Please

Please

Kaitlyn Inderwies

"Please don't break into my car. We'll both be disappointed," read the bumper sticker on the beat-up, green Subaru. The car looked ancient and had clearly seen better days. The sticker made Charles laugh, but at the same time...hmm, challenge accepted, buddy. He casually strolled over and pulled on the handle. It was unlocked. This guy really just didn't care, did he? Charles climbed into the passenger seat, flicked the novelty air freshener, and took a look around. All he found was some insurance papers in the glove compartment, loose change in the cup holder and a pair of cheap sunglasses hanging off the mirror.

Well...the sticker did warn him that he’d be disappointed: there was nothing fun here at all.

He had been hoping for something exciting. Giving it one last chance, Charles turned around to rummage in the back seat and stopped.

What the...was that...a muppet?

Sure enough, in the back seat of the car was a muppet wearing a cowboy hat strapped safely into the back seat. Before Charles could start asking himself some serious questions, the driver's side door opened, and the slightly disheveled owner of the car plopped into the seat with a coffee in hand. Turning to put his coffee in the cup holder, they made eye contact and it was silent for a beat. The car owner threw Charles a deadpan stare and sighed. "Dude...come on...it said please."