Can We Talk?

A group of Honors Program students studied civility and then put to practice what they learned

Can We Talk? was a discussion that was truly like no other that I have every had with other college students. This was the first real discussion I was able to have with others close to my age and from different backgrounds where I felt I was in an environment that was safe enough for me to share my opinions as well as be able to learn from others. All ground rules set in place were effective in maintaining a productive and respectful discussion. I valued most the ground rules of listening to each other and the ability to admit you learned something new or if you were wrong. I appreciated these rules the most because that is where the conversations I have witnessed in the past have gone wrong; one does not listen to the other and egos and pride were so profound that no one could admit they were wrong. They allowed us to respectfully disagree with

Many of the political conversations that Elisabeth Dumont has witnessed during her time at Drexel have been very one-sided and volatile. These discussions often involve a lack of listening and were grounded in a goal to outwit the “opponent.”

So, Dumont, a senior nursing major from Southbury, Connecticut, was intrigued about a new class that teaches Honors students how to engage in tough conversations.

As part of that class, she also took part in Can We Talk?, a student dialogue presented by Pennoni’s Center for Civil Discourse that brought together about 130 students from Drexel and three other campuses. Now in its seventh year, the Can We Talk? initiative began in 2017 at the University of Pennsylvania.

The course helped students explore different concepts of civility and how they influence interactions in workplaces, families, online and in the work of democratic self-governance. The Honors students then got a chance to put the course concepts to work at two Can We Talk? forums held during the fall term.

On an evening last November, Bentley Hall buzzed with activity as students from Drexel, UPenn, the University of Virginia and Point Park University came together — in person and on Zoom — to talk about issues ranging from gun control to immigration to Kanye West.

— Chris Satullo, adjunct professor, journalist and media & civic engagement consultant

one another rather than have to sit politely and listen. These rules can also apply to the real world because staying quiet in certain conversations where you disagree can lead to resentment and further brewing of the issue in one’s mind.

Our most productive discussion revolved around our thoughts on gun control laws as well as the media’s role when reporting gun violence. Some members of my group believed guns, particularly military grade machine rifles should not be allowed in the hands of the public, while others believed it wasn’t necessarily the guns that were the root of the issue, but rather the people who own them. We ultimately came to the agreement that background checks should be a priority when one wants to buy a gun. This will ensure public safety as well as safe intention towards the gun’s use. Regardless of point of view, each member listened attentively to one another and was willing to hear out multiple opinions which either contributed to theirs or differed.

I would also like to point out the professionality maintained by the moderator. In addition to this, she actively listened to our statements to the prompts and guided our answers further along with questions. Although my group was able to speak fairly well with one another, our moderator did an excellent job with facilitating discussion, keeping it on topic, and asking us thoughtful questions in order for us to critically think about our statements to the prompts.

Overall, this discussion was incredibly civil and professional, and provided a safe environment for all to share their thoughts. I will definitely take everything I have learned and the conversational skills I have gained through this discussion into conversations I may have in the future.

I feel I have rarely experienced an environment outside my immediate family where my opinions are welcomed or explored for understanding, and have experienced multiple environments at Drexel where positions I agree with (or do not agree with, but nevertheless understand and have some measure of sympathy for) are held up in caricature or derision, which has made it difficult to risk sharing my opinions or raising other opinions I don’t necessarily agree with, but think are relevant to or missing from the conversation, for fear of the response (which in fairness, in absence of ever raising my opinions, could also be an exaggerated fear).

After we closed for the evening, two of the other members of our discussion group actually came up to me separately to thank me for sharing views they didn’t expect to hear and were really kind and encouraging. I left very glad to have had the opportunity to engage in productive discussion gaining better understanding of others, and helping others to understand my perspective and other perspectives not present in the room.

— Micah Quillen

One of the ground rules that I started using throughout the conversations was listening. When others are talking, I tend to focus on building my arguments rather than fully listening to them and their argument.

— Meghan Gupta

Having a moderator present was a great aspect of our conversation; I wish I could have a moderator with me for all my social interactions. Our moderator was responsible for managing a lot of the things that bring me anxiety in conversations, like filling the space when the conversations fall silent, comprehending and retaining the main points of what others say, and creating space for us to unpack difficult or misunderstood concepts. Having a moderator felt like a weight was lifted off my brain, and I think made everyone more comfortable sharing what they really thought. Having a referee of sorts meant that even if things became uncivil or uncomfortable, there was someone there to get the group back on track and avoid blaming individuals.

— Madi Rockett

Growing up outside of D.C., I have been surrounded by political conversations my whole life. Never did I think I’d be able to have one that didn’t end in frustration and anger.

— Katie Moorcones