or you lose it.

Full disclosure admission.

Most of the time I am faced with the deadline of writing this Queer-Shift column, the topic kicks me in the ass—because it is something I too need the most. There I’ve admitted it, when I go after a topic with everything I have, it’s about and for me. Sharing my thoughts takes away the selfish feeling. I need to think, write, listen, and do what I am humbly recommending to others. I hope this list gives you some practical life actions that will increase your moxie, hutzpah, embolden your mind, grow the balls, and believe you can do it.

See you in the left moxie lane on the freeway called life. Q

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26 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | GIFT GUIDE

Holiday Gift Guide What do you get a gay who has everything? Take your pick from these ideas, perfect for LGBT foodies, techies, explorers and more.

We like to encourage people to shop locally and spread the love to our advertisers, of course. Did you get married in the past 12 months? You were likely in a hurry and didn’t bother with rings. Perhaps this is the time to share that kind of gift with each other. There are several local JEWELRY DESIGNERS who would help you with the perfect ring that won’t look like everyone else’s.

Check the ads on these pages for hep finding one.

The People’s Market is also hosting their annual HOLIDAY MARKET AT TROLLEY SQUARE. Local artisans will have their wares for you to shop through for that perfect,

unexpected and unique gift.

Our writer Mikey Rox has also put together some of the more interesting things you can buy online, mostly from small businesses, many of which are gay-owned.

ZOOOP ADULT ONESIES Lazy winter weekends are meant for lounging around the house, stuffing your face with your favorite junk foods, and binge watching whatever TV marathon du jour strikes your fancy. Now you can dress the part of a casual-cum-comfortable loafer with fleece jumpsuits from Zooop, hooded, footless adult onesies that feature two sidezipped pockets and a front zipper that spans from head to crotch. A cross between your favorite pair of

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sweats and the iconic union suit (sadly without the butt flap), these onesies come in an array of fun styles, including American Flag, licensed collegiate teams, and a clever “Hangover Tux.” $169-$249; zooopitup.com

BIEDERMEIER TUMBLERS Have someone on your list with seriously expensive taste? You may want to rethink that relationship to stay in the black, but if you’re committed to spending a pretty penny to make him or her happy, the Biedermeier Tumblers from Stillfried Wien are a formidable gift option. These fine hand-painted, enameltechnique glasses feature scenes of high society townsfolk from 1800s Vienna as they wander about in the elaborate

dress of the day. Eight variations are currently available with additional pieces forthcoming to create a collection. $209 per piece; stillfried.com

YELLOW LEAF HAMMOCKS It’s never too early to start thinking spring, and a gift from Yellow Leaf Hammock has relaxation written all over it. Not literally of course, but you can show your true colors with the rainbowcolored, hand-woven hammock that’s sure to bring all the boys to the yard. Gift includes the ‘Hammocking 101 Guide for Easy Hanging’ and a signature tote. $179; yellowleafhammocks.com

people's market

8thannual holiday market Two Saturdays in December December 13th & 2oth

unique products from local artisans

12:00 noon 8:00 p.m.

Trolley Square

(upstairs at top of escalator) 9thwestfarmersmarket.org SUPPORT OUR PARTNERS:

We support the UCCC Winter Market on December 6th (1355 W. 3100 S.)

december 2014 | issue 238 | gaysaltlake.com

THE BACON JAMS If there’s a little piggy on your list this year, surprise him with The Bacon Jams spreadable bacon three-pack sampler, which includes All Original, Black Pepper, and Red Chile & Garlic flavors.

These sweet-and-savory condiments are a fantastic finishing touch to dishes like seared scallops and baked chicken, or create complete appetizers like the Bacon Jam Gorgonzola Flatbread, the recipe for which arrives with the gift. $39.99; thebaconjams. com

TOM OF FINLAND COLOGNE Based on the Finnish artist renowned for his stylized homoerotic fetish art and the indelible mark he left on late 20thcentury gay culture, Tom of Finland Etat Libre d’Orange (a fancy phrase

GIFT GUIDE | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 27

for cologne) layers masculine notes like pine, pepper and cypress between more predominant notes of lemon, suede and musk. A fragrance that transcends sexuality while serving as an ode to the male body, it swings more our way than the other. $90; min.com

MSC SKIN CARE + HOME GIFT SET Well-groomed gentlemen will enjoy the soul-soothing gift sets from MSC Skin Care + Home, which include an allnatural hand-cut artisan soap, soy candle in a reusable glass jar, and a fragrant reed diffuser to spread the holiday cheer all over the house. Available in several sophisticated scents – like spicy Orange, Clove and Cinnamon; seasonal Rosemary and Spearmint; and the warm-andcozy Bourbon Vanilla and Oak (which also happens to be an award winner) – each and every MSC product is made by hand in Brooklyn, New York. $68; mscskincare.com

fun & fr lic consignment shop y o u r r e n e w a b l e r e s o u r c e f o r f u n - l o v i n g , e a s y - l i v i n g g e a r, c l o t h i n g , a c c e s s o r i e s & G I F T S

A l l j e w e l r y 20 % o f f t h r o u g h D e c . 2 4 t h

Includes vintage, locally-made & artisan jewelry

O t h e r g i f t s o n s a l e w e e k l y t h r o u g h o u t D e c e m b e r.

Updates posted on facebook ~ friend us “fun & frolic consignment shop.”

801.487.6393

2066 South 2100 East ─ SLC

NOW ACCEPTING WINER OUTDOOR RECREATIONAL CONSIGNMENT

Details about consigning & our Community & Conservation efforts can be found on the web @ myfunandfrolic.com

28 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | HOLIDAY SHOPPING

gaysaltlake.com | issue 238 | december 2014

Holiday Shopping CONTINUED

IN BLUE HANDMADE LEATHER GOODS Niche men’s accessories are sort of having a moment, and In Blue Handmade is at the forefront of the movement. This #1 handmade leather-goods company on Etsy specializes in stylish travel journals, wallets, belts, flask covers, guitar straps, tote bags and other accessories – and each and every piece is made by 30-year-old Lynn Schroeder, In Blue Handmade’s founder.

These 100% cowhide products are great as stand-alone gifts while others are ideal as stocking stuffers. $14-$45; inbluehandmade.com

VIKING KITCHENWARE The everyday Bobby Flay in your life will appreciate Viking’s new line of professional cookware, cutlery and

bakeware, which is 100% manufactured in the United States. From stainless steel cookware with a unique multiply construction to bakeware coated with a ceramic finish to contemporary cutlery handcrafted from German steel, this trio of culinary staples has the potential to help turn the diner-dining experience you’re used to into five-star cuisine fit

for a Nordic king. vikingculinaryproducts.com

BIG BOTTOM BOXES Gay-owned Big Bottom Market, a unique gourmet food, wine and general store in the heart of the Russian River

Everything from Angels to Zen

63 years of

Christmas Decor 12896 S Pony Express Rd Suite 200 in Draper (just north of IKEA) 801.333.3777 www.ilovelotus.com

Valley of Sonoma County, recently launched a gift box program affectionately know as – what else? – Big Bottom Boxes.

Hey, girl, hey. These handsome gift boxes are brimming with artisanal home and foodstuffs from local Northern California providers with a hint of L.A., and they’re perfect for gifting at any holiday occasion, including brunch, cocktail parties, or formal dinners. $25-$75; bigbottommarket.com

FANTASTIC FITTED TEES There were two apparel companies I discovered this season that I subsequently fell in love with, so it’s only fair that I give them both proper billing as a gift pick. Skip N’ Whistle has an expansive selection of tees ($24.50) featuring statement icons or phrases along with a bevy of other products like messenger bags and ugly Christmas sweaters.

Beardsome, on the other hand, has based its business on a signature style of T-shirt ($25) that features the faceless silhouettes of famous dudes’ beards – and they’re pretty effin’ rad. skipLotusStore nwhistle.com; ruggedlybeardsome.com

december 2014 | issue 238 | gaysaltlake.com

DROLL DOORMATS Your Millennial friends will marvel at the witty doormats from Reed Wilson Design that feature urban slang like

the “Beam” button changes from red to green. Press the button and the video starts automatically. Ain’t the future grand? $49.95 + $3.99 monthly subscription; youbeam.com

HOLIDAY SHOPPING | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 29

Gifts

CHAKRA NECKLACE RAINBOW

“Sup,” “Howdy” and “Holla.”

Inscribed in flock lettering on a coconut-fiber feet wiper, these spontaneous and upbeat greetings are suitable for indoor and outdoor areas. $50; purehome.com

Show off your pride and your sense of style with the Chakra Necklace Rainbow, a mix of colored stones wire-wrapped to create a free-form dangle charm necklace. Handmade and featuring a sterling silver or 14K gold-filled 18.5-inch

Lube

Underwear

YOUBEAM Cut the cable this Christmas with YouBeam, a WiFiconnected device that allows users to plug into their TV and beam free Internet content directly to the set via the YouBeam video browser. Users can surf the Web just like any other browser or type what they’re looking for

Books chain, this fun accessory is available in a spectrum of gemstones or chakras, depending on your partner’s preference.

Items can be gift boxed upon request. $54; etsy.com/shop/ maggiesjewelry

into the YouBeam search bar. When a user finds the video they want (and as long as it’s compatible; that may or may not include those dirty videos you like, by the way),

Housewares

Adult Toys

UNIQUE ARTISAN CRAFTS • One of a Kind • Pendants • Dragons Eyes • Necklaces • Custom Pieces Christian Allred Design 801-906-9881

etsy.com/shop/ChristianADesigns facebook.com/christianallreddesign

• Hand-Painted • Laser-Etched • Color Shifting

OPEN DAILY 10am–9pm 878 East 900 South (801) 538-0606

30 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | Q&A

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‘DIVINE’ INTERVENTION BETTE MIDLER TALKS EARLY LGBT SUPPORT, ‘DIVA’ DEGRADATION, TWERKING AND EQUAL WIG RIGHTS

BY CHRIS AZZOPARDI

Before

the whole world knew her as “The Divine Miss M,” Bette Milder was ours. In the early ’70s, bawdy, belt-y Bette was performing for the NYC bathhouse boys, and don’t think she’s forgotten it, either. “I mean, if I had a nickel for everybody that said they saw me at the baths,” says Midler in our recent interview, “I would be Joe Billionaire by now!”

Midler would go on to global fame, reaching beyond music to become a celebrated name in film, television and on the stage, winning Grammys,

Golden Globes, Emmys and a special Tony Award. And now, the eagerly awaited return of one of show business’s most versatile performers has arrived with the release of her first album in eight years, It’s the Girls!, a tribute to some of the greatest female harmonies in history.

Midler talked about the anticipated tour she’s about to launch in support of this latest effort — and the truck full of hairpieces she’s schlepping along (“Cher has 55 wigs; why can’t I?!”). She also touched on her early support of the LGBT community, the degradation of the word “diva” and her plan to avenge Mae West for sending her a cease and desist.

You know how much we gays love our girls. How much do you keep your gay following in mind when you make music, particularly with It’s The Girls? To tell you the truth, it really didn’t cross my mind.

The music I chose is music I had a lot of affection for.

Some of these songs I’ve known since I was a little girl. I feel like if I have a strong feeling for this music, people will also have a strong feeling for it. The truth is, you cannot pander. You have to go with your gut and your heart and be true to yourself, and hope that people like it.

They generally do.

You were welcoming to the gay community at a time when many weren’t. When you look back at your early support for the LGBT community, what do you recall as being the moment that galvanized you to stand up as an ally? I had been in

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the theater for a long time, from the time I was a young person, and I’d always known gay people — and they were just, like, gay people! Just ordinary friends. People that you knew, and that you never thought twice about. You didn’t think of them as being different, although looking back on my high school years, I think there were a lot of people in my high school — this is so many years ago; this is 50 years ago — who probably were gay and didn’t ever talk about it. As a matter of fact, one of the kids that I went to school with, an enormously popular guy — really funny, really wonderful — who was in my Latin class, wrote me before he passed away from AIDS to tell me that he had been gay and that he had contracted AIDS. So, I mean, what was the moment when I said that it was time to stand up? Oh my god — it never occurred to me not to. These were friends of mine — people that I had worked with, people that I had danced with, people I had broken bread with my whole life — so it never occurred to me not to. You do what you do because there’s nothing else to do. There’s no other option.

But to stand up for people who were seen as pariahs — that was taboo then. Did you experience any backlash for supporting gay people at the time? You know, I might have, but I was very well-protected in those days. I actually did not feel it. I remember the first big benefit that anyone had done for gay rights (“A Star Spangled Night for Rights” in 1977).

I remember the poster, and it was at the Hollywood Bowl. Lily [Tomlin], Richard Pryor and Tom Waits were on the program, but nobody ever said LGBT then. That didn’t exist.

So that night, Tom Waits sang “Standin’ on the Corner” and then Richard Pryor came out and Richard Pryor started off great. I don’t even know if this is in your history books or anything, but he started off great and then worked himself up into a real frenzy as only he could. He said that the gay community had never supported civil rights and, “Where were you when we were riding and they were kicking us to the curb and we were being fire hosed?” Then he said, “You all can kiss my rich, black ass!” and he stomped off the stage. And I had to follow him! I mean, I’m just stripping it bare, but imagine what happened. So I went out and said, “You all can kiss my rich, white ass,” and of course then everything was much better, but it was such a curious evening.

I think Stonewall, in the middle ’60s, was the first time (the gay community) fought back, but, you know, in history everyone says “I was there.” I mean, if I had a nickel for everybody that said they saw me at the baths,

I would be Joe Billionaire by now! I would be playing at Madison Square Garden instead of a rickety-tickety little bathhouse on 73rd Street! OK, let’s move on. I really do think that this big fundraiser in the late ’70s was a little shot across the bow too, and then not long after that, in the middle ’80s, AIDS came down and it was so horrible and, even though he knew so many gay people, Ronald Reagan did nothing. Nothing!

Right — he wouldn’t even publicly acknowledge it was an issue until years later. And hey, Bette, I don’t mean to cut you off, but we’re on a time limit. Oh! I’m sorry. I’m waxing poetic. Anyway, enough about you; let’s talk about me.

If a gay fan approaches you, which of your projects would they most likely mention? You wanna know the truth? Hocus Pocus. Honestly, I cannot believe what happened with Hocus Pocus. I’m just dumbfounded by the number of people who mention Hocus Pocus — and they’re young people!

Was your Halloween costume from this year — when you went as your Hocus Pocus character, Winifred Sanderson — the closest we’ll ever get to a sequel? I tell them all you must write the Walt Disney Company because I don’t have anything to say about it — but they do! (To contact Walt Disney, visit bit.ly/DisneyCorp) But you’d be up for it? Oh yeah. The girls and I have talked about it, and we all laugh and say, “Yeah, we’ll wait for that phone call.” But sure, we would all do it. We had a wonderful time.

It’s the Girls celebrates and honors female performers who branded a very particular image. I mean, they definitely were not twerking. Ugh. I don’t know what to tell you.

I just saw that Jennifer Lopez video with Iggy Azalea — “Booty booty booty...” — and oh, girls, please! What can you say? Girls... please.

How do you compare the girl groups from the era you’re channeling to what you’re seeing now? It was a really wholesome era in retrospect. It was sexy, but it was not blatant. It was intriguing and it was mysterious because it wasn’t flat out in your face.

It was also supremely elegant. You know, I talk about this with my girlfriend Toni Basil, another gay icon: Those voices, the black voices, were not familiar to white ears. They simply never heard those voices singing harmony before. You never really heard those really strong, vibrant black girls singing until The Shirelles, The Crystals, The Chiffons, and then the Motown girls, and the girls who came after: Sister Sledge, the Emotions and down the line. The Honeycombs? Is there a

group called The Honeycombs? I personally wanted to cover (the Weather Girls’) “Two Tons o’ Fun” but everyone said, “No, no, you can’t cut that,” so I didn’t.

You cover TLC’s ’90s pop hit “Waterfalls,” which famously dealt with HIV/AIDS and safe sex. What significance does that song have for you? The first time I heard it I was really struck by it because it seemed like such an important song. To me, it was one of the saddest songs I’d ever heard on pop radio. So, I wanted to do a stripped-down version of it because I really wanted the story to be clear.

I had thought about it for a long time, and when I first heard it, I was so moved by it. I shed a tear myself, and I always use that as a kind of litmus test. If it really moves me, I can bring something to it; I can make it my own.

What about the song in particular hit you?

Did you know the original song was inspired by the AIDS-stricken and promoted safe sex? I do remember that, but it was a dance song. It was for the dance halls. It was for the discos, and yet it really is a song about the mother who can’t do anything, who’s completely helpless in the face of this. I felt that, and that’s the way I wanted to interpret it. I think it worked out wonderfully.

You’ve been a self-proclaimed diva. In fact, your 1997 HBO special was called Diva Las Vegas, and during your Las Vegas spectacle at the Colosseum at Caesars Palace, The Showgirl Must Go On, you said you were the “People’s Diva.” At this point, has the meaning of the word “diva” changed so much that you no longer identify with it? It’s a word that is just so overused that it’s really lost all currency. It no longer has any meaning at all.

Any old slob on the Internet can say, “Well, I’m a ‘diva,’” and have some people believing it, but not me. In the old, old, old, old days — you know, during the Civil War when I was just a child — it meant “the star.” It was an opera term, and it meant a female opera singer who really could carry the whole opera, and it has been so degraded now. It’s a shame because it really was a wonderful word.

What does “diva” mean to you now? It means nothing. It has absolutely no meaning at all. “Divine” still has meaning because there’s still a church, but “diva” has absolutely no meaning at all.

When you hit the road for your first tour in 10 years, how many wigs are you bringing along with you? Oh my god — I have a truck! I have a whole truck. Well, Cher always does. Cher has 55 wigs; why can’t I? To tell you the truth, I have been wearing wigs since, let’s see, the very, very old days. Since I first started making motion pictures — movies!

CONTINUED ON PAGE 33

32 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | A&E

gaysaltlake.com | issue 238 | december 2014

The Gay Agenda CONCERTS A “little orchestra” mingles with a grand orchestra sure to make for an explosive evening.

The talented Jerry Steichen conducts … he’s got a nice brass! The bestest of the best is Kurt Bestor when it comes to crooning holiday melodies, and the men of the Salt Lake Men’s Choir will get your hearts pumping, so get the holiday season off and running with three fantabulous concerts.

18THURSDAY — KURT BESTOR

Abravanel Hall, 123 W. South Temple, times vary, through Saturday. Tickets $20-36, arttix.org

to help miners during their strike of the National Union of Mineworkers in 1984 England.

DANCE The language of ballet presents its version of the classic holiday story, a crowd-pleaser for the whole family. The off-beat language of Derryl Yeager and the amazing dancers of Odyssey Dance Theatre presents its quirky version of the classic ballet.

31WEDNESDAY — 5FRIDAY — PRIDE The Prospector, 2175 Sidewinder Dr., Park City, times vary, through Dec. 7. Tickets $7-8, parkcityfilmseries.com

SPECIAL ENGAGEMENTS

12FRIDAY, 13SATURDAY, 14SUNDAY — SALT LAKE MEN’S CHOIR BEST OF CHRISTMAS

5FRIDAY — THE NIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS

Jeanne Wagner Theatre, Rose Wagner Center, 138 W. 300 South, times vary, through Saturday. Tickets $12, arttix.org

First Baptist Chuch, 777 S 1300 East, Friday Dec. 12 and Saturday Dec. 13 at 7:30pm.

Sunday at 4 p.m. Tickets $10 at saltlakemenschoir.org and from choir members. Please bring a nonperishable food donation for the Utah AIDS Foundation food bank.

17WEDNESDAY — REDUXNUTCRACKER

12FRIDAY — UTAH SYMPHONY PRESENTS PINK MARTINI

MOVIES

Abravanel Hall, 123 W. South Temple, 8pm, through Saturday. Tickets $18-85, arttix.org

Tickets $39-69, box0ffice@ ecclescenter.org

Kingsbury Hall, 1395 Presidents Circle, UofU, 7:30pm, through Dec. 23. Tickets $2040, kingtix.com

Bill Nighy, Andrew Scott and Dominic West star in this film based on a true story. Gay activists work

Hmmm...if I had to only pick one of these shows to see, it would be a daunting task. I mean Michael Jackson, Jane Lynch or a group of circus freaks like on American Horror Story, poor Matt Bomer, these are tough acts to choose from. Well, with MJ being dead and all, and that I’m scared of the circus, I guess I would pick Jane (I do love me them lesbian folk).

26FRIDAY — WHO’S BAD? THE ULTIMATE MICHAEL JACKSON TRIBUTE Egyptian Theatre, 328 Main St., Park City, 8pm through Saturday. Tickets $29-35, egyptiantheatrecompany.org

30TUESDAY —

CIRQUE MECHANICS PEDAL PUNK Eccles Center, 1750 Kearns Blvd., Park City, 7:30pm.

AN EVENING WITH JANE LYNCH

Eccles Center, 1750 Kearns Blvd., Park City, 8pm. Tickets $40-165, box0ffice@ecclescenter.org

THEATRE It’s all about the Plan-B. When I first saw the name Christmas with Misfits, I thought Club Try-Angles was throwing a Xmas party for its staff and clientele. Sorely saddened I was wrong, but hey, the play sounds fun too. Marry Christmas debuts and is directed by my high school classmate -- ohhh, the things we did in that tent!!

-- Jason Bowcutt. Its short run will raise funds for Restore Our Humanity.

11THURSDAY

— CHRISTMAS WITH MISFITS

Studio Theatre, Rose Wagner Center, 138 W. 300 South, 8pm, through Dec. 21. Tickets $20, arttix.org

20SATURDAY — MARRY CHRISTMAS Studio Theatre, Rose Wagner Center, 138 W. 300 South, times vary, through Dec. 23.

Tickets $20, arttix.org

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december 2014 | issue 238 | gaysaltlake.com

801.581.6961 PioneerTheatre.org

Midler CONTINUED FROM PAGE 31

— I’ve always worn wigs. Always, always, always. It really does spare you. It really is a time-saver, and I really enjoy them. And I love makeup and hair. I just love it, love it, love it! I love becoming somebody that I’m not. As they used to say about Mae West: “A little old lady used to come in onto the set and go into the trailer, and four hours later Mae West would come out.” It’s really kind of like that.

A lot of drag queens would agree with you and Mae. What advice do you have for a guy who wants to dress in Bette drag? A good pair of shoes — a really good pair of shoes — because you’ll really hurt yourself. You’ll hurt your joints. And a serious undergarment. And if your panties fall down all around your feet, step out of them and keep on singing.

“The most exhilarating Broadway storytelling in decades!”

THE NEW YORK TIMES

WINNER OF 5 TONY AWARDS IN 2012!

That’s good advice even if you’re not a drag queen. (Laughs) Well, I’ve been accused of [being a drag queen] many times!

But I take it with a grain of salt. To me, it’s a supreme compliment.

You mentioned Mae West, and it was announced in late 2013 that you were cast as Mae in an upcoming HBO biopic. How’s that project coming along? I’ll tell you something: The script just came in, but I haven’t seen it. I’m waiting for the director, Billy Friedkin (director of The Exorcist), to make his notes, and then he’s gonna hand it off to me and we’ll see what happens.

I’m really looking forward to it because I’ve been reading and doing my due diligence. She’s such a fabulous — she’s so fucking nuts! I mean, she was so insane.

And you know, when I started my career all those many moons ago, I used to do an impersonation of Mae West, and I did it on The Johnny Carson Show — my very first Johnny Carson Show — and she sent me a letter telling me to cease and desist, which I swear to god I still have.

I didn’t understand it at the time. I thought, “What’s wrong with her?” Now that I’ve done all the reading and am of a certain age, I totally get it. She was protecting what she had made. She was protecting her creation. That was practically a trademark and she didn’t want anyone to mishandle her creation. Ultimately, she was right. So I bowed to her wishes; I ceased and desisted. And I think it’s so amusing.

(Laughs) After all that, if the script actually comes to the point of doing it, it certainly would be revenge. Take that, Mae! Q Chris Azzopardi is the editor of Q Syndicateand ­chris-azzopardi.com

December 5 through December 20, 2014

Peter and the Starcatcher

By Rick Elice, based on the novel by Dave Barry and Ridley Pearson. Music by Wayne Barker.

34 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | ARTS

gaysaltlake.com | issue 238 | december 2014

DON YOUR GAY APPAREL TWICE THIS MONTH WITH PLAN-B.

Well-known

Utah playwrights Elaine Jarvik and Julie Jensen share their thoughts about creating their LGBTthemed holiday shows for Plan-B Theatre Company.

From Playwright Julie Jensen: It’s always exciting to write something I really believe in.

CHRISTMAS WITH Julie Jensen MISFITS is just such a project. It’s a collection of four short comic plays, about, well, misfits at Christmas. Misfits are all the people left out of the Christmas design, all those people who do not fit the Disney and Coca-Cola notions of a perfect, perfect holiday.

Christmas is really meant for little children with bright eyes and parents with a lot of money. All the rest of us are misfits. How about a couple of gay adolescent nerds, a boy and a girl, who give each other sex for Christmas? Ah, but do they like it? Not much. How about the gay woman in an old folks home who hooks up with a man of her own age for Christmas on the balcony? This, after the man forgoes Christmas with his kids and grandkids. Why? He’s embarrassed by the greed, waste, bad humor.

And why do I really believe in this project? Easy. I really don’t like Christmas. I am embarrassed by it. Yep, by the greed, waste, and bad humor. But I also don’t fit. I’m a misfit and always have been. Every year I get progressively more depressed, starting with the first Christmas carol in the first store about mid-September. As it turns out, I am like many other Americans, maybe even most of us, who duck and cover every year as Christmas approaches. For we are a culture that has designed a holiday we don’t really like, which plants expectations we can live up to.

So in CHRISTMAS WITH MISFITS we spend a few minutes with a representative sample of those who don’t fit.

In the process, perhaps our awareness is broadened and we have more patience for those who are different from ourselves.

We also laugh a bit, too. None of us can afford to take the holiday too seriously.

That will just make us nuts!

From playwright Elaine Jarvik: MARRY CHRISTMAS is a simple boy-meetsboy (and girl-meets-girl) story. You know the kind: Two people fall in love and get married and then the Attorney General asks the Supreme Court to intervene.

As conceived by Plan-B’s Jerry Rapier, the play is a look back at the 17 days last winter when gay marriage was legal in Utah. Because I used to be a newspaper reporter and am now a playwright, Jerry asked me to interview couples who got married during those two and a half weeks and then to write a play based on those stories, from the giddy beginnings

on December 20 to the cliff-hanger ending that still hasn’t been resolved.

I’ve loved talking to these couples.

Take, for example, Shelly Eyre and Cheryl Haws, who’ve been together for nine years, got a marriage license in Provo on December 26, and suddenly discovered that a picture of them kissing was on the national news.

Elaine Jarvik “Most of our friends have never seen us kissing,” says Shelly. “We look like Relief Society ladies.

What I always say is, I don’t know why people are so upset about our lifestyle; my life doesn’t even have a style. My lifestyle is more like yours.”

MARRY CHRISTMAS could have a cast of thousands, because every one of the couples that married last winter has a story worth telling. We hope the ones we’ve picked will give the flavor of those 17 days — the shock of hearing the news, the sense of urgency to get a marriage license before a court stay was issued, the jubilation in county clerks’ offices across the state, the disappointment and jubilation and disappointment again from the court decisions that followed — and the months of limbo since.

Now that the U.S. Supreme Court

ARTS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 35

december 2014 | issue 238 | gaysaltlake.com

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declined to hear the Kitchen v. Herbert.case, many more marriage stories are out there.

And maybe there will be a MARRY CHRISTMAS: THE SEQUEL. Julie Jensen’s CHRISTMAS WITH MISFITS, directed

by Cheryl Ann Cluff, runs December 11-21 — tickets are $20, $10 for students. Elaine

Winner

Jarvik’s MARRY CHRISTMAS, directed by Jason Bowcutt, runs December 20-23 — all tickets are $20 and 100% of the proceeds benefit Restore Our Humanity as they continue to help pay the bills of Kitchen v. Herbert. Visit planbtheatre.org for tickets and more information on both productions. Q

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36 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | A&E

gaysaltlake.com | issue 238 | december 2014

hear me out

Taylor Swift, 1989 Maybe you’ve heard: Taylor Swift has a new album, her fifth, and it’s really good. It’s actually the closest thing to a perfect pop release this year (that’s right: Nashville’s darling has gone full-on ’90s bubblegum), which basically means that, if you’re still resisting the T. Swizzle, it’s time you work on that. Because remember how un-cool it was to get down with the Swifties? Good luck hearing 1989 and not

becoming one.

WELCOME TO NEW YORK Taylor’s New York is as pictureperfect as an NYC souvenir shop postcard, and so what?

This is her Oz. It’s rainbowbright, synth-swathed and Ryan Tedder-produced. It’s also at least partly dedicated to “Friends of Dorothy.” “You can want who you want,” she cheers, liberated by the city’s gaydom. “Boys and boys, and girls and girls.”

BLANK SPACE Anyone who’s pegged Swift as someone who holds onto boys only until she’s written her next hit — this one’s for

you. The 24-year-old’s never been this musically self-aware regarding the public’s relationship-challenged image of her, and it doesn’t hurt that she does so over a playful bounce that bridges the luscious sounds of Lorde and ’80s pop.

STYLE Love is a fashion statement on “Style,” one of those “guess the guy” confessionals wherein Swift wears her heart — and guitaraccented sonic chicness — on her fabulously tailored sleeve.

OUT OF THE WOODS Leave it to Swift to casually chronicle a hospital trip (20

the bookworm sez MY THINNING YEARS: STARVING THE GAY WITHIN’

BY JON DEREK CORTEAU HAZELDEN $14.95 240 PAGES

“You look great!”

When you’re dieting, there are no sweeter words. Losing weight is work, sacrifice and lots of self-control. For sure, it’s not for wimps.

But how much is too much?

Can you shed your past while you shed pounds, too? In “My Thinning Years” by Jon Derek Croteau, you’ll read about gains and losses that have nothing to do with a scale.

From a very young age, Croteau feared his father.

A salesman who traveled a lot, the man was loud, controlling and abusive to the entire family, both physically and mentally. Croteau remembers when he was small and his father screamed at him for singing in front of family friends. When Croteau confessed to playing dress up in preschool, his father withheld food. Years later, after

the family moved from Ohio to the Boston area, Croteau’s father forced him into sports, vowing to “make … a real man” of him.

Croteau fiercely hated sports but played anyhow. He desperately wanted his father’s approval; football, basketball and baseball seemed the way to get it.

But the older Croteau got, the more relentless the abuse became. He started staying with friends as much as possible, avoiding his own home. By then, he’d “internalized” his father’s homophobia and, in doing so, began to fear his own feelings and confusion about his sexuality. He prayed to God to deliver him from being gay. He developed an unrequited crush on his best guy friend.

Disgusted with himself, loathing his father but unable to stop trying to win his love and approval, Croteau became depressed and considered suicide.

He couldn’t, so he began running. When he realized that exercise and weight were things he could control, he ran even more. He cut fat from his diet entirely, then avoided almost all foods and began to starve.

“I knew that my father would

rather I be dead than be gay,” he says. “There was nothing I could do but obey the orders I was given, until I disintegrated into nothingness … and no one was going to stop me.”

In his preface, author Jon Derek Croteau (who obviously lived to tell the tale) says he almost didn’t write this book, until he realized that “My Thinning Years” might inspire others to “let hope in” when faced with abuse for being gay.

For sure, victims who start this emotional rags-to-riches story will know they’re in the company of a kindred spirit because of what Croteau bravely shares. Those heartbreaking recollections make this a hard book to read for anyone (including LGBT allies, who will be horrified) but, at the same time, it’s also hard to turn away from the firm promise of triumph we’ll get in the end. “It Gets Better” was never more apt than here.

If you’ve taken an antibullying stand this year, you will surely appreciate what’s inside this book. It may not exactly be a pleasure read, but “My Thinning Years” is thick with meaning.

The book is available at ­ bit.ly/thinningyears

stitches were involved). Because aside from fun. guitarist Jack Antonoff’s anthemic production, the Polaroid-specific imagery about said accident — and something as seemingly mundane as moving furniture — is a rare pop treat.

ALL YOU HAD TO DO WAS STAY Is that really Taylor Swift channeling your favorite lesbian twins? It sure is. Even down to the synth-pitched “stay,” this Max Martin make sounds like an outtake from Tegan and Sara’s own, equally-dazzling pop transformation from last year, Heartthrob.

SHAKE IT OFF She’s just gonna “shake, shake, shake ... shake it off,” but with its infectious marching-band beat and pointed message to haters, you’re not. You can’t.

And to think you were worried about Ebola.

I WISH YOU WOULD Love conquers all — even petty fights with Taylor Swift. “It’s all good,” Swift expresses, moving on from whatever drama came between her and this ex. All the while, some guitar licks akin to “She Drives Me Crazy” and a synth-infused surge hold you captive, leaving little chance for any kind of momentary parting.

BAD BLOOD The girl-next-door moves in for the kill on “Bad Blood,” cautioning the nameless backstabber(s) about this word called karma.

Note to Swift: You’re really fun when you’re feisty.

december 2014 | issue 238 | gaysaltlake.com

gay writes

Ticket to ride

BY CHRISTINE IRELAND

WILDEST DREAMS She loves cats so much that here, she becomes one. Purring like a sex kitten ready to pounce — what would Reba say? — Taylor channels her inner Lana during a chorus that is undeniably Del Rey-inspired.

She even says “hell.”

HOW YOU GET THE GIRL Tay and her cats obviously spent many a night consuming relationship advice from Cosmo and bopping to Britney Spears’ Oops!... I Did It Again album, and then getting bored by both and switching on the Disney Channel. I mean, how else do you explain this song?

THIS LOVE Fine, Taylor; take my tears.

Take them all. If the feelings-tornado triggered by a cherished scarf on “All Too Well” (from 2012’s Red, her last release) made your heart crack open, this lush little dream expressing relationship realness will have you mopping up the waterworks.

I KNOW PLACES Swift steps into dangerous territory here. Overreaching with an edginess that doesn’t suit her in the first place, its brought-to-you-by-Tedder beat is also worn out — confirmation that you can run, but you can’t hide from a not-great song.

CLEAN And the “Most Unlikely to Collaborate with Taylor Swift” award goes to... Imogen Heap.

Bringing her fantastical brand of folktronica to Swift’s rebirth, the track is proof that there’s nothing the morning sun and a Heap of hopeful electric pings can’t fix. Q Chris Azzopardi is the editor of Q Syndicate and chris-azzopardi.com.

My hands

are cold and shaky as I lift the pipe to my lips and light the bowl.

A deep breath in, hold it; burning and aching just beneath my breastbone followed by tightness in my chest.

“Rookie,” someone says. “She has bronchitis,” says another. I try again.

Lift-off and freedom. Wrapping anonymity around me like an invisibility cloak, the receding world is sliced into parking lots, industrial complexes and roads. Like an airplane leaving the gate, I pull away from my responsibilities. I tell myself I don’t care where I go as long as it’s away from this city.

Dreams of gondolas over paths of dark water fill me, and then I take a trip over Excalibur Hotel & Casino in Las Vegas. At the New York New York, I get my thrills on the world’s first coaster to feature a 180-degree “heartline” twist and dive maneuver.

The city recedes as I move toward the nothingness of the clouds. Below me I see the Great Salt Lake, deep red swirling with orange and wide flats of salt I can nearly taste.

The world is so far away that I can barely remember my ex or dead-end job. I could be anybody, going anywhere. For a moment, the pressure of time is withdrawn. I can visit Santa’s workshop or create a world all my own.

Now I’m afraid. Without all my responsibilities who am I? Beginning my descent, I hear my earthly father’s voice speaking as clearly as if it were yesterday. “Get off that shit!”

Then the author of my soul looks at me with penetrating eyes, “I can’t use you, when you’re high. Moreover the LORD saith, ‘Because the daughters of Zion are haughty, and walk with stretched forth necks and wanton eyes, walking and mincing as they go, and making a tinkling with their feet.’”

Suddenly, my high heels are an offense to me. I’m not sure why I put them on in the first place, I kick them off.

Unable to remember my name, hobbies, tormentors or pleasures, I

look longingly at my so-called friends and ask, “Who am I?” A dim outline of my face is reflected back to me in their eyes. “It’s a round-trip ticket,” says Julie.

“That’s your problem. You need a one-way ticket out of here.”

I swallow hard, but the lump won’t go down. “Try again,” she says and passes the pipe to me.

Lift-off and freedom, again. I pass over the Great Salt Lake and ridged hills until land doesn’t meet sky anymore.

Some question why Robin Williams, who accomplished so much in his life, would take it. Though my own experience holds only momentary glimpses of fortune and fame, my mind can conceptualize various pitfalls and perils as well as rewards associated with celebrity.

I remember reading that Williams entered a rehabilitation program prior to asphyxiating himself. Maybe that was his problem: being clean and sober in an insane world.

Scientists claim the government should invest in meteor detection to prevent earth’s demise. I once thought God was harsh when he cleansed the earth with water and separated the continents in the days of Peleg. Now I know that 75 percent of juveniles in correctional facilities will remain in the system. The most successful alcohol recovery program, AA, claims five percent of its members never drink again. Israel and Palestine have agreed to a 48-hour cease fire.

Whether by meteors, manmade weapons or Christ in his coming burn all the earth’s inhabitants as stubble, all I can say is I’m ready.

People say it doesn’t last, that moment in the sky, but I wrap myself in the dark clouds, stretch my whole body, and cry out in joy—here where time is withdrawn.

I have always wanted to live in the sky. Q

38 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | Q&A

NO HIDING FROM

KIESZA

POP’S NEWEST QUEEN TALKS GAY ROOTS, HOW BABS TAUGHT HER TO SING AND HER HIT SONG ‘HIDEAWAY’

BY CHRIS AZZOPARDI

Even before

making the streets of New York City her own private dance floor for “Hideaway,” Kiesza was courting the queers. The lead single off the 25-year-old’s major-label debut, Sound of a Woman, has certainly boosted her appeal within the community — who could resist the sports bra and suspenders look? — but the gays and this former sniper-in-training for the Canadian Army actually go way back.

On her way to the airport, Kiesza called to chat about pretendmarrying her gay best friend, how Barbra Streisand taught her to sing and her request for the drag queens.

Have you been feeling the gay love yet? I’ve been feeling it before any other love actually. Even before “Hideaway,” when I was doing other projects, the gay community was always the community that supported me as a brand new artist. I always felt supported by the gay community before anyone else, so it’s a really special community to me.

When did you know the gay community was in love with you? I would actually meet the people who were coming to my shows and it showed me who my audience was, and I had a very strong gay following, which is amazing. They’re so enthusiastic, and they come dressed in clothes that emulate my own style. They’re always going the extra mile.

You know you’ve made it when guys are doing you in drag. (Laughs) Yeah, I saw some people doing “Hideaway” in drag, which is amazing. I wanna go to a drag show and see someone performing “Hideaway” live!

What was your introduction to the gay community? My best friend since I was 14 is gay, so my whole teen experience was the gay bars. I mean, when we were obviously old enough. (Laughs) We used to pretend we were married and go out. Through him, I was introduced to the gay community at a very young age.

In school I had a lot of gay friends as well; now that I think about it I really had a lot! I’ve always been immersed in the community and

PHOTO: ANDREW ZAEH

gaysaltlake.com | issue 238 | december 2014

Q&A | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 39

december 2014 | issue 238 | gaysaltlake.com

Anti-Aging & Skincare:

really supportive of it, and also, I always felt really supported by the community.

Even before [I moved to] New York, when I was in Canada and was a folk musician, I had a whole gay following with my folk music. No matter where I went, it was always the gay community that discovered me first.

I feel like they gravitated toward me.

I feel like the gay community is really open-minded and really supportive of new artists and new music and new ideas and just really forward-thinking. As a new artist, because of that mentality, I was just embraced much sooner. The integrity of that community is unbelievable.

Because of your mom, you grew up on big voices like Barbra Streisand, Aretha Franklin, Etta James, and then later Mariah Carey and Whitney Houston.

How did listening to them affect your vocal technique? Without realizing it, I learned a lot about my voice by singing along with them. I didn’t actually learn to sing the way I sing now until I started going to music college and really finding my voice as a songwriter, but I was always singing along [to them] growing up and I definitely developed my voice that way.

“Hideaway” is obviously influenced by ’90s music; how about the rest of Sound of a Woman? Very influenced. Once I wrote “Hideaway,” I had this vision of the whole album being reminiscent of this era. I love the early ’90s, and not just the dance music. I like the R&B. I love all the ballads.

I love the hip-hop. I just wanted to pay homage to an era that I love so much, but also take it and make it current. That was the idea — to have that nostalgia in the music, but also have it be very fresh and new at the same time.

Speaking of the ’90s: ’N Sync or Backstreet Boys? I was a Backstreet Boys girl.

Britney or Christina? Christina.

Whitney or Mariah? Whitney. I mean, Mariah’s an amazing singer, but I was definitely more blown away by Whitney.

There’s one song on the album that a few

people heard her influence on. Next time we talk I wanna see if you can pick it out.

Full House or Saved by the Bell? That’s a hard one! I feel like I was a bit more of a Full House kid. Actually, I was very much a Fresh Prince of Bel-Air kid! I was all about that show.

Destiny’s Child or TLC? Let’s go with TLC. I listened to Destiny’s Child a lot, but TLC had a lot of fashion influence on me.

Growing up, who were some of your favorite Canadian musicians? I was a big fan of David Foster growing up because I was really into songwriting. I actually was more focused on songwriting first, and I was really inspired by all his writing on all of those Toni Braxton songs. Vocally, Celine, and you know also who I really loved growing up? Sarah McLachlan.

You’ve written some songs for Kylie Minogue and also Rihanna, for whom you penned a yet-to-be-released tune that’s said to have a very particular message.

What would that message be? I don’t wanna give away the song, but it reflects the way that people look at the world and the way that people mirror themselves off of other people and live through other people’s eyes.

Which songs on your album do you think have the most powerful message? I feel like every song has its own message.

My album is a love story. To open up and become vulnerable on my first “for real” debut album, I tapped into my own emotions and wrote about what I’ve been through. As a writer, I’ve been writing about all of these topics, but when it came to me, it was very personal. I wanted to open up and tell my own personal stories, so I would say “Sound of a Woman” is a very strong song. I’d say they’re all very honest and vulnerable songs, but “Sound of a Woman” is a standing-up-for-myselfin-my-mind type of song. It’s a song that could really inspire confidence in people.

Chris Azzopardi is the editor of Q Syndicate, the international LGBT wire service. Reach him via his website at www.chris-azzopardi.com.

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40 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | A&E

gaysaltlake.com | issue 238 | december 2014

screen queen Annual Gift Guide

MERRY… HALLOWEEN?

FOR THE NOSTALGIA PEE-WEE’S PLAYHOUSE: THE COMPLETE SERIES For queers of every kind, Pee-wee’s Playhouse was a place to hang without feeling weird about being weird. Subverting heteronormativity with its groundbreaking portrayal of a wildly cartoonish man-boy in a bow tie, actor Paul Reubens’ iconic ’80s character smiled and winked at gay culture (Pee-wee once “married” a fruit bowl), and he had a diverse cast of friends who made every kid feel like they fit in. There was Tito, his buff, shirtless, hot-pants-wearing “Playhouse Lifeguard,” and Jambi the Genie – because everyone knows a gossip queen.

Beyond the characters, kids tuned in for the “secret word,” the catchphrases (“I know you are, but what am I?!”), the zippy Cyndi Lauper-sung opening, and that inimitable Pee-wee giggle. Before Reubens brings his alter ego back to the big screen, as he recently announced, the entire Emmy-winning series – all five seasons of Pee-wee’s Playhouse, spanning eight discs – lands on Blu-ray with over four hours of wonderfully wacky features.

Explore the production design, delight in Playhouse fandom, and get reacquainted with the Pee-wee performers who would forever change childhood.

SLEEPING BEAUTY: DIAMOND EDITION Elsa may be able to turn nothingness into fabulous ice castles with the fling of a finger, but Sleeping Beauty... she... she... yeah, so maybe Sleeping Beauty got the short end of the fairies’ sticks. But now, Aurora is getting some much-deserved respect as Disney awakens her from the vault. One of Walt’s oft-overlooked underdogs – Aurora was always second to Snow White and Cinderella and Ariel and Belle and Jasmine – finally rises from the shadows of her Disney sisters for this dolled-up Diamond Edition, which includes deleted scenes and the bonus “The Art of Evil: Generations of Disney Villains.”

Yup, sorry, girls; she woke up like this.

HALLOWEEN: THE COMPLETE COLLECTION (DELUXE EDITION) The Halloween franchise has had so many reincarnations – and John Carpenter’s original is such timeless cinema – it’s hard to remember when the bludgeoning began. It was 36 years ago when the classic slasher saga first introduced the freakiness that is Michael Myers and made a star out of Jamie Lee Curtis, who played the resilient Myers’ sister, Laurie Strode, and put up a good fight all the way through 2002’s Resurrection (the film was a hot mess and starred Busta Rhymes, so she probably didn’t fight that hard). Other people didn’t stand a chance against the masked maniac (RIP Joseph Gordon-Levitt and your pretty face). Over the years, from 1978 to 2009, nine films – and the bizarrely Michael-less Season of the Witch – have emancipated the unburnable, unstabbable, unshootable, unstoppable Myers to work his knife on Tyra Banks, Michelle Williams, even comedy king Paul Rudd, who’d probably like to forget Halloween 6: The Curse of Michael Myers as much as the rest of us. Undeniably fierce, however, is Curtis’ comeback in H2O, a reliably creepy anniversary affair that’s arguably the best of the sequels. From Starz/ Anchor Bay, the 10-film franchise, including Rob Zombie’s divisive reboots, is together at last on 14 Blu-ray discs (one DVD) with a spate of whatnots: endless hours of special features, a new commentary track with Curtis on H2O and the never-before-released producer’s cut of Halloween 6.

(BOOB) TUBE FAVES TRUE BLOOD: THE COMPLETE SERIES After leaving the funeral business behind and burying Six Feet Under well, six feet under, creator Alan Ball was desperate to sink his teeth into something less grave. True Blood

was a breather for Ball. He would use the show as a platform for timely cultural commentary on the LGBT landscape, equal rights, violence against gays and the quest for identity and build those issues into an insatiable glut of blood, boobs and butts. You couldn’t turn away, and you likely didn’t – the show, which launched in 2008, lasted for seven sexy seasons. So, as if that nude standoff between Eric and Alcide – or the shower fantasy, or the time Eric seduced Talbot, or every shirtless Joe Manganiello scene – isn’t already preserved in all the horny fibers of your head, you now have the power to deploy freeze-frame on 33 discs of vamp camp, Blu-ray beefcake (hi-def abs!) and ample extras. Supplements are season-centric, with faux commercials and episode-specific commentaries. If you make it all the way through the final season’s candid, 15-minute long farewell feature, “True Death: The Final Days On Set,” you’ll know more than you ever cared to about one of TV’s bloodiest, boobiest shows.

THE SOPRANOS: THE COMPLETE SERIES Look at just about any legit “TV That Changed Our Lives” list and there’s The Sopranos, HBO’s celebrated series that has become so part of the pop-culture zeitgeist you can’t say you haven’t seen it without hanging your head in shame. Because even those who’ve been sleeping since 1999, when the show premiered to overwhelming and enduring praise, know this gritty crime drama is about an Italian-American family of mobsters, and that the great, late James Gandolfini created a TV icon. Effortlessly transcending his fictional role, Gandolfini was Tony Soprano.

As head of the Soprano household, and in addition to his complicated relationship with his wife (a terrifically memorable Edie Falco), he finds himself at odds trying to maintain dual roles as family man and ass-kicker. The Sopranos had a successful 86-episode run through 2007, fetching gobs of awards, rebranding HBO as a destination for original, cutting-edge drama and, years later, still carrying a legacy indicative of its cultural influence. And, for all its alpha-male machismo, it was queer-inclusive: In season 2, we meet Vito Spatafore, a gay gangster. This boxed set marks the Blu-ray debut of The Sopranos, and commemorating this hi-def experience is “Defining a Television Landmark,” a new in-depth featurette on the show’s transformative effect on TV.

A&E | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 41

december 2014 | issue 238 | gaysaltlake.com

CLASSICS THE AUDREY HEPBURN COLLECTION Screen legend Audrey Hepburn was spirited, charming and beautiful, and every scene moment – particularly during the height of her film career in the mid-20th century – brought infinite joy to all those hopeless romantics basking in her glow. That divinity (and smile) radiates through these three romantic gems culled for a special Blu-ray set: Sabrina, a warmhearted, Cinderella-hued romance where two men pine for the titular character, played by Hepburn; Breakfast at Tiffany’s, the winsome classic that inspired generations of college women to turn their dorms into NYC-inspired, ’60s-centric pads; and Funny Face, the posh 1957 musical that delightfully pairs the actress with Fred Astaire. Even if there are no new extras – they’re carryovers from a previous DVD release – the films look as ravishing as Hepburn herself.

ERASERHEAD The fear-triggered horrors of fatherhood have never quite seen anything like Eraserhead, birthed from the freakish sensibilities of David Lynch and popular among midnightmovie crowds. Turning heads within the cult circuit since 1977, the Mulholland Drive surrealist’s full-length debut feature descends into the twisted mind of a young man, Henry (Jack Nance), suddenly faced with not just any child but one that appears to have fought its way out of Sigourney Weaver’s stomach. Are we hanging in Henry’s subconscious the whole time? That

ugly baby can’t be real, right? Who knows.

This is Lynch doing what he does best: working your mind and haunting your thoughts.

Finally, Eraserhead is resurrected on Blu-ray thanks to Criterion Collection’s meticulous rendering of the film’s striking black-andwhite aesthetics. Included among the extensive extras are new restorations of six shorts directed by Lynch, an illustrated booklet, and archival interviews and footage dating back to the film’s original release.

FOR A LAUGH 22 JUMP STREET Next Jump Street, Jonah Hill and Channing Tatum will inevitably tie the knot, adopt babies and inspire a whole world of bros to become LGBT activists.

How could they not?

22 Jump Street is so gay the only thing gayer would be if they made their penises kiss. In this sequel to the original reboot, doofus duo Schmidt (Hill) and Jenko (Tatum) are college-bound and facing the challenges of bromance, sassy roommates (please cast Jillian Bell in everything) and words (Jenko confuses “carte blanche” for “Cate Blanchett” – easy mistake). With a seriously funny couple’s-therapy session, a Harvey Milk namedrop and Tatum teaching gay lingo, 22 Jump Street is just two cowboy hats away from being the gayest movie of 2014.

NEIGHBORS Here’s an early Christmas gift, and it’s already unwrapped: Zac Efron’s ripped, frequently shirtless body in Neighbors, a comedy about

a frat (led by Efron and a butt-baring Dave Franco) whose hard-party shenanigans drive their quiet neighbors to react in ridiculous ways. The married couple – Seth Rogen and Rose Byrne – go to awkwardly desperate measures to coax the raucous brats into curbing the noise so they can put their baby boy down. Buffoonery unravels. Robotic boners happen. And stay through the credits to see said tot emulate each cast member, some in drag (the kid does an impressive Lisa Kudrow). Fun with prosthetic penises – based on Efron’s “real cast molding,” according to Christopher Mintz-Plasse – can be found on the bonus features.

OBVIOUS CHILD Suddenly single, Donna Stern (Jenny Slate) is just your average dumpee, self-medicating with wine and casual sex. But when a drunken night of hanky-panky leads to bigger breasts, which leads to a check-up at Planned Parenthood, she finds herself preggers. It’s not your everyday setup for a rom-com, even though it is one (a very cute one, at that), but therein lies its lure: It’s a refreshing spin on a triedand-true formula. With former SNL-er Slate taking lead (this needs to be a thing more often, FYI), even a pro-lifer couldn’t resist the adorable, empathy-inducing candor she brings to Donna. But, also, who doesn’t like a good vagina joke? The 2009 short film that inspired the full-length, a commentary and a making-of are among the extras. Q Chris Azzopardi is the editor of Q Syndicate and chris-azzopardi.com.

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42 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | FOOD&DRINK

food & drink From Scratch From

Scratch is hidden away on Gallivan Avenue behind the Well’s Fargo building, easy to miss even from the Gallivan Center just up the stairs. It would be a mistake to overlook From Scratch, though this shy guy at the end of the bar is packing a big surprise once you take a closer look.

From Scratch isn’t just the restaurant’s name; it’s a chal-

lenge by owner David Brodsky to do as much as possible in house. Catsup, mustard, ricotta, bread; as many things as possible are made in-house.

They even mill their own flour via a custom-built flour mill imported from Austria. When they can’t make it themselves, Brodsky and Chef Ryan Moore try and source ingredients as locally as possible.

The waitstaff is always very nice/friendly and service has been universally excellent. I also really like the ambiance; the space is open and casual, with eclectic chairs and reclaimed wood paneling. If you enjoy watching sweaty men with wooden paddles plunge their tools into a hot hole, you can sit at the bar for a great view of the gorgeous woodfired pizza oven.

If you’ve just come in from

gaysaltlake.com | issue 238 | december 2014

Gallivan’s ice rink, and are looking for a hearty winter starter — the Wood Fired Bread is great, and is the ultimate in “house-made”. Another good winter starter would be the Risotto Cake featuring a nice roasted bell pepper sauce. On the lighter side, the Honey Apple Salad is one of my favorite salads anywhere. A perfect combination of crisp, sweet, and bitter, this arugulaspinach salad features apples, nuts, honey vinaigrette with a delicious drizzle of an Italian grape-must reduction called Saba that will make you moan in pleasure.

The Scratch Burger is simply one of the best burgers in the city. There are no gimmicks here. It’s just a perfectly seasoned meat patty on a delicious brioche bun with some fried onion strings and lettuce.

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FOOD&DRINK | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 43

december 2014 | issue 238 | gaysaltlake.com

CLUCKIN’ $5 WAFFLE

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Great ingredients, treated with care and consideration.

Brodsky set out to have the best pizza in the state. An ambitious goal, sure, but From Scratch does have some pretty formidable pizzas in its arsenal.

The wood-fired crusts have a perfect smoky crispness without being dried and overdone.

A choice like the traditional Margherita allows the crust to shine but I really enjoyed the White Out, which features a light Alfredo sauce, roasted garlic, ricotta, mozzarella, and Parmesan. Get it with a side of balsamic vinegar to drizzle on top. If you’re feeling like some

salty meat in your mouth, the Salumi pizza is a great choice, featuring a selection of Creminelli meats with tomato sauce and house-made (of course) mozzarella cheese.

The highlight of the small dessert selection is the Buttermilk Panna Cotta, a silky Italian custard with a delightful lemon-thyme syrup.

Truth be told, I don’t really care where my flour is milled — but a place willing to put that much time into flour is going to treat the small things with care and consideration — and that just makes for some damn good food. Q

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44 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | COMICS

gaysaltlake.com | issue 238 | december 2014

anagram AN ANAGRAM IS A WORD OR PHRASE THAT CAN BE MADE USING THE LETTERS FROM ANOTHER WORD OR PHRASE. REARRANGE THE LETTERS BELOW TO ANSWER:

IT’S THE GIRLS!

ELM TIT BREED

_____ ______

cryptogram A CRYPTOGRAM IS A PUZZLE WHERE ONE LETTER IN THE PUZZLE IS SUBSTITUTED WITH ANOTHER. FOR EXAMPLE: ECOLVGNCYXW YCR EQYIIRZNBZN YZU PSZ! HAS THE SOLUTION: CRYPTOGRAMS ARE CHALLENGING AND FUN! IN THE ABOVE EXAMPLE ES ARE ALL REPLACED

BY CS. THE PUZZLE IS SOLVED BY RECOGNIZING LETTER PATTERNS IN WORDS AND SUCCESSIVELY SUBSTITUTING LETTERS UNTIL THE SOLUTION IS REACHED. THIS WEEK’S HINT: Q=G

Theme: WORDS OF WISDOM:

ZL MENS UOCWZKP LOBB IEFC OBB OSENCI MENS LKKW, PWKU ENW EL WVKG OCI DKKU EC PZCQZCQ. __ ____ _______ ____ ____ ___ ______ ____ ____, ____ ___ __ ____ ___ ____ __ _______.

PUZZLE ANSWERS ON PAGE 54

december 2014 | issue 238 | gaysaltlake.com

COMICS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 45

46 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | A&E

gaysaltlake.com | issue 238 | december 2014

q scopes

BY SAM KELLEY-MILLS ARIES March 20–April 19 Intense feelings will be the result of a heated conversation with someone close to you. The influence of others may be shaping your attitudes.

Recognize this and make a choice to break the negative feelings you are having. Those closest to you are not always the more positive influences, but recognize their good traits.

TAURUS Apr 20–May 20 After getting a little wet and wild, dry off with some needed relaxation. Let things flow around you and try not to get heavily involved in other peoples issues. Your finances are in need of an audit so take time to look into your spending habits. The time has come to get going on a project you’ve been putting off for a while.

Shakespeare in Drag

48 Heisman Trophy winner Tony 49 Answer to the riddle 51 Michelangelo’s painting and sculpture ACROSS 54 Mishima, for one 1 Manhandle, with 55 Make a hole bigger “with” 59 Eagles, but not 5 Where to have leather bars cybersex 60 Went up 8 Shoe bottom 61 Zipped 12 Engaged in 13 Went without saying? 62 Red planet 63 Gets a butt-whuppin’, 15 Each maybe 16 Prepare for phone sex 64 Prissy hissy 17 Story on the stand 18 Elizabeth of Transamerica DOWN 19 If the Bard had 1 Base for some wreswritten a play about tlers ___ in the Roman 2 Frasier or Niles senate ...

3 Like the Oscars, as 22 (With 23-Across) ... sparkling celebs apwhat would ___ have pear? said to a friend ...

4 Featured player 23 (See 22-Across) 5 Montgomery Clift’s 25 Flying toy ___ River 27 The Untouchables 6 Islamic leader Oscar winner 7 Neuwirth of Chicago 28 “Etta ___” (old comic 8 Homo ___ strip) 9 Where to go with your 29 First in a Latin threefirst mate some 10 Reach of the law 31 ___-sex marriage 11 Clean air gov’t grp.

32 Capital of Venezuela 13 Stroke with an up36 ... when he saw him right stick 14 Music of the the Vilwearing a ___? lage People 44 Still waiting to go out 20 Where to put your 45 Art of Cukor meat, in a deli 46 Daily allowance

21 ___ Francisco 22 Stone film 24 Seed spilled by some farmers 26 Features of Disney’s Dumbo 27 Comedic actor James 30 Where wrestlers lie together 32 Like orange traffic markers 33 Nevertheless 34 Tales 35 Drag queen’s mini, e.g.

36 Type of tent that may be erected 37 Request to Sajak 38 Country est. in 1948 39 Cashes in, as coupons 40 Butt plugs, e.g.

41 Maiden name preceder 42 Std. of a line through Auden’s land 43 Posed for Annie Leibovitz 47 El Prado, for one 48 Cover with cloth 50 Antigay prejudice, e.g.

51 It swallows plastic and spits cash 52 Breakfast on Pluto actor Stephen 53 Seaman 56 Many, many moons 57 Jackie O.’s second husband 58 Came upon ANSWERS ON PAGE 54

GEMINI May 21–June 20 Drill deeper to find the root of a mysterious turn of events in your love life. Things have changed in subtle but distinct ways in all areas of life.

Change is normal but friends, family, and work are rather unrecognizable. Evaluate these changes and determine what needs to be done to be happy with them. Take control and act.

CANCER June 21–July 22 Your values are questioned by a family member who never gets where you are coming from. Pay this person little mind and make your own decisions. A tightening grip comes from a professional associate. Pull away if when things start getting to tense and spend time dedicated to R&R. It is much deserved, Cancer.

LIBRA Sept 23–October 22 Sweet as a lullaby, you’re deepest admirer or partner will provide a calming atmosphere in your life. You’ve been under some pressure lately and if you don’t find some peace, you’re going to pop. Get immersed in some pampering and let the tension melt away. Nothing is worth getting sick over, Libra, so take care of yourself.

SCORPIO Oct. 23–Nov. 21 Everyone around you is buzzing with energy. On the other hand, you are taking some time to catch up on your rest. Some alone time will lead to real explosive epiphanies. When inspiration strikes, don’t let it get away.

A great creative streak will prevail. What you won’t see is an opportunity in your career.

SAGITTARIUS Nov. 22–December 20.

Dark and devious thoughts could occur if you let your mind wonder into forbidden places. Keep focus on what is bright and positive to find life more rewarding at this time. Family gatherings could leave you wondering where your loyalties lie. The more gossip you hear, the more you question their validity.

CAPRICORN Dec 21–Jan 19 Don’t ignore a friend who has been reaching out for a while.

While you might not completely understand them anymore, the association has many positive benefits to offer. Recognition of multiple possibilities regarding your love life will leave you with a choice to be made. Most of them are sound, but prioritize.

LEO July 23–August 22 Your giving spirit will lead to the acquisition of many admirers.

The attention your friends and family provide will leave a perpetual smile on your face. A child or pet will be the source of some frustration; recognize this and find a way to deal with it. No one seems to be paying attention to your plight but rest assured they care.

AQUARIUS Jan. 20–Feb. 18 Reconsider a decision to end a long-term friendship, even if it seems like the right thing to do. Making up after an argument can lead to the kind of passion that only anger can provide.

Get it on and move on. Your best chance to get ahead in career is to appear tough and act gently. There is nothing wrong with a little duality.

VIRGO August 23–Sep. 22 A young person or child in your life has a great idea. The practicality of their idea is flawed, but the basis is not. Use this as a starting point for what could be a rewarding plan. A romantic or emotional involvement has a way of keeping you grounded. Spend time with this person when things get tough. Stress is inevitable.

PISCES Feb 19–Mar 19 Drive the point regarding a matter you are passionate about. There is an audience out there for your message, and they will seek you out to hear it. Growth in a once dormant area in your life is bound to occur. Your best bet is to stick with what you know and implement new developments into your existing foundation. Q

CLASSIFIEDS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 47

december 2014 | issue 238

Qmr. health manners

Move On

BY ROCK MAGEN

As a patron

of the arts, I am constantly reminded how pivotal the lessons taught in theater can be to our lives.

From the comedies that remind us to laugh at ourselves (The Book of Mormon, anyone?) to the stories that captivate us and grip at our heartstrings (I’m sure we can all remember the first time we saw or heard RENT). The words that currently echo in my mind as we end into December are simply, “Move On.” In his musical, Sunday in the Park with George, Stephen Sondheim poetically spells out that we must, “Stop worrying where you are going, move on.”

As his characters admonish each other to move on, they give each other the courage to let go of hurt and push past those things limiting them from finding the happiness they so earnestly seek. So, what is keeping you from moving on?

I have noticed a trend of more and more people who struggle with letting go of those past infractions that plague them. Past lovers, past mistakes, past regrets - all of these things hold us back from reaching our true potential.

Now, keep in mind that I am

not a therapist but I do believe that part of healing is allowing yourself to be healed. A conscious decision to let go is the step that allows for us to heal and push forward on to greater things. It allows for us to love again, to live again, and to find happiness.

Often times we hear differing opinions from those who love us. Some will tell you to take time to heal, others will tell you to brave the storm without any sort of abandon, but I offer you this advice, “If you keep one foot in the future and one in the past, you will be pissing on your present.” Perhaps not the most elegant, but it illustrates that sometimes the hardest part isn’t letting go but rather learning to start over.

To finish the lyrics to Sondheim’s beautiful song, “If you can know where you’re going, You’ve gone, Just keep moving on.” Gays, sometimes you’ve got to know when it’s time to turn the page. Who knows what you will find in the next part of your story? Perhaps a flip of the page will lead to a “happily ever after, “ but we only get there once we move on. Q If you have a question to ask of Rock, email manners@qsaltlake.com

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Off-Leash Dog Parks 48 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | PETS

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gaysaltlake.com | issue 238 | december 2014

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This is a great dog for anyone who is looking for a mature and sophisticated relationship, her favorite afternoon involves tea and the soothing tones of NPR. Getting to know Remi, we have discovered that she is just a hidden ball of confidence, waiting for a family to help her show her true colors and talents. Remi has allowed us a peak into her desires as a dog and found that she enjoys the wonderful sounds of a squeaker toy or splashing and frolicking around in the water. She doesn’t let many see this juvenile side of her but she does know how to let loose and have fun. She will reward your patience with a wonderful wholesome connection and a lifetime of loyalty. Q More info on Remi can be found at BestFriends.org or by calling 801-574-2417.

OUR PETS | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 49

december 2014 | issue 238 | gaysaltlake.com

Can we crash at your place?

TRY FOSTERING!

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50 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | FASHION

gaysaltlake.com | issue 238 | december 2014

You can be an underwear fashion model This photo spread shows just some of the wide variety of underwear available at Spark in Trolley Square. Owner Dale LeBaron has been in the clothing business since he had a store in Payson in the 80s. He opened Cockers in 2001 in Trolley Square and has moved around the valley, returning to Trolley in 2012. “We’ve come full circle,” he laughs. The store has young men’s and women’s clothing as well. “We like to find more affordable designer clothing that is original and high-quality from smaller designers,” said LeBaron, owner of Spark/Cockers.

“And we only order small quantities so you won’t ever run into someone at the club wearing the same shirt.”

PHOTOS: BRYAN MAYNES PHOTOGRAPHY

december 2014 | issue 238 | gaysaltlake.com

Spark is running a “Male Underwear Model of the Year” contest. The winner will receive $500 cash, will be represented by McCarty Talent Agency and receive a free portfolio photoshoot with photographer Bryan Maynes.

To enter, take a maximum of four photos of yourself in form-fitting underwear, and email them to sparkclothing@ yahoo.com with “Photo Contest Entry” in the subject line by Dec. 5.

For more info, go to ­facebook.com/sparkutah.

| 51

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52 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | A&E

gaysaltlake.com | issue 238 | december 2014

the frivolist

9 Reasons Why Coming Out on a Holiday Isn’t a Good Idea

BY MIKEY ROX

Holiday

time may seem like an ideal opportunity to come out to your family — everybody’s in one place at one time and there’s less chance for an individual meltdown in a large group setting — but there are many other variables that should be considered. Coming out isn’t just about you, after all. Your friends and family — because they care about you — are emotionally invested in this matter too, and it’s important to keep that in mind when deciding when to come out. For that reason — and nine others — unloading your burden around the holiday table isn’t the best idea you’ll ever have.

1

THE FOCUS SHOULD BE ON TOGETHERNESS, NOT DIVISIVENESS Even if you think your parents will take the revelation that you’re LGBT in stride and process it responsibly, you can never really be sure how someone else will react.

And it’s not just your parents to whom you’re coming out on a holiday; you’ve got a whole house full of people — siblings, aunts and uncles, and grandparents — who will be part of this event. How will they handle it? How will their reaction affect others’? You can’t be sure, which is why, at least for the day that you’re spending in celebration together, you should keep the secret under wraps. The varied reaction to your news could pit family member against family member, and that’s no way to end an otherwise pleasant gathering.

2

IT CAN BE VERY AWKWARD FOR EXTENDED FAMILY AND OTHER GUESTS While many people present at holiday time will have an emotional involvement in your coming out, not everyone around will be family. Some guests may be friends or neighbors or just acquaintances who have been invited to share in the joint holiday experience. For these folks, your coming out could turn what was supposed to be a benign and jovial occasion into an awkward situation that they can’t escape from fast enough. Keep in mind, too, that if these aren’t your guests, they’re somebody else’s, and you run the risk of embarrass-

ing that person due to your ill-timed and disrespectful disclosure.

3

YOU MAY NOT HAVE ANYWHERE ELSE TO GO IF IT DOESN’T TURN OUT WELL It’s every LGBT person’s worst fear that those who are supposed to love you unconditionally simply do not. Thus, as a result of coming out on a holiday, you could be asked to leave the house — which could put you in a bind if the house in which you’re staying is your only accommodations for this period of time. College students, in particular, should be mindful of this consequence to avoid being shut out in the cold weather typically associated with the Thanksgiving to New Year span.

4

YOUR USUALLY SUPPORTIVE SOCIAL CIRCLE IS OTHERWISE ENGAGED You’ll want to talk about what happened when you came out to your family to those who know you best — your friends — but they’ll be celebrating the holidays with their own families and may not be available.

This isn’t the end of the world if your coming out went smoothly, but if it didn’t go over so well and you need a shoulder to cry on or a supportive ear that will listen, you could be out of luck. This is a potentially dangerous situation, especially if you start feeling like nobody loves you and you have nowhere else to turn. This is not the truth, of course — although it may feel like it at the time — but it can lead to harmful behaviors that can be avoided at a time when you know someone will be there for you.

5

IT MAY BE OFFENSIVE TO OTHERS CELEBRATING A HOLY DAY You may not be religious, but others are — and for those people, a religious holiday is a very important and sacred time in their lives. Notwithstanding what most religions already say about homosexuality (you already have a good idea where this discussion is headed before you even start it), it’s just not good form to actively pursue a controversial conversation when the people you love are recognizing a holy day. Be considerate and wait until the day of observation has passed.

6 7 8 9

THERE’S NOT ENOUGH TIME TO HAVE A SERIOUS DISCUSSION When you come out — no matter the outcome — the people in whom you’ve just confided will generally want to discuss the matter further. Just like it’s not appropriate for them to monopolize the conversation when you have it, it’s also not appropriate for you to come out at a time that you know is not conducive to discussion just so you can avoid it.

IT’S SELFISH TO TURN FAMILY TIME INTO THE ‘ME SHOW’ Your family members didn’t travel far and wide to celebrate the holidays dealing with the aftermath of your coming out. Your decision is personal and serious and special even, and it should be handled as such. If you’d like them to respect you as an LGBT person, you should respect them as people who just want to stuff their faces with turkey and watch a few football games without a live episode of _Dr. Phil_ taking place in the living room.

IT’S NOT FAIR TO DROP A BOMB AND LEAVE SOON AFTER Just like you shouldn’t bring up the subject when you know there isn’t ample time to discuss your sexuality, you shouldn’t come out and leave shortly after. This is a cowardly way of dealing with this issue that will not go away and could become worse if you treat other people poorly during the process. You should be present and available and open when you come out, and if you’re in a hurry — like many of us are on holidays — it isn’t the right moment.

IT’S AN ALREADY HIGHSTRESS TIME OF YEAR The holidays wear us all a little thin, which increases our stress level and heightens our agitation. Do you really want to come out to someone who’s already annoyed that the guests were late, the ham is dry and nobody offered to wash the dishes after the meal? Not unless you have a death wish, you don’t. Do yourself a favor and wait for a time when those to whom you’re about to come out are relaxed and in a good place to have a reasonable and rational conversation and give you their undivided attention. Otherwise, you’re asking for trouble that you can potentially avoid, and there’s no reason you shouldn’t.

Mikey Rox is an award-winning journalist and blogger whose work has been published in more than 100 outlets across the world. He lives in Manhattan with his husband and their cuddle-buddy furbaby. Connect with Mikey on Twitter @mikeyrox.

december 2014 | issue 238 | gaysaltlake.com

SEX | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | 53

Kinky Boots Over the past year, blackBOOTS, a series of private social gatherings for men with leather, kink and fetish interests has been gaining popularity here in Salt Lake City. In fact these social events have become so popular, that it has gone from a once every two months event to a monthly event. Attendees can come, meet, network and socialize with other like-minded, gay, bisexual, homo-flexible and hetero-flexible men into leather, rubber, sports gear, uniforms and various other BDSM, kink and fetish interests.

Michael Sanders, organizer of blackBOOTS, felt that this segment of the gay community just didn’t have the options available to them here in Salt Lake City, unlike the other major urban centers with large LGBTQ populations.

The demand has been strong enough that in addition to private social events, there are now also monthly after-work coffee socials, casual dinners, as well as a series of talks and BDSM/Leather/Kink-themed educational workshops. blackBOOTS is also about to launch a new Leather & Gear Night called CODE at Club Jam, appropriately beginning on Black Friday, November 21, and continuing on the last Friday of each month.

There will be a door policy at this new night of leather, fetish gear, sports gear, underwear, etc. for admission.

WARNING HOT GUYS! Salt Lake City

(801) 595.0005 A strict dress code will be enforced at the door, requiring: fetish gear, gender fuck, harness, latex, leather, rubber, uniforms, underwear or western.

Don’t have gear? No problem, because your underwear will be just fine. A little shy? The minimum requirement is jeans and a black t-shirt.

The following will NOT be allowed: cologne, office wear (slacks, dress shirts, etc.), sweaters, polos, designer-branded clothing, assless gear (Utah law requires that your crack be covered in a place that serves alcohol.)

The group is currently running an online survey at surveymonkey.com/s/55BL6L2 to determine what needs and wants the community has.

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54 | QSALTLAKE MAGAZINE | FINAL WORD

gaysaltlake.com | issue 238 | december 2014

the perils of petunia pap smear

PUZZLE SOLUTIONS

Cryptogram: IF YOUR PANTIES FALL DOWN ALL AROUND YOUR FEET, STEP OUT OF THEM AND KEEP ON SINGING

2 5 1 3 6 8 7 9 4

7 4 6 9 2 1 8 3 5

8 3 9 4 7 5 6 1 2

1 6 3 7 9 2 4 5 8

5 7 4 8 3 6 1 2 9

Anagram: BETTE MIDLER

5 9 3 2 6 8 1 7 4

1 2 4 7 9 3 8 6 5 9 2 8 5 1 4 3 7 6

4 8 2 1 5 3 9 6 7 8 5 2 3 4 1 9 2 7 5 8 6

3 9 5 6 4 7 2 8 1 4 3 6 7 5 9 4 8 6 3 1 2

6 1 7 2 8 9 5 4 3 7 1 9 6 8 2 3 5 1 9 4 7

6 3 8 2 4 1 5 9 7

4 5 2 6 9 7 1 3 8

7 1 9 3 8 5 2 6 4

3 1 2 6 5 9 8 7 4 1 6 3 9 2 5 1 4 8 7 6 3

4 5 7 3 2 8 1 9 6 5 2 8 4 7 3 9 6 2 5 1 8

8 6 9 7 1 4 3 2 5 9 7 4 8 1 6 3 7 5 4 9 2

2 4 1 6 8 3 9 7 5 9 4 1 2 3 6 7 5 8

7 8 4 2 5 9 1 3 6

6 9 7 5 2 1 3 8 4

3 5 8 7 9 4 6 2 1

5 7 4 1 6 3 2 8 9

6 2 8 5 4 7 9 3 1

7 3 5 8 9 1 6 4 2

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strategy of distraction. I would either ask him to hold onto the baby powder bottle while I worked, or I would keep talking to him about anything I could think of to keep his attention from escape.

This particular time I kept exclaiming, “Oh My Goodness!

There is so much poop in this diaper! Oh my goodness! I just can’t believe how much poop is here. Where in the world could all this poop have come from?”

He was just lying there, uncharacteristically quiet. I was mentally preparing my reflexes to counteract the inevitable escape maneuver. When I heard his little voice state matter-offactly, as if how could I be so stupid as to not be able to see and understand this simple concept, “It came out of my bum!” Dumbfounded, and struggling not to laugh out loud, I fell for his stealth tactic, and he successfully performed the escape maneuver. I broke down and ended up laughing so hard, it took me five minutes to catch him and “wrap up the present,” as it were.

I have found that this strategy of distraction works very well with adult gay men as well. In their case it just amounts to flashing them some sparkly objects and their attention is mine. This concept has served me very well in crowded situations. I just turn on the flashing lights on my breasticles and low and behold, it’s as if Moses himself was parting the Red Sea. The blinking breasticles work better than a cow catcher on the front of a locomotive in clearing a path.

Happily, we have all progressed passed the diaper stage, that is, until I begin to require Depends. Sadly, this

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to relief is fraught with danger and excitement.

I had the wonderful opportunity to have the grandchildren visit me this last weekend. Every time they visit, I’m shocked at how quickly they are growing up. We got measuring, and the top of the oldest grandson’s head now reaches level with my fourth chin. Holy crap! How did that happen? It was only one year ago that he was level with my sagging breasticles.

That got me reminiscing about when they were babies and Mr. Pap Smear and I would babysit them for the weekend.

Ever since the first grandkid came home from the hospital, I have been waging a relentless campaign to be the most popular grandparent. I guess to some extent, I have been successful. At this point, I should give a warning about being careful about what you wish for, because becoming the favorite came with unintended consequences. Whenever there was a stinky, smelly, disgusting, no good dirty diaper issue to deal with, all three grandkids repeatedly, without fail, would choose me to be the preferred diaper-duty grandparent.

One time when the oldest boy, who was very verbal for his age, was just a couple of months shy of doing a big boy poo poo in the potty, had a voluminous “number two” incident in his diaper. This particular child had become an expert escape artist. Once the diaper was opened up and the mess was cleaned away, he knew exactly when to throw is leg over the opposite hip and roll away to naked freedom.

I had developed a counter-

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The road

As always, these events leave us with several burning eternal questions: 1. Which is the more astounding, that the grandson is growing up, or that my chins are growing down?

2. If I go on a crash diet, can I make my third and second chins disappear before the grandson’s height catches them?

3. Should I change my name to Potty Pap Smear to reflect the grandkids designation of me being the potty grandparent?

4. In preparation for my future, should I develop for market a sequined adult diaper?

5. Should I name them Petunia’s Panty-Q’s?

6. Should the advertisement say, “Fit for a Size Queen”?

7. Should I patent my blinking flashing breasticles and market them to fire departments to mount them on the front of fire trucks to clear traffic from their paths in an emergency?

8. Just where in hell can a queen hang her purse while doing a number one?

9. What is an appropriate tip to pay a bathroom escort?

These and other important questions to be answered in future chapters of: The Perils of Petunia Pap Smear. Q

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BY PETUNIA PAP SMEAR

I vowed to never ... no, never ever again go potty alone.

may become a necessity much sooner than I might anticipate, because being a queen with a certain modicum of style and grace, comes with some inadvertent potty issues. First and foremost, at events like Pride Day and other festivals, I cannot fit into a Port-A-Potty. My beehive hair is much too tall, and my crinoline petticoats are much too wide and voluminous to even fit in the door, let alone being able to lift it all out of the way in order to “undrink my morning Mountain Dew.” “Committing myself to the Dumpatorium” is just out of the question altogether.

In other public places, such as the casinos in Wendeover, I can only use facilities that have a direct no turn, no obstruction no door approach. When accompanying the Big Gay Fun Bus to Wendover, I have found that at the head of a herd of queens, my blinking flashing breasticles are very effective in clearing the public out of a men’s rest room. However, on one occasion, I left the group and strode unaccompanied across the casino to the men’s room on the far side. Forgetting that there is safety in numbers, I walked inside alone. I approached a urinal, and while “makin’ tea” I heard a couple of rough sounding “gentlemen” exclaim, “What in the Goddamned hell is this fucking thing all about?” At that moment, I decided that going solo might be a dangerous thing, and

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A tale of poop poop pee do

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