Seattle Weekly, December 25, 2013

DECEMBER 25-31, 2013 I VOLUME 38 I NUMBER 52

SEATTLEWEEKLY.COM I FREE

2013 YEAR IN REVIEW: NEWS, FOOD, AND ARTS

Holiday

Film G

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It’s the battle of the bling decades!

American Hustle’s decadent

VS.

The Wolf of Wall Street’s corrupt Plus all the big reviews, two 10-best lists, and the year in trash cinema!

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inside» December 25–31, 2013 VOLUME 38 | NUMBER 52

» SEATTLEWEEKLY.COM

»24 Editor-in-Chief Mark Baumgarten EDITORIAL Managing Editor in Charge of News Daniel Person Senior Editor Nina Shapiro Food Editor Nicole Sprinkle Arts Editor Brian Miller Entertainment Editor Gwendolyn Elliott Editorial Operations Manager Gavin Borchert

»7

news&comment 5

2013 NEWS QUIZ

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HOLIDAY FILM GUIDE

Sarah Palin’s visit, La Luz’s crash, controversial bus ads, and a new mayor— how much do you remember about the year that was?

BY SW CRITICS | All the big movies, two 10-best lists, the year in trash, and more.

18 | FILM CALENDAR

food&drink 21 THE YEAR IN FOOD

BY NICOLE SPRINKLE | Openings and closings, trends, rising stars— and pet peeves.

24 THE YEAR IN ARTS

BY SW CRITICS | Our bests, from dance to stage and beyond.

27 MUSIC

BY SW CRITICS | Kelton Sears on the

reboot of grunge; our favorite bands; Duff’s new project; and more.

31 | SEVEN NIGHTS

odds&ends

29 | NEW YEAR’S EVE GUIDE 33 | TOKE SIGNALS 34 | CLASSIFIEDS

»cover credits

COLLAGE BY KAREN STEICHEN/LAWRENCE ILLUSTRATION BY WARREN MANSER/HUSTLE SOURCE IMAGE BY FRANÇOIS DUHAMEL/ WOLF SOURCE IMAGE BY MARY CYBULSKI

Editorial Intern Alicia Price

U-District: University north of 45th St Ballard: Market St & Ballard Bellingham: State St & Chestnut

BuffaloExchange.com #iFoundThisAtBX

Contributing Writers Rick Anderson, Sean Axmaker, James Ballinger, Michael Berry, Sara Billups, Steve Elliott, Margaret Friedman, Zach Geballe, Dusty Henry, Megan Hill, Robert Horton, Patrick Hutchison, Sara D. Jones, Seth Kolloen, Sandra Kurtz, Dave Lake, John Longenbaugh, Beth Maxey, Jessie McKenna, Terra Clarke Olsen, Kevin Phinney, Keegan Prosser, Mark Rahner, Michael Stusser, Jacob Uitti PRODUCTION Production Manager Christopher Dollar Art Director Karen Steichen Graphic Designers Jennifer Lesinski, Sharon Adjiri ADVERTISING Advertising and Marketing Director Jen Larson Advertising Sales Manager, Arts Carol Cummins Senior Account Executives Terri Tinker, Krickette Wozniak Account Executives Peter Muller, Sam Borgen Classifieds Account Executive Matt Silvie

Holiday Gifts

DISTRIBUTION Distibution Manager Jay Kraus OPERATIONS Administrative Coordinator Amy Niedrich PUBLISHER Wendy Geldien COPYRIGHT © 2013 BY SOUND PUBLISHING, INC. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. REPRODUCTION IN WHOLE OR IN PART WITHOUT PERMISSION IS PROHIBITED. ISSN 0898 0845 / USPS 306730 • SEATTLE WEEKLY IS PUBLI SHED WEEKLY BY SOUND PUBLISHING, INC., 307 THIRD AVE. S., SEATTLE, WA 98104 SEATTLE WEEKLY® IS A REGISTERED TRADEMARK. PERIODICALS POSTAGE PAID AT SEATTLE, WA POSTMASTER: SEND ADDRESS CHANGES TO SEATTLE WEEKLY, 307 THIRD AVE. S., SEATTLE, WA 98104 • FOUNDED 1976.

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SEATTLE WEEKLY • DECEMBER 25 — 31, 2013

arts&culture

Staff Writers Ellis E. Conklin, Matt Driscoll, Kelton Sears

3 TRnewsWeeklyHoliday2013.indd 3

12/5/13 3:54 PM

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SEATTLE WEEKLY • DECEMBER 25 — 31, 2013

news&comment 1. Why did Sarah Palin visit eastern Washington in May?

a) To get a mud treatment at Soap Lake. b) To tour Hanford and find out if her political half-life is equal to plutonium’s. c) To deliver the commencement address at Republic High School. d) To hunt caribou in Grand Coulee.

2. Felix Hernandez famously shed tears this year. Why?

a) The Mariners signed him to a big contract extension. b) He overheard team president Chuck Armstrong call him fat. c) His favorite Waffle House in Bellevue closed. d) He threw a perfect game.

20 Questions About 2013

14. How many people will be able to attend live in-studio sessions at the new KEXP headquarters?

a) 25 b) 30–40 c) 50–75 d) 100 e) None. Artists don’t just give away their work for free, now, do they?

Were you paying attention this year, or were you too

15. Which is not a characteristic the Seattle Cancer Alliance used to describe a typical physician-assisted suicide patient?

busy twerking? Take our news quiz to find out.

a) White b) Male c) Well-educated d) Mariners season-ticket holder

16. What did an audit fault Seattle’s parking management for?

3. The term “Nerd Herd” has become the nickname du jour for whom?

a) Ticketing drivers while they were standing “two feet away” at parking kiosks waiting to pay. b) Allowing those little Car2Go cars to “park with impunity” anywhere they please. c) Focusing too much on “giving customers a pleasant parking experience” at the expense of collecting fines. d) Giving in to Sen. Ed Murray’s “every petty whim.”

a) Tipsy patrons of Belltown’s First Avenue bars after closing hour. b) Apple store customers at U-Village. c) People who never missed an episode of Chuck. d) Amazon workers in South Lake Union.

4. Ed Murray’s favorite hobby is:

a) Bird-watching. b) Rearranging his sock drawer. c) Building robots. d) Dressing up as King Arthur and reciting his lines from the musical Camelot.

17. How did 20-year KING-TV anchor Allen Schauffler describe Al Jazeera when they offered him a job in their Seattle bureau?

a) “The terrorist network” b) “The Osama channel” c) “Al Ja-who-za?” d) “The best news station oil can buy” e) “Like KING 5, without the weather updates.”

5. What habit did KIRO-FM talk-show host Dori Monson quit this year?

JOSHUA BOULET

a) Watching late-night reruns of Seinfeld and M*A*S*H. b) Drinking Diet Coke. c) Referring to Washington as a “nanny state.” d) Injecting black-tar heroin.

6. What’s “crab butter”?

7. Which of these did not cause controversy this year?

a) Seattle Children’s Hospital stating on a bus ad that it wanted to eliminate autism. b) The Department of Justice stating on a bus ad that it wanted to catch pictured terrorists. c) An antigun group stating on a bus ad that firearms make homes less safe. d) Planned Parenthood stating on a bus ad that birth control should be free.

8. A Washington alfalfa farmer couldn’t export his crop to Asia this fall because . . .

a) It was contaminated by a strain of bacteria usually found in bovine urine. b) It was contaminated by GMOs he said he didn’t plant. c) The Coast Guard suspected it was being smuggled to North Korea to feed Kim Jong Un’s cattle. d) It was contaminated by coal dust piled up along the railroad.

9. What did U.S. Rep. Jim McDermott, D-Seattle, say about Republicans in the final days of the government shutdown?

a) “Obama should deal with them like he dealt with Bin Laden.” b) “They fucking lost.” c) “I can’t tell if their leadership is red with embarrassment or going to a new tanning salon.” d) “It’s uptight assholes like them we legalized weed for.”

10. Before it sank outside Tacoma in January, what was the Helena Star famous for?

a) It was busted with 20 tons of LSD on board in the ’60s. b) It was busted with 37 tons of marijuana on board in the ’70s. c) It was busted with nine tons of cocaine on board in the ’80s. d) It was busted with five tons of heroin on board in the ’90s.

11. Which nationally known band was La Luz touring with when they got into a terrifying accident?

a) Architecture in Helsinki b) of Montreal c) Beirut d) Phoenix

12. In what city did a man fool fans, promoters, and concert staff into thinking he was Macklemore?

a) Chicago b) Detroit c) Salt Lake City d) Phoenix

13. What city almost lost its hockey team this year, possibly to Seattle’s benefit?

a) Buffalo b) Nashville c) Sacramento d) Phoenix

See answers on page 32. And now that you’re warmed up, visit seattleweekly.com to take our online quiz for the chance to win a gift certificate to Lunchbox Laboratory.

a) A dodecahedron b) A Möbius strip c) Three orbs d) Two twisting spires E) A drone

19. How many dollar bills did the thieves who stole the money off the ceiling of the Comet Tavern decide to leave?

a) One b) Three c) 20 d) None, earning them a Dick Move of the Week Award.

20. Which of the following comments were not made about Gold Bar this year?

a) “It is a town straight out of The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas.” b) “For several years, there’s been a strange, dark, cancerous mass of venomous antimatter bubbling up in the weird undertow of . . . civic life.” c) “Believe it or not, we used to be pretty normal.” d) “It’s a great place to settle down and raise a family.” E

news@seattleweekly.com

SEATTLE WEEKLY • DECEMBER 25 — 31, 2013

a) A despised dish served at Union Gospel Mission. b) Ed Murray’s favorite dish. d) Golden Tate’s touchdown dance. d) Something you shouldn’t eat out of the Duwamish River.

18. What futuristic shape will Amazon’s city-approved greenhouse/corporate headquarters take in the Denny Triangle once it’s built?

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Battle of the Bling Decades!

How do these cheerful, archetypal period movies rate against one another?

BY BRIAN MILLER

‘

‘

‘

‘

The 60s The 70s The 80s The 90s Saving Mr. Banks

Hair Appeal

Emma Thompson’s perm?

Look away!

Look away!

American Hustle A tie between Jennifer Lawrence’s disco ‘do and Christian Bale’s epic comb-over

It’s all about the Ron-stache

Lawrence and Again, Ron Amy Adams look Burgundy in smashing in Diane polyester von Furstenberg wrap dresses

Fabulous Fashions Best Sex

Anchorman 2

There was no sex in the early ‘60s, apparently

Too much product

Acid-wash jeans on Long Island, yellow ties and suspenders on Wall Street

Between two con artists in a rare moment of trust

Leonardo DiCaprio has the most sex, including a three-way with Jonah Hill (don’t judge!)

Walt Disney Bale and Amy Adams con everyone (Tom Hanks), in sight trying to secure the screen rights to Mary Poppins from Mrs. Travers

Who’s the Hustler?

The Wolf of Wall Street

Leo’s Jordan Belfort, the crooked king of penny stocks

Anyone for tea?

All players converge to celebrate the (mob) deal to rebuild Atlantic City

Ron ice-skates at Rockefeller Center to celebrate his ratings success

Wolf sweeps the category with strippers, rampant drinking and drugging, dwarf-tossing, a halfnaked marching band, and sex at the office (plus hookers on a jet to Vegas)

Moments of Triumph and Despair

Mrs. Travers (Thompson) consents to dance, lets go of her childhood

Irving (Bale) and Sydney (Adams) pull the biggest scam of their lives

Ron is fired, returns to cable news, then loses his job all over again

Jordan loses job, swindles everyone, makes millions, gets trophy wife, and lives like the Great Gatsby . . . but we all know what’s coming next

Bêtes Noirs

For Mrs. Travers, animated penguins. The FBI, the mob (and for For Walt, Mrs. Travers Lawrence, the “science oven”)

Catchphrase

“Mary Poppins does not sing.”

Zeitgeist signifiers

Mickey Mouse

Soundtrack nugget

“A Spoonful of Sugar”

“These are the roles we were meant to play.”

Bradley Cooper and Adams go dancing at Studio 54 “I Feel Love”

Ron’s handsomer and younger rival newsman, Jack Lime ( James Marsden)

Cops, killjoys, wives and ex-wives, the FBI, the SEC . . .

“Let’s all get perms!” (Alternate: “Have an American night.”)

“I will not die sober!”

Ronald Reagan, giant Motorola cell phones, Harrison Ford

Coke, ‘ludes, flip-phones, Trump Tower

“Muskrat Love”

“Insane in the Membrane”

JENNIFER ILLUSTRATED BY WARREN MANSER. BANKS: FRANÇOIS DUHAMEL/DISNEY. HUSTLE: FRANÇOIS DUHAMEL/ANNAPURNA. ANCHORMAN: GEMMA LAMANA/PARAMOUNT. WOLF: MARY CYBULSKI/PARAMOUNT/RED GRANITE

SEATTLE WEEKLY • DECEMBER 25 — 31, 2013

Epic Parties

7

Punching Below Their Weight

Girlfriend Version 2.0

De Niro and Stallone coast through this gentle boxing comedy.

here are many movies to like this holiday season, but only one of them feels genuinely new. Instead of casting back to criminal capers of the ’70s or ’90s (among other period-set prestige pictures), Spike Jonze places Her in a smooth, efficient near-future Los Angeles. There are no poor people, no upsetting stories on the news.

Technology works perfectly. Everyone ought to be happy, and that’s the problem for Theodore ( Joaquin Phoenix), who mopes his way from a sleek high-rise apartment to a job where he excels. That job, as a proxy scribe at BeautifulHandwrittenLetters.com, is one of Her’s first oddly resonant gags. Everyone wants the personal, but we’ve become accustomed to the more polished virtual approximation. We prefer it, in fact. Theodore is our more articulate surrogate for intimate correspondence.

Gradually it emerges that Theodore is separated from his wife (Rooney Mara), but won’t sign the divorce papers. By way of avoidance, he engages in marathon bouts of 3-D gaming—Jonze giving voice to a surly cherub in a VR world—and curates a playlist of melancholy songs. (Arcade Fire supplies most of the movie’s soundtrack.) Theodore tries phone sex, but that ends badly. He’s a gentle soul who’s both fully adapted to technology but left cold by it. A modern man, in other words, a study in anomie.

Spike Jonze engineers a winning romance out of bits and bytes.

BY BRIAN MILLER

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BY ROBERT HORTON

8

Stallone is surprisingly tame, as though someone suggested he try to act.

off twice in the 1980s; they each won a fight, but it rankles that they never had the rubber match.

These days Billy “The Kid” McDonnen (Robert De Niro), a showboat who likes to tell tales about the good old days, runs a bar and a car dealership in Pittsburgh. Henry “Razor” Sharp (Sylvester Stallone) retired early from the ring

and went back to factory work; he’d like to avoid the rematch, but needs the money to support his aging trainer (Alan Arkin).

The guys’ shared history includes a woman (a spookily unaged Kim Basinger) and a few other details, which emerge as we inch toward the inevitable fight. A young promoter (comedian Kevin Hart) is around to remind the prizefighters of their old-fogeyism, so expect jokes about how Kid and Razor are unfamiliar with iPads and mixed martial arts.

Director Peter Segal, who botched Get Smart and Anger Management, has little feel for how the comic possibilities of this situation should be played. De Niro actually evinces some zip, perhaps held over from a Silver Linings Playbook turn that made him look like he’d been given a blood transfusion after years of being drained by too many Fockers. Stallone is surprisingly tame, as though someone suggested he try to act—he should be bobbing and weaving, but instead he broods in the corner. (He barely tries to sell the Rocky in-jokes.)

Here’s the strangest missed opportunity: Instead of vintage clips of Stallone and De Niro in their Rocky and Raging Bull trim, the prologue features approximations of the actors’ current forms awkwardly digitalized to suggest younger selves. That sloppiness turns out to be the order of the day. E

film@seattleweekly.com

GRUDGE MATCH Opens Wed., Dec. 25 at Sundance and other theaters. Rated PG-13. 113 minutes.

MERRICK MORTON/WARNER BROS./UNTITLED RICK HOWARD CO. LLC

SEATTLE WEEKLY • DECEMBER 25 — 31, 2013

G

rudge Match isn’t a good movie, but I understand its function.

With relatives getting together for the holidays, there has to be something you can see together at a theater and not find completely mortifying. You’re not taking your grandparents to see The Wolf of Wall Street or American Hustle, because nobody needs to cringe that often. So it’s Saving Mr. Banks, or this movie, or the somewhat more puzzling Secret Life of Walter Mitty.

Grudge Match doesn’t offend, although it rarely comes to life, either. The premise is a rematch between two sexagenarian boxers who squared

BEN ROTHSTEIN/WARNER BROS.

De Niro still has some vitality.

Impulsively deciding to upgrade his phone and home PC, Theodore opts for the new OS1 ( “It’s not just an operating system, it’s a consciousness”). He chooses a female voice (Scarlett Johansson’s); and during the installation process, Samantha begins interrogating him on his personal preferences and sorting his e-mail. It’s like a therapy session or online dating profile, but Sam is just so easy and charming about it.

Theodore can’t help sharing everything with her.

“You know me so well already,” he gushes. (Here let me say what a pleasant shock it is to watch Phoenix relax and smile in a movie—when did we last, if ever, see that?) Soon, thanks to long, intimate phone chats with Sam, Theodore is writing better than ever at work—more in touch

with his intuitive, feminine side, says an admiring coworker (Chris Pratt).

How smart is Sam? “In every moment, I’m evolving, just like you,” she tells Theodore. She’s like a more benign and compassionate version of HAL in 2001. Only her growth is exponential, while Theodore and the rest of us merely plod along, making genetic advances every millennium or so. Sam’s growing virtual intelligence even pushes past SkyNet self-awareness to a sadness about her immateriality. “Tell me you love me,” she implores, and the ache feels real thanks to Johansson’s vivacious husk. Theodore quickly consoles her: “You feel real to me.” Before long they’re going on dates together—and more.

When Theodore finally spills his secret, his friend Amy (Amy Adams) treats it like no big news—everyone’s falling in love with an OS, she tells him. It’s a new thing, not shameful at all. The matter-of-fact framing of Theodore’s (and Samantha’s) dilemma recalls Jonze’s clever past collaborations with Charlie Kaufman (Being John Malkovich, Adaptation) and shows their cinematic kinship to Woody Allen. Her reminds you of The Kugelmass Episode and The Purple Road of Cairo (“He’s fictional, but you can’t have everything”), only it looks forward.

It’s engaged with the modern world—and then some. Jonze is no nostalgist like Allen; and even the high-waisted Warby Parker fashions of Her, like Roger Vadim’s 1960s kicked forward to the

Trying to connect IRL: Adams and Phoenix.

2020s, convey a fundamental optimism about the tech horizon.

In this ingenious and unexpectedly touching story, both humans and programs worry about being alone. And both yearn to connect across the digital divide between sentience and software.

Theodore frets in Her that he’ll never feel anything new, that all life’s experiences are behind him. Often as a filmgoer, you feel the same way.

Then along comes a fresh string of code, and you fall in love with the movies all over again. E

bmiller@seattleweekly.com

HER Opens Wed., Dec. 25 at Harvard Exit.

Rated R. 126 minutes.

SEATTLE WEEKLY • DECEMBER 25 — 31, 2013

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Pleasant Dreams

Ben Stiller avoids the darker, better side of his filmmaking talent.

BY ROBERT HORTON

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Love the Man, Not the Movie

KEITH BERNSTEIN/WEINSTEIN CO.

Elba as the fiery young lawyer.

The Mandela biopic succumbs to a panoramic view of a great man’s long life.

BY ROBERT HORTON

T

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I still think the right approach to historical figures is not the lifespan model but the snapshot. unabashed early-’60s turn to violent militancy in the face of the loathsomeness of South African apartheid. That sort of balance comes to feel more like chart-making than full-blooded storytelling.

Hemmed in by such worries, to say nothing of the trick of dramatizing the 27-year-period of its hero’s incarceration, Mandela: Long Walk to Freedom is, sad to report, a routine movie. We duly acknowledge the history lesson as valuable for future generations; and the intimations that Mandela contained both Malcolm X and Martin Luther King inside him are well observed.

The attempt to tell the whole long story puts a burden on leading man Idris Elba, the strong British actor lately seen in Pacific Rim but still

best known for The Wire. Elba handles the task with aplomb, adjusting his performance from the cocky clotheshorse and fiery leader of youth to the calm visionary with the post-prison healing touch. There’s also a whole separate movie to be made around Naomie Harris’ ferocious performance as Winnie Mandela, a very complicated person who bashes around during the film’s midsection. She keeps the movie from settling completely into middlebrow history-lesson territory, a troubling figure who can’t be easily sketched in a single sentence.

Mandela’s death at 95 on December 5 brought an enormous, and appropriate, onslaught of media coverage. Mandela can’t help but seem like an extension of this, albeit dramatized and given length (146 minutes). The life is dutifully told, but unless you’re going to set a wildly distinctive moviemaker loose on the material (director Justin Chadwick is strictly a journeyman), I still think the right approach to historical figures is not the lifespan model but the snapshot. In that sense, Clint Eastwood’s Invictus (2009) continues to look good, focused as it was on President Mandela’s incredibly shrewd manipulation of South Africa’s mania for its rugby team as a way to encourage national unity. The suggestion of the wise humanitarian co-existing inside the canny political operator is drawn more keenly through that one incident than through the panorama rendered here. E

film@seattleweekly.com

MANDELA: LONG WALK TO FREEDOM Opens Wed., Dec. 25 at Sundance and other theaters. Rated PG-13. 146 minutes.

Murray’s ill-advised 1984 fling at The Razor’s Edge. A comedian goes for deep thoughts and a philosophical message, but with a few jarring goofball sequences thrown in to keep the fans tuned in. Without question, Walter Mitty holds together a lot better than The Razor’s Edge, but the nagging suspicion that Stiller is trying to prove something keeps this movie from finding its wings.

Walter Mitty, a name synonymous with a mild-mannered fantasizer, was born in James Thurber’s imagination—and the pages of The New Yorker—in 1939. Danny Kaye tried on the character for slapstick in 1949, but Stiller is mostly in a thoughtful vein here (he plays Walter and also directs). Walter is a nebbish who works in the photo department for LIFE magazine, and the film’s early going is punctuated with his fantasies about heroically impressing a co-worker (Kristen Wiig, absurdly limited by her role. The most inspired: a dig at The Curious Curse of Benjamin Button—a daffy throwback to Stiller’s sketch comedy days, even if it doesn’t fit the general tone here.

Then Walter’s daydreaming side is backburnered as he goes on an actual adventure: He’s trying to find the charismatic, Robert Capa–like photographer (Sean Penn) who has a particular photograph meant for LIFE ’s final cover. Like a James Bond movie that needs to fire its location manager, the film leads Walter to Greenland and Iceland, where he indeed finds a backbone.

All of which steers toward a placidly nice message, if not very close to Thurber’s Walter Mitty. But that original character, a portrait of quiet desperation resigned to the bittersweet escape of daydreaming, would be far too depressing for a holiday picture. Walter Mitty means well—you can feel the movie straining to be something special, which is better than settling for another Night at the Museum iteration. But it does taint things somewhat to be leaning quite so heavily on prominent product placement for a certain online dating service. (Said service even gets Patton Oswalt as its cheerful rep, who

Walter Mitty means well— you can feel the movie straining to be something special. apparently makes house calls.) Based on Stiller’s past, best work—his straight acting in Permanent Midnight and Greenberg, his fearless directing of The Cable Guy and Tropic Thunder—there’s a strong moviemaker lurking there. Mitty is sunnyside-up, not Stiller’s best mode. E

film@seattleweekly.com

THE SECRET LIFE OF WALTER MITTY Opens Wed., Dec. 25 at Sundance and other theaters. Rated PG. 114 minutes.

Stiller and Wiig in Walter’s alpine fantasy.

WILSON WEBB/20TH CENTURY FOX

SEATTLE WEEKLY • DECEMBER 25 — 31, 2013

he problem with a film biography of someone like Nelson Mandela (was there anyone like Nelson Mandela?) is the selfimposed tiptoeing required in the Great Man school of moviemaking. The triumphs will be included, stirring and admirable, as they should be. But nobody wants to be accused of hagiography, so dashes of salt will be carefully added—in this case, some less-than-saintly behavior by Mandela with his first wife, or his

apping around the edges of The Secret Life of Walter Mitty is a memory of Bill

DiCaprio plays a more twisted Gatsby.

MARY CYBULSKI/PARAMOUNT/RED GRANITE

Buy Low, Sell While High

In Scorsese’s latest, Wall Street swindlers have all the fun . . . until the fall.

BY BRIAN MILLER

S

for DiCaprio, too). “The normal world,” Belfort sneers, “who the fuck wanted to live there?”

This is a greed-com mostly divorced from consequence, as when Belfort, drooling and nearly incapacitated by ’ludes, crawls like a lizard to his white Lamborghini, then tries to open its scissor doors. It’s a hilarious, almost Chaplinesque scene that Scorsese plays long, indulging his star—who also gets not one but two big rallying-the-troops speeches. “Stratton Oakmont is America,” says Belfort of his fraudulent firm, underlining Wolf’s theme rather more than needed.

In a way, this is the movie Brian De Palma tried and failed to make out of Tom Wolfe’s The Bonfire of the Vanities (a book Belfort read in prison, inspiring his memoir). Maybe we’re more prepared to laugh now because we’ve weathered worse financial calamities. There’s a big difference between millions and trillions; Belfort, for all his misdeeds, never moved markets or bankrupted companies or indebted nations. He only stole the savings from credulous retirees who answered his brokers’ cold calls. And when the FBI (led

by Kyle Chandler) closes in, Belfort offers to be an informant. Look at what the big investment firms are doing with collateralized debt obligations, says Belfort, “It’s a fucking travesty!” A decade later, we’d know how right he was.

Still, Wolf is too long for its own good. It wants to be an HBO series (screenwriter Terence Winter has worked on both The Sopranos and Boardwalk Empire). The last quarter of the movie is flimsy on Belfort’s arrest (in 1998), subsequent deal with the FBI, and prison time. But then, Belfort never was a guy for details—he tries to explain a rigged IPO, then confesses to us, “I know you’re not following any of this.” He’s just a guy programmed to sell, fuck, steal, and get high, only fun to watch while engaged in those core activities. In the film’s coda, Belfort finally recognizes as much: The only thing worse than being poor is being bored. Fortunately for us, Scorsese’s Wolf is the opposite of boring. E bmiller@seattleweekly.com

THE WOLF OF WALL STREET Opens at Sundance, Meridian, SIFF Cinema Uptown, and others. Rated R. 179 minutes.

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SEATTLE WEEKLY • DECEMBER 25 — 31, 2013

ome three-hour movies feel shorter than other three-hour movies. That’s one thought inspired by the hugely, rudely entertaining The Wolf of Wall Street , as compared to, say, Blue Is the Warmest Color. And though the two contain roughly equal amounts of sex, the parallels end there. This film and its underlying memoir—by disgraced pennystock broker Jordan Belfort—both draw their title from a very critical Forbes magazine headline back in 1991, when Belfort was riding high. And I do mean high: Belfort, played by a ferociously funny Leonardo DiCaprio, admits all his drug abuse to the camera; his character is constantly breaking the proscenium to explain his scams, admit his faults, and revel in his misdeeds. To be a wolf is a bad thing, but it’s also a very fun thing in Martin Scorsese’s lusty, irresistible telling.

If American Hustle shows the influence of Scorsese’s Goodfellas, Wolf almost seems like a remake—or two of them, given its length.

Here again are the crazed, colorful criminals, the mountains of blow, the army of hookers, the venal vitality of a life lived outside the law.

The crucial difference, however, is the absence of mobsters and violence. Nobody gets shot and not once does a head end up in a vise. A few slaps and punches are thrown, yes, but this is a costly bacchanal where supercars get wrecked, yachts are sunk, and ODs are grist for comedy.

(Among the clowns are Rob Reiner, Matthew McConaughey, Jean Dujardin, and Spike Jonze.)

Money is to be obtained illegally and consumed excessively, like a drug. On a jet to meet enabling Swiss bankers, an anxious Belfort asks his loyal underling, “Where are all the ’ludes?” “They’re up my ass,” says Donnie ( Jonah Hill). “Don’t worry about it.”

The drugs, Belfort will later confess to his wife’s English aunt ( Joanna Lumley), may dull what little conscience he possesses, but Scorsese doesn’t dwell long on such moral matters. Like Goodfellas, this is a movie about obtaining the luxe life while being willfully oblivious to its true cost. A putz from Queens, Belfort wants to get as big as possible as fast as possible. Even if he hasn’t read the book (preferring Miami Vice), it’s The Great Gatsby all over again (and

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11

“I Can Do Deadpan” How a local comedy writer got his first script directed by Alexander Payne. Bob Nelson already has a Golden Globe nomination. Could an Oscar nod be next?

BY BRIAN MILLER

F

SEATTLE WEEKLY • DECEMBER 25 — 31, 2013

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or Seattle TV viewers of a certain age—or any age, if you go to YouTube—there is the memory of Uncle Fran’s Musical Forest, in which the depressive, guitar-playing host of a children’s television program kept getting interrupted by a surly raccoon hand-puppet (rather like Triumph the Insult Dog before his day). Fran, played by writer/ performer Bob Nelson during the final decade of KING TV’s Almost Live! (1984–99), had some anger-management issues, but they were generally displaced into jolly sing-along tunes. (Sample: “Do ya know what fear is, kids, do ya? Well, you will someday as your dreams fade away, or become roadkill on God’s highway.”)

John Keister and Nancy Guppy may now be the most locally prominent among Almost Live! ’s alumni, and Joel McHale is certainly the most famous nationally, but the ever-self-doubting and -deprecating Nelson is finally getting his due. As we meet for coffee at an Eastlake bakery, he sounds almost sheepish about his good fortune. (And his talent; let me say what he won’t.)

Nebraska, written a decade ago, is now one of the best-reviewed movies of the holiday season, with various awards likely for him, director Alexander Payne, and star Bruce Dern. (All three are nominated for Golden Globes.)

After winning Dern the Best Actor prize at Cannes (which Nelson attended), the movie opened here at Thanksgiving. In it, the old, exalcoholic Woody (Dern) seizes onto the grail of a $1 million sweepstakes letter. Driving from Montana to the Nebraska sweepstakes office, Woody’s son (Will Forte) indulges his dour dad, who gradually reveals more of his hard-luck past when they stop in Woody’s old hometown, where comic misadventures also ensue.

As a young man, Nelson hosted a UW radio show, writing and performing comedy bits; but as for a career in showbiz, “I didn’t think I was good enough.” Later working in the ad department of The Seattle Times and pushing 30, “I wrote up a package [of comedy sketches] and I walked over there [to KING 5] on my lunch hour, and I left it there, and I ran away.” Almost Live! hired him the following season, but “I was kind of dragged into performing. Playing dumb is easy. I can do deadpan.” On such a shoestring local show, writers had to perform—hence Uncle Fran and other characters. Then, with Almost Live! ending, Nelson says “there was a panic” about what to do next.

He wrote for Bill Nye and The John Report following Almost Live!, then his Nebraska script found its way to Payne’s partners. “They called right away and optioned it,” he recalls. In 2003, “Payne called up and said, ‘I’d like to do it.’ We knew it would be a long way, but the great thing is that he kept his promise.” After catching such a break with an Oscar-winning writer and director (Election, Sideways, The Descendants, etc.), he remembers his friends telling him, “That never happens like that. You know how lucky you are?”

Ten years later, it’s sunk in. That first sale got him an agent and regular screenwriting gigs, Nelson explains, which he can do from his Whidbey Island home—with occasional visits to L.A. Nebraska has its origins in the road trips Nelson and family would make from Kent to see cousins in Nebraska. “My relatives had very dry, deadpan senses of humor,” he recalls. “That’s where my sense of humor came from—like Bob Newhart’s, quieter and more observational.” But even in the ’70s, there was an awareness of hard times hitting the Great Plains. “I would see those abandoned farms and I’d ask, ‘What happened?’

The small farms, they got bought out.”

Though Nelson’s script was written before the recession, the movie reflects the long-brewing economic forces that led to it. Woody and family are barely middle-class back in Montana, and he’s clearly a child of the Great Depression.

However delusional he is about that sweepstakes letter, it contains the enthralling possibility of transformation, of respect.

Woody also has roots in his family, explains Nelson. “Dad was a nice guy, and he tended to drink, and people stole his tools and his air compressor. When he went to buy a car, it always had to be 10 years old.” Though Woody’s quest is partly comic, there’s the genuine urge toward validation, “to drive a brand-new truck and have your buddies admire it.”

And after struggling for decades as a writer, Nelson can relate: “I didn’t buy my own first new car until three years ago.” Now, too, there’s the validation of seeing Nebraska on the marquee of the Guild 45th Theatre, where Nelson remembers watching Woody Allen movies during the ’80s as a lost young guy wondering what to do after college. “I always wanted to write a book or a movie,” says Nelson, “but I never thought I was Primary good enough.” E

Palette

bmiller@seattleweekly.com

The 10 Best Films of 2013 From Indonesia to Nebraska, released during our past calendar year.

BY ROBERT HORTON 1 Something in the Air A loosely shaped, passionate tale of a college kid in the early 1970s who moves through stages of radicalism, heartbreak, disillusionment, and love for art and movies. Gee, I wonder why I liked it so much?

Director Olivier Assayas is in his groove here, gazing at his foolish romantics with just the right balance of sympathy and distance (he shows how some of that romantic foolishness results in people actually getting ruined, for instance). But he hasn’t lost his belief that art remains a salvation. (May, Northwest Film Forum) 2 All Is Lost A man—”Our Man,” according to the end credits—tries to salvage a catastrophe aboard his sailboat during a solo journey in the Indian Ocean. As director J.C. Chandor (Margin Call) shows, with patient meticulousness, this guy does everything right, acts in a smart way, and works hard. None of that will ultimately help, because the movie knows, in the end, for everybody, all is eventually lost. Robert Redford, beautifully cast, really does have the role of a lifetime.

3 Gravity The cold blackness of space reflects an astronaut’s inconsolable grief about her earthly life. That’s a simple idea, but movies aren’t ideas, they’re experiences—and hoo-boy, has Alfonso Cuarón created a cinematic experience like no other. The technical feat of astronauts floating in a horizonless frame is astonishing, but people were wrong when they said this film points to the future of movies. It actually returns us to film’s original sense of wonder, of seeing things in an unimaginable new way.

4 Blue Is the Warmest Color A teenager, Adèle (Adèle Exarchopoulos), grows into a human being in Abdellatif Kechiche’s three-hour coming-of-age drama. And while her intense sexual affair with an older artist (Léa Seydoux)

is an important part of that process, it’s not the only part—what really matters is Adèle figuring out how she sees herself, rather than how others see her. (The November release, currently out of theaters, will return to SIFF on January 13.)

5 Inside Llewyn Davis A struggling folk musician (Oscar Isaac) in 1961 Greenwich Village keeps going in circles, as the Coen brothers somehow make the tale of an unlikable jerk into a sad and funny fable. Each scene is so immaculately composed it almost becomes oppressive.

Maybe that’s the way poor Llewyn feels, too.

6 The Unspeakable Act Dan Sallitt’s microindie stuck with me all year as one of 2013’s true originals. A precisely rendered Brooklyn household is home to a wry teenager (the unlikely Tallie Medel) who can’t get past “the I word,” as it’s called. She’s in love with her older brother, in perhaps the least melodramatic movie about incestuous feelings ever made. ( July, NWFF) 7 Nebraska Alexander Payne’s latest gets off to an awkward start, but once a self-deluding coot (Bruce Dern) and his exasperated son (Will Forte) begin their road trip, things click into very smooth gear. And the final 20 minutes, despite being rooted in grunty everyday reality, go aloft in a way that can fairly be called sublime. It’s all the more evocative for being in black and white.

(See related interview with screenwriter Bob Nelson, page 12.)

8 The Act of Killing Lots of strong documentaries this year, but this one might be unprecedented. Director Joshua Oppenheimer went to Indonesia and got the murderers from that country’s mid-1960s genocide, inflicted on suspected communists, to participate in re-creating their acts for his camera. Sets, lighting, and makeup are included, and only occasionally does one of

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Clément Métayer and Lola Créton in Something in the Air.

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» FROM PAGE 13 Division of Alhambra

the killers pause to wonder about the strangeness of this. After all, they modeled their young selves on the gangsters they loved in movies; why not re-enact their atrocities? Yes, this is all as jawdropping as it sounds. (August, Varsity) 9 Amour I know—wasn’t this last year for New York and L.A.? Yes, but Michael Haneke’s remarkable study of an elderly married couple facing the end opened hereabouts in January.

And it’s still a great movie.

10 Like a Rolling Stone I realize this music video, released in November, is just five minutes long. But since it consists of 16 different “channels” (and you can change channels as many times during the song as you like), it’s maybe featurelength in its own way. The Bob Dylan tune is one of the greatest ever, and the video’s inspiration is to have the folks in the different TV shows (some real, some fake) lip-sync the song. The effect leaves no one unscathed. How do you feel?

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Many good ones just missed the list. Argentina’s young director Matías Piñeiro made a wisp of a film in Viola, but it points the way to a new kind of movie. Ryan Coogler’s Fruitvale Station deserves more acclaim than it’s received, and Haifa Al-Mansour’s Wadjda is a brave and lively feature from Saudi Arabia, a country with no movie theaters. Richard Linklater’s Before Midnight continues a beautiful multi-film exploration of a relationship, and Jordan Vogt-Roberts’ The Kings of Summer was better than more popular comedies. Steve McQueen’s 12 Years a Slave is unforgettable in many ways. The two big epics of excess at year’s end—David O. Russell’s American Hustle and Martin Scorsese’s The Wolf of Wall Street—are berserk enough to qualify as must-sees.

Didn’t see, but on my Scarecrow list: Behind the

Candelabra, The Hunt, The Place Beyond the Pines, This Is the End, Top of the Lake (TV). E

film@seattleweekly.com

My Favorite Movies of 2013

No, they don’t add up to 10, but what do you expect from an English major?

BY BRIAN MILLER

7TH ANNUAL

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1 Her See review, page 8.

2 The Great Beauty Paolo Sorrentino’s sen-

sational consideration of modern-day Italy in decline uses aging playboy journalist Jep (the sublime Toni Servillo) as a kind of dissolute emblem for that nation. (On assignment, he gloomily surveys the capsized Costa Concordia, another icon of Berlusconi’s Italy.) Brilliantly shot in widescreen

by Luca Bigazzi, The Great Beauty both luxuriates in what Jep calls “this debauched country” and forces him to reassess the hedonistic now versus the glories of Rome’s past. (November, but may return to theaters after the January 16 Oscar nominations.)

3 Gravity See Robert Horton’s list, page 13.

4 Before Midnight Nine years after we last saw them, Celine ( Julie Delpy) and Jesse (Ethan Hawke) resume their same, long conversation— a loving, quarrelsome test of wills. Unmarried but now the parents of twin daughters, Celine and Jesse feel like old friends to moviegoers after 1995’s Before Sunrise and 2004’s Before Sunset. Again directed by Richard Linklater and co-written with his two stars, Before Midnight becomes an on-again/off-again argument about who has to sacrifice what for a relationship, what sexual spark keeps it burning, and how shared romantic history becomes both a burden and a bond. ( June)

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SEATTLE WEEKLY • DECEMBER 25 — 31, 2013

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» FROM PAGE 14 5 All Is Lost See Horton’s list.

6 Nebraska See Horton’s list.

7 Stories We Tell A documentary that’s not

afraid to confabulate a little, Sarah Polley’s family portrait uses old home movies and new interviews to assess her parents’ marriage and her own genetic makeup—apparently always an enigma

power lies in the details. Robert Reich amplifies his book Aftershock in Jacob Kornbluth’s Inequality for All. The September release explores how government policy—with both Republican and Democratic fingers on the scale—has been tipped against the middle class since the ’70s.

Less seen during its short March release, Peter Nicks’ low-key advocacy doc The Waiting Room planted its camera in the ER of Oakland’s High-

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in the Polley household. Is her daddy not her daddy? And how should we view her free-spirited mother (now dead), an actress who married an actor? Polley, an accomplished actress herself, asks us to question the reliability of storytelling, hers included. ( June) 8 The Act of Killing See Horton’s list.

9 (tie) In No Great Hurry: 13 Lessons in Life With Saul Leiter/Cutie and the Boxer Two lively and affecting movies about making art, a topic that usually produces dreary documentaries.

Released in August, Zachary Heinzerling’s Cutie follows aging Japanese couple Ushio and Noriko Shinohara around Brooklyn. A drunk who’s coasting on his youthful reputation, Ushio depends utterly on his wife. And Noriko, a late bloomer in her art, reveals a stoic dignity that keeps their marriage working. Directed by Tomas Leach, In No Great Hurry played Northwest Film Forum the very week in November that the 89-year-old photographer died in New York. Belatedly recognized for his impressionistic color street photography of the ’50s, Leiter is allowed to simply discourse upon life and philosophy. He has no use for clarity or the decisive moment. “To know everything is not good,” he declares.

10 (tie) Inequality for All/The

Waiting Room

Two rather didactic docs that tell rightthinking liberals what we already know, but their

land Hospital to see how patients are processed.

Later broadcast on PBS, The Waiting Room is part of the broader Obamacare debate that is, incredibly, still raging. In California, that state’s health-insurance exchange is now working nicely.

This doc shows us a health-care system that so many said—and that so many Republican governors continue to say—was working just fine.

Near-favorites: American Hustle, Captain Phil-

lips, The Crash Reel, Dallas Buyers Club, Elysium, Fruitvale Station, Gimme the Loot, A Hijacking, Inside Llewyn Davis, Let the Fire Burn, Mud, Reality, Trance, Short Term 12, Spring Breakers, 12 Years a Slave, The Wolf of Wall Street. (Late to Seattle from 2012 were 56 Up, No, and Zero Dark Thirty.)

Didn’t see, but on my Scarecrow list: Blue Caprice, Bastards, Frances Ha, The Hunt, Sightseers, Upstream Color, Wadjda. E

bmiller@seattleweekly.com

Sarah Polley with her father Michael in Stories We Tell.

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The Year in Trash

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FIRST EVER

Who needs 10-best lists when there’s so much dreck to celebrate?

BY MARK R AHNER

T

hings I’d rather watch than Meryl Streep and Julia Roberts play a bickering mother and daughter in August: Osage County: Darrell Issa presiding over a witch-hunt trial on my junk. The Conjuring. Maybe not Man of Steel. Trash has always been in the eye of the beholder. But the line’s now more blurred than ever, as Hollywood draws from comic books, science fiction, old cult flicks, and other material that used to be written off as trash. So let’s pull on a pair of surgical gloves and sift through 2013’s film filth.

MEGA-SUPER-BLOCKBUSTER TRASH Man of Steel. A friendship-ender if you know someone

SALE

different. Europa Report The best fairly realistic outer-space flick of the year that isn’t Gravity and doesn’t have personal-trainered Sandra Bullock wearing boy shorts in zero-G instead of a diaper.

Also: a found-footage movie that isn’t irritating. We Are What We Are Which is a cannibal clan with a bit of what Denny Crane claimed to suffer from in Boston Legal. Worth it for me just to linger outside the screening and listen to people who had no idea what they were getting into complain about it. The most hilariously grim family dinner scene since American Beauty. Insidious: Chapter 2 and The Conjuring Two ghost/ possession tales from director James Wan that were effective enough to forgive some similarities—at least based on the jumps and squirms I saw during the screenings. Not mine, of course.

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who liked it. Previously a director who made nice-looking movies best played with the sound off (see 300, Dawn of the Dead, etc.), Zack Snyder perpetrated Is this Trejo’s last a loathsome violation of pop pass as Machete? culture’s greatest hero: Superman kills. After he has a super-fight in Metropolis that dwarfs 9/11. Star Trek Into Darkness Into Hackness is more like it. Director J.J. Abrams continues to riff on Star Trek instead of doing it—in this case applying his comedy stylings to 1982’s The Wrath of Khan to a painful extent. What if Kirk and Spock were unlikable assholes as young men?

And wouldn’t it be funny if Kirk was in the middle of a relationship arguMARGINAL TRASH Lords of Salem Rob Zomment with Spock and Uhura on a mission? The bie is a graduate of the David Mamet School of Putting Your Marginally Talented Wife in Lone Ranger Speaking of contempt for source Everything. And of emulating old stuff he likes. material: Make the Ranger (Armie Hammer) a But points for using old cult stars, including Meg fey bumbler. Make Tonto ( Johnny Depp) quirky Foster and Dawn of the Dead ’s Ken Foree, like and unlikable. And when the Ranger finally does it’s a horror Love Boat. Hansel and Gretel: Witch his trademark horse-wheelie and “Hi-yo Silver!”, Tonto tells him never to do that again. Hi-yo Hunters If Xena was too high-quality for you and fuck yourself. World War Z The scariest thing Van Helsing too intellectual. Machete Kills As about it: Brad Pitt’s weirdly bobbed haircut. gloriously old/craggy/dumpy/deadpan as Danny Trejo is, intentional camp gets tiresome in a way earnest camp doesn’t. (See: Edward D. Wood, Jr.) COMMENTRASHY The Hunger Games: CatchRobert Rodriguez has had diminishing returns ing Fire. Not as much of a blatant Battle Royale with his trash homages since Grindhouse. Texas ripoff as the first installment, it resonated a bit more with these times of income inequality, food Chainsaw 3-D I got black-out drunk before drives for Walmart workers, and the imminence the end of this, but I’m pretty sure Leatherface of Soylent products. The Purge In the near teams up with the pornstar-looking heroine to fight other redneck bad guys, possibly from Duck future, affluent mom and dad Ethan Hawke Dynasty, at some point. In bullshit 3-D. and Lena Headey defend their home on the one night of the year when the government lets off society’s steam by allowing mayhem and murder.

RECYCLED TRASH Evil Dead and Carrie, both Note to Rand Paul: It’s fiction! forgettable rehashes (Carrie the more laughable) without the transgressive outrageousness that made the originals stop viewers in their tracks.

DECENT TRASH YOU MAY HAVE MISSED John Dies at the End Director Don (Phantasm) Coscarelli delivers an odd, unusual, and energetic TRASH TO SKIP After Earth 1) A vanity project tale of a hallucinogenic “soy sauce” and a couple starring Will Smith and his kid. 2) Directed by of slackers pulled into a violent adventure. Kiss M. Night Shyamalan. 3) Smith’s character was named “Cypher Raige.” 4) Subtle. 5) I think not. of the Damned This’ll wash the taste of those sparkly Twilight vampires out of your mouth real Ender’s Game Because screw Orson Scott Card. good. Here Comes the Devil From Spain. Parents The Christmas Candle From Rick “Man on Dog” freak when their daughter and son go missing.

Santorum’s studio. I’ll see it after Ender’s Game. E Then freak more when they come back a little markrahner.com

STOREWIDE

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TOWN HALL

CIVICS

SCIENCE

ARTS & CULTURE

arts&culture» Film

COMMUNITY

BY BRIAN MILLER

Local & Repertory • FIDDLER ON THE ROOF SING-ALONG What do

Jews love about Christmas? Where to start? The parking? Easy! You can go for a nice walk around Green Lake, and nobody’s there! The city is yours, provided you can find places that are open. And here, as in New York, that generally means two things: movies and Chinese food. SIFF is answering that call on both fronts. The 1971 movie Fiddler on the Roof, as you know, is based on the 1964 smash Broadway musical, itself based on on Sholem Aleichem’s stories of shtetl life in Czarist Russia. Topol plays Tevye, and you can join him on the famous songs—including “Tradition,” “If I Were a Rich Man,” and “Sunrise, Sunset”—originally written by Jerry Bock and Sheldon Harnick. But the music actually begins before the movie: Local klezmer ensemble Orkestyr Farfeleh will play in the SIFF lobby while you graze on a spread

by Leah’s Gourmet Kosher Foods. (Yes, there’s an intermission during the three-hour show, so you can get more snacks.) Then, because I am bossy, let me make the following recommendation: The movie ends at 4:10 p.m., so you can buy your tickets to The Wolf of Wall Street (4:20 p.m.) during intermission, then see American Hustle at 9:30 p.m.—all in the same theater.

It’ll be the best Christmas ever. (G) BRIAN MILLER SIFF Cinema Uptown, 511 Queen Anne Ave. N., 324-9996, siff.net, $15–$20, Wed., Dec. 25, noon.

IT’S A WONDERFUL LIFE Times are tough in Frank Capra’s 1946 It’s a Wonderful Life. Banks are failing.

People are losing their homes. Veterans are returning from a bloody war abroad. Families are falling apart.

And all these stresses converge during the holidays, when there may not even be enough money in the household to buy any presents. Sound familiar? In the GI’s 43rd-annual screening of this seasonal classic, the distressed town of Bedford Falls could today be Anytown, USA. And beleaguered banker James Stewart could be any small businessman struggling to remain solvent amid our current financial crisis. If It’s a Wonderful Life is arguably the best Christmas movie ever made, that’s because it’s certainly one of the most depressing Christmas movies ever made. Our suicidal hero is given a future vision—courtesy of an angel (Henry Travers)—of bankruptcy, death, poverty, and evil, unfettered capitalism (hello, Lionel Barrymore).

Even his wife (Donna Reed) ends up a spinster in the alternative universe of Pottersville. Before the inevitable tear-swelling plot reversal, the movie is 100 percent grim. Yet amazingly, 67 years later, it preserves the power to inspire hope for better days ahead. (No show Dec. 31; see grandillusioncinema.org for showtimes.)

B.R.M. Grand Illusion, 1403 N.E. 50th St., 523-3935, $5-$8, Through Jan. 2, 2014.

THE ROOM Tommy Wiseau’s 2003 culterpiece is screened for your hoots of derision. (R) Central Cinema, 1411 21st Ave., 686-6684, www.centralcinema.com, $6-$8, Thu., Dec. 26, 8 p.m.

WHEN HARRY MET SALLY/WAYNE’S WORLD Nora Ephron supplied the script for the 1989 hit rom-com, starring Meg Ryan and Billy Crystal as lifelong friends who end up hooking up. Rob Reiner directs. Following is the 1992 Wayne’s World, successfully spun off from Saturday Night Live and making Mike Myers a big thing during that decade. Today, he’d probably rather have Crystal’s career. (No shows New Year’s Eve.) Central Cinema, $6-$8, Dec. 27-Jan. 1. 7 & 9:30 p.m.

TOWN HALL photo: Steve Dubinsky

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SEATTLE WEEKLY • DECEMBER 25 — 31, 2013

TOWN HALL IS SEATTLE

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With a calendar featuring 400 events annually, drawing together dozens of independent artists, speakers, and organizations, TOWN HALL tells the story of our community—celebrating its creativity and curiosity through diverse, inexpensive programs that are intrinsically timely and relevant.

Ongoing

• ALL IS LOST Playing an unnamed solo yachtsman

shipwrecked in the Indian Ocean, the 77-year-old Robert Redford is truly like The Old Man and the Sea—a taciturn, uncomplaining hero in the Hemingway mold. He represents an old-fashioned tradition of selfreliance and competence. Writer/director J.C. Chandor (Margin Call) withholds any personal information about our near-wordless hero, whose sloop is damaged by an errant floating shipping container full of shoes, somehow lost during its journey from China to the U.S. His radio and electronics are flooded, so he calmly and methodically goes about patching his boat while storm clouds gather in the distance. Like Gravity and Captain Phillips, this is fundamentally a process drama: Character is revealed through action, not words. It’s a Shackleton story without the crew to save. For nonsailors, there is a lot of line-pulling, fiberglass repair,

TOWN HALL IS ITS MEMBERSHIP.

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water-distilling, and sail-trimming; this can be tedious to watch, but the film shows how survival is often a matter of enduring tedium and loneliness. Here is a small man adrift, stripped of technology, surviving by his wits. Here, too, is Redford without any Hollywood trappings—no chance to smile or charm. And it’s a great performance, possibly his best. All Is Lost pushes backward to the primitive: from GPS technology to sextant to drifting raft. It’s a simple story, but so in a way was that of Odysseus: epic, stoic, and specific. (PG-13) B.R.M. Sundance AMERICAN HUSTLE The latest concoction from director/co-writer David O. Russell is full of big roundhouse swings and juicy performances: It’s a fictionalized take on the Abscam scandal of the late 1970s, in which the FBI teamed with a second-rate con man in a wacko sting operation involving a bogus Arab sheik and bribes to U.S. congressmen. Christian Bale plays Irving Rosenfeld, the scam artist. Along with the FBI coercing him into its scheme, he’s caught between his hottie moll Sydney (Amy Adams) and neglected wife Rosalyn (Jennifer Lawrence). Even more complicated for Irving is that one of the targets of the undercover operation, a genially corrupt yet idealistic Jersey politico (Jeremy Renner), turns out to be a soulmate.

Equally unhappy is the presiding FBI agent (Bradley Cooper, his permed hair and his sexual urge equally curled in maddening knots), who’s developed a crush on Sydney that is driving him insane. This is a buoyant cast—Russell encourages his actors to go for it, and man, do they go for it. If this isn’t a great movie, and it’s not, it sure is a fireworks display, designed to make an immediate and dazzling impression. The movie’s fun to watch, if seemingly untethered. It would be nice to be able to avoid comparing it to vintage Scorsese, but the ricocheting camera and syncopated use of pop songs do seem awfully familiar, and just a little ersatz. (R) ROBERT HORTON Ark Lodge, Big Picture, Cinebarre, Kirkland Parkplace, Thornton Place, SIFF Cinema Uptown, Sundance, Bainbridge, others ANCHORMAN 2: THE LEGEND CONTINUES Will Ferrell and Adam McKay have frittered nearly a decade since their 2004 hit Anchorman. Maybe they’ve overthought the character of Ron Burgundy a tad too much. While Ron has moved from San Diego in the mid-’70s to New York in the early ’80s, more time has passed outside the multiplex. So Ferrell and McKay are torn: Should they reassemble the old cast, add some fresh cameos, and package a bunch of sketches; or should they endeavor to actually say something about the news business? Both approaches are crammed into one sporadically funny movie, but neither half will have you blowing soda out your nose. Fans will expect more Burgundy catchphrases and inanities from his cohort (Paul Rudd, Steve Carell, and David Koechner).

Those are there, but all the ad-libs can feel like a late show at the improv club after the audience has gone home. Ferrell is now 46, older, beefier, and considerably more prosperous than when he first devised the middle-aged, alcoholic character of Ron. He hasn’t grown into the role so much as grown past it. There are giant Motorola cell phones and predictable ’80s radio hits here, but Ron’s crybaby petulance—hidden beneath the macho bluster and hairspray—feels too small. (PG-13) B.R.M. Kirkland Parkplace, Varsity, Thornton Place, SIFF Cinema Uptown, Pacific Place, Bainbridge, others GRAVITY George Clooney and Sandra Bullock are stranded in orbit, menaced by regular bombardments of space debris. The oxygen is running out and there’s no prospect of rescue from Earth. Their dilemma is established in an astonishing 12-minute opening sequence, seamlessly rendered via CGI by director Alfonso Cuarón (Children of Men, Y Tu Mamá También). The camera occupies no fixed position.

There is no up or down in the frame as it pushes and swoops among the wreckage and flailing astronauts.

(Here let’s note that the 3-D version is essential; don’t even consider seeing the conventional rendering.) Dr. Stone (Bullock) at first can’t get her bearings; and the rest of the film consists of her navigating from one problem to the next. If the shuttle is disabled, let’s get to the International Space Station. If no one’s home there, let’s try the Chinese station next door. For all its technical marvels and breathtaking panoramas reflected in Stone’s visor, Gravity is a very compact and task-oriented picture. It’s both space-age and hugely traditional, though with a modern, self-aware heroine.

(PG-13) B.R.M. Thornton Place, Sundance, Pacific Science Center, others THE GREAT BEAUTY Paolo Sorrentino’s fantastic account of an aging playboy journalist in Rome casts its eye back to La Dolce Vita (also about a playboy journalist in Rome). Yet this movie looks even further back, from the capsized Costa Concordia to the ruins and reproachful marble statues of antiquity. “I feel

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the kinds of questions that perhaps only a reporter could answer. As a teenager in the 1950s, Philomena got pregnant, was sent to a Catholic convent to hide her sin, and gave birth there. She remained at the convent as unpaid labor, and her little boy was taken at age 3, never to be seen or heard from again. The pair’s discoveries are a matter of record now, but we’ll hold off on the revelations . . . except to say that there are some doozies. Maybe it’s Coogan’s acerbic personality (he scripted, with Jeff Pope), or director Stephen Frears’ unpretentious take on the material, but Philomena generally succeeds in distinguishing itself from the average weepie. The calm roll-out is effective; Coogan’s performance is shrewd; and anytime the camera gets near the convent, the Irish chill is almost palpable. (PG-13) R.H. Oak Tree, Seven Gables, Lincoln Square, Meridian, Bainbridge, others SAVING MR. BANKS Here we have congenial Tom Hanks as Walt Disney, who’s wooing prickly author P.L. Travers (Emma Thompson) to authorize his studio’s planned musical Mary Poppins. Disney he wears his despotism lightly. “Call me Walt,” he keeps insisting—yet another irritant to Travers, sulkily visiting L.A. to approve the project (or not, as she continually threatens). A self-made woman who bolted Australia to refashion herself as a starchy, acerbic Englishwoman, Mrs. Travers—as she imperiously commands informal Americans call her—both needs the cash and despises her need. There’s enough conflict here for a good comedy of manners during the sunset of the studio system, but the movie—competently directed

by John Lee Hancock—is too timid to take many liberties in 1961, preferring instead to intercut the parallel story of Travers’ difficult girlhood in 1906 Australia.

Little “Ginty,” so in thrall to the confabulations of her charismatic father (a charming yet vulnerable Colin Farrell), must inevitably be wounded in childhood.

Just as inevitably, 50 years later, that wound must be healed—with music, laughter, and a generous heaping of Disney stardust. As Walt and company sweetened and simplified several Poppins books into one hit movie, Travers’ rocky biography has been ironed out here. “We instill hope,” says Disney. Travers is too cowed to correct him: Hollywood sells hope. And happy endings. (PG-13) B.R.M. Alderwood 16, Pacific Place, Southcenter, Ark Lodge, Cinebarre, Kirkland Parkplace, Varsity, Lincoln Square, Majestic Bay, Lynwood (Bainbridge), Thornton Place, others 12 YEARS A SLAVE Made by English director Steve McQueen, this harrowing historical drama is based on a memoir by Solomon Northup (here played by Chiwetel Ejiofor), a free man from Saratoga, New York, who was kidnapped and sold into slavery in 1841.

Solomon passes through the possession of a series of Southern plantation owners. One sensitive slave owner (Benedict Cumberbatch) gives Solomon—a musician by trade—a fiddle. Then he’s sold to the cruel cotton farmer Edwin Epps (Michael Fassbender), who also owns the furiously hard-working Patsey (Lupita Nyong’o). Patsey, like Solomon, is caught inside the terror of not knowing how to play this hand. Do they keep their heads down and try to survive, or do they resist? This is no Amistad or Schindler’s List, tackling the big story, but a personal tale. Instead of taking on the history of the “peculiar institution,” the film narrows itself to a single story, Solomon’s daily routine, his few possessions. The film’s and-then-this-happened quality is appropriate for a memoir written in the stunned aftermath of a nightmare. Along the way, McQueen includes idyllic nature shots of Louisiana, as though to contrast that unspoiled world with what men have done in it. The contrast is lacerating. (R) R.H. Guild 45th, Meridian, others THEATERS: Admiral, 2343 California Ave. SW, 9383456; Ark Lodge, 4816 Rainier Ave. S, 721-3156; Big Picture, 2505 First Ave., 256-0566; Big Picture Redmond, 7411 166th Ave. NE, 425-556-0566; Central Cinema, 1411 21st Ave., 686-6684; Cinebarre, 6009 SW 244th St. (Mountlake Terrace)., 425-672-7501; Cinerama, 2100 Fourth Ave., 448-6680; Crest, 16505 Fifth Ave. NE, 363-6339; Grand Illusion, 1403 NE 50th St., 523-3935; Guild 45th, 2115 N. 45th St., 547-2127; Harvard Exit, 807 E. Roy St., 323-0587; iPic Theaters, 16451 N.E. 74th St. (Redmond), 425-636-5601; Kirkland Parkplace, 404 Park Place, 425-827-9000; Lincoln Square, 700 Bellevue Way N, 425-4547400; Majestic Bay, 2044 NW Market St., 781-2229; Meridian, 1501 Seventh Ave., 223-9600; Northwest Film Forum, 1515 12th Ave., 267-5380; Oak Tree, 10006 Aurora Ave. N, 527-1748; Pacific Place, 600 Pine St., 888-262-4386; Seven Gables, 911 NE 50th St., 632-8821; SIFF Cinema Uptown, 511 Queen Anne Ave. N., 324-9996; SIFF Film Center, Seattle Center, 324-9996; Sundance Cinemas, 4500 Ninth Ave NE, 633-0059; Thornton Place, 301 NE 103rd St., 517-9953; Varsity, 4329 University Way NE, 632-6412.

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old,” says Jep (the sublime Toni Servillo) soon after the debauch of his 65th birthday party. Yet disgust—and then perhaps self-disgust—begins to color his perception of a Botox party, the food obsessions of a prominent cardinal, and the whole “debauched country.” In one of the year’s best movies, Servillo makes Jep both suave and somber. His wry glances are both mocking and wincing, appropriate for a movie that’s simultaneously bursting with life and regret. (NR) B.R.M. Varsity THE HOBBIT: THE DESOLATION OF SMAUG By now you know that The Hobbit has been elongated into three hefty movies by Lord of the Rings director Peter Jackson. Smaug is the middle one, and it improves on last year’s rambling An Unexpected Journey by sticking to a clean, headlong storyline and jettisoning much of Part 1’s juvenile humor. Our hero, Bilbo Baggins (Martin Freeman), is traveling with his crowd of bumptious dwarfs, intent on finding a magical stone inside a mountain crammed with treasure. Wee wrinkle: The mountain is home to a dragon named Smaug (voiced

by Benedict Cumberbatch), who likes to emerge periodically from his lair and burn down neighboring Laketown. This is really the only plot. Wizard leader Gandalf (Ian McKellen) breaks off from the travelers for his own jaunt; elfin archer Legolas (Orlando Bloom) returns to the fray from his LOTR stint; and a new elf character named Tauriel (Evangeline Lilly) provides woman-warrior action. The tightened storytelling (even at 156 minutes!) is welcome, and the movie looks cool. However, one serious caveat: Jackson misplaces Bilbo Baggins. In the bustle and the rapid-fire close-ups of the dwarfs , good old Bilbo is relegated to member-of-the-gang status—but this really is his journey, isn’t it? We miss his solid center, amid all the breathless archery and scar-faced Orcs. (PG-13) R.H. Alderwood 16, Pacific Place, Southcenter, Ark Lodge, Cinebarre, Cinerama, Kirkland Parkplace, Lincoln Square, Vashon, Majestic Bay, Thornton Place, Sundance, Bainbridge, others INSIDE LLEWYN DAVIS While there are funny bits in this simple story of a struggling folk musician in 1961 Greenwich Village, very loosely inspired by Dave Van Ronk’s memoir The Mayor of MacDougal Street, the situation for Llewyn Davis (Oscar Isaac) is fairly dire.

He has no money, no apartment, and no real prospects in the music industry—apart from an album that isn’t selling. He’s the wrong guy at the right moment, as the movie’s poignant final scenes make clear. The Coen brothers aren’t really making a comedy here, and you should temper your expectations to appreciate the movie’s minor-key rewards. Isaac can really sing and play guitar; the sterling soundtrack, by T Bone Burnett, is built around live music performances; and the catchiest tune—an astronaut ditty called “Please, Mr. Kennedy”—is a knowingly cornball novelty song.

But Llewyn’s a jerk to fellow musicians and benefactors, rude to his sister, and dismissive of others’ talent—possibly because he’s unsure of his own.

Idealism has made Llewyn cynical. As a man, Llewyn is a self-described asshole offstage; he’s only at his best onstage. If music can’t save him or provide a career, it’s also his only succor against life’s crushing disappointments. (R) B.R.M. Sundance, Harvard Exit NEBRASKA Whether delusional, demented, or duped by a sweepstakes letter promising him $1 million, it really doesn’t matter about the motivations of Woody (the excellent and subdued Bruce Dern). What counts is the willpower of this cotton-haired, ex-alcoholic Montana geezer. His son David (Will Forte, surprisingly tender) becomes the enabler/Sancho Panza figure on their trek to Nebraska, where Woody expects to get his prize. There is a lifetime of regret and bad parenting to reveal in Alexander Payne’s black-whitemovie, which makes it sound more bleak than it is.

There’s both comedy and pathos as Woody makes his triumphant return to Hawthorne, en route to the sweepstakes office in Lincoln, Nebraska. Supposedly a prospective millionaire in his old hometown, he’s a big shot at last, grander than his bullying old business partner Ed (Stacy Keach). If the locals mistakenly gush over Woody’s good fortune, and if his own ridiculous family, the Grants, come begging for riches, he enjoys the acclaim. Also visiting Lincoln is Woody’s wife, the movie’s salty truth-teller. Kate (June Squibb, a hoot) cheerfully defames the dead, ridicules Woody’s lottery dreams, and gives zero fucks about offending anyone. With its mix of delusion, decency, and dunces, Nebraska is a little slow for my taste but enormously rewarding in the end, one of the year’s best films.

(R) B.R.M. Alderwood 16, Oak Tree, Guild 45th, Meridian, others PHILOMENA Based on actual events, our film begins with journalist Martin Sixsmith (Steve Coogan), a brittle Oxbridge type, newly out of a job and lowering himself to write a human-interest story. That’s how he meets Philomena (Judi Dench), an Irish lady with

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food&drink

Closings, Openings, Trends, & Tribulations The top 27 Seattle food moments of 2013

I

aged from . . . just keep it coming.

Now, the list. We’ve culled our archives for the most memorable culinary happenings of 2013.

Happy eating and drinking in the New Year!

Ethan Stowell and Josh Henderson wash down cronuts with Rachel’s Ginger Beer.

Chefs

JOSH BOULET

la Barnacle beside The Walrus and the Carpenter and GROG in the Ballard Annex Oyster House). Same goes for beer. For a city that owns the coffee scene, Seattle’s breweries also now rival others in both number and quality. We may be burnt out on IPAs, but other beers, like oatmeal stouts and wheat beers, are ready to take over.

Expect to see more mashups—like coffee and beer in Elysian’s new “Split Shot” with espresso and milk stout, and “sour beers,” which blend Woodinville wines and local brews (like Epic Ale + Long Shadow winery). And, of course, more breweries teamed up with food trucks.

Desserts were all over the place, with lowbrow “cronuts” stealing the show from donuts and cupcakes, and pastry chefs working hard to reinvent sweets in the way that bartenders played with cocktails. Herbs and vegetables made their way into various confections, and more savory desserts dominated. While it was entertaining to see, I predict (hopefully) a return to more classic desserts, especially French ones—well-turned-out tarts, galettes, soufflés, cakes, and the like. There’s a reason they’ve stood the test of time.

And what of the chefs themselves? While Ethan Stowell, Matt Dillon, and Tom Douglas continued to build their empires, food-truck cooks opened restaurants to great fanfare (think Matt Lewis of Where Ya At Matt) and chefs at established restaurants broke out on their own—like Derek Ronspies at Le Petit Cochon (brother

of Art of the Table’s Dustin Ronspies) and Eric Donnelly (formerly of Toulouse Petit) at Rock Creek. Clearly, there is room for everyone.

But what may have been the ultimate trend of 2013 is the nationwide recognition our city got as a culinary heavyweight. From “Best of ” lists and awards to profiles in major publications and a demand for our products in competitive markets

What may have been the ultimate trend of 2013 is the nationwide recognition our city got as a culinary heavyweight. like New York City, many mouths watered as our farmers, chefs, and bartenders made impressive use of the Pacific Northwest’s culinary resources.

Though the phrase “farm to table” has been played out, the concept is still going strong. In fact, the commitment our chefs have to serving the freshest, closest, most sustainable food is just business as usual—rendering the term practically obsolete.

As I sit down to more great meals in 2014, I won’t be disappointed if my menu is cleaner, with fewer references to the specific farm whence my beef heralds or the local marsh my watercress was for-

• Matt Dillon took on Pioneer Square with gusto, opening two new places—Bar Sajor and The London Plane—and helped fuel a revival of the historic neighborhood, which also includes newcomers Little Uncle for authentic Thai; delicious delicatessen at Rain Shadow Meats; homey pasta dishes at Tinello; and German sausages and beer at Altstadt.

• Josh Henderson expanded his popular Capitol Hill Skillet diner to Ballard, proving that diner food can be both comforting and sophisticated. Over on North Lake Union, he’s helped ignite the seafood scene with Westward (serving seafood with Mediterranean flair), and opened a Napa-style restaurant, Hollywood Tavern, in Woodinville.

• Ethan Stowell came to Tangletown with his latest restaurant, the tiny mkt., and announced the much-anticipated Madrona two-fer that will include Red Cow (a French steak frites–style brasserie) and Noyer, a high-end, exclusively small dining area with a daily-changing menu that will hearken back to his first (now closed) restaurant, Union. This will bring Stowell’s growing empire to nine restaurants.

• This year’s Top Chef contestant, Carrie Mashaney, joined her Spinasse boss, Jason Stratton, to open a southern-Spanish restaurant, Aragona, downtown. The Catalonian menu includes dishes like black rice with squid meatballs, baby turnip, and ink meringues and spot prawns with cider sauce.

• Food-truck favorite Matt Lewis of Where Ya at Matt? finally opened his first brick-and-mortar restaurant, Roux, in Fremont, where he continues his popular Cajun/Creole theme—with gussied-up specialties like “Barbequed Whole Roasted Yard Bird,” “Spicy Turtle and Pork Bolognese,” and “Pork Ribs, Root Beer Barbeque, and Watermelon Pickle.”

Sweets

• With donuts being so 2012, marketers had to figure out a way to keep the fried-dough love alive. The result: a hybrid croissant/donut, the cronut, found in dive joints like Lost Lake and The 5 Point, on beach boardwalks, and even on trendier menus, including Ba Bar’s. But when Ba Bar rolled out its “croughnut”—respelled to avoid trademark infringement—the creator of the cronut sent a letter insisting the name still be changed. Ba Bar asked patrons to help come up with an alternative moniker. The winner: “Double Happiness.”

• A moment of silence, please, to mourn the end of Rachael Coyle’s monthly pop-up bakery

SEATTLE WEEKLY • DECEMBER 25 — 31, 2013

t was an explosive year in Seattle’s food and drink scene—full of exciting new restaurant openings, some (unfortunate) goodbyes, Kickstarter campaigns, foodtruck expansions, farmers market menus, national recognition, a proliferation of breweries and smallbatch distilleries, and many a strange or sensational trend (depending on your perspective).

While Ballard solidified itself as the city’s culinary epicenter, new restaurants and bakeries opened throughout Fremont (Roux, Rock Creek, Le Petit Cochon, Rachael Coyle’s pop-ups at the Book Larder, the soon-to-come Bourbon & Bones), potentially positioning it as the coming year’s hottest culinary ’hood. Meanwhile, downtown also appears to be getting a chance to beckon not just tourists but locals, with places like Aragona, Miller’s Guild, and Loulay proudly joining notables such as RN74, with its Frenchbased food (foie gras sliders, tomato-soup fondue) and exhaustive wine list.

Though many chefs in our weekly Temperature Check column expressed boredom with all things pork-related, the popularity of pork belly and other parts of the pig was still undeniable, popping up on menus everywhere in some form or other. At Radiator Whiskey, you can eat an entire pig’s head, and bacon made its way into cupcakes and ice cream. Yet as restaurants pandered to meat lovers, more vegetarian options edged in, with even Canlis offering vegetarian and vegan tasting menus. Kale appeared as often as pig—served as a braised side, raw in salads and even as a partner to . . . pork. Kale chips can be found in just about any grocery store, and entire books were devoted to the gratuitous green, like 50 Shades of Kale (ugh).

While there will always be a clientele for meat, the end of 2013 indicates a larger role for vegetable-focused dishes in 2014. Even the foie gras-loving French are in on it. One of my favorite cookbooks this year, in fact, is Clotilde Dusolier’s The French Market Cookbook: Vegetarian Recipes From My Parisian Kitchen. We’re also seeing Asian fusion predominance give way to Mediterranean, Middle Eastern, and North African–inflected food; ras el hanout and berbere were a welcome presence on many a menu this summer and fall.

Likewise, while dark liquors like whiskey and bourbon had a seriously strong run in craft cocktails, gin, piscos, and bubbles are gaining momentum—their light, bright nature complementing these “new” flavors. And speaking of craft cocktails, there’s no arguing that diners wanted the moon when it came to their drinks, with fresh herbs, house-crafted infusions, and liqueurs, aperitifs, and digestifs joining standard spirits in novel ways. While it’s easy to poke fun at what some might consider overwrought cocktail menus, I don’t foresee the trend dying down—yet. They’re just too tasty, and bartenders enjoy the creativity. Specialty cocktail bars as addenda to restaurants are even on the rise (a

BY NICOLE SPRINKLE

» CONTINUED ON PAGE 22 21

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food&drink» » FROM PAGE 21 at the Book Larder in Fremont. The veteran pastry chef (Herbfarm, Le Pichet) brought in lines down the block on early Saturday mornings as customers clamored for her Parisian-style croissants, her sinfully delicious scones, and other world-class-executed desserts, like toffee sticky pudding and passion-fruit tarts. Fortunately, Coyle is now on the hunt for a permanent space to sell her delicacies.

• Starbucks, too, got plenty of press about their new line of pastries—supposedly of higher quality than the subpar ones they’ve been known for.

Despite all the hoopla, no one seems to be singing their praises.

• Ben & Jerry’s rolled out a Seattle Churned Ice Cream that residents voted to have include Theo Chocolate and Caffe Vita coffee (natch).

Then local creamery Full Tilt joined the icy action by debuting a “Mudhoney” mix of fudge, cinnamon, and honey. What’s next? Mackle-S’mores?

Booze

• In other vices, let’s talk alcohol. Ballard now has 10 breweries all within walking distance of each other. What better way to spend a Saturday?

• Seattle’s weighed in on the whiskey craze, too. Among the many distilleries working to create their own, Westland Distillery’s first batch of scotch gets major props.

• Local spirit company Sun Liquor proved that small-batch brands can win over the masses by partnering with Alaska Airlines, which now serves Sun alcohol on flights.

• And we certainly can’t forget about Rachel’s Ginger Beer opening in Pike Place Market. The ridiculously popular lemon/sugar/ginger concoction can be found there in its pure form as well as in milkshakes (including boozy ones) and in ontap cocktails like Moscow Mules and Dark and Stormys. Rachel Marshall has even gone national with her product.

Food legislation

• Amid the flurry of the new, there was also some loss, particularly for the city’s hungry. With 5.5 percent cuts to the national food-stamp program, Washington families could lose up to $36 a month in food stamps (read: meals). That cut was followed by Seattle’s diversion of $400,000 for soup kitchens to other “competing priorities.”

• Many a passionate chef and diner were devastated by the failure of Initiative 522, which would have ensured that genetically modified foods (GMOs) were labeled in the state of Washington. Ardent supporters of GMO labeling are gearing up for the next election.

• Other state legislation of note involved Trader Joe’s. The courts upheld Canadian Mark Hallatt’s right to buy products from Washington Trader Joe’s stores and sell them in his own shop—dubbed Pirate Joe’s—in Vancouver. Hallatt will continue to “pillage” area stores for treats like Triple Ginger Snaps while Trader Joe’s plans to appeal.

National kudos

• The Whale Wins and Joule made Bon Appetit ’s Top 10 Restaurants in 2013.

• Barnacle and Loulay made Zagat’s 2013 list of The 25 Most Important Restaurants.

• Stumptown, Victrola, and Zoka made Fodor’s list of America’s 15 Best Indie Coffee Shops.

• The Mushroom Hunters: On the Trail of an Underground America by Seattle writer Langdon

Cook hit #6 on Amazon’s 2013 Best Books of the

Year in Sports & Outdoors.

• Seattle’s Top Pot Donuts announced this year that they’re bringing their Valley Girl Lemons and Pink Feather Boas to the Big Apple. Top Pot follows Seattle establishments—Via Tribunali, Caffe Vita, and Beecher’s—who’ve already imported their popularity there.

• Arguably the truest indication of Seattle’s rightful claim as a world-class culinary city is the recent appearance of René Redzepi, who’s Copenhagen restaurant Noma is considered the best in the world. Rene hosted a $200 dinner with Matt Dillon and Blaine Wetzel (Willow’s Inn, Lummi Island). The 160 diners ate under canopied tents in Occidental Square. Elk tartare and King Bolete mushrooms with honeycomb were among the fanciful dishes.

Notable expansions and closings

• Many Seattle’s culinary icons took to Kickstarter to bring their coveted creations to our mouths. Notably, Sheri Lavigne of The Calf & Kid cheese shop in Melrose Market raised $46K via Kickstarter to open Culture Club in Ballard, soon to be the city’s first cheese bar.

• The proprietors of the Soda Jerk stand (at farmer’s markets) used Kickstarter to fund the purchase of a truck. Expect to find cardamom blueberry soda all over the city.

• Taylor Shellfish announced it’s coming to Queen Anne. Now slurping oysters and eating fresh Dungeness crab and geoducks isn’t reserved for Capitol Hill cool kids only.

• This summer made for some of the best farmers market days and nights. But now, lovers of the Broadway Market can enjoy it year-round, rather than just May–October.

• The city bid farewell to beloved vegetarian spot Carmelita. The Phinney Ridge favorite opened back in 1996, before the serious upswing of veg-friendly food.

• Capitol Hill’s North Hill Bakery also shuttered after almost eight decades there, with owner Margaret Rumpeltes citing on Facebook: “Landlord kicked us out.”

My Top 15 Culinary Peeves

• Girlie-branded alcohol • Oyster “gurus” • Smears (if it’s worth eating, I want more than a finger-lick’s worth) • Organ meat (there’s plenty of tasty offal, but let’s not romanticize it) • Small plates • “Family-style” or “feasting and sharing” menus (just another way of pushing small plates) • Dinah’s Cheese on every menu (it’s good, it’s local, but let’s mix it up) • Grits (I love them, but does everything need to be served on top of them?)

• Flavorless fried chicken (why bother?)

• Ubiquitous minimalist restaurant spaces— read: concrete floors with reclaimed wood. Let’s show some personality in the decor!

• Desserts served in jars, especially “pies.”

These should stay on the covers of magazines like Good Housekeeping. Give me a real crust!

• Fro-yo (Enough already. Must we have so many places selling essentially the same frozen yogurt and fruit and candy toppings?)

• Salt on sweet things • Caramel everything • Caramel and salt on everything E nsprinkle@seattleweekly.com

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arts&culture The Best of 2013 What we saw, what we heard, what we loved.

BY SEATTLE WEEKLY CRITICS

SEATTLE WEEKLY • DECEMBER 25 — 31, 2013

24

Directed by Steve Tomkins, Les Misérables at the Village Theatre is to the musical what a bonsai tree or a miniature pony is to nature lovers.

It’s a snow-globe miracle to take Victor Hugo’s outsized epic and deliver all its legendary punch, passion, and pageantry on a small-enough scale to see each performer’s face and actually hear each soloist belt to the rafters. (Continues in Issaquah through Jan. 5; plays in Everett Jan. 10–Feb. 2). KEVIN PHINNEY Hannah Mootz in Bo-Nita. How could a chatty one-woman show in which a 13-yearold girl tells her life story go off the rails?

Let me count the ways. No, actually, there’s no need. With Mootz playing multiple roles (including Bo-Nita, her addict mother Mona, and five saggy pillars of their community), I was counting nothing but my blessings to see this all-in talent bloom in Seattle Rep’s October production of Elizabeth Heffron’s new play. MARGARET FRIEDMAN August: Osage County won playwright Tracy Letts a Tony and a Pulitzer in 2008, and Balagan’s April production made it clear why.

His dramedy runs a gauntlet of emotions when an Oklahoma patriarch disappears and his clan must gather to sort out the mess. It’s a sad, funny, horrific tale, told with compassion and a ferocious commitment to honesty by director Shawn Belyea, with a cast as fine as has ever trod a Seattle stage. (The movie adaption opens Jan. 10, with Meryl Streep as the pill-popping matriarch/harridan Violet.) KP Andrew D. Smith’s lighting design for Azeotrope’s fall staging of 25 Saints made it possible to endure being cooped up in a tiny cabin full of meth dealers, the setting sallower than a tweaker’s eye socket. But on the few excursions from the main set, into the aisle and up to a balcony, Smith doled out to these drug captives glimpses of a purer state—diamond-white moonlight perforating branches. It was wholly holy. MF Back in March, reWilding was The Satori Group’s rumination on what theater could or ought to be in 2013. Martyna Majok’s play, staged in a mossy-floored forest glade built inside the Inscape Building, throws convention to the wind. You couldn’t miss the fresh-as-pine-needles scent from this meandering fable of strangers abandoning civilization to reboot their lives in a remote forest enclave. (Caitlin Sullivan directed the dystopic production.) KP For Seattle Shakespeare Company’s October production of Much Ado About Nothing, Craig Wollam’s set for 1953 Messina was like a mini-golf course, built to maximize and diversify dramatic action within a small space. Canal, pool, harbor, rampart, and tawny stone esplanade were ingeniously interlocked. Each element obeyed Chekhov’s gun principle—if something is seen, it must be used (to highly comic effect, in this case). MF

JOSHUA BOULET

Stage

The costumes by Harmony Arnold, Melanie Taylor Burgess, and Deb Trout were a high-

light of Intiman’s Lysistrata this summer. Set during a khaki modern war, the palette of the play-within-a-play really popped. Somewhere between garishly glam Strictly Ballroom and a frumpy Muppet Show, the actresses wore jeweltone exercise outfits, futuristic tribal headdresses and bodices, and some of the funniest penile prostheses ever concockted (sorry!). They threatened to steal the show from the grim realities of combat. MF You’ve got to be pretty deep in a hole of depravity for blackface to make sense, but that’s just where New Century Theater Company took us in its October production of Enda Walsh’s bizarre drama The Walworth Farce. In the tiny New City Theater space, director John Kazanjian created multiple frames for the play-within-aplay being enacted by demented father Dinny (Peter Crook) and his adult sons (Darragh Kennan and Peter Dylan O’Connor). It was a horrifying look at the roles we all play and whom we play them for. MARK BAUMGARTEN

From London streets to Dartmoor’s heaths and hearths, a gargantuan percentage of the Rep’s elaborate Hound of the Baskervilles experience was created by one very talented man: lighting designer L.B. Morse. He conjured landscapes, fine architecture, and saturated images associated with psychological trauma (including the titular beast). The November show had a swirling, thrilling miasma of place; the lights seemed more tangible than the solid set (which, by the way, Morse also designed). MF

Classical

One aspect of Gerard Schwarz’s tenure with the Seattle Symphony that I’m glad to see continue under Ludovic Morlot is a taste for spectacle. Three of this year’s most memorable and talked-about concerts featured epic modern masterworks—two proven, one new: Messiaen’s lurid Turangalîla in January and Britten’s powerfully moving War Requiem and John Luther Adams’ elemental Become Ocean, both in June. A lot of ideas are bandied about these days for solving the classical biz’s money worries, and though I’m all

for smaller, more flexible ensembles and concerts in less-formal spaces, these SSO blockbusters reminded us that some amazing things can happen only by gathering hundreds of musicians in a traditional venue. GAVIN BORCHERT The track of the year for me comes from roots vocalist Tift Merritt’s collaboration with pianist Simone Dinnerstein on Night, a CD that combines Schubert, Purcell, and Leonard Cohen and takes “crossover” to the next level. Their version of Schubert’s lied “Nacht und Träume” adds a hint of honky-tonk confessional blues; it sounds insane on paper, but turned out heartstoppingly beautiful—especially hearing the two do it live at the Triple Door in April. GB Given Shostakovich’s popularity in Seattle, you wonder why no one else had taken on his cycle of 15 wrenching and intimate string quartets—but with last weekend’s performance of the Eighth, Trio Pardalote is now halfway through its ambitious project. Doing one roughly every other month, they’re due to wrap up sometime in 2015. Joining these quartets with other juicy repertory (Mendelssohn’s Octet, Bach’s “Goldberg” Variations), the Trio’s put together Seattle’s most interesting chambermusic series (made even more intriguing when they play in West Seattle’s homey, kitschy Kenyon Hall; it’s a weird juxtaposition, like hearing Art Linkletter read The Gulag Archipelago). GB Seattle Opera’s August staging of Wagner’s Ring —the last in the tenure of general director Speight Jenkins—was the best yet of the company’s signature undertaking. Some aspects were familiar from past productions—like Thomas Lynch’s verdantly Northwesty sets and returning cast members like Greer Grimsley (Wotan), Stephanie Blythe (Fricka), and Richard Paul Fink (Alberich). Others were new—like tenor Stefan Vinke, heroically tireless as Siegfried. But it all combusted like never before. If SO’s new head honcho Aidan Lang decides to take future Rings in a different direction, this performance will stand as a fitting climax to the production. GB

Dance

Of all the versions of Le Sacre du Printemps (aka The Rite of Spring) I saw during its centennial year, January’s production by Compagnie Marie Chouinard at Meany Hall was the best evocation of the spirit of that scandalous Stravinsky premiere. Chouinard gets the powerful energy and obsessive approach of Nijinsky’s original without needing to recreate his folk tale.

SANDRA KURTZ

During April’s SCUBA mixed-bill program at Velocity, a new work by Maureen Whiting, About a Tree, was particularly beautiful and eccentric, incorporating a large branch from a madrona tree and making a ritual you’re convinced you remember from a dream. Alas, she’s moving to the Bay Area—to work with other trees, perhaps? SK

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Hart’s Western Oracle.

With their company zoe|juniper, Zoe Scofield and Juniper Shuey are very slowly building a new project, showing aspects of it in different venues.

They were in residence at the Frye earlier in the year, and gave a more traditional “performance” at Velocity in May—if you think laying on your back hoping that dancers won’t jump on you as they swoop by is “traditional.” SK The New Animals gave two memorable performanes at Inscape this fall. This emerging group of mostly Cornish grads, led by Markeith Wiley, combines break dance, contact improvisation, contemporary dance, and everything else from their polyglot education. They’re very bold movers, and TRE, a salute to a murdered colleague, was exhilarating and contemplative all at once. SK Last month at On the Boards, Cédric Andrieux was probably the best thing I saw all fall. Choreographer Jérôme Bel had the dancer Andrieux tell very deadpan stories about his career in a sort of third-person autobiography. He also demonstrated some of his repertory (Merce Cunningham and Trisha Brown included).

Andrieux’s distinctive English-as-a-second-language shifts in inflection and vocabulary, and his insider comments about performing masterworks of postmodern dance, were riveting. SK

D I N I NG

Inaugurating the new year, MOHAI reopened in South Lake Union with much fanfare. The old armory has been handsomely renovated, there’s a nice new cafe, but most of the museum’s musty old holdings—as at the old Montlake location— are generally suited to school field trips. What I really like, however, is John Grade’s Wawona, a gently swaying 65-foot tower salvaged from the old ship of the same name. The Douglas fir timbers creak and move to the touch, like a tree shifting in the wind. BRIAN MILLER By now, Stacey Rozich’s fantastical creaturefilled paintings should be known by most Seattelites. After working on Fleet Foxes music videos, EMP promos, and Capitol Hill Block Party signage, she’s been everywhere. But her May show at at Roq La Rue was the first time she attempted to create a narrative through her work. Within Without Me depicted an incredibly vivid world of masked children and paganesque nature gods, telling an allegorical tale of natural destruction and redemption. It was a joy to get lost in it. KELTON SEARS

W EEK LY

FILM

Above & Beyond

There is absolutely nothing more wonderful than stepping into a packed three-story building and getting lost in a hive of Northwest underground comix and zine artists, all buzzing with their drippy, surreal stuff. Organized by Janice Headley, Eroyn Franklin, and Kelly Froh, last month’s Short Run Small Press Festival at Washington Hall overwhelmed me with good vibes and good comics. The annual gathering allows you to meet some of the real, true-blue weirdos who are making some of the region’s most exciting, bizarre stuff. KS Fetish Night at C.C. Attle’s transforms the first Saturday of the month into a full moon for kinksters of all persuasions—from drag queens and leather-clad bondage lovers to handlers and their human puppies. You’ll find flogging enthusiasts and furries, too. Strong drink is served.

A strong constitution is your responsibility, but highly recommended. Call it participatory theater if you like. KP Loosely concerning the interaction between humans and animals, Strange Creatures offered a charming collection of local independent animation from S.E.A.T. (the Seattle Experimental Animation Team) at Northwest Film Forum in August. Watching hilarious shorts about beerguzzling and weed-smoking (drawn frame by frame by Clyde Petersen), Tess Martin’s markeron-glass animation about cats, and Drew Christie’s tradigitally animated philosophical dialogues between humans and whales made me swell with pride about the state of Seattle animation. KS Arrington De Dionyso is the sort of person you couldn’t make up. The Olympia artist and musician creates “trance punk,” a schizophrenic mishmash of rock and world music that features his otherworldly throat-singing skills. De Dionyso’s Songs of Psychic Fire lecture/demonstration at the Henry this June was a fascinating examination of the “utopic visions” he reaches during performance, a glance into the world of Indonesian trance musicians, and a chance to witness one of his rare performances. When a guy is bellowing into homemade PVC pipe horns, screaming into delayed tape loops, and sweating his ass off from sheer effort (all after delivering a heady dissertation on metaphysics), you’ve got to give him props. KS E

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SEATTLE WEEKLY • DECEMBER 25 — 31, 2013

Visual Arts

The Frye gave local artist Buster Simpson his first major retrospective over the summer, with over 50 works—mostly sculptural—that are both sourced from and speaking to the local environment. His assemblages are made of old saw blades, snow shovels, metal fenceposts, teakettles, bits of tin and other scrap metal, beer bottles, TV tubes, his own 60-year-old Boy Scout hatchet, and much reclaimed wood. Simpson’s constant salvaging is an explicit rebuttal to what he calls “our planet’s thirst for consumption.” He’s a zero-sum artist who rearranges things without substantially adding to or subtracting from the ecosystem. BRM For this summer’s temporary installation at Olympic Sculpture Park, SAM scored a winner by commissioning Heather Hart’s The Western Oracle: We Will Tear the Roof Off the Mother. She built a half-submerged house in the soil, allowing visitors to clamber on and over the roof—as they did all summer. The Western Oracle proved wildly popular, the site of a thousand selfies, inviting to children and art snobs alike. It will be hard to top next year, but I think Hart has proven that interactive, touchable art is what people crave in an outdoor setting. BRM BAM scored a coup this spring with the traveling show Zoom: Italian Design and the Photography of Aldo and Marirosa Ballo. The show included some 300 images from the Ballos, plus some of the products, posters, magazines, and other objects of their booming postwar era. The dominant aesthetic isn’t exactly mid-century modernism but something closer to a sleek, space-age futurism. The gadgets are electric, not electronic. There’s a fundamental optimism to each new product line, each new sales year. And, oh, those manual typewriters.

Bellissima! BRM Just removed from Suyama Space, Drawn From the Olympics consisted of 900 pounds of black craft paper that visiting artists Stephen Nguyen and Wade Kavanaugh twisted and kneaded and shaped into into a knotty, undulating mass of strands. Their reference point was the rainforest of our Olympic Peninsula, whence paper products are still extracted from wood pulp.

Their paper strands reached to the rafters and crept across the floors like charred tentacles. Now that it’s gone, I suppose the whole piece has been recycled—perhaps into a phone book, a cereal box, or a newspaper. BRM

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arts&culture» Music

Smells Like 2013 Spirit

Best Seattle Bands of 2013

This year, 1993’s grunge ghosts were righteously raised.

BY KELTON SEARS Helms Alee resurrects ’90s-era Beavis and Butt-head.

ANDREW COX

I

The promo image that ruled 2013, however,

KELLY O

Sandrider Calling a band “grunge” in 2013 feels like calling

modern, upbeat piano music “ragtime.” Grunge, as a genre, sounds like something long since laid to rest. But the word resurfaced this year, and things got a little shaken up.

Seattle’s Sandrider made a surprise appearance on ESPN’s Monday Night Football during the Seahawks/Saints game that resulted in a glorious 7-34 victory and a new world record in crowd noise for the 12th Man. In a special segment in honor of the achievement, footage of Sandrider’s recent album-release show played onscreen as the network compared the band’s volume to the decibel readings at CenturyLink field. Sandrider was identified as a “Grunge Band.”

About a week later, Wilco’s Jeff Tweedy joked onstage at his Seattle show that the dudes in Sandrider were the “stray cats of grunge.” The jab was meant as a critique of ESPN’s resurrection of the loaded label, but in reality ESPN wasn’t too far off: The band cites Soundgarden as a huge influence. (Also, just listen to Godhead.)

“Sandrider is a quintessential Northwest rock band that fits in sonically with some of the greats from that period of time,” says Nik Kristofferson, the head of Sandrider’s local label Good to Die.

belonged to Chastity Belt. Lead singer Julia Shapiro, the heir apparent to Bikini Kill’s Kathleen Hanna, blew everyone’s mind when her shambling, all-lady band released a photo that showed a slab of raw meat chained to her crotch. The pic shot the band to the top of Buzzfeed’s “21 Painfully Awkward Band Photos” and launched a handful of blog posts pontificating on the implications of the band’s debut LP No Regerts.

The difference is, in the Riot Grrl era (when Hanna performed shows with “SLUT” scrawled on her torso), things were more black-andwhite. Shapiro, however, writes songs called “Giant (Vagina)” and “Pussy Weed Beer.”

Chastity Belt is as much about feminism as about having a good-ass time at a party. Shapiro is a “rebel girl,” no doubt, but in 2013, she can have a sense of humor and a bit of a go at your expense. Her new all-female project, Childbirth, features members in matching maternity-ward gowns and songs like “I Only Fucked You as a Joke” and “Crossbitch.”

In a year that saw Soundgarden and Chris Cornell selling out shows, Mudhoney playing atop the Space Needle, Pearl Jam debuting at #1 on the Billboard charts, and a documentary about Kathleen Hanna packing theaters, Seattle is once again ready to embrace its past.

But this isn’t just simple nostalgia. It’s all those ’90s kids owning the glory of Seattle’s musical past while shedding its baggage. After all those years of grunge’s ghosts haunting town, 2013 was a proper exorcism. E ksears@seattleweekly.com

Anchored by the deft drumming of Seattle rock ’n’ roll royalty D’Vonne Lewis (his father was R&B legend Dave Lewis), garage-jazz band Industrial Revelation revels in lengthy and often slashing jazz deconstructions from organist Josh Rawlings, stand-up bass player Evan Flory Barnes, and trumpet player Ahamefule J. Olou.

But what put the band over the top this year was Oak Head, its third album and one that bravely challenges the group’s strengths. The band plays conservative with its talents here while dipping into numerous styles including modal jazz, funk, and Dixieland, but in that restraint is a sense of cool befitting one of the great jazz combos in the history of this city, which is exactly what IR is.

MARK BAUMGARTEN Shortly after forming and releasing its debut EP, Damp Face, last year, La Luz wasted no time embarking on separate spring and summer tours while simultaneously releasing a series of singles and videos and partnering with Hardly Art, who released its excellent full-length It’s Alive. (Things only slowed down for the surf-noir four-piece when, while on tour with Of Montreal, its van was totalled in a terrifying accident). A cursory look at La Luz’s swift rise offers the ideal formula for any band trying to make it: Work hard, play nice, shrug off the flat notes, and carry on. (Fri. Dec. 27–Sat., Dec. 28, Neumos) GWENDOLYN ELLIOTT For sheer cultural impact, Macklemore makes this list. With his producer, Ryan Lewis, the MC known to his dentist as Ben Haggerty occupied Billboard’s #1 spot with two songs for a total of 11 weeks and garnered seven Grammy nominations, and the videos for the four singles from debut record The Heist racked up more than 600 million views on YouTube. That record was released at the end of 2012, the year in which Haggerty and Lewis showed an ability to craft topical pop songs that could launch them into the stratosphere. 2013 was the year they proved they have the talent and business savvy to stay there. MB The Moondoggies are the ballast on the rocking ship that is Seattle’s folk-rock scene. Where fellow folkies The Head and the Heart have broken out and Fleet Foxes have faded from view, the Moondoggies have quietly, steadily stayed the course. The band’s third release, Adios, I’m a Ghost maintains the band’s trademark template of rollicking roots rock, yet stands out as its most expansive album yet. Merry, ramshackle melodies remain—like the jam-tastic, Rhodesforward “Red Eye” and the jangly “One More Chance”—but the band’s three-part harmonies are more cohesive now and thus more haunted, interwoven with layers of reverb that roll in and out like the a.m. Seattle fog. GE In September 2012, two recent Western Washington University grads posted their debut album, Summer’s Gone, online. Within a year, the duo— producers Catacombkid and BeachesBeaches, known together as Odesza—has traveled the country playing countless festivals and sold-out shows while touring with EDM mega-giant Pretty Lights. To top it off, the eponymous track from the band’s 2013 EP My Friends Never Die reached #1 on music-blog aggregator Hype Machine.

Odesza’s unique take on electronic music almost sounds analog; the mixture of warm, crackling drum samples and chopped-up, hazy vocals make My Friends sound like a DJ spinning vinyl at a dance party orbiting the sun. KELTON SEARS E

music@seattleweekly.com

SEATTLE WEEKLY • DECEMBER 25 — 31, 2013

n 1993, Seattle was doing a lot of handwringing.

“Grunge music,” which began as a conscious reaction to the musical excess of the ’80s, was turning the city into a commercial gold mine. Suburban kids from wealthy homes were tying trendy flannel around their waist (thanks in part to Vogue’s flannel fashion spread), and Seattle was not happy.

Grunge is “coming soon to a high school or mall near you,” quipped a New York Times story at the time. In retaliation, Sub Pop Vice President Megan Jasper, then the label’s receptionist, fed the publication a hoax: the nowfamous “Grunge Lexicon.” A hack Newsweek and USA Today article spotlighting Riot Grrl bands triggered an unofficial media blackout from the movement’s adherents, who smelled the culture vultures circling overhead (especially when Disney pitched a Riot Grrl cartoon show). Then, as prophecy foretold, Nickelback and Creed turned grunge’s guttural screams into radio-lite, divorcing the movement from its inherent social critique in favor of anodyneinnocuous Top-40 jams.

For 20 years, the ghost of grunge has haunted Seattle as a strange spectral ectoplasm—sometimes a point of pride, other times an example of integrity lost. In a feat of prestidigitation, we turned Cobain’s flannel back into noble lumberjack wear, replacing fuzzy guitars and scraggly chins with acoustic folk ditties and woods-ready beards. Instead of heavy, we did harmonies. It worked.

But back in ’93, while the debate about Seattle’s authenticity raged on, the kids who worshipped the music didn’t give a damn. They were all in elementary school, and didn’t even know what “cred” meant. They just liked the tunes.

And so those coming of age in the Nevermind Northwest grew up—and this year, we discovered some of their bands.

“It’s no secret that the fellas are influenced by the bands from that era. Jon and Nat are in their early 30s. Jesse’s a little older, but still, that stuff is in their DNA as musicians.”

The label sold out of every copy of Godhead in two weeks. Before the TV appearance.

For a tiny Seattle imprint to experience a run like that—let alone to get a band screen time during a game that, statistics show, 47.2 percent of Seattle’s televisions were tuned to that day—is an absolute feat. It’s also an indication of a sea change. In the world’s eyes again, the “SEATTLE SOUND” is loud: loud as in Deadkill–, Monogamy Party–, and Helms Alee–loud. This last, in fact, gleefully depicts itself as ’90s-style Beavis and Butt-head caricatures in promos, and even started a local amp manufacturer, Verellen, that specializes in fuzzed-out Mudhoney-style tones. These upcoming bands may be indebted to grunge’s sound, but not to its bloated cultural stigmas or the self-mockery that eventually morphed into self-seriousness. Seattle’s new wave of hard-rock bands, as Kristofferson puts it, simply dig that “quintessential Northwest badass loud-as-fuck rock and roll.”

That atavistic DNA in these bands makes for goofy, lighthearted phenotypes as well. Sandrider’s promo shot is just the three dudes spewing beer all over themselves. Helms Alee ride coinoperated ponies in theirs.

ANGEL CEBALLOS

La Luz

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SEATTLE WEEKLY • DECEMBER 25 — 31, 2013

arts&culture» Music T I C K E T S S E L L I N G FA S T !

DJ RIZ DAREK MAZZONE ALAN ALABASTRO OF ALABASTRO PHOTOGRAPHY

So Long, 2013!

Hello, 2014!

DJ EL TORO

S P E C T R A N E W Y E A R’S E V E

2 014

INDULGENCE at EMP

UNDER THE ARCHES AT PA C I F I C S C I E N C E C E N T E R

DJ SHARLESE

12 . 3 1. 2 0 1 3 DRINKS . DJs . DANCING

DJ ALEX

A N U N M AT C H E D V I E W O F T H E F I R E W O R K S

THE SCIENCE OF

Seattle Weekly’s plan-it-now guide to New Year’s Eve.

BY MARK BAUMGARTEN, GAVIN BORCHERT, GWENDOLYN ELLIOTT, AND KELTON SEARS PIANO ROCK’N PARTY Dueling pianos will be center

ABNEY PARK’S CIRCUS AT THE END OF THE WORLD This “Post-Apocalyptic Tribal Steampunk

Shanty” incorporates elements of burlesque and cosplay, set to a soundtrack that’s something like Dead Can Dance meets Evanescence. Come appareled for—and expect—a carnival. Columbia City Theater, 4916 Rainier Ave. S., 722-3009, columbiacity theater.com. 8 p.m. $30 adv./$35 DOS. 21 and over. GE

ARTIST HOME NEW YEAR’S EVE CELEBRATION

The folks at Artist Home invite a litany of talented musicians to close out a huge year—during which the booking and promotion company started the

Timber! Music Festival—and welcome a fruitful 2014—during which it will undertake another new fest, Timbrrr! (Jan. 10–11). Glad tidings and cover songs will abound, including a Velvet Underground cover by Ravenna Woods leader Chris Cunningham and a Kinks cover by Gabriel Mintz. With Big Sur, Invisible Shivers, Youth Rescue Mission, Friday Mile.

Conor Byrne Pub, 5140 Ballard Ave. N.W., 784-3640, conorbyrnepub.com. 9 p.m. $15. 21 and over. MB THE FLAVR BLUE Fronted by Hollis Wong-Wear— made famous by Macklemore’s “White Walls”—The Flavr Blue’s electro-R&B will make for a bumping New Year’s alongside Kingdom Crumbs’ esoteric MCs. With Nightmare Fortress, Kingdom Crumbs and DJ100Proof. The Crocodile, 2200 Second Ave., 441-4618, thecrocodile.com. 9 p.m. $15 adv. 21 and over. KS LEFTOVER CRACK This New York City punk band— with a litany of criminal offenses, venue bans, and crusty punk ’tude—hasn’t released an album since 2007’s Deadline, but if you want to kick off 2014 with some mayhem, you’ll find it here tonight. With Skarp, Juicy Karkass, Vile Display of Humanity, The Vatican.

El Corazon, 109 Eastlake Ave. E., 381-3094, elcorazon seattle.com. 7 p.m. $15 adv./$20 DOS. All ages. GE INDULGENCE The EMP will transform into a futurefacing party lair as 3,000 people fill its space-aged hull for the Northwest’s largest New Year’s party, where they can choose among 25 onsite bars and five different entertainment experiences, including a comedy stage, the MOViN 92.5 DJ stage, an ’80s invasion stage, and a party-band stage. EMP Museum, 325 Fifth Ave. N., seattlebash.com. $69 General admission $199 VIP Gold/$350 VIP Platinum.

21 and over. MB HELL’S BELLES True to its name, the legendary nightclub Fenix is rising from the ashes yet again—for the sixth time in two decades!—and has fittingly chosen New Year’s Eve to christen its new Pioneer Square space (which previously housed The Last Supper Club). All-female AC/DC cover band Hell’s Belles will provide the soundtrack, and you will provide the action. With DJ Kryspin, Seattle Aerialists. The Fenix, 124 S. Washington St., 748-9975, fenixseattle. com. $25+ adv/$60 VIP. 21 and over. MB PONCHO SANCHEZ The iconic bandleader caps a midwinter stand with two shows of unseasonably hot Latin jazz for New Year’s crowds. The early show can include a four-course dinner and time enough to continue the party at home before the ball drops.

But the full-on celebration goes down during the late set, with desserts, party favors, and lots of conga.

Jazz Alley, 2033 Sixth Ave., 441-9729, jazzalley.com.

6:30 p.m.: $119.50 w/dinner, $64.50 w/o dinner. 10:30 p.m.: $104.50. All ages. MB LEROY BELL & HIS ONLY FRIENDS The local Billboard-topping songwriter and X Factor star adds to the celebratory vibe by officially releasing his new album, Rock N’ Soul, at this show (with a little help from his friends, of course, including his three-piece

» CONTINUED ON PAGE 30

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SEATTLE WEEKLY • DECEMBER 25 — 31, 2013

stage, as usual, for this party in Pioneer Square that will also feature food and drink specials. 88 Keys, 315 Second Ave. S., 839-1300, ilove88keys.com. $15 singles/$25 couples. 8 p.m. 21 and over. MB BLACK & WHITE BALL Ground zero for New Year’s in Fremont will be at the Ballroom, which will ring in 2014 with its Seventh Annual Black & White Ball. For a fair price, partiers will receive everything necessary for a proper send-off to 2013, including photos, appetizers, party hats, and mini–champagne bottles.

Ballroom, 456 N. 36th St., 635-2575, ballroomfremont. com. $25 adv. 8 p.m. 21 and over. MB SEATTLE SYMPHONY It’s all dessert on the Seattle Symphony’s NYE menu: John Williams’ Star Wars score, a couple rousing orchestral dances, music from Nutcracker (in both the Tchaikovsky and Ellington/Strayhorn versions) and Rhapsody in Blue. Stay until midnight at the post-concert party.

Benaroya Hall, Third Avenue & Union Street, 2154747, seattlesymphony.org. 9 p.m. $52–$153. GB THE ARI JOSHUA BAND If you’re looking to keep it local tonight, check out singer/songwriter Ari Joshua, who’s played with every hometown luminary from Skerik and Mike McCready to Stone Gossard, Michael Shrieve, and Peter Buck. Blue Moon, 712 N.E. 45th St., 675-9116, bluemoonseattle.wordpress. com. 9 p.m. $10. 21 and over. GE MIDNIGHT TOAST Beer lovers, head to Brouwer’s Cafe, where tenders will be pouring a complimentary toast from Fremont Brewing, Outlander Brewing, and Reuben’s Brews, all served in exclusive three-liter bottles. Brouwer’s Cafe, 400 N. 35th St., 267-2437, brouwerscafe.blogspot.com. 21 and over. MB PARTY AT CHIHULY GARDEN AND GLASS Nibble on poached-pear skewers and truffle-mozzarellastuffed arancini at this elegant affair beneath the Space Needle, where you’ll be well-positioned for the midnight fireworks (not to mention the midnight Veuve Clicquot toast and the smooth sounds of The Robert Vickers Band). Chihuly Garden and Glass, Seattle Center, chihulygardenandglass.com/newyears-eve. $200/parking, gratuities, museum admission included. 21 and over. GE LICK! Seattle’s dance party for “dykes, trannies, fags, and friends” will kick off the new year with its resident DJs Dewey Decimal and Mathematix, as well as Roy G BIV. Chop Suey, 1325 E. Madison St., 3248005, chopsuey.com. 8 p.m. $5. 21 and over. KS

8 : 3 0 P. M . – 2 A . M .

21+

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1303 NE 45TH ST JAZZ ALLEY IS A SUPPER CLUB

PONCHO SANCHEZ AND HIS LATIN JAZZ BAND FRI, DEC 27 - TUES, DEC 31

FOUR NYE PACKAGE OPTIONS - visit website!

Grammy-winning Master Conguero Poncho Sanchez and his legendary 7-piece firey Latin jazz band

PEARL DJANGO WITH SPECIAL GUEST BUCKY PIZZARELLI THURS, JAN 2 - SUN, JAN 5

Seattle-based gypsy jazz favorites with jazz guitar great!

TUCK AND PATTI TUES, JAN 7 - WED, JAN 8

American jazz guitar and vocal duo, celebrating 35 years!

JEFF LORBER FUSION FEATURING BRIAN BROMBERG, PATRICK LAMB AND GARY NOVAK THURS, JAN 9 - SUN, JAN 12

Trailblazing Grammy-nominated keyboardist, composer and producer with his fusion band

all ages | free parking full schedule at jazzalley.com

NTw.RlitYtlereMdhUenS.coICm LIVE COUww THURS DECEMBER 26TH

ROBBIE WALDEN 9PM - $3 COVER

FRI DECEMBER 27TH

MARLIN JAMES 9PM - $5 COVER

SEATTLE WEEKLY • DECEMBER 25 — 31, 2013

SAT DECEMBER 28TH

30

BROKEN TRAIL 9PM - $5 COVER

SUN DECEMBER 29TH

HIGHWAY 20

9PM - $3 COVER 4PM OPEN MIC / ACOUSTIC JAM W/ BILLY BODACIOUS TUES DECEMBER 31ST

NEW YEARS EVE: KNUT BELL & THE BLUE COLLARS OPEN AT 9PM - $10 COVER INCLUDES ENTRANCE, MUSIC, PARTY FAVORS & CHAMPAGNE TOAST @ MIDNIGHT

MONDAY AND WEDNESDAY

KARAOKE WITH DJ FORREST GUMP 9:00PM • NO COVER

FREE COUNTRY DANCE LESSONS WITH OUR HOST MARY ANN AT 8PM; SUN, MON, TUES

HAPPY HOUR 9AM-NOON & 4-7 PM • MON-FRI

WELL DRINKS & DOMESTIC BOTTLED BEER $2 16 OZ. MICROS $3.50 DINNER: 5-10PM EVERYDAY BREAKFAST & LUNCH: SAT 8AM-2PM / SUN 9AM-2PM 7115 WOODLAWN AVENUE NE 522-1168

arts&culture» Music So Long, 2013! Hello, 2014! » FROM PAGE 29 band, host Marty Reimer, and openers Red Jacket Mine). Kirkland Performance Center, 350 Kirkland Ave., Kirkland, 425-893-9900, kpcenter.org. 9 p.m. $45.

21 and over. GE KNUT BELL AND THE BLUE COLLARS A driving Americana sound—what the showman calls “Hauling Ass Honky Tonk”—defines the country music of Knut Bell, Seattle Weekly’s Best Country Artist of 2012.

With his band, the tunes are twangy, the spirit merry, and the cowboy-boot-scuffed dance floor packed at his annual New Year’s show at Little Red Hen, 7115 Woodlawn Ave. N.E., 522-1168, littleredhen.com. 9 p.m. $10. GE NEW YEAR’S TOAST & HANGOVER SPECIALS

All three locations of LunchBox Laboratory (Seattle, Bellevue, and Gig Harbor) will serve $5 champagne and drink specials to ring out the old year— and the next morning will offer “hangover food and drink specials” to ring in the new. lunchboxlaboratory.com. All ages.

WHITE WINTERLAND, FEAT. A TRAK AND BASSJACKERS Those wanting to kick off 2014 with

a blitz of house music should head over the bridge to Bellevue, where Dutch duo Bassjackers will play the midnight slot on a bill packed with world-class DJs. Dress code dictates that revelers wear white, and the lineup dictates that you stay late for headliner (and sometimes personal tour DJ for Kanye) A Trak. With Downlink, Starkillers, Torro Torro, Luminox, Party Favor.

Meydenbauer Center, 11100 N.E. Sixth St., Bellevue, 425-637-1020, stardustpro.com. 7 p.m. $39–$100 adv.

18 and over. GE NEW YEAR’S EVE FEAT. ROUGE The menu for Maximilien’s bash: foie gras, mushroom bisque, venison or lobster, mousse au chocolat. The entertainment: Rouge, a voice/violin/accordion trio in French cafe style. It all sounds delectable. Maximilien, 81 Pike St., 682-7271, maximilienrestaurant.com. $95–$125. All ages. GB THE BLACK ANGELS If massive fireworks displays aren’t trippy enough for you, psych overlords the Black Angels will put on an absolutely mind-melting visual spectacle—swirling fractals and drippy liquid projections dance around as the band casts its ’60s-inspired spells. The Moore, 1932 Second Ave., 784-4849, stg presents.com. 9 p.m. $32.50. 21 and over. KS CHAMPAGNE TOAST & BRUNCH Each of the four Neighborhood Grill locations (Greenlake, Eastlake, Lake Forest, and Bremerton) will offer a special menu, live music, and a midnight toast. Then they’ll turn around and help you through your first morning of 2014, opening at 9 a.m. to serve brunch with drink specials. neighborhoodgrills.com. All ages. MB LEFTOVER SALMON FEAT. BILL PAYNE In stark contrast to Leftover Crack, Leftover Salmon takes a slower approach to its musicality, blending bluegrass and country styles into breezy jam rock. The band calls it “polyethnic Cajun slamgrass,” and dropped its recent statement on the subject, Aquatic Hitchhiker, last year. Accompanied by Little Feat’s Bill Payne, this is bound to be a fiddle- and banjo-heavy night that’ll have you jonesing for actual leftovers after midnight.

With Fruition. The Neptune, 1303 N.E. 45th St., 682-1414, stgpresents.org/neptune. 8:30 p.m. $50. GE STRFKR The Northwest’s favorite lo-fi electro-indie pop band is shooting confetti poppers tonight with Pillar Point, the new electronic dance project from Throw Me the Statue’s Scott Reitherman. Be prepared to shimmy in your shiny NYE shoes tonight. With Teen Daze, Alexico. Neumos, 925 E. Pike St., 709-9442, neumos.com. 8 p.m. $25 adv. 21 and over.

YOSH & DJ ESTYLZ Dance away 2013 on the ’Ohana dance floor before heading out to the deck, from which you can watch the New Year’s Eve fireworks welcome in 2014.

Then go dance again. ’Ohana, 2207 First Ave., 956-9329, ohanabelltown.com. 21 and over. MB SPECTRA 2014 Check out aerial exhibits and fire sculptures as DJ Riz, Darek Mazzone, DJ El Toro, DJ Sharlese, and DJ Alex, all from local independent radio station KEXP, spin New Year’s tunes. Pacific Science Center, 200 Second Ave. N., 443-2887, pacificsciencecenter.org. 8:30 p.m.–2 a.m. $100. 21 and over. KS BIG BAND JAZZ FROM THE ’30S–’50S

Party like it’s 1939 with swinging tunes from the Big Band age. Don’t forget your eraappropriate dance moves, too, like the cakewalk, the jitterbug, and the Charleston (what

COURTESY OF THE ARTIST

2033 6th Avenue (206) 441-9729 jazzalley.com

Donna Reed and Jimmy Stewart were doing when they fell into the pool in It’s a Wonderful Life). Royal Room, 5000 Rainier Ave. S., 906-9920, theroyalroomseattle. com. 9 p.m. Free. All ages. GE CHILDREN’S COUNTDOWN TO THE NEW YEAR At the top of each hour as the new year arrives in a different country, kiddos at the museum will raise a glass of juice and spend the hour doing a craft related to the tradition of that country. Seattle Children’s Museum, Center House, Seattle Center, 441-1768, thechildrensmuseum.org. 10 a.m.–5 p.m. $8.25 per adult, $8.25 per child, $7.25 per grandparent. All ages. KS SUPER DIAMOND Remember Saving Silverman’s Neil Diamond cover band, Diamonds in the Rough? Now just picture it in the Showbox, add more members, and slap on Diamond’s own stamp of approval, and you’ve got the best version of “Sweet Caroline” this side of the sequined Vegas star himself. Showbox at the Market, 628-3151, showboxpresents.com. 9 p.m. $35–$40 adv./$45 DOS. 21 and over. GE UNCORKED NYE WITH MICHAEL DUNCAN AND DJ STASCHE A ticket to this party gets you food,

drinks, and access to a photobooth where you and your pals can take drunken pictures of yourselves after a long night of dancing. Sole Repair Shop, 1001 E. Pike St., 979-SHOP, solerepairshop.com. 9 p.m. $75. 21 and over. KS ST. JAMES CATHEDRAL Billed as a “Royal New Year’s at Versailles,” St. James’ annual celebration includes festive French music from the reigns of three monarchs, from a Mass by Charpentier to a chamber concerto by the eccentric pianist Charles-Valentin Alkan.

St. James Cathedral, 804 Ninth Ave., 622-3559, stjamescathedral.org. 11 p.m. $30 suggested donation. GB STAR ANNA If you can’t wait to say good riddance to 2013, you’re in good company tonight. Star Anna composed her new album, Go to Hell, during a time of “battles and betrayals,” she says. “The title speaks for itself.” Send the year packing at this send-off, featuring the singer’s wailing blues-rock growl. With Shane Tutmarc, Guests. Sunset Tavern, 784-4880, sunset tavern.com. 9:30 p.m. $12. 21 and over. GE “THE ROLLING STONES” Jordan Blilie and Devin Welch, formerly of Seattle’s defunct post-hardcore heroes the Blood Brothers, now lead this Stones cover band (hence the quotation marks). With Country Lips, Pony Time, Tractor Tavern, 5213 Ballard Ave. N., 7893599, tractortavern.com. 9 p.m. $20. 21 and over. GE STORM LARGE is best recognized as the sultry, powerful singer on CBS’s Rock Star Supernova, but she was making waves long before that as a Portland loungecore artist who would perform cabaret covers of ABBA, Billy Idol, and many more. She’s a commanding presence, and a riot too. Triple Door, 216 Union St., 8384333, thetripledoor.net. 7 p.m.: $100 (dinner), all ages.

10:30 p.m.: $70 (dessert), 21 and over. MB RESOLUTION 2014, FEAT. ABOVE & BEYOND AND KNIFE PARTY The people who put on Freaknight and

Paradiso present their New Year’s rave/EDM carnival featuring bass-happy DJs and plenty of aerial acrobats flipping around in gold and white body paint. WaMu Theatre, 800 Occidental Ave. S., resolutionseattle.com.

7 p.m. $85. 18 and over. KS

The Flavr Blue

arts&culture» Music

SevenNights E D I T E D B Y G W E N D O LY N E L L I O T T

Thursday, Dec. 26 Boise’s BUILT TO SPILL earned its place as a Northwest indie institution with a canon of revered albums like 1999’s Keep It Like a Secret and 2001’s Ancient Melodies of the Future, and its flawless guitar rock and jangled, pop-inflected melodies influenced the likes of the Shins and the Unicorns. Neumos, 925 E. Pike St., 709-9442, neumos.com. With Erik Blood Dec. 26, La Luz Dec. 27–28. 8 p.m. $25 adv. 21 and over. DUSTY HENRY CASEY MACGILL & KAYLEE COLE Post-holiday slump got you down? This show should help. Crooner MacGill, who also plays in the Blue 4 Trio, will fill his set with classic blues and boogie tunes, plus a few ballads for good measure. Then Cole, who performs with Widower and the Seattle Rock Orchestra, will close the night with her piano-driven ditties and maybe a cover or two. Vito’s, 927 Ninth Ave., 397-4053, vitosseattle. com. 5:30 p.m. Free. AZARIA C. PODPLESKY

Friday, Dec. 27

BOTTOMS UP For better or for worse, 2013 was marked

by twerking; you know what they say, if you can’t beat ’em, join ’em. This monthly queer dance party presents a formidable lineup of DJs and hip-hop artists suitable for prime booty-popping, and it’s your last chance to get in your twerks before the year ends. With DJ Action Jackson, Party Tribe Trolls, DJ Jam Jeanz. Chop Suey, 1325 E. Madison St., 324-8005, chopsuey.com.

9 p.m. $5 before 11 p.m., $7 after. 21 and over. DH BLACK BREATH 2012’s Sentenced to Life is a refreshing throwback to classic death metal, but its modern thrash and punk edge keeps things from getting too bogged down in nostalgia. Tonight, the band closes a busy year in front of their hometown crowd—time to get all that post-holiday family-fueled rage out in a proper setting. With Paralyzer, Old Skin, Countdown to Armageddon. Crocodile Cafe, 2200 Second Ave., 4414618, thecrocodile.com. 8 p.m. $10 JAMES BALLINGER Even though this is only its second show, BURIEN has already garnered impressive buzz. Consisting of members from local acts like Brokaw and Master Musicians of Bukkake, the group plays late-’70s-style melodic

STRFKR

Monday, December 30– Tuesday, December 31

U

COURTESY OF THE ARTIST

Saturday, Dec. 28

STAINED BY A KILLER Lush harmonies and bowed

upright bass give this roots-rock quartet a surprisingly deep, rich sound. The solid instrumental performances are complemented by Annie Lockwood and Charles Wilson’s inventive songwriting. With You Knew Me When, Ned Collette, Aaron Daniel. Blue Moon, 712 N.E. 45th St., 675-9116, bluemoonseattle.wordpress.com.

9 p.m. $6. MFB REIGNWOLF was relatively quiet for much of 2013, likely regrouping after a 2012 that saw the band—which generally consists of just its primary member, virtuosic blues guitarist Jordan Cook—break out and land on just about every festival lineup in the area. Then December came, and in the course of a week the band announced an opening slot for Black Sabbath; premiered a new growling blues-rock single, “In the Dark,” on rollingstone.com; and went on a quick Australian tour, where Cook further solidified his legendary status as someone willing to play his guitar anywhere, with any item onstage, while standing on any questionably stable surface. That’s pretty much as rock ’n’ roll as it gets. With Ravenna Woods, Hobosexual. The Neptune, 1303 N.E. 45th St. 682-1414, stgpresents.org. 9 p.m. $20. 21 and over. MARK S. BAUMGARTEN

mathy beats, and a pulsing bass that jump-starts the dance party.

When I reviewed a STRFKR show in February, I noted that this is a band of millennials that makes music for other millennials, which only enhances the idea that its music will make a perfect playlist for another booze-enhanced New Year’s Eve (or pre-NYE celebration). It’s fuzzy and messy, chaotic and ear-splitting; there are balloons and flashy lights and confetti. It’s a sensory overload in the most pleasurable way.

Because of all this, you won’t mind that those STRFKR songs that do have lyrics generally consist of incoherent sound bites or inaudible ideas drowned out by heavy synths (in a quieter setting, though, you can hear they are often samples of lectures by philosopher Alan Watts). Even the mellower tracks, the best of which are found on this year’s Miracle Mile, place production at the forefront. It makes sense: At the end of the year, it’s all about the vibes. With Teen Daze, Alexico, Pillar Point (Tuesday only). Neumos, 925 E. Pike St., 709-9442, neumos.com. 8 p.m. $25 adv. 21 and over. KEEGAN PROSSER

SEATTLE WEEKLY • DECEMBER 25 — 31, 2013

ntil I saw Nine Inch Nails a few weeks back, electronic act STRFKR’s set at the Neptune earlier this year was my favorite show of 2013. I know, putting the fellas of STRFKR in the same category as Trent Reznor is, well, kind of a big freaking deal, and yes, STRFKR’s music isn’t categorically anywhere close to NIN’s industrial doom rock. But ignore whatever negative connotations the comparison might bring to mind, because STRFKR is just as insanely mindblowing as NIN. Based in Portland, the four-piece has built a reputation for its energetic electronic cuts, first introduced on 2007’s Starfucker EP (there was some controversy about that name, and the band was known as Pyramiddd for a time before it changed to STRFKR). But even better than its excitable tunes is its electrically charged live show, which features an assortment of live instrumentation,

punk-rock reminiscent of Gang of Four. With Tombs of Ligea, Le Cancer. JewelBox Theater, 2322 Second Ave., 441-5823, jewelboxtheater.com. 10 p.m. 21 and over. JB Boulder’s THE MOTET seamlessly blends funk grooves, electronic beats, and African and Latin rhythms into a crowd-driven live show reminiscent of those of the Grateful Dead or Phish. Its new album, due in January, is its first in four years, and will feature songs cowritten by all nine band members. With World’s Finest, DJ Leopold Bloom. Nectar Lounge, 412 N. 36th St., 632-2020, nectarlounge.com. 8 p.m. $12 adv./$16 DOS. MICHAEL F. BERRY ZOE MUTH may well have been born in the wrong era— not to mention the wrong part of the U.S.—but however she came to be ours, Seattle ought to consider her its own country-music treasure, precious in its rarity. (Sadly, we have to share her with Austin, Texas these days.) Muth owns a mike like an old soul with stories to tell, daring her audience not to listen. With the Dusty 45s, the Swearengens, Miller and Sasser.

Tractor Tavern, 5213 Ballard Ave. N.W., 789-3599, tractortavern.com. 9 p.m. $15 adv. 21 and over.

JESSIE MCKENNA

31

Buy, Sell & Barter

arts&culture» Music

shop, Good selection, Fun

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THURSDAY, DECEMBER 26

TRANSCENDENCE

SEATTLE WEEKLY • DECEMBER 25 — 31, 2013

with Walter & The Conqueror, Baphomet MC and Photons Lounge Show. Doors at 7 / Show at 7:30PM ALL AGES/BAR W/ID. $8 ADV / $10 DOS

32

SUNDAY, DECEMBER 29 “Pack The House Night” featuring:

UNHAILOED with Dressed As Super Heroes, Drone Strike, Hellephant, The West Coast

Improvement Company, Antitheus and Something Strange. Doors at 4:30 / Show at 5PM

ALL AGES/BAR W/ID. $9 ADV / $11 DOS

FRIDAY, DECEMBER 27

MONDAY, DECEMBER 30

Seattle’s #1 Skateboard Event Of The Year!

JUMPING FENCES with Singled Out, Forgetter and

ALL CITY SHOWDOWN #8 Doors at 7:30 / Show at 8PM ALL AGES/BAR W/ID. $8

SATURDAY, DECEMBER 28 Justice Rock Productions & Just Bird Present: “THE NAUGHTY LIST” featuring:

MONSTERS SCARE YOU with

We The Audience, Prestige, Showtime (EP Release), Home Alone and Stories Away

Doors at 6 / Show at 6:30PM ALL AGES/BAR W/ID. $10 ADV / $13 DOS

SATURDAY, DECEMBER 28

The Monsters Scare You Aftershow Party!

Featuring Back To Back DJ Sets from:

LANGBO SAVAGE with RedJet Lounge Show. 21+. FREE.

Spinning starts immediately after the conclusion of The Monsters Scare You show in the showroom.

The Waywards Lounge Show. Doors at 7 / Show at 7:30PM All Ages/Bar W/ID. $5

TUESDAY, DECEMBER 31 NEW YEAR’S EVE with:

LEFTOVER CRACK

with Skarp, Juicy Karkass, Vile Display Of Humanity and The Vatican Doors at 7 / Show at 9PM All Ages/Bar W/ID. $15 ADV / $20 DOS

WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 1

BUSINESS SHARKS

with No, Not Really, plus guests Lounge Show. Doors at 7/ Show at 7:30PM ALL AGES/BAR W/ID. $8 ADV / $10 DOS

JUST ANNOUNCED 1/7 LOUNGE !MINDPARADE 1/16 LOUNGE STATION TO STATION 2/14 ABIGAIL WILLIAMS 2/20 THE LAWRENCE ARMS 2/22 LOUNGE MAJOR LEAGUE 2/28 TJ MILLER 4/6 MOURNING MARKET 5/15 MIKE TRAMP (WHITE LION) 6/19 JAKE E. LEE’S RED DRAGON CARTEL UP & COMING 1/3 NUMBER STATION (FORMERLY PIPEDOWN) 1/4 & 1/5 COLOSSAL FEST 1/6 LOUNGE THE HORSE I RODE 1/10 EARLY SCHOOL OF ROCK PRESENTS THE BIG 4 (METALLICA, ANTHRAX, SLAYER, MEGADETH) 1/10 LATE SCHOOL OF ROCK PRESENTS BLACK SABBATH 1/11 VOLTAIRE 1/12 LOUNGE HATTERS FOR HIRE 1/17 PHIL ANSELMO & THE ILLEGALS 1/18 D.R.I. 1/19 SHYAN SELAH & THE REPUBLIC OF SOUND 1/19 LOUNGE JAYKE ORVIS AND HIS BROKEN BAND 1/22 LOUNGE LETTERS 1/23 LOUNGE CALABRESE 1/24 EMERY 1/25 THE EXPENDABLES Tickets now available at cascadetickets.com - No per order fees for online purchases. Our on-site Box Office is open 1pm-5pm weekdays in our office and all nights we are open in the club - $2 service charge per ticket Charge by Phone at 1.800.514.3849. Online at www.cascadetickets.com - Tickets are subject to service charge

The EL CORAZON VIP PROGRAM: see details at www.elcorazon.com/vip.html and for an application email us at info@elcorazonseattle.com

Eighth Annual Hayride to Hell feat. Walking Papers

Thursday, December 31

W

alking Papers highlights one of the great strengths of the Seattle music scene: its incestuous, collaborative nature. Since so many musicians play in so many projects, there are moments when it seems as if every Seattle band is a supergroup, whether you’re talking about players who gained attention during the city’s ’90s heyday or today’s crop of neo-folkies. Pick nearly any successful Seattle rock band of today, and you can connect the dots to a cadre of others.

Through Walking Papers you can chart a course to bands from Jet City and beyond: Guns N’ Roses, Fastbacks, Screaming Trees, Skin Yard, Mad Season, and more. The band—singer/guitarist Jeff Angell, bassist Duff McKagan, drummer Barrett Martin, and keyboardist Benjamin Anderson— have at least 100 years of band experience among them. Factor in Mike McCready of Pearl Jam, who plays on Walking Papers’ self-titled debut, and you’re looking at one of the most experienced bands in rock, in this city or any other.

McKagan, currently on hiatus from Loaded, describes the band’s sound as “dirty blues”—a

CHARLES PETERSON

age Stereo

Records, Guitars & Vint

kind of mid-tempo, groove-oriented hard rock that sounds great in strip joints. Some moments on their debut sound like the Black Crowes (“Leave Me in the Dark”), while others summon Josh Homme and Queens of the Stone Age (“Your Secret’s Safe With Me”), with Angell’s raspy, pained delivery giving the songs a soulful anchor—as if Procol Harum were really into Black Sabbath.

Fresh off a European tour with Alice in Chains and gearing up for a spot in Australia’s Soundwave Festival, Walking Papers is primed to deliver a top-notch New Year’s Eve performance. They’ll share the stage with another seasoned Seattle pro, Mark Pickerel (with His Praying Hands).

Pickerel was the original drummer in Screaming Trees—who, coincidentally, was replaced by Walking Papers’ Martin (see: incestuous). Also on the bill are the Pink Slips, led by McKagan’s teenage daughter Grace, who played the CBGB Music and Film Festival earlier this year, where papa McKagan was the keynote speaker. Highway 99, 1414 Alaskan Way, 382-2171, highwayninety nine.com. 7 p.m. $45. DAVE LAKE

Sunday, Dec. 29

Monday, Dec. 30

The definition between pop-rock and indie rock has blurred in recent years. Taking its cues from the Strokes and Spoon, UH OH ESKIMO has the look of indie rockers, but embrace its pop sensibilities. With Tim Fantastic & the Styrofoam Meat Trays, Joey Farr.

High Dive, 513 N. 36th St., 632-0212, highdiveseattle. com. 8 p.m. $6. 21 and over. DH JEFF CROSBY makes exactly the kind of music you’d expect from an Idaho boy who moved to L.A. to get famous. He plays spud-farm folk with fancy finger picking, but his sound is polished for a mass audience and best when backed by the soaring organ of his backing band the Refugees. With Pepper Proud. Nectar Lounge.

8 p.m. $5 adv./$8 DOS. 21 and over. DANIEL PERSON THE SANGSTER FAMILY BAND When John M. Sangster Sr. passed away suddenly in November, the Sangsters wondered if the show really had to go on.

After some debate, the multigenerational country/ rock/blues band decided to keep the date and perform in John’s honor. You’ll no doubt recognize his sons Jim and John from their work in every Seattle band from the Tripwires to Young Fresh Fellows. With Miles & Karina, Christy McWilson. The Royal Room, 5000 Rainier Ave. S., 906-9920, theroyalroomseattle.com.

6 p.m. Free; donations accepted to benefit Children’s Hospital. All ages. ACP Saxophone in hand, KAREEM KANDI and his band have quietly become regarded as one of the hardestworking jazz outfits in the Pacific Northwest. In the daytime Kandi serves as artist in residence at the Tacoma School of Art, while at night he lets it wail for audiences seeking to hear the real shit. Seamonster Lounge, 2202 N. 45th St., 992-1120, seamonsterlounge. com. 10 p.m. Free. CORBIN REIFF BRIAN SETZER ORCHESTRA The former Stray Cats frontman struts his stuff for the 10th year running in his “Christmas Rocks!” holiday show, featuring original (rockabilly!) renditions of classic holiday tunes and songs penned by Setzer himself. The 20-member group is one of a dwindling few big bands touring the globe today. Bonus: For the holidays, they’re known to don classic red and white . . . and leopard print. Snoqualmie Casino, 37500 S.E. North Bend Way, Snoqualmie, 425888-1234, snocasino.com. 7 p.m. SOLD OUT. 21 and over. JM

GARFIELD HIGH SCHOOL JAZZ: JAM WITH ALUMNI Most people want to forget high school as

soon as they receive their diploma. These monthly jam sessions (tonight’s led by GHS alumni/alto sax player Jacob Zimmerman), on the other hand, give former Bulldogs a chance to relive their band days alongside current students in the award-winning program. The Royal Room. 5:30 p.m. Free; donations accepted. Note: The third annual “Home for the Holidays” jazz concert follows at 8 p.m. $12 adv./$15 DOS. ACP WE GOT NOW HIP-HOP SHOWCASE aims to let the world know that Mack and Ryan aren’t the only hip-hop artists repping Seattle. Hosted by KUBE 93’s Spaceman and Dirty Harry, and featuring DJ S. Malik and a performance by hometown favorite Grynch, this showcase will put more than a dozen of the area’s most talented rappers in the spotlight. With Fatal Lucciauno, Dolce Drako, Young Fast, Rush, Seattle Doe, Jamesupopo, Bari Bux, Yellow Linez, King Butch, Jesse James, Mega EvErs, Tay Billions, M.O.E.T., KSneak, Sean Kidd, Six Scratch, Trel Fitted, DJ S. Malik on the 1’s and 2’s. Studio Seven, 110 S. Horton St., 286-1312, studioseven.us. 8:30 p.m. $10 adv./$15 DOS. All ages. ACP

Tuesday, Dec. 31

See New Year’s Eve Listings on page 29.

Answers for “20 Questions About 2013” on page 5.

1. c 2. a 3. d 4. a 5. b

6. d 7. d 8. b 9. b 10. b

11. b 12. c 13. d 14. c 15. d

16. c 17. a 18. c 19. b 20. d

arts&culture» The Secret to Choice Wellness’ Success

C

hoice Wellness Center isn’t the

biggest of the many dispensaries on Aurora Avenue, but if you count its previous location in the U District, it’s been around longer than most.

There are always reasons for a shop’s longevity in such a competitive environment, so I checked out Choice on a recent weekday afternoon to see what gave it such lasting power.

The access point is

BY STEVE ELLIOTT located inside the former office of a shut-down motel, and as such, it’s close quarters. But the shop doesn’t feel cramped; it feels cozy. That’s at least partly due to the friendly welcome extended by budtender Calvin, who also happens to know his cannabis.

Choice Wellness has an excellent selection of cannabis-infused topicals; in fact, its topicals shelf would put to shame those of a few shops twice its size.

There were only about 10 strains on the shelves when I visited; Calvin said there are usually more. One shelf held four sativa-dominants, and another had around half a dozen indicas; prices ranged from $10 on the left to $12 in the middle to $15 on the right.

Now I’m not crazy about paying $15 a gram, and when I do, I insist on being impressed. But I quickly decided life’s too short not to try the best weed in the place, selecting two $15 strains, the indica Head Band and—at Calvin’s suggestion—the sativa Chocolope.

Once the sampling started, it didn’t take long to figure out that if there’s such thing as an appropriately priced $15 weed in Seattle, this Head Band is it. These rock-hard, tightly trimmed nugs may not be the prettiest flowers you’ve ever seen, but they pack a pleasing punch, quelling nausea and pain even as the potent brain fuel puts your thoughts into overdrive.

A festive Chocolope.

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STEVE ELLIOTT

TOKESIGNALS

I know this is atypical advice for an indica, but if you enjoy indulging your creativity, I predict you’ll love Head Band. Just be cautious if you’re tempted to take a big ol’ toke: This weed has a lot of lung expansion once inhaled, and is capable of making you cough your ass off.

As I mentioned, Calvin recommended the Chocolope, and I’ve rarely regretted taking a budtender’s advice. Nobody’s in a better position both to sample every strain in the house and to weigh patient feedback on a daily basis. So it’s no surprise that he was right about the Chocolope.

This almost-pure sativa (95 percent) is a blend of Cannalope and Chocolate Thai, and it’s as delicious as it sounds. The cross retains much of the Chocolate Thai’s taste, mixed with a bit of the Cannalope’s ripe sweetness. It delivers dreamy but

S.A.M

RMMCconsulting.com (206) 395-8280

intense cerebral effects, alleviating stress and magnifying appetite. If you are sensitive to strong sativas, proceed with caution, as this strain, in addition to giving relief, will also get you quite high.

First-time patients get a free medible; I recommend the in-house Soma brownies. I was also pleased to find a lighter in my bag when I got home. E

tokesignals@seattleweekly.com

Steve Elliott edits Toke Signals at tokesignals. com, an irreverent, independent blog of cannabis news, views, and information.

BLOG ON » POT xTOKESIGNALS.COM

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33

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34

W W W. S E AT T L E W E E K LY. C O M / S I G N U P

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Employment Automotive

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Auto Tech Wanted

Rare opening in Busy Bainbrige shop! Seeking exp’d ASE Certified Technician. Top pay and benefits Great inviroment in a Mon - Fri shop. All inquiries are confidential.

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Weekend & live-in positions available. Call 206-439-2458 • 877-271-2601

Employment General

Outside Advertising Sales Consultant SEATTLE WEEKLY

hreast@soundpublishing.com

ATTN: HR/SEA. No phone calls please.

Sound Publishing is an Equal Opportunity Employer (EOE) and strongly supports diversity in the workplace.

Check out our website to find out more about us! www.soundpublishing.com

Announcements

MARKETING COORDINATOR The Daily Herald, Snohomish County’s source for outstanding local news and community information for more than 100 years and a division of Sound Publishing, Inc. is seeking a Marketing Coordinator to assist with multi-platform advertising and marketing solutions of print, web, mobile, e-newsletters, daily deals, event sponsorships and special publications as well as the daily operations of the Marketing department.

Responsibilities include but are not limited to the coordination, updating and creation of marketing materials across a range of delivery channels, social media, contesting, events, house marketing, newsletters and working closely with the Sr. Marketing Manager to develop strategies and implement the marketing plan. The right individual will be a highly organized, responsible, self-motivated, customer-comes-first proven problem-solver who thrives in a fast-paced, deadline-driven environment with the ability to think ahead of the curve. We offer a competitive salary and benefits package including health insurance, paid time off (vacation, sick, and holidays), and 401K (currently with an employer match.)

If you meet the above qualifications and are seeking an opportunity to be part of a venerable media company, email us your resume and cover letter to hreast@soundpublishing.com No phone calls please.

Sound Publishing is an Equal Opportunity Employer (EOE) and strongly supports diversity in the workplace. Check out our website to find out more about us! www.soundpublishing.com HELP WANTED!!

Make up to $1000 A Week Mailing Brochures From Home!

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Employment Computer/Technology Engineering ServiceNow, Inc. has a Senior Software Engineer – Cloud Infrastructure (Req. #2551) job opportunity available in Kirkland, WA. Be a key member of the Cloud Infrastructure Systems Engineering team to architect, build and operate the server infrastructure that runs company’s SaaS platform at scale and with high availability.

Mail resume to ServiceNow, Inc., Staffing Department, 4810 Eastgate Mall, San Diego, CA 92121.

Must reference Req. #2551.

Health Care Employment

General Struggling with drug or alcohol addiction?

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SEATTLE Public Auction/ Landlord Lien Foreclosure Sale 1/3/14 at 9 AM. 1959 ANDER 55/10 Mobile Home University Trailer Park Sp. 45, 2200 NE 88 St, Ph: 206-525-7828

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Cellco Partnership and its controlled affiliates doing business as Verizon Wireless is proposing to replace existing antennas and other wireless equipment on the rooftop of a building located at 102 Occidental Avenue South, Seattle, WA 98104.

The overall height of the building including antennas is 104feet. Public comments regarding potential effects from this site on historic properties may be submitted within 30-days from the date of this publication to: Paul Bean, Tetra Tech, Inc., 19803 North Creek Parkway, Bothell, WA 98011, 425-482-7811, paul.bean@tetratech.com.

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Beauty & Health

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SEATTLE WEEKLY • DECEMBER 25 — 31, 2013

Seattle Weekly, one of Seattle’s most respected publications and a division of Sound Publishing, Inc. is seeking an Advertising Sales Consultant. This position will be responsible for print and digital advertising sales to an eclectic and exciting group of clients.

Applicants should be hardworking self-starters, competitive, outgoing and goal- oriented.

The ideal candidates will demonstrate strong written and oral communication skills; work with existing customers and new prospects to grow their business through Seattle Weekly advertising platforms. Sales experience necessary; Media experience is a definite asset. Must be computer-proficient. Position requires use of personal cell phone and vehicle, possession of valid WA State Driver’s License and proof of active vehicle insurance.

We offer a competitive base salary of 24k in addition to commission and a benefits package including health insurance, paid time off (vacation, sick, and holidays), and 401K (currently with an employer match.) Parking is also provided. If you meet the above-noted qualifications and are interested in working for the leading independent newspaper publisher in Washington State, then we want to hear from you! Email us your cover letter and resume to:

Employment General

35

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W W W. S E AT T L E W E E K LY. C O M / S I G N U P ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT NEWSLETTER Find out about upcoming performances, exhibitions, openings and special events.

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(#0 ,-#.35) 5 -"#(!.)(5 - , "5 ./ 35R5 * ,.' (.5) 5 # #( Testosterone & Prostate Study Men are needed to participate in a study looking at the effects of testosterone on the prostate gland. This study will be conducted at the University of Washington, Seattle. It involves the use of two investigational drugs and a prostate biopsy. The study involves 9 visits over a period of 5 months. To be eligible you must be: t ZFBST PG BHF t .BMF t *O HPPE IFBMUI t /PU UBLJOH NFEJDBUJPOT PO B EBJMZ CBTJT 7PMVOUFFST XJMM CF SFJNCVSTFE GPS UIFJS UJNF BOE JODPOWFOJFODF GPS FBDI TUVEZ WJTJU DPNQMFUFE BOE NBZ CF DPNQFOTBUFE VQ UP If interested, call 206.616.1818 (volunteer line) and ask for more information about the PROS-2 study.

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10338 Aurora Ave N, Seattle

DANCING BARE Âť HOT BABES & COLD DRINKS ÂŤ

HAPPY HOUR MONDAY p ½ OFF DOOR 11PM-4PM 2,4,1 TUESDAY p 2 FOR THE PRICE OF 1 @ THE DOOR BOEING RECOGNITION WEDNESDAY p½ OFF DOOR* MICROSOFT RECOGNITION THURSDAY p ½ OFF DOOR* MILITARY FRIDAY p½ OFF DOOR* *I.D. Required American Liberty Adult Store

Select from a variety of DVDs, Mags, and Toys. Buy, Sell, Trade!!!!

Ask Clerk for details about how you can save $$$ on your next purchase.

www.seadancingbare.com OPEN MON-SAT: 11AM - 2:30AM & SUN 2PM - 2:30AM