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Plastic Bag, R.I.P.

Violently bludgeoned by the Seattle City Council, a checkout-stand standby buys the farm.

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he Plastic Grocery Bag faded into the sunset in Seattle on July 1, 2012, gone but not forgotten. After a life spent helping consumers tote goods with greater ease, it was an unceremonious end for a petroleum-based creation that never asked anything in return except able hands to carry it. As with a shortstop from the Dominican Republic, it’s tough to know the Plastic Bag’s exact age. Friends say it looked and acted like a vibrant, carefree, slowly degrading teenager until the days leading up to its untimely passing, murdered by the Seattle City Council. In reality, the Plastic Bag was closer to 52. With European blood running through it, having been birthed by Swedish engineer Sten Gustaf Thulin in the early 1960s, the Plastic Bag entered this world proliferation, contributed to floods in Third World countries, coldly strangled countless at a time of great possibilities, and its life living things, and filled innumerable landfills will shine on as a testament to what can be with masses of lightweight plastic that will accomplished by a dedicated, convenient serlive on long after we’re all dead. vant that’s far cheaper than any of its alternaBut we shouldn’t get caught up in the Plastives. As a youngster, the Plastic Bag carried tic Bag’s excesses or mistakes during this time America’s eggs during the Vietnam War. It of mourning. At its core, the Plastic Bag was was there for Watergate, and it suffered, like designed to help. It carried Seattle’s cereal all registered Republicans and NRA memboxes, Miller Lite, Red Vines, and Diet Coke bers, through the Carter administration. But from the store to the car and the car to the the Plastic Bag truly blossomed in the 1980s. home. In a time of need, when Seattle had no Like many things in that decade, the one else to turn to, the Plastic Bag was there Plastic Bag got big. Perhaps emboldened by for all of us. the iconic leadership The Plastic Bag is of Ronald Reagan, or Print is great, but if you survived by Plastic maybe just because it want to enjoy . . . Six-Pack Rings and the came of age, the Decade our photo slide show commemorating the Styrofoam To-Go Box. of Decadence was good life and times of the Plastic Bag, you’ll In lieu of flowers, please for the Plastic Bag. It have to check out The Daily Weekly. throw something into wore its sunglasses at SEATTLEWEEKLY.COM/DAILYWEEKLY the ocean capable of night, so to speak. It choking a small marine lived it up and prolifanimal. A memorial service will be held for erated, spreading its services all across the globe (and eventually into a handful of Texas- the Plastic Bag at several area corner stores, where its many admirers will remark on how sized trash islands throughout the world’s carrying one’s tallboys will never be the same. oceans). Spuds McKenzie. Coke parties. Glenn Frey solo records. The Plastic Bag saw, MATT DRISCOLL did, and carried it all. Of course, there’s also an unsavory side to the Plastic Bag, one it never shied away from. The Plastic Bag unapologetically killed a “Rob McKenna got it exactly right,” says handful of small children in the United States conservative political consultant Mariana each year; most passed it off as convenience Parks. That might be exactly the opposite at a price. Those close to the Plastic Bag say it of how most people are viewing last week’s never got over being used to pick up dog shit, shocking Supreme Court ruling upholding but it’s tough to know if that’s true. What is Obamacare. But as the political fallout begins, true is the Plastic Bag, through its relentless » Continued on page 9

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news» The Daily Weekly » from page 7 that is the way some Republicans are trying to frame the news. How could they possibly make that argument? Parks, who is working for McKenna’s campaign for governor, looks to the details of the Supreme Court ruling. Yes, the justices upheld the controversial individual mandate to buy insurance—but only by framing the penalty for the noncompliant as a tax. They did not buy President Obama’s position that the mandate was justified by the Commerce Clause of the Constitution. And since McKenna attacked the Commerce Clause rationale (as did other suing attorneys general), Parks reasons, he was validated by the Supreme Court. In a press conference after the ruling, McKenna didn’t say he was right. But he did say “We achieved our goal.” His reasoning was that the Supremes confirmed that “Congress does not have the power of forcing you into the stream of commerce. “ Well, actually, Congress apparently does, as long as the mechanism of coercion is a tax—a word, state Republican chair Kirby Wilbur said, that Obama had “rejected repeatedly in his pitch to the public.” It seems highly unlikely, though, that voters will delve into those distinctions. McKenna lost his challenge—that is going to be the salient point in the Republican attorney general’s gubernatorial bid against Democrat Jay Inslee. Even so, whether that will help or hurt McKenna is not as obvious as it might appear.

But the loss does do one thing for McKenna: It enables him to avoid a backlash. Had the Affordable Care Act been thrown out, says DJ Wilson, president of Wilson Strategic Communications, a public-affairs company focusing on health care, “liberals would have been on fire.” In a state full of them, that might have been even worse news for McKenna. NINA SHAPIRO

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How much money does it take to persuade someone to strap on a backpack loaded with 15 kilos of blow and sneak across the Canadian border at night? A lot, actually. Just after midnight on the evening of June 12, Border Patrol agents spotted four men walking in the tiny town of Sumas, Wash., near “a common crossing point for those seeking to illegally smuggle drugs into the United States,” according to court documents filed earlier this month in Western Washington federal court. The men hid in the brush in a berry field, oblivious to the federal agents observing them from afar. About half an hour later, a silver Volkswagen Passat arrived. When the driver popped the trunk, the men walked up, grabbed something from inside, and started running north toward the border. Three guys managed to get away, but Sergio Rodriguez-Pacheco was less fortunate. Border Patrol agents found him hunkered down in the brush, 30 feet away from a backpack containing “13 kilogram-sized bricks” of cocaine. The feds eventually chased down McKenna lost his challenge—that the Passat, and, though a drug-sniffing “alerted to the scent of narcotis going to be the salient point in dog ics,” the driver, Domingo Villalobosthe Republican attorney general’s Rosas, had already jettisoned his gubernatorial bid against cargo. According to court documents, admitted to investigators that he Democrat Jay Inslee. he was offered a job taking drugs to the border. As for Rodriguez-Pacheco, he allegedly confessed that he knew he was smugThe ruling didn’t settle the matter of the gling drugs, but had no idea what kind. He and Affordable Care Act. Rather, it heated things his three buddies were reportedly told to take up. Republicans, observes Democratic political the bags, run across the border, and deliver consultant Blair Butterworth, “see red meat.” them to a safe house. For this relatively simple Already, presumptive Republican nominee task, he would earn $4,000 cash. Mitt Romney and others are declaring that the To put that figure in perspective, according battle has now shifted to the political arena, to a recent New York Times Magazine story where Republicans will try to repeal the act. on the economics of Mexico’s Sinaloa Cartel, Meanwhile, Butterworth says, “Democrats, in the U.S. that kilo sells for around $30,000. maybe for the first time, are going to have to Assuming the cost per kilo in Canada is in the campaign defending [Obamacare].” $30,000 range, Rodriguez-Pacheco stood to That’s the backdrop against which the collect a relatively sizable 13 percent handling McKenna/Inslee race will play out—one fee for his backpacking services. Of course, he McKenna is already trying to distance himis now in federal custody, charged with conself from. Asked whether he now supports spiracy to distribute cocaine, and unable to repealing the Affordable Care Act, he says no. collect his payment. His anonymous bosses, He calls that scenario “completely politically meanwhile, saw a decent success rate on unrealistic,” and says he supports many protransporting this particular shipment into visions of the act. Canada, since three of Rodriguez-Pacheco’s Yet Butterworth speculates that the polipartners managed to elude the Border Patrol ticking will work against McKenna because and slip off into the night. it will give Inslee “a wedge.” Butterworth According to court documents, Villaloboscontends that the race has not yet produced Rosas declined to divulge to the feds exactly many sharp policy differences between the how much he stood to earn for loaning out two candidates. This, he says, creates one, his car and opening the trunk, but he noted and gives Inslee a chance to show the kind of passion he’s seemed to lack. Says Butterworth “it was enough to make him happy.” KEEGAN of Inslee, “He can say ‘Why the hell were you HAMILTON E doing this in the first place?’ ” news@seattleweekly.com

Seattle weekly • Ju ly 4−10, 2012

AmericA’s Petro-terrorists O

on the demand side, or the loss of Saudi Arabia on the supply end.” And those politicians who were bleating about environmentalists? What they conveniently forgot to mention was that millions of acres had already been approved for drilling in the U.S., but remained untouched. The demand just wasn’t there. The boys on Wall Street must have had a hearty laugh over this. After all, they knew oil prices had ceased to have anything to do with supply and demand. Eight years earlier, they’d been granted the right to make huge, unregulated bets in the oil markets. Now they’d driven gasoline to the brink, just as they had with the mortgage industry. The funniest part: All those finger-pointing politicians were their accomplices. This was an inside job.

Wall Street and Washington conspire to destabilize the U.S. economy, one barrel of oil at a time.

by Pete Kotz

in a price now for a delivery of fuel in January. This allows companies to set their costs and income long-term, so their businesses—and their customers—aren’t regularly blown up by wild price swings. Everyone has a stake in keeping prices stable. Which is why futures had been heavily regulated since the 1930s, when Wall Street last incinerated the U.S. economy. Until then, speculators had regularly terrorized the country by artificially driving up prices and hoarding things like grain. But the stock-market crash of 1929 offered Congress a teachable moment. The men of Wall Street could not be trusted. It wasn’t just their eagerness to screw their fellow countrymen. Their occasional bouts of breathtaking incompetence made them dangerous to themselves as well. So rigorous laws

were enacted to protect both the nation and the banks that ran it. The futures market would be policed for the next 70 years—until that night in 2000, when Phil Gramm handed the keys to Enron, Goldman, and the Kochs. The amendment passed without hearings or public notice. Democrats, practicing their patented brand of acquiescence, were happy to ride shotgun. President Bill Clinton signed it into law. Congress members were “bipartisan, effete snobs who thought they knew better than everybody,” says Mark Cooper. He’s the director of research for the Consumer Federation of America, among the many who warned Washington that it was playing with matches near dynamite. He’d soon be proven spectacularly correct.

Seattle w ee kly • July 4−10, 2012

t happened on the night of December 15, 2000. The country was in tumult over the Bush-Gore election. This diversion offered Republican Senator Phil Gramm of Texas an exquisite opportunity to push American financial stability back 100 years. That evening, Gramm inserted a 262-page amendment into the Commodities Futures Modernization Act. Leaked e-mails would later reveal that it had been written by lobbyists for Enron, Goldman Sachs, and the Koch brothers, Kansas billionaires who would later fund the Tea Party movement. Gramm had turned his office into a subsidiary of Wall Street. From 1997 to 2002, the securities and banking industries had lathered him with $640,000 in campaign contributions. His biggest sugar daddies weren’t from Texas; they were Credit Suisse, Morgan Stanley, Bank of America, and Goldman. And he was more than willing to step-and-fetch-it on their behalf. Big oil, big banks, and big speculators like the Kochs wanted to make monster bets in the futures markets. But they wanted to do it in secrecy— without any government regulation. The futures markets are where the world trades its raw materials, from wheat to oil, coffee to cattle. They were designed not as toys for banks or speculators, but for merchants who actually use those products. Before a farmer plants his oats in the spring, he can agree to sell them to Kellogg’s at a set price come fall, just as Southwest Airlines can lock

Peter ryan

n July 11, 2008, the price of oil rose to $147 per barrel, a record high. Gas stations engaged in hot pursuit as the price of a gallon rocketed past $4. All hell was about to break loose. The country’s largest banks had already begun to implode through arrogance and ineptitude. Now the oil market had moved in with a thundering uppercut. Airlines and trucking firms watched their costs punch through the roof. So did every other business great and small, since 90 percent of American goods are shipped in some form or another. “That was the breaking point of the economy,” says Tyson Slocum, director of the energy program at Public Citizen, a Washington, D.C., government watchdog group. “That’s when businesses said they could no longer fuel their trucks, and that fuel costs were overwhelming their payroll.” So began a surge of layoffs that would push well into the next year. America’s political leaders could only muster a simpleton’s response. Demand had outstripped supply, they claimed. And it was all the fault of radical environmentalists. If they’d only let us drill for more riches offshore—or on protected lands in Alaska—we could all go back to cranking Toby Keith in our Chevy Tahoes. It was a fabulous, made-for-TV narrative. Who can forget Sarah Palin shaking her fist at the Republican convention that September, exhorting the legions to “Drill, baby, drill!” What began as a rallying cry soon became an article of faith at cafes and kitchen tables, executive suites and editorial meetings. There was just one tiny problem: Absolutely none of it was true. In four short years, the price of oil had risen nearly 400 percent. For this to be a natural occurrence, it would have required a sudden, massive increase in world oil consumption, coupled with equally massive shortages in production. None of which had happened. “I asked the senior official at Goldman [Sachs] at the time. There were no supply-and-demand issues that could remotely explain the doubling and doubling again of oil prices,” says Dennis Kelleher, a former international securities lawyer. “In order to justify that, it would literally take the discovery of China

» Continued on page 12 11

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the red tape and paperwork garroting small business, the nation’s largest and most stable employer. But his disciples took it as a onesize-fits-all theory. The people benefiting most were those who could afford to buy senators like Phil Gramm. Deregulation of the futures markets would solely serve America’s greatest welfare queens, Big Oil and Big Finance. Over the years both had purchased competitive advantages from Congress, making a mockery of the free market. America’s five largest oil companies receive $20 billion in welfare annually, largely through tax breaks afforded to no other industry. Big Financiers pay half the personal tax rates of their brethren at community banks. Even after buying off the umpires, they still couldn’t stand on their own two feet. “Nine of the largest financial institutions in the world failed” in 2008, says William Black, a former bank regulator-turned-economist at the University of Missouri-Kansas City. “That should petrify people. All of them pulled the pin on their own grenades.”

Gramm’s amendment became known as the “Enron Loophole,” named for the criminal empire that was then America’s seventh-largest company. Though Enron would soon crumble in a heap of avarice and fraud, Gramm & co. had unleashed the parasites, allowing them to prey on American commerce. Prior to the change, speculators were generally kept to no more than 30 percent of any given market. Anything beyond that became dangerous. That’s because they have no concern for the things they’re buying or the people who use them. They’re simply betting on price swings. The more volatile the market, the more money they make. Most sell well before they’ll ever take delivery of, say, a load of sugar. Yet Congress had set them free. Banks like JP Morgan and Lehman began to rally large, institutional investors to bet on oil. It took them just five years to pervert the market’s very purpose. By 2005, they’d set off a buying frenzy that launched prices into the stratosphere. “Every time the economy starts Sherri Stone, vice president to show signs of rising, the oil of the Petroleum Marketers Association of America, likens speculators jump in,” says Joseph it to buying a home. Under norKennedy II, a former congressman mal conditions of supply and from Massachusetts. “They suck demand, you might have a few the life out of the economy.” other people bidding for the same house. “But with speculaWhen the economy collapsed, speculation, now you have 200 other people bidding tors found themselves with a small problem: for that house. You’re going to pay an enorNo one could afford to buy gas. In just a few mous price for this house.” short months, the price plunged from $147 to By the time the economy began to collapse $30 a barrel. in the summer of 2008, speculators had corSome good came from this. President Barack nered a stunning 81 percent of the oil market. Obama would soon follow Sarah Palin’s charge, Some had even begun to hoard fuel, just as increasing drilling in the U.S. He also strongrobber barons had done a century before. armed Detroit into producing more fuelOlav Refvik, a top trader at Morgan Stanley, efficient cars as part of their bailout. became known as the “King of New York Finally, the simple fact that we’re still Harbor” because he was leasing so much broke four years later has caused U.S. constorage space. sumption to steadily decline. Today, America Yet the bankers’ incompetence would once exports more oil than it imports for the first again prove dangerous to themselves and time since the 1940s. everyone else. They’d already sabotaged the Yet the heirs to Phil Gramm have done housing market. Artificially high fuel prices their best to protect speculators, hosing were the second prong of their attack. the nation in the process. “Every time the The U.S. economy was officially in free fall. economy starts to show signs of rising, the oil speculators jump in,” says Joseph Kennedy hink of Wall Street banks as not II, a former congressman from Massachumuch different than your neighsetts. “They suck the life out of the economy.” borhood bookie. After all, there’s As analysts spoke of recovery in April 2011, little difference between betting the price of gasoline approached the $4 mark. on Starbucks stock or a Dodgers game. The smart ones realize they can make a handsome The wicked swings had resumed. Last spring, it topped out once more at $3.96 a gallon. living just sitting back, wisely setting odds, But this time it had become difficult to and making a killing off the transaction fees. screech about environmentalists or supply But what separates the two is that bankand demand with a straight face. Even the ers violate a cardinal rule of the bookmaking banks were confessing their sins. An analyst trade: They’re degenerate gamblers themfor Goldman Sachs admitted that banks like selves. And history says they’re very much in his had added an artificial 40 percent to the need of adult supervision. In just the past 25 years, the financial indus- price of a barrel. Everyone from the Federal Reserve to the CEO of ExxonMobil has contry has gone from the savings-and-loan crisis ceded much the same. to the tech-stock bubble to the accountingThat led Bart Chilton to do a little math. He’s fraud scandals to the mortgage-industry collapse. Pepper in a ceaseless string of criminal- a commissioner with the Commodity Futures Trading Commission, which is supposed to ity—from Drexel Burnham Lambert to MF oversee oil trading. By his calculations, the Global—and you realize the industry has rouowner of a Honda Civic is sending $7.30 to JP tinely set off large bombs in the U.S. economy Morgan and men like the Kochs every time she for a quarter-century. fills her tank. For an F-150 pickup owner, the Worse: The pattern is accelerating. banker fee is $14.56 a tank. This reign of depravity just happens to Chilton believes the annual cost to the correspond with deregulation, the legacy of trucking industry is a whopping $29.1 billion. Ronald Reagan. Surely he was right to reduce

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America’s Petro-Terrorists » from PAge 11

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he late 1980s were a quaint period, when admirals of finance were still eligible for punishment under criminal law. Savings and loans were collapsing, just as their larger counterparts would 20 years later, pillaged by executive incompetence and fraud. So federal prosecutors did something that would never happen today: They convicted

1,000 of the biggest and worst offenders. They also filed some 800,000 civil suits, and banned sleazebags from ever working in banking again. But Washington didn’t grasp the bloodbath’s obvious lesson: Bankers still couldn’t be trusted. Reagan’s “Government Bad, Private Sector Good” mantra had become the nation’s official business plan. Instead of watching the wicked more closely, deregulation allowed Big Finance to rampage untethered. By the time George W. Bush reached office, the philosophy was so entrenched that, without fanfare or any official change in law, the feds decided that Wall Street basically had immunity under fraud statutes. That was clear by the early 2000s, when accounting fraud became the height of fashion in executive suites across the land. The feds would prosecute the most egregious chieftains at WorldCom, Tyco, and Adelphia. But some of the country’s biggest names were caught rigging their books as well, firms like Merck, Halliburton, and AOL. All were allowed to walk. The game had become fully rigged. Economist Black, author of The Best Way to Rob a Bank is to Own One, says there are one million law enforcement officers in America today. Only 1,300 are devoted to white-collar crime. Most police departments don’t have a single detective working the country-club set. When Enron imploded under the largest fraud in Texas history, the Houston PD was

Michael Forester

For airlines: $9.8 billion. That means every time you fly, every time you buy an apple or a beer, the nation’s thirstiest welfare queens take a cut. Stone, of the Petroleum Marketers Association, which represents 8,000 convenience stores and oil wholesalers, says your neighborhood gas station doesn’t get a piece of anything. Typically, a gas station makes just seven cents a gallon, all of which is eaten up by credit-card fees. Yet it’s the elderly who take the greatest beating. In 1979, Joe Kennedy founded Citizens Energy, a nonprofit that provides heating oil to the poor and aged in 22 states. Three years ago, it cost $1,200 per winter to heat a normal house. Today it’s $4,000, he says. To hear Kennedy tell it, Gramm’s amendment shouldn’t be called the “Enron Loophole.” It should be known as the “Let’s Try to Starve Grandma Act.” Osama bin Laden could only have dreamed of causing such widespread damage to the U.S. economy. But both parties in Congress remain willing to protect Wall Street at all costs—even if it means terrorizing the country. “We’re going right back to the robberbaron days,” says Kennedy. “And it’s eating away at our heart and soul.”

William Black, former bank regulatorturned-economist at the University of Missouri-Kansas City: “People can’t conceive of a world without these massive institutions, and can’t believe they’re a negative influence.”

busy rousting check-bouncers. With local investigations rare and the feds purposefully averting their gaze, bankers were allowed to take down the housing market in a scheme 70 times the magnitude of the savings-and-loan collapse. “Wall Street is a high-crime area in which we basically have no cops on the beat,” says former securities lawyer Dennis Kelleher,

head of Better Markets, a nonprofit devoted to protecting taxpayers from the too-big-tofail crowd. One might expect this to have occurred under George W., who made no bones that his presidency was all about aiding his fellow trust-fund swells. But it would only get worse under the self-styled change agent, Barack Obama. The appointment of Attorney General Eric Holder said it all. He’d been a partner at the law firm of Covington & Burling, whose clients included Goldman, JP Morgan, Citigroup, and Bank of America. The year before he joined the Obama administration, he made $2.5 million through fees from the very people he was supposed to prosecute. Even more comical: Lanny Breuer was named head of the Justice Department’s criminal division. He’d previously chaired the white-collar defense unit at Covington. Prosecutions on Wall Street slammed to a halt. Black estimates that at the height of the mortgage crisis, two million fraudulent loans were being written each year, largely through lenders inflating buyers’ incomes. But not a single major figure was ever prosecuted. Had those 1,000 savings-and-loan criminals from the 1980s practiced their larceny under Bush II or Obama, they would have been given million-dollar bonuses and retired to beach homes in the Hamptons. It was under these pleasant skies that oil speculators launched their attack on America. In 2008, when their assault became evident, even some Republicans called for investigations. But that quickly ended when Obama became president. Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell,

» ContinUed on Page 14

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This was Obama’s grand plan to finally strike a blow against our enemies within. But while the announcement came with fireworks, these new crimefighters would meet just a few times over the next year. Malevolence uncovered: zero. “Anybody who looks at the non-activity of that working group knows that the only fraud was in naming it,” says Kelleher. “I think their non-record speaks for itself.” Some senators like Sherrod Brown of Ohio and Bernie Sanders of Vermont have pushed earnestly for the feds to step in. But Republicans say they’ll block any move against Wall Street—with swing-state Democrats there to serve the appetizers. “There’s a free-market philosophy that continues to exist,” says Mark Williams, a former Federal Reserve examiner now at Boston University. “If you’re a trader, you should have the right to trade. But if the greater community is harmed, you shouldn’t have that

not one for subtlety, announced that his party’s Mission One was sabotaging Obama. Democrats managed to pass the DoddFrank Act in 2010. One of its goals was to hand the oil market back to actual users and allow the feds to crack down on excess speculation. Kennedy believes this alone would have reduced the price of gas by $1 a gallon. But after Congress announced its great triumph over Wall Street, it quietly teamed with bankers to gut the law. The Commodity Futures Trading Commission, which was supposed to spearhead the crackdown, saw its budget slashed. Speculators filed suit, essentially arguing that they had the inalienable right to violate the country. The financial industry would eventually spend $100 million to stave off regulation, buying congressmen, setting up fake public-interest groups, and “If you’re a trader, you should have funding academics to produce the right to trade. But if the greater laughable studies. Two years community is harmed, you shouldn’t after Dodd-Frank passed, the feds have yet to touch a single have that right. We still live in a hair on a speculator’s head. democracy, right?” The propaganda campaign has worked. “What they’ve right. We still live in a democracy, right?” really won is the intellectual struggle,” says Michael Greenberger, a law professor at Black. “People can’t conceive of a world the University of Maryland and a former without these massive institutions, and can’t director at the Commodity Futures Trading believe they’re a negative influence.” Take the Tea Party movement. Its followers Commission, is among the few who believe a reprieve is in store. He believes Wall Street’s are largely concentrated in the red states, starelentless ineptitude may finally do it in. Two tistically the nation’s poorest and thus most months ago, JP Morgan was the latest to set easily damaged by high gas prices. Yet their itself aflame. One of its traders managed to greatest benefactors, the Koch brothers, have gamble away $2 billion in just a few weeks. boasted of being among the top five speculaThe damage is expected to reach $7 billion or tors in the world. So while Tea Partiers rally more by the time the cinders go out. “The JP against regulation and government interferMorgan episode really struck at the nerve of ence, the Kochs steal $14 from them every the American psyche about banks and what time they fill up their Fords. kind of damage they can do,” says Green“This is all part of the same formula of berger. “These people who are doing nothing lower taxes and less regulation,” says Kenproductive for the economy are walking away nedy. “That formula wins elections and ruins and, even in failure, collecting millions and the country.” millions of dollars.” Then again, the same people have been s gas prices neared $4 this spring, doing the same thing for 25 years. Yet reguRepublicans reprised their Great lation just keeps getting weaker. “You will Campaign of Idiocy from 2008. know that somebody’s serious when they put Once again environmentalists 500 FBI agents and a dozen of our best prosand liberals were to blame, this time for ecutors on Wall Street,” says Kelleher. blocking construction of the Keystone PipeIn the meantime, it could all get a lot worse line, a massive project that would allow the if Mitt Romney is elected. Even after the JP shipping of oil from Canada to Texas. Morgan fiasco, he reiterated his plan to repeal Presidential aspirants Newt Gingrich and Dodd-Frank, which also contains measures Michele Bachmann claimed they’d lower gas guarding against future bank bailouts. prices to $2 if elected, presumably by magic. Writes Politico: “Romney’s reaction is the Congressman Paul Ryan of Wisconsin, considequivalent of putting out a small fire in your ered the party’s brightest financial mind, prohouse, then deciding that the lesson is you posed cutting the Commodity Futures Trading need to stuff your house with matches, throw Commission’s staff by two-thirds, just in case out your fire extinguisher, and cancel your they might decide to grab coffee in the general fire insurance. And doing all this after the vicinity of Wall Street. Mitch McConnell said he’d be happy to address speculation—but only house nearly burned to the ground less than four years ago.” if Democrats agreed to allow drilling on enviThese days, the oil market has again begun ronmentally sensitive lands. to dive—through no help from our leaders. A “They believe nothing was wrong with the stalled Chinese economy plus fears of serial markets in 2008,” says Cooper of the Conbank crashes in Europe have caused speculasumer Federation. tors to scatter. Prevailing theory: The world Obama, meanwhile, was doing an inverse may soon be too broke to buy gas. impression of Teddy Roosevelt: Instead of But at some point, the economy will walking softly and carrying a big stick, he show signs of recovery. And Washington brayed noisily and brandished a twig. has ensured that the speculators will return, When gas prices approached $4 in April there to suffocate it in its infancy. E 2011, the president announced the creation of the Oil and Gas Price Fraud Working Group. news@seattleweekly.com

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the»weekly»wire America’s Cup despite being vastly outspent. And they’ll host the next America’s Cup during Seafair using little radio-controlled sailboats in the Green Lake children’s wading pool. It’s a fact. It’s a Seafair Pirate Fact.™ Alki Beach, 1702 Alki Ave. S.W., seafair. com. Free. 9:30 a.m. BRIAN MILLER

tues/7/3 SPORTS/TV

Ride to the Sea

sat/7/7

Historical Reach on the Beach

Hail the Conquering Hero

Though Seattle Sounders coach Sigi Schmid doesn’t seem like the sentimental type, he could stage-direct a perfectly Frank Capra-esque moment by bringing Steve Zakuani in for tonight’s match against the Colorado Rapids: It was against the Rapids, on April 22, 2011, that Zakuani’s leg was broken by an overzealous tackle by Brian Mullan, putting the popular midfielder out of commission for a year filled with palpitating speculation about his return (and anguished what-ifs over the Sounders’ ignominious early exit from last fall’s playoffs). Though he played in a reserve match on June 1 and made the 18-man active roster for the June 20 game against Kansas City, #11 has (as of this writing) seen no minutes in MLS play. How poetically just, how Greek-drama it would be if his home-field return came facing the team which has become nearly as loathed among fans as Portland’s. CenturyLink Field, 800 Occidental Ave. S., soundersfc.com. $30–$115. 8 p.m. GAVIN BORCHERT

THURS: FILM

She’s Got Moxie

Jean Arthur is one of the screen’s greats. From her breakthrough in the mid-’30s (after a decade plugging away in minor roles) to her 1953 big-screen farewell in Shane, she was the modern urban woman, the girl next door, and the sardonic smart cookie—all rolled into a snappy, sassy, adorable package. While Arthur (1900–1991) could be glamorous, she was most successful as a comedienne and most memorable playing practical, savvy women who toss all caution to the wind and dive headlong into the unknown. Her fast-talking patter, trilling laugh, and sunny charisma made her a natural screwball star and a perfect leading lady for the Depression era. SAM’s six-film retrospective begins tonight with her 1935 star turn in John Ford’s snappy

Arthur in a glamorous, undated publicity shot.

mon/7/9 FILM

From the Scullery to the Stars

SAM

This summer’s Silent Movie Mondays series is all about “Opulence & Epics,” and it launches with the 1929 British music-hall drama Piccadilly, starring Anna May Wong as a scullery worker promoted from kitchen staff to exotic star attraction. Though second-billed to Gilda Gray, who plays the displaced “over the hill” dancer, Wong steals the film from her entrance, shimmying on the counter of a basement kitchen in a mock nightclub routine to the delight of her fellow workers. The rest is a sophisticated take on a backstage melodrama of jealousies and rivalries, with lavish sets, lots of atmosphere, and a terrific early turn by Charles Laughton as a rowdy patron. Organist Jim Riggs provides live musical accompaniment for both the evening series and—new this year—lunchtime matinee screenings. (Yes, you can bring your food inside.) Today’s early program includes Charlie Chaplin’s great The

comedy The Whole Town’s Talking. She plays a hardheaded career gal opposite Edward G. Robinson’s meek clerk, who’s mistaken for a wanted gangster. Running Thursdays through August 9, the “Queen of Screwball” series also features You Can’t Take It With You, The Talk of the Town, The More the Merrier, and A Foreign Affair. Of special note is the comic discovery If You Could Only Cook (July 12), in which Arthur’s moxie and snap charms an auto-company president and a gangster. Who could blame them? Seattle Art Museum, 1300 First Ave., 654-3121, seattleartmuseum.org. $35–$39 series, $8 individual. 7:30 p.m. SEAN AXMAKER

Seattle w ee kly • July 4−10, 2012

Pasties and Patriotism

SPORTS

COURTESY OF THE ARTISTS

Tour de France viewing parties typically mean you, a party of one, sitting before the TV or computer screen. It’s a lonely obsession, shared by a few at traffic lights or on the Burke-Gilman Trail. (“How about Contador’s attack on the Tourmalet?” “He broke his collarbone in how many places?”) But for those with a generous lunch hour, there’s a more social option at the new bike shop in Nord Alley (just east of First between Jackson and Main). Back Alley Bike Repair is launching a TV recap gathering it calls Le Tour d’ Alley, which runs weekdays through July 20 (except The Freedom crew July 4, 10, and 17—the latter two dates in their patriotic regalia. being rest days, but you knew that already). Maybe you can’t make every screening, but we recommend you bring your Door, 216 Union St., 838-4333, thetripledoor. takeout lunch today to watch the rolling and net. $22–$25. 7:30 & 10:30 p.m. (Repeats Fri. potentially windy stage three from Orchies & Sat.) SANDRA KURTZ to Boulogne-sur-Mer. At only 197 kilometers (about 120 miles), the route runs west to the coast, just south of Calais, where ocean breezes and a twisty, bumpy finale await. Just as the peloton has likely caught the day’s escapees, there are four unwelcome little climbs in the last 16 clicks. The sprint finish SEAFAIR is uphill: 700 meters at a 7.4 percent grade, which may defeat Wenatchee’s Tyler Farrar and Englishman Mark Cavendish (aka “The Manx Missile”). Instead, look for Spaniards Samuel Sánchez and Alejandro Valverde and In a ceremony to be repeated today, the the Belgian Philippe Gilbert to be in the mix. Seafair Pirates first landed at Alki Beach with And if you already know the results, put a the Denny party in 1851. Hydroplane racing burrito in it. Back Alley Bike Repair, 314 First immediately followed the festivities, though Ave. S., 307-1179, backalleybikerepair.com. Free. Chief Sealth actually won that race by pad11:30 a.m.–1:30 p.m. BRIAN MILLER dling his cedar canoe. On hand to cheer were JP Patches, Ivar Haglund, and Jimi Hendrix. Afterward, the Blue Angels—then comprisSTAGE ing only Wilbur and Orville Wright and their pedal-powered aircraft—flew over the city, which promptly burned to the ground. DurAmong their many other talents, burlesque ing the massive rebuilding effort, our proud performers are skilled multitaskers. They’re Alaskan Way Viaduct was erected and Jim stripping and dancing, stripping and singMcDermott began his first term in Congress. ing, and, in Freedom Fantasia , stripping and Didn’t you know any of this? More people roller-skating. J. Von Stratton, usually with should study our local history, rich in piratethe Atomic Bombshells, will be rolling across related lore. For instance, the Seafair Pirates the stage alongside a roster of Seattle’s best were in the vanguard of the Normandy Beach burlesque performers in a tongue-firmly-inlandings during World War II. The Titanic’s cheek salute to the United States. Also featurlucky few survivors were rescued by Seafair ing Ben de la Creme, Lou Henry Hoover, and Pirates. When the wrecked Exxon Valdez was Kitten LaRue, the show is indeed full of glitgushing oil in Prince William Sound in ’89, to ter. But underneath the fabulousness, there’s help begin the cleanup, a single Seafair Pirate real dancing going on—including the big pulled the supertanker off the rocks using musical number “Apple Pie Parade,” which his own beard! When Melville went to sea to Hoover (aka Ricki Mason) compares to Seven research what would become Moby-Dick, he Brides for Seven Brothers. That some of the actually cribbed most of his material from brides are men and some of the brothers the Seafair Pirates. More recently, the Seafair women simply furthers the cause of liberty— Pirates defeated billionaire Larry Ellison in the for the show and for our nation. The Triple

Immigrant and Georges Méliès’ landmark A Trip to the Moon (recently celebrated in Martin Scorsese’s Hugo). The evening series continues with L’Argent, the original 1925 Ben-Hur, and Cecil B. DeMille’s lavish The King of Kings. Also look for more Chaplin and Buster Keaton among the coming daytime shows. (Through July 30.) The Paramount, 911 Pine St., 877-7844849, stgpresents.org. $10 evening, $5 matinee. Noon & 7 p.m. SEAN AXMAKER

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arts»Stage »REVIEW

A Menu You Can’t Refuse

Nobody expects a plot at a TZZ show. But could there be a no-dinner ticket option?

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hose who maintain that Teatro ZinZanni is a racket are officially correct now that mobsters have seized der Spiegeltent as their hideout. What more appropriate theme for this stunt-studded, five-course cabaret shakedown than organized crime? Improv cutup and TZZ regular Frank Ferrante is back as Caesar, who has gambled away the tent to Big Sam Kinkaid, a zoot-suited homme fatale mob boss (also played by Ferrante). Surrounded by over-the-top minions and molls, Kinkaid’s reluctant reunion with his long-lost amore Myrna (Dietrich-like beauty Dreya Weber) loosely binds about half the scenes of the “story” (credited to Ferrante and Weber; Norman Langill directs). The rest of Gangsters in Love is a grab-bag variety show, with live music by Francine Reed and the witty and spontaneous Orchestra DeVille. The Rough Guide to TZZ: Not all seats are created equal. There is a major comfort and price differential between the tables on the main floor and the shared, eight-person general-admission booths around the edges. Sight lines can be terrible on the periphery; as a result, you may need a neck massage the next day. The benches are high and shallow, which left my dangling legs numb and freezing. Still, these are small inconveniences considering you’re sitting in a gorgeous, century-old Belgian “mirror tent” with intricate woodwork and rich velvet decor. While munching the first course (which turned out to be the best, a muffin-sized savory tart with cheese and mushrooms garnished with pickled vegetables), we meet the sinewy, helium-voiced Andrea Conway Doba as Mitzi, who’s soon swinging from the chandelier. In the following vignettes, she’s pursued by gangster suitors vying for her attention. Among them, Joe De Paul makes the most of his paunchy shortness in a funny strip routine, and Wayne Doba does an endearingly gentle “Mr. Bojangles” tap dance that stole many hearts, including mine. The most visually memorable acts were Ben Wendel and Rachel Nehmer’s trapeze work and the lovely Ms. Weber singing and swinging on a rope in a nude body suit. A less successful glamour scene puts four rock-hard ladies in Josephine Baker–style banana dresses. Their rendition of “I’ve Never Seen a Straight Banana” is decidedly unsexy but quite funny. Down among the dinner tables, per TZZ custom, Ferrante roams the audience for victims to (willingly) humiliate. During my show, MARK KITAOKA

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De Paul’s hoodlum pines (and strips) for Conway Doba’s trapeze artist.

he plucked a man and woman from separate tables and had them taste soup from a gigantic spoon—then commanded them to kiss each other while the audience roared. In his popular contest segment, in which three patrons endure various mortifications, he taunted one long-haired volunteer, “Jesus Christ! You’re eating for 12 now!” While the acts start slow and get better, chef Erik Carlson’s food declines steadily. The lobster vichyssoise was a corn-flavored chowder thick with undercooked flour—though slightly redeemed by a dollop of orange caviar. The Waldorf salad had pleasant elements (walnuts, apples, grapes, strawberries) with nothing to say to one another. (The solution? Drown them in in white dressing.) Clearly, food is not the priority here. And since each time I leaned toward the plate I blocked my tablemates’ view of the show, I wound up eating lightly. My friend’s “Sassy Myrna Malloy” cocktail ($12) was a peachy sweet/ sour purr. Our competent waiter, understandably frustrated by having to serve under difficult conditions, seemed a bit oppressed. The waitstaff earn every cent of their gratuity. At a little over three hours, plus milling time in the curiosity-shop lobby, Gangsters makes for a leisurely evening, with plenty of pauses to chat between acts. During these lulls, you’re always guessing what piebald surprise will come next. The show shifts in a blink from a juggler on a shaky six-tier platform to an audience member being fitted for cement shoes. And if the menu doesn’t delight, think of the food premium as protection money: We pay that price to let the show go on. E stage@seattleweekly.com TEATRO ZINZANNI: GANGSTERS OF LOVE Teatro ZinZanni, 222 Mercer St., 802-0015. $106 and up. Runs Wed.–Sun.; see zinzanni.org for exact schedule. Ends Sept. 30.

JULY 2012 | SEATTLE WEEKLY’S MUSIC REVIEW

SEATTLEWEEKLY.COM/REVERBMONTHLY | FREE

By Chris Kornelis Page 6

S ’ R R E UNN T E M IN E H

The little device keeping little bands from a big audience.

— THE RADIO ISSUE —

Reve r b • Seat tle weekly • Ju ly 4−1 0, 2012

opening acts »July 2012 VOLUME 2 | NUMBER 7 » SEATTLEWEEKLY.COM/REVERBMONTHLY

»EDITOR’S LETTER

The Report Card

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TUE, JUL 3 • 9PM ~ $6

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TUE, JUL 10 • 9PM ~ $6

DECEPTION PAST

1 UPPERS

LOCAL POP & ROCK

POMERANTZ

ckornelis@seattleweekly.com

inside»

4 DIVERSIONS

BY DAVID STOESZ | Why it no longer

matters if radio sucks.

ROCK ‘N’ ROLLING ALL NIGHT LONG

LOS CABALLOS LOCOS A TRIBUTE TO NEIL YOUNG

6 PEOPLE METERS

BY CHRIS KORNELIS | New ways of tracking what you really listen to make it harder for you to hear anything new.

»cover credit PHOTO OF PPM: COURTESY OF ARBITRON

LOCAL POP & INDIE ROCK

ROAMING HERDS OF BUFFALO

THE BUILDERS AND THE BUTCHERS

CHATHAM COUNTY LINE TBA

RIVER GIANT

BRINGING A ROCK ‘N’ ROLL SENSIBILITY TO ROOTS MUSIC

TIMES LISTED ARE SHOW TIMES. DOORS OPEN 30-60 MINUTES BEFORE

»reverb monthly

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CLOUD WAR (FORMERLY BROTHER BEAR) COPYRIGHT © 2012 BY SEATTLE WEEKLY, LLC. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. REPRODUCTION IN WHOLE OR IN PART WITHOUT PERMISSION IS PROHIBITED. ISSN 0898 0845 • REVERB IS PUBLISHED MONTHLY BY SEATTLE WEEKLY, LLC. SEATTLE WEEKLY® IS A REGISTERED TRADEMARK. 1008 WESTERN AVE., STE. 300, SEATTLE, WA 98104. • FOUNDED 1976.

MONDAY SQUARE DANCE FEAT. MUSIC BY

SAT, JUL 7 • 9:30PM ~ $10 ADV / $12 DOS

BY JOHN RODERICK | Advice for radio-

heads: Calabro, Waters, and more. BY RACHEL BELLE | Dealing with life on the anonymity/celebrity cusp.

PETER BUCK OF R.E.M. (SEATED SHOW)

ELBA THE JESUS REHAB

The latest from OCNotes, Posse, and more.

From Dirty Projectors to Photosynthesis 5.

KEVN KINNEY

STITCH IN TIME - TRIBUTE TO THE CULT: ELECTRIC FRIEL’S COMET - ACE FREHLEY / KISS TRIBUTE

10 REVIEWS

17 THE MONTH AHEAD

SUN, JUL 8 • 8:30PM ~ $10 ADV / $12 DOS

LOCAL COUNTRY MUSIC

U& PMING: COMIN

7/12 WHITING TENNIS, GHOST OF KYLE BRADFORD, GHOSTS I’VE MET 7/13 BLACK WHALES, THE WEST, POSSE 7/14 Take Warning presents THE PIETASTERS, THE GEORGETOWN ORBITS, SKABLINS 7/15 DRUNKEN PRAYER, CASEY RUFF & THE MAYORS OF BALLARD, THORNTON CREEK 7/16 STEVE POLTZ, JENN GRINELS 7/18 THE FAREWELL DRIFTERS, THE WEATHERSIDE WHISKEY BAND, CREEPING TIME 7/19 PANAMA GOLD, TICKTOCKMAN, THE MOTHERSHIP 7/20 LOST DOGMA album release show, WHISKEY SYNDICATE, THE BIG MEDICINE 7/21 DIEGO’S UMBRELLA, JONNY SONIC, ETERNAL FAIR 7/23 MONDAY SQUARE DANCE with THE TALLBOYS 7/24 The Tractor & KBCS 91.3FM present LUCY MICHELLE & THE VELVET LAPELLES, TEN-SPEED MUSIC, VALLEY FAIR 7/25 CHARLIE PARR, RORY JAMES AND THE MAJESTIC, THE BLACKBERRY BUSHES STRINGBAND 7/27 FORT UNION album release show, CATALDO

Reve r b • Seattle w ee kly • JUN E J u ly 4−10, 2012

I’m gonna go out on a limb and assume that most of you have never heard of a PPM, and few of you have spent much time thinking about page views. So allow me to explain the two in terms we all understand: They’re report cards. Radio uses a PPM (Portable People Meter) to gauge success, while newspapers (among other media) base much of theirs on page views. As I reported on radio’s switch from a “diary” system of audience tracking to the PPM (“The Meter’s Running,” page 6) and how it’s changed the way success is measured, I couldn’t shake the feeling that I was writing about the way newspapers have adapted to the Internet era, and our business’ own concepts of success and sustainability. In the old days, newspapers were printed and editors assumed they knew what readers read. Meanwhile, DJs spun records and stations thought they knew who was listening and when. Yet our modern-day report cards tell us these highly presumptive methodologies were wrong. Radio programmers now know that they get higher marks when they favor familiar records, even if it means some of their favorite bands get left behind. Newspaper professionals know that celebrity gossip, scandal, crime, extreme weather, and lists keep the page views coming, even if it means some important smaller stories get left uncovered (to be fair, dramatic staff reductions have contributed to this phenomenon). So should we both be giving our customers more of what our report cards say they want? “A combination of art and science” is the way longtime radio programmer Chris Mays says she approaches her job. That’s also a good way to explain how editors and reporters approach theirs: mixing a balance of what’s popular with as much of what’s important as possible. But like our colleagues in radio, when we need a bump in our grades, we reach for what we know works: the familiar, the hits, the lists. Are we Dumpster-diving, or giving our audience what it really wants? The answer is somewhat irrelevant: Page views and the PPM don’t recognize the difference. —Chris Kornelis, Editor, Reverb Monthly

distractions&diversions» DIG MY MOOD

Hot Airwaves Radio’s irrelevant irrelevance. BY DAVID STOESZ

f you’re interested in current pop music, there’s only one radio station: 94.1 KMPS. Sure, there’s MOViN’ 92.5, KISS, and KUBE 93, but they all play the same dozen or so songs—by Rihanna, Adele, fun., and LMFAO (or whoever it is this month). They differ only in that some play marginally more hip-hop than others. For a coherent, broadbased pop-music scene, there’s only KMPS. Yes, I know KMPS is a “country” station, but the affiliation is purely ideological—some token fiddles and steel guitars are thrown on top of generic pop arrangements to mark them as Caucasian, i.e., not “urban,” and in all ways the opposite of hip-hop. There’s no

connection between today’s smirking bodybuilders in cowboy hats and the nervous, skinny guys like Hank Williams and Jimmie Rodgers who invented country. It may be a golden age for “country” (witness the Gorgefilling Watershed Music Festival in August, and the high ratings of country radio), but it’s got nothing to do with country. But this isn’t an original observation, and the larger question is: Who gives a shit? When KMPS is as good as it gets for commercial radio, why bother? Is radio one of those things we’re supposed to worry about, like record stores and the future of publishing? Fuck that. Life’s too short. And humans will never stop making music

RING MY BELLE

or telling stories in one form or another. These things are not delicate little hothouse flowers. That’s why I have no compunction about retiring to a realm of pure musical delight: Spotify. Not to turn into a commercial for this streaming-music service, but if there’s anything more perfect, I can’t even imagine it, much less name it. You can listen to virtually anything you want, wherever you want, free from all physical clutter. This month I’m gorging on Webb Pierce, Buck Owens, the Louvin Brothers, and other giants of country you’ll never hear on the radio. (OK, you might possibly hear them on KEXP.) Speculating about the music industry’s future ranks with recycling committee meetings for thrill value. But from where I sit (in traffic, blasting honky-tonk), it seems the battle has been fought and won. By listeners. Those who want nonstop pop from the same four artists have your pick of any number of stations in town. The rest of us have Spotify. There’s no need to hang the DJ anymore. He’s us. E music@seattleweekly.com

ANSWERS/ADVICE

Blow Harder

Taking questions from some of the city’s loudest, most invisible talking heads. BY JOHN RODERICK

For this month’s installment of Answers/ Advice, we solicited questions from a few of local radio’s most prolific pontificators.

Reve r b • Seat tle weekly • Ju ly 4−1 0, 2012

I love to golf, and even more so, love to golf barefoot. Are there any other summer activities you’d recommend doing barefoot? —Kevin Calabro, host of The Kevin Calabro Show on 710 ESPN Seattle Roderick: This is a question

that could best be answered by Matthew McConaughey, so I’m going to turn it over to him: “Hey, bro-dog, big high-five on the barefoot-activities question. Every day that I don’t have to put on flip-flops is a day I know I’m living in grace. But let me turn that question around: Why are barefoot activities only confined to summer? Our forefathers and mothers were barefoot all the time, which is why their connection to the Earth was so strong! I don’t like to give advice, because advice is just fear, but since you asked: Everything is better barefoot, from eating fish tacos to making love on the beach in Madagascar. Set yourself free, my bro-master, and join me on the beach of life.” —Matthew McConaughey What does it mean if I’m annoyed at the racket the teenagers are making playing basketball outside my window right now at 10 p.m. on a weeknight? Certainly not that I’m a cranky curmudgeon? —Cheryl Waters, host of The Midday Show on 90.3 KEXP

Not at all, Cheryl! The fact is that teenagers today have no respect! Certainly not the common decency we had as teenagers not to make any noise after 10 or play basketball next to apartments where people might be sleeping. Why, I myself remember needing to chastise a few of my teenage friends to please be considerate of the neighbors when they were playing a rather spirited game of whist outside on a summer’s evening. The fact is that we, you and I, are members of the last generation of people to have been raised correctly or to have any consideration for others, and it is absolutely our responsibility to explain to the CHILDREN who are RUNNING WILD IN OUR STREETS that some behaviors have consequences. That is basically the most punk-rock thing you can do, because we are the punk-rock generation and will never grow old! Please rank the following on the evolutionary ladder: radio DJs, magazine/ newspaper critics, and bloggers. (Feel free to use other examples—worms, geoducks—to give full perspective.) —Andy Harms, DJ, 107.7 The End, 10 a.m. to 2 p.m., weekdays

All DJs, writers, and bloggers are members of the phylum Chordata, class Mammalia, order Primates, family Hominidae, genus Homo, species Homo sapiens. I can think of no instance of any of these occupations being filled by a member of a different species, let alone a different phylum, so their different ranks on the evolutionary ladder are so minuscule as to be imperceptible.

Now, worms are much more interesting! Even the common earthworm—phylum Annelida, class Clitellata, subclass Oligochaeta, order Haplotaxida, sub-order Lumbricina—diverges into so many different family classifications that it would be impossible for me to give due consideration to their diversity even at the level of genus. Geoducks are also invertebrates, as are the vast majority of living things: phylum Mollusca, class Bivalvia, order Myoida, family Hiatellidae. They are presently worth more per pound on the Asian market than either earthworms or music bloggers. All the examples you mention are members of the kingdom Animalia. I hope this helps. At a concert I tend to get mesmerized by the drummer, but then I wonder: Is being a drummer boring after a while? Just back there pounding away? —Marty Riemer, DJ, 103.7 The Mountain, 2–8 p.m. weekdays

Without getting too pop-Buddhist on you, everything gets boring after a while. Even being a DJ for The Mountain must get boring after a while, even though you get to play Jason Mraz anytime you want! Of all the things in the world that a person has to do night after night to earn a living, I imagine pounding on the drums would have to be one of the most continually interesting and engaging in the whole human enterprise. The drummer is setting the time, which can only mean they are listening to the music of the universe. E John Roderick is the singer and songwriter responsible for Seattle’s The Long Winters. He tweets @johnroderick. jroderick@seattleweekly.com

NAKED & FAMOUS

Radio folk used to be anonymous. Now we’re just creepy. BY RACHEL BELLE

I was minding my own business walking through the Georgetown Carnival last year, when a sassy 1970s jumpsuit gave me the old “Come hither.” It was flammable, it was extremely orange, and it would be mine. Alas, there was no makeshift dressing room, so I did what any self-respecting second-hand-clothes lover would do: I changed in the street. I yanked off my boots, pulled the pants up over my leggings, looked to my left, looked to my right, and then (ehhh, fuck it) snapped off my shirt. I was struggling to slip my arm through the hole when I heard “Rachel Belle! Hey! Rachel Belle!” Two excited listeners waved and squawked my name as I stood topless, a half-zipped, extremely orange jumpsuit hanging listlessly around my waist. Sigh. Anonymity: Isn’t that why we got into radio? So we can strip down to our bras in parking lots without the risk of anyone recognizing us? So we can get drunk and make out in a booth at the Tin Hat? So we can shamelessly stand on a karaoke stage and play air saxophone to Wham!’s “Careless Whisper”? As a radio broadcaster, I’ve enjoyed all these activities, risk-free, for nearly a decade. But between my KIRO-FM Facebook page and my face being prominently displayed on the station’s website, my days of anonymity are over. Unfortunately, I haven’t adjusted my lifestyle accordingly. I started working in news and music radio in 2001, and was surprised to find that the old “You have a face for radio” line was still in vogue, usually followed by a hearty chuckle and a slap on the back. Just as popular was the ever-sosuave and clever pick-up line “But you’re too pretty for radio. You have a face for TV!” (If you’re wondering whether this line worked, note the aforementioned experience at the Tin Hat.) Admittedly, there is something a bit thrilling about getting recognized. A born show pony, I can’t help but feel a little zing of “They like me! They really like me!” when a middle-aged woman asks for my autograph or a construction worker yells “Rachel Belle! I love you, baby!” It’s certainly more fulfilling than fielding the top three questions I’m asked when I tell people I work in radio: 1. Radio?! People still listen to the radio? 2. Oh! Are you a weather girl? 3. Were you that topless girl at the Georgetown Carnival? Dammit. E Rachel Belle hosts the “Ring My Belle” segment on 97.3 KIRO FM. music@seattleweekly.com

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The little device keeping little bands from a big audience. By Chris Kornelis

hen station manager Chris Mays helped launch 103.7 The Mountain in 1991, she began with a simple idea: to mix the city’s affinity for classic rock with its taste for guitar-based blues. She believed her target audience—relatively affluent adults in their late 20s to mid-50s—wanted to hear new music from the likes of Lyle Lovett, along with deep cuts from the Rolling Stones and Led Zeppelin: a formula that in radio is called Triple A, Adult Album Alternative. “It’s a combination of art and science,” says Mays. “It is not an easy format.” For 20 years that combo thrived in Seattle. DJ Shawn Stewart, a fixture at the station for a decade, called the mix “sprout rock”: “sort of organic, farm-fresh, artisanal . . . like farmersmarket music.” The station hit its mark for long enough, and with such distinction, that the marketing slogan “Mountain Music” soon became shorthand for the mostly guitar-based, easy-to-consume sound that it curated. Listeners were also loyal. Stewart says they responded not just to the music, but also to the station’s friendly, snark-free vibe. “They went to our shows, they showed up to meet DJs,” she says. “We definitely felt like we were selling a lifestyle.” Even better, The Mountain’s music soon became something it’d never been: hip. Over the better part of the past decade, the new heavyweights of the Northwest—from Fleet Foxes and the Decemberists to The Head and the Heart and Neko Case—began to hew closer and closer to the “sprout rock” Stewart and her colleagues were already spinning. Suddenly the songs getting significant airplay on The Mountain also happened to be some of the most popular in Seattle.

Mike Freiheit

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The Meter’s Running

of friendly beard-rock was finally becoming ubiquitous? A good part of the answer can be found on the hips of 1,500 local listeners. Whereas once ratings giant Arbitron relied on a diary system to determine how many people were listening to what stations, it now has its hopes pinned on a pager-like device called the Portable People Meter, which some claim is the biggest disruption to radio in decades. Even bigger, they say, than the Internet. The Meter’s results—along with market research—are what convinced The Mountain’s higher-ups that its audience didn’t want nearly as much new music as it was playing. What it wanted instead was something comforting and familiar. So the responded by “The pressure to not make mistakes leads station resolving to play it to less experimentation and risk-taking safe, take fewer risks, on all levels . . . New bands very likely get and not add “new” caught up in that vortex.” music unless it was already a hit. “What does ‘new’ really mean?” asks Mike Kaplan, program But at the end of last year, the station fired director at The Mountain. “What’s new for Stewart and program director Dave Benson, [some people] is something that’s been out and replaced most of the current artists on for a year. We’re going to be very careful and its playlist not named Adele with extra helpselective in [adding new music] here.” ings of the Doobie Brothers and Journey. The They’re hardly the only ones. Since ArbiMountain’s sound, which had become one of the most identifiable in town, was now largely tron introduced the Meter to markets in 2007—it reached Seattle two years later— indistinguishable from the classic rock on programmers around the country have done KZOK and the oldies at KJR. a lot of soul-searching. Stations have been Why would a station fire the people reformatted, risks kept to a minimum, and for responsible for its success just as its brand

many—particularly those that play rock and roll—the number of new songs that make it to the airwaves has been reduced, thus limiting exposure for up-and-coming bands. “The combination of no breakthrough bands—or very few—combined with the pressure to not make mistakes leads to less experimentation and risk-taking on all levels,” says Fred Jacobs, one of the nation’s most prominent rock-radio consultants. “New bands very likely get caught up in that vortex.”

efore the introduction of the Meter, Arbitron simply asked people in markets around the country to keep track of the stations they listened to by filing reports each night in a diary. That’s why DJs had memorable names like the T-Man and Diamond Dave, and why stations incessantly bombarded listeners with their call letters: While it was important that people were listening, it was more important that they remembered what they were listening to, so they could then tell Arbitron. The Meter is different. Instead of relying on a listener’s imperfect memory, it tracks their habits by detecting an inaudible frequency from stations. The Meter then, according to Arbitron, reveals what people are actually listening to, not just what they say they listen to, and in doing so has shown that much of what stations believed about their audiences is wrong.

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feature» The Meter’s Running » fRoM page 6 According to Arbitron’s data, men, for example, listen to light pop hits more often than they claim. But the most significant figure to come out of the new readings, however, is 10, as in minutes. It’s now become accepted wisdom that listeners tune in for only about 10 minutes at a time. That, programmers say, changes everything. “If I know that my family only has 10 minutes, I’m gonna serve a different meal,” says one former program director, who asked not to be named. “[It] changes the way that you approach the whole procedure.” Faced with the prospect of getting only onethird of a sitcom to sell themselves to listeners, stations have now determined that they need to rid their programs of all superfluous material: Chatter is frowned upon, if not eliminated; familiar music is king; and taking a chance on a new song is a serious risk—one that stations across the industry are more cautious about. “I think [the Meter] has had a bit of a chilling effect on all formats,” says Jacobs. Not every station has compensated by upping its quotient of classic rock. In fact, Nielsen—a company that tracks music sales and airplay—released a report last spring showing that many adult-contemporary stations have started to add more current pop hits from artists like Adele in place of oldies like Rod Stewart. Locally, Seattle’s smoothjazz station, KWJZ 98.9, converted to a modern-rock station, Click, at the end of 2010, and now plays classic and new alternative hits. But giving listeners even more chances to hear established artists like Pink, Adele, and Foster the People isn’t creating opportunities for new bands and songs. To program managers like Kaplan, a “new” song is, for example, Gotye’s “Someone I Used to Know”; once he determines it’s popular enough, he’ll play it relentlessly—as often as 55 times a week, or once every two hours, he says. Digital competition from Sirius XM, Pandora, and Spotify has taken some of the sex appeal away from terrestrial radio, and sparked much talk of its impending death. But Arbitron (and Kaplan) will gladly tell anyone who’ll listen that the medium still reaches more than 93 percent of Americans every week. “The majority are still discovering new music on FM radio,” says Jacobs. Record labels and bands know this. And they know that the emphasis on what’s safe is making it harder to get their unfamiliar music heard by a huge audience.

ack in the summer of 2010, Sub Pop Records had radio’s unmatched reach at its disposal after the local indie label hired Scott Perlewitz, a man with a long history of getting music played. At Warner Brothers’ Reprise imprint, Perlewitz had helped get early spins for then-unknowns Michael Bublé, Josh Groban, and My Chemical Romance. Sub Pop hoped he’d help do the same with the label’s newest band, The Head and the Heart. When it hired Perlewitz, Sub Pop was in the process of signing the folk-pop sextet that had independently sold 10,000 copies

of its self-titled debut. It was also gearing up to release the second album by Fleet Foxes, whose first was a surprise hit. Both albums featured some of the most radio-friendly sounds the label—with its roots in punk and grunge—had ever released. They were, in other words, “Mountain Music.” And with Perlewitz’s help, by the time Sub Pop reissued The Head and the Heart’s debut, the record was in heavy rotation. Other stations followed suit, and soon the band’s single “Lost in My Mind” topped the Triple A charts, while the record went on to sell more than 200,000 copies. “The Triple A format . . . was essential in the radio plan,” says Perlewitz. “The fact that radio is able to expose a band like The Head and the Heart to a much larger audience than they could ever do by playing a show or string of shows in a market make it a very important partner in any overall marketing plan.” Thanks to The Mountain’s subsequent changes based on the Meter’s data, however, Perlewitz doesn’t expect the station to provide the same boost when The Head and the Heart release their next record. “Certainly I’ve had more than one discussion about [the Meter] and its effect on new music,” he says. “I think that the lessening of new music on commercial radio is an inadvertent result of [the Meter], not an intention by anyone to assault new music.”

eter data, and the best practices it inspires, are not without critics. A common refrain is that the sample size is too small and doesn’t constitute the full range of listeners. A number of programmers and DJs made the case—on and off the record— that The Mountain’s more affluent listeners would be less likely to wear what looks like a pager on their hip. Jon Miller, Arbitron’s head of programming services, says that while the sample size is smaller than that of the diary system, participants are tracked for longer periods of time, sometimes up to two years, giving a fuller picture of a listener’s habits. He also says the company does its best to make sure its samples are representative of the city’s demographics. “Our goal is to make that sample size look like Seattle,” he says. Jacobs, the rock-radio consultant, believes the Meter isn’t perfect, but is far more accurate than the alternative. He remembers times when stations that had gone off the air for a number of days would still rate well under the diary system—a clear sign that participants were fudging their numbers. But he says that some of the stations that are having the most success dealing with the new reality are going against, not with, the Meter’s mandate. He points to KISW as one example. The rock station lets its host talk at length—anathema to conventional wisdom—and is still one of the city’s most popular, often ranking first or second among listeners above age 6, compared to ratings in the high teens and 20s for The Mountain and The End. Another station that has bucked the Meter trend is Portland’s KINK-FM, where The Mountain’s founding program director, Chris Mays, has turned a struggling dial destination into one of the city’s most popular. Unlike at

the changed Mountain, Mays plays new songs by the likes of Jack White, Alabama Shakes, and the Black Keys alongside “safer” tracks by Tom Petty and the Beatles, and believes a constant stream of fresh music is critical to the format. “If you only play meat and potatoes, it becomes boring and bland,” she says. “If you are blending the music in the way that [listeners] are looking for, then they come back, and you get more 10-minute segments from them throughout the day.” So far, The Mountain’s move hasn’t had a drastic impact on ratings. Its total audience dropped each month from March through May, but Kaplan says the dip will be reversed as soon as people better understand what changes have been made. “When you want to bring new people to the party,” he says, “you gotta let ’em know.”

or many, though, the Meter is merely a distraction from a different problem. Even popular rock stations like KROQ in Los Angeles or KISW rely heavily on hits from the early ’90s. The elephant in the room when it comes to rock radio’s emphasis on old stalwarts like Pearl Jam and Nirvana is that some think the reason new bands are being kept off radio is not that there’s a bias against them, but because they’re simply not good enough. “I think most rock programmers would tell you the quality of new rock they’ve had to work with over the last decade just has not been as good,” Jacobs says. “It has more to do with the fact that programmers just cannot find new

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“Most rock programmers would tell you the quality of new rock they’ve had to work with over the last decade just has not been as good.”

ckornelis@seattlweekly.com

Reve r b • Seattle w ee kly • JUN E J u ly 4−10, 2012

music that works as well as it used to.” The argument holds water when you consider what’s going on in country radio, which is constantly infused with new music from young artists like Blake Shelton and Taylor Swift. RJ Curtis, VP of Radio for Nashville trade magazine Country Aircheck, says the genre’s current crop of young stars is the strongest since the classes of the late ’80s and early ’90s, when Garth Brooks, Clint Black, Brooks & Dunn, and Alan Jackson brought twang to the mainstream. An influx of stars with widespread appeal means there’s less need to dig into older catalogues to keep an audience captive. Even before the Meter was introduced to Seattle, Kaplan—hired by Entercom as program director of alt-rock station The End in 2008—had begun pulling back on new music. “The End was very indie, too über-cool,” he says. “Too much unknown.” So Kaplan moved the station to where it is today: a carefully curated mix of safe new songs backed by huge helpings of bankable hits from the past 20 years. It may not be what new bands looking to break out want to hear, but the format should sound familiar: It’s the one The Mountain employed in 1991. E

reviews»Our Take on Every Local Release*

presents at

DIMITRIOU’S

It’s July 2012, and Seattle Sounds Like . . . 1990. But the band pushes its sound into more modern territory as the album progresses, and the result rises well above pastiche. AG (Sat., July 21, JewelBox/Rendezvous) 2033 6th Avenue (206) 441-9729 j a z z a l l e y. c o m

Bright White Lightning, Bad Teeth (out now, Data Airlines, brightwhitelightning.com): Taking a tip—and blips and bleeps—from reconfigured video-game consoles, electro, and pop, this new band forges a chip-rock sound somewhere between the raunchy Euro dance sounds of Ed Banger Records and the spacy jams of the Ninja Tune label. GWENDOLYN ELLIOTT

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Monterey Jazz Festival County All-Star Big Band and Vocal Ensemble

Brothers From Another, Taco Tuesday (out now, self-released, brothersfromanother. bandcamp.com): Besides repping Seattle as well as anyone (with a song called “Molly Moon” and guest contributions from both Blue Scholars), this youthful hip-hop duo’s latest is polished and poised beyond its years. AG (Sun., July 29, Crocodile)

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LOCAL RELEASES James Apollo, Little War, Little Less (out

now, Marterry, jamesapollo.com): Brooklynto-Seattle transplant Apollo enlisted local folk hero Damien Jurado to produce his latest record, and the influence is apparent in the album’s restrained, dusky baroque pop. ANDREW GOSPE (Fri., July 27, Fremont Abbey) Autumn Electric, Make Me a Tree (out now,

Reve r b • Seat tle weekly • Ju ly 4−1 0, 2012

An Evening with Steve Tyrell

Grammy-Winning Sinatraesque Vocalist. July 12 – 15

self-released, autumnelectric.bandcamp. com): Folksy indie rock with a pop sweet tooth, featuring male and female vocal leads, an occasional surge of electric guitar, and solidly crafted songs. MA’CHELL DUMA LAVASSAR

David Bavas, Make It Rhyme (out now,

Kenny Lattimore

International R&B Singer and Sincere Soul Artist July 17 – 18

Proud Mountain, davidbavas.com): Acoustic Americana that’s at its best when the mandolin and pedal steel have kicked in. Bavas’ songs are solid but his voice is the weak link, and on the sparser arrangements, his singing has trouble carrying the melodies. DAVE LAKE

Daily Benson, Casa Verde (out now, Team

James Cotton “Superharp” Band Grammy-Winning Down and Dirty Blues Harp Player! July 19 – 22

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Dark Time Sunshine releases ANX on July 24.

teenage daughter of singer/songwriter Robb Benson (Dear John Letters) has her old man’s gift for song. Her debut features her soulful and sultry voice—think Fiona Apple or Feist, with darkly introspective songs to match. DL

Big Wheel Stunt Show, Wonderful LIFE (7/20, self-released, thebigwheelstunt show.com): Hitting on a type of vintage bluesrock that’s practically dead by modern standards, everything from the gritty, raw recording to the twangy, booming electric guitar—especially on “Bud’Der”—screams Zeppelin. JOE WILLIAMS (Fri., July 20, Sunset Tavern)

Black Science, An Echo Through the Eyes of Forever (out now, DMI, blacksciencemusic.bandcamp.com): Seventies-flavored psych-rock with more pop sensibility than your average nostalgic Seattle quartet. Studio tricks and Jane’s Addiction/Stereophonics vocal stylings make this album a definite win. TODD HAMM

Blue Light Curtain, Clouds in Our Hair

(out now, self-released, bluelightcurtain. com): Much of this shoegaze group’s album (especially the first few tracks) sounds like it could have been recorded in London circa

*In each issue, we review every release from local bands and labels scheduled for the coming month. We fully expect a few releases to slip through the cracks. So each issue will also include anything we missed in previous issues, or that had been released in the interim. Send releases and reminders to reverbreviews@seattleweekly.com.

HIGHLY RECOMMENDED

Cloud Person, Anchors in the Sun (out now, Druscilla Cloud Records, cloudperson.bandcamp.com): On their first EP, this eclectic folk band mixes Native American flute and tambourine with keyboards and accordion. Whimsical with a slightly psychedelic feel, Cloud Person sings mostly of romance gone wrong. ALLISON THOMASSEAU (Sun., July 15, Comet Tavern)

Dark Time Sunshine, ANX (7/24, Fake

Four, darktimesunshine.com): Onry Ozzborn and Chicago producer Alex Zavala combine their talents to produce a dense sophomore record with plenty of electronic, spacy flourishes but also a whole lot of accessibility. AG (Sat., July 21, Crocodile)

Dead Man, Filthy Blues (out now, self-

released, deadmanseattle.bandcamp.com): This band plays the kind of bluesy garage rock favored by several other guitar/drum duos in this town, namely The Grizzled Mighty and My Goodness, which would make for a great triple bill (with, hopefully, cheap PBR specials). Seattle bookers, are you listening? DL (Fri., July 6, Skylark)

Dull Knife, Dull Knife (out now, Debacle

Records, debaclerecords.bandcamp.com): Two 15-minute-plus tracks of dark ambient noise: digital tooth-grinding and buzz saws, whitenoise wind howl, and spooky, chain-rattling ambience—all strangely relaxing. ERIC GRANDY

Fall of 1920, Collide (out now, self-released,

facebook.com/fallof1920): These 55 minutes of slow crunch show promise, but would be sharper in half the space, and with a good dose of hustle, focus, and Adderall. (Sat., July 14, High Dive) CHRIS KORNELIS

Fated Empire, “Bannermen” (out now,

Fated Empire, fatedempire.bandcamp.com): Released as a promo single for the official launch of new local indie label Fated Empire, this track contains a verse from all four FE players (Graves 33, Sarx, Name the Uncanny, Vice Vs.) over a battlefield-ready tuba loop.

FUN & FREE FREE SWAG FOR THE FIRST 100 VISITORS

SEATTLE'S LARGEST INDIE CRAFT SHOW

U RBAN CR AF T UPRISING 2 0 1 2 SUMM E R S H OW

JULY 7th & 8th from 11am-5pm THE SEATTLE CENTER EXHIBITION HALL

w w w.urbancraf tuprising .com

URBAN C R A FT UPRISING U

rban Craft Uprising is Seattle's largest indie craft show! At UCU, now in its eighth year, fans can choose from a wide variety of hand-crafted goods, including clothing of all types, jewelry, gifts, bags, wallets, buttons, accessories, aprons, children's goods, toys, housewares, paper goods, candles, kits, art, food, and much, much more. Each show is carefully curated and juried to ensure the best mix of crafts & arts, along with quality & originality. This bi-annual show features over 150 vendors excelling in the world of craft, art & design. Over the course of 8 years UCU has garnered so much attention that over 10,000 fans swarm to the show over the course of a weekend. Hundreds of fans are lined up before our doors even open to recieve our famous SWAG bags full of goodies from our vendors & sponsors. Not only can you peruse the aisles full of vendors selling their jewelry, clothing, paper products, toys homemade food & much more, but there are also hourly book signings & crafty demos to check out. This show is free & fun for the whole family! We look forward to seeing you! A NOTE FROM OUR ORGANIZERS

CRAFTY AUTHOR BOOK FREE CRAFT DEMOS SIGNINGS AMY FLURRY, Recipe for Press

DIY Espionage Accessories with SHAWN BOWMAN

How do you craft a pitch that connects! Written by seasoned market editor and featuring insights from major media influencers, Recipe for Press, pitch your story like the pros & create a buzz is a “h ow-to - b e -yo u r- own - p u b licis t ” guide unlike any other.

Criminal Crafts author Shawn Bowman, shows you how to make fashionable and fun DIY espionage accessories and some devious and practical crafts. Perfect for amateur spies, precocious crafters and any mom who’s ever really wanted eyes in the back of her head.

GENE AMBAUM & ASOPHIE GOLDSTEIN, Poopy Claws Poopy Claws is a graphic novel about a cat, Stinky, and the boy who loves him. Stinky isn’t a bad cat, but he won’t use his litter box, despite Father’s best efforts to make it appealing. Mother doesn’t like the cat because she’s a bit of a clean freak. And mom’s overbearing aunt is coming over for dinner.

MOLLY MOON, Molly Moon's Homemade Ice Cream Since Molly Moon Neitzel opened her first ice cream scoop shop, it was an instant hit. Now you can make her delicious treats at home! Her recipies focus on using local & fresh ingredients these ice creams and sorbets are simple and fun to make.

SHAWN BOWMAN, Criminal Crafts Have all of the tricks of a criminal without the downfalls of the trade? Criminal Crafts brings together illicit behavior and artistic expression with dark humor in this do-it-yourself book. Criminal Crafts focuses on original crafts and recipes themed in noir, murder, retro espionage, pulp fiction, mafia, and voodoo.

KRISTEN RASK

LINDSEY ROSS

“UCU could not be what it is today without the loyalty of our fans! We strive to make each show unique & continue to raise the bar of each show. And of course, this wouldn't be accomplished without all of our lovely & talented vendors. We hope to see you all at this summer's show!”

SATURDAY Demo: Cameo. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 12pm-1pm Signing: Shawn Bowman . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 12pm-1pm Demo: Craftwich . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 1pm-2pm Signing: Molly Neitzel . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 1pm-2pm Demo: Shawn Bowman . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 2pm-3pm Signing: Jessi Bloom . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 2pm-3pm Demo: Pepperjack Homes . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 3pm-4pm Signing: Amy Flurry . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 3pm-4pm

JESSI BLOOM Free-Range Chicken Gardens For anyone who wants a fabulous garden where colorful chickens happily roam, Free-Range Chicken Gardens is the guide that will bring the dream home to roost.

SUNDAY Demo: Shawn Bowman . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 12pm-1pm Signing: Amy Flurry . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 12pm-1pm Demo: Pepperjack Homes . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 1pm-2pm Signing: Gene Ambaum . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 1pm-2pm Demo: SimpleKraft . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 2pm-3pm Signing: Shawn Bowman . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 2pm-3pm Demo: Cameo . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 3pm-4pm

Needle Felting Basics with MADE BY MOXIE Needle felting is fun and addictive! Learn to make and embellish 3D wool objects using fiber and felting needles.

Needle Felted Embellishing with MADE BY MOXIE Create your own tapestries, bring life to an old sweater, or poke some extra cuteness on those thrift-store baby socks. Supplies will be provided but feel free to bring your own fabric to play with.

Sewing Crash Course with URBAN CRAFT CENTER The Urban Craft Center will be hosting a short Sewing Crash Course. There will be some sewing tables, ironing boards and tools to work with. Students will walk away with a completed project and better understanding of the sewing machine.

Learn the Basics of Crochet with CRAFTWICH CREATIONS Dawn Carter loves to teach and share her knowledge with anyone who’s willing to learn. She loves to crochet blankets, afghans and things that can be stuffed… Amigurumi! She is the founder of Eastside Hookers & Co. and member of Craftwich Creations.

Enviro-Friendly Lifestyle Starter Kits with PEPPERJACK HOME Come check out an eco-friendly demo by Robyn & Tyler of Pepperjack Home. Find out all about their awesome st ylish and environmentally friendly handmade goods! They promise there's something for everybody, lots of good information & amazing new eco-friendly starter kits.

Screen Printing with SIMPLEKRAFT Join us for a demonstration of the hobby screen-printing. The Simplekraft Kit provides all the items needed to start screen-printing, including a hand stretched, photo sensitized frame. In this class we will go through the screen-printing process from start to finish and print on various items.

T-shirt Recon with CAMEO Throw caution to the wind and just cut. From there you will do a couple no-sew reconstructions that you can take home with you! Please bring old shirts from home so you can turn that old shirt into something new.

TO LEARN MORE VISIT US AT WWW.URBANCRAFTUPRISING.COM

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flying bird botanicals Bread and Badger LLC Spincycle Yarns Devout/Kristine Ann's Blue Diamond Stamp Co. Unusual Cards Pepperjack Home Im Strang Sparrow and Sundry Bella Sisters rebe Alchemy Goods Alchemy Goods Ana Apple Le Petit Elefant Smitten: Artisan Truffles Sweet Coconut Bakery soraam Irene Aiko Pink Tank Ltd. Tripper Dungan Hasenpfeffer Incorporated Sown Designs texture clothing This Charming Candy Vivi Dot Dottyspeck plumbop Amy Bengtson Jewelry The Urban Craft Center The Urban Craft Center betsy & iya xobruno Bevobirdie Originals Hot Cakes Fable and Fury Mates + Rubbish Slide Sideways Carnivorous Terrariums tiny sparks design Muluk Monkey Sock Monkey Peace and the Poet MailChimp/Cupcake Royale Raffle Table Demo Area Ykchaua Chocolates, LLC Foamy Wader Chinook Book Seattle Weekly Coffee Purse Idle Hands Designs Umba Box Attic Journals Machete Wonderlust Jewelry Sweet Anthem Handmade Perfumes

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reviews»

Golden Gardens, “Transparent Things” (out now, self-released, soundcloud.com/ wearegoldengardens): Vocalist Aubrey Rachel Violet Bramble fits her airy vocal notes into the nooks and crannies of the watercolor synth streaks and wavering guitar chords that multi-instrumentalist Gregg Alexander Joseph Neville has beautifully layered. Fitting for either a windows-down summer drive or a rainy-day stroll. TH (Mon., July 16, Crocodile)

Rachel Harrington, Makin’ Our House a Honkytonk (out now, Skinnydennis Records, rachelharrington.net): Seattle has no shortage of lady country crooners: Ballard Avenue is littered with half-assed Emmylou wannabes, but Rachel Harrington ain’t one of ’em. Hailed by Q magazine as having a voice that “makes Neko Case sound like Olivia Newton-John,” Harrington is both fresh and referential, with a songwriting style very reminiscent of the premier honky-tonk honeys of yesterday, namely Loretta and Dolly. Her stellar track “Wedding Ring Vacation” will certainly rank as one of the year’s best among the “swingin’ doors” set. MDL Carson Henley, 100 Hours (out now, self-

released, soundcloud.com/hey-listentothismusic): Self-labeled as “funkadelic rock,”

Henley’s second album is reminiscent of 1960s R&B and soul but stays modern with piano accents and jazzy guitar riffs. You’ll want to get up and groove. AT (Sat., July 7, Columbia City Theater)

(out now, self-released, hillsofelysium.com): Wearing tons of eyeliner and dressing like Marilyn Manson’s stepchildren makes it easy to dismiss how smart and political you really are. But if you give Hills of Elysium a listen, you’ll find there’s no ignoring lead singer September Garland, whose potent, screaming vocals will either make you want to headbang your heart out or shoot yourself in it—and are perfect for the molten, gothic new metal they make. MDL

The Intelligence, Everybody’s Got It Easy but Me (out now, In the Red Records, intheredrecords.com): Lars Finberg and crew pump out nervy, poppy garage rock with such industrious regularity that it would almost feel like a mechanical exercise if it weren’t so lively. EG (Thurs., July 19, Crocodile)

Joy Wants Eternity, The Fog Is Rising

(out now, self-released, joywants eternity.com): The third album from this Seattle post-rock band is ambient and gorgeous, as walls of guitar give way to syncopated grooves and gently picked guitar lines. As with many bands of this genre, the

THE BLAKES Art of Losses

(7/24, PledgeMusic, theblakesband.com)

Hills of Elysium, This Lost Generation

DAVID BELISLE

Graves’ verse is decent but choppy, and Sarx emerges as the most confident lyricist of the bunch. TH (Fri., July 27, High Dive)

The third LP from this Seattle trio was produced by the band in the mountains of Maine, yielding a dozen literate, dreamy indie-pop songs, perfect for lazing away a day in the Seattle sun. The Blakes have an affinity for all kinds of rock and roll, and don’t mind wearing their influences on their collective sleeve. You can almost run down the stuff they love by going through the album track by track, making out distinct nods to The Jam (“Black Carnation”), ’80s Stones (“Sea Fishing”), New Wave (“Dark Is the Night”) and the Strokes (“Paralysis”). But the album never feels wholly derivative, thanks to the band’s own aesthetic, which blends all the above into a series of cheery melodies, blankets of reverb, and waves of nostalgia. DAVE LAKE

songs are vocal-free, but this is abstract art with no room for representational lyrics to muddy it up. DL (Fri., July 6, Sunset Tavern) Klyntel, “Love Is Here to Stay” (out now, self-released, klyntel.com): ’90s R&B in the tradition of Blackstreet and Motel Jordan that would have fit snugly onto the Space Jams soundtrack. CK (Sun., July 29, Alki Arts Festival)

Landlord’s Daughter, The Passengers

(out now, self-released, facebook.com/ lldaughter): Emo almost to the point of being overwrought, this folksy dad-rock fusion is earnest in both delivery and musical ambitions. The Passengers takes itself very seriously; with a bit of self-editing and a little humor, it could be made more enjoyable. MDL

» CONTINUED ON PAGE 12

Reve r b • Seattle w ee kly • JUN E J u ly 4−10, 2012

reviews» Join us in the Trophy Room for Happy Hour: Thursday Bartender Special 8-Close Fridays: 5-8pm

dinner & show

RESERVE THE TROPHY ROOM FOR YOUR NEXT EVENT!

FRI/JULY 6 & SAT/JULY 7 • 7:30PM & 10:30PM DELOURUE PRESENTS:

freedom fantasia codeine

w/ scout niblett (7/9) rivulets (7/10) THU/JULY 12 • 8PM

tish hinojosa w/

stephanie schneiderman

FRI/JULY 13 & SAT/JULY 14 • 7PM & 9:30PM

Reve r b • Seat tle weekly • Ju ly 4−1 0, 2012

irma thomas

next • 7/18 songs of the naked soul featuring lindsey pavao from the voice • 7/19 geoffrey castle • 7/20 school of rock - dark side of the moon • 7/21 michael kaeshammer • 7/22 the bobs “30 years to life” • 7/23 owl city w/ jayme dee - sold out! • 7/25 j. wong’s singer songwriter showcase • 7/26 paul thorn w/ grant peeples • 7/28 & 7/29 ottmar liebert & luna negra • 7/30 sarah jarosz • 8/1 & 8/2 maceo parker • 8/3 & 8/4 the kinsey sicks - electile dysfunction • 8/5 kasey chambers • 8/7 hapa • 8/8 - 8/10 burlesco divino: wine in rome • 8/13 sara gazarek • 8/14 & 8/15 sierra leone refugee all stars • 8/16 rory block • 8/17 eric johnson at the neptune • 8/17 coco montoya

• 7/5 cazuela de condor (chile) • 7/6 danny godinez / scrumptious and the backbeat • 7/7 tba • 7/8 wes weddell band • 7/9 free funk union featuring rotating hosts: d’vonne lewis and adam kessler • 7/10 singer-songwriter showcase • 7/11 joe cano / gems featuring daniel rapport TO ENSURE THE BEST EXPERIENCE

PLEASE ARRIVE EARLY DOORS OPEN 1.5 HOURS PRIOR TO FIRST SHOW ALL-AGES (BEFORE 9:30PM)

thetripledoor.net 216 UNION STREET, SEATTLE 206.838.4333

Lost Dogma, The Ghost You Left Behind

(7/20, Knick Knack Records, lostdogma.com): At its core, Lost Dogma’s sophomore release is a country-flavored rock record rich with three-part harmonies and tuneful choruses, but the band wanders across a broader rock spectrum, keeping things interesting as they show the influence of Bob Seger (“Sunny Divide”), The Band (“Yellow Brick Road”), and the Grateful Dead (“Never Fight the Devil”). DL (Fri., July 20, Tractor Tavern)

Lozen, Para Vida (7/20, Silent Queef Records,

COCKTAILS • TASTY HOT DOGS • LOTSA PINBALL

2222 2ND AVENUE • SEATTLE

MON/JULY 9 & TUE/JULY 10 • 8PM

» FROM PAGE 11

206-441-5449

lozenpower.bandcamp.com): Named for a female Apache warrior, this Tacoma female duo plays angular, arty metal, sometimes en español. It’s not all raging, though. The best moments happen when the ladies lay back a bit to harmonize and get all Breeders-like, like on “Le Dragon.” DL

Magnetic Circus, Elementary Particles (out now, self-released, magneticcircus.bandcamp. com): Well-executed electro-psychedelia meets elements of metal, gothy mope-rock and sci-fi nerddom for interesting tracks with names like “Release the Kraken” and “Deep Space Meat.” MDL (Thurs., July 19, Blue Moon Tavern) Vicci Martinez, Vicci (out now, Universal

Republic, viccimartinez.com): The Tacoma songstress’ first album since coming to national attention as a finalist on NBC’s The Voice contains predictably poppier tracks that don’t do justice to her natural raw soulfulness, but Martinez’s powerhouse vocals still manage to shine through. “Come Along,” her duet with Cee Lo Green, is a fun listen. ERIN K. THOMPSON (Wed., July 4, Gas Works Park) Ken McAllister, Ken McAllister (out now, self-released, kenrmcallister.tumblr.com): Rooted in folk and inner reflection, this album is basically a slow-moving, 40-minute ballad of soft guitar-plucking. But what it lacks in variation is easily made up for by its raw recording and performance. JW

OCnotes, Moldavite (out now, self-

released, ocnotes.bandcamp.com): This 33-song epic from one of the great Seattle talents features neck-snapping beats, intricately layered drums, mind-warping studio effects, and expertly spliced snippets of sound. A nonstop barrage of rhythm and rolling samples, Moldavite is Notes at his self-contained best, and it doesn’t get any better than that. TH (Tues., July 17, Barboza)

Orca Team, Restraint (out now, self-released, facebook.com/orcateam): This record stays true to its name—there’s nothing heavy or overblown about the easy, bouncy surf-pop melodies, a clean aesthetic that works nicely with frontman Leif Anders’ smoothly lacquered vocals. EKT (Thurs., Aug. 2, Funhouse)

Posse, Some Dongs (out now, selfreleased, posseposse.bandcamp.com): Each of the three members of this local garage-rock band individually covered a Bill Callahan song; each cover sounds so pleasant

VARIOUS ARTISTS Head East (out now, Old Redmond Fire House, redmond.gov/medialab) The Old Fire House Teen Center in Redmond has a long history of nurturing up-and-coming Eastside acts, from Modest Mouse (from Issaquah) to the Blood Brothers (Kirkland/Redmond). If no longer the destination for touring bands that it was during Seattle’s odious Teen Dance Ordinance days, it remains a vital incubator for suburb-bred talent destined for Seattle and the wider world. This comp, recorded in the OFH’s media lab, ranges from sax jazz and slap-bass funk/rock to the usual indie and several entries of acoustic folk. Borough’s slowbuilding post-rock instrumental “Mayan Tomb” is a highlight, as is Zephyrs’ scrappy and catchy indie-rock tune “Cairo Kids,” an ode to the Seattle arts space that does for Capitol Hill kids what the OFH historically has for the 425—proving that the faintly longing symbiosis of suburb and city still applies. ERIC GRANDY

and lovingly executed, it’s impossible to pick a favorite. EKT (Fri., July 13, Tractor Tavern)

Prestige, Restrain From It All (7/16,

self-released, prestigenw.com): Operating at two speeds, “freight train” and “face melt,” Restrain From It All is an incredibly fierce and potent album for fans of nonstop, uncompromising metal. “1134,” the standout track, features stop-and-go instrumentation and ruthless breakdowns. JW (Mon., July 16, El Corazon)

Producer Snafu, Songs of Sorrow (out now, Automation Records, automationrecords. bandcamp.com): Sixteen relatively homogeneous tracks of classical piano and breakbeats, a combination that works nearly as often as it sounds completely incongruous. AG Riypnt, “Blast Off” (out now, self-released, ripynt.bandcamp.com): A bonus track from the Everett MC’s The Hurt Locker Deluxe edition, “Blast Off” features a pulse-revving MTK beat, but shows again that while Ripynt is a decent

lyricist, his songs sag when they dwell on clichéd rap subject matter (“I’ma blast off!”, etc.). TH Seapony, “What You Wanted” (out now, Hardly Art, hardlyart.com/Seapony): The first single from the sweet pop trio’s forthcoming second LP thrums and buzzes with a happy energy before it starts wandering into monotone territory. EKT (Thurs., July 19, Olympic Sculpture Park)

Secret Colors, Higher Views (out now, Bridgetown Records, bridgetownrecords.info): Five songs; 35 minutes of meandering, layered guitar and synth reveries; long loops fading over each other; notes dripping off in loose clustered patterns more than in concrete melodies. EG Sic Ill, Techdemic (out now, self-released,

sicill.bandcamp.com): The poor mixing, overly simple keyboard beats, and goofy rhyme style combine for a forgettable EP by this Tacoma rapper/beatmaker. TH

Aaron J. Shay, None the Worse for Wear (out now, self-released, aaronjshay.net): On opening track “The Things We’ll Never Do,” the ukelele-toting singer/songwriter spits out a lovelorn tune with the same bitter snarl as the Mountain Goats’ John Darnielle, but Shay’s pipes soften the impression with sweet backup harmonies and his jaunty uke. GE (Thurs., July 12, Fremont Abbey) Song Sparrow Research, Song Sparrow Research (7/26, self-released, songsparrow research.com): Loose, dreamy pop and lush, sweeping melodies mark this local five-piece’s debut release, recalling the delicate arrangements of Beirut and Travis and, sometimes, the driving indie anthems of the Strokes. GE (Thurs., July 26, Columbia City Theater) Swearengens, Devil Gets Her Way (out now,

The Tempers, Together We Are the Love

Vortex (7/6, self-released, thetempers.net/ music): The Tempers, three siblings, play pleasantly hooky dance-rock with a clear New Wave influence. But none of that really matters, because Corina Bakker’s overemotive, campy vocals overshadow everything else on this EP, for better or (more often) worse. AG (Fri., July 6, Comet Tavern)

The Torn ACLs, Real Risks (7/21, selfreleased, thetornacls.bandcamp.com): The ACLs expand from the relatively bland indie pop of January’s Make a Break, Make a Move on this EP, which features tighter songwriting and more sonic variety. None of it is particularly risky, but it’s a promising step forward. AG (Thurs., July 5, Tractor Tavern) 26000 Volts, Anger Issues (7/20, selfreleased, myspace.com/26000volts): If punk is dead, nobody told these guys. Combining

» CONTINUED ON PAGE 14

Reve r b • Seattle w ee kly • JUN E J u ly 4−10, 2012

self-released, swearengens.com): Honkytonkin’ twang, gritty guitar work, and twostepping tunes keep Seattle’s rich alt-country tradition alive, in the mold of Davidson Hart Kingsbery and Ryan Purcell. GE (Sat., July 14, Slim’s Last Chance)

reviews» » FROM PAGE 13 the best of angry sing-talking, bar chords, and pounding snare, Anger Issues rockets through 22 tracks with enough grit and cojones to power a small car. JW (Fri., July 20, Funhouse) Unnatural Helpers, “Hate Your Teachers”

Debo Band, Debo Band (7/10, Sub Pop,

deboband.com): The Ethiopian diaspora picks up some klezmer-punk kids via Boston’s Jamaica Plain, makes beautiful grooves together—richly rooted but full of contemporary energy. EG (Mon., Sept. 3, Bumbershoot)

SHAWN BRACKBILL

(out now, Hardly Art, hardlyart.com): You know how in Superman II the council banishes General Zod, Non, and Ursa, sentencing them to spend eternity floating around the universe trapped in that clear, shiny pane of glass? That’s a lot like what an Unnatural Helpers record feels like: It’s raw, brutal, and vicious, but contained in sharply produced tracks that have a sheen but aren’t too slick. “Hate Your Teachers,” the first single from the Seattle band’s September LP, Land Grab, is UH mastermind Dean Whitmore’s rowdiest, angriest cut yet. If an intergalactic atomic shock shatters his translucent prison, the president had better be ready to bow down. CK (Sat., Sept. 1, Bumbershoot)

mod soul, with appealingly roughed-up guitars, sweet female backing vocals, and low-falutin’ smart-ass lyrics. Their best stuff since their 2009 debut. EG

Variable, Medic (out now, self-released, variable-mass.bandcamp.com): It would be unfair to call this producer’s four-song EP abstract (and considering how prominently the drums sit in the mix, it would also be untrue), but these instrumental electronic compositions do tend to prioritize texture and beats over melody. AG Within Providence, Within Providence

(out now, self-released, withinprovidence. bandcamp.com): Gregg Neville’s solo project sounds like the gothic cousin of Duran Duran. His debut EP puts out a pop-synth sound with a dark edge. SARAH ELSON

Reve r b • Seat tle weekly • Ju ly 4−1 0, 2012

The Young Evils, Foreign Spells (7/10, out

now, theyoungevils.com): The follow-up to the pop outfit’s 2010 Enchanted Chapel and their first release since expanding from a duo to a quintet, this EP boasts a sharper, darker sound, more vocal variety than the unison voices they’d become known for, and a touch of edgier attitude, most evident on “Devil’s Barricade.” EKT (Fri., July 13, Barboza)

LOCAL LABELS’ OUT-OF-TOWN BANDS Capital Lights, Rhythm ’n’ Moves (7/17,

Tooth & Nail, myspace.com/capitallights): Rewinding the airwaves to 2006, Capital Lights play a nostalgic brand of pop-rock that’s reminiscent of Hellogoodbye meets We the Kings. Sometimes electronic, always upbeat, the foursome even features a brief country twang on the title track. JW

Chain and the Gang, In Cool Blood (out now, K Records, krecs.com/artists/ chain-and-the-gang): Ian Svenonius and the Gang’s latest collection of howling garage and

Sub Pop will release Debo Band’s self-titled LP on July 10.

Deep Time, Deep Time (7/10, Hardly

Art, hardlyart.com/deeptime): This Austin boy/girl duo plays organ and drums, but that’s too small to describe their coolheaded yet fractured pop sound, led by Jennifer Moore’s rich, seriously enthralling vocal jumps. EG (Sat., July 14, Cairo)

Husky, Forever So (7/10, Sub Pop, husky-

songs.com): A Sub Pop–signed Australian quartet making soft, classicist folk rock in the style of Crosby, Stills, Nash and ZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. Aren’t we done with this stuff yet? EG (Fri., July 20, Crocodile)

States, Room to Run (out now, Tooth & Nail,

statesmusic.com): As fresh as Sum 41 and as memorable as Ja Rule, the re-release of Room to Run is crawling and repetitive. Peel away the Paramore-esque vocals and distorted guitar, and you’re left with nothing more than semi-catchy, mildly danceable choruses. JW

Various artists, Country Funk (7/24, Light in the Attic, lightintheattic.net): In the world of musical genre hybrids, “country funk” seems almost an oxymoron, but leave it to those geniuses of the eclectic, our own LITA Records, to compile the best songs this unusual roots-music meld has to offer. Dale Hawkins, Gray Fox, and Mac Davis are just some of the names you’ll find on this truly feel-good collection that features lots of twangy Telecaster goodness and booty-shakin’ bass lines. MDL

Wolves at the Gate, Captors (out now,

Solid State, wolvesatthegate.com): With throat-bursting screams and powerful, throbbing instrumentation, Wolves at the Gate flexes its best hardcore muscles on Captors. It’s clear producer Andreas Magnusson (Oh, Sleeper) had a heavy hand in the final sound, as the record grinds between unyielding and beautiful. JW E

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Dirty Projectors MONDAY, JULY 23

In the last few months, DP has released two new songs, “Gun Has No Trigger” and “Dance for You.” Both feature crisp beats and stirring vocal melodies, and both will appear on the band’s upcoming sixth studio album, Swing Lo Magellan. With Wye Oak.

Showbox at the Market, 1426 First Ave., 6283151. 8 p.m. $22.50 adv./$28 DOS. All ages.

The xx WEDNESDAY, JULY 25

This slick British pop-rock trio has been the cool kids’ favorite band since the popular success of their Mercury Prize-winning self-titled 2009 debut. Tonight’s show, already sold out, comes in advance of the band’s hotly anticipated second LP, Coexist, due in September. With Jacques

Greene. Showbox at the Market, 1426 First Ave., 628-3151. 7 p.m. Sold out. All ages.

Magic Trick The Fresh & Onlys’ Tim Cohen is touring in support of Ruler of the Night, the latest album from his atmospheric pop side project Magic Trick. His Hardly Art labelmate La Sera opens tonight’s show. With Foxygen. Barboza, 925 E. Pike St., 709-9467. 7 p.m. $10.

Dum Dum Girls

his dad Steve’s presence; his latest release, Nothing’s Gonna Change the Way You Feel About Me Now, even contains a doleful track—“Am I That Lonely Tonight?”—about hearing his father on the radio. With Tristen. Showbox at the

Market, 1426 First Ave., 628-3151. 8 p.m. $20 adv./$23 DOS.

Chatham County Line WEDNESDAY, JULY 11

With traditional bluegrass instrumentation, soaring harmonies, and exceptional songwriting, this suit-and-tie-sporting North Carolina quartet— half of whom used to back up Tift Merritt—tour through Seattle in support of their sixth album, Sight and Sound. Tractor Tavern, 5213 Ballard Ave. N.W., 789-3599. 9 p.m. $12.

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Seattle Men of Steel FRIDAY, JULY 20

If you think all music sounds better washed in the wall of reverb and twang produced by a pedal or lap steel guitar, be prepared to get drenched at this bill of some of Seattle’s finest players, including Zoe Muth’s “Country” Dave Harmonson, Orville Johnson, Bob Knetzger, and Dan Tyack. Columbia City Theater, 4916

Rainier Ave. S., 722-3009. 9 p.m. $10.

Celebrate your Independence with Dry Fly

Ronnie Dunn SATURDAY, JULY 28

In 2011, Dunn (of “Boot Scootin’ Boogie” popcountry duo Brooks and Dunn) went solo and released his self-titled debut; hit single “Bleed Red” peaked at #10 on the Billboard country charts. Emerald Queen Casino, 2024 E.

29th St., Tacoma, 253-594-7777. 8:30 p.m. $45–$105.

SATURDAY, JULY 28

If you missed them at Sasquatch!, catch Sub Pop’s sexiest girl band (along with local blissrock quartet Craft Spells) playing tonight’s Little Big Show; 100 percent of the profits will benefit the National Film Festival for Talented Youth.

The Neptune, 1303 N.E. 45th St., 877-7844849. 9 p.m. $15. All ages.

the heavies BY DAVE LAKE

This Is Hell FRIDAY, JULY 6

country BY GWENDOLYN ELLIOTT

Justin Townes Earle FRIDAY, JULY 6

Try as he might, the younger Earle can’t escape

This Long Island hardcore band adds a healthy dose of thrash to their sound, making their latest LP Black Mass a face-pummeling crossover good time. The riffs are gnarly, the tempos are blistering, and the live show is equally potent. With The Greenery, Xerxes.

Vera Project, 305 Harrison St., 956-8372. 7 p.m. $8. All ages.

» CONTINUED ON PAGE 18

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Reve r b • Seattle w ee kly • JUN E J u ly 4−10, 2012

FRIDAY, JULY 27

JASON FRANK ROTHENBERG

Dirty Projectors play the Showbox on July 23.

Life is not always a straight line. Take a turn on our Diavel Demo.

themonthahead» » FROM PAGE 17 The Gaslight Anthem SUNDAY, JULY 8

HAPPY HOUR 7 DAYS A WEEK!

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Bainbridge Bluegrass Festival, Saturday, July 28 at historic Battle Point Park. Saturday, July 28th • 11:00AM – 7:00PM • Battle Point Park 11299 Arrow Point Drive NE • Bainbridge Island Featuring The Clumsy Lovers, Abby Mae and the Homeschool Boys, The Oly Mountain Boys, and Side Saddle Free shuttle service between the Bainbridge Ferry and the festival. Visit www.bainbridgebluegrass.com for more information.

Reve r b • Seat tle weekly • Ju ly 4−1 0, 2012

Special thanks to Bremerton Bottling Company, Inc.

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Agalloch THURSDAY, JULY 12

This Portland metal band can be post-rock one minute and blistering black metal the next, and with songs that frequently push past the 10-minute mark, they can be lots of other things in a single song as well. Few metal bands are as versatile or exciting. With Taurus, Eight Bells.

The Crocodile, 2200 Second Ave., 4414618. 8 p.m. $12. All ages.

SATURDAY, JULY 28

Talk about a stereotypical rap show: There’s somewhere in the ballpark of 20 names on the (comically animated) concert flyer. Don’t fret, though—a few of them (Smoke DZA, Joey Bada$$) should provide an enjoyable soundtrack while you wait . . . and wait to get capital-C Crunk with Three 6 Mafia’s Juicy J.

Neumos, 925 E. Pike St., 709-9442. 8 p.m. $18. All ages.

dj/electronic BY ERIC GRANDY

Donato Dozzy

MONDAY, JULY 23

FRIDAY, JULY 13

Quick, how many bands can you name from Laramie, Wyoming? If you could only come up with one, chances are it’d be these guys—tonight focusing on the short, catchy, Ramones-inspired punk-rock songs from their fifth album, Freak Out! With the Dopamines, Elway, Right Your

This Italian electronic artist appears in two guises tonight: DJing his own deep-house and techno tunes, and performing live with even deeper ambient-house duo Voices From the Lake. With Cyanwave. Re-bar, 1114 Howell

Wrongs, Kids on Fire. El Corazon, 109 Eastlake Ave. E., 381-3094. 7 p.m. $10 adv./$12 DOS. All ages.

St., 233-9873. 10 p.m. $15 adv./$20 DOS.

hip-hop BY TODD HAMM

Talib Kweli TUESDAY, JULY 17

On “Distractions,” the first single from Kweli’s forthcoming album Prisoner of Conscious, the famed Brooklyn lyricist relies less on his trademark personal sentimentality and more on the bottom-up sociopolitical criticism of the moment. With J. Pinder, Raz, DJ Vega the Virgo.

Meek Mill WEDNESDAY, JULY 18

This Philadelphia MC and Rick Ross protégé has some larger-than-life club-bangers to his name, and his loudmouth verses have proven to be just the kind of fuel that gets a place jumping. Show-

box SoDo, 1700 First Ave. S., 652-0444. 7 p.m. $34.50 adv./$40 DOS. All ages.

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The Crocodile, 2200 Second Ave., 4414618. 8 p.m. $25. All ages.

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David, Parker and Lace Cadence. Neumos, 925 E. Pike St., 709-9442. 8 p.m. Free.

Members Only Third Anniversary THURSDAY, JULY 19

Previously held on the roof of HG Lodge as a prime unofficial Capitol Hill Block Party get-down, the local party consortium-turnedrecord label is moving their birthday party indoors this year, with festivities that feature flagship group State of the Artist as well as crowd favorite Hi-Life Soundsystem, a rare

COURTESY OF TEARIST

’ r s e h c a e l B

If Springsteen were a punk, he’d sound like Brian Fallon, leader of The Gaslight Anthem, which may explain why the Boss has joined the band onstage and asked them to open for him. Tonight’s intimate show will precede the band’s fourth LP, Handwritten, but don’t plan on Springsteen showing. With Dave Hause. The Crocodile, 2200

Nite Owls (Barfly, El Mizell, and Mr. Hill) reunion, and master selectors dj100proof and DJ Swervewon. With Shaprece, Thaddeus

Tearist

Tearist FRIDAY, JULY 13

Live performance is so central to this L.A. gothindustrial duo that their debut album, Living: 2009–Present, was a collection of live show recordings. Tonight they bring their pulsing scrape-and-wail to Second Sight. With DJs Rxch Wxtch, Ozma Octavia, Sh6rl6s6, Bryce Brown. Electric Tea Garden, 1402 E. Pike St., 568-3972. 10 p.m. $10.

Photosynthesis 5 FRIDAY, JULY 20–MONDAY, JULY 23

A three-day outdoor electronic music and art festival in remote, scenic Neah Bay will naturally lean to the hippie side of things (workshops include Incense Making, Beginning Kundalini, and Intro to Kabbalah/Shamanic Practice), but amid the psy-trance expect headliner [a]ppendics.shuffle to deliver some plenty serious house and techno. Hobuck Beach Resort, 2726

Makah Passage, Neah Bay, photo synthesisfestival.com. $80–$105. E music@seattleweekly.com

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Treehouse Café

IF ANY LIQUID has epitomized Seattle in 2012, it’s champagne. It goes down smoothly and goes straight

to your head, but there’s often hell to pay the morning after. For one issue per year, however, we give you no hangover—only euphoria. That issue: Seattle Weekly’s annual Best of Seattle™ edition, where readers are given the opportunity to celebrate some of the best people, places, food, music, technology, art, nightlife, and drink that the city offers. That opportunity exists on the ballot below. Given the convenience of modern technology, it’ll likely be easier on us all if you vote online at seattleweekly.com/bestofpoll. But if you’re committed to supporting the Postal Service at a time when it’s being threatened with substantial downsizing, be sure to declare your personal winner in at least five of the categories on this page, detach it from the rest of the issue, and mail it to: Best of Seattle 2011, c/o Seattle Weekly, 1008 Western Ave., Suite 300, Seattle, WA 98104. We’ll need your name, e-mail address (which will be purged upon tallying), and ZIP code to ensure authenticity, and ask that you only vote once. Ballots must be postmarked or submitted online by Thursday, July 19. The winners will be announced in our August 1 issue, and feted that evening at a public bash with food, performance art, and music galore on Pier 66. Tickets can be purchased at seattleweekly.com/bestofparty.

PEOPLE & PLACES

FOOD & DRINK

GOODS & SERVICES

Best Local Politician

Best Bakery

Best Bike Shop

Best Neighborhood

Best Barbecue

Best Bookstore

Best Suburb

Best Breakfast

Best Cannabis Dispensary

Best Park

Best Brewery

Best Mall

Best Mariner

Best Burger

Best Pet Store

Best Online Journalist/Blogger

Best Seahawk

Best Chinese Restaurant

Best Record Store

Best Arts or Music Website

Best Sounder

Best Coffeehouse

Best Place to Buy Sex Toys

Best Nonprofit Website

Best Member of the Seattle Storm

Best Cupcakes

Best Thrift Store

Best Small-Business Website

Best Sports Broadcast Personality

Best Diner

Best Website Graphics

Best Bowling Alley

Best Doughnuts

Best Mobile App

Best Hotel

Best Farmers Market

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V O T E O N L I N E AT S E AT T L E W E E K LY. C O M / B E S T O F P O L L

arts»Performance Stage OPENINGS & EVENTS

ATTACK OF THE KILLER MURDER! OF DEATH!

Wayne Rawley’s murder mystery is set on a 1950s B-movie set. Seattle Public Theater at the Bathhouse, 7312 W. Green Lake Ave. N., 524-1300, seattlepublic theater.org. Donation. Opens July 6. 7 p.m. Fri.–Sat., 2 p.m. Sun.; also 2 p.m. Sat., July 14. Ends July 14. CHAPS! Brits are forced to impersonate singing cowboys for a BBC broadcast in this 1944-set musical. Taproot Theatre, 204 N. 85th St., 781-9707, taproottheatre.org. $15–$37. Previews July 11–12, opens July 13. 7:30 p.m. Wed.–Thurs., 8 p.m. Fri., 2 & 8 p.m. Sat. Ends August 11. FREAK PLAYGROUND Five women, each with a secret, devolve into childhood in Keiko Green’s dark comedy. The Ballard Underground, 2220 N.W. Market St. $5. 7 & 9 p.m. Fri., July 6–Sat., July 7. GREAT SOUL OF RUSSIA

Comic scenes by Pushkin, Chekhov, and others. ACT Theatre, 700 Union St., 292-7676, acttheatre.org. $10. 7 p.m. Tues., July 10.

•

INTIMAN SUMMER THEATER FESTIVAL Four

shows in repertory, July 5– Aug. 26: Romeo and Juliet, Hedda Gabler, Dan Savage’s SEATTLE WEEKLY Miracle!, set in the 1990s’ IPHONE/ANDROID APP drag-queen scene, and John FOR MORE EVENTS OR VISIT Patrick Shanley’s comedy seattleweekly.com Dirty Story. See intiman.org for exact schedule. Intiman Theatre, Seattle Center, 800-982-2787. $30. THE SOLID GOLD CADILLAC The Endangered Species Project reads George S. Kaufman and Howard Teichmann’s 1954 farce about “Cinderella and the Four Ugly Corporation Directors.” West of Lenin, 203 N. 36th St., endangeredspeciesproject.org. Donation. 7 p.m. Mon., July 9. SPIN THE BOTTLE Annex’s late-night variety show includes “delicious, savory smut,” “revved-up licks,” and plenty more. Annex Theatre, 1100 E. Pike St., 7280933, annextheatre.org. $5–$10. 11 p.m. Fri., July 6. SUDDENLY LAST SUMMER Lobotomies, the closet, and cannibalism are only a few of the plot points in Tennessee Williams’ notoriously overheated drama. Presented by Theatre 9/12. Trinity Episcopal Church, 609 Eighth Ave., 332-7908, theatre912.com. Pay-whatyou-can. Opens July 6. 8 p.m. Fri.–Sat., 2 p.m. Sun. (No show July 15.) Ends July 28. ZOMBIE TOWN Zombie-attack survivors tell their stories in this improv comedy. Wing-It Productions, 5510 University Way N.E., 781-3879, wingitpresents.com. $10–$14. Opens July 5. 8 p.m. Thurs.–Fri. Ends July 20. TO DOWNLOAD THE FREE

CURRENT RUNS

DUO IMPROV SHOWCASE Unexpected Productions

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, THIS IS YOUR CRISIS!

Infinity Box adapts Kate Wilhelm’s 1976 short story about TV, reality, and blurred boundaries. Ethnic Cultural Center/Theatre, 3931 Brooklyn Ave. N.E., infinitybox.org. $10–$20. 7:30 p.m. Thurs.–Sat., 2 p.m. Sun. Ends July 8. MENU Order whatever topics you like in Unexpected Productions’ “night of a la carte improv.” Market Theatre, 1428 Post Alley, 587-2414, unexpected productions.org. 8:30 p.m. Fri.–Sat. Ends July 21. LES MISÉRABLES Cosette and the gang return. 5th Avenue Theatre, 1308 Fifth Ave., 625-1900. $49 and up. See 5thavenue.org for exact schedule. Ends July 8. Send events to stage@seattleweekly.com, dance@seattleweekly.com, or classical@seattleweekly.com See seattleweekly.com for full listings. = Recommended

•

THIS

Dance

FREEDOM FANTASIA SEE THE WIRE, PAGE 17. SAPIENCE DANCE This troupe’s new work, While We

Are Human, “explores the wilderness in the city and the animal within human nature, revealing the deeply varied nuances of human desires and the complexities of living in community.” Tashiro Kaplan Lofts, 115 Prefontaine Place S., sapiencedance.org. $12–$25. 8 p.m. Fri.–Sat., 5 p.m. Sun. Ends July 15.

7:30PM

Urban styles merge with cultural traditions. Featuring the region’s finest young dancers plus guest artists/choreographers

African, african, modern, Modern, chinese, Chinese, Broadway, broadway, Tibetan, tibetan, Vietnamese, vietnamese, Hip-Hop, hip-hop, and more… with live music and spoken word

SALLY AND THOR SAVE THE WORLD (AT SUMMER CAMP) Balagan throws myths and fairy

tales into a blender in their new family show. Free. Plays weekends at 2 p.m. at various area parks; see balagantheatre.org for exact schedule. Ends Aug. 11. TEATRO ZINZANNI SEE REVIEW, PAGE 18. XANADU Making lemonade out of the lemon that was the 1980 movie musical. ArtsWest, 4711 California Ave. S.W., 938-0339, artswest.org. $10–$15. 7:30 p.m. Wed.– Sat., 3 p.m. Sun. Ends July 15.

JULY 13 & 14

STG THANKS OUR SUPPORTERS FOR INVESTING IN MEANINGFUL EXPERIENCES FOR OUR COMMUNITY AND FUTURE GENERATIONS OF PERFORMING ARTISTS.

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Classical, Etc.

• SEATTLE CHAMBER MUSIC FESTIVAL Twelve

recital/concert pairings (at 7 and 8 p.m.) through July 29, plus special events. See seattlechambermusic. org for full schedule. July 6 Recital: Violinist Marie Rossano plays Debussy, Piazzolla, and more. Concert: Prokofiev, Franck, Tchaikovsky. July 9 Recital: Pianist Inon Barnatan plays Ravel’s challenging Gaspard de la nuit. Concert: Mendelssohn, Beethoven, de Falla, and Ravel’s Piano Trio. July 11 Recital: Pianist Jeremy Denk plays Brahms’ Paganini Variations. Concert: Mozart, Dvorak, Bartok, Milhaud, Mendelssohn. Benaroya Recital Hall, Third Ave. and Union St. $15–$45. OLYMPIC MUSIC FESTIVAL Chamber music each weekend (2 p.m. Sat. & Sun.) through Sept. 2. This weekend, an all-Schubert program of songs and piano works. Olympic Music Festival, Center Road, Quilcene, 360-732-4800, olympicmusicfestival.org. $14–$20 lawn, $18–$30 barn. RED STURM Music of Mexican composer Federico Ibarra from this pianist. Chapel Performance Space, 4649 Sunnyside Ave. N., 789-1939, waywardmusic. blogspot.com. $5–$15. 8 p.m. Sat., July 7. ICICLE CREEK CHAMBER MUSIC FESTIVAL Six concerts in the lovely Canyon Wren Recital Hall, July 8–21. On the opening gala, Festival musicians present personal favorites. Icicle Creek Music Center, Leavenworth, Wash., 509-548-6347, icicle.org. $8–$20. NORTHWEST MAHLER FESTIVAL Reading sessions (through July 12) of the orchestra’s grandest repertory; see nwmahlerfestival.org for registration info. On July 9, John Falskow leads Mahler’s tragic Sixth. To close, on July 12, Nikolas Caoile conducts Mahler’s resigned but shattering Ninth. Saint Mark’s Episcopal Cathedral, 1245 Tenth Ave. E. 7 p.m. EASTSIDE SINGS Four informal readings of choral masterworks, Tuesdays at 7 p.m. July 10–31. To open, Handel’s Messiah. First Presbyterian Church of Bellevue, 1717 Bellevue Way N.E., Bellevue, 425-881-0445, kirklandchoralsociety.org. $7. METROPOLITAN OPERA AT THE MOVIES Summer encore broadcasts of the past season’s best shows. This week, Joseph Calleja plays the hapless hero of Offenbach’s The Tales of Hoffmann. See fathomevents. com for participating theaters. 6:30 p.m. Wed., July 11. COMPOSER SPOTLIGHT Seattle jazz composer Daniel Barry discusses his work and methods, especially his recent residency in Brazil. Jack Straw Studios, 4261 Roosevelt Way N.E., jackstraw.org. Free. 7:30 p.m. Wed., July 11.

•

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Seattle w ee kly • July 4−10, 2012

presents comedians two at a time. Market Theatre, 1428 Post Alley, 587-2414, unexpectedproductions.org. $5. 8:30 p.m. Wednesdays. HANSEL AND GRETEL Sally Gander’s British panto-style play looks at what happens after the witch goes into the oven. Volunteer Park, 1247 15th Ave. E., 324-5801, schmeater.org. Free. 5 p.m. Sat.–Sun. Ends Aug. 5. IN TENTS Teatro ZinZanni’s kid-friendly spinoff cabaret. Teatro ZinZanni, 222 Mercer St., 802-0015. $19–$22. Runs 11 a.m. some Sat.–Sun. through July 15; see dreams.zinzanni.org for exact schedule.

stories in an evening. Market Theatre, 1428 Post Alley, 587-2414, unexpectedproductions.org. $15. 8:30 p.m. Thurs. Ends July 19. ONE SLIGHT HITCH After 30 years of tinkering, Lewis Black’s would-be farce, set in the early ’80s, is surprisingly bland, nothing like his Daily Show rants. It’s by no means terrible, but droll when it ought to be funny and hollow when it should be heartwarming. The semiautobiographical plot unfolds around the wedding of Courtney (Kimberley Sustad) and Harper (John Ulman). In stumbles Ryan (Shawn Telford), the bride’s jilted ex-boyfriend. Courtney’s two sisters (Katherine GrantSuttie and Kirsten Potter) comment on the ensuing hijinks. The cast’s standout is R. Hamilton Wright as the bride’s father; everyone’s at their best when working off him. From a lesser comic talent than Black, One Slight Hitch would be at worst an inoffensive little gambol. But his fame, and our expectations, work against him. KEVIN PHINNEY ACT Theatre, 700 Union St., 292-7676. $15 and up. Runs Tues.–Sun.; see acttheatre.org for exact schedule. Ends July 8.

14th A Nnua l

NINE LIVES Improv troupe Fat Kid Magic takes on nine

BY GAVIN BORCHERT

SCAN T H I S CO D E

STG PRESENTS

TOWN HALL HIGHLIGHTS 7/3 - 7/16

Tuesday, 7/3 at 7 pm

Clarion West Summer Reading Series: George R.R. Martin

Monday, 7/9 at 7:30 pm

Christopher Hayes with Luke Burbank

Tuesday, 7/10 at 7:30 pm

Rajiv Chandrasekaran: Afghanistan Behind the War

Chandrasekaran reveals the behind-the-scenes story of the struggle to remake Afghanistan.

Wednesday, 7/11 at 7:30 pm

Frank Partnoy: The Art & Science of Delay Partnoy shows how all decisions benefit from being made at the last possible moment.

Thursday, 7/12 at 7:30 pm

Brian Fagan: Brave Mariners Fagan reveals how seafaring changed the course of human history.

Sunday, 7/15 at 6:30 pm

Poetry+Motion: My America Seattle poets read and local dancers perform new pieces inspired by the poets’ words.

Monday, 7/16 at 7:30 pm

Science: Jesse Bering: Of Penises and Suicides

BY MA’CHELL DUMA LAVASSAR

Openings & Events TRACY ADAMS & ROBIN DENEVAN Featured are

new paintings in Tracy Adams’ Oblique Intentions and Denevan’s Horizons. First Thursday opening reception 6–8 p.m. Patricia Rovzar Gallery, 1225 Second Ave., 223-0273, rovzargallery.com. July 5–Aug. 1, 11 a.m.– 5 p.m. ADELE EUSTIS Bringing It Home showcases drawings of nest structures plus sculptures made of twigs and old books. First Thursday reception 5–8 p.m. Shift Collaborative Studio, 306 S. Washington St. (Tashiro Kaplan Building), 547-1215, shiftstudio.org. Opens July 6. Fri.–Sat., noon–5 p.m. Through July 28. BAM’S FREE FIRST FRIDAY Strapped for cash? BAM offers free admission every first Friday of the month. Here’s your chance to check out the museum’s current exhibits, including Mary Lee Hu’s jewelry and Corrine Riley’s quilts. Bellevue Arts Museum, 510 Bellevue Way N.E., 425-519-0770, bellevuearts.org. Free. 11 a.m.–5 p.m. Fri., July 6. DOWNTOWN ISSAQUAH ARTWALK Venues include artEAST Art Center, Museo Art Academy, and ArtByFire. With music by Acoustic Couti, Sold Only as Curio, and Kaleidoscope School of Music. See downtownissaquah.com. Fri., July 6, 5–8 p.m. EXTRAORDINARY IN THE EVERYDAY Nearly two dozen emerging painters, sculptors, choreographers, poets, and musicians come together for this special performance. Artists include Heather D’Arnell, Cha Davis, and Sophia Wheelwright. Fremont Abbey Arts Center, 4272 Fremont Ave. N., 701-9270, fremontabbey. org. $8–$15. Sat., July 7, 7–11 p.m. JEFF FONTAINE (dis)order showcases the Portland artist’s industrial panels, which combine graffiti, oil sprays, and rust. First Thursday reception 5–8 p.m. Friesen Abmeyer Fine Art, 1210 Second Ave., 628-9501, friesenabmeyer.com. Opens July 5. Tues.–Sat., 11 a.m.–5:30 p.m.; Sun., noon–5 p.m. Through July 31. FREMONT ART WALK Venues include Activspace, Fremont Brewing Co., 509 Winery and Tasting Room, Caffé Vita, and Fremont Abbey. (See fremontfirstfriday. com for participating artists.) 6–9 p.m. Fri., July 6. GAYLEN HANSEN The veteran Eastern Washington artist shows new paintings of whimsical animals and other figures. First Thursday opening reception 6–8 p.m. Linda Hodges Gallery, 316 First Ave. S., 624-3034, lindahodgesgallery.com. Opens July 5. Tues.–Fri., 10:30 a.m.–5 p.m.; Sat., 11 a.m.–5 p.m. Through July 28. BARRY HEREM Beyond Beyond features new metal, glass, concrete, and wooden sculpture rendering traditional themes of Northwest Coast art. First Thursday reception 6–8 p.m. Stonington Gallery, 119 S. Jackson St., 405-4040, stoningtongallery.com. Opens July 6. Mon.–Fri., 10 a.m.–6 p.m.; Sat., 10 a.m.–5:30 p.m.; Sun., noon–5 p.m. Through July 29. GUY LARAMÉE AND CARA BARER Mountains features Laramée’s carved-up, sandblasted book sculptures. Barer’s photographs in Bound and Unbound turn book pages into floral forms. First Thursday reception 6–8 p.m. Call for ongoing hours. Foster/White Gallery, 220 Third Ave. S., 622-2833, fosterwhite.com. July 5–28. LOUDER THAN BOMBS From L.A. and Portland, respectively, Marie Koetje and Mark Schoening present separate work in a variety of media addressing information overload. First Thursday opening reception 6–8 p.m. Platform Gallery, 114 Third Ave. S. (Tashiro Kaplan Building), 323-2808, platformgallery.com. Opens July 5. Wed.–Sat., 11 a.m.–5:30 p.m. Through July 28. DON MOORE He shows colorful new figurative works. First Friday opening reception 6–8 p.m. Call for ongoing hours. Winslow Art Center, 278 Winslow Way E., Bainbridge Island, 206-618-3112, winslowartcenter. com. July 6–31. CASS NEVADA Measuring 20 feet long when its pages are unfolded, her art-book installation is called This Home We Share. First Thursday opening reception 5–8 p.m. Shift Collaborative Studio, 306 S. Washington St. (Tashiro Kaplan Building), 547-1215, shiftstudio.org. Opens July 6. Fri., Sat., noon–5 p.m. Through July 28. NEW BLOOD Featured in this group show are Ryan Doran, Emmanuel Monzon, Sabe Lewellyn, Peter Serko, Michael Shephard, and Fab. First Thursday opening 6–8 p.m. and artist reception Thurs., July 12, 6–8 p.m. Call for gallery hours. Gallery 110, 110 Third Ave. S. (Tashiro Kaplan Building), 624-9336, gallery110.com. July 5–28.

•

Send events to visualarts@seattleweekly.com See seattleweekly.com for full listings = Recommended

•

EUGENE PARNELL He shows new work. First Thursday

reception 6–8 p.m. Call for ongoing hours. Punch Gallery, 119 Prefontaine Place S. (Tashiro Kaplan Building), 621-1945, punchgallery.org. July 5–31. NEIL PHILPOTT The Oregon artist paints nature scenes in New Landscapes. Artist reception Sat. July 6, 6–8 p.m. Roby King Galleries, 176 Winslow Way E., Bainbridge Island, robykinggalleries.com. Opens July 6. Tues.–Sat., 10 a.m.–5:30 p.m. Through July 28. PICNIC This summer-themed group show features painters Gillian Bull, Diane Culhane, Megan Drew, and a dozen more. Also on view: Morgan Brig’s toys in an exhibit called The Whole Conundrum. Opening reception Sat., July 6, 6–8 p.m. Bainbridge Arts and Crafts, 151 Winslow Way E., Bainbridge Island, 206-842-3132, bacart.org. July 6–30. [RE] CURRENT EDITIONS Philanthropist and arts patron Virginia Wright and her old Current Editions gallery (1967–1974) are honored with a retrospective print show featuring the likes of Josef Albers, Chuck Close, and Jasper Johns—plus two dozen others. First Thursday opening reception 6–8 p.m. Wright will conduct a personal walk-through on Sat., July 7 at noon. Greg Kucera Gallery, 212 Third Ave. S., 624-0770, greg kucera.com. Opens July 5. Tues.–Sat., 10:30 a.m.–5:30 p.m. Through Aug. 18. BRYAN SCHONEMAN Attempts at Bedrock fills the gallery with planters expected to bloom during the show’s run. Schoneman employs soil and Rube Goldberg-style mechanisms to fill his plant beds. First Thursday opening reception 6–8 p.m. Gallery4Culture, 101 Prefontaine Place S. (Tashiro Kaplan Building), 296-7580, 4culture.org. Opens July 5. Mon.–Fri., 9 a.m.–5 p.m. Through July 27. SEATTLE OUTSIDE Featured in this group show are Robert Connell, Art Hansen, Lockwood Dennis, Michael DalCerro, Jennifer Worsley, Jonelle Johnson, Douglas Cooper, William E. Elston, Patrick Anderson, and others. Also on view, animal imagery by Briony Morrow-Cribbs (called Scientia Carnalis) and Tallmadge Doyle’s plate etchings of nature scenes. First Thursday opening reception 6–8 p.m. Davidson Galleries, 313 Occidental Ave. S., 624-1324, davidsongalleries.com. Opens July 5. Tues.–Sat., 10 a.m.–5:30 p.m. Through July 28. STAMPWATCHING Postage! More than 150 vintage stamps on display, from England to Tibet. First Thursday opening reception 5–7 p.m. Paper Hammer, 1400 Second Ave., 682-3820, paper-hammer.com. Opens July 5. Mon.–Sat., 11 a.m.–6 p.m. Through July 28.

•

TheFussyeye » by brian miller

Indoor Tempest

You can see the sea in both directions, east and west, from the PACCAR Pavilion. One set of waves is outdoors, the other inside: Encontro das Águas, painted in filigreed silver on a marine-blue background by visiting Brazilian artist Sandra Cinto. The huge mural, making an obvious nod to Hokusai’s famous wave, was created over two weeks in April. Cinto’s less-obvious homage is daubed on the inside hull of an old wooden dinghy, locally sourced, which supposedly references Théodore Géricault’s The Raft of the Medusa (I don’t see the resemblance at all). The west-facing, sun-scorched pavilion is a great place for cocktail parties, fundraisers, and weddings, but it’s problematic for the art. All that UV is destructive, meaning that long-term, largescale installations—like last year’s giant plastic hand by Trenton Doyle Hancock—have to be

STICKS AND STONES Anthony Sonnenberg, Emily

Nachison, and Carolyn Hopkins promise “a jungle of sorts, full of plant, animal, and mineral representations.” Also on view: Verdant, paintings by Saya Moriyasu. First Thursday opening reception 6–8 p.m. Soil Gallery, 112 Third Ave. S. (Tashiro Kaplan Building), 264-8061, soilart.org. Opens July 5. Wed.–Sat. Through July 28. SUMMER FASHION: WEARABLE ART The opening First Friday art walk, Fri., July 6, 5:30–8 p.m., features outdoor music from the Julie Duke Band. Artists include David, Sandra Holzman, Chrzaszcz, Janet Essa, Carol Lee Shanks, and Odd Numbers. Call for ongoing hours. The Island Gallery, 400 Winslow Way E., Bainbridge Island, 206-780-9500, theislandgallery.net. July 7–29. KELLIE TALBOT & LARK PREYAPONGPISAN They show new and separate work. First Thursday reception 6–8 p.m. Call for ongoing hours. Core Gallery, 117 Prefontaine Place S. (Tashiro Kaplan Building), 467-4444, coregallery.org. July 5–31. ALICIA TORMEY Drifting puts delicate organic forms on wood panels. First Thursday artist reception 6–8 p.m. Grover/Thurston Gallery, 319 Third Ave. S., 223-0816, groverthurston.com. Opens July 5. Tues.–Sat., 11 a.m.– 5 p.m. Through Aug. 18. WALLINGFORD ART WALK Participating venues and galleries include Stu Stu Studios, Fuel Coffee, Julia’s Restaurant, and Oasis Art Gallery. See wallingfordart walk.org for full roster of attractions. 6–9 p.m. Wed., July 4. MARIE WATT Now based in New York, the Seattle-born Native American artist uses wool blankets in sculptural forms. Says the artist, “A blanket is a catcher of dreams and ledger of secrets. Wool blankets are the pelts of our animal relatives, the sheep.” First Thursday opening reception 6–8 p.m. Greg Kucera Gallery, 212 Third Ave. S., 624-0770, gregkucera.com. Opens July 5. Tues.–Sat., 10:30 a.m.–5:30 p.m. Through Oct. 7.

•

Ongoing

• ANCESTRAL MODERN: AUSTRALIAN

ABORIGINAL ART FROM THE KAPLAN & LEVI COLLECTION Over 100 pieces from Australian

aboriginal artists, from the late 20th to early 21st century, will be on view. Seattle Art Museum, 1300 First Ave., 654-3100, seattleartmuseum.org. $12–$15. Thurs.–Fri., 10 a.m.–9 p.m.; Wed., Sat.–Sun., 10 a.m.– 5 p.m. Through Sept. 2.

both temporary and somewhat disposable. Cinto accordingly uses cheap, durable paint (the silver comes from one of those graffiti pens), and the pram could’ve been dragged out of some dusty garage in Ballard. Next spring, her waves will be calmed with a new coat of white, and some new artwork will take their place. Turning to the west, I wondered what would become of the boat,

BRIAN MILLER

Seattle weekly • Ju ly 4−10, 2012

www.townhallseattle.org

arts»Visual Arts

whose hull seems sound. Add back the mast and it could be sailed into Elliott Bay, having weathered the indoor storm. Olympic Sculpture Park, 2901 Western Ave., 654-3100, seattleart museum.org. Free. 10 a.m.–5 p.m. Tues.–Sun. Ends April 14, 2013.

film»This Week’s Attractions July 6–12 | 206.324.9996 | siff.net

FOX SEARCHLIGHT

P The Amazing Spider-Man

OPENS TUES., JULY 3 AT CINERAMA AND OTHER THEATERS. RATED PG-13. 138 MINUTES.

P A Cat in Paris

RUNS FRI., JULY 6–THURS., JULY 12 AT VARSITY. RATED PG. 69 MINUTES.

First be warned, this animated French tale about a cat burglar and his companion in crime, a cat, has been dubbed into English. Meaning English English—Brits who adopt a

variety of comic vocal inflections (including one French accent—go figure). It makes no sense; the film is not called A Cat in London. Now be delighted: A Cat in Paris is a gem, a treat not to be missed by children or their parents (or animation-loving adults without kids). The graphic style of Jean-Loup Felicioli and Alain Gagnol is crisp, flat, and bright, their characters rendered with linework recalling the Matisse and Picasso of ’30s Paris. There are even traces of Tintin, and a simple comic-book plot to suit. Her father recently murdered, her policewoman mother obsessed with the case, lonely little Zoe has an affectionate pet cat named Dino. When she goes to bed at night, Dino bounds across the moonlit rooftops and leaps from building to building, leading the honorable, rubbery-armed burglar Nico to the loot (mostly jewelry, and from rich people who won’t notice it’s gone). One such outing leads to a nest of gangsters— more comic than truly scary for kids—connected with the death of Zoe’s father. But no more plot. The almond eyes, sailor pants, and tiny feet; the sun-washed checkerboard kitchen floors; the soundtrack strains of Billie Holiday and Django Reinhardt—all create a storybook Paris of the imagination, of the artist’s easel. BRIAN MILLER

The Color Wheel RUNS FRI., JULY 6–THURS., JULY 12 AT NORTHWEST FILM FORUM. NOT RATED. 83 MINUTES.

Alex Ross Perry’s second feature, shot in 16mm black-and-white, is an offhand-picturesque road-trip movie with a mock-epic Northeastern itinerary. It’s also a cage-match brotherand-sister act revolving around the curiously complementary relationship between JR (Carlen Altman), a defiantly unemployable broadcast-journalism major, and her younger brother, Colin (director Perry), whom she

The Do-Deca-Pentathlon OPENS FRI., JULY 6 AT SIFF CINEMA UPTOWN. NOT RATED. 80 MINUTES.

Those alarmingly prolific Duplass brothers, Mark and Jay, are back with another tale of sibling rivalry, close on the heels of Jeff, Who Lives at Home. (When will they make a movie about rivalrous sisters?) Here, Steve Zissis and Mark Kelly play two soft-bellied bros in their unhappy 30s. One’s married and a father, the other’s a poker-playing black sheep. All convene at Mom’s house for a weekend birthday gathering, where the brothers resurrect a 25-event contest that ended in a bitter tie when they were teens. Ping-pong, laser tag, bumper cars, mini-golf, and holding one’s breath underwater are among the categories on a contract they solemnly sign, wherein the winner shall be declared “the better brother for eternity.” All the while, mother, wife, and son must be kept in the dark about the contest (though they eventually catch on). Do-Deca apparently sat on the shelf for a while after Baghead, but it’s a better, funnier, but still awkward film (that’s a compliment)—and an advance beyond mumblecore. Still, it’s not so good as the Duplass brothers’ subsequent Jeff or Cyrus, which had scripts and character development to fit their run times. Do-Deca is more a comic sketch extended to 80 minutes when 30 would’ve sufficed. But it does contain a fundamental truth about at least some brothers: “We have fun by beating the shit out of each other.” BRIAN MILLER

Opens July 6 Uptown

Last Call at the Oasis

Opens July 6 | Uptown

Extended Engagement Uptown

The Do-Deca- People Pentathalon Like Us July 7

12:30 & 3:00

Uptown

Frankenstein directed by Danny Boyle July 7–8 1:00 Uptown

Films4Families:

July 12 7:00 | Uptown

Robocop:

Enchanted

Shoot Along

July 11 7:00 | Film Center

July 9 6:30 | Film Center BALLET

Invisibles

Le Corsaire

FILM SERIES

Command Performance in HD!

Opens July 6 | Film Center

“CRITICS’ PICK!

HEARTFELT & INTIMATE. IT’S HARD NOT TO BE MOVED.”

– NEW YORK MAGAZINE

A NASHVILLE STAR COMES OUT AND FINDS HER TRUE VOICE

P El Velador

RUNS FRI., JULY 6–THURS., JULY 12 AT NORTHWEST FILM FORUM. NOT RATED. 72 MINUTES.

Only once is the director’s voice heard in Natalia Almada’s ruminative yet potent documentary about the carnage that has piled up during Mexico’s intractable drug war. Of a cigarette-puffing laborer in a Modelo Light T-shirt, Almada innocuously asks, “Do you always smoke while mixing plaster?” His reply—”It’s how I measure time”—hints at another kind of calculation, tallied by newscasters intermittently throughout El Velador: the number of deaths that day, that week, that month, that year related to narco-trafficking.

» CONTINUED ON PAGE 22

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Seattle w ee kly • July 4−10, 2012

Spider-Man’s story is some primal-ass teenage wish fulfillment: nerds beating jocks, astonishing old people, romancing hot girls, dangling criminals from rooftops, fighting awesome monsters, and for God’s sake, people, we’re not made of stone here. The Amazing Spider-Man, an inexcusably good reboot-thing from director Marc Webb, celebrates the heartwarming arachno-genetic bar mitzvah in which a boy becomes a spider and a spider becomes a man. Boy genius Peter Parker, played charmingly by Chia-haired Andrew Garfield, tours the Oscorp lab of Dr. Curt Connors (Rhys Ifans), a kindly, nonmad scientist recklessly tampering with the fundamental forces of nature, as one does. Dr. Connors’ facility includes a sealed room full of genetically altered spiders into which Peter sneaks while everyone else is distracted by unlikely Hollywood computer interfaces. Reader, the spider bites him. Credit Sony with making an unconventional choice in Webb, whose great (500) Days of Summer was not an obvious debut for the director of a high-profile, big-budget action film. It’s all sharp of wit and sweetly sentimental for lots of reasons, including Martin Sheen and Sally Field as Peter’s Uncle Ben and Aunt May and a peroxide-haired, superbad Emma Stone as a gently ironic Gwen Stacy, Peter Parker’s first girlfriend. A bit—how do you say—boring in the comics, Gwen is retrofitted here with personality and independence, a damsel in only moderate distress. Denis Leary, as Captain Stacy, father of Gwen, evinces his signature growly sarcasm and hits unexpectedly sweet notes of paternal affection. CHRIS PACKHAM

Mark (Zissis) wins the underwater breath-holding competition in The Do-Deca Pentathlon.

recruits as backup while she clears her belongings out of the Boston home of her professor and ex-lover, Neil (Bob Byington). It is at first a mystery to both Colin and the viewer as to why he has been selected for this task, for he and his sister have a habit of saying to each other, point-blank, the cruelest things they can think of. “You make me, Mom and Dad, and my girlfriend sick to our stomachs every time you come up in conversation,” is one of Colin’s characteristic tossed-off lines. Gloves-off verbal abuse, it turns out, is the mother tongue in The Color Wheel, delivered in blistering fusillades by characters far too nasty and tetchy to ingratiate themselves— though they’re vividly individual monsters of id. Like Howard Hawks’ Twentieth Century, it’s a travelogue movie about a couple whose impossible, porcupine personalities leave them safe, finally, for nobody’s company but each other’s. NICK PINKERTON

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film» This Week’s Attractions » FROM PAGE 21

Savages

Still, violence remains resolutely offscreen in El Velador (the title translates to “The Night Watchman”). Almada’s focus—quiet and unobtrusive—is instead fixed on its aftermath and its grotesque incongruities. These include the garish, towering mausoleums built for the slain narco-traffickers, which are tended by widows still in their 20s whose tiny children transform the graveyard into a playground. Martin, the guard of the title, who arrives at dusk every day in an aqua pickup, is tasked with the futile chore of watering large patches of sunbaked dirt. A vendor just outside the necropolis sells mangoes on a stick and coconut water; the dull, busy sounds of cement being mixed and bricks being laid for more opulent tombs is punctured by an unseen mother’s wail: “My son!” Complementing the film’s powerful sound design is Almada’s eye for pungent detail within her static compositions. MELISSA ANDERSON

“Welcome to the recession, boys,” says John Travolta’s DEA-double-agent profiteer in Oliver Stone’s Savages, a movie of its moment, though both its good guys and bad guys (if there’s really even a difference) are unquestionably among the 1 percent of their industry—the weed trade. The setting is the 100 miles surrounding the California/Mexico border circa right this minute, with Stone focusing on the human and fiscal politics of

To Rome With Love OPENS FRI., JULY 6 AT GUILD 45TH AND MERIDIAN. RATED R. 112 MINUTES.

OPENS FRI., JULY 6 AT PACIFIC PLACE AND OTHER THEATERS. RATED R. 127 MINUTES.

Palette

FRANCOIS DUHAMEL/UNIVERSAL

TICKETS AVAILABLE AT WWW.CINERAMA.COM

In Woody Allen’s latest, people—like, really young people—still talk, improbably, about “neuroses.” Horny businessmen actually stand around the water cooler and ogle the hot secretary, as in the Playboy cartoons of the ancients. In the Allen Legendarium, Freudian psychiatrists still roam the land like the tragic elves of Middle-earth. All of which is completely OK, because, like Tolkien, Allen has created a magical universe in which these things persist. This time, a Love Boat’s worth of stars—Alec Baldwin, Roberto Benigni, Penélope Cruz, Judy Davis, Jesse Eisenberg, Greta Gerwig, Ellen Page, Allen himself— breeze through four Roman tales that include farces involving prostitutes and opera singers, as well as one Zelig-style fantasy and an artful exploration of memory. Allen deserves credit for his continued ability to stage absurd set pieces, and his Rome—shot by Darius Khondji—is luminous. Still, just as old men’s ears and noses develop into exaggerated, cartilaginous bulbs, his problematic portrayals of women have become more pronounced over the years: Women throw themselves in groups into the married Benigni’s bed; Allen the screenwriter overtly states that wives understand that they have to “share” their famous husbands; and goddammit, Woody Allen, you don’t have to articulate every gross idea that goes through your head. But he seems without actual ill intent here, and the film is set in a wondrous realm, as evidenced by architects who still draw with pencils and T-squares and impoverished college students who propose “sailing around the boot” of Italy but who never mention their magical sacks of gold. CHRIS PACKHAM

Primary

Hayek shows her mean streak in Savages.

California’s twin pot economies, one quasiSecondary legal and the other criminal—a split that the film suggests can only last so long. More than two hours long—and building to two endings, one romantic-tragic and one quasi-ironic and romantic-ludicrous—Savages is bloated with plot and exposition, much of which is related via the incessant voice-over of Ophelia (Blake Lively), quite literally the voice of the movie, a responsibility the character is too wispy to shoulder. Taylor Kitsch and Aaron Johnson, as California dudes dragged into a turf war with the expansion-minded Mexican cartel, register as blanks onscreen. In contrast, Salma Hayek and Benicio del Toro, both sporting apparently intentionally terrible wigs, give big, scenery-chewing performances, earning our interest and empathy even while committing heinous acts. The film’s micro-timeAll tints of secondary colors capsule approach is interesting, butcollage Stone’sand size small to Rotate, indulgence in both above-the-law fantasy and the only-in-Hollywood notion that love trumps business are more potent than any point he’s trying to make about our real world.

Design Assets

KARINA LONGWORTH E

film@seattleweekly.com

ONLINE » SEATTLEWEEKLY.COM aMORE See reviews of Katy Perry: Part of Me and

Wish Me Away.

film» BY BRIAN MILLER

Local Film BASEKETBALL Directed by David Zucker and starring

• •

THE FILMS OF JEAN • QUEEN OFSEESCREWBALL: THE WIRE, PAGE 17. ARTHUR

Send events to film@seattleweekly.com See seattleweekly.com for full listings = Recommended

•

ties are screened, as curated by Gem Seddon. (NR) Northwest Film Forum, $6-$10, Thu., July 5, 7 p.m. SILENT MOVIE MONDAYS SEE THE WIRE, PAGE 17. THAT’S ENTERTAINMENT! MGM salutes its movie musicals in this enjoyable 1974 clip reel, featuring Fred Astaire and just about every other star who wore tap shoes. Call for showtimes. (G) Sundance Cinemas, $8-$10.50, Wed., July 4.

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Ongoing

MONTHLY IC S U M B R E V E R and are Now Available Fire! le on Kindle and Kind S! EEK EE FOR TWO W FR W O N IT Y TR

• BERNIE In a 1997 murder trial in Carthage, Texas,

Bernhardt “Bernie” Tiede, a closeted ex-mortician, confessed to the shooting of his benefactress, 81-year-old millionaire widow Marjorie Nugent. In Richard Linklater’s movie, Shirley MacLaine is Nugent, by almost all accounts a sour and unpleasant woman, clutching her purse like a floatation device. Matthew McConaughey is district attorney Danny Buck Davidson, and Jack Black plays Tiede, tackling his duties as church-choir soloist and community-theater impresario, in a performance remarkable for its ability to be at once flamboyant and remote. Bernie is all about irreconcilable facts and foggy motives, not least the contrary demands of forgiveness written in the Bible and the stern punishment written in the law books. It is the rarest of rarities: a truly unexpected film. (PG-13) Nick Pinkerton Harvard Exit THE BEST EXOTIC MARIGOLD HOTEL Reliable middlebrow craftsman John Madden makes neat work of Deborah Moggach’s novel about a group of disparate British retirees lured—for cut-rate surgery, low-overhead living, or reasons they hope to keep private—to India. The cast is led by Dame Judi Dench as a long-sheltered widow looking to stand on her own two feet. Marigold Hotel has that oh-so-tactful British touch, the seeming result of an industry-wide gentleman’s agreement never to go too far. The material is ribald but, of course, never crude and sewn with “Life begins at 60” affirmations. Although the film is overextended by a few plotlines too many, you’ll look forward to Tom Wilkinson’s turn as a retired high court judge who still goes fluttery over the memory of an affair from schoolboy days and Bill Nighy as a shy, ineffably decent man, quietly surprised by how nimble he becomes in this new atmosphere. (PG-13) Nick Pinkerton Seven Gables I WISH Hirokazu Koreeda doesn’t direct children so much as let them react to the universe he has created. The siblings at the center of I Wish, played by real-life brothers Koki and Ohshiro Maeda, often seem oblivious to the cameras around them. It’s this child’s-eye view of the world that makes the premise of I Wish, one that should be intolerably schmaltzy, actually work. Twelveyear-old Koichi (Koki) is living in the south of Kyushu island with his mother. His younger brother Ryunosuke (Ohshiro) is with his father in the north. All Koichi wants is for his family to be reunited. So he hatches a plan: to make a wish on the initial run of the soon-to-becompleted bullet train, which will speed from one end of the island to the other. He has been told that when the northbound and southbound trains pass each other for the first time, the intense energy will be enough to make miracles happen. Koreeda allows his performers to guide the journey, both literally to a town at the midpoint of the region and emotionally to a coming-ofage moment. (PG) Alison Willmore Harvard Exit MAGIC MIKE When Channing Tatum stood up and revealed his bare ass to the camera a minute or two into Steven Soderbergh’s Magic Mike, the audience burst into a near-unanimous extended cheer. Tatum’s appeal is based on working-class humility paired with otherworldly charisma, an impossible body, and the intelligence to make his use of it seem effortless. The highly calculated Magic Mike is pure Hollywood selfmythology: a neo-Depression musical, a wish-fulfillment fantasy for shitty times, another origin-of-the-star story. Tatum’s Mike is the main attraction at a Tampa strip club whose dancers cater to an all-female clientele. It’s also a self-reflexive portrait of three distinct points in the Hollywood himbo life cycle: Tatum’s 30-year-old Mike mentors scrappy newbie Adam (Alex Pettyfer), a 19-year-old rebel; Mike himself was discovered by Dallas (Matthew McConaughey), the club’s manager/ main hustler. An extremely conventional backstage story is occasionally enlivened by Soderbergh’s aesthetic curveballs. But the film ultimately damns the margins and endorses the mainstream. (R) Karina Longworth Lincoln Square, Meridian, Thornton Place, Varsity MEN IN BLACK 3 The ticket price has changed since the first MiB in 1997, but not the product. Agent J (Will Smith) and Agent K (Tommy Lee Jones) have retained their affable repartee. Boris “The Animal” (Jemaine Clement), an intergalactic hellion who K collared and crippled in 1969, then busts out of lunar prison and devises a complete do-over of the past 40 years by

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Seattle w ee kly • July 4−10, 2012

Trey Parker and Matt Stone, this 1998 sports comedy is certainly an entertaining way to spend a couple of air-conditioned hours. Joe “Coop” Cooper (pudgy, bottle-blond Parker) and Doug Remer (skinny, Afroheaded Stone) invent a brand-new sport that everyone can play—a sport that actually cultivates “trash talking” as a skill. Unlike every other pro league, the BASEketball players and teams are forbidden to sell themselves to the highest bidder. And their cheerleaders don’t pull any punches about the real nature of their job: They’re strippers who don’t strip. Despite the predictability of the plot, BASEketball doesn’t feel throw-away: the oneliners and slapstick are piled on thick enough that if one pratfall doesn’t work, there’s another funnier one just seconds away. Parker and Stone share the kind of best-pal chemistry that can’t be faked, and though they’re playing themselves, it works for at least one film, just the way it did with Bill and Ted, and Wayne and Garth. Call for showtimes. (R) JACKIE MCCARTHY Central Cinema, $6-$8, July 6-11. BELLEVUE OUTDOOR MOVIES This Thursday-night series begins with Puss in Boots. Following titles include The Sophia Way, Happy Feet 2, Zookeeper, The Adventures of Tintin, Soul Surfer, Big Miracle, Dolphin Tale, and We Bought a Zoo. See intelius.com/ summermovies for rotating venues. (PG) Downtown Bellevue Park, 10201 N.E. Fourth St., Free, Opens July 10, Tuesdays, 7:30 p.m. Through Aug. 28. THE BIG HEAT Glenn Ford plays an obsessed cop in Fritz Lang’s memorable 1953 crime drama, with Gloria Grahame and Lee Marvin in fine support. No late show Fri., Mon., Tues. Extra Sat.-Sun shows at 5 p.m. (NR) Grand Illusion, $5-$8, July 6-12, 7 & 9 p.m. ENCHANTED Disney’s ebullient, irreverent 2007 pop musical plucks a fair-skinned maiden from her animated kingdom and plunks her down in the mean, live-action streets of NYC—whereupon the disoriented Giselle (Amy Adams, in a blissful screwball performance) is rescued by a divorced divorce lawyer (Patrick Dempsey) who wonders if he shouldn’t cart her off to Bellevue. A vain, troll-slaying prince (James Marsden) and the requisite wicked stepmother/queen (Susan Sarandon) are soon to follow. Enchanted’s screenwriter, Bill Kelly, and director, Kevin Lima, apply their rapier wit to the vernacular of storybook fantasies and to Uncle Walt’s storehouse of kiddie-matinee classics, sending them up without violating their elemental appeal. Unlike the Shrek movies, Enchanted isn’t pop-culture doused and too cool for the room. It’s the sort of buoyant, all-ages entertainment that Hollywood has been laboring to revive in recent years, but hasn’t managed to get right until now. (PG) SCOTT FOUNDAS SIFF Cinema Uptown, $4, Sat., July 7, 1 p.m.; Sun., July 8, 1 p.m. LABYRINTH Before she was an Oscar winner and sex symbol for the Hubert Selby Jr. set, Jennifer Connelly was a 16-year-old ingénue starring opposite Kabukistyle, feathered-hair-metal goblin king David Bowie in Muppet master Jim Henson’s 1986 one-of-a-kind fantasy flick. The film is a loony artifact from the pre-CG era when the rights to Lord of the Rings were apparently still tied up. (Henson uses puppets instead of computers, of course.) It’s a fairy-tale take on pubescence, as reluctant babysitter Connelly rashly wishes her wee crying brother would be taken by goblins—which naturally occurs. To retrieve the infant requires various tests and transformations in a journey through a Brothers Grimm carnival, with Sendak and Escher booths just off the midway. Connelly must also endure the amorous attentions (and songs) of Bowie—and, yes, there’s some sexual subtext as Connelly nears womanhood. (For girls who grew up in the ’80s, being transported in a soap bubble to a masked ball where Bowie serenades you with the synth-pop ballad “As the World Falls Down”—overdue for a karaoke revival, by the way—might seem the height of romance; now grown, those same girls know that most marriages to goblins end in divorce. Sad but true.) Another enduring oddity of the film: Though Connelly now looks quite different, Bowie seems eerily unchanged. Because goblin kings never age. You decide whether the same holds true for the film. Call for showtimes. (PG) BRIAN MILLER Central Cinema, $6-$8, July 6-11.

SEARCH & RESCUE Found footage and other oddi-

film» traveling back in time to assassinate a young K. To prevent this, J has to preventatively travel to ‘69 himself, where he partners with a young K (Josh Brolin, doing a fair TLJ impersonation) and hustles against time to hunt down Boris. The resulting film says practically nothing about the world of 1969, but a great deal about our present-day blockbuster morass. Barry Sonnenfeld directs. (PG-13) Nick Pinkerton Lincoln Square, Pacific Place, Thornton Place MOONRISE KINGDOM It’s 1965, the rainy end of summer on the rocky coast of a fictional New England isle. Twelve-year-old Sam (Jared Gilman) disappears from the Scout camp run by Randy Ward (Edward Norton). Also 12, bad-seed Suzy (Kara Hayward) flees her distracted lawyer parents (Frances McDormand and Bill Murray). Aided by what remains of Ward’s troop (“It’s a chance to do some first-class scouting!”), the grown-ups, including Bruce Willis’ Captain Sharp, mobilize to find the fugitive young lovers. Moonrise takes the form of old-fashioned preteen literature, but, as everything made by Wes Anderson, does so knowingly. The escape Sam engineers for the pair is dangerous and crazy, but it’s also a way for him to exercise control, and to show off to a receptive audience. Suzy doesn’t have it so bad at home, but Sam’s flattering gaze gives her something she isn’t getting, and now won’t easily be able to live without. This utopian romance is thrown into relief by the quiet despair of the adults in Moonrise. Lonely, even—or particularly—when not alone, the grown-ups have long ago given up on the possibility of transformative love. (PG-13) Karina Longworth Big Picture Redmond, Guild 45th, Kirkland Parkplace, Lincoln Square, Pacific Place, Thornton Place PEOPLE LIKE US Alex Kurtzman and Roberto Orci (writers of Transformers and other summer blockbusters) wring a long, sappy melodrama out of Kurtzman’s real-life discovery of a half-sister. Sam (Chris Pine) is an indebted, fast-talking jerk of the Jerry Maguire template, estranged from his folks back in L.A. Father dies, Chris reluctantly flies west, and the lawyer hands him $150,000 in cash. Not to keep, but to deliver to an 11-year-old, the son of cocktail waitress Frankie (Elizabeth Banks), whom Chris begins to follow to AA meetings and beyond. He reveals

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nothing, choosing to remain a stalker/guardian angel while deciding whether to keep the cash or not. His withholding strategy parallels the movie’s, which waits until about the 95th minute (of 115) for him to spill. It’s a fouract soap opera that actually would’ve been improved with commercials. It’s like watching three James L. Brooks movies in row, maybe four. (R) Brian Miller Kirkland Parkplace, Lincoln Square, Pacific Place, SIFF Cinema Uptown, Thornton Place, Varsity PROMETHEUS Prone to shallow ponderousness, Prometheus assumes the air of a blockbuster-withbrains that links the genesis and the ultimate fate of mankind with a galactic quest for the mysterious beings archaeologist Elizabeth Shaw (Noomi Rapace) calls the “Engineers.” But it works best when it steps back from contemplating the cosmos to enter the domain of flesh-and-blood and hereditary terror. The script, by Jon Spaihts and Lost’s Damon Lindelof, originated as a prequel to Alien, director Ridley Scott’s first big hit. Rather than setting out, as Alien scriptwriter Dan O’Bannon first did, to build the ultimate creature feature, these gimcrack philosophers have loosely sown Prometheus with Big Themes in hopes that one might perchance take root. (R) Nick Pinkerton Lincoln Square, Meridian, Sundance Cinemas, Thornton Place SEEKING A FRIEND FOR THE END OF THE WORLD

What’s missing from this Steve Carell–vehicle misfire is the one element any apocalypse narrative suffocates without—urgency. Director Lorene Scafaria has created an end-times comedy that’s by turns bizarrely affectless and prattlingly manic, much like its protagonists, insurance salesman Dodge (Carell at his most downcast) and his perky neighbor Penny (a seriously unwound Keira Knightley), who light out together days before an asteroid is set to destroy the planet. Their goals: to track down his first love and a flight for Penny to the U.K. Reckonings and realizations fly once Seeking hits the road, and Scafaria eventually floats the notion that sticking to routine in the presence of overwhelming chaos is a way of giving life meaning. Seeking achieves the colorless tedium of a safe, dozy dream of catastrophe instead of anything like the real deal. (R) Mark Holcomb Lincoln Square, Sundance Cinemas

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TED Fans of Seth MacFarlane’s Family Guy week might be

pleased with Ted, the story of a 35-year-old man and his foul-talking teddy bear (the latter voiced by MacFarlane). Other specialized demographics—namely, anyone over 15 who can’t claim membership in either of the above groups—might sit in the theater in stony silence. Ted operates on the premise that audiences can’t resist having their baser instincts appealed to over and over again, especially when the filthy talk, gay panic, and racist jokes pour forth from as dissonant a figure as a stuffed animal. Ted has a soft, squishy ending, one meant to vindicate the girlfriend (Mila Kunis) who insists John grow up, even if the film has so little use for her—or any female who doesn’t want to spread her legs for Ted. (R) Melissa Anderson Big Picture, Kirkland Parkplace, Meridian, Sundance Cinemas WHERE DO WE GO NOW? If women were in charge, there’d be peace in the Middle East—or at least that’s what’s suggested by Where Do We Go Now?, the second film from Lebanese director and actress Nadine Labaki. Like her 2007 debut, Caramel, it’s driven by a deep faith in female friendship, though here the stakes are higher, and war lurks at the edges. The film follows the women of a remote village in Lebanon as they try to keep their menfolk from joining in the sectarian violence erupting around them by burning newspapers and sabotaging the only working television. When the refuge of blissful ignorance fails, they turn to other distractions, falsifying religious miracles and hiring a group of Russian strippers. The film’s flights of fancy (including a scattering of musical numbers) waver between actually charming and overly cute—and don’t meld with the undercurrent of anguish that sometimes erupts, including in a wrenching monologue from Labaki herself, breaking up a fight among her café customers by howling, “You think we’re here just to mourn you?” Like the hashish-laced pastries the ladies make to sedate the male population, the film feels like it has been dosed with sugar to mask its distressingly bitter taste. (PG-13) Alison Willmore Sundance Cinemas YOUR SISTER’S SISTER Seattle filmmaker Lynn Shelton’s fourth feature is another agreeable exercise in small-scale humanism, an intimate three-hander

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set mostly in a vacation home in the San Juans. Mark Duplass plays the an aging, grieving slacker Jack, who has an ill-advised, drunken fling with Hannah (Rosemarie DeWitt), the visiting sister of his good friend Iris (Emily Blunt), who arrives to find unexpected tensions in the cabin. In outline, Your Sister’s Sister could be a bed-hopping farce, but Shelton is less concerned with the sex than the emotional fallout. Hannah was recently dumped by her girlfriend. Jack’s dead brother once dated Iris, the high achiever in the bunch. Shelton’s characters tend to be yearning and groping toward change in their lives, and she lets her cast improvise on the three characters’ longing and confusion—resulting in meandering scenes without clever punch lines or clear end points. Feelings take priority over words; Your Sister’s Sister is talky and naturalistic, with many moments of humor and truth— the latter often eloquently expressed with silence. (R) Brian Miller Egyptian, Lincoln Square THEATERS: Admiral, 2343 California Ave. SW, 938-3456;

Big Picture, 2505 First Ave., 256-0566; Big Picture Redmond, 7411 166th Ave. NE, 425-556-0566; Central Cinema, 1411 21st Ave., 686-6684; Cinebarre, 6009 SW 244th St. (Mountlake Terrace)., 425-672-7501; Cinerama, 2100 Fourth Ave., 448-6680; Crest, 16505 Fifth Ave. NE, 781-5755; Egyptian, 801 E. Pine St., 781-5755; Grand Illusion, 1403 NE 50th St., 523-3935; Guild 45, 2115 N. 45th St., 781-5755; Harvard Exit, 807 E. Roy St., 7815755; iPic Theaters, 16451 N.E. 74th St. (Redmond), 425-636-5601; Kirkland Parkplace, 404 Park Place, 425-827-9000; Lincoln Square, 700 Bellevue Way N, 425-454-7400; Majestic Bay, 2044 NW Market St., 7812229; Meridian, 1501 Seventh Ave., 223-9600; Metro, 4500 Ninth Ave. NE, 781-5755; Northwest Film Forum, 1515 12th Ave., 267-5380; Oak Tree, 10006 Aurora Ave. N, 527-1748; Pacific Place, 600 Pine St., 888-262-4386; Seven Gables, 911 NE 50th St., 781-5755; SIFF Cinema Uptown, 511 Queen Anne Ave. N., 324-9996; SIFF Film Center, 305 Harrison St. (Seattle Center), 324-9996; Sundance Cinemas, 4500 Ninth Ave NE, 633-0059; Thornton Place, 301 NE 103rd St., 517-9953; Varsity, 4329 University Way NE, 781-5755.

food&drink»

Go to Heaven

Is Ezell’s fried chicken better than Ezell’s?

he question was deceptively straightforward, posed with no more melodrama than an optometrist musters when administering an eye exam. A or B? Whaddya like? Yet the guests at my improvised friedchicken faceoff looked stricken, realizing their answers might reveal not only where they stood on such important matters as saltiness and skin crispiness, but also hint at something telling about their base natures. If they sided with the drumsticks and breasts from Ezell’s Famous Chicken, the tasters could present themselves as loyalists and patriots, forever faithful to the brand that gave Seattle a speaking part in the nation’s high-cholesterol chicken pageant. But aligning themselves with the bird from Heaven Sent, the mini-chain that Ezell Stephens launched after a legal settlement shooed him from the restaurant bearing his name, would make them certifiable fans of the underdog— and, perhaps, discerning connoisseurs of chicken genius. Although the tasters weren’t told which restaurant produced which chicken, there was little risk of confusing the entries. With the exception of an eater who confessed he prefers his chicken dry and mildly seasoned, everyone was sold on Chicken B. They praised its thick, peppery skin and poked fun at its slouchy

The crisp skin acts as a bouncer, assertively warning eaters that if they’re turned off by the pop of cayenne, they might want to take their teeth elsewhere.

n the late 1970s, Stephens began wondering whether there was a market in Seattle for the kind of northernLouisiana chicken he’d learned to make as a teenaged fry cook at Brown’s Fried Chicken in Marshall, Texas. He pitched the idea to his childhood buddy and brother-inlaw, Lewis Rudd, who joined Stephens, Stephens’ then-wife Faye Rudd, and Stephens’ brother Sam in securing a Small Business Administration loan, which funded the opening of their store near Garfield High School.

Within a few years, the restaurant was prepping the in-flight lunches served to Seattle Seahawks before away games and selling close to 2,000 pieces of chicken a day. A chance craving for fried chicken led Winfrey to Ezell’s during a 1989 trip to Seattle. After having the chicken twice delivered to her hotel room, she raved about it on the air and arranged for 240 pieces to be served at her 36th birthday party in Chicago, alongside macaroni and cheese and sweetpotato cheesecake from Philadelphia. Yet back in Seattle, conditions were considerably less glamorous. Oprah’s endorsement helped slow Ezell’s slide into bankruptcy, but the restaurant’s books were a mess. Financial pressures, exacerbated by the restaurant’s Christian emphasis on charitable giving and a bungled expansion into the U District, contributed to the breakup of Stephens’ marriage and fostered serious management disagreements between Stephens and Rudd. Still, as late as 1993, the men vowed to weather the crisis together. “The two men, with tears in their eyes, hugged. Ezell whispered in Lewis’ ear, ‘We started it together, and we’ll finish it together,’ ” concluded a 4,000-word Seattle Times feature about the pair and the halfmillion dollars of debt they’d accumulated. The detente lasted until 1998, when an irreparable ownership and trademark dispute erupted. As reported by Seattle Weekly’s Rick Anderson (“Food Fight,” Feb. 9, 2011), Rudd accused Stephens of opening locations in Lynnwood and Lake City without board approval, and Stephens countered that Rudd had botched a plan to open Ezell’s in locations across the country. A lawsuit filed last year was settled out of court; though the terms weren’t publicly disclosed, Stephens says he’s allowed to fry chicken according to his recipe so long as he doesn’t use his name to sell it. Ezell’s was permitted to keep the recipe too.

arlier this year, Stephens opened They can take Stephens’ name, his fourth Heaven Sent outlet, but not his gift for frying. coyly tagged as the “same great chicken with a new name.” The Rainier Valley restaurant, his first in central she minutes later served halfway-warm Seattle, is housed inside Willie’s Taste of Soul, chicken that implied the fry guy was on in an arrangement that a biology teacher break. Time hadn’t been kind to the livers and could use to illustrate symbiosis. Stephens gizzards either. None of the food was greasy, and his pal Willie Turner, who five years ago but it was hardly touchdown-guaranteeing. moved his smoker down from Beacon Hill, Yet in its prime, Heaven Sent’s chicken haven’t merged operations—customers are is excellent. There are side dishes too— asked to declare whether they’ve come for including sugary baked beans, a mustardbarbecue or chicken before they place their enhanced potato salad of cream and lumps, orders so cashiers can position themselves a yeasty roll, and a shredded coleslaw that at the correct register—but they share the smacks of pickle juice—but there’s no shame kitchen and plainspoken dining room. in skipping them. Even Oprah “best I ever The tile-floored eating area, with walls had” Winfrey entrusted the fixings to another painted ketchup red and mustard yellow, is operation when she wrote her party menu. pleasant enough. It’s furnished with serviceStephens’ chicken is battered and then able tables and chairs, a flat-screen TV, a battered again. Its mahogany crust is thick cooler stocked with cold drinks, and a few and flat, and hovers above the meat like a gumball machines. But the majority of cusdark storm cloud. Here, the crisp skin acts tomers appear to take as a bouncer, assertively their fried chicken to go. warning eaters that if Bringing home a bucket they’re turned off by » PRICE GUIDE TWO-PIECE DINNER, DARK....... $6.65 is a grand American tradithe pop of cayenne, they TWO-PIECE DINNER, WHITE .....$7.60 tion, but if your commute might want to take their LIVERS .............................$6.50/POUND GIZZARDS.........................$6.75/POUND involves multiple highteeth elsewhere. But for ways or a bus transfer, it’s those who press on, the probably not the best way reward is tremendously to experience Heaven Sent. Fried chicken juicy meat penetrated by spice. Even the is fantastic straight from the fryer, and nearly white meat springs rivulets of juice. as good served cold the next day, but it’s an For chicken fans who moved to Seattle long enervated fright during its interim adolesafter Ezell’s founding, Heaven Sent’s chicken cence. It ages badly whether riding in a finally explains the baffling excitement about takeout bag or languishing behind the Ezell’s Famous Chicken. Stephens’ name may counter, which is why the luck of the clock belong to Ezell’s, but the man has retained matters at Heaven Sent. full ownership of his fried-chicken gift. E On my first visit, I was served chicken that hraskin@seattleweekly.com clearly hadn’t been fried recently. When I placed my order, the counter clerk scanned HEAVEN SENT the chicken selection under a heat lamp and 3427 Rainier Ave. S., 722-3229, asked whether I’d be willing to wait for a heavensentfriedchicken.com. 11 a.m.–8 p.m. fresh batch. Although I said I’d happily wait, Mon.–Thurs., 11 a.m.–9 p.m. Fri.–Sat.

Seattle w ee kly • July 4−10, 2012

competitor, which tasted as though it had had its last fling with freshness hours ago and was skunked with the flavor of dirty smoke. And when the chickens’ identities were unmasked, the tasters who were rooting for Stephens’ up-from-ignominy storyline were elated. Under the banner of Heaven Sent, the chicken that made Oprah go gaga is back.

JOSHUA HUSTON

BY HANNA RASKIN

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food&drink»Featured Eats $ = $25 or less per person; $$ = $25–$40; $$$ = $40 and up. These capsule reviews are written by editorial staff and have nothing to do with advertising. For hundreds more reviews, searchable by neighborhood and type of cuisine, go to seattleweekly.com/food.

BALLARD

CAFE BESALU 5909 24th Ave. N.W., 789-1463. Is there

a better quiche in Seattle than the ones at this holein-the-wall on a leafy street in Ballard? If you need incentives to drag yourself out of bed (and wait in line outside the door), you won’t find many better than this. Baker James Miller’s apple Danishes and pains au chocolat are good—and his croissants and brioches are outstanding. $

DANTE’S INFERNO DOGS

mobile, 283-3647. As far as biological imperatives go, acting on the need to feed oneself after a night of heavy drinking is the least likely to end in regret. That’s assuming you’ve chosen your post-last call meal wisely. In Ballard-that means Dante’s T H I S CO D E TO DOWNLOAD THE FREE Inferno Dogs. Problem is, SEATTLE WEEKLY everybody knows it, which IPHONE/ANDROID APP is why come 2 a.m. the wait FOR MORE RESTAURANTS OR VISIT to get a fix of dog, bun and seattleweekly.com toppings becomes nearly unbearable. So try your luck at one of this Ballard institution’s many carts at midday, even if you’ve no booze to soak up. $ FIREHOUSE COFFEE 2622 N.W. Market St., 784-2911. There’s a kids’ play gym next door (Gymboree) which can be handy or noisy, depending on your need or mood. But it’s a cozy coffeehouse atmosphere, with reliable sandwiches and tasty pastries. $ THE PEOPLE’S PUB 5429 Ballard Ave. N.W., 783-6521. The People’s Pub menu is like a love letter to Southern Germany, boasting a wide assortment of wursts and spaetzles. It will not disappoint with brews, either, which are served in a sampleable 10-ounce form. Spatens, Bitburgers, pils and others are all on tap. The star of the show, though, is the comfort food, especially the grilled cheese/tomato soup combo and the five lightly breaded dills with garlic aioli that, during happy hour, you can get for less than the price of a pint. In fact, People’s does a number of things surprisingly well, not the least of which is getting you tipsy on a budget. $

SCAN

SHIKU 5310 Ballard Ave. N.W., 588-2151. There are

neighborhoods that count dry cleaners and gas stations as necessary amenities. In Ballard, the list of musthaves includes a cozy sushi den, a niche neatly filled by Shiku. The brick-walled lounge is fond of embossing its menu and website with adjectives like “inventive” and “innovative,” but there’s nothing really mind-blowing here. The quasi-izakaya’s won fans with its pert cocktails and fairly-priced spicy tuna rolls, not its omakase. No matter: The fish is fresh, the vibe is homey and the restaurant saves Ballardites the trouble of straying too far from the ‘hood. $$

BELLTOWN

SPUR GASTROPUB 113 Blanchard St., 728-6706. The prob-

lem with so many of today’s flailing attempts at modernist cuisine and molecular gastronomy is that, in their breathless fascination with all the goop, gear, and gadgetry involved in turning cheese into pasta and fish into foam, many chefs forget that they’re still being paid to make people dinner. That means that the food itself still has to be a recognizable part of the “dining experience” and not get completely lost amid the chemicals and lasers. This, then, is the strength of Spur—a kitchen where a grounding in locality, seasonality, and recognizable ingredients (hedgehog mushrooms, salmon, potatoes, leeks, bacon) balances the impulse toward abstract gastronomic modernism, always elevating the trout above the almond foam and the sockeye salmon and house-made mascarpone above pure gimmickry. Because Spur’s crew can manage this (at prices considerably lower than those at many of the country’s other temples of molecular gastronomy), dinner here can be an event and an eye-opening indulgence without ever slipping over the line into a piece of egotistical performance art staged by cooks solely for their own enjoyment. $$$ TAVOLATA 2323 Second Ave., 838-8008. With its rawcement walls and ultralate hours, entrées for two and crowd of bargoers waiting for seats, Tavolata is the party place in party town. Those willing to dive in to the experience will find that Tavolata delivers much of what it promises: honest, well-prepared Italian food; a reasonable check; and good odds of chatting up whomever the host seats next to you at the 30-person communal table. Chef Ethan Stowell’s handmade pastas are supple and golden, soaking up flavor from the sauce but still leaving you something to chew on. The octopus salad is fantastic, as is his grilled fish, seasoned only with lemon and smoke, perfectly Italian in its minimalism. $$ TILIKUM PLACE CAFÉ 407 Cedar St., 282-4830. Tilikum Place is an unexpectedly successful hybrid between an

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bar is no coincidence.) The Drink: Given Roberts’ history, I shouldn’t have been surprised when he reaches for a tap instead of liquor. “I’ve been pouring beer since I was 15,” he says. “That’s half my life!” He selects New Belgium’s Tart Lychee. I ask if this is what he drinks after work. His response: “Right now, yes. It’s pretty rare, so you can’t get it just anywhere.” The Verdict: Other sours I’ve had have been overpowering, but the Lychee was smooth—yet just tart enough to keep things interesting. E kmckeon@seattleweekly.com

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Seattle w ee kly • July 4−10, 2012

KATHERINE MCKEON

The Watering Hole: The Pine Box, 1600 Melrose Ave., CAPITOL HILL The Atmosphere: Setting Catholic guilt aside, there’s something fantastically sneaky about drinking in a place that feels like a church. With its cathedral ceilings, tall stained-glass windows, and wide wooden booths, The Pine Box (formerly Chapel), opened a few months ago, is still an undiscovered neighborhood gem. Yet the venue gets its name not from a former cathedral of firs, but from another of society’s cobwebbed venues: a funeral home. Bright LCD screens, perfectly ironic considering the room’s deathly origins, announce the 33 taps’ various beers of the day, giving patrons new and interesting selections each time they visit. The Barkeep: Ian Roberts, 33. Bearded, tatted, and adorned with glasses and a skinny black V-neck, he looks the part of a beer-industry vet, and has the charm and rapport with the young bar’s regulars to prove it. As the former general manager of Fremont’s hop-geek heaven, Brouwer’s Cafe, Roberts obviously knows his brew. (The team behind Brouwer’s opened The Pine Box, of which Roberts is co-owner, so his presence behind the

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HOT MAMA’S PIZZA 700 E. Pine St., 322-6444. Too few

Seattleites have eaten Hot Mama’s when sober enough to give the Pine Street corner store its due. If there’s any pizzeria in town that delivers the pizza by the slice, it’s Hot Mama’s, where the thin-crust pies are only at the best when they’re reheated (something about the double-cooking gives the floury crusts an extra snap). They’re so good that no one minds the grease that drips onto their plates, covering the paper with orange dots. The late-night eavesdropping is priceless. $ ODDFELLOWS CAFE & BAR 1525 10th Ave., 325-0807. Oddfellows Cafe & Bar is a dining hall for the Capitol Hill of today. Decorated in washes of nostalgia-gray-blue walls, scuffed wood tables, salvaged signs and portraits—it’s Linda Derschang’s most beautiful space yet, where old-timey cocktails served in Grandma’s glassware look like they’ve always shared tablespace with MacBooks. During the day, the place operates as a counter-service cafe, and at night as a bar and restaurant. The food classes up basic American food without sparking class resentment. The simple mac and cheese looks circumspect yet has a surprising depth of flavor, and the crisp coating on the “pork nuggets” house a dense hunk of carnitas. For every plate of clams with chorizo the kitchen puts out, it assembles six BLTs and chicken-salad sandwiches. The braised pork shank and meatballs with pine nuts, currants, and polenta are popular, but the menu’s also seasonal (the spring menu has a plethora of arugula, asparagus, and green peas, for example). Drinks flow with abundance—the full bar offers a small wine selection, specialty cocktails, canned and bottled beer, and Manny’s Pale Ale and others on tap. $-$$ PLUM BISTRO 1429 12th Ave., 838-5333. Riding on the success of Hillside Quickies, where she’d been chef, Makini Howell launched this upscale all-vegan temple, and the powerful flavors have earned her a lovestruck following. The vegan approach here is less from the hippie tradition and more from the school of meat substitution, with a strong nod to Southern tradition: po’boys, collard greens, mac ‘n’ yease, fried okra. The tastes are intense and the textures equally so. $$

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and health-conscious eaters who fear fat—favor a long, lean pig. » by hanna raskin “We’ve bred the natural goodness out of pigs,” Jones says. “But there is a movement to bring quality pork back to blue-collar communities.” The current standard pig, typically referred to as Pitmaster Sam Jones, who’s cooked Auburn a “packer hog,” is so lean that it doesn’t produce (Wash.) farmer Heath Putnam’s Mangalitsa pigs at enough drippings for the Skylight Inn to use in its the last two “Memphis in May” contests as a collards; Jones says the cooks are forced to uisine member of the all-star Fatback Collective, supplement with lard. By comparison, a says a growing number of his colleagues Mangalitsa is so thick with flammable fat are lobbying pork producers to rethink that Jones nearly ignited an inferno when ski a decades-long effort to breed fat and he first tried to cook it. “First time I cooked flavor out of pigs. one, I was like, ‘It’s a pig, not a foreign math problem,’ ” Jones says, before he Jones, 31, manages the pits at the ts realized it was very nearly a different animal Skylight Inn, the famed Ayden, N.C., joint than the pigs he’d been trained to smoke. that his grandfather opened in 1947. Although he • whole 206hogs 789into5100 7 Ballard Avedaily NW Packer hogs make economic sense: Mangalitsa hoists the smoker, Putnam’s • www.volterrarestaurant.com rrarestaurant.com pigs cost $5 a pound, or nearly five times as much woolly heirloom pig was the first one with a threeas their industrial cousins. Still, Jones thinks there’s inch-deep outer layer of fat that Jones had ever a middle ground. His restaurant is now working encountered. with its pork supplier to secure a pig that’s “still “Right then, I was already having dreams of raised on concrete,” but with a different diet. what that pig was going to taste like,” Jones Flavor matters in eastern Carolina, Jones says, recalled in a panel discussion convened by the because the meat’s not obscured by sauce. “You Southern Foodways Alliance, which recently could eat a napkin if you put enough sauce on it,” hosted a three-day romp through Eastern Carolina says Jones, indulging in a subtle dig at his western barbecue country. “I had pictures on my phone, and I was like, ‘Check out this pig.’ ” neighbors. Yet he hasn’t yet found a hog with Older relatives who looked at the pictures flavors to rival the Mangalitsa. confirmed they hadn’t seen such fat pigs since “If it’s being served within 50 miles, get it,” he were Monday children. Bum-Dennis of Bum’s Ressays. “Break the law if you have to.” E uring Happythey Hour Friday 4:30-6:30pm hraskin@seattleweekly.com taurant in Ayden, who joined Jones on the panel, Michelle would also like to feature the "Best of" bug/logo remembered a time when hogs strung up by their in the ad from 2010. (They won Bestor Southern Italian last year.) feet in his freezer hovered a half-foot more above the floor. Now, he says, it’s common for BLOG ON FOOD nks! their snouts to graze the ground. That’s because VORACIOUS SEATTLEWEEKLY.COM/VORACIOUS pork producers who prioritize yield over quality—

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KaraoKeKorrespondent » by jeff roman

All for Juan

As most crooners are already aware, the old Andy’s Diner—the historic spot on Fourth Avenue South in SoDo made up of railroad cars—is now a Chinese restaurant with private karaoke rooms called Orient Express. I’ve been there a few times to drink after Seahawks games, and had one very boozy karaoke night with the Weekly staff at their holiday party a couple years back. But last Wednesday was my first chance to review the spot with a clear head. Or so I thought. I brought my buddy Juan because I couldn’t imagine anything lamer than singing alone in a private room. We arrived around 6 p.m. The plan was to eat dinner, get loose with a couple drinks, pop into a room for an hour to sing a few songs, and get out of there. That didn’t happen. We were there until almost midnight. You’d be hard-pressed to find a sweeter drinking atmosphere than that of Orient Express. I never got to see the bar when it was Andy’s, but the new owners have kept the original dark-wood interior pretty well preserved. And the famous “presidential” car FDR once rode in is still on display. We spent a lot of time bellied up watching summer reruns on channel 4, listening to awesome, random R&B someone had fired up on the jukebox, and chatting with the bartender, Carrie. We finally got around to renting the karaoke room at about 9 p.m. It’s a great deal—just a $15-minimum food or drink order per person. Had we understood that going in, we would have rented the room before having spent $30 each on gin, whiskey, and Hornitos shots. They set us up in the Hong Kong room (all the suites are named after a different international city). It’s sleekly furnished with comfortable black high-back

couches that wrap around three walls and can easily seat 15 people. On the wall hung a 55-inch LCD for the lyrics, and below that on a table was a small monitor that provided the song menu. The karaoke receiver was straight from China, and contained around 2,200 songs. It took a little time to figure out how to search the selections, but eventually we mastered the remote-control functions. Half the selections were newer pop hits, and the rest were a mix from every other genre. I wondered if it would be weird with just Juan and me, but we were so fueled-up for singing that it was great not to have to wait longer than one person to get up next. We easily sang a dozen songs each. Juan discovered he could do a pretty mean rendition of the Queen classic “Another One Bites the Dust.” And I was happy to learn my voice has finally matured to the point that I can deliver a truly quality performance of “Lady in Red” by Chris DeBurgh. One thing about this system completely dumbfounded me. All the newest selections from artists like Jay-Z, Lady Gaga, and Katy Perry used their actual music videos. The crazy thing was this button on the remote that added vocals, and I realized it wasn’t a reproduction of the song but the actual artists singing. I went to sleep that night tripping out, thinking the Chinese had actually figured out how to eliminate vocals from studio-produced songs, but realized the next morning that was still completely impossible and they probably just had the original mixes without the artist’s vocal track. For a moment there I felt what it was like to believe in Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy again. E karaoke@seattleweekly.com ORIENT EXPRESS 2963 Fourth Ave. S., 682-0683, SODO

column»Toke Signals

In the Key of Seed

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The collective—located across the street from a saloon, but with a much calmer clientele—can stand toe-to-toe with any of its urban counterparts. Helpful budtender Sam was very knowledgeable about the medicinal qualities of all Key Peninsula’s strains and products, and took down several different jars of flowers as I narrowed my selections to three: Honeybee, a sativa-dominant strain, and the indica-dominants Citral, bred from Hindu Kush, and Razzleberry, created from Raspberry and Purple Kush. Honeybee is a mostly sativa hybrid created by famed cannabis breeder DJ Short. It

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dategirl»By Judy McGuire What’s in a Number? Dear Dategirl, My boyfriend married young, stayed married for a long time, and then met me after he’d been divorced for about five minutes. We’re both 40. Meanwhile, I’ve spent most of my life single. I’ve had relationships here and there, but nothing more than a few years. As a result, I’ve slept with many more people than he has. I foolishly answered honestly when he asked me how many people I’d had sex with. I now regret this disclosure, but at the time we’d just started dating and my guard was down. At least I never told him about the women on my list! We actually broke up over this—and a few other things—and he had slept with at least one other person in the interim. But he’s back to harping on “my number” whenever we have a fight. I know other people have had this problem, but I’ve never seen it answered competently. What do I do? He’s otherwise great. I can’t believe this is an issue. —Not a SLUT!

I get asked this question every few years, but so far, nobody’s invented a time machine that allows you to go back a few decades and unfuck all those peeps, so your man is out of luck. That hymen has sailed, whore. But really, why would you want to do that anyway? Sure, there are a few penises I’ve experienced that I’d like to forget, but I like to think that every scrotum I’ve cupped and foreskin I’ve lovingly peeled back has helped form the lovely woman you see today. It sounds like you feel much the same way, which is good, because if you were feeling guilty, we’d need to have words. Unfortunately, technology has also come up short by not inventing a security blanket to wrap around your boyfriend and make him less of a insecure tool. I’m sorry if that sounds harsh. I’m sure he has his charms, but this harping over

numbers is less flattering than a fanny pack. The reason you’ve never seen this retardo dilemma answered competently is that the people who usually ask about it are generally the half of the equation being yelled at, not the half doing the yelling. That’s because someone who is furious about ancient history knows they’re being a douchebag. So why would they ask anyone to confirm their douchebaggery? I guess what I’m saying is that unless your boyfriend admits he has a problem, he’s always going to make it yours. If he’s that much of a keeper (insert skeptical expression here), try couples counseling. Maybe having a mental-health professional tell him he’s mental will help him get a grip. Dear Dategirl, My mother stopped wearing a bra. She just announced it one day, and refuses to listen to reason. Now her giant, dangling mom boobs are just out there, sliding around underneath her T-shirts. I refuse to be seen with her. What can I say to get her back into her bra? —Son of a Boob

When I came home from college with a mohawk, my mother threw a fit of shit. She cried, she screamed, and she told me she wouldn’t be seen in public with me until my hair grew back. Did her histrionics persuade me to grow out my ’hawk? Nope. Because my hair (and it looked really cute) was my business. Just as your mom’s tits are her biz, not yours. So back off, little boy. Lighten up and quit staring at your mom’s chest. That’s creepy. E dategirl@seattleweekly.com WANT MORE? Listen to Judy on The Mike & Judy Show on the Heritage Radio Network, follow her tweets @DailyDategirl, visit dategirl.net, or buy her new book, The Official Book of Sex, Drugs and Rock ’n’ Roll Lists.

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