OutWrite Newsmagazine (Fall 2012)

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BDSM FEMME INVISIBILITY OBAMA

FALL 2012

CONTENTS 3

Letter From the Editor

4

What Are You Into?

5

I’d Like My Eggs Without Ovaries

6

Under the Influence

7

Ain’t No Homo Makin’ it to Heaven

8

We Barack-ed the Vote, Now What?

9

Femme in the Streets, Queer in the Sheets

10

IF IT HURT S , D O I T H A R D E R A LOOK INTO THE BDSM COMMUNITY

13

The Ship Has Sailed THE QUEER COMMUNITY ’ S RELATIONSHIP WITH FANDOM

14

The New Normal is Un-Queer

15

Lights Out QUEER SEX ON TV

16

Find Your Next Hookup Here

17

Sex Sells INSIDE C HI C HI L A R UE ' S , A W E H O

18

What’s Your BDSM Role?

20

Horoscopes |2

SEX SHOP

OutWrite is UCLA’s queer and ally newsmagazine. OutWrite, formerly called TenPercent, was established in 1979 and was the first LGBT collegiate newsmagazine in the nation. OutWrite is an alternative multi-platform media outlet that deals with the issues that matter to young, engaged Queer or LGBTidentified individuals, both at UCLA and beyond. By illuminating topics that are not covered by the mainstream media, and by doing so with a distinctive, frank, passionate and progressive voice, we strive to engage our community and ser ve their needs through dialogue and active expression. The UCLA Communications Board has a media grievance procedure for resolving grievances against any of its media. For a copy of the complete procedure, contact UCLA Student Media at 310. 825. 2787. Copyright 2011 ASUCLA Communications Board

Letter from the Editor When I became the new Editor-in-Chief of Outwrite, I was most excited to write about things that felt personal. Yes, I want to research and learn more about people and ideas that I do not know much about, but I knew I wanted our staff to discuss ideas that had deeply affected me throughout my life, with the belief that if I brought my own struggles and concerns to print, others would be able to relate and empathize with these issues. Femme invisibility was my first suggestion. It’s a concept I have both lauded and hated in my own life, and I am so proud to give a little more insight into it with this issue. Before I was comfortable with my own sexuality, I hid behind my femininity. “I’m too girly to be gay,” I thought, holding on to my misconstrued belief that I could make out with girls all I wanted, and one day the right boy would come alone, whisking me away into my heterosexual fairy tale. Even as the years passed, and the late-night make!"#$ %&%%'!(%$ #")(&*$ '(#!$ +,$ -)%#$ .!/&$ 0(*$ 0$ %&)'!"%$ relationship, I couldn’t shake the thought that maybe this is still just a phase, like so many parents try to tell us when we sit them down with our big coming out speech. Surely I am too much of a woman and too much of a housewife to truly be queer, as my butch lesbian friends liked to say. I succeeded so effortlessly in the straight world, why did I have to complicate my life by being a lesbian? Over time, it became clear to me that I was a real-life Lesbian, with a capital L. Yes, I loved dresses. I loved my long hair, and my boobs, and everything that being a woman meant to me. And yet, I still loved to make out with my girlfriend. These two aspects of my identity worked in unison in my body and in my mind, not in spite of one another, and even though I began to reconcile these two parts of myself, the rest of society didn’t seem to get it. It was after a lot of frustration and awkward coming out conversations (“That’s so sweet of you to buy me a drink, but unfortunately my girlfriend already bought me one…” as I awkwardly grabbed her hand) that I realized my femininity made me more queer, not less. My identity makes a statement even when 1$ *!$ (!#$%0,$0(,#2'(34$0(*$'#$%0,%$#20#$,!"$50((!#$5!(-(&$+&$#!$620#$,!")$7)&5!(5&'/&*$(!#'!(%$20/&$ taught you about gender or sex. I consider the queer community my family, in large par t because of this personal dichotomy I have fought within myself between my femininity and my queerness. Our community knows what it means to question everything, push outside of our comfort zones, and challenge every preconceived notion we’ve been taught throughout our lives. It is with my family in mind that I have helped complete this magazine. Please read, think, comment, and respond—whether it’s on Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr, or our web site. We are here to speak to and for you, and we want to know when we’ve got it right, and when we’ve got work to do. Keep the conversation going, and happy reading! Love,

www.outwritenewsmag.org facebook.com/outwritenewsmag @outwritenewsmag EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Katie Schowengerdt MANAGING EDITOR Bryan Platz WRITERS Kyle Brees Dylan Chouinard Kayla Vernon Clark Stephanie Gilbert Will Herder Gabe Hongsdusit Lee Jasperse Kimberly Lau Mitchell Nguyen Freza Paro Alejandra Rodriguez Austin Rose Kenny Saleh Lauren Siongco DESIGNERS Isaiah Baiseri April Lee PHOTOGRAPHERS Deanna Hong Arthur Pham ILLUSTRATORS Kendal Drucker Sarah Haugh Will Herder Stanley Lin COPY EDITOR Stephanie Gilbert COVER PHOTO Ian (mp@masterphotographer.ca) This magazine was made possible with the support of Campus Progress, a project of the Center for American Progress, online at CampusProgress.org

3|

What Are You Into?

Illustration: Will Herder

MITCHELL NGUYEN Staff Writer | mitchellbaolongnguyen@gmail.com

Fat. Hairy. Protective yet cuddly. Although these are not words advertisements typically use to indicate !"#$ %&&"%'($ )%*+$ ,%+$ )"*$ -*.$ !"'/01."*21-".$ 3"%4!($ 54$!1)1'%4'+$)%4,1*%'16".$35.1"!($25$3"$27"14$1."%'$&4"/0 erence. 8'2759,7$ %$ )%:5412+$ 5/$ ,%+$ *";!$ )%,%61*"$ <5="4!($ %.="421!")"*2!$%*.$31''35%4.!$4"1*/54<"$27"$1."%$27%2$27"$ &"4/"<2$ )%*$ 1!$ &7+!1<%''+$ '"%*$ %*.$ )9!<9'%4($ 27"4"$ %4"$ %$=%41"2+$5/$35.+$2+&"!$;1271*$27"$,%+$<5))9*12+($%*.$ just as much diversity in the men that love these less ste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and rather, each name simply indicates a personal iden0 212+$ 54$ &4"/"4"*<"($ 392$ *52$ %$ )"%!94"$ 5/$ ;5427$ 54$ %20 24%<21="*"!!?$A*$27"!"$;"3!12"!($%''$35.1"!$%4"$<"'"34%20

|4

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Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d Like My Eggs Without Ovaries

Graphic: April Lee

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5|

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Photo:: April Lee

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Ainâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t No Homo Gonna Make It To Heaven GABE HONGSDUSIT Staff Writer | gabehong@gmail.com 8'2759,7$271!$="4!"$1!$3'%2%*2($)%*+$P741!21%*!$%4"$!>"&21<%'$%3592$U13'1<%'$'12"4%'0 1!)?$FD7"$U13'"$;%!$*52$;4122"*$3+$H"!9!$71)!"'/???$27"4"/54"$12M!$*52$"*214"'+$<4".13'"$%!$ 3"1*,$27"$;54.$5/ $[5.?J$Y%241*%$)%>"!$%*$1)&542%*2$.1!21*<215*v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v27"$4"'%215*!71&$;127$[5.?$ 8!$X5*%'.5$4")1*.!$@9""4$P741!21%*!($F12M!$."-*12"'+$,51*,$25$3"$%$!249,,'"($392$7%*,$ 1*$27"4"$%*.$>*5;$27%2$[5.$1!$%';%+!$5*$+594$!1."?J$ 8'2759,7$!241<2$53!"4=%*<"$5/ $U13'1<%'$="4!"!$1!$%$<751<"$/54$@9""4$P741!21%*!($ 3"1*,$@9""4$1!$*52?$G*$/%<2($%!$Y%241*%$%&2'+$%4,9"!($3"1*,$@9""4$1!$"#%<2'+$27"$;%+$[5.$ ;%*2".$7"4$25$3"?$G*$271!$;%+($Y%241*%M!$!&14129%'12+$7"'&!$7"4$%<<"&2$7"4$@9""4*"!!$%!$ &%42$5/ $[5.M!$&'%*$/54$7"4?$FK7"*$G$4"%'16".$27%2$[5.$%'4"%.+$>*";$;7%2$G$;%!$."%'0 1*,$;127($G$/"'2$%!!94".vG$/"'2$<%')$>*5;1*,$27%2$j"M''$*"="4$,1="$)"$)54"$27%*$ ;7%2$G$<%*$7%*.'"?J$$$ $$$ $$*Names are pseudonyms as requested by the individuals.

Photo: Arthur Pham

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7|

OPINION

We Barack'ed the Voteâ&#x20AC;&#x201D; Now What?

Illustration: Will Herder

AUSTIN ROSE Staff Writer | austin.theodore.rose@ucla.edu

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A3%)%M!$ -4!2$ 2"4)$ ;%!$ 71!$ '%<>$ 5/ $ %.=5<%<+$ /54$ 1)0 )1,4%*2!?$K71'"$7"$!9&&542".$27"$CXu8T$8<2($;71<7$ ;59'.$&45=1."$%$&%27$25$'",%'$!2%29!$/54$9*.5<9)"*2".$ young people who go to college or join the military, it 9'21)%2"'+$/%1'".$25$&%!!$P5*,4"!!?$A3%)%$)%."$%$!)%''"4$ move when he announced in June that his administration ;1''$!25&$."&5421*,$%*.$1*!2"%.$;1''$5//"4$;54>$&"4)12!$25$ undocumented people under thirty. However, now that X"&93'1<%*!$%4"$2"441-".$5/ $Z%21*5!M$5="4;7"')1*,$!9&0 &542$5/ $A3%)%($27"$]4"!1."*2$7%!$%$4%4"$5&&5429*12+$25$ ,5$%$!2"&$/9427"4$%*.$&45&"'$27"$CXu8T$8<2$27459,7$ 27"$X"&93'1<%*0<5*245''".$j59!"$5/ $X"&4"!"*2%21="!?$ T%*+$ 8)"41<%*!$ %4"$ !"'/01."*21-".$ W9*.5<9@9""4!M$ ;75$1."*21/+$%!$3527$@9""4$%*.$9*.5<9)"*2".$%*.$7%="$ played leading roles in the impressive contemporary so0 <1%'$)5=")"*2$/54$1))1,4%215*$4"/54)?$S"<5*.($)%*+$5/ $ 594$@9""4$4"'%215*!71&!$%4"$*52$%';%+!$<5*2%1*".$3+$3540 ."4!$%*.$!1*<"$27"4"$1!$*5$/"."4%'$4"<5,*1215*$5/ $!%)"0!"#$ <59&'"!($)%*+$@9""4$&"5&'"$7%="$7%.$27"14$7"%42!$345>"*$ 3+$."&542%215*!?$O1*%''+($594$<59*24+M!$<944"*2$1))1,4%0 215*$!+!2")$%4,9%3'+$4"1,*!$%!$594$)5!2$3'%2%*2'+$9*:9!2$ and inhumane policy and as progressive people whose *5*0!24%1,72$ 1."*2121"!$ 1*7"4"*2'+$ )%>"$ 9!$ &5'121<%'($ ;"$ 7%="$%$4"!&5*!131'12+$25$!2%*.$9&$%,%1*!2$12?$ WORKPLACE EQUALITY. $ 8!$5/ $&4"!!$21)"($12$1!$ '",%'$1*$_k$!2%2"!$25$.1!<41)1*%2"$%,%1*!2$")&'5+""!$3%!".$ 5*$!"#9%'$541"*2%215*$%*.$1*$gR$!2%2"!$25$.5$!5$3%!".$5*$ ,"*."4$ 1."*212+$ 54$ "#&4"!!15*?$ D71!$ 1!$ %$ ,45!!$ 1*"@9%'0

12+$ 27%2$ <%*$ 3"$ 4"!5'=".$ 1/ $ A3%)%$ &4"!!94"!$ P5*,4"!!$ 25$-*%''+$&%!!$27"$u)&'5+)"*2$E5*0C1!<41)%215*$8<2($ ;71<7$7%!$3""*$&45&5!".$1*$QI$5/ $27"$'%!2$Ql$P5*,4"!0 !15*%'$ !"!!15*!$ cQkkR0_eQ_d$ 392$ *"="4$ %&&45=".?$ G*$ 27"$ <944"*2$"<5*5)1<$<41!1!($8)"41<%*!$!"">1*,$")&'5+)"*2$ %'4"%.+$ 7%="$ "*59,7$ 25$ ;544+$ %3592?$ ]4"!1."*2$ A3%)%$ )9!2$%2$'"%!2$,1="$9!$27"$&"%<"$5/ $)1*.$27%2$;"$<%**52$3"$ -4".$/54$594$@9""4*"!!? D7"$ ]4"!1."*2$ 7%!$ 2%>"*$ !5)"$ !2"&!$ /54;%4.$ 3+$ "#&%*.1*,$ ;54>&'%<"$ 3"*"-2!$ 25$ !%)"0!"#$ &%42*"4!$ 5/ $ /"."4%'$ ")&'5+""!$ %*.$ "#2"*.1*,$ 27"$ ."-*1215*$ 5/ $ ,"*."4$ .1!<41)1*%215*$ 1*$ 27"$ u@9%'$ u)&'5+)"*2$ A&&5429*12+$P5))1!!15*$25$1*<'9."$24%*!,"*."4$.1!0 <41)1*%215*?$j"$!759'.$,5$%$!2"&$/9427"4$%*.$1!!9"$%*$ executive order requiring any employers who contract ;127$27"$/"."4%'$,5="4*)"*2$25$7%="$&452"<215*!$/54$ Z[UDw$")&'5+""!$1*$27"14$&5'1<+? DATA COLLECTION. When OutWrite newsmagazine ;%!$ /59*.".$ 1*$ QkIk($ 12$ ;%!$ <%''".$ FD"*$ ]"4<"*2J$ 1*$4"/"4"*<"$25$K1''1%)$Y1*!"+M!$!29.+($;71<7$/59*.$ 27%2$2"*$&"4<"*2$5/ $)"*$7%.$7%.$!5)"$!542$5/ $!%)"0 !"#$45)%*21<$54$&7+!1<%'$1*2"4%<215*$1*$27"14$'1/"21)"?$ We now understand that our community does not %<29%''+$<5)&41!"$2"*$&"4<"*2$5/ $27"$B?S?$&5&9'%215*($ 392$ 12$ 4")%1*!$ .1//1<9'2$ 25$ ,%4*"4$ %<<94%2"$ !2%21!21<!$ ;127592$/"."4%''+$/9*.".$.%2%$<5''"<215*?$ ]4"!1."*2$A3%)%$)9!2$.14"<2$27"$B?S?$P"*!9!$U90 4"%9$25$1*<'9."$@9"!215*!$%3592$!"#9%'$541"*2%215*$%*.$ ,"*."4$ 1."*212+$ 1*$ 27"$ 5*,51*,$ 8)"41<%*$ P5))9*12+$ S94="+$%*.$E%215*%'$j"%'27$G*2"4=1";$S94="+$%!$;"''$%!$ 27"$_e_e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diverse our community is, leading to implementation 5/ $&5'1<1"!$27%2$%4"$)54"$%<<94%2"$25$594$4"%'121"!$%*.$ *"".!($%*.$,1=1*,$9!$)54"$<4".131'12+$%!$%$<5))9*12+?$ 8!$H"// $Y4"7"'+$5/ $27"$P"*2"4$/54$8)"41<%*$]45,0 4"!!$ &4".1<2!($ FD7"$ A3%)%$ %.)1*1!24%215*$ 7%!$ .5*"$ %$ 24")"*.59!$%)59*2$5/ $;54>$/54$Z[UD$8)"41<%*!V$q;"$ !759'.r$"#&"<2$27%2$25$<5*21*9"?J$U92$'"2$9!$*52$!1)&'+$ 75&"$/54$<7%*,"V$;"$)9!2$1*!2"%.$<5))%*.$]4"!1."*2$ A3%)%$25$%..4"!!$594$<5))9*12+M!$*"".!?

Photo: Arthur Pham

Femme in the Streets, Queer in the Sheets

LAUREN SIONGCO Staff Writer | lsiongco31@ucla.edu

FU92$+59M4"$255$&4"22+$25$3"$%$'"!31%*tJ O54$/"))"01."*21-".$@9""4$;5)"*($271!$1!$%$<5)0 mon response when they choose to come out. When /594270+"%4$ ["*."4$ S29.1"!$ !29."*2$ U41%*%$ T"*.56%$ 7"%4!$271!($!7"$!1)&'+$45''!$7"4$"+"!?$FG2M!$5*"$5/ $275!"$ 3%<>7%*.".$ <5)&'1)"*2!(J$ T"*.56%$ "#&'%1*!?$ D7"!"$ 2+&"!$ 5/ $ <5)&'1)"*2!$ )%>"$ %*$ %!!9)&215*$ %3592$ 7"4$ !"#9%'12+$ 3+$ &4%1!1*,$ 7"4$ /")1*1*"$ @9%'121"!($ %$ &5!!13'+$ *1<"$,"!294"($392$5*"$27%2$1!$9'21)%2"'+$:9!2$49."$%*.$750 )5&7531<$3"<%9!"$27"$<5))"*2!$5*'+$4"1*/54<"$!2"4"50 types. D71!$/""'1*,$1!$<5))5*'+$4"/"44".$25$%!$/"))"$1*0 =1!131'12+?$ 8'2759,7$ 27"$ @9""4*"!!$ 5/ $ %$ /"))"$ ;5)%*$ 1!$*52$/9''+$=%'1.%2".$1*$%$!5<1"2+$27%2$"#&"<2!$"="4+5*"$ 25$3"$!24%1,72($.9"$25$%$'%<>$5/ $!2"4"52+&1<%'$@9""4$!1,0 *1-"4!$ '1>"$ )54"$ )%!<9'1*"$ <'5271*,$ 54$ 35.+$ '%*,9%,"($ )%*+$/"))"$@9""4$;5)"*$.5$*52$/""'$/9''+$9*."4!255.$ or accepted in the queer community either. â&#x20AC;&#x153;We can get '55>".$ %2$ 3+$ 527"4$ '"!31%*!$ '1>"$ ;"$ .5*i2$ 3"'5*,($ %*.$ !24%1,72$&"5&'"$.5*i2$3"'1"="$;"i4"$,%+(J$T"*.56%$!%+!?$$ O9427"4)54"($ T"*.56%$ !%1.$ 27%2$ !7"$ !5)"21)"!$ F/""'!$ &9!7".$ 592$ 5/ $ &'%<"!$ 27%2$ %4"$ .""&'+$ &5'121<%'?J$ O"))"$1*=1!131'12+$)"%*!$@9""4$/"))"$;5)"*$<%*$/""'$ '1>"$ 27"+$ %4"$ *52$ "*214"'+$ %<<"&2".$ 1*$ "127"4$ !24%1,72$ 54$ queer spaces. U"<%9!"$ /"))"!$ %4"$ .1!49&21*,$ 27"$ *5215*$ 5/ $ 27"$ %!!9)".$ <5**"<215*$ 3"2;""*$ ,"*."4$ &"4/54)%*<"$ %*.$ sexuality, their identities are inherently politically charged ;7"27"4$ /"))"$ ;5)"*$ ;%*2$ 25$ 3"$ 54$ *52?$ T"*.56%$ <755!"!$25$")34%<"$27"$&5'121<!$5/ $7"4$1."*212+$27459,7$

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Photo: Priapus (website: PhotosByPriapus.com; email: Priapus@PhotosByPriapus.com)

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K7%2$ .5$ !75"0754*!($ <75&!21<>!($ <%*.'"!($ !&55*!($ 7%14349!7"!($ 45&"($ /9<>0)%<71*"!($ '%2"#($ whips and something called a dragonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s tongue 7%="$ 1*$ <5))5*\$ 8''$ %4"$ 759!"75'.$ 53:"<2!($ +"!($ 392$27"14$9!"$1!$*52$/54$<55>1*,$54$<'"%*1*,?$D7"!"$ 12")!$ 4"&4"!"*2$ !5)"$ 5/ $ 27"$ !2%&'"!$ 9!".$ .941*,$ W&'%+$!<"*"!M$3+$)")3"4!$27"$UCST$<5))9*12+? T+$ 1*2"4"!2$ 1*$ 27"$ UCST$ <5))9*12+$ 3",%*$ ;7"*$G$4"%.$27"$s`e$S7%."!$5/ $[4"+s$!"41"!?$K71'"$ ;4121*,$ )+$ 3'5,$ &5!2$ 5*$ 27"$ 241'5,+($ G$ *521<".$ 27%2$ 27"$355>!$4%1!".$)54"$@9"!215*!$27%*$27"+$%*!;"4".?$ K7%2$%<21=121"!$.5$&"5&'"$1*$27"$UCST$<5))9*12+$ "*:5+\$j5;$)9<7$21)"$.5$<59&'"!$!&"*.$1*$C5)x !93$45'"!\$G!$UCST$:9!2$%*527"4$>1*.$5/ $!"#\$84"$ C5)1*%*2$ 1*.1=1.9%'!$ 249'+$ F`e$ !7%."!$ 5/ $ /9<>".$ 9&\s$%*.$)%*+$)54"? In order to answer my questions, I created an

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%<<59*2$ 5*$ O"2Z1/"($ "!!"*21%''+$ O%<"355>M!$ >1*>+$ <59!1*($ 27%2$ %''5;!$ >1*>!2"4!$ 25$ /41"*.($ )"!!%,"($ "#<7%*,"$ &7525!$ %*.$ <7%2$ ;127$ 527"4$ >1*>!2"4!?$ D7"$!12"$"="*$7%!$%*$"="*2$2%3$;71<7$G$9!".$25$/1*.$ 27"$>1*>$&%42+$G$%22"*.".$"%4'1"4$271!$@9%42"4$25$,"2$ %$/""'$c*5$&9*$1*2"*.".d$/54$27"$<5))9*12+? D7459,7$O"2Z1/"($G$;%!$%3'"$25$)"!!%,"$UCST$ "*279!1%!2!$ 25$ '"%4*$ %3592$ 27"14$ '1/"!2+'"?$ T%*+$ 9!"4!$ 7%.$ !94&41!1*,'+$ .1="4!"$ /"21!7"!$ 1*<'9.1*,$ *"".'"!$ %*.$ <9221*,($ 45&"$ %*.$ '"%27"4$ 35*.%,"($ "'"<241<0&'%+($!&%*>1*,($4%&"0&'%+$%*.$3"1*,$%$!'%="?$ A*"$ '"!31%*01."*21/1".$ 9!"4$ ."!<413".$ 2;5$ 5/ $ 7"4$ /"21!7"!$ %!$ F!"#$ ;127$ )"*$ ;75$ '55>$ '1>"$ /%27"4!J$ %*.$ F&",,1*,$ q&"*"24%21*,$ =1%$ !24%&05*r$ &4"22+$ 35+!$ ;75$ '55>$ '1>"$ /4%2$ 35+!?J$ C"!&12"$ 27"$ =%41".$ /"21!7"!($ )%*+$ 9!"4!$ !7%4".$ !1)1'%4$ 7%4.$ '1)12!($ including excrement, incest play, and acts leaving

permanent damage. K7"*$G$<4"%2".$)+$O"2Z1/"$%<<59*2($G$;%!$%!>".$ )+$ !"#9%'$ 541"*2%215*$ %*.$ &'%+$ 45'"($ /54$ ;71<7$ 27"$ 5&215*!$ 1*<'9.".m$ C5)1*%*2($ S;12<7($ !93)1!!1="($ T1!24"!!($!'%="($&"2($>%:14%($D5&($U5225)($S%.1!2($T%!0 5<71!2($8,"&'%+"4($C%..+($3%3+,14'($34%2($&41)%'($j"0 .5*1!2$ %*.$ L%*1''%?$ G$ !"22'".$ 5*$ S;12<7$ 3"<%9!"$ 12$ !"")".$ 27"$ )5!2$ ,"*"4%'($ 392$ %'!5$ 3"<%9!"$ G$ /1,94".$ 45'"!$ ;"4"$ *52$ 1*<4".13'+$ 1)&542%*2?$ 8!$ 12$ 294*".$ 592($ )%*+$ 1*2"4=1";""!$ ."!<413".$ 27"14$ 45'"!$%!$3"1*,$1*241*!1<$25$27"14$&"4!5*%'12+?$FG$1."*0 21/+$ %!$ %$ !93)1!!1="$ 3"<%9!"$ %'2759,7$ Gi)$ %$ ="4+$ <%&%3'"$ &"4!5*($ G$ &4"/"4$ 25$ 3"$ 27"$ 5*"$ /5''5;1*,($ 27"$ 5*"$ >""&1*,$ %''$ 27"$ 5..!$ %*.$ "*.!$ 21.1".$ 9&?$ Gi)$%$!'%="$25$)+$&41)%4+$3"<%9!"$27%2$1!$27"$&5;"4$ dynamic we negotiated. I was craving less control over some things, and she agreed. I wear her collar

%''$27"$21)"($%*.$12$."'1,72!$)"?J However, identities and roles can evolve. “I 7%="$ "#&'54".$ >122+$ &'%+$ 392$ 27%2$ 7%!$ ,5*"$ 3+$ 27"$ ;%+!1."$ %!$ G$ 7%="$ !2%42".$ 25$ 1."*21/+$ )54"$ %!$ %$ &9&&+?$D71!$1."*212+???,1="!$)"$%$<7%*<"$25$3"<5)"$ more simplistic. All I need to do is please and 53"+$)+$A;*"4$;71'"$3"1*,$%$&9&&+?$D7"4"$%4"$*5$ 527"4$ 49'"!($ *5$ :9.,)"*2!($ %*.$ !5$ /%4($ *5$ &9*1!70 )"*2!?$ 8''$ G$ *"".$ 1!$ 27"$ ,91.%*<"$ 5/ $ )+$ A;*"4$ %*.$ 27"$ 249!2$ 27%2$ 7"$ ;1''???>""&$ )"$ !%/"?J$ A*"$ user added another dimension, explaining that her 1."*21/1<%215*$ )%+$ *52$ /12$ *"%2'+$ 1*25$ 5*"$ '%3"'$ 54$ %*527"4?$ FT+$ /14!2$ ="*294"!$ 1*25$ UCST($ G$ 1."*210 /1".$%!$C5)1*%*2$3"<%9!"$G$;%!$9*."4$27"$1)&4"!0 !15*$27%2$!93)1!!1="$&"5&'"$;"4"$;"%>$%*.$;%*2".$ 25$3"$79)1'1%2".$53:"<2!$5/ $%$<49"'$T%!2"4xT1!24"!!?$ I learned otherwise when I actually acquired a men0 254?$D7459,7q592r$)+$UCST$="*294"!($G$7%q="r$3""*$ %$'5*,2"4)$*9."$!'%="($%$25&x35225)($C5))"x!93($ "="*$%$T1!24"!!?$G$1."*21/+$%!$&41)%'$*5;($3"<%9!"??? )+$!"#9%'12+$1!$1*!21*<29%'$%*.$255$345%.$25$<5*!1.0 "4$ )+!"'/ $ %!$ C5)x!93x!;12<7x/"21!71!2x>1*>!2"4x 312<7V$ G$ <%*M2$ 3"$ %$ !'%="$ 3"<%9!"($ %'2759,7$ G$ '5="$ !241<2$&4525<5'($G$<%*i2$/5''5;$!5)"5*"$"'!"M!$%,"*.%$ %!$%$&41)%'$&"4!5*$/54$'5*,V$G$<%*M2$3"$%$T1!24"!!$3"0 cause my spontaneous needs and impulsive actions ;59'.*i2$3"$!2%3'"$"*59,7$/54$%$Cx!$4"'%215*!71&?$G$ ,5$ ;127$ )+$ 1*!21*<2!???%$ >*5;1*,$ +59$ <%*i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x%*#1"2+$ 4"'"%!"$ /45)$ .14"<2$ &7+!1<%'$ &%1*?$ G$ '1>"$ !7%4&$ !21*,1*,$ !"*!%215*!$ 27%2$ ,1="$ )"$ <71''!?$ D7"$ !21)9'%215*$ )%>"!$ 54,%!)!$ %$ '52$ )54"$ 1*2"*!"?$T+$/14!2$!"!!15*$;%!$;127$%$/41"*.$;75$9!".$ 25$3"$%$&450C5))"?$S7"$21".$)"$9&$%*.$!&%*>".x 3"%2$ )"?$ G$ "*:5+".$ 75;$ G$ ;%!$ %3'"$ 25$ 34"%27"$ 27459,7$ 12?$ X"%<71*,$ 27%2$ !24"!!$ 4"'"%!"$ <%*$ 341*,$ 9&$%$'52$5/ $")5215*!($9!9%''+$2"%4!$%*.$%*$1*<4"%!".$ *"".$25$3"$1*$+594$C5)M!$%4)!$q%$&45<"!!$>*5;*$%!$ %/2"4<%4"r?$G$%.54"$27"$&45<"!!$5/ $%$,55.$3"%21*,?J$ Although many users agreed that physical pain 1!$&'"%!94%3'"$1*$%*.$5/ $12!"'/($527"4$1*2"4=1";""!$."0

!<413".$ &7+!1<%'$ &%1*$ %!$ .""&'+$ 27"4%&"921<?$ FG$ 7%="$ %$24593'".$&%!2$27%2$1*=5'=".$!"'/01*:94+?$C941*,$5*"$ 5/ $ 27"!"$ 21)"!$ G$ 4"%'16".$ 27%2$ G$ ;%!$ ,"221*,$ )54"$ &'"%!94"$27%*$27"$2+&1<%'$")5215*%'x!"'/0."!249<21="$ 4"'"%!"?$ G$ 27"*$ [55,'".$ ;7+$ 27%2$ ;%!$ %*.$ .1!<5=0 ered the scene. Ironically, I haven’t done any cutting !<"*"!?$GM="$5*'+$.5*"$1)&%<2$!<"*"!???3"<%9!"$27%2M!$ 27"$2+&"$5/ $D5&$G$/59*.?J$ 8'2759,7$&%1*$%&&"%'!$25$)%*+$UCST$"*2790 !1%!2!$/54$.1//"4"*2$4"%!5*!($%''$!"")$25$%,4""$27%2$ 1*2"*!"$!"*!%215*$7%!$,4"%2"4$"//"<2!$27%*$:9!2$27"$ physical experience during a scene. “Pain centers )"?$ G$ 4")")3"4$ .51*,$ 12$ ;7"*$ G$ ;%!$ %$ <71'.$ %*.$ 271*,!$ ;"4"$ 592!1."$ 5/ $ )+$ <5*245'($ 27"*$ %,%1*$ when I’m older and I can’t seem to control my '1/"?J$ A*"$ &%421<1&%*2$ %,4"".($ %..1*,$ 27%2$ 4"<"1=0 1*,$ &7+!1<%'$ &%1*$ <%*$ 3"$ "#24")"'+$ ")&5;"41*,?$ “What attracts me is that it's pain I choose. I have <745*1<$ &%1*$ &453'")!($ !5$ 3"1*,$ %3'"$ 25$ <755!"$ good$&%1*$1!$4"%''+$%$4"'1"/?$S5)"21)"!($1/ $)+$&%1*$1!$ 4"%''+$3%.($Gi''$%<29%''+$%!>$/54$%$!&%*>1*,$3"<%9!"$ 12$ !542$ 5/ $ 5="441."!$ q27"r$ 3%.$ &%1*$ !1,*%'!$ 1*$ )+$ 34%1*$/54$%$'122'"$312?$G2$,1="!$)"$%$341"/ $4"!2$/45)$ %''$27"$3%.$&%1*?J$ I also gained insight into motivation to give

STEPHANIE GILBERT Staff Writer | sranzgilbert@gmail.com &7+!1<%'$ &%1*?$ FT+$ &%42*"4$ '1>".$ 25$ 3"$ !'%&&".$ 54$ 7%="$ 7"4$ 7%14$ &9''".$ %*.$ 27%2$ >1*.$ 5/ $ /4"%>".$ )"$ 592$%$312($392$'5="$1!$%$!24%*,"$271*,$%*.$+59$'"%4*$ 25$ .5$ 271*,!$ +59$ )1,72$ *52$ *54)%''+$ .5$ 3"<%9!"$ 12$)%>"!$&"5&'"$+59$<%4"$%3592$7%&&+$54$/9'/1''".($ %*.$27%2i!$/9'/1''1*,$1*$12!"'/?J$ A*"$ 5/ $ 27"$ )1!<5*<"&215*!$ )+$ 1*2"4=1";""!$ <'%41/1".$;%!$27"$<5**"<215*$3"2;""*$UCST$%*.$!"#?$ 8'2759,7$G$&4"=159!'+$%!!9)".$UCST$;%!$%$;%+$25$ !&1<"$9&$5*"M!$!"#$'1/"($271!$;%!$*52$%';%+!$27"$<%!"?$ A*"$&%421<1&%*2$."!<413".$*5*0!"#9%'$UCST$%<21=0 121"!?$FD7"4"$%4"$)%*+$.1//"4"*2$&4%<21<"!$1*$UCST$ 27%2$ %4"*M2$ *"<"!!%41'+$ !"#9%'?$ G$ '5="$ 35.+$ )5.1/10 <%215*($ !9<7$ %!$ <54!"2!($ !'%="$ <5''%4!($ !'%="$ )%4>0 1*,$ %*.$ *9."$ !"4=1<"0541"*2".$ !93)1!!15*$ %!$ ;"''$ %!$ ;54>1*,$ 25;%4.!$ &'"%!1*,$ !5)"5*"?$ K7"*$ G$ .5$ %$!"!!15*$%*.$G$%)$3"1*,$!&%*>".x3"%2"*($12$.5"!*M2$ 7%="$ 25$ 3"$ !"#9%'($ !%)"$ %!$ ;7"*$ G$ ;%!$ %$ <922"4($ 12$ ;%!*M2$ /54$ !"#9%'$ 4"%!5*!?$ G$ 4"<"*2'+$ ;"*2$ 25$ %$ !710 3%41$&%42+$;71<7$;%!$:9!2$25$'"%4*$75;$25$41,($*52$ 75;$25$!".9<"?$UCST$1!$%*$%42$/54)$/14!2($!"#9%'$ *"#2?J$ D7"$ .1!21*<215*$ 3"2;""*$ UCST$ %*.$ !"#$ 1!$ )54"$41,1.$;7"*$%$&"4!5*$>""&!$27"14$UCST$4"'%0 215*!71&$ !"&%4%2"$ /45)$ !"#9%'x45)%*21<$ 4"'%215*0

Photo: Ian Payton (mp@masterphotographer.ca)

HARDER:

A LOOK INTO THE BDSM COMMUNITY

11 |

!71&!?$ 8!$ 5*"$ &%421<1&%*2$ "#&'%1*".($ F)+$ /%=5412"$ 25&$%*.$G$7%="$%3!5'92"'+$*5$")5215*%'$<5**"<215*$ ;7%2!5"="4?$ D5$ 3"$ !&"<1/1<($ 7"M!$ *"%4$ ge$ +"%4!$ )+$ !"*154$%*.$7%!$%$=%*1''%$;1/"$;75$%''5;!$71)$25$.5$ 271!$ 5*$ 27"$ ;"">"*.!?J$ j5;"="4($ 271!$ &%421<1&%*2$ ;"*2$5*$25$%.)12$27%2$%'2759,7$FG$>""&$12$!"&%4%2"$ and there are certainly play times where things stay that way...with the right person, there’s no way to >""&$12$/45)$3"1*,$!"#9%'?J D7"$ 5="4%''$ <5*!"*!9!$ !"")".$ 25$ 3"$ 27%2$ 1*2"40 !"<215*%'12+$3"2;""*$5*"M!$!"#9%'$%*.$UCST$1."*212+$ <%*$ 3"$ "#24")"'+$ "*41<71*,?$ 8!$ 5*"$ &%421<1&%*2$ !%1.($ FG$.5*i2$/""'$'1>"$G$%)$%$@9""4$%*.$<1!,"*."4".$/")%'"$ %*.$%$H";$%*.$%$!93)1!!1="?$Gi)$%$@9""4/")%'"H";!93($ !%1.$ %''$ 1*$ 5*"$ 34"%27?$ S5)"21)"!$ G$ 7%="$ 25$ !"&%4%2"$ 592$&%42!$5/ $)"($%*.$;"%4$5*'+$5*"$54$2;5$5/ $275!"$ 1."*2121"!($392$)+$."/%9'2$!2%2"$1!$%$;54.$27%2$.5"!*i2$ "#1!2$25$."!<413"$%''$275!"$!2%2"!$"#1!21*,$%2$5*<"?J Intersectionality is not the only parallel to the @9""4$<5))9*12+?$T%*+$1*2"4=1";""!$"#&4"!!".$%$.""&$ 1."*21-<%215*$;127$UCST$27%2$3",%*$+"%4!$3"/54"$27"+$ experienced the community’s support. “I have realized I was a masochist since I was a small child, I’d venture 25$!%+$l$+"%4!$5'.$54$!5?$G$!2%42".$3"1*,$1*=5'=".$;127$ 527"4!$;7"*$G$;%!$QR$%*.$7"$;%!$_e?$D71!$;%!$*52$27"$ )5!2$1."%'$!129%215*$392$G$;%!$255$+59*,$25$>*5;$%*+$ 3"22"4?$G$.1.*M2$-*%''+$"*2"4$27"$W<5))9*12+M$9*21'$%3592$ %$ +"%4$ %,5($ ;71<7$ 1!$ 5*"$ 5/ $ 27"$ 4"%!5*!$ 27%2$ G$ &9!7$ <5))9*12+$!5$)9<7V$12$7%!$)%."$@912"$%$.1//"4"*<"$1*$ )+$'1/"?J$P5**"<21*,$27459,7$O"2Z1/"$54$UCST$"="*2!$ ;127$527"4$"*279!1%!2!$7"'&!$)%*+$1*.1=1.9%'!$/""'$%<0 cepted and welcomed. B*/5429*%2"'+($'1>"$27"$@9""4$<5))9*12+($27"4"$ 1!$ )%4,1*%'16%215*$ 5/ $ 27"$ '"!!$ W%<<"&2%3'"M$ 1."*210 21"!v=%*1''%$ &"5&'"$ !"")$ %3'"$ 25$ %<<"&2$ <"42%1*$ UCST$1."*2121"!$)54"$27%*$527"4!?$F8UCZxZ122'"!$ are given so much less respect...along with people who are into watersports and scat. It's seen as dis0 ,9!21*,($1*7"4"*2'+$3%.?$8$7"2"45$)%'"$C5)($/")%'"$ !93$<59&'"$;75i!$1*25$!5)"$45&"($!5)"$'"%27"4($%*.$ *5271*,$255$1*2"*!"$1*$2"4)!$5/ $1)&%<2$;1''$%';%+!$ 3"$!""*$%!$27"$)5!2$*54)%'?J$ u="*$ ;1271*$ 27"$ UCST$ <5))9*12+($ 27"4"$ 1!$ &4":9.1<"($ 392$ 12$ 1!$ 5/2"*$ 4"="4!".?$ S1)1'%4$ 25$ W310 &7531%M$ 1*$ 27"$ @9""4$ <5))9*12+($ 54$ :9.,)"*2$ 5/ $ individuals viewed as ‘too mainstream,’ “criticism 1!$71,7$5*$)54"$=%*1''%03%!".$>1*>!($!9<7$%!$&"5&'"$ ;75$5*'+$%!!5<1%2"$;127$UCST$25$,"2$3'5;:53!$q54r$ <%''$;5)"*$!'92!?$]"5&'"$1*$27"$UCST$<5))9*12+$ %4"$!<%4".$5/ $1)&5!2"4!($27"+$.5*M2$'1>"$5&"*1*,$9&$ 27"14$>1*>!$25$!5)"5*"$;75$1!$q'55>1*,$/54r$%$@91<>$

| 12

Photo: Priapus (website: PhotosByPriapus.com; email: Priapus@PhotosByPriapus.com)

IF IT HURTS, DO IT HARDER (cont.)

;%+$25$7%="$W=%*1''%$!"#M?$]"5&'"$."/1*12"'+$<4121<16"$ 7"2"45!"#9%'$ <59&'"!$ !"">1*,$ %$ 2714.$ /")%'"$ /54$ &'%+x4"'%215*!71&($ 9!9%''+$ 3"<%9!"$ 27"+???.5*M2$ &92$ 1*$%*+$<5*!1."4%215*$5/ $27"$1*<5)1*,$/")%'"?J 8'2759,7$27"$)54"$W=%*1''%M$/"21!7"!$)%+$"#&"410 "*<"$ .1!<41)1*%215*$ /45)$ 527"4$ >1*>!2"4!($ "="*$ 27"$ )5!2$"#24")"$/"21!71!2!$)%1*2%1*$27%2$27"14$1*=5'="0 )"*2$1*$27"$UCST$<5))9*12+$.5"!$*52$)%>"$27")$ !5<1%'$ 592'1"4!?$ FD7"$ .1!<41)1*%215*$ G$ /""'$ 1!$ )%1*0 '+$ &"5&'"$ <5))"*21*,$ 5*$ /%'!"$ 1*/54)%215*$ %3592$ UCSTm$ 27%2$ ;"$ %4"$ ,41)+$ '5!"4!$ ;75$ "#1!2$ 5*'+$ %2$ night to go to nasty dungeons where people impose 5*$+594$&"4!5*%'$!&%<"$%*.$;%*2$25$3"%2$+59$!"*!"0 '"!!????]"5&'"$ .5*M2$ 9*."4!2%*.$ 27%2$ 1*$ UCST($ 27"$ 49'"!$ &"42%1*$ 25$ S%/"($ S%*"$ %*.$ P5*!"*!9%'?$ u="4+0 271*,$1!$.5*"$/54$27"$"*:5+)"*2$5/ $275!"$1*=5'=".??? UCST$1!$)54"$27%*$:9!2$U5*.%,"($C5)1*%*<"($%*.$ S%.50T%!5<71!)($ 12M!$ 27"$ <4%=1*,???25$ /9'/1''$ ."!14"!$ ;127592$ !7%)"?J$ 8*527"4$ &%421<1&%*2$ %,4"".($ %4,90 1*,$27%2$27"$31,,"!2$)1!<5*<"&215*$%3592$27"$UCST$ <5))9*12+$1!$F27%2$;"i4"$%''$%$39*<7$5/ $."=1%*2!$54$ 24593'"$)%>"4!?$Gi)$41.1<9'59!'+$'%;$%31.1*,($G$.5*i2$ "="*$,5$1*$27"$/%!2$<7"<>592$'%*"$1/ $G$7%="$)54"$27%*$ Q_$ 12")!t$ K"i4"$ 27"$ !%)"$ %!$ +59?$ K"i4"$ +594$ )5270 ers, and daughters, your uncles, your clergy. We're *52$.1//"4"*2?J Rather than judging, one participant urged ‘va0 *1''%M$&"5&'"$25$'"%4*$%3592$27"$<5))9*12+?$FG$;59'.$ say to them...go to classes, go to munches, meet people, learn as much as you can and when you’re 4"%.+($;"M4"$7"4"$25$7"'&$+59$.5$;7%2$+59M.$'1>"?J$

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The Ship Has Sailed THE QUEER COMMUNITYâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S RELATIONSHIP WITH FANDOM

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Illustration: Username Gone-Batty at DeviantArt

KAYLA VERNON CLARK Staff Writer | kaylavc@gmail.com

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13 |

OPINION

The New Normal is Un-Queer

Photo: The New Normal

LEE JASPERSE Staff Writer | ljasperse@ucla.edu

8<<54.1*,$ 25$ [Z88C($ 27"$ _eQ_0_eQg$ 2"'"=1!15*$ !"%!5*$/"%294"!$27"$)5!2$Z[UD$<7%4%<2"4!$!1*<"$27"+$ 3",%*$ >""&1*,$ 24%<>$ l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who is attempting to have a child with his masculine gy0 *"<5'5,1!2$ &%42*"4$ C%=1.$ 27459,7$ !9445,%<+($ ."<'%4"!($ F%3*54)%'$1!$27"$*";$*54)%'?J$$8!$1/ $25$<'%41/+$27"$&45:0 "<2$5/ $27"$!75;($271!$&51*2$1!$!&"''".$592$1*$*"%4'+$"="4+$ "&1!5."($%')5!2$%!$%*$%*#159!$."/"*!"$)"<7%*1!)?$G*$%<0 tuality, the showâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s humor relies almost entirely on stereo0 typing which is not merely on par with more â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;traditionalâ&#x20AC;&#x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

| 14

ning, their rapport is modeled on traditional gendered 79)54?$$U4+%*$."*1,4%2"!$C%=1.M!$'5="$5/ $!&542!$%*.$.1!0 21*<2$'%<>$5/ $<%)&0>*5;'".,"($;71'"$C%=1.M!$)5<>"4+$5/ $ U4+%*M!$<5*<"4*$;127$/%!715*$%*.$!2+'"$="4,"!$5*$%*$%*210 /")1*1!2$4".9<215*$5/ $*5*0)%!<9'1*"$,"*."4$"#&4"!!15*$ 25$ !7%''5;$ )%2"41%'1!)vU4+%*M!$ /"))"0*"!!$ %''5;1*,$ 71)$25$5*'+$3"$<5*<"4*".$;127$!2+'"$%*.$/%!715*?$$P%!"$ 1*$ &51*2m$ 1*$ 5*"$ "&1!5."($ C%=1.$ :5>"!$ 27%2$ U4+%*$ 5*'+$ wants a child so that he can dress it up. D7"$!75;$;"%>'+$%22")&2!$25$&%!!$5// $12!$53!"!0 !15*$ ;127$ ,"*."4$ "#&4"!!15*$ .1//"4"*<"!$ %!$ '1,72$ !%40 <%!)$ 1*$ 27"$ !2"4"52+&".$ 24%.1215*$ 5/ $ ,%+$ <%221*"!!?$$ D71!$1!$&4"<1!"'+$;7%2$)5!2$4"="%'!$27"$!75;M!$9*."40 lying heteronormative value system and its attempt 25$%!!1)1'%2"$,%+*"!!$1*25$27%2$/4%)";54>?$$8'2759,7$ U4+%*$%*.$C%=1.$!2%2"$27"14$'5="$/54$5*"$%*527"4$9!90 ally multiple times per episode, their underlying re0 lationship seems distinctly loveless, each uncompre0 7"*.1*,$5/ $%*.$'%<>1*,$<5)&%!!15*$/54$27"$527"4?$$ ]"47%&!$ 271!$ 1!$ 3"<%9!"$ 27"$ <59&'"M!$ !"*21)"*2%'$ )5)"*2!$ %';%+!$ 1*=5'="$ 27"$ 25&1<$ 5/ $ &%4"*21*,$ 54$ )%441%,"($%*.$5/2"*$2%>"$&'%<"$;127$27"$!5*5,4%)$1)0 %,"$5/ $27"14$3%3+$'12"4%''+$1*$27"$3%<>,459*.?$$O4%)".$ 1*$271!$;%+$3+$X+%*$T94&7+($7%&&1*"!!$%*.$'5="($"="*$ /54$,%+$<59&'"!($5*'+$7%="$)"%*1*,$;7"*$%22%<7".$25$ "*2121"!$ !%*<215*".$ 3+$ 7"2"45*54)%21="$ !5<1"2+($ !9<7$ as child rearing and marriage. D7"$,%+*"!!$1*$27"$!75;($27"*($1!$<"42%1*'+$*52$@9""4($ *52$ &4"!"*21*,$ *";$ 54$ .1//"4"*2$ ;%+!$ 5/ $ 3"1*,$ 1*$ '5="($ relating to one another, or navigating within oppressive

1*!2129215*!?$G*."".($U4+%*$%*.$C%=1.$<5*!2%*2'+$9!"$27"14$ ;712"($9&&"4<'%!!$&41=1'","$25$532%1*$27"$3"!2$'%;+"4!($.5<0 254!($ %*.$ ,"*"!v27459,7$ "#&"*!1="$ ,"*"21<$ <59*!"'1*,$ %*.$%$fg`(eee$<5*24%<2$."%'$;127$27"14$!9445,%2"v*"="4$ experiencing the impediments to access or representation 27%2$)5!2$Z[UD$1*.1=1.9%'!$/%<"$"%<7$.%+? D7"$ .",4""$ 25$ ;71<7$ 27"$ !75;$ %22")&2!$ 25$ *540 )%'16"$ 527"4*"!!$ 27459,7$ 25>"*16%215*$ 1!$ !5$ "#24")"$ at moments that the show appears to lapse into satire. G*$ "&1!5."$ h($ S7%*1%($ 27"$ !9445,%2"M!$ k0+"%405'.$ .%9,70 2"4($ 7%!$ %$ )5<>$ ;"..1*,$ ;71<7($ .9"$ 25$ 27"$ "//542!$ 5/ $ Bryan, is ultimately as extravagant as any real wedding. X%27"4$27%*$!"4=1*,$%!$%$/%4<1<%'$<5))"*2%4+$5*$27"$!9&0 &5!".$'",121)%<+$5/ $!5<1%'$4129%'!$'1>"$;"..1*,!($U4+%*M!$ emotional attachment to the literally childish ceremony )5="!$ C%=1.$ 25$ &45&5!"$ 25$ 71)$ 1*$ 5*"$ 5/ $ 27"$ !75;M!$ most cloyingly sentimental moments to date. G/ $271!$1!$4"&4"!"*2%21="$5/ $27"$,%+$41,72!$)5=")"*2($ &"47%&!$ ;7%2$ ;"$ <%*$ 2%>"$ /45)$ 271!$ !75;$ 1!$ 27%2$ 594$ <1=1'$41,72!$+%4.$!21<>$*"".!$25$3"$"#%)1*".?$FD7"$E";$ E54)%'J$ )"%!94"!$ &45,4"!!$ 3+$ 7"2"45*54)%21="$ '%*.0 )%4>!$'1>"$)%441%,"$%*.$<71'.$3"%41*,?$$G*!2"%.$5/ $!75;0 1*,$<59&'"!$27%2$.5*M2$*"".$<71'.4"*$25$/""'$/9'-''".($27%2$ .5*M2$4"'+$5*$!"#$45'"!$25$<5))9*1<%2"($27%2$-*.$'",1210 macy and joy in their relationship through means other than marriage, it assimilates gayness into a preexisting *54)%'<+?$$G*!2"%.$5/ $")&2+1*,$592$!5<1"2+M!$*5215*!$5/ $ what counts as normal, good, and legitimate, it invests )54"$ &5;"4$ 1*$ <5*!"4=%21="$ 1*!2129215*!$ '1>"$ )%441%,"?$$ 8*.$271!$1!$="4+$9*0@9""4?

OPINION

Lights Out QUEER SEX ON TV ALEJANDRA RODRIGUEZ Staff Writer | alira0115@yahoo.com the implication in these scenarios is that queerness or *5*0*54)%21="$!"#$%';%+!$4"@914"!$%*$"#&'%*%215*?$ O14!20+"%4$27"%2"4$!29."*2$Y%2"41*%$]%,!5'1*,%*$%,4""!$ 27%2$@9""4$!"#$5*$2"'"=1!15*$1!$1*%<<94%2"$3"<%9!"$F%$'52$5/ $ 27"$21)"$12i!$&5424%+".$/%14'+$%;>;%4.'+$3"<%9!"$5*"$5/ $27"$ <7%4%<2"4!$1!$*54)%''+$9*<5)/542%3'"$%3592$12$/54$5*"$4"%0 !5*$54$%*527"4($!5$G$.5*M2$271*>$12i!$4"&4"!"*2".$="4+$%<<90 4%2"'+$%2$%''J?$w9""4$&"5&'"$.5$*52$'1="$24%,1<$'1="!($392$3+$ showcasing queer sex as a pity party more than a romantic %*.$")5215*%'$"#&"41"*<"$<%9!"!$=1";"4!v;75$)%+$*52$ >*5;$@9""4$&"5&'"$3"!1."!$275!"$27"+$!""$5*$2"'"=1!15*v 25$%!!9)"$27%2$%''$@9""4$+5927$%4"$24593'".$%*.$."&4"!!".$ and that coming to terms with one's sexuality is an inher0 "*2'+$*",%21="$%*.$!7%)"/9'$"#&"41"*<"? A*$27"$n1&$!1."($@9""4$755>9&!$5*$2"'"=1!15*$."&1<2$ @9""4$!"#$%!$="4+$<%!9%'$%*.$241=1%'($%!$1/ $%''$;"$.5$1!$,5$ 25$3%4!$%*.$755>$9&$;127$!24%*,"4!?$D71!$1!$&453'")%21<$ 3"<%9!"$ 12$ 4"1*/54<"!$ 27"$ !2"4"52+&"$ 27%2$ @9""4$ &"5&'"$ %4"$&45)1!<959!$%*.$!'"%6+?$Fw9""4$!"#$1!$&5424%+".$%!$ &94"'+$%3592$27"$!"#?$S5)"$)%+$!""$12$%!$&45)1!<959!$%!$ &5424%+".$3+$27"$)".1%(J$-4!20+"%4$39!1*"!!$%.)1*1!24%0 215*$!29."*2$S1%4%$H9%4"6$!%+!?$D71!$1!$"@9%''+$&453'")%21<$ /54$@9""4$&"5&'"$;75$;%*2$25$!"&%4%2"$27")!"'="!$/45)$ 27"$9,'+$!2"4"52+&"!$;"$>*5;$!5$;"''?$U+$&9!71*,$@9""4$ !"#$1*25$2;5$35#"!$5*$2"'"=1!15*v"127"4$27"$24%,1<$<5)0 1*,$592$!254+$54$27"$&45)1!<959!$755>9&v12$!"*.!$27"$ )"!!%,"$27%2$@9""4$&"5&'"$%4"$.1//"4"*2$/45)$F*54)%'J$ people. Indeed, according to most television shows,

@9""4$&"5&'"$7%="$*5$*54)%'$4"'%215*!71&!?$G2$!"")!$'1>"$ ;"$%4"$%''$&'%,9".$3+$594$24593'1*,$")5215*!$54$!>+071,7$ '131.5?$ D71!$ 1!$ %$ .%*,"459!$ )"!!%,"$ 25$ !"*.$ 25$ +59*,$ @9""4$>1.!$;75$+"%4*$25$!""$27"14$'1="!$4"n"<2".$1*$27"$ )".1%($%*.$12$1!$%*$"@9%''+$24593'1*,$)"!!%,"$/54$&5'1210 <1%*!$%*.$<'5!".0)1*.".$271*>"4!$;75$3"'1"="$27%2$@9""4$ &"5&'"$5*'+$!21<>$25$27"!"$592.%2".$245&"!? K71'"$ s['""s$ )%+$ 7%="$ 527"4$ &453'")%21<$ %!&"<2!$ 3527$/54$27"$@9""4$<5))9*12+$%*.$/54$527"4$)%4,1*%'0 16".$<5))9*121"!($;7"*$12$<%)"$25$!75;1*,$27"$'5="$3"0 tween two teenage sweethearts, they got it right. In sea0 !5*$g$5/ $s['""(s$27"$"&1!5."$%&&45&41%2"'+$212'".$FO14!2$ D1)"J$/5<9!"!$5*$27"$2;5$)%1*$<59&'"!$7%=1*,$!"#$/54$ 27"$ -4!2$ 21)"?$ D7"$ 5*'+$ .1//"4"*<"$ 3"2;""*$ 27"$ 2;5$ <59&'"!\$ A*"$ 1!$ !24%1,72$ %*.$ 5*"$ 1!$ ,%+?$ U527$ <59&'"!$ received equal airtime and demonstrated their sexual "#&"41"*<"!$1*$%$4"!&"<2/9'$%*.$2759,72/9'$;%+($27"4"3+$ "@9%'161*,$27"$<59&'"!$%*.$24"%21*,$27")$3527$%!$%*$1)0 &542%*2$)1'"!25*"($392$*52$%$24%,".+$54$%$<%!9%'$)5)"*2?$ w9""4$!"#$5*$DL$1!$*5$'5*,"4$27"$!75<>$27%2$12$9!".$ 25$3"?$U92$*5;($12$1!$*5$'5*,"4$%3592$)"4"'+$!""1*,$<590 &'"!$ 5*$ 2"'"=1!15*($ 12$ 1!$ %3592$ !75;1*,$ 27"$ .1="4!12+$ 5/ $ our community with accuracy. We should no longer have 25$!"22'"$/54$!2"4"52+&1<%'$25&035225)$."&1<215*!$5/ $!"#($ 54$ !"#$3"1*,$"127"4$%*$9*<5)/542%3'"$<5)1*,0592$&450 <"!!$54$%$<%!9%'$")5215*'"!!$"#&"41"*<"?$w9""4$!"#$1!$!5$ much more than that, and television should depict our experiences in a more realistic way.

Photo: Queer As Folk

X")")3"4$27%2$!<"*"$1*$s['""s$;7"*$U4122%*+$%*.$ S%*2%*%$ 254"$ "%<7$ 527"4i!$ <'527"!$ 5// $ %*.$ /9<>".$ "%<7$ 527"4$!"*!"'"!!$5*$25&$5/ $27"$,4%*.$&1%*5$1*$27"$<7514$ 455)\$A7$;%12($27%2$.1.*M2$7%&&"*?$w9""4$!"#$5*$DL$1!$ not nearly as diverse, graphic, or creative as heterosexual !"#($ %*.$ &1<>1*,$ 9&$ 5*$ 27"$ 75)5&7531<$ 1)&'1<%215*!$ .5"!$*52$2%>"$%$!9&"40!'"927?$$Z"2M!$3"$%$'122'"$)54"$&450 ,4"!!1="$%*.$."&1<2$)54"$27%*$"127"4$%$<%!9%'$755>9&$54$ %$24%,1<$<5)1*,$592$!254+$/54$@9""4$2"'"=1!15*$<7%4%<2"4!?$ FG$271*>$q2"'"=1!15*$!75;!r$)%>"$12$!"")$'1>"$q@9""4$!"#$ 1!r$ .1//"4"*2$ 27%*$ !24%1,72$ !"#($ ;7"*$ %<29%''+$ 12i!$ 27"$ !%)"$ 271*,$"#<"&2$!%)"$,"*."4!(J$!%+!$!"<5*.0+"%4$315'5,+$!290 ."*2$P"!%4$[%4<1%?$D71!$<%*$3"$&453'")%21<$3"<%9!"$@9""4$ <7%4%<2"4!$<%*$*"="4$7%="$!"#$;127592$%$3%<>$!254+($%')5!2$ %!$1/ $=1";"4!$*"".$25$3"$;%4*".$1*$%.=%*<"$27%2$27"+$%4"*M2$ !""1*,$.593'"$1/ $27"4"$%4"$2;5$&"*1!"!$4%27"4$27%*$5*"?$ D7"$<5)1*,$592$!254+$1!$'1>"'+$27"$)5!2$<'1<7y$2"'"0 =1!15*$."&1<215*$5/ $@9""4$!"#?$G*$27"$BY$!75;$sS>1*!(s$ E%5)1$%*.$u)1'+$7%="$!"#$%/2"4$-,721*,$27"14$45)%*0 21<$/""'1*,!$/54$5*"$%*527"4?$D7"14$45)%*<"$%*.$!"#9%'$ "*<59*2"4$ 1!$ %$ >"+$ &'52$ &51*2$ 1*$ 27"$ !75;($ %*.$ 27"14$ 4"'%215*!71&$1!$<5)&'1<%2".$3+$"%<7$5/ $27")$<5)1*,$25$ 2"4)!$ ;127$ 27"14$ !%)"0!"#$ %224%<215*?$ j5;"="4($ %''$ 5/ $ 27"$ 527"4$ <59&'"!$ 5*$ sS>1*!s$ 7%="$ !"#$ ;127592$ *"".0 1*,$ %$ 2"%4/9'$ .4%)%21<$ 3%<>!254+v%*.$ <4+1*,$ %2$ 27"$ 2759,72$27%2$5*"$)1,72$3"$%$'"!31%*$1!$7%4.'+$%$&45,4"!0 !1="$&5424%+%'$5/ $@9""4$!"#?$8'2759,7$<7%4%<2"4$."="'0 5&)"*2$1!$%*$1)&542%*2$&%42$5/ $%*+$5*0!<4""*$755>9&($

15 |

FIND YOUR NEXT HOOKUP HERE WILL HERDER Staff Writer | willartherd@gmail.com

SilverDaddies - dati www.silverdaddies.com

SILVERDADDIES.COM

craigslist | personals http://losangeles.craigslist.org/i/personals?categor y=m4m&SAB=wst

CRAIGSLIST.ORG

If you are looking to meet that special and sketchy sexual encounter, Craigslist.com is the website for you. Craigslist is the standard in anonymous online sex, dating and selling used stereos. Either cruise the personals, or make your own post! Just write a brief description of your wang, include a grainy mirror pic from five years ago and watch the replies roll in! When writing your post, be sure to spell the majority of words incorrectly. This conveys a sense that you are down to ear th and not concerned with formalities like punctuation or prophylactics.

So maybe daddy wasn’t around a lot when you were younger. You can find thousands of surrogate daddies to fill that hole! Silverdaddies.com is geared towards older men, and the younger men who love them. Both bears and cubs prowl these woods. There is a message limit on the free profile, so you can’t be too promiscuous with your sext, but with a little patience you will find that orgasmic geriatric.

DateHookup.com® www.datehookup.com

POF.com™ The Lea

OkCupid | Free Onli

www.okcupid.com

OKCUPID.COM AND POF.COM These free dating site offer all the excruciatingly dull compatibility sur veys of paid dating sites for none of the price! For gay and straight alike, OKcupid and POF match profiles based on responses to a series of vague and euphemistic questions. And after you have filled your profile with mind numbing minutiae about your life, you can read the mind numbing minutiae of other peoples’ lives! OKCupid’s top secret matching algorithm ranks potential mates by a Match/Friend/Enemy ratio, similar to the system used by the TSA to create the No Fly List. POF.com, or Plenty of Fish because the domain name FishMarket.com was taken, provides a matching system similar to OKcupid but with none of the cute. The site design and text is cold. Pictures and personal info are inconveniently spread out, its like ice fishing through a tiny hole on a frozen lake. If you’re a catch, there’s no use swimming around this stagnant Internet backwater. Traffic for both OKcupid.com and POF.com is declining as promiscuous Internet users crawl into the next dating website’s warm bed.

| 16

, this DR the go GRIN n o t or devian reat f g e h t s i r Fo app ext ole n phone h t r y a r m s glo yo u g the guide l l i locatin w h r indr s wit e G e . d r n o i do es al gr pp tak a otenti p s i h o t n. T the recisio ility to b a r i GPS p s y e fi l e s b phic d o a r r p g o ge se listing eet. U l e ve l , f t n x i e n ay the c e aw ce , in i f f o distan at the aptism b r ’s d n n i i Gr w cous just ho t yo u r y a , b l l d a e m pr is es are be sur buddi k c u yo u ’ l l f e e l i g i bl m a ny w a y. ches a n i y l n o

DATEHOOKUP.COM

Datehookup is the new weapon of choice in the web dater and homicidal stalker’s arsenal. There seems to be more of an emphasis on the hookup over the date on Datehookup. com. With less room for text and more room for photos and flir ty animated emoticons, you will be spending more time taking photos of your abs in the mirror and less time writing paragraphs describing your dream date. Users can, however, engage in lively discussions in the many forums without registering. The eligible LGBT pool on Datehookup.com seems limited, but the forums allow contact with a wide range of individuals (or spambots) who from all over the countr y. Hanging out in the relaxed, public atmosphere of the forums may be more fun than prowling the personal profiles.

Ashley Madison - W downlow.ashleymadison.com

DOWNLOW.ASHLEYMADISON.COM

“Life is shor t. Have an affair” urges the AshleyMadison.com slogan, a dating site for married couples looking for something on the side. The notorious AshleyMadison.com does not only help straight spouses betray their par tners, it helps gay spouses betray their beards. Downlow.AshleyMadison.com has found a way to capitalize on deep-seated psychological shame. With TV commercials and a polished website, Ashley Madison spins secrecy into a sexy novelty. Ashley Madison dilutes and defers a holistic sexual identity and social life. A line on an info screen reassures, “If A Guy Gives Me Or If you can ignore the intrusive adver tising and I Give Him A Blowjob Am I Straight? YES, you navigate the poorly configured website, Dateare NORMAL!” The page goes on to define hookup.com is a fer tile ground for romantic Heteroflexibility as “a person who enjoys ocand platonic interaction alike. casional sexual activities with members of the same sex but considers himself straight.” Surely cer tain situations necessitate secrecy, and certain individuals may even identify as “heteroflexible”, but this term and the website reek of heterosexual privilege, as if heteroflexible is Chemistr y.com™ | A Match.com® | The L eHarmony #1 Trust more butch than bisexual or bi-curious or gay. www.match.com MATCH.COM, EHARMONY.COM, CHEMISTRY.COM

So you finally landed that postgrad job at Staples and are thinking about indulging yourself by spending that twenty bucks per month to register with a legitimate pay dating site (because if you’re paying, it must be better, right?). Well congrats. I hope you find a good looking, brain surgeon soul mate and live happily ever after. Otherwise, resist the mainstream matching machine and continue living on the edge, between free sign up and monogamy.

Sex Sells INSIDE

CHI CHI LARUE'S,

A

WEHO SEX SHOP

Photo: http://www.chichilarues.com/cclrs_gal1.html

BRYAN PLATZ Managing Editor | bplatz7@gmail.com

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17 |

QUIZ

/ Your BDSM Roles Do you have a desire to dominate, a passion for punishment, or a susceptibility to submit? Take this quiz to find out what role BDSM plays in your life!

1

You are the leader of a campus organization and are holding a planning meeting. You notice that two club members, Tina and Bette, are chatting to one another and distracting the rest of the group. What do you do? a. Loudly ask, “What do you think of what I just said, Bette and Tina?” b. Politely ask them to stop talking. c. Try to ignore it. They’ll probably finish their conversation soon, anyway.

2

You come home from a long day and find your apartment a mess. When you ask your roommate who made the mess, she responds curtly, “I have no idea, but can you please clean it?! I have a friend coming over in an hour!” What do you do?

Write your answers in the blanks, and when you’re done, calculate your score for each answer! a = 50 pts b = 25 pts c = 0 pts

1___ 2 ___ = ____ points total sub

Switch

Dom[me]

a. Not clean it! It isn’t your mess, so she can fuck off. b. Ask her to help you out, since neither of you knows who made the mess. c. Clean it up because it will make your roommate happy.

0-24 points—You are submissive. You prefer to be more of a follower than a leader. You prefer a power dynamic where someone else calls the shots and you follow orders obediently. Your biggest turn-on is strict protocol.

3

It’s your birthday and you know you want to ri-i-i-ide.... When your girlfriend finally gets off work, you can’t wait to:

25-75 points—You are a switch. You sometimes enjoy letting others take control, but there are other times when you prefer to call the shots yourself.

4

It’s your one-month anniversary and your partner wakes you up with two tickets to Disneyland for the day. You are most likely to....

5

a. give her the best orgasm of her life. b. get her naked and go with the flow. c. feel totally guilt-free about her pleasing you.

a. sheepishly accept, despite feeling secretly bummed that your gift for your par tner isn’t as exciting as their gift for you. b. give your par tner a huge hug and kiss, and reiterate how excited you are to spend the day together! c. scream with excitement and jump out of bed to pack!

You and your BFF are in the same class. You spent all of last night cramming and know your BFF didn’t even look over the midterm material. Right before the test, she asks if you can sit together so she can ‘check answers’ against your test. Knowing that she will likely copy off your entire test, what do you do? a. Say, “Sure! I want you to do well!” despite feeling frustrated that you put in way more work than she did. b. Say, “OK, whatever,” but finish your test early so she doesn’t get too much time to look. c. Say, “I don’t know.... I don’t want to get caught.”

6

You are a strict vegetarian and you have been in a relationship for a while with your loving boyfriend. He invites you to his parents house for dinner and his mother beams while offering you a huge plate of traditional cuisine from his culture, but you notice chunks of meat in the dish. When your boyfriend looks at you pleadingly, you are most likely to... a. Eat every drop with a huge smile, because you love your boyfriend and respect his parents. b. Take the plate, but subtly eat around the meat. c. Politely refuse the dish and ask your boyfriend to tell his family that you do not eat meat, but thanks anyway.

| 18

76-100 points—You are dominant. You prefer to be in control. You would rather call the shots and make the decisions yourself and expect others to follow your lead without question. Your biggest turn on is power.

3___ Bottom

4___ = ____ points total Switch

Top

0-24 points—You are a bottom. You prefer to receive than to give, and do so happily. 25-75 points—You are a switch. You like to give and receive. Variety is the spice of life! 76-100 points—You are a top. You prefer to give than to receive.

5___

6___ = ____ points total

Masochist

Not

0-24 points—You are not a masochist. You are not turned on by making a sacrifice of your own physical/psychological comfor t for someone else. 25-75 points—You are somewhat masochistic. You might enjoy some pain if it can lead to someone’s happiness, but you wouldn’t want to take it too far. 76-100 points—You are a masochist. This means you enjoy receiving pain, especially if it leads to someone else’s pleasure.

Photo: Priapus (priapus@photosbypriapus.com)

7

You are a yoga instructor leading an extremely difficult class and notice many of your participants struggling with the intense workout. You are most likely to... a. Smile to your self and think, “Damn, I’m giving these people their money’s wor th!” b. Remind yourself that they can stop anytime they want to give up, and tr y to ignore the moans of pain. c. Say, “Whenever anyone needs a break, feel free to rest in a comfor table position.”

8

You are in discussion section and have a very nerdy and shy TA who always seems extremely nervous. When finished explaining a problem, the TA asks if there are any questions but looks at the board rather than the students, cluing you in to the fact that he is probably not knowledgeable enough on the problem to answer any questions. However, you notice a fairly basic error in his calculation that led to a wrong answer. You are most likely to...

7___

8___ = ____ points total

Sadist

Not

0-24 points—You are not a sadist. You are not turned on by causing physical or psychological pain. 25-75 points—You are somewhat sadistic. You may occasionally enjoy giving some physical or psychological pain, but nothing too intense. 76-100 points—You are a sadist. You are turned on by giving physical or psychological pain and enjoy making others work hard for your admiration.

a. Loudly point out his mistake—he should be on top of the material if he is a TA, so if he is not knowledgeable about the subject, you shouldn’t feel bad calling him out and watching him squirm. b. Raise your hand and politely ask if he made a “small mistake.” c. Let it go. Why point out his mistake if you understand the problem yourself?

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