Kids Say The Darndest Things

Story by Hayley Harrison / Staff Writer

I think for most of us, fall typically brings forth feelings of nostalgic warmth. Images of plaid, pumpkins, perfectly tinted leaves and glorious seven-day forecasts are brought to the forefront of our brains. Our senses come alive at the thought of sipping

PSLs (that’s short for pumpkin spice lattes, for my nonbasic friends reading this) on our sofa, while wearing our treasured sweatshirts and watching our favorite fall “classics” on television. We can practically taste the five-star soup that is bubbling up in our crockpots and smell the Food Network-worthy treats that are rising up in our ovens – and sharing these coveted fall moments with our angelic children. That just puts it overthe-top!

(I hope by this point I have adequately set the scene for my ideal fall day, because it was on one such day that I shared a moment with my oldest daughter that I will never forget.) I had just picked her up from school, and we were heading home to devour our secret stash of Halloween candy (Honey, if you are reading this, I’m so sorry you had to find out this way) and binge-watch a show of her choosing. She chose “Spookley the Square Pumpkin” as her first “watch,” and if you are unfamiliar with our good friend, Spookley, it is my distinct pleasure to introduce you.

So basically, Spookley is a very kind and friendly pumpkin living in the pumpkin patch of a farm. He is everything a noble pumpkin should be, except for one thing – he is square instead of round (I know the shock you all must be feeling now). As we all know, being different as a child (or in this particular case, pumpkin) is far from easy. It is unfortunately true that kids can be cruel, so I found this to be the perfect opportunity to preach to my daughter about the necessary value of always being inclusive and kind to others, even if we view them as different than ourselves.

I went on and on, drawing parallels between the pumpkin characters on TV and the children that we all once were on the playground (pumpkin patch). I felt pretty satisfied with myself for the life lesson that I so obviously taught her, and gave myself a pat on the back for a parenting job well done. I let her finish the rest of the movie in peace, and when it ended I decided to affirm my superior parenting skills by asking her one final question. “We would be friends with Spookley, wouldn’t we?” I casually asked as I was grabbing another handful of miniature KitKats. It was at this point that she looked me straight into my soul, with her big, expressive, precious brown eyes and said, “Heck no. I’d cut that sucker up and make a pumpkin pie out of it.”