IT AIN’T EASY BEING A PARALEGAL

by Pamela Starr

Being a paralegal is challenging –no matter what area of law you’re in. We are the holders of knowledge and guardians of the gate with mystical abilities, many times undervalued and underpaid.

Whether traditional paralegals or freelance/virtual/contract paralegals, we know every day will have its “Srsly?!” moments.

I submit the following for your consideration:

THE DISCLAIMER IS THERE FOR A REASON

It had been a quiet afternoon and I was catching up on admin and drudge work.

YOU’VE GOT MAIL! The subject line referred to an upcoming hearing in bankruptcy court. Yay, my forte! Ms. Starr:

I really enjoyed your web site, truly texan. It conveyed that you are good at what you do and there is no doubt that you speak your mind.

Not to waste your time, I am NOT an attorney. I am a small [businessman]. I am asking for your recommendation.

Can you recommend a paralegal that could attend a bankruptcy Hearing being held --- Thursday --- [in] Houston Texas (see attached)? (The attachment was a Chapter 11 341 Notice)

The execution of a Settlement with the Debtor is possible. The person would need to be a notary.

Also would like to know what the anticipated charge for their services will be.

OH! THE HUMANITY!

I wanted to speak my mind; hit him with both barrels. Instead, I shared the redacted email on Facebook. My high school crush posted:

“I fixed the error. The author wrote ‘texan.’ Who doesn’t know that ‘Texan’ is always capitalized??”

One of my bankruptcy attorney colleagues quipped sarcastically:

“I also like the part where he wants the person practicing UPL to attempt to collect on a debt by “settling” it, because that’s not a stay violation.”

I crafted and sent my response:

“I’m flattered you like my site and my style. I am good at what I do, which is why I recommend you hire an attorney. You need one – especially in a Chapter 11. Paralegals are not permitted to work for non-attorneys – even in Texas.

It would be unethical for me to suggest another paralegal provide services that fall under the umbrella of practicing law. Even if a freelance paralegal were to attend the Meeting of Creditors ‘on your behalf,’ (s) he would only be allowed to report what was said – not answer questions or interpret the facts and, most definitely, not permitted to ‘represent your interests’ regarding a settlement.”

‘NUF SAID? RIGHT?

WRONG! He emailed and left a voicemail.

I checked the voicemail transcription (useless). I listened to the message. Then I listened to it again. And again. And again.

Here’s the redacted transcription:

“… you know I think I have a solution um the person that you recommend could just work for the ----- law firm for ----- he’s an attorney so you can just send the bill to the ---- law firm and uhm you know uhm that way it gets by the idiosyncrasy that you um mention, but basically we don’t need any representation or anything we just need somebody to just go there, be there and pick up any paperwork that needs to be picked up or you know um and if there’s anything … because they’ll be a report that the court will give as to you know what happened but we just want somebody there just to pick up stuff or to be there and report back you know exactly what happened and not technical law to make any representation on our behalf so anyway thought you’d work for the ---- law firm or whomever you’d recommend and I I think I sent you an email that person’s address thank you very much thank you very much…”

And the somewhat less offensive (also redacted) email:

I have lost a great deal of money to the person who is declaring bankruptcy. I made my money and try to spend it wisely. I do not need an attorney for this matter on Thursday. All I need is for a person to report back and pick up any related paperwork the court hands out. And possibly witness the execution of a document(s).

I have an attorney with ----- Law Firm here in ----- that is advising me. The ----- firm is one of the oldest most respected firms in ---. Allow me to redirect your attention to the voicemail:

‘UHM THAT WAY IT GETS BY THE IDIOSYNCRASY THAT YOU UHM MENTION’

IDIOSYNCRASY??????!!!!!! To borrow from Inigo Montoya: I do not think it means what he thinks it means.

An end run around the law with complete disregard for everything I stand for ... INCONCEIVABLE!

So many potential ethical violations … I tell myself to keep the response plain and concise. It wasn’t easy.

If you’ve read anything I’ve written or about me, you know 1) I won’t budge on this issue – it’s not an idiosyncrasy, it’s the law; and 2) there is no ‘work around’ in which I allow an individual to hire StarrParalegals but bill a law firm for my time.

If ---- is a bankruptcy attorney licensed to practice in the Southern District of Texas bankruptcy court and wishes to discuss the possibility of the ---- firm hiring my company, he can call me to discuss. Otherwise, this conversation is over.

It took him 2 hours to reply with his perceived loophole:

Please know that I carefully read what you wrote, which was, “If a freelance paralegal were to attend the Meeting of Creditors ‘on your behalf,’ (s)he would only be allowed to report what was said.” Sending a report and picking up any hands out is all that is being asked of the paralegal. I can have a Wells Fargo bank teller witness and notarize a signature if needed.

Your involvement, or the name of a respected associate would be appreciated.

What part of “conversation over” is so difficult to understand?? You read the words but misinterpreted the intent. I chose “if” and “were” to convey the unlikelihood of such event ever taking place.

I repeat, it would be unethical for me or any paralegal to provide services that fall under the umbrella of practicing law. It is not my job to educate you or your ‘advising attorney’ in the nuances of UPL.

I will not involve my company in this matter, nor will I ‘refer you to a respected associate.’

End of discussion.

THE INTERNET WILL EAT YOUR EMAIL

A call came in from a non-attorney who claimed he was helping ‘his’ attorney find someone to e-file appellate pleadings. I told him I could do that for the attorney. The conversation quickly devolved, and I found myself in the Twilight Zone: • The attorney withdrew from the case because he did not have the capacity to e-file. • ‘We’ need to hire you to e-file for the attorney because ‘we’ don’t have access to email • I think he has a computer. • ‘We’ want you to receive the notices and call the attorney to tell him what to do next.

No email in the 21st century? It couldn’t be true. I asked; he explained why he/they didn’t have an email account: • “The Internet will eat your email if you don’t use the account regularly and my email account is gone.” • “No. I don’t actually remember my email address.”

I reiterated that I would need to speak directly to the attorney to discuss my contract and the case. The caller said he’d get back to me. That’s when the crazy got crazier –

The Internet challenged non-attorney called back claiming to have a letter from ‘his attorney’ authorizing me to be the paralegal on the case and giving me permission to take direction directly from the client.

‘Sir, that’s not how it works. Your attorney needs to contact me; we’ll discuss his needs; I’ll draft my contract and he will execute and return it.’

Caller: ‘Well, how does your contract differ from this letter?’

‘Aside from the fact that it isn’t a contract, and it is written to circumvent the requirement that any work I do must be supervised by an attorney, well, pretty much everything.’

Caller: ‘Then you need to MAIL me a copy of your contract so I can review the terms to see if I approve them.’

‘No sir, that isn’t how it works.’

Caller: ‘Well, yes, it is – I will be hiring you and the attorney, and I will be paying you directly.’

COMMENCE HEAD BANGING

‘No sir, you hire the attorney who will then subcontract to me. The attorney will direct my involvement in the case. I will bill him for my time, and he will include that in his bill to you. I will not accept payment from you.’

Caller: ‘But I’m the one hiring you.’

‘No. You don’t seem to understand the dynamic. And I’m still baffled that the attorney ‘doesn’t have access to the Internet.’’

Caller: ‘Why should he? That’s why I want to hire you. You will e-file and according to the guidelines from the court, you will be cc’d on all emails. When those emails come in, you need to call the attorney and tell him that something has come in and MAIL him a copy.’ ‘Sir, it doesn’t work that way. The e-filing account must be created using the ATTORNEY’S email address and bar number. He will be receiving the same email that I receive as a cc. The bar number and registration serve as his signature on the filings.’

Caller: ‘Fine, I will get you his bar number and you can create the account.’

‘You really don’t understand how this works, do you? The attorney MUST have his own, LEGITIMATE email account. There is no universe in which I will create an email address for your attorney@mycompanyname.com. For any of this to work, your attorney must have an active email account and Internet access.’

Caller: ‘Why would we need YOU then? If the attorney is going to do the work …’

PAGING ROD SERLING

‘Let me try to explain this again from my perspective – I work for attorneys. Period. An attorney must execute my contract before I will do any work for him/her on any project. The attorney tells me what needs to be done and I do it. For your purposes, you need someone who knows how to e-file. The attorney will draft and sign the pleading and email it to me. I will vet the pleading for formatting and confirm it has all the pages and attachments; then I will log into the system – using the attorney’s login information – and e-file the document(s). Once filed, I’ll download the e-filing confirmation and filestamped copy and email them to the attorney.’

Caller: ‘Why can’t you just MAIL it to him??’ ‘BECAUSE THE MOST BASIC REQUIREMENT FOR ANY OF THIS TO WORK IS THAT THE ATTORNEY HAS INTERNET ACCESS AND AN EMAIL ADDRESS.’

Caller: ‘I don’t understand why you find this so objectionable. How hard is it for you to call the attorney and tell him that something was filed and then MAIL him a copy??’

LAWD, HELP ME! THE LUMP ON MY HEAD IS EGG-SIZE

‘Well, let’s see – you are trying to put me in a position where I am working for you, not the attorney. At the very least, it is an ethical conundrum for me. I’m not a lawyer – ‘

Caller: ‘I know that.’

‘<sigh> I’m not a lawyer, I do not practice law, nor do I work for non-attorneys. To do so puts my entire career in jeopardy. Furthermore, it is impossible for me to wrap my head around the concept of an attorney without Internet access or an email address.’

Caller: ‘But the court says that in recommends that a paralegal or secretary be cc’d – ‘

‘Do you understand what a ‘cc’ is?’

Caller: ‘Yes, a carbon copy. You receive the email, call the attorney, print and mail him a copy.’

THE LUMP ON MY HEAD IS THE SIZE OF A POMEGRANATE.

‘No. The attorney will receive the SAME EMAIL with the same attachment. It is up to him to monitor his email account and be responsible for the case.’

Caller: ‘Again, I ask, why would we need you if he is expected to do all the work?’

DID I SAY POMEGRANATE? CANTALOUPE . .

‘Because it’s his job to practice law and represent you. I don’t understand why you want to waste time and incur the added expense of my time to open and print a document that he will have received as the primary on the e-filing account and then MAIL it to him for review. This is a paperless system. The only reason the court recommends a cc is if there is a technical failure or the attorney is out of the office for a prolonged period of time.’

Caller: ‘Well, he is out of the office all the time and he would need you to call him to tell him about the email and take care of everything.’

MALPRACTICE ANYONE? UPL?

‘It really doesn’t work that way. He needs to have an email account that he monitors. He is the responsible party . . . not me.’

Caller: ‘So I guess I need to meet with him tomorrow and have him contact you to see if this will even work.’

‘That would be the best place to start.’

Caller: ‘How do we get a copy of your contract?’

‘I’ll draft it AFTER I speak with the attorney and email it to him to review and execute.’

<You know where this is going now, right?>

Caller: ‘Why can’t you just MAIL it to me??’

SO, HOW WAS YOUR DAY? PAMELA J. STARR, CBA, J.S.M. MATD is a paralegal, writer, blogger, speaker, mentor, instructor, and the owner and paralegal extraordinaire of StarrParalegals, LLC where she’s been helping lawyers lawyer better since 2008. She’s a certificated and certified paralegal with a Master of Science of Law (2012) and a Master of Arts in Training & Development (2016).

When she’s not running her empire, Starr serves as NFPA’s Ethics Board Chair and Co-Chair of the Ad Hoc Committee for a Position Statement on UPL & Rogue Paralegals, trains the next generation of paralegals as an Adjunct Professor of Paralegal Studies at Yavapai College (AZ; online), blogs as her alter-ego Pamela the Paralegal, and provides Career Mitigation© services to transitioning professionals at Sessions with a Starr.

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