Into the Deep | September 2022

WHO WE ARE...

P U BL ISHE R

From 2007 to 2012 we, the Millers, adopted our first three children, a preschooler on the autism spectrum and two babies with Down syndrome. We published our first issue of Plain Values in 2012 to highlight Biblical ministries, share the beauty of adoption, and to cultivate anchored community. In 2018 we welcomed our fourth child in a surprise adoption, this time a baby with Mosaic Down syndrome. We homeschool our family and enjoy working together to grow and raise food on our twelve acre homestead.

Marlin Miller SA L E S A DV ISO R - O HIO

Matt Yoder SA L E S A DV ISO R - M IC HIA N A + P ENNSY LVANI A

Aaron Stutzman E DITO R IA L M A N AG E R

Nic Stoltzfus Q UA L IT Y A SSU RA N C E

WHAT WE BELIEVE...

Sabrina Schlabach

Our values are plain values, steeped in the rich traditions of yesterday. We enjoy the simple things in life. Gathering eggs from the coop, getting our hands in the dirt to grow food, and cooking meals from scratch. Sometimes we sit around a fire and share life. We strive to walk humbly to strengthen authentic relationships with our families and neighbors. And, yes, we have taken a fresh pie to a front porch and surprised a friend… we didn’t even text them before! We just stopped by, walked up the steps, and knocked on the door! Just the way our grandparents used to do on a Sunday evening. They called it living in community.

We seek to serve our neighbors. Plain Values began with a prayer, hoping to play a small role in connecting a child with Down syndrome to his or her forever family. We have checked that box nearly a dozen times in the last ten years, and we will not stop until the orphanages are empty!

We will rest in Heaven!

P RO DU C T IO N M A N AG E R

Isaac Hershberger M U LT I- M E DIA P RO DU C T IO N

Seth Yoder O F F IC E M A N AG E R / C U STO MER S ERVI C E

Jan Schlabach BO O K K E E P E R

Julia Browning O C TO BE R A D C LO SE

September 6, 2022 WR IT E R – SE RV IN G O U R N E IG H B O R

HOW YOU CAN HELP...

Join us as we pursue a more authentic life. By subscribing to Plain Values, a portion of each subscription goes directly to Room to Bloom, our non-profit that supports children with special needs.

Robert Rogers with Merlin Erb WR IT E R – WHISP E RS O F HO P E

Darren Gagnon WR IT E R – RO OTS + WIN GS

Rory Feek

JOIN US FOR PORCH TIME! Every third Friday from 1:00pm – 4:00pm

Stop by, enjoy a cup of coffee or tea, sit on the porch, and visit for a while. We'd love to get to know you! We're located in the heart of Winesburg, Ohio – just down the street from the church.

WR IT E R – T HE HE A L IN G L A N D

Shawn & Beth Dougherty WR IT E R – CO N F E SSIO N S O F A ST EWAR D

Joel Salatin WR IT E R – T HE WIDOW ' S PAT H

Ferree Hardy WR IT E R – O U R HE R ITAG E

Elam Stoltzfus WR IT E R – A L L T HIN GS O U T DO O RS

Jim Zumbo

Plain Values is published monthly by Plain Target Marketing, LLC. Please contact us with any questions.

A DDR E SS

P.O. Box 201 / 2106 Main Street Winesburg, OH 44690 P HO N E

FA X

330-601-6106

330-601-4099

E M A IL

reachout@plainvalues.com WE BSIT E

www.plainvalues.com

This publication and its contents are © 2022, Plain Target Marketing, LLC. Individual copyrighted items, trademarks, etc. contained within are the property of their respective copyright holders. No part of this publication may be reproduced or redistributed by any means without authorization from the publisher. Publisher is not responsible for advertisers’ offers, products, or services, and publication neither expresses nor implies an endorsement.

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contents serving our neighbor 13

INTO THE DEEP Finding God in the Depth of Sorrow WORDS BY: ROBERT ROGERS with MERLIN ERB

“Mr. Rogers, we need to ask you to identify the bodies of your three youngest children. They are dead.” Those piercing words from early Sunday morning, August 31, 2003, changed my life forever.

simple living 33

THE HEALING LAND Apples COLUMN BY: SHAWN & BETH DOUGHERTY

The apple trees in the orchard are bearing well this year, with russet and yellow-green fruit studding the young branches.

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CONFESSIONS OF A STEWARD Vicarious Farming COLUMN BY: JOEL SALATIN

When I suggest that we should have many more farmers (and fewer factory farmers), people often squirm and respond, "But all of us can't be farmers."

resources 10

WHISPERS OF HOPE Lost Sparrows Trauma Conference COLUMN BY: DARREN GAGNON

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BUSINESS SPOTLIGHT HyR BRIX

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September 2022 // Issue 111

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ONE MINUTE WITH MARLIN

ON THE COVER

PRAYERS FOR THE NATIONS

Thoughts and ramblings from Marlin Miller, publisher of Plain Values.

In 2003, a flash flood slammed into the Rogers' family minivan, changing Robert's life forever.

This month we take a closer look at the country of Laos in southeast Asia.

community 27

ROOTS + WINGS Mountain Time COLUMN BY: RORY FEEK

Each year, Indiana and I spend some time in the mountains. And though from Tennessee to Montana there’s technically only an hour difference in time zones—for us, it’s more like a year…

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THE WIDOW'S PATH Hobbies and Healing COLUMN BY: FERREE HARDY

During grief, when we suffer the loss of a loved one, we simply cannot endlessly maintain grief’s emotional roller-coaster ride.

It's exhausting.

history 51

OUR HERITAGE Reflections on the Martyrs COLUMN BY: ELAM STOLTZFUS

Today, we can thank these early American Amish and Mennonite religious leaders for including the martyr stories in the back of the Ausbund.

outdoors 55

ALL THINGS OUTDOORS Western Game Hunt COLUMN BY: JIM ZUMBO

Planning your trip will take some work, but hunting the West makes it all worth it. There’s just one problem. You might become addicted to that spectacular mountain scenery...

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one minute with Marlin

MARLIN MILLER publisher, always looking for more friends

"we few. we happy few. we band of brothers, for he today that sheds his blood with me shall be my brother."

SHAKESPEARE'S LINE from Henry V is often used in terms of war and the brotherhood that is formed among a group of soldiers as they fine-tune their craft. If I may offer another angle, I sometimes wonder if this brotherhood mentality can't be seen and experienced in other teams and types of work. Caring for one another while making each other laugh, to embrace the challenge at hand and get through it together happens in coal mines, on top of cell phone towers, and in sewers. Here at the Plain Values office, where one of the most dangerous risks we face are rogue paper cuts, we routinely find ways to make each other laugh till bubbles of snot come gurgling out… somewhere!

A few weeks ago, I read through Ecclesiastes. Since then, I have been observing and thinking about all the meaninglessness I see today. Solomon, the wisest guy ever, tells us how pointless and futile our thinking often is in no uncertain terms.

My friend Brian recently shared of his search for answers to a decades-long saga in which his grandpa disowned his family. As his grandpa had passed away years ago, my friend longed for closure.

How and why did this happen? Without giving anything away, it was a massive miscommunication. Years went by, the grandpa passed into eternity, and still, the mutual mystification continued… until Brian dug in and began asking the hard questions.

You might be wondering how in the world this goofball is going to tie three unrelated thoughts and stories into a knot and make his point; and that would be a fair question! Here it is: outside of our relationship with our Creator, the people around us, our spouses, our families, the folks we get to work with are the most important of our lives. You don't build a brotherhood around truths that matter and bind us together without communication.

Genuine and deep communication. I don't care, nor did Solomon for that matter, how much or how little you have, who your parents were, or where you studied– we are all born with a longing to belong! We all hope to be part of a tribe bigger than ourselves and to build relationships that make eternal impacts. I dare you to find joy in the middle of hard things. I'm not saying it's easy, but I am saying it's worth it!

As always, may you find joy in the simple things. //

A few "snot-bubble" moments with the Plain Values crew 6

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whispers of hope

SUPPORT FOR THOSE WHO FOSTER + ADOPT

COLUMN BY:

IN 2021 LOST SPARROWS hosted its first annual conference on developmental trauma. Two hundred and fifty people sat through a long but encouraging and informative day of speakers addressing various issues surrounding trauma. We felt like it was a great start, but we could do better. Therefore, we are excited to share that we are hosting our second annual Trauma Conference this October 14-15 in Winona Lake, Indiana.

Last year my wife Stacey and I shared the four lies we believed when we began fostering in 2006. We believed that children were born resilient, and that they would forget the challenges they endured as infants—issues of abandonment and neglect, physical and emotional abuse. We were wrong. We believed that our love would fix them, and that when things got difficult, we just needed to try harder as parents. We were wrong.

Trauma parenting is a different form of parenting. All of the tools and techniques we used with our biological children failed miserably with our kids with trauma. We learned some very hard lessons and made too many mistakes to count. So now, we share with others what we learned, and we do the best we can to support other families learning how to trauma parent. We share how trauma changes the developing brain of a child, and how, instead of being wired for connection, the brain becomes wired for protection.

Darren Gagnon

We hope you will consider joining us this October to learn from some amazing experts in the field of developmental trauma. We have a unique mix of speakers with different backgrounds and experiences, but with the same love for helping others know how to parent, teach, counsel, or lead effectively.

Our theme this year is The Ripple Effect. We hope to create ripples of hope in our community.

“I alone cannot change the world, but I can cast a stone across the waters to create many ripples.” – Mother Teresa Who should attend? This conference is designed for foster parents, adoptive parents, teachers, youth workers, caseworkers, caregivers, church staff, counselors, or those just wanting to better understand trauma.

What topics will be covered? There will be many topics discussed, including attachment issues, autism, challenging behaviors, trauma parenting, helping victims of abuse, addiction, self-care, co-regulation, and caregiver burnout. We will have 30 breakout sessions to choose from over the two days.

The conference will be held on the campus of Grace College, 200 Seminary Drive, Winona lake, IN. Breakfast and lunch on Friday and Saturday are included with your registration. For more information, and to purchase tickets, please visit our webiste: www.LSConference.org.

We hope to see you there! //

Darren Gagnon, along with his wife, Stacey, are the founders of Lost Sparrows. They can be reached at P.O. Box 751, Winona Lake, IN 46590.

Learn more about Lost Sparrows at www.lostsparrows.org.

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Darren and Stacey Gagnon, founders of Lost Sparrows

SPEAKERS:

P LU S M

ANY M

ORE!

BRYAN POST, an adopted and former foster child, is one of America’s Foremost Child Behavior and Adoption Experts and founder of the Post Institute.

GEORGE DENNEHY, born without arms, has a very powerful message to share—he believes that every individual has a purpose and absolutely anything is possible.

GAELIN ELMORE spent over 10 years in the foster care system— experiencing physical, mental, and emotional abuse.

DR. DELL has a Bachelor of Science in Counseling and Master of Arts degree in Interpersonal Relations from Grace College, and his Doctor of Psychology degree from Indiana State University.

JOHN FULLER is vice president of Focus on the Family's Audio department, leading the team that creates and produces almost 20 audio programs and podcasts.

STACEY GAGNON is a foster mom, adoptive mom, blogger, educator, published children’s book author, a registered nurse, and an international speaker.

October 14–15 Friday + Saturday

Grace College Campus Winona Lake, IN

SCHEDULE:

FRIDAY, OCTOBER 14 7:30am – 9:00am

Check-In at Grace College

8:00am – 9:00am

Breakfast – Alpha Dining

9:15am – 10:15am

Opening Session – Brian Post

10:45am – 11:45am

Breakout Session 1 (5 choices)

12:00pm – 1:15pm

Lunch

1:30pm – 2:30pm

Breakout Session 2 (5 choices)

2:45pm – 3:45pm

Breakout Session 3 (5 choices)

4:15pm – 5:15pm

Breakout Session 4 (5 choices)

5:20pm – 6:30pm

Evening Session – George Dennehy

SATURDAY, OCTOBER 15 8:00am – 9:00am

Breakfast – Alpha Dining

9:00am – 10:30am

Opening Session – Gaelin Elmore

11:00am – 12:00pm

Breakout Session 5 (5 choices)

12:00pm – 1:30pm

Lunch

1:30pm – 2:30pm or 3:30pm

Breakout Session 6 (5 choices)

3:00pm – 4:00pm

Workshops

4:30pm – 5:45pm

Evening Session – Darren + Stacey Gagnon

$190 per Ticket

Breakfast + Lunch Included

LSConference.org Purchase Tickets Online

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WORDS BY

Robert Rogers with Merlin Erb

"He will wipe every tear from their eyes, and there will be no more death or sorrow or crying or pain.

All these things are gone forever.

And the one sitting on the throne said, ‘Look, I am making everything new.'"

REVELATION 21:4-5

IT WAS LABOR DAY weekend 2003, and we were returning to our home in Liberty, Kansas, from a family wedding. There were six of us in our minivan: myself, my wife Melissa, and our four children: eightyear-old Makenah Alexandra, five-year-old Zachary Seth, three-yearold Nicholas Adam, and one-year-old Alenah WenYing, whom we had recently adopted from China.

An unfathomable flash flood inundated our minivan on the Kansas Turnpike. It thrust our vehicle off the highway, plunged us into the deluge, and washed half of our precious family out the window while our youngest three were still strapped in their car seats. Miraculously, I survived.

“Mr. Rogers, we need to ask you to identify the bodies of your three youngest children. They are dead.”

Those piercing words from early Sunday morning, August 31, 2003, changed my life forever. Perhaps you can relate. You know at that moment life will never again be the same.

I identified our three youngest. Later my oldest child Makenah was found on a barbed wire fence nearby the van—a mile and a half from the turnpike. Three days later, they found my wife, my beloved Melissa. All I cherished most was gone: every dream, every hope.

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Life Before the Flood I met my wife in Massachusetts. In March of 1989, I returned to Digital Equipment Corporation in Boston for my engineering job. The year before, I happened upon a gentleman outside Lily’s Café delighting a crowd on a baby grand piano. When he took a break, I offered to fill in for him; from there, it was history. I loved to fill the cobblestone sidewalks with music.

When I returned to my job, I also resumed playing piano at Lily’s during my breaks.

One warm spring Saturday afternoon, an attractive blond stopped by while I was playing. I was instantly smitten. Before she left, I gave her my business card. Melissa, from Kansas, was working as a nanny in Boston, but I had no way to contact her. I could only hope she would return, which she did. Unbeknownst to me, Melissa returned to the square numerous times that summer to observe me playing from a distance.

When I returned to college that fall, I got a card from her with a poem she’d written for me titled “The Piano Man” while listening to my café music. Soon the romance was underway, and we got married on New Year’s Eve, 1991.

Our first crisis occurred during the birth of our first daughter. Makenah was scheduled to be a home water birth, but after 48 hours of hard labor, a C-section was performed. Thankfully all ended well. We learned a valuable lesson: Even though everything that happens to us is not always good, God can still bring good out of everything that happens to us (Romans 8:28). Makenah’s difficult delivery was an experience that drove us deeper in our faith.

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"Even though everything that happens to us is not always good, God can still bring good out of everything that happens to us..."

Our son Zachary was born after a normal delivery, but within hours my wife and I were told, “We believe your son has Down syndrome.” We were speechless, and Zachary was whisked off to Children’s Mercy Hospital for heart and bowel complications. Zachary was also autistic. Such pressures often cause marriages to break up. But for us, Zachary galvanized our marriage instead of tearing us apart, bringing Melissa and me closer to each other and God. Unknown to me, we were being prepared by our years of crying out to Him in our deepest pain. During childbirth, during Zachary’s surgeries, during Down syndrome complications, we cried out to Him. As our family grew, we gave our struggles to God during Nicholas’ birth and Alenah’s adoption. Through marital woes, amid months of more bills than paychecks, and enduring all sorts of trials, we made it through because we turned to God rather than away from God. In those times of deepest pain, we grew to know and receive God’s presence when nothing made sense, which ultimately revealed God’s deepest and most intimate loving nature.

A quick family photo at the wedding reception before their fateful drive home in 2003

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