The Sex Issue (2016)

first peek

Before this summer, I had never lived on my own for more than a week. I moved out of my parents’ place with my partner, with whom I still live (happily). Without getting into details, let’s just say that my sex life has been pretty consistent for the past few years, and I’ve never really felt the need to add anything extra to my solo sessions.

That is, until my partner decided to pursue a field school in Germany for the semester.

Faced with the prospect of two months alone with my hand, a box of tissues, and a spotty Internet connection, I did what many would do in my position. I decided to buy myself a sex toy.

I like to do a little research before I make a big purchase, so I spent a few days searching through Amazon reviews, looking up independent sex shops, and browsing Internet forums and review sites.

While I did end up finding something that works for me, most of the toys I found ended up confirming a long-held suspicion: sex toys for folks with penises are the worst.

Seriously. Walk into any sex store and you’re likely to see one of two scenes: either all the male sex toys will feature sleazy, sexist portraits of big-breasted women with pouty lips and thick blonde hair, or the selection of male toys will be limited to flavoured condoms and maybe a cock ring or two.

On the other hand, most other sex toys — whether they be femalecentric, like dildos and vibrators, or relatively gender-neutral toys like butt plugs or handcuffs — are comparably classy and, well, normal.

Though there’s definitely a weird streak of dildo brands featuring pictures of naked ladies on them, people with vaginas looking to have a good time tend to have a much wider variety of options at their disposal, most of which are not overly offensive or cringe-inducing.

It should come as no surprise that a lot of this is a result of a patriarchal system which compels men (and women) to think of women as objects. This is the main reason there are so many weird, uncomfortable toys moulded after female porn stars’ various orifices, or given gross names like “MILF in a Box.” But there’s another factor at play here, too: straight men tend to be more afraid of experimenting with

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their sexuality. This is part of what people are talking about when they joke that masculinity is fragile: many guys are so afraid of falling outside culturally acceptable expressions of maleness that they’d probably be unwilling to purchase a more neutral, less misogynistic male sex toy.

In fact, many are not even willing to experiment at all. A 2014 survey by The Guardian found that only 39 percent of British men had ever used sex toys, as opposed to 52 percent of women. Male sex toys remain a taboo, despite being a totally normal and natural tool for expressing one’s sexuality.

Some have even claimed that men simply don’t need sex toys. The argument goes that, since men masturbate so often, they’re good enough at it already and don’t need any help.

I don’t buy that. Sure, sex toys aren’t for everyone, but that shouldn’t stop men from experimenting with their sexuality solo just because they can get themselves off without. That’s like saying you might as well never have sex ever again, because you can just jerk off.

For the record, there are some good sex toys for guys on the market. I’m a particularly big fan of the sleeves made by Tenga, a Japanese company whose toys are so pretty you almost don't want to use them.

(Almost.) But until men become more comfortable with their sexuality and stop ordering so many gross, sexist vagina moulds, we’ll be stuck with the underwhelming selection we currently have. What a turn-off.

4 News

Jamal Dumas / Print News Editor

news@the-peak.ca

Burnaby: MBC 0101, at the bottom of the Maggie Benston Centre Vancouver: Room 300, across from the SFU bookstore on the bottom floor Surrey: Room 2534 (counselling only) Appointments must be scheduled — no drop-ins. Give HCS a call or go in person to book an appointment. I called, and got an appointment the next day.

HCS appointments are covered

by MSP and out of province healthcare. They are free to book, but cancellations will cost you.

University is a time when many students leave home for the first time and are free to explore and experience new things. Accordingly, SFU Health and Counselling Services (HCS) offers free services for all students, in order to make sure that they take care of their mental and sexual health.

Syphilis is on the rise in Canada — so much so that the demand for medication is too high for local suppliers to keep up.

Pfizer is Canada’s only manufacturer of Bicillin, the best antibiotic to treat syphilis, and is currently so depleted, they don’t anticipate being able to rebound until this month. The shortage has gone on for months, leading Health Canada to reach out to countries such as Australia for supplemental medication.

Students have an “opportunity to take control of their own health,” Martin Mroz, director of SFU HCS, told The Peak. Without a family doctor present, students can freely inquire about birth control, sexual activity, and mental health without having to worry that their parents might find out.

Being proactive about sexual health is important, because “a lot of things change in university,” said Mroz. Even if not sexually active, students have relationships and are exposed to parties, drugs, and alcohol for the first time. SFU HCS offers education on these subjects.

For students who are already sexually active, it’s important to have regular check-ups. Reports show that STIs have increased in the past decade across Canada and North America.

“There’s still a lot of taboo” when talking about sexually transmitted infections, birth

control, and mental health, explained Mroz. SFU HCS offers stigma-free information and counsellors who are clinically certified.

“I think we as a society have become more open about things like nudity, but when you start talking about birth control or STIs, it’s still more awkward with more shame involved,” said Mroz.

There’s a lot of misinformation about healthy relationships and lifestyles in the media, said Tammy Blackwell, manager of clinical health services at SFU. HCS offers better education for SFU students.

Vancouver has not been immune to this outbreak. A recent syphilis outbreak amongst gay and bisexual men has left doctors advising young men to get tested. According to Vancouver Coastal Health, 97 percent of syphilis cases they see are present in men, and over 90 percent are men who have sex with other men. The current rate of the sexually transmitted infection (STI) is the highest it’s been in 30 years, with nearly 500 cases reported in 2015.

This is in line with the rest of Canada, where the average number of cases jumped from less than one in 100,000 to over six in 2013, which gives a jump of nearly 700 percent over the 15-year span.

Syphilis is a common bacterial infection transmitted through vaginal, anal, or oral intercourse with someone who has the infection. It can also be transmitted through the sharing of needles, or through childbirth.

Although it sometimes exhibits no symptoms whatsoever, having syphilis can increase the risk of contracting HIV. As well, syphilis can have serious long-term effects, such as blindness, bone pain, neurological issues, and sometimes death.

Syphilis can remain dormant in the body for several years without showing symptoms. However, during the dormant stage, it is still possible to transmit the infection, which is why getting tested is so crucial.

Once tested, early-stage syphilis can be cured through the use of penicillin or other antibiotics.

In February, Vancouver Coastal Health collaborated with other sex-positive health organizations such as the BC Centre for Disease Control YouthCO and Health Initiative for Men, to create an LGTBQ-friendly marketing campaign. The ads went up on public transit, in newspapers, and on dating websites in February,

There is a wide range of sexual health services and supplies, including: birth control resources and information, pregnancy tests and information on what to do if there’s a bun in the oven, STI testing and education, UTI testing, and “Well-Woman Exams” which can include Pap smears, pelvic exams, blood pressure checks, and breast exams.

SFU Health and Counselling Services has free condoms, and offers NuvaRings and oral contraceptives (the Pill) that must be prescribed by a doctor. The SFSS offers free contraceptives through the Women’s Centre and Out on Campus. This includes condoms, lube, flavoured condoms, female condoms, and dental dams.

They offer many different vaccinations against hepatitis, HPV, and a range of other illnesses both sexually and non-sexually transmitted.

when the VCH announced a formal outbreak response.

BC and Canada aren't the only areas seeing a spike in the infection. Syphilis and gonorrhea are both spiking in the UK due to a lack of funding for STI testing resources. This crisis is also disproportionately affecting men who have sex with other men, as well as lower-income individuals who don’t always have access to the health resources they need.

According to Vancouver Coastal Health, men who have sex with men should get tested for syphilis every three to six months, and talk to their doctor if any unusual skin irritations occur around their genitals.

News

Can love only happen between two people? Not necessarily, and there are many individuals who live in polyamorous relationships to prove that. The first question those of us who don’t practice polyamory usually ask is: how do you deal with jealousy?

While completing her PhD in the department of sociology at SFU, Dr. Jillian Deri wanted to explore this question and understand more about how polyamorous couples navigate jealousy. Her research on the subject led to the creation of the book Love’s Refraction: Jealousy and Compersion in Queer Women’s Polyamorous Relationships, which was written with the intention of appealing to anyone who is interested in polyamory, emotions, and love.

Deri explained to The Peak that those who practice polyamory “want love and emotional connections, and sexual connections with multiple people where everyone knows about it.” This is distinct from consensual non-monogamy, where there is usually one main partner with sexual explorations outside of the relationship, and from cheating where sexual explorations outside of the relationship are unknown and not consensual.

Whereas jealousy is certainly an aspect of polyamorous relationships — and to an extent, arguably all relationships — polyamorous relationships also aim to achieve compersion.

Deri describes compersion as the opposite of jealousy: it refers to the positive feelings one has about their partner’s experiences in other relationships.

“When a friend does really well you feel happy for them, and [compersion is about] translating that joy into a romantic context,” Deri explained.

For the book, Deri chose to focus on queer, lesbian, and bisexual women because they tend to be understudied. She also wanted to

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July 18, 2016

investigate whether there was a unique culture among polyamorous queer women that differs from heterosexual polyamorous relationships. She accomplished this by interviewing queer women in polyamorous relationships to learn what the community was doing to achieve compersion.

Deri found that “there is a culture to it, and there is potentially different dynamics between queer culture and heterodynamics.” This is partly shown in the different challenges faced by women in these relationships. In queer communities, there tends to be more overlap between partners since the dating pool is smaller than it is for heterosexuals. Therefore, there is an increased likelihood of, for example, knowing your ex’s new lover.

This unique experience in the community brings about accountability and care because there is an increased likelihood of coming across one another again.

When asked whether polygamy or monogamy are a result of human nature or socialization, Deri explained that it is likely a combination of both.

“Some people feel much more at ease with open relationships, [and] some people feel more at ease with monogamous relationships. Just like how some people might be more inclined to be queer, [some] straight, some bi, I think we might have a bit of an orientation towards monogamy, or open [relationships], or polyamory.”

While it might seem that open relationships have become more common in recent years, Deri notes that it’s difficult to tell what percentage of the population pursues polyamorous relationships. In fact, the very definition of what it means to be in different styles of relationships can be tough to define.

“It’s hard to know where to draw the line,” Deri said. “Hookup culture, to me that’s a form of nonmonogamy, and should be valued as a way of doing relationships too.”

Among millennials, it is also very common to have multiple partners

with the intention of eventually ending up in a monogamous relationship, she noted.

There is a spectrum of ways to be in a polyamorous relationship, and with increased access to information

it is easier than ever for individuals to learn how to pursue such a relationship successfully.

Fall 2016 Courses GSWS 204-3 Sex and the City

Mondays: 14:30 — 17:20 at Harbour Centre

Dr. Muller Myrdahl

This course explores the sexual politics of urban spaces by examining questions such as: What are the explicit and implicit ways that certain forms of sexuality (as well as sex acts and gender expression) are promoted or policed? Whose bodies - and which practices - are managed? How and where do these forms of management take place? The course examines various aspects of the urban form (including but not limited to: the built environment, social relations, laws and policies, oral histories, and memorial landscapes) to investigate the ongoing conversation between cities and the intimate lives of their residents. Please note: this course asks students to consider explicit content - sex acts, not just sexual identities - in order to think through the mutual production of cities and sexualities.

GSWS 318-4 ST: Political Representations of Women in Film and Literature Wednesdays: 9:30 — 13:20

Dr. Kotsovili

This course reflects on past and present representations of women in a wide range of writings and films produced in N. America, Europe, the Balkans and Latin America. The objective of the course is to analyze the selected visual and textual narratives so as to reflect on the specific social contexts and the prevailing cultural and gender norms. Specifically, it will examine: i) the impact the national and political contexts have upon the individual women, their personal histories, political engagement, memories and identities, ii) their own agency and tales of empowerment. It will offer a critical analysis on the continuities and discontinuities of women’s representations while reflecting on post/modernity, gender, politics, philosophy, theory and broader contemporary debates.

GSWS 323-4 STT: Gender and Performance

Tuesdays: 13:30 — 17:20 at Harbour Centre

Dr. Colby

During this course, students will study plays and films about writers and historical figures in order to learn the structures of drama that they themselves will use in researching and writing a play based in the autobiographical materials of a figure of their own choosing. In a respectful workshop environment, students will refine their plays and perform a scene from their own work at the end of term. In addition to the creative component of the course, we will consider various theoretical aspects of performing gender and identity, including strategies of self-narration, the formation of fictive selves, and the performance of identity in everyday life.

GSWS 350-4 Public Policy for Women Thursdays: 13:30 — 17:20

Dr. Muller Myrdahl

In Canada, profound shifts are occurring in the ways that women and gender inequalities are treated in public policy. The progressive changes that characterized the results of earlier feminist action have been undermined: the issue of gender equality has been all but erased from government focus and action. This course will address the reasons behind, and responses to, these changes at different scales of government (e.g., municipal, provincial, federal). The course will also interrogate how policies are explicitly or implicitly gendered and racialized, and will identify what characterizes public policy that meets women’s needs. The course will expose students to current public policies and their relationship to women on a wide range of topics (including, but not limited to, child care, economic security, policing, and safety). An integral part of this course is student research into and analysis of existing public policy.

All GSWS course outlines available at: www.sfu.ca/gsws

6 Opinions

I’m 20 years old, single, and I’ll come out and say it right now: I’m a proud virgin. However, in the past, I was a closeted virgin — not just because I had never had sex, but because I was scared to.

There are many different connotations and feelings associated with sex — things that my friends have always talked about. When they described to me their first times and the many times after, I nodded enthusiastically and pretended I understood them.

At 16 years old, one of my good friends at the time was already boasting about how she did it with her boyfriend in the shower, and while my face showed approval, inside my heart was racing at the fact that she had been ‘initiated.’

In the eyes of our society, she was now an adult.

As more of my friends began to lose their virginity, I began to question myself and my ability to make someone like me. Was it my weight, or my glasses? Was I annoying, or too uptight? Was I just not pretty enough? These questions threw me into a depression that caused me to lose myself in this urge to grow up.

I flirted relentlessly with guys, trying to come off as carefree and fun, until one day I finally had a boyfriend.

This boyfriend was the first person who expressed a desire to have sex with me. He told me how my body was perfect, and how he wanted to get inside of me and show me that he

loved me. For a while, I liked the sound of that. I thought that I had finally found someone who respected me and actually liked me for who I was.

However, there were two problems with this magical bridge into what I thought to be adulthood. The first was that, as a strong Catholic, I was taught that sex had to be reserved for marriage, and I wasn’t going to compromise my faith for a guy that I supposedly loved.

But the even bigger problem was that I was scared. I had zero experience, and to top it off, the idea of having sex with this guy made me squeamish.

While I thought I loved him, I didn’t know if I actually loved him. Even though he was saying all these things I wanted to hear, I wasn’t ready to give all of myself to him.

Unfortunately, these thoughts were not something that my then-boyfriend wanted to hear, so much so that he tried to force himself onto me multiple times with brute force and violence. He called me prudish, a slut for flirting, and unfaithful. When he broke up with me I was devastated, but in retrospect, this painful lesson was one of the best things that ever happened to me.

There is no magic age at which everyone has sex. You have sex when you are ready, not when your friends are getting knocked up and talking about it. One so-called innocent night could lead you to a whole host of problems like emotional stress, confusion, compromising your own physical health, and a potential baby that you may not be ready for. We live in a society that is so charged with the fear of ‘missing out’ that we forget to step back and think about the consequences.

Being a virgin does not mean that you are lacking something.

Saving your virginity is a decision that you have full control over, and it is nothing to be ashamed of.

I think I’ve been watching too much gay porn.

It's no shock that the media we consume, be it visual or auditory, affects our opinions of people and situations in the world. We know that music can induce certain emotional responses, or that we can become desensitized to disturbing content the more that we watch it. Some suggest that advertising works on a subconscious level. Point being, the media we are exposed to can affect our perceptions on life.

I saw this guy the other day. He was a gorgeous South Asian man.

Cocoa dark skin and curly black hair — and oh, the way I wanted him to look at me. Let’s just say the entirety of the song “Finally”

by CeCe Peniston went through my head, and I had one of those ‘our lives together’ moments: loft apartment downtown overlooking English Bay, maybe a small dog or a cat, dinner parties, game nights with friends, travelling the world, and growing old together. This all came to a shattering end when he embraced a girl in a more-thanfriends way. Still, it was nice while it lasted.

A short time later, a white guy who was equally gorgeous walked by. This time, instead of imagining

Adam Van der Zwan / Opinions Editor

opinions@the-peak.ca

scenes of domestic bliss, my fantasies with him were lust-filled and X-rated. Both guys were equally sexy — and let’s be clear, if the first guy were to approach and embrace me, I would have no problems with any triple-X-rated acts. But lust simply wasn’t my initial thought with the first man like it was with the second.

This scenario caught me off

guard, and I began to do a little introspection. I realized that for the last little while I had been looking at white men differently than men of colour. I was completely sexually objectifying the white guys I found attractive, while the physical draw to the non-white guys had been only a part of my thoughts.

I’m not one of those guys who ‘has a type’ based on skin colour.

I've dated and slept with guys

from many different backgrounds, yet here I was realizing that skin colour was playing a direct role in my initial opinion of guys. Why? What was affecting my perception? The only thing I could think of was the porn I watch: it’s generally all white.

I find there is a saturation of white guys in gay porn. Even if you remove the “twink,” “jock,” or “boy next door” labels that we give different builds and genres, there is a proliferation of whiteness. A friend of mine laughed when I brought this up and suggested, “Maybe you're just watching the wrong porn?” That could be; there is a lot out there, even without the amateur or home videos that flood the net. Though, even if I try to find a more varied cast — and I did look — when I do see a guy of colour, the “thug,” “Asian,” or “interracial” tag typically takes precedence.

So, I’ve decided to stop watching porn for a while to see what happens. I’m guessing porn isn’t a bad thing to walk away from anyway, and I am past the point of being in a small town with no outlet except the Internet. Also, the porn we watch is not the sex we have, no matter how gorgeous you are. If all goes well in a few months, without the programming, I’ll be in the fantasy loft with all the guys — even the white ones.

Opinions

Being sexy for others is challenging. There are so many factors to consider, such as what others do and don’t find attractive, and what you’re comfortable with doing in the name of ‘sexiness.’

For lack of a better phrase, it’s a total fucking shitshow.

Walking into any La Senza, Victoria’s Secret, or Swimco can be overwhelming if you are just looking for a generic bra to get you through the day, or a bathing suit so that you can actually go to the beach for once.

You are bombarded, from the moment you walk in, by models with perfect bodies, and bras that will make you go up two cup sizes. Quite frankly, the whole process causes me to hyperventilate and become clammy — my mom can confirm this unfortunate reaction.

Sometimes, though, I decide to live a little and seek out something

July 18, 2016

that isn’t as practical — something sexy. Once I do this, all the usual shopping anxiety that I have being a bigger and bustier girl disappears.

I am in the clothing department to live my best life, societal expectations be damned. Shopping then becomes less about being sexy for someone else and more about being sexy for myself.

It’s so liberating, it makes me want to run around in lingerie and make the world my runway. I know I can’t do this, given that I would rather not be arrested, but I also don’t want the feeling to disappear, either.

Then I realize that I actually can make the world my runway: I just need to wear clothes overtop. My sexy feelings don’t melt away; if anything, they become stronger.

The thought of being able to wear more than just your standard bra and panties out in public when nobody

else knows about it feels to me like a shot of confidence and sexual empowerment. I feel sexy and I don’t care who looks at me — well, I do, but it seems like less of a big deal to have the creepy guy on the train smile at you when the cute guy behind him is clearly checking you out.

Feeling sexy isn’t just about bras

and bathing suits, though. Some days I’ll wear blue lipstick, or run around in a hoodie and sweatpants with unwashed hair, and I will feel the exact same as if I were wearing lace. There is something strangely comforting about being able to feel sexy while doing something that is viewed as decidedly unsexy.

Feeling sexy changes how I react

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and present myself to others — whether or not I want to sleep with them. I carry myself differently, treat people better, and I’m not afraid to seek out what I know I deserve.

This is why I gave up on being sexy for others and decided to be sexy for myself first. It makes me a better person, it makes me more confident, and most of all it makes me feel more

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Sometimes, when you’re in the heat of passion, feeling the urge to gnaw or bite your partner is a completely natural show of affection. Sex is about sharing intimacy — and if you’re having good sex, especially with someone with whom you have a true emotional connection, you might even feel oddly as if you want to be one with that person; as if two bodies bound together wasn’t quite satisfying enough.

It’s a strange, out-of-body sort of mentality that can be difficult to grasp if you haven’t experienced it yourself.

But typically, I find a byproduct of this deep, emotional intimacy is to bite your partner — as if you actually want to eat them.

It’s affectionate, it’s fun, it’s sexy, and it shows the person you’re with that you’re undeniably enjoying yourself.

While having sex, I’ve never ever felt the urge to scream at the top of my lungs.

I understand that we want to reassure our partners that we’re enjoying ourselves, but there are definitely other, more natural and realistic ways to express this pleasure.

I get that the Internet is loaded with people who wail while doing the deed until they lose their voice; many of us feel the need to replicate these behaviours to seem like we’re having a good

time in bed. But for me, nothing kills the mood faster than to have someone holler about a pleasure that just isn’t as strong as they’re making it out to be.

Perhaps I’m more of a romantic person, but screaming while in the sack feels impersonal. It takes away from the intimacy and sincerity of the bedroom, and immediately makes me think of some crude pornography that I honestly have no desire to be a part of.

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Opinions

“You are either straight or gay.” To some, that probably sounds like an offensive, or at least incorrect, statement. However, to many others, this statement rings true.

“Bi? No way, he’s just saying that for now. Give him a year and he’ll be out.” Maybe you, yourself, have heard this one before, or have even said it, without blinking an eye.

“Are you having lesbian sex?

Then you should read this sex health pamphlet!” This one is great, right?

Promoting healthy sexual practices and sex positivity! But the truth is, all of these statements are part of a large problem most people are not aware of: it’s called bisexual erasure.

Bi erasure is the tendency to ignore, remove, or falsify evidence of bisexuality in history, media, and everyday life.

Scholar Kenji Yoshino argues that there are a few key reasons why individuals would contribute to bisexual erasure; one being to categorize sexual orientation, so humans can only have one gender preference. People consciously or unconsciously deny the existence of bisexuals to avoid having their own sexual orientation questioned.

Fearing someone else's sexuality affecting how another identifies is one of the most

troubling aspects of bi erasure, and is the definition of homophobia. The fact that someone identifies as bi doesn’t discount your sexuality.

If I, a woman, have sex with another woman, I am not having lesbian sex because I am not a lesbian.

If I am in a relationship with a man, I am not in a straight relationship, because I am not straight. My orientation doesn’t change with who I am dating, fucking, or admiring. I am a queer bisexual woman, no matter how others perceive me.

This is why I am not bothered when my female friends make out with other women and still call themselves straight. Or when past boyfriends confessed multiple attractions to men and still called themselves straight. Or when proud

Adam Van der Zwan / Opinions Editor

opinions@the-peak.ca

queer friends call themselves lesbians even when they still have sex with men from time to time. The key is that it’s their identity and only they have the power to choose it — no one else.

What bothers me is when people try to define others’ sexualities or dismiss certain identities, and this is particularly a problem with bisexuality.

Sadly, bi erasure is still rampant.

Robyn Ochs, who was one of the first to marry a same-sex partner in the US, was called a lesbian despite identifying as bisexual. Other examples of bi erasure exist in our history textbooks, our media entertainment, and within our own social groups.

Erasure is even worse when it comes to the acceptance and representation of bisexual men. Personally, I find there is much more tolerance for bisexual women, and that bisexual men are often assumed just to be outright gay. Why is this?

We’ve heard this all before: we need more representation and more acceptance of minorities.

But with bisexuality being erased from society, these notions are a little different. We need to fully recognize that bisexuality exists and has always existed, and we need to let go of the fear that our own sexualities waver based on others’ identities.

I call myself bisexual. What do you call yourself?

Eighth grade me watched in amusement as the girl on the TV screen pushed her boyfriend away.

“Abstinence is the safest form of sex,” the narrator’s voice boomed through the speakers, and the message began to settle in the sex ed class. After high school, it stayed with me for a long time. For the next five years, “abstinence” was my automatic answer when someone asked about the safest form of sex. I realized only recently that masturbation might actually be the safest method of sex, and that abstinence is not a form of sex at all.

I realized this a few months ago, when I read someone’s rant on the Internet about abstinence. The author was complaining about the amount of focus abstinence gets in sex education, even though it’s not even a type of sex. Being abstinent means that a person won’t engage in sexual activity — with anyone, including themselves.

Doesn’t that disqualify abstinence as a sexual act?

Don’t get me wrong, I agree that abstinence is a great way to avoid both getting pregnant or catching an STI. A person won’t catch anything if they don’t have sex, just like they won’t get hit by a car if they don’t walk down the street.

But is there a way to relieve oneself of sexual thirst without being contaminated?

Uh, yeah: masturbation. I am shocked at how little we talk about masturbation as a safe sexual practice, because the simple matter of fact is that no one can catch a disease simply by masturbating, nor can they get pregnant. However, masturbation is still a type of sex, and it’s probably the only type of sex that is 100 percent STI-free.

Why, then, aren’t we talking more about masturbation in sex education classes?

Maybe it’s because many public school sex education programs are concentrated more on protection than pleasure. If there needs to be a conversation about abstinence, there doesn’t need to be a lot of talk about pleasure. Just don’t have sex. Conversation over.

If students follow these instructions, they’re safe. They won’t catch an STI, and they won’t be popping out babies. If they don’t want to follow the instructions, then they’re already educated enough on forms of sexual protection, so at least they’ll be safe. And masturbation? It’s an untapped resource just left on the sidelines.

As an enthusiastic supporter of sexual pleasure, I’m bothered by this. Learning about abstinence is helpful — it could be the right thing for some people, and it’s great that they will have this information. However, parading abstinence around as the only form of safe sex completely overlooks the fact that masturbation allows people to engage in safe sex.

I would love to see masturbation become more of a conversation topic in public school, and eventually be taught alongside abstinence as an option for those who are trying to avoid STIs and children. In the meantime, all we can do is argue about the state of our sex ed, and masturbate.

Diversions

Across 1. Macaroni, e.g.

6. Connecting words 10. Asian staple 14. Concerning 15. Skin bump 16. Object of adoration 17. Stop 18. Renter's rooms 20. Chef's measures (abbr.)

21. Moon feature 22. Tumult 23. Classic song 25. Summer, e.g.

27. Do again 29. Composition 31. Common verb 32. Southern beauty 34. Compact 38. Colt's mom 40. Valleys 42. Broker's advice 43. Biblical song 45. Musical pace 47. Guy's companion 48. Warning alarm 50. Spain's continent 52. India's Mother ____ 55. Gypsy's card 56. Out ____ limb (2 wds.)

57. Engraver 60. Quarrel 63. Determine for sure

65. Start of a Dickens title (2 wds.)

66. Takes to court 67. Starting bet 68. Iron or lead 69. ____ pilot 70. Bird's home 71. Highly skilled Down 1. Agreement 2. Lincoln and Vigoda 3. Daytime drama (2 wds.)

4. Scuffle 5. Had breakfast 6. Informed 7. Wine valley 8. Mild oath 9. Tension 10. Border

11. Notions 12. Owned apartment 13. Rock star ____ John 19. Tire pattern 21. Quoted 24. Dollop 26. Affirmative votes 27. Sloping walkway 28. Distinct times 29. Actress ____ Burstyn 30. Look 33. Tardy 35. Bargain 36. Smack 37. She, in Lyon 39. More 41. Asparagus unit 44. Tightwad 46. Belonging to us 49. Wicker 51. Decomposed

Maia Odegaard / Business Manager

July 18, 2016 maia@the-peak.ca

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52. French ____ 53. Follow 54. Speed contests 55. Belief 58. Sugar source 59. Successful songs 61. Envelope part 62. Touched 64. Baltimore time zone (abbr.)

65. Physicians' group (abbr.)

EVENTS AT (OR AROUND) SFU: JULY 18 — 22

25: MONDAY

26: TUESDAY

20: WEDNESDAY

21: THURSDAY

22: FRIDAY

27: WEDNESDAY

28: THURSDAY

29: FRIDAY

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12 Arts

Flaccid penises are awkward.

There really isn’t any other way around it. They just kind of hang there, flopping about in the breeze. But that really isn’t a good enough reason to not feature more full-frontal male nudity in film and TV. Full-frontal female nudity abounds in film and television.

Movies like American Pie, Not Another Teen Movie, and others from that same genre make plenty of dick jokes, but never actually bother to show one. They do feature more than their fair share of female nudity, though.

While I will admit that there have been plenty of shirtless guys and more than a few bums in these types of films, all of them suffer from a distinct lack of peen.

The first time I saw full-frontal male nudity on screen was

Jess Whitesel / Arts Editor

arts@the-peak.ca

when I was 12 (sorry, Mom). It was at a sleepover and we were watching The Good Girl. While the details are blurry, I remember seeing a naked Jake Gyllenhaal running across the screen with it all hanging out. It lasted

for maybe two seconds, but that moment was forever burned into my memory. In my young brain I was expecting that this was going to be some sort of normal occurrence in movies for adults.

I was very wrong.

When I watched Old School the next year, my expectation was rattled. There was a streaking scene that featured prominently in the film, but even with its Rrating, all you ended up seeing were some male bums. While this wasn’t disappointing per se, I was confused. This confusion has persisted until the present day.

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While there has been somewhat of a shift recently to show more frontal male nudity, the disparity still exists. So much so that if a film or TV show has a rating above PG-13, I just naturally assume that at some point I will be seeing naked women. I don’t have that same expectation for male nudity.

That is where the issue lies: the lack of equality in nudity. I am not saying to throw in an uncontextualized crotch shot to tick some sort of equality box, but it would be nice to see more male nudity on screen. It is something that happens in the real world.

Men don’t always wear pants, or in the case of Chris Evans in Not Another Teen Movie, whipped cream.

Whether this is related to the aforementioned awkwardness of

wangs, to the fact that there is a sexual bias in the industry, a lack of male comfort, or some combination of these factors it is hard to say. What is clear though is that the lack of on-screen full-frontal male nudity isn’t good for anyone. It confirms that the female body, unlike the male one, is considered a sexualized object, and even women in film and TV with a sense of agency and personality can be reduced to simply boobs and a vag. It also teaches young males that this is how they should view women, too.

This trend can also be seen as shaming the male body. There’s been a big push recently to assure people that vaginas and breasts are all beautiful and we should accept their differences, but there doesn’t seem to be a similar discussion surrounding the penis.

If anything, it just confirms that they are floppy and awkward, and shouldn’t be seen or talked about. But you know what else is awkward and kind of flops around? Boobs. Yet we see them and talk about them all the time.

So, next time you see a penis on screen, celebrate it. It may feel strange or seem awkward, but embrace it. It will be better for everyone — and maybe soon, we’ll stop seeing flaccid penises as awkward and instead see them as beautiful.

Arts

Sex on TV is not new, and it’s more common now than ever.

Still, finding shows that have a worthwhile plot and good sex can be tricky. Below are four fantastic TV shows, ranging in popularity level from ‘everyone has seen this’ to ‘this was a show?’

While I have seen and recommend all these shows, I want to preface this article with a content warning: most, if not all, of these series showcase something that may be triggering for certain individuals; watch with caution, and always do your research to make yourself aware of particularly upsetting episodes.

Orange is the New Black Unless you’ve been hiding from all media for the past three years, you’ve probably heard something about OITNB. For those who haven’t already binge-watched all four seasons, OITNB is based off the memoirs of Piper Kerman, a currently law-abiding woman who was charged and sentenced to a women’s prison for a crime she committed after college. The series itself follows the lives of main character Piper Chapman and several other characters before, during, and in some cases, after incarceration. The ladies of Litchfield Penitentiary explore many issues involving sex — from “edging” to phone sex, they’ve covered it all. While this past season was, in my humble opinion, way more upsetting than it needed to be, this series remains a must-see.

Jessica Jones A woman after my own heart, Jessica Jones is a total badass. She’s strong, independent, and buys liquor in bulk — insert heart-eyes emoticon here.

A sexual assault survivor, Jones

July 18, 2016

is attempting to start over as a private investigator when a ghost from her past begins to torture others as he once tortured her. One of the reasons to love this show is because you get to watch Jones become herself again by exerting control over her life, especially when it comes to sex. All the sex scenes in the series so far have been consensual, but this show could still be potentially triggering for several reasons. Be sure to check the Internet for specific trigger warnings.

Outlander I am 100 percent biased, because I love this show. The TV adaptation of the book series follows WWII combat nurse Claire Randall as she travels 200 years into the past and meets the rugged and insanely handsome highlander Jamie Fraser.

Claire has to battle with the knowledge of what is to become of the Jacobites in just two short years, while knowing she cannot tell anyone what history has in store for fear of persecution.

Claire and Jamie’s whirlwind romance features a lot of sex scenes — like, a lot — but also has a great storyline, plenty of humour, and genuine heart.

Rescue Me I doubt too many people know about this show — the finale aired five years ago — but it was so good. The series was created by Denis Leary, who also stars as its main character, Tommy Gavin: a New York City firefighter coming to terms with the aftermath of the 9/11 attacks. Suffering from PTSD and survivor’s guilt, Gavin turns to alcohol to cope with ghostly visions of his dead cousin, Jimmy. As the series progresses, it focuses more on the dysfunctional home lives of several firefighters in Gavin’s company. This show features many different types of sex, including one-night stands, tender lovemaking, and hate sex.

The first time I watched this show was with my mom, and I would not recommend watching this — or any of the above — with a parent.

She’s loud, foul-mouthed, and is the owner of a theatre whose crazy cast of burlesque dancers she calls family. But that description doesn’t do justice to Shine Mionne, the titular character of a burlesque musical that, while explicit, actually has a whole lot of heart.

The play is set in a rundown burlesque hall called the Aristocrat on the Lower East Side of Manhattan, a year or two after the 2008 market crash. In a desperate attempt to keep her place running, Shine (Cass King) takes out a loan from the bank that she is finding increasingly difficult to pay off, and is continually threatened with the inevitable gentrification of her theatre. When a

smooth-talking businessman named Richard Suit (Theo Budd)

offers to help her restore the place and run the show, Shine is forced to choose between saving the show from financial ruin or

13

continuing to run it the way she always has.

The musical had a shaky start, as it was plagued with technical issues (which continued throughout the night), and a band whose accompaniment sometimes overpowered the performers onstage.

As a result, its opening number, “This is How We Do it Downtown” was confusing and overwhelming at best. However, the plot quickly picked up pace and one couldn’t help but be charmed by the characters and the story. There was also a whole lot of nudity (with colourful tassels artfully placed in the right places) to keep us entertained in between.

“Shine is a story that acknowledges the existence of sex,” the show’s composer John Woods told The Peak. “It’s not gratuitous, it’s funny, hilarious, and speaks to sex.” There is no better description of the musical, as most of the characters aren’t shy about expressing their sexuality. The most hilarious number, “Blind,” performed by Frankie Avid and Allison Fligg, directly speaks to the power of horniness as they both proclaim that they want to “fuck [each other] blind.”

A standout character was the gorgeously voluptuous Lulu (Danielle Lemon), the star of Shine’s show, who turns people on with her incredible voice and sexy confidence. Lemon’s solo number, “Large and in Charge,” brought her powerful vocals and seductive prowess together in the best way possible.

As for Shine, Woods described her by saying, “She is a character that you don’t really see in any sorts of media; she’s a woman who misbehaves, but is still a hero. Shine is hard-drinking, loud-mouthed, and still gets to save the day.”

King gave an amazing performance, showcasing crass humour mixed in with intense v u l n e r a b i l i t y, proving that a character can be sexy and relatably human.

In essence, Shine stands out by being sexy yet down to earth, the perfect blend of fun romp and sentimentality. Go see it if you want a good laugh and opportunities to say a couple of “awwws.”

14 Humour

Justin Stevens / Humour Editor

humour@the-peak.ca

Alexa Tarrayo, Photo Editor

Jumping your partner’s bones has never been this fun.

Ty Knoll Peak Associate

Take that French maid fantasy to the next level.

Let’s face it: there’s nothing more natural than masturbation. Jerking it, beating the meat, choking the chicken — fellas, the reason we have so many euphemisms for masturbation is because it’s the closest thing to a sexual art form for us. Unfortunately, one risk of masturbating is being caught in the act, so here’s a step-by-step guide for you guys out there caught with your pants down.

Chances are, when caught in the act, you’re damn near close to ejaculation. The last thing you want to be remembered for is being that asshole who came on your parents, friends, roommates, etc. Your dong is a loaded stick of spermy TNT, so turn around quickly and let it fly, before your fertile frag explodes on an innocent bystander. It’s basic love-gun safety, gentlemen.

Now, this part’s trickier. Namely because the person walking in has probably already heard digitized exclamations of “You like this, you dirty whore” or “Fuck me harder, you big stud” coming from your laptop. However, the last thing you want the world to know is that you are an aficionado of the “Horny MILF Gets Gang-Banged By Eight Young Studs” trilogy. Hit that red X-button fast, and explain that the noises are an experimental feminist music piece or something.

One-up your relationship and soar to new heights.

NOTE: Matching ears and hat not included.

Make your sex life a little more intere-sting.

Kleenex is your best friend in this scenario, whether for wiping away your man goo or as a means of poorly covering up exposed genitalia.

Use as much Kleenex as humanly possible to explain away your masturbation as a case of cleaning. This solution is foolproof, unless your penis is already so hard that the Kleenex covering it looks like a mummified tent pole.

It's time to put those mental powers of yours to the test. You got a massive erection and you need to get rid of it fast. Just hitting your ding-a-ling while yelling “Go away, damn it!” simply isn’t enough (plus, it's pretty painful). Think of the biggest boner-killer as fast as you can, whether that be a crazy castrator chasing you with a knife or Khloe Kardashian. Bring down that erect Eiffel Tower by any means necessary!

Break new ground and pound that asphalt.

Alright, let’s be honest with ourselves: all the shit you did before this step won’t hide that you were actually masturbating. So it’s time to pull out your ace in the hole and blame everything aside from yourself and your actions. After all, it’s not your fault you have an account with Brazzers — those subscription offers were just too good to turn down!

If all else fails, fess up and admit you’re a lonely pathetic loser with no relationship prospects . . . and then do the same thing tomorrow.

Humour

He leaned in for a kiss. I did the same.

We embraced, and it was great — there’s something about geeky guys that really gets my blood pumping.

Our hands began to roam when suddenly his pants vibrated. I grinned and pulled back, about to make a lewd comment about a toy. He, however, pulled out his phone with excitement. “There’s one here!” He dismissed the notification, opened an app on his phone, and began to scan the room. “One what?” I asked.

I embraced him from behind, kissing his neck, trying to get the mood back, and looked down at his screen. He was playing Pokémon Go and was about to catch a Zubat that seemed to have been roosting in my closet. I’m all for bringing games into the bedroom, but this is a bit silly. Honestly, Pokémon Go has really puffed my jigglies.

July 18, 2016

I know this is another question of technology seeping into real life, and this isn’t an article about how tech is bringing about the downfall of civilization. This is more a commentary on how there are other balls I could be playing with, but the trainer is too distracted.

I’m not a luddite, I love my tech — in fact, I have had to avoid Pokémon Go because I don’t want my life’s goal to be finding a Squirtle (my love life is already like that, anyway). Nor do I think that no one should play this game. It's just a matter of timing. If I bring you to my hideout to show you my Helping Hand, the last thing I want is for you to be distracted.

I get that you gotta catch ‘em all. I get that it is fun. I get that you want to keep playing. All I am saying is if you put the phone down, you can catch my Slowpoke.

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16 Last Word

Tamara Connor / Features Editor

features@the-peak.ca