98040 - 2014 Island Summer

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VING I L D AN R ISL E C R ME

ISLAND

A PUBLICATION OF THE MERCER ISLAND REPORTER

14 0 2 R E SUMM

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98040 | 2014 ISLAND SUMMER

7005 SE 20th St | Mercer Island

Your house could be next!

98040

MERCER ISLAND LIVING

ISLAND SUMMER

Here’s to another Island Summer!

In this issue of 98040, we offer just a sample of the many activities available to Islanders young and old — right here at home.

Roanoke celebrates 100 years An event sampler A ‘Night Out’ and more Islander invents new game

INSIDE

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Healthy kids

From sampling fresh fruit and tasty treats at the Farmers Market to music and drama at our parks and the Blue Angels roaring overhead, there is something for everyone.

The centerpiece of the summer is, of course, Summer Celebration! set for July 12 and 13, in the Town Center.

See our center section for a pull-out listing of Summer Celebration activities.

Grab some sunscreen, your appetite, a re-usuable shopping bag and a lawn chair — and get ready for Summer!

REPORTER

Mercer Island

98040 | ISLAND SUMMER

3047 78th Ave. S.E. Mercer Island, WA 98040 (206) 232-1215 Fax (206) 232-1284 www.mi-reporter.com

Mary L. Grady, Editor editor@mi-reporter.com Joseph Livarchik, Staff Writer Celina Kareiva, Staff Writer Melanie Morgan, Production Theres’a Baumann, Advertising tbaumann@mi-reporter.com

A Division of

Photos and art credits: Matt Brashears, Mary L. Grady, Pat Taylor, Mercer Island Visual Arts League, Mercer Island Farmers Market, StatePoint.net/Washington.

Breakfast Monday – Friday

Buy 1 entrée and get the second entrée of equal or lesser value for FREE,

206.232.6676 www.the-islander.com

2441 - 76th Ave SE Suite 150 | in the Aviara building | Mercer Island

Now Serving Breakfast Starting at 7am Monday - Friday and 8am Saturday - Sunday

1075059

available 7 a.m. – 11 a.m.

Expiration Date: September 21, 2014

EVERYDAY!

New Summer Hours: Monday - Thursday: 10:00am to 6:00pm Friday and Saturday: 10:00am to 7:00pm Open Sundays: 12 noon to 5:00pm

98040 | 2014 ISLAND SUMMER

Friday, Saturday & Sunday: Chocolate Dipped Strawberries!

(We welcome special orders!)

Chocolate Classes

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Come early and join us!

Summer Celebration Saturday July 12, 2014

Luther Burbank Park 2040 84th Ave. SE Mercer Island, WA

10:30 pm Fireworks

Come Celebrate with Us. It’s Our Birthday!

Established in 1914 by George MacGuire, the Rowy is the oldest business on Mercer Island

@RoanokeInn 4

The Rowy cherishes its role as the informal gathering spot for all class reunions from those who graduated from the local schools. The place to be for all those attending college to come back home and reunite with their buddies, and in many cases the place to have your first beer when celebrating your 21st birthday.

To show our appreciation to our patrons and the community who have supported the Rowy for so many decades, we are sponsoring the local fireworks show during the city’s Summer Celebration event Saturday, July 12th.

(206) 232-0800 • roanokeinnmi@gmail.com In our celebration we would love to include personal stories from family, friends and our community about the good times they shared at the Roanoke Inn over the years.

Please send your stories to tbaumann@mi-reporter.com

Where Friends Meet Friends for 100 Years 1825 ~ 72nd Avenue SE, Mercer Island, WA 98040

98040 | 2014 ISLAND SUMMER

1072919

The Roanoke Inn has witnessed a lot of change since its construction in 1914. Horseback was the principal mode of transportation and patrons came to visit via ferry from the Leschi neighborhood in Seattle. Two World Wars were fought, abolitionist policies have come and gone, great depressions were weathered, and floating bridges were constructed to support the growth of automobiles. The introduction of both radio and television and now the evolution of the computer generation has changed many things. But no matter what the Inn has witnessed, The Rowy has always been the community’s extended living room to discuss all the topics of daily importance.

One hundred years at the ‘Rowy’ The venerable Roanoke Tavern is 100 years old

By Celina Kareiva The Roanoke has been called through the years, a living room, a tavern and a brothel. This summer, the Island fixture turns 100 and there is no shortage of memories made behind these old walls. Leading a tour of the space, owner Dorothy Reeck points out quirks and vignettes the untrained eye could never find: a bullet hole behind the bar that Reeck’s bootlegging father-in-law is responsible for; an ancient cash register now defunct; windows once blacked out during World War II. The Roanoke was built in 1914

by George McGuire as a “chickendinner” restaurant servicing the Island’s early settlers. A ferry dock at the North-end made it a popular destination; its original owners could make a run to Seattle for ice cream and other goodies not found on the Island.

Pat Taylor/Special to the Reporter The place changed hands several times during the Great Depression This watercolor by Pat Taylor depicts the beloved Roanoke Inn, which turns 100 this year. before evolving eventually into a Roannoke management is sponsoring Summer Celebration! to show its gratitude. tavern, housing boarders on the top floor and, some say operating as a brothel during Prohibition years. In balancing act, admits Reeck. When staff themselves by the Roanoke’s genera1943, Edwin and Laura Reeck bought paint, they stay true to a color palette tor. The dimly lit dining room has seen the building. That’s when Dorothy en- available in early 20th century America; proposals and wedding ceremonies. ters the picture. She met and married the windows are the same drooping For many Island youth, working there is their son, Hal. glass and antique panes as were in- a sort of rite of passage.

As her mother-in-law aged, she took stalled decades ago; even the garden, This year, Roanoke management is which Reeck insists everyone has had a sponsor of the Island’s Summer Celon more responsibilities.

“I call myself the caretaker. I have to their hands in, is a mess of some of the ebration! On a recent drippy Friday, when summer still felt a long ways take care of this place and pass it on to original blooms planted.

But as the Roanoke’s centennial off, volunteers were upstairs folding Tthe next generation.”

Reeck points to an old phone booth neared, Reeck thought about retir- shirts and sweatshirts for the event.

“This is our way of saying thank you,” off the main dining room—a sort of ing. She wasn’t sure she was the right person to carry the tavern into its next said Reeck. symbol of the Roanoke’s many incarchapter, so she began talks with ponations. The booth used to bring in As for the Roanoke’s next 100 years, $10-20 a month. Now emply, the booth tential buyers: “When we went back Reeck has hired a general manager hosts a witch for Halloween and Santa to the attorneys to talk about it, he and says as he learns the ropes, she said—‘you’re not ready to go.’ Certainly, hangs out at Christmas. will consider who best to inherit the I couldn’t deny it. I felt like it wasn’t the legacy. She has ideas — a better and “I don’t know how I managed to keep time.” wider wine selection, small tweaks to the status quo going. It’s a full-time job She says the memories are what sus- the menu. of running the staff and making it ready for customers,” said Reeck. “You’ve got tain her.

It will still be “the neighborhood bar “I am so thankful for all the good peothe building, the grounds — how do but with a fresh coat of paint.” you fit into a neighborhood with a bar? ple that come here and find happiness and provide a little cheer.”

You learn an awful lot.”

During snow storms or power outPreserving the tavern’s history while making sure it fits its surroundings, is a ages, many neighbors have warmed 98040 | 2014 ISLAND SUMMER

5 things you didn’t know about the Roanoke Tavern: 1. Like any good neighborhood bar, the Roanoke has ruffled a few feathers over the years. A family near the Roanoke Inn filed a claim against the city in 2006, calling the historic establishment an “ongoing cancer in the neighborhood.” The aggreived party alleged that the bar sold alcohol to minors, created traffic congestion and was a constant noise complaint. The resulting lawsuit was eventually dismissed.

2. Owner Dorothy Reeck grows pumpkins in a small garden just north of the tavern. The orange squash are hundreds of pounds heavy.

3. Legend has it that when the Roanoke used to accept boarders on the second story, some of the rooms operated as a brothel and a favorite spot for gambling during the Prohibition era.

4. The Roanoke’s covered porch is heated, but Reeck admits while a popular refuge during the winter months, it’s not too effective when the wind blows. Even further back, the Roanoke used to have a wrap-around porch, like many old houses in the craftsman style.

5. The Roanoke operated as a grocery store for a number of years, even opening an ice cream window after Prohibition, where kids, who weren’t allowed inside, could buy cones or other small grocery items. During WWII the Roanoke had one of the only grocery stores accessible to Islanders.

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K SHOW PAUL BUNYAN LUMBERJAC chopping, crosscut , hot saw racing, 2 man underhand

w features log rolling Learn some timber history, try This action-packed Lumberjack Sho World Champion Lumberjacks. h wit ll …a ing saw in cha r off their skills in this family sawing, and dragste s, and see the lumberjacks show ant ticip par e ienc aud y luck the to become one of entertainment show. & 2:30pm

am, 1pm, Show times - Saturday: 11:30

:30pm 2:30pm & 4pm | Sunday: 12

ale Park) (next to the skate park in Mercerd

& 2 1 y l u J

Mercerdale Park *Fireworks festivities a

www.misumme Kid’s Concert with Recess Monkey!

The Mercer Island Community Fund is sponsoring a special kid concert before the fireworks. Seattle’s own Recess Monkey is the nationally acclaimed trio of teachers who make music for kids and families that truly rocks. Seamlessly meshing their indie-rock roots with their keen awareness of childhood themes, the band continues to make waves coast to coast. “Deep Sea Diver” is the band’s ninth album, showcasing the high-energy, pitch-perfect understanding of what gets kids excited that has launched them into national awareness.

Luther Burbank Park, Saturday, July 12: 7:15pm

Entertainment • Fun Run • Parade • Jr. Arts S Arts & Crafts • Kids Fun Zone • 3 on 3 Ba Including special Northwe

Fireworks Sponsor: Our top sponsor this year is the historic Roanoke Inn who is celebrating 100 years of business on Mercer Island. Watch for the largest fireworks show ever seen at Summer Celebration, all in thanks to sponsorship from the Roanoke Inn. Happy Centennial Roanoke Inn!

Thank You to Our 2014 Sponsors!

Children’s Fun Zone

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Children’s Obstacle Course

Fireworks Shuttle 98040 | 2014 ISLAND SUMMER

Grand Parade and Recess Monkey Concert

Entertainment Stage Ciscoe Morris

M

CHAINSAW CARVING

Come watch our chainsaw artists Pat McVay and Steve Backus from Whidbey Island WA, transform ordinary pieces of alread y-downed wood into beautiful pieces of art with their chainsaws! Steve and Pat will have a wide variety of already carved pieces for sale and will be creati ng new pieces on site so you can see them in action. Rumor has it they will have some great items for the Seahawks Fans out there so stop on by 12th Man!

Saturday: 11am to 5pm Sunday: 12pm to 4pm (next to the skate park in Mercerdale Park)

BOAT RIDES AROUND THE ISLAND

Hop aboard the Argosy “Celebrations” to cruise in comfo rt while hearing fun facts and history about the island on our narrated boat rides. Grab a snack or drink from the no-ho st bar, relax, and take in the spectacular views as you sail all the way around the Island.

Three sailing times are available Saturday: 10:30am, 12:30pm & 2:30pm $10 for children 17 & under, $15 for adults 18 & older.

To purchase a ticket, call 206.275.7609 or visit the Comm unity Center.

(Boats leave from Luther Burbank docks- free, reserved parking)

& 13, 2014

Car Show

it y Band Commun

rk, Mercer Island at Luther Burbank Park

ir Street Fa

mercelebration.com

Gardening Talk with Ciscoe Morris: Ciscoe’s Favorite Summer Bloomers plus Q & A

Show • Food Vendors • Car Show • Boat Rides Basketball Tourney • Spectacular Fireworks west themed entertainment!

Ciscoe will entertain you with a humorous, yet informative presentation on summer blooming plants. He will include all kinds of garden tips and may even perform the hummingbird mating dance. Ooh la la! There will be sufficient time to answer all your gardening questions.

Windermere Stage in Mercerdale Park: 1pm

Booth Sponsors: All the Best Pet Care, Booth Construction, Brad Judy DDS, Club Sunglass Inc., Costco, Covenant Shores, Cutco Cutlery, Edward Jones, Gustoblende, Gutter Solutions NW, Hot Jamz Radio, John L. Scott, Karate West, Leafguard Northwest, Luxury Bath of Seattle, Mercer Island Eyeworks, Mercer Island North Chevron, Mercer Island Pediatric Dentistry, Mercer Island Reporter, MIVAL, Mud Bay, Renewal by Andersen, RET PT Group, Springfree Trampoline, Sterling Milfoil Removal, Z-Ultimate Defense Studios, ING Financial Partners, Mercer Island Crossfit, Usborne Books & More, Thomas Dentistry.

Mercer Mile Fun Run

3 on 3 Basketball Tournament

Car Show 98040 | 2014 ISLAND SUMMER

Radio Media

Children’s Arts & Crafts Tent

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Dance, sing, laugh and swim

Lifeguards on Duty

Mostly Music in the Park 2014:

Lifeguards on duty June 15 through September 2, 11 a.m.-7 p.m.

JULY Thursday, July 24 Coco Loco (Latin)

Thursday, July 31 Spirit of Ojo (African dance band)

AUGUST Thursday, August 7 Mark Whitman Band (American Rhythm and Blues)

Thursday, August 14

Rouge (a French Cafe Band)

Saturday, August 16 Russian Chamber Music Foundation of Seattle (Chamber Music) 6 p.m., Luther Burbank Park Amphitheater

Thursday, August 21

Community Sing-a-Long (with Mercer Island musician, Nancy Stewart)

Shakespeare in the Park - Summer Outdoor Theatre: Wooden O presents two Shakespeare plays with multiple performances at the Luther Burbank Park Amphitheater, between July 10 and August 10.

The Two Gentleman of Verona

Lifeguards on duty June 15 through September 2, 12-7 p.m.

Mary Wayte Pool is open in July, closed in August.

Monday: 5:30 a.m.-10 p.m.

Tuesday, Thursday: 5:30 a.m.-8 p.m.

Wednesday, Friday: 5:30 a.m.-9 p.m.

Saturday: 7 a.m.-2:30 p.m.

Sunday: 10 a.m.-2:30 p.m.

For information visit: www.mercerislandpool.com.

Proteus and Valentine are best friends until love drives a wedge between them.

Clarke Beach:

7 p.m., July, 10, 11, 17, 18, 19 2 p.m., July 12 for Summer Celebration 7 p.m., August 3, 7, 8, 9, 10

Julius Caesar In this popular Shakespearean drama, politics, power and pride play out in the fall of the Roman Republic.

FREE

7 p.m., July 13, 20, 24, 25, 26, 31 7 p.m., August 1, 2

En Canto (Brazilian Orchestra)

Groveland Beach: Mary Wayte Pool:

Absolutely

Celebrate summer on the Island with the Art’s Council’s annual concert series. Performances run July through August in Mercerdale Park, from 7-8:30 p.m. unless otherwise noted.

Luther Burbank:

Sunday, August 24

Swimming areas are open but don't have lifeguards on duty.

Calkins Landing:

Swimming areas are open but don't have lifeguards on duty.

Seafair 2014

Blue Angels return LIFE The PLANNING to the Boeing Seafair Air SEMINAR Show at Genesee Park.

1:45 p.m., Aug. 1-3.

Check mi-reporter.com How Traditional Planning Fails Retirees?

for bridge closures.

Retirees experiencing longer life spans are faced with financial threats stemming from uncovered medical and long term care costs. The traditional estate planning that retirees rely on to protect their assets is leading most of them to bankruptcy!

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If you attend how you to

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Issaquah Date: Sep 17 (Tuesday) gingOptions is an educational and information resource forpm – 8:30 pm Time: 6:30 Venue: Hilton Hotel, seniors and their loved ones. Our goal is to help families Issaquah WA. plan for, pay for and coordinate the long-term care of

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elderly loved ones. AgingOptions has been helping elderly clients and their families avoid the financial, legal and emotional disasters of aging.

Federal Way

Our services are geared towards retirees and those thinking about retirement and concerned about: Featuring independence & having to move to a nursing home.

Elder Law Attorney your assets to uncovered medical or long term care costs. and Aging Options Radio Show Host

• Losing • Losing • Becoming a burden on your loved ones.

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Edmonds

Octoberof 03 an (Thursday) Date:aSep 21 (Saturday) Date:ere Sep comes 21 ( Saturday) “Th a time when family needs theDate: services Time: 6:30 pm – 8:30 pm Time: 6:30 pm – 8:30 pm Time: 1:30 pm – 3:30 pm attorney who knows elder law and estate planning. The the quality Venue: Edmonds Conference Center, Venue: Aging Options Campus, Venue: Red Lion Hotel, of service that was provided was WA. outstanding.

Edmonds Olympiaby WA.Aging Options Federal Way WA. Our need was complicated and stressful. We appreciate the skill Bothell and dedication shown byTacoma all the staff especially Mr. Nagaich.

Date: October 01 (Tuesday) Date: October 05 (Saturday) My wife and I especially Time: appreciated the element of caring and 6:30 pm – 8:30 pm Time: 1:30 pm – 3:30 pm understanding.” John Ausnes Venue: Country Inn & Suites, Venue: Marriott Hotel,

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98040 | 2014 ISLAND SUMMER

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A

Summer

highlights

SOLARIZE WORKSHOPS: Earlier this year, the city launched a solarize initiative to encourage residents on the Island to invest in solar panels for their homes and businesses. To bolster efforts, the city is offering free workshops throughout the summer. By recruiting residents to install the panels in bulk, they can save between 10 to 15 percent in cost. Those who attend the summer solarize workshops can learn about local loan programs, how the system will pay for itself and may be eligible for free site assessments.

July 8 (webinar), 12-1 p.m.

August 12, 6-7:30 p.m.

September 20, 10-11:30 a.m.

NATIONAL NIGHT OUT: August 5, 6-9 p.m.

National Night Out celebrates its sixth year on the Island, and its 31st across the country. National Night Out is a crime prevention and preparedness event, which last year involved 25 Island neighborhoods. The goal is to encourage connectedness among neighbors, police and fire. Meet your police department, participate in flashlight walks, block parties and cookouts. There will be plenty of activities for children. Want to register your neighborhood?

Contact Officer Franklin at 275-7905 or jennifer.franklin@mercergov.org.

MERCER ISLAND ARTS COUNCIL: There is always something new from Island artists at the wCommunity and Events Center. Through July 25, enjoy works by Marianne Bond and Helen Schwedenberg.

July 28 through September 12

October 15 (webinar), 12-1 p.m.

Mercer Island Arts Council Juried Art Show

Workshops are at the Mercer Island Community and Events Center, unless listed otherwise.

Online registration is recommended.

Visit: solarizewa.org/registration.

Artists’ Reception

Thursday, July 31, 6:30 - 8 p.m

MERCER ISLAND FARMERS MARKET:

The Mercer Island Farmers Market may be

Contributed Photo

Judy Whitmer, a local pre-school teacher, coordinates crafts for the Children’s Table every Sunday at the farmers market. Pictured here at the 2014 opening of the market, Whitmer helps kids plant sunflower seeds. as much an Island tradition as Summer Celebration! All summer long on Sundays between 10 a.m. and 3 p.m. Islanders can buy fresh produce, visit food trucks and enjoy a rotating cast of musicians.

Through June, vendors will include artists with products and ornaments for the garden. Market events to look forward to, include:

July 6: It’s berry season. Look for raspberries, strawberries and more!

July 20: This week at the Children’s Table, kids can make lavendar bundles.

August 31: Live performane by Jazz Connection!

New Primary Care Clinic on Mercer Island

Affordable concierge medicine

8015 SE 28th Street #310 • Mercer Island 98040 Robert Goode, MD 206-898-2416 www.lakewapc.com

98040 | 2014 ISLAND SUMMER

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Tech dad designs family board game Island entrepreneur stirs learning, technology and fun into adult-friendly kids game

By Mary L. Grady editor@mi-reporter.com

educational and skill-building exercise for his twins.

For that goal, he found a way to include a way to introduce simple For Islander and software entreprogramming into the game. The preneur turned game designer Dan players use ‘code cards’ to instruct Shapiro, it was a matter of finding the turtle what to do, then the para way to play games with his fiveent carries out the instructions. year-old twins.

As a designer and inventor, he He wondered how adults could wanted input from others. play games with their children with"I think this is cool, but does anyout going out of their minds. one else feel the same?" he asked.

"It is so dull," he said.

Shapiro turned Most parents of to Kickstarter young children to put together would heartily some cash and to agree. judge what oth"When you play ers thought of his tic-tac-toe or Canidea. He consulted dyland, you are alwith other game ways trying not to makers, talking win," he said. with the minds His tedium led behind Xbox, Crahim to design a nium, Magic: The game that parents Dan Shapiro , Robot Turtles Gathering and designer could play with even RoboRally. their children — While the idea something with for the game was substance and a decidedly low-tech, Shapiro used bit of learning thrown in. high-tech tools to help finance it, The result is Robot Turtles, a game manufacture it and make it availdistributed by the game maker able to consumers.

ThinkFun. It has become a success He figured he would get $25,000 beyond what Shapiro ever imagfrom crowdfunding. Instead, the ined. amount raised was $631,000 and No, it isn't an interactive online he had preorders for 20,000 games game with animated characters Staff photo - both measures validating his idea. and cool sounds. It is a simple board Dan Shapiro poses with his wife, Leslie, and their five-year-old twins at the new preschool He was shocked. playground at Luther Burbank Park. game to be played at the kitchen To carry out other chores such as table or on the floor in the family manufacturing, sales and distriburoom where players move pieces tion, Shapiro again turned to tech- sharing of ideas across a wide spec- about being the CEO of a startup around on a colorful board laid flat. nology. trum. company. It will be a first-person ac"I wanted to make something that High-tech machines can crank out "The best thing about the Internet count.

I would play, when I am feeling inpieces and playing cards. Retail- and its role in creative endeavors teractive and not terribly creative," ers like Amazon do the logistics in- is that anyone can contribute new he said. His goal was to create someThinkfun is now distributing the game volved in ordering and shipping. ideas," he said. "It used to be small thing distinct from video games nationwide. It’s available for sale at He has sold 25,000 games already. groups that decided what people that usually just involve one player.

Amazon (www.robotturtles.com/amazon) Shapiro is fully immersed in the would see. That left out a huge and will be in all Target stores in the second "With a board game, you play totech world – he is a former Micro- amount of innovation." week of July. Island Books is also carrying gether," he said. soft employee and has run a startup "Robot Turtles." It costs $25.

Will Shapiro make another game?

And Shapiro wanted to make it company, selling it to Google and No, he said. He has other things something even more — a stealth the like. He is a firm believer in the to do. He is going to write a book

“When you play tic-tac-toe or Candyland, you are always trying not to win.”

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98040 | 2014 ISLAND SUMMER

Vaccination rates for Washington state kindergarteners falls Getting kids ready for school means protecting them and their classmates from disease For the 2013-2014 school Even though immunizations year, 83.3 percent of Washingdropped, exemptions rates for ton kindergarteners had all the kindergarteners remained at 4.6 vaccines required for school percent this school year. This entry—a 2.2 percent decrease rate covers medical, personal, from the previous school year. and religious exemptions.

Although most kindergarten“It’s important for parents to ers came to school vaccinated know the consequences when and protected they skip or defrom preventlay vaccines for able diseases, the “Parents need to their kids,” said slight decline in Wiesman. “Chilensure their kids are fully immunized dren who aren’t kids is a concern vaccinated to keep fully immunized them safe.” to state health are likely to be officials.

John Wiesman, Washington State excluded from Secretary of Health school during “Parents need an outbreak, to ensure their they may kids are vaccibecome seriously ill and risk nated to keep them safe,” said death, and may get someone Secretary of Health John Wiessick who’s unable to get vacciman. nated.”

It’s unclear why immunization Washington provides all reccoverage rate dropped, as rates ommended vaccines at no cost for the previous two years had for kids through age 18, availsteadily increased. The Departable from health care providers ment of Health is looking at across the state. Providers may some possible contributing factors, such as how schools de- charge an office-visit fee, but a family that can’t afford to pay termine and report a student’s can ask that the administration immunization status. fee be waived.

The rates for each individual vaccine required for school entry also dropped. Most conFor help finding a health care cerning is drops in the whoopprovider or an immunization clining cough and measles vaccine ic, call your local health agency, rates—2.1 and 1.9 percent, visit the Parent Help123 resource respectively. Our state declared finder, or call the Family Health a whooping cough epidemic in Hotline at 1-800-322-2588. The 2012 and had a measles outWashington state Department break this year. Both diseases of Health website (www.doh. are very serious and can spread wa.gov). quickly in schools and child care centers.

Ten tips for parenting teens Parenting a teenager can be an uphill battle.

“Say the right thing and you will open up lines of communication. Say the wrong thing and it could lead to a fight or silent treatment,"says Joani Geltman, child development and parenting expert and author of "A Survival Guide to Parenting Teens: Talking to Your Kids About Sexting, Drinking, Drugs, and Other Things That Freak You Out." Geltman offers her "Top Ten Parenting Tips."

• Encourage teens to think independently.

Restrain yourself from being chief problem solver, so they can make good choices even when you’re not around.

• Try not to ask a zillion questions. You won't get the answers you want anyway. Engage them in a conversation on a neutral topic before you start the interrogation.

• Refrain from going on the "lecture circuit." Model what it means to be a good person so you don't need to tell them.

They will "get it."

• As uncomfortable as it may be, you have to talk about sex.

Do it with honesty, and understanding, not judgment. Talk about your own experiences, especially those moments of which you are the least proud so that they will feel freer to share their questions and worries.

• When it comes to alcohol and drugs, make your house safe.

Again, have honest discussions, sans judgment. Help them to anticipate new situations and

98040 | 2014 ISLAND SUMMER

problem solve about ways to stay safe.

• Don’t rule with an iron fist.

This may have worked when the kids were younger, but teens need to be part of the rule making. Most kids are actually pretty reasonable when given the opportunity to have some control.

• With their input, set limits

with phones, computers and video games.

• Express your appreciation and pride in your teens. Not for the good test scores or grades necessarily, but for moments of kindness and hard work. There’s nothing more important than an out of the blue "you're a good kid, and maybe I don't tell you that enough."

• Find some fun with your teen. Hang out, watch TV, order pizza, go to the driving range, play a video game, listen to music, go get manis and pedis, bake a cake, take the dog for a walk, go shopping -- anything that may give you a moment, maybe just a moment, of sweetness with your kid.

More parenting insights and information about the book can be found at http://joanigeltman. com/.

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