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DECEMBER 19–25, 2012 I VOLUME 37 I NUMBER 51

R A 5 OF 5 R ST I NA T O

RICK ANDERSON THROWS GAS ON MARTIN PANG’S DEADLY FIRE

ALSO

REVERB MONTHLY THE YEAR IN MUSIC

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QUENTIN TARANTINO on making django unchained page 13

holiday film guide plus: We review all the big movies, from Jack Reacher to Les Mis

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inside» December 19–25, 2012 VOLUME 37 | NUMBER 51 » SEATTLEWEEKLY.COM

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»REVERB MONTHLY

up front 6 9

NEWS

THE DAILY WEEKLY | Norm Stamper suggests I-502 could’ve gone further. Also: bad news about tobacco and minors.

FEATURE

BY RICK ANDERSON | Martin Pang’s

lawyer thinks “new evidence” could help free the convicted killer. But in reality, it paints an even more sinister portrait of the man behind an infamous 1995 arson that killed four Seattle firefighters.

13 FILM

23 THE WEEKLY WIRE James Stewart saves Christmas, Nanda goes ninja, and the Seahawks face the 49ers.

35 FOOD

35 | STARBUCKS | A report on their first

foray into a lucrative new market: India. 37 | FIRST CALL | Winter comfort. 39 | A LITTLE RASKIN | A White Center butcher returns.

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in back

»35

HOLIDAY FILM GUIDE

Quentin Tarantino talks about Django Unchained, which we review along with all the big new movies, featuring Tom Cruise, Barbra Streisand, and the entire Apatow clan.

reverb monthly

This month we count down 2012’s top albums, check in with Carrie Brownstein, and reflect on Father John Misty and Macklemore. Todd Hamm shares his diary of a year of KEXP listening, while Andrew Gospe says we should spend more time with music and less with music memes. (Also, don’t miss our online recap of 12 months of CD reviews.) Find it all in Reverb Monthly’s Year-End Special, following page 22.

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Norm Stamper now opposes certain I-502 restrictions, and other states are taking note.

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eattle police chief and potlegalization advocate Norm Stamper was an enthusiastic According to the Washington State supporter of Initiative 502. He Department of Health, the number of did countless interviews and wrote letters retailers illegally selling tobacco to kids to the editor. “I hope you’ll join me in vothas risen to its highest mark in more than ing YES on Initiative 502,” he urged in one. a decade—roughly 16 percent in 2012. A month after the election, however, he This figure, calculated yearly, is based on tells SW that he’s had a revelation. random compliance checks carried out by “I now question whether Washington local health agencies and the state Liquor state’s initiative needed to be as restrictive Control Board from January to June. as it is,” he says. In particular, he regrets What’s the deal? the law’s controversial DUI provisions, and At least in part, think of it as just also takes issue with its failure to allow one more crappy side effect of a strughome grows. Why is he bringing up these gling economy. Washington State Health provisions now? Department Office of Communications Well, before the election, 502 campaignManager Tim Church says that roughly ers said that such restrictions were neces600 compliance checks were conducted sary to get a legalization initiative approved in the first half of 2012. The finding of 16 by the general public—drawing upon lespercent represents a significant jump—up sons learned from California’s failed initiafrom 11 percent in 2011 and 10 percent in tive, Proposition 19, especially in regards to 2010, according to state Health Departthe DUI provision. As 502 campaign direcment numbers. tor Alison Holcomb told SW, post-election “This is unacceptable. Our young surveys indicated that California voters people should not have access to these were worried about stoned drivers. deadly tobacco products,” said Secretary But Colorado’s successful legalization of Health Mary Selecky in a press release measure, Amendment 64, didn’t have distributed last Wednesday. any DUI provision. It also allows limited Church is quick to note that complihome grows (six plants, to be exact). And ance rates tend to fluctuate each year, yet, Stamper points out, that amendment and the latest figures may represent an passed by a “very, very healthy” margin, anomaly rather than a trend. But he says with 55 percent of voters giving it the the spike—which probably has many conthumbs-up—almost the same margin as tributing factors—is almost certainly conWashington’s more restrictive initiative. nected to the faltering economy. Not only NORML legal are pinched retailers director Keith more willing to risk Stroup said the fines if it means PRINT IS GREAT, but if you want results in Washingmaking an extra a road map to stricter gun laws, go to The ton and Colorado buck, but the money Daily Weekly. “open up the posWashington funnels SEATTLEWEEKLY.COM/DAILYWEEKLY sibility that issues toward tobacco prelike DUID [driving vention and educaunder the influence of drugs] and home tion programs has all but dried up since cultivation may not be as important as we the economic crapfest of 2008: The Health initially thought.” Department has had to ax its retailer According to Marijuana Policy Project tobacco-education efforts, and the spokesperson Mason Tvert, legislators in department’s school-based anti-tobacco at least five states—Maine, Rhode Island, education programs have also lost Vermont, Massachusetts, and New Hampfunding. shire—have indicated an intent to submit Church says that in the boom times marijuana regulation and taxation bills for the state’s anti-tobacco efforts, Washin the 2013 session. The successful ballot ington spent $26.5 million on efforts to measures in Washington and Colorado reduce tobacco use. Since 2008–2009, have “emboldened legislators,” observes however, Church says that funding has Tvert, who said he also expects another been cut “little by little” to next to nothballot measure to be put forth in Oregon. ing. These days, he says, Washington In Washington, meanwhile, Stamper scrapes its pockets for about $1 million says he expects 502’s controversial proviin anti-tobacco spending, all of it going sions to be changed by either the courts toward the Department of Health’s newly or the legislature. Rep. Roger Goodman reinstated tobacco quit line. And even this (D-Kirkland) has already told SW he would spending is authorized only through the like to hold hearings on the DUI provision. end of the year: “Literally all of that money As Stamper points out, however, the leghas been cut now,” Church said. islature can’t mess with an initiative for two MATT DRISCOLL E years. NINA SHAPIRO news@seattleweekly.com

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Martin Pang’s “new evidence” only serves to throw gas on a deadly fire.

Burning Man Pang pled guilty to manslaughter in 1998.

JIMI LOTT KRT/NEWSCOM

y all accounts, including his own, Martin Pang set the tragic January 5, 1995 Chinatown blaze that killed four Seattle firefighters. “I struck a match and set it to a bottom corner of plywood wall” inside the basement of his parents’ frozen-foods warehouse, he stated in a signed, four-page confession written by his own hand in a Rio de Janeiro jail three months after the fatal blaze. “I observed the wall burn until the flames burned up the wall approximately two feet in height,” Pang added. “I then fled the building.” The warehouse’s collapsing upper floor turned into a death trap for Seattle firefighters James Brown, 25, Randy Terlicker, 35, Greg Shoemaker, 43, and Lt. Walt Kilgore, 45, wreathing Seattle’s 1995 New Year in a black cloud of smoke and sorrow. But today Pang, serving a 35-year prison term in the Twin Rivers Unit of the Monroe Correctional Complex, claims that confession was coerced and

untrue. Though he wrote that his statement was given “freely and voluntarily,” he now insists it wasn’t. In fact, claims Jeffrey Ellis, his Portlandbased attorney, Pang was nowhere near Seattle the day of the fire. Ellis says he has “new evidence that undermines the case against Mr. Pang,” showing he was in California at the time. That “new evidence” has actually been around since the 1990s, and consists of documents compiled by police and prosecutors but not revealed until now. They were recently obtained by Seattle Weekly, and do indeed reflect investigators’ beliefs that Pang was in Los Angeles when the blaze erupted that icy January night. The documents also reveal a background portrait of Pang not previously exposed: While he was known to be a wife-abuser, he had also plotted the murders of members of his family, hoping to collect insurance payoffs to finance his playboy lifestyle. That was also his motive for setting the

warehouse on fire, according to the files. Included among the documents are previously unreleased police reports and interviews, along with a memorandum sent from the King County Prosecutor’s Office to a Special Inquiry Judge. The judge was reviewing evidence in a closed court and signing search warrants as the initial Pang investigation was unfurled in legal secrecy. Attorney Ellis thinks the evidence could lead to a new trial for the 57-year-old Pang, responsible for the biggest single loss of firefighters in Seattle history. In a 1998 deal with prosecutors, who were barred by a Brazilian extradition agreement from seeking the death penalty, Pang pled guilty to four counts of manslaughter to avoid a life sentence. Since he never went to trial, many of the documents in the historic case were not publicly filed in court or released. They had been handed over to Pang’s original attorney,

Seat tle weekly • DECEM BER 19−25, 2012

BY RICK ANDERSON • illustration by justin renteria

» CONTINUED ON PAGE 10 9

Burning Man » FROM PAGE 9

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John Henry Browne, in the late 1990s, but were privately filed away after the plea bargain, says Ian Goodhew, deputy chief of staff to county prosecutor Dan Satterberg. Hired by Pang two years ago to review his case for possible errors, Ellis filed a motion in King County Superior Court last month, bringing the old case back to life. He wants the prosecutor to turn over additional documents that could, he suspects, show his client didn’t set the fire and is not guilty. Ellis calls his effort “a continued search for the truth.” But the new documents add to the search for the truth about the real Martin Pang as well. During the decade prior to the fateful night he became a lethal arsonist, Martin Pang had allegedly planned to kill his wife and parents.

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t didn’t take much to set Martin off,” ex-wife Rise Pang told federal agents the day after the fire. “You could disagree with him about the color of a suit and it would make him angry.” Her conversation is recalled in the justreleased documents, in which she and other sources describe Pang as armed and dangerous. They remember him as a heavy drinker and manipulative schemer who, even while confessing to the fire, inserted a self-serving claim into his statement: He burned down the business “to relieve my parents of the burden of running it.” In reality, according to the sources and investigators, Pang prayed that Harry and Mary Pang, then in their 70s, would die so he could cash in on their estate, just as he hoped to earn a chunk of the reported $1 million fireinsurance policy by torching their warehouse. Pang’s California girlfriend, Pam Pendleton, told ATF investigators that Pang’s parents made his house, child support, and car payments. Nonetheless, Pang told Pendleton, “He couldn’t wait for his parents to die so he could take over the business because his parents didn’t know what they were doing,” she said. Pang also mentioned that he planned to hire someone to cause “an accident” at the business so he could collect the insurance money. The portrait of Martin Pang in these documents broadens the image that emerged in news stories after the fire. Wiry, stylish, and devilishly handsome, the bar-hopping womanizer was reported to have a penchant for speedboats, Porsches, and exotic vacations, thanks to a generous allowance that Pang’s parents extended to their adopted son. He had an abusive, quirky side as well. As The Seattle Times reported in 1995, “Exgirlfriends and ex-wives, of whom there are many, say Pang fancied himself as something of a secret agent, with night-vision goggles, wall-climbing suction cups, and a telephone scrambler to go with his skill at fast talking, fast driving, and martial arts.” The story also noted that he “broke one ex-wife’s back with a kung-fu kick [and] shattered the jaw of another.” And that wasn’t half of it. In Rise Pang’s Jan. 6, 1995 interview with three ATF agents (she had also met with the ATF in December prior to the fire, to tip them off to the arson plan), Rise said her ex “used to beat me, threaten me with firearms.” Rise— who married Martin in August 1985 and split

from him 11 months later—also recalled him kicking her in the stomach while she was pregnant, endangering the life of her baby. According to an interview transcript, she was hospitalized and required 10 stitches to close a gash on her head after one of his beatings. She was the third of his four wives, she said, and he treated them all similarly. He could flip out in a blink, Rise recalled, citing the time he’d put his arm around her and said he loved her—and then, minutes later, after disagreeing with her about some matter, menacingly told her, “I could kill you and nobody would ever find out about it.” That actually became his plan, Rise said, after they were divorced in 1986. She told the ATF agents she’d been alerted by two of Pang’s friends that he had approached each of them about murdering her. He wanted them to do the job, or at least help him pull it off. Apparently word leaked back to Pang that she knew of the threat, and he then stayed clear of her. He also talked about killing his wealthy parents, Rise recalled in the interview. They had grown their little start-up frozen-food operation into a million-dollar business, doling out much of the profit to help nurture Martin, born Sun Hing Wah in Hong Kong in 1955 and adopted by the Pangs when he was 6 months old. “He talked about finding a way of having them die together because of some double-indemnity clause in their insurance,” Rise said (now living in Canada, she could not be reached for comment for this story). “They were worth more if they died together . . . he discussed maybe having their car blow up.” Nothing came of the plan, she said, “but he did talk about it on several occasions.” It concerned her enough that she later told Mary Pang about it. “All she said about it was ‘I believe it,’ and that . . . was the last we spoke about it.” Martin Pang also contacted his parents’ attorney in an attempt to read their will and determine what his split might be should they die. Mary told Rise she later quietly showed Martin the will, fearful that he’d get angry if she refused. Harry Pang’s health began to fail following the arson, and he died at 83 in 2004. “He was heartbroken,” his brother Ted Pang told a reporter then. Mary Pang, sister of the late restaurateur and King County Council member Ruby Chow, died at 87 in 2009. “I often wonder what might have happened if the fire hadn’t happened,” Kristin Pang, Rise and Martin’s daughter, said then. “They loved that business, and I wonder how it would have gone, because she was such an amazing woman.”

artin Pang began to chat up the idea of burning down the warehouse in 1994, and it didn’t stay quiet for long. The now-released records show he left a huge crumb trail for investigators, revealing his arson plan to at least four people he considered closed-mouthed friends or family. One was a state trooper, Cleave Odegard, who reported the scheme to superiors and then to Seattle authorities. Rise Pang, who became a vice president and continued to work for the family after her divorce, told the ATF that Martin first revealed his plan in October 1994 while they talked at a Pang warehouse office. He “asked me if I had anything of value down there [in the basement] that I didn’t want to lose, and I told him I didn’t think so. And that if I did, I

Agent: Why? Rise Pang: Because he wanted to burn the

building down.

Martin, who by then had moved to California, told her he would have someone else torch the business for him, entering through an easily accessible rear door and using Molotov cocktails as a starter. He picked that entry site because it was the one door that wasn’t alarmed, Rise said. “If an alarm went off early, he was concerned the fire department would be able to extinguish the fire.” Rise Pang originally informed the ATF of Martin’s plan in December. That tip, and at least one more, from an insurance agent who’d caught wind of the plan, were passed on to the SFD’s Fire Investigation Unit (FIU). The unit undertook surveillance of the warehouse between December 16 and 18, the rumored dates Pang was supposed to act, yet didn’t. After that, the basement-arson threat case remained open, but secret. The fire had been burning in the basement for at least 20 minutes when the first SFD units rushed to the food warehouse at Seventh Avenue South and South Dearborn Street on January 5. It was just after 7 p.m. on that bonechilling evening in Seattle’s Chinatown/International District. Firefighters broke through the upper doors into an acrid, smoke-filled darkness, and began chasing the flames. Eventually a total of five alarms were called, and more than 100 firefighters flooded the scene. Unlike pre-fire planning at SFD today, the Pang fire crews arrived without a building plan of the layout and without the knowledge the FIU could have provided to them—and thus didn’t know there was a basement and that the fire could have been set there. Crews battled the blaze for almost a halfhour, assuming the building was a street-level structure, when the floor gave way. Some firefighters, though injured, scrambled to safety. Four dropped into the 1,400-degree fire 20 feet below. It was three days before their bodies could be retrieved. Rise told the ATF agents she got a call that night from Martin in California.

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Martin then recovered, and began telling Rise a new story. He had decided not to burn down the warehouse. He had nothing to do with the deadly fire. “He said that it was coincidental that the building was burning,” she recalled. After her January post-fire session with the ATF, Rise agreed to wear a wire to two meetings with her ex. He was still wary, as Rise recorded him saying a transient must have set the blaze. But be cautious what you say, he told his ex. “We have to keep our stories straight.” Odegard, the trooper, also wore a wire to post-fire meetings with Pang, who arrived at one of them wearing a wig, hat, and fake mustache. He told his longtime confidant Odegard that “nobody was supposed to get hurt, the building was supposed to just burn down.” He was thinking of fleeing to another country, Pang added.

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Rise Pang: I informed him of the firemen that were missing, and he seemed surprised. Agent: What did he say? Rise Pang: He just kind of went “What?”

s the now-extended public record and his confession show, Pang, then 39, set the fire himself. He hopped a jet from Burbank that day, spread flammable fluids and ignited the basement fire, then flew back to L.A. With investigators immediately on his trail, he subsequently slipped off to Mexico, then Brazil, where he thought he had the best chance of fighting extradition. Pang sent Seattle TV stations a video proclaiming his innocence, saying “I had nothing to do with it [the fire] except joking about it . . . I love my family. I love my children. I’m a good person.” After a legal struggle, he signed the confession and agreed to return, eventually bargaining a guilty plea down to four counts of first-degree manslaughter. At his sentencing, Karen Shoemaker, the widow of Lt. Gregory Shoemaker, told him, “Martin Pang, you ripped my heart out from me that awful night.” The city subsequently paid nearly $12 million in claims, fines, and court rulings for the department’s firefighting failures. During one trial, a jury assigned 75 percent of the blame for the firefighters’ death to the department and 25 percent to Pang. Pang’s attorney Ellis today contends that Pang deserves none of the blame. In court papers, he argues that “the truth does not have an expiration date,” and is seeking more of the original documents in the hope of showing that Pang was not in Seattle when the fire was set. Indeed, Goodhew, the prosecutor’s deputy chief of staff, tells Seattle Weekly that investigators did think someone else may have started the fire. But they later discovered otherwise, through airline records. “Pang was living in L.A. at the time of the fire in January 1995,” Goodhew says. “So the investigators’ initial theory was he was in California, because his roommate told police that he saw Pang on the day of the fire in his L.A. apartment.” Investigators then realized Pang was seen early in the morning, but then not again until 10 p.m., when he started calling friends in Seattle. “So our initial theory started to change,” says Goodhew. They soon discovered solid evidence that Pang flew up and lit the fire himself. “That is exactly what he later admitted to in his confession,” adds Goodhew, “a confession that [trial attorney] John Henry Browne was never able to convince the court was coerced. I can’t emphasize enough the fact that we provided copies of the Inquiry Judge’s memos to Pang’s defense team as part of discovery back in the 1990s. This release, along with the underlying witness statements that we also gave his defense team in the 1990s that explain why we initially thought he was in California at the time of the fire, really defeats the theory Ellis presents.” Yet, even if Pang’s new legal challenge falls short, he has another early escape route from prison. Having bargained a life sentence down to 35 years, he now could be free after just 20. “As of today,” says Nora West, a state Department of Corrections spokeswoman, “his release date is November 4, 2018”—made possible by Pang’s accrual of time off for good behavior. Unlike his years in society, he’s kept his record clean in prison, where there are no women or elderly parents to abuse. “So far,” says West, “he’s infraction-free.”

W W W . U LY S S E - N A R D I N . C O M

should make sure I get it out within the next couple or three weeks.”

Seattle weekly • DECEM BER 19−25, 2012

holiday film guide ❄

Tarantino, Alone

Now a prosperous Hollywood insider, Quentin Tarantino tells of his struggle to make Django Unchained. Tarantino recently told Playboy. “I think I’m a pretty good member of this community, both as a person and as far as my job and contributions are concerned.” Choosing the DGA’s theater for the first screening of his highly anticipated new film is a sign that Tarantino, the boy wonder who made his name via ostensibly alternative venues like Sundance and Cannes, is eager for the embrace of that community. But Tarantino still does things his way. “You have to admit,” I say, “there’s something unusual about doing an interview with someone like me before they’ve seen the movie.” “I don’t think it’s so weird,” Tarantino protests. “I mean, unless you were supposed to review the movie to me. We don’t have to talk about the movie—talk about me.”

people excited when they read the script,” he says. “And to keep me excited—‘Oh, hey, this is a good idea.’ ” He saw the character of Django as an “über-masculine black male figure of folklore,” kind of a black Paul Bunyan or Pecos Bill, whose adventures would have been disseminated (and exaggerated) through “spoken history passed down by slaves, about this one guy, throughout the course of time.” The film is a superhero origin story, explaining how a chain-gang slave becomes a free man legally employed to “kill white people and get paid for it”; grows into the “fastest gun in the South”; rescues his wife from bondage; and ultimately evolves into a kind of angel of vengeance, wiping out anyone and everyone— white, black, male, female—who endorses, enforces, enables, and/or is economically enriched by the institution of slavery. Tarantino says his initial impulse was to get that transformation out of the way at the beginning of the film, and then “cut to years later, like way after the Civil War.” But he liked Django’s origin story—and he also liked the idea of breaking from the “mosaic” storytelling style he’s associated with, thanks to the out-of-order chapter structures of movies like Pulp Fiction and Basterds. “I’ve done that,” he says. With Django, he became excited about “investing in a through character, who actually goes through one situation from beginning to end, and follow it and not do my normal tricks of having a separate chapter that takes you somewhere else entirely. I didn’t want that in this one. It’s really Django’s story, from beginning to end.” Armed with that first scene and the bounty of spaghetti-Western soundtracks he bought in Japan, Tarantino returned to Los Angeles. He used to write in restaurants, bars, Amsterdam coffeehouses—always in public, and anywhere but home. “As time goes on,” he says, his process has become more “professional.” Django was written mostly on the balcony off the bedroom of his Hollywood Hills mansion. “I have a little speaker out there, so I can make tapes and play them. So I get up, around 10 or 11 I mosey out there, and I start writing the next scene.” He puts in a full workday— six, eight hours. Then at night, “I’ll get in the pool and I’ll swim around and think about

Tarantino also plays a small, funny role late in Django.

what I’ve done. If I know I’m really not done with a scene, I think, ‘OK, what do I want to do, how can I make it better?’ If I am done with it, then I’m in the pool doing the same thing: ‘What next? What happens next?’ “And I’ve got to tell you, it’s as close to bliss as I’ve ever achieved, in that space, doing that.”

arantino was in that space, doing that, until April 26, 2011—the precise date the script was finished. Shooting began the last week of November 2011 and wrapped July 24, 2012. (That these dates are all included in the film’s official press notes suggests that the breakneck schedule is being posited as something of a selling point.) Was Django’s schedule unusually compressed? “It was, for sure,” Tarantino acknowledges. “[But] I’ve been heading here for a long time. My post [-production] schedules just keep getting shorter and shorter and shorter and shorter, because there’s always something I’m making it for, some event. Like for Inglourious Basterds, it was finishing it in time for the Cannes Film Festival . . . It just kept going in that direction—and we kept rising to the occasion. In this case, it wasn’t supposed to be this short, I just went really long on shooting. Went a little over.” Ultimately, Tarantino says he had to negotiate with The Weinstein Company in order to get the three extra weeks he needed to shoot a final sequence. In exchange, Tarantino agreed to forgo a chunk of his profit participation. “If the movie does really well, I’ll do really, really, really, really, really well,” he says. But, “I don’t kick in for a while. I have to pay back the extra money I spent before my thing kicks in.” The four-month post-production period on Django was further complicated by the fact that, for the first time, Tarantino was finishing a movie without Sally Menke, who’d edited each of his previous features. By all accounts, Tarantino and Menke had a symbiotic relationship similar to that between Martin Scorsese and his longtime editor, Thelma Schoonmaker. Taran-

Seat tle weekly • DECEM BER 19−25, 2012

ack in 2009, Inglourious Basterds— a two-and-a-half-hour revisionist World War II epic in multiple languages, with subtitles—grossed $120 million domestically. It also stood toeto-toe with Avatar and The Hurt Locker on Oscar night, netting nominations for Tarantino as writer and director and a Best Supporting Actor win for Christoph Waltz. The final stop of the Basterds promo tour brought Tarantino to Japan, where violent, mid-century Italian “spaghetti” Westerns have recently had a resurgence. On his day off, Tarantino went to a record store and found a “treasure trove” of reissues of spaghetti Westerns and their soundtracks. “I’d been thinking about spaghetti Westerns anyway,” Tarantino says today, “because between movies I’ve been working on a book about Sergio Corbucci.” Tarantino has long written what he calls “subtextual film criticism” between making films, as both a hobby and as a kind of DIY film tutorial. Originally a film critic himself, Corbucci directed a number of spaghetti Westerns in the 1960s, most notably the ultraviolent Django (1966), starring Franco Nero as the titular drifter seeking to avenge the death of his wife. In Japan, under “the whole influence of playing the music and having been writing my Corbucci book,” Tarantino says, he wrote the first scene of Django Unchained. Two white slave traders are dragging a chain gang of five slaves through Texas woods on a frigid night. Out of the darkness appears Dr. King Schultz (Christoph Waltz), a German bounty hunter billing himself as a dentist. He announces his intention to acquire one of the bonded men, Django (Jamie Foxx). There is conversation, gunfire, blood, and, ultimately, liberation. Essentially, it’s the movie in microcosm. Because Tarantino tends to write his scripts linearly, starting at the beginning of the film and finishing with the end, opening scenes are an important part of the process. “I usually want my first scenes to be pretty good, if for no reason other than to keep

ANDREW COOPER, SMPSP/WEINSTEIN CO.

uentin Tarantino has been Googling himself, and it’s starting to become a problem. The filmmaker is famously an analog evangelist: He writes his scripts in longhand; he bans cell phones from his sets and hasn’t had one of his own in years; he has claimed that the day the film industry “evolves” to the point where it will be impossible for him to shoot on celluloid will be the day he retires. “But I do have an iPad, and I have a lot of fun with it,” Tarantino tells me. It’s a rainy afternoon in late November, and the 49-yearold former video-store clerk is sequestered in the bar at the Four Seasons Hotel in Beverly Hills, nursing a healthy pour of pinot noir. “But because of that, I found myself Googling Django Unchained, seeing what people are saying, the articles that are out there, and that’s been kind of fun for a while, but now I’ve got to get out of it. It’s hard to not want to do that when you have easy access to that kind of shit. And I’ve never really had that before, so I’m gonna actually have to get rid of my iPad for a while.” By the time you read this, Django Unchained will have been screened widely for industry members and critics. (See our review by Scott Foundas, page 14.) Some will have suggested that Tarantino’s latest confection could have used more time in the oven, while others name it one of the year’s best films. But at the time of our interview, almost anything anyone’s saying online about Django is almost certainly speculative. Aside from Tarantino’s collaborators and confidants, no one has actually seen the movie— me included. There are few filmmakers I would agree to interview for a cover story without actually having seen their movie first; this year, the list starts and ends with Quentin Tarantino. Among all that Googling, I wonder, is there anything he’s read that’s totally inaccurate? “They’ve been saying that me and [editor] Fred [Raskin] have been editing up until the last second,” Tarantino says, without hesitation. “And we locked our cut two weeks ago.” So why not let me see it before our interview? “I don’t want anyone to see it now, until the mix is finished,” he says, adding, “People can see it when I’m fucking done. I’m getting done with it real quick. They can wait a couple days.” And, besides, “It would actually spoil Saturday if anyone had seen it.” Two days after our sit-down at the Four Seasons, Django Unchained will be unveiled to its first audience, at the Directors Guild of America in Hollywood. “It’s almost like a Cannes Film Festival screening, the DGA thing,” Tarantino says. But the Directors Guild unveiling has a symbolism that a Cannes premiere wouldn’t: In 2012, 20 years after Reservoir Dogs debuted at Sundance and established Tarantino as the rebel filmmaker of his time, he finally became a dues-paying member of the Guild—a Hollywood institution he famously resisted joining for the first two decades of his career. “I’m not a Hollywood outsider anymore,”

BY KARINA LONGWORTH

» CONTINUED ON PAGE 14 13

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tino has called Menke “my only true, gen-u-ine collaborator,” likening her contribution in the editing room to that of a co-writer. On a sweltering day in September 2010, Menke went on a hike with her dog in Griffith Park, and never returned; her body was found the next day at the foot of a Beachwood Canyon ravine. (No official cause of death has been reported.) “It’s sad,” Tarantino acknowledges tightly. “I’ve been really melancholy the last few days, because this is usually the time where [Menke] would kind of be running the show, this last little bit. So I’m particularly missing her now.” He’s always thought of his last draft of his screenplays as “the first edit of the movie, and the edit is the last draft. I like writing these big, novelistic tomes in screenplay form, and working it out as the movie goes on.” Without Menke around to take charge of post-production, Tarantino notes wryly, “I have to be more responsible for my own movie.”

ANDREW COOPER, SMPSP/WEINSTEIN CO.

Seattle weekly • DECEM BER 19−25, 2012

Django’s chief villain, a suitably sneering Leonardo DiCaprio.

Again, an “event” loomed: To be eligible for the 2012 Academy Awards, Django had to be ready for release before the end of this year. “It’s part of our strategy, obviously, or else we’d be opening in March,” Tarantino says. “I actually think the movie, commercially, would do fucking awesome in March, all right? But the film gets the push of a little Academy attention, it’ll do awesome right now.” At some point in the process, “We had to make that decision,” Tarantino says. “Do we have an Oscar movie, or do we not? And we all thought we did.” What makes an Oscar movie? “I can say this: For instance, if I wanted to go more explicit with the movie—it’s a really violent movie, all right? But if I wanted to go more violent with it, if I wanted to go further and make it more explicit and make sequences even more disturbing than they already are? Then I would have gone in March.” He cackles. From where you and I sit, Tarantino likely will be remembered as the key American auteur of his generation. But history records the industry’s respect via Academy Awards, and Tarantino has only one of those. It’s for writing 1994’s Pulp Fiction, and it’s an honor he shares with a friend from his video-store days, Roger Avary, who had story credit on the movie. Since patching that script together nearly

20 years ago, Tarantino and Avary have fallen out; also, in 2010, Avary spent eight months in jail after drunkenly crashing his car and killing a passenger. Avary, his friendship with Tarantino, and his contribution to the Pulp Fiction screenplay are not mentioned in the extensive biographical documentary material on the recently released box set Tarantino XX, which Tarantino told me he considers to be “pretty definitive.” Given that he has exactly as many Oscars as his ex-con ex-collaborator, it makes perfect sense that Tarantino would want an honor all his own. “How much do you care about Oscars?” I ask. Without a beat, he answers, “It would be really nice.”

he crowd at a typical L.A. industry screening is, shall we say, rather blasé. Yet at the first-come, firstserved first screening of Django Unchained, the feeling in the room is that everyone is fucking psyched that they got in. For some, Django might bear too many similarities to Tarantino’s last movie. Like Basterds, it’s a revenge epic informed by identity politics, and it hero-worships con men who, under deep cover, exploit a moral license to kill. Like Basterds, it climaxes with highly symbolic, pyrotechnic destruction. That said, it’s probably Tarantino’s funniest movie, while also unsparing in depicting the grotesque surreality of slavery; the two extremes often intertwine. Some of the funniest lines come out of the mouths of the most reprehensible characters; you laugh at a racist’s joke, then immediately recoil in guilt and horror. After the Directors Guild premiere, DGA president Taylor Hackford introduces Tarantino. “Thanks a lot,” Tarantino says to the crowd, which has risen in a standing ovation. “Shucks.” Hackford sets the tone of the conversation early when he credits Tarantino as the first filmmaker “to turn the mirror on America, and how we started.” Tarantino is the first to note that this crowd is not his toughest lay. After the fifth or sixth time Hackford recaps something “fantastic” that happened in the movie instead of actually posing a question, Tarantino cracks, “I’ve gotta say, coming here and listening to you describe my cool shots is pretty great!” He’s beaming. Who needs Cannes? Who needs Google? How Django will play in different rooms is still an open question, but I’ve now seen it twice, and while it lacks a certain aesthetic panache (to borrow a word from Waltz’s character), the script and the performances place it among Tarantino’s richest works. On one level, there’s a lot riding on its performance: It cost more than $80 million, making it Tarantino’s priciest movie ever. On the other hand, because Basterds was such a massive success, he’s got nothing to prove. “I made a lot of money on Inglourious Basterds—I don’t need to make that much money again,” he says. “I’m really happy and comfortable. And part of the reason to have success is so you can do that. So you can make the movie you want to make, and not have to be concerned about those kinds of monetary concerns.” E film@seattleweekly.com

»REVIEW

Wrong of the South

Tarantino tackles America’s original sin. BY SCOTT FOUNDAS

ANDREW COOPER, SMPSP/WEINSTEIN CO.

Tarantino, Alone » FROM PAGE 13

Waltz and Foxx as unlikely allies.

atching Django Unchained , it’s easy to imagine that Quentin Tarantino had such a blast making Inglourious Basterds that he decided to take his whole bloodspattered historical tent show down to antebellum Dixieland. Although not technically a Basterds prequel, Django stems from a similar impulse—to reframe and rewrite American history in boldly absurd strokes. Hollywood has mostly treated the “peculiar institution” at arm’s length. Only one modernera major-studio film, Richard Fleischer’s notorious 1975 Mandingo, dared to meet slavery on its own terms—as a grindhouse bacchanal of sadism, incest, and miscegenation that Tarantino has spoken of admiringly. The boisterous, outlandish, fiercely intelligent Django Unchained is at once an act of provocation and reparation— not just for slavery, but for Hollywood’s decades of saintly Negroes and sass-talking sidekicks. First seen in chains after being sold at auction, the captured runaway slave Django (Jamie Foxx) finds an unlikely savior in Dr. King Schultz (Christoph Waltz). A GermanAmerican bounty hunter, Schultz needs Django’s help in identifying three wanted men formerly employed by Django’s former owner. The time is 1858, three years before the Civil War, and the abolition-minded Schultz promises Django freedom and cash in exchange for his aid. When an actor becomes as closely associated with a character as Waltz did with his Nazi colonel in Basterds, it can be a risk for that actor and director to reteam so soon. But Waltz quickly allays any such fears, embodying the role with such exuberant, theatrical flair that you can’t imagine any other actor doing it. There’s joy in Foxx’s playing, too, and in his chemistry with Waltz, as he sheds the scarred skin of Django the slave to take on a series of new, more empowering alter egos. This being a Tarantino film, the theme of dramatic illusion is central. Schultz and Django don’t merely set out on a mission, they first “get into character”—Schultz as a slave trader and Django as his faithful valet—and choose their costumes. Foxx riding to a Tennessee plantation in Little

Lord Fauntleroy regalia ranks among Tarantino’s strongest visual gags. Then Django Unchained pauses for Wagner, as Django reveals that he has a wife named Broomhilda (Kerry Washington) in need of rescue, and the good German in turn relates the story of Der Ring des Nibelungen. So it’s on to Valhalla—or as it’s called here, Candyland—a sprawling Mississippi plantation named for its owner, Calvin Candie (Leonardo DiCaprio). An armchair phrenologist in a foppish burgundy suit and cigarette holder, his nervous eyes darting incestuously at his widowed sister, Candie is the least premeditated DiCaprio has ever seemed in a movie. But the true revelation of Candyland is Stephen (Samuel L. Jackson), a 76-year-old house slave who’s spent his life serving multiple generations of the Candie clan, and who has become institutionalized by time, his codependent relationship with his master, and the small margin of power he wields with perverted pleasure over the other slaves. Brilliantly acted by Jackson, this alternately deplorable and pitiable character is in some way the true villain of the piece. Stephen, too, is playing a role in a giant theater of the absurd, and has no intention of leaving the stage willingly. Here and in Basterds, Tarantino has ascended to a new level of filmmaking craft and narrative sophistication. And yet, probably because he came of age in a video store and has never quite lost the autodidact’s air of bullish authority, some cultural arbiters can’t take him seriously as an intellectual. But like all the best pop art, Tarantino’s film is both seriously entertaining and seriously thoughtful, rattling the cage of race onscreen and off. (Django’s coveted “freedom papers” can be seen as another black man’s long-form birth certificate.) So it seems only fitting that when Tarantino’s new Western hero rides off toward the horizon, he is silhouetted not by sunset, but by a raging ball of Wagnerian fire. E film@seattleweekly.com DJANGO UNCHAINED Opens Tues., Dec. 25 at SIFF Cinema Uptown and other theaters. Rated R. 165 minutes.

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et in East Germany in 1980, Christian Petzold’s superb Barbara is a transfixing Cold War thriller made even more vivid by its subtle overlay of the golden-era “woman’s picture,” the woman in question being Dr. Barbara Wolff, brilliantly played by Nina Hoss. As he did in his previous film, 2009’s Jerichow, a wry, pared-down riff on James M. Cain’s The Postman Always Rings Twice, Petzold uses familiar templates to offer fresh perspectives on historical rifts and wounds. We first see Barbara—lean, rigid, remote— stepping off a bus, a mere minute before beginning her new job at a provincial pediatric hospital. Previously employed at a prestigious clinic in Berlin, she has been reassigned to the boonies as punishment for applying for an exit visa. “She won’t even be one second early,” Stasi agent Klaus (Rainer Bock) says to André (Ronald Zehrfeld), the hospital’s burly head physician. Klaus and his state-security goons appear at Barbara’s doorstep or linger in parked cars outside her apartment building intermittently, just long enough so that their reign of terror sticks in the mind without overwhelming the movie. Petzold is intent on the costs of revealing and withholding in a surveillance state, of constantly wondering what’s fact and what’s ruse. “Is your story true?” Barbara coldly asks André after he shares with her the harrowing details of how he wound up ministering to the ill in the sticks. He is eager to befriend his new colleague, even impress her, as he tries to do with his detailed analysis of Rembrandt’s The Anatomy Lesson of Dr. Nicolaes Tulp. But even this innocuous disquisition seems to have an ulterior motive; any conversation they have might be, Barbara fears, a setup for her to reveal a telling detail that André passes on to the Stasi. Off-duty, Barbara is often in transit: on a bus to a restaurant where she exchanges a look with a waitress in the women’s room, who then hands her a wad of marks to be used for the doctor’s planned escape to Denmark; on a bicycle to the woods for an assignation with her boyfriend and co-conspirator from the West, who leaves her with a shopping bag filled with

The physician (Hoss) seeks to flee.

panty hose and other “luxuries” from his side of the divide. These moments, like every scene in Barbara, are punctuated by indelible details. In the restaurant episode, the female servers lie on the floor with their legs raised against the wall (when asked, Barbara assures her contact that this is indeed good for varicose veins); contained in her goodie bag from her lover is a box of West German cigarettes that André will remark on later. The precision makes Barbara not a wax museum of generic good guys and villains from the not-so-distant past but a richly textured imagining of that time. (The director was born in 1960 to parents who had recently emigrated from East to West Germany.) These specifics are also integral to the deepening and complex relationship between Barbara and André: Their fealty to their profession and their young charges suspends, if only temporarily, their unease around each other. The dissident doctor, unfailingly kind and warm with her patients, will make an enormous sacrifice for one of them: teenage Stella (Jasna Fritzi Bauer), an escapee from a juvenile workhouse—or “socialist extermination camp,” as Barbara calls it—who has been brought in with meningitis. Barbara’s act, beyond ratcheting up the tension of an expertly plotted film, also links our heroine to the great maternal altruists of ’30s and ’40s cinema whose names also served as film titles (Stella Dallas, Mildred Pierce). But unlike those martyrs, the physician’s deed is impelled not by masochism or self-abnegation but a sense of duty both to herself and her vocation. By the end of this impeccable movie, that commitment will be understood as her rescue—a deliverance emphasized by the best closing-credits song heard this year. E film@seattleweekly.com BARBARA Opens Fri., Dec. 21 at SIFF Cinema Uptown. Not rated. 105 minutes.

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It’s a

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Seth Rogen and Barbara Streisand star in a bland, gentle road comedy.

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wants his mom’s help challenges his affable shlubbiness. Rogen and Streisand clearly like each other, judging by the improvisational chemistry of their relationship, and their exchanges have the quarrelsome affection of long acquaintance. The tight focus on the characters yields a narrative gentleness that’s only surprising in a landscape of emphatic gross-out comedies, some of which Rogen has written himself. The Guilt Trip tees up scenes involving an eating contest, a strip club, and a casino, which in an overdetermined, situational film would have resulted in projectile vomiting, an embarrassing lap dance, and hitting the big jackpot, respectively. At each turn, Dan Fogelman’s script instead veers back to the filial relationship and the complications thereof. If you assume that Joyce the character is the same age as Streisand and do the math, then she gave birth to Andy at 40, which means he dodged the whole chromosomeabnormality bullet for which women of advanced maternal age are at risk. Viewers prone to intrusive thoughts and the obsessive need to mentally justify a film’s every incongruity can consider the broader societal trend toward older parenthood, and also that Streisand looks pretty great for her age, anyway. Plus, acting! If that doesn’t help, the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders prescribes helpful regimens that might alleviate your symptoms. E film@seattleweekly.com THE GUILT TRIP Opens Wed., Dec. 19 at Cinebarre and other theaters. Rated PG-13. 95 minutes.

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nce comic actors reach a particular career stage, they often choose one of two paths: a) They stop being funny and start being all Hallmark-heartwarming, i.e., by growing a beard and playing a psychiatrist. b) They accept unambitious, work-forhire roles in mass-market family comedies about some combination of dogs, weddings, road trips, Christmas, and babies. This is often a prelude to cover features in Modern Maturity, so it’s weird to see young Seth Rogen in such a broadly targeted family movie. In Anne Fletcher’s buddy comedy The Guilt Trip , Rogen is Andy Brewster, an organic chemist frustrated in his entrepreneurial efforts to sell the natural cleaning product he’s invented. He comes home to New Jersey to visit his widowed mother, Joyce, played by Barbra Streisand. After she tells her son about a sweetheart with whom she’d broken up to marry Andy’s father, he GoogleBings the guy’s name and finds his address in San Francisco. About to embark on a multi-city sales jaunt, he invites his mom along, ostensibly to spend time with her, but with the hidden agenda of hooking her up with the old boyfriend. Pairing Rogen and Streisand turns out to be inspired. The wisp of a plot serves as a platform for some strong comic dynamics—the only semi-important thing the film has to offer, other than a message of environmentally safe cleaning products and a huge shout-out to the National Cattlemen’s Beef Association. For an internationally famous doyenne who lives at a magnificent and heightened level of existence involving ambient harp glissandos and lilac fragrance, Streisand offers a spot-on portrayal of a retired, middle-class Gap aficionado. Andy’s multiple agendas and his own internal resistance to the fact that he kind of

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BEST FOREIGN LANGUAGE FILM

ONE OF THE YEAR’S BEST FILMS.” Not Such a Reach –Manohla Dargis, THE NEW YORK TIMES A.O. Scott, THE NEW YORK TIMES FILM COMMENT CRITICS POLL

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Ever the overachiever, Tom Cruise enjoyably inhabits a new action-hero role.

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A riveting performance.”

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n his 2005 novel One Shot, writer Lee Nicely paired: Pike and Cruise. Child lays out nine rules for surviving a five-against-one alley fight—a challenge his hero, the ex-Army cop Jack who has fallen off the grid, Reacher walks Reacher, is about to face. These include “Be through the D.A.’s office door. This on-cue on your feet and ready.” “Identify the ringentrance is indicative of a jokey tone McQuarleader.” “Don’t break the furniture.” Rule #9 rie maintains throughout the film, as if to let is the most important: “Don’t run head-on us know that neither he nor Cruise are taking into Jack Reacher. Not when he’s expecting this lone-hero stuff too seriously. it. It’s like running into an oak tree.” It turns out that Reacher despises Barr, As fans of Child’s 17 (and counting) but can’t resist helping Barr’s idealistic Reacher novels know, the drifter hero is defense attorney, Helen Rodin (English 6'5", which means that to bring this oak of actress Rosamund Pike, aces). After retraca man to life onscreen, the comparatively ing the killer’s steps, Reacher begins to have diminutive Tom Cruise (5'7") would have to doubts about Barr’s guilt, and once those five overcompensate with some serious toughthugs come to beat him senseless, it’s clear guy glowering. That was the expectation, there’s a conspiracy afoot. anyway. Instead, when surrounded on a Just why the bad guys are doing what dark Pittsburgh street by they’re doing remains five fools who’ve been Logic is rarely the point in a bit of a muddle at the paid a hundred bucks of Jack Reacher. Still, movies like this (and the end each to beat him bloody, logic is rarely the point novels that inspire them). in movies like this (and Cruise’s Reacher gives a wry “You asked for it” the novels that inspire shrug, then puts the five down. Effortlessly. them). There’s much to enjoy here: a goofily Convincingly. Cruise is definitely too short funny hallway fight between Reacher and two for the gig, but in this first fight, he proves thugs best described as “Dumb” and “Way his tough-guy chops. Outraged Reacher Dumber”; the unlikely sight of revered film readers can stand down. director Werner Herzog portraying an evil Written and directed by Christopher villain who chewed off his own fingers in a McQuarrie (co-writer of The Usual Suspects), Soviet gulag. And there’s the clear delight passing between Cruise and his Days of Jack Reacher opens as a sniper is setting up Thunder co-star Robert Duvall, who ambles in a car garage directly opposite PNC Park, into the third act in time to keep McQuarhome of the Pittsburgh Pirates. In a sequence rie’s relatively light touch from giving way to that calls to mind the cold, heartless grace of Reacher’s grim screw-the-courts brutality. a Brian De Palma set piece, we see what the If none of that works for you, then obsess killer sees, and wince as the rifle scope glides over the joy master cinematographer Caleb left, right, and then left again, as that killer Deschanel must have taken in bouncing light chooses, seemingly at random, who will die. off Pike’s resplendent blond hair. Should a Six shots ring out; five humans fall. beat-’em-up action flick be this beautiful? James Barr (Joseph Sikora), a retired Army Follow the light, Jack; follow the light. E sniper, is quickly arrested, but won’t talk, except to scrawl three words on a sheet of film@seattleweekly.com Primary paper: “Get Jack Reacher.” As the detective in charge (David Oyelowo) and the district attorJACK REACHER ney (Richard Jenkins) wonder aloud why Barr Opens Fri., Dec. 21 at Meridian has asked for a former military policeman and other theaters. Rated PG-13. 103 minutes.

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Les Mis is more faithful to Broadway than to Hugo.

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BARBARA Fri Dec 21–Mon Dec 24

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Opens Fri Dec 25 | Uptown UNIVERSAL PICTURES

Crowe as Inspector Javert.

a chain gang of prisoners hauling an enormous ship into port under the crash of waves and the glower of police inspector Javert (Russell Crowe). Later, when a paroled Valjean jumps bail and flees through a snow-capped mountain expanse, the film exudes a wide-open physical grandeur not often seen in musicals. There are a handful of other show-stopping moments along the way, though I’m not sure if the most-discussed of them—Anne Hathaway’s rendition of the tortured ballad “I Dreamed a Dream”—stops the show for the right reasons. The impassioned lament of Fantine, a fired factory worker forced into prostitution to support her illegitimate daughter, “I Dreamed a Dream” is already emotional pornography of the first order, made more so by Hathaway’s borderline-hysterical interpretation. Yet it’s hard to place too much fault on the direction of a movie that feels less like an exercise in filmmaking than in careful brand management. Once upon a time, directors entrusted with bringing some popular work of theater or literature to the screen were allowed to be creative, to reshape and adapt as they saw fit. But in today’s Hollywood, where “pre-awareness” reigns supreme and the rights-holders of underlying properties retain ever more say in the adaptation process, writers and directors are increasingly reduced to the level of corporate lackeys. Occasionally a filmmaker will still be given major leeway to reinvent a well-known character or franchise (as Christopher Nolan was for his Batman films), but more often— whether it’s Twilight or The Hunger Games or The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo—the clear mandate is to cater to the base, and Les Mis is no exception. Try as Hooper did to make this movie his own, the only real changes he was allowed were cosmetic and stylistic, and even smeared in shit, these gleaming icons cannot be dulled. The dream lives, but this movie remains in chains. E film@seattleweekly.com LES MISÉRABLES Opens Tues., Dec. 25 at SIFF Cinema Uptown and other theaters. Rated PG-13. 158 minutes.

SIFF Cinema Uptown FREE VALIDATED

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ou can hear the people sing—really hear them—in the long-gestating screen version of that Broadway juggernaut Les Misérables. Countering the standard practice of having the actors in a film musical lip-synch their songs to prerecorded tracks, director Tom Hooper (The King’s Speech) insisted that all the singing in his Les Mis happen live on the set, in the moment, with hidden earpieces allowing the actors to hear the orchestrations. The result is a movie musical unlike any you’ve heard before: Real voices emerge in real time, complete with assorted tremors, gasps for breath, and other “imperfections” of the sort typically smoothed away in the studio. The live singing is but one part of Hooper’s concerted effort to inject grit and verisimilitude into Les Mis—a lofty strategy that has become folly by late in the film, when the proletarian hero Jean Valjean (Hugh Jackman) sloshes through the sewers of Paris with the body of the wounded revolutionary Marius (Eddie Redmayne) slung across his mighty shoulders, both men caked in human excrement. For the more Hooper tries—and oh, how he tries, ratcheting the filth amp to 11 and shooting almost everything with an arsenal of wide-angled, hand-held cameras—the more the source material’s moist-eyed storybook romanticism proves resilient to his efforts. It’s doubtful, after all, that realism—or any semblance of it—is what audiences were seeking when they turned the 1985 British stage production into a blockbuster. Liberally inspired by Victor Hugo’s 1862 novel, Les Misérables the musical boils down Hugo’s panoramic study of the underclasses between the end of the French Revolution and the failed Paris uprisings of 1832 to a series of noble peasant heroes, cardboard villains, and star-crossed lovers belting out sound-alike anthems about the resilience of the human spirit. Onstage, Les Mis has about as much to do with Hugo as Rent has to do with Puccini, but it has undeniable kitsch appeal. Onscreen there are fewer pleasures, though the opening moments are undeniably impressive in an oldfashioned, epic-monolithic way, as the camera drifts up from underwater to reveal Valjean and

5 Golden Globe® Nominations

holiday film guide ❄

The Ring Cycle

Judd Apatow’s latest is long, aimless, and worth it.

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BY ALAN SCHERSTUHL

Seattle weekly • DECEM BER 19−25, 2012

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adly, country songwriters stand as nearly the only entertainers in our popular culture who craft memorable art on the subject of marriage, the state in which just less than half of Americans spend the majority of their lives. A few years back, Brad Paisley compared the odds of newlyweds lasting to those of an airliner making it to its destination. He concludes, on the chorus, “If love was a plane, nobody’d get on.” But we still board, despite knowing those odds. And nobody bucks against them harder than Judd Apatow, who has committed himself not only to matrimony but, with This Is 40, to something even less likely: making a good movie about it. He hasn’t quite succeeded, but he hasn’t made a bad one. In fact, the biggest problems with Apatow’s messy, sprawling, perceptive comedy have more to do with his goals than his execution. Jeanine Basinger diagnoses the difficulty he faces in her forthcoming book I Do and I Don’t: A History of Marriage in Movies: “Marriage had no story arc,” Basinger writes, describing old Hollywood’s reluctance to examine life after courtship. So it’s easy to carp that This Is 40 is too long, too aimless, too alert to small resentments, and too stingy with the comic set pieces and gelcapped life lessons that made Apatow’s Knocked Up and The 40-Year-Old Virgin such hits. It’s even easier to complain, “The trailer promised big laughs and lots of triumphs, but other than those two happy minutes, the movie is devoted to showing us Leslie Mann and Paul Rudd pickle in each other’s presence.” That’s all true. But those resentments are sharply observed, and the pickling is honest, more familiar from life than from movies, and almost always droll if not laugh-out-loud funny. A scene of husband Pete (Rudd) upsetting wife Debbie (Mann) with his bed farts is tinged with tragic truth—what is marriage but the process of acclimating to each other’s gases? More painful still is the moment when Debbie, seeking sex, bares the breasts she has been worrying over as her 40th birthday approaches—only to be rebuffed as Pete monkeys with his iPad. (Mann is Apatow’s realworld wife, and the children in the movie are

Marital vets Mann and Rudd.

Apatow and Mann’s real-world children, so all this naked-truth stuff is complicated.) Occasionally, Apatow’s gifts for comedy and pain come together beautifully. Debbie and Pete laugh in bed about how much they hate each other, sometimes, and then how exactly they would murder each other. Her answer—a slow poisoning—gets more involved as she describes it, and Mann makes the most of her showcase. Debbie is the first female character in an Apatow film as engaging and fucked-up as the boys. Rudd dampens his natural charm, but he’s also funny when not brooding. The Apatow children, though, are both marvelous. One searing eruption from Maude Apatow, age 13 at the time of filming, marks the film’s emotional high point. This Is 40 offers story beats here, but nothing like a story. The family is having money troubles, which stands to reason considering both Debbie and Pete have cutesy movie-character jobs. Meanwhile, between fights and reconciliations, the couple frets about turning 40 and endures unsatisfying visits to and from their fathers (Albert Brooks and John Lithgow). What the movie most resembles is a “harold,” one of those improv shows where the troupe takes one suggestion and then develops interrelated comic scenes based on everything that suggestion might possibly contain. Some scenes work; some don’t. Only one is as funny as those in Apatow’s first two films—it involves an agitated Melissa McCarthy—and a couple break the film’s reality. Apatow hasn’t quite beaten the odds, and this film—like his undervalued Funny People, which improves with rewatching—will play best for audiences who know what they’re in for. Much like marriage, This Is 40 is somewhat formless, and it almost never hurries up. But life is improved by having the option. E film@seattleweekly.com THIS IS 40 Opens Fri., Dec. 21 at Pacific Place and other theaters. Rated R. 133 minutes.

film» BY BRIAN MILLER

• WHITE CHRISTMAS Bing Crosby, Danny Kaye, and

Rosemary Clooney star in this holiday favorite from 1954, adapted from Irving’s Berlin’s musical stage show and directed by Michael Curtiz. Classic tunes include Berlin’s “Blue Skies,” “Mandy,” and “White Christmas.” (G) SIFF Cinema Uptown, $5-$10, Fri., Dec. 21, 4 p.m.; Dec. 22-24, 1:30 & 4 p.m.

Local Film • APOCALYPSE FILM FESTIVAL For those sick of

Ongoing

• ARGO Ben Affleck’s third directorial effort begins with

•

JOHNNY LEGEND PRESENTS CHRISTMAS IN ACIDLAND See the SIFF website for the full schedule

for this package of seasonal oddities. Mr. Legend will introduce each screening in the series, which includes Andy Kaufman, Johnny Winters, Liberace, Jack Webb, Bing Crosby, and other Christmas-lovers. (NR) SIFF Film Center, $5-$10, Dec. 21-23. NWFF HOLIDAY PARTY Cap Hill’s essential cinematheque celebrates the holidays with snacks, eggnog, dancing, music, games, and more. Potluck donations encouraged. Seasonal attire optional. (NR) Northwest Film Forum, Free, Fri., Dec. 21, 7 p.m. SANS SOLEIL The late French director Chris Marker (1921–2012) is honored with this ruminative, interminably talky 1982 travelogue. Basically a documentary portrait of Japan, Sans Soleil is also a diary alternating between two narrators. Topics include colonialism, Tarkovsky, Godard, Hitchcock’s Vertigo, the Khmer Rouge, Lech Walesa, and the pope. (NR) Northwest Film Forum, $6-$10, Thu., Dec. 20, 7 p.m.

•

Send events to film@seattleweekly.com See seattleweekly.com for full listings = Recommended

•

the November 4, 1979, attack on the U.S. embassy in Tehran. While 52 Americans are held hostage, six embassy workers manage to escape, ultimately hiding out at the home of Canadian ambassador (Victor Garber). Determined to smuggle the houseguests out of Iran by disguising them as a film crew on a location scout, CIA exfiltration expert Tony Mendez (Affleck) enlists the help of John Chambers (John Goodman), a movie makeup artist, and Lester Siegel (Alan Arkin), an old-school producer. Between hokey wisecracks ribbing industry idiocy, the trio seizes on a dusty script for a Star Wars rip-off called Argo. Affleck’s movie doesn’t reflect who we are now so much as it argues for what Hollywood can be. It’s a love letter from Affleck to the industry that made him, shunned him, and loves nothing more than to be loved. (R) Karina Longworth SIFF Cinema Uptown, Varsity, Meridian, others FLIGHT In this fine, melancholy character study, William “Whip” Whitaker (Denzel Washington) wakes after a bender and gets ready for work with a snort of coke. Then he swaggers into the cockpit of his passenger jet. When the plane goes into a sudden free fall, he improvises a miraculous plan that brings craft and passengers down more or less safely. Later, in order to hush up a medical report of Whip’s potent bloodalcohol level, Hugh Lang (Don Cheadle), is brought in to do damage control with union rep (Bruce Greenwood). Also “helping” is Whip’s dealer, played with dirtbag bonhomie by John Goodman. Calm and chaos commingle beautifully in the crash-landing set piece as handled by director Robert Zemeckis. Zemeckis hasn’t lost his touch with actors; he coaches Washington into one of those rare performances that suggests much more than it shows. (R) Nick Pinkerton Meridian, Thornton Place, Varsity, others SILVER LININGS PLAYBOOK If you took the fighting out of The Fighter, David O. Russell’s previous movie, you’d be left with a close, fractious family like the Solitanos of his hugely appealing new Silver Linings Playbook. Instead of Boston Irish and boxing, we have Philadelphia Italian and the Eagles. The family patriarch (a fine, restrained Robert De Niro) is an OCD bookie bound by strange rituals to the team; his wideeyed wife (Jacki Weaver) is the nervous family conciliator/enabler; and their volatile son Pat (Bradley Cooper, wired) is fresh out of the nuthouse with a restraining order from his ex. Pat’s most recent violent outburst has the cops and neighbors suspicious, but he claims he’s a new—and newly positive—man. He’s looking for those silver linings through self-improvement: reading, running, losing weight, scheming to win back his wife. His obsession frightens his parents and frightens us— is another explosion near? Russell keeps the film constantly off-balance, but his pell-mell approach suits the story of Pat’s mania and wrong-footed romance with young widow Tiffany. In that role, Jennifer Lawrence is a revelation: tough, proud, and even more titanic in her instability than Pat. Silver Linings is one of the year’s best films, and Lawrence a lock for an Oscar nomination. (R) Brian Miller Sundance Cinemas, Oak Tree, Lincoln Square, Pacific Place, others

THEATERS: Admiral, 2343 California Ave. SW, 938-3456;

Big Picture, 2505 First Ave., 256-0566; Big Picture Redmond, 7411 166th Ave. NE, 425-556-0566; Central Cinema, 1411 21st Ave., 686-6684; Cinebarre, 6009 SW 244th St. (Mountlake Terrace)., 425-672-7501; Cinerama, 2100 Fourth Ave., 448-6680; Crest, 16505 Fifth Ave. NE, 781-5755; Egyptian, 801 E. Pine St., 781-5755; Grand Illusion, 1403 NE 50th St., 523-3935; Guild 45, 2115 N. 45th St., 781-5755; Harvard Exit, 807 E. Roy St., 781-5755; iPic Theaters, 16451 N.E. 74th St. (Redmond), 425-6365601; Kirkland Parkplace, 404 Park Place, 425-827-9000; Lincoln Square, 700 Bellevue Way N, 425-454-7400; Majestic Bay, 2044 NW Market St., 781-2229; Meridian, 1501 Seventh Ave., 223-9600; Metro, 4500 Ninth Ave. NE, 781-5755; Northwest Film Forum, 1515 12th Ave., 2675380; Oak Tree, 10006 Aurora Ave. N, 527-1748; Pacific Place, 600 Pine St., 888-262-4386; Seven Gables, 911 NE 50th St., 781-5755; SIFF Cinema Uptown, 511 Queen Anne Ave. N., 324-9996; SIFF Film Center, 305 Harrison St. (Seattle Center), 324-9996; Sundance Cinemas, 4500 Ninth Ave NE, 633-0059; Thornton Place, 301 NE 103rd St., 517-9953; Varsity, 4329 University Way NE, 781-5755.

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Fri Dec 21–Thu Dec 27 At the Uptown

The official German submission for the Academy Awards

BARBARA Fri Dec 21–Mon Dec 24

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FIDDLER ON THE ROOF Sing Along

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SIFF Cinema Uptown FREE VALIDATED

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THE CHRISTMAS SPECIALS SPECIAL

Seat tle weekly • DECEM BER 19−25, 2012

glad tidings and goodwill during this holiday season, SIFF is offering nothing but gloom, famine, and global destruction in its Apocalypse Film Festival. Of special note is Children of Men, released so late and with so little studio support in 2006 that it was criminally overlooked by Oscar voters. Alfonso Cuarón’s adaptation of the P.D. James novel envisions an infertile, environmentally blighted planet, with Clive Owen as possibly the last decent man on Earth. Britain has become a near-police state, and selfishness reigns supreme. It’s Ayn Rand meets Gitmo, with some of the most astonishing long-take action scenes ever put to film. (R) BRIAN MILLER SIFF Cinema Uptown, $5-$10, Wed., Dec. 19, 9 p.m. Through Dec. 20. THE CHRISTMAS SPECIALS SPECIAL Skeletor, Charo, and Michael Keaton are represented in this Yuletide collection of shorts and oddities. (NR) SIFF Film Center, $5, Mon., Dec. 24, 7 p.m. ELF In the surprise 2003 Christmas hit Elf, Will Ferrell embraces the cutesy confection of its plot. Santa Claus doles out presents at an orphanage; a wee human crawls into his sack of toys, winds up at the North Pole, and is subsequently raised as an elf. Eight zillion sight gags constitute the first act, in which a giantsized Ferrell bangs his head into low ceilings, squats on miniature crappers, and botches even the most remedial toy-making duties. Ferrell finally discovers he’s the bastard son of James Caan, now a distant, terse Manhattan publishing-house exec. Innocent, syrup-swilling Ferrell then goes to big, bad NYC, meets Zooey Deschanel, and hilarity often ensues. Ferrell owns the movie the way Santa owns Christmas. Directed by Jon Favreau. (G) ANDREW BONAZELLI Central Cinema, $6-$8, Through Dec. 23, 7 & 9:30 p.m. FIDDLER ON THE ROOF SING-ALONG How do Jews celebrate Christmas? With Chinese food (kosher buffet begins at 12:30 p.m.) and Topol, who stars in this tuneful 1971 adaptation of the Broadway show based on stories by Sholom Aleichem. The songs by Jerry Bock and Sheldon Harnick include “Tradition” and “Sunrise, Sunset.” Don’t be shy about joining in. (G). SIFF Cinema Uptown, $5-$10, Tue., Dec. 25, 1 p.m. IT’S A WONDERFUL LIFE SEE THE WIRE, PAGE 23. KISS KISS BANG BANG Screenwriting prodigy Shane Black made his reputation in the late ’80s with Lethal Weapon-genre action flicks; then the Tarantino revolution nearly ended his career. Yet now behind the camera for this pulp/noir comedy-homage, Black reveals himself to be more of a Hollywood classicist than some might acknowledge. He’s got a sense of humor about hoary old gumshoe conventions and dames in tight red dresses, even if the 2005 KKBB is rather too pleased with its Hollywood self-reflexiveness. Narrator Robert Downey Jr. is a thief-turned-actor who stumbles onto real crimes while prepping for a role with Val Kilmer’s tough-but-gay private investigator. (Michelle Monaghan plays the girl.) KKBB has the stop-start rhythm of a two-stroke engine, and I’ve seen tighter plotting on Matlock. But Black delivers the sensation of riffling through yellowed pages in a dime-store novel, the snorting pleasure of giving a stewardess a kooky name so Monaghan can introduce her as “my friend Flicka.” (R) BRIAN MILLER Central Cinema, $6-$8, Wed., Dec. 19, 7 & 9:30 p.m.

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DECEMBER 2012/JANUARY 2013 | SEATTLE WEEKLY’S MUSIC REVIEW

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The Best Seattle Albums of 2012

The Year In Music Andrew Gospe on actually listening to music

Charles R. Cross on Macklemore

Ma'C hell Duma LaVassar on Father John Misty

Reve r b • Seat tle weekly • DECEMBER 19−25, 2012

Creativity was never meant to be kept in a

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»EDITOR’S LETTER

The Right Fight

IT’S TIME FOR ARTISTS TO FIGHT PIRACY AS VIGOROUSLY AS THEY’VE CHALLENGED PANDORA.

There are essentially three ways of getting music on the Internet: steal it, pay for it, or get it for free (and, often, suffer through ads). The latter two often pay musicians fractions of pennies for every stream and transaction. The former gives musicians none. The latter are considered by many industry voices as the beginning stages of a new, sustainable business model. The former has consumed half of the recorded-music business. Guess which of these drew the most heat from artists in 2012? One of the year’s most peculiar yet persistent music-industry trends has been the way legitimate forms of digital-music consumption have been vilified more strongly than illegitimate ones. It’s become commonplace for streaming services like Spotify and Rhapsody to be derided for their “insubstantial” payments to artists, but for piracy to be seen as something that’s not worth speaking out against. Just last week The Wall Street Journal’s Marc Myers said record labels had been “slammed by streaming music services and digital downloads” (whatever that means), but didn’t mention piracy; a government employee on the periphery of the music business recently told me the piracy train has already left the station, and fighting it is futile. Last month, under the banner of musicFIRST, a coalition of “musicians, recording artists, music businesses, and supporters united for fair pay,” dozens of artists (Sheryl Crow, Billy Joel, Katy Perry, and many others) signed a letter speaking out against the Internet Radio Fairness Act (IRFA), legislation that would lower the performance royalties Pandora and other online radio stations pay artists per play (terrestrial radio doesn’t pay this

royalty at all). Since the early days of Napster through today—when the industry has been upended by listeners taking music without paying for it—there has never been a similar effort to combat piracy. Yes, several artists have spoken out—notably, Cracker’s David Lowery published a popular essay against piracy this year, sparking plenty of temporary conversation but no coordinated action—but have never united against the crime as they’ve rallied against IRFA. The result has been a narrative left unchanged. The conventional wisdom is that artists aren’t hurt when albums are stolen, that record labels exist to exploit musicians, and all sins are forgiven when you buy a T-shirt at a concert. Few artists will tell you this narrative is true—but even fewer will speak publicly to correct it. And when they do, they are eviscerated, as Lars Ulrich, Lily Allen, or Duff McKagan will tell you (McKagan, co-founder of Guns N’ Roses and a longtime SW contributor, is one of the few artists who signed the musicFIRST letter who also has spoken out strongly against piracy). This is why it’s time for artists to band together to set the story straight. Don’t leave it to the few brave enough to speak strongly on the matter. There needs to be a large, coordinated effort by bands big and small to tell their story—to sign a letter to fans explaining how devastating piracy is to their ability to make music for a living (or at all). “The voice of that comity is clearly the most important,” says Chris Ruen, author of the recent book, Freeloading: How Our Insatiable Hunger for Free Content Starves Creativity. “Artists need to raise their voices.” Such an effort wouldn’t end piracy. But it would correct the narrative, and only when there is a clear understanding of a problem can a solution be found. E —Chris Kornelis, editor, Reverb Monthly ckornelis@seattleweekly.com

ANDREW GOSPE | What happens when

4 6 7

THE BEST OF 2012 Other than your favorite, of course.

EDITOR Chris Kornelis

BY CHARLES R. CROSS

PROOFREADER Michael Mahoney

Macklemore’s big splash in a new stream.

COLUMNISTS Duff McKagan, John Roderick,

THE CARRIE DIARIES

CONTRIBUTORS Gwendolyn Elliott, Gregory

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December 19

Ain’t Misbehavin’

FRIDAY DEC. 21ST

»reverb monthly

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Jazz Alley is a Supper Club

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The Writer Is Listening

We could all stand to spend more time listening to bands, not the echo chamber. BY ANDREW GOSPE

ver the past eight months, I’ve listened to and written about more than 800 bands. This includes locals, outof-town touring acts, openers, headliners, rappers who hawk CDs on street corners, bar bands with poorly recorded Bandcamp demos, and multiplatinum-selling pop stars with major-label deals. It includes punk rockers at the Blue Moon, dubstep DJs at WaMu Theater, and bluegrass ensembles at the Tractor Tavern. I review a half-dozen or so records every month for Reverb Monthly’s “Every Local Release” feature (we reviewed hundreds of local releases in these pages in 2012; reread them all at seattleweekly.com/reverb monthly), but the bulk of my listening this year has come through writing the majority of the Weekly’s Seven Nights music calendar. You’ll find it in the back of the music section every week, with the bands grouped by day and each show accompanied by a 10-to50-word synopsis, the venue’s address, and a ticket price. It’s certainly not glamorous work; in fact, it’s unbylined. You could also make a strong case that, considering the less-thanrobust health of newspapers, print music calendars will soon be obsolete. That would be a shame, because writing the music calendar has reconnected me to the most fundamental aspect of music writing: listening to it.

In 2012, music writing is largely about perpetuating narratives. To borrow a phrase from Hipster Runoff, some of the year’s biggest stories involved “human memes” like Lana Del Rey, Amanda Palmer, or Riff Raff, whose extramusical theatrics firmly outweigh their artistic offerings. In September, thousands of bloggers dedicated thousands of words to excoriate Palmer for her ethically dubious choice to recruit amateur musicians pro bono in each city of her tour rather than pay a professional backing band. Far fewer writers bothered to weigh in on her album Theatre Is Evil, released the same month in a top-10 Billboard debut. Or consider an artist like Frank Ocean, whose very good but nowhere-close-totranscendent channel ORANGE has been discussed, analyzed, and think-pieced into oblivion. It’s also the closest thing this year has to a consensus best album, garnering praise as much for Ocean’s claustrophobic, selfexploratory take on R&B as for his backstory: Shortly before the album’s release, he announced that his “first love” was a man, a nearly unprecedented move for a major star in the notoriously homophobic world of hip-hop. It’s reminiscent of Kanye West’s My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy, which became the closest thing 2010 had to a consensus best album, based on the widely held belief that ’Ye finally overcame his massive id to make

Reve r b • Seat tle weekly • DECEMBER 19−25, 2012

»2012

Goodwill Ambassador

great art. Less important was the question of whether the art itself actually was great. The current music-writing climate—the network of mp3 blogs, Bandcamp, Facebook pages, Soundcloud, Tumblr, and the websites of now-defunct print magazines—provides a fascinating paradox. Now more than ever, the Internet makes it easy to access and evaluate a band’s music on its own merits. (I can’t imagine how much harder it must have been to compile a calendar even as recently as 10 years ago.) But it also makes it easier than ever to plug into the echo chamber—the countless “reaction” blog posts and ersatz cultural analyses—and tune out the music itself. Of course, context is key in criticism, and this isn’t meant to sound like a freshman lit major’s formalist diatribe about how art must be assessed in a vacuum. But too frequently, context is an excuse to sidestep the kind of analytical deep listening that should be the foundation of music criticism, and I’ve been as guilty of this as anyone. That’s where the calendar comes in. Every week it requires me to listen to bands for whom no critical consensus exists, bands with nothing but bare-bones Facebook pages (or too often, regrettably, ReverbNation pages) where the music is the only thing on which to base my opinion. In short, it’s reemphasized the sort of work I’m supposed to be doing as a music writer, while refuting the idea that a band must have a certain amount of

cultural cachet to deserve a write-up. Seven Nights has also turned me on to Seattle’s underrated musical diversity. Right now the national music scene recognizes Seattle for reverent folk and positive-vibing hip-hop, but there’s far more going on here. Each week I come across acts that play nowave sludge punk, jazz/funk fusion, experimental electronica, and countless other niche genre constructs. When I started writing the calendar in April, I was worried

In 2012, music writing is largely about perpetuating narratives. that I’d end up writing about an endless cycle of the same bands playing the same venues. That hasn’t been a problem, and likely won’t be: According to a recent study from Richard Florida at The Atlantic Cities, Seattle has approximately 37,224 bands, the ninth-highest number of any U.S. metropolitan area. One could quibble with Florida’s polling method (MySpace data from 2007), but the results are impressive. More important, it puts the work I’ve done into perspective. Eight hundred bands is but a small snapshot of our city’s music—a minuscule one, really, when I consider my blind spots: I don’t cover jazz adequately, I too often overlook smaller clubs, and I ignore classical music entirely. So in 2013, expect the calendar to broaden its coverage to better reflect Seattle’s music scene. As for me, I’ll let listening be my guide. E music@seattleweekly.com

The threads are cheap. The music is free.

What Macklemore’s breakthrough says about the state of the music industry. BY CHARLES R. CROSS

o understand the impact Macklemore’s commercial breakthrough, The Heist, had on local music this year, you only had to be sitting next to my 12-year-old son during a recent conversation. “Dad, can I ask you a music-industry favor?” he asked. As my offspring, he had met a slew of rock stars, so I wasn’t sure if he was going to ask for Keith Richards to show up at his next show-and-tell, or something more mundane. “OK, what?” “Can you drive me and a few of my friends to Goodwill so we can see where Macklemore’s ‘Thrift Shop’ video was filmed?” This was one “industry favor” easily arranged, so the next weekend I set out

for Goodwill with a station wagon full of suburban junior-high-school boys, part of Macklemore’s central demographic. My son had been to Goodwill numerous times before—half my house was furnished from there—but “Thrift Shop” had changed the way he thought of the place. “I wonder if Macklemore will be there?” he asked. “Uh, sure,” I said. But my son wasn’t half as starry-eyed as the other kids. “I bet a lot more people are going to Goodwill since that video,” one said. “I’m not sure people go to Goodwill for the glamour,” I replied. “I’m going to buy a big fur coat there, like Macklemore,” another boasted. “Do you think I can get that for $40?” “Yeah, I’m certain.”

“Do you think they have a section of Macklemore merch?” another asked. The very fact that a 12-year-old would use the word “merch” gives you a picture of how today’s music audience understands marketing, and prefers buying T-shirts to CDs. My son had in fact asked if he and his friends could watch the “Thrift Shop” video on my phone as we drove—which they did repeatedly. I waited in the car while they “shopped,” which in their case meant running through

the store, in love with being young and with what Macklemore represents to them. To a degree, it was the same thing the Sex Pistols meant to me growing up in a different era: music that made me feel sophisticated, powerful, discontented, and slightly, but not actually, dangerous. In the end, they bought nothing at Goodwill. These boys, like so many music consumers, were content to watch the streaming video all the way home. E music@seattleweekly.com

Reve r b • Seattle weekly • DECEMBER 19−25, 2012

CHRIS HORNBECKER

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Reve r b • Seat tle weekly • DECEMBER 19−25, 2012

arrie Brownstein had a pretty awesome 2012. Her band Wild Flag mounted a successful tour, her IFC comedy series Portlandia won a Peabody and got renewed for a third season, and her voice just appeared in an episode of The Simpsons. As the year winds down, we caught up with the Seattle-born multihyphenate to chat about her banner year, her work on Portlandia, and her current cultural obsessions. (The third season of Portlandia premieres January 4 at 10 p.m. on IFC.) SW: I’m going to go out on a limb and say 2012 was a pretty good year for you. Brownstein: I feel very fortunate for this

past year. There were a lot of very surreal events that transpired for which I’m very proud. I feel like this is fleeting, so I’m just trying to enjoy it and not take it for granted and just be happy about it. It’s been very fulfilling, but it makes me just want to keep working and keep working harder.

I don’t know how busy you were when you were doing Sleater-Kinney fulltime, but I have to imagine that with a new band and a TV show in production, your schedule is pretty busy. Was that a major adjustment to your life?

With Fred [Armisen] still doing Saturday Night Live, there’s sort of a natural time limit for Portlandia in terms of the production schedule, so that leaves a natural break in which I can work on other things. I think one thing that contributes to my happiness and a decrease in anxiety was realizing that I function better with a certain amount of business

Cultural archeologists Carrie Brownstein and Fred Armisen. »QUESTIONS/ANSWERS

The Carrie Diaries

The Wild Flag and Portlandia star had one hell of a 2012. BY DAVE LAKE

and productivity. It has definitely changed my schedule and my relationship to whatever constitutes home, but aside from that it’s only been wonderful. Did you have any sense of where your career would take you after SleaterKinney?

I was 31 when Sleater-Kinney broke up, so I felt like, “I really hope my best years are not behind me.” I felt like I had more to do. I started writing for NPR, writing a blog for them, which I found very fulfilling and a great way to keep engaged with music and in an ongoing dialogue about fandom and collecting. I got a book deal, and my plan was just to focus on writing. In the meantime, Fred and I were working on these little videos under the moniker ThunderAnt without a lot of ambition or intention behind them. They weren’t even supposed to be funny. They just seemed kind of weird and a way for us to hang out. But it did start to seem that potentially they had this sensibility, and that he and I had started to develop this on-camera chemistry. It kind of happened in the same way that Sleater-

Kinney did. Corin [Tucker] and I knew that we liked writing music together and we knew that it was good, but I was still in college when that band started. I am ambitious and I am intentional, but strangely the two most successful things I’ve done have been nurtured in this organic way, separate from the industry. They’ve come to light on the fringes and been discovered or pushed out into the public without that having been the initial intention.

Part of the fun of Portlandia is all the pop-culture stuff you guys touch on. The season premiere has a story line involving MTV, and there’s the sketch from last season where the couple becomes obsessed with Battlestar Galactica . What are your current popculture obsessions?

Similar to everyone else obsessed with Homeland, I definitely watched in the same way that Doug and Claire watched Battlestar Galactica last year. I was on tour and I started watching Homeland, and I would be tired from playing shows, but I would stay up for two to three hours past when I should be

asleep, watching that show and then reading about it and Tweeting about it. I just started watching Walking Dead, which I’m now totally obsessed with. I love Girls, and Louis C.K.’s Louie was a show I became obsessed with and could watch those episodes over and over. Do you have the same obsessive relationship to movies and music?

Not so much movies, because I really love to see movies in the theater. There are so few experiences as an audience member where you feel cut off in a good, refreshing way from your phone or the outside world, and a movie theater still provides that all-encompassing experience. I saw Bruce Springsteen the other night in Portland, and I did not get on my phone. I didn’t Tweet about it or take pictures. I felt very immersed, and I love situations that can be immersive like that. I do go record shopping, like twice a month. Dirty Projectors had an album this year called Swing Lo Magellan, and the song “Dance for You” I probably listened to literally a thousand times. Same with Ariel Pink. He has a song called “Mature Themes” that I cued up over and over again in my car, and it started to feel like an OCD thing. It’s like you’re fixating on some meditative phrase in your head, except that it’s a show or a song. I’m not good with meditation or yoga or relaxation, so those moments that cycle back over and over again become hypnotic and a way for me to center myself. I think those kinds of healthy obsessions are OK. E music@seattleweekly.com

»ESSAY

Fox Trot Father John Misty brings sex, drugs, and hijinks to 2012 folk. BY MA’CHELL DUMA LAVASSAR

The character Father John Misty.

Tillman told me the songs were dictated, not written down—not hard to imagine, as they suggest him laying down verses over the beats in his head. He applies this philosophy to the ’70s-AM-radio and SoCalcountry scenes for a record full of bizarro hip-hop/honky-tonk hybrids. The lyrical content does not disappoint, either. On “I’m Writing a Novel,” a tripping, balls-out (perhaps literally) Tillman determines he must murder his inner Neil Young to the tune of “The Ballad of John and Yoko” if he’s ever gonna “write the real.” Eloquent kiss-off track “Well, You Can Do It Without Me” holds up as a poem on its own. Not one to shy away from melodrama, Tillman goes from folk to disco within a chorus, transforming “Nancy From Now On” into the greatest Eagles song you’ve never heard. His trip takes a heavy turn on “Now I’m Learning to Love the War” as he contemplates the environmental impact of the arts. If the record has “a single,” it’s “Hollywood Forever Cemetery Sings.” A lush, dirty track full of disjointed guitar work, it proves above all else that what Tillman has really lifted from hip-hop and applied to Father John Misty is swagger. It’s a reverberating, bump-and-grind backlash to the trail of predecessors who took Fleet Foxes’ very pure and purposeful musical statement and watered it down to a hand-holding soundtrack for tweens whose visions of male genitals are still modeled after Ken dolls. It’s this attitude that makes Fear Fun Cialis for a nearly neutered genre, and sets the bar for the next wave of futuristic folk releases. E music@seattleweekly.com

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aura surrounding Los Angeles musical mecca Laurel Canyon. On Fear Fun, this year’s wonderfully named debut, Tillman packs up the tools he learned in Fleet Foxes and sets up camp in his own piece of the Canyon, a fictitious piece of cosmic real estate once owned by Jackson Browne, now leased to him by Don Henley, and inhabited by the ghosts of Gram Parsons, Jim Morrison, Harry Nilsson, and (whom one can only guess to be a very bored) Tupac Shakur. Yes, Tupac. As much as Fear Fun is a musical novel—the songs are practically chapters—the power of the record resides in its rhythms, which are dance-oriented and ultramodern and add a deliberate cadence to the sort of narrative you generally find in hip-hop. In an interview earlier this year,

ART CREDIT

Fear Fun sets the bar for the next wave of futuristic folk releases.

EMMA GARR

ew musicians of Josh Tillman’s generation can claim a hand in both the construction and deconstruction of a musical genre. But after achieving inarguable success with modernist folkies Fleet Foxes, Tillman appears to have felt his arms had taken him as far as they could. Naturally, he decided to put his hips to work instead. Enter Father John Misty: ROCK STAR, Tillman’s nom de plume, a self-characterization meant to reveal little or nothing, depending on what he’s ’fessing up to that day. Who can blame him? In a TMI age, it’s nearly impossible to build a good rock ’n’ roll myth. It is both a blessing and a curse that we will never have another Led Zeppelin—we need those legends about Legends. They exist to shape culture and drive young artists. By adapting the Father John Misty persona, Tillman has been able to dabble in both personal revelation and performance art—and of course unaccountability, and what his critics will call “copping out.” Both Bob Dylan and Lou Reed—back when his week was better than your year— aptly played heightened self-image to their advantage. It’s hard not to think they would be somewhat less iconic had their eras been cursed with omnipresent Twitter accounts. And as much as he plays with the idea, Tillman is certainly reverent toward rock and its mythology—namely the balmy, mystic

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Reve r b • Seat tle weekly • DECEMBER 19−25, 2012

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What I heard, loved, and rediscovered over the past 12 months. BY TODD HAMM

2011

was a good year. The sun shone a bit, flowers bloomed to appropriate levels, Marshawn Lynch liberated a dozen Arab countries with a single stiff-arm. I mean, it’s a little hazy now, but I have fond half-memories. 2012, though, kicked even more ass. The sky was blue for an unnaturally long time, and flowers grew so tall and healthy that they learned to play instruments, form bands, break up, and play reunion gigs. Oh, and pot’s legal, and everyone can marry whomever they want. Most important, though, I discovered a ton of new awesome music, thanks in no small part to the DJs at KEXP. So for the second year running, I’ve kept track (with the help of their handy iPhone app) of as much of it as I could, and am turning the results over to you. Here are 36 highlights, with the DJ who played them and when—plus my two cents (natch) about each:

The Drums, “I Can’t Save Your Life” (12:26 a.m. Jan. 8 by Michele Myers): The most grabbing dynamic of this song is the low/high exchange where the bendy guitar and reassuring bass line trade off carrying the melody, then the (fake?) horn goes up the scale. Little Barrie, “Dub It Over” (4:55 p.m. Feb. 9 by John Richards): Bouncy UK funk groove with pseudo-boy-band lyrics and a nice little effects-aided freak-out at the end. Arctic Monkeys, “R U Mine?” (10:59 a.m. April 9 by Cheryl Waters): Arctic Monkeys

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consistently refresh their classic-Brit-rockwith-a-drizzle-of-punk sound with new heavy guitar licks like this one, which always go down pop-smooth. Blue Sky Black Death & Nacho Picasso, “I’m a Greek God” (2:01 p.m. April 16 by Waters): One of the most “cloud”-y Nacho x BSBD jams, NP weaves some mythology into his tall smoker’s tales. “Shouda been a minotaur ’cause the boy’s a beast.” Alcoholic Faith Mission, “Alaska” (2:42 p.m May 3 by Kevin Cole): Not nearly as contrived as many stomping, harmony-based songs; the Danish band uses a slow tempo and layering techniques to build the charge. The Antlers, “No Windows” (1 p.m. May 21 by Waters): The repetitive melody wears a bit thin by the song’s end, but the basic atmospherics and watery whisper vocals make for great headphone music. Absolute Monarchs, “Bled Out” (11:07 a.m. May 24 by Waters): Joel Schneider’s yelled lyrics are the perfect complement to the dissonant guitar threads and super-basic drum pattern. Great rock track. Bobby Womack, “The Bravest Man in the Universe” (9:58 a.m. June 13 by Richards): Womack’s comeback album wasn’t all gravy, but its title track made great use of rhythm and his weathered croon. Friendly Fires, “Jump in the Pool” (8:55 a.m. June 15 by Richards): Euphoric electronic/rock jam with frantic percussive elements and placid vocals that would play perfectly on New Year’s Eve. T-Fire, “Will of the People” (6:12 p.m. July 10 by Darek Mazzone): Wah-pedal-and-horn funk to keep you moving. Mônica da Silva, “Walk on the Wild Side” (6:14 p.m. July 10 by Mazzone): Lou Reed’s happy little ditty was prime for bossa nova interpretation, and the Brazilian-American beauty makes it sing. Peaking Lights, “Dream Beat” (2:34 p.m. July 23 by Stevie Zoom): Wavy funk jam with sharp electronic interjections and delightful studio effects.

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A whistling, cute, guitar-driven track played in a high register to ensure a feel-good spirit. Washed Out, “New Theory” (12:07 a.m. Oct. 17 by Rose): Echoey electro-haze that kind of makes you want to speed down the Coast in a sexy little Miata with a mountain of cocaine riding shotgun. Kind of. Efterklang , “Sedna” (12:09 a.m. Oct. 17 by Rose): Ambient synths held in place expertly by the soft bass line and drum pats. Vocals fit in nicely as pleasant afterthought. Iamamiwhoami, “good worker” (4:33 p.m. Oct. 27 by a guest DJ): Contemporary ’80s-style synthesizer-and-drum-machine pop with a great build-up by a band with one of the hardest-to-pronounce names in existence. Point Juncture, WA , “Pearl of the Quarter” (5:20 p.m. Nov. 4 by Quilty 3000): This clever spin on Steely Dan’s original fits a somber-to-rocking instrumental around the melancholy narrative. Night Moves, “Country Queen” (5:35 p.m. Nov. 4 by Quilty 3000): The change-up at 1:17 might be the best heard this year, and it leads to some brilliant progressions. ILLFIGHTYOU, “92” (8:39 p.m. Nov. 4 by Larry Mizell, Jr.): Concrete-tough raps to fit the extra-hard piano cadence that fits the Tacoma trio’s state of mind. Cat Power, “Silent Machine” (2:30 p.m. Nov. 13 by Cole): I’m a relative Cat Power newb, so this is as good a place as any to begin to appreciate CP’s raw energy. The Joy Formidable, “Austere” (12:59 p.m. Nov. 13 by Waters): They get it rocking here in a fulfilling but not overly derivative kind of way, thanks in part to the use of unorthodox time signatures. Cody Chesnutt, “What Kind of Cool (Will We Think of Next)” (4:05 p.m. Nov. 26 by Zoom): A smooth take on classic soul (I know, but he does it well). Thoughtful lyrics. Neneh Cherry and the Thing , “Golden Heart (Nymph remix)” (9:47 p.m. Nov. 26 by DJ Riz): Wavering left/right channels and far-out beat-poetry-style percussion make for a fun listen in your car/headphones. Porcelain Raft, “Drifting In and Out” (9:25 a.m. Dec. 4 by Richards): The drunken synth lead and overall down-tempo approach feel surreal and unsteady, but Mauro Remiddi’s impressive soprano keeps it more in than out. E music@seattleweekly.com

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Future of the Left, “Sorry Dad, I Was Late for the Riots” (11:54 a.m. July 30 by Waters): A jagged, lyric-driven song with unhinged social commentary. Sounds like I was in a strange mood. Hounds of the Wild Hunt, “All the Men’s Kings” (3:02 p.m. Aug. 2 by Cole): Rarely done listenably, rock with string accompaniment is delivered properly here, with a killer vocal performance to boot. Autolux , “Subzero Fun” (11:25 a.m. Aug. 9 by Waters): Noise-pop with a winning light (vocals)/heavy (guitars, drums) dynamic. Santigold , “Disparate Youth” (4:14 p.m. Aug. 13 by Myers): One of the most accomplished melodies of the year. Santigold and producer Ricky Blaze crafted a hit through and through. Dan Deacon , “True Thrush” (5:11 Aug. 14 by Cole): Baltimore electronic artist Deacon has a charming song here, complete with complex rhythmic breakdowns and quirky audio drops. Poliça , “Amongster” (10:25 a.m. Aug. 23 by Waters): Channy Leaneagh’s Auto-Tuned vocals shimmer atop skittish drum sequences and a mounting ocean of sound until the song’s primal finale. Cocteau Twins, “Wax and Wane” (4 p.m. Aug. 26 by Quilty 3000): The old-school altScots’ rough melody as catchy as it is creepy. Radiation City, “Find It of Use” (11 a.m. Sept. 10 by DJ Shannon): Radiation City’s vintage recording techniques make their warm sound even more inviting. Their intricate songwriting is on full display here. Four Tet, “Pinnacles” (1:06 a.m. Sept. 22 by Alex): Bell-bottoms and moon boots— a savvy dance track from the mind of British producer Kieran Hebden. Zuco 103, “Brief Passions” (10:18 p.m. Oct. 12 by Myers): A hectic pop number that’s part ’90s R&B jam, part tropicália. Pupajim , “Signs” (10:58 a.m. Oct. 13 by Kid Hops): A heavy dub beat garnished with hypnotic falsetto chants that tie it together. Port St. Willow, “Amawalk” (9:21 a.m. Oct. 15 by Larry Rose): Bare in its presentation, “Amawalk” has the heart of a stripped-down “Ornament/The Last Wrongs” (Oceansize) that swells and becomes its own statement. David Wax Museum , “Will You Be Sleeping?” (10:29 a.m. Oct. 15 by Waters):

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Reve r b • Seat tle weekly • DECEMBER 19−25, 2012

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MUSIC

EVENTS

MUSIC NEW SLETTER The inside scoop on upcoming shows and the latest reviews.

EVENTS

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The 10 Best Seattle Albums of 2012 (In no particular order at all.)

Deep Sea Diver, History Speaks (2/24, self-

Dum Dum Girls, End of Daze (9/25, Sub

Pop, wearedumdumgirls.com): Dum Dum Girls did in a five-song EP what most bands can’t do in a full-length, what some novelists labor to accomplish in 500-page tomes—create a sincerely empathetic account of lost love, one that touches, burns, resonates, and then settles into a peaceful conclusion. It’s a satisfying full KüblerRoss cycle, with each stage represented by a darkly beautiful song—the arsenic-bitter “Mine Tonight”; the despairing “I Got Nothing”; the dazed, keening cover of Strawberry Switchblade’s “Trees and Flowers”; the stunningly mournful “Lord Knows,” among the year’s best singles; and the gratifying, fog-lifting “Season in Hell.” EKT

The Maldives, Muscle for the Wing (10/16, Spark & Shine, sparkandshine.com). While it lacks the calloused sear of 2009’s Listen to the Thunder, Muscle for the Wing affirms Jason Dodson’s status as the true visionary of this sprawling country-rock ensemble. The dueling guitars are hardly muted, but here Dodson’s vocals receive the spotlight they deserve. On Muscle, the Maldives simultaneously show more restraint, levity, and dexterity as they live up to their billing as The Band’s 21st-century progeny, proving themselves a far more dynamic outfit than their contemporaries in Seattle’s overly nostalgic beardwave movement. MIKE SEELY Shannon Stephens, Pull It Together (5/22,

Asthmatic Kitty, shannonstephens.com): “I turned 35 and all of a sudden I didn’t have the energy to give a shit what people thought about me anymore,” says singer/songwriter Shannon Stephens when probed about this, her third solo release. Indeed, Stephens has found new confidence here; her serene voice, when merged with contributions from her studio band (including Jeff Fielder, labelmate DM Stith, and Will Oldham), is often striking. “Faces Like Ours” contrasts delicate piano work, billowy pedal steel, and resonant harmonies (hers and Oldham’s) with bold lyrics on white privilege. It’s Stephens’ guiding instinct to include such a track that makes Together a departure from her debut, and new resolve runs like an electric current through it. GWENDOLYN ELLIOTT

Nacho Picasso, Exalted (5/28, selfreleased): Villainous MC Nacho Picasso released three full-lengths this year (Lord of the Fly and Exalted with production team Blue Sky Black Death, Black Narcissus on his own), so what sets this one apart? Nacho’s flow has been pretty consistent throughout his run, but BSBD turned out perhaps its most dynamic record this time around, popping off the Bandcamp page and lending itself to Nacho’s clever plot games. Beats like “Bloody Murder,” “Haile Selassie,” “Kickin Out Windows,” and “The Gods Don’t Favor You” are especially hard-driving vehicles, on which Nacho works his semi-sarcastic sleazebag routine and pushes himself to spit some of his most entertaining bars to date. TODD HAMM

Damien Jurado, Maraqopa (2/21, Secretly

Canadian, damienjurado.com): Jurado says this is the first Damien Jurado album he actually likes—the first time he made the kind of album he wanted to make, not the kind he thought could get him written up in songwriting magazines. We’re not sure we fully believe him. But we’re sure that Maraqopa does not adhere to the singer/ songwriter strictures of record. Jurado employs his talents in the service of psychedelia, jam, and expansive explorations of sound that take him out of the cozy indieacoustic safe zone that the scene he comes from needs to flee. This is not the end of the trip. And even if Maraqopa is Jurado’s best album to date, he has not likely yet made the album for which he will be remembered.

THEESatisfaction , awE naturalE (5/27, Sub Pop, theesatisfaction.blogspot.com): THEESatisfaction recently toured with frequent collaborators OCnotes, Erik Blood, and Shabazz Palaces, and the duo documented the trip with photos they posted on their website—a series of candid, honest moments frozen in time, curiosities, colorful compositions, and the occasional tourist snapshot. As a whole they constitute a minor (and decidedly understated) work of art that reinforces the astounding precociousness of Stasia Irons and Catherine Harris-White. The ladies apply the same casual brilliance to their Sub Pop debut, an early release not soon to be forgotten. KEEGAN HAMILTON

CHRIS KORNELIS

Country Lips, Touched (4/8, self-released,

Father John Misty, Fear Fun (5/1, Sub

countrylips.com): Did anybody play more local gigs this year than Country Lips? It seems like these guys rocked the shit out of every bar, club, tavern, and dirty dive in town at least twice. Hell, they even headlined a wedding or two (thanks, guys). The boys do a lovely version of Willie Nelson’s “On the Road Again,” but it’s as if they never leave King County. It’s only a matter of time until the rest of the world is introduced to the Lips’ rollicking live show, but in the meantime the band’s stellar debut, Touched, will have to suffice. KH

Erik Blood , Touch Screens (8/7, self-

released, erikblood.com): Those who follow local music with any regularity probably

Pop, fatherjohnmisty.com): It is by no means a dis to the Lumineers, but if you are having sex to their record, you are most likely doing it wrong. Top-40 folk at its best is a soundtrack for missionary position “lovemaking” with too much eye contact. At its worst, it’s for doe-eyed tweens whose idea of male genitals are still defined by Ken dolls. Not all music has to sock you in the nether regions, of course, but isn’t it so much better when it does? Father John Misty’s Fear Fun injects this now-conventional sound with seedy, Southern California-in-the-’70s sex, drugs, and rock ’n’ roll for a good-time record full of psychedelics, lust, and social consciousness. MA’CHELL DUMA LAVASSAR E music@seattleweekly.com

Reve r b • Seattle weekly • DECEMBER 19−25, 2012

released, thedeepseadiver.com): Between her day jobs playing lead guitar for Beck and the Shins, it took Jessica Dobson a while to complete the debut full-length from Deep Sea Diver, her band with her husband and drummer Peter Mansen. But when History Speaks was finally released, it quickly did its job, establishing Dobson as a musical force much more than just a backing-band guitarist for hire. From the peppy pop melody of “You Go Running” to the sweeping melodrama of “NWO,” History Speaks showcases Dobson’s dynamic songwriting, her pristine guitar playing, her uniquely pliable vocals—in short, her powerful potency as a fearless frontwoman. ERIN K. THOMPSON

J CLIFFORD PHOTOGRAPHY

The Country Lips take the statue for best band pic, too.

know Touch Screens as “that album about porn.” Smut is indeed Erik Blood’s thematic touchstone, but that’s not why his album is one of the year’s best. Credit instead goes to his deft songwriting and production. Touch Screens bridges a range of styles—icy synthrock, neo-psychedelia, even krautrock on standout track “Today’s Lover”—and it’s Blood’s skill behind the boards that makes it cohere. Dense and lush but never busy, this is understatedly brilliant work from Seattle’s most sought-after producer. ANDREW GOSPE

NEW YEAR’S EVE GUIDE All events take place on December 31 unless otherwise noted. Listings compiled by SW ad department

88 Keys Dueling Piano & Sports Bar

88 Keys thrives on crowd participation and encourages you to challenge your piano man with song requests, cheers, jeers and jokes. Food and drink specials complement the fun this New Year’s Eve. 206.839.1300. PIONEER SQUARE

Center for Spiritual Living

Rev. Kathianne Lewis’ service, themed “Shining Brightly,” will focus on intention setting, celebration and spiritual grounding for your New Year. 2013 could be the year you finally evoke the change you’ve envisioned for years. 7-8p. Free. 206.527.8801. UNIVERSITY VILLAGE

Central Cinema

Central Cinema will be showcasing a carefully curated selection of the best (and WORST) music videos which they invite you, the audience, to sing along to. 9:30p. $12 ADV; $14 DOS. 206.686.6684. CENTRAL DISTRICT

Century Ballroom

Century Ballroom, proper, will feature East Meets West Salsa: DJ Mar Y Soul & DJ Yambu’s Vinyl Stylings ($30). The Rainbow Room will showcase a mix of social dance music geared towards the GLBTQ community and friends ($25). Black & white attire encouraged. 21+. 206.324.7263. CAPITOL HILL

Club Sapphire

Wear your sexiest clothing and flaunt your style. It will be a night to explore your boundaries and still behave (at least a little). Doors at 7p. Register for the party online. 206.451.7398 TACOMA

Reve r b • Seat tle weekly • DECEMBER 19−25, 2012

The Grill On Broadway

Ever notice that many New Year’s Eve parties end up being a total drag? At The Grill on Broadway, the party starts as a total drag and, honey, that’s a wonderful thing! In addition to some of Seattle’s sassiest and most talented drag divas performing, there will be a DJ spinning, and drink and food specials all throughout the night. 7p-2a. No cover. 206.328.7000. CAPITOL HILL

In the Red Wine Bar

Little Red Hen

Green Lake’s favorite honky tonk hideout presents one of their favorites, Knut Bell & The Blue Collars, on stage for a hootin’, hollerin’ NYE. A mere $10 cover gets you in to see the show and includes party favors, a glass of champagne at midnight and all the stompin’ your boots can handle. Wranglers optional. 206.522.1168. GREEN LAKE

Lunchbox Laboratory

Weird science never tasted so good! NYE specials include $19.99 for 2 Burger Experiments & 2 glasses of champagne, as well as $4 champagne specials (make it an Astronaut Mimosa with the addition of Tang!) all night. Complimentary party favors and champagne toast at midnight for all. 206.621.1090. SOUTH LAKE UNION. 425.505.2676. BELLEVUE

Maximilien in the Market

Bonjour 2013! As if the scrumptious multi-course supper wasn’t enough, the live performance of European cabaret music by Rouge will leave you feeling tres magnifique. $94 per person ($115 with wine pairing) includes dinner and the live show. No extra charge for the incomparably lovely view. 206.682.7270. PIKE PLACE MARKET

Neighborhood Grills

Prefer to keep your celebration close to home? No matter where you live, there’s a Neighborhood Grill waiting to serve you. On NYE each will feature a special NYE dinner menu, live music, party favors and a champagne toast at midnight. Taking reservations for groups large and small. 206.729.6179 GREENLAKE. 206.957.7777 EASTLAKE. 425.457.7905 CROSSROADS

Neptune Theatre

As the saying goes, the future is now. As attendees at the Neptune’s NYE party will discover, the future is indeed now… and there are f#%king lazers everywhere! In addition to lazer-palooza, the stage will be rocked by the Seattle-based, darlings of KEXP, Fresh Espresso, Grynch, Keyboard Kid & Metal Chocolates. Doors at 8p; show at 9p. $20 + fees. 21+. 877.STG-4TIX. UNIVERSITY DISTRICT

Parlor Live Comedy Club

On NYE, In the Red will be associated with nothing but excess. Entry to their party includes small bites, two glasses of wine from their carefully selected list and a champagne toast at midnight. 206.420.8992. PHINNEY RIDGE

Jon Reep headlines the 4th Annual NYE Comedy Classic. Tickets include all the offerings of Parlor’s New Year’s Eve 2013: comedy extravaganza, DJ, dancing and a champagne toast at midnight. Doors at 6p. GA and VIP Seating available. $50 and up. 21+. 425.289.7000. BELLEVUE

The INDULGENCE NYE Bash at EMP

Paramount Theatre

The biggest New Year’s Eve Bash in the Northwest. It’s true! Check our math: Guests = 3,000; square footage of party space = 140,000; bars = 25; performance stages = 3 (Brand X!, You Spin Me Right Round 80’s Party Mix and MOViN’ 92.5 Party Stage); exclusive VIP areas = 2; comedy lounge = 1; sundry perks = innumerable Tickets start at $59. Doors at 8p. 21+. 206.297.1738. SEATTLE CENTER

Jazz Alley

Proudly welcoming back, by popular demand, the Grammy-winning master Conguero, Poncho Sanchez and his Latin Jazz Band. There are four different package levels to choose from for NYE. ($60.50-$175.50). 206.441.9729 DOWNTOWN

Beats Antique comes to the historic Paramount Theatre this NYE in celebration of their fourth full-length album, Elektrafone. They will be joined onstage by Y La Bamba and Lynx. Doors at 7:30p; show at 8:30p. Tickets $36.25 and up; 877.STG4TIX. 21+. DOWNTOWN

Seattle Center

Winterfest continues with a New Year’s Eve party featuring The Rhythm Nation. From 8:15-11:45p in the Armory (formerly the Center House). After the show concludes, head outside for an incomparable view of the fireworks display from the Space Needle. Free. All ages. 206.684.7200. LOWER QUEEN ANNE

Reve r b • Seattle weekly • DECEMBER 19−25, 2012

Reve r b • Seat tle weekly • DECEMBER 19−25, 2012

See Sound Lounge

Performances by Wesley Holmes, Stereo Medics, Gene Lee, Triple Nine will keep the beat all night long. Countless extras (red carpet photos, broadcasts of the countdown to the Space Needle fireworks accompanied by a balloon drop and champagne toast at midnight). $30 ADV; $40 DOS. Table package reservations available. Call for details. 206.979.3733. BELLTOWN

Showbox at the Market

In 2011, KEXP listeners voted Pickwick’s ‘Myths’ #9 record of the year. The band is currently finishing up work on their debut LP and writing new material they’ll likely preview. Their honored company this NYE includes Radiation City and Tomten. Doors at 8p; show at 9p. $21.50 ADV; $25 DOS. 21+. DOWNTOWN

Tia Lou’s

Def Jam’s recording superstar J HOLIDAY comes to Tia Lou’s on NYE to perform his hits “Bed” and “Suffocate” along with other jams live with special guests. Amir Azer (PAK PROS) hosts the evening that will also include DJs spinning in two rooms, confetti drop and many more surprises. 8p-2a. $30 ADV. Call for reservations. 206.733.8226. BELLTOWN

Tractor Tavern

It’s time to fly the finger at the old year and ring in the new one with Supersuckers. Prepare yourself for the most awesome show of NYE featuring the word “suck” in the headline.

NEW YEAR’S EVE GUIDE All events take place on December 31 unless otherwise noted. Listings compiled by SW ad department

9:30p. $25 online or at Sonic Boom Records. 21+. 206.789.2599. BALLARD

Triple Door – Main Stage

The Dudley Manlove Quartet wows crowds with a unique mixture of tunes from the Swinging ‘60s, high-energy ‘70s pop and disco hits, romantic ‘80s synth-pop and smooth-asscotch lounge standards. Choose from the $100 dinner package which includes the 7p show (all ages), or go for the $70 dessert packages good at the 10:30p show (21+). 206.838.4333. DOWNTOWN

Tulalip Resort Casino Ampitheater

Spend NYE poolside in a tropical resort! At least you’ll feel that way upon entering Tulalip Resort’s sprawling indoor Oasis Pool room. The bash promises entertainment by live DJs, dancing, appetizers, party favors and a sparkling wine toast at midnight. 9p-1a. $100 per person (includes service charge & tax). 360.716.6888. MARYSVILLE

Volterra - Ballard & Kirkland

Ring in 2013 at Volterra with an inspired, prix-fixe Tuscan menu, crafted by Chef Don Curtiss. Reservations for one of three seatings recommended. All guests will take home a jar of Volterra’s famous Fennel Salt as a party favor to help spice up 2013. 206.789.5100. BALLARD 425.202.7201 KIRKLAND

Great Food • Great Drinks • Great People • Daily Specials 32 HD Flatscreen TV’s Sports Packages (including soccer) Across from Century Link Field

SEATTLE

Voted #1 - Seattle’s Best Sport’s Bar GO HAWKS! - $1 off your drink when you mention this ad (2012 away games only)

Sports Bar & Grill • 538 1st Ave • Seattle WA 98104 • 206-654-8070

Glamour and Glitz

~ NEW YEAR’S EVE EVENT ~ Monday, December 31, Doors open @ 7 p.m. Tacoma, WA Dinner- Live Music - No Host Bar

Club Sapphire Modern Day Swinging at its finest. Come see what it’s all about. Please call for your reservation.

www.thesapphire.net

| 206.451.7398

Reve r b • Seattle weekly • DECEMBER 19−25, 2012

dinner & show

mainstage WED/DECEMBER 19 - THU/DECEMBER 27 • SHOW TIMES VARY

land of the sweets: the burlesque nutcracker FRI/DECEMBER 28 • 8PM

the bobs after christmas holiday show SAT/DECEMBER 29 • 8PM & SUN/DECEMBER 30 • 7:30PM

leroy bell and his only friends MON/DECEMBER 31 • 7PM & 10:30PM

new years eve with the dudley manlove quartet THU/JANUARY 3 • 7PM // FRI/JANUARY 4 & SAT/JANUARY 5 • 7PM & 10PM THE CAN CAN PRESENTS

elvis alive with vince mira SUN/JANUARY 6 • 7:30PM

barbie anaka

next • 1/10 red molly w/ nathaniel talbot • 1/11 left hand smoke • 1/12 ian mcferon and anna coogan • 1/13 new heights w/ andie case • 1/14 chelsea wolfe w/ king dude • 1/16 80’s invasion • 1/18 vagabond opera • 1/19 pasatempo rebetika • 1/20 claire lynch • 1/22 & 1/23 mingus dynasty • 1/25 school of rock: stop making sense • 1/26 the big gig • 1/27 tristan prettyman • 1/29 keiko matsui • 1/31 paul kelly • 2/1 kristen ward • 2/6 snake a chinese new year celebration • 2/8 nicki bluhm & the gramblers w/ brothers comatose • 2/9 shawn mullins w/ max gomez • 2/11 hot tuna acoustic • 2/13 victor wooten • 2/14 - 2/16 the atomic bombshells “j’adore! a burlesque valentine” • 2/19 habib koite and eric bibb – brothers in bamako

happy hour every day •12/19closedforaprivateeventuntil7:30pm//hardcoretet•12/20thionediop • 12/21 smoke and honey // ranger and the re-arrangers• 12/22 liam fitzgerald and the rainieros • 12/23 janglewagon • 12/24 free funk union featuring hosts: d’vonne lewis and adam kessler • 12/26 istvan and farko // chris riffle TO ENSURE THE BEST EXPERIENCE · PLEASE ARRIVE EARLY DOORS OPEN 1.5 HOURS PRIOR TO FIRST SHOW · ALL-AGES (BEFORE 9:30PM)

thetripledoor.net

216 UNION STREET, SEATTLE · 206.838.4333

the»weekly»wire wed/12/19 FILM

An Angel Gets His Wings

RKO PICTURES

Times are tough in Frank Capra’s 1946 Christmas classic It’s a Wonderful Life. Banks are failing. People are losing their homes. Veterans are returning from a bloody war abroad. Families are falling apart. And all these stresses converge during the holidays, when there may not even be enough money in the household to buy any presents. Sound familiar? In the GI’s 42nd annual screening of this seasonal favorite, the distressed town of Bedford Falls could today be Anytown, U.S.A., and beleaguered banker James Stewart could be any small businessman struggling to remain solvent. If It’s a Wonderful Life is arguably the best Christmas movie ever made, that’s because it’s certainly one of the most depressing. Our suicidal hero is given a future vision—courtesy of a visiting angel—of bankruptcy, death, poverty, and evil, unfettered capitalism (hello, Lionel Barrymore). Even his wife (Donna Reed) ends up a spinster in the alternate universe of Pottersville. Before the inevitable tear-swelling plot reversal, the movie is 100 percent grim. Yet amazingly, 66 years later, it preserves the power to inspire hope for better days ahead. (Through Dec. 27.) Grand Illusion, 1403 N.E. 50th St., 523-3935, grandillusion cinema.org. $5–$8. 6 & 8:30 p.m. BRIAN MILLER

COMEDY

Self-Surgery

It’s about 99 percent certain that tonight’s and Friday’s performances by Louis CK are sold out. Still, if there’s one stand-up comic in America today who’d justify your shameless begging on the sidewalk, it’s him. The guy started in the mid-’80s as a writer and performer of fairly routine jokes. Then, after abbreviating his surname (from Szekely), he began to burrow deeply into his personal life—dating, balding, marriage, divorce, newfound wealth, bad sex, parenthood, etc. Nothing was out of bounds, and his career took off. Yet one shouldn’t mistake his self-lacerating candor for ordinary oversharing. Louis isn’t confessing so much as dissecting. His self-disgust is merely the sharp edge of the scalpel he uses to excise the disgusting cancers of our broader culture. Everything he finds wrong about himself—or so he says, for comic effect—is what we ought to recognize

STAGE

Younger Brothers

If you spent part of your younger days alone in the dark watching The Matrix and Hong Kong action movies, or even if you didn’t, Nanda may seem awfully familiar. The self-described “Acrobaticalist Ninja Theater” quartet—originally from Port Townsend, now based in Portland—has been honing its martial arts/breakdance/gymnastics/juggling/joke-cracking skills on the festival circuit, from the Moisture Festival to Bumbershoot. In the revised version of The Jacket, about four adventurers searching for a magical coat that bestows superhuman powers, are elements of vaudeville, parkour, mime, capoeira, “kung faux” (sorry!), and plenty of sight gags for the kids. Parents will appreciate the humorous asides and the evident debt to the Flying Karamazov Brothers, who have praised Nanda’s act. Kirkland Performance Center, 350 Kirkland Ave., 425-893-9900, kpcenter.org and nandatown.com. $20–$65. 7:30 p.m. (Also: 8 p.m. Sat.) SANDRA KURTZ

sun/12/23 FOOTBALL

A Welcome Bump

Even without their magnetic young quarterbacks, tonight’s 49ers/Seahawks matchup would be the game to watch: playoff-primed division rivals playing their penultimate regular-season game in the noisily forbidding Clink. And then there are the QBs. After early-season starts that saw him bailing from the pocket like a Jefferson nickel, rookie Russell Wilson is proving to be the leader Pete Carroll insisted he was when he made him the starter over the higher-paid Matt Flynn. From San Fran, Colin Kaepernick comes with even more drama, replacing a winning if not exciting Alex Smith five weeks ago to the shock of a re-energized Niners Nation. All this makes for great TV, and the NFL announced last week it was moving the game to this evening, bumping the Jets and Chargers from the marquee time slot. That’s a mixed blessing for people going to the game, as it will surely mean even colder nighttime temperatures to bear with the December rain. But in a city always so insecure about its prosports cred, it’s good to feel wanted. CenturyLink Field, 800 Occidental Ave. S., seahawks. com. $65–$425. 5:20 p.m. DANIEL PERSON

Seat tle weekly • DECEM BER 19−25, 2012

thurs/12/20

fri/12/21

ART CREDIT

in ourselves: pettiness, vanity, selfishness, and sanctimony. Fresh off hosting SNL, on hiatus after the third acclaimed season of Louie on FX, Louis is taping his current tour for an HBO special. Which, in truth, is probably the only way you’ll see this show. The Paramount, 911 Pine St., 682-1414, stgpresents.org. $45. 6 p.m. (Also: 7 p.m. Fri.) BRIAN MILLER

Seattle weekly • DECEM BER 19−25, 2012

24 Brand: Stella Artois “Holiday” Item #: PSA201210383 Job/Order #:245718

Closing Date: 11/20/12 QC: CS

Publication: Seattle Weekly

Trim: 9.83" x 11.25" Bleed: none Live: 9.33" x 10.75"

PA AD AM

AE CD

GIMME CULTURE!

arts»Performance Stage OPENINGS & EVENTS

AIN’T MISBEHAVIN’ Harlem’s hot heyday is recreated in

this revue. Dimitriou’s Jazz Alley, 2033 Sixth Ave., 441-9729, jazzalley.com. $32.50. 7:30 p.m. Thurs., Dec. 20–Sun., Dec. 23; also 9:30 p.m. Sat., Dec. 22. THE CHRISTMAS TRUCE A commemoration of the famous WWI spontaneous cease-fire, with songs, readings, and prayers. Woodland Park Community of Christ, 5555 Phinney Ave. N., 782-7114. Free. 7 p.m. Mon., Dec. 24. LOUIS CK SEE THE WIRE, PAGE 23. HE SEES YOU WHEN YOU’RE SLEEPING Blood Squad mashes up Christmas and slasher movies, one night only. Balagan Theatre, 1117 E. Pike St., 800-838-3006, balagan theatre.org. $10. 8 p.m. Sat., Dec. 22. THE JACKET SEE THE WIRE, PAGE 23.

•

CURRENT RUNS

THE BEST CHRISTMAS PAGEANT EVER/THE SANTALAND DIARIES Xmas favorites running in

repertory through Dec. 24. See seattlepublictheater.org for exact schedule. Seattle Public Theater at the Bathhouse, 7312 W. Green Lake Ave. N. BLACK NATIVITY The annual gospel celebration. The Moore Theatre, 1932 Second Ave., 877-784-4849, stg presents.org. $22.50–$37.50. 7:30 p.m. Tues.–Fri., 2 & 7:30 p.m. Sat.–Sun. Ends Dec. 23. A CHILD’S CHRISTMAS IN WALES Dylan Thomas’ reminiscence adapted for the stage. Stone Soup Downstage, 4029 Stone Way, 800-838-3006. $18–$20. 7:30 p.m. Fri.–Sat., 2 p.m. Sat.–Sun., plus more matinees Xmas weekend. Ends Dec. 24. See stonesoup theatre.org for schedule.

• A CHRISTMAS CAROL

SCAN

Send events to stage@seattleweekly.com, dance@seattleweekly.com, or classical@seattleweekly.com See seattleweekly.com for full listings. = Recommended

•

LAND OF THE SWEETS: THE BURLESQUE NUTCRACKER The ballet gets a bawdy makeover. The

Triple Door, 216 Union St., 838-4333, landofthesweets.com. $28–$45. Runs Tues.–Sun. plus Xmas Eve; see thetriple door.net for exact schedule. Ends Dec. 27. OWEN MEANY’S CHRISTMAS PAGEANT John Irving’s holiday favorite. Center House Theatre, Seattle Center, 216-0833. $23–$45. See book-it.org for exact schedule. Ends Dec. 23. SHERLOCK HOLMES AND THE CASE OF THE CHRISTMAS CAROL John Longenbaugh’s reflective

holiday tale interpolates the characters of Scrooge and Holmes, the latter now a lonely misanthrope who receives three Christmas Eve visitors with a mystery to solve. As Holmes, Terry Edward Moore has a gift for smugness, as the famed detective delivers all his quips with eyes in a permanent half-roll, nose lifted to the sky. Holmes’ bahhumbug-ery is nicely countered by Stephen Grenley’s Dr. Watson. TERRA SULLIVAN Taproot Theatre, 204 N. 85th St., 781-9707, taproottheatre.org. $22–$37. 7:30 p.m. Wed.– Thurs., 8 p.m. Fri., 2 & 8 p.m. Sat. Ends Dec. 29. SLEEPING BEAUTY AND THE PEA The Fremont Players’ annual British panto: fairy-tale spectacle, saucy humor, audience participation, and more. Hale’s Palladium, 4301 Leary Way N.W., 800-838-3006, brownpapertickets.com. $6–$12. 4 & 7:30 p.m. Sat., 1 & 4 p.m. Sun. Ends Jan. 13. TEATRO ZINZANNI: RETURN TO PARADISE Their dinner cabaret is given a World’s Fair theme, set right here in 1962 Seattle. Teatro ZinZanni, 222 Mercer St., 8020015. $106 and up. Runs Thurs.–Sun. through Jan. 27; see dreams.zinzanni.org for exact schedule. UNCLE MIKE RUINS CHRISTMAS Wing-It crushes all that is good about the holidays under the stinky work boot of unwanted houseguest Uncle Mike. From the audience’s childhood memories, the improv troupe concocts a pageant of dick jokes, murder scenes, alcoholic outbursts, and child-marriage scenarios. TERRA SULLIVAN Wing-It Productions, 5510 University Way N.E., 781-3879, wingit presents.com. $12–$15. Midnight:30 Sat. Ends Dec. 22. THE WINTER WONDERETTES Celebrate Christmas 1968 with this girl group. ArtsWest, 4711 California Ave. S.W., 938-0339, artswest.org. $17–$36.50. 7:30 p.m. Wed.–Sat., 3 p.m. Sat.–Sun. Ends Dec. 30. WISEMEN Rosenstock Productions’ sendup of the Nativity story. ACT Theatre, 700 Union St., 292-7676, act theatre.org. $20–$25. 8 p.m. Thurs.-Sat. Ends Dec. 22. THE WIZARD OF OZ A woman visits a foreign land and kills the first person she sees, then teams with three strangers to kill more. Seattle Children’s Theatre, Seattle Center, 441-3322. $20–$36. Runs Thurs.–Sun., plus Wed. over the holidays; see sct.org for exact schedule. Ends Jan. 6.

•

Dance

INTERNATIONAL BALLET THEATRE: NUTCRACKER

With Vera Altunina’s choreography. Meydenbauer Center, 11100 N.E. Sixth St., Bellevue, 800-838-3006. $25–$50. Runs Wed.–Sun.; see ibtbellevue.org for schedule. Ends Dec. 23.

• PACIFIC NORTHWEST BALLET: NUTCRACKER

PNB’s production, with choreography by Kent Stowell and set designs by Maurice Sendak, pulls out just about every theatrical trick in the book, mixes them with nonstop dancing, and wraps them all up in Tchaikovsky’s beautiful score. SANDRA KURTZ McCaw Hall, Seattle Center, 4412424. $25–$130. Performances run near daily through Dec. 29, see pnb.org for exact schedule.

Classical, Etc.

SEATTLE MEN’S CHORUS For their holiday extrava-

gaynza, music evoking warmer climes. Benaroya Hall, 200 University St., 388-1400. $27–$77. See flyinghouse.org for exact schedule. Ends Dec. 22. A FESTIVAL OF LESSONS AND CAROLS The Northwest Boychoir’s annual tour, with performances through Dec. 23. See nwchoirs.org for full info. MARK SALMAN Reminiscences of Horowitz, plus music, from this pianist. Sherman Clay Studio, 1624 Fourth Ave., 267-7580, shermanclay.com. Free, but call to make reservations. 7:30 p.m. Fri., Dec. 21. DUKE ELLINGTON’S SACRED MUSIC Earshot Jazz presents the Seattle Repertory Jazz Orchestra. Town Hall, 1119 Eighth Ave., 652-4255, earshotjazz.org. $15–$34. 7:30 p.m. Sat., Dec. 22. MESSIAH SING- AND PLAY-ALONG Karen P. Thomas conducts. University Unitarian Church, 6556 35th Ave. N.E., 525-8400, uuchurch.org. $13–$18. 7 p.m. Wed., Dec. 26.

ARTS DIRECTORY

THEATER

BLACK NATIVITY

Moore Theatre Through December 23

A Seattle holiday tradition continues in its 3rd year at the historic Moore Theatre. This year’s gospel song play by noted American poet and novelist Langston Hughes features special guest gospel and R & B star BeBe Winans for performances from December 21 to December 23 only. 7:30p nightly. 2p weekend matinees. 877.784.4849. $32.50 and up.

www.stgpresents.org

CIRRCUMBENDIBUS: GEEK OUT Erickson Theatre December 28 & 29

Geek out with Book-It! At long last, Book-It delves into the world of Science Fiction, Fantasy, Comic Books, and Graphic Novels in Volume III of Circumbendibus. Join in an unabashed celebration of all things Geek that brings entirely new worlds and literary media to life onstage. 206.216.0833. $10.

www.book-it.org/circumbendibus

RETURN TO PARADISE Teatro ZinZanni Through January 27

DUKE ELLINGTON’S SACRED MUSIC

Earshot Jazz - Town Hall Seattle Saturday, December 22

Ellington’s wonderful “Sacred Music” is both serious and swinging. It is a reverent and hip body of jazz composition, written late in his career, for jazz big band, vocal and instrumental soloists, gospel choir, and tap dancers. Featuring: Seattle Repertory Jazz Orchestra with guest vocal soloists Everett Greene & Nichol Veneé Eskridge and special guest, tap-dancer Alex Dugdale. 7:30p. 800.838.3006. $15-34.

www.earshot.org

VISUAL ARTS CELEBRATION!

Women Painters of WA Gallery Columbia Center, Suite 310 January 8 - February 22

A juried exhibition showcasing the diverse talents of more than 60 members of the organization from all across Washington State. The award-winning artists featured continue an 82-year legacy of excellence recognized in association with the organization’s name in the Cornerstone of the Seattle Art Museum. Reception: January 10 from 11a-2p. Gallery Hours: Monday-Friday from 11a-4p. 206.624.0543. Free.

www.womenpainters.com

Blast off in Teatro ZinZanni’s time machine and travel GREAT ART BY back to hippest party of the 1962 Seattle World’s GREAT WOMEN Fair. Diva Gracie Hansen of Paradise ZinZanni cordially invites you back in time to an exclusive Seattle Art Museum evening where Elvis Presley rocks the house, Jimi Through February 17 Hendrix jams with the band and Bruce Lee shows off Elles: Women Artists from the Centre Pompidou, all his moves. 206-802-0015. $106 & up. Paris features more than 130 artworks by 75 www.dreams.zinzanni.org pioneering women artists from 1909 to 2007 offering a fresh perspective on a history of modern and contemporary art (thru Jan 13, 2013). In response to Elles:Pompidou, also on view is Elles: SAM—Singular Works by Seminal Women Artists, BARRY MANILOW a series of works by women in SAM’s modern ShoWare Center Kent and contemporary galleries (thru Feb 17, 2013). Friday, January 11 Tuesday-Sunday. 206.654.3100. $12-$23. Barry Manilow stars in, PANDORA Unforgettable www.seattleartmuseum.org/elles Moments of Love on Ice. Performing more than 20 of his greatest hits LIVE on stage while Olympic medalists skate on ice. One night only, taped for an APOCALYPSE FILM NBC audience, with Nancy Kerrigan, Ben Agosto, Elvis Stojko and more! 253.856.6999. $49.50-$125. FESTIVAL!

MUSICAL PERFORMANCE

SPECIAL EVENT

www.showarecenter.com

CINDERELLA

SIFF Cinema Uptown Through December 20

Seattle Opera - McCaw Hall January 12 - 26

A uniquely Italian retelling of the ultimate rags-toriches story from Rossini, the composer of “The Barber of Seville.” Clever staging and colorful costumes highlight this new-to-Seattle production. 206.389.7676. $25-$215.

Prepare for the anticipated December 21st apocalypse with a big screen celebration of all the methods by which mankind is doomed…DOOMED! So what form will the apocalypse take? Virus? Nuclear attack? Zombies? Primates? Kevin Costner? Celebrate the end of it all with a special Science on Screen debunking of the film 2012 on 12.20.12. 206.324.9996. $5-$10.

www.seattleopera.org

www.siff.net

INTERESTED IN ADVERTISING ON THIS PAGE? EMAIL US AT GIMMECULTURE@SEATTLEWEEKLY.COM or CALL 206.467.4341

Seat tle weekly • DECEM BER 19−25, 2012

A satisfying take on Scrooge’s redemption. I don’t think I’ve ever seen it done as well as by Jeff Steitzer, whose every “Bah, humbug” bears the sting of a real tongue-lashing. (R. Hamilton Wright alternates in the role.) And if that isn’t T H I S CO D E enough to melt your heart, TO DOWNLOAD THE FREE watch Galen Joseph Osier’s SEATTLE WEEKLY Bob Cratchit grieve for his IPHONE/ANDROID APP lost son, Tiny Tim. KEVIN FOR MORE EVENTS OR VISIT PHINNEY ACT Theatre, 700 seattleweekly.com Union St., 292-7676. $27–$55. Runs near daily; see act theatre.org. for exact schedule. Ends Dec. 30. THE DINA MARTINA CHRISTMAS SHOW The incomparable entertaineress is back with an all-new show and Chris Jeffries on the keyboard. Re-bar, 1114 Howell St., 800-838-3006. $20–$25. Runs Thurs.–Sun. to start, oftener as the holidays approach; see brownpapertickets.com for exact schedule. Ends Dec. 31. ELF: THE MUSICAL There’s a moral at the juicy nougat core of this show (based on the hit 2003 film), but it’s so papered over with Christmas wrap, holiday cheer, and bustling Broadway glitz that any message becomes ancillary. Buddy (Matt Owen) is raised as an elf accidentally; once he learns he’s human, Santa sets him out to find his birth dad in New York, only to discover that his Papa (Allen Fitzpatrick) doesn’t believe in Santa and has no Christmas spirit. Hilarity and hijinks ensue—and nearly as much cheese as cheer—abetted by a busy and tuneful score. KEVIN PHINNEY 5th Avenue Theatre, 1308 Fifth Ave., 625-1900. $15–$75. Runs near daily through Dec. 21; see 5thavenue.org for exact schedule. Ends Dec. 21. HAM FOR THE HOLIDAYS: HAM-AGEDDON The annual sketch/music campfest from Dos Fallopia (Lisa Koch & Peggy Platt). Theater Off Jackson, 409 Seventh Ave. S., 800-838-3006, heylisa.com. $15–$35. 7:30 p.m. Wed.–Sun., 3 p.m. Sat.–Sun. Ends Dec. 30. HOMO FOR THE HOLIDAYS Make the yuletide gay with this drag cabaret. Oddfellows Hall, 915 E. Pike St., 800838-3006, brownpapertickets.com. $20–$25. 7 & 10 p.m. Fri.–Sat. plus Dec. 23 & 24. Ends Dec. 24. A(N IMPROVISED) CHRISTMAS CAROL Dickens gets the Mad Libs treatment. Market Theater, 1428 Post Alley, 587-2414, unexpectedproductions.org. $5–$15. 8:30 p.m. Thurs.–Sat, 7 p.m. Sun. Ends Dec. 30.

ACT’s rival Dickens production. Seattle Rep, Seattle Center, 443-2222. Runs 7:30 p.m. Wed.–Sun. plus lots of matinees; see seattlerep.org for exact schedule. Ends Dec. 23. IT’S YOUR WONDERFUL LIFE Wing-It improvises your life story, Capra-style. Wing-It Productions, 5510 University Way N.E., 781-3879, wingitproductions.com. $12–$15. 8 p.m. Thurs.–Fri., 2 p.m. Sat. Ends Dec. 22.

B Y G AV I N B O R C H E R T

INSPECTING CAROL Daniel Sullivan’s comedy riffs on

Seattle weekly • DECEM BER 19−25, 2012

‘tis the

SEASON OF GAME.

BELLEVUE SQUARE

26 weekly.indd 1

11/15/12 2:37 PM

A SAM Membe rship makes a great g ift! Free ad mis

sion, discoun ts & mo re. Get one online, at SAM SHOP 206.654 or call .3210

Seat tle weekly • DECEM BER 19−25, 2012

Seattle weekly • DECEM BER 19−25, 2012

PROCRASTINATOR PAGES The Perfect NW Wine

Bainbridge Organic Distillers

Looking for the perfect pairing or bottle of wine to take to the holiday soiree? Ask the wine experts at Madrona’s Bottlehouse for a hand-curated recommendation from around the Pacific Northwest. Or stocking-stuff with their fun selection of cocktail bitters, preserves and other culinary delights and accoutrements. And while you are there, take a breather and indulge in wonderful small plates, wine tastings, cured meats, and a thoughtful list of cheese. Bottlehouse 1416 34th Ave., 206-708-7164 bottlehouseseattle.com prices vary, gift certificates available

Usually when people talk terroir, they’re referring to where wine grapes are grown. Not the distillers at Bainbridge Organic Distillers, who are taking full advantage of their island location to distill the state’s first USDA Certified organic vodka, gin and whiskey. Take a fun day trip to the distillery — open Monday through Saturday from noon to 5 p.m. — for tastings and holiday retail purchases. A boozy detour makes shopping 10 times more bearable. Bainbridge Organic Distillers 9727 Coppertop Loop NE, for Seattle retail locations, visit bainbridgedistillers.com prices vary

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Shanik Gift Certificate

Zoka Coffee Roasters & Tea

If you’re a foodie in Seattle, chances are you’ve made the pilgrimage to Vij’s in Vancouver, B.C. Well, Vikram’s spice-loving wife, Meeru, has taken border control out of the equation by bringing her delicious passion on a plate to South Lake Union with the opening of Shanik. Touted by Seattle Magazine as “The most anticipated restaurant opening of the year,” if you’re looking to impress your foodie friends with a dining experience to remember, this is it. Shanik 500 Terry Ave. N, shanikrestaurant.com $50 and up

Gift the gift of single-origin coffee beans from El Salvador to your caffeine-loving friends. We love their new-ish program, the Zoka Family Direct Trade, which means they create and maintain personal relationships with the coffee farmer and his or her family. For a special treat, give a pound of Zoka’s El Salvador La Montañita Pulp Natural — beans at their very best. Zoka Coffee Roasters and Tea Co. Greenlake, University, Kirkland and South Lake Union locations 866- ZOKA-NOW, zokacoffee.com $14.95 and up

Burgundian Gift Certificate

Just Add Wine

The latest addition to the Brouwer’s and Bottleworks family, Burgundian offers 22 beers on tap and a large craft can and bottled beer selection. The super-knowledgeable staff does a great job playing beer matchmaker and hearty fare like Chicken and Waffles provides the perfect foundation for tasting pints. Burgundian Tavern 2253 N 56th St., 206-420-8943 burgundianbar.com available in any amount

Our friends at Beecher’s know how to bring people together over tasty eats. This gift collection complements wine with one mother lode of an assortment of cheeses and accoutrements, including Beecher’s Flagship, Flagship Reserve, Smoked Flagship, 4-year Aged Flagship, No Woman, and Marco Polo Reserve. Just add wine and you have a party. Beecher’s Seattle beechershandmadecheese.com $85

Barbour Scarves and Bags

Not those bath kind of salts, silly. We’re talking about the wonderfully-soothing actually putthem-in-your-bath kind of salts. And Sugarpill has your stash — Dead Sea Salts, Bolivian Rose Salts, Red Alaea Clay Salts, Himalayan Pink Salts — just to name a few. And if you want one-of-a-kind stocking stuffers, check out Sugarpill’s amazing array of culinary seasalt offerings, including Flor Blanca, Japanese Aguni and Bali Pyramid, along with infusions such as Chili Verde and Smoked Serrano. Or pick up their infused organic and fair-trade cane sugars flavored with real fruits, peppers and oils. Sugarpill 900 E. Pine St., 206-322-7455 sugarpillseattle.com prices vary

In their Madrona studio/storefront, cousins and business partners Erica NelsonSheehan and Dustin Nelson design and sell the boutique’s private collection along with unique, hand-picked, one-of-a-kind jewelry, clothing and accessories from other select artists. Currently Hitchcock has an array of gender-neutral bags and wool scarves by Barbour that are both versatile and cute and come in a variety of styles; some can function as large tote bags, whereas others are smaller purses perfect for toting around the basics. The scarves small size and versatile colors make them easy to wear with anything. Hitchcock Madrona 1406 34th Ave., 206-838-7173 hitchcockmadrona.com prices vary

Seat tle weekly • DECEM BER 19−25, 2012

PAGE 29

Bath Salts

PROCRASTINATOR PAGES Ayurvedic Swedana Treatment The Minimalists: 2012 Holiday Happiness Tour (12/21) Seattle Radio Theatre: ‘I’ll Be Seeing You’ (12/21) Earshot Jazz: Duke Ellington’s Sacred Music (12/22) Seattle Baroque Orchestra: Baroque Celebration! (12/29)

Based on Ayurveda, the 5,000-year-old system of Indian medicine, this detoxifying spa service balances your dosha (kinda like your personal mind and body fingerprint). Get horizontal for a serious rubdown before retreating to the warm cocoon of the cedar Swedana to sweat out toxins. Finish up with an herbal powder brushing. Absolve all post-holiday guilt with this super-cleansing gift. Vida Spa at Seattle Pan Pacific Hotel 900 Lenora St., Suite 220, 888-865-2630 vidaspas.com/panpacifichotel $195

Interbay Golf Center

Jared Diamond: What Traditional Societies Can Teach Us (1/3)

Give the gift of golf with a gift card to Interbay Golf Center. Wintertime golfing in Seattle can be a bit challenging, but some practice time at this driving range can help keep your swing in tip-top shape. Covered, heated stalls make cold weather conditions manageable. Kids can sign up for one-day junior camps taught by PGA and LPGA teaching professionals; lesson packages are also available for adults. Interbay Golf Center 2501 15th Ave. W, 206-285-2200 premiergc.com available in any amount

SAF: Designing Big in Small Spaces (1/8) William Janeway: page 30 Capitalism in the Innovation Economy (1/9)

townhallseattle.org “The shop at Wing Luke Museum in the Chinatown-International District is fantastic!” – The Seattle Times

Seattle weekly • DECEM BER 19−25, 2012

Saturday, December 22 10am-5pm

15% OFF EVERYTHING ALL DAY

Up to 25% off jewelry & scarves from 10am-12pm

Unique Gifts for everyone at Wing Luke Museum Shop! WWW.WINGLUKE.ORG/MARKETPLACE 719 S. KING ST. 206.623.5124 EXT.203

Beer for Your Hair Ditch the spendy salon products and reach for a beer. Seattle-based hair-care company Duffy’s Brew has teamed up with Elysian Brewing Company to create a boozy line of hair products. Healthy hair newcomers The Wise ESB shampoo and conditioner join the company’s roster that includes Original Stout and Elysian’s Dragonstooth Stout. VAIN Locations in West Seattle, Ballard & Downtown, duffysbrew.com $18 shampoo, $20 conditioner

The Triple Door Gift Card Do you have a live-music lover on your shopping list? They’ll love a gift card to The Triple Door. Its intimate setting, cocktail service, and Asian menu from next-door Wild Ginger make it a hip sit-down dinnerclub venue for catching live national acts like Maceo Parker and Hot Tuna. For happy hour and local acts, check out Musicquarium Lounge, which is like an equally classy little sister. The Triple Door 216 Union St., 206-838-4333 thetripledoor.net available in any amount

WINTER SALE

Body Products

NOVEMBER 23 -DECEMBER 24

Ward off dry winter skin with Olivina’s line of moisturizing body products. Inspired by the natural beauty of the Northern California wine country, ingredients include grapeseed and extra virgin olive oils, along with pure shea butter, coconut oil, sweet almond, and rose-hip seed oils. Bonus: These subtly scented products are free from chemical parabens, preservatives and sodium lauryl sulfate. Three Birds Home & Gifts 2107 Queen Anne Ave. N, 206-686-7664 threebirdshome.com $8.50-$21

Markdowns on bikes, accessories & gear at both locations! 1007 NE BOAT STREET (206) 547-4491

Travel Set Designed by a self-proclaimed beauty junkie, Kari Gran’s all-natural line is handmade in Seattle in small batches using organic ingredients. The travel set, including the essential serum, hydrating tonic, and cleansing oil, can go straight into your carry-on, ensuring a healthy complexion in the air and on arrival. info@karigran.com 206-257-1226, karigran.com $35

BIKE RENTALS BUY • SELL • TRADE • CONSIGN “Seattle’s Used Bike Shop”

1109 N 35TH STREET (206) 397-4286 recycledcycles.com Mon-Fri 10am-7pm Sat-Sun 10am-6pm

page31

Hot Tub Boat Rental Having a hot tub is an awesome backyard addition living in the precipitation-prone Pacific Northwest. For those with hot-tub wishes limited by space constraints or budgets, there’s a solution — Hot Tub Boats. Year-round, rain or shine, you can gather five of your besties, put on a bathing suit and soak your way around Lake Union and Portage Bay. Boats are also available for overnight rentals and purchase. Hot Tub Boats 2520 Westlake Ave. N, 206-747-4362 hottubboats.com $139/hour and up

Bellingham’s magnificent natural scenery is matched only by the sheer volume of things to see and do. Outdoorsy sports enthusiasts can revel in the incomparable hiking, skiing & snowboarding at Mt. Baker. Arts enthusiasts can visit myriad galleries and theatres. Adventurers delight in exploring the charming villages and boarding vessels bound for whale watching. All will find a quick jaunt across the water to Lummi Island well worth the trip, for lodging and dining at a B&B like The Willows Inn is beyond compare. Don’t miss the incredible prix fixe dinner by Chef Blaine Wetzel Thursday-Sunday, starting at $177. Willows Inn 2579 West Shore Drive, Lummi Island 888-294-2620, willows-inn.com rooms starting at $204, gift cards available

Pulling an all -nighter? USE DUFFY’S BREW CRAFT BEER SHAMPOO. At Duffy’s Brew, we use real Craft Beer in our Shampoos, Conditioner, and Stying products. Why? Because it makes you look good. When you look good, you feel good. Things get much more interesting when you feel good. So loosen up, pour another drink, and enjoy yourself. And whatever happens...

now available at VAIN SALONS, ELYSIAN BREWING CO. AND ONLINE AT DUFFYSBREW.COM

Seat tle weekly • DECEM BER 19−25, 2012

Retreat to Bellingham

PROCRASTINATOR PAGES 100% Beeswax Candles These candles are made with the purest of ingredients: 100% pure beeswax (primarily from the Northwest), naturally extracted essential oils and 100% cotton wicks. Ten percent of the net profits from all Big Dipper candle sales are donated to organizations dedicated to outreach, education, and sustainability efforts devoted to promoting sustainable beekeeping. PCC Natural Markets Nine Puget Sound-area locations pccnaturalmarkets.com $5.59 and up

Arm Warmers Designed and fashioned by athletes for athletes, Oiselle is the official apparel sponsor of Christy Turlington’s foundation, Every Mother Counts, a charity dedicated to providing awareness for maternal health. For the female athletes on your list, consider a pair of Oiselle’s sleek arm warmers. They’ll keep your fave gal pal’s arms warm, whether she’s out for a run or walking the dog. Plus, reflective graphics step up the nighttime safety factor. West Seattle Runner 3727 California Ave. SW, #2A, 206-938-0545 westseattlerunner.com $32

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Seattle weekly • DECEM BER 19−25, 2012

Glass Water Bottle

H20 is essential to your health and happiness, but with the Seattle plastic bag ban in effect, we all know that plastic is a big no-no. Get your eight 8-ounce glasses a day with this unbreakable recycled-glass water bottle sleeved in eco-friendly bamboo. Perfect for hot or cold beverages. Pick from three BPAfree plastic tops depending upon your hydration needs. Miro Tea 5405 Ballard Ave206-782-6832 mirotea.com $25

Scarecrow Video Gift Card Fact: Scarecrow Video is home to the largest movie-rental inventory in the country, with more than 117,000 individual titles available for rent. Located in the University District, the indie video store stocks everything from latest releases to obscure titles and everything in between. Buy your fave movie buff a gift certificate, which are good for both rentals and sales. They also have an amazing selection of Blu-rays and DVDs for sale, which always make great gifts. Scarecrow Video 5030 Roosevelt Way NE, 206-524-8554 scarecrow.com available in any amount

Ugly Baby Shower Art Doug and Rosalie Gale’s quirky, waterproof shower art pieces are emblazoned with phrases like “Love handles are soft and sexy,” making suds time fun time. Their collection includes every single bathroom accessory you didn’t know you needed, as well as snarky greeting and postcard sets and Star Wars-inspired sweetheart tees. We love their new location nestled beneath Pike Place Market, which they share with La Ru, a line of handmade wearable art and original illustrations. Ugly Baby and La Ru 1430 Western Ave., 206-696-0089 uglybabyandlaru.com $10 and up

Give the Gift of Balboa Wine this Season! 1/2 price shipping of 6 bottles or more Free shipping on a full case

Gumball Poodle Socks One of the defining, ahem, fashion statements of the ‘70s. Who remembers rocking the three-stripe tube socks at the roller rink? Satisfy your need for nostalgia with Gumball Poodle’s unisex, Made in USA tube socks emblazoned with super groovy-words like Whiskey, Zombie and Nerd. Monster Art and Clothing 5000 20th Ave. NW, 206-789-0037 monsterartandclothing.com $10 or 3 pairs for $25

4169 Peppers Bridge Road Walla Walla, WA (509) 529-0461 • info@balboawinery.com

Give the gift of

Desert Lightning

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Aged Corn Whisky

Black Heron Spirits Find it at your local retailer.

Glassybaby

Your Most Romantic Holiday Ever!

Since its inception in 2003, Glassbaby has given more than one million from sales to charitable causes. We adore this season’s packaged set offerings of holiday votives and drinkers sets. The “Sleigh Bells Ring” set of three candle holders (middle row) and “Frosty the Snowman” set of four drinkers (bottom row) are particular charming. Better still, 10 percent from the sale of every holiday set will be donated to food banks that help and heal those in need. Glassybaby Locations in Madrona, U Village & Bellevue 877-299-3591, glassybaby.com Candle holders: $44 apiece Drinkers: $55 per glass

For Couples

Shopping List

1. We-Vibe 3 Super powerful! The #1 couples toy just got even better. Come and see why! 2. Earthly Body Wet Set Massage Care Kit A full size 3 in 1 massage candle. Massage/body lotion & a bottle of glow oil.

Pick up Candles, Feather Tickler, Satin Blindfold, and Edible lotions!

Punch in the Face Local author Jennifer Worick has written or co-authored more than 25 books, including the New York Times best-seller The WorstCase Scenario Survival Handbook: Dating & Sex. In her latest book, Things I Want to Punch in the Face, inspired by the blog of the same name, Worick uses sharp wit and humor to convey annoyance over those little things in life that chap your hide and warrant a tongue-in-cheek lashing. She says everything you’re thinking . . . out loud. (Prospect Park Books, 2012) Third Place Books, Ravenna: 6504 20th Ave NE, 206-525-2347 Lake Forest Park: 17171 Bothell Way NE 206-366-3333, thirdplacebooks.com $11.95

Don‛t forget sexy shoes!

For Him

1. Fleshlight Vortex The # 1 selling male masturbation toy. 2. Anereos Helix The top prostate stimulator. 3. Mary Green silk thong or a pair of Junk underjeans

Any vibrating penis ring SEATTLE EVERETT MARYSVILLE BELLINGHAM

7750 15th Ave NW 206-782-3763 5716 Evergreen Way 425-353-7965 9501 State Ave 360-651-2840 4227 Guide Meridian 360-738-0737

Seat tle weekly • DECEM BER 19−25, 2012

For Her

1. Lelo Soraya waterproof “rabbit-style” vibe 2. We-Vibe Touch 3. A sexy piece of lingerie or maybe a corset

PROCRASTINATOR PAGES Coaster Set

Enjoy these specials until the 24th:

Monday - Sunday 10am to 6pm Tuesday 10am to 7pm

Buy a $50 gift card and you get a $20 card for FREE!

Don’t let wine-glass rings ruin your table —slide a stylish wood coaster under your glass and drink easy. These amazing, real wood coasters from Spitfire Girl come in a beautiful, ready-to-gift handmade wood box with a sliding top to display your set all the time. Love it, share it and buy it for a friend, because every table can benefit from pretty accessories. Sip and Ship 1752 NW Market St., 206-789-4488 & 8560 Greenwood Ave. N, 206-783-4299 sipandship.com $43.75

Fresh Home-Made Tamales Specials

Bacon Crack Cupcake Royale has cooked up the most incredible Bacon Crack, perfect for your bacon-loving friends and family and a great topping for any ice cream sundae. Sneak it under the tree or stuff it in a stocking; this lovely jar of bacon brittle is the number one gift for salty-sweet lovers. Don’t believe how good it is? Ask for a sample at any Cupcake Royale cafe. Cupcake Royale, locations in Ballard, Capitol Hill, Madrona, West Seattle & Bellevue cupcakeroyale.com $9.50

ISSAQUAH HIGH LANDS

1048 NE PARK DRIVE 425.369.8900

REDMOND BEAR CREEK SHOPPING CENTER

Large Private Party Room 425.881.8252

“Best Destination Restaurant 2012” Martha Stewart Living

“Blaine Wetzel, Best New Chef” Food & Wine Magazine, 2012

Seattle weekly • DECEM BER 19−25, 2012

“James Beard semi-finalist”

Visit our website to purchase your gift certificate today!

Tatoosh Bourbon Using a Southern family moonshine recipe, traditional distilling techniques, and Pacific Northwest ingredients, Seattle-based Tatoosh Distillery has crafted an exceptionally versatile liquor. Neat, on the rocks, or subbed for whiskey or rye in drinks such as a Manhattan (adjust the other ingredients to compensate for the much drier bourbon), your recipient will love this 100-year-old recipe. Independent Liquor & Wine Westwood Village, 511 SW Trenton St. 206-402-5363, tatooshdistillery.com $49

Scrappy’s Bitters Gift Box

www.willows-inn.com 360-758-2620 | 888-294-2620 2579 West Shore Drive Lummi Island, WA 98262

Boma Faceted Gemstone Jewelry featured at University Village, Pacific Place & Bellevue Square

You’ve seen Scrappy’s Bitters grace the bars of your favorite fancy watering holes. Now bring this can’t-live-without cocktail ingredient home. This perfect starter gift of old-fashioned bitters contains: Cardamom, Chocolate, Grapefruit and Orange flavors or choose a kit containing Lime, Lavender, Celery and Orange. And since they want you to achieve mixology success, there’s a recipe card stashed inside each box to get your creative juices (and the cocktails!) flowing. Wine World and Spirits 400 NE 45th St., 206-402-6086 wineworldspirits.com $25.95

food&drink»

The Mermaid of Mumbai

After six years of false starts, Starbucks finally opens in India. Will it be worth the wait? BY JEN SWANSON

rewards those who have the patience to do business here. “On the positive side, the story in India is very good,” says Singhal. “Consumers are very optimistic about spending, and they’re spending on a wider range of products and services.” In many parts of the world, he says, retailers find cash-strapped consumers less willing to splurge on their products. “In India, consumer spending is a challenge that is not being faced yet,” Singhal explains. Despite the global downturn, India’s economy still grows, on average, 5 percent each year. Even a slice of that pie has the potential to prop up sluggish sales elsewhere—particularly in Europe, where Starbucks continues to shutter underperforming stores. Similarly, executives at Tata Starbucks remain hopeful. “India is one of the most exciting markets in the world, with a very diverse and dynamic culture,” says Avani Saglani Davda, CEO of Tata Starbucks Limited, in an e-mail. “The size of the Indian economy, the growth of cafe culture, and the rising spending power hold strong potential for our growth here.” Since opening its flagship store in Mumbai on October 19, Tata Starbucks has opened two additional outlets in the city. Somewhat ironically, the “Starbucksization” of India is something Café Coffee Day has so far managed better than Schultz. “They are in tourist destinations, office complexes, gas stations,” Singhal says of the pervasive brand, which opens Not your cookie-cutter Starbucks. an average of one new store per day, as Starbucks did in its ’90s heyday. “Café Coffee Day is almost everywhere where people in a two-day collapse of its electrical grid are, and there are lots of people in India.” this summer that left hundreds of millions But slowing down Starbucks’ typical rate without power. Trickiest of all might be of expansion to “crack the code” (as Schultz navigating India’s labyrinth of red tape and has described entering the Indian market corruption, which seems to taint the reputo other press) may serve the company tation of any foreign brand that dares to do well in the long term. “It has taken them business here. Last year, UK-based drink[Starbucks] a while, maker Diageo paid $16 at the end of the million to settle a brib“India is very short of but day, I think they’ve ery case. Most recently, good locations where found a very good Walmart’s Gurgaonpeople can sit down for a partner,” Singhal says based franchise came under investigation cup of tea or coffee, of the Seattle-based Not only is for bribery. It was also to just meet casually.” brewer. Tata Global Beverages revealed that the AmeriIndia’s largest cofcan company dumped fee producer; the Indian conglomerate also $100 million into a puppet consultancy brings a vast network of hotels and realty that, according to Reuters, lacked both from other business holdings, along with a employees and profits. reputation of “absolute cleanliness.” Singhal hopes the recent scandals will But Mumbaikars may care less about the refocus the debate on how to simplify the brand than about finding a new place to hang process of doing business in India—critical out. “Initially it’s not so much a question to which is allowing less room for bureauof Café Coffee Day versus Starbucks,” says crats to demand bribes. “Nobody in India Singhal. “India is very short of good locations wants to give a bribe to do a legitimate where people can sit down for a cup of tea or business,” says Singhal. “If Walmart or anybody wants to conduct a business legiti- coffee, to just meet casually. It’s more about just finding a good coffee shop next to your mately in India, why should they have to house or next to where you are.” E pay a bribe to some inspector?” But India’s flourishing consumer class food@seattleweekly.com JEN SWANSON

opportunity for Tata Starbucks here, particularly if the young franchise can provide a consistent level of quality product and service—something competitors haven’t done in the past. “In some [Café Coffee Day] outlets, you will get outstanding products and outstanding service, and in some other outlets you will get absolutely terrible products and terrible service. So consistency of products and consistency of service is something which, for a player like Starbucks, which has global experience managing tens of thousands of locations, could be their competitive advantage.” Success also depends on how wisely Tata Starbucks chooses its new locations. In India, the franchise shouldn’t rule out the outsourcing hubs around Bangalore, Delhi, and Mumbai when considering new locations, says Singhal, calling those areas “small townships” with thousands of employees packed onto a single campus. “If they [Tata Starbucks] limit themselves to the more sanitized locations like hotels or malls, they will do well,” Singhal explains. “But they will also be sub-optimizing the potential in India.”

egardless of Tata Starbucks’ growth strategy, the daily challenge of working in India remains. Painful evidence of the nation’s crumbling infrastructure came

Seat tle weekly • DECEM BER 19−25, 2012

uring a recent Friday lunch hour, the line at Mumbai’s first Starbucks nearly spilled out the door. Yet the promise of a long wait didn’t deter anyone. The Seattlebased company’s first Indian outlet was already six years behind schedule. The 30 or so businessmen, students, and sari-clad women patiently queuing were just happy to finally try a Frappuccino. Other than its massive size—it’s housed in an elegant colonial-era mansion—Tata Starbucks , as the Indian venture is known, proffers its parent brand’s staple look. Towers of ceramic mugs and other items for sale are neatly stacked near the register. Coffee-bean bags and portraits of smiling Indians holding Starbucks cups decorate the walls. Employees in green hats and aprons scribble drink orders onto paper or plastic cups at the register. While the customer pays, those cups are transferred to page 34 a separate coffee bar, where baristas make sense of the shorthand behind gleaming espresso machines. At first glance, the new shop appears even better than the American version. Drinks are cheaper, and the pastry case offers more than sandwiches and muffins. Alongside chicken tikka panini and cheesecakes, a tempting spread of tandoori paneer rolls and cardamom croissants appeals to India’s predilection for vegetarian foods with spice. But a closer look reveals a few cracks—perhaps just growing pains as the 2-month-old store struggles to find its footing. The baristas, frantically blending and pouring Indian-grown espresso, appear overwhelmed by the endless arrival of new cups at the bar. The employee charged with ferrying new orders between the bar and the register drops an entire tray of empty cups onto the floor—but instead of rewriting those orders on clean cups, he hastily arranges them on the edge of the bar. Adding to the confusion is that by the time customers make it through both queues, which today is taking about 45 minutes, many lose their patience. Naysayers claim the coffee goliath has arrived too late: In the six years it has taken Schultz and co. to break into one of the world’s fastest-growing coffee markets, some 2,500 other cafes have set up shop around the country. (With more than 1,300 outlets and counting, India’s Café Coffee Day will be Tata Starbucks’ largest competitor.) But other experts predict India’s $230 million coffee market has plenty of room for new players. “Given the size of this country, India could stand another 7,000 cafes,” says Arvind Singhal, chairman of Technopak Advisors, a consultancy based in the city of Gurgaon that advises companies hoping to enter India’s booming food and retail sectors. Singhal believes there is plenty of

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R & L HOME OF GOOD BAR-B-Q 1816 E. Yesler Way,

322-0271. Nothing fancy here; the soda comes out of a vending machine in the corner, and they don’t take plastic. But R & L sure makes a mean pulled-pork sandwich and fine plate of ribs. The Southern hospitality exhibited by the mother/daughter team who run the joint couldn’t be more welcoming. Even if the food didn’t call you back, the atmosphere—or wonderful lack thereof—would. $ SABA ETHIOPIAN RESTAURANT 112 12th Ave., 328-2290. Squeamishness about raw food is perfectly understandable. Most Seattleites have gotten past that when it comes to tuna or egg yolks (thank you, Japan), but now it’s time to let raw beef push you the rest of the way. Saba’s Gored Gored comprises tender, uncooked beef cubes covered in awaze, a red chile sauce. The combination of heat, sweet, and raw meat juices (aka “blood”) explodes on your tongue, pushing away all thought of mad cow. By the end you’ll just be grateful for the injera, the pancake-like bread served with Ethiopian cuisine, to sop up anything left on your plate. That said, if you just can’t bring yourself to put chunks of raw cow in your mouth, Saba’s menu is filled with flavor-filled cooked lamb, lentils, and more. $ TANA MARKET 2518 E. Cherry St., 322-3835. Equal parts all-American mini-mart, Ethiopian grocery supplier, and restaurant, Tana offers large plates of Ethiopian dishes alongside manhole-cover-sized discs of sour, crepe-like injera. The beef tibs, a typical Ethiopian stew, is made with sliced beef, onions, jalapenos, and a ton of berbere (a common Ethiopian spice mixture typically containing fenugreek, basil, garlic, ginger, and a healthy dose of heat in the form of chili peppers). These dishes are made for two (or four) to share and are around $13. $

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MCCORMICK & SCHMICK’S SEAFOOD RESTAURANT 1103 First Ave., 623-5500. This wood-

paneled haunt attracts players and lowly office workers alike, and arguably boasts the best happy hour in the city—possibly in the country. McCormick and Schmick’s lunches and dinners—offering wellprepared seafood, pasta, and steaks—are generally much pricier. But a midday chef’s special usually gets you a fine piece of fish with sides for $7.95. $$ PALOMINO RESTAURANT & BAR 1420 Fifth Ave., Ste. 350, 623-1300. Located on the top floor of City Center, Palomino is a stylish restaurant that attracts droves of 20- and 30-somethings, especially at the end of the workday. It serves standard midscale American fare (pasta, seafood, steak) that’s decent but forgettable. However, the happy hour (4–6 p.m. and 9 p.m.–close, daily) is an absolute steal, featuring $8 brick-oven pizzas, under-$10 appetizers like calamari and mussels, $4 house wines, and $5 specialty cocktails. Better still, your server will validate your parking so you can enjoy a downtown romp after your meal. $$ TULIO RISTORANTE 1100 Fifth Ave. (in the Hotel Vintage Park), 624-5500. A fedora, or maybe even spats, wouldn’t look out of place in Tulio’s handsome 1920s-era dining room. The food is far more contemporary. An Italian eyebrow might tilt at smokedsalmon ravioli with lemon cream or grilled calamari with spicy Tuscan rice beans and a parsley aioli, but chef Walter Pisano treats his ingredients harmoniously. Meats may come out overcooked; pastas and risottos, never. This is food even society matrons would unclench their jaws for, served in a room that makes its guests feel like they’re richer than their bank accounts would attest. $$$

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his choice, he picked Anacortes IPA. In the Pacific Northwest, “more hops than you can handle” is a common beer battle cry, and this pint fits the bill. The Verdict: With traces of grapefruit, Anacortes IPA is floral, herbal and, yes, very hoppy. A sweet, clean malt makes the pint thick enough to be comforting in winter while still managing to be refreshing. With dusk hitting a little after 4 p.m. these days, the Fiddler’s Inn is the place to order nachos, drink a couple of reasonably priced rounds, and ride out a long night. E food@seattleweekly.com

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Seat tle weekly • DECEM BER 19−25, 2012

The Watering Hole: Fiddler’s Inn, 9219 35th Ave. N.E., 525-0752, WEDGWOOD The Atmosphere: One of the first bars in Seattle to secure a liquor license after Prohibition ended, Fiddler’s Inn was built in 1933. It changed ownership and underwent a remodel in 1995. (The proprietors also run the Hopvine Pub on Capitol Hill and the Latona Pub near Green Lake.) There’s a campground cookhouse-meets-ski lodge feel to the creaky, wooden room. Board games, broken-in crime novels, and a vintage Merriam-Webster dictionary are stacked in one corner, while dried hops hang from the rafters near the bar. It’s like mistletoe, only better. The Barkeep: Working on and off at Fiddler’s for the past decade, Les Leslie has a background in the tech industry. Whenever he gets frustrated with cubicle life, he comes back to bartending. Leslie prides himself on knowing the name of almost every regular. “I’m an introvert, so bartending is more of a challenge than sitting in front of a screen all day,” he says. “Every time I pour a beer, someone says, ‘Thank you.’ No one says, ‘Thank you’ in the tech world.” The Drink: The Fiddler keeps it simple, serving a rotating list of only beer and wine. When I asked Leslie to serve me a drink of

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Seattle weekly • DECEM BER 19−25, 2012

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ALittLeRAskin » by hanna raskin

We Meat Again

Dispelling the worries of Seattleites who weren’t sure where they’d buy homemade potato sausage, lutefisk, or crown pork roast this Christmas, a beloved butcher reopened his meat counter this month. Tom Salle, whose grandparents in 1937 opened the Top Hat grocery store which evolved into Bernie and Boys, spent 18 months rebuilding a former realtor’s office at the edge of White Center. He planned to open Meat the Live Butcher as early as this summer, but was repeatedly slowed by construction delays. The new shop, which community members helped assemble, is about the size of the meat department in the family’s first grocery. Salle says he’s furnished the 800-squarefoot store with reclaimed barn wood from Whidbey Island and diamond plate aluminum doors, but loyal customers who pestered him to carry on the legacy threatened by Bernie and Boys’ 2011 closure (a decision Salle attributes to a lost lease and flagging family enthusiasm) are most interested in what he

keeps in his meat cases. “They’re coming in, looking for the things they always got,” Salle says. “Old-fashioned sausage and customer service.” In addition to choice- and prime-grade pork and beef, the store stocks organic rabbit and natural lamb; bison and elk will be available soon. As at Bernie and Boys, Salle custom-cuts and hand-grinds meat to order, packaging orders in butcher paper. What’s new at Meat the Live Butcher is a processing oven which Salle can use to smoke sockeye salmon and dry beef jerky. Christmas has always been a busy season for Salle. While the store is typically open 10 a.m.–7 p.m. Tuesday– Sunday, he plans to open Meat the Live Butcher next Monday, Christmas Eve. “I might see customers once or twice a year, but for holidays, they’re definitely here,” he says. For Salle’s own Christmas dinner, he’s serving ham. “I usually like to have a rib roast, but whatever Mom wants to do,” he says. “We’re an Italian family, so we’ll have pasta first and then get into the meat of it.” E hraskin@seattleweekly.com

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Seat tle weekly • DECEM BER 19−25, 2012

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dategirl»By Judy McGuire

Dear Dategirl, My boyfriend of almost one year is fucking amazing. He’s affectionate, sensitive, manly, emotionally present, vulnerable, and wonderful with my kid. Sex is also amazing. When we have it. Which is not nearly as often as I need it. He’s 38, I’m 28. In the beginning, it happened more often, and at the time we were living separately and working totally different schedules. Since we moved in together, sex has dropped drastically, and I busted this glorious (sarcasm alert) man “sexting” with other women. This has apparently been going on the whole time we’ve been together. He’s since stopped and gotten an awesome new therapist. The man has some issues. I’ve been overly vocal and communicative about needing more sex for the past six months. So much that at this point, I’m a big, fat turnoff. Side note: I’m an attractive lady. He has a list of reasons why his libido is practically nonexistent, but Jesus Christ, I need him to fuck me more often or it’s going to destroy us. Fuck the issues, just fuck me! I’m also in therapy and have been for several years. Should I just overcome our sexual issues and initiate it more often? It’s reached this point of seriousness that looks like there’s no going back and making it fun and simple. Sex feels good and it’s fun. Why is it such a big fucking deal? —Frustrated

Hard truth ahead: Your boyfriend’s libido seems to be working quite well with other women. He just doesn’t seem to have any interest in the home team. Obviously sex isn’t the be-all/end-all in a relationship, and plenty of people have satisfying love lives despite dealing with physical limitations that render them unable to enjoy traditional coupling methods. But you don’t mention any physical roadblocks. While it’s swell that he’s working with a therapist on his “issues” (since when is being a withholding leghumper an issue?), you guys haven’t even been together a year. You’re still in the honeymoon phase. Now imagine yourself five years down the line. Unless he has some medical problem he’s resolving, it’s probably not going to get much better than it is right now. In fact, frequency usually declines with time. So says the lady who’s been with the same guy for eight years. It’s a cruel twist of fate that women tend to get randier when they feel secure and happy in a relationship, while men are hornier when they’re running around out in the wild, but couples can usually work this out through compromise, masturbation, and yelling at each other. However, his untrustworthiness adds a whole other kink to your tale. It shouldn’t be this hard (heh) this soon. Instead of waiting for this shrink to work some kind of magic on his gonads, you need to figure out whether you can deal with your sex life the way it is right now for the rest of your life before you commit to hanging out with this guy for much longer. Because waiting for a dude to change is a loser’s game. What if he doesn’t? Because he probably won’t. You haven’t even reached your sexual peak yet, and you’re clawing the walls. Think how you’ll feel in two years, or even two months. E

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Seattle weekly • DECEM BER 19−25, 2012

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WAGoodness

edical-marijuana patients in Tacoma have the good fortune to have safe access to cannabis right downtown (convenient to mass transit) and at very reasonable prices. Tacoma Cross is a “destination” access point with more than 35 strains of marijuana—all priced at $10 a gram, with $7, $8, and $9 specials available. The place isn’t understaffed, either: Unlike some shops where the receptionist is also the budtender and proprietor, here plenty of knowledgeable budtenders can help you. With such an extensive menu, informed guidance is exactly what’s needed, and with the help of store director Matt, I selected three attractive strains: the indica-dominant Washington Goo (WAGoo); the CDB-rich strain Sun & Ocean; and the sativa-dominant hybrid Strawberry Cough. Sun & Ocean is a good medicinal strain for patients dealing with pain and inflammation; its 9 percent CDB level (labtested, according to Matt), along with its 9 percent THC, means that it can effectively reduce pain levels without incapacitating you with an overpowering high. Sun & Ocean is therefore a good choice when you need to medicate for pain but have tasks to accomplish or people to meet. The medical potential of CBD is only just beginning to be realized—in fact, a THC-free strain, which produces no “high,” is already being used with some patients in the Israeli government’s medical-marijuana program. Strawberry Cough is a perennial West Coast favorite due to its signature taste/

smell and its uplifting, cerebral euphoria. Be ready for extreme munchies with this strain, and also for throat-tickling lung expansion when you take a toke. Strawberry Cough is proof that a powerful marijuana high needn’t be uncomfortable in any way; in fact, it’s a snuggly, uplifting buzz conducive to the appreciation of nature, whether the beach, the forest, or your significant other. And then there’s the WAGoo, a potent cross of Afgoo x G-13. Afgoo’s blend of Afghani, Hawaiian, and Thai genetics have made it a favorite strain of mine; there’s a reason Afgoo was Seattle Weekly’s official Cannabis Strain of the Year last year. Combine that genetic heritage with that of G-13, which urban legend claims is a government-developed strain, and you have some serious medicine. (The story about G-13 being developed by the feds is almost certainly bullshit, since marijuana grown on the federal pot farm in Oxford, Miss., is almost universally derided as of substandard potency.) For patients who want to grow their own medicine, Tacoma Cross has a respectable collection of clones at $15 apiece, including Space Jill, Moon Wreck, Pit Bull, Blue Dream, Jilly Bean, and Master Kush. T.G.A. Subcool seed packets are available as well, for a $45 donation. E

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500 Services 510 515 520 525 527 530 535 536 537 540

800 Health & Wellness 805 Licensed Massage 807 Unlicensed Massage 815 Mind, Body, Spirit

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805 Licensed Massage

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105 Career/Training/Schools AIRLINE CAREERS - Become an Aviation Maintenance Tech. FAA approved training. Financial aid if qualified Housing available. Job placement assistance. CALL Aviation Institute of Maintenance 877-492-3059 (AAN CAN) ATTEND COLLEGE ONLINE from Home. *Medical, *Business, *Criminal Justice, *Hospitality. Job placement assistance. Computer available. Financial Aid if qualified. SCHEV authorized. Call 800-481-9472 www.CenturaOnline.com (AAN CAN)

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DIRECTV is currently recruiting for the following position in Lynnwood: Warehouse Assistant If you are not able to access our website, DIRECTV.com, mail your resume and salary requirements to: DIRECTV, Attn: Talent Acquisition, 161 Inverness Drive West, Englewood, CO 80112. To apply online, visit: www.directv.com/careers. EOE.

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bulletin board 537 Child Adoption

572 Holistic

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Ear Candling a non-invasive cleansing and detoxifying of the ears. Ear, Balance, Hearing, Pressure, Sinus & Wax Problems Etc... Certified Ear Conologist, 16 years experience. On Capitol Hill, Seattle. (360)620-6133 Seeking an Intern ASAP

Seat tle weekly • DECEM BER 19−25, 2012

355 Roommates 360 Rooms for Rent 363 Roommate Services Apartment/Condo/Townhome 365 370 House/Duplexes for Rent Short Term/Corporate Housing 380 Manufactured Home Rentals 390 Vacation

Sr Statistical Analyst sought by Premera Blue Cross in Mountlake Terrace, WA. Dsgn & lead advanced analytic; interpret & apply industry grouping techniques such as DxCGs, ETGs, ACGs, AP-DRGs, APR-DRGsl; write d/base manipulation & advanced analytical prgms using SAS (incl macros), SQL, Cognos; use variety of data & data formats used across healthcare industry such as pharmacy/PBM data, health risk assessment or disease mgmt prgm data, claims, EMR, lab result data, & survey data. Reqs Master's deg in Biostats, Stats, Math, Econ or related & 5 yrs of related exp, which must involve applying advanced analytic/statistical techniques to large operational datasets & writing prgms using statistical s/ware packages & d/base mgmt s/ware. Send resumes to careers@premera.com. Ref job title in subject.

167 Restaurants/Hotels/Clubs

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305 307 310 315 320 330 340 350

Sr Developer II (Multiple Positions) sought by Premera Blue Cross in Mountlake Terrace, WA. Provide dsgn & tech'l consulting expertise for small to medium sized projects. Reqs Bach's deg or equiv in IT related field & 6 yrs related exp, which involve applying features & functions of application dvlpmt languages &/or D/base Mgmt Systems (DBMS). Send resumes to careers@premera.com. Ref job title in subject.

185 Miscellaneous

Tree & Shrub Consultation Representative We are expanding our Marketing Team by Hiring Additional Reps to Generate Free Tree & Shrub Consultations Appointments for our Arborists.

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300 Rentals

CyberSource Corporation, a Visa Inc. company, currently has openings in our Bellevue, Washington for Staff Software Engineers (124614) to participate in the design and implementation of various service-oriented solutions. Must be able to work on a cross-functional team, and be comfortable working with a wide variety of technologies. Apply online at www.visa.com & reference Job #124614. EOE

Technology Help build the next generation of systems behind Facebook's products. Facebook Services, Inc. currently has the following openings in Seattle, WA (various levels/types): Software Engineers (SW12SBN) Create web applications, and build high volume servers to support our content. Bachelor’s degree required; Software Engineers (SW12S-MN) Utilizing graduate level knowledge, create web applications, and build high volume servers to support our content. Master’s degree required; Mail resume to: Facebook Services, Inc. Attn: JAA-GTI, 1601 Willow Rd. Menlo Park, CA 94025. Must reference title and job#, when applying.

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Get paid for giving infertile couples the chance to have a baby. Women 21-31 and in good health are encouraged to apply. $5,000 compensation. Email Amy.Smith@integramed.com or call (206)301-5000

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