925B Peachtree St. NE, Suite 168 Atlanta, GA 30309 404.439.9838
PUBLISHERS
William Duffee-Braun william@peachatl.com
Mike Fleming mike@peachatl.com
ART
Tanner Gill
Art Director tanner@peachatl.com
SALES
Russ Youngblood
Senior Sales Representative russ@peachatl.com
Jim Brams jim@peachatl.com
Steve Tyrrell steve@peachatl.com
CONTRIBUTORS
Buck C. Cooke
James Hicks
Matthew Holley
Scott King
James Parker Sheffield
Chris Vizzini
DISTRIBUTION
Brian Harmon
“ I fought for my country. Now I ’ m bringing the fight to my HIV. ”
Reggie - Atlanta, GA
Living with HIV since 1985.
As a military guy, I know how to follow orders. So when my doctor told me to start and stay in treatment, I listened. Now my treatment regimen is part of my life. That means I take my pills, I keep my medical appointments, I stay connected to support groups and I keep up with the latest education. Treatment works for me, and now I show other veterans who are HIV-positive how it can work for them.
THE EMPATHY GAP
By Scott King
I HAVE BLACK FRIENDS. I HAVE WHITE friends. I have gay friends and straight friends and friends with benefits and friends with timeshares.
What I don’t have are friends who really aren’t so cool with the gays or the
Finding the beauty in someone very, very different from you.
blacks or, you know, whatever. But that makes sense, right? Or does it?
This one time at band camp, my friend from work who was really cool came to a party I was throwing and brought along
his friend whom he had warned me was a little bit “backward.” Dude walked into my party and said, “Hey y’all. My name’s so-and-so, and I’m straight.”
Instead of getting angry or territorial or, you know, snappy, I said, “Nice to
meet you! Would you like a shot?” We fed him tequila shots – while we downed what we told him was silver tequila, but it was actually water. Dear God. I’m sorry. I know that was real fuckin’ bad.
POSSIBLY BECAUSE OF THE TEQUILA, by the end of the night, boyfriend loved us and all gay people around the world. He wanted to point out the fact that we were gay, that that was okay, and that there were similarities between straight people and gay people.
You have to let people be themselves around you so they will tell you what they think. Then, if you want to, you can have a conversation. Giving people evil stares will not change the way they think. Neither will telling them that they’re wrong. Let it breathe, girl.
For example, when you come out to your family and friends, they have to come out, too. It becomes part of their identity to have a gay son or daughter, or friend.
Give them time. Give them space. Give them literature from PFLAG.
IT’S TRICKIER WHEN YOU’RE DEALING with hardcore subversive conservatives.
Anyone who intimidates you or threatens violence probably should not be engaged. But with people who just want to express how they feel about the world and Jesus and homosexual sodomy and lib’rals, give ‘em a chance. Especially if they’re cute.
I’m 6’3” and most times gender conforming, so a lot of unobservant people assume that this means I’m heterosexual. I don’t get harassed too much for looking or being different, unless people aren’t down with my rough trade punk rock vibe.
I don’t hide who I am or doublespeak or use ambiguous pronouns, but sometimes I can have a conversation with someone for three minutes without mentioning how hot a male celebrity is. My new, non-queer friend and I can talk about the way things are and learn something new about the world. It’s funny when you look into their eyes and you can tell that they really just want you to be yourself – and not judge them in return.
Before you start ranting about how that’s ironic because they’re judging everyone else, think about all the people you judge. It could even be a fellow
gay person who just doesn’t look right or act right or use the correct terminology when discussing a sensitive political topic. You feel like you have a right to judge because you’re in the right, but so does my new conservative friend.
THIS OTHER TIME AT BAND CAMP, I was walking home from the Megabus, and I was wearing a UT Vols football t-shirt that my family had gotten for me for Christmas. I was like oh girl I’ll walk down Peachtree and I’ll be a jock and everyone will give me the bro nod.
Walking down Peachtree on a Sunday afternoon means lots of tourists and straight people. I’ve never been hatecrimed more in my life than by the vicious stares for wearing the jersey of the wrong sports team. I would have been safer and in better company if I’d worn a rainbow striped t-shirt that said ‘I’m a BIG homo!’
When it comes to what matters, people just want to love you. When it comes to sports, politics, or religion, bitches wanna hate.
PHOTOS: Russ Youngblood
Summer’s here and the time is right for hitting the streets of Atlanta for good eats and laid back vibes. We felt all of that and more the moment we saw the perfect smile from this week’s Peach of the Week cover guy.
Photos by mimagephotography
Our 27-story high-rise in the heart of Tech Square features three levels of the most unique amenities in Atlanta (if not the U.S.!). Experience our stunning collection of features and imagine your life, optimized. Penthouse units will be available early 2018.
1/8 Mile Running Track
Heated Saltwater Pool with Resistance Lane
Membership-Class Fitness Center with Yoga Studio
Internet-Enabled Fitness Equipment and Outdoor Crossfit Stations
Hungry? Thirsty for some time with your gays? Drop in and belly up to some of our favorite bites in the gayborhood.
Everybody’s gotta eat, right? Whether up for specialties and themes, super low-key, or slightly more upscale, there are always plenty of options in Atlanta.
And with LGBT diners leading the charge, you don’t have to look far to find restaurants that are fabulous, delicious, and with gay and gay-friendly crowds.
It was difficult, and man are we full, but we winnowed down our list of favorite eateries to the top two-dozen. Dig in!
PEACH ATL EATS
By Mike Fleming
LA HACIENDA
If it’s not already, this Mexican eatery is about to become a regular stop on your restaurant rounds. Generous portions, a helpful staff and authentic flavors make this place a Midtown mainstay.
900 Monroe Dr. NE lahaciendamidtown.com
LAS MARGARITAS
Latin fare with a gay flair. On any given Sunday, brunch is hopping. And on most every day of the week, gay Atlanta’s own Oscar Valdivieso, aka Papi, is usually holding court over his popular eatery.
1842 Cheshire Bridge Road NE lasmargaritasmidtown.com
MOE’S SOUTHWEST GRILL
This local chain may be best known for what happens the moment you walk in. The chant of “Welcome to Moe’s!” isn’t just a gimmick; it’s an attitude that permeates your whole experience.
1544 Piedmont Ave. NE and all over town moes.com
NO MAS CANTINA
Known for its food and fun as well as hosting events as a member of the gay chamber of commerce, this Mexican food place is a gay mainstay.
180 Walker St. SW nomascantina.com
PAPI’S CUBAN & CARIBBEAN GRILL
Within steps of some and minutes of all the big gay bars, this place gives Holes in the Wall a good name.
216 Ponce De Leon Ave. NE papisgrill.com
ITALIAN
CAFÉ INTERMEZZO
Long a fave up the road in Buckhead, when this divine Euro-style coffeehouse hit Midtown, the gays swooned and swarmed.
1065 Peachtree Road NE cafeintermezzo.com
CAMPAGNOLO
Nothing says lovin’ like Italian food. On a date, sit inside with classics dishes, plus some special menu items that show you this gay-owned sister eatery to Henry’s knows what it’s doing.
980 Piedmont Ave NE campagnoloatl.com
FUN & CASUAL
JOE’S ON JUNIPER
Famous for its patio and a lively bar, this is also a don’t-miss for comfort food, easy eats, and as one of the Metrotainment family of restaurants, also home to amazing desserts.
1049 Juniper St. NE joesonjuniper.com
JOHNNYS PIZZA
New York Italian pizza so good you’d slap your mama. Whole pie or by the slice, the prices are great, too. Get a slice with one of their actually good side salads if you simply have to watch your figure.
1810 Cheshire Bridge Road NE johnnyspizza.com
ROASTERS ROTISSERIE
There’s no better place for chicken served any number of ways – roasted straight off the spit, fried in strips, fileted with toppings, or over a gigantic salad. All served with homespun sides and a side of loyal gay following any night of the week.
2770 Lenox Road roastersfresh.com
TAVERNA PLAKA
The hospitality and every-meal-asevent that the Greeks are known for is on full display at this popular eatery.
2196 Cheshire Bridge Road NE tavernaplakaatlanta.com
ROXX
A one-stop shop for American fare and a gay clientele. A popular patio, a menu of favorites from salad to meat-and-threes and beyond.
1824 Cheshire Bridge Road NE roxxfanclub.com
EINSTEIN’S
Raising the bar on gayborhood eats, this Metrotainment restaurant puts a creatve spin on Southern comfort classics. It’s big patio, ample bar, and weekend brunch are popular.
1077 Juniper St. NE einsteinsatlanta.com
HENRY’S
This gay-owned sibling eatery of nearby Campagnolo’s has the menu and the patio you’ve been craving.
132 10th St. henrysatl.com
LIPS CABARET
Come for the drag, stay for the food. OK the food and the drag. Dinner and a show finally answers your burning question about how, exactly, is life a cabaret.
3011 Buford Hwy NE lipsatl.com
RADIAL CAFÉ
Frank Bragg brought everything you used to love about him at Einstein’s, and everything you used to love about the original Radial – and bam! – created the best little breakfast, lunch and dinner spot south of Edgewood Ave.
1530 DeKalb Ave. NE radial.com
10TH & PIEDMONT
Serving seasonally inspired tapas for sharing, this place with a view of the city’s gayest corner and its rainbow crosswalks offers multi-cultural, borderless flavors and organic ingredients to execute global cuisine with a regional, Southern influence.
991 Piedmont Ave. NE communitashospitality.com
TAVERN FARE
AMSTERDAM
This sprawling gay bar complex has a little something for everybody, and that goes for its menu as well.
502 Amsterdam Ave NE amsterdamatlanta.com
BLAKE’S ON THE PARK
You may know it for its DJs, drinks and dudes, but you’re going to love its delicious dishes too, from starters to burgers to entrees and salads.
227 10th Street NE blakesontheparkatlanta.com
BURKHART’S
You’d be hard pressed to find a more delicious meal at these prices. Cooks are just on the other side of the bar ready to fix you full-course plates of man-that-hits-the-spot.
1492 Piedmont Ave. burkharts.com
THE COCKPIT
Grant Park’s best-kept gay secret is a great South-of-i20 haunt for our boys and men. Come for the guys, but stay for the tasty treats.
465 Boulevard SE facebook.com/arthurleedutton
WOOFS
Atlanta’s first and only gay sports bar makes its name on jocks and the guys who love them, but its kitchen has always been a big deal with entrees and sides that making watching the big game even better.
2425 Piedmont Road NE woofsatlanta.com
HAVE YOU MET MR. JONES?
‘80s trendsetter Howard Jones hits Atlanta with Retro Futura, new music and an inescapable legacy
By Gregg Shapiro
If the first acts that come to mind when you think of longstanding British new wave in the 1980s are The Cure, Depeche Mode and The Smiths, you’d be remiss if you left out one of the biggest influences, Howard Jones.
A musical presence since “New Song” was in rotation on the radio and on MTV in the early ‘80s, Jones lived up to the promise of that track with a series of unforgettable singles, including “What Is Love?,” “Things Can Only Get Better,” “Life In One Day,” “Everlasting Love,” and his biggest hit, “No One Is To Blame.”
Not one to sit on his laurels, Jones continues to make music to this day and hits Atlanta on Friday at Chastain. He chats here about his career, legacy, collaborations, and more.
In “New Song,” your first single as a solo artist, you sing “I don’t want to be hip and cool.” But you ended up a symbol of ‘80s music trends. Isn’t that ironic?
We were doing something different. We were using new technology. We were using video. It was new, and I guess, quite cool and hip [laughs]. But it wasn’t the intention to do that. It happened by accident.
There are echoes of ‘80s synth in EDM. Are there any of those artists with whom you might consider collaborating?
I really like an American artist called BT. I’m a huge fan of his, and I think he’s super talented and wonderful. Cerdri Gervais recently did a great remix of “Things Can Only Get Better,” which I really like.
Some of your biggest hits could be considered “advice” songs. What’s the best advice you were ever given?
I suppose one of the things you could say is that in those songs I’m probably talking to myself just as much as to anyone else. There’s a lot of sort of self-therapy going on there. For me, it was always reacting to something, rather than taking advice.
I always thought it was very important to be yourself and do what you do. It doesn’t matter what other people do. They do what they do. Only one person can do what you do. I don’t know where I got that philosophy from as a young person, but I definitely live my life like that.
You don’t want to be copying people. You want to be striking out in a new direction. That’s the way things move forward.
In addition old favorites, can Atlanta expect new work in your concert on Friday?
Yes. There’s new music from Engage. There’s also brand new music from the Eddie The Eagle film for which I wrote I couple of new songs. [The show] covers the whole career. I think it’s important to be playing new things that you’re doing, as well. It would be wrong not to play all the big hits. People really want you to do that; I totally get that, and I enjoy it.
Finally, the question that’s on people’s minds: Do you still think “no one is to blame”?
The way I try to live my life is that I am responsible for what happens in my life. I don’t look to blame other people and things outside of myself. It’s my life, it’s happening to me, I’m responsible. That still works. No one is to blame, except me [laughs].
Howard Jones plays Chastain Amphitheatre as part of the Retro Futura tour, which also includes Men Without Hats, the English Beat and Modern English on Friday, July 28 at 8pm howardjones.com
WHY DO SOME GAY MEN CHEAT?
A look at the key causes for why he says he loves you but is sleeping with him. Or all of them. And why you may be doing the same thing back.
By Matthew Holley
Stereotypes abound concerning gay men, but there is one that flies further than most others: Why is it so difficult for gay men to maintain a faithful, monogamous relationship?
This one can all too often be all too true.
Some men may get huffy about that little piece of honesty, but hey, facts are facts. Too many gay brothers have felt the sting of betrayal or actually been the stinger. We’re men, and that can mean we’re animalistic creatures with a formidable sex drive.
Consider the way of life that so typical of so many. There are thousands, even millions of gay men out there, all with a randy libido. Some may control it better than others, yet is it really that surprising, pardon the pun, that the body count of gay relationships is high?
So many of us can remove emotion from sex all for sheer physical pleasure, even if we’re also simultaneously head over heels, madly in love with our partner or boyfriend. These guys may be hard-pressed to resist the willing stud who just walked by and gave them the nod.
With today’s technology, these simple encounters are right at a gay man’s fingertips. All the apps like Grindr, Scruff, Jack’d and Tinder ease the process of sexual rendezvous. You can have a warm masculine body on top of you in minutes if he lives close by. Easy anonymous access isn’t very conducive to your otherwise healthy relationship.
Physicality isn’t the only reason your man may be stepping out. According to psychologist Dr. Weston Edwards, an expert on infidelity, men may cheat for the following reasons:
Goal oriented. Men are fixers, conquerors of the unattainable. “Sexual behavior can often times be a means to an end. This might be around survival sex; ‘I need a place to live,’ for example. It can include the “badge of honor” when a person can brag, ‘I had sex with that hot guy.’” It can also be about getting revenge or use of money and/or drugs.
Emotional validity. Sex is designed to bring partners closer, solidifying love and commitment. Dr. Weston says, “In our society, monogamy emphasizes this reason for having sex. So then, the lack of a satisfying emotional relationship may lead to sexual contact outside
the primary relationship. To be fair, in some cases, having an emotional connection isn’t limited to monogamous sexual relationships, and you will find plenty of men in so-called open relationships who do have emotional connection and satisfaction.”
Insecurity. Confidence and self-esteem is undeniably important to any man, and perhaps especially a gay one. We all know how judgmental we queens are, and if you catch your guy cheating these may be the excuses he throws out: “I feel so insecure, I needed to feel wanted.” “This hot guy was chasing me.” “I couldn’t say no.”
Every scenario is different, of course. These are just some of the common factors that plague most cheating relationships. When the right motivation presents itself, he or you may pull the trigger and act on the “what if” feelings you have been harboring.
So breaking it all down, instead of asking why we gay men cheat, maybe we can look internally and see if the real question is, Why do you cheat?
NEXT WEEK: Why some gay men stay with men who cheat.
5 THINGS ABOUT THE HOTLANTA CLASSIC
volleyball. Who knew? These guys did.
By Mike Fleming
Unlike softball, rugby, flag football and even swimming, the steady tide of gay jocks playing volleyball often flies under the radar. With 25 years worth of tournaments, that should change.
That’s right. For Hotlanta Volleyball Association celebrates the silver anniversary of its Hotlanta Classic this weekend. Members of the North American Gay Volleyball Association from across the US will descend on our town for some serving, volleying, jumping and spiking.
A whopping three-dozen teams, several of them from right here at home, will compete in three divisions on Saturday and Sunday in Forest Park, and spectators and cheerleaders are encouraged. Team names get creative, with contenders playing under monikers like Gold Diggers, Justice League, Sassitude, Carb Explosion, Hit That, RuBalls, Wonder Puss, Set on My Face, Shade Explosion, Pony Play, Bitch Perfect, and Breeding Rainbows.
Since it’s a lesser-heralded event to many Gay-TLiens other than to the participants themselves, we decided to do a rundown of the Big 5 Ws: Who, What, When, Where and Why.
WHO
NAGVA teams from Boston, New York, Pittsburgh, St. Louis, Baltimore, Cincinnati, Dayton, Nashville, Washington D.C., and Miami are set to flood the courts by day and our social spots by night. Be on the lookout for gay jocks you don’t recognize and give them a warm dose of Southern Hospitality.
WHAT
Well, duh. We repeat: Volleyball tournament, y’all! Tall nets, tall guys, tall order for your Saturday and Sunday sports watching pleasure.
WHEN
The 25th Annual Hotlanta Classic takes place July 29-July 30, all day. You know when else? Much of the summer you can join and play with Hotlanta Volleball Association. Visit hotlantavolleyball.org and facebook.com/HotlantaVolleyball
WHERE
The tournament takes place south of town on courts in Forest Park.
Tsunami Volleyball
5163 Old Dixie Highway Forest Park, Ga. 30297
WHY?
Guys, games and gays. Because sports!
Hotlanta Classic
If you liked Sing For Your Life a few years back, you’re going to love this addition from many of the same party people. Come knock back some drinks while solos, duets and groups move better than you ever will for cash prizes and a slot at the next Icon party.
SATURDAY, JULY 29 – SUNDAY, JULY 30
TSUNAMI VOLLEYBALL
5163 Old Dixie Highway, Forest Park | hotlantavolleyball.org
Wild Margarita Bust
When it comes to Hotlanta Softball Teams headed to the Gay Softball World Series, one team lives up to its name and reputation even more than most. The Atlanta Wild wants to show you a good time with bottomless margs while they raise money for their trip.
SUNDAY, JULY 30, 4PM
LAS MARGARITAS
1842 Cheshire Bridge Road NE | facebook.com/AtlantaWildSoftball
Frisky Monkey
The dance-beats of this duo are one of the jewels in gay Atlanta’s crown. In addition to the synthpop of Juan Cezar and Douglas Pettis, this show also features the wonders fo the band The Hollows so you can make a full night of it at Midtown’s live music spot.
SATURDAY, JULY 29
SMITH’S OLDE BAR
1578 Piedmont Ave NE | friskymonkeymusic.com
Tripps 19th Anniversary
It’s hard to believe it’s been nearly two decades since this unassuming neighborhood bar opened on Piedmont Circle and became a standard for dancing boys and a friendly crowd. Come celebrate like only these guys know how, plus a few anniversary specials and surprises.
SATURDAY, JULY 29
TRIPPS BAR
1931 Piedmont Circle NE | facebook.com
Shawn Mendez
The Canadian cutie who blew up YouTube and Vine in 2013 and made a name for himself with covers is now a bonafide star with a slew of hits. Now he hits Atlanta behind his Illuminate album while facing down yet another Top 10 hit with “Descpacito.” Get an eye and earful.
A snapshot of Gay Atlanta’s favorite destinations. View their ads in Peach ATL & visit their websites for weekly event listings.
MIXX
mixxatlanta.com
1492 Piedmont Ave NE
OSCAR’S
oscarsatlanta.com
1510 Piedmont Ave NE
EAST ATLANTA, GRANT PARK & EDGEWOOD
THE COCKPIT
thecockpit-atlanta.blogspot.com
465 Boulevard SE
MARY’S
marysatlanta.com
1287 Glenwood Ave SE
SISTER LOUISA’S CHURCH
sisterlouisaschurch.com
466 Edgewood Ave SE
SWINGING RICHARDS
swingingrichards.com
1400 Northside Dr NW
Dining
MIDTOWN
10TH & PIEDMONT
communitashospitality.com
991 Piedmont Ave NE
EINSTEIN’S
einsteinsatlanta.com
1077 Juniper St NE
FROGS CANTINA
frogsmidtown.com
931 Monroe Dr
G’S communitashospitality.com
219 10th St NE
HENRY’S henrysatl.com
132 10th St NE
JOE’S ON JUNIPER joesonjuniper.com
1049 Juniper St NE
LA HACIENDA
lahaciendamidtown.com
900 Monroe Dr NE
CHESHIRE
LAS MARGARITAS
lasmargaritasmidtown.com
1842 Cheshire Bridge Rd NE
ROXX
1824 Cheshire Bridge Rd NE
ANSLEY
COWTIPPERS
cowtippersatlanta.com 1600 Piedmont Ave NE
DEKALB
LIPS ATLANTA atldragshow.com
3011 Buford Hwy NE
Retail
MIDTOWN
BARKING LEATHER AFTER DARK barkingleather.com
306 Ponce De Leon Ave NE
CHESHIRE
BARKING LEATHER barkingleather.com
805 Lambert Dr NE
SOUTHERN NIGHTS VIDEO 2205 Cheshire Bridge Rd NE
ANSLEY
BOY NEXT DOOR MENSWEAR boynextdoormenswear.com 1447 Piedmont Ave NE
GCB & PLEASURES brushstrokesatlanta.com 1510 Piedmont Ave. NE
Fitness
MIDTOWN
URBAN BODY FITNESS urbanbodyfitness.com
500 Amsterdam Ave NE
CHESHIRE
GRAVITEE FITNESS graviteeatl.com 2201 Faulkner Rd NE
MIDTOWN
FLEX SPA flexspas.com
76 4th St NW
CHESHIRE
MANIFEST 4U
manifest4u.org
2103 Faulkner Rd NE
Andouille Sausage
Pigs in a Blanket
Corn Dogs
Corn on the Cob
Cucumbers
Two boiled eggs
Carrot
Hot Dog
The next time I want lip from you, I’ll sit on your face.
When you start with ‘I don’t know anything about this,” please please please don’t follow it with “but.” You are done.
I pieced together all the whiny, insipid, cliché and shaming Facebook posts, and now Taylor Swift wants her song back. Some guys are the spine, and others are the shiver that runs through them.
I love you, baby, but there’s no “we” in tater tots. Why is the laziest person the loudest about how busy they are?
Whatever you do, don’t give up, because all you can do after that is bitch. And we all know what that looks like. If you’re not helping to make it right, stop complaining about it being wrong.
ARIES (Mar. 21 - Apr. 19)
You can hardly help but to push too hard. Hitting a limit in your efforts with your partner (at home or at work) will help you clarify your capacities. It can also be a make-or-break time for the partnership.
TAURUS (Apr. 20 - May 20)
The longer you keep smoothing things over at home, the bigger it will backfire. Resentments and anger will come out so face them squarely and deal with them. It’s not so bad. With forthright honesty it can actually work out very well.
GEMINI (May 21 - Jun. 20)
With your ruler Mercury turning direct, expect everything you’ve been wanting to say to be heard. So will a lot that you wanted to keep under wraps. You think you can handle the fall out yourself, but you really do want some help!
CANCER (Jun. 21 - Jul. 22)
As much as your dreams do come true, resist the impulse to fret over those that don’t. Be mature and constructive with what you have. There’s a difference between dedication and stubbornness. Focus on your long-range goals.
LEO (Jul. 23 - Aug. 22)
Friends mean well with their promises. Try to be kind and forgiving when they don’t come through. Perhaps, just maybe you were expecting more than they were offering? Be careful not to reveal sexual secrets, unless you want to create some more.
VIRGO (Aug. 23 - Sep. 22)
Worries that have been lurking in the back of your mind are moving to your mouth. For your own sake, and everyone else’s, be careful who you share that with. Conversations with your partner can open up problems that need work. Roll up your sleeves!
LIBRA (Sep. 23 - Oct. 22)
The velvet glove isn’t fooling anyone. Everyone sees your iron fist. Go easy on yourself and everyone around you. A long, deep heart-to-heart with a trusted friend, or even a therapist, can get you back in balance.
SCORPIO (Oct. 23 - Nov. 21)
Life feels like trying to win the Indy 500 with your parking brake on. If you let it, the tension will only get worse and worse. Consult with a spiritual (or psychological) authority. You really need to work hard on letting go.
SAGITTARIUS
(Nov. 22 - Dec. 21)
There will always be a part of you that wants to be somewhere else. Don’t let that stop you from settling in with the one you love. Partnership is an adventure that will test you, push you and teach you more than world travel.
CAPRICORN (Dec. 22 - Jan. 19)
You’re pushing ahead harder in your endeavors, but something’s holding you back. Distinguish between necessary structure and dead weight. Advice from your partner could make life easier. Don’t be too proud to listen!
AQUARIUS
(Jan. 20 - Feb. 18)
Don’t get ahead of yourself. You can master the great ideas, but you need to start from the basics. That might mean reviewing what you think you know and finding new approaches.
PISCES
(Feb. 19 - Mar. 20)
Recent problems can feel overwhelming, but answers and order will come soon. Intuition is a better friend than logic, although you do need both. Just keep asking yourself: What’s the mature, responsible thing to do?
HOOKING UP IS HARD TO DO
Hey, Daddy!
What is the deal with Millennials? I was in a 10-year relationship that ended, and I’m back on the dating scene in my 40s, well at least back on the tricking scene. Either things have changed, guys have changed, or I have changed. Maybe all three.
Rather than dating seriously, I thought a little fun with younger guys not ready to settle down would be more my speed. Boy was I wrong. One guy was hot the first time, a mess the second. Another I’m working on but he is proving elusive. There are tons of guys on Grindr, Jackd and Scruff, but they’re too interested in being chatted up.
It’s so much work! I remember my younger, sluttier days with fondness, but I deserve a medal for all the time I put into these men. Was it always this hard? Where do my longtime single friends find the time the energy? I just want the sex without the hassle.
Always Games, I Never Guessed
Dear AGING:
Life is hard. If you deserve a medal, everyone deserves one, and I don’t do Millennial Participation Medals. You get a GenX Middle Age Cookie – sweet, but not enough to spoil you.
You probably just forgot, but tricking is a full time job. You have to prioritize it, make time for it, and keep at it. Maybe it’s lost its luster because after a real relationship, the payoff doesn’t look as good as it used to – in the pursuit or the prize.
For some guys, the actual trick is less the draw than the chase. Others tell themselves they’re looking for a boyfriend, or play other mind games on themselves to keep up the investment in random flings to avoid the difficult stuff of meaningful engagements. Maybe this used to be you, but you’re older now.
You say you don’t want the hassle, but Millennials are all about the hassle. It’s not their generation, but their age. It’s all new to explore and experiment with flirting, tricking and dating for them, just like you before your long-term relationship.
But I get it. Everybody understands a no-strings orgasm. Sex without any hassle at all is called porn.
Hey, Daddy!
I’m 25 and love a hookup. I’m not interested in playing house but playing the field. How can I avoid guys who want commitment and entanglements?
Always Games, I Never Guessed
Dear FREE:
My best advice is always the simplest: Communicate. The same conversation in which you tell what you want to do to each other, you gauge his interest in more than sex. If you don’t match up, be willing to throw him back and fish for another catch.
DADDY LOVES HIS BOYS
He knows the answers you need, and you’re going to get them. Reach out to him with your burning questions via our editor, Mike@PeachATL.com.
Warning: Advice given in this column is intended for entertainment and novelty purposes. Please proceed at your own risk.
