Currents Magazine Spring 2021: Beauty From Ashes

Beauty from Ashes

Vol. CXVI

CURRENTS

Letter from the Editor Beauty from ashes, mourning turned to joy, the burden of heaviness transformed into a garment of praise.

These are the promises God makes to His people in Isaiah 61, and they are woven throughout Scripture.

While Isaiah speaks these words prophetically in the Old Testament, Jesus fulfills them many centuries later when he quotes the prophet in a Jewish synagogue, saying in Luke 4:18, “The Spirit of the Lord is upon me. Because He has anointed me to preach the good news to the poor; He has sent me to heal the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives, and recovery of sight to the blind, to set free those who are oppressed, to proclaim the favorable year of the Lord.”

These are not small promises. The God of the Bible is clearly a miracle-working God. From the Old Testament to the New, God turns water into wine, raises dry bones back to life, heals the sick, forgives the unforgivable.

So what do we make of all this today? In a world filled with such depravity, such despair, is it possible that God’s promise in Scripture to make beauty from ashes is still true?

And what are we to believe when tragedy strikes us personally, when something, or someone we love is ripped from our grasp? As the ability to breathe becomes almost impossible, the ashes of circumstance seem to make God’s promise only empty words.

How do we cling to the promise of hope and believe in what God whispers to our hearts above what our eyes see?

These are the questions I have asked myself throughout the past year. Every day felt monotonous — I read stories of grief and witnessed people around me carry heavy burdens of restlessness and uncertainty about the future. I mourned cancelled plans and constantly missed loved ones who were far from me. I sat uncomfortably in my own brokenness.

“Come to Me,” Jesus beckons in Matthew 11:28, “All you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.”

Yes, rest. That is what the whole world longs for.

A peace that surpasses all understanding. A knowledge that the trials of this life will be rectified in eternity. A sureness in the promise that beauty will be made from the ashes of our brokenness.

When I first considered what I wanted this magazine to be about — what stories I believed our community needed to hear, I remembered the Scripture I kept coming back to in months past. The same one from Isaiah 61:3, which spoke a radical word of hope in a devastating situation.

“To give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the Lord, that He might be glorified.”

The promise God makes to us is not that there won’t be ashes, but that He will salvage the wreckage and transform it into something beautiful in His time and for His glory. He will give us joy in our mourning and the ability to praise in seasons of heaviness. He will do these things because He promised.

I invite you to journey through the pages of this magazine — stories of faith, struggle, triumph, defeat, devastation, loss, questioning, love, meaning, joy, healing and forgiveness.

See for yourself how those in the Pepperdine and Malibu communities have experienced the fulfillment of God’s promise to make beauty from ashes.

Editor-in-Chief

Staff

Melissa Locke Lead Designer

Joanna Cabalquinto Design Assistant

Isabella Teague Design Assistant

Anastasia Condolon Photo Editor

Marley Penagos Production Assistant I

Lydia duPerier Production Assistant I

Jolie Lowe Production Assistant II

Annabelle Childers Production Assistant II

Ivy Moore Assistant Editor

Marisa Dragos Assistant Editor

Contributors Ally Armstrong, Kiley Distelrath, D’Artagnon Fulton, Taylor Gather, Sarah Johnson, Claire Lee, Ali Levens, Ashley Mowreader, Samantha Miller, Emily Morton, Sam Nolan, Emily Shaw, Rowan Toke, Samantha Torre, Jessica Wang, Abby Wilt, Addison Whiten, Mia Zendejas Pepperdine Graphic Media Executive Editor Makena Huey

Adviser Christina Littlefield, Journalism and Religion Professor

Tåblë øf Çøñtëñts Clinging to Hope: How Students Overcome Disappointment

A Journey from Ruin to Resilience: The Malibu Community Reflects on Woolsey

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More Than a Wish Your Heart Makes: Dreams & Their Significance

Nature Leads the Way

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“Chalk” by D’Artagnon Fulton “Only in a Memory” by Sam Nolan

From Subway to the ER: Brandon Gille Goes on a Painfully Unique First Date

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What is Beauty? Defining the Undefinable

Hailey Serrano Uses TikTok to Spread Love and Share her Faith

10 Callie Mechelke Uses Music To Convey Emotion & Connect With Others

13 “God is a Healer”: Kim Yeung Finds Deeper Identity in Christ after Tennis Injury

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Healing Comes in Waves: The Grieving Process & Honoring the Lives of Loved Ones

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Alexa Rydell Accepts Jesus in a Hammock

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Nicholas Olson Finds Peace in his Romantic Relationship

31 Finding Spiritual Rest in an Anxious World

32 Sydney Griffith & Brandon Rudolph: A Love Between Best Friends

35 The Fallacy of Falling in Love

36 Avenue of Acceptance: How Mental Health & Faith Intertwine

39 Bridging the Gap Between Climate Migration & Christianity

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“Marry the Man Behind the Vacuum Cleaner”: A Generational Love Story

47 Life After Death, Whatever That Means

48 “The Eternal Race Within” by Mia Zendejas “Fields of Frost” by Anastasia Condolon

51 When Forgiveness Shocks the World

52 Madison Menefee Owns Her Faith

55 Withstanding the Test of Time: Alaina Trofler Wants a Love that Lasts

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Sierra Perry

Çlïñgïñg tø Høpë HOW STUDENTS OVERCOME DISAPPOINTMENT Story by Abby Wilt Photos by Lindsey Sullivan and Anastasia Condolon Photo illustration by Isabella Teague The past year has been full of disappointments, but students said the hardships they faced taught them valuable life lessons.

Even though setbacks are inevitable, it is possible to find the good amid the pain.

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Sophia Kouretas Whether it’s losing a loved one, struggling through an injury, missing a year of in-person school or not getting a dream job, everyone has experienced disappointment in their lives.

While disappointments can be hard, there can be hope and light found in the midst of them. Sierra Perry, a master’s student in Religion, learned this lesson as she experienced a difficult situation that helped her embrace her faith and grow as a person this past year.

“I think any struggle that we go through is a way that God wants to show us actually how much he really loves us,” Perry said. “Knowing that you can cling to hope, and that there should be a point where you shift from trying to understand what you did wrong and to just receive the love that God wants to give you.”

Perry said it’s hard to grow when everything is working out, but when faced with challenges, people are able to learn lessons they might not have otherwise learned. Sometimes it takes a major disappointment to find hope and joy in unexpected places.

Hope from a biblical perspective Hope is defined as a “desire accompanied by expectation of or belief in fulfillment,” according to the Merriam-Webster Dictionary. From a biblical perspective, hope means clinging to God amid hard circumstances and believing that God works all circumstances together for good, as Paul the Apostle writes in Romans 8:28. The Bible defines hope as

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looking to eternity to find satisfaction, rather than looking to people, places or things for peace and comfort.

Several Pepperdine students said they can relate to what British theologian C.S. Lewis writes in his book “The Problem of Pain”: “God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks in our conscience, but shouts in our pain; it’s His megaphone to rouse a deaf world.”

While the last year has been especially challenging, students said they have grown from the difficulties they faced.

“I wasn’t there until I had a really, really hard situation,” Perry said. “That’s when I finally was able to understand how deep and wide that love is to the extent that I can. I don’t think we’ll ever really be able to fully fathom how incredible God’s love is because we’re human.”

Perry said she went through a life-changing injury last March when she broke her femur. She was on a hike and jumped out of the way of a rattlesnake, onto her leg that already had a stress fracture. She struggled down the mountain and went into surgery immediately.

It is now over a year later, and she still carries a scar on her thigh from her injury. The week leading up to her injury, Perry said she ran half-marathons seven days in a row, which is why she had a stress fracture. Now, she is no longer able to run.

During her injury, she suddenly lost her aunt to brain cancer, all while dealing with the challenges of COVID-19.

“It was actually the worst year of my life if I’m being entirely honest,” Perry said. “But it has probably been one of the deepest years in terms of growing points in my faith.”

Throughout her disappointments, Perry held fast to her faith and believed in a greater purpose for the pain she was going through. She said God has taught her that she has to cling to her faith in hardships and that her injury helped her grasp God’s love for her even more than before.

“God loves me so much that he wanted to take [running] away from me,” Perry said. “In order for him to get my attention, he had to do something as dramatic as breaking my leg.”

First-year student Sophia Kouretas can relate.

In 2020, she lost her senior year of high school and the beginning of her college experience due to COVID-19. She said she has also grown from her challenges — becoming a better person because of limited distractions and more free time.

“You really realize how strong the grounding of your faith is when every external factor is taken away and you’re just left with your own self,” Kouretas said.

At the beginning of the pandemic, Kouretas said she tried to manage her disappointments by herself and wasn’t letting God into her life to guide her through them. She said she wasn’t connected to her faith and put God on the back burner for a time.

While Kouretas said she isn’t usually quick to blame God for disappointments in her life, she started to blame Him since hardships kept occurring one after the other. She said she quickly realized that she couldn’t navigate her challenges by herself and instead needed to cling to her faith.

“I wasn’t made to do it by myself; I was made to do it with God by me and next to me and included in all my worries,” Kouretas said. “I literally tried to do all this by myself, and I can’t do it by myself.”

A common hope In the past year, almost 50% of Americans said they felt down, depressed or hopeless during the pandemic, according to USA Facts. But with that reality comes a shared experience.

Thema Bryant-Davis is a Pepperdine psychology professor at the Graduate School of Education and Psychology, a licensed psychologist and director of the Culture and Trauma Research Lab at Pepperdine. She said one of the gifts of the past year is that everyone can relate to each other’s struggles.

“They may not know the details, but they have an awareness of what you’re going through,” Bryant-Davis said. “When we have an individual trauma, unless you tell people, they don’t know.”

Experiencing shared grief and pain, Bryant-Davis said, can cause people to feel less alone and help them bond with others through their challenges.

Bryant-Davis, also an ordained elder at the African Methodist Episcopal Church, said she relies on her faith to give her hope during hard times, and that even throughout the pandemic and the loss of the physical gathering of churches, she has seen people become more aware of their spiritual lives.

“Faith has been so important,” Bryant-Davis said.

“Many times people are dependent on the building and being able to gather in person, but the gift of that personal relationship – our prayer life, our devotional life – [by] really tapping into that and making use of it, there has been a lot of growth and more awareness.

While life can often be disappointing, Bryant-Davis said it is crucial to recognize that people aren’t alone in their struggles and that no matter what, their faith will always be there. She also said that when dealing with disappointments, it’s important to talk to others and reach out to people who are going through similar hardships. She also encouraged people dealing with setbacks to plan activities to look forward to in the near future and to have long-term goals to plan for.

Kouretas said that if she could give anyone advice about coping with disappointments, she would say to rely on God and find hope in each setback.

“Use that time and use your pain to try your best to transform that into something good,” Kouretas said. “Grow from it, and learn from it and push yourself more than you ever have.”

Staying strong amid disappointments Even throughout hardships, Pepperdine professors said they are proud of how students have coped with the disappointments they have faced. Ryan Board, professor of Music and director of Choral Activities at Pepperdine, said his choir students have come up with new ways to share their music throughout the pandemic, completing some amazing projects while virtual. For example, the choir department recorded and produced a whole Christmas album.

“In our world, nearly everything has felt like a disappointment,” Board said. “I’ve been incredibly impressed with the resiliency and the attitude of our students.”

Sierra Perry

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More Than a Wish Your Heart Makes DREAMS & THEIR SIGNIFICANCE Story by Marley Penagos Photos by Lindsey Sullivan Photo illustration by Isabella Teague

Every human being dreams while asleep — but what do dreams mean? Depending on who is asked, dreams have many different meanings across cultures, professions and religions.

Modeled by Cameron Davis

Soaring through the air, having teeth randomly fall out, and showing up for a huge speech without pants.

These are some of the most commonly occurring dreams among Americans, according to an Amerisleep survey of over 2,000 American adults.

Confusing and sometimes troubling scenarios that run wild in people’s heads during sleep actually have more meaning than some may realize, and humans have been assigning meaning to their dreams since biblical times.

Throughout the Bible, God speaks to humans through dreams and prophetic visions. Some South American cultures believe that a shaman’s dreams can bless a woman with a fruitful womb. In Portugal, dreaming of someone’s death may give them a longer life.

Dreams hold more than spiritual meaning — studies have shown dreams to have significant neurological and psychological meaning too.

“Basically, what we dream about are emotional issues that have sort of bothered us during the day,” Psychology Professor Diana Bursy said. “Some people say, ‘I never dreamed’ or ‘I don’t remember my dreams,’ but everybody dreams, because dreaming is a very helpful part of the sleeping process.”

Everybody dreams Everybody experiences neurological activity during REM (rapid eye movement) sleep, according to Journal of Sleep Research studies conducted on self-proclaimed “non-dreamers.”

Humans — even “non-dreamers” — actually have between three and seven dreams every night.

Dreaming is a uniquely human phenomenon, and it has played several functions throughout the history of humankind.

“Dreams have two functions as far as we know right now,” Bursy said.

The first function of dreams is as an outlet to work through the emotional issues people experienced the day prior. When people dream, the prefrontal cortex turns off and stops producing the stress-related hormone noradrenaline, allowing them to process their emotions in an environment without stress or fear.

Dreams can also function as a creative brain-storming session, with many famous artists having attributed their success to dreams. “[In dreams,] all kinds of areas of the brain are open for interaction with one another, and that can foster creativity,” Bursy said.

That’s true for all forms of creative thinking.

Dmitri Mendeleev, creator of the Periodic Table of Elements, first envisioned the table in his sleep, Paul Strathern wrote in a biographical novel.

“I saw in a dream, a table, where all the elements fell into place as required,” Mendeleev wrote. “Awakening, I immediately wrote it down on a piece of paper.”

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Mary Shelley wrote in the introduction of her iconic novel, “Frankenstein,” that the idea appeared to her in the form of a nightmare.

Music artist Paul McCartney said the classic Beatles song “Yesterday” appeared to him in his dreams too, Biography.com reported.

What Pepperdine students dream about “I feel like half the time I remember my dreams,” senior Adam Lucas said. “The ones I remember are usually pretty lucid and just very meaningful.”

The human brain is on the alert for things to remember even while sleeping, according to a study by Italian psychologist Luigi De Gennaro that New Scientist reported. The dream people remember are the most emotionally charged, and the brain deems them important, whether they are awake or not.

Lucas described his “craziest” dream as an experience that can still bring a smile to his face years after it occurred, where he was able to see his father one last time after his death.

“There’s one dream I had after my father passed away,” Lucas said. “You know, as crazy as it sounds, it was like you see them in the dream and you feel them, and you know it sounds crazy because most people think, ‘Oh, you’re just coping’ like ‘It’s probably just a figment of your imagination.’ It could be, but to this day, that one dream has felt more real than everyday life.”

Senior Chloé Boudames has recurring dreams about reuniting with friends on campus.

“Recently during like COVID, a lot of my dreams have been about like being back with friends or like being back on campus or like being back in Malibu,” Boudames said.

Sophomore Psychology major Serah Hodson said she usually remembers her dreams when they are particularly emotional or impactful.

“I really think I dream probably multiple times a night,” Hodson said. “Because I remember my dreams often, and usually, when I remember them [I remember] multiple dreams.”

Hodson said her craziest dream was recurring, and it happened almost every night as she fell asleep.

“This last year we had an earthquake one night while I was kind of half asleep,” Hodson said. “And then for like months afterward, every night, as I would start to fall asleep, I’d have a feeling that the room was shaking and I couldn’t move.”

Bursy said the feeling of being unable to move is a common phenomenon often referred to as ‘sleep paralysis.’

“In REM sleep the muscles are paralyzed — that’s normal for everyone,” Bursy said. “[Sleep paralysis] happens when some people wake up out

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ït wås lïkë , ds ûñ sø ït ås ÿ åz çr s ”Å fëël thëm, øû ÿ d åñ m ëå dr ë th ïñ ëm th ÿøû sëë ÿ bëçåûsë åñd ÿøû kñøw ït søûñds çråz e just coping‘ ‘r ou y , h ‘O k, in th le op pe most t of your en gm fi a st ju ly ab ob pr t‘s like ‘I day, that is th to t bu , be d ul co t I ‘ n. io imaginat ërÿdåÿ ëv åñ th ål rë ë ør m lt fë ås h øñë drëåm life.”

- Ådåm Lûçås, sëñïør

of REM sleep, and they feel that their muscles are paralyzed for one or two seconds after they wake up.”

The link between psychology and spirituality Prophetic dreams have deep roots in history, most notably in the Bible, as God uses dreams to speak to humans.

As Pepperdine students explored the potential meanings of their dreams, many said they look toward spirituality for answers.

“I think [dreams have meaning] from a psychological perspective, but also from a spiritual perspective,” Hodson said. “I know people who’ve had dreams that they believe and I believe to be prophetic, and I’ve had dreams that I believed to be prophetic about me and about people that I know.”

Hodson said those dreams have a different feeling from the other dreams she has every night.

“While I don’t understand all of how it works, I think it makes perfect sense that [God] would communicate with us through dreams,” Hodson said.

Religion Professor Nicholas Zola cited two stories from the Bible he believes are classic examples of God communicating through dreams — the story of Joseph from the Old Testament (Genesis 37) and Peter’s trance in the New Testament (Acts 10:9-16).

“Is it possible for people to have visions?” Zola said. “I would say yes, because God is God, and God can do what God wants to do, and it’s not my jurisdiction to say, ‘God can’t do these things anymore.’”

Psychologist Sigmund Freud was one of the first to define dreams and create theories about them.

Freud saw them as encoded messages from the unconscious, forgotten memories and hidden desires.

Today’s scholars and dream researchers know that dreams are the brain’s way of processing emotions, creating visions in which people act on stressors without the presence of stress chemicals.

“Whether God is sending those visions, or whether God designed our brains in such a way as that’s how we process, and so those visions become a part of what God has kind of already implemented within us,” Zola said.

Boudames also experienced a prophetic dream, when she was a child, in which there was a baby crying and her mother was outside with the baby.

“That was a dream I had, and then several months later, my mom was like, ‘Oh my gosh, I’m pregnant,’” Boudames said.

Future-telling dreams are nothing new. According to Psychology Today, Abraham Lincoln had a prophetic dream of his own assassination — three days before it occurred.

“We live in a Westernized society that tends to be skeptical of these kinds of things,” Zola said. “If we lived in a different part of the world — if we lived

in the Global South, like South America or in Africa — then we might be in a society where people are much more apt to accept visions and dreams as being legitimate.”

Although Zola said he does not believe it is his place to decide whether or not prophetic dreams and visions are legitimate, he said Scripture warns humans not to blaspheme the Holy Spirit.

“I interpret this as saying, ‘Don’t call the work of God something wrong, don’t say that it’s not the work of God,’” Zola said.

While the scientific world and the spiritual world may not agree on the origins of dreams, both show that dreams mean a lot more to humankind than one may think. Whether they are opportunities for emotional processing or messages from God — dreams are certainly more than “a wish your heart makes.”

Modeled by Cameron Davis

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Chalk We watched Eyes of wanderlust and longing As he scratched blue fairytales onto the pavement.

He is dead now So today’s turn along those halls Unveiled layers of whitewash, Ashes, soot.

The transience of the past Has never failed to leave us short of breath Its push and pull Hash and re-hash as meaning rots away, And the magic That settled low on the concrete then Cleared fast and made things all too real.

We have watched oceans dry And forgotten them.

When trees died, We stacked wet stones where they stood And we climbed and climbed and climbed Climbed until our hearts and this garden were worlds apart — Alas, the sky was never close enough.

Fûltøñ ñ ø ñ g tå r ’Å D

Only in a Memory How do you rebuild a relationship To someone who has forgotten its entirety Where mental illness has shoved and forced And replaced your memory with its pain Should I start with my name That crumbles like broken clay When it crosses my mind Because it was yours, too Do I begin with November When it felt like bone cracking in my chest As I sobbed alone in the choir room After your first attempt My silent promise Backed with 16-year-old determination Vowed to show that you are loved That life is worth living How do I attempt to conjure up Our hour-long walks at the island With you pulling my hand to Climb the gnarled driftwood Could I even muster up the words To tell you that the guitar in my corner Reminds me of how your hands tentatively Moved across the same glossy exterior Should I show you the videos of us Sick with dizziness at midnight As we spun endlessly On a long forgotten merry-go-round I have scoured the depths of language But watch the words petrify in amber As I perpetually fall short of Reviving who we once were

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Såm Ñølåñ

DEFINING THE UNDEFINABLE Story by Lydia duPerier Photos by Anastasia Condolon, Photo illustration by Isabella Teague Adian Imbrogno-Mastin

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Beauty is a quality that has no boundaries, no objective definition. Everyone has a different perception of what beauty is — perhaps that in itself is beautiful.

“Beauty is something that makes the world seem more full to you,” said Amanda Cooper, a senior Creative Writing major. “Whether you are looking at a painting, or you’re with someone, or you’re seeing something — whatever it is in that moment, your perception of life and the world becomes fuller because of it, and it changes some aspect of our larger worldview.”

People find beauty in many different things: towering trees against a snow-capped mountain, a canvas covered with the intricate paint strokes of an artist, the harmonious sounds of voices and instruments together. Although these are all vastly different, they are bound by the same theme.

Beauty in nature Most everyone can agree that the things of nature are beautiful. Earth is covered with diverse ecosystems that 8.7 million species call home, according to the National Geographic Society. Scientists have only identified 1.2 million of these species as of 2019.

Each organism is unique, possessing different qualities that make them look and behave differently.

Chris Doran, professor of Religion and founder of the Sustainability minor, is a scuba diver who spends much of his time underwater. While roaming the ocean, he said he finds beauty in the fact that a lot of people never get to see the creatures that he does.

“The different colors that you see underwater, the different ways of living – you know, creatures live differently underwater,” Doran said. “I think that there’s something beautiful to that.”

Doran values growth in nature.

All living things are constantly growing and adapting. Even after a harsh winter or a fire, there is always new growth.

“I’ve lived through a bunch of fires here in the Malibu area,” Doran said. “And seeing green things pop up out of the ash has always been an interesting sign of beauty for me because it’s just a reminder that life can come out of death.”

Beauty in art Scientists and mathematicians often link together symmetry and beauty, Ian McManus, University College London professor, wrote in a European Review journal article. However, the majority of artists find asymmetry to be more aesthetic.

“A genuineness, or an honesty or maybe even a freshness about a painting,” Art Professor Gretchen Batcheller said. “You can look at a work of art, and it doesn’t feel super refined, and it doesn’t feel super perfected.”

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Imperfections and struggles lead to beauty.

Where there is struggle, there is room for growth, and growth, Batcheller said, is beautiful. She always tells her students that if they’re struggling, then that means they are learning.

As an art professor, Batcheller believes that beauty in artwork is found not only in the colors and design of a piece but also in the meaning behind it.

“Beauty for one person might be a painting of a vase of flowers,” Batcheller said. “And the other one might be a slab of meat that’s hanging there, but they see and interpret it.”

Beauty in music Senior Lily Piekos is a singer-songwriter and uses the power of music to influence others.

“Music is the one language that all across the world no matter what your language, no matter what your culture — you can find beauty in the melodies of music or the way a violin sounds or a voice sounds,” Piekos said.

Piekos finds beauty in the way musicians can create a song in any genre, and no matter what, it will provoke some sort of emotion in someone.

Music, for Piekos, is a metaphor for diversity among humans. The melody and different harmonies within a song compliment each other to create something beautiful.

“I think that when music plays and we feel something — you’re tasting a little bit of what being in the presence of Jesus feels like,” Piekos said.

Beauty in philosophy and religion “Beauty is a cognitive phenomenon, a subjective experience,” sophomore Philosophy major Adian Imbrogno-Mastin said. “I think that beauty is freedom from categorical associations.”

Philosophers like Plato and Socrates have studied why one person’s view of beauty is different from others for thousands of years, and still, there is no consensus.

“The chief forms of beauty are order and symmetry and definiteness,” Aristotle wrote in his book “Metaphysics.”

Most of the ancient philosophers concluded that people find beauty in perfection, but that doesn’t explain why some find imperfection beautiful too.

A person’s definition of beauty is completely dependent on their opinion and understanding of beauty. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, but it all stems from one thing, Great Books Professor Paul Contino said.

“All beauty has its source in God,” Contino said.

Whether it be Earth itself, a piece of art or a song, the Bible affirms that God has His hand in creation one way or another, Contino said. The author of Ecclesiastes 3:11 writes, “He has made everything beautiful in its time.”

Beauty in people Many Pepperdine students said people and the memories people make with one another are beautiful.

Whether it be the natural beauty of the human face or beauty within, the word ‘beautiful’ has always been a descriptive word for people.

Imbrogno-Mastin admires his girlfriend, Marley Penagos, a sophomore Currents production assistant.

“What first comes to mind when I think of beauty is my wonderful girlfriend — she’s absolutely beautiful,” Imbrogno-Mastin said.

Cooper finds beauty in the time that people spend with one another.

“I think that there is a lot of beauty in human connection and those smaller moments,” Cooper said.

Cooper recalled that a lot of her most beautiful

memories are the last moments that she was together with all of her friends before the pandemic.

“A moment of beauty is when you don’t know it’s about to be the end of something before it is,” Cooper said. “But it feels like the last good moment that you’re sharing with a group of people.”

Beauty defined The definition of beauty is subjective. Some people are attracted to the vibrancy of a sunset, while others find beauty in the classical notes of a piano.

Some believe that beauty flows from symmetry, while others admire imperfections.

No matter how someone may choose to define beauty, everyone’s perception is rooted in the same truth.

“All beauty is rooted in goodness, and goodness is the truth,” Piekos said.

Amanda Cooper 12

Callie Mechelke Uses Music to Convey Emotion & Connect With Others Story by Samantha Torre

Photo courtesy of Callie Mechelke Junior Callie Mechelke began singing as soon as she began talking.

Mechelke, an Intercultural Communication major, said she has always enjoyed writing and reading poetry. Mechelke’s first grade teacher once told her mother that Mechelke was reading Edgar Allan Poe. When she was 8, she added melody to her poetry and wrote her first song. Since then, she has continued writing, pulling inspiration from her imagination and experiences.

One of the most common themes in her songs is love.

“It’s always definitely the centerpiece because that’s the most deep, passionate emotion,” Mechelke said. “So I feel — in terms of creative expression — it’s always kind of the catalyst for that. It’s just a ton of sad songs, man — I need to write some happier songs.”

Music, Mechelke said, is cathartic. While a melody or phrase that gets stuck in her head sometimes leads to the creation of her songs, Mechelke often writes because of a powerful emotion she is feeling.

Her songs, while originating from heartbreak, then become exciting projects.

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“It usually comes out of an emotion that I’m dealing with that I either don’t want to talk about or that I do want to talk about, but I also just need to do something with,” Mechelke said. “I don’t want to let it just sit and ruminate inside of my body and fester and bubble up.”

Whenever she experiences heartbreak, Mechelke said she feels a tension in her body driving her to write down her emotions and release her feelings.

Usually, she will find a way to connect her emotions to a metaphor.

“There is something so encouraging and hopeful about making something beautiful out of something that’s really sad,” Mechelke said. “So I also think it’s just the fact that I get to take emotions that either could be negative or positive, and I get to make something beautiful out of it.”

Mechelke said her songs allow her to convey her relationships with her faith, loved ones, nature and herself. In examining her relationships, Mechelke learned her first love is Jesus Christ.

“It’s always been Jesus, and it always will be Jesus,” Mechelke said. “But it took me going through being in love for the first time in high school to really understand what that meant and how it’s meant to feel and how it’s meant to play out in my life.”

Her first relationship did not end well, Mechelke said. But after feeling the emotions of love and heartbreak for the first time, she wanted to be able to have a fulfilling and uplifting relationship with someone.

“That really allowed the Lord to kind of swoop in and be like, ‘Hi, I want to have that place in your heart, not like a silly teenage boy,’” Mechelke said.

“And I’m like, ‘OK,’ so it really transformed my perspective of the Lord and just increased my faith a lot.”

åñd g ñ ï g å r û ø ç ñ ë ø s ïñg ”Thërë ïs sømëth tïfûl øût û å ë b g ñ ï th ë m ø s ïñg høpëfûl åbøût måk såd.” ÿ ll å ë r s t’ å th g ñ øf sømëthï ñïør û j , ë lk ë h ç ë M ë –Çållï

“God is a Healer”

KIM YEUNG FINDS DEEPER IDENTITY IN CHRIST AFTER TENNIS INJURY Story by Annabelle Childers

Photo courtesy of Kim Yeung From serving on the tennis court to serving young adults in the church, a single injury changed the entire trajectory of Pepperdine alumna Kim Yeung’s life.

Yeung grew up as a competitive tennis player, working toward her life-long goal of playing at the collegiate level. After sustaining a knee injury that left her unable to walk, run or play tennis, Yeung found peace in her faith as she wrestled with understanding her identity and purpose — much like the biblical patriarch Jacob wrestled with God in the Bible, leaving Jacob with a limp.

“If God doesn’t heal me, this is my hip injury, my version of God’s mark on my life,” Yeung said.

At age 9, Yeung made her first big decision — choosing tennis over ballet. Advancing rapidly, Yeung’s life began to revolve around the sport.

“To say that tennis was everything accurately sums up life,” Yeung said.

Attending school for only half of the day in middle school, Yeung said she would leave at lunch to train.

All the while, Yeung said she was growing in her faith and was torn between spending busy weekends

at tennis tournaments or attending church and participating in youth group activities.

In her sophomore year of high school, Yeung tore what medical experts believed was her meniscus. However, unable to identify the exact injury, doctors could not perform surgery, which set Yeung on an 11-month journey to recovery.

No longer able to play tennis, Yeung instead attended church frequently, feeling the support of her church community through their words of wisdom.

“From what I know of God, they keep saying, ‘God is a healer,’” Yeung said. “I mean I haven’t experienced God as a healer in my life before, but they say, ‘God’s a healer,’ so maybe I should have a little more hope.”

Yeung hoped for physical but also spiritual healing — to find peace after losing her sense of identity.

“It was restoring who I am without all the trophies, without the ranking, without being known in my town for [playing tennis],” Yeung said. “Since tennis and faith were my two big things in my life, taking tennis out of the equation just made it all about my faith.”

Though Yeung has healed significantly, she said she is not able to play tennis to the same capacity she could before the injury. Through the injury, however, Yeung said she gained clarity for her future.

Yeung graduated in Fall 2020 with a bachelor’s degree in Religion and now serves as a youth minister for Vintage Church Malibu. “[Faith] is not just a Sunday thing for me, it’s not just a Wednesday night Bible study thing for me– it’s more than that,” Yeung said.

ålër ë h å s å ød G d ë ç ñ ë ï r t ëxpë ’ ñ ë v å å h s ’ d ø ”Ï G ’ , såÿ ÿ ë th t û b , bëførë ë f ï l ÿ little m a ïñ e v a h ould h s I e b o may s ’ , r e l a e h ë.” mørë høp lûmñå å , g ñ û ë - Kïm Ý 14

Å Jøûrñëÿ frøm Rûïñ tø Rësïlïëñçë 15

Cover photo by Anastasia Condolon and Lindsey Sullivan Story by Makena Huey

THE MALIBU COMMUNITY REFLECTS ON WOOLSEY

A childhood stuffed animal.

A Bible. A late parent’s watch. A home. A friend. Everything.

On Nov. 8, 2018, the Woolsey Fire led to unparalleled loss and forever changed Malibu — both the people and the land.

“There’s definitely beauty in the ashes,” said Laurie Kazmer, the first Malibu resident to move back into her rebuilt home 14 months after losing it in Woolsey.

“It definitely was one of the worst things that has ever happened to me, and I see where there has been good.”

Over two years after the flames burned nearly 100,000 acres and 1,500 structures, evacuated 3,000 people and killed three, community members reflected on the loss and the life, the ruin and the resilience, and everything in between. Nature has led the way toward recovery, but people are still stumbling behind.

The ruin Before she could return to see what was left of her life, Kazmer had to wait nearly two months for the fire department to declare her property safe from any hazards.

She could bear losing her own belongings, but the hardest part was losing her four children’s memorabilia.

“I had their baby pictures, a box of all the things they did over their childhood, the Christmas ornaments — everything that a mom would collect,” Kazmer said.

“I can’t get that back for them — I feel terrible. It’s just stuff, and we can’t take it with us, but it’s your stuff. It makes up who you are.”

Kazmer said she will always regret not staying to protect her home from the fire.

A lifelong resident of Malibu, now-Council Member Mikke Pierson said he felt prepared to fight Woolsey with his son and several neighbors in an effort to save as

many homes as possible. He will never forget the fire.

“It was big, it was scary, it was fast, it was loud,” Pierson said.

Brian Rooney, whose Cornell neighborhood had always been spared from wildfires during his 20 years of living there, said his apartment — along with around 200 of his neighbors’ homes — were all completely destroyed.

“The fact that I’ve been deeply affected by a fire is not terribly surprising,” Rooney said. “It’s sad, it’s unfortunate, it’s painful, but it’s not surprising.”

Rooney was able to save his camera equipment, 700 vinyls and CDs and his historical files now displayed in Pepperdine’s Special Collections. His apartment, however, remains an empty lot.

Keith and Debbie Larson, Malibu Lakeside Community Association officers, own one of the only homes on their street that survived Woolsey, and over two years after the fire, they said nothing has changed. None of their neighbors have rebuilt their homes yet. In fact, only a few have started.

Woolsey broke up the formerly close-knit community, with many of their neighbors leaving Malibu permanently. The Larsons said the past two years have been mentally and emotionally difficult.

“Driving through devastation — especially when you have invested so much of your life in the neighborhood trying to make it better and then just seeing it destroyed — is really hard,” Keith Larson said. “To have dozens of your closest friends lose everything they have is really hard, and it just takes a long time to deal with.”

Although they are grateful their house survived, the Larsons said guilt usually overpowers the gratefulness.

The morning after the Borderline shooting, then junior Jalen Frantal (2020) and his cross

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Alumnus Jalen Frantal (2020) examines what is left of his Calamigos Ranch house following the Woolsey Fire.

He said losing his physical belongings reminded him of the importance of relationships. Photos courtesy of Jalen Frantal.

country teammates boarded a bus to Sacramento for a race. During that bus ride, Frantal learned that Alaina Housley was killed. Once in Sacramento, he learned that the Woolsey Fire had burned down his Calamigos Ranch house.

“It wasn’t even on our minds because we were too busy focusing on the shooting,” Frantal said.

Nothing in Frantal’s house was recognizable except the fireplace.

His former home is now a parking lot.

With class and swim and dive practice cancelled due to the fires, alumna Taylor Basin (2019) and her older sister wondered how to spend their extra free time. But later, as the fire drew closer, they were told to evacuate. A year earlier, when they also had to evacuate, they overpacked only to return to their apartment the next day as normal. This time, they packed only a couple items of clothing.

Later, while watching the news, Basin saw that her Malibu Gardens apartment had burned, and absolutely nothing was left.

She only had two pairs of leggings and one set of pajamas.

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Basin said the biggest challenges were not having a sense of belonging and maintaining her grades after her laptop was lost in the fire. Although the whole Pepperdine community was processing the experience together, she felt as though no one could relate to her loss.

“Keeping up with school while also trying to rebuild a life would be the hardest part I think because everyone went through it, but there was only one other person who actually lost their apartment,” Basin said.

Screen Arts Professor Germano Saracco woke to the sound of his neighbor banging on his door warning him to evacuate, and that night, when the smoke was twice as big as the Malibu hills, he learned his home had burned down. He moved into a neighbor’s studio on the same street because he initially thought he would be able to save some of his belongings, but that was not the case. His house has not yet been rebuilt.

“Nothing — not a single nail was actually really saved,” said Saracco, who lost $450,000 worth

of camera equipment and a private collection of film, along with everything else in his apartment.

The rebuilding Only 26 of the 488 Malibu homes destroyed in Woolsey have been completely rebuilt as of March 31, according to the city’s Woolsey Fire Rebuild Statistics. Pierson said he acknowledges how difficult it is to build a home unexpectedly, and Christine Shen, Malibu’s environmental sustainability analyst, said helping victims rebuild is the city’s top priority.

Rooney, Kazmer and the Larsons said Malibu officials have been better advocates than LA County officials, and the biggest challenge for fire victims to overcome has been the county’s failure to expedite building permits.

“When you put the stress of losing everything in a fire and all that on top of the stress of getting a building permit, it’s just made a terrible situation for my neighbors,” Rooney said.

“It’s really unnecessary what they make people go through, and it would have been nice if LA County had followed through with their promise.”

Bureaucratic agencies did not seem to recognize victims’ suffering, Saracco said.

“They treat you like a number,” Saracco said. “The loss has been taken. There were things that were really irreplaceable in the end.”

After witnessing her neighbors’ immense loss, Malibu resident Evelin Weber created the Malibu Foundation — a nonprofit organization aiming to create a climate-resilient community and help individuals affected by Woolsey.

“We can’t just be the people who helped everybody else and then not help our neighbors,” Webster said.

“Literally while the fires were burning, we set up a foundation immediately. We felt like we had to — if it wasn’t us, then who?”

Immediately after the loss of her apartment, Basin said she was shocked to realize how many things she needed that she once took for granted — everything from a hair brush to furniture was gone. Her swim and dive teammates and coach gave her essentials and gear, Malibu had a drive for clothing donations, a GoFundMe page raised donations for her, and her friends at Malibu Fitness let her and her sister stay in their guest house.

“The initial thought I had seeing my apartment on TV was ‘I have nothing now,’ and then you come back and you have all these people who come together for you,” Basin said. “The beauty of it all was just the actual Malibu community coming together and helping each other.”

Even though the experience was difficult, regardless of whether one’s home was lost, many victims agreed Woolsey made the Malibu community even stronger. Individuals who lost everything were still willing to help neighbors. Kazmer, for example, said she is grateful for the kindness of strangers, who sent her donations and brought her food.

“It has taught me to open my eyes to the world and that when disaster happens, you can just do one small thing and maybe change somebody’s life,” Kazmer said.

When evacuating, Screen Arts Professor Germano Saracco made sure to save two things: a figurine of Jesus and a painting of the archangel Michael. Saracco said he found strength in his faith, knowing that he survived the tragedy even though his home did not. Photo courtesy of Germano Saracco.

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The reflection While Woolsey victims are struggling to physically rebuild, they are also struggling to emotionally rebuild, and although that process looks different for everyone, it can often be just as difficult. Pierson said he has seen his community experience intense emotions, from shock to trauma to outrage to sadness to gratefulness, after every fire in Malibu.

This fire was different, though.

“The impact of this one is big; this is the biggest fire in Malibu’s history,” Pierson said. “There’s still a lot of people rebuilding — a lot of scars.”

Weber and Shen both said they see many victims struggling with their mental health, unable to recover. They are aware Malibu will never be the same and strive to consider the invisible impact of Woolsey on their community.

“I’m not a fire victim, but I’m sure that there’s a lot of trauma having to evacuate and not knowing that when you come back your house will be standing,” Shen said.

“I think that is a long-term impact that our residents had to deal with.”

Rooney said despite mentally preparing himself for the possibility of a fire for decades, he has experienced post-traumatic stress since Woolsey’s flames tore through his neighborhood, and the smell of smoke from nearby fires often triggers him.

“And then the air was thick with smoke again, and it was a very strong smell, and I started yelling at no one,” Rooney said.

“That was an interesting experience because I am normally a pretty calm person.”

The destruction from the fire also changed victims’ priorities.

Basin said she learned that unlike material objects, people cannot be replaced, and now she focuses on making sure those close to her know how much she loves them.

“What matters most is the people,” said Basin, who found strength in her sister. “It really

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did just show me the importance of the people you have in your life and to just never take it for granted. I’m just so lucky it was just things that were lost and not people.”

Similarly, Frantal said his experience enabled him to realize what is most important in life, prompting him to invest in his friendships and spend more time outdoors.

“Losing my house and everything that I owned is a wake-up call that you can find a great career, earn a lot of money, have a nice house and a bunch of material possessions, but something can take that away in an instant,” Frantal said. “Relationships just really became so much more important because I realized that that’s what matters.”

During this time, Frantal said he relied on his friends, who helped him feel less alone, and his professors, who gave him grace.

One professor even encouraged him to journal about his experience, and sitting on the floor of what was left of his unrecognizable house allowed him to process.

Because he had always been the one to help those in need, Saracco said relying on others was difficult, but the fire taught him how to accept help without feeling ashamed.

“I like to think that it’s made me a better person,” Saracco said.

For Kazmer, the most significant outcome from Woolsey is how it changed her faith.

“I went from thinking that I’m in control to realizing that I have absolutely no control of my life and that God is in complete control,” Kazmer said. “God has perfect timing, and everything worked out for me.”

The resilience Despite their differing definitions of resilience, many Woolsey victims have embraced the idea of learning from their loss and finding purpose in their pain. Many,

like Frantal, believe resilience involves allowing adversity to make one a better person.

“Being resilient is one of the most important qualities you can have because life is going to be rough sometimes,” Frantal said.

The collective hardship made community members more willing to help each other, Weber said.

“There is a bond amongst Woolsey fire victims, and people became stronger together, but more work still needs to be done because recovery is one thing and resilience is another,” said Weber, who stressed the importance of caring for the most vulnerable.

The journey to resilience has been difficult, but Pierson said he has been moved by the ways in which residents supported one another.

“The Malibu community draws its strength from knowing how blessed we are to be in Malibu,” Pierson said. “We as humans tend to move forward — sometimes remembering, sometimes forgetting.”

Pierson, who knew two of the three people who died during the fire, said he encourages individuals not to become complacent when it comes to planning for emergencies.

“Never forget, and be prepared,” Pierson said.

Saracco said he will never forget the comfort he found in knowing he was not alone: He had others, and he had God. Despite the devastation, he knew he would survive the struggle regardless of whether his home did.

“Oh my God, I had help; I am a man of faith,” said Saracco, who made sure to save two things before he fled the fire: a figurine of Jesus and a painting of the archangel Michael. “Somehow, I always knew I would be OK.” Although she would not want to relive her experience, Kazmer said she is not bitter because she knows she has the strength to rebuild. She has a powerful message for anyone impacted by tragedy.

Evelin Weber, executive director of the Malibu Foundation, aims to create a climate-resilient community and help individuals affected by Woolsey. She said it is crucial to help one’s neighbors, especially those who are most vulnerable. Photo courtesy of ReJeana Goldsborough, Malibu Foundation.

“You can get through it and you can rebuild and your life can go on again,” Kazmer said.

The regrowth Those who witnessed the wreckage of Woolsey saw the land transform from ruin to regrowth.

By finding beauty through the ashes, they gained hope that recovery was possible.

Frantal noted the parallel between the resilience of the environment and the Malibu community following the fire.

“No matter what, nature is going to rebuild,” Frantal said. “The people who were able to take this and be intentionally resilient were also growing at the same rate. …

As the land is recovering, it is the physical representation of the people who are also recovering.”

Knowing that fire is a natural, withstandable occurrence was a source of comfort for Rooney.

“There’s an understanding that fire is a way of life up in these mountains, and it’s just kind of something that’s going to happen,” Rooney said. “I may have been feeling a little bit safer, a little bit more protected, but Mother Nature did not help us this time.”

Seeing and hearing the pain of his community, Pierson said the fire taught him the importance of considering the ways in which residents and the environment impact each other.

“I absolutely think that people recover slower,” Pierson said.

“The land understands fire and deals with it — Malibu citizens, not so much. A lot of people were shocked to their core that a fire like this could happen. To me it wasn’t if, it was when.”

Like many Malibu residents, Pierson said he will forever be inspired by the resilient nature of the land.

“Woolsey came through and everything was gone — to an extent I had never seen; it did not look like anything would survive,” Pierson said. “Everything is fine except the one thing that doesn’t come back — that’s the houses.

They don’t regrow themselves.

They are not resilient.”

After living in her rebuilt home for over a year, Kazmer said she has found strength in knowing she has not only survived but thrived after losing everything.

“The healing of the land has to happen first,” Kazmer said. “People have to get back to what they had before they can start healing themselves.”

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Nature Leads the Way Story by Makena Huey

Members of the Malibu community and the Malibu Foundation help restore the hillsides following the Woolsey Fire. Malibu is home to some of the world’s most fire-adapted plants, and after seven to 10 years, native plants can fully recover. Photos courtesy of ReJeana Goldsborough, Malibu Foundation.

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Malibu’s native plants are inherently resilient.

Biodiverse and adapted to fire, some plants actually need fire to grow, as the heat cracks the seed’s coating and allows it to germinate. Other plants’ roots survive the fire and hold the land together to prevent mudslides. Biology Professor Helen Holmlund said she finds hope in this seemingly choreographed series of fire followers.

“Beauty through ashes is a great way to describe the Santa Monica Mountains after a fire because for the first few months all you see is moonscape,” Holmlund said. “It looks like life is gone, and it’s not gone at all — it’s just getting ready to come back in a new way.”

Woolsey was the largest wildfire in Malibu — almost 2.5 times bigger in size than the 1993 Green Meadow Fire, said Marti Witter, fire ecologist for the National Park Service. Witter said Woolsey drew attention to increased fire frequency and severity and, like most wildfires, could have been prevented.

Most fires start from human factors, such as arcing power lines, and then spread due to natural forces, such as the Santa Ana winds, Witter said.

Climate change, however, has resulted in longer and more severe droughts. Although Malibu is home to some of the most dehydration-tolerant plants in the world, they can still fuel fires.

For Christine Shen, Malibu’s environmental sustainability analyst, making Malibu environmentally sustainable involves combatting the impacts of climate change, including the increase in wildfires.

To prevent a repeat of Woolsey, the City of Malibu conducts Home Ignition Zone Assessments and enforces the Fire-Resistant Landscaping Ordinance, while also raising awareness about the intersection between natural hazard risk and climate change.

“The climate disasters are here, and there are ways that we can help mitigate that,” Shen said.

When protecting one’s home, Witter said residents should be aware that embers are often more dangerous than flames, and the vegetation within 100 feet of the home is most important to clear.

“My hope is that people are really recognizing what needs to be done to effectively prevent wildfire and also just to make homes more resistant to burning down,” Witter said.

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Ultimately, Holmlund and Witter agreed that nature is generally more resilient than humans: Seedlings can recover within three months of a fire, and after seven years, the chaparral’s plants are mature. Wildfires often have a more devastating impact on people than plants.

“When people are living in this kind of landscape, there can never be a truly 100% happy story because the devastation has just been so, so bad for communities,” Witter said. “It’s a long, hard road to recovery for the people whose homes burned.”

Witter also said she was amazed at the quick recovery of the plants after Woolsey, which she credits to the heavy rainfall in the spring.

“The post-fire environment really was amazing,” Witter said. “There is just a whole range of greens and yellows, and you have to learn to love it, but it’s quite beautiful.”

Malibu’s animals also embody resilience.

Some local animals perished or relocated during Woolsey, but others withstood the heat, with new and even endangered species inhabiting the land following the fire. Witter said the animal response depends entirely on the plant response.

“We were really surprised that after the fire, even in unburned areas and burned areas, we saw more diversity of plants than we’ve seen in any other time ever,” Witter said. “It really was just magical.”

Despite plants’ ability to survive natural disasters, Holmlund said residents need to be more mindful of how their actions can alter Malibu’s landscape. When the fire return interval is shorter than the amount of time it takes for plants to fully recover, their ability to do so breaks down, and some plants on Pepperdine’s campus are now at risk of extinction.

“Nature is beautiful and resilient, but humans still have an impact on it,” Holmlund said.

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From Subway to the ER

BRANDON GILLE GOES ON A PAINFULLY UNIQUE FIRST DATE Story by Addison Whiten

Photo courtesy of Brandon Gille What’s the most romantic activity for a first date? Eating at a fancy restaurant? Sitting on the beach? Maybe a trip to the emergency room?

Brandon Gille, senior Theatre Music contract major, went on a first date in February 2020 that ended with a trip to the ER after a surfing accident.

Although the date didn’t go as planned, Gille said it bonded him and the Pepperdine woman he asked to remain unnamed.

“I’m just glad I had that experience with her,” Gille said. “There’s an unending bond.”

Gille said he met her while eating at a Subway in Santa Monica one afternoon.

“I was lining up, and I was ready to get my meatball marinara sandwich, and from the corner of my eye, I just saw a girl that I was really attracted to,” Gille said. “She was eating, and I didn’t know what to do, so I just kept on glancing over in her direction.”

She eventually noticed him looking at her. They started talking, and Gille found out she was also a Pepperdine student. After their first meeting, she and Gille hung out a few times over the next month before finally going on an official date. They had surfing as a common interest, so Gille said they planned to go together early one weekend morning.

“We went down to Laguna, and we floated out a good distance into the ocean and we just waited for the sunrise,” Gille said.

The morning was going really well, Gille said, and he wanted to try to do something to impress her even though he wasn’t an expert surfer. That’s when tragedy struck.

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“I stood on my board, and I tried to do some type of maneuver on a medium-sized wave, and I tripped on the board,” Gille said. “I did a front flip, and the waves ate me up. I was banged up everywhere, and I landed on a rock of coral.”

Gille said after his accident, he and his date had to sit in a hospital for a few hours, but it was a successful outing, regardless of the location.

“She thought the situation was funny because she appreciated how hard I was working to try to make it a good experience for her,” Gille said. “At the time, she thought it was super hilarious that I just failed at, you know, trying to be a charmer.”

This first date left Gille in crutches for the rest of the semester, and although he and his date are just friends now, he said he learned a lot about himself and dating in general.

“The moral of the story here is that you should do your best to be you, and if you make a fool out of yourself, it’s OK because we’re all human and we’re not perfect,” Gille said. “So just try to be yourself and be the best you can be.”

is that e r e h y r o f the st o l a r o m e h “T , and if u o y e b to best r u o y o d ld u you sho OK ’s t i , lf e s r u o out of y l o o f a e k a you m ’re not e w d n a , n a all hum e r ’ e w e s u beca perfect.” senior , e ll i G n o d - Bran

Hailey Serrano Uses TikTok to Spread Love and Share her Faith Story by Taylor Gather

Photo courtesy of Hailey Serrano While many influencers’ content revolves around fitness or lifestyle, senior Hailey Serrano rose to stardom by making videos about the last thing she thought would bring her overnight fame — her faith.

The 23-year-old, who goes by Hailey Julia on social media, said she downloaded TikTok in 2019 to make fun, lighthearted videos with her suitemates after transferring to Pepperdine. Little did she know, her following would steadily grow to over 300,000 followers over the course of the next year.

“It was just one of those things on social media where I wanted to spread the love of Jesus just by being who I am,” Serrano said.

Serrano said she grew up in a strong, nondenominational Christian household. Because much of her life revolved around her religious upbringing, she said she wanted to create content that would not only influence but inspire people on their faith journeys.

“Growing up, I’ve always wanted to be an entertainer,” Serrano said. “The first TikTok that I ever made I just combined my love for Christ and my goofiness together.”

While her rise to fame occurred after candidly talking about Christianity, Serrano said her faith hasn’t always been as strong as it is now. She said she felt spiritually disconnected from God while attending the Fashion Institute of Technology in

Manhattan and wanted to return to her family’s Christian roots.

“My faith was definitely at a plateau,” Serrano said. “But coming to Pepperdine, my relationship with God has increased so much. The community is just awesome. This is the first time in my life that I’ve literally had Christian friends.”

Looking for a church to call her own, Serrano and her suitemates started to attend Pepperdine Executive Vice President Gary Hanson and his wife Tracey Hanson’s house church, where she returned to her faith and eventually was baptized.

“I was always looking for a church to call home, and this one was one that I actually liked and felt at home,” Serrano said. “Going to house church and having that community and also my friend, Sarah, definitely helped me make the decision to get baptized at Surfrider Beach.”

After finding her foundation in Christianity and becoming a religious influencer, Serrano said she befriended other Christian TikTok creators who helped her grow in her faith and created opportunities for others to grow into theirs.

Serrano said her newfound friends inspired her to financially assist college students like herself, since she had been given numerous opportunities.

“I partnered up with bold.org to create the Hailey Julia ‘Jesus Changed my Life’ scholarship,” Serrano said. “Because I was incredibly blessed with financial support, I really wanted to bless other students too.”

Regardless of the fame, Serrano said she just wants to spread the message of Christ.

“No matter what your circumstances are, still keep leaning on the Lord,” Serrano said. “Even if you are living your best life, and everything is going right for you, or even if it’s the worst of circumstances, there’s nothing better than having that comfort that comes from leaning on the Lord.”

things on e s o th f o e n o “It was just the d a e r p s to d te n e I wa r e h w a i d e m l socia am.“ I o h w g n i e b just by s u s e J f o e lov enior s , o n a r r e S - Hailey 24

Healing Comes in Waves THE GRIEVING PROCESS & HONORING THE LIVES OF LOVED ONES Story by Emily Shaw Photo illustration by Anastasia Condolon Art by Ally Armstrong The grieving process involves numerous psychological, cultural and religious components, including important mourning practices. Due to the COVID-19 pandemic, many individuals have been forced to experience loss differently than they might have expected.

Sammie Wuensche

When one first learns a loved one has died, it can feel overwhelming, perhaps unforeseen — like getting lost in a tidal wave.

One might be out in the ocean for a while feeling disoriented and confused. Over time, memories of the loved one come back, sometimes unexpectedly — even when the water appears to be calm. As time continues on, the waves can become almost sweet, gentle reminders of the beloved.

This is one way Connie Horton, vice president for Student Affairs, said she views grief after her father died in 2015. Although she still feels sad, she said there is a sweetness when something reminds her of her father.

“Every time there’s a Red-tailed Hawk that goes by, I can almost hear his voice saying, ‘I think that’s a Red-tailed Hawk,’ and then getting the binoculars,” Horton said. “I’m grateful that he taught me to appreciate nature and to pay attention, and it becomes like this reflective moment versus this wave that knocks me over.”

Each person’s experience with grief does not look the same. One’s cultural and religious background plays a significant role in the grieving process. COVID-19 has also forced many individuals to experience loss differently.

The psychology of grief Some understand the mourning process through the Kübler-Ross model, also known as the five stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance.

Elizabeth Mancuso, Psychology professor and clinical psychologist, said she thinks the model gives people a language to understand and normalize grief.

People do not often experience the different “stages” in a linear or orderly fashion, Mancuso said.

Instead, people vacillate between them.

“It’s going to look different for everyone,” Mancuso said. “Whatever it looks like for you is normal, and it’s good, and it’s part of the grieving process.”

Horton, a psychologist and former director of the Pepperdine Counseling Center, said many factors affect how a person responds psychologically to the loss of a loved one, including the nature and timing of the death, the nature of the relationship with the loved one, how one is doing overall before the death and their personality and social support.

Horton said for some, the grieving process can be “complicated,” especially if the relationship between an individual and their loved one was tense.

Senior Ani Harutyunyan said she and her family are still in shock and struggling to accept that her grandfather died unexpectedly because of how strong and healthy he was. The true cause of his death is still not entirely known.

DENIAL

It all began when Harutyunyan’s grandmother contracted COVID-19 and suffered from the symptoms. Harutyunyan said she thinks it affected her grandpa — who did not get the virus himself — to see his wife of 52 years in pain. Harutyunyan noticed that he was not acting like his usual, enthusiastic self.

On Jan. 6, Harutyunyan’s grandpa collapsed and was rushed to the hospital. Harutyunyan said the hospital’s regulations did not allow the family to go into the ICU to see him, so they would try to FaceTime him as much as they could, even though he couldn’t verbally respond because he was on life support.

Harutyunyan said she and her family believe the hospital did not tell them the truth about what was going on with her grandpa’s condition.

“We don’t know what was happening,” Harutyunyan said. “Since he stepped foot into the hospital, everything has been a blur for us, and I think that’s what makes it harder for us to cope sometimes — just thinking about how sudden everything was and how we knew nothing.”

Harutyunyan and her aunt eventually fought with the hospital to honor his wishes to die peacefully in his own home surrounded by family. When they brought him home, Harutyunan spent three days next to her grandpa, holding his hand and speaking to him until someone arrived to pull the plug.

Sophomore Sammie Wuensche lost her grandfather due to COVID-19 near the end of November.

Wuensche said before her “popo” died, the hospital let Wuensche’s grandma see him in person, and all of their grandchildren called her phone to say their final goodbyes.

“It must have been so hard because he had to do it alone,” Wuensche said. “They let my grandma in at the very end, and she had to go in a full hazmat suit, and so it wasn’t even like she was really there, so he was literally doing it by himself.”

Susan Giboney, retired Pepperdine professor of Education and certified family life educator, lost her husband of 36 years Dec. 6, 1996. Terry Giboney was only 57 when he died of colon cancer. Both educators, she and Terry would teach and counsel couples and parents together.

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ANGER

Giboney and her family were shocked when they first heard the diagnosis, since Terry was such a healthy person. Giboney said preparing for Terry’s death was extremely painful, and she especially hated that God was breaking up her team.

“I never particularly ‘felt sorry for myself,’ except I was so sorry that I had to live life without him,” Giboney said.

Life circumstances at the time of a death can also affect the grieving process, Horton said. Perhaps a person had just lost their job or was put on probation at school, or perhaps the person had experienced other recent deaths of people close to them. The stress can then become cumulative.

Wuensche lost three grandparents in the span of 14 months and said even though this past year has been really difficult for her and her family, they have become closer through it all.

Horton said the loss of a loved one can feel like a “wind blowing you far over,” and social support, positive self-talk and self-care — as well as other meaningful, practical processes — can help one start to find their way back.

Horton encourages those grieving to avoid telling themselves they’re supposed to be feeling a certain way or supposed to be at a certain “stage” in their grieving process.

Grief is already a heavy brick to carry, Horton said, and adding the weight of frustration, impatience or guilt over the speed or means of processing grief makes that already substantial burden even heavier.

How religion affects the grieving process University Chaplain Sara Barton said in a community as large as Pepperdine, there is always someone going through grief. The Pepperdine community in particular has been in a state of grief since the Woolsey Fire and the loss of Alaina Housley in Fall 2018.

Barton said even though Pepperdine is a Christian university, multifaith understanding is important in her role. Barton emphasizes honoring the individual’s faith practices when memorializing them and serving the individual’s friends and family.

When Barton ministers to Christians in mourning, she emphasizes that Jesus invites people to grieve.

“The Bible says that Jesus was a man of sorrows, and He was acquainted with grief; He wept for others,” Barton said. “And this is also important: He even wept for His own pain in the Garden of Gethsemane,

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and He cried out in lament on the cross, ‘My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?’ That is a call of grief.”

One of the common ways people cope is by relying on their faith. Mancuso said religious coping can have a positive or negative impact on a person.

Mancuso said one positive way to religiously cope is called benevolent religious reappraisal, which is when someone sees a situation in a new, more positive light because of their faith. For example, when someone loses a loved one, they might believe that through their pain they have gained a deeper relationship with God or God has made them stronger.

“Religious surrender — turning it over to God, doing what you can to put it in God’s hands, rather than to try to take control of that situation yourself — might actually be a very adaptive way of coping in that situation, a way of coming to peace,” Mancuso said.

Giboney said a blindly optimistic way of looking at life did not drive her faith in God, but rather a strength beyond herself.

“I could yell and scream at the Lord and He could take it; He understood that,” Giboney said.

Negative religious coping, also called spiritual struggle, is religious coping that can be harmful to the individual, Mancuso said. For example, a person might believe that God took away a person from their life as punishment for something they did.

“You can imagine how difficult or how stressful that belief is for someone,” Mancuso said. “That’s a negative way that people might cope with the grief experience or with their loss.”

It is important for Christian worship services to intentionally make space for grief and lament, Barton said. She thinks the Psalms in particular can guide church communities in fostering a place for all experiences of human life, including sadness, anger, fear, frustration and joy.

“We should realize that pretty much every time we ever gather, for any worship gathering, there are people present who are grieving,” Barton said.

The significance of mourning rituals Mancuso said another part of religious coping is engaging in symbolic rituals that allow people to say goodbye to the dead.

Part of the psychological significance of engaging in these rituals is that they offer an experience that helps people think about the grieving process differently and connect with others.

In addition to a private family burial service, Giboney said they also had a memorial service at Pepperdine’s Firestone Fieldhouse where about 1,000 people attended.

“My husband said he wanted a celebration of life,” Giboney said. “And he said, ‘Don’t drag the

songs!’ He was a very funny man, but he wanted it to be a celebration and for people to be encouraged.”

Wuensche said at her grandpa’s funeral, the military folded and presented the United States flag in her grandpa’s honor, as he was a veteran.

Ari Schwarzberg, rabbi-in-residence at Pepperdine, said practices surrounding death are extremely meaningful in Judaism, in order to honor the dead and comfort those in mourning.

Jews will tear their clothes when they hear of the loss of a close relative and engage in a seven-day mourning period called “shiva.” Schwarzberg said this is typically when the mourners, or close relatives, gather together in one home and welcome visitors.

“Our communities have tremendous emphasis around ensuring that the mourners are stable and are taken care of, providing meals for them, and, of course, people visiting them,” Schwarzberg said.

“This is some of the great work that synagogues and our community organizations do. It’s really quite beautiful.”

How the COVID-19 pandemic altered grief Barton wrote a Christianity Today article about how her personal grief over the loss of her mom was “deferred” when the Pepperdine community faced a mass shooting and the Woolsey wildfire two weeks after her mom died.

“Everything had changed because our whole community was now grieving, and my personal grief was put on hold as I cared for other people,” Barton said. “I think right now, a lot of people are having that experience — their grief is on hold in an unprecedented way.”

Barton said it seems the whole world is grieving because of the COVID-19 pandemic.

“What is already a lonely journey is even more lonely,” Barton said. “Because many people haven’t been able to be with their loved ones even in their last minutes of life due to hospital restrictions, and they haven’t been able to gather and mourn with family and with communities of faith.”

Harutyunyan said her family wanted her grandfather’s body to be at rest as soon as possible, but there was a long wait at the funeral home. They eventually held the funeral service outdoors March 18. Guests wore masks and socially distanced.

Mancuso said for many people, the inability to grieve or lean on the support of others in ways they expected can increase the feeling of pain.

“People feel like they’re being robbed twice,” Mancuso said. “They’re being robbed of their loved one, they have that loss, but then it’s a double loss because they can’t come together with others and grieve the way they normally would.”

People have been trying to simulate online or in contactless ways the physical support or presence

they would normally give to the bereaved through delivering food and attending memorial services on Zoom. Mancuso said while these things are still meaningful, it’s not the same as being physically present with one another.

Barton said that although streaming funeral services is not the same, she has appreciated the creative ways people have mourned their loved ones.

One friend’s family honored his mother by making Chinese dumplings. Another friend lost her husband and created an art exhibit of her spouse’s clothes.

A group of friends planted a tree for a widow in her front yard in memory of her husband.

Wuensche and her family could not have in-person visitations due to COVID-19 guidelines, so they did a drive-by visitation.

“Everybody knew my Popo,” Wuensche said. “Literally the entire town drove by, and it was all people 60 and older — just through the car — telling my grandma how sorry they were and how much they loved him.”

Wuensche said they later held a funeral where she sang hymns and played guitar, and they livestreamed it so others could watch from home.

Both Barton and Wuensche said that as things reopen, it’s natural that people will want to celebrate, but that they should also remember some are still grieving.

The legacy loved ones leave behind Horton said the objects she received when her grandma and dad died have helped remind her of memories with them. She has her dad’s binoculars, which he would use to appreciate animals and nature, as well as her grandma’s mixing bowl from when they used to bake apple pies together when Horton was young.

People knew Horton’s grandpa, who also died, to be incredibly generous with his family and people around him, and Horton said he inspires her to go the extra mile like he did.

“I was blessed by his generosity, so how will I bless others?” Horton said. “Blessing for a blessing kind of idea. How will I pay it forward?”

Giboney said her husband’s legacy continues to bless her children, her grandchildren and many others who were touched by his life.

A couple weeks before he died, Terry told Giboney he left her a gift for their anniversary, which fell about four days after his death. He had given her a beautiful ring along with a note that read, “It sparkles like our marriage.”

BARGAINING 28

DEPRESSION

Giboney also gathered all of the poems Terry wrote her throughout their relationship into a book, titling it “Love Letters in the Sand,” in memory of one of their first dates where they saw a movie with the same title.

Terry wrote a statement of his faith before he died, which Giboney keeps framed beside her bed.

Giboney said it still comforts her to read it.

Giboney also lives out her husband’s legacy by continuing to teach the premarital class they taught together and be a part of the missions committee at their church, as she and Terry had served as missionaries together in Japan.

Harutyunyan said her grandpa was a hardworking man who brought his family from Armenia to America. Harutyunyan, her brother and her cousins all adopted their grandpa’s work ethic and nevergive-up attitude.

“I’m working to be a better version of myself and trying to adapt these characteristics that my grandpa had,” Harutyunyan said. “Almost as if to try to fill the shoes that he left behind, someone who takes care of other people when they need it, be the caregiver and the one in charge, the one people can rely on.”

Harutyunyan is studying psychology and premed, and she said she looks forward to the day she becomes a doctor and has her last name — her grandpa’s name — sewn onto her white lab coat.

Wuensche’s grandfather immigrated to the United States from Germany. Wuensche said her grandpa had such genuine love for other people and was gifted in making others feel heard and valued.

“In his physical absence, I’ve definitely been paying more attention to how I can reflect his spirit in that way, and how I want to make people feel welcomed and be a person that fosters community because that was something that he was so actively engaged in every day,” Wuensche said.

Wuensche said what she has found comforting through this time is knowing that “this too shall pass,” even though that doesn’t mean the grieving process is going to be easy.

“The legacies of people that we love cannot be diminished by the power of a pandemic,” Wuensche said. “The strengths of people’s spirits are so much stronger than the grievances we experienced as a result of the sufferings of this world. And that’s just a truth to hold on to, regardless of religion, that this is a season, and it’s a very hard season, but seasons change and so do hearts in their processing of grief.”

RESOURCES FOR SUPPORT IN THE GRIEVING PROCESS: Pepperdine Counseling Center Group Counseling Individual Counseling Pepperdine Office of the Chaplain Spiritual Mentoring Program

ACCEPTANCE

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Alexa Rydell Accepts Jesus in a Hammock Story by Claire Lee While sitting in a hammock outside of her firstyear dorm on campus, Alexa Rydell decided to commit her life to Jesus.

Rydell, now a senior Liberal Arts for Education major, said she didn’t really know God when she came to Pepperdine. After months of honest conversations, house Bible studies and worship moments, she said her heart caved while sitting in a hammock outside of Hayes.

“I was listening to worship music, and I started crying, and I was like, ‘I want to accept Jesus,’” Rydell said.

Rydell said she grew up going to church with her family and attended religious middle and high schools. It was when she started college that Rydell said she realized she didn’t have a strong faith.

“I believed in God, but I just believed in God because it was what was around me, and I didn’t have my own personal relationship with Jesus,” Rydell said. “I didn’t realize that until coming to Pepperdine.”

During her first year, Rydell said she sought out mentorship from her spiritual life advisor and two resident advisors and opened up about topics she didn’t know she needed healing from.

“I needed a lot of help,” Rydell said. “People around me were so kind to me and gave me that help and that mentorship and sat with me and went through with me whatever I felt comfortable sharing.”

Rydell said her spiritual mentors were willing to walk with her and love her as she processed challenging moments.

“I saw God a lot through that because it would always be conversations where I’d be talking about something, and that person would lead it back to God or be like, ‘Can I pray for you?’” Rydell said. “It’s like one of those things — you sit there and you’re like, ‘Yeah, sure. I guess you can pray for me?’ But I think it made such an impact.”

Rydell said these experiences made her realize the authenticity of their faith.

“These aren’t just the Christians that roll up to church on Sunday and hang out, get a donut after and peace out,” Rydell said. “These are people who you really can turn to the Lord with every day, all the time, and that was really important to me.”

Rydell said she felt lucky to get this spiritual guidance during her first year. During her later years at Pepperdine, she encountered peers who caused

Photo courtesy of Alexa Rydell her to stumble in her walk with God and saw others, who claimed to be Christian, hurt some of her friends.

“God really was like, ‘I’mma put some good people in your life,’” Rydell said.

Despite her confusion as a first-year student, Rydell said she learned more about God through her house Bible studies and connected with God the most when she attended worship sessions at The Well.

After talking through her decision from the hammock and commitment with her SLA, Rydell’s SLA baptized her April 21, 2018 at Ralph’s Beach.

“Looking back on it now, God has been slowly softening my heart this entire time,” Rydell wrote in her journal the day before she was baptized.

Now, as someone who has spiritually grown over the past three years, Rydell said she is digging deeper into her faith with her church community. Rydell has also been leading Greek Life Bible studies for several semesters and currently hosts a Bible study for all affiliated first-year and sophomore women through InterVarsity.

ÿ çåñ ll å ë r û ø ÿ lë whø p ø ë p ë r å ë ”Thës ll thë å , ÿ å d ÿ r th ëvë ï w d r ø L më.” tûrñ tø thë tø t ñ tå r ø p m ëållÿ ï r s å w t å tïmë, åñd th ñïør ë s , ll ë d ÿ - Ålëxå R 30

Nicholas Olson Finds Peace in his Romantic Relationship Story by Samantha Torre Junior Biology major Nicholas Olson finds peace in both the world around him and the people in it.

He finds peace in such varied locations as crowded cafes, Malibu canyons, hanging out at the beach or outdoors looking at the stars. But spending time with his girlfriend, Valentina Monteagudo, who he met while studying abroad in Buenos Aires, brings him the most tranquility.

“There’s a lot of times where we’re together, and things just kind of like, slow down, and in a way, it seems like we almost separate from the reality that’s going on around us,” Olson said.

Monteagudo lives in Argentina, which can make seeing each other difficult, Olson said. Monteagudo is friends with a lot of the students in the program, and she and Olson began dating while he was abroad in Fall 2019. COVID-19 restrictions have made international travel more difficult. While Olson cannot visit his girlfriend, she was able to visit him over winter break.

“Thank God we live in today’s times [where] we have FaceTime and like Snapchat so we can talk a lot, even if we can’t be like, physically next to each other talking, which is so crucial, just so we can remain in contact,” Olson said.

Something Olson said he has struggled with is seeing other couples who live near each other and are able to spend time together often and enjoy going out on conventional dates with each other.

“You can kind of make up for it when you’re together,” Olson said. “You can kind of jam pack them all in, and it makes, in a lot of ways, a lot of those moments more special because you realize that each time you’re together you only have another week or like another month.”

When they are apart, Olson said he and Monteagudo find ways to talk to each other nearly every day. They connect with each other through online games such as Mario Kart or by watching movies together using the Netflix Watch Party app. These virtual interactions help them stay close emotionally when they are physically far apart.

Olson said being long distance makes him and Monteagudo lose out on a lot of time that could be spent together. It is important for him to make the most out of each moment with her.

“You have to be way more intentional with what you do when you’re together because you don’t have an endless amount of time to do things,” Olson said.

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Photo courtesy of Nicholas Olson

wë’rë ë r ë h w s ë t øf tïm lø å ’s ë r ë h ”T like, f o d n i k st ings ju th d n a , r e togeth ke li s m e e s t i a way, n i d n a , n slow dow that ’s ty li a e r e th from te a r a p e s st we almo d ûs.” ñ û ø r å ñ ø g gøïñ ûñïør j , ñ ø ls Ø s – Ñïçhølå

Cecily Breeding

Finding Spiritual Rest in an Anxious World Story by Lindsey Sullivan Photo by Anatasia Condolon Ancient civilizations possessed something modern cultures appear to be missing — a steady awareness of the divine.

The world is not only becoming increasingly secularized, but people are growing more anxious, isolated and depressed than ever previously reported.

One third of Americans regularly experience symptoms of depression and anxiety, according to a U.S. Census Bureau survey conducted in 2020.

Perhaps the modern problem of unrest plaguing humans is not just a physical condition, but as Religion Professor Ron Highfield said, a spiritual one.

“We’re missing a connection to the infinite and perfect divine reality that is

the only thing that can truly satisfy us,” Highfield said.

This connection, Highfield said, changes everything because God is the rest many are seeking. After studying theology for over 30 years, Highfield said he has found God to be a reliable source of peace and hope in an ever-changing world.

“If we had that hope, then we could — as Augustine said — we could rest in that hope,” Highfield said. “That is we could have peace knowing that trying to produce it on our own, trying to make ourselves worthy of other people’s admiration, or worthy of dignity, or happy, is a futile enterprise.”

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”Ït’s å vålïd end to just be with Him. He’s w orth ït — He’s su premely valuable.”

— Lisa Sm ith, English profe ssor

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In other words, Highfield said he finds peace by resting in the already-present, steadfast love God has for creation.

Soaking prayer Speaking about rest is one thing, but actually putting it into practice can be difficult for some. English Professor Lisa Smith said she found a better understanding of rest when she began linking the experience of rest to the activity of prayer.

She said she sees rest as a spiritual discipline, in that there are skills one can learn to make rest easier and that growth happens incrementally.

One practice she has developed over the years is called soaking prayer, which is a kind of meditation focused on simply being with God, rather than praying for someone or something.

“There’s many reasons that we will want to have a dialogue with God and we will want to be in His presence,” Smith said. “Soaking prayer specifically is just designed to connect with Him on a spirit-to-spirit level. It’s designed for the Holy Spirit in me to connect with the Spirit of God.” This activity can be aided by creating a comfortable atmosphere — lighting a candle, lying down, listening to worship music and focusing on breathing. Smith said once she gets her body and mind into a state of stillness first, it is easier for her spirit to follow.

Just like any other discipline, Smith said soaking prayer takes practice and consistency to become more comfortable with the activity of waiting on God. “Soaking prayer won’t always be easy; it won’t always be this time of literally soaking in God’s presence,” Smith said. “[There] will be times of

writhing around, your spirit trying to connect with God, and those are the times you have to try to pursue rest as much as you can.”

Smith said soaking prayer is a special kind of discipline because it is the act of showing up just for God Himself, rather than for what He can provide, thus reorienting the human heart to delight in His presence.

“It’s a valid end to just be with Him,” Smith said. “He’s worth it — He’s supremely valuable.”

The art of surrender Senior Amara West felt the need for rest in a tangible way when her doctors diagnosed her with a traumatic brain injury in 2019. The injury prevented her from being able to perform physical activities like walking, holding a conversation or braiding her hair.

She began to recover in January 2020, right before the pandemic shut everything down. During this time, West was redefining her values in more than one way: She changed her major, moved back home and began to seek out a way to find rest.

“That’s when I really honed in on release and surrender to God because everything is not promised,” West said.

One thing that West said has helped her during this time is intentionally creating space in her schedule to rest. Some of these moments include going for a walk in between classes, reading Scripture and creating an evening routine to wind down before bed.

As part of this routine, West practices breathing exercises while showering to envision the water washing the day away, allowing her to surrender everything to God. Some nights before she falls asleep, West said she will lie in bed

itual r i p s a th i w e case th s y a lw a s do the ”As i d n a p u w o h to just s e v a h e w , e pirit S disciplin e th t a th nd trust a e c ti c a r p e work, do th ere.” th s u ts e e m moves and ructor st n i a g o y d e r ng, sac i d e e r B ly i c — Ce with her face and palms facing upward to symbolize the act of release.

She said this process of physically releasing the guilt of each day gives her the grace to keep going.

“It’s hard once you get into the rhythm of it to then describe it,” West said. “But also, acknowledging that it’s not always an easy thing to do, even when you’re in the habit of doing it.”

Senior Annie Little said she also finds the power to connect with God by creating intentional space in her mind and incorporating certain mindful practices throughout her day.

One practice Little learned from yoga is what she calls a “body checkin,” where she will pause from what she is doing and take inventory of the sights, sounds, smells, taste and feel of her surroundings.

This and other meditative practices help Little to be present in the moment, thus reducing her anxiety.

They also help her to make the most of special memories so that she can recall them in the future and find meaning and joy in moments where she is experiencing stress or hopelessness.

Freedom in discipline Cecily Breeding, who studied the connection between physical movement and spiritual activity as a graduate student in religion at Pepperdine, said rest is not the absence of work, but rather it is the natural conclusion and continuation of work.

Breeding is a sacred yoga instructor and physical fitness enthusiast

who practices CrossFit and other rigorous strength-training exercises. She said she likens the perceived tension between work and rest to the interplay between discipline and freedom.

“Discipline and freedom are not opposites of each other,” Breeding said. “But only when you choose proper disciplines can you enjoy the fruits of freedom that emerge from that.”

As an example, Breeding said the work she puts into her body at the gym and the discipline it requires provides her with the freedom to do things she wouldn’t normally be able to, like move heavy objects in her home without asking for help.

Beyond this freedom, Breeding said she believes all physical activity can be a spiritual discipline. Whether it be yoga, strength training or meditation, all of these things are extensions of her ability to reflect the divine life of God to others.

“As is always the case with a spiritual discipline, we have to just show up and do the work, do the practice and trust that the Spirit moves and meets us there,” Breeding said.

Though it is easy to forget, Highfield said remembering who God is and trusting in Him might be the antidote to anxiety many are searching for.

“The only rest available is in God — there is no other option,” Highfield said. “I don’t have to break down doors. God opens doors, and Jesus said His burden is light and His yoke is easy.”

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Sydney Griffith & Brandon Rudolph A LOVE BETWEEN BEST FRIENDS Story by Kiley Distelrath A romantic relationship that develops between best friends — while cliché — is the ideal storybook ending. It’s the kind of love that builds, like the bridge of a song with unexpected vocals and chords, changing the rhythm for the better.

But for seniors Sydney Griffith and Brandon Rudolph, the idea of being anything more than acquaintances was highly unlikely their freshman year, especially considering how Rudolph disliked Fleetwood Mac, one of Griffith’s favorite bands.

“Woah. He looks so weird,” Griffith said after seeing a picture of Rudolph.

Her resident advisor had just shared with her how Rudolph had commented that Griffith’s eyes were beautiful after seeing a picture of her. Griffith’s and Rudolph’s RAs were in a relationship, and Rudolph hung out in Griffith’s freshman dorm quite frequently.

Studying together in Buenos Aires a year later transformed their dynamic.

They said they became best friends while having every class together during the abroad program, but their relationship was undeniably more. When traveling around Peru and Columbia in a small group of four during travel break, Griffith said she and Rudolph were in their own world.

“You can throw your legs on top of mine to make it more comfy,” Rudolph said to Griffith on a bus during the trip.

Beginning with small nudges while walking in Peru and invitations to sit closer, the two ended up drinking coffee across from each other at a little cafe called Amor Perfecto in Columbia. It was Rudolph’s birthday, but also their first date.

“This was someone who meant a lot to me,” Griffith said. “This was going to be a really important relationship even though I was pretty oblivious to the whole romantic part at the time.”

Now two years later and back in Malibu, the couple still finds their connection as deep as before.

It’s the simplicity of their relationship — the fact that they are best friends — that defines it.

“Let’s just watch ‘Gilmore Girls’ and drink hot chocolate,” Rudolph said. “That’s what a lot of our days have become, and it somehow feels special every day we do it.”

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Photo courtesy of Sydney Griffith & Brandon Rudolph Griffith and Rudolph said their cultural identities have become their key to learning each other’s pasts and deepening their bond.

The couple most recently celebrated Griffith’s Vietnamese heritage during Vietnamese New Year.

Griffith said Rudolph shares his Mexican identity by telling her funny memories and family names.

“I feel like that’s something else that also is very fun about our relationship is getting to see those cultural backgrounds and the roles they had on our upbringing,” Rudolph said. “Because there’s definitely so many years I didn’t know Syd before I met her, so I think seeing that, you know, cultural background — how it influenced her now. It’s just good that we both get to be a part of that.”

A shared desire to learn about social issues connects them further. Griffith said it’s a personal journey, and they hold each other accountable to it.

Sharing culture, pursuing social awareness, watching “Gilmore Girls” and painting their nails together are distinctions that make Griffith and Rudolph who they are. Their love thrives with these small, intentional actions. It is seen in a “perfect day” Rudolph described — when they cooked a replica of The Cheesecake Factory’s four cheese pasta and vibed outside to “It’s Been a Long, Long Time,” just like Captain America and longtime love Peggy Carter in “Avengers: Endgame.”

rëållÿ å ë b tø g ñ ï gø ”Thïs wås thøûgh ñ ë v ë p ï h s låtïøñ ïmpørtåñt rë hole w e th to s u o oblivi y tt e r p s a Iw ë.” m tï ë th t å t r rømåñtïç på ëñïør s , th ï f f ï r G - Sÿdñëÿ

The Fallacy of

Fållïñg ïñ Løvë Story by Rowan Toke Photo by Lindsey Sullivan

Luke Dorais and Lauren Schulze

t Ï’d å th ÿ å d t ë ëxåç th , ë k ï l , øû hërë ÿ w ë l l m të ø s ñ ë d ppëñë åñ’t ëv å ç h t ÿ l ï b t å û b b ø ïllër,’ ”Ï pr M ñ ï r fåll.” f f løvë Ë ï l ç Ï ë , s th ë åftër d å ø såÿ, ’Ý r t å åløñg th ior n e s , n o tt tra S n a d r o —J In relationships, the initial attraction is like falling off a cliff.

Love is everything that follows.

Senior Jordan Stratton, who proposed to his fiancée, senior Erin Miller, in December 2019, said infatuation can “hit you upside the head.” He used the cliff metaphor to explain the initial feeling of being attracted to everything physical and emotional about a person.

“But for me, being in love is something that’s totally different — it’s like, it’s everything that’s after that, is being in love,” Stratton said.

Linda DeVillers, adjunct professor at Pepperdine’s Graduate School of Education and Psychology and licensed psychologist, said it is dismissive to think that undergraduate students only experience “puppy love.”

DeVillers said it is more accurate to say people, undergraduate students included, “grow to love,” rather than “fall in love.”

Love as growing through images Stratton and two other students defined love using images that evoked the idea of growing to love a person — an idea DeVillers said comes from German psychologist Erich Fromm.

“I didn’t really know, like the first time I met him, like, ‘Oh my gosh, this is like my person,’” junior Lauren Schulze said.

Schulze said she met her boyfriend, junior Luke Dorais, during their first year at Pepperdine. The growth of her relationship with Dorais was a process that eventually picked up speed.

“And then as I like, got to spend more and more time with him — he met my friends, he met my family — it’s like building the snow, getting into this like huge ball,

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and then it gets really rapid, like really fast,” Schulze said.

Schulze said her relationship with Dorais was fast moving, as they said “I love you” to each other rather quickly, but it did not immediately sweep her off her feet.

Their relationship and love for each other grew as their connection did.

“And you know, like we’ve only been together for over, a little over two years now, but I feel like I’ve known him forever,” Schulze said. “I’m 100% confident I’m going to marry him.”

After dating since their first year at Pepperdine, Stratton said the consistency and security of Miller always being there for him contributed to his idea of love and their journey there as a couple.

“I probably can’t even tell you, like, the exact day that I’d say, ‘Yes, I love Erin Miller,’ but it happened somewhere along that road after the cliff fall,” Stratton said. “And, it happened through, like, consistency of us, like, being that good team and, like, working together to do some cool stuff.”

Junior Morgan DeVico also conceptualized initial attraction with a metaphor similar to Stratton’s. She is engaged to Tyler Leitzel, who she has known since they were young, and they have been dating for just over a year.

“There was a very long period of just like, we’re just friends and we’re getting to know each other, you know, but like, as soon as we started dating, it definitely felt like that, like, kind of like falling off the cliff,” DeVico said. “You know, it was just like an ‘OK, this is it kind of thing, you know what I mean? Like, we just very much clicked.”

DeVico said real love doesn’t develop unless there is a basis of friendship and real experience. Because they had already es-

”Ï thïñk thåt’s whëñ ÿøû ëxpër ïëñçë løvë, bût Ï døñ’t thïñk løvë ïs få llïñg øff thë çlïff. Ï thïñk løvë ïs bëïñg ç åûght.”

— Mørgåñ D ëVïçø, jûñïør tablished a friendship, a romantic relationship flourished, and they fell in love quickly.

“The thing that I think means the most, and allows love to grow the most, is the things you do consistently, and the things you do every day,” DeVico said.

DeVico connected her perception of falling in love to her relationship with God. She said she sees God’s providence in her relationship with her fiancé, as she understands love through a different image than the other students.

“I think that’s when you experience love, but I don’t think love is falling off the cliff,” DeVico said. “I think love is being caught.”

Loving with the head and the heart The concepts of love that all three students hold align with the idea of loving with their head and heart, which DeVillers said has been called practical love. Both head and heart cause a person to consider the circumstances and implications of a relationship.

“That’s where the head comes in — that, I’m attracted, but I may need to put the brakes on here,” DeVillers said.

Kelly Haer, the director of the Relationship IQ program, acknowledged similar complexities within the idea of falling in love. She said the Relationship IQ curriculum places great importance on the value of a person’s head and heart in a relationship.

“You want both to be present,” Haer said. “You don’t want to just, you know, ‘On paper, this seems like it’s a good idea — it sounds good.’ But, are you there? Are you drawn to this person emotionally, or were you just drawn to this person emotionally or physically?”

Stratton and Schulze agreed with the importance of the head and the heart in their respective relationships. Schulze said her connection with Dorais shows her that love is about security.

“He can just read me — it’s almost like he’s psychic,” Schulze said. “He can just like read my thoughts, and we’ll say things at the exact same time. Like, we’re just, it’s on a different level.”

After dating for over two years, Schulze said love is knowing the person is always going to be here. The survival of Schulze’s relationship with Dorais while they were attending separate abroad programs showed her this, as she attended the Lausanne, Switzerland, program and he the Heidelberg, Germany, program. Even with this distance, they made sure they saw each other almost every weekend.

“When you love someone, you put in all this effort to see them, to be with them, just to continue that relationship,” Schulze said.

Stratton said he believes love is a commitment to grow with a person.

“One of the things that we’ve kind of established as kind of like a motto is like, we’re teammates, and that if our relationship isn’t growing, or if we aren’t growing as people, then our relationship is dying,” Stratton said.

As DeVillers explained, this emphasis on growth in a relationship, whether it be growing to love or growing as people, is necessary to fully understand love.

Stratton and Miller demonstrate this, as he said they are probably the longest-standing couple from New Student Orientation in their class. As they have grown in their relationship and as people, their love has blossomed, leading them to schedule their wedding for May 8.

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Avenue of Acceptance: How Mental Health & Faith Intertwine Story by Ali Levens

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Photos by Anastasia Condolon

Mental illness is never a path someone would choose.

But for five Pepperdine students, it’s an avenue that has led them on a winding journey as they wrestle with their diagnoses, healing and faith.

These three may never fully converge, but all five students have come to terms with their diagnoses and found meaning and mending.

“I don’t think we as people are meant to know all the answers, and that’s OK,” junior Alicia Yu said. “At the same time, God has given me a lot of peace through it all, and I think that because of that, I can still say, ‘Yes, I struggle a lot with my mental health, but that doesn’t mean that God doesn’t love me,’ or that I’m pushed to the back.”

This kind of wrestling is apparent across all five students from their initial feelings surrounding their diagnoses, their healing processes and how faith intersects with their everyday lives.

Diagnoses

Miranda Hall

Riddled with overwhelming perfectionism and struggling with time management, senior Miranda Hall said she felt anxiety when completing assignments and struggled to stay engaged in class.

Hall took to the internet to find answers about her academic disengagement and found an article about teens with perfectionist tendencies getting late Attention Deficit Disorder diagnoses. It resonated with her. Although she was sure she had ADD, the psychiatrist disagreed when she went for her first diagnosis at age 15.

“That was really disappointing because I had put everything on to that diagnosis,” Hall said. “I was like, ‘This is what I need, this will fix my life.’”

After making it through her junior year by the skin of her teeth, Hall pleaded with her mother to get another test. It was only three weeks into seeing a psychologist that she was diagnosed with inattentive ADHD. “It was one of the best moments in my life, getting that diagnosis,” Hall said.

“It was just really great to have an explanation for why I struggled in classes, so much the way that I did, and that it wasn’t anything wrong with me, and I wasn’t lazy.”

Before eighth grade, first-year Johnathan Flint believed he did not fit into the stereotypes of a person with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, like maintaining a clean room and having hyper-organization. The snowball of tendencies and intrusive thoughts began when he reached high school.

“I would be like, ‘If I don’t pick up this piece of trash, if I don’t step on this crack, if I don’t feel good, if I don’t rewrite on the paper, then I’ll do terrible at the next race, then I’ll fail this test, I will lose all my friends,’” Flint said.

Flint’s OCD escalated when he began driving his sophomore year; he was now able to turn around his vehicle if a tendency struck.

He recalled a time that year where he sat in his car for 30 minutes trying to decide whether to step on a crack he missed or to go home. He mentally wrestled with himself and even turned around while on his way home.

Flint said a psychiatrist diagnosed him with OCD in

2018 and put him on medication. Sometimes, Flint’s tendencies signal that his success is not dependent on his work but on completing his rituals. His tendencies fluctuate — appearing when his life is “really good” and dissipating when he has “nothing to lose.”

Junior Everett Boudrieau said he felt isolated without consistent human contact while at home in Colorado last semester. He began seeing a therapist over Zoom in September 2020. The therapist said he had symptoms of anxiety or depression and consequently diagnosed him with Adjustment Disorder and mild anxiety.

“I just wasn’t even myself last semester because I was thinking completely irrationally and experiencing emotions I’d never [experienced],” Boudrieau said.

In what his therapist deemed “the thought loop from hell,” Boudrieau fell into a constant “spiral” of thinking about unanswered existential questions.

Boudrieau recalled the beginning of the spiral — a weeklong panic attack — that left him in a damaging mental space.

“I would get into this cycle where I couldn’t hear anybody,” Boudrieau said.

“I was completely in my head, which is just so scary because then you’re just not in the moment at all. That’s what I was being taught, that I was supposed to do all throughout sophomore year — be present, be in the moment — but it kind of sucked that I was losing the understanding [of] what that even meant anymore.”

Junior Lauren Drake said a psychiatrist diagnosed her with Bipolar Disorder that includes forms of depression and anxiety in

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October 2019. She said her Bipolar diagnosis was scary, yet affirming, and provided clarity.

“I feel like there’s a preconceived notion of what Bipolar Disorder is,” Drake said, “and I feel like I’ve learned now that it’s very much a spectrum.”

Drake said she had mild anxiety in high school, but it became amplified after the 2018 shooting at Borderline that claimed the life of her roommate Alaina Housley.

After returning to her home in Washington in early November 2018 following the Woolsey Fire evacuation, Drake received counseling multiple times a week to process the grief and trauma she experienced.

While faced with Bipolar Disorder, Drake said her emotions are heightened when she goes into “depressive episodes.” When her mood is regulated, she is able to complete all tasks, but a bad day may include a lack of motivation.

“I was feeling really lonely and it was a lot of crying all the time and feeling empty and pushing people away and feeling really low and self-deprecating,” Drake said.

“I haven’t been at the point of feeling suicidal since 2018.”

Yu said a neuropsychologist diagnosed her with Major Depressive Disorder and Specified Anxiety Disorder with panic attacks during her sophomore year of high school and inattentive ADHD this year, which she described as “freeing.” Yu said her Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder is undiagnosed, but every professional claimed it was evident.

“I’m really comfortable with knowing that these are things that I deal with,” Yu said. “It’s just another thing about me.”

During online school, Yu’s mental illness has looked different than years prior. Her depression has caused feelings of gloominess and being withdrawn, her anxiety extends from needing security to having physical panic attacks and her PTSD occurs when loud and sudden noises trigger her.

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start u o y , m o tt o b e eally at th r e ’r u o y n e h “W së før ø p r û p ø ñ ’s ë r ë thïñg; th ø ñ ’s ë r ë th ë k lï l tø fëë nd like fi d n a y tr to e v just ha u o y d n a , g n i th y an eling fe u o y ts e g st a just at le t a th s g n i th o tw one or n body.“ w o r u o y n i th i something w au, junior e i r d u o B tt e r e — Ev Faith and mental illness Yu began to turn to Christ in eighth grade, a year she described as difficult for herself and her best friend.

“A lot of my faith has been rooted in my mental health journey,” Yu said. “At the same time, I struggled a lot with wondering how my faith fits in dealing with the aftermath of Borderline.”

Unlike Yu, Drake’s Christian faith dissipated after the loss, and she has been unable to reconnect with God. “I was like, ‘I’m done. I don’t, I can’t reconcile this,’” Drake said.

Drake said her absence from God will not be permanent, but she is taking her time before attempting to find answers to her many questions.

“I’m not there yet, but I think that’s OK,” Drake said. “It’s not because I’m angry ... but I’m hurt. I have so many questions that I am not ready to tackle yet.”

In a similar turn of events, Boudrieau threw in the towel on Christianity after thinking through a cycle of unanswered questions about God’s existence in October 2020.

“That’s what happens when you’re in your head all the time, and you’re just only getting more confused because you want answers,” Boudrieau said. “You search in the Bible for answers,

and they’re going to give you parables.”

In January, Boudrieau moved back to the Malibu area and said his mental health and connection with God has immensely improved. He said he prays daily and surrounds himself with the church and community.

Much like Boudrieau, Hall questioned why God made her this way and why she was withheld from her diagnosis for so long, but she then saw the value in His timing and garnered a greater appreciation for it.

“I went through years of what I would describe as hell because of [my undiagnosed ADHD],” Hall said. “That was really difficult for me. Since then, I’ve been able to see how having that experience of going through extreme hardship in school and life has given me so much greater appreciation for what I have now and my ability to focus now, my ability to learn.”

Flint said his OCD and faith have become intertwined and chalks up his desire to not fulfill his OCD tendencies to his strong relationship with God. “[My OCD has] become a lot better to deal with, and I like to think that’s because of the process that I went through to work with [my faith],” Flint said.

He recalled God’s first commandment to not have any gods other than Him and viewed his OCD as a religious idol. In contrast, he also believed God may have pushed him to do the ten-

dencies and wanted to avoid angering Him. Stacy Lee Gobir, Health, Wellness, and Resilience Education program coordinator and Student Wellness Advisory Board supervisor, said she has spoken with many students who are upset in their faith journey because their mental illnesses have gotten in the way.

“I think that’s the beauty of faith — that it allows us the range of emotions,” Lee Gobir said. “God wants to meet you where you’re at and wants to hear exactly what you are going through.”

Whether faith provides hope or is a roadblock, staff counselors Sparkle Greenhaw and Gloria Walters said there is a varying level of faith among students who pursue counseling.

“As a Christian and as a counselor, I see each individual person as a creation from God and hope that they will find the hope and support that they need in Him,” Greenhaw said.

Greenhaw said she believes everyone is on their own journey and does not use black-and-white labels to complicate where people are at on those paths.

Healing and recovery Lee Gobir, Greenhaw and Walters all agree they have been able to understand and adapt to the role their mental illnesses play in their professional lives as well as in the students they mentor.

“In order to begin healing, you have to address how you really feel about whatever is going on in your life and to name it,” Lee Gobir said.

Following her ADHD diagnosis, Hall’s psychologist referred her to a psychiatrist, who put her on a full dose of medication before her first day of senior year — a day she said she would “never forget.”

“It was the most out-of-thisworld experience going to school and being able to sit in my classes,” Hall said. “I didn’t know that

my inability to pay attention had been so heavily, it was so much of a result of my ADD, and not just me being lazy or distracted. After that day, I had so much hope.”

Flint said he began medicating for about a year but was able to cease taking it. Even though he is managing his tendencies, he doubts they will ever fully disappear. After seeking a few counseling sessions, Flint’s psychiatrist taught him coping and diverging strategies. “[OCD] hasn’t hindered my life,” Flint said. “If the urges aren’t going to go away, I might as well figure out a way to at least make them not as bad.”

With a great amount of consistent support since November 2018 from counselors, family and the Pepperdine community, Drake has come to terms with her mental illness. “[Bipolar Disorder] is a part of me, and it’s definitely a part of who I am,” Drake said. “But at the same time, it doesn’t define me by any means, and I’m more than that.”

Throughout her battles with her mental illnesses, Yu said she has gained more of an understanding for people going through different situations.

“It’s helped me to understand that there are other things like everyone goes through, things that we don’t see,” Yu said. “A lot of times when we go through conflicts with other people, it’s really easy to think about our perspective and not really think, ‘Maybe they acted out because of something else going on in their life.’”

After being in solitude for months, Boudrieau said he can openly talk about his mental illness struggles. He attributes this growth to his community and now feels more “in tune” with his senses.

“I may have all these experiences because it’s so much different than being in your head,” Boudrieau said. “When you get so scared of being in your own head

it’s like, I don’t ever want to be in my head anymore — I just want to go outside; I want to do a bunch of things.”

Boudrieau has taken up cooking, upgrading from reheating frozen food to defrosting meats and planning out meals. Cooking, Boudrieau said, activates all five senses.

“When you’re really at the bottom, you start to feel like there’s nothing; there’s no purpose for anything, and you just have to try and find like one or two things that just at least gets you feeling something within your own body,” Boudrieau said. “What I’ve realized is how special it is to be able to try different foods because there’s so many different types of foods.”

Greenhaw said she wants people to be understanding of their current situations and attempt to stay connected with others. “[Keep] finding ways to remind ourselves that we are alive and present and how to be in the moment and how to continue to celebrate things as they come along,” Greenhaw said.

Walters believes people can heal from mental illness if they seek consistent treatment and put trust in their faith to guide them through the healing process.

“When you put in the work, it actually, there’s a thing that happens as a result of the suffering that comes from mental illness that makes you stronger and it makes you more compassionate,” Walters said, “and all of these things that people don’t always know because they feel like it’s just a problem that needs to be fixed.”

MENTAL HEALTH RESOURCES Pepperdine Counseling Center Student Wellness Advisory Board Online programs Waves of Wellness Sanvello Crisis Line - 310.506.4210 Suicide Hotline - 800.273.8255

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Bridging the Gap Between

Climate Migration and Christianity Story by Ivy Moore and Jolie Lowe Photos by Lindsey Sullivan Photo illustrations by Isabella Teague Growing up on the Tennessee River, senior Scottie Sandlin would watch birds migrate each year. She saw their journey as something beautiful because God created them to find all the resources they need by moving from one location to another.

It wasn’t until Sandlin, Green Team president and Sustainability minor, took a class on climate migration in January 2020 that she began to wrestle with the idea that migration could be a natural pattern for humans too.

“When I thought about human migration, I thought about the negative implications,” she said. “[The class] allowed me to think about the truth of what is going on and how migration is occurring around us, not through a political or societal lens, but how God created us to be.”

Forced displacement due to climate change, also known as climate migration, is just beginning to touch coastal areas of the United States. Climate experts, however, are seeing that climate change is already exacerbating displacement in areas with pre-existing conflict, war or other factors that lead people to flee.

As climate change continues to worsen and the number of people forced to migrate increases, Sandlin said both the wider Christian community and the Pepperdine community will have to evaluate their personal responsibility to serve those in need.

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Climate change and human migration People and places contributing the least to carbon emissions and fossil fuel production often feel the effects of climate change most intensely.

“A high standard of living [in the United States and Europe] is very carbon intensive, which has caused ripple effects and consequences that affect the most vulnerable,” said Chris Doran, Religion professor and director of the Sustainability program.

As a result of this ripple effect, people are moving. It is largely debated whether climate change is the direct cause of human displacement or rather a factor that further destabilizes areas already experiencing tension. Regardless, Doran said he believes this migration pattern is unique.

“That’s what I’m trying to get across to people when talking about climate migration,” Doran said.

“Why are there hundreds of millions of people on the move in a way that we’ve never seen before in human history?”

A tiny island off of the western coast of Alaska is one place in the U.S. feeling the effects of a changing climate. Kivalina sits in the Northwest Arctic Borough of Alaska and is home to less than 400 people, according to an Atlantic profile. An eroding coastline and rising sea levels threaten the indigenous community that relies heavily on hunting and fishing.

Other U.S. areas are beginning to experience frequent and dramatic weather events. Wildfires in California are occurring more often and growing more severe. Roughly 25% of the state’s population resides in areas that are classified as having extreme fire threat, according to a 2019 report from Gov. Gavin Newsom’s Strike Force.

Rising sea levels threaten coastal towns in areas like Louisiana and the Outer Banks off the coast of North Carolina, according to reporting from National Geographic and The New York Times. The California coast is rapidly losing beach fronts and dealing with infrastructure damage due to rising sea levels.

This makes climate change feel more tangible and closer to home than ever before.

Other areas of the world have been feeling the effects of a changing climate for some time. Erratic weather patterns attributed to climate change in the Dry Corridor, a region in Central America consisting of El Salvador, Guatemala, Honduras and Nicaragua, meant that in 2018, 2.2 million subsistence farmers lost some or all of their crops, according to the United Nations Food and Agriculture Organization. Up to 82% sold their farming tools to buy food. After this season, 8% reported that they would try to migrate to find better conditions. The UN predicts that this number will only increase unless adequate measures are taken to combat climate change and revitalize the Dry Corridor.

Avery Davis, Pepperdine Sustainability alum and current Duke University Theological Studies and Environmental Management master’s candidate, agreed

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with Doran. He said there is going to be a dramatic increase in migration that will force people to consider the driving forces behind displacement.

This is “particularly true around internally displaced people, so not refugees coming from Central America or from Syria or from Somalia, but people who are coming inland from the coastal plain of North Carolina because they’re tired of their house flooding four times a year or people moving into LA from the Sierra Nevadas because their house burned down in a wildfire,” Davis said.

The intersection of Christian faith and the climate Doran has been teaching at Pepperdine since 2007 and was an undergraduate and a master’s student at Pepperdine before receiving his PhD from the Graduate Theological Union in Berkeley. He has spent his entire teaching career focused on climate-related topics.

Because the story of God’s people is one of people who move, Doran said he believes that Christians should do their part to welcome migrants. Doran’s Christian identity is tied directly to his care for the environment and for climate migrants.

“God’s people [the Israelites] are a wandering group,” Doran said. “God’s people always tended to be sent somewhere or called into exile, and they have sometimes good results and sometimes they have generations of bad results.”

Doran believes that if people identified primarily with their Christian identity, rather than party affiliation or national identity, they would see past the negative image of immigration when it is politicized for economic or security reasons, as noted in a Council on Foreign Relations report. Many American Christians don’t consider the forces that push people to migrate to be their problem, Doran said.

“If someone can’t grow food in Honduras any longer, is that really someone else’s problem or is that my problem in the sense that we’re part of a bigger human family?” Doran said.

Doran suggested that Christians plant and grow seeds of empathy to create awareness. Some practical examples include actively listening to stories of migrants, creating space to host migrants in one’s own home or country, and reading stories in the Bible from the perspective of a migrant. He said the best thing people can do is stress the urgency of climate migration.

Many of Doran’s students also believe that responses to climate change and climate migrants are inextricably linked with Christianity.

“As a Christian, I think that we have a responsibility to care for God’s creation,” Sandlin said.

Sonia Shah, science journalist and author, writes in her book, “The Next Great Migration,” that migration should be embraced and celebrated as a natural response to environmental changes.

“Life is on the move, today as in the past,” Shah writes. “For centuries, we’ve suppressed the fact of the migration instinct, demonizing it as a harbinger of terror. We’ve constructed a story about our past, our bodies, and the natural world in which migration is the anomaly. It’s an illusion. And once it falls, the entire world shifts.”

A Pepperdine perspective Doran and Davis agreed that both Pepperdine and the larger evangelical community aren’t doing enough to address the only-worsening problem of climate change and the displacement of people due to climate change.

“I see it as not only the foremost human rights and social justice issue of our time, but really the foremost spiritual crisis of our time in that the climate crisis is a symptom of spiritual sickness in our society, of selfishness and greed and consumption,” Davis said. “And what I see in my faith are rituals and practices and stories that are specifically meant to train us to resist those sins.”

Doran has watched wildfires increase in severity in the time he’s been at Pepperdine, and he said he thinks this should drive Pepperdine to take the climate crisis seriously. He is often disappointed by Pepperdine’s lack of effort in supporting the Sustainability program and pursuing sustainable initiatives in ways other schools across the nation have.

“On my happy days I say, ‘Well, OK it’s nice to be on the front end of something,’” Doran said. “On my bad days it can feel very lonely to know that a lot of other schools across the country, Christian or non-Christian, know that this is a big deal and spend a lot of resources attempting to make it a big deal.”

Pepperdine has implemented sustainable practices like recycling water for landscaping, providing free electric vehicle charging, using renewable sources for 50% of the university’s electricity through the Clean Power Alliance and California Edison, and running a carpool commute program, Ricky Eldridge, director of the Center for Sustainability, wrote in an email.

“The university holistically considers and balances environmental, economic and social considerations in its sustainability practices,” Eldridge wrote.

“Ultimately, Pepperdine remains committed to acting as a responsible steward of our resources and managing them in an ethical, practical and purposeful manner consistent with our mission.”

Looking to the future While climate migration and climate change might seem like insurmountable problems to address, current Pepperdine students are trying to make an impact.

Lexi Scanlon and Ella Erwin, both Sustainability minors, are two of six Pepperdine students currently serving as fellows for Young Evangelicals for Climate Action (YECA). They are each working on projects to promote sustainability at Pepperdine that they hope will continue after they graduate.

Scanlon is starting Pepperdine’s first-ever environmentalist zine, a digital magazine compiling community-created works. Through stories and art, she said she seeks to highlight the diversity of those involved in the environmentalist movement, demonstrating that anyone can push for climate action.

“Pepperdine can really easily slip into this ideology that environmentalism looks one way or another,” Scanlon said. “There’s kind of a prototype for who you need to be, what you need to look like and how you need to do environmentalism here, which I think is really harmful to environmentalism as a whole because it’s very diverse and doesn’t look one way.”

Erwin’s passion for sustainability is based in connection and community. She is creating a mentorship program for Sustainability students, which will pair up students from different years and majors to discuss environmental issues and form a stronger community within the Sustainability program. Erwin is confident that Pepperdine students can make an impact on the climate crisis and aid climate migrants if they’re willing to reconnect to their relationship with the Earth and the people who inhabit it.

“I think the connection that we have with the planet is far from what it could be,” Erwin said. “But it’s so powerful still that it motivates me to try to repair the connection that we’ve broken as we’ve industrialized.”

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“Marry the Man Behind the Vacuum Cleaner” A GENERATIONAL LOVE STORY Story by Annabelle Childers Carrie and Andy Wall’s relationship may have formed 36 years ago, but their story begins long before the two attended Pepperdine together and even before the two were born.

Both second-generation Waves and children of couples who married while studying at Pepperdine, Carrie Giboney and Andy Wall grew up as family friends. Once the two were students in Malibu, their love built upon the history they shared. Years later, Carrie Wall is now a Teacher Education professor and Andy Wall serves as the preaching minister of the Conejo Valley Church of Christ.

“I saw a lifetime of Andy Wall,” Carrie Wall said.

“I saw his servant heart. I saw his love for God. I saw that he was a man of integrity. I saw the way he treated every single person. His life for 21 years, I admired from afar.”

Carrie’s parents, Terry and Susan Giboney, and Andy’s parents, Phil and Lois Wall, were members of a Pepperdine missions club in the 1960s. While the Giboneys moved to Japan for mission work, giving birth to Carrie there, the Walls were missionaries in Greece, where Andy spent his early childhood.

The families would see each other every year at the Yosemite Bible Encampment, a camp for Church of Christ families in Southern California. At the time, the age divide between Carrie and Andy was too large to bridge, Carrie said. Three grades apart, the two were always good friends but nothing more.

Carrie said she also saw Andy at church summer camps. Later, Carrie started at Pepperdine when Andy was beginning his senior year.

Andy said he began to take special notice of Carrie when he invited her and her friend to participate in his ‘taco ministry,’ a shared meal time at his apartment.

“Over a couple-year period I had dozens and dozens of people over for Thursday night taco ministry, and so one of the things that I noticed was Carrie was the only one who ever stayed to help with dishes or even offered,” Andy said.

Carrie said she could tell the atmosphere was changing in their relationship. Andy called Carrie during the Christmas break to ask if he could come

Photo courtesy of Andy & Carrie Wall visit her. After hanging up the phone, Carrie said she did something completely uncharacteristic.

“I left the room, I went into the living room, I stood up on the coffee table, and I said, ‘I just talked to the man I’m going to marry!’”

When Andy did visit, he asked Carrie if she would be his girlfriend. Carrie said the decision was easy.

While they knew quickly they wanted to be married, Carrie was determined to live out her college experience. Thus commenced three years of long-distance love and a semester of writing letters when Carrie studied abroad in Heidelberg, Germany.

They married shortly after she graduated, continuing what Carrie calls “a legacy of love.” Together they have three daughters — all graduates of Pepperdine — to whom Carrie gave important advice on relationships as they grew up, stemming from the lessons she learned.

“I would say things like, ‘Marry the man behind the vacuum cleaner,’” Carrie said. “Meaning pay attention to the guy who stays after the party and does the dishes, pay attention to the guy who has the servant heart, the guy who is behind the vacuum cleaner.”

øm, ø r g ïñ v lï ë th tø ïñ wëñt ”Ï lëft thë røøm, Ï ‘I just , id a s I d n a , le b coffee ta I stood up on the rry!‘” a m to g in o g ‘m I talked to the man ssor fe o r p n o ti a c u d E Teacher – Carrie Wall,

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Life After Death, Whatever That Means Story by Ashley Mowreader Art by Samantha Miller Death is an integral part of the human experience that people don’t often talk about. Pepperdine community members share their perceptions on dying, life after death and the meaning of living.

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Embrace death to truly start living.

That’s the counterintuitive take-away Sociology Professor Charles Hall leaves students with in his upper-division sociology course on death and dying.

Death isn’t the cheeriest subject, but Hall didn’t mince his words and isn’t one to shy away from difficult conversations. Hall’s class strives to break down barriers and further a deeper understanding about life and death, a traditionally taboo subject.

“It’s not a subject that we Americans like to talk about that much,” Hall said. “And yet I feel like it is probably one of the most important things that we should talk about because that is something we’re all going to face — I call it the great equalizer.”

In the Pepperdine community, discussing life and death isn’t just answering, “What happens next?”

— it goes deeper into conversations about community, faith, grief, hope and identity. Life after death defined literally and spiritually still doesn’t provide many answers, but for the faculty and students interviewed, it means finding a new perspective on living.

Life after death, literally While Hall talks about death as the route to better understand life, cultures have portrayed life and death as polar opposites for decades.

In Christianity, life and death are two separate events. In other religions like Buddhism, death is just the next stage. Unlike Eastern societies, Western society thinks of time linearly instead of cyclically, Hall said, which results in the idea of an after-life instead of reincarnation.

Throughout the U.S., most people believe in heaven and that God has created an afterlife, but there is a declining trend in people believing in hell, Hall said.

In the Christian tradition, most theologians believe in a future resurrection with the second-coming of Christ, resulting in life after death, Chaplain Sara Barton said.

“But in the meantime, because we’re not yet living in that time that is envisioned, there are all kinds of ideas about what it will be like to experience that resurrection ourselves,” Barton said. “Like, ‘What happens after we die?’ ‘Do we go to sleep?’ ‘Do we go to purgatory?’ ‘Do we experience the rapture like some novels have portrayed?’ And I don’t think anybody knows for sure.”

Even those with near-death experiences cannot predict what happens after death. Junior Austin Berg came close to death in December 2015 after a ski accident in Flagstaff, Arizona, while on a school trip.

Berg hit a tree and got sucked into a snowblower, causing him to be concussed and break both of his arms.

“Technically, I was declared dead one time, which obviously was a misdiagnosis because I’m not

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dead,” Berg said. “I don’t remember anything that happened because the first memory I have from it was waking up in a body bag, and some dude trying to find my wallet so he could ID me.”

Berg didn’t experience any kind of blinding light or other post-death experiences, which are dramatized in stories like his. Such experiences are not uncommon, Hall said.

“When stories are told about near-death experiences, the stories are pretty consistent,” Hall said.

“A tunnel, a light at the end of the tunnel, seeing someone who had already passed, being able to have a conversation, not wanting to return to the Earth.”

Research on near-death experiences, also called NDEs, still remains inconclusive, and while neuropsychological experiences can explain much of these occurrences, science can’t explain all memories of NDEs, Hall said.

“Science dominates in our culture, so there’s a lot of people who will say, ‘It’s all occurring inside the brain, inside the neurons, and this is not something that is happening truly outside,’” Hall said.

“The data is mixed — the data is not clear, and we’re unsure about that.”

Senior Connor Anthony found his own answers for what happens after death in research. Anthony grew up Roman Catholic, which defined much of his early perceptions about life after death. But after reading Dr. Rick Strassman’s research on DMT — a hallucinogenic tryptamine drug associated with psychedelics — Anthony came to a new conclusion about life after death.

“Basically, DMT isn’t just a weird drug that weird kids buy on the street,” Anthony said. “It’s a chemical that your body naturally releases in your brain, and it releases in two different events — when you’re dreaming, and when you’re about to die, your body floods your brain with DMT. There’s been hypotheses by [Strassman] especially that when you’re about to die, your body sends your mind into a dream state. It’s supposed to be some sort of self-conservation thing.”

Based on this research, Anthony said his perception of life after death is not some kind of afterlife, but rather a dream-state without a sense of time or waking up.

Dying in the personal sense But understanding death doesn’t end with comprehending what happens after death. For Berg, coming close to death changed his day-to-day perceptions.

“I think it shrunk the world for me into just people,” Berg said. “That’s what I took away from it — I should connect with people.”

Hall referenced a sociology study that asked 95-year-olds one question: ‘If you could do life all over again, what would you do differently?’ The two

Ï m å w ø H ’ såÿ, ø t ë v å h llÿ å ë r û ø Ý ” ’” ? ë f ï l ë ñ ø thïs ë v ï l ø t g gøïñ sør s ë f ø r p ÿ g çïølø ø S , l l å ës H l r å h Ç — most common answers from respondents: They wished they reflected more and wished the things they did had a lasting impact or legacy.

“I think we need to think about it and reflect on it more than we do, and in the process of doing that we realize a lot of the stressors we have today are irrelevant and small,” Hall said. “You really have to say, ‘How am I going to live this one life?’”

In Christianity, each Christian undergoes a death unto oneself in becoming a follower of Jesus. Dying to oneself, in the Christian tradition, means shedding the sinful human nature and taking on one that looks more like Jesus and owning those consequences, Barton said.

Barton pointed to a passage Paul wrote in the New Testament, 2 Corinthians 5:17, about this new kind of life: “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!”

“It is God who inaugurated the new creation through Jesus, and Jesus followers believe that — through following Jesus — they become new creations,” Barton said. “So they stop living for themselves, you can say they die to themselves, and they start to live for other people.”

A Christian himself, Berg said he would encourage people to live with the understanding that death is present and to live life in a “more realistic sense.”

“It’s sometimes just a spiritual experience to think about, if you died today, how would the people around you remember you?” Berg said. “And I just think people should want to leave a positive impact so that when you are gone, people will look back and smile.”

Looking back at his NDE, Berg said it has made him reflect on what people would have done had he died. Would the school hold a tribute? Would people move on quickly, or would they grieve and remember him fondly? These are the questions he asked himself.

Going back to school after getting out of the hospital, Berg said he was shocked at how willing people were to help him — whether it was family members taking work off to drive him to appoint-

ments, classmates carrying his books or teachers excusing him from final exams.

“I think just all of that together made me realize that interpersonal relationships seem like why I should be here,” Berg said.

While Anthony doesn’t hold the same religious perspective as Barton and Berg, he agreed that one’s impact on others is a key aspect of living.

“I think somebody only really died when you don’t really remember them or you don’t feel their impact on your life anymore,” Anthony said.

Final thoughts on death Though death is a heavy subject, those interviewed said they do not think that should halt dialogue about dying, especially among college students.

“I definitely don’t think people should stop talking about it or avoid talking about it,” Anthony said. “It’s very integral to the human experience, and it’s very divisive, like our views on it largely influenced our religions and how we feel about certain things and the way we lead our lives.”

For young people it can be especially hard to conceptualize death, Hall said, but understanding it sooner in one’s life makes it that much more critical.

“I think the earlier you realize that you have this one life and it will end — the more you internalize that — I think the better chance that you will develop priorities about what’s important in life,” Hall said.

As college students, Berg and Anthony hold different perspectives on what acknowledging death means in their lives. For Berg, it’s a greater appreciation of the present and the people he knows here.

“I would say that I died before, so I’ll do it again,” Berg said, laughing.

For Anthony, death is very real, which motivates him to create a life worth living.

“But it’s scary — I’m definitely scared of it,” Anthony said. “I think part of it is building a life that when it comes time, you’re not regretting anything, and you’re not wishing you could go back.”

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The Eternal Race Within I am on the border Of unfeeling, And I do not know How to stop myself From crossing.

I am trying with all that I can, Everything I am To not step into the empty land Of unfeeling.

But I think I am too already far gone.

In fact, I don’t even know where I am.

Being on the edge is far worse than falling Helplessly down the hill, Because at least when I have already fallen, I know where I am going; I am not floating, But actually moving Into a solidified direction.

On the edge I am chained; Torn between two polarizing states of being.

I have no choice, Though I so desperately want to control that choice.

But I simply do not — I cannot.

The choice is not mine for the making, And as the days pass, The closer my toes get to touching the dirty, crumbled line That eternity naturally marks as the finish line of reality.

I take a breath; I stop fighting, And allow myself to seamlessly fly Into vacantness.

The white ribbon splits in half.

Mia Zendejas Fields of Frost You ruined it all In your white sparkly dress Running through the forest Letting it become a mess I thought our friendship would survive Instead, it withered and it died I tried my best to replant the seeds Texting you over and over enduring the breeze I stayed out too long in the freezing cold Waiting on flowers that would not grow

olon Anastasia Cond

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When Forgiveness Shocks the World Story by Emily Morton Art by Isabella Teague Sometimes an act of offense is minor, and it takes seconds to forgive.

Other times it is incomprehensible, almost impossible to find the means to forgive.

After a white supremacist shot nine Black members of Emanuel African Methodist Episcopal Church in Charleston, South Carolina, five different family members told the gunman they forgave him, Jennifer Berry Hawes wrote in her nonfiction account “Grace Will Lead Us Home.”

“I forgive you,” Nadine Collier, daughter of victim Ethel Lance, told the shooter in the first hearing. “You took something very precious away from me. I will never talk to her ever again.

I will never be able to hold her again.

But I forgive you! And have mercy on your soul. You. Hurt. Me! You hurt a lot of people. But God forgives you. And I forgive you.”

Their ability to forgive in the face of such loss shocked the world.

For Christians, forgiveness spans from a simple “I’m sorry” to the grace they believe Jesus Christ poured out on the cross. Elizabeth Mancuso, Seaver Psychology professor, and Eric Wilson, preaching minister for the University Church of Christ, both agreed that forgiveness is complicated, messy and crucial for healing to happen. And sometimes, it requires a higher power.

Understanding types of forgiveness With how widespread forgiveness is, it is hard to define forgiveness and all of its moving parts.

“I think the most common definitions of forgiveness [are] kind of centered around the idea that there’s been some kind of transgression that’s happened,” Mancuso said. “And that forgiveness is about cancelling the debt associated with a transgression.”

Mancuso said there are two types of forgiveness — decisional and emotional.

“Decisional forgiveness is usually understood as the process where people make the decision that they want to treat the person who is the transgressor — if we want to use that term — that they want to treat that person as a valuable person, even though they’ve transgressed them,” Mancuso said.

When a person chooses to treat the person who wronged them as though they had not, they are enacting decisional forgiveness, Mancuso said. She explained that emotional forgiveness centers around the forgiver changing their thoughts about the offender.

“Starting to have more positive feelings toward the offender and cancelling out the kind of negative emotions and thoughts that the person has toward the offender,” Mancuso said.

A common misconception about forgiveness is that it leads to forgetting or condoning of behavior, Mancuso said. From a clinical and research perspective, forgiveness has a completely different goal than approving the behavior.

When choosing to forgive, one can still illustrate a sense that the action or transgression was wrong, Mancuso said. And forgiveness doesn’t always lead to reconciliation.

“I got to make a choice whether I trust them or not to really reconcile that relationship completely,” Wilson said. “But at the outset, even if I don’t go back into that relationship because of that act of violence, I can still wish them well. I will not strip them of their dignity. And I won’t do anything to get in their way of their further growth.”

One doesn’t have to forgive and forget, Wilson said, but forgiveness is necessary for healing.

“You can move on [in] separate ways and still engage in forgiveness, because what’s really important to understand is that forgiveness really is for the forgiver,” Mancuso said.

Personal experiences Mancuso sees examples of forgiveness in her own marriage.

“We might have disagreements where I often will say, ‘I’m sorry, I didn’t consider your viewpoint’ or ‘I didn’t understand what you were seeing,’” Mancuso said. “Or if it becomes emotionally straining on me, if we’re having a disagreement, and then I can say, ‘I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to get so emotionally intense’ or ‘I didn’t mean to raise my voice.’”

First-year Maddie Joe also works on forgiveness with others, especially her parents regarding her academics. She said she tries to understand where her parents are coming from, taking their crit-

icism constructively to do better academically rather than taking it as a beratement.

“And then forgiving others, forgiving your parents for being so hard on you because it is all for you,” Joe said.

Outside of forgiving others, Joe works on forgiving herself.

“I would say self-forgiveness is something that I really have to focus on the most,” Joe said.

She works on this when she doesn’t have the grades she expects or when she finds herself socially and mentally exhausted.

One of the ways Joe said she works on her self-forgiveness is looking in the mirror and saying, “You’re going to do great.”

“I think that self-forgiveness is one that we often neglect and can be the most important of all,” Joe said.

Senior Tommy Koppang uses an age-old technique when he is working on forgiveness — he said he tries to put himself in someone else’s shoes.

“Forgiveness is just understanding where someone is coming from and allowing yourself to, you know, just forgive them,” Koppang said.

Koppang said he thinks he “gets over things pretty quickly.” He puts himself in his friends’ shoes when they take their family problems out on him. This helps Koppang to understand why his friends chose to act that way.

First-year Nathaniel Lerch finds himself having to work on forgiveness for his siblings.

“Whenever they continually wrong me, specifically my siblings, they’re old enough to be able to [understand],” Lerch said. “They’re

only two years younger than me. I definitely struggle whenever they continually do things that they know are going to hurt me.”

Lerch said it is harder to turn the other cheek. He chooses to turn to God to find the power to forgive his siblings.

Turning to God Joe turns to God as well when she needs to forgive.

“I think that it’s a mentality of forgiveness,” Joe said. “A mentality to consciously be forgiving and showing grace in the moment and not after you thought about it, not after you’ve got more depth about it. You have to forgive in the moment that same way that God forgives you immediately; He doesn’t hold on to that for even a second.”

Religious coping — a form of turning to God — aims to address a stressor.

Mancuso performed a study that focused on divorced couples and their use of religious coping. Her study found that it is common for adults to turn to God in a divorce. Doing so helped the individual experience less verbal aggression with the ex-spouse, engage in less demonization of the ex-spouse and experience more positive spiritual emotions. The study also found that turning to God to forgive seemed to be most functional when it helped to resolve the hurt or offense.

Leaning on Scripture can aid an individual who is looking to God to help with forgiveness. Forgiveness requires understanding differences and what caused the hurt and then going through a process of making peace with that hurt, Wilson said.

“But it always goes back to the character of God — that seeking that sense of oneness and wholeness and completeness of individuals being in whole relationships,” Wilson said.

Forgiving in a healthy way can help someone decide where the relationship goes from the moment of offense. Wilson

said some healthy steps include seeing others as loved, divine beings, coming to terms with what forgiveness is and isn’t, going to God for the healing process to begin and being far enough into the healing process to go to the other person and forgive them.

“Then when I — we’ve had that moment of forgiveness — then we determine whether we can move into reconciliation,” Wilson said.

Forgiveness in times of crisis In the Emanuel Nine case, family members said they did not plan to even speak at the initial plea hearing, but they felt God’s spirit move them to offer forgiveness, Hawes wrote.

Black and Brown communities have been dealing with the pains of marginalization and oppression for some time, Wilson said. They seek strength from their communities and understand forgiveness is linked to survival. These marginalized people understand the importance of love, forgiveness and how resentment in the heart is destructive to them.

“I would imagine that those people are so immersed in the story of God,” Wilson said. “And so immersed in this understanding of the power of forgiveness that they look upon the person that caused this more with pity than anger, and through their relationship with God, they had the power to offer forgiveness.”

The families forgave because they believed Scripture requires it, Hawes wrote.

They forgave to heal, not to reconcile with the person who caused them hurt.

Mancuso expressed that forgiveness is for the forgiver, and Wilson made the same point. But this level of forgiveness is very rare — forgiveness when something so close and dear has been stripped away.

“Unless you are an empowered person, their level of forgiveness is almost impossible,” Wilson said. “Impossible.”

Madison Menefee Owns Her Faith Story by Sarah Johnson People need church like they need water.

That is how Pepperdine senior Biology major Madison Menefee was raised to view her faith.

“Church is my favorite place in the world,” Menefee said.

Madison has been attending a nondenominational church in Orange County with her close-knit family since she was a newborn. While she felt lucky to have a firm foundation in the church, it was important to her that she was choosing this path for herself, Menefee said.

“I always loved God and my church community,” Menefee said. “But there comes a point where you have to separate yourself from your parents and ask yourself, ‘What do I believe?’”

For Menefee, this process began in high school and followed her to college, when she said she experienced crippling anxiety.

Like many students, Menefee found herself in the vulnerable position of attempting to find a new home in an unfamiliar place as a first-year student in college.

“You’re alone your first year,” Menefee said. “I had no parents, no friends really. I really only had God.” Throughout this year her relationship with God grew more than she could have imagined. At first, she was solely seeking Him to help her get through the day due to her severe anxiety, but as her anxiety faded, Menefee said her relationship with God remained strong.

“That time taught me what it really means to rely on the Lord every day for everything,” Menefee said.

Since the hard times she faced in her early college career, Menefee said her reliance on God has not gone away.

“There are definitely times when I feel God is distant, but that is usually when I haven’t made time to read the Word, and I am rushing,” Menefee said.

When Menefee feels isolated from God, she said she reminds herself that He is always consistent even when she is inconsistent.

Menefee credits her parents for her openness and security in her faith today.

“They didn’t hide anything from me,” Menefee said. “It taught me to be vulnerable in myself and tell any struggle.”

Even during a period of doubt, she has found strength in God. “I felt really comfortable talking about that with my mom,” Menefee said. “She has known me and saw

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Photo courtesy of Madison Menefee my relationship with the Lord, so she could remind me of all the times that He has worked in my life.”

Menefee shares this openness in her faith with her fiancé, Max Mchugh.

“We went on a date, and it was the best date I have ever been on,” Menefee said. “And the rest is history.”

Menefee said she was looking for someone who was running after God and found that person in Mchugh.

“I have never met anyone so sold out to Jesus,” Menefee said. “I get to see the ins and outs of his life and how intentionally and with integrity he lives for his faith.”

Menefee said she admires Mchugh for his faith more than anyone, and he inspires her daily, always wanting to know more and encouraging her to share what is on her mind.

“He just really gives me the space and time to share my thoughts about God,” Menefee said.

Menefee said she wants to spend the rest of her life pursuing her relationship with God while walking by her best friend’s side.

“I think that I was made for Max, and Max was made for me,” Menefee said.

ë tø v å h û ø ÿ ë r ë øïñt wh p å s ë m ø ç ë ”Thër ñd åsk å ts ñ ë r å p r û røm ÿø f lf ë s r û ø ÿ të sëpårå vë?’” ë lï ë b Ï ø d t å h ÿøûrsëlf, ’W sëñïør , ë ë f ë ñ ë M ñ – Mådïsø

Withstanding the Test of Time ALAINA TROFLER WANTS A LOVE THAT LASTS Story by Jessica Wang Senior Alaina Trofler has been taking things extremely slow with her boyfriend, Bailey Sincomb.

Trofler and Sincomb started dating seven years after they first met. They’ve been a couple for two and a half years — and this is still just the beginning of their relationship. Because they’ve been growing and learning together, Trofler said she believes this relationship is her healthiest one yet.

“He’s been with me since sophomore year, so I’ve spent all three years of college, besides freshman year, with him,” Trofler said. “He’s been a great support, and I’m excited to see where we end up.”

The two met in seventh grade, where they were in several classes together. Trofler said she knew Sincomb always had a crush on her, but she didn’t like him back then.

“It was like his group of friends that told me, ‘Oh, Bailey likes you’, and I was like Whatever,’” Trofler said.

Even in high school, Trofler said she didn’t like him. But, knowing that Sincomb liked her, Trofler gave him a chance when they went to prom together during their junior year of high school.

“I was giving him an opportunity to make this become more, and he didn’t really take the opportunity,” Trofler said. “We went and everything, but we didn’t dance together at prom. We didn’t do anything after.”

It eventually worked out for the pair when they reunited after Trofler’s first year at Pepperdine during a get-together with friends back in their hometown, Joshua Tree. Since she and Sincomb shared the same friend group, Trofler said they would still hang out together.

“I went to his house, and something clicked in me, and I was like, ‘Oh, I like you,’” Trofler said. “It was so weird.”

That summer, Trofler and her friends took a trip to Mexico, where she and Sincomb officially decided to become a couple.

Their relationship started long distance, Trofler said. During Trofler’s sophomore year, she was studying abroad thousands of miles away in Argentina, while Sincomb was at home in Joshua Tree. During Trofler’s junior year, she was in Malibu, while Sincomb — who started at-

Photo courtesy of Alaina Trofler tending a metal fabrication and welding trade school — was in Rancho Cucamonga, California. However, during the summers, Trofler and Sincomb were able to spend time together in their hometown.

Trofler said their relationship evolved in a healthy manner despite the distance between them.

Through daily conversations and open communication, they are still growing together.

Currently, Trofler lives in Calabasas and Sincomb is in North Hollywood, so the two are only a halfhour apart. After she graduates from Pepperdine this year, Trofler said she and Sincomb are planning to move in together, which is a big step in their relationship. At the moment, they aren’t yet looking at engagement.

“This whole relationship started super slow — we were friends for seven years first, and then we got together,” Trofler said. “So now it’s like, ‘Why rush things? Why rush something that you want to last forever?’”

g ñ ï th ë m ø s sh ”’Whÿ rû ver?” e r o f st a l to t n a w u o y that ør ï ñ ë s , r ë l f ø Tr å ñ ï å l Å 56

”Tø gïvë ûñtø thëm bëåûtÿ før åshës, thë øïl øf jøÿ før møûrñïñg, thë gårmëñt øf pråïsë før thë spïrït øf hëåvïñëss; thåt thëÿ mïght bë çållëd trëës øf rïghtëøûsñëss, thë plåñtïñg øf thë Lørd, thåt Hë mïght bë glørïfïëd.” Ïsåïåh 61:3

Spring 2021