Brain Stew '17 / '18- Issue 4

BRAIN STEW EDITORS BARE ALL THEIR DIRTY SECRETS (or at least one each) Plus local memer Adam Thompson challenges Emma to draw him “through the eyes of a ficus.” The result is the...intriguing cover you see before you. Nicole tricks Dan into thinking Zach is straight. (lmao as if amirite boiz) Meagan Burwell crawls back to us after three whole issues of silence. Nicole goes cuckoo for pumpkin spice. We give you the low-down on what happened at trivia nite. Mike talks about headphones for a bit.

Emma treats us to (you guessed it, folks!) another prog rock album then cries bc no one submitted to her contest. (Boo! You should submit to more contests!) Zach gushes about (surprise, surprise!) gender & sexual minority representation in popular media. It’s fall, y’all—soup’s on!

What’s your favorite break fast cereal?

Mandy Bibee

Ann Torrusio

Dan Gerth

“Lucky Charms. Yeah, I said it! What’s the point of eating cereal if it’s not something so sugary that it has the potential to kill you every morning?

And of course I only eat the marshmallows. Who even likes the actual “cereal” part of Lucky Charms? Sometimes if I’m feeling super daredevilish I’ll mix in some hot chocolate mix with the cereal milk. Hot chocolate and marshmallows is a classic combination, why should those colorless mini-marshmallows get all the fun?”

“To me, oatmeal is the most rewarding and delicious cereal. Obviously if you use the instant stuff, then forget it, it's garbage. Go to Whole Foods and get some organic oatmeal. I would buy the small one, not the big things. Who needs giant oatmeal?

Scary!

Let's have normal-size oatmeal. If you want to do it The Ann Way, it’s one cup of oatmeal, one cup of water and one cup of milk, and that gives it a nice creamy texture. Don't put sugar in it, on it, or anywhere near the kitchen table. Throw all sugar in the trash immediately and then stop eating sugar and you'll actually get to taste things, like I can. I don't eat sugar -haven't eaten it in 15 years -- and that allows me to really taste things.

Believe me, everything with sugar in it tastes like sugar. So that's my favorite cereal. To make it better, get an organic banana to go with it.”*

“Cereal? Boo! If you think I don’t start off every single day with a 3-course Full-English breakfast, you’re wrong. I make sure to have everything: Pancakes, waffles, crêpes, French toast, scrambled eggs, fried eggs, omelettes, sausage, bacon, hashbrowns, parfaits, buttered toast, toast with jam, muffins, donuts, scones...and don't forget the biscuits and gravy. That’s all washed down with three mugs of black coffee and a glass of orange juice. No tea -- tea is for hippies! There’s no challenge in eating all of it; the only challenge is trying to make sure I don’t get any in my beard.”

*Ann's response was inspired by a quote from Steve Howe, guitarist of Yes, in a 2011 interview (https://goo.gl/8uvocZ)

SODEXO IS TURNING THE STUDENT BODY (ME) INTO ALEX JONES

This took, like 15 minutes to make (and it shows!) But the editors are not picky! It’s so easy to submit! Just let a stupid idea pop into your head and REALIZE IT. LIVE YOUR DREAMS! - Meagan

Scientists at Stanford University Invent AI Gaydar We can’t think of any non-evil application for this, says entire planet

A new facial recognition software program developed at Stanford University can identify someone’s sexual orientation from just a photograph. The AI had an 81% success rate with male photographs and a 74% success rate with female photographs. In the same tests, human judges answered correctly at 61% of the time for men and 54% of the time for females. Results have been published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology1, but Brain Stew was able to reach out to Stanford University for additional comment. The researchers, Michal Kosinski and Yilun Wang, provided us with the following statement: “We are thrilled with the results and look forward to further exploring the important questions that this research raises. For example, are lesbians sneakier than homosexual males? That’s one hypothesis to explain the 7% gap in scores between males and females. Lesbians don’t necessarily seem sneakier to us, but isn’t the point of sneakiness that you’re not noticed?

Anyway, there’s a lot of important stuff here. Also, we’ve been getting a lot of huge cash offers from fundamentalist churches and various foreign governments to purchase this program in order to increase persecution efficiency and ---Dan: Stop this for a second. What is this story about?

Nicole: Scientists at Stanford invented an AI that can identify sexual orientation from photographs.

Dan: Boo! Another damn robot that thinks it’s smarter than people. How many jobs is this robot going to steal?

Nicole: I don’t think anyone is employed in identifying sexual orientation.

Dan: Poor naïve Nicole. What do you think the Sorting Hat’s job was? You need to take Kate Votaw’s Harry Potter class.

Nicole: I don’t think that’s right, and even if it was, the Sorting Hat isn’t a person. Or real.

Dan: Irregardless – Nicole: Regardless –

1

This is true, as are the success rates. You can also read about the study in The Economist – one of those magazines that no one reads in the Common Room.

Dan: Stop talking! I’m tired of robots thinking they can drive our cars, run our homes, and now identify our homosexuals! I challenge this robot! I will easily score better on this gaydar test than this robot.

Nicole: I didn’t know you were good at identifying people’s sexual orientation.

Dan: I assume I am. I don’t know why I wouldn’t be. Plus, I am better than robots at everything else robots do. Did you ever play Hearts on Windows 95?

Nicole: I was born in 1996.

Dan: Well, it was real damn easy. Also, Ms Pacman. I’m good at that too. Bring on the gaydar robot!

I will be Gary Kasparov and it can be Deep Blue! I am John Henry and the robot is the steam drill!

Nicole: Uh, Deep Blue beat Kasparov. Also, John Henry died in that song.

Dan: Irregardless, I shall triumph! Also, I don’t trust scientists. I bet they cheated and just gave the robot a bunch of easy pictures of Freddie Mercury and Elton John.

Nicole: Regardless, yeah, whatever. Okay, here are 8 pictures. Go for it.

Dan: It’s weird that you had 8 pictures ready to go like that, but here we go…

Definitely straight. No gay man would wear that hat.

Well, maybe ironically… Still, I say straight.

The cops in the Police Academy movies “accidentally” went into that gay bar way too many times for it to be a coincidence, but still I think straight is the answer here too.

Now, I’m sure there are gay KGB agents, but wouldn’t they probably be closeted and answer straight when questioned? So, I say straight.

Straight as an arrow.

Same as with the KGB agent.

Straight.

Vikings come from before people understood that sexual orientation was a thing and there were just labels for particular types of sexual acts, so I object to this tricky picture. If I have to guess, I’ll say straight.

This one is also a trick. You know that my favorite song is Queen’s “Fat Bottomed Girls,” so you think I’ll say gay, which means I say straight. Also, it’s a stupid trick because Brian May wrote the song, not Freddie Mercury. Although I guess Brian might be gay too. I’ll need to see a picture of him in a hat to be sure, I guess. Yeah, wait, why do all these guys have hats on?

Aha, even more hat trickery! You underestimate my progressive political beliefs and expect me to think that only a gay man would wear that hat, so again, it must be a straight guy. Damn, I’m glad I read “The Purloined Letter” so many times. It is really helping me catch your sneakiness. Are you a lesbian? I think I read a scientific study about lesbians being 7% sneakier than everyone else.

Dan: How did I do?

Nicole: You got 0 out of 8, so you’re terrible. Also, you didn’t read an article about sneaky lesbians!

You read a quote that was totally made up for this article to make fun of the experiment. And that wasn’t even 10 minutes ago. Anyway, these are all pictures of Zach, just with different hats.

Dan: You damn sneaky scientists! I knew you couldn’t be trusted. How did the robot do?

Nicole: You realize we’re not actually at Stanford, right? I don’t have this AI.... uh, I mean, the “robot” got 8 out of 8, perfect score.

Dan: Bah! I still don’t trust robots. And I thought Zach was a pescatarian. The robot can only say gay or straight (which is very discriminatory if you ask me) so how does this work?

Nicole: Um, what do you think pescatarian means?

Dan: Someone only attracted to mermaids – duh.

Nicole: That’s definitely not what it means. Plus, I don’t even think Zach is pescatarian anyway.

Dan: Irregardless, I have figured out another problem too. Besides being pesca-phobic, stupidly lumping all orientations together into just straight or gay, having no non-evil scientific purpose, and attempting to steal the Sorting Hat’s livelihood, this robot could actually increase its score if it just guessed heterosexual every time, like I did. To explain further, 94% of the population identifies as heterosexual. A truly random selection of faces would result in 94% heterosexual faces. Thus, if the robot was truly intelligent, it would just answer heterosexual every time and score 94%. This robot only scored what? 81% at best, right? This robot is obviously not very smart if it can’t figure that out. So add stupid to the list of robot problems.

Nicole: I don’t think the robot, damn it, I mean AI… I don’t think the AI is just trying win a contest or score an A on a test.

Dan: Doesn’t matter. Contest over, and I declare myself the victor. Dan’s score on a random sample of pictures: 94%. Robot’s score 81%. I am 7% smarter than the robot, just like lesbians are 7% sneakier than everyone else2. Take that, robot!

Nicole: 94-81 is not 7.

Dan: End communication.

2

Again, this is not true. It is made up for the purposes of satire. Also, this is not how math works, even if the subtraction had been correct.

My boss compared my outfit to Lebron James due to the fact that I had wireless white headphones on !

What is with our obsession with image? Why does everyone need to be their own personal “brand?” Isn’t it ok just to be an average person anymore?

I think we overvalue image in our society. There are countless reality TV shows that are completely focused on the image that the real-life characters portray. It is almost as if these characters are nothing without their image. Granted, these people are famous and so it makes perfect sense for them to be the taste-makers and trend-setters; the reality is that we don’t really see their reality at all. We see a heavily-produced and staged production that only shows the image that character is putting out.

For me, I’m not interested in the image anymore. I want to know people are actually like on the inside. People need to stop being so damn shallow. It is kind of ridiculous.

(Oh, and by the way, the headphones that I have cost me about $50. I think Lebron wears Beats, which run hundreds of dollars more than that.)

All three of our intrepid Brain Stew editors heroically ventured deep into the depths of PLHCSA Territory to bring you the hot news from last Tuesday’s trivia night.

Here’s what they reported back: The trivia night was hosted in ProHo’s own “Anthro Lab” for the first time in the history of the event. This led to confused freshman getting permanently lost in the winding hallways of the ProHo basement, satisfying PLHCSA’s annual quota of human sacrifices to the HoCo ghosts. Just ignore those unearthly shrieks at night from the spirits of the ones you’ve wronged, PLHCSA officers.

There was a taco bar, which immediately got devoured within 3.2 seconds of doors being opened, leading anybody who came later to complain, “Where are the tacos? The sign said there’d be tacos...”

Trivia tables came lavishly decorated, in order to avoid the controversy of last year when students were encouraged to decorate their own tables. (Some glitter stains just never come out of the Museum Room floor....)

The professors, having secured their usual front-and-center table, proceeded to barricade the area around it so that students were forced to sit in the back and struggle to see the questions on the PowerPoint slides.

Halfway through the evening, the announcer’s microphone malfunctioned, causing a stir as people struggled to hear the questions being read--wait, what? The microphone was working the entire time? Then why could nobody hear anything? Surely it wasn’t just the PLHCSA officers being too quiet...

Interim Dean Dan Gerth walked away with the prizes for both the “Heads-or-Tails Game” and the “Birthday Game”, using his secret technique of keeping a hand on both his head AND tail during the coin tosses, and claiming that he is an immortal, omnipresent being with no real birthday. The PLHSCA officers tried to dispute this, but Dan locked them all in a Star Wars-esque Force Grip until they complied.

A surprise bonus round appeared in the middle of the questions, leading some students to overhear PLHCSA Secretary Sara Hilpert murmur, “That’s weird...I don’t remember putting this in the PowerPoint...”. The bonus round turned out to be obscure trivia about the Progressive Rock band Yes, which unanimously no one knew the answers to. Some eyewitness reports say they saw Emma Daues standing in the corner, evilly giggling, and whispering, “Yes..yes...the prog will reign supreme....” around the time of the incident.

At the end of the night, the scores were very close, with the professors a fraction of a point ahead, A final round would decide who the victor would be. Suddenly, the electricity in the Anthro Lab cut off for a full minute, causing a mild panic.

When the lights came back on, all of the scores were erased off of the whiteboard, and the coveted Trivia Trophy was missing from its stand. On the board read a message: “Haha! I have stolen your precious trophy and with it, I am the winner of the trivia night! ~Papí” With no trophy to give out, the trivia night ended on an inconclusive note, and both students and teachers went home empty handed.

So who was the real winner of the trivia night? The professors?

The Students? Papí? Maybe the real winner was the friends we made along the way. Or maybe you should just read Dan’s email on Monday for what actually happened.

Amid the chaos of college, Emma Daues is still standing! Another victory for prog!

THE PROG CORNER! --A music column-Hello, all you wonderful Honors College students out there! School got you down? Tests and homeworks starting to rear their ugly heads? Here’s some progressive rock to put some pep in your step!

This week we’re going back to the loves of my life, Emerson Lake & Palmer, with possibly my favorite ELP album of all time!

Trilogy - Emerson Lake & Palmer (1972) With three weird, successful albums under their belt, Emerson Lake & Palmer went to work on the fourth in their lineup, Trilogy.

This is really solid album, but…what’s up with the cover art? Here we have a painting of the members of ELP, depicted as some sort of three-headed entity, or something like conjoined triplets. You could say that this represents how Keith Emerson, Greg Lake, and Carl Palmer use their individual talents to come together as a single, powerful musical force...but why would we want to think in metaphors? Surely living as a three-headed blob would make it very hard to play music!

The album’s first track, “The Endless Enigma (Pt. 1)” begins with a faint heartbeat sound, and an eerie whistle. Suddenly we’re greeted with a frantic mash of all instruments, which builds until the lyrics finally enter on the scene. Greg Lake wails out what only can be described as an “anti-love song”. Seriously, the lyrics are just one big insult, bashing someone while the speaker glorifies himself because he “rules all of the earth, / witnessed my birth, / cried at the sight of a man”. Things take a bit of gentler turn as the album transitions into a piano instrumental, “Fugue”. But after that, we have “The Endless Enigma (Pt. 2)”, which gives us a grand, third verse to our epic before ending with a synthy bang.

Next up is the slow and mellow “From the Beginning”, which heavily features Greg and his swoon-inducing voice & guitar. The song is a melancholy look at a couple going through some tough times, but is reassured that they are “meant to be here...from the beginning”. It ends with a lengthy, subdued keyboard solo, and then it’s on to “The Sheriff”. This track is an upbeat tale of a Wild West chase between a sheriff and an outlaw. For the most part it marches on at a jaunty pace, but at the very end, we’re treated to a lightning-fast ragtime-esque piano solo by Keith. Fun fact about this song: If you listen very carefully during the drums at the beginning, you can hear Carl Palmer hit a wrong drum and then say, “...shit!” before continuing.

“Sheriff” transitions perfectly into another upbeat track, “Hoedown”. Like with previous albums, Keith shows his fondness for the classical with this organ-y rendition of an excerpt from Aaron Copland’s “Rodeo”. Keith’s quick fingers take center stage here as he dashes from frantic melody to frantic melody. Next is the title track, “Trilogy”, which is probably my favorite. It starts out with a sentimental piano melody and Greg’s mournful voice as he sings a song about breaking up. Afterwards there is an extended piano solo, which builds and builds until suddenly the music BURSTS with intense synths!!

It’s such a powerful and emotional transition that catches you completely off-guard. Greg comes in with a third verse and then the song ends on a quirky, blues-y cadence.

The next song, “Living Sin”, is...odd, and I have a hard time deciding if I really like it or not. The song contains a lot of funky, evil-sounding organ, and Greg utilizes his most creepy, growly vocals ever.

The lyrics are unsettling, and possibly filled to the brim with innuendo. Seriously, what do “That savage woman makes you pleased” and “Turn your inside outside-in” sound like to you? Not good. It doesn’t help that the song ends with a heebie-jeebie-inducing “nice and ssssslippery~”. Eugh. The word “slippery” should just stay out of song lyrics in general.

And that brings us to the final song, “Abaddon’s Bolero”. Based on a type of classical music style known as bolero, the song takes on a very marching-band-like feel with it’s steady snare drum beat throughout. The music starts out soft with only one instrument, but as it progresses, more synths are added until it’s a grand fanfare of epic proportions. Supposedly the band rarely ever performed this song on tour, because it required the use of so many synths at the same time. Keith may be a piano wizard, but he only has so many hands. It’s a good jaunty march that seems to really lift the spirits.

After a cute little synth wail that is melodically similar to the synths at the beginning of the album, the song ends on a light chord, and the album is done.

While this album is probably not the craziest that ELP has ever put out (re: Armadillo Tank), the songs are memorable and playful, as well as sometimes very emotional. Who knew something so great could come from a naked, three-headed blob?

I hope you enjoyed this issue’s Prog Corner! I’ll see you next time, but until then...stay, uh...stay slippery!

NEW CONTEST!!!!

The next issue of Brain Stew (Oct. 20) will be our HALLOWEEN ISSUE, so we'd like to see some spooky spirit!

Everybody asks the question, "What are you dressing up as for Halloween?" Well, we here at Brain Stew HQ want to flip this question on its head and ask, "What do you think EVERYONE ELSE should dress up as for Halloween?" What kind of costume would you dictate to every person on earth? Or should all people wear the exact same thing? It's all up to you! Go wild!

Write us an essay (100 words minimum) answering this question. The Brain Stew editors will then choose a winner based on creativity and all-around coolness.

Sorry, we can't make your costume fantasies come true, but the winner of the contest will get their work published in the Halloween issue of Brain Stew, and they will also receive an adorable BLACK CAT FRIEND, lovingly crocheted by Emma Daues! This cuddly kitty is the perfect Halloween companion, and is excited to find a forever home!

Entries are due Wednesday, October 18th. Happy Haunting!

Nicole Gevers:

For a brief period in 7th grade, I was my school’s mascot. Initially, I thought it would be a fun opportunity to hang out with my much cooler cheerleader friends (it’s incredible I even had friends in middle school) and do fun mascot-y things like give high fives to little kids and start the wave. Long story short, being “Scotty” was one of the worst experiences of my life. The suit was several sizes too big for me and it was so heavy that I could barely move. I also scared the shit out of a lot of little kids. I was terrible at the job and hated every minute of it.

Emma Daues:

When I was in Vocal Point last year, I was able to score a really big solo for our spring concert that we have with the percussion ensemble. We keep our music in black binders when we perform, and before the concert I moved all my music to a shiny new binder that wasn't all beat-up. When we walked on stage at the start of the concert, I realized that I had accidentally grabbed my beat-up binder, and all my music was backstage. It was fortunate that I had pretty much all the music memorized... except my solo. I had to sheepishly ask an alto friend to switch binders during the concert so that I could have music. My solo ended up really nice, but I was really jittery and felt like a total idiot for the entire concert.

Zach Lee:

So when I was a freshman (and still to this day), I was (and still am) very, very, VERY afraid of breaking rules, especially rules that I don’t know about. This has turned into some form of paranoia now, but anyway, freshman year I had this shortcut to Marrilac Hall from Provincial House, and the door said that it was alarmed, but EVERYONE knew that it wasn’t alarmed. Well one day, it was alarmed, and I BOLTED. In fact, my roomie saw me walking outside his window and snapped me in the action. To the right you’ll see me speed walking in my rainbow jumper, pretending like I didn’t disrupt Villa and potentially falsely call emergency vehicles to campus. (None of that happened, but I was very afraid.) I went to the hall director’s office to report myself, but she was gone for the day, so I just skipped class and got some ice cream instead.

inqueeries

a column for exploring the intersections of sex, gender, and sexuality

by zachary j. lee

“asexual” Hey folks, and welcome to another exciting inqueeries column! I don’t know about y’all, but as a queer person, I’m always looking out for representations of gender and sexual minorities in the media. Recently, I’ve been bingeing shows like Transparent on Amazon Prime and The Fosters on Netflix, both of which have casts featuring transgender characters and actors, gay and lesbian characters, and normal family issues. Of course, these shows arguably exist for the purpose of placing people with typically marginalized identities into the protagonist’s—and kind of every other role’s—spot(s). SO! Imagine my great joy when I watch a show that I love and WHAMO suddenly there’s someone gay or pansexual or asexual or agender in the middle of just normal life?

This happened earlier this month when I binged the newest season of Bojack Horseman. **Oh hey, warning, there’s some spoiler alerts, but they’re not that major.** The writers of BH have a reputation for bluntly addressing relevant issues, some of my favorties being the storyline with Diane’s and Sextina’s abortions in season three and the treatment of Buzzfeed as a news source. At the end of season three, however, we were left with a cliff hanger as Todd sat in a diner with a friend from childhood, Emily, who was introduced as a potential romantic interest for Todd. She asks him after several attempts to ask him if he wants to be her girlfriend, “What’s your deal? I feel like you like me, but you like me, and I don’t know what that is. Are you gay?” (You can imagine me pausing at this point both to revel in and detest that a character brought up but also assumed someone’s sexuality.) Instead, watch as Todd subverts our expectations: “I’m not gay! I mean, I don’t think I am. But... I don’t think I’m straight either. I don’t know what I am. I think I might be nothing.” Emily goes on to assure Todd that that’s okay, which is great! But let’s talk about what asexuality is first: On a very basic level, people who are asexual do not typically feel sexual attraction to others, independent of the other person’s gender or sex; people who do feel this attraction are considered allosexual.

Just as how gender and sexuality are spectrums (men/women, male/female, homo-/heterosexual, etc.), sexual attraction is also on a spectrum. For example, someone who is demisexual experiences romantic attraction before sexual attraction, like being attracted mostly or exclusively to people that they’ve been friends with for years.

So why is it so important that a character in a pretty popular show that isn’t about gender and sexuality issues come out as asexual? Well I can think of a couple things. First off, like Emily, many people might equate a lack of attraction for one sex as a sure attraction to the other sex—because Todd shows Emily that he enjoys spending time with her but doens’t accept any of Emily’s sexual advances, she assumes that Todd is gay. This technically isn’t a bad guess; someone who’s in the closet may also present these same closeness without the sex.

Additionally, I don’t think that her question is uncalled for—my motto is that unless you’re trying to get in my pants, then it doesn’t really matter what my sexuality is, right? And, well, Emily’s trying to see if Todd wants to be closer, so I think it’s okay for her to get right to the point.

Secondly, we have an entire episode dedicated to Todd in this fourth season where he’s trying to get all of these tasks done before he goes to an asexual support group in the evening. (The tension in the episode is about whether he’ll finish everything for his friends in time to go to the meeting.) Anyway, up until the fourth season, Todd hasn’t been defined as an asexual character, and this is something that continues into this season. The Todd episode begins with Todd rushing to the orchestra to play his part on time (he’s a professional triangle player now!) and the other orchestra members list all the cool things Todd has done after the show: he survived a prison gang, he started a successful Uber-like company, he spent time swapped with a prince doppelganger, the list goes on and on. Sure, part of Bojack Horseman’s charm is the absurd plotlines, but Todd started off as a bum on Bojack’s couch in the first season and tumbled his way up to someone that his friends count on to get things done. Don’t get me wrong, I’m glad for shows like Transparent and The Fosters who tackle LGBTQ+ issues head-on, but it’s especially refreshing to see well-written side characters like Todd who break the heteronormative mold, and in doing so, show the audience that it’s perfectly natural to experience—or not experience—parts of life that others have normalized.

In the next issue, I want to interview some people about bisexuality, pansexuality, and omnisexuality! If you identify as someone with any of those identities and want to be interviewed for my column, or if you have questions about any of those identities that you’d like to see answered in the interviews, send me an email at zjlmr5@mail.umsl.edu!

Dear Stewmasters, I am a student in the PLRC (Pretty Lame Regular College), and after looking through the PLHC Snapchat and realizing how boring my life is, I am quite depressed. Since it's too late to actually apply to the Honors College, I'm looking to recreate the experience as best I can. I already have a clipping of Dan Gerth's beard taped above my bed, but I'm curious about how I can do better. Is showing up to every Honors College event cool? What about every honors class?

Thanks in advance for your brainy advice.

Dear progressive liberal hippies in charge of the liberal media (AKA Brain Stew), I’m not sure why you have an entire section to “progressive” rock?

Ugh! The liberal addenda at it again, dragging politics into everything! Can you have at least have a conservative rock section to balance the political spectrum here?

Keith Dear Keith, You mean country music? Nah, fek u.

Love and kissies, The BS Editors

Giuseppe Vitellaro, Dishonorable Student Our dearest Giuseppe, Thank you for your correspondance! We hope that the Currentmasters are not treating you like a slave monkey. Quite frankly, we are surprised that a member of the PLRC such as yourself has gained access to our shitty little magazine. How did this happen? Please give away the secret agent and we will give away the secrets to happiness—normally you have to take Cultural Traditions and pass with at least a B- in order to receive this knowledge.

For now though, the beard is a great start. Please continue to have FOMO about our events until yo feel so inclined that you come to our events. Like Haunted Honors on Octover 31!

Love and kissies, The Stewmasters Candy Mandy~ Oh dear Mandy, Thank you for the sweet candy!

You graciously adorned the cork board near your door, With delicious sugary treats galore.

Oh what a smile it brings to a student’s face, You truly make the 2nd floor a better place.

Mandy I hope you like my poem in homage to you generously providing the sweet delicacies that are integral to my existence. If you would put out EVEN more candy I’d be grateful.

Without more candy my grades could suffer, I mean possibly my entire life could be ruined. So you’d basically be saving my life and I can tell you for a fact that I’d definitely appreciate that.

During school year 2016 -2017, academic advisor Mandy Bibee asked you, the students, hard hitting questions each week and you responded in a segment called Question of the Week. If you missed it, the questions were posted outside of Bibee’s office, C 202, pretty much all year. Questions ranged from the standard getting to know you, to mindless pop candy, to poignant life-altering questions. And, your answers did not disappoint, check out the responses below. Annnd, if you’re sad that you didn’t get a chance to participate, don’t fret, you still have a chance with this semester’s on-going story. Take a walk up to C 202 to contribute to the story.

What is your favorite back to school tradition?

First day of school photos Hang up my pictures Graduating Buying fresh, new school supplies Dorm decorating Trunk parties School supplies Move-in Hanging out with the world’s best RA, Trent

Questions of the Week:

Why are you excited to be part of the PLHC? The professors It feels like a fairytale I’m studying to become a princess Brainstew Not Dan Gerth Where is the most beautiful place you’ve ever been?

Asleep in my bed The roof of 360 here in StL Haiti The top of the Sears/Willis Tower in Chicago Top of Chimney Tops in (the) Smokey Mountains Barcelona, Spain Scotland Downtown of Kansas City New York City, Brooklyn Bridge Specifically What is a topic (serious or not) that you with the Honors College would make into a class?

How to come up with your own course list instead of having students do it St. Louis History Meme-ology What is your favorite memory from childhood?

Birth Family vacation at the beach It’s not specific but I really love four-wheelin’ an’ muddin’ What was your most embarrassing in-class moment?

Called the prof mom :/ One of my teachers in high school made me and my boyfriend of one week sit in the front of the classroom and hold hands while the rest of the class and the school choir sang love songs to us on Valentines Day. What would you do if you were invisible for a day?

I would run around and dramatically open and close doors to scare people.

I would put a cat on my head and run around.

Throw confetti around Get so much work done without being bothered by anyone!! <3 -Type A

What is a mantra you use to motivate yourself when you need a boost?

Rise and Shine It’ll all be worth it!

Do it for momma!

It could be worse Do it for the vine/insta I don’t have a mantra, but I like to consider the pros and cons of what I need to do You’re going to fail anyway, go ahead and bing watch you, you deserve it What’s your favorite winter activity?

Deer season Hiking Seeing friends and family Not being cold Drinking winter flavored fluids! <3 (Hot chocolate and peppermint mocha) Olympic Sports: Winter; Curling or Luge. Summer; Trampoline or Table Tennis.

Curling – boring, but actually kind of impressive Luge – dangerous Curling – it’s cool. While I love luge, if the brack isn’t right, it can be dangerous/deadly to lugers.

Ping Pong Table Tennis, but I appreciate both Table Tennis – always fun, always exciting The Valentine’s Day Debate; Is it….

A beloved holiday that brightens even the coldest of winters?

A marketing ploy that makes some people feel unloved and lonely?

Everyone likes getting chocolate This is the only day I can share my worst puns Hallmark holiday What are you doing for/How was your spring break?

Gdn’ to Florida! (specifically, Naples ) [Lucky, Cool ] Chicago Grand Canyon and MIM (Music Instrument Museum!)

A staycation in Villa North while my friends go to FLORIDA Share some of your tips for getting through FINALS WEEK: Change scenery. A LOT. Note cards!

Procrastinating by writing for BrainStew!

And, reading BrainStew Getting sleep Pray!

Sleep and Exercise!

Crying at appropriate (and inappropriate times)