December 2020 Recovery Newsletter

3rd Street Beat

Our 2nd year of publication begins NOW!

Produced by Clients of The Recovery Center 8 east 3rd Street 10003 #13 December 2020

The 3rd Street Beat Mission Statement The Third Street Beat is a newsletter written by and created for people with addiction. Our mission is to validate that experience so people know that they are not alone, and to emphasize the many unique roads that we take to recovery. This is an opportunity to share our experiences to creatively support each other. We are non-political, non-denominational, multi-racial, and gender neutral. Our mission is one of recovery and harm reduction, and all experiences are welcome. All the viewpoints herein are personal in nature and related specifically to our contributors’ recovery.

The 3rd Street Beat Editorial Team Omar C., Shams, Johnny Jungle, Rose, Steven M. and Moses. The 3rd Street Beat is produced by The Recovery Center community with assistance from the occupational therapy team.

3rd Street Beat back issues can be downloaded at: www.projectrenewal.org/rc-newsletters

TABLE OF CONTENTS FEATURES Congrats on Year 2!

by Carli and Lee Ann p. 3 Stigma and Strength

by Shams Da Baron p. 4 Amplify the Voices of the Directly Impacted by Da Homeless Hero p. 5 What Do You Want?

by Rose Dudnik p. 6 A Valuable Lesson from A Donkey

by Emiliano D. p. 8 I Can’t Stay Clean (Inside) and Live a Dirty Life by Grateful N. p. 9

POETRY & PROSE Perfection by Moses Flores p. 4 Peace by Moses Flores p. 6 I Miss My Co-Co in this Cold Climate

by Johnny Jungle 7 p. 7 I Mounted an Anvil

by Steven M. p. 11

ART Cover by Steven M. On the Dock by Steven M p. 4 Tik Tak by Steven M p. 8 Windows by Steven M. p. 13

Follow TRC on Instagram! @recoverycenternyc

SUDOKU (solution p. 6) The rules of the game are simple: each of the nine blocks has to contain all the numbers 1-9 within its squares. Each number can only appear once in a row, column or box.

2

The 3rd Street Beat Celebrates 1 year!

Dear TRC community, Wow! It has been a year of the Third Street Beat. What an accomplishment. Every month I read the newsletter and continue to be so impressed with not only the creativity and artistic ability of this community but your openness and willingness to be vulnerable and continue to share your truths. You utilize your poems, writing, and art to share your stories with not only our community but other people who are eager to read our newsletter each month.

I’m beyond proud of this community and all the continued work each and every one of you put into your recovery!

You all are absolutely amazing!

Sincerely,

Director, TRC

Dear TRC From the very first issue, the works you have published in these pages have astounded me. Your creativity and your huge hearts shine so brightly in these pages! This newsletter is shared widely and has opened more minds than you know.

I have said it many times in person, but here it is in black and white: Let’s celebrate every day you come through our door. That is you showing up for yourself - and for your ‘chosen family,’ too.

Thank you for allowing me the opportunity to be a part of your recovery journey.

Your bravery and willingness to share your thoughts, your stories, your heartbreaks, and your victories in the 3rd Street Beat has inspired many and continues to keep me excited to come to work every day.

Onward and upward in 2021!

Occupational Therapist, TRC

Stigma and Strength

by

Shams aka Da Homeless Hero "Good Morning... I woke up this morning thinking about the "stigma of mental illness" and the "stereotypes of the Black male image", and how it can negatively impact a person challenged with a mental health disorder.

I've taken a bold stance to be vulnerable in the public in a way that is difficult for many Black men in order to show other Black men that you could have a "mental health disorder" or "substance use disorder", get treatment for it, and still be cool. And it's okay to be open about it because it doesn't lessen your value as a man or woman.

So, my ask today is that people remove the stigmas from their minds and disregard the negative stereotypes associated with these disorders, and please, no negative stereotypes about the Black male image. We can remain calm, cool, and collected in moments of chaos and confusion. We won't resort to negative behavior just because things don't go our way. We are actually stronger than one would think and those of us who have a strong support network and engage professionals like psychiatrists or a therapist are very capable of using that network and the skills we obtain to cope in a healthy way with life's challenges. Please when you deal with someone who may have one or both disorders, don't assume the negative if they may appear to be having a bad day.

In this era of Covid, I can tell you that despite overcoming this deadly virus, I still have off days. Add the stress of trying to be there for so many people who look to me for advice, support, and in many cases just an ear to listen. There are times when I do have to detach, shut the phone off, take a walk, and just be to myself. My mind is always active, always thinking and if I don't follow my process I will become overwhelmed and stressed out. My process works for me. In fact, it was so good I refused to get a phone for three years because I enjoyed a life uninterrupted.

In conclusion, please know that I am well. Very well. I would not be as good as I am to others if I wasn't good to myself. Self-care is the best care. I'm not angry, upset, in distress, or disappointed. I've always been clear that we live in a racist society and things are grossly adverse to the growth and development of Black people. As the descendent of slaves who have survived trauma on top of trauma, I can tell you that what does not kill me, actually makes me stronger."

What’s perfect 2 u might be chaos to the next. Although perfect is a word in our dictionary, I believe that it is just ‘a word.’ Perfect is just perception how you perceive things to be. You can not determine what’s perfect for others. Your goal should be to search for what’s perfect to you. Once you find this destination, you will help make this already perfect world that much better. - Moses Flores

Amplify The Voices Of The Directly Impacted

By Da Homeless Hero This speech was delivered by Da Homeless Hero at an event on December 5th, 2020 that was sponsored by community groups the NYC Housing Conservation Coordinators and the West Side Community Alliance.

The 15th Annual West Side Tenants’ Conference NYC Mayoral Candidate Forum: Housing to Homelessness

“

It is a special day for me and I hope that after we finish this gathering it will be a special day for you as well. I’m grateful to deliver the keynote address to the attendees of the 15th Annual West Side Tenants' Conference. I’m thankful that our blessed Creator has created a bridge for us and allowed us to come together during what may be the most challenging times of our lives. This is a time when death and destruction is all around us. Some is manmade and some is the work of nature. The Covid-19 pandemic has wreaked havoc upon the world and there is no one who has not been negatively affected by it. Yet, we who are here today, among the living are not only surviving but we are also thriving. We are thriving because despite all that is going on around us, the fact that you and I are in the same virtual space today, communicating and connecting in a healthy and holistic way, is a testament to our individual and collective growth and development. We are prospering as we journey together along this path towards inner and outer peace. With that being said, let me greet you all with the greetings words of peace as it said in Hebrew “Shalom”, in Arabic “As Salaam Alaikum” and as we in the streets, we simply say “Peace”.

My name is Shams and I’m also known as Da Homeless Hero. I was born to a mother and father who in the late ‘60’s and early 70’s was addicted to heroin. After almost dying at birth due to my mother’s desire to go back to using heroin, I made it into this world only to end up in the custody of the foster care system at the age of two. In the early days I went from home to home until I ended up in a stable family situation where I was able to be exposed to a cultural phenomenon taking place in the South Bronx that we now identify as Hip Hop. Although quite young, I quickly became immersed in all of the elements that comprised this culture and made a name for myself as an MC, what many call a rapper today. I became…

...CONTINUED ON PAGE 10 Facebook: ssHero DaHomele

Twitter: s_hero @homeles

: Instagram lesshero e m @daho

by Rose Dudnik Say to yourself, “Okay. So, I wasn’t supposed to be here. This wasn’t where my addiction was supposed to take me. But, here I am. Now what?”

Only you can answer that. So, decide what it is that you look to gain in the outpatient substance abuse program.

Then, just do it. And realize, what you put in is what you get out. After all, you are the reason that you are here.

No one forced anyone to become an addict. And, the substance you used certainly didn’t just jump into our bodies. We chose to partake. What we put in our bodies is what we got out, addiction.

So, again, we weren’t to end up here. But, we are.

Now what?

Image from freeSVG.com

What do you Want?

I’m not gonna lie. And, I’m certainly not known for sugar coating things. So yeah, there are those who appear to come with the sole purpose of stealing sugar packets and selling things they never paid for.

But who am I to judge?

While their being here may seem pointless, at least they’re here.

Personally, at first I kept coming to get out of the cold, to get a hot cup of coffee. That’s what it took to get my ass in a seat in the group room every morning. Eventually, a few days in, I figured I might as well give this clean and sober thing a chance.

It seemed pretty easy.

If I participated in the groups, if I was honest enough to be honest, I would get exactly that from the groups, honest answers to our common problem, addiction. And you wanna know something? The honest effort I put into my recovery paid off.

I got clean!

Today, I’m a person with a substance abuse disorder living in recovery. December 4th marked nine months that I’m clean and sober. And that I owe, first to myself, and secondly to my TRC peers.

We basically got me clean together. And, if I could pass on a piece of advice, it would be, put in what you wanna get out. Like, if you wanna get clean and sober, put in a clean and sober effort to become so.

No one’s gonna force you to give up your substance of choice! It has to come from within you. And, even if you’re just here for the coffee, a metrocard, whatever, at least it got you in the door. And if it got you in the door. Why not sit your ass in a seat in the group room and listen to what others have to say.

What do you have to lose, except your addiction.

Finally, realize this. Giving up the substance of your personal addiction is the smallest part of your addiction. It’s true! Our substance of choice is only about 10% of our problem. What we need to change is the behaviors that always ended up with us using. And, that’s where the work begins.

Be open to change. It’s definitely a process. If you’re at TRC, you’re in a really great place to start.

Image from shutterstock

SUDOKU solution

Peace I no longer lust for money nor materials.

I no longer look for love...but what I yearn for is peace. 2 be at peace is to be in a tranquil mindset. To be at peace is Priceless. - Moses Flores

By Johnny Jungle

...CONTINUED ON PAGE 12

A Valuable Lesson From “A Donkey,” Never give up! Never expect help on the journey of your struggle!

Moral: Life is going to shovel dirt on you, all kinds of dirt. The trick is not to get bogged down by it. We can get out of the deepest wells by not stopping...and by never giving up! Shake it off and take a step up! With every shovel of dirt that fell on his back, the donkey was doing something amazing. He would shake it off and take a step up.

As the farmer’s neighbors continued to shovel dirt on top of the animal, he would shake it off and take a step up. Pretty soon, everyone was amazed as the donkey stepped up over the edge of the well and happily trotted off.

- Emiliano D.

Donkey Illustration from istockphoto 8

I Can’t Stay Clean and Live (Inside) a Dirty Life

By Grateful N What do I mean by that? I very often hear the words “old behavior” and “addictive behavior” but I don’t really think how my “old behavior” can easily lead me to relapse.

I can’t build a “new house” on “old foundation”, because no matter how beautiful my “house’s old foundation” it is still “old and shaky” and day will come, when all my “beauty” will collapse.

If I would like to start to build my “new life.” I need…No…I must start with a “new foundation” – my thoughts.

My actions (or my behaviors) start from my thoughts. Through many years I built my own “thoughts process habit.” My thoughts were affected by substance use over many years. It’s become my way of thinking... the way of how I lived my life. So my perception of life, if not completely wrong, definitely was full of misunderstandings and incorrect decisions.

I can’t change my “house”/old behaviors and actions without changing my “old foundation”/old thoughts. But how can I do this? How can I change my old thoughts?

I’m not a professional psychologist, and I’m not qualified to answer all these questions. I’m still in the process of learning. But in the Orthodox Church we have Great Teachers, who show us how to do this by their own example by their holy life.

One of them is Father Ephraim (Moraitis). He taught that any changes are a process and need time.

Little by little, step by step we can change our thought process..if we put some work in it.

Geronda (Elder) Ephraim the Arizonian explained it this way: “Think of an airport. Every airport has a tower which helps airplanes arriving from different directions and places of the world to land there. The pilot of the individual aircraft must first identify who he is, where he is coming from, the country of origin, etc. but it must always be verified by the tower before permission to land is given. The human mind resembles an airport.

All kinds of thoughts enter our minds throughout the day - but especially when we are worshipping and at times of prayer. Every Christian believer must always exercise caution and discernment before one allows any thought to settle in his/her mind. He/she must examine the thought carefully and identify its origin before he/she allows it to enter. If the person does not exercise caution and discernment and the evil one enters, the evil one may eventually take control of the mind and lead the person to destruction. The Christian must not hesitate to run to his/her father confessor and seek his guidance and blessing to overcome the temptation and assault from the devil. Through the grace of the Holy Spirit the believer will be protected and freed from every demonic influence.

P.S. by Father John (Krestiankin): “Always remember that God’s Providence teaches a lesson in Spiritual Life in every situation. If you enter into this work, everything will come together in its time. Labor in peace to the glory of His Holy Name!

Illustration from shutterstock

Homeless Hero CONTINUED FROM PAGE 5 quite popular and as I grew in popularity, I was able to help influence the culture as it began to spread. I later went on to produce records, own my own record labels, and recordings studios. All of this while in my early to mid-teens.

Despite that rich history there was another side that found me in a group home by the time I was 10 years old. Not long after being placed there I ended up going AWOL which meant I began to stay in the streets. By the time I turned 12 I was told that I had been discharged and had to go back to wherever I came from. It was difficult during these formidable years of my life as I navigated the gritty and extremely dangerous streets of New York City at a time when Forty Deuce was not a family-friendly place. Avoiding the pimps, pedophiles and predators that roamed the streets looking for fresh young meat was not a simple task. However, thanks to my early training among some of the toughest gangs in my neighborhood and with the mentoring of the leaders of some of those gangs, I became proficient in the use of razors, my 007 switch blade and also my wits.

With the wisdom bestowed upon by my mentors I saw value in learning from books and of those books, two stand out as sort of like Bibles to me. One was Sun Tzu’s “Art of War” and the other was “Nicolo Machiavelli’s “The Prince”. From these books I learned how to fight battles without bloodshed, defeat my enemies in their minds and how to combine the characteristics of a Lion and a Fox. I was courageous and fearless like a Lion yet cunning like a fox. I understood that one without the other, would not be sufficient to survive in the world I was growing up in. By being a combination of the two I was able to survive those gritty streets as a young teen. I survived the horrors of the crack era and so much throughout my life, and so with total confidence I can come before you and say, I have a compelling story to tell. From my life experience, I tell a story, that if amplified, it could resonate with others who come from where I come from, who’ve experienced what I’ve experienced but who can benefit from one who has mastered the art of turning negatives into positives, tragedies into triumphs, stumbling blocks into stepping stones and obstacles into opportunities.

You have before you a man who in less than five months, have impacted not just the people of Manhattan’s Upper West Side, but people all throughout the City of New York, and the United States.

People in other countries are tuning into my story, the story of the men of the Lucerne and the beautiful and impactful work of UWS Open Hearts Initiative. We’ve become so impactful that all of New York City’s Mayoral candidates now have to address not just the issue of homelessness but also the issue of the current Mayor’s wrongful and inhumane treatment of the men of the Lucerne. My advocacy and work with the support of OHI have led to the shaping of a model of how a shelter population can properly integrate into a community and grow within that community through community engagement and partnerships with the shelter provider. My work with OHI, support from elected officials, faith leaders and other community organizations is a testament to that. The support I now have from my shelter provider, Project Renewal is a testament to that. We have all done good in this short amount of time.

However, despite all of our good works, I sense danger around the corner. Many have called me in the last two weeks and have warned me of something so dangerous that I feel compelled to speak on it today. It is not the activities of the Mayor that I have to worry about. It is not the hateful and racist rhetoric that can be found online that I have to concern myself with. No, this is different type of danger. The danger to which I speak of is the attempt to assassinate, my voice. To silence me, to make me disappear, to lock the door to the room where the discussions are being held, and deny me a seat at the table. Denying someone who has been directly impacted by all the failings of our city and state government, like myself, is so dangerous because it denies all of us a pivotal role in shaping the policies and the changes that need to take place in order to fix, to make better, what is now and forever has been, a broken system.

I want you to understand the value of amplifying the voices of those who are directly impacted by homelessness. Those who are street homeless, those who are residing in shelters and those who are not yet homeless but are housing insecure. I ask that you continue to not just amplify my voice but there are many voices, crying in the wilderness, looking to be heard, and wanting to have a seat at the table. Let us sit with you, converse with you and strategize with you, to initiate change and eradicate homelessness. We’ve asked the Mayor and his wife, the First Lady to do this and I’ve said, that it hurts to challenge the City in court. I asked them both to come and meet with us, and all sides of the community here on the Upper... ...CONTINUED ON NEXT PAGE

HOMELESS HERO CONTINUED FROM PAGE 7.. West Side. He and his wife both have denied our requests. The Mayor has said to Councilwoman Helen Rosenthal that he will not speak to those directly impacted by his decisions. That was painful to hear. It is as if we are not worthy to have an audience with the Mayor despite his decision to displace us. By his actions it’s easy to understand why he has characterized us as being “not acceptable” and led the campaign to dehumanize, demoralizing, and traumatize the men of Lucerne.

Despite the Mayor’s assault on our dignity and character, today we have a unique opportunity. We can use this unique time in our history to shed light on the way this City and government deals with people experiencing homelessness and housing insecurity. Let’s use this moment to demand change and compel anyone seeking office in any capacity or who is currently in office to address, not just the issue of the men of the Lucerne, but to also address the issue of homelessness throughout this City and work to give us back our dignity and our respect. Housing is a human right. Housing justice is racial justice. You can’t have one without the other.

I personally ask that you not aid and abet the haters and enemies of our cause who wish to assassinate my voice. Lift me up for I am impactful. I walk the streets, and throughout the Lucerne, and you can see my fellow residents are now feeling a sense of confidence that was once confusion. They now are demanding change in other things. They are seeing the value is speaking up and speaking out. This is something special. They want their voices to be heard as well. My example is inspiring to them and others.

Nothing I do is self-serving. It is for the benefit of us all. I don’t want to be Da Homeless Hero forever. I wanna change my name to Da Housing Hero. I want to be active in building and providing homes for people. Empower me, and I’ll empower others. If you want to end homelessness then you must first Amplify The Voices Of The Directly Impacted.

In closing, I must leave a quote from Martin Luther King Jr, and then Malcom X, two of my heroes:

“Oppressed people cannot remain oppressed forever.

The yearning for freedom eventually manifests itself.”

- Martin Luther King Jr “Human rights are something you were born with. Human rights are your God-given rights.

Human rights are the rights that are recognized by all nations of this earth. And any time anyone violates your human rights, you can take them to the world court.”

- Malcom X Illustration from tennsportsmed.com

I mounted an anvil / with a purpose of real / still I stood still, a real appeal / without footwork mindless ride / still my foot hurts ain’t shed a tear / sure this hell still lurks / tho the dirt on my name / the tattoos in my veins I’m still in the game / I what’s real, what ain’t strange / overthoughts, and what hurts my brain / I can’t be conscious in this moment playin’ / with a high connection ain’t all’s needed / wheels got a hole still that’s seated / but I will and control / I am not heated / if I had a lifestyle I’d be in more agreements / good deeds 2, just go so far / broke my car / when the hell will I get another care / I feel far but I’m near / pedal 2 the metal / metal gear / Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde / I’m going to fly / havin no fear / intimidated and complications / I hold post on my station / my success is compassion / I still love this vacation / deale me hold on / sincerely urs, stay strong.

- Steven McGlothlin

Johnny Jungle Continued from p. 7...

CONTINUED ON NEXT PAGE

Johnny Jungle Continued...

Drawing by Steven M.

Recovery Center Weekly Schedule for December 2020

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