SEVEN: Life Lessons from Sports (Spring 2020) - Issue 71

MEN / GOD / LIFE SPRING 2020 / ISSUE 71 NEWSSTAND PRICE CDN $4.95

POWER OF PRAYER EXCLUSIVE INTERVIEW WITH NHL'S MARK SCHEIFELE

LIFE LESSONS FROM

Sports

FEATURE

POWER O

Prayer INTERVIEW WITH THE JET’S MARK SCHEIFELE

BY CARTER BROOKS

Photos by James Carey Lauder

2 SEVEN SPRING 2020

OF

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Star centreman Mark Scheifele of the Winnipeg Jets spoke with SEVEN Magazine’s Resident Sport Writer, Carter Brooks, on a wide array of subjects stemming from his life as a Christian athlete, his involvement in the church, and the NHL’s chapel program, while also diving deeper into questions surrounding decision-making and the temptation he faces while attempting to live a God-pleasing lifestyle. The seven-year pro currently has 174 goals and 427 points to his name in 501 career NHL games.

CAN YOU TELL ME HOW LIFE AS A YOUNGSTER LOOKED GROWING UP IN KITCHENER AS A CHRISTIAN? “It was pretty much church every Sunday. I had an older brother and an older sister, so we had sports and stuff like that, but it was pretty much church every Sunday, and obviously, when we were younger, it was Sunday school or youth group. We went to a Baptist church, Grandview Baptist Kitchener, and it was pretty much church every Sunday – the whole family would go. It was a pretty constant ritual for us.”

AS A YOUNG ATHLETE, DID YOU EVER HAVE ANY SPORTS-RELATED SCHEDULE CLASHES ON SUNDAYS? “If we had hockey, it would usually take precedence. Obviously, our parents pay a lot of money to put us in sports and to get us through, so we were very conscientious of that. But luckily, we would only have three or four tournaments a year in which we would play on a Sunday. So if we had a game at six or seven o’clock on a Saturday night, we would still be able to go to church in the morning.

There weren’t too many services that were missed, but we definitely would go to our sport if it happened to be on a Sunday morning.”

WHAT WAS THE CONNECTION TO GRANDVIEW – WERE YOUR PARENTS RAISED IN THE BAPTIST CHURCH? “We were actually at a different church when we were

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really young, and then we moved churches a few years later. It was more so about finding the right fit for our family, and the right community. When we went to Grandview Baptist, we really liked the community; a lot of friends went to that church. My parents also really liked the pastor at the time. It was just a really good fit for our family, and we really enjoyed the services and the messages, and they had a great youth program. So for my brother and sister, it was a good program for us to go to and be with kids our age. It was just the right fit for our family.”

ARE YOU/YOUR PARENTS STILL MEMBERS AT GRANDVIEW? “Yes, they are still there. Every once and awhile, I am able to get back there. Obviously, I am not home a ton, but I definitely do pop in on Sundays when I am around.

When I was home for Christmas a few months back, I definitely was there for the Christmas Eve service. When I am home, I try to get back there as much as I can.”

DID YOUR FAITH BACKGROUND PLAY A SIGNIFICANT ROLE WHEN GROWING UP PLAYING JUNIOR HOCKEY AND/OR WHILE TAKING YOUR FIRST STEPS AS A PROFESSIONAL? “I think I definitely struggled through junior and even the first year of my NHL career. I wouldn’t say I got away from

I got sent down for the second time in Winnipeg I was kind of going through a tough time. My faith kind of took a hit, until I met this Dave Whitelaw. It wasn’t even really chapel, because we didn’t really have many Christians on our junior team or guys that wanted to do chapel, so just the two of us would meet for lunch once a week and just kind of talk. He helped bring me back to my faith and with my struggles, even if they weren’t faith-based. We ended up having a few more guys who would join us for lunch, and we had a good little talking group going there. Since being with Winnipeg, our chaplain Lorne Korol has been awesome for me in keeping the faith strong. We have a pretty good group of guys here in Winnipeg and having that community helps.”

AS A YOUNG PROFESSIONAL IN THE SPORTING WORLD, TRAVELLING THE CONTINENT WITH LOTS OF MONEY AT YOUR FINGERTIPS, THERE HAVE TO BE IMMENSE LEVELS OF TEMPTATION… HOW ARE YOU ABLE TO KEEP YOURSELF ON TRACK WHEN LIVING A LIFESTYLE THAT IS VERY DIFFERENT THAN YOUR AVERAGE TWENTYSOMETHING-YEAR-OLD? “It is definitely a struggle not to give in to that temptation.

I’d say praying is a big one for me, just calming down and saying a prayer. Lorne calls it shooting an ‘arrow prayer’ to God, to help you out in a certain situation or with something you’re thinking about or struggling with.

That has helped me a lot; prayer has been a big one. I get a devotion sent to me by Lorne every day, and that helps a lot. It’s just some sort of lesson or thought put into your mind at the start or end of every day and it kind of keeps you strong, but it definitely is tough. I’d be lying if I said I’m perfect.

I’ve made my mistakes and I’ve gone through those growing pains, but Lorne and I talk about it a lot.

That clean slate that God gives us is a huge thing. We are able to ask God for forgiveness and be given that clean slate; just having that thought in your mind really it – I still had my faith, but I kind of got away from going gives you a good sense of peace. Knowing that to church, praying on a regular basis, reading devotions, you have Him with you no matter what you’re going to chapel… I’d be lying if I said I was the best in terms going through, or what you’re struggling with, of my faith. There was actually a guy by the name of Dave you can pray and God’s there to help you at Whitelaw who served an important role in my life. When all times.”

“KNOWING THAT YOU HAVE HIM WITH YOU NO MATTER WHAT YOU’RE GOING THROUGH, OR WHAT YOU’RE STRUGGLING WITH, YOU CAN PRAY AND GOD’S THERE TO HELP YOU AT ALL TIMES.”

YOU MENTIONED DEVOTION AND PRAYER AS A PART OF YOUR ROUTINES – HOW DO THEY COME INTO PLAY? “Yeah, I wake up and read the supplied devotion. I find it very comforting to have something to read and have something to think about throughout the day. I think it keeps your mind on that and keeps you humble. It helps you with keeping that faith strong while putting yourself in a good headspace. For prayer, it kind of depends on the last chapel that we had or the past devotion that I read, as I will typically refer back to that. Sometimes it’s just saying thanks, while other times it’s praying for someone. I think that time spent with just you and God is very valuable time to reflect and be yourself with Him.”

IN PLAYING A CONTACT SPORT FILLED WITH AGGRESSION, DO YOU KEEP YOUR FAITH SEPARATE FROM YOUR ON-ICE ACTIONS? HOW DO YOU JUSTIFY PLAYING CONTACT SPORTS AS A CHRISTIAN ATHLETE? “In our minds as athletes, I don’t think anything we do out there is done in a malicious way. Much like in football, it’s

WHAT DOES A TYPICAL WINNIPEG JETS CHAPEL LOOK LIKE? “It’s kind of different every time. A lot of guys here have obligations that they must fulfill, both professionally and personally, which sometimes coincide with when we have a chapel. I’d say it’s usually between four and seven guys on our team. Usually, Lorne has a good set of lessons every day and we talk about them. Right now, we are watching a bit of a series, so we watch a 10-minute clip about someone’s journey, reflect on it, talk about it, bringing forth what we think we can take from the video.

We obviously also have prayer requests, as we all know someone—whether it be a family member or friend—who is dealing with something, so we pray for them. It’s a very simple thing, but having that community around you, that fellowship, the friendship that you have with those guys, it’s very comforting to have those guys that you can lean on in the tough times, but also share that joy with you in the good times.”

HOW OFTEN DO YOU GET TOGETHER FOR YOUR TEAM CHAPELS? “Usually, we try to get together once a week. Depending on our schedule, some months can be much trickier than others, but I’d say we for sure meet up once every two or three weeks. Then again, just looking at our January schedule, where we were home for an extended period of time, we had two chapels in one week, so it does vary a bit according to our schedule.”

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not done in a way of hurting someone or trying to injure someone. We’re not acting maliciously at all; it’s more out of passion. Our actions tend to come from the passion and love of the game. That’s kind of why it’s happening, and that’s how I think Christian athletes are able to deal with it, as it’s out of love for the sport. With the platform that athletes are given, you really are able to shine your light in that way.”

IS THERE ANYONE WHOM YOU TRY TO MODEL YOUR MINDSET OR BEHAVIOR AFTER, OR SOMEONE WHOM YOU THINK DESERVES SOME CREDIT FOR HELPING SHAPE THE WAY YOU ARE? “I’d just say it all comes back to my family. My parents, my brother, my sister—they are the ones I really look up to.

They are the ones I rely on in those times. I think it was just the way I was raised. I am really lucky to have grown up with the parents that I have had and the brother and sister that I have to support me and help me through the good and the bad times. I owe it all to them.”

/ CARTER BROOKS is a news writer and sports columnist situated in Winnipeg, Manitoba. On top of reading and writing, coaching hockey is his favourite pastime. Carter can be reached at carterbrooks1994@gmail.com.

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PK PODIUM

EXTERNAL INVESTMENT

FEATURES

SPORTS REVEAL WHAT MEN ARE CAPABLE OF

02 Power of Prayer

BY KIRK GILES

14 Giving up the Dream 18 Picked Last 24 Dear Coach

I

have learned more about men by watching sports than perhaps any other sphere of life or any book I have read.

As someone who lives near Toronto, the last year has been a mixed bag if you are a sports fan. The Toronto Raptors won the NBA championship, and we were on top of the world. The Maple Leafs lost a game to a Zamboni driver who played goalie for the Carolina Hurricanes, and the whole city was ready to throw themselves off the top of a mountain.

There are times when I wonder why men have so much energy for sports and not nearly as much for their walk with God. Rather than looking at this from a negative perspective, I want to encourage us to see the positive potential that exists in men— including you.

We love to be part of a winner. When there is a winning team, men will rally around it. We become very emotional and heavily invested in seeing our favourite team win. It is not uncommon to hear language like “we won the game” even though “we” weren’t the ones playing the game.

Maybe part of the reason we can be more invested in sports than God is that we are not convinced God is the winner. Imagine how much it would change our lives if we believed we were on the winning team.

We are capable of celebrating and singing.

One of my most proud moments as a Canadian was the 2010 Olympic games

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and the hockey gold medal. There was an incredible party that happened in every corner of the nation when we (there I go again) won that hockey game. Canadians sang our national anthem loud and proud. When it comes to our spiritual lives, I hear people say all the time that men don’t sing or show excitement because it’s not part of our culture to be expressive. I call that an excuse. We are capable of celebrating and singing. Fortunately for us, Jesus is the victor, and his rewards are far greater than any Olympic medal.

We are capable of discipline and memorization. Some men can tell you every obscure statistic about their favourite athlete. Sports have taught me that men are capable of being disciplined to learn how to thrive in something. When men say they can’t memorize the Bible or be focused to spend time alone with God, it is simply not true. Men are capable; the question is whether we view God as worthy of that kind of effort from us.

In this edition of SEVEN we explore more about how sports can shape our lives as men who are seeking to follow Jesus. Ask God to show you how to take your investment in sports and turn it into an eternal investment.

COLUMNS 08 // PK Podium 28 // Sports Scene 30 // Out of My Depth 31 // Lives Worth Leading 32 // No Man Is An Island

DEPARTMENTS 10 // The Pulse 33 // Music Reviews 34 // Power Play

EDITORIAL Questions and comments regarding editorial can be sent to ssukkau@promisekeepers.ca, or mailed to Promise Keepers Canada at the address provided.

DESIGN DEVON WAGENAAR Devon J Andrew Design Inc. djadesign.ca PROMISE KEEPERS CANADA 210-3027 Harvester Road

/ KIRK GILES is the president of Promise Keepers Canada. However, his most important roles as a man are husband to Shannon and father to Carter, Joshua, Sydney and Samuel.

Burlington, ON L7N 3G7 (905) 331-1830 info@promisekeepers.ca

COVID-19

Dear Friends, As we face a historic moment in the world with COVID-19, I wanted to take a moment to update you on how this impacts the ministry of Promise Keepers Canada.

WE ARE DEEPLY COMMITTED TO: + Continuing to equip men for a life of purpose and godly impact. + Making decisions out of love for each other and the most vulnerable people in Canada.

THESE COMMITMENTS HAVE LED US TO: + Cancel all events up to Easter, as of the time of writing this update. It is likely that more events through the rest of the spring will also be cancelled. + Continue to provide online support for men, including our daily devotional, podcast, magazine, and This Is Me TV. + Ramp up the development of new ways to support men digitally – especially during a time of social isolation. You can visit our website for more information. + Stay connected with church network leaders across Canada in order to support them in their efforts to stand with the men in their communities.

This edition of SEVEN magazine was prepared before the reality of COVID-19 came to Canada. While sports have taken a hiatus, the lessons we can still learn from them are profound. Be encouraged and equipped as you work your way through the articles.

Please pray for each other as men and for the ministry of Promise Keepers Canada during this challenging season.

Kirk Giles

THE PULSE

BITS / BLIPS / BEATS / BLURBS THE LATEST NEWS FROM PROMISE KEEPERS CANADA

BITS / BLIPS / BEATS / BLURBS

TANNER’S STORY — FINDING FREEDOM

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/ WHAT HAPPENS WHEN a porn-addicted, samesex attracted man encounters God in the presence of other godly men?

In October 2015, Tanner Grinde found himself sitting with hundreds of other men at the Promise Keepers Canada Men’s Conference in Grande Prairie, Alberta. If you met him that weekend, you would have never known Tanner was living with the reality of same-sex attraction and a pornography addiction that had been going on for seven years.

As the event began, Tanner experienced something unique and powerful—the voices of men worshiping Jesus together! “It was incredible to listen to so many men singing worship songs. On top of that, every speaker was so vulnerable, talking honestly about the struggles of being a man and the grip of sin in our lives. Promise Keepers Canada was a voice of hope when I needed it most. I remember the power of going to the front and praying with other men as we asked God to come into our lives.”

Following the event, Tanner knew he needed to “keep pursuing this God thing.” He joined a sex addiction group and asked another man to mentor him.

Tanner chose to remain single as he focused on his healing. “I kept pressing into the life God wanted for me.”

Along the way, Tanner also maintained a connection with Mauricio Rosa – a staff member with Promise Keepers Canada. Mauricio was another man who was able to speak into Tanner’s life and the journey God was taking him on.

Mauricio was teaching a workshop for men on “Understanding Your Identity” and brought Tanner with him to the event. Again, God used this time in a significant way to shape Tanner’s life and sense of who he is as a man, made in the image of God. Over time, God set Tanner free from his porn addiction and also from his same-sex attraction. Today, Tanner describes his experience with pornography and homosexuality as something that “attacked the identity and worth he has as a man.”

In 2017, God brought Margaret into his life.

Following a series of circumstances that can best be described as God at work, Tanner and Margaret entered into a relationship and were later married in 2019.

Tanner’s story is all about God’s power and grace to set men free. He is a living testimony to the reality of how Jesus is still setting people free two thousand years after declaring, “It is Finished!” >> Watch Tanner’s story at promisekeepers.ca/give

FROM KIRK'S BLOG HOW WOULD YOUR WIFE DESCRIBE YOUR FAITH? / “IF I WERE to ask your wife to describe your faith, what would she say?” I remember being asked this question by a mentor, and it stopped me dead in my tracks. It’s easy to put on the show of being a good Christian for everyone else because they only see you for a few minutes or a few hours at a time. It is a lot more difficult to fake your faith around your spouse. So, does your wife experience the reality of Jesus in you?

This question came to mind for me once again after I saw a quote from D.L. Moody posted on Facebook: “If I wanted to find out whether a man was a Christian, I wouldn’t go to his minister. I would go and ask his wife. We need more Christian life at home. If a man doesn’t treat his wife r ight, I don’t want to hear him talk about Christianity.”

— DL Moody Here are 5 ways to live as a faithful follower of Jesus in your marriage... >> Continue reading at: kirkgiles.com

THIS IS ME TV

STEVE BANCARZ DOCUMENTARY / HAVE YOU EVER tried to search for truth? It’s a loaded question, but one Steven was willing to take on.

After practicing mindfulness, lucid dreaming, tarot card readings, meditation, energy crystals, out-of-body experiences, psychedelics, and reaching out to other identities, Steven found himself at the lowest point of his life.

Along his truth journey, Steven amassed hundreds of thousands of followers and a +$50k/ month income from his website, but he had become the opposite of his teachings.

With a loss of direction, Steven embraced the one entity his new-age teachers instructed him to stay away from: Jesus.

His life changed. He gave up his mansion, his income, and started to teach about the reasons for Jesus. He found truth, and his life mirrors that today. >> Watch this episode and others at: Thisismetv.com

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PODCASTS LIBERTY FOR YOUTH WITH FREDERICK DRYDEN / EVERY MAN IS capable of having a godly impact in the world, and Frederick Dryden is a perfect example of this truth. Dryden’s story is one of poverty, bullying, abuse, gangs, and a broken family. However, through the grace of Jesus and the influence of other godly people, he has not been defined by what happened in his past.

In this podcast, we tell the story of a man who has overcome incredible adversity and is now helping to save the lives of at-risk youth through the ministry of Liberty for Youth.

No matter what your story is, God wants to shape you to be someone who has an incredible impact in this world.

Listen to this incredible story and share it with others who could use some encouragement today!

INTIMACY ANOREXIA WITH DR. DOUGLAS WEISS / YOU’VE HEARD OF someone having anorexia, but have you ever heard of intimacy anorexia? Our guest for this edition of the podcast is Dr. Douglas Weiss from Heart to Heart Counseling in Colorado Springs. We will be exploring the topic of intimacy anorexia and how it results in relationships that are marked by pain and loneliness.

Intimacy anorexia is a relationship disorder characterized by a lack of emotional, physical and spiritual intimacy in the relationship. It occurs when someone actively withholds emotional, spiritual, and/or sexual intimacy from their spouse or partner.

IN THIS PODCAST, DR. WEISS WILL HELP YOU: + Understand the causes surrounding intimacy anorexia + Know what signs to look for in your relationship + Have a conversation with your spouse about intimacy anorexia + Discover tools available to help you move forward >> Find these and other podcasts at: promisekeepers.ca/podcast

12 SEVEN SPRING 2020

DAILY DEVOTIONAL START YOUR DAY WITH GOD’S WORD Each morning we’re drawn to our smartphones and technology, leaving so little time to hear the voice of God. The daily devotional helps thousands of men start their day with God’s Word and insights from godly teachers. Have the daily devotional sent straight to your inbox each morning to set the course for each day. >> Sign up for the daily devotional at: promisekeepers.ca/devotionals

SURVEY SEVEN MAGAZINE READERS SURVEY Thank you for being a subscriber to SEVEN magazine. We want to see this magazine continue to be a great tool for men like you and would like your input.

>> Would you please take 2-3 minutes to give us your feedback and complete the survey found at this link: prms.ca/seven

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SPRING 2020 SEVEN 13

FEATURE FEATURE

GIVING UP THE

DREAM

BY FRANK STIRK

I

“

t was a clean hit. He was a big boy.

He was six-foot-seven, and I’m sixfoot-three. My head snapped back against the glass,” says Edmonton resident Matt Cline, recalling the concussion he received in October 2006 playing for the Chilliwack Bruins of the Western Hockey League. At eighteen, he was one of his team’s top players with a good shot at getting into the NHL. At first, Cline figured he’d soon get back in the game. “It wasn’t one of those concussions where I was in the hospital and unconscious,” he says.

“We thought I’d be out for maybe a week or two.” But when recurring headaches forced him to miss training camp the following year, he knew that his dreams of hockey greatness were over.

Cline says the sting of missing the

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NHL was one that took a while to fade.

“The hardest part for me was not being able to reach my potential. I always wondered how good I could have been. In those two years after I got hurt, I had a really hard time watching hockey because I’d be seeing guys that I had played with or against moving on to realize their potential, and I knew that I wouldn’t be able to.

Whether I ended up playing pro or not, I just had a hard time not knowing what my peak potential was.”

What he didn’t know was that God would use his injury to chart a very different course for his life.

“I knew nothing other than hockey at the time of my injury, but I did always trust God to lead me even when I had no clue what to do. After I got hurt, I opened my Bible randomly to Matthew 6 and read where it

says, ‘Do not worry, for who of you by worrying will add a single hour to your life?’ This became my life verse, and it gave me peace beyond understanding.”

Today, Cline, who’s now thirty-two, heads up Restored, a Christian ministry he started that helps people overcome their addiction to pornography. Cline himself used to be a porn addict. He got hooked when he was only eleven and was well into his twenties before he finally got clean for good. Cline knows first-hand how easy it is to let porn get inside your head—and how hard it is to break free.

Due in large part to the explosion of social media, long gone are the days when boys would sneak a peek at Playboy centrefolds by flashlight under the covers. With online porn now just a few clicks away, the

THIS IS ME TV CHECK OUT MATT’S STORY IN OUR UPCOMING EPISODE OF THIS IS ME TV. VISIT

ThisIsMeTV.com

number of young children exposed to porn—and becoming addicted to it— has soared. And that includes many church-going Christians.

“We are looking at a sexuallyaddicted, pornography-is-normal society,” Doug Weiss, the executive director at Heart to Heart Counseling Center in Colorado Springs, Colorado, told a Promise Keepers Canada podcast in 2017. “Look at the teen magazines, television. Look at the internet—huge pornography views.

It’s become like just part of our culture, part of what we do.”

How bad is it? In a 2003 survey of porn consumption among children in Alberta, Edmonton sexual health consultant Sonya Thompson polled 425 students in Grade 8 across the province, as part of her research toward a master’s degree. Eighty-

eight percent of boys and seventytwo percent of girls said they had seen sexually explicit content online. And thirty-five percent of boys said they had seen porn too many times to count. That was seventeen years ago, and those percentages are probably a lot higher by now. But no one knows, because no further studies have been done on the subject since then, at least in Alberta.

“It’s just crazy to me that we don’t know what things look like now,” says Thompson. “This stuff is everywhere.”

Cline’s long journey toward victory over porn began about a year after being forced to hang up his skates. When he was twenty, he started some small businesses with the intent to become an

SPRING 2020 SEVEN 15

entrepreneur. Then he had the idea of starting a ministry to combat porn in the church, once he’d become established in the business world. At twenty-one, Cline quit looking at porn. But that didn’t work out too well.

“What I held on to,” he says, “was that I wanted to be free from porn for when I dated a girl and got married. A few years later, I fell into porn again, and I was hooked really more than ever. It was such a struggle the second time.”

But now Cline was praying that the Lord would give him something stronger to hold on to that wouldn’t fail. “I also prayed that I wanted to be used by Him,” he says. “Then I was in a church service and the Lord said to me, ‘Matt, I can’t use you until you’re pure.’ I went, ‘That’s what I need to hold on to.’ I was twentyfive—and I’ve been free ever since.”

S h o r t l y after, the Lord visited Cline again. “It was just before I was twentysix,” he recalls. “I was in my room one night, and literally I felt the presence of God. He said, ‘I want you to start this ministry. I want you to help people get free from pornography and stay free forever.’ I said, ‘Now?’ And He said, ‘Yes. I want you to start it now.’ It was a powerful experience.”

And so was born Restored Ministries. But Cline admits that at first, he needed it as much for himself as for others.

“I thought that because I had been called, obviously now I’m free, I’m good. But then temptations started coming back in my life,” he says. “Then I thought - I can’t hold on to this call to be my foundation. I had to start learning things like how to be thankful in a moment of temptation because I’m rooted in Christ. That’s the difference between the first time I got free and this time.”

Restored’s programs include live events, workshops for parents, workshops for youth groups, one-on-one coaching, and an annual Victory Conference in Edmonton with another in Ottawa this year for the first time. Perhaps its most popular offering is an eight-session, online boot camp that more than 2,800 people globally have taken part in so far.

“The premise of it is to train yourself in godliness,” Cline says. “The first session is changing the neurology of your brain and rewiring and understanding the damage that’s been done, and how Scripture is a guidance in that.

The second session is understanding your identity in

16 SEVEN SPRING 2020

Christ. That becomes kind of the theme throughout the whole rest of the boot camp because identity plays into everything. There’s a lot about understanding yourself and understanding why you do what you do, then finding healing and having a game plan moving forward so that then you can continue being free forever.”

A new program that Clines hopes to launch this spring is called Pure Freedom. “That’ll be a monthly subscription kind of thing,” he says. “There’ll be a hundred teaching videos, conference calls, and small groups. It’ll be really big.”

As much as it can, Restored tries to reach out to both men and women who are struggling. “A couple of years ago,” Cline says, “the biggest porn site said that a third of their searches came from women. We don’t think it, but it’s out there. When we do events, a lot of women come.

Some come because their husbands are struggling, but a lot of them are really open. In their feedback forms, they’re talking to us about their addiction. We definitely see it a lot.”

The statistics back that up. A recent survey of Americans found that thirty-three percent of women aged 25-and-under searched for porn at least once per month.

As well, eighty-seven percent of self-identified Christian women said they have watched porn. It also found that pornography use increases the marital infidelity rate by more than three-hundred percent.

Cline says while there is a lot of work to do—such as building a team of teachers and counselors to come alongside him—he believes Restored is on the cusp of helping potentially thousands of people craving freedom from a life controlled by pornography.

“The boot camp’s already gone around the world. But the new program, Pure Freedom, is going to be even bigger than that,” he says. “I see Restored as a tool that’s going to equip Christians and churches on how to deal with this issue. And I see that being something that can for sure be all over North America, if not globally.”

While giving up hockey was a painful sacrifice, Cline says those “what if?” moments while watching hockey highlights are fleeting in light of God’s plans.

To guys struggling with bitterness and their dream ending, he says to look back and thank God for the ride they went on in their sport. “Then I would encourage them to not be bitter at God for having a dream end, but draw close to Him knowing that if He really is good and your dream ended, imagine what more He has in store for you.”

TO LEARN MORE ABOUT RESTORED MINISTRIES, GO TO: >> restoredministries.ca

/ FRANK STIRK is a journalist living in North Vancouver, BC. He is the author of Streams in the Negev: Stories of How God is Starting to Redeem Vancouver (Urban Loft).

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SPRING 2020  SEVEN  17

FEATURE

PICKED LAST

BY MARC BRULÉ

O

“

h, okay. We’ll take Marc.”

I often heard that statement, with a sigh attached, when we were picking teams to play baseball or hockey in my childhood. Meet the geek. I wasn’t good at sports. I didn’t know the hockey players like my friends did. I was scrawny and uncoordinated.

We often played hockey on the street, in which case I was most often put in net, where stick handling was not really necessary. But here’s the real kicker—when we played hockey on the local frozen park pond, what position was I chosen to play?

Referee!

Yep, let’s let Marc watch the game with skates on so he can feel like he’s involved. It’s quite laughable now, but it wasn’t at the time. I did have things working against me. My skates were always hand-me-downs from my neighbour. By then, there was little support in the ankles, and they didn’t always fit.

I don’t want to sound like I’m crying the blues. What I can say is that those events had an effect on my selfperception. I had a definite sense of inferiority since all my friends were athletic, and I wasn’t. There was an expected norm—and I was the Frenchman that didn’t like hockey!

We live in a world filled with expectations. In sport, we place expectations on ourselves and others. The team expects everyone to do their best and perform well. The coach expects the individual to train and be prepared.

Parents want their child to be the next pro athlete in the sport. We all want to win.

18 SEVEN SPRING 2020

But what happens when expectations are not met?

What happens when expectations are not realistic? We can be hard on ourselves and others. More than that, we can begin to determine our value based on our performance.

I had one good experience in sports growing up. My grade seven and eight Phys Ed teacher was Mr. Lemer (pronounced Lemay). He put me on the basketball team in grade eight, which was a shock to me and likely to most of the other players as well. I was thrilled.

Me… Marc Brule... on a basketball team. Amazing!

I spent most of that season keeping the bench warm for other players. But I was still on the team! However, I had one of the most embarrassing experiences on that team.

We were in a tournament and it was the beginning of the third quarter. I had not played yet, so the coach put me on for a shift.

Unfortunately, I had forgotten we switched ends, so when the ball was passed to me, I began running toward our own basket and was stopped by a whistle blow. All the grade eight girls watching laughed, and I returned to the bench feeling totally embarrassed.

And so ended my basketball career.

Funny thing is, being on that team is a highlight to this very day. Why? The coach communicated to me that he saw more than the awkward kid who wasn’t any good at the game. He saw someone who had value and needed encouragement. I bumped into him forty years later, and we talked about it. He said he wanted to build me up in some way. We both knew I was not good at basketball. Yet

are great with tech. I see how all of them bring something to the table, and I value them simply because they are men that are serving God. They have worth because of who they are, not because of what they do.

In the world of sports, it is good to strive to excel. It is good to shoot to win. There can be healthy competition.

These things are not wrong. If they were, sports would be like watching grass grow (which is what watching golf is like to me!)

The danger lies in how we derive our value and communicate value to people in that context. If you are a coach, never forget that your players are people with intrinsic value first. If you are a player, remember that your teammates and your competitors are people with intrinsic value first. Also, remember that your value is not purely based on your performance. This concept is not limited to sports. The world is also filled with teams, coaches, competition, and failure. This is true in all of life.

Sports are just a microcosm of the larger realities of life.

So, if you are a leader, never forget that your team consists of people with intrinsic value first. If you work with others (which we all do at some point), remember he knew that including me would build something in me. that they all have value. And remember that you have As guys, we often wish we were what we are not. We value that is not based on your performance. want to be better at something than we are. We want “So you are no longer a slave, but a son, and if a son, to do what someone else can do. Our environment and then an heir through God.” (Galatians 4:7, ESV) the voices around us can reinforce those shortcomings.

The greatest gift you have received from God is not We end up focusing on our weaknesses instead of our your ability to play a sport, work a job, solve problems, strengths. We stop developing and or even raise a family. It is that through building our strengths because we faith in Jesus Christ, you are declared to THE GREATEST GIFT YOU HAVE are so focused on strengthening our be a son and an heir. This is where your RECEIVED FROM GOD IS NOT YOUR weaknesses. value comes from.

ABILIT Y TO PL AY A SPORT, WORK You need to do both. Build on your My coach earned our respect because strengths. What you are good at, get he communicated value to us. He took A JOB, SOLVE PROBLEMS, OR better. Bolster your weaknesses. us all out for Big Mac’s after we lost that EVEN RAISE A FAMILY. IT IS THAT What you are not good at—improve. tournament. And we never forgot how THROUGH FAITH IN JESUS CHRIST, Let me qualify that statement. If that felt, to know he valued us no matter it is a necessary skill, get it strong what.

YOU ARE DECL ARED TO BE A SON enough that it doesn’t sabotage your Whether you’re a husband, a father, AND AN HEIR. THIS IS WHERE YOUR strengths. Then keep on growing in a labour worker, an usher in church, VALUE COMES FROM. your strengths. I don’t waste my see yourself as a coach in life who sees time bolstering a weakness in an the value in people. Build them up. area that I do not need. (That’s why I don’t play golf!)

Communicate value to them. Show them that God values them, even if they were picked last on the playground.

LEARNING TO SEE VALUE IN EVERYONE

FUNCTION & VALUE

First Corinthians 12:21 says, “The eye cannot say to the hand, ‘I have no need of you,’ nor again the head to the feet, ‘I have no need of you.’” (ESV) Our value is not based on our function. My function is not one of sport; it is one of teaching and communicating.

I have guys in our church that are great with tools. Others

/ MARC BRULÉ is the Lead Pastor at WellSpring Community Church in Welland, ON and has served as National Worship Leader for Promise Keepers for 11 years. He's married to Wendy (34 years) and together have three children (Amy, Jonathan, Adam).

SPRING 2020 SEVEN 19

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SPRING 2020 SEVEN 23

FEATURE

24 SEVEN SPRING 2020

I L L FA R R E L L — B Y B —

DEAR COACH LESSONS THAT LAST A LIFETIME

SPRING 2020 SEVEN 25

WHERE WOULD I BE WITHOUT MY COACH? I asked a group of men recently, “What has another man said to you that had such an impact you’ve never forgotten it?” The responses amazed me at the theme they shared in common:

WORK HARD A coach in high school told me, “Hard work won’t take the place of your talent, but you will never enjoy the fullness of your talent if you are not willing to work hard.” I am sure my parents told me that my whole life, but it didn’t stick until my coach said it.

FOCUS My fifth-grade teacher, who also coached college basketball prospects, said to me, “You have an unusual ability to focus as a fifth-grader. If you keep developing that ability, you are going to go far in life.” Until then, I wasn’t very confident. His words caused me to look at myself differently.

DON'T BE AFRIAD My high school football coach told this to our team, but it felt like he was speaking directly at me. “Play free, men. Our coaching staff has chosen you for your position because we believe it is where you can make the biggest contribution.

C

oaches—they can be inspiring, irritating, and impossible to please as they leave an indelible mark on our hearts. Why is it that the words of a coach have such a lasting impact? It is probably impossible to explain all the aspects, but there are several priorities in the Bible that are reflected in the actions of a coach.

GOD IS A COACH Coaches guide their players to function at a higher level than they would if they simply operated on their own.

During the Exodus, “By day the Lord went ahead of them in a pillar of cloud to guide them on their way and by

26 SEVEN SPRING 2020

We believe in you and have you where we want you. Don’t be afraid of making mistakes. Just play fast, play hard, and trust your training.” I have sought to “play free” ever since.

DON'T BE MEDIOCRE Wow, my football coach gave a similar speech, but it was a little more raw: “Men, be good at what you do, or be bad at it. Just don’t be mediocre!” We all laughed, but it hit me at a place deep within. I knew I had just heard the theme of the rest of my life.

COMPETE EVERY DAY Finding glory in my own imperfection was energized by my coach, who used to say over and over, “It’s the way you play the day you play.” He taught me that I am going to be spectacular on some days and very average on other days, but I need to compete every day.

When I have a bad day, I have learned to look forward because tomorrow may just be my best performance.

night in a pillar of fire to give them light, so that they could travel by day or night.” (Exodus 13:21). This is an amazing feat in the days before light bulbs. King David described God as one who “guides the humble in what is right and teaches them his way.” (Psalm 25:9).

Jesus demonstrated the priority of being a coach who guides His people when He said to His disciples, “But when he, the Spirit of truth, comes, he will guide you into all the truth. He will not speak on his own; he will speak only what he hears, and he will tell you what is yet to come.”

(John 16:13) In a practical sense, Jesus described the Holy Spirit as an “assistant coach” who helps us carry out the Creator’s game plan.

LIFE IS COMPETITIVE AND COACHES TEACH US HOW TO BE WINNERS At times the apostle Paul was relaxed as he encouraged people to rest in their faith and forgiveness. At other times, however, he was profoundly aware that life is an intense competition that must be won.

Paul told a collection of teammates in Philippi, “Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.”

(Philippians 3:13-14) To the believers in Corinth who had grasped their freedom in Christ, he challenged them to remember, “Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize.”

(1 Corinthians 9:24) The writer of Hebrews describes our lives as a race that was run by others before us who are now cheering us on. “Since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith.” (Hebrews 12:1-2) Coaches help us identify “our race” and the skills that will help us “run with endurance.”

effectively. We weren’t even allowed on the court until these “details” were right.

He summed it up with the words, “You can’t be great at a complex feat like an athletic competition if you aren’t first great at the preparation it takes to arrive at the game.”

Even today, when I have to exercise self-discipline to have regular devotions, develop a private prayer life, serve my wife and kids, as well as address all the little details it takes to run a church or business, I find motivation in the fact that coach Wooden would be proud.

Many of you have this same impact on others. You are

LIFE IS A TEAM SPORT Coaches coordinate the actions of each member so the team can function efficiently. Coaches develop skills and stamina. Coaches assign positions based on abilities. Coaches lay out game plans so a team of athletes can operate as one. This is a ref lection of God’s plan for the church.

“There are different kinds of gifts, but the same Spirit distributes them. There are different kinds of service, but the same Lord. There are different kinds of working, but in all of them and in everyone it is the same God at work.

Now to each one the manifestation of the Spirit is given for the common good.” (1 Corinthians 12:5-7) In other words, we are all one team and our coach has assigned us positions so we operate better together.

I had the privilege of participating in a training project with John Wooden, the renowned coach of the UCLA Bruins. He was a quiet man who was significantly shorter than the men he directed. His presence, however, was larger than everyone in the room.

In the short amount of time I spent with him, I was exposed to the fact that great accomplishments are made up of a lot of little steps. Before he would teach us how to play basketball, he made sure we had the proper socks, our shoes were tied correctly, and we had warmed up

a coach, and others look up to you. They gain confidence from your presence and evaluate decisions based on their experience with you. Your inspirational words, instructive guidance, and intense example form a constant influence that helps them be a better version of themselves.

I would venture to say that all of you can credit your success in some important aspect of your life to the impact of a coach. Find time to say, “thank you,” to him, and describe the way your life has been improved by his dedication. If you aren’t able to connect with this coach, thank God for putting him in your life at just the right time to make you a better competitor in the game of life.

/ BILL FARRELL, along with his wife, Pam, have authored more than 40 books, including their best-seller, Men Are Like Waffles, Women Are Like Spaghetti, Red Hot Monogamy, The 10 Best Decisions a Man Can Make and 7 Simple Skills for Every Man. Bill is helping men learn how to be wiser in leading their lives, their families and their circles of influence. He has a unique ability to make biblical principles simple and practical so the average man knows how to live them out in his daily life.

SPRING 2020 SEVEN 27

SPORTS SCENE

GIRL DAD

KOBE BRYANT LEAVES A LEGACY OF FATHERHOOD

BY CARTER BROOKS

O

n the morning of Sunday, January 26, the world tragically lost a wellknown public figure in Kobe Bryant. The “Black Mamba” was known to many as a basketball star, to others as a voice of reason, and to plenty as a father – or “girl dad,” as Bryant liked to call it. Although owning many league and franchise records, the 41-year-old did, however, have his fair share of doubters, critics, and naysayers.

The story of Kobe Bryant is one of an immediate rise to stardom, some discouraging, drawn-out, personal struggles with the law, followed by a longlasting legacy, all before an early, unexpected, tragic death, alongside his 13-year-old daughter Gianna (Gigi).

28 SEVEN SPRING 2020

KOBE AND GIGI Bryant left their Newport Beach home just after 6:00 AM Sunday and made their way to the Cathedral of Our Lady Queen of Angels for a morning prayer chapel, before participating in 7:00 AM Catholic Mass and receiving communion. From there, the two met up with a few of Gigi’s teammates, parents and coaches at John Wayne Airport in Orange County before loading into a Sikorsky S-76B helicopter shortly after 9:00 AM for a Mamba Sports Academy tournament in Thousand Oaks.

The first 9-1-1 call from the Calabasas crash site came at 9:47 AM, where all nine passengers— including trusted pilot Ara Zobayan— were pronounced deceased on arrival. Having been granted special permission to fly on a foggy morning, Zobayan allegedly lost control of the aircraft while attempting to climb to a higher altitude, where the helicopter plummeted into a nearby hillside at a speed of over 2,000 feet-per-minute.

The sudden news of Bryant’s death sent shockwaves across the entire sporting world, stemming mainly from his love for his wife Vanessa and the couple’s four daughters, to his vast involvement in the growth of women’s basketball, as well as his strong, Catholic faith.

Despite much of the attention going towards Kobe and Gigi—by way of thousands of social media tributes —information was also released and widely publicized on the other victims aboard the helicopter January 26.

The girls’ basketball coach Christina Mauser, players Alyssa Altobelli and Payton Chester, as well as parents John and Keri Altobelli, and Sarah Chester all succumbed to injuries sustained in the wreck.

One of the many touching tributes to Bryant was made by SportsCenter anchor Elle Duncan, who reflected upon a run-in with Kobe while she

was pregnant with her daughter in 2018.

“I asked him for advice on raising girls,” Duncan said.

“Seeing as though he quite famously had three at the time, and he said just to be grateful that you’ve been given that gift because girls are amazing… His third daughter, Bianka, was about a year-and-a-half old at the time, so I asked if he wanted more children, and he said that his wife, Vanessa, really wanted to try again for a boy, but was sort of jokingly concerned that it would be another girl. And I was like, ‘Four girls, are you joking? What would you think?

How would you feel?’ And without hesitation, he said, ‘I would have five more girls if I could. I’m a ‘girl dad.’”

Bryant—a former NBA MVP—went pro after high school and played out his 20-year career with the Los Angeles Lakers—the team that acquired him from Charlotte after being selected in the first round of the 1996 NBA Draft. Donning both the No. 8 and No. 24 with the organization, Bryant rose to stardom rather quickly, earning five NBA championships, two Olympic gold medals, and two Finals MVPs through 20 full seasons of play.

However, it wasn’t always sunshine and rainbows for the 18time NBA All-Star. Early on in his NBA career, Bryant was accused of sexual assault on a hotel employee in Colorado. The case went to trial, proving cataclysmic for his image and reputation. Bryant adamantly denied the assault charges, which were eventually dropped as the accuser refused to testify, ending the court case without a conviction. He provided a public apology following the year-long legal proceedings.

Bryant played out the remainder of his career without incident, but that one dark blemish has often marred his success. Despite many of his numerous achievements coming

under the bright lights of the Staples Center in Los Angeles, some of the 6-foot-6, 215-pound shooting guard’s greatest accomplishments came outside of the basketball court.

Kobe and Vanessa Bryant had a 19-year marriage, four daughters, and a lifestyle complete with activity surrounding their children. Often spotted at sporting events with one or more of his kids, Bryant would be the first to sit down and talk strategy mid-game with audiences less than a quarter of his age. He was a philanthropic humanitarian, promoting education and providing financial support to less fortunate individuals through many of his foundations and various causes.

Bryant was also well-known as an experienced businessman in his many off-court endeavors.

“When I ref lect on this tragedy and that half hour that I spent with Kobe Bryant two years ago, I suppose that the only small source of comfort for me is knowing that he died doing what he loved the most: being a dad,’’ Duncan ref lected.

“Being a ‘girl dad.’”

/ CARTER BROOKS is a news writer and sports columnist situated in Winnipeg, Manitoba. On top of reading and writing, coaching hockey is his favourite pastime. Carter can be reached at carterbrooks1994@gmail.com.

SPRING 2020 SEVEN 29

OUT OF MY DEPTH

THE SPORTING TENSION

PRESSING ON TOWARDS THE TRUE PRIZE

BY PHIL WAGLER

T

he Kansas City Chiefs won wins make for tales told for years Super Bowl LIV. It was their first and nostalgic online searches for bat championship in fifty years. The flips or overtime heroics. It all points next day, before downtown Kansas City to the wonderful mystery within us. hosted its parade or most fans sobered We are made to celebrate, created to up, betting began on who would win overcome; human beings do not want the 2021 Vince Lombardi Trophy. to lose.

The Winnipeg Blue Bombers Where does that come from? It’s hoisted the 107th Grey Cup in 2019. part of the image of God in us. We even It was their first win since 1990— long to overcome the grave! It’s what the year of East and West German was won for us through Jesus Christ, reunification. If you can’t remember or as the old theologian Gustaf Aulen when Germany was East and West, summed Him up: Christus Victor. The chances are you won’t remember tense, anticipatory longing to win that when Tom Burgess erupts into thunderous quarterbacked either. ovation points to a larger SO, CHEER YOUR I’m a sports fan with celebration shouted by TEAM! LET EVERY a gift for remembering the Apostle Paul, “But VICTORY INSPIRE useless information, thanks be to God! He gives according to my lovely us the victory through A PRESSING ON bride. I recall random our Lord Jesus Christ” (1 TOWARD THE TRUE stats like Dave Collins Corinthians 15:57).

PRIZE IN CHRIST. stealing 60 bases for Sports, it seems to me, the 1984 Toronto Blue direct our vision upward Jays. (Yes, I actually remembered that!) to a greater victory that we all long for.

How can I conjure up such worthless After all, we seem to know that every items but struggle to memorize championship in this world is very, Scripture or know the name of that very, very fleeting. guy I see at church every week?

Sports—especially at its absolute Sports are enormously engaging pinnacle—are fleeting.

Winners and just as fleeting. This is the become next year’s target. Champions tension that both awakens a fire in get rings, but rings get auctioned, and us and simultaneously exposes our the people who laud the victors will shallowness. just as quickly boo if next year turns There is something beautiful, into a debacle. Sports remind us that unifying, and inspiring in sports. many of life’s expenditures can be Teamwork.

Overcoming odds. utterly and ultimately meaningless, as Amazing physicality. The thrill of the preacher of Ecclesiastes bemoans victory. The heart-wrenching, kick- (Ecclesiastes 1:1-2). in-the-gut defeats that make those Furthermore, when you add up victories so thrilling. Comeback the absolute injustice of the amount

30 SEVEN SPRING 2020

of money and time thrown at sports and the “idols” worshipped, it becomes even more distasteful. Stars make millions. The same fans that are screaming to sign a free agent, whatever the cost, can criticize a living wage for the poor or withhold generosity from churches and charities. Fans tweeting responses to a deadline trade seem unmoved by the plight of those suffering under political oppression – like East Germans were back in 1990 or as the Rohingya are today.

So, we sporting types live a dichotomous tension. While the desire to win is a window into God-imitating overcoming victory in life, community, and eternity, our often too-blind fascination with fandom is a troubling indicator of our unaddressed brokenness and unthinking callousness.

So, cheer your team! Let every victory inspire a pressing on toward the true prize in Christ (Philippians 3:14). And, when the losses mount, or the odds are stacked against your colours, wake up and repent of missing the mark and placing your hope and energy in all the wrong places.

/ PHIL WAGLER is North American Hub Co-ordinator for the Peace and Reconciliation Network and lead pastor of Kelowna Gospel Fellowship Church, BC. He’s also a Maple Leafs’ fan, so he’s had lots of opportunities to ponder the longing for victory and the wake-up call to what really matters.

LIVES WORTH LEADING

FOR HIS GLORY

JESUS IS LORD OF THE ARENAS AND FIELDS

BY COLIN MCCARTNEY

E

ver since I can remember, I have been in love with sports.

When the weather was good, you could find me with all the neighbourhood kids playing football, baseball, and soccer. In the winter, I was at the outside rink playing hockey every day, even on the coldest winter nights.

In high school, I played everything.

I was on the school basketball, volleyball, football and rugby teams.

Looking back on those days, I have to thank sports for keeping me from dropping out of school.

When I got married, I played in all kinds of men's leagues until I had kids. Once the children arrived, it was their turn to play and my turn to be their coach. This worked well until their skill level outgrew my coaching abilities, and I had to hand them off to someone else. All of this paid off in the end as my son went on to play Junior and University level hockey while my daughter received an NCAA Division 1 scholarship to play in the USA (Yay, free education!). For most parents, this is their athletic dream for their children, but most do not realize that it comes with a cost.

As my children advanced through the ranks of their sport, I saw some crazy stuff: parents pressuring and even bribing coaches so that their children could get extra playing time, NCAA coaches breaking rules to recruit my daughter, parents spending tons of money they do not have for their children to attend skills camps and clinics, fathers yelling at

their children after games because of how they played and these children crying due to the abuse they received from their dad.

I even know of one father that refused to buy his daughter lunch on a drive back from a tournament. He stopped to buy himself a meal, but he punished his daughter for making a mistake on the field by letting her go hungry while he ate in front of her! I also had to deal with an abusive coach at the highest level of one of my children's sports. This coach was emotionally and verbally abusive, pitting players against each other in order to motivate them. The result was that some players quit the team, others turned on each other, many had to go to counseling, and the coach was eventually fired.

Idolatry is best defined as allowing something other than God to control your life. With this in mind, it's safe to say the North American obsession with sports can be a destructive idol and can control people in negative ways. I admit that our experience raising athletes was, at times, stressful and even damaging, but the positives far outweighed the negatives.

I experienced countless opportunities to talk about Jesus to parents and children on my kid's teams. Some even came to faith. My son now coaches, runs hockey skills training camps, and is a fitness trainer.

My daughter finished her NCAA career, and the trials she faced on and off the soccer pitch helped develop her character. Both are following Jesus.

Ever since our children were born, we constantly reminded them that our calling as a family was to use all the gifts God has given us to His glory. If they scored the winning goal or were the reason why the opposing team scored the winning goal, it didn't matter to us. All that mattered was we did our best with what God had given us to serve others for His glory. This strong belief was what sustained us through it all. It was what kept our perspective pure and correct. It was a great lesson to teach our family that was proven and strengthened through athletic triumphs and defeats. It still is our purpose statement that echoes throughout everything our family does.

So, was it worth it? I would say yes, and it can be worth it for you too, as long as Jesus remains Lord over everything - including sports. If not, then the idol could destroy you and your family. The totality of our lives is to be surrendered to God - on and off the field. So, come out and play on God's team in bringing the wonderful kingdom reign of God wherever we go and in all we do.

/ COLIN MCCARTNEY is an ordained minister, speaker, and a bestselling author. He is also the founder of UrbanPromise Toronto and now leads Connect Ministries in Toronto where he, his wife Judith, and their two children reside. For information in booking Colin as a speaker, please visit connectministries.org.

SPRING 2020 SEVEN 31

NO MAN IS AN ISLAND

HOME SAFE

MARRIAGE IS A TEAM SPORT

BY NEIL JOSEPHSON

S

ports are huge in my family. our elbows up, take a number and My wife, our two sons, and I get even, to destroy and defeat the were all university other, to win at all costs, sports athletes, so we might be a difficult THE KEY IS you can imagine how person to be married to.

FORGIVENESS, much time was spent in We might need a new TO FORGIVE EACH gyms and rinks and on perspective —to think diamonds (and in the about marriage more OTHER JUST AS least expensive hotel like golf, specifically like GOD IN CHRIST we could find for all the a two-person scramble.

HAS FORGIVEN US. tournaments).

In this golf format, Sports taught us each player plays their profound life lessons about training own golf ball.

Then they decide and teamwork, about winning and together which ball is in the best losing, about owning the results of position for the next shot. Both play our effort and making peace with from there and once again mutually what we can’t control. decide which shot provides the best The insights we gained from a option moving forward. Like a great life of sports continue to shape our marriage, right? Two people working character and even our work with together, doing their best, sharing FamilyLife — strengthening the successes, and covering misplays. marriages and families of Canada.

Here are two sports analogies that A HEALTHY MARRIAGE IS MORE LIKE help me think better about marriage: BASEBALL THAN FOOTBALL Football is a game of field position.

A HEALTHY MARRIAGE IS MORE LIKE You don’t have to score on every GOLF THAN TENNIS possession; you just need to In tennis, only one player can win gain ground. If you do, scoring is each point. Either I get it, or you get inevitable. But when you are losing it. We are, in the sporting sense of field position, you are doomed. the word, enemies. The dynamic in Because field position is critical, golf is completely different. Unless teams fight for every yard, they dig in we play the game for a living, golf is and make every effort to resist being not played in opposition; it’s played moved—great characteristics for a side by side. In golf, we don’t have football team but pretty destructive enemies; we have partners. This in marriage. is the right attitude for marriage, I talk to lots of men who feel like but it can be difficult for highly they are pinned on their own goal competitive people. line in their marriage, who are either If sports have taught us to keep digging in or trying a desperate hail

32 SEVEN SPRING 2020

Mary play to get out of danger. And I encourage these guys to think differently about marriage—to think baseball and not football.

When you fail in baseball—let’s say you swing and miss—you get another pitch, another chance to do it right. If you don’t get a hit at bat, you get another turn in an inning or two, and even better, you start with a new count—no balls, no strikes—a true new beginning.

The key is forgiveness, to forgive each other just as God in Christ has forgiven us (Ephesians 4:32). We aren’t backed up to our end zone today because of the mistakes of yesterday, and we don’t back our spouse into the end zone either. Each day is a clean start, a new inning, a new at-bat, another pitch and a new opportunity to get it right. To love better, communicate better, care better, lead better.

And that my brothers, to make another baseball analogy, is how to get home safe.

/ NEIL JOSEPHSON is the National Director with FamilyLife Canada. Neil, together with his wife Sharol, lead FamilyLife Canada. Neil loves to learn, teach and write about anything related to marriage, family and Christian discipleship. Married since 1982, Neil and Sharol have two great sons, two awesome daugther-in-laws and three of the sweetest grandchildren ever.

MUSIC REVIEWS

BRAND NEW MATTHEW WEST Provident Label Group

/ YEARS AGO, I remember having that moment; you hear an amazing new song on the radio for the first time, and you are paralyzed.

You just have to know who is singing. I sat waiting, the radio volume cranked, waiting until the announcer answered my burning question: “That was by new artist Matthew West.”

I was hooked.

West has an incredible knack to write “radio gold” short and snappy pop songs that get stuck in your head. While that may seem like a knock against West, it’s not. It’s the mark of a great artist who knows his craft inside and out.

And incredibly, after more than a dozen

albums later, West returns with the same energy and commitment to music ministry as his first album.

On ‘What If’, it becomes clear why: “What if today’s the only day I got?/I don’t wanna waste it if it’s my last shot.”

Elsewhere on tracks like, ‘Walking Miracles’ and ‘Too Young Too Soon’ it’s clear West’s focus is not himself; it’s his audience. He’s truly inspired by the work God is doing through his music in other people.

If you’re looking for a safe bet, Matthew West is the easiest recomendation you’ll ever make to friends and family.

/ JOHN MARK MCMILLAN remains a creative tour de force.

Two decades into his career now, you can’t help but get swept up by his masterful grasp on the craft as he displays it through his lyricism weaving through genres, instruments, and musical techniques pulled from the past and the present.

One track sounds like 70’s pop, another a folk song akin to a Bruce Cobern classic, another PEOPLED WITH a modern worship song, and yet another that DREAMS sounds like it’s been pulled from the soundtrack JOHN MARK MCMILLAN to an epic movie.

2020 John Mark McMillan And then there’s my personal favourite, ‘Pilgrim’ which would feel at home on MTV in the

mid-2000s. To be clear, that is a compliment.

What ties everything together is McMillan’s voice which remains iconic, rugged, vulnerable, rumbling and deep. It’s married to imagery that is consistently vivid and apocalyptic, yet a romantic rumination on life and God that stick with you long after the song ends.

As he sings on ‘God is Young’, “God is young and maybe we’re the ones that grow old.”

While many were introducted to McMillan through mega-worship-hit ‘How He Loves,’ there’s so much more to explore in his discography. His latest album is the perfect place to start.

/ AFTER THE BREAKOUT hit of their EP, Switch returns with their first full album of the same name.

Rounding out the ten tracks are more of the same upbeat, catchy dance-pop fans were introduced to last year.

The secret sauce here is Switch’s four vocalists—two male, two female—that keep each song feeling fresh and different depending on the composition.

Title track, ‘Symphony’ is still just as infectious as it ever was, but the additions here more than live up to the pedigree.

‘Wild’ is a great new addition, opening the album with some bombastic dance beats while painting a startling picture of God’s love, “Like

a crash of thunder/Like a river tearing toward the sea/Your love is spilling over/Flooding every desert part of me.”

Elsewhere, new track ‘Overflow’ adds some techno vibes and showcases the vocal prowess of the group.

However, originally formed out of the multicampus Life.Church in Oklahoma, the group’s mission is more than just create popular music.

Speaking to CCM, TJ Murrell, who oversees worship and album production at the church, explains: “These songs will help people drown out what doesn’t matter so they can focus on Jesus. Our hope is that they play them in the moments where they feel out of control so they’re reminded of God’s grace.”

SYMPHONY SWITCH Dream Records

/ STEVEN SUKKAU works in radio on the prairies of Southern Manitoba.

SPRING 2020 SEVEN 33

POWER PLAY

TOYS / TOOLS / TECHNOLOGY FROM HERE TO THERE AND FUN ALONG THE WAY

BY SANDY MCMURRAY

LAFFITE X-ROAD SUPERCAR

// laffitesupercars.com The Laffite X-Road supercar is named for its designer, Bruno Laffite, the former Operations Director for Zarooq Motors. The design is a unique combination of sports car and off-road vehicle. Weird but cool.

The basic X-Road has a 470 horsepower GM LT3 V8 engine. The optional supercharged version has 720 horses under the hood, which you definitely will never need. You get 17 inches of wheel travel at every corner and a Dakar-ready Chromoly frame and suspension system. The luxurious interior features leather seats, carbon fiber, and aluminum.

I don’t usually get excited about sports cars, but I love the weird and chunky look of this one. Sad news for me, though: only 30 of these are slated for production, and pricing starts at $500,000 for the gas version, $545,000 for electric.

34 SEVEN SPRING 2020

HARLEY-DAVIDSON ELECTRIC SCOOTER

// harley-davidson.com

You might be surprised to learn that Harley Davidson is making electric scooters. You might think the company best known for shiny chrome pipes and leather-clad bikers is a bit out of its lane.

Not so. The introduction of the LiveWire scooter suggests that Harley Davidson is thinking about the future and exploring electric options. LiveWire was first introduced as a concept vehicle and is now available for purchase.

It looks like a Harley, but accelerates quickly and quietly, like a Tesla. There’s no clutch to release or gears to run, though. You get power instantly the moment you twist the throttle. Just flick your wrist to go. The 105 HP (78 KW) engine can go from 0-100 km/h in 3 seconds.

Use the onboard Level 1 charger and power cord to connect to any standard household outlet and get a full charge overnight. For a faster charge, visit any public Level 3 DC Fast Charge station for 80% charge in 40 minutes or 100% charge in an hour. You can travel for more than 200 km on a single charge.

LiveWire is available in a variety of colours, including an iconic orange and black. The removable battery pack is designed to look like the transmission case of another popular Harley model. Cruiser-style handlebars, a single halo headlight, hydraulic forks and spoked wheels complete the iconic look.

The price tag? A cool $40,000.

BLUICER PRO

// breville.com What do you get when you cross a blender with a juicer? A bluicer, that’s what. Fill Breville’s 3X Bluicer Pro with fresh fruits and vegetables. The juice flows down a chute and into the blender jug, where it combines with other ingredients to make smoothies, shakes, soups, and more.

This high-performance blender juicer features a contoured blade and bowl with an extra-wide chute. Patented Cold Spin technology protects the ingredients from heat as you juice. The Bluicer Pro can also be used as a standalone blender, with 5 one-touch programs and 10 precision controls.

The Bluicer Pro sells for about $500.

WOOD FIRED HOT TUB

// tubmarine.co.uk This beautiful wood-fired hot tub was a passion project. The designer wanted something different and stylish for his family to enjoy. The result was the Tubmarine.

The tub heats up in under two hours, provided you are a master of lighting fires. The Tubmarine is easy to maintain, requires no electricity, and is built using eco-friendly, high specification parts and materials.

Each tub has a Kirami water heater from Finland and is outfitted in a wood manufactured in the UK called Kebony. The tub can fit up to four adults comfortably and comes with a 25-year guarantee.

Custom designs are available on request. See tubmarine.co.uk for details.

MOJO VISION SMART CONTACT LENS

// mojo.vision

Is your TV screen too far away? Are you too cool to wear bulky glasses that show videos on the lens? Well, how about a system that displays images directly on your contact lenses?

A company called Mojo Vision presented their prototype “smart contact lens” at the Consumer Electronics Show in January. Mojo Lens embeds a 14,000 ppi display in a hard scleral lens that can display information without obscuring your vision.

“Everyone needs help remembering the street number of the next appointment, latest sales projections or what work order to complete first,” says the company. “Mojo Lens helps you remember what matters most during important moments and maintain focus on your priorities without burying your face in a screen or getting distracted by a mobile device.”

Like the heads-up display in a video game, Mojo Lens will be an “eyes-up” display that puts information right in front of you, no matter where you look. Developed by a team of optometrists, medical experts, and technologists, Mojo Lens will be available first to those with sight disabilities, then later to consumers.

Keep your eyes peeled for Mojo Vision, coming soon.

ULTIMATE WATER GUN

// spyraone.com Super-Soakers beware. The ultimate water gun is here!

The Spyra One is fine-tuned for power and precision. It fires “water bullets” that are exactly 30 ml—about the size of a shot glass. Water bullets make clear marks on the target, like paint gun pellets but clean and clear.

Modern water guns are as much about range as power. Spyra One delivers, clearly hitting targets up to 7.5 metres away.

The best feature might be the quick auto-refill. With the push of a button, Spyra One refills the entire tank in less than 15 seconds. Spyra One’s pumping system has a builtin water filter so that you can refill from any clean water source.

Counting your water bullets and planning when to refill becomes part of the game.

Spyra One’s digital display shows the exact number of water bullets left in your tank.

When you shoot, it counts down, and when you refill, it counts up again. This way, you never risk running dry in the worst moment.

Hold up—this needs a battery? Relax! The battery is rechargeable, and easily lasts for a full day of water fights with at least 45 refill cycles and 1125 shots.

The ultimate water gun is best suited for adults with credit cards. Each Spyra One sells for about $200.

THE BOOK OF BUILDING FIRES

// amazon.ca Building a perfect fire is an art. Ask anyone who has spent an evening arranging and rearranging logs and watching them burn.

The Book of Building Fires invites you to master the art of the perfect fire.

Straightforward directions and how-to illustrations teach you where to find the best wood, how to chop and store it, how to build and light it, and even how to cook over it.

Learn about stoves, hearths, types of wood, and how to smoke meat.

This slim volume will teach you how to start a great fire and make it last. If all else fails, the pages of the book will burn, and the textured spine doubles as a match striking pad.

This handsome book is—by definition—a great housewarming gift. At just 160 illustrated pages, you can burn through it in no time. Get your copy on Kindle.

36 SEVEN SPRING 2020

MORPHIE POWERSTATION GO

// zagg.com Morphie is a trusted name in mobile phone chargers. They make battery packs and phone cases with built-in battery packs. Morphie keeps you going when you’re nowhere near an electrical outlet.

The latest charger from Morphie does much more. Powerstation Go is a portable charger capable of jump-starting a full-size car or SUV. It has two USB ports for phone charging, Qi-enabled wireless charger, and a built-in three-prong AC outlet to power bigger devices like laptops.

Loaded with 44,000 mWh of power, it fits in the glove compartment and comes with a storage bag for the cables and accessories. Safety features include easy-to-read indicator lights, spark-proof cables, and automated safety checks. There’s even a built-in LED floodlight, so you can find your away around under the hood when needed.

The Powerstation Go sells for about $200.

JEEP E-BIKE

// jeepe-bike.com The first Jeep with two wheels is coming soon. The Jeep e-Bike is an electric all-terrain mountain bike designed for off-road adventures.

The e-Bike is built to live up to the Jeep name. The 750-watt Quietkat motor and 1.5 kWh battery give up to 40 miles of range, with enough power to master any trail. Fire-Link suspension front and rear with 4.8-inch fat tires give you flexibility and traction to spare, and hydraulic disc brakes provide plenty of stopping power.

The Jeep e-Bike is expected to ship later this year. See jeepe-bike.com for more information.

/ SANDY MCMURRAY writes about games, toys, and gadgets at funspot.ca.

FROM KIRK GILES

THE SEASONS OF FATHERHOOD WHY DADS MATTER AT EVERY STAGE OF LIFE

TERENCE ROLSTON, PRESIDENT OF FOCUS ON THE FAMILY CANADA

NEIL JOSEPHSON, NATIONAL DIRECTOR OF FAMILYLIFE CANADA

DR. RICK REED, PRESIDENT OF HERITAGE COLLEGE & SEMINARY

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