QSaltLake Jan 7 2011

Utah’s News & Entertainment Magazine for the Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender Community | FREE

salt lake Issue 171 January 7, 2011

PERSON OF THE YEAR

Brandie Balken

PHOTO BY DAVID DANIELS

PLUS: Queer Guide to Sundance & Slamdance

I

N

T

R

O

D

U

C

I

N

G

T

H

E

Q staff cover Image: David Daniels

busine aiance

The Q Business Alliance is starting up next month and all gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender and ally business owners are invited to join and network with us. Corporations, small businesses, sole proprietors and independent agents are welcome to join, regardless of sexual orientation.

JOIN

US

AT

OUR

december january third iday breakfast first iday social JOIN

US

AT

OUR

AT

AT

FRIDAY

december 17

2100 S 900 E

FRIDAY

january 7

FREE AND OPEN TO ALL QSALTLAKE READERS QSaltLake.com/QBA

assistant editor JoSelle Vanderhooft arts & entertainment editor Tony Hobday graphic designer Christian Allred contributors Chris Azzopardi, Lynn

Beltran, Turner Bitton, Dave Brousseau, Brad Di Iorio, Chef Drew Ellswroth, Greg Fox, H. Rachelle Graham, Bob Henline, Tony Hobday, Christopher Katis, Keith Orr, Petunia Pap-Smear, Anthony Paull, Steven Petrow, Hunter Richardson, Ruby Ridge, Ryan Shattuck, A.E. Storm, JoSelle Vanderhooft, Ben Williams, Troy Williams, D’Anne Witkowski, Rex Wockner contributing photographers Ted Berger, Eric Ethington, Honey Rachelle Graham, Chris Lemon, Brent Marrott, Carlos Navales, Scott Perry, Deb Rosenberg, Chuck Wilson sales manager Brad Di Iorio office manager Tony Hobday

FROM 5:30 TO 8PM MUSIC FOOD, DRINKS, DOOR PRIZES FREE AND OPEN TO ALL QSALTLAKE READERS WINQSaltLake.com/QBA RESTAURANT AND ART GIFT CERTIFICATES PRINTING COURTESY OF PRESENT YOURSALTLICKPUBLISHING.COM COMPANY for more info and an online application to join.

for more info and an online application to join.

publisher/editor Michael Aaron

PRINTING COURTESY OF SALTLICKPUBLISHING.COM

distribution Brad Di Iorio, Ryan Benson, Gary Horenkamp, Nancy Burkhart publisher

Salt Lick Publishing, LLC 1055 East 2100 South, ste 206 Salt Lake City, Utah 84106 tel: 801-649-6663 toll-free: 1-800-806-7357 for general information:

info@qsaltlake.com for editorial queries:

editor@qsaltlake.com QSaltLake is a trademark of Salt Lick Publishing, LLC. Copyright © 2010, Salt Lick Publishing LLC. All rights reserved. No material may

Hansel and Gretel

BY EngELBERT HumPERdInCk

be reprinted or reproduced without written permission from the publisher. Copies of

QSaltLake are distributed free of charge in 200 locations across Utah and in Idaho

QSaltLake.com/QBA

for more info and an online application to join.

and Nevada. Free copies are limited to one per person. For additional copies, contact us at 801-649-6663. It is a crime to destroy or dispose of current issues or otherwise interfere with the distribution of this newsmagazine. Publication of the name or

T H E

B E N E F I T S

Monthly Business Breakfasts

Each third Friday of the month, a themed breakfast will be held at various restaurants in the Greater Wasatch Front with guest speakers and the ability to introduce your business and hand out company literature to other owners and professionals

O F

J O I N I N G :

Monthly After-Work Socials

Meet and mingle with other entrepreneurs and professionals, as well as QSaltLake readers, at different businesses in the valley

Service Guide Ads

Expose your business to thousands of QSaltLake readers with a listing or display ad in the Service Guide on the first Friday of each month.

2 | Q S a l t L a k e | i s s u e 1 7 1 | J a n u a r y 0 7, 2 0 1 1

Online Exposure through QSaltLake.com QSaltLake readers turn to our web site for help finding services in the community.

They can be referred to your web site in a click of a button.

Member Newsletter Promote your business, introduce new products and announce upcoming events to other Alliance members

photograph of any individual or organiza-

Swag Bags Place marketing materials or samples in highly-sought “swag” bags or at tables at large community events through the year More We will be announcing more opportunities for members as the Alliance grows

tion in articles or advertising in QSaltLake is not to be construed as any indication of the sexual orientation of such persons.

Printed in the U.S.A. QSALTLAKE.COM facebook.com/qsaltlake MYSPACE.COM/QSALTLAKE

JANUARY 15, 17, 19, 21 | 7:30 PM & 23 | 2 PM CAPITOL THEATRE Two lost children would be a tasty treat for the evil Witch, but Hansel and Gretel are too clever to be served as dinner. Grimm’s timeless fairy tale comes alive with glorious music, an eerie forest, and mystical woodland creatures.

TICKETS START AT $15. CALL 801-355-ARTS (2787) OR VISIT UTAHOPERA.ORG. Save 20% when you purchase Season tickets to the remaining three 2010-11 opera performances.

Season Packages start at $24 for Monday and Wednesday performances and $36 for weekend!

AVAILABLE NOW THROUGH JANUARY 15!

First Person

KINGSBURY HALL PRESENTS

MOMIX Botanica

from the editor Eleven Resolutions for 2011

by Michael Aaron

I

t’s the new year and all the hubbub is about new year’s resolutions. Well, I didn’t think of any, so I did some research and found 11.

Eleven! Not all of these apply to everybody.

Not all even apply to me. But I think most will.

1

Journal/Blog Bitter is as bitter does. Release all of your baggage from the previous and current years by blogging or journaling. If you’re old school, grab a decorative notebook and write your thoughts freestyle every day. Don’t worry about grammar or spelling. This journal is for you. For the tech kings, create a personal blog.

A vivid landscape of childlike wonder brought to life by a cast of dancer-illusionists.

February 22 | 7:30 pm

2

An EvEning with

n e H P e t S m i e H d Son

An onstage conversation with legendary composer and lyricist Stephen Sondheim and theatre critic nancy Melich.

No More Drama Yes, gay and drama are interchangeable words, but do they need to be? This New Year, gays around the world are making a pact to eliminate the nasty rumors, lost friendships and petty arguments that spice up our everyday lives.

Try a new approach for the New Year: forgiveness.

A more peaceful life can lead to better health by releasing any internalized anger and resentment.

Give others room to make mistakes and trust in the positive aspects of your relationships.

3

Mentor LGBT Youth Why let your life lessons go to waste when you can help guide a young LGBT adult?

There are more out pop culture figures than ever, but nothing beats an in-person role model. Career guidance to life coaching, there are many ways you can help LGBT youth. Start by volunteering for a youth group at the Utah Pride Center or the Homeless Youth Resource Center.

4

Fight for Gay Rights Even if you’re not the flag waving type, there is still an opportunity to help further gay equality. Read this newspaper and activist blogs, sign up for email alerts from Equality Utah, email your state representative and senator about your feelings on issues before the legislature. Even more important — tell people around you what you think. Maybe you’ll sway them and get THEM to write their representatives.

5

Get Tested The anxiety of getting an HIV test and the fear of a life-changing result is overwhelming, but the freedom that comes along with knowing your status is worth the tension. Why leave your health and the health of your partner(s) up to chance?

6

Come Out to Yourself Coming out is a process that unfolds at your own pace. This may be the year for you to be free! The first step to understanding your sexuality is self-reflection. Don’t skip this important step on your way out of the closet. Get to know yourself this New Year and create the life you desire.

7

Shed Bad Influences Bad influences come in many forms: drug and alcohol addiction, sex addiction or even that cute guy who tells you he can’t have sex while wearing a condom. You don’t have to be a victim. Besides, doing drugs and barebacking is so last year! Create a brand new you in a brand new year by kicking an old habit and knowing your boundaries. Recognize your own addictions and test your safe sex practices.

8

Actually Work out at the Gym While some vow they will finally get a gym membership this upcoming year, other veteran gym bunnies resolve that they will actually work out at the gym instead of cruising boys and talking to their friends. Lift a bar bell or two and work on that V. Just make sure you do it for you and not because you want to join the parade of shirtless guys at the club.

9

Volunteer Volunteering is not only fun; it’s an opportunity for you to give back to something greater than yourself. You can also meet other gay people with similar interests. There are many gay organizations that need your help. You don’t need a special talent to volunteer, just your dedication. There are a ton of gay organizations listed in TheQPages. Get one at most bars, restaurants or coffeeshops.

10

Stop Smoking This community is rife with cigarette addiction. It’s almost as synonymous with “gay” as “drama.” I know it’s hard, but maybe this is the year to kick your drag addiction (cigarette drag, that is). But, did you know gay men are at higher risk for lung cancer? This year, break the habit, and reduce your smoky laundry bill.

11

Read More QSaltLake You didn’t think I’d get through this whole article without a shameless plug did you?

Oh, and attend every Salt Lake Men’s Choir concert you can get to. And ride the Big Day Fun Bus. And join the Q Business Alliance. And get your business cards printed at Salt Lick Printing... Q

February 1 | 7:30 pm

Tickets: 801-581-7100 | www.kingtix.com U of U Discounts Available TM

4 | Q S a l t L a k e | i s s u e 1 7 1 | J a n u a r y 0 7, 2 0 1 1

J a n u a r y 0 7, 2 0 1 1 | i s s u e 1 7 1 | Q S a l t L a k e | 5

national news

Quips & Quotes international

by Rex Wockner and Michael Aaron

Court Kicks Prop 8 Case to Calif.

Supreme Court

❝❝

Congratulations, Equality Utah. You’ve beat your deadline by nine days.”

—Change.org writer Brandon Miller, commending Equality Utah’s success in getting 10 Utah municipal governments to pass ordinances protecting lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender residents from housing and employment discrimination last year

by Michael Aaron

On Jan. 4, a federal appeals court asked the California Supreme Court to weigh in on whether proponents of Proposition 8, California’s gay marriage ban, have legal standing to defend it in court.

The Ninth U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals in San Francisco heard oral arguments in the case in early December. Proposition 8 backers appealed Ted Olson U.S. District Judge Vaughn R. Walker’s August ruling that found the law to be unconstitutional.

The named defendants in the case – Arnold Schwarzenegger, as governor, and Governor Jerry Brown, as attorney general – refused to defend the law in court prompting ProtectMarriage.com, the conservative group that put Proposition 8 on the ballot, and Imperial County to step in.

The three-judge panel said that it “cannot consider this important constitutional question” until it resolves the issue of legal standing.

Ted Olson, a lawyer for the plaintiffs, said after the decision went public that proponents do not have the standing to defend the law.

“We are confident that the California Supreme Court will answer those questions fully and expeditiously given the vital importance of this case to hundreds of thousands of Californians who are being discriminated against daily by the existence of proposition 8,” Olson said in a conference call to reporters.

“Everyday that goes by Proposition 8 inflicts immeasurable and incalculable damage on California citizens, including thousands of innocent children,” he added.

Doug NeJaime, an associate professor who teaches Family Law & Sexuality at Loyola Law School in Los Angeles, called the ruling a delay. “[R]ather than get to the merits of the question – whether California’s denial of the right to marry to same-sex couples violates federal equal protection and due process principles – the panel dealt with threshold questions of standing,” he wrote at the school’s blog.

In a separate order, the panel affirmed the district court’s denial of Imperial County’s motion to intervene in the case, saying it lacked legal standing.

During its televised hearing, the court hinted that it was inclined to uphold the lower court’s ruling. But in his concurring opinion Stephen R. Reinhardt, the court’s most liberal judge, said proponents of Prop 8 “have a strong argument” on legal standing.

❝❝

David Cicilline (right), the first openly gay mayor of a U.S. state capital (Providence, R.I.), was elected to the U.S. House of Representatives last November. He takes his seat this month, though he has been in Washington for months for its debate and vote on “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell.” Cicilline watched first-hand—from the House floor—when the repeal of DADT was passed. “Being there was great, wonderful. It made me incredibly proud,” he said. A Democrat, he has served as mayor of Providence for eight years and now represents Rhode Island’s 1st congressional district.

VP Biden: Gay marriage inevitable U.S. Vice President Joe Biden told ABC News on Dec. 24 that the nation will reach consensus on supporting legalization of same-sex marriage.

“I think there’s an inevitability for a national consensus on gay marriage,” Biden said. “That is my view. ... It is evolving. I think the country’s evolving.”

President Barack Obama has made similar statements.

On Oct. 27, Obama told gay blogger Joe Sudbay: “(Y)ou’re right that attitudes evolve, including mine. And I think that it is an issue that I wrestle with and think about because I have a whole host of friends who are in gay partnerships. I have staff members who are in committed, monogamous relationships, who are raising children, who are wonderful parents, and I care about them deeply. And so while I’m not prepared to reverse myself here, sitting in the Roosevelt Room at 3:30 in the afternoon, I think it’s fair to say that it’s something that I think a lot about. That’s probably the best you’ll do out of me today. ... The one thing I will say today is I think it’s pretty clear where the trendlines are going ... the arc of history.”

In a Dec. 22 interview with The Advocate’s Kerry Eleveld, Obama continued: “Joe asked me the same question. ... The sentiment I expressed then is still where I am — which is, like a lot of people, I’m wrestling with this. My attitudes are evolving on this.

I have always firmly believed in having a robust civil union that provides the rights and benefits under the law that marriage does.

I’ve wrestled with the fact that marriage traditionally has had a different connotation.

But I also have a lot of very close friends

6 | Q S a l t L a k e | i s s u e 1 7 1 | J a n u a r y 0 7, 2 0 1 1

who are married gay or lesbian couples.

And squaring that circle is something that I have not done yet, but I’m continually asking myself this question, and I do think that — I will make this observation, that I notice there is a big generational difference. When you talk to people who are in their 20s, they don’t understand what the holdup is on this, regardless of their own sexual orientation.

And obviously when you talk to older folks, then there’s greater resistance.”

The L.A. Times editorial board criticized Obama’s statements Dec. 30.

“The president could spare himself that struggle if he would analyze the issue logically,” the newspaper said. “If he did, he would recognize that it’s irrational, once same-sex couples are given the practical advantages of marriage, to deny them married status. Civil unions, while a vast improvement over the absence of any recognition of same-sex relationships, are almost by definition secondclass arrangements. The temptation is to think that Obama knows this, and that his reluctance to endorse marriage equality is more political than personal.”

Indeed, in early 1996, then-state-Senate candidate Barack Obama wrote to the Chicago gay newspaper Outlines (now known as Windy City Times), “I favor legalizing samesex marriages, and would fight efforts to prohibit such marriages.” WCT has reproduced the letter at tinyurl.com/3aghmsf. —RW

Elton John, partner become parents Elton John and David Furnish became parents Dec. 25. Their son, Zachary Jackson Levon Furnish-John, was born to a surrogate in California. The couple previously tried to adopt a Ukrainian child but were rebuffed.—RW

We would like to have a meeting with them rather than through the media.”

—Ogden Mayor Matthew Godfrey, declining to comment to the Ogden Standard-Examiner on a forthcoming meeting with Equality Utah about passing an ordinance to protect gay and transgender Ogdenites from job and housing discrimination

❝❝

The administration is dragging its feet on purpose. The mayor doesn’t want the ordinance passed.

He wants it to go away.”

—Utah Log Cabin Republicans Vice President and Ogden resident James Humphreys

briefs

Chilean court to rule on samesex marriage Following a referral from the Santiago Court of Appeals, Chile’s Constitutional Court will take up a same-sex marriage case this week.

The court will consider a protection demand from MOVILH, the Homosexual Integration and Liberation Movement, and three same-sex couples who want the nation’s opposite-sex definition of marriage struck down on constitutional grounds.

The lawsuit claims that Chile’s ban on same-sex marriage and its refusal to recognize foreign same-sex marriages infringe a constitutional promise that all people “are born free and equal in dignity and rights” and a constitutional guarantee of “equal protection of the law in the exercise of rights,” among other violations.

Should the Constitutional Court rule against same-sex marriage, activists plan to appeal to the Supreme Court and, if necessary, the Inter-American Commission on Human Rights.

Irish civil-partnership law comes into force Ireland’s new same-sex civil-partnership law took effect Jan. 1.

Couples can unite before a registrar after giving three months’ notice of their intention to tie the knot.

Civil partners receive marriage rights and obligations in matters such as taxes, pensions, property, tenancy, inheritance, alimony, immigration and social benefits.

Justice Minister Dermot Ahern called the law “one of the most important pieces of civil rights legislation to be enacted since independence.”

“Persons in committed gay relationships who wish to share duties and responsibilities now have the choice to register their partnership and become part of a legal regime that fully protects them in the course of that partnership and, if necessary, on its termination,” he said. “The new law recognizes and supports diversity.”

At present, such “crimes” must be disclosed when applying for certain jobs or volunteer positions.

Brits quit God The latest British Social Attitudes survey from the National Centre for Social Research has found that 51 percent of respondents have no religion and 42 percent say they are Christian.

Just 25 years ago, 63 percent were Christian and only 34 percent had no religion.

The gay humanist group Pink Triangle Trust “warmly welcomed” the findings.

“The country has become much less religious and more secular in its outlook,” said PTT Secretary George Broadhead.

“Nevertheless, the powers that be, including politicians and the media -- especially the BBC -- choose to ignore the findings and continue to give special privileges to the churches and other religious institutions as if they had overwhelming support.”

UK to expunge gay sex ‘crimes’

Russian top judge disses Euro court ruling on gays

The United Kingdom is preparing legislation to expunge the “crimes” of adult men who were prosecuted for having consensual sex with adult men in earlier eras.

The slate will be wiped clean for men whose partners were at least 16 years old.

The chairman of Russia’s Constitutional Court, Valery Zorkin, said Dec. 23 that the recent European Court of Human Rights decision that struck down Moscow City Hall’s annual bans of gay pride disrespected Russian sensitivities, especially those

of predominantly Islamic republics within the Russian Federation.

Zorkin accused the Euro court judges of sitting in a “glass building and throwing stones.”

In a group of cases brought by Moscow Pride founder Nikolai Alekseev, the court determined that Moscow’s pride bans violated guarantees of the European Convention on Human Rights and Fundamental Freedoms in the areas of freedom of assembly and association, right to an effective remedy and prohibition of discrimination.

Russia was ordered to pay Alekseev 12,000 euros ($15,928) in damages and 17,510 euros in costs and expenses.

Malta fights trans marriage

Malta’s attorney general is appealing a ruling that transgender woman Joanne Cassar must be allowed to marry her boyfriend.

The constitutional arm of the First Hall of the Civil Court had ruled that European Law and European Court of Human Rights decisions establish the right of post-operative transgender people to enter into an opposite-sex marriage as a member of their new sex.

Cassar is no longer engaged but will continue to pursue the case.

❝❝

Unfortunately, their actions imply the belief that all God’s children are precious, except the gay ones.”

—Provo resident Camille Biexei, wondering why Utah County’s high schools lack gay-straight alliances in a letter to The Salt Lake Tribune

❝❝

Students aren’t looking for a place to discuss sexuality, they’re looking for safe havens from the fartoo-often constant teasing, bullying and harassment which can take place both in school and at home.”

—Pride in Utah blogger Eric Ethington, in response to Utah Eagle Forum member Gayle Ruzicka accusing gay-straight alliances of recruiting students into homosexuality

❝❝

Gay quotas will replace Latino quotas for recruitment. Straight service members who file a sexual harassment case against a gay member will be told to ‘keep quiet’ because ‘we can’t rock the boat’ now.”

—Ogden Resident Brent Smith, predicting what the repeal of Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell will lead to in a letter to The Salt Lake Tribune

January 14-15 Kingsbury Hall Tickets at Kingsbury Hall Box Office, 801.581.7100 or KingTix.com

J a n u a r y 0 7, 2 0 1 1 | i s s u e 1 7 1 | Q S a l t L a k e | 7

Qmmunity

LOCal news

Ogden City still mulling ordinances after 10 months

By Micahel Aaron

Discussion on two proposed nondiscrimination ordinances in Ogden has been going on for 10 months. Drafts of the ordinances were presented to the Ogden City Council in April of last year by James Humphreys, an Ogden City resident and vice president of Utah Log Cabin Republicans. But the city has yet to formally address the measures.

The proposed ordinances would ban discrimination in housing and employment on the basis of sexual orientation and gender identity, similar to those passed in 10 other Utah cities and counties.

“The Ogden City Council has been wonderful to work with,” Humphreys said. “Consistently they have encouraged me and other residents here in Ogden to be patient. I believe we have more Ogden Mayor Matthew Godfrey than enough support to pass these ordinances with the council.”

Humphreys is frustrated, however, that Ogden City Mayor Matthew Godfrey is not accepting dialogue on the issue.

“The mayor has not returned a single phone call or any of my e-mails on this subject. He has preferred to deal directly with Equality Utah and bypass the residents who want this set of ordinances passed,” Humphreys said. “My sources within the administration suggest he does not want these to pass. It is my understanding that none of us that are supportive of these ordinances has had an opportunity to speak directly with him about them.”

Humphreys is hopeful, but unsure, that the mayor would not veto them if passed.

Equality Utah Executive Director Brandie Balken will meet with the mayor on Jan. 7 hoping to clear up legal questions he has regarding the proposed ordinances.

The mayor’s office is declining comment on what issues will be discussed with Balken, except to tell the Ogden Standard-Examiner, “We would like to have a meeting with them rather than through the media.”

Humphreys is concerned that the mayor may propose a resolution that discrimination shouldn’t happen in the city rather than ordinances that levee fines. Balken told the Standard-Examiner that Equality Utah prefers ordinances over resolutions which have “no teeth.”

“We see a resolution as very much like the Golden Rule,” she said.

Councilmembers are waiting on the outcome of the meeting before deciding how to proceed with the ordinances.

Humphreys is unsure what legal issues the mayor’s office has been going back and forth on with Equality Utah leaders. “[The mayor] has raised the constitutionality of these ordinances, but I am unaware of any discussions about this specifically,” Humphreys said.

Standard-Examiner columnist Charles Trentelman called on the city to “quit stalling” and pass the ordinances.

“The Ogden City Council banned the fake drug [called] spice in weeks,” he wrote. “[T]he goal was to send a message, and councilmembers sent it special delivery. Ogden’s efforts

to send a welcoming message to gays is redefining the term ‘snail mail.’ Handcarts have blinding speed compared with these guys.”

Trentelman also quoted Theresa Novak, pastor of the Unitarian Universalist Church, who says the mayor is simply stalling the ordinances.

“Since April, every couple months we’ve tried to ask, ‘What’s the status? What’s the status?’ We e-mail and Facebook the mayor, and he says, ‘Oh, we’re working with Equality Utah,’ and when I talk to Equality Utah, what they say is, every time the city comes with a question, they send a reply, and then the city sends another question,” Novak said.

Humphreys says he is perplexed by the mayor’s reluctance to discuss the issues with him.

“The mayor and I are in the same precinct, so we see each other at caucus meetings,” he said. “He is very easy to talk with about most things, but has been quiet about this issue and I am confused by this.” Q

Brunch and all that jazz will benefit Equality Utah’s work To celebrate its 10th anniversary, Equality Utah will be holding a number of exciting events throughout the year. The first will be its annual Jazz Brunch on Jan. 16. And while the music will be just as hot and the drinks just as cool as in years past, Equality Utah’s staff has planned a few surprises for this year’s celebration.

Rather than the usual roster of speakers (who are typically gay or gay-friendly politicians and community leaders), this year’s event will include the world premiere of a short play by Plan-B Theatre Company resident playwright Matthew Ivan Bennett.

Titled This Is Now, the piece was commissioned to celebrate the statewide gay and transgender rights group’s first decade of working for a fair and just Utah.

Unlike the more formal Allies Dinner held later in the year, the Jazz Brunch is an opportunity for lesbian, gay, bisex­ual and transgender Utahns and their friends, families and allies to learn more about Equality Utah’s work, and its plans for the year, said Brandie Balken, the organization’s executive director. The money from tickets and donations, she said, will contribute to Equality Utah’s operating funds for the upcoming general legislative session, which opens Jan. 24.

Although the Jazz Brunch has typically included speakers, the only person scheduled to address attendees this year is Balken herself. As in 2010 she will be unveiling some of Equality Utah’s legislative strategy for the coming year, which will include ongoing talks with city and county governments to pass job and housing nondiscrimination ordinances that include sexual orientation and gender identity. One of Equality Utah’s greatest victories in 2010 was seeing 10 such ordinances pass in municipalities includ-

8 | Q S a l t L a k e | i s s u e 1 7 1 | J a n u a r y 0 7, 2 0 1 1

ing: Grand County, Logan, Murray, Moab, Park City, Salt Lake City, Salt Lake County, Summit County, Taylorsville and West Valley City.

According to Balken, Equality Utah is now in talks with several municipalities and city governments about similar or­dinances, including Cedar City, which declined to pass the ordinances last year; Ogden, where city council discussion on the laws has been stalled since last spring; and Sandy. Along with its usual lobbyist and delegate training, Equality Utah, she added, is also working on building grassroots action teams in areas out­side of Salt Lake Valley and broadening its training programs to fair-minded Utahns about getting involved in the political process “beyond being a del­egate and going to lobby a legislator.” Throughout 2010, Balken praised citizens in a number of Utah cities for taking initiative to bring the ordinances before local government officials. “[H]aving a conversation with your coworkers or a neighbor is a form of grassroots activism, and [when this happens], I think it will help people see the human face of why these policies and changes are important,” Balken told QSaltLake last year. “A lot of positive municipal decision can be made if we can start to empower people to have these conversations. It then becomes easier to have those con­versations down the road.”

The brunch will be held Jan. 16, 11 a.m.–1 p.m. at The Loft at Squatters Pub, 147 West Broadway (300 South). The premiere of This Is Now will be held at 1:30 p.m. across the street at the Rose Wagner Performing Arts Center, 138 W. Broadway. Tickets are $40 and can be reserved online at equalityutah.org or by calling 801-355-3479 by Jan. 10. The Joe Muscolino Band will provide jazz music. Q

Empathy Line This winter, a new empathy hot line will be launched, which will provide lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer and questioning individuals with resources, support and a listening ear. Currently, the Center is looking for volunteers age 18 and over for a number of tasks, including staffing the line and marketing. For more information contact Tiffanie Cole at 801-696-0074.

Anti-Tobacco Video The Utah Pride Center is looking for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer and questioning Utahns who do not use tobacco products to participate in a photo shoot. The photos will be used in the Center’s new antitobacco campaign. This campaign will seek to educate members of the community about the health risks tobacco use poses to Americans of minority sexualities and gender identities. For more information about the shoot, contact Makeda Meeks at 801-539-8800 ex. 18 or makeda@ utahpridecenter.org.

Life is Grand in Genderland Genderland, the Utah Pride Center’s group for transgender, genderqueer and gender variant youth and their allies, meets every Tuesday at the Utah Pride Center’s TINT youth center from 3–7 p.m. There, youth ages 14–20 can socialize, play games and listen to the occasional guest speaker among like-minded youth who, as the Center explains, “find typical gender boxes too restrictive.” The TINT is located on the Utah Pride Center’s campus at 361 N. 300 West.

Our Store Weekly Specials Our Store: Your Thrift Alternative, a secondhand store run by the People With AIDS Coalition of Utah, will offer the following discounts throughout January: Jan. 8–14 25 percent off all artwork Jan. 15–21 All books $.50 Jan. 22–28 25 percent off all furniture Jan. 29–Feb. 4 25 percent off all dishes All proceeds benefit PWACU’s programs. Our Store is located at 358 S. 300 East. It is open Monday–Friday from 11 a.m.–8 p.m. and 10 a.m –6 p.m. on weekends. For more information visit YourThriftAlternative.org or call 801-819-7884.

You have chosen the perfect day… now choose the perfect caterer

Former Utah Gov. Huntsman hints at 2012 presidential run In a Newsweek interview, former Utah governor Jon Huntsman, Jr., was coy about the possibility of a run against Barack Obama for the presidency in 2012.

“You know, I’m really focused on what we’re doing in our current position,” he told the magazine.

“But we won’t do this forever, and I think we may have one final run left in our bones.”

He declined to comment on the question of a 2012 campaign against Obama, who named Huntsman the U.S. U.S. Ambassador to China ambassador to ChiJon Huntsman, Jr. na in 2009.

Newsweek called the comment a “winking response — about as close to a hat-in-ring announcement as you’ll get from a sitting member of the incumbent’s administration.”

The magazine said the former governor has a “nuanced approach to Republican politics.”

“Warning that the party was losing young voters, [Huntsman] argued that Republicans would need to tack to the middle on three hot-button issues if they were to maintain national relevance: immigration, gay rights and the environment.”

The presidential trial balloon has many gay and lesbian pundits talking, especially in light of his stated support for Equality Utah’s “Common Ground Initiative” and same-sex civil unions.

“Given the current field of would-be GOP candidates, a bid by Huntsman might make sense — he has conservative credentials but is not batshit crazy like many of his would-be opponents,” said Bilerico Project blogger Michael Hamar. “Like Mitt

Romney, Huntsman (should he run) will have the challenge of overcoming his Mormon faith with the lunatic Christianist of the GOP base.”

Utah Log Cabin Republicans President Melvin Nimer said there is a lot of speculation and few real answers on who may run on the GOP ticket next year. He also said that a potential Huntsman bid would largely be determined by how Obama works with the new GOP majority in the U.S. House.

“If [Obama] continues building bridges and finding a good compromise, then I think it would be foolish for Huntsman to run in 2012. Better to wait until the 2016 race,” Nimer said. “However, if the president does what he usually does and tries to play hardball with the economy, health care, immigration, etc., then the game is wide open and the ambassador would have a strong chance of winning.”

As for gay and transgender issues, Nimer feels Huntsman would be a better choice than many potential hopefuls.

“As for LGBT issues, I think that Huntsman would actually be able to do a much better job at bringing about real change than any other GOP contenders or the president,” he said. “Having lived in so many different parts of the world, he has a much broader experience base than anyone else, especially when it comes to LGBT issues. That’s why he came out in support of the Common Ground initiatives and civil unions. If he runs, Log Cabin will certainly support him wholeheartedly, and I believe that most of the LGBT community would also.”

Huntsman is even lauded by liberal gay Utah activist Jim Dabakis.

“Jon Huntsman would make a great president, best of the Republican lot by far,” he said. Q

Goodtime Bowling donates to charities

mas and then four more will be selected at the end of the season.”

Founded in 1990, the league is for Utah’s lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender commmunity, but it accepts everyone and anyone, according to Fraga.

“We focus on diversity and acceptance of not only the LGBT community but also our straight allies,” he said.

Fraga said he joined the league for camaraderie and the fun and the joy of bowling.

“I enjoy meeting new and wonderful people that have different and diverse lives, and also the opportunity to contribute to the community,” he said. “We have competitiveness on our league and passion from its members, and we know at the end of the day no matter who wins or who loses, you can rest assured that the money we pay into the league is going toward good things.”

The Goodtime Bowling League, now in its 21st year, makes annual donations to charities in the state. This year, the league donated a total of $1,750 to four charities chosen by popular vote among league bowlers.

The Utah AIDS Foundation, No More Homeless Pets and Bowl for the Cure–Susan G. Koman Foundation each received $500 and $250 went to a “Sub for Santa” family.

“The entire league is a donation league,” J. Fraga, league president, explained. “Minus the house fees, everything else collected each week goes to an account that gets allocated to several charity leagues twice a year. Four were selected just before Christ-

Distinctive Cuisine

Unparalleled Presentation Meticulous Planning Unique Venues

MENTAL HEALTH COUNSELING

Don R. Austin, LCSW INDIVIDUALS • COUPLES GROUPS • HIV/AIDS CHRONIC DISEASE & GAY ISSUES ADULT MALE SURVIVORS OF SEXUAL ABUSE

801-485-9225

435-649-7503 www.donetoyourtastecatering.com eventinfo@donetoyourtastecatering.com 435-783-3909

Q Tweets @qsaltlake Come visit the toy room All new adult toys

Open Daily from 10am–9pm

878 EAST 900 SOUTH • 538-0606

Look Good, Feel Good!     

1850 S 300 W, Ste. A (Across from Costco)

www.medicruiser.com

Get your dipstick checked (Hormone Screenings) Comprehensive Women's Health Kick the habit (Smoking Cessation, Subxone) Slim your booty (Weight Loss & Nutrition) Now offering BOTOX®, Lip Augments, & Fillers

801.484.5504 J a n u a r y 0 7, 2 0 1 1 | i s s u e 1 7 1 | Q S a l t L a k e | 9

SPORTS

LOCal news

Get on board the T.R.A.I.N. This winter, the Utah Pride Center will offer its LGBTQ Cultural Competency Training Series for individuals, businesses and nonprofit groups seeking to learn more about the needs and challenges lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and queer/ questioning individuals face. One of the Center’s regular outreach programs, the series is named T.R.A.I.N., or Training, Resources and Information Networks.

The three T.R.A.I.N. sessions will be held over the next three months. The first session, Jan. 27, will be LGBTQ 101. This will introduce participants to terminology, language and basic issues pertaining to lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer and questioning individuals, offer information about risk factors this community faces, and provide suggestions for serving and assisting this community. On Feb. 24, LGBTQ 201 will take participants deeper into issues facing members of this community, from the development of sexual and gender identity to working with families headed

by or with LGBTQ members. The final session, March 24, will be Transgender 201, which will specifically focus on the needs of transgender and gender variant individuals, including those who undergo sex reassignment surgery or who are in the process of transitioning sexes.

All sessions will be held in the Utah Pride Center’s Multipurpose Room, 355 N. 300 West, from 9 a.m.-12 p.m. Cost is $35 per person, per training, with an additional $5 for professionals taking the class as part of their continuing education units. The program is approved by the Utah Chapter of the National Association of Social Workers for three such units. It is also recognized by the Society for the Psychological Study of Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender Issues’ Education and Training Committee, which is part of the American Psychological Association. To register or learn more about the training sessions, contact Nick at 801-539-8800 ex. 29 or nick@utahpridecenter.org.

Gay gardeners give to homeless youth With inches of snow covering fallow flower beds and vegetable gardens, members of the Alternative Garden Club have hung up their trowels and taken up fundraising.

Over the winter holidays, the lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender-friendly gardening group collected more than 1,000 items for Salt Lake City’s Homeless Youth Resource Center.

An outreach project maintained by Volunteers of America, Utah, the center serves youth ages 16–22. Over 40 percent of these youth identify as lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer, questioning or “nonstraight.” The center provides a safe location for homeless youth of all sexual orientations and gender identities to eat, shower and launder clothing, and helps its clients with such tasks as obtaining jobs and housing, and seeking medical care. In the last fiscal year, the center assisted more than 830 homeless youth.

The Alternative Garden Club meets regularly and offers lectures, field trips and gardening tips for Utahns of all sexual orientations and gender identities who share an interest in social justice and gardening, horticulture and landscaping. Now in its 25th year, the club also regularly performs service projects such as the clothing drive for the Homeless Youth Resource Center.

For more information about the Alternative Garden Club, visit alternativegardenclub.com.

Center hosts playgroup for gender-variant kids Life is often hard on children who don’t fit neatly into the category of ‘boy’ or ‘girl,’ especially when it comes to making friends.

But thanks to a group at the Utah Pride Center, this aspect of growing up gender variant may be a little less difficult.

Kids Like Me is a playgroup for children that the Center calls “gender exceptional,” and for children whose parents identify as transgender, genderqueer, gender variant or any gender identity that falls outside of mainstream definitions of masculinity and femininity. Its purpose, the Center said, is not to shoehorn children into any particular gender label or identity, but to help

them find friendship and feel less alone.

Kids Like Me will hold an open house on Feb. 12 from 12–1:30 p.m. This will allow parents, guardians and caregivers to inquire about the program before enrolling their children. The group itself meets from 5–6:30 p.m. on the third Wednesday of each month in the Utah Pride Center’s Middle Meeting Room, 361 N. 300 West (the open house will be held in the same location).

For more information about the play group or to make inquiries about the open house contact Rose Ellen Epstein, the Utah Pride Center’s transgender youth programs coordinator, at 801-539-8800, ex.17 or roseellen@utahpridecenter.org.

1 0 | Q S a l t L a k e | i s s u e 1 7 1 | J a n u a r y 0 7, 2 0 1 1

No estate plan? Don’t procrastinate.

Schedule a complimentary session today.

OutGames set for Vancouver in July

Affinity Wealth Solutions Trusted financial guidance for your lifestyle ™

By Brad Di Iorio

Athletes from a number of Utah’s gay and gay-friendly sport groups will have a chance to play and compete against other lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender athletes this July at the North American OutGames, to be held in Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada from July 25–31. This year’s games will feature 18 sports, and will include the Vancouver 2011 OutGames Human Rights Conference. The games also culminate in Vancouver’s Gay Pride Week and Pride Parade on July 31.

The OutGames is the second of two international gay and lesbian sports celebrations. It was created after the Federation of Gay Games moved their 7th Gay Games from Montreal to Chicago in 2006, following differences with the planning committee in Montreal, the city that the federation had originally awarded the Gay Games. The Montreal The Marade is 1.2 miles long, so partici-committee then formed Gay and Lesbian pants are asked to dress for the weatherInternational Sports Association and the Montreal sporting event continued as the and for walking.

Other events include a keynote speechfirst World OutGames. The second World on campus by Dr. Kimberlé Crenshaw Jan.OutGames took place in 2008 in Copenhagen, Denmark. World OutGames III will be held 18 at noon. Crenshaw is Professor of Law in Antwerp, Belgium, Aug. 3–11, 2013. at UCLA teaching civil rights and consti“We really look forward to welcomtutional law. Her primary scholarly intering everyone to Vancouver for the 2011 ests center on race and the law. She was North America OutGames,” said Bradley a founder and leader in the intellectualBostock, vice president of GLISA North movement called Critical Race Theory.America and Host City relations director.

Other speakers will discuss immigration“Vancouver is going to be where it is at for reform and affirmative action. the LGBTQ community this summer.”

GLISA created The North American OutGames as a regional continental sporting event one year after the first World OutGames to help promote the World OutGames and regional continental competitions. Calgary was the host city for the Constance McMillen, who fought for thefirst North American OutGames, and an right to go to her school’s prom with herestimated 400 athletes attended the event girlfriend; mothers of two gay suicide vic-in 2007. tims, Wendy Walsh and Tammy Aaberg; “GLISA is made up of five continental Kelly Glossip who is fighting for survivororganizations,” said Bostock. “If someone rights after losing her partner of 15 years;wants to come from Mexico or Australia, players of the Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell debate;they can participate, but the North AmeriFrank Martin Gill who fought Florida’scan OutGames is being marketed primarban on gay people adopting children; Tedily to the United States and Canada.”

Special events and areas planned for the Olsen, David Boies and the American Vancouver 2011 OutGames are a womenFoundation for Equal Rights for challengonly zone, queer and family-friendly spacing California’s Proposition 8; Azwan Ises, a job fair, the Miss GLISA Pageant and a mail, who recorded an “It Gets Better” vid-week of Pride activities. Team Vancouver eo for all of Malaysia; and Gay and Lesbianwill also host specific events during the Advocates and Defenders for their federalOutGames and Vancouver Pride Week. court victory on the constitutionality of Sports at the North American OutGames the Defense of Marriage Act. include water polo, softball, soccer, tenChange.org is an online activism plat-nis, volleyball, swimming, track and field, form for social change that raises aware-mountain biking, badminton, hockey, golf, ness about important causes and connects10-pin bowling, dance sport, a walk/run people to opportunities for powerful ac-event, and an eco challenge competition. tion. They work with more than 1000 ofDragon boating, a race with 10 paddlers in the largest nonprofits in the world, haveone boat on a 200-meter course, may also be a team of hundreds of journalists and or-an official sport depending on how many entrants sign up. Poker, women’s roller ganizers that span the globe, and empower derby and the Alpine Marathon are under millions of people each month to make a development. difference.

Salt Lake Men’s Choir to sing at Martin Luther King, Jr. rally In commemoration of the contributions of the late Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., the University of Utah and Greater Salt Lake Communities are holding a rally at East High School, ending in a marade (march/parade) to the University of Utah Park Building at 2 p.m. Monday, Jan. 17.

Rally organizers asked the Salt Lake Men’s Choir to perform the national anthem and “Peace Song,” a variation of “We Shall Overcome,” after hearing the choir sing at the opening of the Trevor Southey art exhibit last fall.

Change.org Names Equality Utah ‘Gay Rights Hero of 2010’ Activist Web site Change.org named Equality Utah as one of their top ten “Gay Rights Heroes of 2010” for their work in getting ten Utah municipalities to pass non-discrimination ordinances in housing and employment that include gay and transgender people.

From their site: “Equality Utah: When 2010 started, Equality Utah put forward a bold statement: In 12 months time, they would work like hell to make sure that 10 Utah cities/ towns/municipalities enacted non-discrimination ordinances that included protections on the basis of sexual orientation.

Sure enough, they put their money where their mouth was and got it done. In December, Grand County became the tenth Utah area to enact an inclusive non-discrimination ordinance. And Equality Utah’s work isn’t done yet. Together with other LGBT activists in the state, they have their eyes on Ogden, hoping that the city will become the eleventh in the state to enact sweeping anti-discrimination protections.”

Also named were: Dan Savage and the “It Gets Better” Project; high school student

Lisa M. Winward, MBA, CRPC

®

Wealth Manager & Financial Consultant 1244 Logan Avenue, SLC, UT 84105

801.403.5230

lwinward@sammonsrep.com • www.AffinityWealthSolutions.net Securities offered through Sammons Securities Company, LLC. Member FINRA/SIPC. Fee-based investment advisory services offered through Sigma Planning Corporation, a registered investment advisor.

A LEANER and MEANER

you in just 60 days

Many venues chosen to hold specific events are the same sporting locations where Olympic athletes competed during the 2010 Winter Olympics.

Early registration discounts for OutGames participants will be offered until Feb. 28. Athletes with Team Utah will also receive a GLISA member discount. Additional group discounts apply for every 10 registrants.

Cancellations must be made in writing

by April 30, 2011, and a cancellation fee will apply. Transferring registration is allowed by fax or mailing the transfer information to a specific OutGames address available on their website.

The Vancouver 2011 OutGames Human Rights Conference is a three-day event that will be held at the Sheraton Vancouver Wall Centre, July 26–28. While the conference is still accepting proposals for panels, and speakers have not been announced, the focus of the conference will revolve around specific themes, including youth, seniors/aging, health and well-being, law/ jurisprudence, workplace issues, spirituality, education and sports.

The conference also plans on holding a job fair on July 29, and to give two human rights awards — one to the individual, couple or family, and the second to the corporation, association or federation that has made a significant contribution to promoting gay and lesbian rights. Nominations are being taken until March 15, and forms are available on the games’ website.

Past conferences at OutGames events produced the Montreal Declaration (2006), the Calgary Blueprint (2007) and the Copenhagen Best Practices (2009), and this conference is expected to continue creating positive campaigns or initiatives that apply to the gay and lesbian community as a whole.

Registration discounts for the conference also apply until Feb. 28 for early registration and for those who have a GLISA membership. Sponsorships are still being solicited by the North American OutGames and Bostock also expects concert headliners to be announced shortly. Q

Homeless Youth Resource Center • Street Outreach Program • Daytime Drop-In Center • Transition Home

• 1st consultation free • Private studio workout

655 South State Street Salt Lake City, UT 84111

Steve

801-364-0744

801-688-1918

evolutionstevew@gmail.com

For more information, visit vancouver2011outgames.com.uss.fox@cox.net.

J a n u a r y 0 7, 2 0 1 1 | i s s u e 1 7 1 | Q S a l t L a k e | 1 1

OURVIews

Q on the street

Queer gnosis

❝❝What should the new year’s resolution be for

Dark futures: why ‘TRON’ won’t save us

By Troy Williams

Utah’s lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender community be?”

Michael Sanders

H

yper fictionauts rush to escape the entropy of the Real. Surveillance Spectacle thrives in the service of Fascist Ravers. Sexless 3D simulation engorged by liquid light hallucinations. Sci-Fi liberation cosmology uploaded with sentient ISO-morphic algorithms.

A dark depression descended on me while watching TRON: Legacy. The total sensory overload delighted every neural pathway — but I couldn’t help but question if the intended narrative could liberate either mind or body?

And further, is it ever worthwhile to look to Hollywood to deliver a fallen civilization?

We’ve watched cyberpunk saviors in The Matrix. We’ve hailed the eco-liberation narrative of Avatar. But no one cares to bring liberation out of the theater and into the streets.

Cinematic narratives of pop-rebellion have yet to generate commensurate social movements. But we go regardless, we cheer and we buy the Blu-Ray. We remain entranced by the spectacle and devoured by the hologram. Fractal replications of individuated consciousness.

TRON celebrates digital rebellion while simultaneously mesmerizing the audience into the hallucination of Disney corporate sorcery.

To what end? Thirteen dollars and a wicked IMAX experience.

Outside, away from the theater, our world appears dark and dull. We are still slaves to economic servitude, entranced, overwhelmed and co-opted by the Simulacra. Mundane concerns about escalating rates of global poverty seem somehow ... irrelevant. Worries about extreme weather shifts and cataclysmic climate change? Meh. I covet my own freedom fighter avatar in fetish future chic.

We are citizens of “The Empire of Illusions,” writes former journalist Chris Hedges.

America, Inc. has transferred its allegiance to spectacle and pseudo-events. We can no longer discern what is real and what is illusion. We confuse propaganda with ideology (and entertainment). Hedges warns us that all totalitarian governments thrive within image-based societies. We fight fictional wars with real soldiers (and, can I add, rejoice with incomprehensible revelry when queer people are given the opportunity to bleed and die for the non-truths that fuel every war).

“The flight into self-delusion is no more helpful in solving real problems than alchemy,” Hedges continues in his book Empire

the straight line The value of activism

BY Bob Henline

To live life with self-acceptance, olitically, 2010 was a pretty good respect for ouryear for lesbian, gay, bisexual and selves and others. transgender issues. Proposition 8 End surreptitiouswas struck down in the first phase ness. of the legal battle against it. Don’t ask, don’t tell was not only ruled unconstitutional in a David James federal court, but repealed by Congress. LoBell-Fair cally, 10 municipalities passed anti-discrimActually make ination ordinances that provide employthe golden rule ment and housing protections based upon a conscious gender identity and sexual orientation. thought, and Looking forward, Sen. Ben McAdams, just before you D-Salt Lake City, has plans to introduce are about to say something, make a bill in the upcoming legislative session sure it isn’t disparaging to another that would add orientation and gender identity to the state’s housing and employhuman being. ment laws. Utah’s GOP majority, however, Eduardo has other plans.

Savala In the words of House Speaker-elect Tell my parents Becky Lockhart, R-Provo, to The Salt Lake that I’m gay.

Tribune: “We have been very resistant in the past to doing anything that might make sexual orientation a protected class.

I don’t think it has changed.” Senate President Michael Waddoups, R-Taylorsville, John E. who says he prefers to keep the status quo, Priegnitz indicated that he thinks Sen. McAdams is I would like to “running a risk” by bringing up this issue see our LGBTQ with the Legislature.

Community be a What this means is that we all need to be little more united paying very close attention to our Legislain our efforts of ture this year. We all need to be informed watching out for our interests and about the issues and get involved.

“Never doubt that a small group of taking care of our own. thoughtful, committed citizens can change Brandon Burt the world; indeed, it is the only thing that ... instead of ever has.” succumbing to These words, attributed to Margaret the gloom-andMead, have never been more accurate or doom mindset, more important than they are today. As we let us resolve to start 2011, it is important that we all take a laugh in the face moment to evaluate our beliefs, our prioriof adversity! Bring ties and our individual social and political back camp! agendas.

Peter Zion Living in Utah, it’s pretty easy to concede Control those ad- that lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender dictions! and queer-related issues are always going to be pushed to the sidelines; it’s been that way for years. Senators like Waddoups and Chris Buttars, R-West Jordan, have made careers by pushing a hyper-conservative agenda rife with bigotry and hatred towards a lot of groups. But 2010 gave us a Rikard much different picture of the social and Pearson political landscape in Utah. Municipal Don’t retreat, governments all across the state are passreload! ing anti-discrimination laws that include gender identity and sexual orientation.

This year the Legislature will most

P

of Illusions. “But it is very effective in keeping people from questioning the structures around them that are responsible for your misery.”

But the heavy oppression — the restrictions and exclusions — the tight controls that cry for liberation are mostly economic. The Wall Street collusion with Washington, D.C., the upward redistribution of wealth to the rich and powerful, the disregard for the poor and working class. It’s the game. We don’t resist.

We can’t reset. Protests don’t matter. Elections won’t deliver. We remain passive slaves to the Corporate Age — our new dark era of legalized fictional rule. 3D spectacles transport us into the manufactured vistas of our new epoch.

Only the spectacles can hide us from the dark horrors of reality: Corporate War. Corporate Soldiers. Corporate News. Corporate Religion.

Corporate Profits. Corporate Queers.

We are enthralled by imaginary virtual rebels who challenge fictive authority; while the real radicals are co-opted into mere marketable images; Harvey Milk absorbed onto coffee mugs, tote bags and snow globes. There are dangers in confusing activism with consumerism. The HRC’s creative director boasts, “Each tourist who goes in to buy a Harvey Milk T-shirt is a potential activist!” You gotta sell ‘em hope.

Our dystopian future has arrived. The Washington Post reports how “Top Secret America” now employs “hand-held, wireless fingerprint scanners,” “biometric digital mug shots” and “Predator drones” deployed on the Mexican and Canadian borders. Weapons of foreign wars now patrol American streets.

The Department of Homeland Security and the FBI collect massive databases on ordinary Americans who may have never committed a crime. We now face a global information super-war. The new digital rebels and hactivists harness the arsenal tech to defy the corporate state. But not without costs. Julian Assange faces life in prison. Bradley Manning (another courageous queer soldier) is now quarantined in extreme conditions for allegedly exposing the fictions of war.

1 2 | Q S a l t L a k e | i s s u e 1 76 16 || JOa cntuoabreyr027,8 ,2 20 01 1 0

There are risks to rebellion. There are dangers in challenging the hologram’s awful lies.

While data collectors are recording and monitoring our lives, Silicon Valley entrepreneurs and trans-humanist CEOs are preparing to reshape our cultural DNA with new government “start-up countries,” computers wired to human brains and technology that triumphs over aging. Utopian fantasies abound for the rich and famous. We all seem to be on an uncontrollable collective collision course with tomorrow. But given our yesterday, why should we believe that a corporate-controlled future will be benevolent?

“We must prepare for the violence of a civilization without secrets,” warned the late postmodernist Jean Baudrillard.

America is dying. But not without magnificent spectacles to keep us enthralled as the nation burns wild around us. It’s going to get worse. It will most likely become more violent.

And while our civilization devolves into certain chaos the spectacle will grow even more spectacular.

As we struggle to make sense of our rapidly transforming world, I look forward to a new generation of anarchists, socialists and heretics. I wonder what new narratives of resistance will thrive in 2011. Will our artists, musicians, filmmakers, activists and poets be able to succeed where others have failed? Will they have the power to actually transform society?

Will they show us how to embrace our humanity in its raw, visceral and liberated form?

Will we recognize them when they appear among us?

I turn my attention to the immediate world around me. Salt Lake City. Home of friends, artists, thinkers and rebels. Here is where I offer my resistance. Surrounded by the mountains I love. Defiant, determined and strong.

Our future is still being crafted. I hold the possibility that humanity as a whole may yet surprise us.

Happy New Year. Q

Troy blogs at queergnosis.com.

likely be considering McAdams’ bill, and this will cause backlash from the conservatives. If “We The People” don’t stand up, our elected leaders will make these decisions for us. Do you trust them to do the right thing? I don’t.

Now is the time to make the Legislature understand. This is the time for everyone who believes in equality, who supports civil rights for all to become involved, to

be a part of that thoughtful, committed citizenry that can change the world.

“Every LGBT citizen and ally has the power and the responsibility to make the change they want. One person willing to get involved is worth 30 silent citizens,” said Eric Ethington of Pride in Utah.

And he’s right. What we’ve seen over the past year emphasizes that Utah’s citizens are recognizing the importance of equality.

It’s our legislators who don’t get it. Ethington continues, “Our great state is quickly recognizing the value of treating every citizen as equals, not just the majority. The legislature must recognize the voices of their constituents or face the consequences.”

But communicating that message is up to you. It’s going to take more than the voices of a few writers and activists. It’s

going to take time and energy from everyone who believes in equality. Lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer people and straight allies alike will need to make their voices heard on Utah’s Capitol Hill this year, not only if we hope to pass statewide protections, but also if we want to prevent the Old Guard from undoing the progress of the past year.

Are you ready to change the world?

Ethington is planning a rally for the opening day of the legislative session, which is Jan. 24. For more details about this rally or how you can help during this session, you can email me at bob@nonpart.org. Q

Bob Henline is a straight man. Don’t hold that against him — he was born that way. He is also a professional author and editor. His blog can be read at nonpart.org.

mountain meadows mascara Resolution for the year: pay attention!

by Ruby Ridge

H

appy New Year kittens! As Senior Drag Matriarch and loving Den Mother to you all, my first official act of the year is to hereby decree that 2011 shall hereafter be known as the “Year of Reality and the Possible.” And here’s why. ... After all of the election year bullshit that was 2010 (dishonest ads, scare mongering, and the living nightmare that was Sarah Palin with a Twitter account), it is imperative that this year be based in facts, pragmatism and the real world. Sadly cherubs, given the slate of new ideological conservatives filling legislatures and offices nationwide, I think keeping our politicians and community leaders grounded is going to be a full time job for all of us. So we really need to pay attention.

Just this morning (the first business day after the New Year’s break), I read four separate articles about how Representative Chaffetz and Senator Lee were going after the Obama administration. Not about what they wanted to build, accomplish, or collaborate on in government for the benefit of the American people, just what they wanted to tear down and their plans for revenge. Then there were all of the articles about their Republican colleagues who plan on opening up all sorts of investigations and budget hearings to scuttle last year’s health care reform and discredit the president before the state of the union speech. Nothing about immigration reform, the costs of the Afghanistan War, or

the crippling levels of unemployment and financial insecurity. Nope it was all about hammering the president’s popularity in preparation for a Republican run at the White House in 2012. Really? Is that the Republicans idea of “Country First?”

We, of all people, should be the first ones in there standing beside minorities and standing up for what’s right and what’s possible I still need someone to talk me down off the ledge after Orrin Hatch blamed the Democrats (mainly the President) for not passing immigration reform last year.

Seriously Orrin? And how many decades have you been in the Senate? How many administrations both Republican and Democrat have come and gone, while you sat on your hands doing nothing about immigration? But after Senator Bennett gets

bumped off by extreme right wingers, you suddenly get indignant about Mexicans?

How conveeeeenient!

Now petals, I know I am a big time nerdy policy wonk who gets totally revved by local, federal and international politics, but darlings you really need to get excited about this stuff too. OK, I’m not going to force you to be excited about all of it, but at least be aware of the issues that impact us and our allies.

Might I suggest that your first object of interest be the Utah State Legislature who are fast tracking some type of immigration message bill this session. At this point we don’t know what it’s going to look like, but petals we need to be vigilant that it doesn’t devolve into some hateful law that simply targets a powerless minority just to keep the ultra-conservative ideological fringe happy, while doing nothing practical to solve the problem.

We should never forget that the LGBT community in Utah was that targeted and powerless minority for decades, and we should never forget how dehumanizing it was, and how bleak and hopeless it sometimes felt. So when it comes to any issues of equality and fairness, like race, orientation, poverty, or whatever, we of all people should be the first ones in there standing beside those minorities and standing up for what’s right and what’s possible.

OK, I shall now descend gracefully and regally from my soap box and put a burrito in the microwave, because all of this conviction and optimism has given me the munchies. Ciao, babies! Q

You can see Ruby Ridge and the Matrons of Mayhem in all of their polyester glory at Third Friday Bingo (every Third Friday of the month at 7pm) at First Baptist Church (777 South 1300 East).

J a n u a r y 0 7, 2 0 1 1 | i s s u e 1 7 1 | Q S a l t L a k e | 1 3

our views

I

lambda lore Utah: small but proud and brave

By Ben Williams

n 1987 there was a March on Washington to protest Bowers v. Hardwick, in which the Supreme Court ruled that the Constitution didn’t guarantee a right to privacy for gays and lesbians. Seventeen years later, the court reversed itself on the 1986 landmark decision and declared all sodomy laws unconstitutional.

In October 1987, I felt compelled to go to Washington to be a part of the protest. So I and a friend, Mark Lamar, took a transcontinental train to Washington, D.C. We had booked no lodging and had just a little money, but we had a lot of courage and gumption, and the knowledge that we would be OK once we got there. And we were.

The following is just a snippet from my journal I kept during that event. A much more detail account of my adventures as a gay activist in D.C. that month was printed in the November 1987 issue of Triangle Magazine.

“The Ellipse [a circle of ground between the White House and the National Mall] was where everyone was gathering for the march in full view of the White House and the Washington Monument. There was a stage platform in the center of the Ellipse where huge speakers allowed music and Gay empowerment rhetoric to permeate the air. Everywhere you looked there were banners, flags, pennants and signs. Truly a mighty sight indeed. We were like an army with banners.

It was absolutely marvelous to see the thousands and thousands and thousands of gays and lesbians assembling for this march.

“The Ellipse was filled with hundreds of thousands of people getting in marching order by regions of the United States. California, New York and Texas were their own region. California’s delegation, I found out later, had an estimated 50,000 marchers alone.

“Colorado, of the Rocky Mountain region, had close to 1,000 people in their group. Utah should have been listed as part of the Rocky Mountain region. However, both Nevada and Utah were left off the program all together! Arizona had nearly 100 people as did New Mexico, which had an impressive flag drill team which twirled their beautiful yellow state flag.

We Utahns sandwiched ourselves in between Arizona and New Mexico, with their consent, since we knew many of these people from the Desert and Mountain States conferences.

“These are the 20 people who I saw representing Utah in the March on Washington: John Bennett, Chair of the Gay and Lesbian Community Council, Michael Aaron, David Nelson, Nancy, John, Guy Larsen, and Cory Cozza, all from the Royal Court, Chris Brown, Joe Dewey, Ragnar McCall,

his friend Steve, and Val Mansfield all from LGSU [the University of Utah’s Lesbian Gay Student Union], Steve Oldroyd, John Bush, Mark Lamar and myself. Two more gay guys, who I didn’t know, one who was on crutches, and two lesbians later joined us on route because they used to live in Utah.

“There may have been more people who joined us but not much more. Other Utahns who marched under different contingencies were Rev. Bruce Barton, Bruce Harmon and Bob McIntier who all marched with [the Metropolitan Community Church]. Jon Butler

We may have had only 20 participants but you would not believe the reactions we were getting from the crowds just because we were there. and Tony Feliz marched with Affirmation [Gay and Lesbian Mormons]. Then of course there was Mel Baker, formerly of KRCL’s Concerning Gays and Lesbians who was now with the National Planning Committee. Every state in the Union was now represented this time; unlike 1979 when Utah was not represented at all.

“Mark Lamar and I wore our University of Utah sweatshirts, as did most of the Utah contingency who wore some type of sweatshirt with ‘Utah’ emblazoned on it. We were all so excited, so hyped and we managed to acquire a gay rainbow flag, and I managed to snag some posters from the National Anti-Violence Task Force which had ‘Utah’ written on them. So from virtually nothing, we were able to pull together a respectable showing.

“We had no pretty state flags, no large signs or banners, but people were stopping to take pictures of the Utah group. It was like no one could believe that anyone would dare show up from Utah because of the perception that Utah gays are so oppressed that it was a blooming miracle that we were even there.

Utahns being in the march meant that gay civil rights could bloom even in the harshest of conditions. As some encouraging soul shouted at us, “Utah — small but proud and

1 4 | Q S a l t L a k e | i s s u e 1 7 1 | J a n u a r y 0 7, 2 0 1 1

brave!” That is how we all felt.

“The march began at noon, led by Whoopie [sic] Goldberg pushing a friend of hers who has AIDS in a wheel chair in front of the People With AIDS delegation. An hour later we still hadn’t moved. The marching order was by geographical regions starting with the Pacific Coast area first so we had to wait for California, Oregon, and Washington. Over loudspeakers we heard that by 1:30 the first marchers had reached the Capitol. We didn’t begin to move until 2 pm.

“We may have had only 20 participants but you would not believe the reactions we were getting from the crowds just because we were there. As we began to file out along the march route all you could see, as far as the eye could see, was a flowing movement of humanity carrying banners, state flags, posters etc. Marching band music filled the air and later chanting “Want do we want?”

“Freedom!” “When do we want it?” “Now!” Spectators crowded along the route, hanging from trees, on steps of buildings and everywhere cheering.

“As Utah marched by, we had our spirits lifted by kind souls shouting “Utah! Glad you’re here!” The Arizona contingency before us was chanting “Recall Governor Meacham” so not to be out done; Michael Aaron led us in chanting “We’re sorry about Hatch! We’re sorry about Hatch!” People were laughing with us and saying along the way, “We forgive you!” “It’s not your fault!”

“We’re sorry too!” Then Michael came up with a new chant. “We’ll fight, we’ll scratch to get rid of Orrin Hatch!” Steve Oldroyd added this ditty “Right now we’re here Mormon Tabernacle Queers.”

“Eventually Bruce Barton and Bruce Harmon and Bob McIntier joined our Utah procession after the Fellowship of Metropolitan Community Churches had reached the Capitol, joined by two lesbians so that Nancy didn’t have to be the sole woman marcher.

“We reached the end of the march at the Capitol after two hours. The sheer number of people was overwhelming and we were at the front of the parade! Still behind us was Texas, the Central States, Illinois, New England, New York, the Mid-West, and the South East! It was a long march. I started to hear that a half an [sic] million people were marching. The Metro cops estimated conservatively 650,000. It was phenomenal and indescribable. How does one describe a once in a lifetime experience? I don’t think I have the ability to capture in words the magic, the feeling of unity, pride, excitement of this historic occasion. Dykes, queers, faggots, lesbians, bisexuals, leathermen, sissies, all marching in unity, strength, and numbers to proclaim that we are here and we are not going back in to the closet! It’s our time for freedom and dignity.

“As so many speakers commented “The Constitution is our protection too!” We are part of ‘WE the people.’ Five bigots on the Supreme Court shall [not] take away the freedom of 25 million people.”

These were the memoirs of a gay Utah activist in 1987. Q

snaps & slaps SNAP: Change.org Too often, people whose experience with Utah consists mostly of catching Sister Wives or Big Love reruns think that our state is just some horrible, backward place where lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people are nonexistent or so silenced that we might as well be. And too often, Utah makes the national news only when the LDS Church says something hateful about queer people or throws its weight behind an anti-gay referendum or two. That’s why Change. org’s naming of Equality Utah as one of 2010’s top gay rights heroes is so astounding. Last year, Equality Utah got 10 Utah municipal governments to protect all residents, regardless of sexual orientation or gender identity, from housing and job discrimination, thus giving ¼ of Utah’s population recourse against anti-gay and anti-transgender landlords and employers. By placing Equality Utah alongside such national headliners as Dan Savage, who founded the powerful “It Gets Better Project,” and the activists behind Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’s repeal, Change.org helped thousands of people understand just how big and important Equality Utah’s success was in 2010. Now if only the State Legislature would understand that, too.

SNAP: 2011 It may have just begun seven days ago, but don’t let 2011’s wide-eyed innocence fool you; the General Legislative Session is just a few weeks away from opening. With legislators already grumbling about all our hard work last year, we can’t afford to be on the defensive. We’re going to have to fight hard not only to make more gains this year, but to protect the ground we gained in 2010. Whether lobbying on the Hill, helping homeless queer youth, call-

THE SEAWEED IS ALWAYS GREENER FEBRUARY 5 DEBUSSY’S LA MER | 8 PM ABRAVANEL HALL AFTER PARTY | 10 PM CAFFÈ MOLISE Eastern romanticism meets visual impressionism in this duo-themed concert. Debussy’s vastly important work La Mer will sweep you away with its beautiful depiction of the sea; especially when paired with the exotic influence of Mozart’s Overture to The Abduction from the Seraglio and Bartók’s Violin Concerto No. 2.

FOR $35 VIVACE TICKETS, CALL 801-533-NOTE (6683) OR VISIT USUO.ORG/VIVACE

ing on councilmembers to pass fair housing and employment ordinances, or just turning up when needed for rallies and protests, let’s all come together to make this another fabulous year for our community.

J a n u a r y 0 7, 2 0 1 1 | i s s u e 1 7 1 | Q S a l t L a k e | 1 5

By Christopher Katis

I

On the other hand, Mom could cook; left alone, Dad and I would likely starve to death within a couple of weeks.

And although I’ve got the cooking down, I discovered a couple of weeks ago that the boys and I would certainly have our world turned upside down and inside out without Kelly at the helm of our family’s life.

It all happened when Kelly came down with the flu.

Suddenly, I found myself trying not to panic as I fumbled my way through the kids’ regular routine. There I was, a guy perfectly comfortable navigating the waters of the corporate world, desperately looking for some type of compass as I tried to get two boys ready for bed. It was when I contemplated releasing the guinea pigs into the wild so they’d have a fighting chance of survival that I recognized just how deeply over my head I was.

What really floored me was how com-

If you have “tendencies”

towards buying a new house..

801-755-1794 NMLS ID # 223160

801-971-2574 NMLS ID #243253

801-703-8325

NMLS ID #103926

1 6 | Q S a l t L a k e | i s s u e 1 7 1 | J a n u a r y 0 7, 2 0 1 1

Only Kelly takes care of me. And more importantly, he takes care of my kids. Our kids.

No, I’d be lost without him because he shows his deep love for me in a way that no one else ever has. Other guys have sent me flowers. Other guys have told me they think I’m good looking. Other men have even said they love me. But only Kelly takes care of me. And more importantly, he takes care of my kids. Our kids. I know it’s hard for some people to believe, but there’s nothing any-

Don’t let “temptation” keep you from using the best.

&WHITE Gala

Black

5

15th Street Gallery, 1500 E. 1519 S., Slc

SaTURDaY, JaNUaRY 15, 2011

7pm-midnight. $25 at door/$20 prepaid at www.swerveutah.com Awesome Raffles & Entertainment!

Dress: black &/or white semi-formal or fancy dress Includes beer, wine, soda & hors d’ oeuvres

Mistress of ceremonies: comedienne karen Bayard sWerve is is anan affiliate of:of: SWerve affiliate

UTAH PRIDE CENTER serving the gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender community

MUSIcal pERfoRMaNcES BY: “Honey” & leraine Horstmanshoff Talia keys & Mary Tebbs “Gemini Mind”

8

’m becoming my dad. And not so much in the ways I’d like. I mean, I think it’d be great if I could check the pistons in my car’s engine or plumb a new toilet.

But let’s face it, that’s never going to happen. I don’t even know if my car has pistons. Or what they do, for that matter.

No, I’ve discovered that like my father before me, I’ve become completely reliant on the person I married for my basic survival needs.

When I was a kid, one of my buddies’ parents divorced. Although he ended up living with his mom, he told me that the judge had actually consulted him about whom he preferred to live. That made me wonder if I was ever asked to pick, whom would I choose?

Believe it or not, it wasn’t a very easy hypothetical choice for me to make. On the one hand, Mom was the disciplinarian; Dad let me get away with a lot more.

SWerve’s Party of the Year

8

Without him I’m lost

one could do that I’d find sexier than that.

I hope there are equally mundane things I do for our kids that make Kelly’s heart go pitter pat, too. After all, I did inherit a lot of great parenting skills from my dad. At least to me they were pretty great.

Long before some child psychologist coined the term “quality time,” my dad was making sure that we had fun together — just the two of us. Every night after work we’d do homework or play a game.

On Saturdays we’d go “bumming” together — looking around hardware stores or auto part shops, just hanging out. I cherished that time. And now that I’m grown up I take my kids “bumming,” too (No, we don’t spend a lot of time looking for car parts!).

I help with homework. And every Friday night, we pop a big bowl of popcorn, hunker down on the couch and watch a movie — just the boys and me.

When I think about it, our house mirrors those of the families we both grew up in.

That’s why I find it so ironic that society considers us non-traditional. Yet, we’re actually probably one of the most traditional families you’ll ever run across, which, yeah, is a bit weird.

And I admit, the longer I’m a parent, the more I see my dad in me. In hindsight that makes sense: we learn how to be dads from our own fathers.

I’m just thankful I haven’t started wearing socks with sandals. Q

8

who’s your daddy?

pletely and totally reliant I am on Kelly to run our household and make our family work — though, to be fair, he’s totally reliant on me to put food on our table and a roof over our heads. And I hate to admit it, but it took his getting the flu for me to really recognize just how lost I would be without him. And not just because he knows where we keep the guinea pigs’ food.

8

our views

visit our student spa esthetics: the art of enhancing the face and body both physically 801.530.0001 and psychologically

skinworks.edu

Ready for healthy changes and new beginnings?

our views

Gay and Lesbian Mental Health Services • Gay Men’s Support Group • Individual, Couples, Group Counseling • Gay Men’s HIV/AIDS Support Group • Substance Abuse Support Group

PET GROOMING ON 15TH & 15TH

creep of the week John McCain

By D’Anne Witkowski

‘T

pridecounseling.tv Pride Counseling

124 South 400 East Suite 230 Salt Lake City, UT 84111

801.595.0666

oday is a very sad day,” sighed a doddering and out of touch John McCain on the day Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell was finally repealed by Congress.

Oh, shut up, McCain. Your completely indefensible and fear-mongering position lost. Suck it.

“I hope that when we pass this legislation that we will understand that we are doing great damage,” McCain said before the vote.

The only great damage that the DADT repeal is going to do is to McCain’s reputation. He’s staked his claim to the wrong side of history. As DADT’s staunchest defender in the face of possible repeal, he’s made himself the George Wallace of this issue.

What’s especially unseemly is McCain’s complete about-face.

While today he stands with the anti-gay rightwingers he’s so capriciously aligned himself with, three years ago he was Mr. “DADT repeal is fine with me so long as the top brass are cool with it.”

“I listen to people like Gen. Colin Powell, former chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, and literally every military leader that I know. And they testified before Congress that they felt the Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell policy was the most appropriate way to conduct ourselves in the military,” McCain said in 2006. “But the day that the leadership of the military comes to me and says, ‘Senator, we ought to change the policy,’ then I think we ought to consider seriously changing it because those leaders in the military are the ones we give the responsibility to.”

But of course, as soon as “the leadership of the military” was cool with it, McCain was not.

McCain went out of his way to insist that DADT was “effective” policy, and that only military folks who agreed with him were worth listening to.

“They’re saying if it isn’t broke, then

don’t fix it,” McCain said. “I understand the other side’s argument because of their social-political agenda, but to somehow allege that it has harmed our military isn’t justified by the facts.”

What exactly does McCain mean when he calls DADT “effective policy?” Effective at what? Ruining people’s lives? Punishing members of the military who are doing a job the vast majority of Americans are too chickenshit to do? Coddling members of the military who think that gay people are too “icky” to work alongside?

And how does kicking trained personnel out not harm the military?

In 2007 McCain said, “We have the besttrained, most professional, best-equipped, most efficient, most wonderful military in the history of this country. There just aren’t enough of them.”

Did he mean there just aren’t enough straight ones?

It takes a lot of time and money to turn a new recruit into a fully trained member of the Army, Navy, Air Force, or Marines. And yet we’ve been kicking service members out simply because, say, he’s a soldier who doesn’t get turned on by big jugs, or she’s a soldier who does.

That’s the policy McCain has been so rabidly defending?

As Joe Sudbay of AmericaBlogGay wrote, “They’re on the front lines, putting their lives on the front lines for the rest of us.”

By saying that repealing DADT is simply another notch in the belt of some “socialpolitical agenda” McCain is essentially saying to the thousands of gay and lesbian service members who have lost their careers under DADT, “You’re worthless.”

In the end it’s McCain himself who is worthless. A man who once seemed to have a shred of integrity but who now barely clings to a shred of dignity after he’s sold out his career trying to appease the antigay right. It looks like that isn’t exactly “effective policy.” Q

801-466-6100

1508 SOUTH 1500 EAST HOURS: TUES – SAT

8:00AM–5:30 PM

• Avoid the Holiday Rush and make your Grooming and Boarding Appointments now!

• Prep your dog for winter weather with our full range of Hypo-Allergenic Shampoos & Conditioners, suitable for every kind of dog and coat.

• We offer Low Dander and De-Shedding Treatments for families with Seasonal Allergy Problems • We stock Locally Made Cold Weather Sweaters for Small to Large Dogs (with sensible openings for a full range of motion and comfort) • Enjoy the new Fall Season Collections of Up-Country Collars and Leashes (Made in the USA)

‘I hope that when we pass [the repeal of Don’t Ask Don’t Tell] that we will understand that we are doing great damage’

Claiming Our Power Creating Community Queer Spirit is about men loving men, gathering together in loving and intimate ways to explore, dialogue, dream and celebrate the “who” and “what” we are through; 3-day weekend retreats, workshops, trips and monthly gatherings.

1 8 | Q S a l t L a k e | i s s u e 1 7 1 | J a n u a r y 0 7, 2 0 1 1

Info & registration: www.queerspirit.org

801-557-9203

Sponsored Project of White Crane Institute www.gaywisdom.org

J a n u a r y 0 7, 2 0 1 1 | i s s u e 1 7 1 | Q S a l t L a k e | 1 9

PERSON OF THE YE AR

2 0 | Q S a l t L a k e | i s s u e 1 7 1 | J a n u a r y 0 7, 2 0 1 1

Person of the Year: Brandie Balken

tive to see these ordinances put in place.

“You don’t have to look any further than Ogden to see the incredible difference that residents have made,” she said.

“Not only has it been an immense amount of work, it has also been incredibly satisfying to see residents get involved in a meaningful and impacting way.”

Had only nine, or seven, or just three municipalities agreed to protect all citizens from discrimination, Balken said that the goal of bringing 10 communities on board was never about the number itself.

“Even if Grand County [the 1oth to pass the ordinances] wouldn’t have passed them it would have been a win,” she said. “It was less about the numbers and more about, for me, would we have the conversations and do the work we had set out to do.”

friendly legislators during the 2008 general session. While all failed to make it out of committee, Equality Utah structured its current municipal government strategy on the initiative’s groundwork.

“I have found that most Utahns are fair-minded and goodhearted, and it gave us an opportunity to build relationships,” Pappas continued. “It is through our relationships that we realize just how much we have in common. When people are given an opportunity, in large measure, they will move toward fairness.”

Pappas called her tenure at Equality Utah “some of the most fulfilling, inspirational and best work I have ever done,” and said that she was glad to be leaving the organization at such a good time in its 10-year history.

every hateful legislator and anti-gay organizer up on The Hill.”

And while Williams doesn’t ultimately think the stunt was successful, thanks in part to the press’ confusion, he nonetheless admires the radicalism behind the faux press conference.

“I don’t think the LDS Church would have ever met with Equality Utah, the Pride Center and [Milk screenwriter] Dustin Lance Black if we weren’t all out there with our kiss-ins and temple marches. That’s all integral to the fight,” he said, referring to a kissing protest held in 2008 after LDS security kicked a gay couple out of its Main Street Plaza.

“But radicalism is more than just angry marches,” he added. “Radicalism is a worldview of systemic change. It’s radical to stand against war. It’s radical to dismantle patriarchy. It’s radical to fight for fair wealth distribution to benefit the poor and working classes. This was the spirit of the first queer radicals that comprised the Gay Liberation Front and Queer Nation (and so many other groups). They wanted more than just marriage and military service. Those were the institutions of global oppression that needed to be fought.”

Honorable Mention: Troy Williams

Honorable Mention: Eric Ethington

Every year, the messy milieu of Utah culture and politics presents us with several heroes and villains who challenge the state’s lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and queer community to be strong, cohesive and vocal about their rights. Rarely, however, has QSaltLake seen such a dynamic year as 2010, and never have there been so many possibilities to choose from when naming ‘Person of the Year.’ So, after receiving dozens of suggestions and scores of Facebook comments on Q’s nomination post, it became necessary to also name several honorable mentions and other persons of notability.

T

he lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender community’s most significant victory of 2010, the passage of 10 local ordinances forbidding housing and employment discrimination based on sexual orientation or gender identity, was not only the work of one person, but of many people from Equality Utah’s dedicated staff and volunteers, to hundreds of residents who attended council meetings on the ordinances. Yet, the face and much of the drive behind them was Equality Utah Executive Director Brandie Balken.

When Balken learned that she was going to be named Person of the Year, she said that she was elated — but surprised. Nonetheless, in her first year helming the state’s largest gay and transgender rights organization, Balken not only helped many Utah communities begin difficult discussions about sexual orientation and gender identity, she was also instrumen- Often, board members are the unsung heroes of any organizatal in getting many of those communities to turn discussions into action. Just days before tion. They put in long and unpaid hours doing everything from Christmas, Balken and Equality Utah saw their dream for 2010 become a reality: the passageorganizing fundraisers to soliciting donations. Sometimes, of 10 ordinances protecting lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender Utahns from job and they even take time out of their vacations to convince a mayor housing discrimination. According to estimates published in The Salt Lake Tribune, these that his or her city should protect lesbian, gay, bisexual and ordinances protect a fourth of the state’s population. transgender residents from discrimination. Such was the case “I think it was a huge undertaking to do this kind of groundwork,” said Balken, a former with some members of Equality Utah’s board, which has been Interiorscape Specialist with Cactus & Tropicals, and who penned a gardening column for lead for three years by the incomparable Stephanie Pappas. this newspaper in 2006. “We found ourselves out among the state more than we’d ever Under her watch, the organization has pushed for statewide been, and it was some of the most rewarding work we’ve ever done. Sometimes it’s easy to housing and employment protections, adoption laws and get disenfranchised working with the [Utah State] Legislature, but working on a local level domestic-partner arrangements that would not exclude with councils and mayors [to pass protective legislation] gives people more direct access to people on the basis of sexual orientation or gender identity. It politicians, and their voices do make a difference. ” also hired Brandie Balken as executive director following Mike Balken was quick to add that she alone could not have made such a difference for so Thompson’s departure, which Pappas said was “a stroke of many Utahns; rather, she said that Equality Utah’s staff and volunteers were instrumental in genius on the Board’s part.” getting city and county governments to consider such protections. Staff, she said, worked “During my time as Chair, I participated in the development together in holding town hall meetings and talking about the ordinances with fair-minded and launching of the Common Ground Initiative. It was wonmembers of city governments, and EU board members frequently took time out of vacations derful to be a part of something so visionary,” said Pappas, in Southern Utah to discuss workplace and housing equality with councilmembers in Moab. whose tenure has now ended. “We took a very difficult situaStephanie Pappas, outgoing president of Equality Utah’s board of directors, praised tion and turned it into something positive that created hope Balken’s leadership and said that the relatively new director would take the organization in for many people.” an inspired new direction.

The Common Ground Initiative was a package of four bills “I am excited to see what Equality Utah can accomplish now that Brandie is really getting co-written by Equality Utah and sponsored by gay or gayher stride,” she said.

Balken also commended residents in cities from Moab to Logan who often took the initia-

Honorable Mention: Stephanie Pappas

Photos: David Daniels

A joke by Jim Dabakis to a Salt Lake Tribune reporter appointed RadioActive producer, playwright and activist Troy Williams “the gay mayor of Salt Lake City” in early October, much to Williams’ chagrin.

“When did I run for office?” asked Williams, who writes the QSaltLake column “Queer Gnosis.”

While Williams takes a rather lighthearted view of his unofficial title, the brand of activism in which he is often involved can reach equally absurd levels. As the general legislative session wound to a close in March, Williams and several other activists lead several Utahns — including members of the press — down a political theater rabbit hole reminiscent of Sacha Baron Cohen’s Borat and Jonathan Swift’s A Modest Proposal. Under the banner of “Patriots for a Moral Utah,” Williams and several friends, including actress Tamara Johnson-Howell, staged a press conference to draw attention to a bill that sought a Nazi-like solution to the “problem” of gays in the state: forcible relocation or internment in a reparative therapy camp. Johnson-Howell played Nora Young, the group’s president who spouted lines taken from a number of anti-gay panegyrics from the extreme right. Williams described this character, who resembled the bête noir of the beloved drag character Sister Dottie S. Dixon, as “a composite of

Activist Eric Ethington’s blog PRIDE in Utah has quickly become a hub not just for information on rallies and protests around the state, but an up-to-the-minute source for information on social justice issues from the latest developments in the Proposition 8 case to anti-gay discrimination in international sports. But Ethington isn’t content to confine his activism to information-gathering. After LDS Apostle Boyd K. Packer told attendees at the church’s Fall General Conference that homosexuality was “impure” and could be changed, Ethington organized a large-scale protest around Temple Square. The rally, which drew thousands, made national news and lead CNN to name Ethington as one of its most “intriguing people” for the week of Oct. 4. Not one to rest on his laurels, Ethington and several friends surprised Utah’s leading gubernatorial candidates during a debate by loudly calling for Gov. Gary Herbert to support legal protections for lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people. The group responsible for that protest, Justice Vanguard, is the creation of Ethington and several other Utah activists, who formed it for the purpose of publicly and vocally confronting politicians on issues pertaining not only to gay and transgender rights, but immigrant rights, anti-racism and economic justice.

J a n u a r y 0 7, 2 0 1 1 | i s s u e 1 7 1 | Q S a l t L a k e | 2 1

Business Cards Starting at Just $10 Haven’t you been making excuses for having no business cards long enough? Or worse - cards printed on your printer that make you look less professional.

Business cards are your first impression.

Make it the best.

in SugarHouse 1055 E 2100 S Ste 206

801-649-6663 ext 113 EMAIL FILES TO INFO@SALTLICKPRINTING.COM

PERSON OF THE YE AR

Have you been putting off seeing a Chiropractor?

• Headaches • Back or neck pain • Arm or leg pain (sciatica) • Effects of scoliosis

• Carpel tunnel • Sports or recreational injury • Auto & work related injuries

Bach CHIROPRACTIC &

Make a Seamless First Impression

MASSAGE THERAPY

Kevin Berkley, Syracuse High School

Fidel “Pablow” Deleon, Bonneville High School

Honorable Mention: Turner Bitton A month before a wave of suicides brought about by anti-gay bullying rocked the country, Utah’s lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender community was shaken by the suicides of three young gay men. To memorialize them and to call for an end to anti-gay bigotry and violence, a teenager named Turner Bitton called for the community to join him on Capitol Hill for a Rally for Equality. There, speakers as diverse as PFLAG parents and QSaltLake editor and publisher Michael Aaron discussed the need for community cohesiveness and gay-straight alliances in high schools. At the same time, Bitton was also working diligently not only to help students in Northern Utah create such clubs, but to start a PFLAG chapter in Logan. Although the chapter did not get off the ground, Bitton’s tireless and outstanding efforts in helping the youngest and most vulnerable members of our community empower themselves made him an up-and-coming leader to watch.

Honorable Mention: Utah High School GSA Organizers Other up-and-coming leaders include a number of Utah students who are still in high school, and some who have just entered their freshman or sophomore year. Utah has come a long way since 1996, when the Salt Lake School Board banned all non-curricular school clubs in the district to prevent West High School from forming a gay-straight alliance. Today, GSAs are flourishing in Utah — and largely in rural areas — thanks to the efforts of students of all sexual orientations and gender identities. These brave, compassionate and thoughtful teens include:

Matt Halverson, Weber High School

Haylee McCracken, Fremont High School

Mario Ramirez, Bonneville High School

2 2 | Q S a l t L a k e | i s s u e 1 7 1 | J a n u a r y 0 7, 2 0 1 1

Logan Hunt, Dixie High School

Most insurance, Personal Injury & Workers Compensation, Flex & HSA plans accepted.

1473 S 600 E • SLC, UT (801)487-1010 • BACHCHIROPRACTIC.COM

Help us keep bringing you Utah’s Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender News and Entertainment.

Tell your advertisers THANK YOU for supporting us.

We’re moving in 2011

New address: 1548 E 4500 S, Suite 202 Salt Lake City, Utah 84117

Your one-stop shop for all your dogs needs Best of SLC ‘08, ’09 & ‘10 Dog Trainer of the Year

1458 S Main St, SLC www.dogsrusslc.com

ScienceDaily reported Sept 22, 2008 that people who had Botox treatments made a better first impression for attractiveness and dating and athletic success.

Entrust your skin to a board-certified dermatologist, Dr. Douglas M. Woseth, Fellow of the American Academy of Dermatology

801.485.7387

Douglas M. Woseth, MD, FAAD

General, Surgical and Cosmetic Dermatology

3920 South 1100 East, Suite 310 Salt Lake City, Utah 84124

801-266-8841

www.dwoseth.com

Ski & Swim

2011

Jason Osmanski, Snow Canyon High School

Feb. 11 – Opening Social Feb. 19 – Swim Meet Water Polo Hosted Dinner Parties Elevation Utah Party Feb. 20 – Park City Mountain Skiing Closing Social

Stetson Sheffield, Clearfield High School

Sala Tumanvao, Desert Hills High Schools J a n u a r y 0 7, 2 0 1 1 | i s s u e 1 7 1 | Q S a l t L a k e | 2 3

Register online at www.ski-n-swim.org

FOOD&DRINK

dining guide

restaurant review Tiburon: a Salt Lake Valley classic

Frida Bistro Sophisticated Mexican cuisine, wine and spirits 545 W. 700 South 801-983-6692 Loco Lizard Cantina Serious mexican food since 1999 at Kimball Junction.

1612 Ute Blvd., Park City 435-645-7000

By Chef Drew Ellsworth

I

recently dined at Tiburon, which has love the idea of serving a flavored butter and I been one of my favorite dining places in have copied the ones at Tiburon several times in Salt Lake for many years. When I was living my own cooking. in California and came to Utah for a visit, my My first nibble was a beautifully prepared sister took me to Tiburon many times, and it has seared scallop served on a glass plate with a been on my list of favorite eateries ever since. creamy tomato sauce, aioli and a streak of reKen Rose is the owner/manager and has duced balsamic vinegar — tasty and gorgeous! operated Tiburon for over 11 years. Ken comes to Next came a beautiful and tangy salad of Utah from the L.A. area where he worked as the mixed greens, green apple slices in a light vinaimanager of the Round Robin test kitchens, which grette. I don’t always have a salad when I go out was obviously a great schooling place for him. because eating one makes me too full and then Ken is very low key and down-to-earth; with him, I don’t enjoy my entrée, but this salad was just what you see is what you get, and that goes for the right size! It was topped with candied pecans his food, too. He runs a tight ship and rewards and a creamy Asiago cheese, and I ate every bite. his long-term staff by letting them use all of their Another plate came with a perfectly cooked pork talents. You get the feeling at Tiburon that every belly, served with a wedge of St. Andre cheese employee, down to the servers and busboys and caramelized onions. could take over any position at a moment’s After the appetizers and before my main notice. course, they served me a palate-cleansing sorbet By the way, Ken was also the original owner of of lemon-lime and pineapple. These tiny balls of Epic, which he has recently sold, and currently is ice were tart and luscious, made only with the operating a new place in South Jordan, the Wild freshest juices and absolutely no added sugar.

Rose.

Then the main course arrived: scrumpWhen I went to Tiburon last summer, I was tiously cooked medallions of lamb laced with very happy to see all the home-grown veggies two sauces, a savory demi-glaze and a crushed from a garden planted in back. One of Ken’s aspeppercorn sauce. The plate was beautifully consistants, a fellow named Taylor, is structed on mounds of spaghetti the gardener, and the Tiburon staff squash and mushroom risotto with Tiburon follows the lead of Bell Organic large disks of red beet and carrot 8256 S 700 East, Sandy Farms. Bell Organic only provides propping up a bouquet of green 801- 255-1200 produce to Tiburon, but they beans. As you can see from my tiburonfinedining.com helped in creating this garden. I photos, the plating at Tiburon is Sun–Thurs 5–9:30pm loved the many heirloom tomaFri–Sat 5–10:30pm spectacular. toes brought to our table.

CHEF DREW’S SCORE: For dessert I had a chocolate 91 My meal started with some delimousse served in a coffee mug cious, crusty French bread and a and topped with fresh raspberries glob of Tiburon’s famous flavored and kiwi. The flavor was wonderbutter. This time the butter contained roasted red ful, but I thought the mousse lacked the spongy peppers, fresh herbs and just a hint of honey. I texture I like to see and taste in a mousse. It was

Try our wild coconut, curried wild rice

Off Trax Café Coffee, wi-fi and pool 259 W 900 South 801‑364‑4307

801-486-0332

www.omarsrawtopia.com 2 4 | Q S a l t L a k e | i s s u e 1 7 1 | J a n u a r y 0 7, 2 0 1 1

4410 South 900 East

801.266.7899 Closed Sundays

Sage’s Cafe The freshest and healthiest cuisine possible 473 E 300 South 801‑322‑3790 Tin Angel Cafe Local food, music, art.

Serving lunch, dinner and Saturday brunch 365 W 400 South 801‑328-4155

Trolley Wing Company We’re Back! Open daily noon to 11pm 550 S 700 East 801-538-0745 Vertical Diner Vegetarian restaurant open seven days a week 10 a.m.–9 p.m.

2280 S West Temple 801‑484‑8378 To get listed in this section, please call 801‑649‑6663 and ask for Brad or e-mail brad@ qsaltlake.com

DIVERSIT Y IT’S ALL ABOUT

Food

•

People

•

Community

LIVE YOUR VALUES, EMBRACE YOUR POWER, AND SUPPORT YOUR LOCAL COMMUNITY When you shop at Cali’s, you care about the highest quality organics including produce, bulk foods, coffee, teas and much more. You also value fair pricing, freshness, your local community and most importantly, YOU!

A DIVISION OF DREW ELLSWORTH CULINARY CONCEPTS

Ecole DijonCooking School COOKING CLASSES

389 West 1700 South | Phone: 801-483-2254 OPEN Mon-Sat 10-7PM Sunday 10-5PM

SUNDAY NIGHT FOOD & WINE PAIRINGS

www.calisnaturalfoods.com

Learn about great wines and great food Wine taught by Wasatch Academy of Wine’s Sheral Schowe, and staff Food taught by Chef Drew Ellsworth, Certified Executive Chef Sunday, December 5

CHAMPAGNE & SPARKLING WINES WITH APPETIZERS AND DESSERTS Wine instruction by Sheral of Wasatch Academy of Wine more like chocolate flavored whipped cream or pudding than mousse. Nevertheless, it was also delicious.

Tiburon sells wine by the glass, but I found the wine list a bit pedestrian. In Utah today, restaurants don’t have to rely on old standby wines like Beringer or other common, large production California wines. There are so many affordable French and Spanish wines not to mention wines

• Locally owned and operated • 6 years serving delicious Thai food • LGBT friendly • Healthy thinking, fresh eating, dine-in take-out & catering

2148 Highland Drive

Omar’s Rawtopia Restaurant Organic live food 2148 S. Highland Dr. 801‑486‑0332

Mon–Sat, 11:30am – 3pm Mon–Thurs, 5–9pm Fri & Sat, 5–10pm

from all around the world that it’s a shame to not incorporate these available wines into any menu, especially at Tiburon where the cuisine is so deluxe.

Tiburon is located in Sandy at 8256 S. 700 East, and the quality of cuisine, service and the attention to detail are just about as good as it gets in Utah, so please go there soon. I rate Tiburon at 91 points. Q

• M is for California Muscat Truffle Center • Red Achiote Chile with White Honey-Truffle Center • Curry-Topped Port Wine Truffle Center • Spiral-Topped Pumpkin/ Grand Marnier Truffle Center

Small Gift Box with 4 Truffles one of each flavor $6.95

900 South 868 East

801.355.8899

Open Sunday Dinner

WE’RE BACK! MON– FREE POOL TUES– $5 WINGS WED– FREE SHUFFLE BOARD THURS– $6 PITCHERS OF BUD UPSTAIRS IN OLD TROLLEY SQUARE FACING 6TH SOUTH OPEN AT 12 NOON

801-538-0745 FACEBOOK.COM/ TROLLEYWINGCOMPANY

Large Gift Box with 12 Truffles three of each flavor $21.95

MONDAY NIGHT COMFORT FOODS & FRENCH PASTRIES

Learn how to make fresh bread and pastries in every class!

Monday, January 17

Martin Luther King Tribute Southern Cooking—Paula Dean Recipes

Classes are only $45 or 3 for $115.

Wine classes have a $15 wine fee.

Chef Drew will even hold classes at your home for as little as $40 per person.

See the Web site for details.

FOR MORE INFORMATION ON CLASSES CATERING AND CULINARY PARTIES: www.EcoleDijonCookingSchool.com chefdrewe@aol.com 801-278-1039

For people of all ages to hang out, play pool, get on the internet, play music COFFEE BURGERS SANDWICHES SOUPS SALADS APPETIZERS BREAKFAST BRUNCH POOL TABLE VIDEO GAMES JUKE BOX FREE WIFI OPEN Mon-Thur 7a–7p Friday 7a-3p AND After Bar Closing Fridays and Saturdays

259 W 900 S 801 364-4307

www.offtraxslc.com

Next to Club Try-Angles, Half Block from TRAX in the NEW Gayborhood!

Home of the Happy Hangover Sunday Brunch 11am–2pm Q PON

Free Soda or Coffee with food purchase

J a n u a r y 0 7, 2 0 1 1 | i s s u e 1 7 1 | Q S a l t L a k e | 2 5

ARTS&Entertainment

gay agenda

BearCity

save the date

See Jan. 10

Big gay fun

January 5–11 Utah Gay Ski Safari skioututah.com

by Tony Hobday

A few weeks ago I had mentioned that my friends decided that my birthday was being moved from New Year’s Eve to March 31 because it’s been much too difficult to plan and pull off a fabulous birthday on NYE. I don’t know if they felt bad about doing that or if they just really, really like me, but this NYE, my adorable group of friends threw me a pre-birthday bash at Try-Angles (from 5–7 pm), then guided me out the door to find a white stretch limo (and 10 bottles of champagne) waiting to take a bunch of us to see Jewel in Park City. Then there was a post-birthday bash at my friend Sparkle’s house. Then I ordered a pizza at 3:30 a.m. and passed out before it arrived ... oops! Birthday on NYE ... woohoo!

8

saturday — Local actors between the ages of 13 and 21 will be participating in the annual Student Slam, representing 17 different schools throughout Utah. Plan-B Theatre Company’s annual fund­ raiser encompasses the emerging talents of the young and the amazing talents of the veteran professionals in five 10-minute plays that are written, rehearsed and performed in a mere 24 hours.

8pm, Jeanne Wagner Theatre, Rose Wagner Center, 138 W. Broadway. Tickets $10, 801-355ARTS or arttix.org.

QQ I love taking the Big Gay Fun Bus to Wendover, I really do! Michael puts a lot of work into making it a memorable occasion ... however, I just hope that the batch of Jell-O shots he makes this time will not have the consistency of a rubber ball ... just sayin’.

Anyhoo, join us for a rowdy, sticky, glittery great time.

Noon–9pm, pick up at Club Try-Angles, 251 W. 900 South. Tickets $24, 1-800-838-3006, QSaltLake offices at 1055 E 2100 S Ste 206, or biggayfunbus.com.

10

monday — For those unfamiliar with the bear community, a number of scenes in BearCity will help enlighten about stereotypes and labels in a selfless, and often humorous, way. For those familiar with the bear community, I think you’ll enjoy the colorful characters — their gossipy, bitchy and, often, very sweet natures. It’s an adorable romantic comedy — check it out!

7pm, Tower Theatre, 876 E. 900 South. Tickets $6–8.50, 801-359-5158 or saltlakefilmsociety. org.

11

tuesday — Chris Carrabba, the boy-next-door singer/songwriter of the emotionally distraught Dashboard Confessional, brings the acoustic indie-emo rock band to town tonight. Teens of any sexual preference will connect with DC’s uninhibited songs of teenage love. If you’re over the age of 20, you may rather wish to schedule a waxing session. But then again, age and maturity are not exactly congruent in everyone. Chris Conley (Saves The Day) and Lady Danville will open.

7pm, In The Venue, 219 S. 600 West. Tickets $25/adv–28/day of show, 801-467-8499 or smithstix.com.

14

friday — Broadway in Utah presents a production of the multi-Tony award-winning musical Spring Awakening. It is a groundbreaking fusion of morality, sexuality and rock ‘n’ roll! Set in late-19th century Germany, it concerns teenagers who are discovering the inner and outer tumult of sexuality.

Contains mature themes such as sexual abuse, abortion and suicide; not suitable for children.

8pm, through Saturday, Kingsbury Hall, 1395 E, Presidents Cir., UofU. Tickets $25–62, 801-5817100 or kingtix.com.

QQ If you’re not into musicals ... don’t lie betch!, then check out Pioneer Theatre Company’s production of Black Comedy.

The play is a farce set in a London flat during

2 6 | Q S a l t L a k e | i s s u e 1 7 1 | J a n u a r y 0 7, 2 0 1 1

January 8 QSaltLake Big Gay Fun Bus to Wendover biggayfunbus.com January 15 sWerve’s Black & White Gala, swerveutah.com

an electrical blackout, and is written to be staged under a reversed lighting scheme: that is, the play opens with a dinner party beginning on a darkened stage, then a few minutes into the show “a fuse blows,” the stage lights come up, and the characters are seen shambling around apparently invisible to one another. Ooo ... sounds kinda kinky!

7:30pm, through Jan. 29, Pioneer Theatre, 300 S. 1400 East, UofU. Tickets $24–42, 801-5816961 or pioneertheatre.org.

QQ Javier Fuentes-León’s first foreign feature film is a romantic ghost story of sorts.

Undertow (Contracorriente) takes place in Peru, where Miguel and his pregnant wife seem to be the pillars of respect in their small fishing village and in their church. But Miguel’s been harboring a secret — one that could destroy his life as he knows it. He’s been having an affair with the village outcast, Santiago — an openly gay painter.

Opens today, Broadway Centre Cinemas, 111 E. Broadway. Tickets $6–8.50, 801-746-0288 or saltlakefilmsociety.org.

15

saturday — Take two lost children and an evil witch, add a pinch of cleverness and combine with glorious music, and you have a recipe for magic. Utah Opera presents Hansel and Gretel, who narrowly escape being baked into gingerbread cookies. Sung in Taiwanese with English supertitles ... are you paying attention?

7:30pm, through Jan. 23, Capitol Theatre, 50 W. 200 South. Tickets $15–85, 801-355-ARTS or arttix.org.

QQ It’s being called sWerve’s party of the year ... and these gals know how to party.

The Black & White Gala is a semi-formal event, and will be offering food, beer, wine and entertainment. Plus, great prizes will be raffled off. The Mistress of Ceremonies is comedian Karen Bayard, and musical guests

are Talia Keys, Mary Tebbs and Leraine Horstmanshoff.

7pm–midnight, 15th Street Gallery, 1500 E. 1519 South. Tickets $20/adv–25/at the door, swerveutah.com.

16

sunday — Join Equality Utah today for Jazz Brunch — full of mingling, mimosas, merriment and music by The Joe Muscolino Band.

Following the brunch guest are invited to the world premier of This is Now, a short play by local playwright Matthew Ivan Bennett — he’s awesome and sexy!

11am–2pm, Squatters loft, 147 W. Broadway.

Tickets $40, R.S.V.P. by Jan. 10 to 801-355-3479 or equalityutah.org.

QQ The Utah Human Rights Campaign is celebrating women, and why not, life as we know it would forever change without them. I mean who the hell would we get to help us gay men flirt with straight men and pick up hot onenight stands? Anyhoo, butch, femme, trans, lesbian, drag, straight, bisexual, ally ... come as you are to Her HRC Utah for an evening celebrating the diversity of women.

7pm, Club Jam, 751 N. 300 West. Door cover $10, visit utah.hrc.org for more info.

19

wednesday — The Grand Theatre presents a production of The Glass Menagerie (which is one of my favorites). It’s a true classic from one of America’s most prolific playwrights in which the truth is presented in the pleasant disguise of an illusion. A story that deals with failure, family, fathers, broken promises and tough decisions people must make.

7:30pm, Grand Theatre, Salt Lake Community College, 1575 S. State St. Tickets $10–24, 801236-7555 or the-grand.org.

UPCOMING EVENTS FEB 01 Plain White T’s, In The Venue FEB 14 Sarah McLachlan, Kingsbury Hall APR 16 Lily Tomlin, Kingsbury Hall APR 20 David Sedaris, Kingsbury Hall

January 16 Her HRC Utah utah.hrc.org January 20–30 Sundance Film Festival, Park City sundance.org February 18–20 QUAC Ski-N-Swim quacquac.org March 19 sWerve’s St. Patty’s Day Party swerveutah.com April Queer Prom utahpridecenter. org April 15 Day of Silence dayofsilence.org May Hey Look Us Over by the Salt Lake Men’s Choir, saltlakemenschoir. org June 3–5 Utah Pride Festival utahpridecenter. org

What’s gay at the 2011 Sundance and Slamdance Film Festivals (updated)

To help you prepare your choice of films to see at this year’s Sundance & Slamdance Film Festivals, Jan. 20–30, we have provided a list of gay‑themed films, as well as films featuring out cast and crew members, and a few recommendations from arts editor Tony Hobday ... those he thinks the actors are hot/talented and films he found intriguing.

Sundance PREMIERES Cedar Rapids / USA (Director: Miguel Arteta; Screenwriter: Phil Johnston) — Miguel Arteta returns to the Sundance Film Festival with a comedy about a group of insurance salesmen who use the opportunity to attend an annual convention in Cedar Rapids, Iowa, as a way to escape their doleful existence ... like Vegas but with corn.

Tim Lippe has been living in a small town his whole life and gets a rude awakening when he arrives in the “giant” metropolis of Cedar Rapids. However, his boyish charm and innocence eventually win over his fellow conventioneers, but he becomes disheartened when he uncovers corporate corruption. When it seems his life — and chances to succeed — are completely topsyturvy, he finds his own unjaded way to turn things around.

Cedar Rapids deftly straddles that line between laughing at and with its subjects thanks to Arteta’s skilled direction and Ed Helms’s hilarious, yet thoughtful, performance. John C. Reilly, Anne Heche, and Isiah Whitlock Jr. play off Helms perfectly to fashion characters that are eccentric, yet honest.

Filled with quotable dialogue and unforgettable scenes, Cedar Rapids achieves the impossible: it makes insurance fun. Cast: Ed Helms, John C Reilly, Anne Heche, Isiah Whitlock Jr, Alia Shawkat, Sigourney Weaver.

9:45 PM 9:15 AM 6:30 PM

Sun, Jan 23 Mon, Jan 24 Sat, Jan 29

Eccles Theatre Eccles Theatre Rose Wagner

June 23–26 Utah Arts Festival uaf.org August 4–7 Park City Arts Festival kimballartcenter. org August 20 Equality Utah Allies Dinner equalityutah.org

Circumstance / USA, Iran (Director and screenwriter: Maryam Keshavarz) — Teenagers Atafeh, and her best friend, Shireen, are experimenting with their burgeoning sexuality amidst the subculture of Tehran’s underground art scene when Atafeh’s brother, Mehran, returns home from drug rehab as the prodigal son.

Battling his demons, Mehran vehemently

renounces his former life as a classical musician and joins the morality police. He disapproves of his sister’s developing intimate relationship with Shireen and becomes obsessed with saving Shireen from Atafeh’s influence. Suddenly, the two siblings, who were close confidants, are entangled in a triangle of suspense, surveillance, and betrayal as the once-liberal haven of the family home becomes a place of danger for the beautiful Atafeh.

Splendidly constructed and saturated with a sumptuous sense of style and sensuality, Circumstance marks the arrival of an exciting, original talent. First-time feature writer/director Maryam Keshavarz registers a rare glimpse of forbidden love in today’s Iranian youth culture. Cast: Nikohl Boosheri, Sarah Kazemy, Reza Sixo Safai, Soheil Parsa, Nasrin Pakkho.

11:30 AM 9:00 PM 11:30 PM 12:15 PM 12:00 PM 11:30 AM

Sat, Jan 22 Tue, Jan 25 Wed, Jan 26 Thu, Jan 27 Fri, Jan 28 Sat, Jan 29

Library Center Theatre Tower Theatre Prospector Square Eccles Theatre Sundance Resort Prospector Square

The Details / USA (Director and screenwriter: Jacob Aaron Estes) — It all started with the raccoons.

After 10 years of marriage, Jeff and Nealy have a young son, an idyllic suburban life, and a marriage that’s stuck. Accordingly, Jeff decides to plant a perfect backyard lawn.

Enter the raccoons, who repeatedly tear up his grass. When Jeff tries to eradicate these meddlesome vandals, his efforts initiate a bewildering chain reaction involving a crazy cat lady, multiple infidelities, extortion, organ donation, and somebody on the wrong end of a bow and arrow.

Devilish throughout, The Details is both a love story and a horror story (of the existential kind). The root of Jeff’s dread (and subsequent misdeeds) is that he wants to love his wife but no longer knows how.

Filmmaker Jacob Aaron Estes plays with the notion that the tiniest thing can unravel our lives. His narrative spontaneity and anarchic spirit allow characters to keep digging themselves into deeper moral holes to see if the universe will punish them. The result is a

darkly funny meditation on marital malaise.

Cast: Tobey Maguire, Elizabeth Banks, Laura Linney, Ray Liotta, Dennis Haysbert.

6:15 PM 9:15 AM 9:00 PM 6:30 PM

Mon, Jan 24 Tue, Jan 25 Sat, Jan 29 Sun, Jan 30

Eccles Theatre Eccles Theatre Sundance Rose Wagner

Gun Hill Road / USA (Director and screenwriter: Rashaad Ernesto Green) — After three years in prison, macho Enrique (Esai Morales) returns home to the Bronx and finds things changed. His wife, Angela (Judy Reyes), is distant, and his teenage son, Michael, has a newfound independence and identity that is beyond Enrique’s comprehension. Unable to accept his child for who he is now, Enrique clings to his masculine ideals while Angela attempts to hold the family together by fiercely protecting Michael. Still under the watchful eye of his parole officer, Enrique must become the father he needs to be or, once again, risk losing his family and freedom.

The heart of Gun Hill Road lies in two places: a father’s inability to escape the vicious cycle of his life, and the richly drawn character of Michael (newcomer Harmony Santana is unforgettable). Writer/director Rashaad Ernesto Green’s first feature film is a complex family drama, told with gentle humor, sensitivity, and a deep understanding of the environment that defines its inhabitants. Cast: Esai Morales, Judy Reyes, Harmony Santana, Vincent Laresca, Miriam Colon.

5:30 PM 12:15 PM 6:00 PM 2:30 PM 8:30 AM 12:00 PM

Mon, Jan 24 Tue, Jan 25 Wed, Jan 26 Thu, Jan 27 Fri, Jan 28 Sat, Jan 29

Library Center Theatre Eccles Theatre Sundance Resort Prospector Square Egyptian Theatre Broadway Centre VI

My Idiot Brother / USA (Director: Jesse Peretz; Screenwriters:

Evgenia Peretz and David Schisgall) — Despite looking for the good in every situation and the best in every person, Ned always seems to find himself holding the short end of the stick—being conned into selling pot to a uniformed cop, being dumped by his girlfriend, and worse yet, losing custody of his beloved dog, Willie Nelson. When he turns to family, he is passed from sister to sister while he gets back on his feet. Ned’s best intentions produce hilariously disastrous results, bringing the family to the cusp of chaos and ultimately the brink of clarity.

Director Jesse Peretz has a keen eye for idiosyncratic human foibles, especially those that make you laugh. My Idiot Brother rolls along with fine-tuned precision by enlisting the talents of Paul Rudd and a talented cast, who can make uncomfortable moments delightful by infusing characters with the perfect balance of humor and pathos. My Idiot Brother reminds us of something we know already: there is no such thing as a normal family. Cast: Paul Rudd, Elizabeth Banks, Zooey Deschanel, Emily Mortimer.

6:15 PM 9:00 AM 6:30 PM Ogden 6:00 PM

Sat, Jan 22 Sun, Jan 23 Mon, Jan 24

Eccles Theatre Eccles Theatre Peery’s Egyptian Theater,

Sat, Jan 29

Tower Theatre

Salvation Boulevard / USA (Director: George Ratliff; Screenwriters: Doug Max Stone and George Ratliff, based on the novel by Larry Beinhart) — Reverend Dan is a charismatic preacher who has captivated a city with his charm. Ex-deadhead and recovering hippie Carl is one of the loyal sheep in his flock. When an antique firearms accident does in an atheistic novelist and Dan’s controversial antagonist, Carl is called into service in the most unconventional way. The megachurch is cast into shadow, and a hellish storm begins brewing that could jeopardize its entire existence.

The road to hell — in this case, Salvation Boulevard — is paved with good intentions

—Continued on page 28

J a n u a r y 0 7, 2 0 1 1 | i s s u e 1 7 1 | Q S a l t L a k e | 2 7

SUNDANCE & SL AMDANCE

What’s Gay at the 2011 Sundance and Slamdance Film Festivals Continued from page 27 — gone hysterically wrong.

This material is perfectly suited for George Ratliff, who directed the awardwinning documentary Hell House and the 2007 Sundance Film Festival hit Joshua. Down to every detail, you feel you are in capable hands. In a situation ripe with possibilities, the gloriously talented cast push their performances to the limit, spiraling this film toward instant cult-comedy status. In Salvation Boulevard, Ratliff peels back the onion to take a satirical look at Christian fanaticism — one guilty pleasure at a time.

Cast: Pierce Brosnan, Jennifer Connelly, Ed Harris, Greg Kinnear, Marisa Tomei.

2:30 PM Mon, Jan 24 6:15 PM Wed, Jan 26 12:30 PM Sat, Jan 29

Library Center Theatre Eccles Theatre Rose Wagner

The Future / GER, USA (Director and screenwriter: Miranda July) — The Future begins one afternoon on a sofa. Sophie and Jason, a 30-something couple in Los Angeles, realize that in one month, their lives will change radically when they pick up a stray cat they’re adopting. Wanting to take advantage of their fleeting freedom, they quit their jobs, disconnect their Internet, and pursue new interests, all of which literally alter the course of time and space and test their faith in each other and themselves.

Miranda July’s work slips and slides whenever you try to pin it down. A truly original voice, she has an uncanny intuition for playful, figurative storytelling. The Future is narrated by a cat. One night Jason freezes time and talks with the moon. Sophie decides to settle with an older man in suburbia as if she were shopping for a potential future: trying it on to see if it fits. An exhilarating, funny, and wildly inventive second feature, The Future reflects a profound understanding of the existential fears that accompany relationships.

6:15 PM 8:30 AM 9:15 AM

Fri, Jan 21 Sat, Jan 22 Fri, Jan 28

Eccles Theatre Library Center Theatre Eccles Theatre

The Son of No One / USA (Director and screenwriter: Dito Montiel) — The Sundance Film Festival is thrilled to welcome back a familiar face to close out its 2011 program. Dito Montiel won the directing award for The Guide to Recognizing Your Saints in 2006. He returns with another gripping New York story.

The Son of No One is a police thriller about a young cop who is assigned to a precinct in the Queens neighborhood where he grew up. To provide for his wife and ailing daughter, he works hard to keep his life on track. But this life is threatened when a dark secret bubbles to the surface. An anonymous source reveals new information about the unsolved murder of two boys and a possible police cover-up, setting off a chain of events that rattles the neighborhood.

Despite its studio-caliber cast, The Son of No One remains fiercely independent, thanks to Montiel’s passion and ability. He works within the cop-drama genre but fleshes out his characters and their world with an authenticity that heightens the film’s impact. You’ll remember it long after the Festival is over. Cast: Channing Tatum, Al Pacino, Katie Holmes, Tracy Morgan, Ray Liotta, Juliette Binoche. CLOSING NIGHT FILM 6:15 PM 9:15 AM 9:30 PM

Fri, Jan 28 Sat, Jan 29 Sat, Jan 29

Eccles Theatre Eccles Theatre Rose Wagner

DOCUMENTARY PREMIERES

Becoming Chaz / USA (Directors: Fenton Bailey and Randy Barbato) — Chaz Bono was a male trapped in a female shell for as long as he can remember. Growing up as Sonny and Cher’s adorable golden-haired daughter in a body he felt wasn’t his own

2 8 | Q S a l t L a k e | i s s u e 1 7 1 | J a n u a r y 0 7, 2 0 1 1

was a crucible it took years to transcend.

Now, as he undertakes gender reassignment, he’s bravely decided to share the process on camera. Becoming Chaz invites us along on Chaz’s remarkable journey of transformation. As hormone shots give way to top surgery, down-toearth, unflappable Chaz beams with a sense of liberation and goes public with his story to put a face on a misunderstood issue. Meanwhile, his gregarious girlfriend grapples with the realities of suddenly living with a man, and it’s clear sex change isn’t solely a physical transition.

Intimate and nakedly honest, the film reveals the humanity and courage it takes for Chaz to ultimately embrace his true self. His moving struggle will reverberate profoundly for anyone to whom authenticity matters.

8:30 PM 3:00 PM 9:00 PM 9:00 PM

Sun, Jan 23 Mon, Jan 24 Tue, Jan 25 Sat, Jan 29

Prospector Square Broadway Centre VI Holiday Village IV Yarrow Hotel Theatre

The Interrupters / USA (Director: Steve James) — Living, breathing, modern-day heroes are inspiring hope on the scary streets of Chicago.

Meet the Interrupters — former gang members who disrupt violence in their neighborhoods as it happens. Acclaimed director Steve James (Hoop Dreams, Stevie) working with noted author Alex Kotlowitz, recounts the gripping stories of men and women who, with bravado, humility, and humor, strive to protect their communities from the brutality they once employed. With his signature intimate vérité, James follows these individuals over the course of a year as they attempt to intervene in disputes before they turn violent: two brothers who threaten to shoot each other, an angry teenage girl just home from prison, and a young man on a warpath of revenge.

Both a voyage into the stubborn persistence of bloodshed in our cities today and a beacon of light, James’s unforgettable documentary captures each Interrupter’s inspired work, transporting us on a powerful journey from crime to trust to redemption.

9:00 PM 9:00 PM 9:00 PM 9:45 PM

Fri, Jan 21 Sat, Jan 22 Fri, Jan 28 Sat, Jan 29

Temple Theatre Redstone Cinemas 8 Temple Theatre Broadway Centre V

Rebirth / USA (Director: Jim Whitaker) — How does the journey of grieving and recovery unfold for individuals and a nation?

Rebirth chronicles the lives of five people profoundly affected by the 9/11 attacks. As a decade passes, we witness the progress of a student whose mother perished, a widow of a first responder, a woman who survived above the impact zone, a man who oversees Ground Zero construction, and a firefighter who lost his closest friends. As they cope with the excruciating and evolving pain of loss, time helps them refashion the scaffolding of their lives.

Meanwhile, amazingly, 14 time-lapse cameras chart the entire multiyear rebuilding of 7 World Trade Center — the first structure to rise to completion after the tragedy. The site’s renewal becomes a stunning metaphor for the cycle of life while the film’s characters reflect the resilience of humanity and the possibility of transformation in the face of anguish.

Inspiring a collective catharsis, this exquisitely moving documentary helps us process what is unimaginable.

8:30 AM 2:30 PM 9:30 PM 12:00 PM 3:00 PM

Fri, Jan 21 Tue, Jan 25 Wed, Jan 26 Thu, Jan 27 Sat, Jan 29

Prospector Square Library Center Theatre Rose Wagner Temple Theatre Holiday Village IV

U.S. DRAMATIC COMPETITION The Ledge (Director and screenwriter: Matthew Chapman) — Atop a high-rise building, Gavin, a young hotel manager, is about to end his life. Hollis, a detective whose own world has just been turned upside down, is dispatched to the scene. As Hollis tries to persuade Gavin not to jump, each man begins to open up about his past, and we discover that neither of them is convinced that his life is worth living.

In his Sundance Film Festival debut, director/screenwriter Matthew Chapman has crafted an intense thriller filled with soulful inspiration. While the film examines the complex notion of what drives us as people, strong performances and immersive characters keep the audience

Another Happy Day

(Director and screenwriter: Sam Levinson) — A wedding at her parents’ Annapolis estate hurls high-strung Lynn on the edge of their seats. The Ledge into the fire of primal, Byzantine family is a nuanced character study of love, dynamics. It’s the wedding of Lynn’s faith, and convictions that will leave son, whom she was deprived of raising you with a question ... How far are you because of her acrimonious divorce, willing to go for what you believe? Cast: and a feud still rages between Lynn and Charlie Hunnam, Liv Tyler, Patrick Wilson her ex-husband’s hot-tempered wife. and Terrence Howard with Christopher Meanwhile, the three children Lynn did Gorham. raise display a panoply of disturbing 3:15 PM Fri, Jan 21 Eccles Theatre behaviors like cutting and drug addic8:30 AM Sat, Jan 22 Prospector Square tion, which Lynn’s mother and sisters 3:30 PM Sun, Jan 23 Peery’s Egyptian Theater, Ogden alternately ridicule and blame her for.

6:30 PM Tue, Jan 25 Rose Wagner As Lynn attempts catharsis, her mother 5:30 PM Wed, Jan 26 Prospector Square sweeps issues under the rug, but painful 8:30 PM Fri, Jan 28 Library Center Theatre truths bubble and spurt. Clan members deploy ricocheting arrows to protect themselves — and wound others — as the fine lines between victims and perpetrators blur.

Many films have tread the terrain of upper-class family dysfunction, but few marshal as much sensitivity, rawness, and truth — and few performances penetrate as deeply as those of Ellen Pariah Barkin, Ellen Burstyn, and Ezra Miller as (Director and screenwriter: Dee Rees) — At the club, the music thumps, they navigate the emotional minefields go-go dancers twirl, shorties gyrate on of unmet needs that span generations. the dance floor while studs play it cool, Cast: Demi Moore, Kate Bosworth, Jeffrey DeMunn, Ellen Barkin, Ellen Burstyn, and adorably naive 17-year-old Alike takes in the scene with her jaw dropped Thomas Haden Church. in amazement. Meanwhile, her buddy 3:30 PM Sun, Jan 23 Eccles Theatre 6:30 PM Mon, Jan 24 Rose Wagner Laura, in between macking the ladies 8:45 PM Tue, Jan 25 Library Center Theatre and flexing her butch bravado, is trying 11:30 AM Thu, Jan 27 Prospector Square 8:30 AM Sat, Jan 29 Library Center Theatre to help Alike get her cherry popped.

This is Alike’s first world. Her second world is calling on her cell to remind her of her curfew. On the bus ride home to Brooklyn, Alike sheds her baseball cap and polo shirt, puts her earrings back in, and tries to look like the feminine, obedient girl her conservative family expects.

With a spectacular sense of atmosphere and authenticity, Pariah takes us deep and strong into the world of an intelligent butch teenager trying to find her way into her own. Debut director Miss Representation Dee Rees leads a splendid cast and crafts a pitch-perfect portrait that stands (Director: Jennifer Siebel Newsom; unparalleled in American cinema. Cast: Screenwriters: Jennifer Siebel Newsom and Jessica Congdon) — Like drawing Adepero Oduye, Pernell Walker, Kim Wayans, Charles Parnell, Aasha Davis. back a curtain to let bright light stream 9:30 PM Thu, Jan 20 Eccles Theatre in, Miss Representation uncovers a 8:30 AM Fri, Jan 21 Library Center Theatre glaring reality we live with every day 12:00 PM Sat, Jan 22 Sundance Resort but fail to see. It’s clear the mainstream 12:30 PM Sun, Jan 23 Rose Wagner media objectifies women, but what most 12:00 PM Wed, Jan 26 Holiday Village IV 12:15 PM Fri, Jan 28 Eccles Theatre people don’t realize is the magnitude of that phenomenon and the way objectification gets internalized — a symbolic annihilation of self-worth — and impedes girls and women from realizing their full potential. While women have made strides in leadership over the past few decades, trivializing and damaging images continue to proliferate. In a society

U.S. DOCUMENTARY COMPETITION

where media is the most persuasive force shaping cultural norms, the collective message that a woman’s value and power lie only in her youth, beauty, and sexuality is pervasive.

Stories from teenage girls and provocative interviews with politicians, journalists, academics, and activists like Condoleeza Rice, Nancy Pelosi, Katie Couric, Rachel Maddow, and Gloria Steinem build momentum as the film accumulates startling facts and statistics that leave the audience shaken and armed with a new perspective.

12:00 PM 9:00 AM 3:45 PM 12:00 PM 2:30 PM

Sat, Jan 22 Tue, Jan 25 Wed, Jan 26 Thu, Jan 27 Sat, Jan 29

Yarrow Hotel Theatre Temple Theatre Broadway Centre V Holiday Village IV Prospector Square

San Francisco to find acceptance. They formed a thriving, tight-knit community until the arrival of AIDS in the early 1980s drove them under siege.

Director David Weissman (The Cockettes screened at the 2002 Sundance Film Festival) chronicles this transformative era through the stories of five individuals who lived through the best and the worst of it. In the face of unheralded tragedy, these men and women relate how they were affected and the way their community united to help those suffering and prevent further deaths.

Elegiac but inspirational, We Were Here bears witness to the experiences of those who died — and, equally importantly, those who lived — in the earliest years of the AIDS epidemic. Its story is universal, showing the capacity for compassion and strength in all of us, even against unimaginable adversity.

12:00 PM 3:45 PM 9:00 PM 3:00 PM 8:30 AM

Troubadours (Director: Morgan Neville) — Framed by the illustrious careers of James Taylor and Carole King, Troubadours delves into the quietly explosive singer-songwriter movement in Los Angeles during the early 1970s. From their home at impresario Doug Weston’s Troubadour club in West Hollywood, artists like Taylor, King, David Crosby, Jackson Browne, Joni Mitchell, and Kris Kristofferson (the list goes on) wrote and performed songs with intimately personal lyrics, marking a transition from the politically focused songs of the ’60s. While some rock critics denigrated the music, the spirit among the musicians was one of collaboration and inspiration, and these singer songwriters flourished.

Morgan Neville creates a riveting chronicle of the time, weaving together archival footage, rare performances, and interviews from a veritable who’s who, including Elton John, Steve Martin, and Bonnie Raitt. Troubadours takes us deeply into the scene (and its inevitable demise) and celebrates the pure, timeless music and the undeniable legacy of these groundbreaking singer songwriters.

2:30 PM 9:00 AM 9:30 PM 6:00 PM 12:00 PM 11:15 AM

Sat, Jan 22 Tue, Jan 25 Tue, Jan 25 Wed, Jan 26 Thu, Jan 27 Sat, Jan 29

Prospector Square Yarrow Hotel Theatre Rose Wagner Temple Theatre Sundance Resort Holiday Village III

We Were Here (Director: David Weissman) — In the early 1970s, in the shadow of the Stonewall Riots and the free-love movement, gay men and lesbians flocked to

Sat, Jan 22 Sun, Jan 23 Mon, Jan 24 Wed, Jan 26 Fri, Jan 28

Temple Theatre Broadway Centre V Temple Theatre Yarrow Hotel Theatre Holiday Village III

WORLD CINEMA DRAMATIC COMPETITION A Few Days of Respite (Quelque Jours de Repit)/Algeria, France (Director and screenwriter: Amor Hakkar) — After escaping Iran, where their relationship means a death sentence, Hassan and Mohsen make it all the way to France. While stopped over in a small town to await their train to Paris, Mohsen befriends the lonely, but warm, Yolande, who offers him employment, kindness and the possibility of a peaceful life.

Amor Hakkar directs and stars as the aging man torn between a security he has never known and his passionate connection to his younger lover. A minimalist film that nevertheless feels visually and emotionally full, without forced sentimentality or manufactured drama, A Few Days of Respite questions the nature of love and happiness and the sacrifices we may make to achieve either. In this film directed and written with precision and economy, Hakkar allows us to know these characters in a single line of dialogue, and feel their conflict within the power of a glance.

Cast: Marina Vlady, Samir Guesmi, Amor Hakkar. World Premiere 6:00 PM 10:30 PM 9:00 AM 11:30 AM 1:00 PM

Tue, Jan 25 Wed, Jan 26 Thu, Jan 27 Fri, Jan 28 Sat, Jan 29

Egyptian Theatre Broadway Centre IV Egyptian Theatre Prospector Square Holiday Village I

Ticket to Paradise (Boleto al Paraiso)/Cuba (Director: Gerardo Chijona Valdes; Screenwriters: Gerardo Chijona Valdes, Francisco Garcia Gonzalez and Maykel Rodriguez Ponjuan) — In 1993 Cuba, as a severe economic crisis rages, Eunice runs away from her small town and her sexually aggressive father. With nowhere to go, she joins up with a group of homeless teens hitchhiking to Havana.

Eunice feels an instant connection to charismatic ringleader Alejandro. But her damaged past and his preoccupation with his dead-end existence stand in the way. Desperate, with no opportunities to improve their lives, the two consider taking extreme measures to reach an unlikely paradise.

Gerardo Chijona Valdes returns to Sundance with a film of heartbreaking intensity and rattling sensuality, filled with striking performances from a talented young cast. With a genuine affection for its lost-souled protagonists and tapping into the raw frustration endured during this period of Cuban history, Ticket to Paradise captures the drive toward hope in the face of utter despair, even when it leads to an unsettling and twisted place. Cast: Miriel Cejas, Héctor Medina, Dunia Matos, Jorge Perugorria, Luis A. Garcia. International Premiere 9:00 PM 10:30 PM 3:00 PM 9:00 PM 9:30 AM

Sat, Jan 22 Sun, Jan 23 Tue, Jan 25 Thu, Jan 27 Sat, Jan 29

Egyptian Theatre Broadway Centre IV Holiday Village IV Egyptian Theatre Holiday Village II

WORLD DOCUMENTARY COMPETITION

Shut Up Little Man! An Audio Misadventure/Australia, U.S.A. (Director: Matthew Bate) — In 1987, Eddie and Mitch, two young punks from the Midwest, moved into a low-rent shithole of an apartment in the Lower Haight district of San Francisco. Through paper-thin walls, they were informally introduced to their middle-aged alcoholic neighbors, Raymond Huffman, a raging homophobe, and Peter Haskett, a flamboyant gay man. Night after night, the boys were treated to and terrorized by a seemingly endless stream of vodka-fueled altercations between the two unlikely roommates. Oftentimes

nonsensical and always vitriolic, the diatribes of Peter and Ray were an audio goldmine just begging to be recorded and passed around on the underground tape market. For 18 months, Eddie and Mitch hung a microphone from their kitchen window to chronicle the bizarre and violent relationship between their borderline-insane neighbors.

Not satisfied with simply documenting these outlandish events, director Matthew Bate has concocted a darkly comedic exploration into the blurred boundaries among privacy, art, and exploitation. World Premiere 6:00 PM 6:00 PM 11:59 PM 3:00 PM 7:00 PM

Sat, Jan 22 Mon, Jan 24 Tue, Jan 25 Thu, Jan 27 Fri, Jan 28

Holiday Village IV Broadway Centre VI Yarrow Hotel Theatre Yarrow Hotel Theatre Redstone Cinemas 7

SPOTLIGHT

ATTENBERG / Greece (Director and screenwriter: Athina Rachel Tsangari) — In a small, seaside, industrial town, 23-year-old Marina maintains an exceptionally close relationship with her architect father, who is dying of cancer. Her only sexual knowledge comes from her friend Bella, with whom she practices kissing, and she remains an observer of mankind, emulating Sir David Attenborough whose animal programs she enjoys. While preparing for her father’s imminent death, Marina discovers her own sexuality with a visiting engineer.

ATTENBERG embraces the abstract and theatrical in choreographed interludes and wild-animal pantomimes, but provides an essential emotional point of access in the profound father-daughter bond. An unconventional coming-ofage film, ATTENBERG is the story of a girl-woman who comes to terms with sex and death as natural parts of life.

Cast: Ariane Labed, Yorgos Lanthimos, Vangelis Mourikis, Evangelia Randou.

U.S. Premiere 9:00 AM 6:00 PM 4:30 PM 12:00 PM 9:00 PM 1:00 PM

Fri, Jan 21 Sat, Jan 22 Sun, Jan 23 Tue, Jan 25 Sat, Jan 29 Sun, Jan 30

Egyptian Theatre Redstone Cinemas 8 Broadway Centre IV Egyptian Theatre Redstone Cinemas 8 Holiday Village I

Kaboom / USA (Director and screenwriter: Gregg Araki) — A hyperstylized, pansexual trip, Kaboom is a live-action film born out of the graphic novel aesthetic. Thomas Dekker plays Smith, a film student lust-

J a n u a r y 0 7, 2 0 1 1 | i s s u e 1 7 1 | Q S a l t L a k e | 2 9

SUNDANCE & SL AMDANCE Continued from page 29

Home Theater Systems Televisions Home Electronics Consulting Distributed Audio Surround Sound Packages Conference Room A/V

801-645-1021

The 2011 QPages will be published in May 2011.

Call to get rates

801.649.6663

1 1 0 2 Y A G ’S

H A T S U E G A P W O YELL

3 0 | Q S a l t L a k e | i s s u e 1 7 1 | J a n u a r y 0 7, 2 0 1 1

ing after his dumb, hunky roommate (aptly named Thor), but after eating a drug-laced cookie, he hooks up with a hot chick, London (Juno Temple).

Meanwhile, a bizarre mystery brews involving his lesbian BFF’s obsessive, witchy girlfriend, weird guys in masks who chase him around campus, and a recurring dream about a dead girl.

Unrestrained and completely over the top, Kaboom picks up where Araki’s “Teenage Apocalypse Trilogy” of the 1990s left off. With his impeccable craft, rebellious spirit, and outrageous vision intact, Araki remains a true indie master.

Cast: Thomas Dekker, Haley Bennett, Chris Zylka, Roxane Mesquida, Juno Temple. U.S. Premiere 8:30 PM 11:59 PM 6:00 PM 9:30 PM

Fri, Jan 21 Sat, Jan 22 Mon, Jan 24 Sat, Jan 29

understated pathos. No matter how confusing his personal relationships get, he’ll always be Uncle Kent. Cast: Kent Osborne. World Premiere 11:30 AM 10:00 PM 6:45 PM 11:59 PM 5:30 PM 9:00 PM

Fri, Jan 21 Sat, Jan 22 Sun, Jan 23 Wed, Jan 26 Fri, Jan 28 Sat, Jan 29

Prospector Square Redstone Cinemas 7 Broadway Centre V Egyptian Theatre Library Center Theatre Tower Theatre

PARK CITY AT MIDNIGHT

has all the blood and guts of Corman’s lurid and fascinating career, with essential insights from contemporaries and students. Learn the roots of indie filmmaking, laced with boobs and violence!

Cast: Jack Nicholson, Ron Howard, Martin Scorsese, Robert De Niro, James Cameron, Roger Corman.

World Premiere 11:59 PM 11:59 PM 1:00 PM 11:59 PM 9:00 PM

Fri, Jan 21 Sat, Jan 22 Sun, Jan 23 Thu, Jan 27 Sat, Jan 29

Egyptian Theatre Tower Theatre Redstone Cinemas 7 Yarrow Hotel Theatre Holiday Village IV

Thu, Jan 20 Fri, Jan 21 Sat, Jan 22 Wed, Jan 26 Sat, Jan 29

Library Center Theatre Eccles Theatre Rose Wagner Library Center Theatre Broadway Centre VI

INTERNATIONAL NARRATIVE SHORTS

Prospector Square Yarrow Hotel Theatre Tower Theatre Holiday Village II

Meek’s Cutoff / USA (Director: Kelly Reichardt; Screenwriter: Jon Raymond) — Set in 1845 along the unforgiving Oregon Trail, Meek’s Cutoff follows three pioneer families who have entrusted a scout, Stephen Meek, with guiding their wagons across a supposed shortcut. Faced with dwindling water supplies, mounting uncertainty about Meek’s dependability, and growing disagreement over a captured Native American, the group begins to fray.

Reichardt’s breathtaking vision recasts the mythology of the western. Focusing on simple rhythms and daily tasks, she conveys the families’ routines (boiling water, reloading a musket, or replacing a wagon axle) with incredible detail and authenticity. The film’s unadorned aesthetic yields a morally complex drama and meditation on human nature.

Set during the emergence of Manifest Destiny, it also presents an oblique, cutting comment on America and its policies today. Cast: Michelle Williams, Paul Dano, Zoe Kaza, Bruce Greenwood, Shirley Henderson.

Fri, Jan 21 Sat, Jan 22 Sun, Jan 23 Sat, Jan 29 Sun, Jan 30

8:30 PM 9:00 AM 3:30 PM 11:30 PM 9:00 PM

U.S. NARRATIVE SHORTS

BLOKES / Chile

Codependent Lesbian Space Alien Seeks Same / USA

3:00 PM 8:30 PM 6:00 PM 11:59 PM 2:00 PM

that this ‘special’ child was sent to them for a purpose: to teach them how to love.

(Director and screenwriter: Madeleine Olnek) Spring — Three lesbian aliens are sent to Earth. Their mis(Director and Screenwriter: Hong Khaou) — A sion? To have their hearts broken by earthlings so young man meets a stranger for an experience their overactive emotions won’t destroy the ozone that will change his life forever. of their planet. As the fetching extraterrestrials 11:59 PM Sat, Jan 22 Holiday Village IV search for romance on the New York lesbian dating 2:30 PM Sun, Jan 23 Prospector Square scene, one finds love with Jane, an eager stationery 10:30 PM Thu, Jan 27 Broadway Centre IV 9:15 PM Fri, Jan 28 Holiday Village II store clerk who is oblivious to the fact that she’s 7:30 PM Sat, Jan 29 Broadway Centre IV dating an alien. The other two, discovering the neediness of earthling women, connect with each I’m Having a Difficult Time Killing My Parents other as they reflect on the beauty of a cheesecake (Director: Jeff Tomsic; Screenwriter: T.J. Miller and Jeff Tomsic) — Thirty-two, unemployed, and in a revolving dessert case.

Tightly scripted with lo-fi styling and campy derailed somewhere on the path to adulthood, DIY effects that would make Ed Wood envious, T.J. has boomeranged back home. There, his enCodependent mashes up the B-movie and Men in nui takes the form of increasingly real fantasies Black and turns it into a witty, wholly original com- about offing his parents and becoming man of edy. First-time feature writer/director Madeleine the house.

Olnek (her shorts Hold Up and Countertransference 11:59 PM Sat, Jan 22 Holiday Village IV screened at the Festival in 2006 and 2009, respec- 2:30 PM Sun, Jan 23 Prospector Square tively) embraces the intrinsic hilarity of lesbian life 10:30 PM Thu, Jan 27 Broadway Centre IV and DIY filmmaking to tell a story about love that 9:15 PM Fri, Jan 28 Holiday Village II transcends galaxies. Cast: Lisa Haas, Susan Ziegler, Jackie Monahan, Cynthia Kaplan, Dennis Davis, Alex Karpovsky, Rae C Wright. World Premiere 11:30 PM 3:00 PM 6:00 PM 11:59 PM

Mon, Jan 24 Tue, Jan 25 Thu, Jan 27 Sat, Jan 29

Library Center Theatre Redstone Cinemas 8 Tower Theatre Yarrow Hotel Theatre

Broadway Centre IV

Sat, Jan 22 Sun, Jan 23 Mon, Jan 24 Fri, Jan 28 Sat, Jan 29

Broadway Centre V Holiday Village IV Prospector Square Tower Theatre Yarrow Hotel Theatre

Slamdance DRAMA / Chile (Director: Matias Lira) — Three theater students, influenced by a charismatic professor and French theorist Antonin Artaud’s acting technique, begin to experiment with their own lives, searching for real emotions and situations to bring onto the stage.

Their obsession with becoming better actors leads them to their darkest sides, surpassing boundaries that neither they nor their teachers could ever imagine. World Premiere 5:30 PM 3:30 PM

Sun, Jan 23 Wed, Jan 26

Treasure Mountain Inn Treasure Mountain Inn

(Director: Trevor Anderson) — Trevor drops his camera from Edmonton’s High Level Bridge in memory of those who have jumped.

3:00 PM 5:30 PM 4:30 PM 9:00 AM 12:30 PM

Mon, Jan 24 Tue, Jan 25 Wed, Jan 26 Thu, Jan 27 Sat, Jan 29

Saturday

Jan 8

Noon–9pm

NARRATIVE

The High Level Bridge

Corman’s World: Exploits Of A Hollywood Rebel / USA

(Director: Joe Swanberg; Screenwriters: Joe Swanberg and Kent Osborne) — Forty-year-old Kent Osborne works out of his sunny Los Angeles home as a cartoonist for a children’s show. During his day, he takes bong hits and hangs out with his fluffy cat.

Kent hopes to hook up with Kate, a cute New York journalist he met online on Chatroulette, when she comes to stay for the weekend. Although their time together is sexually loaded — they take raunchy pictures and pick up a bicurious girl on Craigslist — things don’t go quite as Kent imagined.

Written by Swanberg and Osborne, the film captures Kent’s existence with comedic charm and

Sat, Jan 29

12:45 PM 3:00 PM 8:30 AM 6:00 PM 3:00 PM

DOCUMENTARY

Egyptian Theatre Prospector Square Tower Theatre Holiday Village IV Holiday Village III

Uncle Kent / U.S.A.

7:30 PM

(Director: Marialy Rivas) — 13-year-old Luchito fantasizes about Manuel, his 16-year-old neighbor, whom he can see standing by a window in an adjacent project building. Oblivious of the gaze of his precocious voyeur, Manuel discovers his own sexuality with a girl from the neighborhood.

THE MOST RAUCOUS CHARITY/FUN BUS TO WEST WENDOVER

Y B RU GE D I R

EM THE AYH M AND F SO RON T A M

Holiday Village IV Prospector Square Broadway Centre IV Yarrow Hotel Holiday Village II

(Director: Alex Stapleton) — Independent film maverick. Trailblazing writer/director who takes chances with style and script. Inspirational humanist. Box-office success. Indie filmmaker from the 1970s or 1990s? No — Roger Corman!

While known for working fast — some of his films were made in two days — and wallowing in the B-movie world of monsters, bad special effects, schlocky acting, and plentiful nudity, Corman is also a respected rebel of cinema. He dealt with hot-button social topics like race and feminism. He created his own production and distribution com- The Terrys pany, tagging it “America’s Biggest Independent.” (Directors and Screenwriters: Tim Heidecke And he taught the next generation of film greats, and Eric Wareheim) — Two down and out losers including Scorsese, Demme, even Ron Howard. named Terry conceive a child in a fit of drugFrom Corman’s first 1955 feature to the set of his induced passion. The child is an abomination, new film, Dinoshark, this entertaining documentary

or so they think, but what they come to learn is

SUPERHEROES / USA (Director: Michael Barnett) — They patrol the dark and dangerous streets, seeking out criminals, evildoers and villains, veiled in secret identities. ...

They call themselves Real-Life Superheroes, and they are out to save humanity. Superheroes is a journey inside the world of real-life caped crusaders. From all over America, these everyday citizens don masks, homemade costumes and elaborate utility belts in an attempt to bring justice to evildoers everywhere. World Premiere 5:30 PM 8:30 PM

Fri, Jan 21 Wed, Jan 26

Treasure Mountain Inn Treasure Mountain Inn

Free buffet Tickets at: BIGGAYFUNBUS.COM, $5 cash back 1-800-838-3006, Club Try-Angles, or QSaltLake, 1055 E 2100 S Big Gay Bingo Prizes J a n u a r y 0 7, 2 0 1 1 | i s s u e 1 7 1 | Q S a l t L a k e | 3 1

FUN & GAMES

Q doku

Food&DRINK

Q doku

Level: Hard

cocktail chatter Drink, pay, love: rum and Coke

By Ed Sikov

N

Isle Say! Across 1 They poke around in leather 5 Shakespeare sprite 9 P-town beach sights 14 One of the Huxtables 15 Auth. unknown 16 Bucky Beaver’s toothpaste 17 Anthropologist Margaret 18 Aida backdrop 19 Barber belt 20 Start of a question 23 Military cross-dresser of Arc 24 Sharers’ word 25 Narrows down 28 Study groups 33 CK One emanation 34 Bitches 35 Moo ___ pork 36 End of the queston 40 U-turn from SSW 41 Network of Wedding Wars 42 Stallion’s supper 43 Alpha Chi Upsilon, for example 45 Type of fair 47 Von Trapp’s rank 48 Sow’s mate

Cryptogram

49 Answer to the question 55 Hot stuff 56 O.K. Corral gunfighter 57 Got a little behind 59 Composer Copland 60 Pay your share, with “up” 61 Don’t go straight 62 Quarterback Favre 63 Cowardly lion actor 64 Disturbance at a spa Down 1 It swallows plastic 2 “That was close!”

3 Starting Over bisexual 4 One who serves drinks with foamy heads 5 Bear-like creatures 6 It could be civil 7 Revolver inventor 8 Felt in your bones 9 Drag outfit, in Some Like It Hot 10 Rise, after a fall 11 ___ a soul 12 Hazzard County deputy 13 Suck the energy from 21 Mountain top 22 Sex appeal 25 Cherry Grove and Ogunquit

26 Hersey’s bell town 27 Gondola guy 28 Broadway musical pet 29 Art Deco design name 30 Lake Nasser dam 31 Gone with the Wind character 32 Like soap operas 34 Relief of Lincoln 37 Makeup for one of the Village People 38 Cole Porter’s “Katie Went to ___” 39 Checkers comment 44 Forest feline 45 Chris of American Beauty 46 Bonehead 48 Where to have a moving experience in bed?

49 “___ she blows!”

50 Put on the staff 51 Big top barker 52 Chloe’s role in Boys Don’t Cry 53 Blown away 54 Pine for 55 Where a trucker parks his bottom 58 In need of a lube Puzzle answers on page 39

A cryptogram is a puzzle where one letter in the puzzle is substituted with another. For example: ECOLVGNCYXW YCR EQYIIRZNBZN YZU PSZ! Has the solution: CRYPTOGRAMS

ARE CHALLENGING AND FUN! In the above example Es are all replaced by Cs. The puzzle is solved by recognizing letter patterns in words and successively substituting letters until the solution is reached.

This week’s hint: D = F, Theme: Quote by R. Clarke Cooper, executive director of LCR, about how his group expects to work with Republicans who aren’t necessarily in favor of LGBT equality.

P’a txq jxxlptm dxf r ovm owfw.

_ ’_

___

___

_

_______

___

____.

3 2 | Q S a l t L a k e | i s s u e 1 7 1 | J a n u a r y 0 7, 2 0 1 1

ews of my breakdown spread like an aging star’s belly; soon unflattering photos of me in Star would be on the horizon. I knew I’d become a public whack-job when some naked guy I didn’t know approached me in the gym locker room: “Hey, man — I’ve been through it. The guy who stole my dreamboy wasn’t obese, he just stank like a train station tearoom. But it turned Jeremy on. I didn’t. Solidarnosc, bud!”

Then he strolled off to the steam room.

Who was this guy? Had somebody put my crackup on Reuters? I leapt back into therapy. Gary was always sympathetic — I’d seen him when my mother was dying — but he was no cheerleader. When he thought I was nutty he told me so, once even using that exact word.

“So tell me,” Gary said as he leaned back in his chair. And I did. Gary’s face remained placid.

“Does this remind you of anything?”

“Yup,” I replied. “My dick, my mother and my bank account.”

“What does the money represent to you?”

Gary asked earnestly.

“It ‘represents’ another transfer of wealth from me to you,” I snarled. “Help me get over this _now_ or I walk.”

Gary looked stunned for a moment, regained his composure and softly said, “That’s such a cruddy thing to say that I think you’re genuinely terrified.”

I burst into tears.

“Look,” Gary said. “We’ve all made fools of ourselves at one time or another. This is your time. Wallow in it. When you’re really sick of yourself, we’ll talk about why you’re acting this way.”

“Gary, please!I’m already sick of myself.”

“If you were, you’d stop being so nutty.”

“That word again!” I shouted. “Even you hate me.”

Silence ensued for seven minutes. Only when he said, “Time’s up,” did either of us move.

I thought constantly about my ... what? ... hysteria? One thing was certain: I was, in Dan’s immortal phrase, “an old-fashioned asshole.”

OK, I indulged in a hell-as-comedy routine — the Three Dog Night variation, “I’m just an oldfashioned asshole/one I’m sure that frightens you and me;” but twice a week, with great effort, I told Gary some of the secret shames I’d withheld from him earlier.

Five weeks later, with Gary’s help, I worked up the nerve to call Craig. I heard Kyle in the background cleaning up after dinner — probably rigatoni stuffed with lard and covered in a cream-based triple-fat-cheese sauce for Craig; a hard-boiled egg for Kyle — and once again Craig was forgiving.

“Sweetness,” he said, “We all know you’re a mess. You’ve been a mess for years. It’s not news. I’m Tubby the Whale, and you’re Olivia de Havilland in The Snake Pit. It’s who we are. Embrace it! You and Dan come over to my place in an hour. I’ll make some cocktails.”

“What?” I asked skeptically.

“Control freak,” Craig announced. Then he hung up on me.

I’m Tubby the Whale, and you’re Olivia de Havilland in The Snake Pit. It’s who we are.

Embrace it!

Level: Hard

Each Sudoku a unique solution which one can be logically blank puzzle spaces.has Every row must contain of reached each digit, as must withouteach guessing.

Enter digits 1 through 9 intoQdoku the blank spaces. Every column and each 3x3 square. is actually five row must contain one of each digit, as must each column and each 3x3 square. connected, puzzles.

Qdoku separate, is actually but five separate, butSudoku connected, Sudoku puzzles.

2 7 3 8 4 6 8 7 5 7 7 4 8 1 2 8 9 4 2 3 2 5 1 3 2 7 8 4 7 9 1 6 2 3 6 5 2 5 4 3 2 5 9 4 7 6 8 4 7 1 6 4 8 2 7 3 5 3 9 6 8 4 3 4 7

7 8 9 3 5 1 8 2 3 9 4 4 6 9 6 3 8 7 9 7 4 3 2 6 2 9 3 8 7 2 9 1 8 6 1 6 5 2 7 3 1 4 2 1 8 5 8 3 2 2 8 4 7 5 6 5 3 8 8 6 7 9 4

Cryptogram A Cryptogram is a puzzle where one letter in the puzzle is substituted with another.

For example: ECOLVGNCYXW YCR EQYIIRZNBZN YZU PSZ! Has the solution: CRYPTOGRAMS ARE CHALLENGING AND FUN! In the above example e’s are all replaced by c’s. The puzzle is solved by recognizing letter patterns in a word or words and successively substituting letters until the solution is reached. This week’s hint: D=I Theme: Gene’s saying

AUDOR GOPDB HVG PEDOR D’X YGPZ

_____ _____ ___ _ _ _ _ _ _ ’_ _ _ _ _

Rum and Coke Rum to taste — I like dark rum to go with the dark cola. Craig used some store brand; use what you like.

Coca-Cola (in a nod to Kyle, used Coke Zero; I suppressed an instinctive “yeccchhhh” and downed it with humility.)

Pour rum into a tall, ice-filled glass. Add Coke slowly and stir gently; don’t kill the fizz. Then stay up all night from the caffeine, get fat from the sugar, stop worrying and live for the moment. Q Ed Sikov is the author of Dark Victory: The Life of Bette Davis and other books about films and filmmakers.

J a n u a r y 0 7, 2 0 1 1 | i s s u e 1 7 1 | Q S a l t L a k e | 3 3

KRCL is home to public affairs programming that's focused on inclusion Ð not exclusion Ð and presenting alternative viewpoints. Tune in for RadioActive every week night, your chance to participate in the conversations that affect the LGBT and allied community. Be a part of KRCL.

Anagram An anagram is a word or phrase that can be made using the letters from another word or phrase. Rearrange the letters below to answer: Who’s turning five?

GAY BURNT CELLS ____ ___-______

EN español

español exprés

My naked truth, so naked

By Gus Herrera

P

robably many of us have had dreams about being naked. All right! Stop right there! I know what you all are thinking ... no, not in a sexual way; you know being naked in front of people. Examples? Let me begin with being naked in front of your friends, in front of your classmates and yes, even in front of your mom (not my case, wink, wink).

According to many psychoanalysts, one of them being Sigmund Freud, dreaming about being naked could reflect vulnerability or feelings of shamefulness. He also explained that it could mean that one is hiding something or is afraid that others can see right through him. So I just wonder what was I hiding when I had that dream with my mom ... I’m not going to go into any details.

But the topic of the column is not about dreams; and it’s not a psych column either (I wish, no not really), it’s about being naked in front of 70 people. Yes, I was invited two weeks ago to attend a naked party. A naked party? Seriously? Me naked? In front of people? I blushed. I said I’d think about it. I was pretty sure that there were no chances of me going to a party like that.

I mean, what if I saw someone hot and ... well you know we all are human (I’m not a pervert, I swear).

To my own surprise, I found myself knocking on the door of the party. The door opened and yes, tons of people were in their birthday suits. I freaked out. All I could think of was that I

shouldn’t have eaten so much during the holidays and I should have hired a personal trainer at the gym. I was there, and I was going to be in that party ... I could be anything but a wimp.

So I left my clothes aside and I walked into the big room; everyone was talking, laughing, eating and having fun. I didn’t know anyone there. In the corner people were talking about politics while drinking a glass of wine. I was shocked; I had a different idea of this nude party. I was greeted by someone and I felt more confident.

“What brings you here,” he asked.

I wanted to blame it on my editor, you know: “my editor wants me to do a story on this topic,” but I thought that would be too much. So, with a nervous smile I said that a really good friend invited me.

I couldn’t help but ask these people what are the motives to have this kind of party. Is there a sexual motive? What happens if you like someone in some sort of way and ... you know ... or what if it’s too cold?

All these questions were answered by one simple and honest answer that came from a young man.

“I come here because I don’t feel ashamed of my nakedness, people show who they really are without masks or lies.”

I didn’t say anything for a few seconds. Yes, it was true. I looked around and everyone seemed happy; people were looking at other people in the eyes. (Not somewhere else.) Hugs and kisses came and went, and all with no other intention than to socialize and be honest. So, finally, I forgot about those 30 minutes of cardio I skipped at the gym, I forgot if I was too fat or skinny to be naked. I enjoyed myself, made new friends, ate a lot (mostly veggies, LOL) but the most important thing is that I learned that I shouldn’t judge a book by its cover. In this case, I shouldn’t judge people just from the title of the party — “Happy Nude Year.” Q

Mi verdad al desnudo, demasiado desnudo por Gus Herrera

P

robablemente muchos de nosotros ha tenido sueños en el que nos encontramos desnudos. ¡Esta bien! ¡Paren allí! Ya se lo que todos están pensando ... no no en una forma sexual, ustedes saben estar desnudos en frente de muchas personas. ¿Ejemplos? Déjenme comenzar por: estar desnudos frente a sus amigos, de sus compañeros de clase, y si por que no hasta en frente de sus madres (no es mi caso por supuesto jaja).

De acuerdo con muchos sicoanalistas, siendo uno de ellos Sigmund Freud, el sonar estar desnudo puede reflejar vulnerabilidad o sentimientos de vergüenza. También explica que puedo significar que uno esta escondiendo algo o tiene temor de que los demás puedan ver mas allá. ¿Entonces, me pregunto

que estaría yo escondiendo cuando soñé estar desnudo frente mi mama? ... No voy a entrar en detalles.

Pero el tema de esta columna no es acerca de los sueños, y desde luego que tampoco es una columna psíquica (quisiera ... no no es cierto). Es acerca de estar desnudo frente a 70 personas. Si, fui invitado hace dos semanas a una fiesta nudista. ¿Fiesta nudista? ¿En serio? ¿Yo desnudo? ¿En frente de tantas personas? Me sonroje. Dije que lo iba a pensar. Estaba muy seguro de que no iría nunca a una fiesta así. Imagínense, que tal si veo a alguien que esta bueno ... ustedes saben ... todos somos humanos ( no soy un pervertido, lo juro).

Para mi sorpresa, me encontré tocando la puerta de la fiesta.

La puerta se abrió y si, muchos tipos en Pelotas. Me sentí nervioso. Todo lo que pude pensar fue en que no debí comer

Please friend us at FaceBook.com/QSaltLake 3 4 | Q S a l t L a k e | i s s u e 1 7 1 | J a n u a r y 0 7, 2 0 1 1

CLUB ID LID MILITARY A S V R E H B IT M W E S M R E O MB EE T IVILEGES -OFVRER FOR OUR SERVICEME R P S IT S A H IP NO C MEMBERSH TELL ’T N O D , K S A DON’T

22 N A J Y A D R U T SA

T H G I N R A E W R E D N U for a it ask On your next vis

d r a C y t l a y o r following visits. nglmepsed L Try-gA on you et it sta in and

tanto en las pasadas fiestas y que debí haber de contratado al instructor del gym para bajar esos kilitos ... En fin, estaba ahí, iba a estar en esa fiesta ... pueden llamarme cualquier cosa menos miedoso.

Deje mi ropa a un lado y camine con dirección a la sala , todos estaba hablando, riéndose, comiendo, y divirtiéndose.

Yo no conocía a nadie allí. En una esquina algunos invitados estaban hablando de política mientras tomaban una poca de vino. Estaba impresionado, mi idea era otra acerca de este tipo de fiestas. Alguien me saludo y me hizo sentir mejor. Que te trae por aquí me pregunto … quise culpar a mi editor, ustedes saben “mi editor quería que escribiera una historia acerca de este tipo de fiestas,” pero no pude, entonces dije que un buen amigo me invito.

No pude evitar el preguntar a estas personas cuales eran sus motivos para tener este tipo de encuentros. ¿Había acaso un motivo sexual? ¿Que pasa si te gusta alguien y ... Saben de que estoy hablando verdad? ¿Que tal si hace frío? ... jaja.

Todas estas preguntas fueron respondidas por una simple y honesta respuesta que vino de un tipo joven.” Cuando vengo a este tipo de reuniones no me siento intimidado de estar desnudo, las personas se muestras tal y cual son, sin caretas y sin mentiras” ... no pude decir nada por algunos segundos.

Si, era cierto, pues cuando mire a mi alrededor todos parecían felices, las personas se veían unas a otros a los ojos, nada mas parecía importar. Abrazos, besos iban y venia sin ninguna otra intención que la de socializar. Finalmente me olvide de los 30 minutos de cardio que olvide intencionalmente en el gimnasio, olvide si era demasiado gordo o delgado. Me sentí feliz, hice nuevos amigos, comí demasiado. Pero lo mas importante es que aprendí a no juzgar a un libro por su portada. En este caso a las personas por el titulo de la fiesta “naked party.” Q

and ps, turn it m a t s r u fo e v a h repeat. d When you n a d r a c w e n , p get a fresh, cris the better your odds u turn in, o y s d eb. 5 r a F c n e o r o g m in w a r The D affle to winning the R

Grand Prize:

bar, After the c ontinues the party at next door

s e s s a p i k s o Tw t a y a t s t h g i n e and a on yons Resort The Can iller Lite. rt by M a p in d e r o s n o p S

om • offtraxslc.c 259 w 900 s

n of o s a e s w e n e h t h Come watc

e c a R g a r D ’s londay, Jan. 24, 7pm u a P u R starting M

S $1 DRAFTS Y A D S E U T ▼ ES ACKROOM BLU FTS B & S IE N E E W S OY TOY, $1 DRA Y B A J D D N S O Y A M ID ▼ R AFTS ▼F AYS KARAOKE RAOKE • $1 DR A D K S R S U Y H A T D N ▼ U S NEY OPEN DAILY AT 2PM YS POOL TOUR A D S NIGHT E N L L D A E E W C N ▼ A -D 251 W 900 S ▼ 801-364-3203 E NCE-DANC A R D A B S E Y A TH T D U R O U 1/2 BLOCK FROM 9th S TRAX STATION UGH ▼ SAT SCREENS THRO ON SHY? TEXT HIM

OUR

WWW.CLUBTRY-ANGLES.COM

J a n u a r y 0 7, 2 0 1 1 | i s s u e 1 7 1 | Q S a l t L a k e | 3 5

o

LIBRA (September 23–October 22) As onerous as family or community duties may feel, you can accomplish a lot and gain great influence. You’re creative enough to find a positive approach. Once you start there will be no stopping you!

e

Free Cover r All Night

[

THE BEST LATINO GAY NIGHT WITH THE BEST MUSIC BY DJ FRANK THE HOTTEST GO- GO DANCERS SHOWS & ENTERTAINMENT AND THE BEST CROWD IN UTAH...

I

really need ... sex. Yes, I’ve been trying this celibacy bit for the last nine months, but I’m going to be the first to admit that SCORPIO (October 23–Nov 21) it sucks, and not in a good way. It sucks to ARIES (March 20–April 19) What you have to say is too important If you can focus (and there’s the to be wasted. Polish those gems the point where I can’t get the word ‘sex’ out of challenge!), you can achieve great and be careful to share them where they are my head. Literally. I turn everything into a sexual things. Meditation can help tame that unruly, appreciated. A little imaginative probing can innuendo, to the point where last week when dreamy mind and draw inspiration. Friends reveal family secrets or community scandals. a friend said his Christmas tree was dying and who want your time can be a distraction, or ‘sucks,’ I suggested he drill a hole in the bark SAGITTARIUS (Nov 22–Dec 20) you can enlist them to help! and take full advantage of it.

Discuss your financial worries with Yes, I’m that guy. I don’t feel cleansed. In fact, TAURUS (April 20–May 20) a trustworthy friend, or a parent or I feel dirtier than ever. And that’s not a good Ideas brewing in your head need sibling. You may stumble on solutions or just a release. Getting yourself heard realize that things aren’t as bad as you think. place to be when you have to go to work and be professional. So daily, I sit in front of a computer, could help or hurt you at work. Discussing Clear your head of worry to think clearly typing this-and-that while thinking about love in those notions with a friend first can help you about resources at hand. the key of getting on my knees. improve them and see best where and how CAPRICORN (Dec 21–January 19) To add insult to injury, I’m dating my exto air them.

Your sign improves most with age, partner, and it’s going really well, except I told GEMINI (May 21–June 20) but exercising the body and mind him I don’t want to have sex because I don’t Explore your fantasies and bring them are important for staying sharp. Advice from want to rush and complicate things. I want him into your real-life lovemaking. Well, at friends should be heard, but not necessarily to put up a fight. Yes, I really, really, really want least consider them carefully. Some of those followed. It could open your mind to even him to tease me because I’m pursuing him this dreams may need safety checks and adapta- better possibilities. time. Therefore, when he pulls away, I have to tions to be performed in the physical world. pretend I’m OK with it. I have to smile pretty for AQUARIUS (January 20–Feb 18) CANCER (June 21- July 22) Self-criticism can be very helpful if the camera even though I’m suffering from hot Your fancy notions could shock or you don’t take it to extremes. There’s flashes of anger, resulting in two bar fights in the titillate your partner. A discussion of always room for improvement, and an hon- last month. Yes, two weeks ago, I was literally carried out of a nightclub by the neck for telling limits may be in order. Even out of the sack, est assessment of your virtues and your your sweetheart can help you with reality flaws will make you clearer on what you have off some Jersey Shore asshole. And before that, I made a drag queen cry, telling him I was going to checks to help you figure out which of your to offer. rip his face off for calling my friend a whore. But dreams can come true.

PISCES (February 19–March 19) honestly, I’m usually a sweet guy. What’s wrong LEO (July 23–August 22) You have to be very careful not to with me?

Every relationship takes work. Take give too much of yourself. Have a “Your body is detoxing. You just need to up the tough issues now while it’s a long talk with a friend you can count on to be breeeeeaaaathe,” my friend Jon tells me. little easier. You might be surprised at what ruthlessly honest about your limits and how “But I’m horny!” I cry. “What am I going to do?” problems can be resolved in the bedroom. you should set them.

“Are you masturbating?”

That might not solve everything, but it will at Jack Fertig, a professional astrologer since 1977, “Um, yeah, readily.” least help! is available for personal and business consulta- “But are you doing it right?” tions in person in San Francisco, or online ev- “Is there a wrong way?”

VIRGO (August 23–September 22) Your intuition is especially clear now. erywhere. He can be reached at 415-864-8302, Apparently so. It seems I had been misled. Jon through his website at www.starjack.com, and bytells me that masturbating should be more like With some practice you can learn to use it to better purpose in any kind of e-mail at QScopes@qsaltlake.com. a cleansing of the soul and that I have to make it more of an ‘experience.’ I mean, burying my face in my boyfriend’s dirty briefs and jacking off ... that’s so primitive. According to Rob, I’m supposed to light tea candles, gather herbs, set the night to music, touch my dick (just a smidge) and then turn myself down.

An anagram is a word or phrase that can be made using the letters from another word or phrase.

“Huh?” “You know, tease yourself. Don’t give in.

Rearrange the letters below to answer: That’s your problem. You’re making it too easy.”

Name the frontman of the alt pop/rock band Plain White T’s.

“Wait. Let me get this right. I’m supposed to cock-block myself?”

“Exactly,” Jon says, becoming my confidante regarding the fine art of abstinence. And I find his stance a nice change, when most of my other ___ _________ friends feel I need to shut up and ‘fuck my way to happy.’ And oh, how they love to rub the wound, texting me about their awesome sex lives on PUZZLE SOLUTIONS ARE ON PAGE 39

p

Don’t Miss Out on this !!!

Over 300 People Every Sunday

By Anthony Paull

t

]

y

q

u

w

i

anagram

honing get som

3 6 | Q S a l t L a k e | i s s u e 1 7 1 | J a n u a r y 0 7, 2 0 1 1

a daily basis. Oh, I got nailed. Oh, he was so big. Oh, my butt hurts. Oh, I got it several times today. Who needs toilet paper when you have a penis to clean you out? Wink. Wink. Wink.

Thank god Jon is able to ground me, helping me understand there’s more to life than sex, that we’re spiritual beings having a human experience. Well, until the holidays hit.

“You’d be so proud of me. I haven’t spanked all week,” I inform him.

“God, I wish I had your willpower,” he replies.

“What? You gave in?”

“Yeah, I had a moment of weakness.” It appears, while home for New Year’s Eve, he found an intriguing Bear-4-Bear porn site and got naked at the stroke of midnight on his mom’s computer. Initially, he thought the entire affair would remain a secret, except his mom had spyware installed on the computer, which transmits all of the Internet data to her pastor, who serving as her marriage counselor, oversees all web activity because her boyfriend has a cyber porn problem. Hence now, the pastor thinks her boyfriend is gay, which might be the root of their problem altogether.

“My mom’s livid!” Jon exclaims.

“Why? Because her pastor has an issue with her boyfriend being queer? Big deal. Aren’t most pastors gay anyway?”

“No. That’s priests!” He snaps. And now, he’s back to college, and I’m back to the drawing board, getting a hard-on every time my boyfriend comes within five feet of me.

It’s pathetic, really. I can’t touch myself. I can’t touch him. Who am I supposed to touch?

“What’s the matter? You’re acting crazy,” my boyfriend exclaims, later that night when I freak out over the fact he’s not reciprocating my advances.

“I need passion!” I say, gathering my keys and heading out the door. “I can’t wait anymore. I don’t want us to become one of those sexless couples who beat off on the Internet.”

“Huh? Why would we become that?” he asks.

Meanwhile, I’m jogging down the driveway, rattling my keys. “Hold on,” he calls. “I don’t get it.

One minute you want sex. The next minute you don’t. What do you want?”

And breathless, I turn and stare at him silently, unsure of what to say. There are so many things I want, really. To feel safe, to feel beautiful, to feel loved; I’m placing all that on him because, as my boyfriend, he’s the one who’s supposed to provide me that. I don’t look for it from outside forces, and it’s hard to find it inside myself when I’m consumed with making him happy. So to answer his question, plain and simple, I tell him honestly that I want to stop thinking about having sex with him so I can focus on loving myself. Q

J a n u a r y 0 7, 2 0 1 1 | i s s u e 1 7 1 | Q S a l t L a k e | 3 7

MIKE BABBITT’S

DANCE PARTY spinning Top 40 remixes

NO COVER

Mars is very happy in Capricorn where the planet of energy and action is focused productively.

Aspecting Uranus and Jupiter in Pisces, and Neptune in Aquarius, he can lose focus, but if you can stay on track while examining your process you can find new purpose and methods to strengthen your efforts.

NO COVER

@

By Jack Fertig

teamwork, practical or romantic. Trust those hunches in healing any kind of relationship– or finding one.

NO COVER

Take up the tough issues, Leo!

the dating diet U and ur hand

SUNDAYS & WEDNESDAYS

SUPERSTAR KARAOKE Dollar drafts and $2 shots Free sushi while it lasts!

9pm

NO COVER

Q scopes

THURSDAYS

751 North 300 West Open Tues–Sun www.jamslc.com

UTAH’S BEST GAY CLUB 2 YEARS RUNNING!

Qtales

honor roll

the perils of petunia pap-smear

These businesses brought you this issue of QSaltLake. Make sure to thank them with your patronage.

A New Day Spa. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 801-272-3900

The tale of yellow snow

T

SUNDAYS KARAOKE $1 DRAFTS

TUESDAYS

POWERBALL KARAOKE 9PM-12AM COME EARLY FOR YOUR CHANCE TO WIN $3 CUERVO SILVER

WEDNESDAYS Dueling Pianos $3 BIG BUD LIGHT

9 6 4 3 2 1 7 8 5

2 1 5 7 8 9 6 4 3

2 4 5 3 6 9 7 8 1 7 8 3 5 6 4 9 1 2

5 2 1 9 3 7 6 4 8 5 9 2 4 3 8 1 6 7

9 6 4 8 1 5 2 3 7 1 7 6 9 5 2 8 3 4

3 8 7 2 4 6 9 1 5 3 4 8 6 1 7 5 2 9

8 5 1 2 9 3 4 7 6 1 9 2 8 5 3 7 9 4 1 2 6

4 3 9 8 7 6 2 5 1 4 8 3 7 9 6 1 8 2 4 5 3

6 2 7 1 4 5 3 9 8 5 7 6 4 1 2 6 5 3 8 7 9

6 1 4 7 2 9 5 3 8

8 2 7 6 3 5 9 4 1

9 3 5 8 1 4 6 2 7

2 8 7 9 1 6 5 4 3 2 6 7 1 8 9 2 6 4 5 7 3

9 6 1 5 4 3 7 8 2 9 5 1 3 6 4 9 5 7 2 1 8

3 4 5 7 2 8 1 6 9 3 4 8 2 7 5 1 8 3 9 4 6

6 3 2 4 1 5 8 9 7 5 2 8 3 6 9 4 7 1

4 1 7 8 9 6 3 5 2 7 9 4 2 8 1 3 5 6

5 9 8 3 7 2 4 6 1 1 3 6 4 7 5 9 2 8

8 2 6 5 4 1 7 3 9 4 5 9 6 3 2 8 1 7

9 5 1 7 3 8 6 2 4 8 7 2 1 9 4 6 3 5

7 4 3 6 2 9 1 8 5 6 1 3 8 5 7 2 9 4

801-519-8900 www.tavernacle.com

6 7 8 5 2 1 3 9 4

Dueling Pianos

Non-Smoking Corner of 3rd S and 2nd E

1 3 9 4 7 8 5 6 2

FRIDAYS

SATURDAYS

Cryptogram: I’m not looking for a hug here.

Anagram: Tom Higgenson

Dueling Pianos $3 VODKAS

Dueling Pianos $3 CAROLINA SWEET TEAS

driving, and Elaine, a Southern California native unused to snow holding onto my waist for dear life.

Due to a tragic failure of planning on my part, I totally underestimated the “God given” effects of the chili beans and hot chocolate.

Before long, as we relentlessly bounced up and down over the miles and miles of snow drifts, I could feel a massive build up of methane gas in my stomach, and my bladder was filling to explosive levels. Even though I knew that Elaine would not be able to hear me fart above the noise of the snowmobile, I was afraid to “let it fly” for fear of possible emissions containing more than just gas, and the oh-so-embarrassing trauma of “skid marks” on my underwear.

After a while, the laws of physics being what they are, the pressurized methane overpowered the strength of my sphincter, and with each bump, a small cloud of greenhouse gasses erupted inside my snowsuit. Before long, Elaine tapped me on the shoulder and begged me to stop. I guess that she also had held everything in as long as possible, but had reached the point of no return and had to pee. As a guy, who owns male plumbing, peeing in the woods is no big deal. We can even artfully write our names in the snow if we please. But as a woman wearing a onepiece snowsuit, Elaine practically had to get naked in subzero weather in order to do her business. Poor Elaine was so embarrassed as I watched her trudge off the trail through the waist-deep snow to find a tree for privacy. It was certainly a far cry from the beaches she

puzzle solutions

THURSDAYS

Affinity Wealth Solutions . . . . . . . . . . 801-403-5230 Bach Chiropractic . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 801-487-1010 The Beer Nut . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 801-531-8182

By Petunia Pap-Smear

he road to Hardware Ranch is fraught with danger and excitement.

The names in this story have been changed to protect the innocent.

Many eons ago, if my memory serves me, just at the beginning of the Paleolithic Era, my reparative therapist/torturer and my bishop encouraged me to set a new year’s resolution to go on at least one date a month “with a girl.” Yuck! But against my natural instincts, I played the part of the good little return missionary and asked my home-evening sister, Elaine, to go snowmobiling on New Year’s Day. I figured this was a totally safe date that wouldn’t really compromise my standards, and would even still be fun.

I should have seen the signs that all would not go well right at the beginning of the day, when instead of a stylish tiara and opera length driving gloves, I needed to wear a stocking hat and down-filled mittens. Oh, the shame of it all. My grand itinerary was to drive to the trail, head up Logan Canyon, ride the snowmobile over the mountain to Hardware Ranch and see the legendary elk herd.

After I was a “butch thing” and unloaded the heavy snowmobile, we paused and had some chili and hot chocolate to warm us up before the ride. There, I did give in to my instincts just a bit as I set a formal table setting complete with lace tablecloth, linen napkins, china bowls and stoneware cocoa mugs. Of course Elaine believed that I was trying so hard to impress her, when in reality I was just trying to survive the day with a little bit of style and grace. Then off we raced, me

Come get Hunky Every Sunday night at The Tav

Alphey.com

Body Electric. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 801-654-2835

was used to. Meanwhile, on the back side of a drift where Elaine would not see, I wrote my name in the snow while quietly singing: “My penmanship is just frightful, But the color is so delightful, and since there’s no place to go, yellow snow, yellow snow, yellow snow.”

(As a point of interesting trivia, by the way: I do have one lesbian friend, Kathy, who is very proud of the fact that if she uses the tailgate of her truck for a balancing platform while performing some rather limber and creative gyrations worthy of Cirque du Soleil, she can spell her name in the snow.)

After we were moving again, the day continued in a downward spiral of misery and despair. We rounded a sharp corner too quickly and Elaine became a victim of centrifugal force, losing her grip on my waist and flying off the machine headfirst into a large drift. I stopped and dug her shivering, snow-covered body out of the drift, and decided that it was not that important to see the elk. To complete the disaster, as I yanked on the pull cord to start the engine for our return trip, I inadvertently hit Elaine in the mouth with my fist, cutting her lip into a bloody pulp.

That was it. I had had enough. After sacrificing poor Elaine on the altar of reparative therapy, there would be no more hetero dating for me! In later sessions, my therapist was very impressed with the dating stories that I invented and/or stole from books.

The moral of this story is that you can date a woman some of the time, but you can fool your therapist most of the time.

Like always, these events leave us with many important questions: 1. Would Miss Manners ever deem it proper to serve chili on a date?

2. Is “yellow snow” the reason that lemon is not a popular flavor for snow cones?

3. Is being able to pee anywhere the real reason women have penis envy?

4. Where can I buy a sequined snowmobile suit?

5. How does one best remove “skid marks?”

6. How many decibels does it take to totally mask a fart?

7. Is there a way to capture the methane to power the snowmobile?

These and other important questions to be answered in future chapters of The Perils of Petunia Pap-Smear. Q

Boyce’s Marine . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 801-466-6466 Cabin Fever. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 801-363-0828 Cahoots . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 801-538-0606 Cali’s Natural Foods . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 801-483-2254 Chapman-Richards & Assoc.. . . . . . . 801-278-4414 Club JAM. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . jamslc.com Club Karamba . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 801-696-0639 Club Püre. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 801-696-9061 Club Try-Angles . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 801-364-3203 The Dog Show . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 801-466-6100 Dog’s R Us . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 801-485-7387 Don Austin. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 801-485-9225 Done to Your Taste Catering. . . . . . . . 435-649-7503 Downtown Alliance. . . . . . . . . . . . . downtownslc.org Frida Bistro. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 801-983-6692 Jeff Garrison. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 801-503-4443 Katt’s Paw. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 801-448-6369 Kingsbury Hall. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . kingsburyhall.org KRCL-FM . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 801-363-1818 Landis Salon . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . landissalons.com MediCruiser. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 801-484-5504 MegaPhone, code 5772. . . . . . . . . . . 801-595-0005 Now Playing Utah . . . . . . . . . . . nowplayingutah.com Off Trax. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 801-364-4307 Omar’s Rawtopia. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 801-486-0332 Park City Performing Arts . . . . . . . . . ecclescenter.org Patton Group Properties. . . . . . . . . . . 801-412-7493 Pioneer Theatre Co.. . . . . . . . . . . . pioneertheatre.org Planned Parenthood. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ppau.org Pride Massage. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 801-486-5500 Rainbow Law. . . . . . facebook.com/rainbowlawutah Salt Lake Acting Co.. . . . . saltlakeactingcompany.org Julie Silveous Realtor. . . . . . . . . . . . . . 801-502-4507 Skinworks. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 801-530-0001 Squarepeg Concerts. . . . . . . squarepegconcerts.com The Tavernacle. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 801-519-8900 The Trapp. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 801-531-8727 Tin Angel Cafe . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 801-328-4155 Trolley Wing Co. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 801-538-0745 Uinta Brewing . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . uintabrewing.com Utah Pride Center . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 801-539-8800 Utah Symphony/Opera. . . . . . . . . utahsymphony.org Village Christmas Shoppe . . . . . . . . . 801-569-0320 Steve Walker . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 801-688-1918 Wesley Green Roofing. . . . . . . . . . . . . 801-486-3411 Jeff Williams Taxi . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 801-971-6287 Dr. Douglas Woseth. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 801-266-8841

J a n u a r y 0 7, 2 0 1 1 | i s s u e 1 7 1 | Q S a l t L a k e | 3 9

Q

e g a p k bac

Special Event Invitation:

Try Sam’s Club

FREE

January 11–13 Business Open House

Get up to a $25 Sam’s Club Gift Card when you become a Business Member.

For advertising rates, Call 801-649-6663

REAL WOMEN, REAL ADS

FACEBOOK FRIEND US facebook.com/qsaltlake

Free membership — Join Now!

GIRLDATES.NET

$99 CRUISE Great deals on last-minute cruises

MALE CAREGIVER

Miami-Bahamas 2 nights $99+

Residential Care

Miami-Bahamas 3 night $149+

Home Health Nurse Aide Samayoa@hotmail.com

(Example pricing. Subject to availability.)

801-326-7012

W Carribean 4 night $199+

LastMinuteCruisePro.com

Ninth Ave Treasures

utahgaydate.com

Consignments 704 9th Ave | 801-355-1233

Try Total Gym for 30 days for only $49.95

Dennis is Back!

(801) 598-8344

www.masseurformen.com

I WILL Clean your home for $50/mo

801-484-4306

4UR4PAWS PET MASSAGE “I Come to You,” Mary Norton, CPMP

801-739-4581

TAROT

Forecasting, Answers and Solutions to Your Life’s Questions at Gaea Univers Tarot. $20/60 mins. or $10/30 mins.

(801)916-7142

MEET GAY/BI MEN GayMates.com

including shipping!

Over 80 exercises to build, tone, strengthen your muscles.

1-866-200-0742

BOYCE’S MARINE WINTERIZATION!

QSaltLake Tweets @QSaltLake Gay Chat on your Phone

Specializing in older boats.

Inside heated storage available.

801-466-6466

Advertise on the Back Page and reach a highly-responsive market.

Call 801-649-6663 today!

Get the Gay Channel on JEFF WILLIAMS Network 801 971.6287 Dish 801..573.2786 Call now and get Logo, the channel for the

Meet Gay Men seeking Love or Action 1 Week at No Cost! Get 1 Free Match

UTAHGAYCHAT.COM

gay and lesbian community, and a $400 new customer bonus.

1-877-744-7517 Promo Code MB410

HOOKUP WITH GUYS FAST!

SMOKING ACCESSORIES Smokes On Redwood

Utah’s gay and lesbian news & entertainment magazine has the most dedicated and grateful readers in the state. Call today to advertise!

Search, Match and Reply FREE! 801-595-0005, Use Code 5772 Online – MegaMatesmen.com 18+

3411 S Redwood Rd, Ste. 1 West Valley, 801-410-4229

Hard Cruising Ads and Live Chat

HOOK UP FAST!

SM

Salt Lake City (801) 595.0005 Brigham City (435) 226.2226 Ogden (801) 317.1111 Provo (801) 805.0805

FREE

For other local numbers call

CODE 5291

1-888-MegaMates

TM

FREE to listen to ads.

FREE to reply to ads.

www.MegaMatesMen.com

1-888-634-2628

24/7 Friendly Customer Care 1(888) 634-2628 18+ ©2010 PC LLC

801-649-6663 1-800-806-7357

Anti-Aging & Skincare:

• BOTOX® Cosmetic • JUVÉDERM® • RADIESSE® Dermal Fillers • RADIESSE® for HIV/Facial Lipoatrophy • PREVELLE® SilkLip Augmentation • LATISSE® Lash Enhancer • Sun Damage Removal • Acne Care & Scar Removal • Obagi Skin Transformation

Weight Loss

• HCG Weight Loss Program • B12 & Vitamin Cocktail Injections • Nutritional Counseling • Lifestyle Counseling • Appetite Suppressants

Massage

• Hot Stone Massage • Couple Massage • Joava Body Wrap • 4-Handed Massage

Hair Care Nail Care Ion Cleansers Acupuncture Facials Laser Hair Removal Chemical Peels Microderm Abrasion Yoga Classes Belly Dancing Classes Classes Presented by Guruprasad Singh, MA, LPC • Yoga for Health & Happiness • Heal Your Addiction Now • Men Alive: Yoga & Meditation Exploreation Group for Men

A New Day Spa 3975 S Highland Drive Holladay, UT 84124

801-272-3900 anewdayspa.net