June 18 :: Cheers!

JUNE 18, 2014

! s r e Che PRIDE 2014: CELEBRATE IN STYLE

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CONTENTS

VOLUME 38

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ISSUE 6

! s r e Che PRIDE 2014: CELEBRATE IN STYLE

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JUNE 18, 2014

10 From the Publisher 12 Fostering Gay Youth 14 Fired for Filing?

Local man’s harassment case ends up in termination 16 Panic in the Park 20 Hiking Colorado 22 Frenchie Davis: The Comeback Queen 24 PrideFest Headliner Hotties 26 Denver Hotties: Bartender Edition 30 Calendar 33 Legal Directory 34 Cuisine 36 Arts & Culture 38 Proud, Prideful, Prepared: Reflections on Pride 40 Fashion 41 Beauty 44 Marketplace 48 Radioactive Vision 50 Bar Tab 52 Marijuana Review: Edibles 54 Sexuality & Relationships 56 Outback Classifieds

ABOUT OUR COVER

ABOUT OUR CO NTR IBU TO RS Jay Duque is Out Front’s Marketing & Events Coordinator. Jay is an Army combat veteran who’s lived in 3 countries, and 6 U.S. states; but has called Colorado home for almost 9 years now. Jay loves the outdoors, and everything Colorado has to offer. Don’t be afraid to say hi if you see him out!

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Jordan Jacobs is Out Front’s Senior Marketing Executive. He’s been with Out Front for 2 years helping businesses and organizations connect with the gay community in Colorado.

Photography: Chad Chisholm, Custom Creations Photography Art Direction: Colby Brumit Hair and makeup: Jenece Amella Location: Oxford Hotel Model: Mason D., Wilhelmina Denver Wardrobe: Moda Man Men’s Fashion Cover: Cotton & linen coat by Ross Grasion, $475.00; Shirt by Stone Rose, $185.00; Tan Ceramica pant by Alberto, $245.00 Above: White linen coat by Ross Grasion, $495.00; Shirt

by International Laundry, $165.00; Black Ceramica pant by Alberto, $245.00

Serving the LGBT Community of the Rocky Mountains since 1976 3535 Walnut Street, Denver, Colorado 80205 Phone: 303-477-4000 • Fax: 303-325-2642 Email: info@outfrontonline.com Web: OutFrontOnline.com Facebook: facebook.com/OutFrontColorado Twitter: @OutFrontCO Instagram: /OutFrontColorado Out Front is published by Transformation Communications Group, LLC, a Colorado limited liability corporation and is a member of: Denver Gay & Lesbian Chamber of Commerce and Denver Drama Critics Circle.

FOUNDE R PHIL PRICE, 1954-1993 A DMI NI STRATION JERRY CUNNINGHAM Publisher • Jerry@outfrontonline.com J.C. MCDONALD Vice President • JC@outfrontonline.com RYAN KING Associate Publisher • Ryan@outfrontonline.com ERIN ANDERSON Administrative Coordinator • Erin@outfrontonline.com JEFF JACKSON SWAIM Chief Strategist • Jeff@outfrontonline.com E DI TORI AL BERLIN SYLVESTRE Editor • Berlin@outfrontonline.com ROB BARGER Digital Content Manager • Rob@outfrontonline.com CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Lauren Archuletta, Elizabeth Barron, Brent Heinze, Brian Henderson, Carly Holbrook, Noah L. Jordan, Shanna Katz, Kailyn Lamb, Kelsey Lindsey, Scott McGlothlen Jeffrey Steen, Nuclia Waste, Mike Yost and Kristin Ziegler MA RK ETING & SALES JORDAN JACOBS Senior Marketing Executive • Jordan@outfrontonline.com DUSTIN KRIER Marketing Executive • Dustin@outfrontonline.com JAY DUQUE Marketing & Events Coordinator • Jay@outfrontonline.com COLE RUFFCORN • Digital Marketing Intern JASMINE THOMPSON • Marketing Intern NATIONAL ADVERTISING Rivendell Media / 212-242-6863 • sales@rivendellmedia.com ART COLBY BRUMIT Art Director • Colby@outfrontonline.com CONTRIBUTING ARTISTS & PHOTOGRAPHERS Laura Baccus, Charles Broshous, Chad Chisholm, and Hans Rosemond

New LGBT Program Debuts in Denver!

Thank you to our Founding Donors for making the first contributions Elizabeth Bryant Margaret Burd Amy Drayer & Erin Atwell Christopher Genry Nancy Kearney D. Lance King Rick Kramer The Larned A. Waterman & Paul S. Mesard Family Charitable Lead Trust Fund of The Denver Foundation Christopher K. M. Leach Christopher Massey & James Davis John McGowan & Dave Robbins Neil D. O’Toole Christopher J. Ott, M.D. & Jeremy Simons Katherine Peck Kathy L. Seidel Ted Trimpa David H. Wagner, Ph.D. Marla J. Williams Martin Yussman, M.D.

Be a part of an exciting development in the LGBT community — The Liberty Community Fund of Colorado.

This community-based effort is raising money for programs to create an environment where LGBT individuals and their families enjoy the full freedoms, equal opportunities and the same quality of life as their friends and neighbors.

Community First Foundation generously matched the first $50,000 raised. Now, we invite you to make a donation and be a part of this community effort.

Visit http://coloradogives.org/LibertyFundColorado2014 to learn more.

Fund Advisory Board Elizabeth Bryant, EAB Law Cheryl Haggstrom, Community First Foundation D. Lance King, Gill Foundation Christopher K. M. Leach, Contract Furnishings Carlos Martinez, Latino Community Foundation of Colorado Christopher Massey, NBH Bank John McGowan, Northern Trust Christopher J. Ott, M.D., St. Anthony Hospital Marla J. Williams, Community First Foundation Kathy L. Seidel, Northern Trust David H. Wagner, Ph.D, University of Colorado, Denver

DI ST RI B UTION

Out Front Colorado’s print publication is available semi-monthly, free of charge in Colorado, one copy per person. Additional copies of Out Front Colorado may be purchased for $3.95 each, payable in advance at Out Front Colorado offices located at 3535 Walnut Street, Denver CO, 80205. Out Front Colorado is delivered only to authorized distributors. No person may, without prior written permission of Out Front Colorado, take more than one copy of Out Front Colorado. Any person who takes more than one copy may be held liable for theft, including but not limited to civil damages and or criminal prosecution.

COPY RI GHT & LIMIT OF L IAB IL ITY

Reproduction of editorial, photographic or advertising content without written consent of the publisher is strictly prohibited. Advertisers are responsible for securing rights to any copyrighted material within their advertisements. Publisher assumes no responsibility for the claims of advertisers and reserves the right to reject any advertising.

Publication of the name or photograph of any person or organization in articles or advertising is not to be considered an indication of the sexual orientation or HIV status of such person or organization. Publisher assumes no responsibility for the loss or damage of materials submitted. OPINIONS EXPRESSED are not necessarily those of OUT FRONT COLORADO, its staff or advertisers.

Community First Foundation 6870 W. 52nd Avenue, Suite 103 Arvada, Colorado 80002 720.898.5900 CommunityFirstFoundation.org BRAND NEW @ OUTFRONTONLINE.COM

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FROM THE PUBLISHER

RED CARPET RECOGNITION SOMETIMES INSPIRATION COMES IN THE LEAST EXPECTED PLACES. Well that’s what Out Front hopes to deliver this year at PrideFest. It is our Take for instance “The Secret Life of Walter Mitty,” starring and directed hope that all who cross our red carpet will step off knowing they’ve been acknowledged for who they are and what they stand for.

by Ben Stiller. (Risky business to star in the movie you’re directing, no?) But the movie was absolutely perfect to me. Ok, there’s Assuming you’re like the majority of us, living life one exception: the awkward Benjamin Button parody and secretly wishing (maybe even yearning) to be that felt a touch too absurdist for me, but I digress. singled out and recognized for what you do or who “The Secret Life of Walter Mitty” is an amazing film, you are, you understand that (for whatever reason) it mainly for the underlying message it delivers: Be in just feels good to be validated by others. We’re born the moment and take in the beauty it has to offer. with an intrinsic need for reassurance and approval, Poignant. and being acknowledged by others helps us feel secure So there I am watching Sean Penn raise his head and, consequently, more comfortable inside ourselves. from an expensive camera to watch a snow leopard Being recognized and acknowledged bolsters our on a mountainside, not snapping away like an excited belief of being desirable, valuable, and esteemable.

In a word, special. Pride is all of that wrapped up in photographer, but experiencing it like a reverent one fun-filled weekend. human … and I get goose bumps thinking how I too So I encourage you to stop by Out Front’s booth cherish moments like that in my life. I was moved to tears with epiphany. The movie is an absurdly funny, this year for the red carpet treatment. Some of the yet fable-worthy story of a daydreamer who escapes highlights include free backpacks, paparazzi, and his humdrum life by slipping into a world of fantasies plenty of free gift cards. And then, come Monday, once filled with heroism, romance, and action. And when all of the glitter and pride-remains have been swept his lifelong, rather dull job is on the line, Walter jumps from the streets of downtown Denver, I encourage out of his fantasies and into a real-world journey that you to bring the meaning of the red carpet back into turns into an adventure more extraordinary than your day-to-day life. Acknowledgement of others is anything he could have ever imagined — one that a powerful and often difficult skill to embrace and would make anyone’s Match.com profile irresistible. employ, but it’s a discipline worth honing. Taking the Jerry Cunningham, Publisher & (Inside joke. Watch the movie.) The movie ends with time to roll out the red carpet for others, then sharing J.C. McDonald, Vice President a powerful scene of unfettered acknowledgement of a kind word of acknowledgement truly has the power a life well spent. Truly, a must see! of transforming the world we live in, which is why It’s funny how the universe works serendipitously sometimes; it seems this year’s theme is so important to us. to always provide insight and guidance in life if you just take the time to Here’s to all you “Walter Mittys” out there having a memorable and look and listen. Here we are on the eve of our busiest season, Pride, and Out magical 2014 Pride!

Front’s theme this year? The red carpet! A message with a literal translation that fits nicely with the glamourous world of Hollywood and is frankly the subplot of all Prides, right?!

The very culmination of Walter Mitty’s secret life is acknowledgement, and acknowledgement is what makes red carpet events so magical and memorable. Amid the fluttering of camera lenses and the popping of flashbulbs, there’s a moment where our very existence is acknowledged by others. This is what we all want our Pride to be … magical, memorable.

Jerry Cunningham, Publisher

The new outfrontonline.com is here.

Fully responsive coverage of all things LGBT Colorado: news, culture, nightlife, sports & more.

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Friday:

Saturday:

Sunday:

Budlight Buddy Beer Bust 5pm-8pm $10

Budlight Beer Bust 2pm-5pm $5

$5 Sunday Brunch

$3 absolut Special 7-Close

$3 Smirnoff 7-Close

watch the parade from our grandstands!

Budlight Beer Bust 4pm-8pm $5 $1 Budlight drafts 8pm-Close $3 Stoli all day

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Fostering Gay Youth Local advocate S.E. Rafferty is raising funds to launch Home O’ Hope, a project to establish a safe place for LGBT youth in foster care, many of whom endure high levels of discrimination and neglect. back and snicker when I had people over.”

According to Child Welfare Information Gateway nnette Thomas was a 17-year-old high school (CWIG), five to 10 percent of the 175,000 youth in student living in Portland, Tennessee, a small the U.S. foster care system are LGBTQ. CWIG cited a 2009 study revealing 56 percent of LGBTQ foster town about 40 miles northeast of Nashville. One day, while talking on the phone with her friend kids have been homeless at some point, feeling safer about a girl she was dating, there was a knock on on the streets than living with a foster care family the bedroom door. or in a group home.

“My foster mom said, ‘When you’re done with “It was hard that one statement can make a difthat phone call, I need to talk to you,’” says Annette. ference in how a person is treated,” she says of being “She pulled out the Bible and started giving me found out. “I was not acting rebellious, I was not the lecture: I was going to Hell if I continued down harming anybody. I was working, going to school, enjoying prom, enjoying friends. I had a girlfriend that path. She didn’t want me to have any more — just normal teenage stuff.” association with my girlfriend or my best friend, who was gay.”

Unfortunately Annette’s experiences are frequent, Castigated for having a girlfriend and isolated as S. E. Rafferty, co-founder of Home O’ Hope (HOH) from her friends, Annette became severely deexplains. “Foster kids have experienced upwards pressed and attempted suicide, landing her in a of 10 transitions if they are an adolescent — either going back and forth between the system and their psychiatric hospital. Her parents then sent her to a Christian counselor who specialized in conversion own home, or between homes within the system.

ANNETTE THOMAS therapy, a controversial treatment that attempts to And that’s non-LGBT youth. You put the LGBT part in there, sometimes that number will double.” change a person’s sexual orientation.

Rafferty, who has a graduate degree in counselBut Annette refused to reject her identity as a ing psychology and is a licensed addiction counselor, decided to launch lesbian, so her foster parents kicked her out of the house. “It was the place HOH after witnessing two foster kids living in a group home come out of I called home. I would never have imagined with the revelation that I was the closet. gay, I wouldn’t be welcome in my own home.”

Annette was moved into a group house for foster youth. “I was the “One of them was 13 years old, he came out as bisexual. The other was 17 years old, he came out as gay,” says Rafferty. “As a means of trying to protect the kids only gay person there, so it was kind of awkward,” she says. “I didn’t feel and trying to protect the home, the two kids were treated like sex offenders. e comfortable bringing my girlfriend over — people would talk behind my Mike Yost

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They couldn’t even watch television without staff supervision if they were [around] another kid.”

Rafferty adds that the treatment from the staff came from a stark deficiency in training and experience regarding the needs of LGBT youth. “I know, at the heart of it, the hope was to protect [the kids], but there was also a lack of education on the part of the professionals.”

The situation grew worse as other youths in the home began to bully the two kids who came out. “The kids started to feel like something was wrong with them,” says Rafferty. “ They were simply going through normal sexual development like all the other kids.”

In 2008, Rafferty decided to create a place where LGBT foster youth could be themselves. She began raising money for HOH along with co-founder Amy Winchester, also a licensed professional counselor.

One of the first challenges was, and still is, securing a home big enough to house up to eight foster kids and staff. “We started right when the housing market crashed,” says Rafferty, “and now that the housing market has started to boom, it’s out of our price range.”

There have been fundraisers for the project with contributors such as the Colorado Gay Rodeo Association. “If we had between $10,000 and $15,000 more, we could be open within three months,” says Rafferty.

HOH would be different from other foster care homes in many ways, to create a therapeutic environment for the residents. “Because Amy and I are both professionals in this field, the staff would be trained on how they interact with kids therapeutically. We will allow LGBT kids to have their sexuality or gender transition be a non-issue.”

Another goal for HOH is to start a mentoring program within the home. “It really does take a village to raise every kid, and with a project like this, the village is community.”

For Annette, a project such as HOH would have made all the difference. “You need to hear that it’s okay,” she says. “Depression, isolation, suicide — these are things that go through a young person’s mind when they’re rejected for their sexuality. It’s even worse to try and change who they are through Christian counseling.”

Annette now lives in Loveland and shares her story with others in the hope that LGBT kids in the foster care system won’t have to endure what she went through.

“Being kicked out of my foster home because I came out was very traumatizing. I still live with the pain of that rejection 26 years later,” says Annette. “I think this project can make a difference in a teenager’s life — in a teenager’s future.”  To learn more, visit Home-O-Hope.org

AIDS WALK COLORADO: REGISTRATION IS OPEN! AIDS Walk Colorado is the Rocky Mountain Region’s largest and most successful HIV and AIDS fundraiser. This year’s festivities include the Walk, a 5K run, a volleyball tournament, the Celebration of Life Festival, and, of course, the Diva Dash Stiletto Fun Run! It all happens in Cheesman Park on Saturday, August 16.

RED ROCKS AMPHITHEATRE

AUGUST 27 8:00PM

You can register and fundraise as an individual or a team, or volunteer along the course. Get involved, meet new friends, and have a blast at this important event.

BRAND NEW @ OUTFRONTONLINE.COM

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Fired for Filing?

Holder: Boy Scouts’ ban on gay adults ‘perpetuates worst kind of stereotypes’

department of the company claiming he caused a scene in the store that affected the customers JORDAN CALLEN was tired of having his sex life and employees — a claim he vehemently denies. put on blast by the woman at work.

The email served as his official termination letter.

He tells Out Front that even before they’d been “Every single day, I dealt with these abrasive interactions,” he says, his eyebrows furrowing at formally introduced to everyone at his new job at the recollection. “It was humiliating. And when Kindman, a recreational marijuana dispensary, I spoke up about it, they found a way to fire me.” his sexuality was the topic of discussion for the woman he would eventually file a sexual harassJordan filed an employee discrimination comment complaint against. Some of his coworkers plaint with the Colorado Department of Human claim they were pulled in on a conversation that Services, a task he claims Kindman had an obligaincluded whispers of homosexuality and confution to fulfill. “As far as I know, I’m the only one sion over his wedding ring. He tells us he was who filed.” The official complaint form he slid oblivious to her intrusiveness until the first time across the table to me had four checked boxes: she addressed him: retaliation, harassment/hostile work environment, “My husband is cheating on me with a man. sexual harassment, and sexual orientation.

I mean, he’s bisexual. Does Jordan claims that not that turn you on?” only was he fired, but his Embarrassed and offshifts were given to the alleged aggressor. Weeks put, he noted the incident in his daily journal under later, he received a phone February 3, 2014. This call from a man claiming to would mark the first of be an investigator contacted several discomforting

by Kindman to look into a recent string of breakencounters with a woman ins and vandalism at the who took great liberties addressing the 28-year-old’s store. Red flags went up for Jordan. “I asked him if he’d sexual orientation. Five days later, he was unloading contacted anyone else. He safes with her and: “God! said, ‘Don’t worry about me.

F*cking homos are always in Worry about yourself,’ then JORDAN CALLEN the way!” Perhaps jokingly hung up. I honestly believe said — or perhaps not — it this is just continued harassstill didn’t sit well and into the journal it went. ment because I filed with the state.” He rifles In a later incident, he was called into the office through his folder. “But this is the single-most of the store and questioned about his threats powerful piece of paper I have,” he said, brandishagainst the woman. Caught off guard, he confessed ing a final document. “It’s powerful in the sense to his manager that he wasn’t sure what exactly she that it’s holding me back from housing, medicine, was talking about, and the incident was brushed and transportation.” off, he says, with a simple: “Maybe it’s because I have to ask what exactly it is, apart from you’re gay; she doesn’t like you because you’re a few deposit notices printed from an accounting system. “That’s what they gave me gay.” And that was that.

As though infectious, another co-worker caught when I asked for my pay stubs and W2.” He is on that it was seemingly permissible to chide the visibly frustrated. gay guy at work. “The general manager got a good “I can’t take this to any financial assistance laugh when another employee called me a fluffer,” agency,” he says with urgency. “My fiance has he says. “I laughed a little, too, because I didn’t brain cancer and needs chemo and seizure know what it was. Now that I know, it upsets me medication — we can’t access any of those without how inappropriate a remark it was.” paperwork.” In addition, apartment complexes Still frustrated with the actions of the emboldwon’t let him apply without proper documentation ened woman, and hoping something would be and he can’t trade in his car for another without his pay stubs from Kindman. “I’m asked at every done about the behavior at Kindman, Jordan filed an internal complaint against the presumptuous turn to prove household income. I need the ability co-worker. to prove my financial situation to a creditor, which In a Youtube video entitled “Kindman Sexual is done with check stubs.”

Harassment,” Jordan is seen hand-delivering the Jordan claims that attempts to retrieve the notice of sexual harassment to the manager of items he needs are repeatedly met with resistance.

Kindman’s human resources department. He asks “They had security turn me away when I showed her if she realizes that it’s against the law for his up in person. I’m desperate for the paperwork and alleged aggressor to continue working during a have no idea what I’m going to do.” sexual harassment investigation.

As of late, Jordan is selling everything he “If we’re both not allowed here, we’re both not owns to make ends meet, from his aquariums allowed here. You know that?” to his car. He hopes that Kindman will supply “Yeah. Yeah I do,” she replies. him not only with the documentation of his If his aim was a discontinuance of unacceptformer employment with the company, but also able behavior, it failed miserably. In fact, Jordan a written apology and, with any luck, compenbelieves it made his situation worse. A short sation for the time he’s been out of work for time later, he received an email from the HR wrongful termination. 

U.S. Attorney General Eric Holder took aim at the Boy Scouts of America on June 10, saying its refusal to allow gay and lesbian adults to serve as scout leaders “perpetuates the worst kind of stereotypes.”

In remarks prepared for delivery at an event hosted by Lambda Legal, Holder called the ban “a relic of an age of prejudice and insufficient understanding.”

Referencing the repeal of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell,” Holder said that “courageous lesbian, gay, and bisexual individuals routinely put their lives on the line” in the U.S. armed forces, and that “if these men and women are fit for military service, then surely they are fit to mentor, to teach, and to serve as role models for the leaders of future generations.”

Last year, the Boy Scouts of America’s national council voted to allow openly gay youths to join the organization, but has maintained its prohibition on gay adult leaders.

Former Defense Secretary Robert Gates, who helped oversee the repeal of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell,” and now serves as president of the Boy Scouts, said in a recent interview with the Associated Press that he would have allowed gay adult scout leaders, but that he opposes any further attempts to address the policy now.

Holder said Tuesday that “the continuation of a policy that discriminates against gay adult leaders by an iconic American institution only preserves and perpetuates the worst kind of stereotypes.”

Holder earlier delivered remarks at the Justice Department’s LGBT Pride Month Celebration, noting that “in recent years, and even in the last 12 months, our nation has made extraordinary strides to overcome obstacles and institutional biases that too often affect gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender individuals.” 

Local man’s harassment case ends up in termination Berlin Sylvestre

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AMA advises surgery should not be a requirement for birth certificate changes This month, the American Medical Association said transgender people should be able to switch the sex designation on their birth certificates without having sex-change surgery.

Most states make the operations a prerequisite, but a new AMA policy acknowledges that gender identity doesn’t always match a person’s birth anatomy.

An AMA report says identification documents that are consistent with gender identity rather than anatomy are essential to basic social and economic functioning.

The report also says patients deserve medical care that is appropriate to their birth anatomy even if they self-identify as the opposite sex.

The new policy, adopted at the AMA’s annual meeting in Chicago, won praise from the National Center for Transgender Equality.

“The AMA’s support for eliminating surgery requirements to update their birth certificate will send a strong message to states that lag behind on these policies,” Mara Keisling, the group’s executive director, said in written statement. “Currently only five states and the District of Columbia have modernized their policies to make it clear that surgery is not required to update a birth certificate.

“Transgender people should not be required to have any specific, costly medical treatments in order to carry the accurate and consistent ID we all need to function every day in the United States.”  Reports from lgbtqnation.com

June 20–Aug. 2, 2014 exploring the limits oF agility and strength Featuring work by: Melissa Jay Craig, Jennifer Ghormley, Anne Hallam, Bovey Lee, Diane Martonis, Dawn McFadden, Liz Miller, Mia Pearlman and Susan Porteous

Center for VisuAl Art

msudenver.edu/cva

965 sAntA fe DriVe DenVer, Co 80204

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C I N PA

E H T AT

!

K R PA

Noah L. Jordan

W

hile we may be a far cry from New York’s Greenwich Village or San Francisco’s Castro, Colorado has put its stamp on more than few LGBT firsts. “Dynasty” (set in Denver) featured Steven Carrington, one of the first gay characters on television; the “Former Sex Change Capital of the World” was in Trinidad; and we have a bar scene that drew hordes of homosexuals from across the country back in the 1970s. This year, Denver adds to that list by making PrideFest the first festival in Colorado to participate in America’s PrepareAthon!, a national emergency preparedness movement.

While you worry about where you’re going to get your next drink or meet your future ex, there’s an entire team planning for situations where shit may hit the fan. And while dehydration and heat exhaustion are the most common emergencies, here are a few “it could happen … ish” scenarios and how they might be handled, according to Daniel Nyquist (FEMA region VIII community preparedness officer) and Heather Camerer (Denver PrideFest events manager).

Scenario One: A freak Colorado wind is ripping through the area and stuff is flying everywhere!

Daniel: Late spring and early summer weather in Colorado can be unpredictable and unstable. The number one thing you can do to stay alert? Keep an eye on the sky. When you see a storm rolling in at an outdoor festival, start thinking about where you’ll seek shelter in the event that lightning, hail, or high winds develop. If you’re caught outside and can’t find a place to shelter indoors, find a low, flat location to lie down in and cover your head. Flying debris and lightning strikes are the biggest risks in situations like these. Avoid sheltering under tents or temporary structures because the risk of collapse in these conditions is high. Another risk that can come with severe spring and summer weather in Denver is street flooding. Never walk through moving water during a flash flood — even six inches of moving water can be deadly. e

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it. In a scenario like this, Civic Center Park and the surrounding area would likely be evacuated, so pay attention to instructions from first responders and festival staff. It’s important to stay calm.

Scenario Two: An unidentified individual has left a suspicious package near in the middle of Civic Center Park and called in a bomb threat.

Heather: Hosting a safe and secure festival is our top priority. We have a very strong partnership with Denver’s Office of Emergency Management and local law enforcement agencies and we all work proactively to prevent emergencies and protect the safety of our guests. In any situation where we think the safety and security of the festival may be compromised, we would work with these same agencies to determine the best course of action. In short, don’t panic. We’ve got this.

Scenario Three: A trashcan fire spread to a booth which spread to a tree and now the parks is a ablaze!

Daniel: You can definitely be saved from a wildfire! We generally don’t see wildfires in the urban core, but it’s certainly not out of the realm of possibilities to see one in a park space. If you see any kind of fire break out during the festival, call 911.

Don’t assume that someone else has already done

F E AT U R E D P E T S

PUFF – ID# 674370 I’m a lovable, sweet 7-year-old Terrier mix. I am friendly with children and other dogs. My shelter friends say I love attention. With your love and care, I can be a wonderfully loyal friend!

Scenario Four: A high-speed chase has made its way onto the parade route!

Heather: We work closely with the Denver Police Department in all aspects of our festival operations, including traffic management along the parade route. If an emergency situation like this were to arise, we would simply rely on guidance from our law enforcement partners.

Extreme emergencies are very rare, and ultimately a great PrideFest experience buckles down to the basics. We can’t stress enough that guests should take some common-sense actions like drinking plenty of water, wearing sunscreen, and drinking alcohol responsibly. Doing these simple things will help everyone to stay safe and have a great time. So be smart and essentially we can all have the best PrideFest ever! Well … at least until next year. 

JAGGER – ID# 373437 Rock on to the shelter and check out my moves! I’m Jagger, a superstar of a cat who is eight years old and weighs more than 14 pounds. I’m a big, well-mannered guy who hopes his best move is right into your home and heart.

Dumb Friends League • DDFL.org 2080 S Quebec St. • (303) 751-5772

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AROUND THE NATION

THE QUEEN CITY OF THE PLAINS, DENVER

Top 10 Most LGBT-Friendly Cities in America N

erd Wallet’s been crunching the numbers all year to bring us the latest stats in LGBT news. Using the HRC’s municipal equality index, combined with the percentage of LGBT households and number of hate crimes per capita, we’re proud to present the 10 most friendly, happening places we can be ourselves in.

1. SEATTLE, WASHINGTON Seattle is home to the highest percentage of same-sex households of all the major U.S. cities, and gay marriage is legal in the state of Washington.

Further, the city has an equality index of 100 and a relatively low rate of sexual orientation-related hate crimes. One of several organizations that help the LGBT population in Seattle is Families Like Ours, which aims to serve traditional and nontraditional families wishing to adopt or foster children.

2. SAN FRANCISCO, CALIFORNIA San Francisco is known as one of the nation’s most gay-friendly cities, thanks to its large LGBT population and overall diversity and progressiveness. The San Francisco LGBT Community Center connects the city’s diverse community to opportunities and resources to foster a better environment for LGBT people.

3. ATLANTA, GEORGIA The only southeast city among the top ten, Atlanta ranked highly due to its perfect equality score and low rate of LGBT hate crimes. The Atlanta Gay & Lesbian Chamber of Commerce promotes economic growth and development of LGBT and allied business and non-profit members in the community.

4. OAKLAND, CALIFORNIA This Bay Area city is home to a diverse population, including a sizeable LGBT community. Oakland also features many LGBT-focused groups, including Oakland Pride, which promotes equality and celebrates the culture and diversity of the LGBT community in the East Bay Area.

5. LONG BEACH, CALIFORNIA Long Beach earned the highest possible equality score from the HRC and the city sees fewer LGBT-targeted hate crimes per 100,000 residents than most other places in the country. The Greater Long Beach LGBTQ Center provides education and assistance to the local community in an effort to advocate for equality and fight intolerance based on sexual orientation or gender.

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6. MINNEAPOLIS, MINNESOTA Minneapolis hosts the third highest share of same-sex households of all cities (behind Seattle and San Francisco) and boasts an equality index of 100. The state of Minnesota legalized gay marriage in May 2013. Twin Cities Pride is a local LGBT interest group that exists to foster inclusion and increase awareness.

7. AUSTIN, TEXAS Austin, which has grown to become a major cultural hub in Texas, boasts the lowest rate of sexual orientation-related hate crimes of all top ten cities.

The Austin Gay & Lesbian Chamber of Commerce supports the economic growth and success of local LGBT businesses and organizations.

8. JERSEY CITY, NEW JERSEY Jersey City boasts a low number of LGBT hate crimes and a perfect equality score in a state that has been recognizing same-sex marriage since October 2013. The Hudson Pride Connections Center is a local non-profit that advocates for the well-being of the region’s LGBT residents.

9. ST. PAUL, MINNESOTA Thanks to a high equality index and a low rate of sexual orientation-related hate crimes, St. Paul joins its Twin City (Minneapolis) among the ten most LGBT-friendly cities.

10. CHICAGO, ILLINOIS Illinois began recognizing same-sex marriage on June 1, 2014 thanks to a law signed by its governor last November. Chicago is home to the Center on Halsted, one of the largest LGBT-focused community and advocacy centers in the Midwest. The city also celebrates Pride Month by hosting nearly 100 different social, cultural, athletic and political events throughout June.

12. DENVER, COLORADO Yes, we said top 10. Yes, we skipped 11. No, we’re not sorry. Check it out: Denver has a score of 99 out of 100 on the equality index; 1.3 percent of same-sex partners; and 1.89 sexual orientation-related hate crimes per 100,000 residents. Denver has higher LGBT-friendly ratings than cities like New York, which ranked 15, and Los Angeles, which ranked 18. Take that.

Go Broncs and Happy PrideFest! 

PANEL: Has gay youth become lackadaisical in the fight for LGBT rights?

T

he answer is definitely yes. Spoiled by the deplorable U.S. education system and by their blissfully ignorant parents, young LGBTs think that all they need to do in life is breathe. Clearly that will George Gramer, Jr. not suffice.

Younger gays have not seen nor known the struggles of the past decades.

They are not witting to the fact that LGBT people have been beaten, gone to jail, and died — just for being gay.

With so many liberal justices ruling against state laws and in favor of same-sex marriage, many LGBT youth think their future will be a gilded generation. They could not be more mistaken.

Of course it is worse elsewhere — you dare not be gay in most Islamic countries or you will be killed. Still, many young LGBT do not know Iran from Arvada, nor strongly anti-gay Muslim African countries from Aurora. Gay youth are indifferent to the oppression of the Sharia world — and they better be worried — they could easily be killed in a future scenario.

I am afraid that gay youth in Colorado often just believe everything for them is on a silver platter. They could not be more wrong.

Iowa native George Gramer, Jr. is president of the Colorado Log Cabin Republicans.

I

’ve had the opportunity to study, write about, and interview some of the original movers and shakers of the LGBT movement who were fighting every day just for the right to exist in peace.

I don’t want that fight. I Pieter Tolsma am thankful, but I have no desire to be sworn at, beaten up, or prosecuted in the name of LGBT rights. The only reason I have been able to live more freely than they is because I stand on the shoulders of these giants, and I am truly grateful.

I don’t have to worry every day when I walk out my door and I don’t have to look over my shoulder constantly when I am out alone. While I have been beaten up and hospitalized in an antigay attack, I realize that I am an outlier and am thankful that most others will never experience that. Is the LGBT youth getting lazy? If they are, it’s a luxury that so many have fought for them to have. The goal was that one day we could live our lives as regular people, and while we are not quite there yet, we are closer than ever before.

We have finally reached a place of normalization where we don’t have to carry picket signs all the time and travel in packs out of necessity and that is luxury of which we can be proud.

Pieter Tolsma is program coordinator of Denver PIQUE, a sexual health and social support program for gay/bi men in Denver.

L

GBTQ youth and allies are alive and well in Denver and beyond. Their voice may be seen as weak, small, and unaware, yet I can promise you it is anything but. Groups that exist within the LGBTQ sphere, like the Colorado Alison Wisneski Anti-Violence Program and their fully youth-led project, Branching Seedz of Resistance (BSEEDZ), work to give voice to all forms of anti-violence within the LGBTQ world.

Beyond that, with LGBTQ groups working within circles that encompass youth, such as Urban Peak, Rainbow Alley, and Inside/Out Youth Services, we’re seeing youth be valued and given the voice they’ve always had — a voice that we need to take heed of, because this is the voice of our very near future of LGBTQ leadership in businesses, nonprofits, and governments alike.

Alison Wisneski is pursuing an MA in Social Change from the Iliff School of Theology. She focuses on relationship building and organizing those to rally around LGBTQ visibility and equality, currently within the United Methodist Church.

Got something to say? Join the conversation.

Interested in joining our panelists? Want to respond to a story or pitch a story of your own?

Email editorial@outfrontonline.com for more info.

BRAND NEW @ OUTFRONTONLINE.COM

| JUNE 18, 2014 | 19

HIKING COLORADO

Wake Up and Smell the Wildflowers Carly Holbrook

C

oming off a winter season of heavy snowfall, vibrant wildflowers are replacing the snow, making this summer the perfect time to enjoy the outdoors and lush flora of Colorado. As the trails dry, a hike is one of the best ways to get up-close and personal with the state’s huge array of colorful blooms.

Keep this guide handy and do some of your own sampling of Colorado’s wildflower hikes and experiences.

ALPINE LOOP SCENIC BYWAY Lake City, Silverton & Ouray To view Colorado’s magnificent wildflowers in the state’s true wilderness, look no further than the Alpine Loop Scenic Byway. Accessible only by a four-wheel-drive vehicle, this rugged country is the ideal growing ground for an abundance of wildflowers. The route follows 65 miles of unimproved road with many hiking spots along the way, allowing drivers the chance to get out and take a closer look. The Byway has a narrow window (June-September) in which it’s free of snow, so you’re good to go! Wildflowers like tufted hairgrass, alpine timothy, bog sedge, and bluebells can be found among the landscape of treeless tundra and mountains.

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CATHY FROMME PRAIRIE NATURAL AREA Fort Collins This naturalist haven is a rare example of presettlement in an authentic display of what the first European settlers of the land saw – a perfect, unadulterated Colorado prairie. Not only will visitors encounter the untouched splendor of wildflowers, they may also spot horned lizards, ground-nesting songbirds, or bald eagles and hawks on the hunt for prey. An easily walked 2.4-mile trip through the prairie, the paved Fossil Creek Trail is ideal for meandering along while taking in flowers like Nuttall’s violet, upright prairie coneflowers, beardtongues, and milkweeds.

DEVIL’S CAUSEWAY Steamboat Springs Devil’s Causeway, one of Colorado’s most notorious and harrowing hikes, is also one of the most beautiful with wildflowers bursting with color throughout the summer months. Lupines, Indian paintbrush, mule’s ears, and columbines surround picturesque high alpine lakes and line the trail that takes hikers up the iconic Chinese Wall. In the remote Flat Tops Wilderness area, accessible from the town of Yampa, the Devil’s Causeway hike begins at the Stillwater Reservoir Trailhead and ends with the daring cross of a rocky land bridge — a 3-foot wide, 300-foot long stretch of trail that drops off 1000 ft. on either side.

CUB LAKE/THE POOL LOOP, ROCKY MOUNTAIN NATIONAL PARK Estes Park The odds of witnessing wildflowers in full bloom are in your favor for a memorable trip when you choose Rocky Mountain National Park. Often overlooked, the 6.2-mile Cub Lake/Pool Loop has a tremendous variety of flora for visitors to enjoy. In fact, upward of 80 wildflower varieties can be found when hiking the terrain. Rocky Mountain hikers will also experience the beauty of Cub Lake. Ringed by a thick pine forest and marshy shoreline, the lake is covered in lily pads and is an inviting spot for ducks to take a dip.

GOOSE CREEK AND MOLLY GULCH Deckers A popular trail providing access into the southeast portion of the Lost Creek Wilderness Area, Goose Creek Trail is 9.6 miles of camping, fishing, rock formations, and (of course) vivacious wildflowers.

Yet, this is an outdoor oasis that is still healing from the 2012 Hayman Fire, which left a lasting imprint. Today, the lush green hiking trails that were luckily untouched stand in contrast to the land that was burnt. Visitors will be in awe to find that nature has a unique way of providing beauty in the face of natural devastation, as a multitude of

| JUNE 18, 2014 | BRAND NEW @ OUTFRONTONLINE.COM

HESSIE TRAILHEAD AT NEDERLAND Nederland Easily accessed from the Denver metro area, the Hessie Trailhead near Eldora Mountain Resort is an ideal three-mile route for visitors to see a bounty of wildflowers. Abandoned cabins are reminders of the area’s mining history, while glimpses of Eldora’s ski runs, a waterfall, beaver colony, and diverse range of the colorful wildflowers create a visual masterpiece for hikers.

wildflowers like yarrow, bellflower, and fireweed now grace much of the charred area. A two-day camping trip is perfect for taking in the scenery of the area, and the trails near Goose Creek offer primitive tent-camping sites that the whole family will enjoy.

GUNNISON NATIONAL FOREST Crested Butte Designated the “Wildflower Capital of Colorado,” Crested Butte offers visitors an exquisite trek with more than 1.2 million acres of wildflower hiking through the Gunnison National Forest. A southwestern Colorado town highly regarded for the rainbow of hues that take over mountainsides and meadows each summer, Crested Butte is the perfect destination for wildflowers throughout.

The most notable event in the area is the Crested Butte Wildflower Festival (July 7-13) with more than 200 events showcasing lush landscapes activities that include wildflower tours, garden excursions, and workshops. The Wildflower Festival is also offering an extensive schedule of 4 x 4 tours of Paradise Divide, Saturday Wildflower Walks, Friday Adventure Hikes, and Wildflower Tours of Crested Butte Mountain Resort from June 20 – August 15.

For more information, visit Colorado.com.

LORY STATE PARK Fort Collins One of the northern Front Range’s most beloved areas, Lory State Park has a bevy of outdoor activities and spectacular displays of wildflowers. The 26 miles of hiking and biking trails meander through rocky hills and green valleys, scenic gulches and ponderosa pine forests, allowing visitors to capture the magic of the outdoors. During the summer months, the park is a mecca for wildflowers with lively hues of colors from the canary-yellow blossom atop a prickly pear cactus and fiery orange blanket flower to the pale-pink gayfeather and Caribbean-sea-blue larkspur. Throughout the warmer months the Lory State Park rangers offer full- and almost full-moon hikes for a different take on the outdoor paradise.

RABBIT VALLEY RECREATION Grand Junction Near the Colorado River, you’ll find the 24-mile, high-mountain desert terrain of Rabbit Valley Recreation Area. Found growing among windsculpted sandstone, the splendid wildflowers add a welcome burst of color to this already beautiful landscape. From horseback rides through the area with a view of the sweeping panoramas while atop your mount, to hiking in the area’s many miles of trails, there is a multitude of ways to embrace the area’s wildflowers. After a long day of taking in the scenery of wildflowers, relax at one of the area’s three designated campsites.

SHRINE MOUNTAIN TRAIL Vail One of the most spectacular places to dive into Colorado wildflowers is Shrine Pass. In summer, the Shrine Mountain Trail dips into meadow after meadow carpeted with yellow daisies, coral-colored Indian paintbrush, spikes of purple lupine, and fuchsia fireweed, all spread out to create a picturesque vision of nature. From the trail’s ridge, hikers are rewarded with a 360-degree view of Mount of the Holy Cross in the Sawatch Range, part of the Gore Range, Uneva Peak, Copper Mountain, and the Flat Top Mountains guaranteeing vast beauty to those who choose to hike this trail.

WILLOW CREEK TRAIL, ROXBOROUGH STATE PARK Denver Red rocks and wildflowers dominate the landscape of this state park that encapsulates the natural transition of the plains’ rise into the dramatic heights of the Rocky Mountains. The varied environment allows for certain types of wildflowers, usually found miles apart, to be seen growing close to each other. As a day-use park, it’s ideal for getting away from city distractions and reconnecting with the beauty of Colorado wildflowers like American vetch, orchid penstemon, cinquefoil, and birdfoot violet.

VEGA STATE PARK Collbran At an elevation of 8000 feet, Vega State Park is a peaceful gem nestled on the edge of Grand Mesa National Forest, where lush montane meadows and aspen forests blanket the hillsides. Vega flourishes with vivid wildflowers in the spring giving hikers bursts of purple, blue, orange, yellow, and red wildflowers as they trek along the popular trails. Visitors may even encounter wildlife as they join communities of marmots, deer, elk, foxes, and migratory birds that roam the park. 

BRAND NEW @ OUTFRONTONLINE.COM

| JUNE 18, 2014 | 21

As a bisexual, plus-size woman of color, who better to represent us than Frenchie? She is a beacon.

FRENCHIE DAVIS: THE COMEBACK

QUEEN Noah L. Jordan

I

t’s a particularly dreary Monday afternoon when Frenchie Davis rings my phone. We happen to be in different cities, but despite the nagging weather on my end and the horrible reception on hers, she’s nothing but positive energy. That constant push for positivity is a Frenchie trademark, and most likely one of her greatest keys to success.

Growing up in Los Angeles, the 35-year-old songstress always loved music and singing. “I’ve been singing my whole life.

It’s just something I’ve always done,” she recalls matter of factly. “I don’t remember a time where I wasn’t singing or in love with music.” But it wasn’t until the seventh grade that she really tapped into her ability. She spent years entertaining throngs of people, but it was her comeback of a lifetime on NBC’s “The Voice” that really pulled her away from the pack. People always knew she had star potential and her time on the show only solidified their speculation.

Soon after, Frenchie became a household name known for her vocal prowess, but in that time she also became a businesswoman, and her vocal talents only accounted for a small fraction of her 22

grand plan. “The music industry has changed so much. It’s no longer built on artists getting multi-million dollar record deals,” she says. “It’s really about learning how to be an entrepreneur and creating your own machine.” And Frenchie is building quite the machine.

After leaving the world of reality television, she used her exposure to become a voice and an advocate against bullying for not only the LGBT community, plus-size women, and people of color but anyone who has ever felt excluded or bullied. “Since the beginning of time, there have always been bullies.

Luckily the LGBT community has been able to organize in a way that has allowed bullying to be at the forefront of discussion,” she says. “But it goes beyond just being LGBT and I think it’s important that when we talk about the issue of bullying, we do it in a way that is all-inclusive.” As a bisexual, plus-size woman of color, who better to represent us than Frenchie? She is a beacon.

But the machine doesn’t stop there. Currently, Frenchie is also working on developing Phat Girl Fitness, an all-inclusive, body-positive, intimidation-free health and wellness community for women of all shapes, sizes, and fitness levels. “The reality is — and this stems for my stance against

| JUNE 18, 2014 | BRAND NEW @ OUTFRONTONLINE.COM

fat-shaming and bullying — some of us will never be a size two but that doesn’t negate the idea that we should live healthy and active lifestyles,” she says. For Frenchie, skinny and healthy aren’t synonymous; fitness should be for everyone. “All my fellow big girls out there who love their bodies — loving your body means taking care of it, too,” she says. “I’m really proud of this.”

Frenchie may be busy building her empire, but as a natural-born performer she will always circle back to her love of music. During PrideFest, she will be lighting up the stage for the gaggles of gays when she performs on Center Stage Sunday afternoon.

“It’s one of the few Prides in the country that I have not performed for and my current publicist is a Denver native, so it just seems like the right thing to do,” she says. “I love performing for my gays and Denver is such a beautiful city.”

Even though she was never allowed to compete for the title of “American Idol,” that’s exactly what Frenchie Davis has become. And with a new single debuting in the fall, a talk show idea being passed around, a nonprofit in the works, and a following that easily tops previous winners of the Idol franchise, an American Idol is exactly what she will continue to be, as long as she holds steady on her burgeoning path of success. 

Don’t miss PrideFest headliner Frenchie Davis, performing at 3pm Sunday on the PrideFest main stage. Learn more about Frenchie on her website, officialfrenchiedavis.com or on Twitter, @frenchiedavis.

BRAND NEW @ OUTFRONTONLINE.COM

| JUNE 18, 2014 | 23

PRIDEFEST HEADLINER HOTTIES

DAVID HERNANDEZ

KALIL VALENTINO Age: 30 | Height: 5’11 | Lives in: Los Angeles Birthplace: St. Louis, MO | Astrological Sign: Leo Single or Taken: Legally married Your Best Feature: My lips Biggest Goal in Life: My marriage Sexiest trait in a mate: Dark features (mmm..)

Guilty Pleasure: Peach cobbler Drink of Choice: Malibu and pineapple Describe your perfect first date: Dinner, movies, and conversation Best pick-up line (either used or heard): “We’ve met before, I know it!”

Tell us a secret about yourself: I work out in only my underwear.

Pets: Havanese & Poodle Mixed Dog Celebrity Doppelgänger: Jason Derulo Three of your favorite spots in Denver: Charlie’s, Tracks, and the Compound Boxers, briefs, or something else: BOXER BRIEFS Best place to meet single people: Grindr Biggest turn-on: Sexy smiles and legs.

MATTHEW RUSH Age: early 40s | Height: Excuse me, but that’s just insensitive. I prefer to refer to myself as vertically inclined.

Lives in: an Altered State Birthplace: Pennsylvania Astrological Sign: Virgo Single or Taken: He went to Jared.

Your Best Feature: “Another Gay Movie.” Wait “Pro Wrestlers vs. Zombies.” Wait. My arms.

Biggest Goal in Life: To have my own action figure.

Sexiest trait in a mate: Is a sense of humor a trait?

Guilty Pleasure: I may or may not have Selena Gomez in my playlists.

Drink of Choice: it’s a mixture of vodka, Michelob Ultra, and pink lemonade concentrate.

Perfect first date: September 22, 1970 something when the doctor slapped me on the ass.

Best pickup line: “Lift with your knees and not your back.”

Tell us a secret about yourself: I like to pride myself on knowing whether it’s Ice Ice Baby or Under Pressure by the first bum bum bum badda dum bum.

Pets: A pug named Egg Roll and a beta fish named Tuna.

Celebrity Doppelgänger: When I pull my hat down low, I get John Cena a lot.

Three of your favorite spots in Denver: Anyplace where DeMarcio Slaughter is.

Best place to meet single people: Christian Mingle, I guess? I mean you know they’re going to be single because normal people aren’t going to talk to them.

Biggest turn-on: I never chase a man but if he has tattoos and muscles, but I might just power walk!

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| JUNE 18, 2014 | BRAND NEW @ OUTFRONTONLINE.COM

KALIL VALENTINO: WILLIAM DICK FOR WDPHOTOINC | MATTHEW RUSH: VINCENT MARCO

Age: 25 | Height: 5’8” | Lives in: Los Angeles, CA Birthplace: Phoenix, AZ | Astrological Sign: Gemini Single or Taken: Single and ready to mingle.

Your Best Feature: Depends on what you like.

Biggest Goal in Life: To make an album that is authentic and true to myself that the masses can relate to, but more importantly, is something I am proud of.

Sexiest trait in a mate: Confidence Guilty Pleasures: Pinot Grigio & Sex Drink of Choice: Pinot Grigio Perfect first date: Dinner and a good talk, no expectations, and possibly cuddling later.

Best pick-up line (either used or heard): No pick up lines are good. Ever.

Tell us a secret about yourself: When I find a good pair of pants, I wear them all the time. Seriously, all the time. I also like to buy designer underwear. It is kind of a financial problem.

Pets: Chihuahua. His name is Little. He is very small.

Celebrity Doppelgänger: I honestly don’t have one. I have looked into this and cannot find anyone who looks like me.

Three of your favorite spots in Denver: I love all of Denver. I like the nightlife. I am a night owl.

Boxers, briefs, or something else: Briefs, but I have a lot of boxers that I wear when I am at home. So comfortable.

Best place to meet single people: There isn’t really a place. Usually meeting awesome people happens at a grocery store or somewhere random. Definitely not a bar.

Biggest turn-on: A person who is driven and has a passion, confident, and appreciates how hard I have worked in this industry.

Union Station

The City Is Alive.

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| JUNE 18, 2014 | 25

DENVER HOTTIES: BARTENDER EDITION

Eye candy abounds in Denver, and these five gorgeous bartenders are testament. While we could’ve filled this entire issue with sexy drink-slingers, we’re not one for total nightlife spoiler alerts.

Consider this an appetizer before you dive into our dives this Pride and feast your eyes on the glory of LGBT Denver.

PHOTOS BY HANS ROSEMOND 26

Name: Traci Nicole-Star Wallace Age: 27 Height: 5’2 Works at: Blush and Blu Lives in: Capitol Hill Birthplace: Denver Astrological Sign: Leo Single or Taken: Aren’t all bartenders supposed to stay single?

Your Best Feature: Sense of humor.

Or my eyes. Or my ass.

Biggest Goal in Life: To smile everyday.

| JUNE 18, 2014 | BRAND NEW @ OUTFRONTONLINE.COM

Sexiest trait in a mate: Intelligence Guilty Pleasures: 90s boy bands Drink of Choice: Whiskey Perfect first date: Lots of laughter, intelligent conversation, beautiful meal with local, fresh food paired with a local micro-brew, maybe a little kinkier towards the end ;-> Best pickup line: “Some people think of their body as a temple, I think of mine as an amusement park that you can ride all night.”

Tell us a secret about yourself: I

am a huge nerd hidden behind a lot of tattoos.

Pets: Two dogs, two cats.

Celebrity Doppelgänger: I don’t think I look like anyone, but I get Tara, from “True Blood” a lot.

Three of your favorite spots in Denver: Mercury Cafe, Tooey’s, and Blush, of course!

Boxers, briefs, or something else: I like boyshorts.

Biggest turn-on: A well-engorged … vocabulary.

Name: Tyler Cameron Csencsits Age: 23 Height: 6’ Works at: Tracks Lives in: Uptown Birthplace: Northampton, Pennsylvania.

Astrological Sign: Libra Single or Taken: Taken Your Best Feature: Biceps/arms.

Biggest Goal in Life: I’d like to attend graduate school in the near future in hopes of attaining some semi-lucrative, LGBT-oriented career.

Sexiest trait in a mate: Reason, logic, rationality … all tied with a great ass, of course.

Guilty Pleasures: Goldfish snack crackers, eating in my bed, eating in the bath, more Goldfish, the American version of “Queer as Folk” (the acting is an absolute tragedy and the plot is about as intricate as one might find in a coloring book, BUT the one blonde twink kept me watching all the seasons), holding my big stuffed trout pillow at night, and Ferrero Rocher.

Drink of Choice: Jameson and Diet.

Perfect first date: He shows up wearing nothing that emanates formality or status (no dress shirts — especially from Express — no slacks, no bedazzled jeans), let’s say a tight pair of worn-down jeans and a dumpy looking, plain, crew neck sweatshirt. We go to dinner, maybe at City O’City or Steuben’s, where we discuss the arbitrary nature of reality, which cocktails we would like to try, and how no one looks like their Grindr pictures these days … but we’re glad that we did because otherwise this dinner would be really weird. He lets me pick up the check, but not out of chivalry, but because we both have a bad taste in our mouths about ‘traditional values’ and stale ‘cultural narratives’ — he went to college. We make our way to Beauty Bar where we drink and dance awfully to 80s and slightly esoteric indie/alt hits. At 12:45pm, LCD Soundsystem’s “Dance Yourself Clean” comes on, and after the sixteenth Jameson shot combined with

hesitant attempts to make out, we surely need to do so. We sing all the words. The dancing is messy. We head home, sleep together. He’s still there in the afternoon, when I wake up.

Best pick-up line (either used or heard): “Looking?”

Tell us a secret about yourself: My mom did my laundry til I was 17.

Pets: A cat named Alice ‘the Norby’ Ke$ha Keeney Csencsits.

Celebrity Doppelgänger: I get Tom Cruise a lot by old women.

Three of your favorite spots in Denver: Beauty Bar, Tracks, Cheeseman.

Best place to meet single people: Dumb Friends League shopping for cats.

Biggest turn-on: He’s turned on by me.

Name: Jelvis Stinnett Age: 35 Height: 5’10 Works at: Tracks Lives in: Belmar Birthplace: Arkansas Astrological Sign: Capricorn/Aquarius Single or Taken: Married Best Feature: Hair Biggest Goal in Life: To be happy.

Sexiest Trait in a Mate: My wife Guilty Pleasure: Vacations Drink of Choice: Flavored rums Perfect first date: It’s been a long time since my first date.

Best pickup line: “I wonder what you taste like.”

Tell us a secret about yourself: I don’t wear underwear.

Pets: Three Yorkies Celebrity Doppelganger: Charlie Sheen Three of your favorite spots in Denver: Lake, Tracks, the movies Best place to meet single people: Don’t know. I’m married.

Biggest turn-on: The line under the breasts.

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Name: Daniel J Romero, AKA Panda Age: 35 Height: 5’7 Works at: The best bar in Denver: the Denver Wrangler Lives in: Park Hill Birthplace: Denver, CO Astrological Sign: Aries Single or Taken: Taken Your Best Feature: My panda belly.

Biggest Goal in Life: To visit China and hold a baby panda.

Sexiest trait in a mate: A great smile Guilty Pleasures: Chick-Fil-A. (I’M SORRY!) Drink of Choice: Vodka tonics Perfect first date: Maybe coffee, lots of talking, maybe dinner.

Best pickup line: Something about pandas.

Tell us a secret about yourself: Penguins are my second favorite animal.

Pets: Bodacious Aurelius, the super-kitty extraordinaire.

Celebrity Doppelgänger: Guillermo Diaz, from Scandal.

Three of your favorite spots in Denver: Mile High Stadium, The Denver Wrangler, and Pete’s Kitchen!

Best place to meet single people: The Denver Wrangler, of course!

Biggest turn-on: Someone who is goofy and fun.

What Denver bartender sets your heart aflame?

“Like” our facebook page and join the conversation. e facebook.com/OutFrontColorado 28

| JUNE 18, 2014 | BRAND NEW @ OUTFRONTONLINE.COM

Name: Silas Pettus Age: 32 Height: 6’3 Works at: X Bar Lives in: Hilltop Birthplace: Benton Arkansas Astrological sign: Pisces Single or Taken: I am very much taken by a beautiful, confident, supportive, loving man.

Best Feature: My uncanny ability to engage with almost every personality I come into contact with.

Biggest Goal in Life: To travel to all the places that fascinate me.

Sexiest trait in a mate: I think the sexiest trait in a mate is confidence.

Pretty eyes and teeth are important as well.

Guilty Pleasure: My guiltiest of all guilty pleasures is Reese’s Peanut Butter cups (the big cups).

Drink of choice: My drink of choice is definitely a Venti iced green tea Perfect first date: Hmm the perfect first date. If two people can meet for a bite to eat and stay engaged in what each other is saying, that’s perfect enough for me.

Best pickup line: I don’t think I have ever heard a good pick up line.

Tell us a secret about yourself: Secrets can eat a person alive. I try not to have them.

Pets: I have two dogs: Sugar and Poncho Celebrity Doppelganger: Most people think I look like Jim Carrey.

Three of your favorite spots in Denver: Steuben’s, Lannie’s Clocktower, and any of the beautiful parks.

Best place to meet single people: X Bar is a damn good place to meet single people.

Biggest turn on: A man that exudes confidence and comfort in in his skin. That is so hot.

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| JUNE 18, 2014 | 29

CA LEN DAR

FRI

JUN

7 T H A N N UA L

20 CO R KY ' S

PRIDE P O O L PA RT Y

FABULOUS EVENTS FOR LGBT COLORADO & BEYOND

FRI

FRI

JUN

JUN

20

LOST WORLDS:

THE WOMEN’S PARTY

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TO B E N E F I T T H E CO R KY C A R ES F O U N DAT I O N

@ WARWICK HOTEL DENVER, 1776 GRANT ST VIP ENTRY 5:30PM; GENERAL ADMISSION 6PM The only truly open bar party in Denver PRIDE weekend.

Entertainment, Swimming, Dancers, Jello shots, and so much more!

Purchase tickets at ofcnow.co/corky

DJ S H A N E S T I E L

@ DENVER WRANGLER, 1700 LOGAN ST. • 10PM Colorado native DJ Shane Stiel brings his high-energy beats to the Wrangler's Pride Party.

Featuring DJs Trina J, Stone Cox, and Blaque Girl, this party promises to be the largest Pride party for women in Denver!

More info at ofcnow.co/wrangler

More info at ofcnow.co/tracks

FRI

FRI

JUN

JUN

20

@ TRACKS, 3500 WALNUT ST. • 7PM

D R AG N AT I O N

ADORE DELANO CO U RT N E Y AC T B E N D E L AC R E M E N I N A F L OW E RS

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@ TRACKS, 3500 WALNUT • DOORS 9PM Host Nina Flowers and special guest Aurora Sexton are joined by RuPaul’s Drag Race Season 6 favorites Adore Delano, Courtney Act, & BenDeLaCreme.

More info at ofcnow.co/tracks

GAY E R P R I D E

FRI

C R OSSWA L K WA L K- O F F

JUN

20 B EA R RACU DA @ CITY HALL, 1144 BROADWAY • 9PM Bearracuda is the largest-attended bear dance party in the U.S. Hosted by Johnny Scruff, nearly 1000 men will party to the beats of DJ HiFi Sean from London.

@ BUFFALO EXCHANGE, 51 BROADWAY • 7PM Queens, kings, & fabulous people walk off against each other for the chance to win hundreds of dollars in prizes. Email gayerpride@gmail.com to sign up. Afterparty at The Compound, 10pm.

More info at ofcnow.co/buffalo

VISIT THE NEW OUTFRONTONLINE.COM

• MORE CALENDAR EVENTS • EXCLUSIVE CONTENT

More info at bearracuda.com 30

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21 & 22

D E N V E R P R I D E F EST 2 0 14

PHOTO: CHARLES BROSHOUS

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FEATURING HEADLINERS DAVID HERNANDEZ, FRENCHIE DAVIS, AND BENDELACREME SATURDAY, JUNE 21, 11AM - 7PM SUNDAY, JUNE 22, 10AM - 6PM  COORS LIGHT PRIDEFEST PARADE: 9:30AM

325,000 attendees. More than 250 vendor booths. Three stages of entertainment. Denver PrideFest is now the third largest Pride festival and the seventh largest Pride parade in the United States. Come out and experience a fun, safe, and empowering space to celebrate and promote the heritage and culture of the LGBT and allied community in Colorado.

Visit glbtcolorado.org/pridefest for the full events schedule, to purchase VIP tickets, and more!

SAT

PHOTO: LAURA BACCUS

DENVER DY K E MARCH

JUN

9 T H A N N UA L

@ JAKE’S FOOD & SPIRITS, 3800 WALNUT STREET, DENVER 8PM

@ EXDO, 3545 LARIMER STREET • DOORS 7PM

@ BLUSH & BLU, 1526 E. COLFAX AVENUE

JUN

All are welcome at the 6th Annual Denver Dyke March! Pre-party begins at 10am, followed by entertainment and rally at 2pm, and the march to Civic Center Park, beginning at 4pm.

Join hosts Dr. Christopher Ott and Mr. Jeremy Simons in this annual fundraiser for One Colorado.

Presale tickets & info at ofcnow.co/pink

More info at ofcnow.co/dykemarch

4 T H A N N UA L

PINK 22 F L A M I N G O PRIDE PA R T Y JUN

@ X BAR, 629 E. COLFAX AVENUE • 7AM

PA R K I N G LOT

POOL PA R T Y

SUN

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JUN

JUN

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@ CHARLIE’S, 900 E. COLFAX

More info at xbardenver.com

More info at ofcnow.co/charlies

THE OFFICIAL P R I D E F EST A F T E R PA RT Y

CLIMAX SU N DAY

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22 PRIDE A F T E R PA R T Y

Start your Pride Sunday off right at X Bar, opening at 7am with $3 mimosas, $5 bloody marys, and DJ Gary on the decks at 10am.

JUN

This amazing Saturday night comedy showcase features Chuck Roy, Jordan Weileba, Brady Quarterman, and Kendra Thompson. And as a bonus, Mona Lott will be auctioning eligible bachelors. Proceeds benefit the Colorado Rush, a gay-affirming rugby club.

More info at ofcnow.co/lol

Watch the parade from Charlie’s grandstand! $5 Sunday brunch, $5 Bud Light Beer Bust 4 - 8pm, $1 Bud Light drafts from 8pm - close, and $3 Stoli all day.

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PHOTO: CRYSTAL ALLEN

JUN

@ BOYZTOWN 117 BROADWAY, DENVER 10PM Denver’s hottest male revue!

Pride drink specials!

More info at ofcnow.co/boyztown

P R I D E DAY @ E L I TC H GA R D E N S

@ VINYL, 1082 BROADWAY DOORS OPEN AT 6PM Special guest DJs Dani Toro and Twisted Dee join Cindel, JJ Drums, Flowers, and Tatiana for this rooftop extravaganza! 4 dance floors, sexy dancers, Djs, Grilled Food, Drink Specials, Hookahs...and non stop fun.

DJ T W I ST E D D E E

More info at ofcnow.co/afterpride

Enter promo code PRIDE at elitchgardens.com for specially-priced tickets. A portion of the proceeds benefits The Center. Discount is not available at the front gate.

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CLASSIC COUNTRY @ CHARLIE’S

The 3rd Annual Classic Country Show was held at Charlie’s on May 31. A capacity crowd watched as some of the best entertainment in Denver belted out old country favorites and enjoyed the accompanying beer bust. The event, which was hosted by Miss IGRA 2014 2nd Runner-up Katrina St. Andrews, was a benefit for the International Gay Rodeo Association and its charities. | Photos by Charles Broshous

See more photos online at ofcnow.co/classiccountry

See more photos at outfrontonline.com 32

| JUNE 18, 2014 | BRAND NEW @ OUTFRONTONLINE.COM

LEGAL

Psychological Parent Standing for Allocation of Parental Responsibilities From The Law Offices of Frazer & Parks, LLC Factual Scenario: Jill was in a relationship with her same-sex partner, Barbara, and they raised Barbara’s daughter, Emily, together as a family in Colorado. Jill and Barbara never entered into a Colorado civil union, and they were never legally married in another state. Emily’s father was not in the picture. During their relationship, Emily referred to both Jill and Barbara as “mom.” Recently, Jill and Barbara ended their relationship. Now, Barbara is refusing to let Jill spend time with Emily. Barbara told Jill she has no legal parental rights. Is there anything that Jill can do?

If you find yourself in a similar situation as Jill, you may be able to successfully make a psychological parent argument before a Colorado family court. A non-legal parent “may be deemed a psychological

parent for the purposes of seeking and receiving an award of parental responsibilities. . . .” In re E.L.M.C., 100 P.3d 546, 559 (Colo. App. 2004). In general, a psychological parent who had the physical care for a child for 182 days or more may file a petition with the court for allocation of parental responsibilities. Colo. Rev. Stat. § 14-10-123(1)(c)(2013). Further, the petition for allocation of parenting time must be filed within 182 days after the termination of physical care.

When assessing physical care, Colorado courts consider “the nature, frequency, and duration of contacts between the child and the nonparent, including the amount of time the child has spent in the actual, physical possession of the nonparent and the [legal] parent.” In re L.F., 121 P. 3d 267, 270-271 (2005).

See the full story at ofcnow.co/parent

The opinions expressed in this article are general in nature. For specific legal advice about your particular situation, please contact an attorney.

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| JUNE 18, 2014 | 33

CUISINE

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n vino veritas, they say. But that’s before the fourth-glass-of-wine shenanigans and, after an intellectual debate on the political implications of nuclear proliferation in third-world, sub-Saharan Africa. As we all know, only the high-browed, over-achieving, high-earning, astutely-cultural pundits of the world truly know how to drink wine.

Poppycock.

If there’s anything my tenure in the culinary world has taught me, it is that most prescriptions for drinking wine are bunk. You enjoy what you enjoy, and that’s the starting point.

But suppose you’re interested in refining your palate — not to meet the membership requirements of salons on global politics, but to know what to pair with that oven-baked salmon on a Wednesday night. Well, let’s start with the basics.

WHITE WINES These are generally more à la mode amid the hoi polloi of the drinking world — Chardonnays, Sauvignon Blancs, and Pinot Grigios at their core.

In general, consider Chardonnays the red meat of the white wine world … heftier, and often strongly oaked. Once upon a time, American vintners went to town on these grapes, oaking them until you couldn’t taste anything but the barrels they languished in. They boast a bit more nuance now, but Chardonnays are still the most oaked white out there.

Then we have Sauvignon Blanc — the white fish of the white wine world. Naturally, it pairs well with a great deal of seafood, but also is a keen couple for chicken dishes and lighter fare. There’s a lot of minerality and citrus in these bottles typically, which means that they stand up best to lighter proteins donned with creamier sauces.

Last of the three amigos is Pinot Grigio — the vegetarian’s white. Wine Enthusiasts are wont to call this a “zippy” varietal, but in my experience, the citrus is down-played and the fruitier stone fruits come to the fore: peaches, nectarines, etc.

There’s even the playful presence of melon in many vintages, which makes it a mellow sipper as well as a gentle partner for simply prepared halibut or tilapia, garnished with nothing more than a few herbs. This is also a great pair for vegetarian dishes; personally, I enjoy it with roasted root vegetables.

There are other whites out there worth exploring, of course. I occasionally crack a bottle of an apple-y Chenin Blanc or a floral Viognier. But these are more seldom treats in the wine canon, and often are enjoyed only when expertly suggested by a sommelier. Oh, and lest I forget, save your sweet Gewürtztraminers and late-harvest wines for dessert. They’re much sweeter on the tongue — too overbearing for a savory entrée.

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RED WINES The intense and complicated world of red wine is often too much for neophytes to handle. Instead of learning about the characteristics of each grape, many just stumble across a bottle they enjoy and continue to drink that until it ceases to exist. I know — I’ve done it.

But let’s dabble in diversification, highlighting three more varietals that are central to the world’s red wine portfolio: Cabernet Sauvignon, Merlot, and Pinot Noir.

Ah, you Cab, you. Typically layered and rich with licorice-like accents, Cabernet Sauvignon is often more dense and fruity stateside than in Europe. Part of that is drinker preference; we Americans like our high-octane (14 or more percent alcohol), fruity wines. But in that mix you’ll find notes of berry jam, cassis — even some herbaceousness. It’s hard to give this one a set food pairing, but it often goes well with tomato sauce-based pasta dishes, heartier poultry, and red meat.

Merlot, on the other hand, is apt to be more fruit-forward than a Cab. It’s a decadent wine by U.S. accounts, and even has a greater depth in other countries. This is a great aging wine, but if you’re intent on drinking it right away, find a hearty steak begging for a match. Be sure to taste before you pair, however, to be sure that the spicing on the meat matches the fruity notes of the wine. Also keep in mind: there have been an impressive collection of Merlots coming out of Washington state recently, so watch your labels.

Last of the red triumvirate is Pinot Noir, easily the lightest of the three varietals on this list. For some, it comes across too light and fragile — almost like a white wine wanna-be. In truth, however, it’s delightful to have a red that suits brothy soups with aplomb, while also taking on risottos, roasts — even some Asian noodle dishes. To give you a fitting visual, it’s been dubbed “the iron fist in the velvet glove.” There’s a lot going on here, but the best are smooth as silk.

Other reds to keep your eye on: Syrah, a rich, vaguely spicy wine reminiscent of Port. It goes great with chocolate, I dare say. Malbec is also a delightful treat, though kicks with a bit of sourness every now and then depending on the bottle. Otherwise, it’s a close cousin to Merlot in my mind.

Well, there you have it — a blitzkreig tour of red and white wine for those aiming to dig deeper.

By all means, have another glass. Sample. Pour.

Repeat. And if you’re really intent on learning the flavor profiles, remember that a spit bucket is also de rigueur — especially if you’re exploring in a winery’s tasting room.

Cheers! 

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ARTS & CULTURE

MARQUEE

SECOND CITY'S AMERICAN MIXTAPE June 4 - 29 Champa & 13th • Denver DenverCenter.org

All Hail the Great American Mixtape SHREK THE MUSICAL May 7 - Sept, 16 5501 Arapahoe Ave. • Boulder BouldersDinnerTheatre.com

PLEASE JOIN US FOR OUR 2014-2015 SEASON How to Succeed in Business without Really Trying Anything Goes • The Clean House Next to Normal • The Marvelous Wonderettes Young Frankenstein 2450 W. Main St. • Littleton TownHallArtsCenter.com

Kailyn Lamb

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he small and intimate Garner Galleria Theatre has done it again with “Second City’s American Mixtape.” With a cast of four, “American Mixtape” is a collection of short skits where no topic is safe from their hilarious scrutiny.

Cast members Randall Harr, Nicole C. Hastings, Meghan Murphy, and Travis Turner each periodically come out in between skits to tell the audience their own histories with mixed tapes. Small town introductions to Led Zeppelin, crushes on boys, and using song titles to send a message are just some of the stories these tapes have to tell.

Although the skits vary in topic, the underlying theme is the power of music and the influence it has on our lives.

The play opens with a sermon, given by Turner.

But this sermon is special, it’s about telling fear “to go the f*ck away.” From there the laughs just keep coming, until audiences are clapping their hands and wiping tears from their eyes. It was a show so funny, I just didn’t want it to end.

The beauty of the Garner Galleria is that smaller shows such as this one thrive here. It allows the cast to go out into the audience and

bring the show directly to you. Let’s not forget about audience participation either. With her ukulele in hand, Hastings found a couple in the audience and, after asking them a few simple questions like how they met and some hobbies they had, the cast performed a rock opera of their love story.

Since this is a show about mix tapes, we can’t leave out the soundtrack. With an eclectic blend of Ke$ha, show tunes, Pink Floyd’s “Dark Side of the Moon,” Blondie, Chris Isaak, and much, much more, the show couldn’t have done any better in the music department. Several of the skits also include songs performed and written by the cast and crew of the show, like a song about super cuteness taking over the world.

The four cast members are the perfect cocktail of funny. The skits fit seamlessly together into a comedic masterpiece.

“Second City’s American Mixtape” will be running at the Garner Galleria Theatre until June 29. The show is 1 hour and 45 minutes long, including a 15-minute intermission.

For showtimes and to purchase tickets, visit DenverCenter.org.

N O W O P E N : C H I H U LY CINEMA Q FILM FESTIVAL July 24-27 Schedule out & tickets on sale June 23 2510 East Colfax www.denverfilm.org

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Ends November 30, 2014 @ Denver Botanic Gardens, 1007 York Street While the Botanic Gardens’ annual summer collaborations with artists always delight, this year, we are in for a fantastic treat: worldrenowned glass artist Dale Chihuly. This is truly one of the largest events of the year for the Rocky Mountain arts scene. Learn more at botanicgardens.org.

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| JUNE 18, 2014 | 37

Brian Henderson

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, D U O R P , L U F E PRID D E R A P PRE

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ho would have imagined 45 years ago that our divided and (yet united) states would be on the brink of seeing marriage equality become another law of our land? Most recently, 19 of 50 states allow for marriage equality with three others, including Colorado, including civil union or domestic partnership in their state legislation.

In the coming months, we will see how marriage equality moves forward in Utah, Oklahoma, Nevada, Texas, Virginia, Tennessee, Kentucky, Ohio, and Michigan.

With defiance, courage, and conviction, gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender, questioning, and allied individuals reacted on June 28, 1969, to the police raid on the Stonewall Inn in Greenwich Village. This outcry for justice prompted Craig Rodwell, Fred Sargeant, Ellen Broidy, and Linda Rhodes, to propose on November 2, 1969, the first gay pride parade to be held in New York City.

Forty-five years later we witness Gay Pride parades, festivals, and events the world over.

Famed artist, Vincent Van Gogh, is quoted as having said, “Making progress is like miners’ work: it doesn’t advance as quickly as one should like, and also as others expect, but faced with such a task, patience and faithfulness are essential.”

Today, as a community of lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgendered, and allied people may we remember that our work for equality and justice is not in vain. On account of the patience and faithfulness of others before us, our Pride Marches are more than just events. We can be proud of how far our culture and society have come. In healthy and hope-giving ways, we can be

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prideful knowing that each one of us is a beautiful human being endowed with the ability and goodness to make this world a more welcoming, affirming, and caring place. With proud spirits, and prideful acknowledgement of our humanity, we need always be prepared to take the next steps to seeing justice and equality become reality.

These steps will challenge each of us to listen more carefully and compassionately to one another. These steps will challenge us to take often the high road of character especially when words and actions of others dismiss and disrespect our human dignity. These steps will challenge us to carry the movement for equality for everyone from courtrooms and sanctuaries to our homes and neighborhoods.

Taking some liberty with a famed quote oft used by Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., I remind us in this 45th year since the Stonewall outcry for justice, “We ain’t what we oughta be; we ain’t what we wanna be; we ain’t what we’re gonna be; but thank God we ain’t [where we was]!”

So … be proud, be prideful, be prepared as our Denver PrideFest is experienced once more.

Know that you too have a part in making our city be a more welcoming and affirming place … for everyone.  Brian Henderson has been an ordained minister with American Baptist Churches, USA, for 14 years. Holding multiple degrees in theology and systems theory, Brian is the first openly gay clergy person for the First Baptist Church of Denver, located at 14th and Grant St., where Sunday services are held each week at 10:30am.

Learn more at fbcdenver.org.

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| JUNE 18, 2014 | 39

The Skinny on Short Shorts Lauren Archuletta

SUN’S OUT, GUNS OUT. SKY’S OUT … THIGHS OUT?

Chubbies Shorts.

Learn more at chubbiesshorts.com.

PROUD

With temperatures rising, it appears that so are the hemlines on shorts. While Daisy Dukes may be nothing new, we are just getting acquainted with “Chubbies,” and I am not talking about what lies beneath.

If you’ve walked around Cap Hill lately, you’re sure to have seen men donning this new type of super short shorts; Chubbies is a brand that sells men’s shorts with only a specific five-and-a-half inch inseam.

These shorts may have been popular in some of our favorite 80s movies, but the past few decades have been dedicated to cargos, surfer shorts, and even denim JNCO jeans that men let hang down their waist. So why the sudden blast from the past?

My best friend Jose is absolutely thrilled that short shorts are “making a comeback” in modernday society. As soon as the temperatures rose above 60 degrees, he slipped on a pair of Sperry’s and his favorite red, white, and blue Chubbies to celebrate the soon-to-be summer weather. (As a matter of fact, I ordered Jose a pair of “Mile Thighs” Chubbies — short shorts with the Colorado flag on them — for his birthday more than a month ago. The fact that they have yet to ship from the Chubbies factory in San Francisco speaks to the overwhelming growing popularity of the short shorts.)

When I asked Jose’s opinion on the evolution of short shorts — from the Adidas soccer

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shorts of the 70s to the cargo shorts Jason Biggs sported in American Pie to now — he spoke a lot about the shift in masculinity as associated with men’s shorts.

“In the early 70s, it was not uncommon to see a man wearing short shorts,” Jose said. “At some point there was a shift where men wanted to appear more masculine and short shorts just did not fit into that. This newer generation of men, my generation, both gay and straight men, are more secure in their masculinity and are okay with exposing a little more skin.”

A recent Wall Street Journal article about men wearing short shorts also spoke of men being more comfortable with their bodies and their masculinity.

In the article, Chubbies chief designer and founder Rainer Castillo said the reason for creating Chubbies was because he felt that they “spend too much time in the gym to hide under frumpy shorts.”

The goal of Chubbies, according to Castillo, is to literally “bridge the gap between long cargo shorts and fussy, high-end designer short shorts.”

“I think there’s been a resurgence in men wanting to stay up to date on what’s hot for summer,” Jose added. “It just so happens that short shorts are making a comeback and I don’t see it slowing down anytime soon.”

So there you have it, ladies and gents, short shorts might be here to stay. Until the next big fashion trend — or at least until the temperatures drop — we will all be getting up close and personal with some man thighs. 

S KI N C I T Y

How to protect yourself during PrideFest & all summer long Kelsey Lindsey

A

h Pride. The sun is shining, shirts are off, and assless chaps are finally (semi) acceptable in public. With all this frivolity and nudeness, a common enemy lurks just outside the shadows, threatening both twinks and bears alike. No, it’s not Rick Perry, or even Focus on the Family. It’s a burn — sun damage that can quickly cripple even the strongest of mountain men and quickly turn your Pride memories as sour as a rejected RuPaul diva.

What makes us Denver PrideFesters even more susceptible to the sun’s harmful rays is the high altitude. The thin air density found above sea level means that there is 25 percent less protection from UV rays. So you freckly, pasty bunch (and I can only say that because I fall into your ranks) need to load up on the good stuff, and often.

Even if you’re blessed with Beyoncé’s skin, generating a caramel (rather than cherry) hue when exposed to the sun, you still run the risk of skin disease and wrinkles if overexposed.

Thankfully, there are multiple measures to take to avoid the embarrassment and pain of a tomato ass (just another reason to rethink those chaps). The first, and obvious must is a sunscreen with a relatively high SPF. The American Academy of Dermatology

recommends a sunscreen with at least SPF 30, applied regularly throughout the day. And while bigger might seem better in terms of the SPF number, many experts are saying this isn’t so. Any sunscreens over SPF 50 are usually tooting that number just for looks — they don’t offer any more protection than those with SPF 50.

Choose a “broad spectrum” sunscreen that protects against both UVB and UVA radiation, and if you’re going to be participating in any wet t-shirt contests, make it waterproof.

Here are some of my recommendations: Clarins’ UV Plus Day Screen High Protection Tint SPF 40 ($43, Nordstrom) comes in a range of tints, smoothing over minor blemishes on the face while offering protection from sun damage. Handy for the city, the formula also contains a patented anti-pollution complex.

In a recent study by Consumer Reports, Bullfrog’s Water Armor Sport Quick Gel ($11.99, Walgreens) was one of only two tested waterproof brands that upheld its SPF protection after swimming.

An oldie but goodie, NO-AD ($8.99, Walmart) repeatedly performs as well (or even better) than higher-priced sunscreens in consumer tests. Its cheap price point means it won’t be too much of a bummer if you lose the bottle during your riotous Pride festivities. 

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Explore Your Options Face Skincare Botox/Fillers Laser Eyelids Surgical Lifts

Breast

LoHi Delays Aging with Laser Focus

Kailyn Lamb

W

hen summertime rolls around, so do the beach-body workouts, fad diets, and all the other “get thin fast” tricks in the book. But like New Year’s Resolutions, how many of us have the discipline to stick with it?

“The way it’s been, especially in this country, is a roller coaster. Some fad diet comes out, and yeah, you might lose 30 pounds in two months, but the second you get off of it you gain all that weight back. That’s not sustainable — it’s ruining your metabolism,” says Nick Tvrdik, a doctor at LoHi Lipo Laser Clinic, a facility changing the face of weight loss procedures in Denver.

At LoHi Lipo Laser Clinic, cold lasers are used to break down the fat in your body so that your system can metabolize it the way it naturally does.

According to Tvrdik, cold lasers work differently on your body than hot lasers.

“It’s stimulating cells as opposed to damaging them,” he says.

Since cold laser procedures cause no damage to your cells, patients can go on with their daily lives as normal. The skin is not cut so patients don’t have to deal with stitches or the recovery time that typically comes with cosmetic surgeries.

But that’s not all LoHi Lipo Clinic does.

“We want to utilize the technology as a kickstart to living a healthier lifestyle,” Tvrdik says. The ultimate goal at LoHi is to get their patients on healthier diets and leading more active lifestyles supplementary to the laser procedures.

“The trickier part is getting [the fat] out of your body, and that’s what our whole programming is geared toward. But then [we] also take a look at what got you here and see what we need to do for the long term,” he says.

Patients are given detailed diet plans to help them cleanse their bodies and wean themselves off bad eating habits while going through the laser procedures. In addition, Tvrdik also helps them to find daily exercise activity to metabolize the fat the lasers are helping them burn. Even things as small as walking daily can help.

“Fat isn’t just this inconvenient thing that makes us look bad — it’s designed for periods of starvation,” Tvrdik says. Since people have food readily available to them at any time, he believes people need to teach their bodies not to store fat for food.

The clinic leaves no stone unturned in teaching patients the proper way to diet. In addition to lasers, the clinic also has several other spa options like infrared saunas, massage therapy, and a chiropractor to help patients get started on a healthier lifestyle.

“The human body is an amazingly resilient machine, until it’s not, and anything you can do to delay that process is a beautiful thing,” he says, adding that our metabolisms naturally slow with age. The first step in delaying that process is to start being mindful of your health now. LoHi can help, so stop in for a consultation.  Learn more about LoHi Lipo Laser Clinic at LoHiLipoLaser.com 42

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BRAND NEW @ OUTFRONTONLINE.COM

Brava CoolSculpt Reduction Augmentation Gynecomastia Top Surgery

Body CoolSculpt Vaser Liposculpture Abdominoplasty Bodylifts

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Keep the love, lose the handles.

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oolsculpting is a revolutionary, non-invasive procedure that uses the technology of cold temperatures to help eliminate unwanted deposits of fat. This procedure allows individuals living a healthy lifestyle to experience the body they have always wanted without the downtime required with other fat loss procedures.

The Process Using the power of cold temperatures to freeze and destroy fat cells, Coolsculpting is like no other fat reduction process. The process begins as a consultation with a physician that specializes in Coolsculpting. Once the candidate has been deemed a good candidate, the session can be scheduled.

Each session only takes about one hour to complete.

Once completed, there is virtually no downtime!

AESTHETIC SURGERY & DERMATOLOGY OF CHERRY CREEK Dr. Adrienne E. Stewart AdrienneStewartMD.com 3300 East 1 st Avenue, Ste. 400 Denver, CO 80206 303-333-6060

The Power of Cool Developed by Harvard scientists, Coolsculpting targets specific areas of the body including the abdominal region, inner and outer thighs, love handles, and back. The cooling process targets fat cells and literally kills them by freezing them.

There are no needles. No suction hoses. No scars and no kinves! Not to mention, Coolscuplting is a much more affordable option than other weight loss processes.

The Timeline Unlike other weight loss procedures, Coolsculpting takes very little time with little downtime. Each session lasts about an hour – the same time you would spend at the gym. A Coolsculpting session could be completed within a lunch hour!

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The Results Over time, fat cells die off and are disposed of in the natural process of elimination of the body. This is a gradual process that allows your body to maintain its normal day to day routines without the shock of surgery or rapid weight loss. Noticeable results are typically seen after one visit and can be further enhanced by additional appointments.

Are You Ready?

After a couple of months, your clothes will fit better and you will look and feel better. With a continued healthy lifestyle, the results should remain stable so the body you once had or have always wanted is sticking around. ¢ Please contact an office below for a consultation.

MURPHY PLASTIC SURGERY Dr. Terrence Murphy Chief of Plastic Surgery, Swedish Medical Center info@murphyplasticsurgery.com 799 E. Hampden Ave, Suite 540 Englewood, CO 80113 1-800-759-1005

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(303) 724-7770

Cosmetics UNIVERSITY OF COLORADO

www.cucosmetics.com

Stand Firm in the Face of Gravity

DGLFFL SPRING CHAMPIONSHIP

The Denver Gay and Lesbian Flag Football League’s 2014 Spring championship was held on June 1 in Congress Park. After a hard-fought season with plenty of thrills and spills, the Mighty Morphin Flower Arrangers took on the Naughty Nurses for the coveted Championship Trophy. After a stoic battle between the two titans of the gridiron, the Flower Arrangers came away victorious, 45 to 40. The post-game celebration immediately followed the game at Charlie’s. | Photos by Charles Broshous

See more photos online at ofcnow.co/flagchamp

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Family Centered Medicine

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See more photos at outfrontonline.com 46

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Denver’s

R E Y A G E D I R P FRIDAY, JUNE 20

Resident DJ Tony Alonso & Guest DJ Garth

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9pm

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Friendly and Accommodating Staff!

Starting at 4pm • DJ Don Wayne • DJ DonTron

Thursday June 26

Mark’s Birthday Bash Karaoke • Specials at 8, Show at 9!

Saturday June 28

Dj Nicotene presents “FILTHY” with guest Dj Guy Ruben from TrannyShack SF and midnight performance by Rolonda Flor!

145 Broadway • (303) 722-7977 facebook.com/CompoundBasix

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| JUNE 18, 2014 | 47

RA D I OAC T I V E V I S I O N

TWEET THIS! Nuclia Waste

M

r. Waste and I have good friends that live in the shadow of Lookout Mountain in Golden. They love their animals. Jeff is a veterinarian and Angela has worked for zoos throughout the country. In fact, they met working at a zoo and it was monkey love at first sight.

It’s never a surprise to walk up their driveway and see all manner of wild beasts running around their yard, from 100-year-old tortoises to injured eagles.

Toss in three dogs, three cats, three fish, and a turtle and you have the ingredients for a Dr. Dolittle sequel.

The latest edition to this land-locked ark is a Cooper’s hawk that has built a nest high in the cottonwood trees surrounding their house. They find it both strange and wonderful to have such a majestic bird perching right outside their bedroom window.

But strange things are occurring. The three bird feeders surrounding their house have required less and less filling. They assumed the hawk must be scaring away the local nuthatches, wood hatches, and wrens. Then one day, they saw what was really going on. A bird showed up for dinner, in swooped the hawk, and that bird was the dinner.

Those three bird feeders were not only fattening up the neighborhood birds, they were also bird magnets for an easy hawk meal.

Jeff and Angela were mortified. So they decided

the bird feeders must come down. They could not participate in the slaughter of these innocent birds.

When Jeff removed the feeders, he discovered the birdseed clumped together like a block of cement.

The hawk had been so successful at snatching free meals, that no beak had actually pecked a single seed.

There is a yin and yang to everything. Now the animal-friendly couple was faced with the possible starvation of their hawk and any offspring she might be raising. They decided it was all part of the circle of life, so the feeders are going right back up.

This got me thinking about all of nature’s checks and balances. As humans, we have eliminated all of our predators. We peck daily and greedily from the bird feeder we call Planet Earth … but where is the hawk to swoop in every once in a while to keep us in check?

I believe the planet itself is taking on that role.

We’ve done so much damage putting carbon into the air that global warming and climate change are rectifying the parasites called humankind. A super-tornado there, a few tsunamis here, and some uncontainable fires for good measure. It may take a while but Mother Earth will get balance restored, whether we like it or not.

Tweet on, my little chickadees.  Nuclia Waste, the Triple Nipple Drag Queen of Comedy, can be reached through her website at NucliaWaste.com.

Doggie day care Overnight boarding for dogs and cats Pet supplies Self-wash tubs Doggie park with a swimming pool Live doggie cam viewing Through our business partners Behavior modification training Grooming service

, City Bark is Your Pet s Home Away From Home!

City Bark Parker 9835 Mangano Lane (Lincoln & Jordan Rd.) 720.221.3267 48

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| JUNE 18, 2014 | BRAND NEW @ OUTFRONTONLINE.COM

City Bark Denver 2000 W. 8th Ave. (I-25 & 8th Ave.) 303.573.9400

GOGO / PERFORMER AUDITIONS @ X BAR

RU Entertainment, one of Denver’s most exuberant and talented dance teams, hosted GoGo / performer auditions at the X Bar on June 8. The event, which was hosted by Kiera Sexton, was an open casting call for GoGo, hoop, fire, aerial, and burlesque performers. Celebrity judges included Corky Blankenship, Cisco Yocisco, Bobby Lindsay, Ru Fi-o, Jessica Misdemeanor, and Ms. Easy. About a dozen performers brought their best moves in hopes of being selected to perform at future X Bar functions, Corky’s Pride Pool Party on June 20, and other miscellaneous events over the summer. | Photos by Charles Broshous

See more photos online at ofcnow.co/xbargogo

See more photos at outfrontonline.com BRAND NEW @ OUTFRONTONLINE.COM

| JUNE 18, 2014 | 49

BAR TAB

W E E K LY S P E C I A L S F R O M O U T F R O N T ' S L G B T- I N C LU S I V E B A R PA R T N E R S

AQUA LOUNGE

B ROA DWAYS

1417 Krameria, Denver (720) 287-0584 ofcnow.co/aqua

1027 Broadway, Denver (303) 623-0700 broadwaysdenver.com

HAPPY HOUR MON–FRI $2.50 wells & domestic bottles from 3–7pm

HAPPY HOUR Mon – Fri: 2–9pm Sat & Sun: 12–9pm $2.25 Wells, $2.00 Domestic Drafts $3.75 Svedka Flavors & Domestic Mini Pitchers

475 Santa Fe, Denver (303) 778-0545 facebook.com/BarkerLounge DAILY HAPPY HOURS 3–8pm & 11pm–close $3 Well/Wine/Domestic Bottles

BAR RICUDA'S 1076 Ogden St., Denver (303) 860-8353 barricudasdenver.com DAILY DRINK SPECIALS 2–4pm. & 10pm–midnight

B LACK CROWN 1446 S. Broadway, Denver (720) 353-4701 blackcrownlounge.com

CUSTOMER APPRECIATION NIGHT Mondays at 9pm

C HA R LI E'S ® 900 E. Colfax Ave., Denver (303) 839-8890 charliesdenver.com DAILY BEER SPECIAL $4 for a 32-oz. domestic pitcher and $8 for a premium pitcher THURSDAYS 1/2 price night FRIDAYS: BEER BUST $10 Buddy Beer Bust, 5pm $3 Absolut, 9pm

DAILY HAPPY HOUR 4–6PM

SATURDAYS $5 Beer Bust, 2pm

BR

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SUNDAYS Drag show, 9pm

BL

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11 TH AVE. V I N YL

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for interactive map

T

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.

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CHAR LI E ’S B LUS H & B LU

VD BL

DENVER E AG L E

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ES

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AL

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16 T

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DAILY HAPPY HOUR $3 wells, vino, domestics, lattes; $1.50 PBRs; $4 shots of Fireball. 3–7pm

AR

scan or visit

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T NU

D ENVER BA R M A P

COLORADO BLVD.

HAPPY HOURS Drink specials every day 3–6pm & $1 off any drink 6–8pm every day

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B OYZTOWN

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SUNDAYS Molly’s famous $4 Bloodys

A

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FRIDAYS Karaoke at 9pm

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N TO

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ET

SD

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EL P OT R ERO

B L AC K C ROW N

O N E CO LO R A D O PA RT Y @ T R AC KS

The One Colorado Pride Kickoff Party was held at Tracks Nightclub on May 31.

The event served as a benefit for One Colorado, which works to secure equality in the Centennial State. The event featured the musical stylings of DJ Chris Cornell. Another benefit for One Colorado, the 9th Annual Pink Party, hosted by Dr. Christopher Ott and Jeremy Simons, will be held at EXDO Hall on June 21. Tickets are on sale now at ofcnow.co/pink. | Photos by Charles Broshous

See more photos online at ofcnow.co/1cotracks

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EDIBLES: A MOST DELICIOUS WAY TO GET HIGH Elizabeth Barron

L

et me just say that I am daily smoker — have been for years — but even with all that experience under my belt, I was still not prepared for edibles.

Marijuana-laced food and drinks are the newest craze and hyped sensation in the legal marijuana industry. They give us the opportunity to experience THC through a totally different vehicle.

Edibles are appealing for a few different reasons. If you’re from out of town and staying at a hotel, cabin, etc., it’s likely against the rules for you to smoke where you’re staying (unless you have consent from the property owner). If you still want to get high, edibles are just the ticket.

As well, many people can’t or don’t want to inhale smoke. If that’s you, Mary Jane munchies are the way to go. They transport easily (within state borders, of course) and as I’m finding out, can be quite delicious.

Thanks to the always efficient and knowledgeable staff at Good Chemistry, I was able to try both Mountain Medicine’s Chocolate-Covered Pretzels and their Joyful Walnut Bite. Both were exceptionally delicious and paid ample homage to the sweet-toothed goddess that resides within me. The chocolate-covered pretzels came in a two-pack that offered a total of 100mg of active THC. The suggestion made by the salesperson was that I start with half to a measly quarter of a single pretzel. In a very general speculation, it would take the average person anywhere from 10-25mg of THC to get high.

Since each pretzel is a whopping 50mg, the salesperson was on point with this suggestion. Hold on to your hats ladies and gents, we’re going for a ride.

The pretzel itself was delicious — as any chocolate-covered pretzel will be — and it only tastes faintly of marijuana.

When I opened the sealed plastic, I could definitely smell weed. For anyone unfamiliar with consuming THC, it’s always in your best interest to start small. I, however, threw caution to the wind and ate a whole pretzel … and to the moon I went! It took about 45 minutes for the high to kick in, but it was intense and lasting.

I got a full-body high that stuck around for hours.

It wasn’t a sleepy, stoner high; I was mentally alert and effective. I remembered to go back downstairs and take my clothes out of the dryer (for once), but I did wrestle with a pretty extreme bout of the munchies. For a single, weak moment, I considered eating the second pretzel, but thankfully decided against it. The package of two pretzels retails at $10 (plus tax) and is worth every penny.

The next day I tried a “bite” of the Joyful Walnut Bite. It looked like an oversized, chocolate bon-bon and contained 100mg of active THC. If you are into coconut, THIS TREAT IS FOR YOU. It’s a mouthful of velvety, shredded coconut bathed in delicious dark chocolate. This time I was more

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self-aware and cautious.

I erred on the safe side and just nibbled a fourth of the candy. It did the trick. I like the high that I get from edibles even though it takes a bit longer for it to kick in. My mind isn’t clouded and I’m not forgetful. I can read, write, and communicate normally. It doesn’t make me want to lay down for a nap at 11am. I’m still able to be a fully functioning adult (sans driving) while being high. The quarter I ate was perfect and I grazed on a single chocolate for the rest of the day. I maintained my high and absolutely sated my chocolate goddess.

There are literally hundreds of edible and drinkable THC products I cannot wait to try.

I think I’ve found my niche. I love the way smoking weed smells and tastes, but supplementing with foods seems to be my new M.O. On top of that, the prices at Good Chemistry are phenomenal. For $20 and change, you get a sizeable amount of THC that’ll last what feels blissfully forever.

Give it a try. My final warning though is that edible forms of THC are incredibly potent. Like, “Yowza! What a kick in the pants” potent. Be careful, start small. Everyone reacts differently to everything so don’t be tough guys — it’ll Joyful Walnut Bite you in the butt. 

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THE NAKED PARTY VS THE SEX PARTY Scott McGlothlen

E

ver since a friend notoriously duped me into going to a “naked BBQ,” I’ve been hooked on social nudity. Sex wasn’t allowed, though, and by some, such a thing would be considered almost masochistic — like someone on a diet surrounded by cake.

But by not blowing my wad, the experience actually blew my mind.

I discovered that adding the word “naked” to any activity made it that much more interesting: yoga, hiking, water polo, and even dodgeball. But my favorite times were always the naked parties hosted by the original BBQ group. Gay men keeping things non-sexual seemed almost revolutionary.

But like most groups, the culture shifted as the years passed. The founder stepped back and the party frequency slowed down. And the parties also started getting increasingly sexual.

Most of the attendees seemed excited by the changes as they could now go off to dark corners and finish the deed. It didn’t seem all that disruptive at first. I even had to admit my own excitement for this new change. But with each new party, these boundaries seemed to fade further and further away.

At one point, an upcoming party invitation

made a bold, new announcement: “This is not a sex party. But frisky fun with friends is acceptable.”

The contradictory statement intrigued me.

However, the moment I stripped down, something in the air seemed different. Instead of boners being an occasional, amusing side effect of the environment, they popped up more frequently and with very intentional purposes.

The concept of the naked casual conversation started to disappear. I hadn’t gotten to socialize with much of anyone before guys started frantically dropping to their knees for blow jobs.

This was definitely a sex party. And with a sweaty smorgasbord of man-meat at arms reach, I should have been stoked. Instead I felt baffled. Why didn’t I feel more excited? Or even stranger, why did I feel bored?

Then suddenly I realized something: Out of all the edgy, sexual things I had done in my life, getting naked and NOT having sex was the wildest.

The concept often challenged my naughtiest of friends. And now that all the guys were going nuts, the whole concept didn’t seem so revolutionary anymore. Instead it felt predictable … as if this was totally expected of gay men.

I politely exited the orgy madness and found another guy chilling on the sidelines. Striking up a casual conversation, I hoped to find comfort

back in the old format of platonic nudity. But it wasn’t long before another gentlemen stepped into the conversation. He didn’t say a word; he just continued to masturbate and grope himself while creepily staring directly into our eyes. He clearly didn’t want to chat.

And then I realized something else: My intentions to chat with the other guy weren’t honestly all that honorable either. I thought he was attractive and if I was going to get frisky with someone, I wanted it to be with him.

This was a huge departure from my mentality at previous parties. I typically socialized with people not based on their looks but more so their character. It seemed that when sex got thrown into the mix, I began only wanting to socialize with those who I might want to hook up with and no one else. And for me, that was a less desirable side of me.

When platonically socializing in the nude, I redirected my sexual energy in other positive ways. I got to interact on a whole other level of exposure and my guards came down … my body image issues melted away. Now with sex back in the mix, my guards were back up and my main concern was about how attractive I looked.

As I gave up and left the party, I didn’t have any qualms or judgments towards the other partygoers for getting their freak on. Hell, years earlier I would have happily joined in. But after having kept these parties platonic for so long, I came face-to-face with the values that I lost by reintroducing sex.  Scott McGlothlen is a cultural columnist on life as a HIV-positive gay man. See more of Scott’s columns online at ofcnow.co/scott or contact him at scott@outfrontonline.com.

S E X P E RT: LU B E I S LOV E Dear Shanna, I know that at Pride, places hand out condoms and lube like it’s the second coming (pun intended). So while I totally get the concept of handing out condoms, what does lube have to do with it? Is it really that big of a deal?

Learning to Love Lube in Superior.

A little can go a long way.

(Slÿd Body Glide available myslyd.com) 54

Dear Learning to Love Lube, You know, I love this question because I love lube, I think you should love lube, and honestly, one of my few “rules” to having good sex is that lube is love.

First of all, let’s just break it down based on the body.

Regardless of what type of body you’re playing with, lube is a bonus. Penises don’t naturally lubricate; that’s why guys use all sorts of things for lubrication when jacking off: olive oil, Crisco, soap, lotion, you name it. Given this fact, why anyone would try giving a hand job without lube is beyond me. Make it nice and slippery, and you’ll be an expert in the field.

Anuses never ever ever ever ever ever lubricate. Not ever. Not using lube of some kind during any type of anal penetration (fingers, toys, or penises) actually puts the anus at risk for tearing. While some of these tears are larger and obvious (i.e. someone is feeling pain from anal sex, which is a sign to STOP), a lot of them can be micro-tears. These allow for higher risk of transmitting various STIs (sexually transmitted infections), and can lead to anal infections.

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Adding a bit of lube can lower these risks, reduce tearing, and lead to a happier butt post-anal.

Vulvas, and more specifically, vaginas, can and do lubricate on a more regular basis, but lots of things can dry up vaginal lubrication, like hormonal birth control, stress, antihistamines (any allergy meds), and just being dehydrated.

Vaginal tissue is subject to tears, both macro and micro, as well, so using lube makes for happier and healthier vaginas all around.

So lube can help sex feel better by reducing the friction slightly (if you feel like you somehow put on TOO much lube, you can always wipe off the excess), it can lower risks of STI transmission, it can help with condom integrity to lower the chance of condoms breaking, and can help keep the areas down please happy, healthy, and infection free.

Not too shabby if you ask me. As a side note, spit is great for reactivating lubricant, but is usually not enough to act as a lubricant, as it is really just glorified water. Consider water-based or silicone-based lube for any penetration, and oil-based lube for jacking off and hand jobs.

Enjoy a slippery summer of lube fun!

Shanna.

Have a question you’d like to ask Shanna (anonymously)?

Email shannakatz@gmail.com. Shanna Katz, M.Ed, ACS is a Colorado-born fierce femme and board-certified sexologist.

She believes strongly in open source, accessible sexuality education, and loves teaching adults how to optimize their sex lives. For more info, please visit ShannaKatz.com.

The Seven Deadly Sins of Relationships Brent Heinze

A

lthough many of us love the idea of bathing in a sea of excess, cardinal sins can cause so much upheaval in our lives, they have the potential to tear apart meaningful interactions with others.

Not only can they serve to weaken and destroy romantic relationships, they also has a profoundly negative impact on the way we feel about other people in our environment. They can cause dysfunction and reinforce ideas that our relationships are chaotic, unfulfilling, and tragic. Beware when these get out of balance!

Feeling scorned can be awful, but also quite addictive. So many people in our community live in a place of frustration, anger, and bitterness. Not only can this turn people away from wanting to spend time with us, but reinforces that we are surrounded by storm clouds just waiting to screw up our day.

There are absolutely times where we want to focus only our own desires. This could also be perceived as extremely selfish and can be a sign of the need to make up for a lack of fulfillment internally.

Getting what we want may mean keeping secrets,

going behind someone’s back, or dismissing other’s wishes to get our own needs met.

This can look many different ways in our relationships. It may happen when we don’t address issues that tend to fester and may blow up in our faces if not discussed. We may drag our feet with situations that may be confrontational, uncomfortable, or cause us to look at things that may beat up our self-esteem.

As we challenge our own ideas of self-worth and possibly low self-esteem, it can be easy to move to a place of overcompensation. We might build a false persona to show power instead of finding a balance of self-improvement activities to address our confidence issues.

Of all of these sins, this is the most fun for most of us. It can be so easy to get wrapped up in it — feelings for another person can be incredibly intense.

Hopefully we are fortunate enough to cross paths with those who bring up feelings of passion and connection, while making particular body parts

swell and our minds wander into all the delicious possibilities. Unfortunately, lust can cause us to lose focus on the important things in life, like friendships and other responsibilities.

It’s not unusual to want what others have, but if we spend our energy focusing on being jealous of others, we don’t enjoy our own path of living and trying to shape our lives in meaningful ways.

Not only can our perceptions be wrong about other people, but it makes us focus on what we don’t have.

Too much is never enough, right? It is natural to want more of a good thing, but we all know what can happen when we overeat at buffets.

Regardless if we are talking about hooking up, partying, having fun, shopping, or getting obsessed over the hottest new fad, this can cause us to get wrapped up a single focus that may keep us from engaging in the rest of our life. Sometimes moderation is a good thing.  Brent Heinze, LPC, is a licensed professional counselor. Get more HeinzeSight online at ofcnow.co/brent or send him a question for his column at PerspectiveShift@yahoo.com.

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