QSaltLake Magazine - January 21, 2010

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2010 Utah Legislative Session Utah Pride 2010 Theme Announced

Corroon Announces Gubernatorial Bid

Weekday Bar Rundown

DC Gay Marriages to Begin March 5

Staff Box publisher/editor

Michael Aaron assistant editor

In This Issue

JoSelle Vanderhooft arts & entertainment editor

Tony Hobday

ISSUE 146 • January 21, 2010

graphic designer

Christian Allred

A&E Utah 2010 Views Legislative From the Editor. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 4 Session . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 10 Queer Gnosis. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 15 Creep of Week. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 16 News Snaps & Slaps. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 16 National . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 6 Local. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 8

Mountain Meadow Mascara. . . . . . . 17 Lambda Lore . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 18

Gay Agenda . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 24 Crossword, Cryptogram. . . . . . . . . . 34 Comics . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 34 Qdoku. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 32 Anagram. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 30 Sports. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 22 Climacteric. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 39 Puzzle Answers. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 39 The Back Page. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 40

contributors

Chris Azzopardi Turner Bitton Dave Brousseau Mike E. Ellis Greg Fox Tony Hobday Keith Orr Anthony Paull Ruby Ridge A.E. Storm Ben Williams D’Anne Witkowski

Lynn Beltran Miles Broadhead Brad Di Iorio Chef Drew Ellswroth Bob Henline Christopher Katis Petunia Pap-Smear Steven Petrow Ryan Shattuck JoSelle Vanderhooft Troy Williams Rex Wockner

contributing photographers

Need Help Buyingor Selling?

I received the RE/MAX Executive Club Award in 2006

ASSOCIATES

David Daniels Laurie Kaufman

Brian Gordon David Newkirk

sales manager

Brad Di Iorio office manager

Tony Hobday distribution

Brad Di Iorio Gary Horenkamp

Ryan Benson Nancy Burkhart

publisher

Salt Lick Publishing, LLC 1055 East 2100 South, ste 206 Salt Lake City, Utah 84106 tel: 801-649-6663 toll-free: 1-800-806-7357 for general information:

info@qsaltlake.com for editorial queries:

editor@qsaltlake.com QSaltLake is a trademark of Salt Lick Publishing, LLC. Copyright © 2009, Salt Lick Publishing LLC. All rights reserved. No material may be reprinted or reproduced without written permission from the publisher. Copies of QSaltLake are distributed free of charge in 200 locations across Utah and in Idaho and Nevada. Free copies are limited to one per person. For additional copies, contact us at 801-649-6663. It is a crime to destroy or dispose of current issues or otherwise interfere with the distribution of this newsmagazine. Publication of the name or photograph of any individual or organization in articles or advertising in QSaltLake is not to be construed as any indication of the sexual orientation of such persons.

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J a nua r y 21 , 2010 | issue 1 46 | QSa lt L a k e | 3

From the Editor

Duck and Cover

by Michael Aaron

I

KNOW OTHERS SHARE MY DISDAIN FOR

this season, and friends from other areas of the country ask why I still live here if I hate it so much. I hide at home, curled in a blanket, beside the fireplace — which has 10 candles in it rather than a fire because of the red air alerts. While they provide nearly no heat, they give the glow that warms my heart just a bit.

And here I will stay until the season is over and it is semisafe to once again venture onto the streets of our fair city.

Yes, it’s the annual Legislative Session on Capitol Hill.

Oh — did you think I was talking about the weather? That’s nothing compared to what blasts out of the big building on the Hill for six weeks each winter.

It’s a scary time — one which can mean the end of another right or privilege we currently have or a new tax on some other sin we all participate in, be it smoking, drinking, coffee drinking or shopping on Sunday. Especially if we buy anything with a battery that vibrates.

I shiver wondering what this year will bring.

Thankfully, there are some who brave the winds, travel to the epicenter and draw their verbal swords to minimize the seasonal damage ... or maybe even eke out some progress through trickery or shame-throwing.

It is they who speak at committee

hearings, schmooze in the hallways, call their representatives, send them e-mails and letters full of great points and persuasive arguments. Or shame. Whatever it takes.

We have unearthed several bills being considered by the 2010 Legislative Session of which you may want to take notice. Some are rehashes from previous years, others are new ventures.They start on page 10.

We’ve also included a few resources for newcomers who are considering taking up weapons and making some noise themselves. Many more resources are available on the Utah Legislature’s Web site at le.utah.gov.

Next issue, we will talk about how you can become one of those delegates who rushes to meetings to replace outgoing elected officials who seem to be dropping like flies lately. From attending precinct caucuses to getting elected to committees at all levels of local government.

Me, I’m staying on this comfy couch watching the new season of American Idol, wearing an aluminum helmet and doing what I can not to read the newspapers, the blogs and the gazillion tweets of the latest “omg I can’t believe they said...” and “another legislator was caught with his/her (well, it’s never her is it) pants down.”

I will emerge March 12 and survey the damage at that time, determined to rebuild. Q

That’s nothing compared to what blasts out of the big building on the hill for six weeks each winter

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News — National

by rex wockner and QSALTLAKE STAFF

Gay Weddings to Start in D.C. March 5

Gay marriages will start in the District of Columbia, the latest locality to legalize same-sex marriage, on March 5.

That’s when the bill passed by the Council and signed by the mayor will have completed its mandated congressional review period and any couples who obtained a license on the first day possible, March 2, will have made it through the mandatory three-day waiting period between getting a license and getting married.

Same-sex marriage is legal in Belgium, Canada, the Netherlands, Norway, South Africa, Spain and Sweden; in Argentina’s Tierra del Fuego province; and in the U.S. states of Connecticut, Iowa, Massachusetts, New Hampshire and Vermont. It will become legal in Portugal in April. —RW

Utah State Rep Carrying Baby for Gay Friends Utah lesbian state Rep. Christine Johnson, D-Salt Lake City, is pregnant with the sperm of one-half of a gay couple who are close friends of hers, and she will give them the child when it is born around June 21.

“To watch them get emotional when we look at the ultrasound and we see their baby, it is so gratifying for me to know I’m helping them become a family,” Johnson told The Salt Lake Tribune.

“They are, in concert, just going to be perfect parents.”

“Not only am I a single mother who’s pregnant, but I’m also a lesbian mother who is pregnant and having a baby for two gay men. That might be startling to some,” she acknowledged. —RW

Bozeman Protects Gays and Transgenders The City Commission in Bozeman, Mont., on Jan. 11 added “sexual orientation” and “gender identity” to a policy that protects city employees from discrimination. The vote was 3-0.

The policy also extends spousal benefits to employees’ same-sex partners. —RW

Vegas’ Krave In Bankruptcy

Quips & Quotes ❝❝

He thought it would be nutritious for the baby.”

—Rep. Christine Johnson, D-Salt Lake, on Sen. Howard Stephenson, R-Draper bringing her eggs from his farm because of the surrogate baby she is carrying for a gay couple.

❝❝

Attorneys for both sides are arguing the constitutionality of California’s Proposition 8 in the U.S. District Court building in San Francisco

Prop 8 Federal Trial Continues in San Francisco News analysis by Rex Wockner

At press time, the trial in the federal lawsuit against Proposition 8 was continuing in U.S. District Court in San Francisco before Judge Vaughn Walker.

Famous heterosexual attorneys Ted Olson and David Boies are trying to convince Walker that Prop 8, which amended California’s constitution to re-ban same-sex marriage, violates the U.S. Constitution’s guarantees of due process and equal protection under the law.

Leading gay-rights groups have been sidelined in the case, limited to filing “friend of the court” briefs, because they didn’t play nice with Olson and Boies early on. They publicly dissed the case as unwise and poorly timed.

The lawsuit, which likely will end up before the U.S. Supreme Court, could lead to the legalization of same-sex marriage in all 50 states.

Conversely, it also could possibly stall the movement for same-sex marriage for a generation, should the U.S. Supreme Court uphold Prop 8.

Judge Walker had wanted to beam video of the trial to other federal courthouses and post it on YouTube, but the U.S. Supreme Court, in a 5-4 ruling, put the kibosh on that idea Jan. 13, saying officials in the federal courts’ 9th Circuit hadn’t followed proper procedure in lifting the ban on cameras in federal courts.

Olson and Boies strongly supported broadcasting the trial. The pro-Prop-8 side vociferously opposed the plan, ultimately filing an emergency appeal to the Supreme Court to stop it.

Gay activists and commentators suggested that Prop 8 defenders were horrified at the idea of the trial being broadcast because they know that their anti-gay rhetoric, which is being analyzed in detail at the trial, is hateful, false and, when exposed in full, so unpalatable and embarrassing that it could turn the public against them.

The owner of the only gay bar on The Strip in Las Vegas has filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy, reports the Las Vegas Review-Journal.

Sia Amiri, who operates the Krave nightclub and the nearby Harmon Theater, said the businesses will remain open during the bankruptcy process.

Krave is known for great acrobatic shows, gorgeous go-go dancers, and upscale facilities. Harmon Avenue, the street both Krave and the theater are located on, has been closed during construction of the mammoth CityCenter project across the street. —MA 6 | QSa lt L a k e | issue 1 46 | J a nua r y 21 , 2010

Information introduced during the trial on Jan. 13, for example, revealed that one defendant in the case, Hak-Shing William Tam, wrote a letter to voters during the Prop 8 campaign saying that once gays have the right to marry, they will pursue legalization of pedophilia.

“On their agenda list is: legalize having sex with children,” the letter said.

It also claimed that legal same-sex marriage in California would cause “other states (to) fall into Satan’s hands.”

Prop 8’s lawyers claimed they didn’t want cameras in court for, among other reasons, fear that their witnesses could face nasty retaliation from militant, if not violent, homosexual thugs who saw the video feed.

The anti-same-sex-marriage side also objected to the playing in court of their successfully alarmist TV ads from the Prop 8 campaign, which suggested that gay marriage could lead to schoolchildren being taught inappropriate, bad or wrong things.

Many analysts and commentators believe the gay-marriage-will-harmyour-kids TV ads may have tipped the balance against same-sex marriage in the minds of voters both in California and, more recently, Maine, where some of the California ads were recycled.

The Prop 8 trial is being live-blogged, tweeted and analyzed to within an inch of its life by an army of bloggers, activists and news reporters.

Prop8trialtracker.com is a good place to start. The San Jose Mercury News also has a good live-blog of the case at mercurynews.com.

On Jan. 15, the Courage Campaign, which operates prop8trialtracker, refused to alter the site’s logo, after the group was hit with a cease-and-desist demand from protectmarriage.com.

The two sites’ logos are identical except for one minor, humorous variation. See tinyurl.com/logosgate. Courage Campaign said its logo qualifies as permissible parody.

Rep. Christine Johnson has entered into this with pride, honesty and boundless generosity. This lawmaker figured out a way to help some friends at a time and a place when the law wasn’t on their side. But, thanks to Christine, some lawmakers are. That’s certainly a step in the right direction.”

—Change.org blogger Maia Spotts.

❝❝

So Utah is debating a nondiscrimination ordinance and Texas isn’t. And Utah has a lesbian legislator and Texas doesn’t.”

—Dallas Voice blogger David Taffet about Johnson’s pregnancy.

❝❝

[W]hile I’m a fan of both Ben and Arlyn and truly [sic] would have been happy either way, right now Ben is the more qualified person for the job. We must avoid childish stereotypes in this state because we cannot afford any mistakes, there are too many in the majority party fighting against us to have such mundane squabbles.”

—Blogger and gay activist Eric Ethington sounding off about charges that gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender Democrats who supported Ben McAdams over openly gay candidate Arlyn Bradshaw as a replacement for Sen. Scott McCoy are “traitors.”

❝❝

The Legislature is more inclined to give the Salt Lake City ordinance[s] a year just to kind of see how [they work] and if we need to work any bugs out before we sponsor anything statewide.”

—Sen. Howard Stephenson, R-Draper, telling The Salt Lake Tribune that the Legislature will likely not approve a statewide housing and employment nondiscrimination ordinance that covers sexual orientation and gender identity this session.

News —World

Nepal Constitution to Protect Gays

Sexual minorities in Nepal will be the first in Asia to be guaranteed equal rights under a newly drafted constituion, according to the Hindustan Times.

The constitution is set to be drafted by May and will include antidiscrimination protections for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and intersex citizens. “Rights for LGBTIs have been well drafted in the new constitution. They will ensure nondiscrimination and separate citizenship IDs for third-gendered people,� Sunil Babu Pant, Nepal’s first openly gay lawmaker, said in the article.—RS

Lawyers Say Semenya Not Disqualified to Compete Lawyers for athlete Caster Semenya said Jan. 18 she had not been dis-

Caster Semenya

qualified from participating in future meets.

Following Semenya’s victory at the 2009 World Championships, questions were raised about her gender and the possibility she is intersexed. Results of tests conducted to determine her gender are still pending.

There was much confusion last week when her coach Michael Seme announced she would participate in at least three local competitions.

Sports governing body Sascoc then ruled the athlete could not take part in any local or international events until the IAAF gave her the green light.

Her lawyers claimed her rights were being infringed.

They emphasised Semenya was a world champion and had committed no wrongdoing.—TW

Haiti Quake: Ceiling Fell on Gay Group, 14 Killed

A gay support worker in Haiti says he lost 14 members of his group as the devastating earthquake hit Port-au-Prince last week. “We were having our usual support group meeting on a quiet Tuesday afternoon when the worst happened,� recounts gay and bi HIV support service SEROvie worker Steve La Guerre. “The sound is unforgettable. I can’t even describe the horror as the ceiling and the wall of the conference room started to fall and the chaos started. “Fourteen young men were lost forever in the earthquake. Paul Emile, the leader of the group, and Stacy were the only survivors,� he said in an e-mail message. —PR

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J a nua r y 21 , 2010  |  issue 1 46  |  QSa lt L a k e  |  7

News — Local

Qmmunity

Gay-Friendly SL County Mayor to Run for Governor

ongoing economic downturn. Rather On Dec. 12, Democratic Salt Lake Coun- than raising or slashing taxes to solve ty Mayor Peter Corroon officially an- the state’s budget crisis, Corroon earnounced his candidacy for governor in lier told The Salt Lake Tribune that he this November’s face off against Repub- favored a more “balanced approach” to budgeting. “You can’t cut your way to lican incumbent Gary Herbert.

Herbert replaced former Gov. Jon economic success,” he said. It is a motto Huntsman last August after Huntsman’s that has served him well as mayor; in appointment as U.S. Ambassador to Chi- 2009 Corroon cut Salt Lake County’s na. Thus, he must run again this year to budget by $142 million, in part by raising property taxes and requiring residents secure the office.

Since taking office in 2004, on the in unincorporated parts of the county to heels of the embattled administration pay more for police services.

Along with this reputation for fiscal of Republican Mayor Nancy Workman, Corroon, then a relative political new- conservatism that may win him support comer, has become known in Northern from the state’s more conservative resiUtah as not only a fiscally conservative dents, Corroon is also an outspoken supDemocrat but as a supporter of rights for porter for gay and transgender rights. gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender When Equality Utah launched its Come Utahns. On his watch, the Salt Lake City OUT Utah program last February, in Council has enacted an adult designee which businesses across Utah joined program that extends the insurance ben- the statewide group in calling for legal efits of gay and lesbian county employ- protections for gay and transgender citiees to domestic partners, and is just one zens, Corroon addressed a crowd of gay step away from enacting an ordinance rights leaders at Golden Braid Books. At forbidding workplace and housing dis- that time he said of the push to end houscrimination on the basis of sexual ori- ing and employment discrimination based on sexual orientation and gender entation and gender identity.

In an interview with QSaltLake con- identity: “These aren’t special rights but ducted the morning of his campaign basic rights for all of us.”

“I think all our citizens should be announcement, Corroon said that a number of factors lead him to front a able to work, live and support their gubernatorial run, including calls by loved ones without discrimination,” he a number of Utahns to “draft” him for told QSaltLake 11 months later. “It’s not the office. As early as May of last year, about whether you’re gay or straight, for example, supporters created the Fa- it’s about treating everyone equally, and cebook group “Draft Peter Corroon for in Salt Lake County it’s about retaining Governor in 2010.” Today it has over good employees, too.”

Additionally, Corroon said he is sup1,000 members. Additionally, Corroon discussed a potential run with a num- portive of a number of other rights for ber of elected officials and supporters of gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender both major party affiliation.

“I got a lot of good support and felt it was a race that was winnable,” he said.

Although many in the press have noted that a Democrat has not lead the state The year 2010 is still new and uncertain. since 1980, Corroon does not think that 29 Will it contain romance? Luck? Good years of Republican leadership will pose fortune? Health? Or at least better things than last year did? any barrier to a victory at the polls.

These and other questions may be an“I think it’s time for a Democrat to win, but it’s not about whether some- swered during Noche Latina’s New Year one’s a Democrat or Republican,” he of Mystery, to be held in the Utah Pride said. “It’s about who can move Utah Center’s rear parking lot on Jan. 29 at 7 forward and make Utah a leader in the p.m. Here, Tarot readers and palm readers will be on hand to provide, perhaps, an West and I think I’m that candidate.”

Among Corroon’s goals for Utah are insight into the coming months. For those strengthening the state’s education sys- who simply want to get rid of last year’s tem — a move which he says will also less savory memories, the Center’s fire pit strengthen the state’s floundering econ- will be roaring and ready to accept scraps omy — and making the Beehive State a of paper containing, as Center HIV Prevention Coordinator and Noche Latina leader in energy independence.

“We have gas, oil and coal but we also founder Lillian Rodriguez put it, “things have great sun and wind energy and geo- they want to forget from 2009 so they can move forward into the future.” thermal energy,” he said.

“The whole premise is we don’t know Corroon has also questioned a number of Herbert’s decisions, including what the future holds,” said Rodriguez the governor’s allowance of radioac- of the event. “It’s about moving forward tive waste to be imported into Utah and into the future.”

Noche Latina is the Center’s social and his pledge not to raise taxes during the 8 | QSa lt L a k e | issue 1 46 | J a nua r y 21 , 2010

SAGE Mardi Gras SAGE, the Utah Pride Center’s social group for gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender and queer individuals age 50 and over, will hold a Mardi Gras party and reading of the work of gay poets.

When: Feb. 13, 6:30–8:30 p.m.

Where: David Turner’s home (call for directions) RSVP: 801-201-0350 or e-mail Jennifer Nuttall at jennifer@utahpridecenter.org

by JoSelle Vanderhooft

Genderland Expands

Salt Lake County Mayor Peter Corroon addressing the Utah Stonewall Democrats caucus citizens, including probate rights and adoption. On the question of civil unions, however, he noted that Utah voters had elected to constitutionally prohibit gay marriage in 2004, and that he would not be supporting a push to legalize such unions as governor.

“I don’t think our state is ready for that,” he said.

In the months leading up to November’s election, Corroon said he hopes that the state’s gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender community will support him, especially as he embarks on a tour of the state’s 29 counties in an attempt to dialogue with all residents.

“I’d like to be an independent voice of Utah, someone who will stand up and do what’s right,” he said. Q

Noche Latina and the Year of Mystery outreach program to Utah’s Latino/a community. The program, said Gonzales, began last October after Center leaders discussed how they could create “ways in which we can engage our Latino community in creating an event for them.” The group holds a special event each month. In October, for example, it held a celebration for the Day of the Dead, the Latin American observance of All Souls Night, or Halloween. In November, it sponsored a bilingual poetry slam, held, as all Noche Latina nights are, in Spanish and English.

Refreshments for Year of Mystery, as at any Noche Latina event, will be provided, as will coffee from Café Marmalade, the Center’s in-house coffee shop and bistro. Noche Latina events are open to the public and held on the last Friday of each month. For more information, contact Lillian Rodriguez at 801-539-8800, ex. 23 or Lillian@utahpridecenter.org. Q

Genderland, the Utah Pride Center’s weekly social night for transgender and genderqueer youth or youth who find conventional gender roles to be too restrictive, now welcomes youth age 14–22. It meets weekly on Tuesday night from 3–9 p.m. in the Center’s youth activities space.

Info: Rose Ellen, 801-539-8800, ex. 17

COLAGE Ice Skating Children of Lesbians and Gays Everywhere, the Utah Pride Center’s group for the children of gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender parents, will hold a bring a friend ice skating social later this month.

Youth are advised to dress warmly (and wear winter-appropriate socks) and to bring friends and family.

When: Jan. 22, 5–7 p.m.

Where: Gallivan Center Ice Skating Rink, 239 S. Main St. RSVP: By Jan. 20 to Cara Cerise at caracerise@hotmail.com or 801539-8800, ex.13

Utah HRC Gala The date for Utah’s sixth annual HRC Utah Gala Dinner has been moved to May 8 at the Grand America Hotel, 555 South Main St. Tickets will be available soon.

PPAC Rally The Planned Parenthood Action Council will hold a rally in the Capitol Rotunda on Jan. 21, at 3:30 p.m., four days before the Utah State Legislature convenes for its general session. The rally will be in support of comprehensive reproductive health education, an item on this year’s legislature’s agenda.

Lavender Graduation The University of Utah will again hold Lavender Graduation on May 6, in honor of gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender, questioning and allied graduating students. The event will include a short program and the gifting of rainbow tassels to participants. For more information contact Katie Stiel at kstiel@a.utah.edu.

Utah Pride Announces 2010 Theme The Utah Pride Center, the organization behind the annual Utah Pride Festival, has announced that the theme for this year’s celebration will be Our History, Our Future.

“We are very conscious of the fact this is the 40 year [anniversary] of Pride celebrations in our country,” said Michael Westley, the Center’s media and special events coordinator. “On the heels of a very politically-charged year for the LGBTQ community, we felt strongly that we wanted a theme that would talk about where we stand, and understanding where we stand right now has great importance for where we’re coming from, yet we feel like we’re making great strides in where we’re going.”

Westley said the Center got the idea for the theme from remarks outgoing board president Fran Pruyn made when describing the assets incoming president Nikki Boyer (the board’s former development chair) would bring to the Center as a leader. Boyer is also the chair of the Utah Stonewall Democrats, the party’s gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender caucus. She has been an activist in the state’s gay, lesbian, bisexu-

al and transgender rights community since the 1960s. “[Pruyn] said Nikki is the perfect person to be director, because she’s our history and our future,” said Westley. “Because Nikki has a history in the valley and has brought a lot of help especially to youth who often don’t know a lot about our history, and she will be paving the way for a better future for all of us.”

“We’re incredibly proud to have Nikki leading the board, and we believe her leadership is going to help the Center as well as the Pride Festival remember where we’ve come from and chart the path of where we’re going, which are both essential to

LEAGUE Foundation Offers Scholarship to Gay, Transgender Youth For the last 14 years, the Lesbian, Bisexual, Gay and Transgender United Employees at AT&T have offered scholarships to openly gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender students graduating high school.

So far, a Utahn has yet to win one, with applications pouring in each year from all 50 states.

But perhaps 2010 is the year for the state’s fortunes to change. Until April 30, the foundation will be accepting applications for each of its three scholarships: The LEAGUE Foundation Scholarship, The Matthew Shepard Memorial Scholarship and the Laurel Hester Memorial Scholarship.

Begun in 1996 the foundation is the country’s oldest employee resource group to get corporate sponsorship (from phone company AT&T) for gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender employees, said Charles Eader, the foundation’s executive director. In its first year, said Eader, the foundation offered just one scholarship, which was donated by the AT&T employees as a way of “giving back to the community.” In 1999, just one year after the brutal murder of Laramie, Wyo. college student Matthew Shepard, a crime which shocked the nation and changed the discussion around gay rights in America, the foundation also began offering a scholarship in his name with the support of Shepard’s mother, Judy.

In 2006, the foundation created anoth-

er scholarship, this one in honor of Laurel Hester, a New Jersey policewoman who, while dying of cancer, fought county freeholders for the ability to leave her pension to her partner Stacie Andree. Hester’s struggle was the subject of Cynthia Wade 2007 documentary Freeheld, which won the Special Jury Prize at that year’s Sundance Film Festival and an Academy Award for Best Documentary Short Film.

“A lot of our board members live in New Jersey which is how we picked up on what was going on with Laurel Hester,” said Eader. “The personal liberty fund of the New Jersey Lesbian and Gay Coalition wanted to start a scholarship in Laurel’s memory but didn’t have the resources to manage it.” When the coalition raised the money for the scholarship, Eader said they turned it over to the LEAGUE Foundation to be administered, and when funding ran out in 2009, the foundation continued the scholarship with its own donations.

Eader stressed that students pursuing all areas of study, including certificates and degrees from junior colleges and technical schools, are welcome to apply for all three scholarships.

“We try not to limit ourselves,” he said.

The applications, he added, are read by the foundation’s 12-member board, who are each allowed to score them as they see fit.

our success,” he continued.

Although the Center will not announce the festival’s featured performers or the Utah Pride Parade’s Grand Marshal for a number of months, it is now accepting applications from local entertainers and vendors (including food services).

These applications will be live on its Web site, Utahpride.org, later this month.

Likewise, the Center is seeking volunteers for the festival, including volunteers to fill a number of key leadership roles. Westley said the festival is looking for an individual with experience with food

handling — and restaurant and catering experience in particular — to assist food vendors at the event. “[This volunteer should] understand food safety and preparation [and] be able to come and oversee our food operations, to make sure those vendors are taken care of and everything they’re doing is done in safety and compliance with the law,” he said. “That keen eye, we believe, will serve us and our community well.”

The festival is also looking for stage managers for each of its four stages, transportation equipment managers and captains for each of the festival grounds’ four quadrants. Last year, Westley said he and another volunteer handled all issues pertaining to vendors needs, logistics and conflict resolution at the festival, and since then the Center has decided that dividing responsibilities among four people would make handling all such issues easier. “ All leadership positions require attending twice monthly meetings, which will begin in February or March and take place on Wednesday evenings.

“You’re going to experience Pride a little differently than usual, but you’re going to have fun doing it,” said Westley of volunteering at the festival. Q

“Some board members think that LGBT-specific community service is more important than general community service,” said Eader. “For others, academics are the highest criteria. The interesting thing, and I’ve been doing this since the beginning, is when we come together to make the selections, even though board members are looking for different things, we always seem to come to a consensus on awardees for that year. There’s a natural fall where the line is drawn.”

When asked what advice he would give to students applying for the awards, Eader said that “being well-rounded is probably the biggest attention-getter for us.”

Eader also encouraged members of Utah’s gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender community who admire the foundation’s goals to consider donating their time to the organization.

“We’re looking always for additional board members and volunteers to help us raise awareness, including bringing [information about us] to schools in the area, especially gay-straight alliances.

We don’t have enough manpower at this point to be able to send a letter to every single GSA or guidance counselor or organization or newspaper.”

He added that the LEAGUE Foundation is very proud of its all-volunteer nature, which keeps overhead costs low and donates nearly all of its money back to the students.

“These students are going to be tomorrow’s community leaders and we want to make sure they get a positive start,” he said. Q

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J a nua r y 21 , 2010 | issue 1 46 | QSa lt L a k e | 9

2010 Legislative Preview I n just a few days after this edition

of QSaltLake hits the streets, the Utah Legislature will convene for its 2010 general session. As always, the next two months will feature a number of bills seeking to affect Utah’s gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender population, for good and for ill. Here are those that have been announced so far.

Fair Workplace and Housing In 2009, Salt Lake City made history when its council unanimously passed two ordinances prohibiting the city’s landlords and employers from discriminating on the basis of sexual orientation or gender identity. In the early days of 2010, Salt Lake County passed an identical ordinance, and Park City has promised to soon do the same. Although more municipalities are becoming open to the idea of having such laws on the Rep. Christine Johnson books, Rep. Christine Johnson will still aim to pass a gay and transgender-inclusive housing and employment law this session. This will mark the third year the Salt Lake City Democrat has proposed such a law — her bill failed to make it to the House floor for debate in both 2008 and 2009.

While Johnson said that she considered dividing the workplace and housing components of her bill into two separate pieces of legislation, in much the way Salt Lake City did with its ordinances, in part because of challenges the bill’s housing component may face from legislators who work in the housing industry.

“The harder hurdle for us on a statewide basis is the housing component, because we have so many landlords and real estate agents and property owners in our legislature,” she said.

“They really have heartburn over putting even a guideline of nondiscrimination [based on sexual orientation or gender identity] in their business practice.”

Ultimately, however, Johnson decided to keep her bill the same as in its two previous incarnations.

“If it’s the will of the committee to divide and handle them separately, so be it, but I’d rather preserve the original integrity of the bill,” she said.

At press time, Johnson’s bill was Senate President Michael Waddoups, still being written. Before it is enrolled R-Taylorsville, told the paper that and made available for viewing on the other municipalities’ enthusiasm to Legislature’s Web site, it must be sent pass similar ordinances was cause for to the Legislator’s fiscal analyst to de- concern. termine what the bill, if passed, would “If everybody’s going to do it, we’d cost the state. just as soon weigh in as wait. It’s hard“That expense is primarily going er to overturn 20 [ordinances like Salt to come out of the Attorney General’s Lake City’s] than to overturn two or office, since it will be their responsi- three,” he said. bility to defend against any litigation As in years past, statewide gay against the state as an employer,” she and transgender rights organization explained. However, she noted that the Equality Utah will sponsor Johnson’s bill will likely be available for perusal bill. In 2009 her legislation was part of

by Jan. 25, the session’s opening day, the group’s Common Ground Initiaat the latest. tive, a set of four bills aimed at expandAt press time, Johnson said she has ing protections to gay, lesbian, bisexnot secured a Senate co-sponsor for ual and transgender Utahns in such the bill, but that “conversations are additional areas as probate rights and still underway” with two Senate Re- inheritance laws. publicans about signing their name to Despite the reappearance of Johnthe document. son’s bill — one of the two returning “I’m more concerned about how the to the Hill this January, Executive Proposition 8 movie and the rallies Director Brandie Balken said Equaland the influence of national organi- ity Utah would continue its more rezations will impact my ability to ad- cent strategy of approaching municivance my two pro-equality bills,” said pal governments to enact ordinances Johnson, referring to the documentary similar to Salt Lake City’s. When the 8: The Mormon Proposition which will session ends, she added, Equality Utah screen at the Sundance Film Festival will also be continuing conversations this month, and the several rallies lo- with Gov. Gary Herbert about extendcal gay rights activists such as Jacob ing health care benefits to non-spousal Whipple are planning around its vari- adult designees — including gay and ous screenings. lesbian partners — of state employ“I’m expecting that it’s going to be ees. very tense [on the Hill] not only beIf Johnson’s bill does pass, Balken cause of the current state of the state said Equality Utah would “begin the with our budget and revenue short- business of reaching out to commufall, but it’s going to be a challenging nity and letting them know how these year to temper the political pressure protections function and the mechaoutside of the Capitol from that film,” nism for them to access them.” she continued, noting that she has no plans to see the film at Sundance. “It’s going to be a mess. I just want to stay Another bill from last year’s Common clear of it and focus on my legislative Ground package that will reappear on responsibilities. It’s not going to be an the Hill this January is one that would opportunity for me to wear my activgrant people ist hat.” in a same-sex While some legislators have rerelationship sponded favorably to the idea of exthe right to tending a Salt Lake City-like ordinance bring suit if statewide (including, most amazingly, their partner anti-gay West Jordan Republican Sen. dies due to Chris Buttars), many have said that negligence or Johnson’s bill will likely not pass in medical mal2010. practice. The “Nothing has changed,” House Mabill, which jority Leader Kevin Garn, R-Layton, does not bear told The Salt Lake Tribune when asked Equality if Johnson’s legislation had a good Sen. Ben McAdams Utah’s imprichance of passing. “The result will matur this year, was first introduced probably be the same as last year.” in 2007 by then-senator Scott McCoy, Garn did say, however, that the who resigned last December. Just Legislature would likely not overrule weeks after being elected as McCoy’s Salt Lake City’s ordinances, which replacement, Sen. Ben McAdams, Dare scheduled to take effect April 2.

Salt Lake City, announced that he will Indeed, at press time, no legislator take up the bill for its fourth year. had entered such a bill. Nevertheless,

10 | QSa lt L a k e | issue 1 46 | J a nua r y 21 , 2010

Wrongful Death

“Well currently, if my wife died because a drunk truck driver hit her and killed her, I could sue the negligent driver for wrongful death and get compensation, because we’re inter-dependent,” McAdams told Eric Ethington, owner of gay rights blog “PRIDE in Utah” on Jan. 10. “But a same-sex couple or any other inter-dependent but unmarried adults wouldn’t be able to make that claim. The genius of this bill is that it’s not just about samesex partners, but all inter-dependent adults like mothers and daughters living together.”

By contrast, the 2009 incarnation of McCoy’s bill sought only limited protections for same-sex partners, such as allowing them to join a suit only if the deceased’s children, family or former spouse allowed it.

McAdams has made the bill one of his priorities this session, he said, because people in non-spousal relationships currently cannot seek any other form of redress when their partners die due to medical malpractice or negligence. “[T]his bill highlights that there are many responses the legislature has given that these things [i.e. protections in cases of wrongful death] can be accomplished in contract,” he said.

“But how often do people go out and do the contract? How often are people going to have what they need in place for an emergency? My wife and I are both attorneys and we haven’t even had a contract put together. So there’s a need to change the law. But it’s more than that, a wrongful death is different than hospital visitation, in that there’s no way to contract for it.”

“This is something the Republicans can afford to support, both ethically and politically. It’s a good bill,” he concluded.

At press time, McAdams’ bill had yet to be enrolled. McAdams did not respond to a message left by QSaltLake seeking further comment.

Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell

In addition to her fair employment and housing bill, Johnson also plans to introduce a House Joint Resolution asking the U.S. Congress to overturn the military’s infamous Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell policy by passing the Military Readiness Enhancement Act of 2009. The military’s policy, which prohibits gay, lesbian and bisexual servicemembers from serving openly, is routinely used to dismiss any who come out or whose sexuality is discovered. Johnson’s resolution is enrolled and numbered as HJR 004.

“We know that over 13,000 men and women have been discharged because of Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell, and there are 65,000 gay and lesbian sevicemembers on active duty,” said Johnson, adding that the government has spent up to $1.2 billion to “investigate, eliminate and replace qualified and patriotic servicemembers” under the policy, which has been in effect since the Clinton administration.

“It’s cost prohibitive to keep this in place,” she said.

Along with Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’s high financial and personal cost to the military and to the nation at large, HJR 004 also mentions the troop shortages to which the policy has contributed, the fact that openly gay servicemembers are allowed to serve in the military of 24 other countries, and the fact that transgender servicemembers are also harassed under the policy “on the basis of nongender-conforming [sic] behavior.”

Johnson said she drafted the resolution in honor of a friend, a servicemember who committed suicide after being discharged under Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell. She said she looks forward

to sharing a few facts about the woman’s experience of being “invisible” in the military, when introducing the resolution.

When it comes to getting straight legislators to understand the harm that policies like Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell cause, Johnson said, “like any issue that involves a minority community there’s a huge education hurdle.”

Nonetheless, she added that she was “very hopeful that because our legislature has been so supportive of the military particularly because of Hill Air Force Base [which is located in Utah] that they’ll seriously consider” what she has to say.

“It’s a resolution,” she added. “It’s requesting, it’s not a mandate or a statute. It’s nothing more than a suggestion that Congress do this and act quickly. I don’t know how my colleagues are going to feel, but I will have that conversation and I will talk about my friend who took her life and what she told me.”

10th Amendment One possible, though perhaps counterintuitive, pro-gay topic before the Leg-

islature this session is the Constitution’s 10th Amendment, which states that all legal powers not reserved by the federal government or prohibited to the states, are reserved for the states, or to the people. No less than five resolutions in support the concept of states’ rights, or encouraging the federal government to repeal laws that infringe upon them, are currently enrolled in the session.

Although the concept of states’ rights has often been used against gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender people — as in the passage and reinforcement of the Defense of Marriage Act, which allows states not to recognize same-sex marriages performed in other states — David Nelson, a community activist and the owner of Stonewall Shooting Sports of Utah said that these resolutions may be helpful to gay and transgender Utahns. In explaining why, he cited a recent lawsuit filed

by Massachusetts Attorney General Martha Coakley which states that the commonwealth’s right to marry samesex couples is protected by the 10th Amendment.

“In states like Utah, that would like-

ly mean that marriage would unfortunately be defined as it always has been defined by many state legislatures,” he said. “In states like Massachusetts, that would also mean that the federal DOMA could be nullified by a state. ...

In some states, the consideration is because of what they see as overreaching by the federal government regarding the current federal health care bill or bank bailouts. In other states, the consideration is because of what they see as overreaching by the federal government regarding the same-sex marriage or medical marijuana. Whatever reason Utah’s majority chooses, supporting a strengthened 10th Amendment will aid our gay-friendly states far more than a weakened amendment.”

“Bottom line, however, is that the 10th Amendment protects every state against unconstitutional federal imposition,” he continued. “The exercise of the 10th Amendment protections in Utah will do no more harm to gay couples and families than has already been done by our state, but it will help bolster the arguments of states like Massachusetts to expand marriage where we cannot.” Q

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News –2010 Legislative Preview

Gay Adoption Bill Returns For the third successive year, Rep. Rebecca Chavez-Houck, D-Salt Lake City, will run a bill that seeks to allow gay and lesbian couples to adopt children, something they have been unable to do since 2000, when the state Legislature restricted adoption to single and legally married people.

Although C h a v e z Houck’s bill had not been enrolled and numbered at press time, the representative said its 2010 incarnation would differ Rep. Rebecca Chavez-Houck from that of previous years. This time, she said she will focus largely on an attempt to legalize second parent adoptions for same-sex couples. This is the practice in which the non-biological partner adopts his or her partner’s biological child. The emphasis on the right of all Utahns to determine who should raise their biological children, she said, might be easier for legislators to understand and agree with than the possibility of a same-sex couple adopting a child not related to either partner.

“What gave me some hope was a poll Equality Utah did last year,” said Chavez-Houck, referring to the statewide gay and transgender rights group’s survey of Utahns’ opinions on a number of gay rights initiatives just before the 2009 session’s opening. “[It showed that] while people were still struggling with supporting the concept of gay couples adopting, there seemed

How an Idea Becomes a Law An Idea Is Developed. A legislator draws from numerous sources in deciding what should be introduced in the Legislature as a bill. Major sources of ideas come from constituents, government agencies, special interest groups, lobbyists, the Governor, and the legislator.

The Bill is Drafted. The idea is submitted to the Office of Legislative Research and General Counsel, a nonpartisan legislative staff office, in the form of a bill request. The assigned bill drafting attorney reviews existing law, researches the issues, and prepares the bill in proper technical form. The bill is given a number. A fiscal review is conducted and a “Fiscal Note” is attached. The bill is also reviewed for statutory or constitutional concerns.

The Bill is Introduced. The bill is introduced into the Legislature and referred to the Rules Committee.

to be an affinity and understanding of parental rights when the question was couched as, ‘Would you support a second parent adoption if the other parent has legal rights to the child?”

“I took that to heart and am very encouraged by the fact that Utahns see the inequity that currently exists when someone is a parent” and lacks any legal standing to support the child in his or her care, she said.

Chavez-Houck’s revamped bill comes nearly six months to the day after one Utah lesbian experienced exactly what that lack of legal standing meant. In July, a Salt Lake City 3rd District Court ruled that Gena Edvalson was a legal stranger to the 3-year-old son she and former partner Jana Dickson had conceived before breaking up in 2007.

Despite the two having signed a co-parenting agreement, the only proof of a same-sex or unmarried couple’s desires to raise children together that Utah law currently allows, Dickson was legally entitled to prevent Edvalson from seeing their child. After the ruling, Edvalson’s attorney Lauren Barros said she would no longer recommend co-parenting agreements to her gay and lesbian clients. Barros also served as council in the 2007 watershed case of Jones v.

Barlow. Here, the Utah Supreme Court overturned a non-biological mother’s order of visitation and declared that such parents had no rights to the children they were raising.

Chavez-Houck, who knows both Edvalson and Dickson, called the case “a very heartwrenching situation.”

“Whatever we can do to strengthen the law to help people in this situation I’m all for,” she said.

Despite Utah’s ban on adoptions by

The Bill Receives Standing Committee Review and Public Input. The Rules Committee recommends to the presiding officer the standing committee to which the bill should be referred. The standing committee, in an open meeting, reviews the bill and receives public testimony. The committee may amend, hold, table, substitute, or make a favorable recommendation on the bill.

The Bill Is Returned to the Floor.

Following the committee hearing the bill is returned to the full house with a committee report. The committee reports the bill out favorably, favorably with amendments, substituted, or that the bill has been tabled.

The Bill is Debated in Open Session.

The bill is debated in open session. During floor debate, the bill can be amended or substituted. It can be held (circled).

In order for a bill to pass the House of Representatives, it must receive at least

12 | QSa lt L a k e | issue 1 46 | J a nua r y 21 , 2010

same-sex couples and its hostility towards non-biological parents, an individual in a gay or lesbian relationship still has custody over his or her biological children. This fact has allowed at least one male gay couple in Utah to avail themselves to a surrogate mother in their quest to have children.

Earlier this month, Rep. Christine Johnson, D-Salt Lake City, announced that she was carrying a child for two gay men, both of whom are friends of hers. The child was conceived with her eggs and one of the men’s sperm, thus granting that man legal rights to the child. Johnson has declined to name the couple and has thanked the state’s gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender community for not trying to uncover the couple’s identity.

Surrogacy has been legal in Utah since 2005, when the State Legislature approved the Uniform Parentage Act. Johnson said that she offered to be a surrogate mother when the couple told her they were interested in having children, given that adopting a child would be costly and highly unlikely if they remained in Utah. She became pregnant on the first attempt and is now five months into a healthy pregnancy.

Although Johnson said she has yet to meet any other surrogate mothers — particularly those in her unique circumstance — she has met several mothers who had considered carrying children for friends.

“It allows me to feel like less of an anomaly,” she said.

Although Johnson said she will remain in the child’s life after the birth as long as she and the couple are living close to each other, she stressed that the men’s names will appear on the child’s birth certificate, and that the child will be theirs for all intents and purposes.

“The first consideration is the fa-

38 votes. The bill must receive at least 15 votes in the Senate in order to pass.

The Bill Passes Both Houses in the Legislature. After the bill has gone through both houses, it is signed by both presiding officers (the Senate President and the Speaker of the House).

The Bill is Prepared for the Governor’s Action. The Office of Legislative Research and General Counsel prepares the bill in final form. This is called the “enrolled” bill.

The Bill Receives the Governor’s Action. The enrolled bill is sent to the Governor for his action. He can either sign the bill, veto it, or allow it become law without his signature.

The Bill Becomes Effective. A bill enacted by the Legislature is effective 60 days following adjournment, unless another date is specified in the bill.

Source: State of Utah

thers,” she said. “This is their child, their life and they get to determine my involvement.”

Although many Utah Legislators do not accept the idea of gay couples adopting children, Johnson said that she has received no negative feedback from her colleagues on Capitol Hill. “Even the individuals with whom I’ve gotten along the very least have come up and said, ‘How are you feeling?’” she said. “It’s been another opportunity to discuss our shared humanity, frankly. I’m sure there are people who are being silent respectfully, and I appreciate that. I’m not unaccustomed to criticism of my lifestyle or my choices or my sexual orientation, so I feel well-prepared to counter any negativity with, I think, just an open conversation about why I want to do this and why it is right for me.”

And Chavez-Houck hopes to see the day that her bill is passed, and the need for same-sex couples to result to things as uncertain as surrogacy to be a thing of the past. Although she has not designated her renewed adoption bill as one of her priority bills this session, she stressed that she has done so only to devote more time to defending the gay and transgender-inclusive housing and employment nondiscrimination ordinances Salt Lake City passed last November — ordinances which might well face a challenge from a Legislature uncertain about whether or not they will grant “special rights” to gay and transgender people.

“I want to make sure that nothing becomes a casualty of the efforts that have already been won,” she said of the ordinances. “But I want the community to understand I’m never going to abandon this effort. I will continue to try and educate my colleagues about gay parents and why they should be allowed to adopt and the challenges [they face] in regard to second parent adoptions.”

The stories that she regularly hears about the way Utah adoption law hurts same-sex couples, and other so-called non-traditional families who are caring for children, is all the reason she needs to keep fighting.

“The stories come out of the woodwork like crazy,” she said. “I get very frustrated when people define parenthood and love and family in a certain way. Every family has value.”

She encouraged such parents and family members to talk to their representatives and senators about these challenges.

“I get very frustrated when my colleagues say my constituents don’t want me to support this legislation and I know there are families throughout the state being affected by the current law,” she said. “They need to see our families, and the extended families of children, the aunts and uncles, grandparents and friends who love these families. That’s who they need to hear from because I think they’re using other constituents as cover.” Q

Make a Joyful Sound at the Legislative Session Unlike in years past, local gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender groups will not be kicking off this year’s General Legislative Session with a rally.

Rather, they will open it with an hour of music, inspirational messages and camaraderie in which legislators and the general public alike are invited to attend.

A Joyful Sound for Common Ground will be held in the Capitol Rotunda on Jan. 23 at 6 p.m. It will feature performances by the First Unitarian Church of Salt Lake City choir, a trio of jazz musicians who also call the church home, and the inimitable Sister Dottie S. Dixon, star of the KRCL Radio program bearing her name and the play The Passion of Sister Dottie S. Dixon.

Although the evening shares a name with the Common Ground Initiative, a legislative push by statewide gay and transgender rights group Equality Utah during last year’s session, the evening is not about politics, said Brandie Balken, the group’s executive director.

“It’s coming together to celebrate

our commonality, our community and the uniqueness that we share here in Utah,” she said. “It’s a display of respect and support for all residents within the community of Utah and their value.”

The evening is sponsored by the Utah Pride Center, Equality Utah, the First Unitarian Church of Salt Lake City, the Inclusion Center for Community and Justice, PFFLAG and the Utah Pride Interfaith Coalition, the latter of which has made the gathering its event for January. Members of the coalition — a group of gay and transgender-affirming churches, religious organizations and individuals — like chairperson Russ Gorringe have been involved in organizing a Joyful Sound for Common Ground from its earliest inception.

Gorringe said that the evening is a great opportunity for all Utahns to realize and celebrate the goals, needs and wants they share, rather than the politics that divide them.

“I really was excited when [Equality Utah] came up with the Common Ground concept over a year ago,” he

Testifying Before a Legislative Committee

Citizen participation in committee hearings impacts government policy. Legislative committees lie at the heart of Utah’s legislative process. Committee meetings are open to the public and provide a forum for citizens to express their views about proposed legislation, budgets, and other public policy issues.

Public testimony may influence the committee’s action. It also becomes part of the permanent record and may be used in future research.

Well-prepared public testimony before a legislative committee can be exciting and fulfilling.

Four Suggestions to Enhance Your Appearance before a Legislative Committee: 1. Know Your Audience.

The members of the committee are “citizen legislators.” In addition to their public service, they have full-time jobs. They are farmers, public employees, doctors, lawyers, homemakers, craftsmen, and a host of other occupations and professions. They are a cross section of Utah’s society. They are your neighbors and friends.

Be courteous.

Don’t accuse committee members of causing your particular problem.

Resist the temptation to scold, put down, or insult the decision-makers or other witnesses. This tactic will likely alienate them from your cause.

2. Know the Issue.

Support your personal opinions with clear, understandable facts.

Be knowledgeable of the “other side of the story.” You may be asked to discuss the differences.

Draw from your own knowledge and experience.

2010 Legislative Calendar

Russ Gorringe said. “When I talk to people, whether they’re gay or straight, about the things that really matter the most to them, I’m surprised at how much we really do have in common. We have more in common than we have differences and we need to celebrate what we have in common and build those things instead of running around in circles and banging our heads against the walls of what we do differently. Our hearts are the same.”

“It’s gonna be nice, it really is,” he said of the evening. Q

3. Be Familiar with the Committee Process Know the meeting time and location. Meeting times and locations are found on the meeting agenda.

Agendas are posted 24 hours in advance of the meeting on the third floor of the State Capitol building or they can be located at the legislative home page on the Internet, le.utah.gov.

Check to make sure the issue you are following has not been removed from the agenda.

Agenda items may not be heard in the order in which they appear.

Contact the staff policy analyst in advance of the meeting to request permission to testify and to be placed on the committee chair’s list of those wishing to speak.

If possible, attend a committee meeting before you testify to become familiar with the process and room layout.

4. Prepare Your Written Testimony and Oral Presentation Give copies of your testimony to the committee staff before you begin your presentation.

Begin your presentation by addressing the chairperson first, then members of the committee. “Chair ____, members of the committee ...”

For the record, state your name, address, and the organization or group you represent.

State your purpose for testifying. Do not read your testimony to the committee word for word. Prepare an outline.

Be prepared to summarize your testimony in one minute — that may be all the time you are allowed.

Thank the committee members and offer to answer any questions.

When a member asks you a question, respond: “Chair (last name) or Senator/Representative (last name), the answer to your question is ...”

Relax. The committee understands that this can be an intimidating experience — they don’t expect a perfect presentation.

Source: State of Utah

Dec. 1, 2009 Last day for governmental entities to request bills without floor approval Dec. 1, 2009 Last day for legislators to prioritize up to three bills Dec. 16 Last day for Executive Appropriations Committee to set initial budget matters January 25 First day of session February 3 Last day for the Legislature to either pass or defeat each base budget bill by noon February 4 Last day to request bills or appropriations without floor approval by noon February 4 Last day to approve bills for numbering without floor approval by noon February 26 Last day for legislators to prioritize fiscal note bills and identify other programs for new funding March 4 Last day for Executive Appropriations Committee to complete all decisions necessary to draft the final appropriations bill March 5 Any bond bill shall be made available to legislators by noon and final action must be taken by calendared closing time March 5 Last day to pass any bill with a fiscal note of $10,000 or more March 8 Last day for a motion to reconsider March 8 Last day to consider bills from own house March 9 General appropriations bills, supplemental appropriations bills, and school finance bills shall be available to legislators by calendared floor time and final action must be taken on each bill by calendared closing time March 10 The final appropriations bill shall be made available to legislators by calendared floor time and final action must be taken by noon Last day of session March 31 Last day governor may sign or veto bills May 10 Last day a veto-override session may begin May 11 Normal effective date for bills May 11 First day to file bills for the 2011 General Session

J a nua r y 21 , 2010 | issue 1 46 | QSa lt L a k e | 13

Views

Q on the Street

Utah anti-drunk-driver senator arrested for DUI; Cache Valley rep arrested for soliciting sex from a male cop; Senator resigns after it’s revealed he tried to buy off opponent ... what do you think the next great Utah legislative scandal will be?

Brian Kim Senator Buttars discovers the true meaning of pig sex.

Jesse Parent Body scan photos of Jason Chaffetz are “accidentally” posted online.

His response: “I just got out of the pool!”

Daniel Beecher

Something you read make you gleeful? Something piss you off?

QSaltLake welcomes letters from our readers. Send your letter of under 300 words to: letters@QSaltLake.com QSaltLake reserves the right to edit for length or libel or reject any letter.

1 4 | QSa lt L a k e | issue 1 46 | J a nua r y 21 , 2010

Coalition of 10 female Republican legislators from around the state admit that they would support gay marriage bill, if it also contained provisions legalizing marriage to cute sparkly vampires.

James Hicks Hey how about Sexually frustrated, Chris Buttars leaves wife for LaVar Christensen?

Paul Mero gets caught having sex at Larry Millers Megaplex with Gayle Ruzicka.

E-mails surface between all for regarding their planned escape to San Francisco for a sexual escapade to be held during Gay Pride Week?

Isaac Higham Carl Wimmer sues federal government for not covering his abortion made necessary by his love affair with Jason Chaffetz.

Blake Sarlo Utah Republicans accidentally pass law without first checking with LDS Church.

Queer Gnosis The Queer Child: Interview with Kathryn Stockton PART 2

I

by Troy WIlliams

N PART ONE OF OUR INTERVIEW ,

Kathryn Stockton introduced us to the “ghostly gay child,� a specter that haunts our childhood but can only be “birthed retroactively� in adulthood. In her new book, The Queer Child or Growing Sideways in the Twentieth Century, Stockton introduces the idea of “growing sideways� to describe patterns of growth that defy the familiar trajectory of “growing up.� Legal and social realities have historically denied children the possibility a gay future: “One can remember desperately feeling there was simply nowhere to grow.� Yet, the directions, delays and suspensions of childhood growth reveal a rich world of metaphors, lateral relations and queer fantasy.

The following segment is from our interview on KRCL’s RadioActive.

TROY WILLIAMS: An idea that leaped out from your book was the notion that the silences surrounding queer children are broken only through fictional forms.

KATHRYN BOND STOCKTON: One of the first moments of a public discourse surrounding the possibility of gay children in a present tense is a 2005 segment of the Oprah Winfrey show that was titled “When I Knew I Was a Gay.�

Oprah was trying to demonstrate that often children are gay to themselves before they come out to anyone else. So Oprah could be an interesting marker for the point where we began to have a public discourse of when kids are gay children in the present tense. Up to that point I feel fairly confidant saying that gay people have often talked and written about gay childhood, but aside from that, public legal discourse has not recognized that category. Interestingly enough, fiction, and highly canonical literary fictions have. I go back to Henry James as one of the first instances — a novella that James published in 1892 called The Pupil that might be the first instance of a ghostly gay child. By the time you get to 1928 with The Well of Loneliness, undeniably there you have the ghostly gay child of Stephen — a child who senses there is something “wrong� with her.

TW: Stephen is a girl.

KBS: Yes, as a 7-year-old girl. She has a crush on a twentysomething housemaid. Literature and film have been thinking about childhood in wonder-

fully complicated ways for quite a long time. This figure that I call the ghostly gay child we will look back and historically say was a figure alive in the 20th century. But not in the 21st century. We are starting to show signs of a movement believing that children may be gay to themselves.

TW: Take us through what you call a sideways growth.

KBS: Why is it that we always talk in terms of growing up? If you think about the metaphor of growth that has been most powerful in our culture, it’s one

Nobody is attracted to all women.

Nobody is attracted to all men. that has a vertical sense and linear sequence. So literally, you are growing up to full stature: to marriage, work, reproduction and having a family of your own. All of those things are taken as the most central signs of growing up.

But it seemed to me that this verticality was problematic in any number of ways. First of all, what does it mean for the lives of many people, gays, lesbians, and other straight folk who don’t reproduce? Does it mean then that they haven’t grown up if they haven’t reproduced themselves generationally? It was that upward trajectory that seemed problematic to me because it didn’t seem able to speak to all the other kinds of growth that many of us obviously know from our lives. It also seems to suggest that once you reach full stature, or have reproduced yourself, that growth has stopped for you.

Which is clearly not the case.

And it seems to me that cognitive science is very much aware of a lateral metaphor. Neural networks are about extension and lateral connections between and among ideas. This is one way that brain science thinks about

J a nua r y 21 , 2010 | issue 1 46 | QSa lt L a k e | 15

growth. We need to come back to ideas of growth that are about vigor, volume and lateral connection and extension.

Other ways of thinking about growing that are not just tied to [the] heteronormative notion of a growing up in a vertical, linear fashion.

TW: Or as you say, growing toward a question mark.

KBS: I could not imagine the pain and suffering of junior high or high school.

I really didn’t know what would become of me. I could not imagine a future unfolding for the form of attraction that I desired. In that sense, I really did feel myself growing sideways. I had no idea of what I could grow “up� to since I saw no version of growing up to that I could participate in. Very different for kids growing up now maybe, who think they might be gay. They may actually see possibilities for themselves that I did not.

TW: And this is relatively new.

KBS: It’s really why I had to decide the parameters of the book would be the 20th century. The ’90s saw tremendous change. Queer theory wasn’t really born until 1990. When you think of all the people that were still in the closet before the ’90s, Elton John and k.d. lang — Ellen doesn’t even come out on TV until 1997. So kids growing up

with many gay figures on TV and in the movies is a very recent phenomenon.

And this is changing the phenomenon of whatever it is kids think they are when they find themselves attracted to the so-called “same-sex.�

I want to come right back at this from a queer theorist’s perspective.

Part of what I’m saying is that what this seemingly gay child is having is a relationship with a word, often more than anything else. This is not necessarily a good or bad thing for children to take the word “gay� to themselves and solidify themselves under the term. This is not a book that in a sentimental way wants to embrace the idea of the gay child and argue for a series of rights (though I’m not against that).

The book really looks at the force of that ghostliness throughout the 20th century and the effects that may have.

This is a complicated idea of a child having a relationship with an idea of gayness that they are putting together from the culture around them, and to then layer on top of that whatever they perceive their queer attractions to be — cross-dressing, transgender or whatever. It could be any number of things for children. Q Podcast the entire interview at queergnosis. com.

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Creep of the Week Karl Rove

by D’Anne Witkowski

H

ow long does a marriage have

to last before it’s considered “traditional” to Karl Rove?

Well, three years if you’re talking about his first marriage. Twenty-four if you’re talking about his second.

Karl “ban gay marriage for political gain” Rove and his second wife have called it quits via the no-fault divorce laws of Texas.

I know, it’s hard to believe, isn’t it?

Not that Rove is a hypocrite when it comes to the “sanctity of marriage,” but that he was ever married at all. Who would do that to themselves? But as my dad used to say, “It takes all kinds.”

And as long as those “all kinds” are heterosexual, they’re allowed to get married. And unmarried. And then married again. Rinse and repeat.

Mind you, the majority of gays in this country can’t even get married once.

Rove is, in part, to blame for that. Re-

member that rash of anti-gay marriage ballot initiatives in 2004? Rove’s seal of approval was all over that. Had to get those Jesus loving gay-hating folks to the polls to vote for Bush, after all. So why not bait the trap with gay folks?

Rove is, of course, the man who argued

Rove is the man who argued that letting gays marry would be throwing away ‘5,000 years’ of tradition. that letting gays marry would be throwing away “5,000 years” of tradition.

As Dan Savage commented, “Traditional marriage is for life. Which means Karl ... shouldn’t have been allowed to get out of [his marriage] alive, right?”

Of course, I shouldn’t even be writing about Rove’s divorce, traditional or not. It’s disrespectful.

According to spokeswoman Dana Perino, “[Karl Rove and his wife, Darby] came to the decision mutually and

16 | QSa lt L a k e | issue 1 46 | J a nua r y 21 , 2010

amicably, and they maintain a close relationship and a strong friendship.

There will be no further comment, and the family requests that its privacy be respected.”

Of course, in order to respect someone’s privacy, you kinda have to respect them, and respect isn’t a word I associate with Karl Rove. “Revulsion,” is closer, tied with “resentment.”

Don’t get me wrong. I understand Rove wanting privacy at this time.

I mean, divorce is a sad and difficult thing. I hardly expect Rove to be holding press conferences or doing media junkets right now. But what I can’t do is respect his privacy. Because he has no respect for mine.

As Joel Mathis wrote Dec. 29 on his Philadelphia Weekly blog, “Rove made a concerted effort to push the marriage status of hundreds of thousands of Americans to the center stage of the political process. He treated the issue like a political plaything. Which is easier to do when it’s an abstract notion. Only problem is: For each one of those couples, it’s not at all an abstract issue.”

Indeed. And by using gays as a political football in order to get George W. Bush reelected, America was from what, exactly? What did America gain by denying so many gays and lesbians the right to marry – enshrining homophobia into state constitutions, no less? What, besides the shittiest president we’ve ever had who left messes we’re all going to be cleaning up for decades if not lifetimes to come?

Bush’s nickname for Rove, Turd Blossom, is more apt than he realizes. Q D’Anne Witkowski has been gay for pay since 2003. She’s a freelance writer and poet (believe it!). When she’s not taking on the creeps of the world she reviews rock and roll shows in Detroit with her twin sister and teaches writing at the University of Michigan.

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Snaps & Slaps SNAP: Peter Corroon for Governor With so many pundits giving incumbent Gary Herbert victory in the 2010 gubernatorial race by virtue of his being a Republican and, well, an incumbent, it’s refreshing and encouraging to see a prominent Salt Lake County Democrat run against him. It’s even more heartening when that Democrat is Salt Lake County Mayor Peter Corroon, who has not only done a relatively good job of managing his office for the last nine years, but who is also outspokenly supportive of the state’s gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender population — though we do hope he changes his stance on civil unions if or when he wins.

A candidate willing to support a disliked and misunderstood minority means it when he says that he wants to represent all Utahns. After listening to Herbert hem and haw about whether or not discrimination against queer folks is a good thing, we think it’s about time we had a governor who openly supported us again.

SLAP: Another Weird Session The 2010 General Legislative Session’s opening is just days away of this edition’s publication, and already it has the makings of being one that leaves many Utahns saying “huh?” The anti-gay blowhards at the Sutherland Institute have asked legislators to “strengthen” Salt Lake City’s pro-gay housing and workplace ordinances by allowing every Mormon to opt-out of them (a process we at QSaltLake like to call “gutting”). Sen. Chris Buttars, R-West Jordan, has gone silent after saying he would support extending those ordinances statewide (though perhaps this is a good thing). And five legislators are running pro-states’ rights resolutions.

Because one simply wasn’t enough.

Anyone want to place bets on how long Buttars will last before saying something ridiculous, or how long it will take his party to get him under control when he does?

Mountain Meadow Mascara Curl Up and Diet

S

o darlings, the

by Ruby Ridge

New Year’s diet has barely begun and I’m already feeling cranky (Editor’s note: Technically, Ruby, “cranky” is a baseline for you, so I think the word you’re looking for is “crankier”).

After a rather sedentary fall and winter, I have packed on a few pounds. So, I decided it was time to cowgirl up and shed a few. I’m not rushing into any drastic, life-altering, cleansing, purging Hollywood diet or anything. I’m just doing a few little lifestyle changes that should benefit my overall health, and keep me away from Obama’s Socialist Death Panels for a while (Oh I kid, I kid, so don’t fire up the flaming e-mails, you Stonewall Dems.).

Here’s my plan.

Step One: I have switched from Pop Tarts to Toaster Strudels. I know what you’re thinking, petals: What’s the difference between a Pop Tart and a Toaster Strudel?

Well, at first blush, it might not be obvious to the untrained eye because the calories and fat content are about the same. But with Toaster Strudels you have to go through the extra steps of opening up the little cream cheese icing doohickey and spreading the icing over the warm strudel, manually! That burns calories, petals, so in my world, that makes Toaster Strudels health food.

The second step in my New Year makeover involves getting a slimming haircut. I’ve decided to swap out my Blagojevich Bob with its full, round shape and sweeping bangs for a utilitarian, face-slimming mullet. For years I wondered why our retro lesbian sisters were so enamored with the short on the sides and long in the back mullet clip, but now I know, cherubs: It takes pounds off your face and makes your double chin look like a NASCAR spoiler. I’m feeling lighter and faster already!

To accentuate the face-lengthening effect of my haircut, I am tossing out all of my oversized big girl earrings (you know, my neon skoosh balls, the bunches

of plastic grapes and so on) for long, vertical chandelier styles that drape down the sides of my face. Unfortunately, I shopped until I was blue in the face and most places just had these cheesy Jennifer Lopez/Shakira/1970s Cher kind of things that just don’t work with my sturdy, rubenesque frame. Luckily, I found some wind chimes in the garden aisle of the dollar store, and they seem to work quite nicely. The two-foot long, shiny aluminum tubes highlight and frame my face. Plus, you can hear me coming, going, turning corners and backing up from blocks away. I not only look fabulous, but I should get an award for improving public safety as well.

The last thing on my new healthy regimen is exercise. This is a must to strengthen muscles, promote flexibility and tone, and improve cardiovascular fitness. So in a fit of New Year’s resolve, I removed my IKEA shower caddy and placed my beauty essentials on the floor of my shower. That way, no matter how hectic my schedule is, I have to bend down and stretch at least three times in one day. That’s once for my body wash, once for my shampoo, and then once for my conditioner.

I know; exhausting, right? I can already feel the burn by the time I have to pick up my coconut scented Suave conditioner, but my personal trainer says it should get easier as my muscles adapt and/or the bottles become emptier. I’m telling you, cupcakes, it may just be a placebo effect, but I swear I can feel the results already. Next week, I’m thinking of upping my reps by putting my loofah on the shower floor as well. Its crazy, pumpkins, but this fitness thing has just got me setting all sorts of goals.

So wish me luck!

Ciao, babies! Q

I’ve decided to swap out my Blagojevich Bob with its full, round shape and sweeping bangs for a utilitarian, face-slimming mullet.

You can see Ruby Ridge and the Matrons of Mayhem performing live, in all of their politically incorrect polyester glory every third Friday of the month at Third Friday Bingo (First Baptist Church, 777 S. 1300 East in SLC at 7 p.m.). In February they are raising funds for Intermountain Therapy Animals.

J a nua r y 21 , 2010 | issue 1 46 | QSa lt L a k e | 17

To benefit QCares Foundation, supporting Utah gay and lesbian nonprofit organizations

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Lambda Lore A Look Back

by Ben Williams

L

ooking back over the past

decade it’s hard to imagine a time when there was no Equality Utah, no sWerve, no Utah Stonewall Democrats, and no hate crimes legislation. At the start of 2000 only the University of Utah had an antidiscrimination ordinance in place. Old familiar haunts like The Sun, Axis and the Deerhunter were all gone. Stan Penfold had just been appointed executive director of the Utah AIDS Foundation

and Jackie Biskupski had just become Utah’s first openly gay legislator.

As a historian I believe only sociopaths never look back, so here are some special events to help us get a perspective of how far we have come since the Y2K scare that threatened to end civilization as we knew it.

January 2000: An independent committee including students and faculty at Weber State University raised more than $50,000 to create the Mat-

reader survey or go online: qsaltlake.com/survey

Who are you? What do you want to see in QSaltLake? Our inquiring minds want to know! Here is your chance to tell us what you really think of us. Get this back to us by Jan. 31 and you will be entered to win two free tickets on the BIG GAY FUN BUS to West Wendover, Nevada!

ABOUT YOU: GENDER IDENTITY  MALE  FEMALE  TRANSGENDER MALE  TRANSGENDER FEMALE  OTHER

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GET RID OF:  WHO’S YOUR DADDY  RUBY RIDGE  BULLSHATTUCK  JACIN TALES  GAY GEEKS  STRAIGHT LINE  PETUNIA PAP-SMEAR  CREEP OF THE WEEK  LAMBDA LORE  CROSSWORD  WORD PUZZLES  SUDOKU  COMICS  QUEER GNOSIS  DATING DIET  GAY AGENDA  RESTAURANT REVIEWS

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thew Shepard Scholarship Fund. Gail Ruzicka called the scholarship “absolutely inappropriate.” Two of the winners requested to remain anonymous.

“It’s a sad day when you can’t print your name in the paper for fear that someone’s going to hurt you,” said one of the winners of partial tuition, a 35-year-old WSU junior who lived in Ogden with her partner and 5-year-old daughter.

February 2000: Vermont offered registered partners benefits for gay and lesbian couples. Gay Mormon Stuart Mathis committed suicide on the steps of a Mormon Church in California to protest LDS involvement in Proposition 22, an anti-gay marriage initiative. On that note, in 1999 local activist Kathy Worthington initiated a campaign to get gay and gay-friendly Mormons to renounce their membership in the LDS Church in response to blatant anti-gay efforts by its hierarchy. Kathy Worthington died in 2007.

March 2000: The Division of Child and Family Services’ board of trustees voted in 1999 to ban adoptions of children in state care by homosexual couples or unmarried heterosexual couples. In 2000 the State Legislature created a law supporting the DCSF position which then-Utah Governor Mike Leavitt signed. Rep. Jackie Biskupski, D-Salt Lake City told lawmakers: “I am not all of those negative things you have been taught to believe about me. I am not less than human and therefore do not deserve to have my liberties taken away from me.”

April 2000: Salt Lake City Mayor Rocky Anderson, making good on a campaign promise, signed an executive order protecting gay and lesbian city workers from discrimination.

May 2000: Five years after the contentious debate over gay-lesbian-straight school clubs began in Utah, East High School students met in the PRISM Club, the state’s first school-sponsored club organized to discuss current events from a gay and lesbian perspective.

June 2000: The first gay rodeo held in Utah was organized by the Utah Gay Rodeo Association. Dean Walton, aka Auntie De’, who died in 2009, was chosen as Grand Marshal. Fund-raising coordinator Chad Keller, who died in 2007, stated the cost of the event was near $50,000.

When organizers called Utah stock owners to rent animals for the rodeo, all refused when they found out it was a gay-sponsored event. The U.S. Supreme Court’s 5-4 ruling upheld the Boy Scouts of America’s right to exclude gays from membership. A federal judge upheld a decision to dismiss a lawsuit that alleged Utah’s sodomy and fornication laws violated a constitutional right to privacy. In 2003, the U.S. Supreme Court decided all sodomy laws were in violation of the U.S. Constitution.

August 2000: Gay LDS historian Jay

Bell and Robert Rees held a forum at the Sunstone Symposium titled “Remembering the Gay Suicides, a Memorial Session to remember Stuart Mathis and DJ Thompson.” Jay Bell died in 2003.

September 2000: The Utah Court of Appeals rejected Ken Larsen’s claims that the city’s “no-cruising on State Street” ordinance violated his state and federal constitutional rights. Larsen, a Libertarian mayoral candidate, became one of the first drivers cited for violating Salt Lake City’s new cruising ordinance. In 1999 Ken Larsen, although he is not a homosexual, also applied for a gay marriage license that was denied, as a way of challenging the state’s gay-marriage ban.

October 2000: Students who tried to form two gay clubs at East High School dropped lawsuits against the Salt Lake City School District after learning the district would sanction two gay clubs at East High under a revised club policy.

Stephen Clark, the ACLU’s legal counsel said, “That certainly is a victory for gay students and their friends and supporters.” Mormon parents of gay children pleaded with LDS Church leaders to halt distribution of the pamphlets “To Young Men Only,” “To the One,” “Letter to a Friend” and “For the Strength of Youth,” saying that they say condemned their offspring as “latter-day lepers.”

David Hardy, a former Mormon bishop, said the language caused “parents to condemn and turn against their gay children, destroying real families, and drive our gay children to self-loathing, despair and suicide.”

November 2000: BYU performed the 1934, Lillian Hellman drama The Children’s Hour which brought to the LDSowned school’s stage Martha Dobie, “perhaps the first gay character who wasn’t an out-and-out stereotype.” The student playing the character said, “I don’t feel that she is actually a lesbian.”

The Provo-based software Novell Inc. stopped matching employee contributions to the Boy Scouts of America, citing the youth organization’s exclusion of homosexual scoutmasters as a violation of the company’s anti-discrimination policies.

December 2000: A petition to The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, signed “Mormon Advocates for Further Light and Knowledge” appeared as an ad in The Salt Lake Tribune. The document called upon LDS general authorities to repudiate the church’s overall position that “samesex attraction is an undesirable and unnatural emotion, which, when acted upon results in sinful, Satan-inspired behavior.” The petition’s author was Mac Madsen, a former Weber State University healthy lifestyles professor and men’s golf coach.

And that’s the way it was in the year 2000. Q

1 8 | QSa lt L a k e | issue 1 46 | J a nua r y 21 , 2010

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Sports You Don’t Have To Be an Athlete

by Brad Di Iorio

Many of us don’t have the time to participate in organized sports on an amateur level. With work schedules, dating and relationships, and dealing with what the new economy has brought us, just getting to the gym is a major commitment. SimplySocial is a new men’s group that combines socializing and dining with organized physical activities.

SimplySocial is the brainchild of Richard Matthews and Cesar Romero, both of whom volunteer at the Utah AIDS Foundation and they wanted to put together a new social group, modeled after the organization’s group The Village, a youth empowerment program that was founded by Jeremiah Hansen in 2007.

“The homosexual experience can be very isolating, especially for those just coming out,” said Matthews. “SimplySocial wants people to know that there is a group of amazing guys that meet every single week, do a lot of adventurous things and want to get to know new people.”

Matthews and Romero want to make it clear that the group is male homocentric, but straight, lesbian, and female friends of any age, orientation or gender identity are welcome. As a

home-grown project, there is no budget and no official organization, as Matthews and Romero plan the events with the suggestions and help of attending members. Facebook has been the main outlet to attract members, but word of mouth is also growing the group.

SimplySocial meets Wednesdays at 7 p.m. in the University of Utah’s International Student Lounge in the school’s Student Union Building for about an hour and then decides on a location for dinner. Begun in November of 2009, the group has grown from 15 people to over 35 people each week. Dinner locations have included Dee’s, Squatters, Red Robin, Gourmandise, The Bakery, Village Inn and the Desert Edge Brewery.

Anyone interested can attend the social hour, just the dinner, or both.

“The space was a good public space and we wanted to come to them, rather than they come to us,” said Romero, who added that many people attending said they see someone in the hallway or at a club who they know is gay, but they aren’t able to speak to that person in such settings.

“When I came out, I literally had no friend to turn to, no one to discuss my new lifestyle with, and no idea where to go to make friends,” said Matthews, 28, who was born and raised in Montpe-

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lier, Ida., and attended BYU. “Getting engaged was like staring down the barrel of a gun and it motivated me to live life as an honest man.”

Romero, 26, has been in Salt Lake City for seven years and came from San Francisco and West Hollywood, Calif. “My coming out process happened here,” said Romero, adding that his friends from home find it peculiar that it took him moving to Utah to come out. “I made friends here and came out completely.”

Matthews and Romero met through The Village in 2008 and both volunteer at UAF; Matthews ran Coffee Talk for a short stint and Romero helped Hansen with The Village and volunteers as a counselor for the HIV Prevention Program.

“I like to choose my friends, and SimplySocial gives people a non-threatening forum to find their friends,” said Romero. “The gift of gay friendship and who is your choice of gay friends can be very empowering.”

Along with dining and socializing, SimplySocial also includes physical activity. This Saturday, Jan. 23, SimplySocial is planning a ‘Tramp-o-Land Mega Fun Night,’ at Progressive Power Tumbling in Provo. Gym clothes are required and those attending should expect trampolines, rope swings and diving boards ending in a ‘pool’ of soft foam rubber cubes and rectangular blocks — especially made for body crashing.

SimplySocial is also planning a win-

ter camp out over the President’s Day Weekend. “We’ll be escaping winter by camping outdoors in the warmest place in the continental United States. Death Valley National Park is beautiful and has views unlike any other place on the earth,” said Matthews. “During our stay, which includes two nights, we’ll be doing several hikes averaging four or five miles a piece. The estimated cost at the moment is $39 a person, which includes the gas and the campground cost.”

Other plans include pool parties, ice skating, sledding and tubing, and water sliding.

“SimplySocial is dedicated to the development of friendship and brotherhood in the gay community,” said Matthews. “If we can focus on this one critical thing, then the other organizations can utilize this closely knit network to better accomplish their missions.”

Matthews and Romero say they don’t believe that they themselves are anything special — they just want to see gay men have fun and get comfortable with themselves and others. “I think one of the rewarding parts of this is to see a real shy, reluctant homo relax and make friends, while establishing himself socially,” said Matthews.

Check out SimplySocial on Facebook by typing both words into the search engine (don’t include a space), or e-mail richardamatthews@gmail.com for all details of upcoming events and to get added to the group. Q

22 | QSa lt L a k e | issue 1 46 | J a nua r y 21 , 2010

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Whether you are an original swing kid, a new rockabilly, or just a big fan of the fedora, grab your zoot suit and travel back with us to the ‘40s as Big Bad Voodoo Daddy takes you to the nights of big bands, rock and roll rhythms, and jump blues.

David Cho, Conductor

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J a nua r y 21 , 2010 | issue 1 46 | QSa lt L a k e | 23

Arts & Entertainment

Gay Agenda Queer as a BigBreasted Bunny

by Tony Hobday

The Seven Deadly Sins of Gay Men: 1) Black shoes/Brown belt; 2) Flip-phones; 3) Prince Alberts; 4) Garnier hair products; 5) Sex in socks; 6) Vaseline; and 7) Pet Seagulls. Damn, I’ve committed five of them, most recently number three! Two more to go and I’ll burn in hetero hell ... isn’t that called the Celestial Kingdom?

21

thursday — 28-year-old singer-songwriter Howie Day has finally released a new album after six years — that time being spent mostly in handcuffs — and he comes to Salt Lake to promote it. Day may be a bit of a hothead, but he’s got a hot head ... that dark, electroshock hairstyle, those pinchable cheeks and sapphire eyes. Oh lord, somebody Sound the Alarm, it’s hot in here!

8pm, The State Room, 638 S. State St. Tickets $20, 800-501-2885 or thestateroomslc. com.

22

CIRCLE CYCLE See Jan. 29

friday — I’m not all that familiar with the work of Eddie Sarfaty, but he’s buds with fellow funnyman Bob Smith, who is one of my favorite gay comedians, so he must be pretty damn good, right? Plus, he’s a sexy looking guy ... some features, like his

ears, are a bit primal, but sexy nonetheless — I probably shouldn’t have said that because he’ll probably think I’m picking on him and he don’t like that. Check out the comedy of Eddie Sarfaty, tonight!

9pm, Club Jam, 751 N. 300 West. Tickets $20, 800-838-3006 or brownpapertickets. com.

QQ Multi-talented drag artiste Lady Bunny is a successful comedienne, singer, songwriter, emcee, actress and DJ ... all accomplished in the most generous of wigs. She’s in Salt Lake tonight with a show full of bawdy humor, zany skits, Southern charm and X-rated pop song parodies. You’ll laugh you cotton tail off! OK, I’m a cheesecloth.

Time TBA, Gossip at Club Sound, 579 W. 200 South. Cover $3, call 801-671-1154 for VIP entrance.

23

saturday — It’s that time of month again to change your underwear Gene. Join Mr. Naté and Manhunt. com at this monthly bash. You don’t have to dance and drink and play pool and stand outside smoking in your skivvies at the Underwear Night, but Big Mama likes it more if you do ... and we’re all here on earth to please Big Mama!

9pm, Club Try-Angles, 251 W. 900 South.

For more info, 801-364-3203.

24

sunday — The RCGSE along with Kam Ellinton, Koko Coture and Angela Dominguez present the 28th annual Mr., Miss and Ms. Gay Utah Pageant.

The theme this year is A Night of High Fashion...Runway Under the Stars. For some silly reason, I feel I should go smoke a doobie on the hood of my Suzuki at the Salt Lake International Airport. Anyhoo, contestants may apply online at rcgse.org.

6pm, Keys on Main, 242 S. Main St. Cover $6, proceeds benefit the Court’s General Fund, rcgse.org.

26

tuesday — Having Our Say is the oral history of the centenarian sisters Sadie and Bessie Delany. As the story unfolds, witness the rise of middle-

2 4 | QSa lt L a k e | issue 1 46 | J a nua r y 21 , 2010

income African Americans facing prejudice and discrimination in the South during and after slavery. It is about ordinary people who make extraordinary achievements — for more than 100 years.

7:30pm, through Feb. 6, Grand Theatre, 1575 S. State St. Tickets $8–24, 801-9573322 or the-grand.org.

27

wednesday — Have you played the board game Seven Deadly Sins? It’s a hoot! I once had to lick ketchup off a girl’s navel, it wasn’t too bad ... I mean, ketchup’s salty so it wasn’t that far off the norm. Anyhoo, the segue being the art exhibition, Jamie Wyeth: Seven Deadly Sins, opens today. Inspired by openly gay artist Paul Cadmus’ series, Wyeth takes his own approach: In his work, the sins are acted out by seagulls. Hey, isn’t that our state bird? The blasphemy!

11am, through May 22, Salt Lake Art Center, 20 S. West Temple. Free, 801-328-4201 or slartcenter.org.

29

friday — Local singersongwriter Andy Livingston is described as “a boy and a piano who records with a band; eclectic, piano-driven indie-rock with intimate lyrics, unique song-

structures, inspired by the likes of Tori Amos, Enya and myriad other artists.” Join this sweet, humbled artist at his sophomore CD Release Concert tonight!

7pm, Club Jam, 751 N. 300 West. Suggested cover $5, andylivingstonmusic.com.

QQ With hula hoops, volleyballs, balloons and ping pong balls, you just can’t help but feel like a kid again (or maybe even Ma from Priscilla, Queen of the Desert). Ririe-Woodbury Dance Company presents CIRCLE CYCLE, which literally revolves around anything round. The constant interplay of dance, narration, music, images and costume changes makes this an attention-grabbing performance which will not be easily forgotten by children and adults alike.

7pm, through Saturday, Capitol Theatre, 50 W. 200 South. Tickets $30, 801-355-ARTS or arttix.org.

2

tuesday — Broadway Across America presents a production of the Tony award-winning musical, Avenue Q, featuring puppets. It’s the story of Princeton, a bright-eyed college grad who moves to New York City with big dreams and a tiny bank account. The only apartment he can afford is on Avenue Q, where every-

one’s looking for the same things he is: a decent job, a stable relationship and a “purpose” — and a warm hand up inside ’em!

Times vary, through Feb. 7, Capitol Theatre, 50 W. 200 South. Tickets $35–52.50, 801355-ARTS or arttix.org.

QQ For youth ages 16-19, Spy Hop Productions is offering a free documentary arts program, Documenting Communities: Queer Filmmaking.

Facilitated by the very talented and very sexy Frank Feldman (Vapid Lovelies), the three-month class focuses on nonfiction storytelling and trains LGBT teens on professional filmmaking, gear and techniques.

Students must apply online at spyhop.org.

4–6pm, Tuesdays & Fridays, through Apr. 30, Spy Hop Productions, 511 W. 200 South. Free, contact Frank Feldman at 801532-7500 for more info.

UPCOMING Events FEB. 23

MAR. 31

MAR. 31 APR. 5 APR. 25

Sarah Bettens, The State Room Brothers & Sister, SL Men’s Choir and Sister Dottie Dixon Michael Bublé, E Center Muse, E Center Ani DiFranco, Kingsbury Hall

Save the Date

April 16 Day of Silence ­ dayofsilence.org

January 21–31 Sundance Film Festival, Park City ­ sundance.org

May 8 HRC Utah Gala ­ utah.hrc.org June 4–6 Utah Pride ­ utahpride.org

February 4–7 Super SkiOut Utah Friends Weekend ­ August 7–8 skioututah.com Park City Arts February 12–14 Festival ­ QUAC Ski-N-Swim ­ kimballartcenter.org quacquac.org August 22 March 7 UAF’s Oscar Night America ­ utahaids.org

Utah Pride Center Golf Classic ­ utahpridecenter. org

March 13 Salt Lake Men’s Choir and Sister Dottie S. Dixon ­ saltlakemenschoir.org

September 18 sWerve’s Oktoberfest ­ swerveutah.com

March 20 sWerve’s St. Patty’s Day Party ­ swerveutah.com

September 28 Equality Utah Allies Dinner ­ equalityutah.org

April 10 Queer Prom ­ utahpridecenter. org

October 9 National Coming Out Day ­ utahpridecenter.org

Review WTC Delves into the Gay Con Man

by Tony Hobday

J

Guare’s inspiration for writing Six Degrees of Separation hit close to home when two dear friends fell victim to the beguilement of a young con man claiming to be the son of Sidney Portier. The con man’s stint playing to the hearts and billfolds of New York City’s uppercrust was short-lived, yet he became an urban legend of sorts among the Fifth Avenue elite. His antics, sexual improprieties and heightened intelligence prompted Guare’s long-running play, as well as a film adaptation. Wasatch Theatre Company makes a valiant effort to bring the multi-charactered drama about personal “inner necessity” into our heads and hearts.

Ouisa and Flan Kittredge (Mary Lee Anderton, JC Carter) are New York socialites; he, a particularly respected art dealer. They live a high life of privilege — fine restaurants, fine wines; all things “superfluous” in life. They speak with absurd condescension on virulent subjects like cultural and social apartheid over a carafe of dry martinis. They reared three disrespectful children, now college age, each of who hold animosity toward them. Son Woody (Spencer Belnap), lips sealed during one heated argument, finally erupts, spitting immaturity like a spoiled little boy in tantrum mode, over the fact that they had given away is favorite shirt.

One evening a wounded young man named Paul (Trevor Jerome) enters Ouisa and Flan’s apartment claiming to be a friend of their children, as well as the son of famed actor Sidney Portier. Initially they are shocked and cautious of the mysterious man, but do patch up his wound and give him a change of shirt. Eventually, they succumb to his charm, to his articulate knowledge in literature, art and fine cuisine. They become so enamored with Paul, they offer him a bed for the night and travel money for the morning.

Early the next dawn, the Kittredge’s encounter a foul-mouthed, halfnaked hustler (Jesse Perry) darting from Paul’s room; a late-night treat ohn

Paul had picked up using the money provided by the Kittredge’s. Disgusted, they demand Paul to leave.

In the events following that unusual night, the Kittredge’s learn Paul had also conned another high society couple, a distinguished doctor, a young and naive couple from Utah and finally, Trent Conway (David J. Bohnet), a classmate of each of their children — the one connection between all of them and Paul, their “six degrees of separation.”

Wasatch Theatre Company’s production is good, not great. Anderton and Carter as the Kittredge’s, though strong, lacked ... perhaps misinterpreted the desired emotion created by Guare — emotional segues, especially in Ouisa, feel hurried and therefore unnatural. Possibly it could be a shortcoming of director Jim Martin to keep the show under 90 minutes.

On the other hand Trevor Jerome gives a solid, thoughtful performance as the misguided Paul. And most importantly, the single scenes that involved Trent and Rick (also Jesse Perry) are unmistakenly the most moving moments of the play.

It’s true about “no small parts.” Bohnet’s portrayal of the smitten Trent is so believable, the fiery passion in his eyes so daunting, the scene

becomes chilling. And Perry’s emotional performance as a confused Mormon man from Utah, who falls for Paul’s advances, easily awakens heart-wrenching awe.

Performed in the Studio Theatre of the Rose Wagner Center, the audience is directed to general seating that has been shifted to encompass the simple set (includes a Kadinskystyle painted stage). This arrangement allows for audience members to ocassionally stare awkwardly at the back of the actors’ heads as their lines drift inaudibly into silence.

Also, without criticizing the costume designer Linda Eyring too much, as I’m sure budget constraints made costume decisions difficult, but the Kittredge’s are extremely wealthy, country club types with an eye for the extravagant — this was not apparent, almost annoyingly so, in their mis-matched wardrobe.

Also, though perhaps anal on my part, it’s difficult to belief an aging, high-falutin’ New York socialite of the early 1990s would have an ankle tattoo. Not super important to the credibility of the production, but bothered me nontheless. Q

Six Degrees of Separation plays Thurs.-Sat., through Jan 30, Studio Theatre, Rose Wagner Center, 138 W. Broadway. Tickets $15, 801355-ARTS or arttix.org.

J a nua r y 21 , 2010 | issue 1 46 | QSa lt L a k e | 25

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A&E Lady Bunny Hops to Salt Lake City Just in time for the Sundance Film Festival, Utah is being overrun by drag queens.

On Jan. 15 the ladies of San Franciscoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Trannyshack, formerly a night club of the same name, appeared at Gossip for a wild performance â&#x20AC;&#x201D; though one absent of many of the naughty antics that gained them fame in California.

One week later, the same club will play host to Lady Bunny, a comedienne, recording artist, actress and, of course, a drag queen famous for gigantic wigs that are one part 1950s beehive, and four parts camp.

Lady Bunny expressed surprise, and indeed mild outrage, that the Trannyshack drag queens had beaten her to Utahâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s stage, including founder Heklina. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Not that rotten bitch, Heklina!â&#x20AC;? she gasped while hacking through a mild head cold. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Oh, God, I was choking before, now Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m going to lose my lunch!â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;No, sheâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s one of my best friends,â&#x20AC;? she laughed. â&#x20AC;&#x153;But that doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t mean sheâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not a hateful hag! Thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s no one like Heklina. Thank God.â&#x20AC;?

There is also no one quite like Lady Bunny. The Chattanooga-born drag queen has been performing across the country since the 1980s when she got her start as a go-go dancer in Atlanta, Ga.â&#x20AC;&#x2122;s prominent night club, the Pyramid Club alongside no less than RuPaul, who was then her roommate. â&#x20AC;&#x153;She still owes me $10,â&#x20AC;? she quipped.

From her beginnings at the Pyramid Club, Lady Bunny went on to organize Wigstock, an outdoor drag festival that got its start in New York Cityâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s artsy East Village and which ran continuously until 2001, with a few encores throughout the rest of the decade.

Named after the iconic 1960s rock festival Woodstock, Wigstock was, in Lady Bunnyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s words, a â&#x20AC;&#x153;whoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s who of dragâ&#x20AC;? during its 21-year stint, and attracted not only prominent drag performers but recording artists as diverse as Boy George, house/club group Deee-lite and John Cameron Mitchell, the creator and original performer of German drag queen Hedwig from the smash hit stage musical Hedwig and the Angry Inch. â&#x20AC;&#x153;That ate up most of my youth,â&#x20AC;? Lady Bunny said of the festival, of which a documentary was made in 1995 (and in which she appeared). Aside from her iconic drag performances, Lady Bunny

currently acts: she has appeared in bit parts in the TV series Sex and the City and the cult drag film To Wong Foo Thanks for Everything, Julie Newmar and is currently in rehearsals for a play called When Joey Married Bobby, in which she plays a fairly â&#x20AC;&#x153;daffyâ&#x20AC;? wife of a Southern Baptist minister. She also writes a snarky, â&#x20AC;&#x153;worst of the week in celebrity outfitsâ&#x20AC;? column for Star Magazine.

Despite her travels, however, Lady Bunny has never been to Salt Lake City, though she has visited the Sundance Film Festival before. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m so excited to have the whole

Mormon Tabernacle Choir back me up!â&#x20AC;? she joked.

While, unfortunately, she will not appear onstage with anyone remotely connected to the prominent LDS choir, her show will nonetheless include a generous helping of music. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I do a lot of song parodies which are fairly dirty, and I like to incorporate new songs into those and will often sling a bunch of this together into a medley,â&#x20AC;? she said of her show. In between jokes, talking to the audience and singing, she also parodies an infamous dance routine from the 1960s comedy series Laugh In, in which the cast frolicked between jokes and skits. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s basically an excuse to go-go dance between one liners,â&#x20AC;? she explained.

Overall, she is curious to see what a â&#x20AC;&#x153;Salt Lake City gay bar audience is like.â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;Please come in drag and remember, wigs do keep your head warm!â&#x20AC;? she said.â&#x20AC;&#x201A; Q Lady Bunny will perform at Gossip, 579 W 200 South, on Jan. 22.

26â&#x20AC;&#x201A; |â&#x20AC;&#x201A; QSa lt L a k eâ&#x20AC;&#x201A; |â&#x20AC;&#x201A; issue 1 46â&#x20AC;&#x201A; |â&#x20AC;&#x201A; J a nua r y 21 , 2010

Food & Wine

Wine Reviews

Some Interesting Varietal Wines

â&#x20AC;&#x153;ANY THING BUT COMMONâ&#x20AC;?

Sampler Platter

by Chef Drew Ellsworth

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â&#x20AC;&#x2122;08 Picpoul de Pinet, Coteaux du Languedoc, Les Costieres de Pomerols

Open Mon-Sat 11:30amâ&#x20AC;&#x201C;2pm 5:30 â&#x20AC;&#x201C; 9:30pm Fri & Sat til 10:30pm 1394 South West Temple

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www.MeditrinaSLC.com

This is such a great little wine: floral, layered, similar to white Rhones. Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve served this with garlic/ herb cheese and home baked oatmeal bread.

Picpoul is normally a blending grape used in Rhone blends, but makes a surprisingly â&#x20AC;&#x153;newâ&#x20AC;? teasing single varietly wine: crisp clean and dry, but not too dry. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s great for Provencal cuisine. Price: around $12.

â&#x20AC;&#x2122;08 Michel Torino Don David Torrontes reserve, Argentina A white grape originally from Northern Spain that makes a beautiful and versatile wine which, to me, is similar to German/Alsatian wines (GewĂźrztraminer in particular) but not as bold and not as easily recognized. This Torrontes is particularly good in that it has enough acidity to serve with a simple salad made with a yogurt dressing. I just love it and it drinks like a much more expensive bottle. You need to try this one.

Price: around $16.

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â&#x20AC;&#x2122;05 Guigal Condrieu, La Doriane

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This was a bottle from my cellar that originally cost $100 but I purchased at a discounted price of $50. Once again, I am just a little disappointed in a wine by Guigal. I think this 100 percent Viognier is a little hot with alcohol and a little too strong for the potato/leek soup I had paired it with. In the past, Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve had other bottles of the Doriane and found them floral, nosey, mouthy and gorgeous. This one, though, is not so good.

â&#x20AC;&#x2122;08 MontGras Carmenere Reserve, Colchagua Valley, Chile

Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve wanted to try this wine for a very long time.

Carmenere â&#x20AC;&#x201D; pronounced â&#x20AC;&#x153;Carmenairâ&#x20AC;? not Carmenyair â&#x20AC;&#x201D; is becoming more and more popular and, like Malbec before it, Carmenere is doing really well in South America.

This wine is similar in body to a Merlot but, to me, much more complex and a bit spicy a la Zinfandel. It is a hit with good old American Pot Roast.

Price: around $12.

â&#x20AC;&#x2122;07 Cline Ancient Vine Carignane, Contra Costa County, Calif.

Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve known about this wine for years and always wanted to try it, too. Carignane â&#x20AC;&#x201D; pronounced â&#x20AC;&#x153;Careenyawnâ&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x201D; is soft and delicious. I think itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s similar to Pinot Noir, but fuller and with a bit of punch.

This Cline wine is beautifully made and so food friendly. This is a classic at around $16. (There are other Carignanes out right now that you might want to try.)

â&#x20AC;&#x2122;05 Earthquake Petite Sirah, Michael and David Phillips, Lodi

Bob Smith, the famous seismologist at the University of Utah, made this wine known to me. While Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m not always a fan of Petite Sirah, this one I really like. Petite Sirah is a fullbodied wine like Cab, so it will go with heavier foods like lamb, duck, etc. The Earthquake, however, is particularly mellow and balanced with a sort of blueberry glow. Coming off the Carignane, I really could experience the difference in essence between grape varietals. I recommend Earthquake as a pleasurable snack or picnic wine with cheeses and breads. I also find it quite Romantic. Price: $18

We love our Facebook friends facebook.com/qsaltlake

28 | QSa lt L a k e | issue 1 46 | J a nua r y 21 , 2010

COUPON

Dining Guide

Sapa Sushi Bar & Asian Grill A gateway to Asiaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s dining crossroads 722 S State St

ACME Burger Salt Lakeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s most imaginary burger joint, Sun. brunch.

275 S 200 West Salt Lake City 801-257-5700 Elevation Caffe Taking coffee and weenies to new heights 1337 S Main St Franckâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s American food with a French twist 6263 S Holladay Blvd 801-274-6264 J. Wongâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Asian Bistro Authentic Chinese & Thai cuisine 163 W 200 S, SLC 801-350-0888

Salt Lake City 801-363-7272 Squatterâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Pub Brewery Utahâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s favorite microbrewery,

Omarâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Rawtopia Restaurant Organic Live Food 2148 Highland Dr 801-486-0332 Red Iguana Best home-made moles and chile verdes in town 736 W North Temple, SLC 801-322-1489 Rice Fusion Cuisine and Sushi Bar 1158 S State St Salt Lake City 801-328-3888

2 for 1 Mon â&#x20AC;&#x201C; Wed 4pm â&#x20AC;&#x201C; 10pm

801.328.3888

801-363-2739 Takashi Contemporary Japanese dining 18 W Market St Salt Lake City The Metropolitan

30 E 300 South Salt Lake City 801-746-4444

Trolley Wing Company Wings and beer Trolley Square 801-538-0745 Vinto Pizzeria Best pizza on earth 418 E 200 S, SLC 801-539-9999 The Wild Grape Bistro Eat where the locals eat 481 E South Temple 801-746-5565

To get listed in this section, please call 801-649-6663 and ask for brad or email brad@qsaltlake.com

J a nua r y 21 , 2010 | issue 1 46 | QSa lt L a k e | 29

BEER, WINE, SAKE

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Off Trax Internet Café Coffee, Wifi and Pool 259 W 900 S 801-364-4307

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Q:

I have been going out with this new guy for about two weeks and lo and behold Valentineâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Day looms ahead. Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m kind of freaking out â&#x20AC;&#x201D; and not sure what to do â&#x20AC;&#x201D; if anything. Help!

A:

What do you do for Valentineâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Day when youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve only been dating for a short time? Many of my friends in the early stages of relationships have been vexed by this dilemma over the years.

You donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t want to let the holiday slip by unnoticed (as if that were possible in this culture), but you donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t want to do â&#x20AC;&#x153;too muchâ&#x20AC;? in case that shows youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re more invested than your new flame. On the other hand, maybe youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re just having fun and sex and thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s your end gameâ&#x20AC;&#x201D; and loveâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s got nothing to do with it.

First of all, stop the mind games. Ask yourself how you feel about your new beau. How would you like to express those sentiments? Then follow your intuition. Another option is to talk with him before the 14th and say something like, â&#x20AC;&#x153;I know weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve only been dating for a little while, but do you think we should celebrate Valentineâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Day?â&#x20AC;?

If youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re still not sure how to handle the big day, under-do it rather than over-do it. Buy or make a card and write something authentic, like: â&#x20AC;&#x153;Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m really glad weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re getting to know each other.â&#x20AC;? Or if youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re feeling that this is more of a sexual tryst, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re so hot!â&#x20AC;?

When all else fails, thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s the stalwart: â&#x20AC;&#x153;Happy Valentineâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Day.â&#x20AC;?

By the way, if you havenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t said, â&#x20AC;&#x153;I love youâ&#x20AC;? in real life yet, donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t sign your card, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Love, John.â&#x20AC;? Other options are: â&#x20AC;&#x153;XOâ&#x20AC;? (for hugs and kisses) or â&#x20AC;&#x153;Fondly,â&#x20AC;? or just your name if you canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t decide what suits your current emotional state.

How Do I Live with a Closet Case?

Q:

Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m very comfortable with my sexuality, but my partnerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not out to his family or colleagues. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s driving me crazy. How do we handle the tension?

A:

Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m wondering whether you mean the tension between the two of you, one out and one closeted, or the tension you feel in the presence of your partnerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s family, when you are being asked to lie about your relationship. They are probably somewhat entwined.

Your real issue is that your partner, for whatever reason, is not able to be honest with himself or his family. Perhaps itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s his fear of emotional rejection, the threat of financial or professional ruin, or concern that news of his homosexuality would be too much for his parents to accept. But the truth is that because heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s an adult with a partner, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s time to develop a coming out plan.

Life in the closet is difficult enough for the guy in the closet without spreading the burden around by asking others to lie (or cover up) for him.

You may want to suggest he contact PFLAG and/or find a therapist to discuss his coming out issuesâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;and offer to support him through the process. In the end, of course, the decision to come out remains a personal one. Either your partner will or he wonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t. And you will either stay with him or move on. If he does remain in the closet and you do stay together, by the way, you may find it easier to limit your visits to his family so as to forego the pretense of being a â&#x20AC;&#x153;friend.â&#x20AC;? Q

Steven Petrow is the author of â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;The Essential Book of Gay Manners & Etiquette.â&#x20AC;&#x2122; Find him on the web at gayandlesbianmanners.com

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Wonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t You Be Our Friend?

Find QSaltLake on Facebook at facebook.com/qsaltlake

An anagram is a word or phrase that can be made using the letters from another word or phrase.

Rearrange the letters below to answer: This local singer-songwriter plays Club Jam, Jan. 27?

SYN invital dong ____

__________ PUZZLE SOLUTIONS ARE ON PAGE 39

30â&#x20AC;&#x201A; |â&#x20AC;&#x201A; QSa lt L a k eâ&#x20AC;&#x201A; |â&#x20AC;&#x201A; issue 1 46â&#x20AC;&#x201A; |â&#x20AC;&#x201A; J a nua r y 21 , 2010

The Dating Diet The Princess and the Pee-Pee

by Anthony Paull

S

For people of all ages to hang out, play pool, get on the internet, play music

crew me once , shame on you .

not even having sex anymore. Well, at least, not naked.”

Afraid to inquire about what that means, I remain quiet as Drew comes up with a bright idea as we head into the mall, surrounded by a sea of frantic holiday shoppers. “I got it!” he announces.

“What do gays do best when presented with a problem?” Bored, I stall with a reply. “Decorate it!” he answers. “You know, make it pretty. That’s how we raise the market value of neighborhoods. We buy a horrid house, hollow it, honor it with enhancements, and reap the rewards.”

“I’m not following,” I admit.

“Well, maybe I can ... I don’t know ... manicure it,” he says, heading into Bath and Body Works, where he finds a bottle of mint exfoliating cleanser, moments after purchasing a grooming kit at JC Penny. Texting his boyfriend to check on his cats back home, he informs me, “I’ll just, you know, prune his pubes with scissors and soften his pee-pee veins with this cream.”

“WHAT?! Who wants a soft dick?”

“Well ...,” he begins.

“You’re being stupid. This is fucking stupid!” I state, losing patience.

“Stupid enough to be in your column?” he bites.

“Ugh! Don’t you get it?” I respond. “Everything in life can’t be perfect. Life is ugly!”

There, frozen in place, he torches me with his baby-blue eyes, deflated by a hit of reality. So to ease the pain, I remind him of beautiful things like the gifted scarf around his neck, and the ‘I love you’ texts from a doting boyfriend who cares for his cats. And in my boggled mind I wonder if this is where the conveniences of modern time have led us? Are we so cushioned by our pretty houses, the labels on our clothes, and our designer Starbucks coffee mugs that we can’t be bothered by the shadow of something less than ideal? So your boyfriend has an ‘ugly’ dick. So what? Enlighten me. When will we evolve to the point where we realize that we’re human, and not every trivial thing needs to be fixed? Lately, it seems we’ve begun taking cues from the media, inventing problems during life’s lulls or exacerbating small ones, leading us to a world where ugliness primarily comes from within.

“Fine! You’re right. You win. So what should I do? Should I still buy this?” Drew asks, clutching the exfoliating cream to his heart.

“Nah, you better save your money.”

“For what?” he replies, flustered.

And for once, I don’t sugarcoat the ugly truth, because I know it won’t help.

“Therapy.” Q J a nua r y 21 , 2010 | issue 1 46 | QSa lt L a k e | 3 1

Screw me twice, shame on me.

Screw me three times, we’re dating! Yes, isn’t it a wonder how fast we slip into relationships?

Sure, we take our sweet-ass time in so many other aspects of our convoluted lives — forever pondering the purchase of a phone, car, or house — but when it comes to acquiring a partner, a life commitment, why do we fall so fast for a beautiful face when we know the ugly truth: relationships are never perfect, and eventually, loved ones are destined to reveal a flaw, imaginary or not.

“But everything looked perfect on paper!” Drew drunkenly slurs, guzzling his third beer. Home from college for the holidays, he has his fancy, black Prada scarf coiling his neck like an anaconda — a gift from his rich, sugar-daddy boyfriend. “Well, perfect until I saw his peepee. For the love of God, it’s so gross!”

Yes, meet Drew. He’s um, well, special.

Yes, since he was a wee, little bitch, he’s earnestly portrayed the princess role, disturbed by even the slightest bit of an imperfection in each of his string of boyfriends. The problem is he finds the most trivial things to pick apart. For example, take his last boyfriend. Drew ended their relationship because of the poor chap’s table manners. “He brought his face to his spoon instead of his spoon to his face,” Drew attests. “You should see how he eats soup, with his nose to the bowl.

How could I live with that?”

“But you can’t keep sabotaging your relationships over stupid shit,” I argue, as we depart from the pub, in route to the mall for some holiday shopping.

Fanning his face with his scarf, Drew silences me with a slap on the arm as we greet mid-day traffic. Grid-locked between snowbirds and a semi-truck, he tells me, with a slight whimper, that his boyfriend’s penis looks like a bonsai tree. “You don’t understand. It’s like, all crooked, and the hair is bushy, like in clumps. And veins everywhere. Really hard veins. Like his shaft is made of bark.”

“How awful,” I callously reply, with an eye-roll. “How ever will you make it work?”

“Not funny,” he cries. Feverishly fanning his face, his baby-powder scented perfume filters throughout the car. “You need to help me. What should I do?”

“Turn out the lights and squeal when you feel it.”

“That’s not helping,” he says, far from amused. Meanwhile, text upon text, his iPhone is lighting up with ‘I love you’ from his boyfriend. “It’s serious. We’re

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Q Fitness The Whole Story on Cholesterol

by Laimis

Y

ou’ ve heard a lot about how

high LDL cholesterol causes heart disease, but that’s not the whole story. So get the facts on the causes of heart disease and how you can help prevent it.

Cholesterol is bad for your health and high blood cholesterol levels accelerate heart disease. But these days, we spend so much time talking about cholesterol that many of us don’t realize it’s not the only cause of heart disease. You need to know about much more than cholesterol to fully protect your heart’s health.

Most heart disease is caused by a condition called atherosclerosis. It’s a big word that comes from Greek: “athero” means paste and “sclerosis” means hardness. Atherosclerosis is a slowly progressive chronic disease that changes your normally elastic, muscular and smooth blood vessels into thickened, hard and narrow vessels that put your blood flow at risk. When healthy blood vessel walls are damaged, the body tries to repair the damaged area with a scartype tissue that contains cholesterol.

Additional cholesterol enters the blood stream, leading to high cholesterol lev-

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els in your blood.

Once someone is diagnosed with high cholesterol, their physician often prescribes a cholesterol-lowering statin drug. Statins have been shown to lower the risk of heart disease and deaths related to heart conditions, and you should always take these medicines as prescribed by your doctor. But it’s also important to remember that cholesterol-lowering drugs aren’t the only ingredient for lower cholesterol.

There are at least 15 risk factors for heart disease. These include smoking, being overweight, eating a diet high in saturated fats, leading a sedentary lifestyle and hereditary factors. Reducing these risk factors will also help lower your risk of atherosclerosis.

Finally, it’s important to understand that there’s more to cholesterol than just your total, HDL and LDL cholesterol measurements. LDL is the “bad” cholesterol that can clog the arteries, and HDL is the “good” cholesterol that carries the LDL cholesterol out of your blood. Most doctors test for cholesterol using a simple blood test that measures for LDL cholesterol, HDL cholesterol and total cholesterol along with triglycerides (a type of fat found in your blood) and VLDL (very low-density proteins, similar to LDL). This test is informative and inexpensive, but it can sometimes miss things.

Other cholesterol tests are available, and while they’re a little more expen-

sive they can provide greater detail about your cholesterol levels. If you’re interested in finding out more about the types of cholesterol in your body, ask your doctor if this more detailed blood test might be right for you.

Eating a healthy diet can help you lower your cholesterol and maintain healthy cholesterol levels. Follow these healthy-eating tips to reach your hearthealth goals.

Research shows that almost half of North American adults over the age of 20 have high cholesterol. It has also been shown that the simple act of eating a healthy diet can help you lower your cholesterol and maintain healthy cholesterol levels. These healthy-eating tips will help you reach your hearthealth goals.

Eat Cholesterol-Cutting Foods

consider taking a high-quality fish oil supplement containing one to three grams of omega-3 fatty acids.

Get some garlic: Garlic may help reduce total and LDL cholesterol. If you’re not up for eating one to two cloves daily, consider a garlic supplement containing allicin, garlic’s active compound.

Sip green tea: Green tea has been shown to lower total cholesterol and LDL cholesterol while raising your “good” HDL cholesterol. But much of this research is based on the amount of tea consumed in Asian countries — that is, three cups a day. If you don’t drink a lot of green tea, a supplement containing green tea extracts and its active compounds — theaflavins and catechins — may help.

Heart Healthy Alternatives

Certain foods can contribute to high Eat oats: Research suggests the soluble cholesterol if eaten on a regular basis. fiber (beta glucan) found in oats may While forbidding foods is never a good help reduce both total cholesterol and idea, a successful strategy is finding the “bad” LDL cholesterol. If you’re not healthier alternatives to most of these a fan of oatmeal, try oat cereal or an oat cholesterol-promoting foods. Check bran muffin. the purple inset for my recopmmendaSprinkle some flaxseeds: Flaxseeds tions. contain lignan and soluble fiber, which may help Instead of This …

Choose This … block the formation of LDL cho2% or whole milk 1% or fat-free milk lesterol and help Yellow cheese Low-fat mozzarella cheese your body get rid Whole eggs Two egg whites with one yolk or egg of cholesterol. substitute Flaxseeds’ mildly Beef or dark meat White meat chicken or turkey nutty flavor is a ;WY^ IkZeak fkppb[ ^Wi W kd_gk[ iebkj_ed m^_Y^ YWd X[ h[WY^[Z complement to Fried foods Baked, broiled or steamed foods Each Sudoku puzzle has a unique solution which can be reached be]_YWbbo m_j^ekj ]k[ii_d]$ ;dj[h Z_]_ji ' j^hek]^ / _dje j^[ logically without guessing. Enter digits 1 through 9 into the blank salads, cereal, Regular mayonnaise Canola oil or olive oil-based mayonnaise XbWda ifWY[i$ ;l[ho hem ckij YedjW_d ed[ e\ [WY^ Z_]_j" Wi ckij spaces. Every row must contain one of each digit, as must each yogurt and homeButter or margarine Olive oil-based “margarine” spread [WY^ Yebkcd WdZ [WY^ )n) igkWh[$ GZeak _i WYjkWbbo \_l[ column and each 3x3 square. Qdoku is actually five seperate, made breads or (such as Olivio) i[fWhWj[" Xkj Yedd[Yj[Z" IkZeak fkppb[i$ but connected, Sudoku puzzles. muffins.

Sour cream Low-fat or fat-free sour cream Snack on nuts: Cream cheese Low-fat or fat-free cream cheese, natural Nuts are high peanut butter or almond butter in heart-healthy monounsaturated Chips, crackers, cookies Whole grain snacks that are low-fat and fats, which may trans-fat free such as whole grain crackers, help lower LDL trans-fat free meal replacement or snack cholesterol. Albars monds, walnuts, Fried fish Baked or broiled salmon, lake trout, and cashews are mackerel and albacore tuna rich sources of monounsaturated fats and can be eaten as snacks, Gradual Changes Win the Race sprinkled on salads, and added to your Don’t change your entire diet overoatmeal, cereal or yogurt. night. Make one dietary change at a Sneak in some soy: Many people time and move forward gradually. think soy is only for serious vegetari- Changes are more likely to become perans, but it’s actually an excellent source manent if they’re done at a slow, comof complete protein for everyone. Soy fortable pace. Just don’t lose focus. The also contains healthful compounds that more heart-healthy lifestyle changes may help reduce total cholesterol and you make, the greater positive impact it LDL cholesterol. Try making a fruit will have on your cholesterol and your smoothie with frozen fruit, vanilla soy overall health. milk, and a soy-based protein powder; also try snacking on soy nuts or sneak- For more information about fitness and nutrition please visit my page laimisenergy.com. ing tofu into soups, chili or lasagna.

Focus on fish: The American Heart You can also find me at King Studio, 1400 Association recommends eating fatty Foothill Dr. (above Stein Mart) or reach me at fish — such as salmon, albacore tuna, 801-815-7725 or laimis@laimisenergy.com. mackerel, lake trout, herring and sar- Buy a gift certificate for yourself, your family dines — at least twice a week to pro- or your friends in January and save $300 on mote heart health. If you don’t like fish, your personal training sessions.

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Heart Healthy Alternatives

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32 | QSa lt L a k e | issue 1 46 | J a nua r y 21 , 2010

CLUB E TO MEMBERS E R F S E G E IL HAS ITS PRIV MEMBERSHIP

N 23 A J Y A D R U T A S

T H G I N R A E W R E D N U

s t h g i n r e k o Thursdwaityh Cphihuahua & Mark

Fun & Prizes SUNDAY FEB 7

L W O B R E P SU PARTY esday? u t s e id s e b y a d r Gay on any othe noon for Gay Lounge r Come in any afte After the bar, VFT JO U O P D

Z U S B Q

F UI OFYU EPPS BU X T t PGGUSBYTMD DPN 1 DRAFTS $ S Y A D S E U T S WEENIES U YS POKER NIGHT Y A D N O M U SDA CE ALL NIGHT RAFTS R N D U A 1 H $ -D E T S C U Y N A A S T D -D N E N E SU OOL TOURNAM RAFTS U SATURDAYS DANC P S arly! e Y A e D iv S r E r N A .

D ll 1 WED u $ f , en we are h J BOY TOY/DJ D w D s t S h Y ig A n ID y R a d OPEN DAILY AT 2PM F r U atu S & y a id r F n o 251 W 900 S 801-364-3203 lines E BAR Avoid the long OUR SCREENS THROUGHOUT TH 1/2 BLOCK FROM 9th S TRAX STATION ON WWW.CLUBTRY-ANGLES.COM A PRIVATE

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U

U

Q Puzzle

Better Than Sex Across 1 Went down on with gusto 6 Counterfeiters’ nemesis 10 Moves the head 14 Whale finder 15 Gore Vidal’s At ___ 16 Role for Ron Howard 17 Start of a quip about why 47-Across is better than sex 20 Silly goose 21 Big beer buy 22 Lubricated 23 More of the quip 26 1985 Kelly McGillis movie 29 Cartoon prince’s son 30 Durango day 33 Mistake by Glenn Burke 34 Making a nothingbut-net sound 36 Reposed 37 More of the quip 39 Hathaway of Brokeback Mountain 40 Workplace for Michelangelo 42 Get in shape 43 Part of a giggle 44 “___ was saying” 45 “Queer,” before the Fab Five

47 It can be better than sex 49 My Own Private ___ 52 Paycheck abbr.

53 Aladdin’s monkey 56 End of the quip 60 It’s sold in bars 61 The life of Riley 62 JFK and LBJ 63 Easy partner 64 Parting words 65 Fruit drink Down 1 Nick was his master 2 Pulls behind 3 Grandson of Adam 4 Motor City org.

5 Emily of CSI: Miami 6 Main argument 7 Impressionist Claude 8 HBO alternative 9 Three R’s org.

10 Like a superbly pitched game 11 Lesbian character in She’s Gotta Have It 12 Emulate Greg Louganis 13 Watermelon “ammo” 18 Animal mouths 19 Sentence subjects, often 23 Hole ___ (ace to Sheehan) 24 Goldie of The Banger Sisters 25 Pg. in a photocopier

26 Like the Ladies of Llangollen 27 About to blow 28 Cock-and-bull story 30 Shore of Palm Springs 31 Lint trap?

32 Cut recipient 34 What Tim might call Tyne 35 Novelist Bret 37 Kiss from Kahlo 38 Rocker Clapton 41 Lake site of gay and lesbian ski week 42 Many of its seamen went to the bottom 45 Says “Li’l Abner,” say 46 How quickly one comes 47 Sevigny of Boys Don’t Cry 48 Beneficial 49 Click it to go to AfterEllen.com 50 Limp watch painter 51 Mapa of Desperate Housewives 53 Surrounded by 54 ___ noire 55 Cold War rival of the USA 57 Young lady coming out 58 “A drop of golden sun” 59 Singer DiFranco answers on p. 39

Cryptogram

A cryptogram is a puzzle where one letter in the puzzle is substituted with another. For example: ECOLVGNCYXW YCR EQYIIRZNBZN YZU PSZ! Has the solution: CRYPTOGRAMS ARE CHALLENGING AND FUN! In the above example Es are all replaced by Cs. The puzzle is solved by recognizing letter patterns in words and successively substituting letters until the solution is reached.

This week’s hint: W = O Theme: Testimonial from Paul Katami during the trial to overturn California’s Prop 8.

Hbjvd dgs mwbuv’z ygtb yb gvs ibuu wn gv Gybfjqgv.

_____ ___ _____’_ ____ __ ___ ____ __ __ ________.

3 4 | QSa lt L a k e | issue 1 46 | J a nua r y 21 , 2010

Q Nightlife W E E K LY B A R E V E N T S

SU N DAYS

MO N DAYS

T U E SDAYS

W E D N E SDAYS

T H U R SDAYS

F R IDAYS

SAT U R DAYS

CLUB TRY-ANGLES

$1 Drafts $1 drafts, 251 W. 900 South • D M N Beer-Soaked Beer-soaked $1 drafts Pool Poker DJ D / DJ BoyToy 801-364-3203 • clubtry-angles.com Weenies weenies Tournaments Night GOSSIP @ SOUND 579 W. 200 South • D M T X Dance!

801-328-0255 • myspace.com/gossipslc

$1 drafts Superstar Acoustic Fix at Jam JAM 751 N. 300 W • D M N & Dogs Karaoke Live DJ:K 801-891-1162 • jamslc.com Live@Jam with Brian G DJ Mike BabbitT Free pool Texas Hold Em Karaoke 8pm 80s Rocks!

Sassy Kitty’s Poles, Cages, PAPER MOON 3737 S State St • D K L all day $4 Paper $3 Red Stripe Free pool Karaoke 9pm Sexy Women 801-713-0678 • thepapermoon.info $1 Drafts Moon Steins $3 Coronas $2 Wells $3 Cans $1 Drafts Best Female DJs

The PÜRE 235 N 500 W • D M T X Evolution of 801-703-8469 • myspace.com/puresaltlake

Gay Fridays Blues Blues Jam Texas Porch Pounders Live Tango Speakeasy 63 W 100 South • M & Jazz Hold-em w/Bad Brad Music Practice 801-521-7000 Jam Wheeler/krcl 7–9p $1 drafts $1 drafts $1 drafts Dueling Dueling TAVERNACLE 201 E. 300 South • K X Karaoke Oldies Karaoke Dueling pianos pianos pianos 9p 801-519-8800 • tavernacle.com 9p Night 9p 9p 9p Karaoke Hot new THE TRAPP 102 S 600 West • B N D K M w/Kenneth DJ Wayne 801-531-8727

9pm Outdoor patio

Out Musician Holds CD Release Party Local openly gay singer-songwriter Andy Livingston had reluctantly agreed to take piano lessons as a child, but it wasn’t until he discovered the likes of Tori Amos, Elton John, Billy Joel, The Moody Blues and Enya that “I knew I had had enough of dead composers.”

He started writing mostly instrumental and orchestral pieces his junior year of high school. But it wasn’t until his second year of college when he joined up with a group of friends in Provo to form a local band that the lyrical songs started coming from all over. The band didn’t last long though, so Livingston decided to go after a solo career. And in 2007 he released his first full-length project Waltz.

Now, approximately two years later, his sophomore CD, Indigo, is out. The album “embodies my personal story of marrying spirituality and sexuality and of challenging traditional definitions of what it means to be a male; yes, I am a masculinist.”

From the playful cabaret-stylings of “Good Old What’s His Name” to the lyrically haunting “Indigo Winter” and “Strangers Who Double As Lovers,” the songs “come from deeply personal places, and it shows when I perform them.”

Join this young up-and-comer at the Indigo CD Release Party at Club Jam, Jan. 29, located at 751 N. 300 West. A $5 suggested donation will be taken at the door and the performance begins at 7:30 p.m. To learn more about Andy Livingston, visit andylivingstonmusic.com.

Dance, Dance, Dance!

Thump at Jam DJ Tidy Indie, Top 40 Women, Women, Women!

Live Music Dueling pianos 9p Hot new DJ Wayne Outdoor patio

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s omen’ W e emierYears r P s ’ Lakoer Over 15 t l a S lub f C

Friday Jan 29th

RCGSE Show Hosted by: Paris

Friday Feb 5th

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SUPER BOWL PARTY!

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J a nua r y 21 , 2010 | issue 1 46 | QSa lt L a k e | 35

Sunday:3pm-8pm (Extended Hours for Special Events) Monday: 6pm-1am Tuesday –Friday: 3pm-1am Saturday: 6pm-1am

NEW LINEUP 7 SUNDAYS 7

Free Pool, $1 Drafts, No Cover All Night

a MONDAYS ` Texas Hold Em! $4 PM Steins

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l WEDNESDAYS l 80’s Rocks! Free Pool. $2 Wells & $3 Big Bud Cans

7 THURSDAYS 7 Sassy Kitty’s Karaoke @ 9pm $1 Drafts

a FRIDAYS a

Poles..Cages..Sexy Women, Best D@%# DJs Spinning All Night

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Women Women Women Hot DJs Making You Sweat! No Cover til 9pm

Q Nightlife

Why Mike E Likes It Weekly Throw Down

by Mike E. Ellis

H

ere we are, after the holidays

and back to normal working life again. It is amazing to think that another year has come and gone, and we are already seeing Valentine’s Day décor in the local supermarkets.

Our nightlife has been a buzz, with new clubs opening and the older bars holding strong. Since I tend to write about the weekends a lot, I thought I would switch things up a little in this article and discuss what happens during the week. So for those of you who enjoy going out on weekdays, this article is for you!

To my knowledge, not much goes down on Monday nights. Perhaps that’s because we are all still recovering from the weekend, or we’re getting back into the groove of the week. Either way, Monday nights are definitely the

perfect evenings to sit at home and recharge our battery packs.

By the time Tuesday rolls around, we are feeling the work pressure, dreading getting up at ungodly hours of the morning and screaming at the morning commute. So when the clock strikes five, we are all in need of a drink and a place to wind down. Luckily, QLounge is now open for business! This wonderful, swanky event takes place every other Tuesday evening at varioius places around town. It is the perfect place to de-stress after a long work day. You can bask in the enjoyable tunes, sink into a delectable martini, and nibble on some pretty delicious food while you rub shoulders with some of gay professionals in the valley. I have been to this event and trust me, it is certainly the most excellent way to unwind after a long day of pushing papers.

3 6 | QSa lt L a k e | issue 1 46 | J a nua r y 21 , 2010

So now it’s hump day, and you’re halfway to the weekend. Jam has put together one of the best karaoke nights in town, and it all happens on Wednesday night. The always hot Brian Gordon will emcee your way through each lovely ballad, and as an added bonus, he will get up and sing a few upbeat songs himself. And who doesn’t love that? Jam takes the party one step further by offering a place to watch your favorite TV shows before singing the night away. And appropriately for karaoke night, the two featured shows are Glee and American Idol. So after you are done watching the stars sing their hearts out, you too can join in on the fun. If you have never experienced a night of Jam karaoke, be sure to stop in and see what you’re missing. With steamy songs, a hot emcee and a friendly bar staff, you are always guaranteed

an amazing night.

Jam continues the week with dollar drafts on Thursday nights. Tasty beer at a cheap price, what’s not to love, right?!

And don’t worry, if you aren’t feeling either of these joints. Try-angles is open everyday and is definitely a superb place to hang out during the week. The drinks are top-notch, the service excellent, and with pool tables, dart boards, and a juke box where you control the music, it is a certain recipe for fun.

The next few weeks are going to be amazing, so stay tuned for the lowdown on Sundance, Pure, Babylon and possibly even a Pride tip or two! The nightlife in SL,UT just keeps getting better and better, so don’t let an early day or the cold weather keep you in, stop in and heat things up! Q

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J a nua r y 21 , 2010 | issue 1 46 | QSa lt L a k e | 3 7

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Q Tales

The Climacteric As Miracles Go

These businesses brought you this issue of QSaltLake.

Make sure to thank them with your patronage.

By A.E. Storm

A

verage life expectancy for

american males is approximately 76 years old; although the statistics are all over the map, ranging from 74.1 to 78.3, factoring in such things as health and lifestyle. In relation to the homosexual lifestyle, gay American men initially expect their life to last no longer than about the age of 30, or so they hope because 30 is the new 90.

Well, that’s my theory, anyway.

My name is Tommy Wylie. I’m a homosexual American male. I recently turned 40 years old, reaching over half my statistical life expectancy of 76, and obliterating my own once-perceived life expectancy of 30 years old.

“I’ll be lucky if I see the age of 30,” I told my friend, Marie, at our high school graduation ceremony.

I believed it at the time not because I was some dirty whore destined to contract a terminal disease or because I was the unfortunate victim of a hate crime, but more because like most young gay men, I aimed to be as good-looking and wanton in death as in my youthful life.

“He’s so striking and beautiful, it’s such a shame,” friends and family members would comment at the wake.

Now that I’ve outlived my own onceperceived mortality by a decade, I’ve decided to be cremated at death — absolutely no wake will be scheduled.

“Damn, they sure caked on the makeup, didn’t they?”

I was conceived, rather unexpectly, in the late 1960s — my parents’ second offspring. “There’s absolutely no way you’ll have another child,” the physcian told my parents after my brother’s birth, a year and 10 months earlier. I wasn’t a

Puzzle Solutions

mistake, per se, as my parents were on an adoption waiting-list. They wanted another child, and apprently they were horny. I guess I was a miracle baby, in a way.

As miracles go though, I was lacking that certain divinity, that untarnishable glow surrounding my being like that of a silkscreened baby Jesus. I was constantly ill in infancy, unable to hold down

I likely could have been the youngest Guiness World Record holder for bouts of projectile vomiting most any type of nourishment — I likely could have been the youngest Guiness World Record holder for bouts of projectile vomiting. When I was 7, my dad had rushed me to the the hospital, balled up in excruciating pain, in his blaze-orange International Scout, where I was diagnosed with extreme constipation — another possible category winner in the Guiness book: The Youngest Person

Cryptogram: Being gay doesn’t make me any less of an American.

Anagram: Andy Livingston

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January 21

with an Elderly Affliction. A year later, my brother accidentally shot me in the forehead with a low-velocity, plastic-pellet BB gun while we were deer-hunting.

He nicknamed me Bullseye.

Then when I was 10, I was run down by a bicyclist while walking home from Sunday school. I’m not certain that’s why my family stopped attending church, but at the time it seemed a just reason to me.

My father moved us from El Paso, Texas (The Land of Fire-Ants) to Salt Lake City, Utah (The Land of Holy Garments), when I was 11 years old, with a newly reestablished lack of divinity.

“When people in Utah ask you if you’re a Mormon, tell them you’re a Texan,” my father instructed me and my brother.

I’ve lived in Utah mostly ever since, less the two short-term relocations to Seattle and Farmington, New Mexico.

The first, Farmington (which wasn’t thoroughly thought out, as the town is apparently a dumping ground for registered sex offenders), was supposed to be a journey of self discovery. Sufficed to say I discovered I was freaked out and ran screaming all the way back to Utah.

The second, Seattle, was an awkward attempt to lead a “normal” life with a girl that lasted only three months. The experience was so traumatizing — we had sex — I came out of the closet at 23.

My coming-out party — an event I choose to remember as a sophisticated Texas-themed Cotillion — began with me blubbering incoherently to my mother, “I’m gay!” and speeding off to The Deerhunter, the only gay bar I knew about at the time. I was fawned over the entire evening, gifted with handfuls of “free-beer” tokens, usually handed to me with a conspicuous palm-tickling. It was so damn romantic.

By last call my sexual inhibition was as far north of my southern region as Greenland is to the Equator, and so I rendezvoused to the wooded area of Memory Grove with Daniel, a strikingly handsome man with a tight swimmer’s body, and his “best friend” (I can remember neither his name or his features). It was my first threesome, of sorts, if you count hanging back nervously gawking at “best friends” undress, fondle and relieve each other.

That experience, inadvertently I believe, has lead most of my sexual encounters to occur outdoors, in public, or at the very least, in the backseat of a car.

OK, maybe I am a dirty whore! But still a miracle.

I’ve turned 40 years old, against all odds. Yes, the dramatic is one of my strong suits. According to the statistics, I have approximately 35.7999 years left to live — a feat, if you evaluate my history, will either be a miracle in itself or filled with many miraculous moments.

Obviously, I’m leaning toward the latter. Q 2010 | issue 1 46 | QSa lt L a k e | 39

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