Module 5 THE IMPORTANCE OF LANGUAGE

MODULE 5: THE IMPORTANCE OF LANGUAGE

Language is a socially shared symbolic tool that we use to communicate our thoughts as well as represent our cognitive processes. Language is the way in which we communicate how we conceive our world. The language that we already have programmed in our brains forms the parameters of our experience. If we do not have a framework for something, then it is more difficult to perceive it consciously. Language helps to focus our attention on specific aspects of the world. When we focus on one thing, we take our focus away from something else.

Because all hypnosis is self hypnosis, we all walk around hypnotizing ourselves with out thoughts all day long. The repetitive thoughts, words and physical states that we access habitually program the brain to know "who we are".

Become highly aware of your client's communication patterns is key to uncovering what is happening underneath the surface.

LANGUAGE AND THE BRAIN

When two neurons respond to a language, they form chemical and physical pathways to each other. We feel this connection as an emotion in the body. These CONNECTIONS are STRENGTHENED (synaptogenesis) or weakened (synaptic pruning) depending on how often they are co-activated.

Hebbs law: “neurons that fire together, wire together”

This is the basis for all learning, and it can be seen in the formation of gray matter (where neurons communicate with each other) and white matter (fatty tracts connecting gray matter regions).

Our perception of the world is shaped by our culture and our exposure to its language and communication patterns. There are 7000 languages on the planet and each of them has its own way of relating to things concrete and abstract. Language will affect the way that we perceive emotion, gender, and even color.

HIMBA TRIBE OF NAMIBIA

Studies with the Him tribe have shown they cannot distinguish green and blue easily. Most subjects were unable to spot the difference, while some could identify the blue square but took longer than average to do so. But a similar circle composed of green squares was shown to the tribe, with one of the squares a different hue of green. They spotted it instantly because the different hue is named a different color in that tribe. The experiment seems to support the idea that naming a difference makes it easily perceptible to the spectator.

COMMUNICATION

There are four types of communication styles.

1. Spoken language-formal and informal. Pay attention to how the clients tone and language changes with topics or situations. When a client becomes aware of negative SPOKEN language in their day to day, it becomes easier for them to identify what the core negative belief may be that is driving their unwanted results.

Words like "can't", "always", "never", and "should" are just some examples of language patterns that clients can be coached to reframe in the moment that they hear them come out of their mouths.

2. Non-verbal language-How one holds their body and how one moves. Body language can help us to measure the level of engagement a client has in the process of hypnosis. During the session as well as the interview process, watch for body cues that tell you that the client is resistant to what you are saying. If their arms and/or legs are crossed, it may mean that they are not aligned with what you are saying. If you notice that they begin to lean away from you, retrace your steps, you may have said something that they do not believe to be true or that they are against. Try reframing what you said with different language and also asking the client what they may be in resistance to

3. Written language-Typically more thought out. Can give insight into other perspectives of thought. Journaling after a coaching session is a good practice to

encourage your clients to get into the habit of. Journaling allows them to explore their thoughts deeper with the understanding that the writing is for them. Many times after they journal they will have new insights that weren't available to them during the live coaching session due to nerves or surprise. As part of journaling, using homework assignments is an essential part of deepening the skills/insights you worked on during the session.

4. Intra-personal communication-the way we speak to ourselves. Occurs within the mind. The way that a client speaks to themselves and the thoughts they spend their energy on are clues to what is really going on. Asking them to share with you what they are thinking when they go quiet in session can show you what they think before they are able to make it “presentable". Listen for: self criticism, obsessive thoughts, patterned thoughts, intrusive thoughts, judgements of others and situations.

BASIC LANGUAGE PATTERNS TO MASTER

Have you ever said something like “I can’t do that” and had some clearly well intentioned friend/colleague/parent/stranger quote Henry Ford to you: “Whether you think you can, or think you can’t, you’re right”. Although Mr. Ford was right, sometimes moving from “I can’t” to “I can” seems as monumental as crossing the Gulf Of Mexico on arm floaties. It’s also not always appropriate. If I tell you I can’t go to dinner with you tonight, changing to “I can go to dinner with you tonight” may get me into a situation that I don’t want to be in.

Reframe examples:

I can’t: Places the decision making power on an outside source. Accesses the emotion of powerlessness.

Instead use

I won’t/I don’t: Communicates choice to the listener. Accesses emotions of power. Brings the responsibility of the decision back onto oneself. Because some statements wont make sense with I won’t you can also use "I don’t”. For example instead of “I can’t remember” say “ I don’t remember”

I have to OR I need to: Places the control over our actions on an outside source. Communicates to the body that I feel powerless and that I am under the control of something else.

Instead use

I get to: Gives us a clearer perspective of what is available to us. Communicates to the body that we are grateful for what we are able to experience.

Time-bound language

“Time is basically an illusion created by the mind to aid in our sense of temporal presence in the vast ocean of space. Without the neurons to create a virtual perception of the past and the future based on all our experiences, there is no actual existence of the past and the future. All that there is, is the present.”-Abhijit Naskar

When we speak about experiences, time may be essential for understanding. "Yesterday I went to the grocery store" or "Next week I am going on a trip". When we speak about our habits and personality traits, it is best to define time more concretely.

Your brain has been trained to think in terms of time lines.

Always and Never: Allows the brain to create the expectation that the future will be as you express. Communicates to the body that I feel powerless over any different outcome or destined to be different in the future.

Instead use

Sometimes: Allows the brain to create clarity around the frequency of your thoughts/ emotions/behaviors. Gives you room to make mistakes without harsh judgment. Allows for options in familiar experiences.

or

In the past: In the past creates a clear separation of one feeling/behavior/result from a new one. Comparison is part of how we judge the world so we can understand it and our role in it. Trains our brain that we are creating something new.

Other language to look for

• I want/I need: Asserts that that which they aim for is not available.

• Should: Implies responsibility being transferred to another (they should) or guilt as a motivator (I should).

• I will try: Implies indecision and non-commitment. I either will or will not.

• I know: Prevents further coaching.

• I don’t know: prevents further inquiry and solution-based thinking.

• I am: creates identity patterns in the brain. use feelings based communication or time line to clarify.

During the relaxation, induction and suggestive phases of a hypnosis session, it is important to keep your language simple and easy to understand. Using the clients own words and internal representational systems will help them to feel comfortable and will allow your suggestions to be adopted easily. Matching the clients’ positive word tracks and helping them reframe their negative word tracks can have a huge impact on they results. Hypnosis is, after all, the use of language to reprogram thoughts and behaviors.

Different people process information differently. Although in most instances there exists a combination of visual, auditory, kinesthetic factors, some people tend to lean of one of these more than others to process their experience. We will cover this in detail in another module.

It is useful to listen carefully to the clients speech for clues on how to help them adopt your suggestions.

Example of visual words/phrases:

I see short-sighted looks like crystal clear take a peek

insight in plain sight any color

Example of auditory words/phrases: I hear you clear as a bell loud and clear get an earful outspoken tongue-tied tuned in/tuned out express myself

Example of kinesthetic words/phrases:

come to grips with get a handle on sharp as a tack

firm foundation pull some strings I feel I'm touched

Positive Self Talk

Reframing negative self talk into positive words and phrases is essential to post hypnotic success. When you hear phrases that begin with “I am”, listen for what follows. If the client easily defaults to negative self associations, challenge them to replace them with positive or at a minimum neutral words. For example, “I am so tired of feeling like this” can be re-stated to “I am so ready to feel happy”. Other common phrases are "I can't" and "I have to" which can give the client a great sense of power and control when reframed to "I won't" and "I get to". As all hypnosis is self-hypnosis, coaching the clients on reframing their own language will assist them in experiencing permanent changes.

Conditioning & repetition

Conditioning clients to respond to hypnosis is crucial to success. Through conditioning, we make a series of ideas or things acceptable to the subject's subconscious mind. The nature of hypnosis is to be repetitive. We hypnotize ourselves all day with our words and thoughts. Repetitive suggestions, when under a trance state, by-pass what is common and accepted in the subjects mind.

Affirmations

Writing and practicing affirmations is a good way for clients to support themselves when not in session. A homework of daily practice can be recommended. When affirmations are combined with meditation, the results are even more powerful and much faster.

Essential language within the sessions • “All sounds, inside or outside of this room” • “There is no right or wrong way to do this, there is only your way” • “Whether you see it clearly or imagine it is perfect” • “This is easy and natural for you” • “Every day in every way I am getting better and better”

Module 5 notes: