November 16, 2016 :: The Men's Issue

NOVEMBER 16, 2016 | OUTFRONTONLINE .COM | FREE

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CONTENTS NOVEMBER 16, 2016 VOL40 NO16

20 08 A LETTER TO A YOUNG, CLOSETED ME 10 RUGGED GOOD LOOKS, MINUS RUGGED SKIN 16 WAIT: FEMININE GAY MEN ARE ‘BAD PR’ FOR ‘STRAIGHT-ACTING’ GAY MEN? 28 THE GAY PAMPHLET

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32 THE DANGERS OF “PARTY AND PLAY”

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36 DESTINATION ACCESSIBLE: UTAH’S ZION NATIONAL PARK 40 PATAGONIAN PURITY 44 CALENDAR 55 CUTTING THROUGH THE BULLSH*T OF CIRCUMCISION 62 ASK A SLUT

ON THE COVER Model Topher LaFleur takes his bike for a ride in the sun-dappled Highlands.

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Photography by Molly McCormmick.

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Ryan Howe

IN CASE YOU

MISSED IT THE HOTTEST STORIES ON OUTFRONTMAGAZINE.COM

MAN CONVICTED OF QUEER ATLANTA WOMAN’S GRUESOME RAPE AND MURDER GIVEN FOUR LIFE SENTENCES A man accused of the brutal assault and murder of an Atlanta LGBT activist was found guilty of murder, rape, aggravated assault, and aggravated sodomy on Monday.

Donte Lamar Wyatt broke into 37-year-old Catherine Montoya’s home in East Atlanta and killed her in April 2015.

DeKalb County authorities say Wyatt raped the victim and strangled her with a scarf. This was after stabbing another woman in a Waffle House and fleeing from police.

The jury found him guilty after just half an hour of deliberation. West was given four life sentences, plus an additional 41 years in prison.

The first three life sentences are without parole.

“This was a horrific, unspeakable crime, and he deserves nothing less than to spend the rest of his life in prison,” District Attorney Robert James said. “We want to assure them that he will never, ever be able to do this to anyone else.”

After killing her, he stole Montoya’s car, crashed it, and broke into another house. Police were finally able to apprehend him after a four-hour standoff that included tear gas. (While incarcerated, West also reportedly strangled his cellmate and scraped out his eyeballs.)

A spokesperson from Seeds of Love, a local LGBT group, called Montoya “a shining star in our movement, a tireless champion for immigrant rights, for AAPI women’s rights, for racial and LGBTQ justice.”

“She spoke truth to power with a smile and laughter,” they added, “and lovingly challenged us all to be our better selves.”

See the rest of the stories at OutFrontMagazine.com

MISSISSIPPI GOVERNOR STILL FIGHTING TO PASS RELIGIOUS EXEMPTION LAW The governor of Mississippi is still fighting to pass a discriminatory law that would permit business and government employees to deny services to same-sex couples if they say it’s against their religion.

It’s basically the same bill that vice president hopeful Mike Pence passed in Indiana a few short years ago. Visit Indy — Indianapolis’ convention and tourism organization — found that Indiana lost at least $60 million in revenue after lawmakers there passed the so-called Religious Freedom Restoration Act, which gave businesses the greenlight to discriminate against LGBT people on religious grounds.

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Mississippi’s Gov. Phil Bryant signed the law that is designed to protect the religious beliefs that marriage is only between a man and a woman, that sex should only happen within a marriage, and that a person’s gender can’t be altered once it is determined at birth.

state’s Democratic Attorney General Jim Hood declined to appeal the judge’s ruling.

But US District Judge Carlton Reeves blocked the “religious freedom” law in July right before it was supposed to go into effect because he said it was unconstitutional and created unequal treatment for LGBT people.

“This bill merely reinforces the rights which currently exist to the exercise of religious freedom as stated in the First Amendment to the US Constitution,” Bryant said in a statement defending the bill.

But, it seems his bigotry runs deep as he continues to fight for the bill. Bryant is asking a federal appeals court to uphold the law through private attorneys, as the

Supporters say the law will protect people’s religious belief that marriage should only be between a man and a woman.

Opponents say it violates the equalprotection guarantee of the Constitution.

Judge Reeves wrote that everything about the bill indicates that it “was the state’s attempt to put LGBT citizens back in their place” after the Supreme Court ruled on the side of marriage equality last year.

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PERSPECTIVES

A LETTER TO A YOUNG, CLOSETED ME HEY PRE-GAY, SMALL-TOWN CHRIS. THIS IS YOU IN A DECADE OR SO. Good news! You’re in your upper-twenties and a full-blown homo now. (Pun intended, congrats.) It took you a while, but you’ve almost figured it out.

Here are a few tidbits to keep in mind as you evolve from a straight Wyoming boy to a raging queen.

First, you’re neither of those things, and you know it. Stop thinking that just because you tell people you want nothing to do with vaginas, you’re suddenly dropped into this category where you have to find a new identity. It’s way simpler than that. You don’t need a new Hollister wardrobe or an emergency drag costume. You look terrible in drag, and shaving is the worst.

There will be a long period of your twenties where you don’t say “yes” anymore — it’s now enthusiastically pronounced “YAHHSS.” Let it happen. One of the best parts of being gay is the trendy language you’re allowed to adopt. Also, you’ll call your other gay male friends “girl” and “kween,” and everyone will be pretty ok with it.

Find that balance between knowing who’s in it for the hookup and who to keep around as a friend. You’re going to use gay apps, and they’re going to seem really weird at first. Guys will randomly send their d*cks to you, and you can basically order a blowjob if you want one. You’ll be pretty good at staying safe, but approach each situation openly. Don’t feel obligated to respond to anyone, but if you find yourself in a place where it seems like there’s more there, let him know, and hopefully he’ll return the favor. Gay apps are generally awful for dating.

Gay bars are only as scary as you make them.

You’re going to avoid a lot of bars on Colfax until you’re comfortable. That’s mostly because you’re from Wyoming. Once you ease your way in, don’t be afraid to talk to people. And bring your parents eventually. They’ll think the patios are cute and flip over happy-hour prices.

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Your parents. Dude. You will spend a couple years flat-out lying to them about your life. But that’s not really new, is it? Your plan is to wait until you have a boyfriend so your mom won’t try to find you one.

Totally valid, but seriously, just tell them. Some guys have it way worse than you. Don’t be dramatic, kiddo.

They’re waiting.

You’re going to meet plenty of guys who are older and wiser than you.

Remember the wiser part, and you can basically ignore the older part … unless they’re your dad’s age and want to cuddle — you’re cool to bypass that. Settling for a sugar daddy may seem appealing at many points, but you know what you want.

Trust your instinct.

You’ll lose weight by accident. Then you’ll get fat again. That’s what comfortable relationships can do to a fella, so try to not let it bother you.

Other gay guys might be picky, but you’re doing just fine. You do you.

Exercise for your own happiness. The good guys can look past a little jiggle.

Chris Arneson

Your plan is to wait until you have a boyfriend so your mom won’t try to find you one.

Totally valid, but seriously, just tell them. Some guys have it way worse than you. Don’t be dramatic, kiddo.

They’re waiting.

Being an average gay guy isn’t that bad. Sooner than later, you’re going to figure out the gay community is hella diverse. You’ll be attracted to guys who want nothing to do with you, and in turn, you’re going to want to avoid some guys who really like you.

You’ve never been good with being one of the guys, and you won’t really get better at it. (I still don’t know if people actually do.) Just because the world now knows you like d*ck doesn’t mean you get less socially awkward — sorry.

But it does get better. And gays are way cooler than you ever expected. Welcome to the club.

LEGAL DIRECTORY

Everyone is Talking about

!

THE LOWDOWN ON WORKPLACE PROTECTIONS ANYONE CAN EXPERIENCE EMPLOYMENT DISCRIMINATION. IT CAN HAPPEN AT many different points in the process of getting and keeping a job. Here are five areas of concern for people who are LGBTQ or HIV positive, as well as some basic information about what you need to know to protect your rights.

HIRING AND PROMOTION Ideally, employers would hire and promote the person with the best qualifications for a job, but that’s not always the case. It’s easier to prove a claim of discrimination when someone has made sexually explicit remarks or has demonstrated discriminatory traits or behaviors. Such cases can be very difficult and complex.

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Workplace discrimination can create a hostile work environment — overt harassment, the threat of violence, or even blackmail still happen in the workplace today. Some employers, especially larger ones, have HR departments that should be able to handle the issue, but you may also want to seek legal counsel to protect your rights.

WRONGFUL TERMINATION One of the most common types of employment discrimination is wrongful termination.

Generally, employers may not need to present compelling reasons for the termination.

However, if discrimination is suspected, the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC) will investigate the claims.

SEXUAL HARASSMENT Sexual harassment laws apply equally to individuals of the same or different sexes. If you’re the victim of sexual harassment at work, you have specific options available to you, as well as certain obligations. First, you should ask the harasser to stop, then alert your HR Department if you have one. Most companies have sexual-harassment policies that explain how to make a complaint. If yours does, it’s your obligation to follow that process. If you cannot reconcile the situation, you may want to seek legal advice.

GENDER IDENTITY OR EXPRESSION Gender stereotypes, health insurance, and restroom access policies are common areas that transgender and gender-nonconforming employees frequently face.

Discrimination because one is gender non-conforming has been held by the Supreme Court to be sex discrimination and the EEOC and federal courts recognize that Title VII of the Civil Rights Act also prohibits discrimination of transgender employees. If an employer is not open to discussions regarding these and similar matters, it might be necessary to seek assistance from the EEOC or an attorney who has experience in trans-related legal matters.

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The opinions expressed in this article are general in nature. For specific legal advice, please contact an attorney.

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D E G G RU D O O G , S K LOO S U N I M D E G G RU SKPLEISNKINCARE FOR ZIEGLER N I T S I R K

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SIM ADO MEN COLOR

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oloradans look way older,” a tourist by way of Orlando loudly remarked at a south Broadway brewery.

“They definitely wrinkle younger than we do in Florida.”

Coloradans know they’re hot. It’s not that our egos are just as high as our altitude, it’s

list of the most physically fit states in the country. Also, a 2015 study declared Denver the most sexually active city in the country, thus we can only conclude we are doing something very, very right. So our little sightseer’s savage observation didn’t go down nearly as smooth as the craft beer we were drinking (beer being something else we do better than other states).

Unfortunately, a little digging into the subject of skincare and climate revealed that there is some truth to the assertion that Colorado skin ages faster than skin in other environments. Even more upsetting, the culprit is the very thing so many of us love the most about our beautiful state … … our abundant sunshine.

“The sun in Colorado is one of the biggest factors in damaging the skin and causing aging, along with how dry it is here,” says Kai Robinson, an esthetician at Brows on Upper 15th. With almost a decade of experience in skincare, Kai knows all the layers of Colorado skin’s unique needs. “When the skin is deprived of moisture and hydration it can appear dull, and actually make fine lines and wrinkles stand out more.”

But don’t let those crow’s feet concerns keep you from enjoying our state’s beautiful outdoor offerings and activities. Adding just a couple of extra minutes and products into your everyday routine can keep your skin looking and feeling youthful, healthy, and hydrated.

“One thing I would tell everyone in Colorado is to use a daily SPF during all four seasons of the year,” she recommends.

“Everyday,” she emphasizes.

Kai suggests finding a moisturizer with SPF already added. A

moisturizer with sunscreen cuts down on counter space, time, and money. And even though moisturizer is your most valuable weapon in the quest for younger-looking skin in our harsh Colorado climate, it’s the last of three very important steps.

Before you apply moisturizer, it’s important to cleanse and then tone your skin. Kai recommends Astara Cleansing Gele for gently cleaning your face and neck. Not only does the product smell great, but Astara knows Colorado skin — the allnatural skincare company crafts all of its products in Telluride. For a good toner, Kai’s go-to is witch hazel. It’s an inexpensive option that is readily available at most grocery stores.

“Just throw some on a cotton pad and wipe over your entire face, and you’re good to go,” she says.

Other skin essentials Robinson suggests keeping on hand include exfoliating scrubs — which she suggests using at least two times a week, anti-aging serum for fine lines around the eyes, and jojoba oil for extra-dry winter days. Treating yourself to a relaxing monthly facial is also a wonderful way to keep your skin fresh. (Keyword: relaxing. Stress isn’t good for you or your skin.)

Finally, a good skincare routine isn’t the only secret for a more youthful appearance. Many men neglect eyebrow taming and upkeep, which can dramatically turn back the hands of time. And as a bonus, Kai adds, your eyebrow service may come with the added benefit of scoring free custom tips and secrets for better skin.

“Coming in to get your brows done can open up your eyes and give you a younger, natural-looking lift, and your esthetician can educate you on how to take care of your skin while you’re at it.”

just an objective fact that Coloradans are a good-looking bunch. Our beautiful state (and even more beautiful people) always tops the

For more information on skin and brow care, contact Kai Robinson at Brows on Upper 15th at (720) 855-3021.

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) Y (GA S ’ N MESTAFRIEND SCAY ANNA BI

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s a doting lesbian, I’ve been let down for decades by the Idiot Box in my living room. Year after year, TV shows and movies have shoved in my face how far superior the straight-woman/ gay-man relationship is compared to every other buddy match. I’m sure you don’t need examples — the evidence is everywhere. At any rate, let me be the first to call bullsh*t! Gay BFFs, how do I love thee? Let me count the ways.

WE’LL NEVER HAVE SEXUAL TENSION. LIKE … EVER. You don’t want me. I don’t want you. (High-five!) Unlike friendships we’ve both had with straight folks, there will never, ever be creepy, hidden, unspoken — or worse: spoken — feelings of attraction.

That’s basically everything. We’re like siblings we got to choose!

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WE’LL NEVER TRY AND HIT ON ONE ANOTHER’S BOO.

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PHOTO // PRISCILLA WESTRA

That scintillating gentleman you brought to my office Christmas party is landing eyes from every other woman in the room but me.

And when we all leave together, you can always trust that my laughter at his jokes are genuine.

Ditto for when I introduce you to

the chick I’ve been trying to make out with since we met — I can totally count on you to never try and make a move when I step outta the room. I love that about us.

WE KNOW WHAT IT’S LIKE GROWING UP GAY. Remember when we’d wait until your parents were out of town to pop in DVDs of Queer As Folk? Or how you’d come over and pretend that you were the one who was into The L Word when my stepdad walked into the living room? The best! We totally had an alibi in one another because our parents weren’t yet cool with the whole “gay thing.”

WE’D AVOID WEIRD QUESTIONS AT FAMILY VISITS BY “DATING.” Gone were the awkward days of “Who are you seeing?” from Aunt Nancy and Uncle Paul every Thanksgiving. Since we became BFFs, everyone just assumes we’re seeing one another. Even if they knew in their heart of hearts that we were total “gaymoes,” the cessation of those annoying questions was fine by us!

In short, I think our friendships are so often overlooked, and I love that you guys have loved us back for some of the best years of our lives.

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Y D BO : R E G AISSUE, TOO IM MALE SOTO JOSEPH

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ecently, I decided to get serious about losing weight.

I want to run the Colfax Half Marathon in May and I’d like to be able to get down in the club without needing to take a hydration break every fifteen minutes, both of which are goals that require me to be in better shape than I am. The problem is, I’m also caught in a love triangle with chocolate-frosted donuts and tacos, so losing weight has always been a challenge for me. As a gay man, the challenge of losing weight and leading a healthier lifestyle (because those two aren’t necessarily synonymous) is made that much more perilous by the fact that gay culture has a history of being disturbingly harsh and discriminatory toward male bodies that aren’t tight, toned, and tanned.

In a society where gay men are still more likely to be discriminated against in the workplace, are still more likely to be the victims of hate crimes, and are still more likely to be denied equal access to the privileges and responsibilities of citizenship, it makes little sense why we wouldn’t care for each other and love each other for who we are right now. You might be reading this and wondering why I’m being so dramatic. Well, that’s because devaluing gay men because of their bodies has dramatic consequences.

The National Eating Disorders Association reported that gay men are three times as likely to have been diagnosed with an eating disorder as straight men. The

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backbreaking standard we have

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2010 research highlighted by NBC suggests that those in relationships with men (gay men and straight women) most often felt pressure to be thin, and rates of obesity support that idea. Numbers aside, I bet many of you out there can relate to this.

It doesn’t take much effort to find someone whose boyfriend or partner has either pressured them to be thin or made them feel insecure for being overweight. Certainly, a positive environment within a relationship can go a long way toward creating a healthy desire to want to get your sweat on and drop some lbs.

It can even be a surprisingly sensual experience to get your heart rate up at the gym with your boo. However, we as a gay community have created such a toxic environment for each other that we make it impossible for ourselves to handle our weight in a way that’s healthy for our own bodies, while also punishing each other for not losing that weight in the first place.

Certainly, we can do better as a community than we have been.

for tight, muscular male bodies has only intensified since the 1970s, and men with eating disorders have a higher mortality rate than females.

It is difficult to completely link higher rates of eating disorders and a higher mortality rate with our disturbing body-image standards, but we absolutely know gay men are dying over this issue. We’re not any different than straight men, so what could possibly account for those drastic — and frankly, dangerous — differences between us? I’m all for breaking a sweat, and I enjoy abs and muscles as much as the next guy, but is it worth it if all we’re getting is a community that’s sicker, less happy, and closer to death?

Fellas, I’m not saying getting and staying in shape is a bad thing, because we know that’s not the case.

What I am saying is that as hard as it can be to keep our bodies healthy and exercise regularly, we ought to consider loving each other for what our bodies look like right now.

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E N I N I M FE N ARE E M Y A G ’ R P D ‘B‘ASTRAIGHT-ACTING’ WAIT:

ODE CAL STR

FOR N? E M Y A G

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ome certainly think so. It’s time to talk about “straight acting” and pass privilege.

Results from a European award-winning study released last month found that those who had not experienced homophobia in school were more than twice as likely to have used the phrase “straight acting” to describe themselves.

Respondents who reported using the term “straight acting” to describe themselves were also: 37% more likely to agree with the statement, “Feminine gay men give gay men like me a bad reputation.”

33% less likely to indicate that they’ve faced homophobia or discrimination on the basis of their sexuality in the last five years.

NOVEMBER 16, 2016

35% more likely to agree with the statement, “I identify more with the heterosexual community than with the gay community.”

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The study surveyed 280 gay men based in the United Kingdom and California.

The study found that gay men who’d described themselves as straight acting were less likely to have directly experienced homophobia, less likely to see issues like discrimination as something that could personally affect them, and in turn, less likely to challenge homophobia when they see it. Meanwhile,

those who had directly experienced the consequences of homophobia and discrimination were more likely to take an active role in trying to improve society’s perceptions of their community, fighting to change the value attached to their group rather than dissociating themselves from it.

Personally, I believe we all strive to have a positive self-conception.

We want to believe that any group we belong to is positively distinct from others. Social Identity Theory suggests that if we feel this isn’t the case, we will either be compelled to try to migrate to another group with perceived higher status, or fight to change the values attached to the group we belong to.

This certainly seems to chime with a lot of what we see in the gay community today. Feminine gay men are caught in the crossfire of a battle that self-described straight-acting gay men are having with themselves. The way gay men market themselves is more visible than ever before because of the rise of apps like Grindr. This brings things like femophobia to the surface, and we need to take every opportunity to challenge that.

It’s not helpful to demonize people who use the term straight acting, but we should challenge them to realize when they’re speaking from a place of internalized homophobia or a position of pass privilege.

We can’t expect everyone to have an academic understanding of oppression, privilege, and the role they themselves are playing in things, so we have to find constructive ways to start conversations and challenge people in ways that bring them along with us.

“This is actually common across socially stigmatized groups. You often see examples of attempted identity migration over to a group with the perceived higher status, though this is only really an option when the boundaries between the two groups are perceived to be permeable for those who can pass,” says Fernando Lopez, LGBT history expert and director of San Diego Pride.

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8 MOS + PHOTO // COLE HUSTON

“If people expressing these views can pass as straight in their day-today lives, they don’t have to deal with that same kind of discrimination.

But for the people who live a different kind of life and have more of a struggle for standing out as not masculine, it means more to them to become activists and to do something, [because] they have seen the oppression in a way that somebody who can pass as straight never does.”

He continues: “A big part of homophobia, internalized and otherwise, rests in chauvinism and femophobia: the fear of all things feminine and being feminine, because it’s seen as weak. This isn’t a new thing, but it’s certainly more visible and pervasive than ever before because of the rise of apps like Grindr and other dating apps where we can see the way people are marketing themselves. The trend of some gay men excessively using hyper-masculine language is symptomatic of this — terms like ‘dude’ and ‘bro.’ Interestingly, because the media would initially only portray gay men as this sort of hyper-effeminate caricature, gay men of the 1970s rebelled against that and that’s where the bodybuilding movement came from. That’s where the whole grungy men of the 70s with beards and bushy hair originated. They all wore flannel and work boots. That style was very much an intentional decision to hyper-masculinize the gay male community, so as to push-back against the heterosexualmale-run media. But today it seems that more people are pushing back against themselves.”

Got a rebuttal or a shoutout? Reach Cal on Twitter: @Calstrode

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“For example, we might see Latino people changing their names, something we call ‘whiting-out your name’ here in California. I know a lot of people who go by John, for example, whereas their real name is Juan. [I’ve heard] Michael when their real name is Miguel. Mine would be Frank or something for example — but I like Fernando.

THE OF Y T U BEA LINITY U C S MA ADDISON WHEELER HERRON

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or many, masculinity has become a dirty word. It shares connotations with macho, and calls to mind images of loud, brash individuals engaging in rash or aggressive behavior.

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Given the realities of human interaction and attraction, however, this is simply not fair. Outside of these negative stereotypes, masculinity simply means exhibiting the personality traits typically associated with the male gender.

While most have pretty much agreed to embrace the ideas that gender is a construct created by society, and there is no real way for the sexes to act, masculine traits can be helpful in shaping and forming a desired gender identity.

For example, a cisgender or trans male may take pride in having a well-groomed beard, embracing “male” fashion trends, or lifting weights to maintain a more malelooking physique.

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PHOTO // ALEX JONES

And men aren’t alone in this feeling of shame. Women are often faced with the same quandary.

Those who identify as female and embrace feminine fashion or beauty standards are often chided that shaving their legs, wearing dresses, or spending time on beauty concerns like hair and makeup simply reinforces negative stereotypes that have held women down since the beginning.

However, the way I see it, expressing your gender identity loudly and proudly if you choose to identify as male or female doesn’t mean you are just buying into what society wants you to do; it’s a great way to feel more yourself and comfortable in your own skin.

And for those who find masculinity attractive, individuals who do things like maintain nice-looking beards or wear sexy scents of male cologne or deodorant are highlighting their sexiness for their partners and loved ones.

Even better, because we are finally escaping the gender binary, this no longer has to be limited to cisgender women seeking out and tying down cisgender men. In a variety of sex and gender combinations, as well as non-traditional relationships, the sexiness of masculinity can stand out.

Of course, this does not mean “masculinity” can be used as an excuse for poor behavior. Being aggressive or angry is not a masculine or male thing, although it is true that testosterone can cause these behaviors in some individuals (one of the sideeffects trans men often face when undergoing hormone therapy). So it’s important to understand the distinction between biological sex and hormones and gender identity and expression. Having a penis or lots of testosterone might increase the likelihood to exhibit some masculine traits, but this doesn’t mean masculinity can be an excuse for bad behavior. Instead, it should be a way to highlight the goodness and sexiness in an individual.

Long story short, masculinity is beautiful. It’s attractive and appealing to those who crave the masculine romantically and sexually, and it’s a wonderful way to express gender and identity. As long as it isn’t used as a crutch to justify bad behavior, the masculine can be extremely empowering.

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, S E D U D A G O Y O D . SMITH M N I V E K

S S E N T I F D E T A N I YS M U O G D O T E L G A N I M E M F O E C TH TY IS WEL D MIND ACTIVI ROVE BODY AN TO IMP

D

avid Michael Scott’s first yoga class was typical for a guy.

“I remember absolutely hating it,” Scott recalls.

He thinks about trying to twist his arms and legs into eagle pose. “I remember thinking, ‘What the hell am I doing?’”

Scott says.

That was 13 years ago, when a girlfriend at the time convinced him to go. Scott was going to stick with martial arts, which seemed more “manly.”

NOVEMBER 16, 2016

“My thought was, ‘Yoga is for girls,’” Scott recalls.

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Today, Scott tells about how practicing yoga was — and is — life-changing. That’s a sentiment shared by many, regardless of gender. But fewer men start or stick with yoga.

“The practice helped me so much spiritually and physically,” Jaime Philp says.

Philp has been a certified yoga instructor for more than a decade. He started

yoga as he sought relief to physical ailment. Philp has been running since he was 12 years old and worked in construction much of his life.

body movements,” Scott says.

“The combination of those two things took its toll on my back,” Philp explains. In 2002, that started affecting his running. “Running was my escape, it was my form of meditation, and it wasn’t pleasant anymore,” Philp said.

Someone suggested trying yoga, so Philp did.

Yoga also focuses on meditation. Yes, sometimes there’s “ommm” chanting, but often it’s about taking just a moment of stillness and creating mindfulness. Scott was aware that there was a connection between yoga and meditation before he returned to it, but was dismissive.

He had used self-taught meditation as a teenager.

“It changed my life completely,” Philp says. “I went right back to running with no problems.”

PHYSICAL BENEFITS Yoga is more than just stretching. There are multiple physical benefits from increased flexibility to improved internal health.

Scott likes to focus on the tangible, external benefits.

“What is key is how it stimulates stabilization around different joints and

Plus the increased circulation can help internal organs.

MENTAL BENEFITS

“Meditation, to me, was a way to calm my anger,” Scott says. As a teen, he was getting into fights to defend himself.

“Meditation was a way to calm my anger and address my depression — my general disposition of life and the world, so to speak,” Scott says.

In his late 20s, Scott started going back to yoga classes about once every month or so, then taught himself man

poses with the help of an illustrated book while he lived abroad for the Peace Corps.

While Philp started yoga to relieve physical ailment, he talks more about spiritual healing.

“It changed my whole outlook on my physical condition and my spiritual awareness,” Philp says. And that shows up in his classes.

“When I teach, I use the word ‘awareness’ quite often,” Philp says. “It made me more aware of my existence, what I was doing, what were the reasons for my happiness and unhappiness.”

MINDFULNESS Practicing the physical yoga often leads to healthy lifestyle changes. “Yoga asks that you become aware, or it drives you in that direction,” Philp explains. “So it made me aware that my back was not as strong and I wasn’t paying attention enough to it. So yoga turned that around and

He said it makes him more aware of everything he does physically as well as what he puts into his body, so everything from diet to physical labor Philp does with mindfulness and attitude of healthy behavior.

“As guys, we typically treat our bodies a little bit harder than women, just because of the occupations we typically engage in, so that — in a physical sense — is one of the biggest reasons to begin practice yoga, so that we can offset some of the damage we’ve done to our bodies.”

GETTING STARTED “One of the mistakes that yoga students make when beginning their practice is going to the wrong class,” Philp notes. “So if you don’t go to a beginner’s class, chances are yoga will turn you off. It will be too much, you’ll think you stepped into

something that maybe you’ve bit off more than you can chew.”

There are power vinyasas, which will move quickly from one advanced and challenging pose to the next. There are also gentle and beginner classes to ease into simple poses and learn to grow in the practice.

There are no wrong poses; the point is to try to work toward the textbook pose while maintaining awareness and avoiding injury.

Philp said yogis become intimately familiar with their strengths, weaknesses, and limitations.

“You learn to honor those,” Philp explains. “And within those boundaries of your awareness is where your practice lies.”

While it’s popular for women to wear yoga pants and tank tops, Scott and Philp emphasized there is no incorrect attire for yoga. It’s about feeling comfortable. Philp recommends gym shorts or sweatpants and a loose-fitting shirt. Scott says he sometimes shows up in jeans just to mix it up.

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allowed me to strengthen the proper back muscles necessary to continue my construction work and my running.”

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NOVEMBER 16, 2016

INSIDE THE COVER SHOOT Model Topher LaFleur takes his bike for a ride in the sun-dappled Highlands.

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Photography by Molly McCormmick.

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I C S A M K S A 4M GUNN O’BRIAN

f you’ve ever used apps like Scruff, Grindr, or GROWLr, or even dating sites like OkCupid, you’ve likely run across more than a few profiles where the guy mentions something about masculinity.

In fact, his masculinity may be one of the very first things he mentions, almost as if to save viewers the time/trouble of having to quick-scan his profile to determine his masculine quota.

With ever-shortening attention spans and more options than ever for finding your next hookup or boyfriend, it makes sense to lead with the goods rather than bury them in useless information like your passions, occupation, favorite music, and your name.

When was this seed first planted?

When did it become so essential for gay men to wear their masculinity (both manufactured and authentic) on their hairy, tattooed, pumped-up arms?

NOVEMBER 16, 2016

FROM THE WITHERED ROOT TO THE RIPPLING FRUIT

24

Gay history tells us that it was the AIDS epidemic of the 80s that reduced many gay men to wasted and frail shells of their former selves.

To combat this image of weakness in an otherwise proud and in-yourface community, gay men started to focus more on their physical fitness.

Surely that handsome bloke in the bar can’t have HIV or AIDS if his every muscle has been pumped to perfection. Like many trends, this one shifted from its roots as it became deeply embedded in the soil of the gay community.

Nowadays, it’s not enough that you have chiseled abs if you hope to attract another guy’s attention; you also need to play/watch sports, grow a beard, not mind getting dirty (outside of the bedroom, that is), and engage in other traditionally masculine activities and aesthetics.

You essentially need to embody the definition of a “bro.”

Bear in mind that I’m not saying every gay guy desires a perfectly balanced version of the Brawny Man spliced with a frat boy. But I am saying that toxic masculinity has infected the gay community, and there doesn’t seem to be an effective vaccine.

NO GYM, ALL FEMME Gay men who are more feminine — and those like myself who aren’t overtly butch — may feel the need to change themselves into roid ragers in order to stand a chance of catching a guy’s eye. While we know putting on a mask and enhancing the more desirable facets of our personality while stifling others can lead to an identity crisis, it seems as if doing so is the only way to get a guy to swipe right.

It’d be hypocritical for me to say that I don’t care how masculine or feminine a guy is. I will say I prefer guys who are authentic and don’t seem to go out of their way to be too this or too that. In fact, I once dated a guy who was definitely more feminine, but he treated me better than most of the more masculine guys I dated.

Rather than say guys who are more in touch with their feminine side have a greater capacity for caring compared to more butch gay men, I’ll instead say that guys who aren’t caught up in presenting themselves a certain way are able to truly be at ease, be at peace with themselves. When you aren’t worried about how masculine or feminine you look/sound to other people, you’re able to devote more of your mental energy to connecting with other people on a deeper level. That level and that connection are underneath the gym memberships, beard oil, jocks, and flat-brimmed baseball caps. That level is not masculine or feminine, but both and neither.

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T N U R G NO K R WO . SMITH M N I V E K

O N R E F F O S R E T N S E R C E B S S M E E FITN ENT FOR M JUDGMG STARTED GETTIN

Y

ou’re standing there, looking in the mirror, trying to figure out what a “curl” is and how it will help you when you hear it: the grunt.

HURRRRNGH! A guy with veins popping out of his neck is swinging weights larger than your head.

But multiple fitness centers in Denver boast a welcoming atmosphere. The motto at Planet Fitness tells us it’s a “Judgment Free Zone.”

“We don’t cater to bodybuilders or powerlifters; we really gear toward general fitness,” explains Kristi Jost, who owns two of the eight Planet Fitness franchises in the Denver metro.

HURRRRNGH! What is he doing?

HURRRRNGH! You can’t be doing it right if your veins aren’t popping and you’re not grunting. And look at your puny arms. You shouldn’t have even come to the gym.

HURRRRNGH!

NOVEMBER 16, 2016

NO MEATHEADS

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Going to the gym can be intimidating. Maybe you’ve never been or maybe it’s been a long time — either way it can be difficult to navigate through the classes and equipment to find the best workout, all the while worrying about others judging.

The YMCA also supports a welcoming atmosphere.

Both employ personal trainers to help members determine the best workouts given their abilities and goals.

GETTING STARTED “That’s really a question that everybody has when they join a gym: What do I do? How do I go about getting to the goals that I want to get?” says Matt Flick, member experience director at the Littleton YMCA. Matt, who has a degree in sports medicine and is a certified personal trainer, says each YMCA branch in

Colorado has an orientation program to acquaint new members with facilities, services, and equipment.

“When people join, they automatically get access to this program that will pair them up with a nationally certified personal trainer that will meet with them, sit down with them, and talk about medical history and exercise history — basically why they’re here and what they want to be doing then point them in the right direction from there,” Matt says. He said the will give members a cardio and strength plan, as well as suggest classes.

“I really encourage people to take advantage of the trainers we have at each of the branches,” says Matt.

Planet Fitness offers the same option with a designyour-own-program class and a personal trainer. “[It’s] really beneficial for first-time gym users because

he sits down with them, talks about their fitness goals, and writes a detailed, specific program specifically for them,” Kristi explains.

There are other classes throughout the day that focus on different things like arms or legs.

POPULAR FOR MEN Included in memberships at Planet Fitness and the YMCA is access to many classes for free. “What we see for the most part, the cardio and strength classes are usually the main goal for men,” Matt says.

WELCOMING ENVIRONMENT “Because we do that judgment-free zone, we do closely monitor the type of behavior that’s out on the floor,” Kristi explains. “We don’t condone the bodybuilder — stereotypical of what you think of a gym. We have on the wall … our [lunk] alarm.

You’re not supposed to be slamming down weights. If

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She said that is to foster a welcoming environment.

“If you’re a first-time gym user and you’re on a machine and you’re watching somebody who seems to know what they’re doing, they’re slamming weights and they’re grunting — it’s just an uncomfortable feeling and that’s what we’re trying to prevent.”

And that’s important for her clientele.

“Most of our members are firsttime gym users,” Kristi says.

“So because of that, we try to create that non-intimidating atmosphere.”

doesn’t mean men aren’t welcome — from Zumba to yoga.

“There is a community feeling here; people feel a little safer to try some of those things,” Cori says.

Matt concurs.

“The Y really prides itself on being a community-based gym where there’s no judgment, there’s no classification that if you are a male entering a gym you have

Every office is different; every client special.

to go to these classes and do these exercises,” Matt says. “And that’s the beauty of the Y — you can do whatever you want and feel comfortable doing it.”

Kristi notes a community environment. As members get

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into a routine they often see the same people each time they go

Cori Streetman, a spokesperson for the Denver-area YMCAs, notes the welcoming atmosphere.

and build friendships.

“The Y is all about encouraging people to try,” Cori says.

the treadmills together chit-

She says just because a class at the Y has a majority of women

says. “It’s just great to see that

“You’ll see them at some locations. They’ll all line up on chatting as they go,” Kristi community that they build.”

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someone is doing it excessively we’ll sound the alarm. We have no problem going up and talking to someone specifically that may be intimidating.”

THE

G AY PA M P H L E T MIKE YOST

I’ve been informed on more than one occasion that I don’t act “gay” enough. Sometimes this hackneyed observation is made by other gay men, and my usual reply is, “Well, I never got the gay pamphlet in the mail.”

Did you receive yours? I’m told gay men receive said document through USPS-certified mail around the same time your balls drop, but I never got mine. Maybe my parents threw it away, afraid I would be recruited to the gay agenda.

Anyway, I’m told this 66-page pamphlet for homosexual males features full-page photographs of

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NOV E MBER 16, 2 0 16

famous gay actors wearing the latest name-brand fashions I’m supposed to wear, along with complicated pie charts and bar graphs outlining how to act like a proper queen in various social situations. There’s even a pop-out section with instructions on how to give a fabulous gay blowjob.

(Master your gag reflex and cup your teeth!)

And for some reason, this pamphlet dictates that gay men should display more “feminine” characteristics that I often don’t adhere to. Correction: that most gay men I know don’t adhere to.

If you have your gay pamphlet with you, please turn with me to page 12. As you can see, gay men are required to dress in more feminine

colors (a lovely pink pastel Polo shirt, for example) while straight men are required to wear more masculine colors (a blue t-shirt, torn and covered in axle grease, for example).

Again, I always thought I was gay because I enjoy gay sex. Thing is, I drive a truck — just like a “straight” guy! All these years playing with penises, yet I should have been playing with boobs.

I know what you’re thinking: It’s silly to assign clothes as feminine or masculine, as gender binaries are largely the product of dynamic social constructs created and fostered by various cultural paradigms which constantly shift and evolve from generation to generation.

But I digress.

But I digress.

Now turn to page 33. You’ll see that gay men are required to drive a Mini Cooper or a Neon while straight men are required to drive pickups (domestic only) or a Dodge Charger. I’ve been told the pamphlet for our sisters requires that lesbians drive a Subaru Outback or Forester (fully loaded, of course).

Page 52 dictates that when in public, gay men can only admit to listening to Adele, Madonna, or any song relating to a Broadway musical.

If you’re bisexual, you can listen to almost band you want, except Nickelback. Page 53 clearly states that if you listen to Nickelback, you’re not even human, let alone a gay male.

When I was a kid living at home, I was often criticized for not acting “Christian” enough, usually because of the way I dressed or the music I listened to. Now that I’m out of the closet, I’m sometimes criticized for not being “gay”

enough, usually because of the way I dress or the music I listen to.

And this is not an isolated incident within our community.

I say burn the gay pamphlet.

Hell, I say burn this article! In a word, be genuine. Maybe you love Nickelback! Then go on and blast that sh*tty music as you drive down the highway.

No one’s sexual orientation is defined by their clothes or the music they enjoy.

Don’t let gays tell you how to be gay, even if you’re a gay man who gives blowjobs in the back of a domestic pickup without cupping your teeth — that just means you need more blowjob practice.

I recommend Cheesman Park.

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INSIDE THE COVER SHOOT Model Topher LaFleur takes his bike for a ride in the sun-dappled Highlands.

NOVEMBER 16, 2016

Photography by Molly McCormmick.

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LAING AMELIA

E H W T S R E G N DA RTY A P “ OF AY” L P AND

hile it’s difficult to know exactly what percentage of gay men use what drugs, Development Director of the Harm Reduction Action Center (HRAC) Preston Murray says, “Most of the gay male participants at HRAC use meth.”

Murray, a 32-year-old gay man, loves his work with HRAC, a nonprofit dedicated to preventing the transmission of HIV and hepatitis C by providing education and sterile supplies to people who inject drugs.

HRAC also provides naloxone, which reverses an opiate overdose.

HE T D N A , ETH STIGMA M , N E GAY M G POWER OF STAYIN

The International AIDS Society — USA said use of methamphetamines, also known as “meth,” “Tina,” and “T,” is five to 10 times more common in urban gay and bisexual men than in the general population.

The prevalence of meth in the gay community has LGBTIQ advocates worried, and Grindr has been facing increasing scrutiny for allegedly facilitating the sale of the drug.

“While this is not the case for all, many gay men get involved in using meth within the party-andplay scene,” Murray says.

NOVEMBER 16, 2016

John, a gay man and HRAC client, was introduced to meth 15 years ago. “A friend gave it to me and said, ‘Try this,’ so I did,” he says.

Today, John is 44 and homeless. He comes to HRAC because, “it gives me a place that is safe, and it gives me the facts I need to stay safe.”

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PHOTO // RYAN MCGUIRE

Sarah Axelrath, a medical student interested in internal medicine and primary care, regularly volunteers with HRAC. She believes gay men who use face a “double-stigma: If you have sex with men (especially more than one, or without condoms), you are ‘risky.’ If you use drugs, you’re also ‘non-compliant.’

These are stigmatizing terms the healthcare system uses against patients who make choices that it disagrees with, with the effect of driving away from doctors’ offices

patients who are most likely to benefit from access to healthcare.”

Axelrath’s comments highlight healthcare’s checkered past with LGBT communities, from the late removal of homosexuality as a mental disorder from the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders in 1973 to the cruel way people living with HIV and AIDS were treated during the epidemic.

HRAC is emblematic of efforts to help bridge the resulting gap between marginalized people and the healthcare community, providing people who use a nonjudgmental space where they can learn how to reduce their risk of contracting disease and connect to resources in the community.

HRAC meets people where they are, not where society thinks they should be. Many consider this attitude to be more helpful to people who use than traditional “abstinence only” approaches.

Murray recommends that gay men who use drugs or who have unprotected sex, no matter how infrequently, come to HRAC for free supplies and education. “If you don’t use condoms and you sometimes share needles, you are at a high enough risk point that you should consider PrEP and syringe-access services,” he says. “Keep in mind that if your risk factors change, you can stop taking PrEP. No syringeaccess program mandates you to come more than once.”

“I hope more people will understand the struggles we face,” John says. “And I hope more of the gay community helps out where they can.”

Harm Reduction Action Center is located at 231 E. Colfax Ave. They are open Monday through Friday, from 9am–noon and offer free safer shooting supplies, vein care, overdose prevention training, referrals for PrEP, and classes on how to prevent HIV and Hepatitis C.

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TO O D N CA G N E M WHAT DOWN AGIN SLOW

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S

kincare and facial rejuvenation are gaining popularity and attracted widespread attention in overall health-maintenance regimens for men. More men are looking for non-invasive treatments to keep their skin looking young and refreshed without looking plastic or overdone. With ageism in the workplace and social media’s presence in our personal and professional lives, maintaining a youthful appearance is more important than ever. But finding the right dermatologist who’s willing to customize a realistic treatment plan and has the experience and certifications is essential.

“Skin rejuvenation in men’s skin requires subtle techniques for the most natural-looking results,” says Amber Long, PA-C of the Asarch Center for Dermatology, Laser and Mohs Surgery. “One of the most popular treatments is Botox, a common neuromuscular inhibitor which we use to treat lines in the forehead as well as the crow’s feet area in order to reduce — rather than eliminate creases — which also maintains movement and expression.”

Fillers such as Juvederm and Voluma are used to soften lines and correct volume loss that occurs in our faces over time, usually beginning in our late 30s or early 40s. “Results can be achieved without creating a stretched or “puffy” look if your doctor is a trained and certified Master Injector,” states Dr. Richard Asarch. “We also use new fractional lasers and Intense Pulsed Light (IPL) to refresh skin by softening fine lines, reducing brown spots, and removing top layers of damaged skin — often with little or no downtime.”

“Many of my male patients are extremely self-conscious about their receding hairlines, and have a hard time even discussing treatment options. I began doing hair transplants over 25 years ago,

and recently implemented a new, minimally invasive hair restoration technique which uses tiny micrografts to make hair thicker and fuller with a more organic outcome than traditional hair transplants,” Dr. Asarch explains.

Regular use of premium at-home skincare products has been proven to improve skin quality and texture over time and continued use. It is important to use a product line which incorporates a high concentration of the right ingredients in order to be effective.

Not all skincare is created equal.

When asked about DermaSpa Rx Skin Nutrition, Amber Long PA-C states, “Dr. Asarch developed a luxurious skincare line, specifically formulated to combat the ravaging effects of the Colorado climate on our skin. In order to achieve the best results, work with your dermatologist to determine the right products for your skin type, and be sure to wear a daily sunscreen.” Consistent use helps maintain skin health, clear acne flare-ups, reduce brown spots and redness, and enhance the improvement of in-office procedures.

“Remember to include a full skin check in your yearly wellness plans.

As skin cancer rates continue to increase, early detection and treatment become even more crucial,” says Long. Colorado has one of the highest rates of melanoma in the country. Dr. Asarch, one of Colorado’s top Mohs Surgeons, adds that “Melanoma typically gives no symptoms in early stages and can only be detected by visual inspection of the skin. We understand the importance of early diagnosis of melanoma and skin cancer, as one in seven patients with melanoma will die from the disease.” Schedule your exam today.

Reference www.AsarchCenter.com or www.DermaSpaRx.com for more information or email questions to info@AsarchCenter.com

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36 | NOVEMBER 16, 2016

I

f you’ve got a three-day weekend and are ready for a change of scenery, Zion National Park is the way to go. This park in southwest Utah can be for the mild to wild vacationer.

Zion is about a nine-hour drive via I-70 and I-15, so it’s easily achievable in a day.

Unlike national parks like Rocky Mountain and Yosemite, exploring most of the park is feasible without spending as much time driving as you are hiking or exploring.

To access the majority of trailhead, you park at the visitor’s center by the entrance and take a shuttle. Shuttles come by stops about every five minutes and it takes about 40 minutes to ride from the visitor’s center to the final stop.

Each shuttle stop has restrooms.

There are 13 trails rated easy to moderate ranging from just less than a half mile to five miles. For example, the Lower Emerald Pool Trail is the fourth stop on the shuttle and just a 1.2mile loop. The five strenuous hikes range from 2.4 miles to 14 miles. The trails range from gentle to adventurous.

Riverside Walk is a paved 2.2mile out-and-back trail. It ends at the Narrows — a trail that involves wading in water from ankle to knee deep through the canyon. Many people stop to splash around before heading back on the trail if they’re not traversing the Narrows.

If you decide you want go on the Narrows, it’s important to be prepared. First, rent shoes from the visitor’s center. It’s worth to have dry socks and the water gets really cold, so you’ll be able to go farther and more comfortably. Second, make sure you have a waterproof case for your phone. You’re walking through water, after all, and there are slippery rocks below your feet. Tread carefully; a slip and fall is a possibility. My recommendation for the Narrows is to do it last.

Remember, you’re in the Utah desert so after a day of hiking when the heat is pounding down, it’s a good time to wade through water in the shade of the canyon.

Another good hike for the adventurous is Angel’s Landing.

You start on the West Rim Trail and go about 2.5 miles to Scout’s

PHOTOS // KEVIN M. SMITH

Lookout. From the lookout you can see the top of Angel’s Landing. There are chains to guide and steady you, but this hike is not for the faint of heart.

There are steep inclines and some sections less than three feet wide with a 1000-foot drop on both sides. There are chains on either side of this section. The best time for this trail is early. It gets crowded after 10am and the last thing you want is someone elbowing past you on a narrow section or having to navigate past the steady stream of oncoming people when you’ve decided you’ve had enough.

Your options for lodging are many. There’s a lodge within the park and camping adjacent to the visitor’s center. There are also electric and tent-only campsites roughly a quarter mile from the visitor’s center and shuttle pickup ranging $20 to $30 per night. There are many bed-and-breakfast options in small towns like Rockville and Springdale along the way. Hurricane is the nearest sizable town with many hotel options — even St. George isn’t too far. There’s free camping on a remote, rugged road if you turn on Bridge Road in Rockville, then turn onto 250 South until you get to Smithsonian Butte Road. This place was busy on a weeknight, so get there early unless you’re brave enough to take your fourwheel drive up a hill my Ford Escape couldn’t do.

Like all national parks, there’s a $30-per-vehicle entrance fee. A yearlong multi-park pass is $80, which is your best deal if you plan to visit Rocky Mountain National Park multiple times upon your return to the Denver area, or have plans for any other parks within a year.

As a bonus, the Grand Canyon is about a 2.5-hour drive from Zion if you have time and want to take a jaunt down for a few hours.

NPS.gov/Zion

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38 | NOVEMBER 16, 2016

I

poked my head out of the tent and gazed at Loch Doon (Lake Doon), the body of water sunk comfortably into rolling, shallow hills. A thick layer of grey clouds cloaked the sky as diffused sunlight illuminated groves of evergreen trees.

I crawled out of the tent, stretching out my arms while arching my back. In the distance, I could see the remains of Loch Doon Castle, constructed in the late 13th century — purportedly by the legendary rebellious badass himself, Robert the Bruce. My eyes closed as I took in a deep breath, allowing the fresh air to cool my throat. It truly felt like I was inside surrealist painting, camping along the shore of a lake in Scotland.

We all know traveling abroad can leave your checking account bleeding and unconscious on the floor. One way to abate the hemorrhaging (somewhat) is to camp, and there’s no place better place to camp than the north end of Great Britain.

“It’s Scotland,” as one local told me, standing next to his tent and

motorcycle. “Just find a patch of grass and pitch your tent.”

You can camp almost anywhere, with only a few common-sense guidelines issued by the Scottish government. And if you’ve camped even once in Colorado, you’re already familiar with the rules: Pick up your rubbish.

Don’t cut down or damage surrounding trees for campfires Leave no trace you were there.

Essentially, don’t be an asshat.

There’s some planning involved.

My friend and I brought with us a lightweight tent with a rainfly, along with rain gear and coldweather sleeping bags. And my friend bought a stove that burns petrol instead of propane, making it easy to refuel at any gas station.

We saved money by renting a vehicle, essentially a mobile hotel room. The only caveat was training my brain to drive on the left side of the road. It’s an odd experience navigating a two-lane carriageway on the “wrong” side, watching cars approach and pass us on the right. And I made things a bit harder on myself by renting a

standard, forcing myself to shift gears with my left hand while almost burning out the clutch.

Charge your devices and have backup power.

Donʼt become stranded!

PHOTOS // ALES KRIVEC / DENYS NEVOZHAI

But we made it out of Edinburg and camped in Galloway Forest Park. The area is one of only four dark sky parks in the western world for stargazing (when it’s not cloudy), and it’s the only dark sky park in the United Kingdom.

After we set up our tent, we drove our mobile hotel to the Scottish Dark Sky Observatory.

There I had the opportunity to gaze through a telescope the jewel of our solar system, Saturn, with its signature rings burning bright against the black void of space.

The whole observatory seemed to shake as the telescoped moved to reveal the Ring Nebula and then the Hercules Cluster, the latter floating 500 million light years from Earth.

And that was just the first night of camping.

If youʼre traveling to a cold destination, pack a pair of boots — not extra shoes.

Pack only 50% of what you think youʼll use for space for souvenirs.

Plus, stick to basics you can pair with each other.

We later drove to the coast and dropped our tent wherever there was a patch of grass (while avoiding the copious piles of sheep sh*t), bathed in nearby streams (with Earth-friendly soaps of course), and ate canned beans next to a warm campfire near the crumbling walls of a medieval castle.

So, if you want to step into a surrealist painting, stare at the pantheon of stars that populate our Milky Way Galaxy, and you don’t mind the midges (Scottish mosquitos), I recommend packing your camping gear and heading to Scotland.

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40 | NOVEMBER 16, 2016

Y

ou know what’s pointy and intimidating?

A bunch of upsidedown thumbtacks.

Also glaciers. I hadn’t realized they still existed (glaciers); like dodo birds and cassette tapes I thought they were gone, victims of a changing world.

Yet there I was, standing on a metal catwalk just a few feet away from Perito Moreno, a 92-square-mile glacier in southern Patagonia.

El Calafate is a cozy ski town, a hub of adventure tourism in the region. But when we had arrived very late the previous night, I could see only what the jet’s powerful lights picked up: an empty and arid plane covered in tufted grass and dusted in snow. It felt like landing on the moon, like the people within the plane’s lighted cabin were the only ones left out there. I looked over at my brother in the seat next to me. What had we gotten ourselves into this time?

We hadn’t had a chance to see the town or much of the scenery on the way to the glacier that first morning — an 8am wake up in August on the southern tip of South America means

you’re up before the sun. Perito Moreno was regal and aloof. But the scenery driving back to El Calafate was also striking. An immense grassland interrupted by mountains. Kind of like Colorado, actually. But emptier.

And vast. Talk about that bigsky, open-road feeling.

With its kitschy souvenir shops and packs of stray dogs, El Calafate would serve as our homebase for a few days as we explored the area, and then it was time to head south.

We were going to Ushuaia, the southernmost city IN THE WORLD. Flying low over the last of the Andes was like zipping through the peaks of a lemon meringue. Ushuaia is located on the biggest island of Tierra del Fuego, the archipelago at the very end of South America that looks, on a map, like an x-ray of a tail bone. This was no cake-walk of a place.

This is where the Strait of Magellan and Cape Horn, those infamous shipkillers, lie. It’s the subantarctic region, only a hop, skip, and a very cold jump from the white continent herself.

Ushuaia was charming. Steep white mountains staggered

PHOTOS // LUCA GALUZZI

HOT AIR BALLOON RIDE

over a crystal blue harbor, tugboats and cargo ships sitting at the docks. I couldn’t help but imagine that the breeze on my face had recently ruffled a few penguin feathers. We were only about 650 miles from the edge of Antarctica.

It turns out that my midwestern self is dazzled by the poles.

Picturing unsurvivable waves crashing into Cape Horn makes the Earth feel wild and celestial, like the giant alien it is.

Ushuaia August sunrises are late and lingering, painting the world in creamy pinks and yellows and purples for an hour or more. On what was to be our last morning in Patagonia, we took a boat into the Beagle Channel. Even as the colors faded, the sky was still a gauzy blue. The sea echoed the sky, so it felt like we weren’t on the water and under the clouds but splitting through some other thing altogether. We saw cormorants — which I called penguins just to annoy my brother — whose feet kicked at the water like the landing gear of a plane. We saw a colony of sea lions lounging fat and confident, so thick on their island that it looked like they grew there. We saw a lighthouse on an island all its own. This would be our high-water mark, the farthest south we would go. When it was time to turn around, a thick fog rolled in. The sun, visible only

as a spot of lighter fog, was low on the horizon even though it was 1pm; it hadn’t ever fully risen. Alone above deck, I was just starting to think that we were lost forever, letting my mind wander to stories of shipwrecks and cannibalism, when two huge ships began to emerge from the haze. They were cargo ships, moored in the harbor. We had seen them on our way out, and now they signaled our return. The whole city, I realized, was stretched out maybe 500 feet in front of me.

Later that afternoon, we were packed and ready to go when we learned that our flight had been cancelled due to a cloud hanging low over the city. Although I was ready to leave the subantarctic winter, part of me was thrilled at this particular travel hiccup: another reminder of nature’s raw power.

And then the next day, it really was time to go. Out of the winter, through spring-like weather in Buenos Aires, and then finally back to the American summer.

By the time we left Patagonia, my apprehension about the place, images of an empty and blowing tundra, had turned into a fond appreciation for its beauty and a deep respect for its rough edges. And maybe, if I’m lucky, Ushuaia won’t be the farthest south I’ll ever go, after all.

DOG SLEDDING HOT SPRINGS

ENJOY THE SIGHTS

NIGHT SKIING

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42 | NOVEMBER 16, 2016

T

he trouble with big national parks like Rocky Mountain, Yellowstone, and Yosemite is it’s so difficult to figure out what to do because there’s just so much.

There’s also a lot of driving.

Like ... a lot. But the vistas and experiences are worth it.

The trailhead to the Upper Yosemite Falls can be found near the lower falls. This 3.6mile hike is rated “strenuous.”

Depending on what you want to accomplish, Yosemite National Park takes some planning.

However, whatever you end up seeing and doing are breathtaking moments.

Half Dome can be seen from Glacier Point and parking areas along the way. For those wanting a dome experience, but don’t have the gumption to climb the cable ladders, stop at Centennial Dome on the road to Glacier Point. The hike from the trailhead to Centennial Dome is just a little more than a mile and not too strenuous a climb (especially for Coloradans).

Keep going on that trail to check out the fissures and overlook at Taft Point to loop back to the parking lot and complete your hike in less than three miles.

FOR THE TAME The falls are among the signature attractions at Yosemite National Park. From Yosemite Lodge, where there’s ample parking if you arrive early and shuttle buses to other park features, there is a short, paved trail for the Yosemite Lower Falls.

It’s important to note that the falls vary by season. Spring is the best time to view them as the snow is melting off the mountain. There was but a trickle during my visit in early October. Though it’s often a just a light spray during the winter, it freezes to provide a different type of show.

Other falls can be seen by simply parking in designated areas just outside the tunnel in the valley and from an overlook near Glacier Point.

FOR THE ADVENTUROUS Half Dome is one of the iconic hikes of Yosemite, though it’s not for everyone. To summit Half Dome, aptly named as one side is curved like the many dome-shaped peaks in Yosemite

PHOTOS // KEVIN M. SMITH

while the other side is a straight drop off, hikers must climb a set of cable ladders. This requires a permit applied for online a day in advance. When there are more applicants than permits available daily, hikers get entered in a lottery.

Yosemite offers many short, moderate hikes, along with more challenging trails like the 12.6-mile, 2200-foot elevation gain journey for Ten Lakes.

PLAN AHEAD It’s important to note that many areas in Yosemite shut down for the season starting in early to mid-October. Several campgrounds close, roads close, and the cables are removed from the Half Dome before Oct. 15. Checking to make sure features you want to see are accessible is important before making the trek to California.

For those who prefer to drive, it can be done in two long days on the road.

BEYOND THE PARK The small town of Oakhurst, just southwest of the park’s entrance on State Highway 41, has many amenities like restaurants, shopping, and lodging (including an ice cream shop with a homemade non-dairy option). Another 45 minute drive from Oakhurst puts in you Fresno, which is the ideal location to fly into for your visit.

NPS.gov/Yose

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CALENDAR As you read this issue, you’ll be enjoying Thanksgiving dinner … which means the Christmas season is just around the corner! There are a few fun holiday-themed events in this calendar, in addition to the concerts and plays you’ve been waiting for months to arrive in the Centennial State. Remember, you can recommend events to me directly! Email me at j.m.halterman@gmail. com, or Tweet at me @ Mike_Halterman!

Mike Halterman

NOV 18

WYNONNA AND THE BIG NOISE She’s sassy, she’s brassy, she’s the inimitable Wynonna Judd. She recently released an album with her band, The Big Noise, and she’ll be bringing them along to her Colorado concert to promote the album. You’ll hear some of her newest material and also some of the songs you’ve loved for years — like the multi-platinum No One Else on Earth. Wynonna and The Big Noise will perform on Friday, November 18 at 7:30pm at the Parker Arts, Culture and Events Center in Parker. $70-$75 ParkerArts.org

NOV 18

NOV 18DEC 23

ANTHONY BOURDAIN Anthony Bourdain has traversed the globe, met lots of interesting people, and most importantly, sampled some of the world’s best dishes. He will tell you all about those, plus some of the more interesting anecdotes he has compiled while logging frequent flyer miles between hemispheres, when he arrives in Colorado for his The Hunger 2016 North American Tour. He will take the stage at Bellco Theatre on Nov. 18 at 8pm. Tickets start at $60.50 BellcoTheatre.com

DREAMGIRLS

FRIDAYS

DENVER’S LONGEST-RUNNING DRAG CABARET Jackie Summers, host and face of Dreamgirls, has a juicy, meaty night of drag entertaintment tucked away for y’all! Every Friday at 10pm, M Uptown features the best that Denver’s drag scene has to offer. Reservations are important so call beforehand for a seat! M-Uptown.com

4 4 \\ N O V E M B E R 1 6 , 2 0 1 6

CHRISTKINDL MARKET The Denver Christkindl Market, now in its 16th year, is finally here! Hosted by the GermanAmerican Chamber of Commerce – Colorado, it begins on Friday, November 18 and will run through Friday, December 23. Skyline Park on the 16th Street Mall will be turned into an “old world” European Christmas village, complete with a holiday market, a beer hall, holiday entertainment acts, and cultural performances. OUT FRONT is a proud sponsor of the Denver Christkindl Market. To learn more, visit DenverChristkindlMarket.com.

THRU DECEMBER

DENVER GAY MEN’S CHORUS

HUDSON CHRISTMAS A Hudson Christmas is the premier holiday light display in the Denver metro area, and the 2016 display will be opening for business on Friday, November 25 at The Hudson Gardens & Event Center in Littleton.

Walk down the winding path and view all the beautiful lights and sounds as you get into the Christmas mood. Take a picture on Santa’s sleigh while you’re there too! You can be a part of all the magic Fridays, Saturdays, and Sundays through to the end of December, from 5 to 8pm each night. Tickets are $9 for adults and $7 for Hudson Gardens members; visit AltitudeTickets.com to purchase.

NOV 28

DEC 01-03

The Denver Gay Men’s Chorus kicks off its 35th anniversary season with Merry and Gay: A Denver Gay Men’s Chorus Holiday Spectacular! You can see the show either in the evenings (7:30pm) or matinee (3pm) from Thursday, December 1 to Saturday, December 3 at Central Presbyterian Church (1660 N. Sherman St., Denver). In this show, the elves rebel against Santa because he won’t let them listen to showtunes while they work!

Tickets range from $25-$50; buy them in advance at CentralDenver.com.

DEC 06-11

HEDWIG AND THE ANGRY INCH Millions of people worldwide have been mesmerized by Hedwig and the Angry Inch, the musical sensation which breaks the fourth wall and showers the audience with a pulsating soundtrack and uniquely dramatic performances. Denver audiences will get to see the show as it arrives at The Buell Theatre at the Denver Performing Arts Complex on Tuesday, December 6. The show runs through Sunday, December 11, with matinees running on weekends. Tickets start at $30; go to DenverCenter. org for more information.

KANYE WEST Kanye West is currently on his Saint Pablo worldwide tour, and he will be making one of his next tour stops at the Pepsi Center on Monday, November 28 at 9pm. The ultimate artiste, Kanye pledges to give Denver audiences a show they won’t soon forget! Who knows...we may get to see his wife Kim Kardashian there too! General admission tickets start at $29.50 per person, floor tickets start at $129.50, and VIP tickets are priced at $375. You can buy any of these tickets online at AltitudeTickets.com.

DEC 01

BENEFIT AVALANCHE GAME If you’re a fan of The Colorado Symphony, here’s how you can give back, take in a fun hockey game, and be surrounded by great Symphony supporters all at once! On Thursday, December 1 at 7pm, the Colorado Avalanche will take on the Columbus Blue Jackets at the Pepsi Center. Tickets start at $28, and $5 from every purchase will be donated directly to The Colorado Symphony! To ensure you buy the tickets which will benefit the Symphony, buy online at AVSTix.com/ColoradoSymphony16.

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46 | NOVEMBER 16, 2016

kindest in the world. In the 80s, the curator of the Lenin museum was called in to personally meet the American claiming to be a communist (yes, that would be me in my youth). I was showered with gifts of Lenin pins and hammer-and-sickle keychains.

When I first arrived, I was taken off the train in the middle of the night by armed soldiers because I lost my visa. Heart pounding, hands quivering, I was ushered into a small, concrete building.

Imagine my relief when I saw the inside was painted with peace signs and white doves. The guard who spent an entire night fixing my visa personally drove me to the city in his teeny, tiny car. He didn’t speak English, but animatedly yelled the names of famous Czechoslovakian tennis players as we passed grass-covered courts.

I

foresee a city whose fame touches the stars!”

Bohemian Duchess Libuše said in the 12th century, just before her kingdom began work on what is now one of the most beautiful cities in the world.

Known as the “City of a Hundred Spires,” Prague combines Medieval, Gothic, Renaissance, and Baroque architecture. Narrow lanes of humble, broken-cobblestone streets hold the majestic Prague Castle that has been home to royal, religious, communist, and democratic leaders.

Bisected by the Vltava River, the city is cut in half. Lesser Town sits on the left bank. Here, you’ll find the castle and some of the most beautiful Baroque churches in the world. The right bank is home to Old Town and the Jewish Quarter.

Connecting it all: the massive 15thcentury stone Charles Bridge.

Draped with ancient statues, towers on either side provide tourists an opportunity to see the city from above.

For centuries, members of the upper classes have walked these streets side-by-side with some of the nation’s poorest citizens.

It’s a city steeped in history, in conflict, and in peace.

I’ve had the pleasure of visiting both the Communist-controlled Prague and the democratic one.

I can say it is far, far more easy to travel there today. Many people now speak English.

Hotels, hostels, and cafes are open to everyone. And taxis are now available. That may not seem like big deal, but get lost in a city with street signs that each contain upwards of 10 connecting consonants and no one — no one — who speaks English.

I first visited the Czech Republic’s capital in the 80s when it was still Czechoslovakia. Traveling alone meant I had to stay in a government-run apartment, check in daily at the police station, and ride the city trolleybus that I thought was free until one day a member of the communist party stood up and began lecturing me in Czech (one of the most difficult languages for an English speaker to understand). Back then, members of the party were everywhere, dressed as civilians, making sure rules were followed. Apparently, I was supposed to put money into a cup on the unmanned trolleybus.

(I thought it was a tip jar).

One thing remains the same: The people are among the

This generous spirit remains, even as foreigners pounce on the city — opening English speaking newspapers, businesses, and cafes.

There are now designer fashion shows in a city that once dressed 20 years behind the times. Bars are now open all night (I don’t know what Russia had against late drinkers). What hasn’t changed is the intimacy and personal service found inside these small pubs carved into ancient stone structures. You’ll also find English menus now.

In the 80s, I had to guess and point. One night I ended up with a raw egg on top of a raw steak. Not eating in a country with so little food is insulting. I’m afraid I probably insulted someone that night.

Most historic sites are open to tourists. Churches and some historic landmarks are free. You can also catch an opera, ballet, or concert at one of the many beautiful venues. My favorite activity is grabbing a kielbasa from one of the sausage stands and meandering through the streets.

Getting around is easy. The subway, buses, and trams are conveniently located. The city itself is also very walkable. A word of warning, though, about those convenient taxis I mentioned earlier: Only take official cabs with a yellow roof lamp permanently installed. Private taxi drivers are notoriously shady.

I suggest going during the off season (anytime that is not summer).

The city is becoming more and more crowded as word of its beauty spreads west. It is, after all, a city whose fame touches the sky.

BEER BASH AT BLUSH AND BLU Beer Bash kicked off at Blush and Blu on October 30th. All you can drink Bud Light every Sunday afternoon from 4 pm to 8 pm for only $10. Beer Bash, produced by Karl Wesley, features Bella CoutureLaCher, Anka Shayne, DJ Stone Cox, DJ Take Two, and dancers from RU Entertainment.

Photos by Charles Broshous

CHARLIE THE CHUM

Charlie is an adorable dog who’s ready to settle into his new home! He loves to go for walks and does well on the leash. He would do best in a home with plenty of playtime and love!

Come meet him today.

MANITOU

Manitou is a happy dog who enjoys leash walks and spending time with his favorite people! He was housetrained in his previous home and would prefer to be an only pet where he can be the center of attention!

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SPONSORED

THE CHANGING LANDSCAPE OF POT IN COLORADO Joseph Soto MARIJUANA WAS A BIG ISSUE IN the 2016 election across the country, and even though Colorado voters chose to legalize recreational marijuana usage, the landscape of pot in our state continues to evolve. While some readers may think of this as an issue college students have championed, it’s actually an important policy area for every Coloradan to understand. To get a different perspective, I had a conversation with Jake Salazar, the CEO of MMJ America, a business that bills itself as a dispensary but also as advocates for progressive reform of marijuana laws. There’s not room in this magazine for our entire discussion — it ended up lasting three times longer than was scheduled — but what we talked about might just change what you think about the industry.

Jake believes a lot of the stigma is around the federal government’s placement of marijuana into the Schedule I group of substances alongside drugs like heroin. While marijuana had been recognized in the United States for its medicinal properties as far back as 1851 and had been used recreationally and medicinally by everyone from George Washington to Queen Victoria, the stigma around its usage we’ve witnessed has a lot to do with the fact that federal prohibition conformed behavior and opinions.

Though we now know that marijuana prohibition was based heavily on fraudulent junk science pushed by William Randolph Hearst at the behest of his own business interests, marijuana prohibition at the federal level still impacts our ability to have basic scientific knowledge of 4 8 \\ N O V E M B E R 1 6 , 2 0 1 6

marijuana, regardless of how the people are choosing to regulate marijuana at the state level. Jake and I talked about the absurdity of scientists not easily being able to research marijuana, but he pointed out that “this generation is a lot more educated” and that despite a dearth of federally funded scientific research, most people know how the drug will impact them at least.

Statistically, it’s likely some of you reading this have used marijuana recreationally, and if you’re legally using it now in the safety and comfort of your own home, cheers! Apart from recreational usage, though, is a group of people who have moved to states like Colorado to gain access to cannabis in different forms for its medicinal benefits.

These “marijuana refugees,” as they’ve been called by media outlets from The Denver Post to Vice and CNN, as well as the Colorado natives who have been using medical marijuana since after 2000, have put even more pressure on political leaders to enact progressive reforms in the law. Jake believes this will continue to change as people become more educated about marijuana and as governments see the benefits of a regulated marijuana industry to their bottom line as well. In Jake’s words, it’s a “win win.”

Jake told me that his company, MMJ America, is all about social change, and said that being “recognized as a pioneer in social change is something I’d like to pass down to my children.”

Looking at how the reality of marijuana in Colorado has changed over the past few years, I’d say he’s well on his way.

HALLOWEEN AT LIPSTICK A capacity crowd kicked off their Halloween holiday at the Grand Madrid Halloween Party at Lipstick Nightclub on October 28th. The festivities, hosted

by Kiera Sexton, Karina Hermosillo, and Diva Colombiana, included free drinks before 11pm, a costume contest, and GoGo dancers from LA. Lipstick is located at 5660 West Colfax Avenue, four blocks west of Sheridan Boulevard.

Photos by Charles Broshous

M A RQUEE THOROUGHLY MODERN MILLY

November 19 through February 25 **%& 6gVeV]dZ 6kZ# 7djaYZg 79IHiV\Z#Xdb

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r e t a t i n n m E e e nt h T

Perhaps because he was one of a crowd at home, young Pierre longed to set himself apart and he loved to “create a show and get a crowd to come out and watch.” He thought of becoming a priest, joining the circus, or somehow performing, so when his mother found a ticket to a wrestling match as a premium with a loaf of bread, Pierre became determined to see that show.

He was right — it was a life-changer.

Pierre fell in love with wrestling and, because he knew someone whose father was a promoter, he began training to be a pro wrestler. He changed his name to Pat Patterson and, at around that time, he also began to understand why “girls just weren’t doing it for me.” He was gay, an ultimate admission that got him kicked out of the family home.

N O V E M B E R 1 6 , 2 0 1 6 \\ 5 2

In Boston — his next home of many — Patterson had to learn English while he worked his way up the pro-wrestling ladder. He became the “bad guy” on the mat, and developed a ring persona. Also in Boston, he was set up with a man who “looked spectacular,” and with whom Patterson fell in love; he brought Louis Dondero into his act and his life for the next many decades, and they traveled the world on behalf of Patterson’s career.

And though their relationship and their sexuality might have seemed out of place in an über-macho industry like pro-wrestling, says Patterson, “Being gay turned out not to be an issue at all.”

ACCEPTED

TERRI SCHLICHENMEYER

So now read ACCEPTED by Pat Patterson (with Bertrand Hebert) and take it to the mat.

Pierre Clermont understood poverty.

Y

ou are the champion of all-time.

Nobody can beat you; nobody can even tie your record. When it comes to thumb-wresting, you know all the moves and you really throw your arm into it for the win. Hands-down, you’re the best.

As one of eleven children plus parents in a two-bedroom apartment in a poor Montreal neighborhood, he was acquainted with lacks of privacy, hot water, and food. He and his younger brother slept in a closet, because there was nowhere else to sleep.

Or was it? Did it have anything to do with the “scandal” to which author Pat Patterson mysteriously alludes? Plenty is said about old friends, old matches, and off-work hijinks but Accepted only bumps into that subject about which fans still argue.

In Accepted, you’ll find a story of an openly gay athlete at a closeted time in history in this book, but there’s a lot to sort through to get there. Non-fans might want to think twice about reading it, but for pro-wrestling followers, Accepted is two thumbs up.

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1336 E 17 th Ave, Denver (303) 993-5812 hamburgermarys.com/denver

B OYZTOWN

LANNIE’S CLOCKTOWER CA BA R E T

B ROA DWAYS 1027 Broadway St, Denver (303) 623-0700 broadwaysdenver.com HAPPY HOUR MON - FRI 2–8p // SAT + SUN 12–8p // 2-4-1 Wells // $4 You-Call-Its // $3 Domestic Mini Pitchers MONDAY SIN NIGHT (Service Industry Night) // Download the [IndiCard] App & recieve happy hour prices All Night // 8p–2a TUESDAY DOLLAR DRINKS $1 wells // $1 Bud Light drafts // 8p–2a WEDNESDAY All Day Happy Hour FRIDAY - 9PM-2AM Weekend Kick-Off Dance Party // 9p–2a SATURDAY WERQ! Hottest Saturday night dance party w/ DJ TakeTwo // $3.50 Smirnoff Cocktails // 9p–2a SUNDAY BEER BASH $10 All-you-can-drink Bud Light & Mimosas // Lacey Fauxx Vanderpump hosts DJs Stone Cox & TakeTwo w/ Sexy GoGos by RuEntertainment // 4–8p

CHARLIE'S ® NIGHTCLUB 900 E. Colfax Ave, Denver (303) 839-8890 charliesdenver.com

M UPTOWN 700 E. 17 th Ave, Denver (303) 832-1333 m-uptown.com MANIC MONDAYS Happy Hour All Day // Karaoke with Allison at 9p TUESDAYS: OUTRAGEOUS DRAG BINGO Hosted by Sasha Andrews & Jackie Summers // Balls drop at 9p // Free to play!

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DO IT WITH A LOC AL (303) 832-1333 M-UPTOWN.COM 700 E. 17 TH AVE. DENVER

(FOR M ERLY HA M BURGER M ARY’S)

TRACKS

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3500 Walnut St, Denver (303) 863-7326 tracksdenver.com

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475 Santa Fe, Denver (720) 627-5905

629 E. Colfax Ave, Denver (303) 832-2687 xbardenver.com

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3430 N. Academy Blvd, Colo. Springs (719) 570-1429 clubqonline.com

1891 14 St #110, Denver (303) 586-4199 cravedenver.com

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5660 W Colfax Ave, Denver (720) 669-3470

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16th St. Mall @ Arapahoe, Denver (303) 293-0075 lannies.com

DOWNING ST.

117 Broadway St, Denver (303) 722-7373 boyztowndenver.com

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What we’re doing to our newborn boys is nothing short of barbaric.

CUTTING THROUGH THE BULLSH*T OF CIRCUMCISION Gregory Wheeler IF YOU’VE GOT AN IRON STOMACH AND A FROZEN HEART, I IMPLORE you to hop on YouTube and have a gander at newborn baby boys being mutilated in the good ol’ American way. If you don’t have the nerve to deal with it, I’ll save you some trauma and describe it here. It goes like this: You take a freshly born little boy and you strap him down into an apparatus that holds his legs apart. It’s called the Circumstraint. (How cute.) There are Velcro cuffs to keep his arms and legs in place so he can’t move while you’re slicing his genitals. Then, you coat his penis in antiseptic. The topical is as much medication as the baby will have during the process and it does nothing at all to alleviate the pain. You can’t sedate babies or give them anesthetics for this procedure — or most others — so he’s literally going to feel every rip, tear, yank, and slice as he’s strapped down to a device in an operating room.

Now, because it’s meant to shield the baby from foreign materials such as fecal matter, the foreskin’s opening is incredibly tiny.

The doctor is going to procure some forceps to place them into the tiny opening and widen it. This rips the baby’s synechia, the bit of skin that’s attached to the head of his penis and the inner lining of his foreskin. This is also where the newborn’s screaming becomes so shrill and heartwrenching, where he screams until his lungs have nothing more to offer so his mouth

becomes stuck in a silent, breathless, crimson-faced gape of anguish. What we’re doing to our newborn boys is nothing short of barbaric.

But we’ve only just begun.

As the blood begins to form around the tip of his penis, a clamp is attached to his newly stretched skin. Then, a slit is cut into the dorsal side of the tender flesh. The skin is peeled back, revealing the raw and bloody glans (head) of the baby’s penis. Once that’s exposed, a tiny bell-shaped cap is placed on the glans, and the foreskin is stretched over that bell. A string goes around the object to secure the skin, the tighter the better, for it will ooze blood and obscure the view of what needs to be sliced off.

The main event begins. Using either a scalpel or tiny scissors, the foreskin is removed, with careful attention to take as much as possible off to prevent accidentally leftover foreskin from rotting. Now it’s time to snap the handle of the bell off, which means the baby will have that circumcision cap until it, along with his necrotic foreskin, falls off — usually within 5–10 days. Circumcision takes roughly a third of the penile skin system including sensitive inner and outer preputial layers, the peripenic dartos muscle, the frenar band, and part of the frenulum.

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But why would secular folks who aren’t using the practice as part of their religion have this procedure done to their kids?

It’s a very good question and still remains a bit of a mystery.

Curiously, the United States is the only country in the world where the majority of its males have been snipped. Seeing as how that’s the case, you’d think we have a clear consensus on why we’re doing this. Not so much.

A bit of rifling through the annals of its history shows that for the non-religious, American circumcision has its roots in masturbation hysteria. The wisdom of that day was touted (apparently for perpetuity) by none of than Dr. John Harvey Kellogg, of Kellogg’s Corn Flakes’ fame. A man of many talents, Kellogg spearheaded the establishment of the American Medical Missionary College, which later morphed into Illinois University. But in the meantime, Dr. Kellogg ran a sanitarium that specialized in holistic healing methods that included exercise and vegetarianism. As an intuitive man of science, he was a skilled surgeon who pioneered the idea of plentiful and healthy gut flora leading to efficient digestive systems.

The belief was so strong, that yogurt enemas were a part of his patients’ routines.

However, as time wore on, the brilliant doctor turned to more religious endeavors, proselytizing inside his medical practice and instilling his morals onto patients. He became obsessed with “onanism,” another word for masturbation. A Seventh-Day Adventist at the turn of the century, sex was a highly regulated affair for people of his faith. Dr. Kellogg was inspired by the teachings of Sylvester Graham (of graham cracker fame, and I’m not even kidding). Graham claimed that eating two meals a day would help stymie the rampant sex drives plaguing the people of their day, so his patients went down to breakfast and dinner with yogurt enemas in between.

applying carbolic acid onto their clitorises, literally blistering then rotting them off. Additionally, Dr. Kellogg suggested the practice of sewing existing foreskins of grown men together with just enough space to allow them to pee, but to cause painful erections. He also recommended a patented cage that went around the genitals and administered an electric shock upon attempts at “self-abuse.” It’s safe to say that though he’d later be best known for his cereal, Dr. Kellogg had an insatiable desire to pump the brakes on … well, desire.

So the mystery remains: Why are we cutting our baby boys? Some say it’s “just tradition.” They want their sons to look like their fathers, who looked like their fathers, who looked like their fathers, and so on. Some say it’s medical, and that it keeps the male parts from becoming infected from having unwashed foreskin. (That, folks, is a terrible reason to cut a baby’s genitals. What if he doesn’t clean his pits and gets some kind of inflamed blockage?

Should we just go on and remove the sweatglands from his baby armpits — just in case?)

Why are we cutting our baby boys? Some say it’s “just tradition.”

They want their sons to look like their fathers, who looked like their fathers, who looked like their fathers, and so on.

That was the easy stuff. Another of Dr. Kellogg’s practices was the cleaving of the foreskin, for it was his remedy for “local uncleanliness” and would deter men from wanton sex and masturbation. We know this today as circumcision and somehow, just haven’t moved on.

The fact of the matter is that unless he suffers from phimosis — in which his penis is literally trapped inside of his foreskin — there’s no medical reason to hack at your baby’s genitals. You’re literally removing millions of concentrated nerves for horrible reasons of “tradition.” Besides, shouldn’t that be something a man gets to decide when he’s old enough to consider it?

But butchering newborn boys’ genitals wasn’t doing the trick for Dr. Kellogg’s time, so he turned to “healing” young girls by

If you’re on the fence, do your own research. I suggest starting with YouTube and letting your heart do the rest.

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OPULENCE AT TRACKS Circuit Saturday at Tracks Nightclub hosted Opulence on November 5th.

Local circuit sisters came out in force, dressed to the nines in lavish garb, gold, and glitter. November’s festivities featured DJs Jordan P and Rico Alexis.

Circuit Saturday is held at Tracks the first Saturday of every month.

Photos by Charles Broshous

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THIS IS YOUR BRAIN ON LYING Kelsey Lindsey WHAT MAKES ONE SMALL LIE SPIN INTO A HUGE, MESSY FALSEHOOD? In what felt like one big subtweet to a certain presidential candidate, researchers recently released the results of a study looking at how the brain adapts to dishonesty.

It all starts with a seemingly harmless fib: rounding up your total sales for the month or forgetting to mention your boyfriend to the cute new guy. According to the study, the part of the brain that responds when you’re lying “gets used to” this dishonesty, responding less and less with each falsity. Over time, this could make us more prone to lying — a slippery slope leading to bigger and bigger untruths.

For the study, researchers took a group of 80 adults to play a little game of “how much?” with a partner in another room.

Looking at a jar of pennies, the participants were told that the same image would be displayed to their partner. The participants’ goal was to help the partners guess the amount of pennies in the jar with advice sent on a computer.

Then, incentives were added. Participants were told that they would get paid more if their partner overestimated the amount of pennies in the jar, which caused dishonesty to increase in over 60 presentations of the jar. The researchers also tailored the scenario to make the lie either benefit both parties, benefit 5 8 \\ N O V E M B E R 1 6 , 2 0 1 6

“This study is the first empirical evidence that dishonest behavior escalates when it’s repeated.”

the partner at the participant’s expense, or benefit both of them without any negative consequences for either person. While participants were more willing hash out the biggest lie when it benefited both parties, scientists found that the self-serving participants’ lies increased over time.

“This study is the first empirical evidence that dishonest behavior escalates when it’s repeated, when all else is held constant,” author Neil Garrett told reporters as reported by Scientific American.

The scientists also used brain scans to monitor brain activity in the participants, focusing on the area in the brain that is associated with emotions — the amygdala. When the participants continued to lie, the response in the amygdala decreased, perhaps becoming desensitized to the guilt.

The study does have some caveats though, as pointed out in a recent New York Times article. The stakes were relatively low for the dishonest persons in the study — no one in the study was going to lose a job or spark outrage with their fibs.

More research is needed, but, according to Garrett, it “highlights the potential dangers of engaging in small acts of dishonesty on a regular basis.”

So, please, tell me: How does this dress really make me look?

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O U T BAC K CLASSIFIEDS Envisioned by Boberto

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DO IT WITH A LOC AL (303) 832-1333 M-UPTOWN.COM 700 E. 17 TH AVE. DENVER

(FOR M ERLY HA M BURGER M ARY’S)

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BAC KWOR DS

ASK A SLUT [WARNING: GRAPHIC]

What are your favorite traits that exude masculinity?

Latexa: A warped sense of humor is the most important thing in anyone I have in my life. For example, I knew my boyfriend was the one when he told me he loved me the first time. He said “You know I love you … but only when you’re f*cking me. The rest of the time, you’re just tolerable.”

Zoey: Anyone who is comfortable with his body and silliness to show it off. (Or anyone who can out-drink me.)

Cookie: Ripped abs and a butt that looks good in chaps.

JackLynn: The penis! The larger and harder, the better!

Kay: The love of Death. Hmm Can it just be Death?

He’s HOT!

Cherri: Chest hair and a treasure trail. One to keep me warm and the other to play with.

Do you think there’s a stigma to being a bottom in our culture?

Latexa: Not so much a stigma, because let’s face

adoration for a heavy bottom that can take a beating with a paddle or flogger.

JackLynn: I like it on top, so cowboy me away!

Who wants to be my horse?

Kay: Are you sure you don’t mean a stigma to being a top? I’m not even sure I know very many tops. Is it bad to be a top?

Cherri: Yes, because let’s face it: Guys are lazy.

It’s better to just lay there and take it than having to work those muscles.

Why do you think drugs and alcohol are so prevalent in our community?

Latexa: Okay, time to be a little serious. Alcohol and drugs are a problem due to loneliness and poor self-worth. I’ve picked up a lot of bar flies and addicts in my day who all seemed shocked that I wanted to talk to them, let alone get in their pants. Also, have you been to a gay bar? They all poor very heavy. I tell straight people that if you want to get smashed cheap, you go to a gay bar.

Zoey: Serious note, we’re treated as less-thans in mainstream culture, so the community has embraced the “live fast, die young” way of life.

it: Getting a good pounding is nice. But the small group of men who are total tops (and I mean small group; there are like five in Denver) look down on it like you’re subservient or femme if you enjoy the backdoor.

Cookie: Most of the time, we hang out at the bar to

Zoey: Yep. We need to start a Bottom Lives Matter protest group.

did much in the way of drugs. Now sex is another matter entirely.

Cookie: Depends on the culture. In kink, there’s

Kay: It helps you escape the mean, cruel world.

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pick up on someone. As the night progresses and you get more desperate, you need more alcohol to make the slim pickings seem better.

JackLynn: I am such a control freak that I never