Topeka Presbyterian Manor
OCTOBER 2021
Editor’s note: This month’s guest chaplain is Greg Schmidt, chaplain for Heart & Soul Hospice of Wichita and Newton Presbyterian Manor. In a nod to our Presbyterian heritage, we will be periodically sharing columns from our community chaplains in your Community Matters newsletter.
Chaplain’s Corner What birds can teach us about faith By Greg Schmidt, Chaplain I can hear a few birds talking to one another outside my office window. Grackles squawk and beg for peanut-flavored suet. Sparrows chirp about how greedy the grackles are any time any food is available. And the Baltimore Orioles are sharing that they discovered a well of Welch’s® grape jelly! How do I know what they’re saying? Because I sit for hours on my deck … and listen! (I’m secretly hoping the birds will come and sit on my shoulder or perch on my hand!) Trust me, birds live in a neverending search for food! Jolene Zirkle, our new human resources director
Topeka Presbyterian Manor welcomes Jolene Zirkle As the new director of human resources, Jolene Zirkle is here to support the employees who care for the residents at Topeka Presbyterian Manor. Jolene joined our community in July and says she brings a new perspective to her role. “I bring a fresh set of eyes and a different way of doing things,” she said. So far, one her favorite things about her new position is the relationship she has established with Executive Director Heather Pilkinton, who often asks
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Interestingly, the Bible says God provides for the needs of the sparrow. But that doesn’t mean those little chirpers can just sit back and have it delivered! Sure, the food is there. Available. But they have to go in search of it! By the way, it’s the same for you and I. Only our never-ending search is for love! It’s there. Available. Jesus said, “For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and the one who knocks, the door
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Addressing my life Rewriting an old address book reveals how connections and relationships have changed By Marcia Byalick I spent a bittersweet and humbling afternoon doing a job most people born after 1970 have never done. It was a task familiar to people who buy stamps and send anniversary cards. The kind of person who still writes checks and leaves voice messages. It was a quiet, tech-free activity where I communed with some of the characters who’ve drifted in and out of my life. Like weeding the garden or cleaning out the junk drawer, the task wound up more daunting than I anticipated. For three hours last Thursday, I rewrote my address book. For those who grew up with all their contact information stored on their phone, an address book (which for my first 40 years I called a phone book), is a handwritten paper directory with A-Z tabs along the edge. It caught me off guard, those hours spent retracing my past. Who do I choose to not transcribe again? Mine was decades-old, a bulging mess of business cards and outdated details held together with a rubber
band. It was a practical document full of how to get in touch with plumbers and doctors and neighbors and hairdressers. And cousins and lawyers and colleagues and friends. And a repository of lives lived and lost. Restaurants, and people “out of business.”A chapter in the book about me. It caught me off guard, those hours spent retracing my past. Who do I choose to not transcribe again? Some decisions are more clear cut than others. The vet for my cat who died 10 years ago? Out. My first cousin who I lost touch with around the same time? Hmmm, he stays in. That old college friend; do I have any intention of staying in touch? Probably not. So do I “lose” her – delete her – forever? That's a hard one. Occupations and Addresses From the Past I rolled my eyes at the convoluted way I double-entered certain people for quicker retrieval under their name: Frank, James and their occupation — Accountant, Gardener. It surprised me how seemingly irrelevant last names were
Marcia Byalick's address book Credit: Marcia Byalick
of those my car and nails and home depend on. I also added some new names. This year was a chips-are-down time for me, and the number of random people and distant friends who stepped up deserve to be included. After a challenging year, the love, caring and laughs provided by friends mean more than ever. The number of Florida addresses highlighted the passage of time. Some of my friends have been at an address as familiar to me as my own; some moved four times. I felt bereft rewriting addresses with half a couple. So many stories. “Why didn't you just update your
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COMMUNITY MATTERS | October 2021
is published monthly for residents and friends of Topeka Presbyterian Manor by Presbyterian Manors of Mid-America, Inc., a not-for-profit 501(c)(3) organization.
To submit or suggest articles: dloftin@pmma.org Heather Pilkinton, executive director Danica Loftin, marketing director
OUR MISSION: To provide quality senior services guided by Christian values.
Zirkle – continued from page 1 Jolene for her take on an established process. Jolene says when she’s approaching a problem, “I don’t like to hear, ‘Well, that’s the way we’ve always done it.’” It’s always worthwhile to examine what’s in place to see if there are ways to make improvements that benefit employees. Jolene has worked in the human resources field for three years and earned her master’s in human resources in 2020. Previously, she worked in HR for the Kanza Mental Health and Guidance Center in Hiawatha, Kan. She earned her undergraduate
degree in criminal justice at Washburn University with the ambition of working in a correctional facility. While in college, she had her first child. That motivated her to look for a safer, more stable work environment. “I like working with people, so I really like the employee engagement and doing the fun things” that come with an HR career, she said. When it comes to the more challenging aspects of her job, Jolene puts personal feelings aside and works to find solutions that serve both the employee and the community as a whole. Jolene has three children. Her oldest, Sydney, is a junior at Washburn and
plans to go on to the Master of Library Sciences program at Emporia State. Newlywed Abigail studies elementary education through the University of NebraskaLincoln. She is enrolled in the program remotely from Japan, where she lives with her husband, who is in the Air Force. The youngest, Gabriel, is a sophomore in high school. When she’s not working, Jolene enjoys reading, particularly books by her favorite writer, Nicholas Sparks. She can often be found in her kitchen, baking a cake — “nothing fancy,” she says. She travels whenever possible, and her favorite destination is Hatteras Island, part of North Carolina’s Outer Banks. u
Chaplain – continued from page 1 attitudes and actions. A gentle touch. will be opened.” (Matthew 7:8). In this case, love is there … but action is necessary. We have to search for it! So, I’m happy to report that the longer I spend time with my Presbyterian Manor and Heart & Soul Hospice workmates and families, the more I understand and appreciate how plentiful love is! It’s there for the searching! Acts of Love. Compassion. The efforts to assist others in discovering peace of mind and spirit – for the patient and the employees – the energy given to providing a helping hand, a forgiving and encouraging spirit. Grace. Mercy. Patience for residents/patients … and their families. Generosity. Pay it forward
A shoulder to cry on. Someone to laugh with. Being a fellow burdenbearer and prayer warrior! I see them all the time! They’re here! At Presbyterian Manor! My grandkids created a sign for me and my wife that says, “Next time you feel alone … don’t!” It’s their way of saying back to Gram and Pops what we always say to them; namely, “We’re here! We want to share life with you! We love you more than you will ever realize! Make the phone call! Write the text! Stop one or both of us and say, ‘I’m lonely or needy!’ Remember, we’re not mind-readers, but we’ll respond faster and love you deeper than you could ever imagine!’” It’s love given. And love returned. No one has to enter into a never-ending search. It’s here!
So, keep “chirping!” Let your needs be known! So many of our staff serve a God that has a never-ending supply of love. And lots of us are following Him as closely as we know how. P.S. If you don’t provide your Baltimore Orioles with “Welch’s grape jelly” … according to the husband of a past resident, they will come peck on your kitchen window and tell you, “Go back to Dillons® and get Welch’s, not Smucker’s®!” They’re grape jelly snobs. Just thought you should know! u
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Addresses – continued from page 2 contacts?” asks my daughter. For so many reasons she'd find unreasonable. In no special order, there's the near and dear issue of WHAT IF. My generation likes a back-up. A Valuable Hard Copy A “real” address book won’t crash or become corrupted or be rendered useless if there's a power failure or a natural disaster. It won’t be stolen, its hard drive won’t fail and its battery won't die. It'll never have to be revived in a bowl of rice if it’s accidentally dropped in the toilet. Of course, I recognize the worth of my cell phone’s memory for speed dialing. I still like myself a hard copy.
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COMMUNITY MATTERS | October 2021
The lo-fi list of the address book’s whereabouts in my kitchen drawer is easy to reference for Christmas cards and party invites. When I recently had to call all my credit card companies and banks, it was handy to have all the particulars in one place. Lastly, in the icky getting-affairs-inorder category ICID (in case I die), a paper address book — a mash-up of the personal and the professional — is straightforward access to all you need to know. Anyone I’ve asked who still uses an address book admits it’s been in their lives for so long, it's “worn and tattered,” and “falling apart.” They share my belief that between its covers are not just organized facts; there’s an accounting of the
center stage and bit players featured in our lifetime memories. That’s why when I finished up at Z, I put the old, battered copy — the one with my father’s last phone number and the no-longer accurate addresses of places I laughed and learned and grieved — in a drawer in my bedroom. Next to the even older address book in my mother’s handwriting. There is comfort in the fact that my contacts are in the cloud, preserved in the digital world. Safe there along with the hundreds of photos on my phone. But the cloud will never elicit the kind of sighs or smiles as the shelf of a dozen photo albums in my den. Or a glance back through my obsolete, dilapidated address book. It’s good to have back up. u