July 2015

Inside:

Peekaboo

Montessori Friends

An Inseparable Love

Raising a Soldier

Northwest Arkansas’ Family Magazine

July 2015

the PEEKABOO family Kimberly Enderle

Editor-in-Chief editor@peekaboonwa.com (479) 957-0532

Ava. Grant. and Holden.

Jonathon Enderle

Creative Director jon@peekaboonwa.com (479) 586-3890

/

Distribution/ Circulation Joyce Whitaker Judy Evans Marcedalia Salinas Jeremy Whitaker Michelle Dodson

Peekaboo Publications, PO Box 1036, Bentonville, Arkansas 72712 Peekaboo Northwest Arkansas accepts writing contributions.

Please send inquiries to: editor@peekaboonwa.com or call (479) 586-3890 Peekaboo may not be reproduced in whole or in part without written permission from the publisher.

Views expressed herein are those of the authors and advertisers, and do not necessarily reflect the opinion of the magazine.

Peekaboo nwa W h at ’ s I n s i d e | J U LY | 2 0 1 5

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An Inseparable Love by: Andrea Lynn Scherer

22

Girl Time with Northwest Health System

24

Are you Raising a Soldier? by: Sherry Lloyd of ‘Sweet Southern Advice’

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Rituals of Life with Eva Lebens

30

Meet Arissa

32

Do You Let Your Kids Ride the Slide on Your Lap? by: Erin K. Downs

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Meet Mabrey by: Amy Bollenbacher

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A Waiting Heart by: Nuncia Hall

48

Everyone Has a Different Normal

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The Dalai Mama with Kristin Hvizda

54

Dad’sView with Ben Lacy

58

Meet the July Cover Models: True Montessori Friends

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Siloam Springs Fallen Soldier Memorial by: Frances Wilson

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Northwest Medical Center Springdale Achieves National Accreditation from the Metabolic and Bariatric Surgery Accreditation and Quality Improvement Program

Cover clothing by Matilda Jane.

Emily Young, Matilda Jane Trunk Keeper, 324 emilyy@matildajaneclothing.com (479) 531-6274 www.matildajaneclothing.com

10 July 2015

Happy 4th of July!

o n t h e c ov e r

Zenna Kennedy Scott, 5, daughter of David and Keisha Scott and Bobbie Elise Johanna Lebens, 5 daughter of Joost and Eva Lebens

Cover Photo by: EVERAFTER Portraiture everafterportraiture

from the editor

A Look Ahead: We are taking nominations for our September Hometown Hero issue! A hometown hero could be a soldier serving our country, a teacher who goes above and beyond, a doctor who went out of his or her way, a firefighter, a a police officer, an athlete... the list is long.

Nomination deadline: July 20th. Send to editor@peekaboonwa.com

Created For You Photography

As I write this, I am sitting next to Holden as he eats his pancakes and we watch Curious George. Ava and Grant are sleeping in, because it’s finally summer, and that is one of the best perks of the season! Today’s agenda includes: making pet rocks and looking for frogs! Is this the only thing on my “need-to-do list?” Of course not ---not even close!--but it is definitely my top priority.

Will I make a daily wage building a block tower with Grant, or taking Ava shopping at her favorite store? No -- especially not while shopping. Will I find worldwide acclaim spending an afternoon looking for worms, and searching out things that creep and crawl and make me squirm with the kiddos? Highly unlikely, but that is okay.

In fact, it is more than okay... it’s perfection.

Trust me when I say that I do not always see the silver lining in things. I stress about the little things, the medium-size things and the big things -- just ask Jonathon!

I won’t remember my ancient old to-do lists in ten years-but I will remember every smile collectively, and every sweet embrace, and every wiggly worm we saved after a rainstorm.

I am not saying to fill your days with a schedule that is blocked out with back-to-back happenings, play dates and extra-special appointments... Just the opposite. Embrace the day -- whether it went as you had hoped, or that it was a chaotic mess of a day, full of meltdowns and breakdowns.

Tomorrow is a new day, but remember today is the only one of its kind.

I think back to when our first born Ava was a baby, and how hard it was at the time. I remember that I just wanted it to get easier. I was overwhelmed and critical of every decision I made as a new mommy, worried that it wasn’t the right one (even which soap to use, or what music to have playing in the nursery). Now, though, I wish so much that I could go back and just relax through it, instead of

14 July 2015

cry through it. I wish I could have hugged even tighter, because I miss those days - days I had once prayed would go by quicker.

Again, in my usual way, this letter from the editor is more of a letter TO the editor, because I struggle with living in the moment and not throwing my hands in the air in defeat when things aren’t “just so.”

My new mission is not to make every day perfect, but to just appreciate that I have these priceless days with my three kids -- period.

So, these printed words will serve as a reminder to me this summer (and beyond) that when things get crazy, and frustrating, and messy, it’s okay. One day these memories are going to become a “remember when” for the kids to share with their children and my grandkids.

Like when Grant throws a cup of water into the trash can 2, 5, or 15 times before I can stop him, I am going to take a mental picture of it to laugh at later and remember.

Will he get in trouble? Yes, but it will remind me that, good or bad, they are little people finding their way, and I want to appreciate that I get to be a part of that as their guide.

Happy July, and happy summer!

An Inseperable Love

by: Andrea Lynn Scherer

W

hen I was 24 years old, I was living in Baltimore, Maryland.

I’d lived on the northern side of Baltimore since 2002--which, if you know anything about the area, isn’t really the safest place to live.

But, I was in my mid-twenties, had some nice neighbors, lived in a quiet neighborhood, and was making it. Things seemed to be settling into a nice routine. However, in 2007, I was involved in a car accident where someone pulled out and smashed into the rear passenger side of my car.

Even though I didn’t suffer any injuries, my car was no longer drive-able, and I certainly felt as if something scary had happened to me.

After the car accident, I started thinking about getting a tattoo. I’m not sure why I felt the need--maybe a brush with something shocking like that motivated me--but I was definitely itching for another. I remembered a friend of mine had told me about an awesome place she had gone to that had amazing tattoo artists, so a group of my friends and I got together and we all went there...and that’s where I met Dan Thompson. I showed him the tattoo I wanted, we talked for a little bit, and then we set up a time for me to come in.

I came back two days later and got my tattoo.

After we left the parlor, my friends, Dan, and

16 July 2015

I all went to a local watering hole, ate dinner, and played pool.

We really seemed to hit it off--listening to great music and just having an all-around good time. When it was time to leave, Dan walked me to my car, kissed me goodnight, and, before I could get home, he had already called! I figured, why not give him a chance?

I pretty much thought we’d just have some fun, and never expected anything to come of it, but, before I knew what was happening, we were actually dating!

In March of 2008, though, I became pregnant unexpectedly. I wasn’t sure I was ready to be a mother, but Dan was over-the-moon thrilled and told absolutely everyone he came

in contact with. His happiness over the pregnancy rubbed off on me and, though I wasn’t sure I was ready, I couldn’t help but be excited, too. We were sure I was having a girl, so we decided on the name Danica Lynn. Everything and everyone was happy, and things were falling into place, panning out like we wanted. My future was looking like it was going to be a happily-ever-after... but as it turned out, that was far from the case.

July 19, 2008 was like any other day. Dan and I headed to the tattoo shop that he now owned, to our mutual pride, so he could start work. He tattooed all afternoon and into the night. The last tattoo of the day was an eagle with an American flag, and that would end up being the last tattoo he ever did. We left the shop close to sunrise on July 20th. He went to hang out with his friends, and I went home. I called him before I laid down to get some rest, telling him when he got back we should go get pancakes. My pregnancy cravings were getting the best of me, after all, and he knew it. He replied that pancakes sounded good and agreed we could go get some when he got back. Then, we hung up...and those were the last words we ever spoke to each other.

After sleeping for a bit, I woke up and waited to hear from him. He hadn’t made it home. 10AM passed, then noon, 2PM, and still, I heard nothing. I could not get in touch with him or any of the friends I knew he was with. I called everyone I could think of, and no one else could reach him either. In the late afternoon, between 4 and 5PM, while I was talking with his ex-wife to see if maybe she had heard something, someone came to her door.

It was a Baltimore County Police Officer.

She told me she would call me right back, and those short minutes I waited seemed to take forever. I was extremely worried, so I called some friends. They came over just as the police officer showed up at my house. He informed me they had found Dan, and he was dead of an apparent heart attack. Later, I would discover his heart had stopped, and his friends had tried to call for help, but it was too late. He passed

Turn the page ...

away in his sleep. At any rate, the officer said he was so sorry, and, just like in the movies, I dropped to my knees and cried.

I don’t remember much of the following weeks-I just remember feeling numb to the situation.

My whole life felt like it had ended in just a few hours. I could not believe that, at 25, I was having to attend the funeral of my unborn child’s father.

My child would have to grow up not ever meeting or knowing his father. “How is this fair?” I thought to myself. “How could I possibly know I would be a good mother?

What if I don’t love this child? How could I raise a child on my own?

What was I going to do?” If it wasn’t for my friend Kelly, I might have given up entirely. She told me something I have never forgotten and have since used to counsel others. What she told me was very simple: that I would be an amazing mother, and I would take great care of this child because that is the type of person I am. Once the baby is born, she said, I will take one look at its face, and everything will just fall into place. She said soon it will all make sense, and I would feel that inseparable love.

I found out a few days after Dan’s passing we were having a boy, not a girl after all, and I cried all over again. After all, we hadn’t picked out names for a little boy, and I wondered what on earth I was going to name the baby without him. Luckily, my father and stepmom came up with the idea to use Dan’s last name as our son’s first name, and I just fell in love with the idea. Additionally, as I am a huge fan of Elvis, some friends and I decided it would only be fitting to give him a middle name representative of The King! Thompson Presley was born on December 28, 2008. My father and several of mine and Dan’s friends were there with me when Thompson was born.

After much thought about my living situation and with much consideration of the finances needed to be a single mother, I decided it would be in our best interest if we moved to Arkansas to be closer to my dad and stepmom.

So, in April of 2009, we packed a truck and moved to Gentry, Arkansas. Everything I had of Dan’s I put into scrapbooks for Thompson.

The hardest part of all of this is trying to explain to my son why he does not have a father.

I cannot imagine how hard it is for him, having to miss someone he never got to meet or have the chance to build memories with.

I even used some of his shirts to make a quilt for him. To this day, there is a poster board of beautiful pictures hanging above Thompson’s bed. I have done everything I can to make sure Thompson knows his father would be here for him if he could. One Valentine’s Day, Thompson’s preschool teacher--incidentally, one of my best friends--bought a balloon for me and, at Thompson’s insistence, one for his father. We took the balloon outside, tied a card to it that Thompson had made and sent it to Heaven. It had been a very long time since I’d cried that hard, and it ended up being one of the best ideas that had been given to us. Now, Thompson always sends his father balloons, cards, and pictures on special occasions, like holidays and his father’s birthday. Anytime Thompson is feeling sad and wants to send something to his father, he does.

The hardest part of all of this is trying to explain to my son why he does not have a father. He sees the other children at school getting picked up by their dads. He sees their dads coming for Father’s Day celebrations or coming just to have lunch with them. Thompson does not get to experience those things we all take for granted, and it breaks my heart. Anytime he asks where his daddy is, it’s like my heart is shattering into a million pieces. Then, our friend Angie gave me the sweetest idea. We simply told him his dad is in Heaven tattooing the angels. Angie explained when he was old enough to understand, I could tell him more about what “passing away” really meant, and now, at 6 years old, he seems to have more of an understanding of death than any child should ever have to experience. I cannot imagine how hard it is for him, having to miss someone he

never got to meet or have the chance to build memories with.

People often ask me how they can help. The main thing people can do is not judge others based on what limited knowledge they have of a person’s situation. A number of times when I mention I am a single mother, I get that “look.” The look of “Oh!? Where is he? Jail? Did he run off? You slept around, didn’t you?” Then, when I tell them why I am a single mother, the look on their face changes to “Oh, well, now we feel bad...” as if it mattered why, or was their business in the first place. What Thompson and I, and others in similar situations need, is a great support system, not judgment. The best help I have received has always been through having the best family and friends anyone could ever ask for...including at my places of employment! The Goddard School in Sparks, Maryland was incredibly understanding to my situation. They allowed me the time off I needed to grieve, and then welcomed me back to a full-time job without question. My current place of employment, Doodlebugs Daycare and Preschool, is also very supportive by allowing me to be off on July 20th every year. This day, while it is a day of sadness, has become mine and Thompson’s special day to be together to remember his father.

Losing a parent or a loved one, while devastating, does not mean someone’s world has to end. Every experience people go through shapes who they are. I could be sitting at home crying over my situation, but, instead, I chose to move on while keeping the memory of Dan alive. Thompson is a welladjusted 6-year-old boy. He has matured into a happy, very smart, funny, caring child with great comedic timing. He can make anyone laugh, melt anyone’s heart, and makes friends wherever he goes. He loves superheroes, soccer, and working on cars with his mom’s friend. His best friend is Emalyn, and she is 3 months younger than Thompson. They have known each other since the pack-and-play days, and they do everything together.

Thompson leaves a footprint on anyone’s heart he meets, and he has certainly left a big ol’ print on mine. I am very proud of the young man he is growing up to be and very grateful for Dan’s presence in my life.

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Learning begins with play.

Little Giggles is an indoor playground providing a safe environment fostering educative, creative play for young children.

Loved by children and enjoyable fo parents, too! r

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Last month, Northwest Health System treated women to a girls night out unlike any other

N

orthwest Health understands that most women spend the majority of their time caring for others - children, partners, parents, and friends.

That is why on June 7th, women across NWA were invited to spend an evening of pampering to remind them the importance of caring for themselves.

Guests were treated to delicious food prepared

by Theo’s chefs, desserts by Mary’s Little Sweets inspired by the peacock theme, a glam room with Accent’s Salon and Spa, shopping with Freckles and Sunshine, fun in the photobooth

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with Glasses and Mustaches, and interactive health stations including a bra fitting hosted by Dillard’s. With the understanding that laughter is pretty good medicine, guest speaker Lisa Smartt was invited to share her comedy and her inspiring words.

“The ladies who attended our first ‘Girl Time’ event told us it was a blast and we agree,” Patricia Driscoll, VP of Marketing for Northwest Health System said. “We laughed until we cried during Lisa Smartt’s fun and honest presentation and we ate and shopped and got lots of tips and hands on pampering from the companies who participated.”

Women were able to walk the red carpet, then dine and laugh with friends -both old and new.

The event also raised awareness and donations for the NWA Children’s Shelter.

Purses • T-Shirts • Picture Frames • Bulletin Boards • Flower Pots • Paint-Your-Own Pottery • Ooh La La Spa

S t udi

s

Pottery Painting, Parties, & More

Come create with us!

Summer Art Camps 2015 New Fayetteville location

Now Open!

479-268-3190 or 479-619-6085 | 5212 Village Parkway, Suite 11 | Rogers

www.imagine-art-studio.com

Are You Raising a Soldier?

by: Sherry Lloyd

I

magining what your children will be when they grow up can be exciting. As parents, we want them to grow up to be well-rounded adults and become something great…something we can be proud of and feel as if our parenting efforts were successful.

Listening to parents of young children speculate as to what they are going to be when they grow up is always amusing. Do these scenarios sound familiar? “My Johnny wants to be a doctor because he just loves science projects and helping others,” or, “I just know Susie is going to be a veterinarian because she absolutely adores animals and brings home something homeless every week,” and, “Our Michael is going to play professional soccer because he just lives for the sport.” These are all very noteworthy professions, and could potentially be very achievable for those who decide to make it a goal and actually succeed; however, the reality is that we parents really have no idea what our kids will become when they grow up.

Here is something you don’t hear very often, “Our son is going to grow up to be a combat soldier for the United States Army, serve as a volunteer for his country, and someday make huge sacrifices including risking his life to fight for our freedoms.”

So here’s a question for you…could you be raising a soldier?

On September 11, 2001, when our son Jake was 9 years old, he witnessed the falling of the twin towers on television along with millions of other Americans. I will never forget what he said to his

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Dad and I while we were watching as a family.

With his eyes still glued to the TV he said, “When I grow up, I’m going to be a Marine and fight for my country.” Of course I reacted as any protective mother and replied, “That’s really great Jake, but I bet you will decide to be something else when you grow up.” I left that comment right where he spoke it… in our living room in Cabot, Arkansas.

In March 2012, Jake informed us he was going to join the United States Army National Guard as an infantry combat soldier. And bam… just like that, the comment our 9-year-old son made 12 years earlier had come true.

How do you know if you are raising a soldier? As a parent, it is such a difficult thing to diagnose.

You see, a United States soldier is just a regular person who starts out as an ordinary child, who grows up to be an ordinary adult, who volunteers as an ordinary citizen to go on to do extraordinary things. At least that’s how this Army mom sees it.

What kind of parents does it take to raise a solider?

Because you can’t be really sure of your child’s future career choice while they are young, I think it takes patriotic parents who feel comfortable practicing patriotism at all times in order to fuel their kids’ love of country. We were always open with our kids on world issues and American values.

Here is my Sweet Southern Advice: Educate your kids in America 101.

Learning how to be patriotic doesn’t have to be boring; however, it does have to be taught. It should be fun and become a tradition within your family.

www.sweetsouthernadvice.com Teach your kids the meaning of self-discipline.

Education is key when kids are learning to make decisions for themselves. I have always told our kids that they must stand up for their freedoms and the issues in which they believe.

Respect the flag.

Teach your children to respect the flag. The American flag was designed in 1777 to represent the unity and strength of the country. Our military soldiers wear this flag on their arms to show dedication to their country, America, and it drapes the caskets of those who have sacrificed their lives when they are flown home.

Encourage patriotic leadership.

Children learn by example. Embrace teaching moments about our country’s heritage, show appreciation by thanking an American soldier when you see them in uniform, and present your kids with opportunities to show leadership within your family and among their friends.

Celebrate America.

It’s important daily to be thankful for our freedoms.

The July 4th holiday is about more than just food

and fireworks.

Teach your kids it is really about sacrifices that have been made to allow us to live free in the United States of America.

Happy Fourth of July! Spread some love of country among your family and friends.

About the author and Sweet Southern Advice Sherry Lloyd lives in the Ozark Mountains of Northwest Arkansas in a rural area near Beaver Lake.

She was born and raised in this sweet southern state and has been married almost 30 years.

Sherry has successfully raised two children, a few dogs and loves her chickens. She continues to meddle in her young adult children’s lives to help mold them into happy, healthy, productive adults, and enjoys sharing life’s experiences with others.

Rituals of Life Nice eve - nice-eve.com • Rootines - rootines.com

Eva interviews people living in NWA about their family routines and rituals. This month, Elda Scott shares her

story. Elda is one of the founders of the Amazeum that will open this month! Elda is married to Eric and they have two daughters; Sophia (12) and Amelia (6).

Meaningful life My parents were born in Mexico and immigrated to the United States--to California, to be exact--before my sister and I were born. We grew up in a Mexican household based on strong family bonds, a love for good food, God, and hard work. My dad was a farmer. He didn’t work in the winter, and I remember him preparing our lunches. He worked very long hours during the summer, though. We would come along during our summer vacation and run around on the fields filled with cotton, potatoes, tomatoes, etc. It was fun, but watching people work in 100 degrees Fahrenheit also determines your view on immigration. My mom got a chance to follow her dream and opened her first boutique when I was 12.

Keeping the girls close My sister and I are 18 months apart. My own girls differ six years in age. That’s quite a lot, but I want to keep them close.

I’m trying to find things relevant to both of them, which is harder now that they’re getting older. It’s the main reason I decided for Amelia to switch to the same school as Sophia.

The same student body will surround them, and Amelia might have the same teachers as Sophia. I’m looking forward to the carpool, the chats on the way home, and getting to cheer for the same basketball team!

Life changing events My decision to switch schools might have been impacted by my dad passing away last year. It made me realize you have to focus on the important things in life, and I’d like my girls to be together. The fact that my father died was incredibly sad, but beautiful and spiritual at the same time. It has been life-changing in general for me, too. After his death, I suddenly wanted to lead a simpler life. I put our house on the market and diminished the amount of stuff we collected. I guess I started looking for a more meaningful life, and noticed that bigger goals replaced my day-to-day structure.

Little black book I think it also was an extra encouragement for my husband to become Catholic. He has always been respectful towards my beliefs, but for him to actually convert means a lot to me. He even suggested we read the “little black book” during Lent this

year. I bought the book in Atlanta, and we read and discussed it with the family. It was a very special period; we talked with each other on a different level and bonded. Even though I think Amelia asked loads of questions to procrastinate her bedtime, I believe it brought the girls closer together as well.

Ponder life The four of us love to do things together, just like we used to do when I was young. We always watch a movie on Friday, make popcorn, and order pizza. Always the same Bariola’s pizza--it’s so good! We also share a love for the outdoors; we like riding our bikes on the trails and we all love fly-fishing. During the summertime, we almost always go to Idaho to fish for trout. Amelia got her own fishing rod this year, and we purchased a membership to the Spring Valley Anglers (in NWA). The water there is calmer than in Idaho, which is especially nice for Amelia. I’m looking forward to fishing and relaxing. We plan to bring my mom who can sit on the veranda and ponder life while being close to us.

www.peekaboonwa.com

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Meet Arissa Behind the scenes of Bentonville’s newest dance studio - High Pointe Performing Arts Studio

rowing up, I always seemed to be dancing, thinking about dancing, or watching other dancers. I loved to see older Gdancers perform with the lights of the stage shining down, and

I knew from a very young age I wanted to be under those same lights! In fact, I remember being in preschool and getting to the studio early so I could watch the “big girls” dance. Some kids would get excited to start the new school year with a brand new box of crayons or a new backpack, but my thrill came from slipping on a new pair of dance shoes. Ballet, more than any other style, was my passion. I’d watch my teacher as she demonstrated for our class, and I’d mimic her movements.

With practice, I would learn to mirror my teachers exactly and would feel excited and impatient to finally be able to execute each movement perfectly during our performances. Recitals were like Christmas to me, as I’d get to see the surprises of the costumes and be able to celebrate the year’s practices with a grand performance on the stage under those lights I loved. I will never forget performing in The Nutcracker as a little angel and being able to share the stage with the beautiful Sugar Plum Fairy will always be a special memory. As I grew older and out of those little angel shoes, I wanted to be a role model and inspire young dancers, just as the Sugar Plum Fairy had inspired me.

In that vein, my experiences in junior high and high school transformed my dream of being a professional dancer into one of being a dance instructor. I was selected as team captain for our dance team and was given the opportunity to instruct and choreograph dances, which I loved! As a sophomore in high school, I started teaching my own class at a dance studio, which was intimidating but rewarding. I learned so much about the different learning abilities of each dancer. Since everyone learns differently, I had to come up with multiple ways of teaching a single step. I went on to dance with Dance Olympus as a VIP and was given the opportunity to learn from wonderful instructors all over our nation, which inspired me even more to teach. After college, I was chosen to be a Universal Dance Association staff member, where I developed relationships with other

professionals and embraced where my dance career had led me.

The thrill of watching a child smile as they see themselves dancing in the mirror is precious, though it is just as rewarding to see a teenager, filled with self-confidence, smiling as they successfully reach their goals in dance. I want to meet each child where they are--whether it is a preschool child, much like myself that just can’t seem to stop dancing, or if it is a teen that needs an extra push to get to the level they want to be.

I truly want each child to develop to their fullest potential.

I’ve been blessed to be given the opportunity to open my own studio, in my hometown, surrounded by those who have supported me from the beginning. My assembled team of experienced and professional dance instructors all share my passion and excitement for dance.

We want each child to develop their technique in a supportive, healthy environment focused on quality and excitement...therefore, we welcome you to High Pointe Performing Arts Studio! I am

ecstatic to be able to shine a light on each dancer that walks through the door, and I look forward to providing the training and discipline needed for each child to be successful. My greatest dream is to be able to inspire our students to go on to reach their dreams–both on stage and beyond.

www.highpointedance.com

www.peekaboonwa.com

31

Do you let your kids ride the slide on your lap?

Read this story to find out why you shouldn’t!

O

By Erin K. Downs

ne of the things I like best about the warm weather is getting my kids outside. I relish the days of summer where no schedule means we can grab some snacks or a picnic lunch and head to our favorite park and playground. I love to see the smiles on their faces when we pull into the parking lot, hear their squeals of excitement, and rush to join the fun. The joys of the playground are simple and sweet! They find out how far their little bodies can go physically and how to make friends, all while breathing in fresh air and soaking up some good ‘ol vitamin D. It makes me proud to see them flourish in this environment.

Of course, it is not all that easy for parents. As much as we enjoy watching our babies have fun and challenge themselves, we have to be on constant look out for all the dangers the playground presents. I find myself thinking as we head out the door…what type of equipment does each playground have? Will both my two-yearold and five-year-old have enough to keep them busy? Is there a fence? Is it near a busy street?

What else might they get into while we are there?

Sand? Water? Rocks? It’s amazing how much goes into my calculations. Then, when we arrive, I do my best to keep track of both kids, which is not easy. One wants to swing, one climb up to the When your child tallest slide--only to is hurting, it is switch directions after awful to realize mere seconds. I look out that you actually for the normal pitfalls. caused it. It is Running too close to the more than any swings, getting “stuck” parent should on the monkey bars, and have to face. those super tall drop-offs when they climb up to go down the twisty slide. We all take these safety precautions without really over-thinking--it just comes with the territory, right? But what if there was a simple solution to a surprisingly common small child injury you hadn’t heard about? What if you, as a parent, actually could cause this injury, even when you thought you were protecting your baby from harm?

32 July 2015

A few years ago, on a beautifully warm September day, my husband and I took our then 2-year-old daughter out to the “big” park. You know, the ones with several sets of playground equipment for various ages, tons of kids, lots of screaming--basically, a child’s heaven.

We had been there many times. My daughter loved to explore the baby playground and we watched as she steadily climbed and went down slide after slide. I was only 3 months pregnant with my second, so I was especially active that day. I knew it would be sooner rather than later that I wouldn’t have the energy or flexibility to jump off the toadstools or chase her over the bouncy bridge.

It was a great day!

It was almost time to leave and as we walked past the big kids playground, I could see my daughter’s mind working…am I big enough yet to climb that staircase and go down that tall slide? So, I grabbed her hand and we headed up to this new challenge together. I knew I would be with her the whole time, so didn’t worry about her safety. We made it to the top platform with no problem and she looked down the slide then she looked up at me and I knew she was worried. Instinctively, I knew if this adventure was to be a success I would have to ride the slide with her. I got myself situated and lifted her on my lap. I held onto her tightly and we shoved off. We yelled “WEEEE!” and made it to the ground fast.

As our feet touched the ground, I was all smiles.

But something was not right with my daughter.

She started crying. She wouldn’t stand up, so I carried her over to Daddy. He held her while I took an inventory. What could have happened?

No blood, no scrapes, or bee sting. No broken bones that I could see, no swelling. Why was my baby girl so upset? We tried a couple times to set her down on her feet with no success, just lots of tears. We got her in the car and home with no clue as to what had happened.

At home, we continued to try to get her to stand or walk, but she was not having it. My husband did a quick Google search: playground slide injury. We were shocked at what we learned. We quickly called the doctor, and then took her to the immediate care. The injury she sustained by simply riding down the slide with me seems so obvious now. On our ride down the slide, her foot had become wedged between my leg and the side of the slide--at some point her foot was forced out of alignment and caused a hairline fracture to her tibia. We found all this out after a long process of several X-rays, trips to our pediatrician, and to a pediatric orthopedic surgeon. The lesson: do not let your child ride down the slide on anyone’s lap; it is much safer for your child to ride the slide by himself or herself.

Fortunately for us, my daughter was not a serious case. It was heartbreaking to see her crawling and then limping for months as she healed, but she didn’t have to wear a cast. It was a blow to my confidence as a mother…how could I have been so negligent? When your child is hurting, it is awful to realize that you actually caused it. It is more than any parent should have to face. My husband was very supportive and reassured me it could have just as easily been him that caused the injury.

He harbored no ill will towards me, which can be an additional side effect of this type of situation. In our case, because the injury was mild, my daughter recovered quickly and is now a super active 5-yearold with no lingering symptoms or memory of this incident. We were very lucky.

Now, as I visit the playgrounds our family loves, I have an awareness I did not have before this accident. I watch the slides and take note of any parent about to make the same mistake I did. I do not hesitate to pass on my experience to the parent about to joyfully ride the slide with their precious cargo. I get weird looks sometimes, but, for the most part, parents are thankful for this new insight. I would love to keep even one family from the emotional stress and physical pain this very preventable injury causes.

If you want to read more about this surprisingly common playground injury, I found these articles helpful: http://well.blogs.nytimes. com/2012/04/23/asurprising-risk-for-toddlersat-playground-slides/?_r=0 http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih. gov/pubmed/19700991 General playground safety from American Academy of Pediatrics: http://midcoastpediatricspa. com/wordpress/wp-content/ uploads/2013/04/AAP-PlaygroundSafety-handout.pdf More playground safety (mentions the parent going down the slide with child on lap): http://orthoinfo.aaos.org/topic.cfm?t opic=A00313

CALENDAR • 2015 Weekly Activities: Monday:

Rogers Public Library 10:00 AM – Monday Makers [Ages 0-12]

This is a program that combines storytime with at least one of the STEAM [Science, Technology, Engineering, Art, and Mathematics] components. A variety of activities are planned to fit tiny tots to preteens, so the whole family can enjoy this program!

Tuesday:

Kids Film Fest Malco Theater - Rogers Towne Center Tuesdays and Wednesdays

Malco KIDS Summer Film Fest is back, with $2 movies every Tuesday and Wednesday! A portion of the proceeds go to benefit local children’s hospitals. Arrive early as seating is limited. Kids snack packs (small popcorn, drink & candy) are available for $2.50.

Family Program 11am Siloam Springs Public Library

Wednesday:

Little Sprouts at Botanical Gardens of the Ozarks 9:30am & 10:15am http://bgozarks.org/learn/education-classes/little-sprouts/ Kids Film Fest Malco Theater - Rogers Towne Center Tuesdays and Wednesdays

Malco KIDS Summer Film Fest is back, with $2 movies every Tuesday and Wednesday! A portion of the proceeds go to benefit local children’s hospitals. Arrive early as seating is limited. Kids snack packs (small popcorn, drink & candy) are available for $2.50.

Thursday:

Storytime Fun - Siloam Springs Public Library 11:00 AM – 12:00 PM Preschool Program – Storytime with Ms. Laura

Friday:

Little Giggles Fridays (new!!!)

Music with Ms. Megan!!

10:30am Free with admission!!!

Singing, dance party and instrumental exploration!

Saturday:

Storytime at Barnes and Noble, Rogers and Fayetteville 11:00 AM Botanical Gardens of the Ozarks at the Cottage Children ages 7 to 11. Each class is Saturday morning from 10 a.m. to noon; Cost is $10 per child for members and $15 per child for nonmembers.

36 July 2015

Special events: Wednesday, July 1

Rodeo - Parson’s Stadium - Springdale 3pm Join us to observe a patriotic display of cowgirls, floats, bands, entertainment and candy for the kiddos at our Rodeo kick off parade, Beginning at the rodeo, and proceeding west through downtown.

Friday, July 3

Uptown Fayetteville Fireworks NWA Mall - 7pm Live music and activities the entire family will enjoy! Local favorite, Boom Kinetic, will be performing and kids can enjoy fun indoor & outdoor activities starting at 7 p.m. followed by the patriotic fireworks show presented by the Northwest Arkansas Mall at approx 9:25 PM..

Saturday, July 4

Fourth at the Field Arvest Ball Park In addition to the largest Fourth of July fireworks show in NWA, 4th at the Field will include an exhibition baseball game between two teams from the M.I.N.K Collegiate Baseball League, the Joplin Outlaws and the Nevada Griffons, which will begin at 6:35 p.m. Gates will open at 5:30 p.m. for the special event and the Naturals will have Kansas City Royals Kid Zone passes available for purchase for the 4 inflatables as well as the Kids Train, Speed Pitch, and the Bella Vista POA 5-hole Mini Golf Course open throughout the game.Fireworks Spectacular will start at approximately 9:05 pm to conclude the night.

July 4th Fireworks Spectacular at the AMP with SONA AMP - Rogers - 8pm The Symphony of Northwest Arkansas (SoNA), under the musical direction of Paul Haas, will present a concert celebrating both the beauty and grandeur of America, as well as honor those who have served in our nation’s armed forces.

This July 4th celebration will feature a concert followed by a traditional fireworks display provided by the City of Rogers.

Program to include Tchaikovsky’s “1812 Overture.”

Orchards Park Bentonville’s 4th of July Celebration Celebrate the Fourth at Orchards Park with a concert from Kaylee Rutland on stage at 7:00 PM . Following their performance the Arkansas Winds Orchestra will play a series of patrotic songs at about 8:00 PM. The largest fireworks show in NWA begins about 9:30 PM.

Library story times:

Bentonville Public Library: bentonvillelibrary.org Fayetteville Public Library: faylib.org Springdale Public Library: springdalelibrary.org Rogers Public Library: rogerspubliclibrary.org Siloam Springs Library: siloamsprings.com

Friday, July 10

Summer Family Fun Hummingbirds Crystal Bridges Stonelion Puppet Theatre will present a hands-on puppet-making workshop in our studios from 5:00 to 6:30 p.m., followed by their brand-new show, I’d Rather Be a Hummingbird, at 7:00 p.m. in the Great Hall.

Saturday, July 11

Kids Day at Siloam Springs Farmers Market Downtown Siloam Springs A bounce castle, crafts, activities, story time and live music light up the market on Kids Day at the Market each second Saturday during the market season, from 9am to noon.

Discover the Grounds » LightningBug Hunt at the Skyspace Crystal Bridges Join us for a dusk lightning-bug hunt and examination with University of Arkansas Entomologist Don Steinkraus at the Skyspace Meadow.

Kids welcome! Steinkraus will train you in the art of catching fireflies and how to safely jar them for research and observation. As an added bonus, arrive early to hear a discussion of James Turrell’s Skyspace The Way of Color, led by a Museum Guide. Meet at the Skyspace.

Sunday, July 12

Sidewalk Sundays at the Walmart Museum Downtown Bentonville Celebrate mad science! Kids of all ages can become mad scientists with an afternoon full of actives including: a chromatography butterfly craft, un-

covering rainbow paper, mad scientist hats, and Drop! Splat! Art! Drop in any time between 2 and 5 p.m.

Tuesday, July 14

Music on the Move, Drum Corps International 1801 SE J Street, Bentonville - 7 pm Drum Corps International is a non profit organization providing a life changing musical experience for students across the world. We are very excited that they have decided to hold an event in Bentonville this year and hope that with your attendance we can hold this event for years to come! This years show will be our largest show to date including 10 Drum Corps.

Saturday, July 18

Firefly Fling at the Botanical Gardens of the Ozarks 6-10pm The Summer Festival for Families returns to the Botanical Garden of the Ozarks .This year’s festival features some of Firefly‘s popular traditions as well as exciting new adventures and entertainment. New Firefly directors Dani Dingman and Jules Taylor are planning another fantastic festival.

Admission will be $7 for adults; $4 for children over 3; 3 and under free. At the gate admission will be $9 for adults; $5 for children over 3; 3 and under free.

Sunday, July 19

Sidewalk Sundays at the Walmart Museum Downtown Bentonville Hang out with your favorite princess and superhero with Once Upon a Party.

Drop in any time between 2 and 5 p.m.

July Saturday, July 25

Drop-in Artmaking Crystal Bridges Drop in between 1 and 4 p.m. to create your own thaumatrope, one of the earliest animation tools, using paper, tape, and a small stick. Choose your favorite animal from the exhibitions Jamie Wyeth or Warhol’s Nature, and bring it to life with this art-making activity. All materials are provided.

5th Annual Race For Sight Lawnmower Races 535 Lee Town Road, Pea Ridge Featuring screeching lawnmowers, semi-pro racers from Arkansas, Oklahoma, and Missouri, Children Power Wheel Races, bounce houses, vendor booths, Smokin’ Joes BBQ, family fun. Gates open at 4:30 p.m.

Races begin at 6 p.m. $5 per person, 4 years & under free

Sunday, July 26

Sidewalk Sundays at the Walmart Museum Downtown Bentonville Musical performances and education with School of Rock! Drop in any time between 2 and 5 p.m.

Friday, July 31

Rogers Cycling Festival Downtown Rogers Events for all skill levels, both for road cyclists and mountain bike enthusiasts.

All proceeds benefit great nonprofit cycling causes.

Meet

Mabrey Story by: Amy Bollenbacher Photos by: Jessica Meinardus www.meinardusphotography.com

Mabrey Claire was born on January 31st 2013 weighing in at 8lbs and 1 oz with a head full of black hair. It was a pretty smooth delivery and no complications -- or so we thought.

Our baby girl, Mabrey Claire, was born on January 31st, 2013, weighing in at a healthy 8 pounds and 1 ounce and showing off a head full of beautiful black hair. We simply gazed at her, as we felt that I had just given birth to the most beautiful thing my husband Aaron and I had ever laid eyes on.

We were so very thankful that it had been a fairly smooth delivery with no complications -- or so we thought.

The next day, Febuary 1st, 2013, we were just waking up after our first night of being parents to a precious baby girl, so excited to start our day off with the usual, super fun post-baby-delivery schedule: hospital newborn pictures, outfit changes, and all of our friends and family visiting us. Well... that was the plan anyway. Little did we know that God had an entirely different schedule in mind for us. Just as the hospital photographer came in our room, Mabrey stopped breathing and turned a dusky gray color, to our absolute horror. She quickly recovered on her own, but the nurse still wanted to get her checked out, so she took Mabrey to the NICU to check her vitals. We were left dumbfounded in their absence, and in shock. We attempted to comfort ourselves with the thought that this would be a one-time occurrence.

After this happened three different times, however, all in the span of about two hours, the nursing team decided to keep her in the NICU. It’s so hard for me to explain what I was feeling at that moment.

First off, I wasn’t sure what was even happening.

A nurse just ran down the hallway with my baby!

40 July 2015

Were they bringing her back to me? Was she still not breathing? All I could do was sit in the room and cry helplessly while my husband and family tried to make me feel better. They kept reassuring me that she was going to be okay and that God was in control, but everything felt completely out of control for me.

My husband and I finally decided to walk down to the NICU ourselves and find out what was going on with our newborn baby. When we came around the corner of the NICU, I saw her laying in a bed, a total of five nurses crowded around her and all of the machines beeping and going off. In that moment, I literally felt like I was going to pass out.

I will never forget the next words that were said to us by the neonatologist. He said, in a very calm, practiced, attempting-to-be-comforting voice that our newborn had had an intraventricular hemorrhage. Thank goodness I married a smart man, because I know I was looking at the doctor like a deer in the headlights! After he walked away, I asked Aaron to repeat everything that the doctor had just said. Intraventricular hemorrhage (IVH) of a newborn means that bleeding into the fluidfilled areas (ventricles) inside the brain begins to occur. There are four types of IVH, called “grades”

based on the degree of bleeding. Of course, Mabrey had one of the highest grades. It is very rare that IVH happens in full-term babies, but our baby would be the rarest of the rare! She is kind, smart, and beautiful... but, I’m getting ahead of myself.

My first thought was, honestly, that she was going to die. I was thinking that any sentence relating to my daughter that included the term “brain bleed” could not be good. We were told that, since Mabrey was an infant, her brain was different than an adult’s brain, which meant that she would actually be, in all likelihood, okay. She might suffer some long term effects, but she would probably survive.

All I could process when they told us that was that she was going to live! I can see this moment in my head very clearly, as if it just happened--I am not sure that I will ever forget a single detail of any of it. This incident happened on a Friday afternoon, a time when, normally, certain machines aren’t waiting in the NICU to be used, and doctors that are contacted out-of-state normally don’t answer their phones. However, God had his hand on us again, and the machines and the doctors were in the right place for us.

After several more tests came back, it was determined that Mabrey had a few other things going on as well. She had apnea caused by the brain bleed, which meant that she was not having any

seizure activity. These problems meant, however, that we would be spending the next 21 days in the NICU. Three whole weeks! I myself was discharged from the hospital, and Aaron and I were able to stay close to the hospital, with family. I know from personal experience that there are families that stay in the NICU much longer than that, and who experience much more severe outcomes than us, but any trip to the NICU is a harsh, sad reality. After all, we had planned to take our healthy, beautiful baby home after two short days--we weren’t really considering any other outcome other than blissful contentment with our new family.

With that being said, as you can imagine, on that 21st day I cried like a baby when we were finally able to go home. Not only was I completely overwhelmed with happiness that she would definitely be all right, but I was actually going to miss the NICU! We had become a part of what felt like a real, loving family during our stay there. I will never be able to thank the nurses and doctors that took care of us while we were there enough. We trusted them with the life of our baby girl, and developed relationships with them that we still have today. All I can say to them is thank you, and it still doesn’t seem like enough.

Aaron and I spent very long hours in the NICU with the staff, sometimes very late into the night.

I will never forget one particular night, when we

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were beyond exhausted. We left to go home and eat dinner, and, when we got back in the car to return for Mabrey’s night time feeding, we felt like our bodies were made of lead, we were so tired.

We only made it a few miles down the road before we decided that, instead of going all the way to the hospital, we would call the NICU and, if we knew the night nurse who had Mabrey on their shift, we would stay home and get some rest. Of course, a nurse that we knew, trusted and loved answering the phone! She assured us that Mabrey would be getting a warm blanket and lots of snuggles, so we turned around and went home to get real sleep--sleep that we truly needed to keep going. These are the types of relationships that we About Evan’s Project: developed in the NICU-real, trusting, and personal Evan’s Project, Inc. is a 501(c)3 charitable relationships. What’s more, organization that provides the gift of the nurses that helped just treasured memories for families dealing sent Mabrey a card in the with the overwhelming stress of having a mail last month, a little over critically ill infant in the Neonatal Intensive two years later, just because Care Unit. For many families, this means they know she loves getting quality photos of their infant’s earliest days. mail!

In the most tragic circumstances, the photos

Mabrey, and that we were going to be able to capture ourselves in that moment.

Someday, we would be able to look back and share with her the journey that she has been on. I cannot say enough how thankful I am for Evan’s Project and what they provided for our family.

While any trip to the NICU may be the only tangible keepsake of the is a difficult one, this story angel they’ve lost. For more information is absolutely full of happy visit www.evansproject.org moments. In fact, we had Evan’s Project has a fundraiser coming been in the NICU for just up and are looking for volunteers to help. a few days when one of Each volunteer raises $500 for Evan’s Mabrey Claire just the happiest moments Project in private or corporate donations turned two years old this for me took place. I love and as a reward, they get to skydive January. She developed pictures, and I love babies, for free and get a free video. Their next hydrocephalus when she so, of course, I was over planned jump is on October 17th. was six months old, and the moon to take my brand had a shunt placement new, squishy little newborn procedure.

She goes to therapy for pictures after we left the hospital. Well, that did not look like three times a week to catch up it would be happening after we were told that we would be there on all of the milestones that for 21 days, which broke my heart a little. Mabrey would already be nearly a month old by the time we left and could take pictures, she missed early on, and she is doing fabulous! If you saw her which is a very long time in “baby days!” out and about, you would never Then, through that NICU door, walked a face that I knew, who know one thing was wrong with just so happened to be a very talented photographer! She was even her. We were recently told that, holding a camera in her hand! This was the very same photographer unless unexpected complications who had taken Aaron’s and my picture after we were married. She occur, we do not have to report just looked at me and said, “Are you signed up for pictures?” I to Arkansas Children’s Hospital wasn’t signed up, and I didn’t have a clue what was going on, but she for any appointments for two handed me a form and told me that she was there in the hospital whole years! Mabrey is a fighter with Evan’s Project, which meant that I could get newborn pictures and a champion, and we could if I would like. Ya’ll, this was not be more proud of her. We seriously one of the happiest are giving God all of the glory. moments for me while being Mabrey is our only child, and in the NICU! I am not sure she has opened our eyes to see what to even compare it to. I the miraculous works of God, suppose that I could compare teaching our hearts how to truly it to how happy Aaron was love. This story is full of ups when the Cardinals won the and downs, and sad and happy World Series. I was so ecstatic moments but, ultimately, it is a that I was actually going to get story of God’s goodness and love newborn pictures of my sweet for us.

M

A Waiting Heart

y husband Dion and I met while living in Florida in the summer of 2010. I was immediately drawn to him, as he was funny, yet serious at the same time, and carried himself in such a dignified way. I had never met a man like him before, and we hit it off immediately. We spent a lot of time getting to know each other and planning for our future...so much so, that by the time Dion and I married in August of 2012, we already had our baby names picked out! I was so excited for my husband to become the father to my children.

After getting married, we relocated to Bentonville, AR, where Dion works as a project manager at Crossland Construction while I work at Mercy Hospital and will be graduating nursing school in December. Unfortunately, shortly after moving I was diagnosed with Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome, which is a common hormonal condition in which women produce a surplus of androgens. This causes irregular ovulation, or even a lack of ovulation. We quickly learned, and learned the hard way, that not all families are made the same way. We tried all sorts of things to become pregnant, but, after two years of monthly fertility treatments and five failed IUIs--all of which was emotionally and physically exhausting--we finally accepted what was in front of us and explored other options for kids. Honestly, after all we’d been through, the moment we decided to “give up” on becoming pregnant and fully pursue open adoption to become parents felt like a huge relief!

I’d like to explain a little about the process for those of you who don’t know much about open adoption. After completing our home study, we

44 July 2015

by: Nuncia Hall

designed a profile and joined an agency to show our profile to expectant mothers. Women who see our profile (and the profiles of many other great families) are able to talk to and get to know us so they can decide if they would like us to be the parents of their child. We share information and remain in contact throughout the child’s life, which enables that child to know his/her birth family and the entire story of their adoption. We, as adoptive, but open and accepting parents, can be an alternative choice for a woman struggling with the idea of parenting a child alone or is in a difficult situation.

We started the adoption process mentioned above in March of 2014, and, though the paperwork was daunting, we were super excited!

After several months of working and waiting, our profile finally became “live” and we were chosen by and matched with an expectant mother after two short months! We talked on the phone for several weeks, and then made a trip to Atlanta to attend an ultrasound appointment for the baby and get to spend some time with our expectant mom. We returned to Atlanta a month later for another appointment, and we all found out we were expecting a baby girl! We were so excited we were going to be parents and had so much fun preparing a nursery for who--we thought-was going to finally be our little girl. When the adoption match abruptly ended shortly before the baby was due, we were devastated. We knew things like this happened with adoption, but we didn’t think it would happen to us. It took several months to recover from the grief that accompanied this loss, and, even to this day, I think about what our lives would be like if that baby girl had been placed with us. The nursery door stays closed now and is a constant

One of the best things about our adoption journey is that I am able to connect with other hopeful mommies like myself.

reminder of what could have been and what we so desperately still hope for to this day.

Now, a year later, with three failed adoption matches behind us--two more after the first-our enthusiasm has grown thin. All of the failed matches have been hard, but none have hurt as much as that first one. We are completely worn out emotionally, physically, and financially from all the ups and downs of this year, and sometimes I wonder if having a child will ever actually happen for us. But, I have learned some very valuable lessons along the way. I have learned my marriage is strong, and my husband loves me even on the worst of days. I have learned we will be parents. Sometime, somehow we will absolutely have a child of our own. I know this because we have never once thought of giving up and cannot imagine our lives without children. I have also learned we are not alone. We have met so many other families that like us, have made huge sacrifices in the hopes of becoming parents.

Although adoption can be hard for both families involved, it is so worth it. Our child, whoever he/ she is, will be so lucky! We have hoped and prayed for them for so long, and they will be welcomed by our entire family who has prayed alongside us throughout this entire journey.

One of the best things about our adoption journey is I am able to connect with other hopeful mommies like myself through our adoption agency, the Independent Adoption Center. I have heard some beautiful adoption stories of new families forming and have also related to other stories of heartbreak. One thing we all have in common is our outlook for the future. I am learning to be patient and faithful with God’s plan for my family. I understand that, in His time, the baby meant for us will make his/her way into our lives...although waiting isn’t easy! So, we continue

to wait and talk about our journey in hopes it reaches the person who needs to hear it the most.

We continue to hope that one day our prepared nursery will be full of a child’s laughter.

If you or someone you know might be considering adoption, please tell them our story.

Our profile can be seen at www.iheartadoption.org/users/dnhall

Everyone Has a Different Normal

Going the Extra Mile Strength Training Fun: Guatemalan youth with TEAM OT Julie Marvin

TEAMworks therapists have volunteered their time to journey thousands of miles around the world serving children with special needs in the Ukraine, China, Guatemala, and Rwanda. When several therapists were asked to share about their experiences, they had many stories to tell.

A Story of Perseverance

A Guatemalan child, who had significant difficulties walking, traveled with his mother several miles on foot through mountainous terrain because the mother received news in their village that help might be available.

After making the cross-country trek and then waiting several hours to be seen, they met Children’s Therapy TEAM Physical Therapist Nicole Laferney. Nicole fit the child with specialized braces and shoes. She shares that she will never forget the depth of the mother’s gratitude shown to her on that day.

A Story of Compassion

Having served in orphanages with TEAMworks, Julie Marvin, a Children’s Therapy TEAM Occupational Therapist, feels heartbreak because around the world children with special needs are often more likely to be given up by their birth parents.

She says this is usually because of the stigma of having a child with special needs or because the parents simply do not have the resources to care for them. Referring to the almost decade of service TEAMworks has provided internationally, Julie shares, “Though we want to go out and instantly change the world, sometimes a little at a

48 July 2015

time is the better approach. It’s really about building relationships and trust in the beginning and going from there.”

A Story of Growth

Paige Funkhouser, a Children’s Therapy TEAM Speech Therapist, is a veteran to international fieldwork, having served on six international TEAMworks trips. Paige has often found parents, care providers, and medical staff are eager to learn from TEAMworks therapists.

She also acknowledges that, in building international relationships, she must open herself up to being changed by the experience as well. Paige readily acknowledges that she returns to Northwest Arkansas as a better therapist, having been challenged to think outside the sometimes strict parameters of her discipline.

Kym Hannah, President of the TEAMworks nonprofit and Co-founder of Children’s Therapy TEAM, agrees therapists and staff often return as better versions of themselves. She points to the fact that over the years, Children’s Therapy TEAM’s therapists and staff have collectively adopted into their own Northwest Arkansas families 18 children, 13 of whom have special needs.

She understands while the focus has always been on caring for those in need, inadvertently the experience itself often leaves a profound and indelible mark on the heart of those serving.

A perfect fit for a TEAMworks wheelchair

LEADING PEDIATRIC T H E R A P Y C A R E I N NWA Adaptive Recreation Activities + Aquatic Therapy + Family Support Services Funding Support + International Outreach + Occupational Therapy + Orthotics Physical Therapy + Serial Casting + Speech Therapy + VitalStim Therapy All in one Faith-based TEAM!

Believe in KIDS

The

Dalai Mama

by: Kristin Hvizda

Deep thoughts (well not that deep) on life as a mom, wife, and transplant in NWA

What I’ve learned in 10 years of Marriage

M

y husband and I ended up eloping in Vegas when we were 22 and 23 years old. It was a passion-fueled, impetuous decision that left our friends and family questioning my pregnancy status and our collective sanity. We knew we wanted to get married someday, but had no intention of marrying when we flew to Vegas for the weekend.

The universe, however, had other plans. While waiting in a lengthy line for a gondola ride at the Venetian Hotel, we discussed what we should do for the remainder of the day. I proposed that we get married and my husband accepted. We skipped the gondola ride, and within a few hours we had proper clothes, flowers, a marriage certificate, and an impromptu witness, in the form of our cab driver. Ya gotta love Vegas! We laughed loudly, cried freely, and were filled with the most incredible joy the night we said “I do.”

Now, ten years, two kids, and three states later, the excitement and spontaneity we experienced that unforgettable night in Clark County seems so far removed from our current life. Instead, we are fighting at 5:30am over who is going to get up with the kids, and our most impulsive decision lately was randomly purchasing a power washer.

How times change. Don’t get me wrong, I love my husband deeply and know without any doubt I was supposed to go on this life journey with him by my side. Yet, sometimes it can be really difficult to make time for romance or just get along. Between deadlines, managing a home, raising children, lack of sleep, and our length of time as a couple, we sometimes have little patience left for each other and our “quirks”. Carving out quality time together proves equally challenging. At the end of day, we are both so spent that we often settle into our typical routine of watching TV on the couch rather than engaging with each other in any meaningful or productive way. No one said marriage was going to be easy, but I didn’t imagine it to be especially hard. Surprise! It is hard, and whoever says otherwise is full of it.

Every marriage has its share of ups and downs.

There will be times when your relationship feels easy, light, and lovely, but also times when most encounters are a struggle and you just can’t seem to get on the same page. That’s normal. That’s what makes marriage a growing experience and each anniversary such an accomplishment. If it were easy, the divorce rate would be 1% instead of 50%. I’m proud and, frankly, shocked, considering the way in which we married, that I am about to embark on my 10th year of a happy marriage. Sure, there are times when even his breathing annoys me and I drive him up a wall, but the ups far outweigh the downs.

While my husband and I don’t share the same personality type or all the same views, we truly love and respect each other, differences and all. We’ve been able to find value in those differences and in the things that are important to one another.

Throughout the years, I’ve learned some valuable lessons that have made my marriage not only work, but, more importantly, feel fulfilling in spite of the tough times. I hope you find value in them as well.

1

The Gift of Gab: You have to keep the lines of communication open if you want your marriage to have a fighting chance. Talk about the big things, the small things, and anything in between. It’s important because knowing your partner (and not just in the biblical sense) fosters intimacy and conveys attentiveness any partner would appreciate. When you practice communicating openly and honestly about the small things in life, you’ve already set the groundwork to tackle the big stuff.

An open dialogue with your partner ensures you don’t fall into a major marital pitfall of “shutting down” and “shutting out” your spouse.

2

Nurture over Nature: Even when you have a brood of kids, worked 60 hours this week, and/or want nothing more than to curl up in the fetal position and go to

sleep at 7pm, make time for each other! Go out on dates, have date nights at home, go for walks just the two of you, and soak up each other’s undivided attention. Don’t talk about the stresses of work, home, or kids if you can help it. This is time for the two of you to relax and enjoy each other’s company.

3

Just Do It: Oprah once did a show about sexless marriages. Through experimentation she found having sex with your spouse every day improves your relationship. Many experts now agree sharing daily doses of intimacy and pleasure with your partner have the potential to benefit all aspects of your marriage. The result is feeling more desirable, less stressed, and likely less confrontational. Yes, this sounds exhausting and frankly who has the time, but a couple of times a week seems doable (no pun intended).

Nonetheless, your sex life needs to be a priority.

Otherwise, a crucial part of what makes marriage special will be lacking and you could end up feeling like long-term roomies.

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www.peekaboonwa.com

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4

Think happy thoughts…about each other: I strongly believe we become the stories we tell about ourselves. If you frame your marriage and partner in a negative light, then how can you ever expect to be happy with your marriage? However, if you focus on the positive in your partner and relationship, contentment will follow. My husband isn’t perfect, neither am I, nor is our relationship. I could say, “He doesn’t help out enough around the house”, “He works too much”, “We fight too much”, and “He doesn’t give me enough attention.” That focus on negativity breeds bitterness and more fighting. Instead I’ve learned to focus on all the things he and I do right.

“He helps me when I really need him and I know I can count on him.”

“He works hard to support our family.” “We have a passionate relationship with outstanding conflict resolution.” “He gives me my independence.” By re-framing the negatives into positives, I instantly feel better about our relationship while still being authentic to our circumstances.

5

Fight Fair: You are going to fight with your spouse; this is inevitable, but how you do it is of the utmost importance. It’s easy to unleash and unload when you are angry or hurt. Unfortunately, our partners sometimes get the worst versions of ourselves because we feel safe in their unconditional love but that doesn’t excuse it. Instead it’s important to exercise restraint, calm down, and discuss issues outside of the heat of the moment. Whenever possible, frame issues in a light manner, peppered with humor. Typically when my husband and I fight, whoever is calmer is able to crack a joke and diffuse the situation.

It’s important to try to put ego aside and not think of every fight as a battle of wills. No one wins when the fight continues to escalate.

6

Peace Treaty: Marriages can still work even when couples don’t share all the same hopes, fears, and dreams. The trick is to open a dialogue about why each feels this way and try to find value in each other’s opinions.

Maybe you really want a third baby and he doesn’t.

While this has the potential to cause a major rift in the marriage, knowing the underlying reasons for each other’s wants will hopefully lead to a mutual respect and understanding. If you approach the issue from a place of curiosity rather than on the offensive, true feelings can emerge. Maybe he feels as though your marriage has taken a back seat to raising children and he can’t wait to spend more time together. Even if you don’t agree, having the capacity to appreciate each other’s point of view will keep your intimacy intact.

7 52 July 2015

Power Sharing: Power and control may be the hottest commodity in any relationship, but especially a marriage. The days of “who wears the pants” in the family are hopefully coming to an end. Healthy marriages have learned that sharing the power increases contentment. Allowing your partner to influence your decisions, says that you respect your partner’s opinions and are willing to listen and share control.

Another significant form of power is vulnerability.

Allowing your partner to see you vulnerable, especially emotionally is an exchange of power and one that solidifies trust and intimacy.

8

Get Happy: There is a prevailing myth that your partner should be able to completely fulfill you--if you aren’t completely fulfilled, then it’s your partner’s fault and there is something wrong with your relationship. However, I’ve learned through the years that no one can complete you and if you are looking for someone to do that, you will end up disappointed. We have more needs than any one person can handle, so in the spirit of self-sanity we need to spread our neediness around. Friends, family, hobbies, and spirituality all help to fulfill us in ways that our significant other cannot and should not be expected to. Bringing a happy and whole self to your relationship is a necessary key to the success of the relationship as a whole.

On the cusp of my 10 year marriage anniversary, I know this is just a snapshot in time. Our relationship will continue to grow and change as we grow and change as individuals. Hopefully we will continue to grow together, but it isn’t just a “knock on wood” hope. It’s a hope sustained by hard work and a daily commitment to our marriage. It is said you fall in

and out of love throughout your marriage, but the commitment of marriage is what sustains the love. In some ways I think this is true. The type of love you experience changes over time. The “can’t think straight”, “butterflies in your stomach”, “heart racing” love you initially experience is replaced by a deeper, truer, albeit more monotonous love. There may even be times you can’t stand each other, but your commitment to your marriage and to making each other happy will get you through those times.

You’ll re-focus on making your partner feel heard, understood, respected, and appreciated--and things will fall back into place. You’ll begin to remember why you chose to marry this person in the first place.

Marriage isn’t set in stone, you have a choice on whether to call it quits when it gets hard or continue to choose each other. Don’t get complacent, make your choice every day, remember why you are choosing to do so, and do the work.

“A great marriage isn’t something that just happens; it’s something that must be created.”

Fawn Weaver

Dad’s View

Would You rather by: Ben Lacy

Would you rather give your kids a great life and miss it, or give your kids a good life and be a part of it?

Ever play this game? It is a question-andanswer game where you are given two options, but can only pick one.

more millionaires in NWA than gas stations in your hometown. That’s cuh-razy.

If you haven’t heard of it here are a few examples: Would you rather eat a bug or hold a snake?

Would you rather be able to fly or be invisible?

Would you rather be a movie star or an all-pro NFL quarterback?

Is spending 1 week in Italy blowing that big bonus worth 51 weeks of corporate confinement? I see it every day here in Vendorville and as a youth coach.

If Dad is able to make it to a game, his iPhone is permanently attached to his head like an electronic leech. Yes, the grind makes you a little less queasy about the upcoming colossal college cost and you may have the means to take an annual trip to far and exotic locales, but what about your daily relationship with your kids – and your wife? What are you teaching your kids? It is a slippery slope, and I’ve been down the slide. It’s not so pretty.

Here’s another one:

Would you rather give your kid’s a great life and miss it or give your kid’s a good life and be a part of it?

What I’m really asking is, are you willing to miss the good stuff in order to make more of the green stuff?

Would you rather have dinner each night with your family, or maximize your bonus?

Would you rather see your son’s basketball game or land the next account?

Would you rather have your weekly lunch date with your wife or impress a new client?

NWA is ridiculously awesome. No matter where you look, there is something new, something great, something unbelievable. We sit in one of the fastest growing and upwardly mobile areas in all of the good old U.S. of A. If you are looking for the land of corporate opportunity, well sonny, you done found it It’s not like there are winning lottery tickets littering the streets, but if you have a bit of sense along with some grit, spit and elbow grease the odds are forever in your favor (Did I really just quote Hunger Games? Not my fault; I have a 14year old daughter…). Case in point: if you are from a small town, such as I, there are probably

54 July 2015

But, the cash comes with a cost.

a

So here’s another “would you rather?”

Would you rather be rich or wealthy?

Hmmm….hey, Pops, aren’t those the same thing?

Not so grasshopper; pull up a chair.

Having abundant wealth is probably fantastic, definitely fun, but most assuredly fleeting. We’ve all seen the pic on Instagram/Twitter/Facebook of the two empty graves: One is the future home of a wealthy man, one is the future home of a poor man; both holes identical. Being rich, however, sounds like the right choice. Rich in spirit, rich in friendship, rich in family, that sounds like the better deal. As the saying goes, “If you have a family that loves you, a few close friends, food on the table and a roof over your head, you are far richer than you think.”

So, think about all of your options, not just your stock options, when deciding “would you rather?”

z

story by: Keisha Scott and Eva Lebens cover photo by: Hannah McLeod

Meet the July Cover Models

T rue Mont essori F riends

Z

enna Scott, one half of our fun-loving, cute cover models, lives with her parents, two brothers--Caiden, who is twelve, and Kylan, who is nine--and Chica, the Mexican rescued coyote dog, in Bentonville. Zenna has been heard to say that she does like the dog, but is still holding out hope for a baby unicorn to complete the family.

The Scotts recently lived in, ironically enough, Scottsdale for two years, before moving back to NWA and Bentonville just last June.

B

obbie Lebens, our other spunky and lovely cover girl, lives in Bentonville, too. She lives with her parents, elder brother Boris, who is nine, and elder sister Lucie who is six. Like Zenna, she and her family have lived other places besides NWA, as well. To be more specific, they are originally from the Netherlands and moved to the US one and a half years ago for the first time! Bobbie has a rabbit, but would like to have a “Labra-doodle” dog--which her family and friends find interesting, because she’s actually fairly afraid of dogs. In fact, whenever she plays at Zenna’s house, Chica has to be put away!

Zenna and Bobbie love dresses, art, dolls, dance, books, cooking, and playing with their friends.

Zenna and Bobbie met at Walnut Farm Montessori School, where they quickly became friends and part of a group of four very close girlfriends. Those girls hug and kiss each other all the time, and promise that they will later marry each other out of pure affection. Though they met at school, these

58 July 2015

little ones prefer talking about birthday parties and their new dresses to doing their lessons. The girls love school, though, and come home with huge smiles every day. because of the amazing instructors and teaching style at Walnut Farm Montessori. We LOVE Montessori education, and here’s why!

1. What does being raised Montessori mean?

By definition, Montessori is an educational approach developed by the famous Italian physician and educator Maria Montessori. Her philosophy is all about independence, freedom within limits, and respect for a child’s natural psychological, physical, and social development.

It’s a holistic approach of learning, both indoors and out!

2. T he outdoor classroom One of the first things we fell in love with about Walnut Farm was the outdoor classroom! Dr. Montessori believed that the outdoor environment is a natural extension of the classroom, not just a place reserved for recess. Children are able to increase their knowledge based on their experiences with the natural world. We believe that children who are truly aware of nature are better able to understand the needs of the world and how they can make a difference. In addition to this connection to nature, Montessori attempts to aid in the development of creating global citizens by

encouraging a peaceful existence among children while they’re outside and inside--encouraging teamwork, patience and communication.

This ‘peace education’ is one of the most beautiful concepts of Montessori philosophy. The work in their outdoor environment involves planting, growing food and herbs for use, wood working and taking care of animals. The kids come home and tell us, for example, which plants you can and can’t eat! We also love that if there is conflict in a classroom, or outdoors, the children are taught to use peaceful negotiation techniques.

Students are taught to help each other, as well as serve their community.

3. Mixed age groups A Montessori classroom has mixed age groups, meaning that the kids are not necessarily divided up into traditional ‘grades.’ A primary classroom typically has children ages 3 to 6, an elementary classroom 6 to 9, and upper elementary 9 to 12.

Their teachers are used to these combinations, and

understand completely that children of different ages have different needs and abilities.

The mixed ages are great, because, as anyone with small kids has probably discovered, children of the same ages aren’t necessarily on the same plane of development. We like that the younger child learns from observing the older child, and that the older child likes to help “teach” the younger child. After all, in the work environment, we don’t work with all people the same age or sex. We believe it’s a true benefit that our younger kids can make friends with elder children.

4. Children choose their own work Students choose their own learning from a prescribed range of options, which are in a prepared environment. The environment itself is the best teacher, and it is carefully prepared with lessons the child can choose. Rather than dictating what and when a child should learn, the classroom is designed so the student can choose the work they are interested in. So, students learn concepts from working with materials hands on, rather than direct instruction.

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This also allows for free movement within the classroom.

Child-led learning speaks to us, as all our children were interested in learning and reading at their own pace. It has been remarkable for us to see how quickly they learn when they are ready, not when they are told they should be ready.

5. Practical life lessons Montessori classrooms put an emphasis on practical life lessons, which help children perfect their coordination, concentration, attention to detail, and develop good working habits through lessons like window washing, washing dishes, paring vegetables, or polishing shoes. It provides a wonderful basis for our children to want to help at home with cleanup, laundry and food prep-and it’s especially nice when they know how not to chop their fingers off!--cleanup, and even laundry.

Additionally, the desire to help is made intrinsic.

There is no reward system. Our kids just simply want to contribute. In fact, a typical Montessori classroom offers no reward or punishment, does

not “grade,” and does not foster competition amongst classmates, but rather a competition within each child to do their best and foster a love of learning.

6. Montessori materials The materials used are very different from the materials found in a traditional classroom. Maria Montessori developed specific materials to teach lessons in the Montessori classroom. Everything is designed and presented individually or in group lessons to teach specific concepts. Materials are also designed to progress as you move up in the next three-year cycle.

A Montessori child does not sit down and memorize addition and subtraction facts or multiplication tables. Our children learned these facts by actually performing the operations with concrete materials. This allows for a real understanding of what the operation means.

We believe that Montessori education is a wonderful way for our children to grow into strong, wise and confident individuals--sometimes a bit too wise, as they won’t stop questioning the things we say! It’s a wonderful journey, and our entire family has made friends for life. If you want to explore for yourself, pay one of the NWA Montessori schools a visit!

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Fallen Soldier Memorial Siloam Springs

by: Frances Wilson

F

or Siloam Springs, it’s going to be an especially patriotic summer. A united effort, which began on Memorial Day two years ago by their community’s American Legion and Veterans of Foreign Wars Posts, has resulted in the creation of what will be a beautiful Siloam Springs Fallen Soldier Memorial. Those heading up the project hope to open the memorial by late summer or, very latest, fall, and intend for the memorial to be dedicated “In honor of Siloam Springs, Arkansas’s heroes who gave the ultimate sacrifice during World War I through Operation New Dawn.” We sat down with J. W. Smith, the committee chairperson, to discuss the details.

“It all started on Memorial Day of 2013,” Smith began, “when the speaker of the day, Lt. Colonel John Easley challenged the veterans of Siloam Springs to put something together to honor those who gave the ultimate sacrifice for our community.

At the time, I was the commander of the American Legion, and Frank Lee, my associate in this endeavor, had just become the commander of the VFW. We got to talking and decided to form a joint committee, separate from both organizations, to act completely on its own to take on this project.

The committee was, and still is, comprised of three members from each organization and is chaired by the Vice Commander of the American Legion.

Of course, over time, members of the committee came and went, but we still managed to get a lot done.”

62 July 2015

“Our first task was to come up with a design for the memorial--a design that both organizations would approve. We also needed to search for the names of fallen veterans to go on the memorial. At the beginning, Lt. Colonel Easley found 33 names from World War I up until the current war, and we have since found six more for a total of 39 names.

One of the names on that list,” said Smith, “and one of the first names we put down, in fact, will be Rex Wayne Blisard.”

Blisard’s story is an honorable, but tragically short one. Blisard was born on July 15, 1949, nearly 66 years ago in Siloam Springs. He graduated in 1967 from Siloam Springs High School with a legacy of being a star football player and avid rodeo participant. He then went to Arkansas Tech in Russellville that fall; however, he decided to join the army to go fight in Vietnam, leaving on October 4, 1968. He was killed in action 95 days later, on January 9, 1969, when he was nineteen years old. During his short time of service, Rex received the Silver Star, the Bronze Star Medal, the Air Medal, the Purple Heart, the Good Conduct Medal, and the Combat Infantrymen Medal. Prior to his passing, Rex had received the National Defense Service Medal, the Vietnam Service Medal, the Vietnam Campaign Ribbon, and the Marksman Badge with Rifle Bar. His family and friends remembered him as “a happy-go-lucky kid who loved life.” Of course, Rex is one of many heroes who will be honored with the memorial, all with their own unique, memorable, and noble stories.

“We want to include all the sons and daughters of Siloam Springs who went into service with Siloam Springs as their home on record,” Smith stated.

“That being said, if anyone knows of someone who has not made our list yet, please contact us as soon as possible. We want to give reverence to as many of these folks as we can find. Plus, we’re hoping,” Smith went on, “we can break ground in June of 2015, but we’ll do it no later than September 11, 2015. Our completion date is going to be no later than November 11, 2015, but it’s possible we’ll have it even sooner. That’s our goal. Of course, it would be great to dedicate the memorial in time for September 11th.”

“The memorial itself,” Smith said, “will definitely have a battlefield cross.

The inclusion of that was something we agreed upon from the beginning. The inscription on the cross will be ‘To the world they were soldiers; to their families, they were the world.’

We’ll have the five service emblems, an inscription, and the names of those who sacrificed, as well as a trio of flags--the POW/MIA flag, the United States flag, and the Arkansas flag. They will fly 24 hours a day, seven days a week, and they will be lit.”

The memorial has been funded by a small grant, several sponsors, and several donation jars at local businesses. They are currently selling bricks, and local folks have out-and-out donated, so the committee is currently at just over 50% of their goal. If you’d like to contribute to the fund, checks at the Centennial Bank can be made payable to the “Siloam Springs KIA Memorial Fund”. Bricks, as stated, are also still available for purchase.

If you know of anyone from Siloam Springs who would be a candidate for placement on the wall of the memorial--anyone killed in action or missing in action from any US conflict--please send an email to Frank Lee at bflees@cox.net. More information can be found on the memorial’s Facebook page, under “Siloam Springs Fallen Soldiers Memorial”.

Northwest Medical Center Springdale Achieves National Accreditation from the Metabolic and Bariatric Surgery Accreditation and Quality Improvement Program Northwest Medical Center-Springdale in Northwest Arkansas meets all criteria as a Metabolic and Bariatric Surgery Accreditation and Quality Improvement Program (MBSAQIP) Comprehensive Center according to national quality standards established to deliver safe, high quality bariatric patient care

I

n the United States, around 15.5 million people suffer from severe obesity according to the National Institutes of Health, and the numbers continue to increase. Obesity increases the risks of morbidity and mortality because of the diseases and conditions commonly associated with it, such as type II diabetes, hypertension, and cardiovascular disease, among other health risks.

Bariatric surgery has proven to be effective in the reduction of many illnesses related to severe obesity and is a tool to help patients achieve substantial weight loss and live longer, happier lives. Luckily for our community, Northwest Medical Center-Springdale, recently received national accreditation for its surgical weight loss program.

Sharif Omar, CEO, Northwest Health System said Northwest Medical Center–Springdale has been designated as an accredited center by the Metabolic and Bariatric Surgery Accreditation and Quality Improvement Program (MBSAQIP), a joint program of the American College of Surgeons (ACS) and the American Society for Metabolic and Bariatric Surgery (ASMBS).

After a lengthy and rigorous review process, including demonstrating low complication rates from bariatric surgery, a committed long-term plan for follow-up care, data submissions, and outstanding patient outcomes, the ASMBS and the ACS designated the bariatric weight loss surgery program at Northwest Medical Center-Springdale as an MBSAQIP Accredited Center, the highest recognition given. This accreditation assures patients that the surgeons and hospital perform weight loss surgery at the highest possible level with low complication rates and excellent long-term results. The Springdale program is led and supported by the surgeons at Roller Weight Loss and Advanced Surgery.

“It is truly an honor to be part of this program and to have been awarded this prestigious recognition,”

64 July 2015

Joshua Roller, MD said. “It’s a testament to all of the hard work our entire team has put in while building one of the best surgical weight loss programs in the country. This Accreditation ensures anyone who is considering weight loss surgery that we have a designated bariatric care team, led by the most experienced bariatric surgeons in the area who are ready to provide the highest level of surgical care available. The typical bariatric patient has researched weight loss surgery for at least a year before they seek out a surgeon. They are very knowledgeable about weight loss surgery and know it is critical to have surgery at an MBSAQIP accredited hospital.”

To better understand the impact of such a procedure on the lives of patients, we talked to Mr. James Young, a veteran and enthusiastic advocate of bariatric surgery and of Dr. Joshua Roller’s program at Northwest. Here is his story: “Back in 1999, I moved to Springdale, Arkansas.

At the time, I was what you’d call a ‘larger human being’, but I was younger and decided I’d lose the weight the old-fashioned way,” Young said. “I started off running, and ended up running two marathons, losing 120 pounds my first year in the process. I started at 360 pounds and was at 240 pounds by the time I did my first half. I was in awesome shape.”

“In 2004, however, I got a new job with lots of international travel, which just made my routine fall apart. By 2012, I’d gained back all the weight I’d lost. For someone who played college football and generally considered himself a pretty athletic person, it was disappointing. That kind of thing will mess with you, psychologically. The thing was, in 2012, I was in the latter half of my forties with my knees and back gone, so I couldn’t just train for marathons again. I’d been looking at surgery for quite a while when I reached a tipping point.

That year, while I was on a business trip to China, fighting to sit in my airplane seat with a seatbelt that I couldn’t buckle and frustrated as all get out.

In that moment, I told myself, ‘I’m done with this.

The surgery is going to happen.’”

After

Before

“Once I got back to the States, I went to Roller at Northwest, and he gave me exactly the advice I needed to hear. ‘James,’ he said, ‘If you had a heart problem, I’d give you heart surgery, right? Well, it’s the same with a fat problem.’ Apparently, I was the healthiest fat man he’d seen, as I didn’t have any of the issues that usually accompany this kind of weight gain--no high blood pressure or diabetes.

I was just fat, and totally mentally done with fighting the daily fight of losing weight. The only person I told about my surgery before I did it was my wife, who’s a registered dietician--and she was more nervous about it than I was! At work, I just told everyone that I was going on vacation for a few days in August.”

“The surgery itself was, honestly, incredibly smooth. I literally spent one night in the hospital after the operation, and went home the next day and walked two miles. That may seem pretty incredible, but here’s the secret: if you’re going to do this--have this surgery, and truly change your life--you just have to get your mind right and attack it. It’s way more mental than physical. You have to be ready for the life change, and you have to take it and make it yours. My mind was right, and I was convinced that following the doctor’s orders for eating and walking was exactly what I needed. The weight fell off me so quickly. I bought pants I never even got to wear. Now, I’ve lost 140 lbs., and I’m down to 220 lbs.”

“After the surgery and after seeing the incredible results, I was so excited. I told everyone and anyone who would listen about it, and how it was, to me, the most incredible thing I’d ever participated in.

I went to the support group, which was awesome, and ended up mentoring about 18 different people.

I’m a huge believer in the process, because I truly believe it changes your world. My entire life changed. My energy levels went up, I could travel more easily, and I could bike and run if I wanted to.

I’ve been talking people into the surgery, through the prep work, met them at the hospital, and counseled them afterwards. I’ve talked friends and

extended family through the pro c e s s - - e ve n my own son!

He’s six months into recovery, and has lost 80 pounds so far.”

“For me, the motivation to do something came from a desire for a better quality of life. I was already healthy on the inside, and just needed the tools to fight back against my genetic predisposition to gain weight. I wanted to buy normal clothes, feel like my old self, and have fun with my wife and family again, with no setbacks or impediments. Truth be told, I wanted to buckle my seatbelt on the airline when I flew! Asking for that extender clip was especially humiliating for me, as a former athlete.

For anyone, I think, it might be a little humiliating.

Now, it wasn’t a self-esteem issue for me, as I didn’t feel any particular loss of confidence when I gained the weight. I believe that a lot of other people, however, go through very extreme selfesteem issues when faced with a weight problem.

That’s why the comprehensive process under Dr. Roller is so great--it provides an amazing support system. I can’t recommend Roller enough--he’s a phenomenal surgeon, and an incredibly smart person.”

At a Glance

At a Glance ARTS and MUSIC

Crystal Bridges (Pg. 43) (479) 418-5700 crystalbridges.org Imagine Studios (Pg. 23) (479) 619-6085 9 imagine-studios.com Trike Theatre (Pg. 60) (479) 464-5084 triketheatre.org

First Security (Pg. 71) www.fsbank.com; www.onlyinark.com

BANKS

CHILDCARE/NANNY SERVICES

ABC Happy Kids (Pg. 51) (479) 202-5691 abchappykids.com Better Beginnings (Pg. 67) (800) 445-3316 arbetterbeginnings.com The Kid’s Studio (Pg. 63) (479) 268-6675 www.thekidsstudio.com Mary’s Little Lambs (Pg. 31) (479) 273-1011

CHURCHES

Unitarian Universalist (Pg. 45) www.uubcar.com

DANCE/CHEER/TUMBLE/STRETCH

High Pointe (Pg. 15) (479) 544-1457 www.highpointedance.com The Little Gym (Pg. 52) (479) 636-5566 tlgrogersar.com Total Barre (Pg. 29) (479) 586-4744 www.nwapilates.com

DENTIST

Smile Shoppe Pediatric Dentistry (Pg. 12) (479) 631-6377

DERMATOLOGY

NWA Center for Plastic Surgery (Pg. 2) (479) 571-3100 nwacenterforplasticsurgery.com

Advanced Dermatology and Skin Cancer Center (Pg. 41) (479) 268-3555 advancedskinmd.com

EDUCATION/TRAINING

Fayetteville Public Library (Pg. 55)

(479) 856-7000 faylib.org

Gideon (Pg. 39)

(479) 521-6500

Larson’s Language Center (Pg. 37)

(479) 633-9900

The New School (Pg. 47) thenewschool.org

Rogers Historical Museum (Pg. 29)

(479) 621-1154

Shiloh Christian School (Pg. 56)

(479) 756-1140

Walnut Farm Montessori (Pg. 70)

(479) 271-9424 walnutfarmmontessori.com

FAMILY FUN / ENTERTAINMENT

The Amazeum (Pg. 72) amazeum.org Crystal Bridges (Pg. 43) (479) 418-5700 Fast Lane Entertainment (Pg. 4) (479) 659-0999 www.fastlanebowl.com Fayetteville Public Library (Pg. 55) (479) 856-7000 faylib.org Little Giggles (Pg. 19) (479) 268-4949 Rogers Activity Center (Pg. 57) (479) 631-0336 ext. 438 Rogers Historical Museum (Pg. 29) (479) 621-1154 Starlight Skatium (Pg. 59) (479) 444-STAR

TCBY (Pg. 3) (479) 636-8229 (TCBY)

FOOD / DRINK

HAIRCUT / SALON

Pigtails & Crewcuts (Pg. 20)

(479) 935-4121

HEALTH AND WELLNESS

Northwest Primary Care (Pg. 13) nw-physicians.com

Tate HealthCare (Pg. 33, 69)

(479) 271-6511 www.tatehealthcare.com

JEWELRY AND GIFTS

David Adams (Pg. 53) davidadams.com

LEARNING CENTER

ABC Happy Kids Learning Academy (Pg. 51) (479) 621-6126 www.abchappykids.com

MARTIAL ARTS

ATA (Pg. 8)

Bentonville: (479) 273-1212 Fayetteville: (479) 443-5425 PRO Martial Arts (Pg. 11) (479) 250-9899

OPTOMETRIST

Pediatric Vision Development Center (Pg. 23) nwavisiontherapy.com (479) 795-1411

PEDIATRICIAN

To be a part of the Peekaboo Family email editor@peekaboonwa.com

Bright Haven (Pg. 25) (479) 717-2344 Larson’s Language Center (Pg. 37) (479) 633-9900

Best Start Pediatric Clinic (Pg. 17) (479) 575-9359 Bentonville Pediatric Clinic (Pg. 26) (479) 273-5437 The Children’s Clinic at Springdale (Pg. 9) (479) 751-2522 Friendship Pediatric Services (Pg. 46) Lowell: (479) 770-0744 Siloam Springs: (479) 524-2465 West Fork: (479) 839-3359 MANA NWA Pediatric Clinic (Pg. 35) (479) 443-3471

WOMEN’S HEALTH

Birth Center NWA (Pg. 38) (479) 372-4560 bcnwa.com Lifespring Women’s Health (Pg. 27) (479) 271-0005 lifespringhealthcare.com Northwest Convenient Care (Pg. 21) (800) 734-2024 Northwest Primary Care of Springdale (Pg. 13) (479) 927-2100 Northwest Women’s Health Associates (Pg. 7) (479) 503-2525 Parkhill Clinic for Women (Pg. 55) (479) 521-4433 Siloam Springs Women’s Center (Pg. 66) (479) 524-9312 siloamwomenscenter.com Willow Creek Hospital (Pg. 5) (479) 757-3000

PLASTIC SURGEON

NWA Center for Plastic Surgery (Pg. 2)

(479) 571-3100 www.nwacenterforplasticsurgery.com

PRESCHOOL/ PRE-K

ABC Happy Kids Learning Academy (Pg. 51)

(479) 621-6126 www.abchappykids.com

The Kid’s Studio (Pg. 63)

(479) 268-6675 www.thekidsstudio.com

Mary’s Little Lambs (Pg. 31)

(479) 273-1011

The New School (Pg. 47) thenewschool.org

Walnut Farm Montessori (Pg. 70)

(479) 271-9424 walnutfarmmontessori.com

SPORTS

Hawg Start Swim School (Pg. 15) (479) 310-5292 coachkary@aquahawgs.org

THERAPY

ABC Happy Kids Learning Academy (Pg. 51)

(479) 621-6126 www.abchappykids.com

Children’s Therapy T.E.A.M (Pg.49) www.childrenstherapyteam.com

Tate HealthCare (Pg. 33, 69)

(479) 271-6511

www.peekaboonwa.com

69

ee

Experience. Discover. Grow.

Walnut Farm Montessori School Building a Foundation for Growth

Montessori Toddler Program 18 months-3 years old Walnut Farm offers flexible 2, 3, and 5 day toddler programs available in half day and full day options.​

• Well prepared, peaceful environments that support learning and development • Dedicated, nurturing, trained teachers • Developmentally appropriate curriculum that fosters cognitive development, speech and language development, fine and gross motor skill enhancement • Nutritious meals prepared onsite daily for full day students • Before and after school programs offered Walnut Farm Montessori School is the first and only school accredited by the American Montessori Society in the State of Arkansas and the first school to offer a natural playscape environment for exercise and exploration. Our school provides an authentic Montessori education for children ages 18 months to 12 years.

Enrolling Now

Contact us today to schedule your tour of our enriching toddler program

479-271-9424 • info@walnutfarm.org

www.walnutfarmmontessori.com