OUT AFRICA MAGAZINE - ISSUE 50

Issue 50, AUTUMN 2022

AFRICA

MAGAZ I N E

ANNIVERSARY ISSUE CELEBRATE PRIDE 2022

CAPE TOWN OUT & PROUD FESTIVAL 2022 U AT Q E L B ILA A V SA

COM ICKET.

26 RY A U R B FE 022 2

T KE C TI

#TOGETHERAGAIN LIMITED TICKETS AVAILABLE GET YOUR TICKETS AT www.quicket.com

INSIDE THIS ISSUE FEATURES

2 Editor’s Comment 3 Cape Town Pride 2022 4 PRIDE CALENDAR OF EVENTS 6 The 2022 Icon & SAIDA Awards 8 FEATURE: Getting to know Grant J. Peres 12 Pride Proms 2022 19 Guy Candy - Be My Valentine 22 Pride Merchandise - Support Nkoli House 28 TRAVEL: LGBTI+ tourism 30 Pride worldwide 32 FEATURE: Resilience Inspires: Renaldo Schwarp’s “Skeef” 34 Pride IS still relevant 36 A Sad Goodbye 38 Important Numbers 40 Alphen Hotel 42 Buddies Night 44 HEALTH: Alarm Over Suicides & Mental Health 46 FEATURE: Staying Healthy at Pride 48 The Buzz: Snippets of news 50 WORDPERFECT: Being Dianne

The Heart is the Size of a Fist 51 MUSIC MOVES: 2022 Grammy Awards 58 OUT TAKES

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3

32

34

36

FASHION 24-27 Fashion

44

SCENE OUT

14 - 17 CAPE TOWN PRIDE 2022 LAUNCH

REVIEWS

52 OUT ON FILM: Coming Out Colton 54 : Power of the Dog 56 : 50 Shades of Gay

Cover: Grant J. Peres (Lady G) at Pride Launch

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FROM THE EDITOR Welcome all This is the 50th issue of OUT Africa Magazine! As you can see all 50 covers are on this issue’s cover. It is also the Cape Town Pride issue so is full of information regarding the various Pride events ... you can see the full calendar if you turn to page 4.

I hope you are all vaxxed in preparation for Cape Town Pride 2022. Pride month kicks off on the 6th February and continues till the final event on the calendar, the Pride Proms which is on the 9th March. Note the all the events on the Pride calendar will be restricted to those people who’ve been vaccinated or tested - this will be rigorously enforced!

We feature the very talented local singer Grant J. Peres on page 8 who is not only appearing on the Pride stage at the festival Mardi Gras on the 26th Feb, but is also one of the soloists at the Pride proms.

There are loads of pics in this issue of some of the events which happened in Cape Town - The launch of Pride 2022 in November and the very successful Buddies night in December.

We recently heard of the tragic passing of the current Miss Cape Town Pride, Adrienne Galagatsi. Turn to page 36 where we also say goodbye to LGBT+ icons, Arch Bishop Desmond Tutu and the inimitable Betty White.

The other personality feature is on South African author, Renaldo Schwarp on his new book Skeef. Turn to page 32...

In the OUT on Film pages we feature two offerings from Netflix: Coming Out Colton, a 5-part series about Colton Underwood’s coming out journey, and the new film Power of the Dog, starring Benedict Cumberbatch which is set to sweep the awards season.

The Music page features some of the LGBT+ artists who are nominated to receive a coveted Grammy Award this year.

Wordperfect on page 48 features two of the books which will be featured at this year’s Pride Bookcase events.

Our regular features, Guy Candy, The Buzz which has interesting information and snippets on what’s happening in the LGBTQI+ world.

This issue has something for everyone.

Stay safe, remember to social distance, mask up... and for F’s sake get vaccinated ... and have a happy Cape Town Pride 2022. Finally after 2 years we are #togetheragain

MANAGING EDITOR: Tommy Patterson 082 562 3358 ISSN 2304-859X Published by: PATTERSON PUBLICATIONS P.O. Box 397, Sea Point 8060 Cell: 082 562 3358 E-mail: outmagafrica@telkomsa.net outmagazine@mweb.co.za outlet@telkomsa.net

CONTRIBUTORS: Renaldo Schwarp PHOTOGRAPHY: l

ADVERTISING SALES: Tommy Patterson 082 562 3358 Copyright: All articles, stories, interviews and other materials in OUT Africa Magazine are the copyright of the publication or are reproduced with permission from other copyright owners. All rights are reserved. No materials may be copied, modified, published or otherwise distributed without the prior written permission of OUT Africa Magazine.

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The views, opinions, positions or strategies expressed by those providing comments in this publication are theirs alone, and do not necessarily reflect the views or opinions of OUT Africa Magazine or any employee thereof. OUT Africa Magazine and Patterson Publications cc., will not be liable for any errors, omissions, or delays in any information contained in the publication.

NEWS

CAPE TOWN PRIDE IN CAPE TOWN IS HAPPENING AGAIN! lans are well underway for this years Cape Town Pride Event.

Voted by InterPride as the Best Pride in Africa this years Pride event will be taking place as an in-person event for the first time in 2 years. As we all too aware the Covid pandemic played havoc with live events the world over, so it is with great fanfare that we are able to announce that Cape Town Pride will be taking place one again. This year the Pride month calendar has over 15 events during the month of February culminating in the Cape Town Pride March, Festival and Mardi Gras on the 26th February. Theme: #togetheragain Note: We have been advised that numbers have been restricted to all events so it is important that anyone wishing to take part book their tickets online early so as to avoid disappointment.

Events to watch out for are the movie week. Sponsored by the Swedish Institute and the Swedish Embassy, we will be presenting three classic LGBT+ films, The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert, Torch Song Trilogy and The Normal Heart as well as two Swedish films, Something Must Break and Girls Like Us. All screening will take place at the Labia Theatre from the 7 – 11 February.

Another highlight on the Pride Calendar is the Cape Town Pride Proms. This glittering event will showcase local South African talent performing with the Cape Town Philharmonic Orchestra with a line-up of music reflecting the contribution LGBTI+ composers, song writers, choreographers and performing artists have made to the world of music and entertainment. This is the last event on the calendar on the 9th March ...

What a night it promises to be! Tickets for the Cape Town Pride Proms are available at Computicket.

Look out for the ever-popular Mr & Miss Cape Town Pride pageant at the Joseph Stone Auditorium on the 19th February. Tickets from Computicket.

Bear in mind that owing to Government covid 19 requirements all events have strict covid protocols … limiting entrance to the events to those who are vaccinated, have valid PCR or lateral flow tests. Again numbers are limited in accordance with regulations so book now at www.quicket.com !

Pride Month is from 6 Feb – 9th March The Cape Town Pride Parade, Festival & Mardi Gras will be at the Green Point Track, Green Point. As in previous Prides there is a line up of incredible local performers and singers on the Pride stage who will keep you on your feet from 13:00 to 21:00.

The Pride March kicks off at 12:00 from the Green Point Traffic Department parking and will go along Somerset road to the Green Point Track Note that there is parking and a DIDI drop-off & Pick-up area.

Once again ... Ticket information: www.quicket.com NOTE: Pride Proms, Mr & Miss Cape Town Pride Pageant and Diva’s Extravaganza tickets are through Computicket

Another highlight on the calendar is the Cape Town Pride Icon Awards and the South African Inclusivity & Diversity Awards (SAIDA) happening at the Cape Royal Yacht Club on the 23rd. This is a glamourous night of live entertainment dedicated to honouring those members of our community who have excelled in a variety of fields over the past year. The event is accompanied by a charity auction to raised funds for the Nkoli House Project.

Other events to keep an eye out for are the bookcase nights, art gallery nights the Pride Hikes and Diva’s Extravaganza to name a few …

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CAPE TOWN CALENDAR 6th FEBRUARY

11th FEBRUARY

DRAG BRUNCH

PRIDE PINK PARTY

WHERE: KONG, DE WATERKANT TIME: 10:00

WHERE: ZER021 CASTLE HOTEL, CANTERBURY ST. TIME: 19:00 / 7pm FEE: R30

13th FEBRUARY PRIDE HIKE (1) WHERE: TYGERBERG NATURE RESERVE MEET AT MAIN ENTRANCE GATE TIME: 07:30

TICKETS FOR ALL EVENTS A

NOTE: DUE TO COVID RESTRICTIONS THERE ARE LIMITED TICKET

20th FEBRUARY

22nd FEBRUARY

23rd FEBRUARY

PRIDE HIKE (2)

PRIDE BOOKCASE (2)

PRIDE ART GALLERY NIGHT

WHERE: PIPE TRACK, TABLE MOUNTAIN MEET ON THE GRASS PATCH, AT THE CORNER OF KLOOF NEK AND TAFELBERG ROAD TIME: 07:30

WHERE: ZER021 TIME: 19:00 / 7pm

WHERE: ART IS ART GALLERY, BUCHANAN SQ, WOODSTOCK TIME: 18:30 / 6:30pm

PRIDE DIVAS EXTRAVAGANZA WHERE: ARTSCAPE TIME: 19:00 / 7pm

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TICKETS FOR ALL EVENTS A NOTE: STRICT COVID PROTOCOLS APPLY TO ALL EVENTS - PR

N PRIDE 2022 OF EVENTS 14th - 18TH FEBRUARY

15th FEBRUARY

19th FEBRUARY

PRIDE MOVIE WEEK

PRIDE BOOKCASE (1)

WHERE: LABIA THEATRE, GARDENS

WHERE: ONLINE

MR & MISS CAPE TOWN PRIDE PAGEANT

TIME: 19:00 / 7pm

TIME: 19:00 / 7pm

WHERE: JOSEPH STONE AUDITORIUM TIME: 19:00 / 7pm

CHECK SOCIAL MEDIA OR WWW.CAPE TOWNPRIDE.ORG FOR SCREENINGS

AVAILABLE ON QUICKET.COM

TS FOR ALL EVENTS - GET YOUR ONLIE TO AVOID DISAPPOINTMENT

24rd FEBRUARY

24th FEBRUARY

26th FEBRUARY

PRIDE ICON & SAIDA AWARDS

PRIDE POETRY NIGHT

PRIDE MARCH

WHERE: ROYAL CAPE YACHT CLUB, HARBOUR

WHERE: ZER021 CASTLE HOTEL CANTERBURY ST

TIME: 19:00 / 7pm TICKETS: R500 INCLUDES: 3 COURSE MEAL WINE ON TABLES LIVE ENTERTAINMENT CHARITY AUCTION

WHERE: ALFRED STR DE WATERKANT TIME: MARCH STARTS AT 12:00 (noon)

PRIDE MARKET PRIDE FESTIVAL & MARDI GRAS WHERE: GREEN POINT TRACK TIME: 13:00

AVAILABLE ON QUICKET.COM ROOF OF VACCINATION / VALID PCR OR LATERAL FLOW TEST

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TH 2022 ICON AWA AWA

The second awards night, honouring a number of people in the LGBTI+ com have conributed in making the world a better place for our entire communit the 23rd of February and will include live entertainment and a charity auc agement of Cape Town Pride urge anyone wishing to attend to book early a anyone atteneding any of the Pride 2022 events will need to

24th FEB

Recipients of this years ICON AWARDS 2022 are: For his OUTSTANDING CONTRIBUTION TO CAPE TOWN PRIDE: David Lee The HOMETOWN HERO AWARD: Louis Heyneman MEDIA PERSONALITY: Julian Naidoo LGBTIQ+ ACTIVIST OF THE YEAR: Thando Hermanus TOP CONTRIBUTING MUSICIAN OF THE YEAR: Yahto Kraft TOP CONTRIBUTING PERFORMER OF THE YEAR: Maxine Wilde BEST NEWCOMER IN ENTERTAINMENT: Grant J. Peres For OUTSTANDING WORK IN DISADVANTAGED COMMUNITIES: Pumesa Runeyi TOP CONTRIBUTING YOUTH ADVOCACY PERSON 2022: Karl Hildebrandt For OUTSTANDING CONTRIBUTION TO THE HEALTH & WELL-BEING OF THE LGBTIQ+ COMMUNITY: Dr. Johan Hugo

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HE ARDS & SAIDA ARDS

mmunity who have excelled in various categories and those corporates that ty. The glittering gala event will take place at the Cape Royal Yacht Club on ction . Last yuear’s event was sold out and with limited numbers, the manaowing to Covid restrictions on numbers. Cape Town Pride also advise that o have proof of vaccination, a valid PCR or Lateral Flow test.

BRUARY

Recipients of the SAIDA (SOUTH AFRICAN INCLUSION & DIVERSITY AWARDS 2022 are: For INNOVATIVE PRIDE SUPPORTER OF THE YEAR: Halewoods The NEW AFFINITY GROUP OF THE YEAR AWARD: OLD MUTUAL LGBTI+ EMPLOYEE NETWORK OF THE YEAR: MICROSOFT EXTERNAL MEDIA CAMPAIGN OF THE YEAR: VISA LGBTI+ EMPLOYER OF THE YEAR: PWC

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FEATURE

GETTING TO KNOW GRANT J PERES Mag 8

GRANT JOZHUA PERES BURST ON TO THE CAPE TOWN PRIDE STAGE WITH A PERFORMANCE AT THE PRIDE LAUNCH EVENT THAT LEFT THE CROWD SCREAMING FOR MORE ... SINCE THEN HE HAS BEEN BOOKED TO PERFORM WITH THE CAPE TOWN PHILHARMONIC AT THE CAPE TOWN PRIDE PROMS AND AT THE PRIDE FESTIVAL IN FEBRUARY. OUT CHATTED TO GRANT TO GET TO KNOW A LITTLE MORE ABOUT THIS PHENOMENAL PERFORMER ...

To introduce to our readers, I want to cover a few background details …

OUT: Where were you born and raised?

GRANT: I was born and raised and reside in Ceres, also known as the Valley of Fruitfulness in the Witzenberg Area.

OUT: Did you remain “in the closet” during your school years?

GRANT: I was fortunate enough to never have needed to shy away from who I really was. I think being a creative child and having my Mom at my school as a teacher definitely helped.

From arts n crafts, acting, singing in the school choir to playing netball with boys and girls after school, made my school years absolutely fantastic.

OUT: Were you bullied, made fun of or picked on in any way because of your sexual orientation?

Not to my face though. But I am one hundred percent certain that that could’ve happened, behind my back.

OUT: Bullying is such a huge problem in our schools today, how did you deal with any homophobia growing up?

GRANT: Ceres is such a small place and was very much conservative back then, that having a fantastic group of friends with such strong personalities and opinions, from primary straight through high school, helped. I remember in high school there was also a lot of support from our teachers and having two of them being “out” was amazing.

OUT: When did you come out to your family and what was their reaction?

GRANT: I have such and incredible family. Their support has been and still is second to none. They’ve never judged or questioned my being ever and because of that … coming out never happened, because I have literally always been out. I was forever playing with my younger sister’s mini pink sewing machine, trying to make garments for the dolls, so it was a given.

OUT: You are fortunate to be a talented singer, at age did you discover this talent and when did you first start performing to an audience?

GRANT: Oh I started young. I have always known deep in my heart that I could sing but because I had a very raspy and hoarse voice, my mother says, I was forever whistling in and around the house, obviously driving everyone bonkers. I started singing in primary school choir at aged 9 or so. We were singing at school concerts and eisteddfods and then in back high school at age 13, I joined a travelling gospel group. This is what introduced me to a broader audience and also launched my solo singing career.

OUT: When did you invent your drag alter-ego, Lady G? GRANT: Lady G wore her first heels at maybe age 9 or 10 ish.

The church had a clothing drive and there was a pair of white pumps with my name on it. Needless to say my feet looked like fully proofed dough, ready to be baked at 180.

The name; The Lady Gaisha or Lady G, as she is known now, I got sometime in my 20’s. Back then your drag name was given by the elders, but because I was always putting my friends in drag and doing their makeup, even though I was the youngest, I named myself. I never did drag or wanted to put on a frock but eventually in 2014 on a ship somewhere in the Caribbean between Mexico and Miami, at my Carnival-themed birthday party, I stepped out in full geish/drag.

OUT: Most drag performers I have seen lip-sync, you are fortunate to be able to use your own voice as you have a vocal range that you can sing as a “woman”, was this self-taught or have you had professional voice training?

GRANT: During my school choir days I had a fantastic choir mistress and master. After matric I was studying in Bellville and I decided to put myself in a professional music school, Delycia’s School of Music and at age 19 I got my first professional production and from then on my craft has been honed while working with the most incredible vocal coaches and musical directors in our industry.

OUT: For how long have you been singing professionally?

GRANT: For an amazing 20 years. A few downs as it should, but the ups outweigh them all.

OUT: Do you have any role models, and have you modelled your singing on anyone?

GRANT: Growing up I literally listened to everyone that was hip and happening at the time but the one person I adored, not only for her vocal ability back then and sometimes now but also for topping so many then and now, is Mariah Carey. I know a lot of people don’t like her for whatever reasons but I love Mariah.

OUT: You have worked on cruise ships. Did you perform in drag and how was this received? Unless, of course they were gay cruises…

GRANT: I’ve unfortunately never had the opportunity to perform on gay cruises yet… but I’ve done drag on board. At a time I did a once a week special appearance for White Night and on 3 World Tours I did a show called Priscilla, Queen of the seas with the cast. The audiences absolutely loved it. Even though some of the passengers came from very conservative backgrounds, especially your older crowds, these performances were a success.

OUT: I saw you perform at the Cape Town Pride launch and was blown away by your professionalism and talent. I see that you will be performing at the Cape Town Proms in February with the Cape Town Philharmonic Orchestra and again on the Pride stage at the Pride festival. Have you performed with an orchestra and how do you feel about becoming a household name in the LGBT+ community?

GRANT: It’s such a privilege to have the opportunity to perform with the Cape Town Philharmonic Orchestra. It will be my first so, she a tad nervous y’all and I am extremely excited to be back in SA to start building the brand and doing what I absolutely Mag 9

love. And on Becoming a household name in our ab fab LGBT+ community, that will for sure be the cherry on top of a very high-tiered decadent pudding.

OUT: As an openly, proudly gay man and a positive role model for young people struggling with their sexuality, what is your advice coming to terms with your true self?

GRANT: If and when you get to a point where you need to talk about it with someone to maybe to get support or to get it off your chest. Hiding who we are from others often means lying and pretending, and that definitely becomes exhausting after a while. It could take your focus and energy away from other important things in your life. Never feel under pressure to come out, whether that pressure’s coming from yourself or others. Take your time and trust your feelings. Only you will know when you are comfortable and ready to go ahead. If you decide not to come out, that’s ok too. Your sexuality or gender identity are still completely valid.

OUT: On a more personal level, are you single, in a relationship or married?

GRANT: Very much single.

OUT: How do you relax and unwind?

GRANT: I love playing designer and of course I always have some good music on.

OUT: What is your binge worthy TV show?

GRANT: This has to be Friends… I even went and bought the DVD box set.

OUT: Who is your favourite singer?

GRANT: There’s so many fantastic singers locally and abroad that it’s kind of hard just to pick one.

OUT: What is this your life’s motto?

GRANT: Without a doubt it has to be ‘Forget regret, or life is yours to miss. No other path, no other way, no day but today.’

– Jonathan Larson – Rent.

GRANT WILL BE PERFORMING AT THE CAPE TOWN PRIDE PROMS WITH THE CAPE TOWN PHILHARMONIC ORCHESTRA AND A FULL CHOIR ON WEDNESDAY 9 MARCH AT THE ARTSCAPE OPERA HOUSE GET YOUR TICKETS AT QUICKET. COM... SEATS ARE LIMITED ...

COVID REGULATIONS ...

DON’T BE DISAPPOINTED ...

BOOK EARLY! GRANT WILL BE PERFORMING AT CAPE TOWN PRIDE FESTIVAL ON SATURDAY 26 FEBRUARY AT THE GREEN POINT TRACK ...

AGAIN TICKETS ARE LIMITED SO IT IS ESSENTIAL THAT YOU BOOK EARLY Note: covid protocols apply. Entry with proof of vaccination, valid PCR or Lateral Flow test Mag 10

COMING TO CAPE?

LOOKING FOR GAY-FRIENDLY ACCOMMODATION? LOOKING FOR A B&B? LOOK NO FURTHER ....

WE HAVE A ROOM AVAILABLE FOR RENT IN CAPE TOWN

Situated in Milnerton, close to My Citi bus route, Dolphin Bay beaches - has bath & shower en-suite, fridge, microwave, toaster & kettle. WIFI, DSTV. Separate access and parking daily, weekly & monthly rates - from R475 p/d

WE ALSO HAVE A ROOM AVAILABLE FOR RENT IN PICTURESQUE MONTAGU

Pepper Tree Lodge is in the heart of Montagu, explore the quaint town, easy access to the Route 62 winelands, and loads of activities, with lovely restaurants close by. Room has WIFI, DSTV and en-suite facilities for great get-away

CONTACT: Tommy on whatsapp 0825623358 or email: outlet@telkomsa.net or Larry at: email: travelfocus@breede.co.za Mag 11

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THE CAPE TOWN PHILH WIT A SENSATIO NAL LIN E-

WEDNESDAY 9th MARCH, 2022

ARTSCAPE OPERA HOUSE

Note: Strict COVID Protocols - REQUIRE VACCINATION/PCR/ LATERAL FLOW or ANTIBODY TEST.

TICKETS R150 R275 AVAILABL E FROM COMPUT ICKET

HARMONIC ORCHESTRA TH...

-UP OF SA’s TOP TALENT

SCENE OUT

CAPE T PRIDE L

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TOWN LAUNCH

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SCENE OUT

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TOWN LAUNCH

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Other people showed the affection of unrequited love

GUY CANDY BE MY VALENTINE

Some of the best romantic moments in gay cinema

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GUY CANDY

Anthony Mackie && Yahya Abdul-Mateen II lock lips in Black Mirror

7de Laan even featured a gay kiss

Jonathan Goff & Russell Tovey in Looking

Image by Pexels from Pixabay Mag 20 Mag 20

Kai Luke Brunmmer (Nicholas) & Ryan de Villers (Stasson) share a clandestine kiss in Moffie

Chris Colfer and Darren Criss kissing in Glee James Franco and Zachary Quinto got tangled in a lip-lock in I Am Michael

Avengers super-heroes Hulkling and Wiccan

Kid Cudi in Josh Mond’s hard-hitting drama James White, in which he plays the gay best friend of the heterosexual lead, Christopher Image by Valentin Tikhonov from Pixabay Abbott Mag 21

PRIDE RAINBOW FLAGS R150 each

SUPPORT THE NKOLI HOUSE PROJECT

Show your support for the Nkoli House Project & Pride and get any or all of the following Pride merchandising items...

String Bags R120 each T Shirts R150 each

Caps R120 each

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Email: outreach@telkomsa.net to placve your order ...

FASHION

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Photo: The Broke Backpacker

TRAVEL

LGBT TOURISM FOR DUMMIES

Source: Andrew Christian (Maya Vukovska)

“It is a big and beautiful world. Most of us live and die in the same corner where we were born and never get to see any of it. I don’t want to be most of us.” – Oberyn martell, Game of Thrones. Before you explore the great wide world, here are a few travel tips for LGBT+ adventurers ....

T

ravelling the world as an openly gay person may not be as easy as you think. Of course a lot depends on where you are visiting. The fact is that the big wide world is heteronormative, as a gay person, there are some things you should know and be prepared for before you head out into it. For some, it simply means travelling to destinations known for their buzzing gay scene, travelling to attend a gay pride event, places where you can meet other LGBTQ+ people, or seeking out local gay bars and clubs. Others are more adventurous...

BE AWARE OF THE BIG BAD WOLF

If you’ve had enough of the package tours, cruises, gay-friendly hostels, and the B&Bs the tourist industry offers to gay people and decide to experience some “real fun stuff” by getting out of your gay comfort zone, don’t for a second think you can safely go anywhere. Just because many countries have legalised samesex marriages and annually host grandiose pride parades, there are many places where it is not safe for gay people to travel. But there is also a darker side to gay travel. It can mean something much more serious when you start to think about safety, cultural, societal and legal issues. There are still many countries in Middle East, Africa, Asia, the Caribbean, and Russia, where the social customs and the laws do not provide friendly and Mag 28

secure environment for LGBTQ travellers. On a visit to Egypt once, I was asked to remove an earring because locals may find it objectionable. So, do your homework and check what the local laws say, and importantly what other gay travellers have experienced, before you book tickets to the world’s less LGBT+ friendly destinations. You definitely do not want to be sentenced to death by stoning just because someone saw you wink at the hotel porter. Or because the taxi-driver was not satisfied with your answer to his question of how come you didn’t have a girlfriend. Always bear in mind that the LGBTQ+ rights in a country do not always reflect the attitudes of the people themselves and the true experience.

ACTIONS THAT CAN PUT YOU IN TROUBLE

While we’re still on the keep-it-safe agenda, let me remind you that in some locations, and not necessarily in countries with rigid anti-gay laws, some actions that seem trivial in your home town, like holding hands and even requesting a double bed at a hotel, can get you in a lot of trouble. It’s not always the laws, but the attitudes of the locals that can punish you for being “allegedly gay” or, God forbid, “openly gay”.

DATING APPS CAN SAVE YOUR LIFE

Well, not literally, but! If you’ve been thinking dating apps are just for dating, you need to readjust your mind-set. If you travel alone, a dating app can do a great job of not only finding you a decent lay for the night, but also of finding some cool local gay people to show you around. Free of charge, hopefully.

TRAVEL WITH ALLIES

A trip to another country doesn’t have to feel like going to war but keeping some allies close is a must. Travelling as a loner has its many advantages, but so does travelling with a group of gay and / or non-gay friends. This way, you will always feel at ease, and be confident that for whatever reason your gay ass might have been busted, they’d come to your rescue. Plus, it’s more fun. Your gay affiliates won’t complain about going to the next drag show or gay bar, because they are here for the same reasons as you. And while old museums are fun, there’s much more that travel to exotic places has to offer.

REMEMBER, TEQUILA IS NOT YOUR FRIEND!

It’s very important that you always stay aware of your alcohol consumption. Especially if you are travelling solo. Alcohol can cloud your judgement. Although you already know that, avoid getting extremely drunk in an unfamiliar environment, say, in a tavern somewhere in Centro Havana, can lead to much worse consequences than doing it in your favourite local where you’re a regular. What’s more, people you don’t find attractive or desirable can take advantage of your disadvantageous situation... try holding it together … it’s just safer.

WHEN IN ROME…

…do as Romans do. And the saying does not apply only to when you visit Italy’s capital! Some over-the-top queens love to behave like they do back home wherever they go. But the truth is that no matter what country you are in, the locals will appreciate if you are the person, THEY want you to be. So, check out the people around you and adjust your behaviour accordingly, at least until you have sussed just how outrageous you can get. After all, you don’t want someone approaching you on the dance floor in a club and whispering in your ear not to act “so gay” in front of everyone. As Author John Steinbeck noted, “A journey is like marriage. The certain way to be wrong is to think you control it.”

SCARED SHITLESS?

12 countries still have the death penalty for private consensual same-sex activity, including Afghanistan, Saudi Arabia, Sudan, Yemen and the United Arab Emirates to name a few.

72 countries criminalise in some form private consensual samesex activity. These include the majority of African countries, as well as a lot of Caribbean islands, such as Jamaica, Barbados, St Lucia, Granada – all very popular, luxury honeymoon destinations!

15 countries criminalise the gender identity and/or expression of transgender people.

We are not trying to scare you out of taking to the road alone.

No matter your sexuality or taste in shoes, when you hit the road, you are just an explorer. Do not let the big world scare you with all its hidden threats and dangers, just seize every opportunity to see every corner of our beautiful planet, but be savvy about it and you’ll have the best time … Happy holidays!

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FEATURE

PRIDE WORLDWIDE 2022 IT SEEMS THAT PRIDE IS ALIVE AND WELL AS THE 2022 PRIDE CALENDAR ILLUSTRATES. OWING TO THE ON-GOING COVID CRISIS, MANY OF THESE PRIDE EVENTS ARE VIRTUAL PRIDES ONLY SO IF YOU ARE PLANNING A HOLIDAY AND INCORPORATING ANY OF THESE PRIDE CELEBRATIONS, IT IS IMPORTANT TO CHECK THAT A PHYSICAL PRIDE IS ACTUALLY HAPPENING ...

HAPPY PRIDE! 23 JAN 2022 - 23 FEB 2022 Midsumma Pride Festival - Melbourne, Australia

05 MAY 2022 - 15 MAY 2022 Maspalomas Gay Pride, Gran Canaria, Spain

01 FEB 2022 - 27 FEB 2022 Auckland Pride Festival, Auckland, New Zealand

20 MAY 2022 - 22 MAY 2022 New Hope PrideFest, New Hope, USA

11 FEB 2022 - 26 FEB 2022 Cape Town Pride, Cape Town, South Africa

21 MAY 2022 - 21 MAY 2022 Belgian Pride, Brussels, Belgium

18 FEB 2022 - 06 MAR 2022 Sydney Gay & Lesbian Mardi Gras, Sydney, Australia

21 MAY 2022 - 21 MAY 2022 Springfield PrideFest, Springfield, USA

19 FEB 2022 - 27 FEB 2022 Vancouver Pride, Vancouver, Canada

23 MAY 2022 - 30 MAY 2022 Vallarta Pride, Puerto Vallarta, Mexico

19 FEBRUARY 2022 - 05 MARCH 2022 Wellington Pride Festival, Wellington, New Zealand

01 JUNE 2022 - 25 JUNE 2022 Columbus Pride, Columbus, USA

25 FEBRUARY 2022 Rio Pride, Rio de Janeiro, Brazil

01 JUNE 2022 - 05 JUNE 2022 Key West Pride, Key West, USA

05 MARCH 2022 - 06 MARCH 2022 Pride Cape Coral, Cape Coral, United States

01 JUNE 2022 - 03 JUNE 2022 Pride Winnipeg, Winnipeg, Canada

11 MARCH 2022 - 27 MARCH 2022 Christchurch Pride, Christchurch, New Zealand

03 JUNE 2022 - 05 JUNE 2022 Guam Pride, Guam

26 MARCH 2022 - 26 MARCH 2022 Tampa Pride, Tampa, United States

03 JUNE 2022 - 05 JUNE 2022 Provincetown Pride, Provincetown, USA

01 APRIL 2022 - 10 APRIL 2022 Jasper Pride Festival, Jasper, Canada

04 JUNE 2022 - 04 JUNE 2022 Ferndale Pride, Ferndale, USA

01 APRIL 2022 - 10 APRIL 2022 Miami Beach Gay Pride, Miami, United States

04 JUNE 2022 - 04 JUNE 2022 Guadalajara Pride, Guadalajara, Mexico

22 APRIL 2022 - 30 JUNE 2022 Tokyo Rainbow Pride, Tokyo, Japan

10 JUNE 2022 - 12 JUNE 2022 LA Pride, Los Angeles, USA

28 APRIL 2022 - 02 MAY 2022 Big Boy Pride, Orlando, United States

11 JUNE 2022 - 11 JUNE 2022 Central Alabama Pride, Birmingham, USA

Mag 30

11 JUNE 2022 - 12 JUNE 2022 Motor City Pride, Detroit, USA

08 JULY 2022 - 10 JULY 2022 Long Beach Pride, Long Beach, USA

17 JUNE 2022 - 19 JUNE 2022 Chicago Pride, Chicago, USA

09 JULY 2022 - 17 JULY 2022 San Diego LGBT Pride, San Diego, USA

17 JUNE 2022 Tel Aviv Pride, Tel Aviv Israel

16 JULY 2022 - 16 JULY 2022 Isle Of Wight Pride, Isle Of Wight, Ryde

17 JUNE 2022 - 18 JUNE 2022 Zurich Pride Festival, Zurich, Switzerland

16 JULY 2022 - 16 JULY 2022 Manuel Antonio Pride, Manuel Antonio, Costa Rica

18 JUNE 2022 - 28 JUNE 2022 Oslo Pride, Oslo, Norway

23 JULY 2022 - 23 JULY 2022 Berlin Christopher Street Day, Berlin, Germany

18 JUNE 2022 - 18 JUNE 2022 Rhode Island Pride, Providence, USA

02 AUGUST 2022 - 07 AUGUST 2022 Reykjavík Pride, Reykjavík, Iceland

19 JUNE 2022 - 26 JUNE 2022 Lisbon Gay Pride, Lisbon, Portugal

05 AUGUST 2022 - 07 AUGUST 2022 Brighton Pride, Brighton, UK

19 JUNE 2022 Sao Paulo Pride 2022, Sao Paulo, Brazil

05 AUGUST 2022 - 07 AUGUST 2022 Amsterdam Pride, Amsterdam, Netherlands

24 JUNE 2022 - 26 JUNE 2022 Pride Toronto, Toronto, Canada

07 AUGUST 2022 - 07 AUGUST 2022 Stockholm Pride, Stockholm, Sweden

25 JUNE 2022 - 25 JUNE 2022 Andalucia Pride 2022, Seville, Spain

08 AUGUST 2022 - 14 AUGUST 2022 Montreal Pride, Montreal, Canada

25 JUNE 2022 - 26 JUNE 2022 Denver Pride Fest, Denver, USA

08 AUGUST 2022 - 14 AUGUST 2022 Prague Pride Parade, Prague, Czech Republic

25 JUNE 2022 - 25 JUNE 2022 Dublin LGBTQ Pride, Dublin, Ireland

15 AUGUST 2022 - 21 AUGUST 2022 Copenhagen Pride, Copenhagen, Demark

25 JUNE 2022 - 25 JUNE 2022 Lexington Pride Festival, Lexington, USA

22 AUGUST 2022 - 28 AUGUST 2022 Silicon Valley Pride, San Jose, USA

25 JUNE 2022 - 26 JUNE 2022 Nashville Pride, Nashville, USA

02 SEPTEMBER 2022 - 11 SEPTEMBER 2022 Malta Pride, Valletta, Malta

25 JUNE 2022 - 26 JUNE 2022 San Francisco Pride, San Francisco, USA

12 SEPTEMBER 2022 - 18 SEPTEMBER 2022 Euro Pride, Belgrade, Serbia

25 JUNE 2022 - 25 JUNE 2022 Winter Pride Dublin Dublin, Ireland

15 OCTOBER 2022 - 15 OCTOBER 2022 Honolulu Pride, Honolulu, USA

26 JUNE 2022 - 26 JUNE 2022 Seattle Pride, Seattle, USA 27 JUNE 2022 - 27 JUNE 2022 Raleigh Pride, Raleigh, USA

6 NOVEMBER 2022 Buenos Aires Pride, Buenos Aires, Argentina 03 NOVEMBER 2022 - 11 NOVEMBER 2022 THE GAY GAMES, Hong Kong, China

01 JULY 2022 - 10 JULY 2022 Luxembourg Pride, Luxembourg 02 JULY 2022 - 05 JULY 2022 Cologne Gay Pride, Cologne, Germany 02 JULY 2022 - 17 JULY 2022 Munich Gay Pride, Munich, Germany Mag 31

RESILIENCE INSPIRES:

A Review of SKEEF: What you want to know about being LGBTIQ

This work is being featured at the Pride Bookcase during Pride Month in Cape Town in February.

Mag 32

Renaldo Schwarp, a radio and television presenter and filmmaker, has been awarded the 2020 SRC Award for Exceptional Achievement by an SU Alumnus at the Stellenbosch University’s Rector’s Awards for Excellent Achievement. He is also the author of Skeef.

Renaldo Schwarp: I do find it more valuable to clothe this book with stories of LGBTIQ + people who show our resilience as a community. I hope these people’s visibility will inspire others to kick open cupboard doors.

Maybe apocryphal, but Pablo Picasso was apparently asked why his Renoir was Skeefed, to which he apparently replied: “It’s better that way. If you want to kill a painting, all you have to do is hang it neatly straight on a nail and soon you will see nothing but the frame. If it’s out of place, you’ll see it better. ” Our Afrikaans gays can be happy that the media personality Renaldo Schwarp has always wanted to be noticed and that he grabbed his childhood difference and predilection for cartoon Tarzan’s body and glitter so that his much acclaimed dock series Skeef could appear in time and he also fits a useful book of the same name could write. Instead of sticking to forgettable spirit levels, he bravely reclaimed his crookedness from the haters and transformed his sparkling personality and flamboyant outlook on life into career success and a positive quality. With drive, wisdom and insight beyond his years - all before 30!

with stories of LGBTIQ + people showing our resilience as a community. I hope these people’s visibility will inspire others to kick open cupboard doors. “ Local celebrities such as Rian van Heerden, Marc Lottering, Charl-Johan Lingenfelder, Boer Damian and Joe Foster are talking about their personal experiences.

Renaldo wisely tries not to give intimate advice on behalf of the lesbians: The touching wives of the popular Male Woman podcast (Angie Gallagher, Candess Kostopoulos, Christi Kruger and Phia Smit) welcome readers into the lesbian front room in a cheerful, welcoming chapter in such delightful Afrikaans that out of pure joy I read it aloud to my poet-beloved!

Where was this book when we were in the eighties searching rabbedoes in tree climbing and shorts? (By the way, as my sisterin-law-married sister Hannelie put it in an online interview with Renaldo: Deeply valued contribution, but the women earn far more than one section…There is a mother’s precious angle, and it stays with you for a long time. The author’s mother, Verenia, writes movingly honestly in “Mommy, I’m gay” about her initial shock and long battle of faith over her youngest’s sexuality and ultimate decision to choose unconditional love. She also answers some of mom’s and dad’s most common questions and pleads with gay children to give their parents time for adoption. At the end of the book there is also under “Get help!” a complete list of local organisations that can support LGBTIQ + people and their families.

This former pupil of Centurion High School has a Maties drama degree and postgraduate teaching qualification. He regularly appears on the box office and nowadays broadcasts from Bloemfontein for OFM. He shares in Skeef: What you want to know about being LGBTIQ in an informal, witty writing style his own journey with his sexuality and outcome story as well as practical advice and stories, in their own words, from celebrities and his friends about what it means to be gay. He looks at the living world of people on the LGBTIQ spectrum, providing historical and international context and a vocabulary for family and those still wondering.

With headlines like “I have to tell you something”, “Life is a drag - sometimes!”, “Take this subject off the air”, “Let’s talk (not) about sex (not)” and “We can not be what we do not see ”you can be assured here is a confident social media-jammed millennial speaking casually, openly and down to earth, and there is significantly less talk of a tragic groaning and gnashing of teeth than in others generations of closet door-open-forced sagas. Renaldo writes: “The most important lesson you need to learn from this book is that you can not change who you really are, no matter how you do your best or pray.” In “God hates gays”, however, he does pause for a while on the inevitable and never-ending gays-and-the-church struggle, noting: “Organized religion and sexuality have never been good bedfellows.” As actor Marco Spaumer writes to his younger self: “You may take where they said you may not!”

No theme is left behind, and while acknowledging that things can also be difficult and dangerous in the heteronormative streets of the sometimes intolerant and hyper-religious Rainbow Nation, Renaldo explains his choice to focus on self-acceptance, authenticity, healthy relationships and happiness and a message of hope for gay people, their parents and allies like this: “I could write a book about stories of LGBTIQ + people who were assaulted or murdered because of their sexual orientation and gender identity. I do find it more valuable to clothe this book

In his expressions of gratitude, Renaldo writes his hope is that the resilience of the brave LGBTIQ people whose stories are included in the book will inspire others to choose openness over fear on a daily basis. The book’s motto is by gay former American basketball player Jason Collins, who says openness may not make prejudice completely harmless, but it’s a good place to start. This young writer’s own bravery, openness and visibility cannot be praised highly enough. Books like his literally save lives.

As one of Renaldo’s best friends, Cher Petersen, a transgender activist, broadcaster and journalist from Cape Town, says in a letter to her 16-year-old self: “How long will this journey take?

When will I ever be fully accepted? When asking yourself these questions, remember that you must accept yourself and that no one else’s opinion should influence your self-worth. You belong, you are appreciated and you are amazing. Love yourself, for no one else will be there for you. ” Hopefully this “Skeefed” book with its striking, colourful exploding cover photo of Renaldo will be widely noticed, read and discussed. Well done to the young writer and also his commissioning and text editor, Louis Gaigher. Let’s hope there are many reprints - rather just spell out the word sequins and not sequence out of respect for the scammers’ flashes !

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Marching for LGBT+ rights in Ghana

PRIDE IS STILL RELEVANT THE AFRICAN CONTINENT HAS THE MOST COUNTRIES WHERE LGBT+ COMMUNITIES STILL SUFFER DISCRIMINATION. THOSE COUNTRIES, LIKE SOUTH AFRICA, WHICH RECOGNISE LGBT+ RIGHTS SERVE AS A BEACON OF HOPE AND IT IS THROUGH PRIDE THAT WE CAN SEND THE MESSAGE THAT THE LGBT+ COMMUNITY DESERVES TO ENJOY THE SAME RIGHTS AS ANY OTHER NON-LGBT+ CITIZEN.

W

orldwide, 71 countries criminalise homosexuality.

Most of these countries are located in the Middle East, Africa, and Asia. In 2021, homosexual relations were criminalised in 32 countries in Africa, and in four countries legislation even includes the death penalty. These countries are Nigeria, Mauritania, Sudan, and Somalia.

There is a high intolerance on the continent for LGBT+ people.

According to a statistica.com, “In a recent survey, most respondents in Africa showed high levels of intolerance towards LGBT+ in their vicinity, Senegal being the most intolerant. 98 percent of respondents from Senegal stated they would dislike having homosexual people as neighbours. Other countries in which over 90 percent of respondents declared the same were Liberia, Malawi, Ghana, Mali, Guinea, Uganda, and Burkina Faso.” The article went on to say, “South Africa, in fact, represents an exception in the African continent. It is the only country that has legalised same-sex marriage and the adoption of Mag 34

children for same-sex couples. It also the second most-friendly destination in Africa for LGBT+ travellers.” The article further stated that “22 countries in Africa do not criminalise homosexual acts. These are Angola, Benin, Botswana, Burkina Faso, Cabo Verde, Central African Republic, Congo, Côte d’Ivoire, DR Congo, Djibouti, Equatorial Guinea, Gabon, Guinea Bissau, Lesotho, Madagascar, Mali, Mozambique, Niger, Rwanda, Sao Tome and Principe, Seychelles, and South Africa.”

It is clear that work needs to be done on the continent to assist our brothers and sisters who do not enjoy the rights and freedoms that we in South Africa enjoy.

In Ghana at the moment, there is a bill being tabled in Parliament, which threatens the safety, livelihood, and health of LGBTQI+ people. The hate bill, titled the “Promotion of Proper Human and Sexual Rights and Ghanaian Family Values” bill, was introduced to Parliament and aims to criminalise the “promotion, advocacy, funding, and act of homosexuality in all its forms.”

If passed, the new law, which includes aspects of similar laws in Africa, would require Ghanaians to report suspected LGBTQI+ persons to the police or face four months in prison. Suspected LGBTQI+ people would be required to undergo conversion therapy or face up to five years in prison. Intersex persons— people born with physical or biological sex characteristics that do not fit traditional definitions of male or female—would be subjected to forced medical intervention, for which they would bear the financial and psychological burden. Activists and allies for LGBTQI+ rights would face an even harsher punishment of up to ten years in prison. The bill also calls for the immediate disbandment of all LGBTQI+ rights organizations and would criminalise any funding efforts to support them.

This draconian legislation MUST be opposed, not only by LGBT+ NGO’s and groups but by the South African Government who represent our constitution. A constitution which they swear to uphold on taking office. The South African government should send the Ghanaian ambassador at the very least, a strongly worded objection to this proposed bill and apply pressure on that government to dissuade them from passing any form of it.

On a recent trip to West Africa, South African President Cyril Ramaphosa visited Nigeria, Ivory Coast, Ghana and Senegal where he was wined and dined by their leaders and their governments, without a single comment made in regard to the plight of the LGBT+ citizens of these countries. It seems that the constitution he swore to uphold both here and abroad was forgotten, or at least put out of mind as he followed another agenda. His silence is an affirmation to these despotic regimes that their discrimination is approved. Our community must be vocal in their disapproval of the Governments silence. It is astounding that opposition parties have not called on the ANC government to explain their reticence in this regard. As they say, “THE SILENCE IS DEAFENING”.

LGBT rights. In a video for the United Nations Free and Equal campaign in November 2021, the UN’s “Global Campaign Against Homophobia and Transphobia”, Tutu said: “I have to tell you, I cannot keep quiet when people are penalised for something about which they can do nothing.

Back home in South Africa, The Prevention and Combating of Hate Crimes and Hate Speech Bill, a bill aimed at reducing offensive speech and curbing hate crimes in South Africa, introduced in 2016 and still sits before the South African National Assembly. This bill, opposed by Freedom of Speech advocates, aims to “provide for the prevention of hate crimes and hate speech” and to “provide for effective enforcement measures” against those who express their “prejudice or intolerance towards the victim.”

“First, gender. When women are excluded, just simply and solely because they are women.

The point is that the bill has been before Parliament since 2016!

LGBTI+ people in South Africa have become apathetic. There seems to be a feeling that since we have won our right to be treated as equals under the law we have forgotten the rest of the community living in countries some of which are neighbours on our continent who live in fear of being out & proud. Two Iranian men were executed on the 2nd Feb for being gay “The two Iranian men were executed today after being found guilty of charges related to homosexuality,” Iran Human Rights Monitor tweeted.

“Human rights websites identified the men as 32-year-old Mehrdad Karimpour & Farid Mohammadi. They were arrested 6 years ago & were in Maragheh prison until their execution.”

Because South Africa has the most liberal constitution on the African continent it is important that we as a community apply pressure on our government to use their influence on other countries in the African Union to decriminalise and legalise same-sex relationships and give their LGBT+ citizens, who pay the same taxes as their heterosexual citizens. It simply wrong that they should be regarded as second-class citizens and worse as criminals simply for being who they are.

The late Archbishop Desmond Tutu dedicated his life to fighting injustice, initially he campaigned against the injustice of the appalling apartheid system and later he fought for LGBT+ rights and acceptance. Many LGBTQ Africans are subject to stigma and abuse, facing unemployment, homelessness and estrangement from their families. He was noted for his fight against LGBTI+ injustice with the comment, “I would not worship a God who is homophobic,” he said. “I would refuse to go to a homophobic heaven. No, I would say, ‘Sorry, I would much rather go to the other place.’”

“But more perniciously, more ghastly, is the fact that people are penalised, killed, all sorts of ghastly things happen to them, simply, solely on the basis of their sexual orientation.

“I oppose such injustice with the same passion that I opposed apartheid.”

It is for them that Pride is relevant!

It is through visibility that we can show the rest of Africa that it is OK to be gay.

That as citizens we are entitled to be treated equally - the fight must go on for the rest of our community out there and also to protect the rights that we fought for and won!

It is for us that Pride is relevant!

The Nobel laureate was passionate about the campaign for Mag 35

FEATURE

A SAD GOODBYE

IT IS WITH SAD REGRET THAT THE LGBT+ COMMUNITY HAS LOST TWO ALLIES

ARCHBISHOP DESMOND TUTU

O

n Boxing Day, 265 December 2021 South Africa lost one of her favourite sons. Archbishop Desmond Tutu passed away at the age of 90.

Known affectionately as The Arch, he embodied all that is right in a person who spent his life fighting against the injustice of apartheid. After the first democratic election in South Africa, The Arch famously urged the nation to “Be nice to whites, they need you to rediscover their humanity.”

In 1984 he was honoured with the Nobel Peace Prize “for his role as a unifying leader figure in the non-violent campaign to resolve the problem of apartheid in South Africa.” and a year later was selected to preside over The Truth and Reconciliation Commission.

He was, as President Ramaphosa said in his eulogy,”our moral compass and national conscience.” He was a man small in stature but with a heart and commitment to fighting against inequality and injustice the size of a giant.

Our community remember him for his outspoken stance on advocating LGBTQI+ rights, decrying all forms of violence and discrimination against our community, famously saying in a video: “I oppose such injustice with the same passion that I opposed apartheid.”

He received the 2020 Cape Town Pride “Lifetime Achievement Award” for his support of our community.

He will be sadly missed - May he rest in peace.

Mag 36

FABULOUS BETTY WHITE

S

ome of us remember The Golden Girls, a TV show that ran for from 1985 - 1992. The show revolved around 4 mature women who shared a house in Miami, Florida and tackled a number of LGBT+ issues at a time when it was pretty much taboo, issues that are still relevant today.

One of the women was Rose, flawlessly and brilliantly played

by Betty White.

Betty passed away on 31 December 2021, a few weeks short of her hundredth birthday.

She was a beloved actress and animal rights advocate who stood by the LGBTQ+ community as a strong ally. In an interview with Larry King in 2014, Betty was asked about her support for LGBT+ rights. Her response was, “Oh, I don’t care who you sleep with, whom you sleep with, it’s what kind of a human being are you,” she said.

Betty went on to explain that she can’t understand those who are against advances in LGBT+ rights, adding that it’s “such a personal, private business, and none of mine”.

She was known as the first lady of television. Almost every generation for the past century had a “version” of the actress/comedian/ hostess/singer they knew and loved. For Baby Boomers, she was Sue Ann Nivens on The Mary Tyler Moore Show. For Gen-Xers, she was, of course, Rose on The Golden Girls. And Millennials know her from her appearances on various TV roasts, SNL, Hot in Cleveland, and The Proposal. Although, of course, anyone from any generation will likely enjoy all of Betty White’s work.

A gay icon that will be remembered and missed.

SCHWEPPES, THE 196 GRAPHICS WITH MODIFIED FOUNTAIN DESIGN ARE TRADEMARKS OF ATLANTIC INDUSTRIES © 2022.

THE SWEET LIFE. WITHOUT THE SUGAR.

TA S T E I S T I M EMag L35E S S

TRANS CHAMPION ADRIENNE GALAGATSI

I

t is with huge shock and sadness that we learned that Adrienne Galagatsi, the reigning Miss Cape Town Pride and a well-known member of the transgender community, took her own life. Adrienne fell in love with the pageant and drag scene in the LGBT+ community, culminating in her winning the Miss Cape Town Pride crown last year.

The body of the 34-year-old, also known as Adrian Heyns, was found hanging in the bedroom of her Eerste River home on Tuesday 18th January. Her funeral took place on the 24th.

The organisers of the Cape Town Pride Festival said in a statement, “Cape Town has lost another force for good. May she rest in Power.”

Adrienne was born in Knysna and worked as a Sports Administrator at the University of the Western Cape (UWC) for 15 years.

“Adrian was an exceptional sports administrator, exemplary leader and a prominent, dedicated LGBTQIA+ rights activist. She was a much-loved and greatly respected individual whose passing leaves both the sport and the LGBTQI+ community at a loss,” said UWC Sport Administration.

“She was a mentor to many student-athletes; she was a devoted dancer and netball ally to countless. Adrian fought so hard for LGBTQIA+ equality when it was neither safe nor popular to do so. She also played a crucial role in securing the rights and dignity the LGBTQIA+ community now enjoys,” they added.

Social media was flooded with tributes from friends and colleagues, heartbroken close friend Cheslin Paris, who taught Adrenne dancing said on Facebook she “continued dancing throughout your studies and had a very successful dance career with numerous accolades, retiring as an undefeated USSA Champion.” Adding, “You have earned the respect of the LGBTIQ community through blood, sweat and tears and your humility is what kept you grounded all these years.

You have also done exceptional work in the community to do your bit for your brothers and sisters. Your legacy will continue to live on for many years.”

According to Paris, Adrienne started living as a transgender woman in recent years. “I know this was not an easy journey but like every aspect of your life, you soldiered on and lived your life unapologetically, determined to reach your goals. I am happy that you left this life being authentically you!”

OUT Africa Magazine sends sincere & heartfelt condolences to her family, friends and colleagues.

Mag 38

WE NEED YOUR HELP NKOLI HOUSE* CAPE TOWN PRIDE COMMUNITY CARE CENTRE

Photo by Kampus Production from Pexels

ABOUT US

Cape Town Pride in conjunction with OUTREACH AFRICA is a registered NPO (157-896 NPO) serving the needs of the LGBTI+ community in Cape Town, South Africa

AIM

We are currently in negotiations with the City of Cape Town, and Provincial and National Government and other stake-holders, to secure the premises which have been ear-marked and exist, However, it is in dire need of renovation in order for it to be fit for purpose.

To achieve this goal in getting the Nkoli House* Project up and running we NEED to raise R1 million To this end we appeal to the international LGBTI+ funders for their help.

VISION

#youmatter

The Nkoli House* Project, so named in honour of the late Simon Nkoli, a gay activist and anti-apartheid campaigner, who fought tirelessly for freedom, equality and social justice.

It does not matter how small your donation is – every amount matters.

We hare hoping to have this funding in place by 1 June 2021

TO MAKE YOUR DONATION ...

Please pay using your credit or debit card to We have identified the need for a community our paypal account at: centre aimed at providing a home and safe paypalpayments@capetownpride.org space for our diverse LGBTI+ community to gather, meet and mix with like-minded people – with special emphasis on the or pay on line by EFT to: often-over-looked needs of the silver First National Bank (FNB) South Africa seniors in the community.

Branch Code: 201809, Account Number: 62578991278 Account Name: Outreach Africa, Swift Code: FIRNZAJJ Our Ref: Nkoli House Fund (+ your Name) Your gift is tax Cape Town Pride & OUTREACH AFRICA, P O Box 397, Sea Point, South Africa 8060. deductible!!

86 Pienaar Road, Milnerton, Cape Town, South Africa 7441

TRAVEL

THE NEW ALPHEN BOUTIQUE HOTEL & SPA

Mag 40

THE SPA:

Our new boutique spa has been developed and curated with the ultimate self-care in mind. Spearheaded by highly trained therapists and lauded skincare products, this has become a getaway for wellness and recharge. The beautiful lawns and heated pool, a fully-equipped gym and varied menu options complete the wellness side of this Alphen sanctuary.

THE POOL:

Our heated, 15m pool is now open to both guests and visitors.

While away a summer’s day on one of our daybeds, with a curated cocktail and snack menu from Incognito. The rolling lawns make for the perfect family area – there truly is something for everyone here.

THE LOCATION:

Constantia is South Africa’s oldest wine region and is located around 25 minutes from all major attractions of Cape Town.

The Alphen location is the best of both worlds – with nature at your doorstep and the city buzz or coastal experience just a short drive away.

THE RESTAURANTS:

Our much-loved la Belle remains Constantia’s favourite brunch spot, while the lovely Blanko has had its menu turned on its head. Moving away from formal, the Blanko menu is now more casual and comfortable, in line with the wonderful Constantia energy. Opening since the 15th October, Blanko looks forward to welcoming you. Finish the day at Incognito, overlooking the beautiful rolling lawns of the property with a cocktail in hand while DJs whisk you into the evening.

The Kove Collection would like to introduce the new Alphen Boutique Hotel & Spa; a showpiece that exemplifies luxury in every sense of the word. The perfect place for LGBTI travellers to explore the Cape or simply relax and unwind in unadulterated opulence ...

T

he Alphen property has opened its doors to something new and incredibly exciting. Rooted in Paul Kovensky’s vision of creating something that is both undeniably timeless and covered in luxury, the team has taken on the wonderful challenge of breathing new life into the property, with a renovation and makeover where no element has been overlooked.

You won’t want to leave, nor will you have to.

Marrying the historical structures with the brand new, crisp interiors and adding a boutique spa, heated pool and a gym - the property has modernity and a minimal, gentle feel throughout.

The rich colours of the gardens are perfectly juxtaposed against the clean and monochrome interior, providing the best of both worlds to both locals and internationals, modern design enthusiasts and anyone wanting to indulge in a bit of history.

Essentially, we’ve taken the best from before, immersed it in something brand new, and will be delivering it with the same, five-star hospitality.

The Alphen Boutique Hotel & Spa is essentially our take on timeless.

THE ROOMS:

This boutique hotel boasts eighteen suites, adorned with French panelling and marble, soft linen and fully equipped bathrooms.

The Dower House and Mill Range, as they’ve been fondly called for so many years have both Classic, Superior and Deluxe suites.

This truly is modern luxury at its finest.

Mag 41

Mag 42

Mag 43

HEALTH

ALARM OVER SUICIDES & MENTAL HEALTH IN LGBT+ COMMUNITY

F

ollowing the recent tragic suicides of two prominent LGBT+ (lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender, plus) individuals in South Africa, OUT LGBT Well-being is concerned that not enough is being done to address pressing mental health issues in this vulnerable community.

health, and access to healthcare related to sexual orientation and gender identity and expression in South Africa found that levels of depression, anxiety, suicidality, and substance use were far higher in the 832 LGBT+ respondents as compared to those reported for the general South African population.

On 19 January 2022, it was reported that Adrienne Galagatsi, 34, the reigning Miss Cape Town Pride and a University of the Western Cape sports administrator, had taken her own life.

An aspirational and popular transgender role model in the community, her untimely death shocked the province.

More than half of the participants (57%), for example, were classified as currently depressed. By comparison, general population studies in South Africa have estimated a one-year prevalence of major depression to be about 5%.

Galagatsi’s passing follows the November 2021 suicide of another promising figure: former Mr Gay South Africa and DA councillor Lance Weyer, also at the age of 34. Both deaths were presaged by social media posts that suggested that they had struggled with depression.

While these individuals were well-known, research shows that mental health struggles are disproportionately experienced by LGBT+ people.

It’s widely accepted that these mental health disparities are due to so-called “minority stress”; the effect of widespread and often institutionalised stigma, social isolation, prejudice and discrimination. Minority stress, which is a life-long phenomenon, adds to the existing stress already experienced by all people in their lives.

This trend continues when looking at suicide. Almost two-thirds of the LGBT+ participants (62%) had thought about ending their life at least once at some point in their life. Two in five participants (38%) had also tried to end their life at some point.

One in six participants (17%) had tried to end their life in the past year. For comparison, the level of suicide attempts in South African adolescents of the general population, based on previous studies, is estimated at around 8%.

“Compared to other members of society, LGBT+ people face the additional burden of being excluded, rejected or othered every day in some form or the other,” says Dawie Nel, the Director of OUT. “These stressors can become the straw that breaks the proverbial camel’s back, increasing the risk of depression and suicide among LGBT+ people.”

LGBT+ individuals may have more difficulty in securing employment and may not have the family and community support that others have. Often, stigma is expressed through brutal violence, abuse and rejection by family, colleagues and others in the community.

Despite these very real challenges, there is little focus on addressing the mental health needs of LGBT+ people with affirming and non-stigmatising services. Findings of the report suggest that there may be a large percentage of sexual and gender minority people who have not received diagnoses and treatment that could help them manage their symptoms of depression.

A 2019 report (in which OUT participated) on violence, mental

It found that almost a quarter of participants had been denied

Mag 44

healthcare and 31% reported being called names or being insulted by healthcare staff at some point. In addition, 44% of all participants, and just over half of gender minority participants, reported trying to hide a health concern related to their sexual orientation or gender identity from a healthcare provider.

OUT, which is known for its ground-breaking HIV-related health programmes for men who have sex with men (MSM), is hoping to develop projects and services that will focus on the mental health of the broader LGBT+ community.

“While it’s clear that the desperate need is there, there are very few programmes and opportunities to address this crisis, and those that exist are limited or not widely accessible,” says Nel. “We urge funders, partners, government and other stakeholders to consider how we can work together to provide much-needed mental health services to LGBT+ individuals. As recent events have shown, lives are very much at stake,” Nel adds.

Founded in 1994, OUT LGBT Well-being provides stigmafree HIV and other health services to gay, bisexual and MSM communities. It also works to eradicate LGBT+ hate crimes and discrimination while assisting and supporting victims with paralegal advice and referrals. For more information visit www.out.org.za.

IMPORTANT NUMBERS

IM NO POR T PR TE TH ANT IDE EN CR ISI SHE EW LT SN NIC UMB ER 072 OLE ER 287 631 0 Mag 35 Mag 45

HEALTH

STAYING HEALTHY AT PRIDE

PRIDE is a time to reflect on the health and well-being of the LGBTQ community. Many perceive Pride as an over-the-top party that is nonstop fun and whilst this is true for many, it is not true for all.

M

any people in our community struggle during this time of year. Pride, just like other holidays is not always a jol. Instead, just like the holidays, it can be stressful and challenging for many people, their partners and their families.

Some relationships are put under huge stress during Pride, with some even breaking down completely. Furthermore, leading up to the Pride festivities, many guys take to the gym, working hard to lose fat and gain muscle so they are good looking enough, often to an unhealthy extent. After all, Pride is a time when the hunks strip down to the bare minimum, and whilst everyone relishes the eye candy, it is invariably a sweltering summers day, so it is important that you stay hydrated, get some sleep, eat, wear sunscreen (apply at least 30 SPF every few hours).

Others celebrate Pride with heavy drinking and drug use, which affects mental health and decision making. Some of those decisions include having higher-risk sex, increasing one’s probability of acquiring a sexually transmitted infection.

Being the height of summer, we see people not drinking enough water, getting too sunburned, doing too many things and just exhausting themselves.

This is not true for everyone, and perhaps not even the majority of people who love and enjoy Pride events, but it is a time when we need to look out for each other’s health.

Recognising that Pride can be stressful for you, your relationships and your friends may be half the battle won. Try not to overcommit. Recognise that peer pressure is one of the things that can make or break your Pride day. If you don’t want to drink alcohol, don’t. If you feel you’ve had enough, be honest with your friends, if they are true friends they will understand.

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If you do choose to drink alcohol or use drugs, use as little as possible. Have your friends look out for you and try to be in an environment that is safe for you.

Many Pride revellers may find love and have good sex, and that’s great. But do so safely. Use condoms. Get tested (before and after Pride). And if you are having higher-risk sex, talk to your health care provider about strategies that might reduce that risk — for example, pre-exposure prophylaxis (PreP) to prevent HIV. If things aren’t going well for you and you’re feeling down, don’t hesitate to reach out. There are organisations and groups that are there to help.

One of the ways this is being done is through Anova Men’s Health, which provides counselling and health services specifically for gay men. The Ivan Tom’s Centre is a safe health care space where people can talk about their sexuality and gender identity is key.

Of course we still have Covid restrictions and regulations in place. Make sure you are vaccinated or have had a PCR or lateral flow test before going to Pride. Mask up, use sanitisers when you see them. It is difficult to social distance but don’t hug, kiss or canoodle with strangers.

Finally, whatever you get up to at Pride, do it safely and wisely and you’ll have the best Pride ever and remember don’t drink and drive, spending Pride night in an over-crowded jail cell will put a huge downer on your day and will involve an expensive court case, which may end up with you losing your licence and having a criminal record. Take a Didi to get home, it’s safer and cheaper in the long run.

Totally worth it.

THE BUZZ LGBTIQ RIGHTS increased by a further 7%, to 375.

FRANCE CRIMINALISES CONVERSION THERAPY

And all of this is happening on the back of mounting opposition to any kind of migration, not to mention COVID-related border closures. Consequently, when people’s rights are violated and their safety compromised, their opportunities for seeking safety and security elsewhere have become virtually non-existent.

In the face of so many setbacks it is difficult to remember and celebrate the progress achieved. But some important victories were also won. In July, Argentina passed comprehensive legislation ccording to OUTRIGHT ACenabling a third gender marker based TION INTERNATIONAL, several governments clamped on self-determination across all official identity documents, marking a miledown on the rights of LGBstone for intersex, non-binary and trans TIQ people during 2021. In Ghana a law people who don’t identify as male of is pending which will not only enhance criminalisation of same-sex relations, but female. The US followed suit with the first passport with an X gender marker also criminalise advocacy for LGBTIQ in October. In November the Court of equality. In Hungary a law was passed banning promotion of information about Appeals of Botswana upheld a 2019 LGBTIQ topics, echoing the infamous so- High Court ruling decriminalising samecalled anti-gay propaganda law in Russia. sex relations, thus bringing to an end the government’s attempts to prevent it In Poland law-makers have pushed to from coming to pass. In December Chile the next stage a draft bill banning Pride became the 31sr country to recognize manifestations. In Afghanistan LGBTIQ people, women, and anyone who does not equal marriage, and Canada became the subscribe to the religious fundamentalist sixth country to ban so-called converbeliefs enforced by the Taliban are a target sion therapy. of the regime.

But the reality is, fighting for progress for LGBTIQ people is getting harder, A backlash against the progress for LGand successes are overshadowed by BTIQ issues over the last decade is also growing. The so-called anti-gender move- setbacks and backlash, making efforts to ment of predominantly right-wing forces promote LGBTIQ equality all the more which opposes gender and LGBTIQ equal- important. As writer and LGBTIQ activist Masha Gessen put it at OutRight’s ity, is on the rise, targeting in particular, trans rights. Its strategies have evolved to recent conference: “I don’t know if we using human rights language and pinning will prevail. I have hope. I don’t have a one right against another, making it seem lot of optimism. But hope is a moral imlike accepting the rights of LGBTIQ people perative, and hope is only real if you are doing something to bring the hope for somehow threatens rights of children, of families, and women. Through new tactics future closer. I am not making assumptions about progress being linear, but I the anti-gender movement has sowed divisions in the women’s movement, and know that your work is more important now than it has perhaps ever been in my indeed our own, with rising opposition lifetime.” to trans rights. Violence and murders of

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trans people have increased. According to the Trans Murder Monitoring Project, at least 350 trans people were killed in 2020, marking a 6% increase to data from 2019.

In 2021 the number of those murdered Mag44 48 Mag Mag 46

So while my hopes for inclusive rebuilding and recovery may have been dented, we’ll keep fighting in 2022, and every year after that.

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rance has passed a new law criminalising the use of so-called “conversion therapy” to attempt to change the sexual orientation or gender identity of LGBTQ people.

The measure was passed unanimously by the National Assembly, 142 votes to 0.

Anyone convicted under the new law could face fines of up to €30,000 and two years in jail.

President Emmanuel Macron praised the move, tweeting that “being oneself is not a crime”.

The law had already been overwhelmingly backed in the French upper house, the Senate, where it was passed by 305 votes to 28, with the conservative Republicans party opposing it.

The bill will now take force in the next 14 days once signed off by Mr Macron.

Laurence Vanceunebrock, an MP with President Macron’s ruling En Marche party, sponsored the bill through the assembly and said that the law gave “a strong signal because we are formally condemning all those who consider a change of sex or identity as an illness”.

Clément Beaune, the Europe minister in Mr Macron’s centrist government, who is gay, tweeted that he was “proud of this agreement”.

Why is this important to us in Africa? ...

Reunion is a department of France so the same laws apply and France has huge influence in their former African colonies, so here’s hoping other countries will follow their example... one can only hope!

BOTSWANA PRESIDENT UPHOLDS GAY RIGHTS

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otswana’s president vowed on Monday 255 January, 2022 to fully implement a court ruling decriminalising homosexuality in the landlocked Southern African country, two months after losing an appeal to overturn the ruling.

President Mokgweetsi Masisi invited representatives of the LGBT community to assure them that he would respect the court’s decision and protect their rights. “We ask and expect everyone to respect the decisions of our court,” he said during his meeting with members of the Lesbians, Gays and Bisexuals of Botswana (Legabibo).

NAMIBIA LGBTQ+ FIGHT FOR EQUALITY

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huge rainbow flag has been painted on the sidewalk outside the Brewers Market in Windhoek, Namibia as part of their Pride 2022. A spokesperson for Namibia Equal Rights campaign said on Twitter: “The Rainbow Sidewalk is not just a flag on a pavement. But a sign of love, hope, peace and solidarity. A sign that the LGBTQ+ community belongs in this beautiful country. That they are beautiful and deserving of every ounce of equality.”

He assured them that his appeal to the court, which was rejected in November 2021, was motivated by political concerns and not by animosity towards them, recalling that “we live in a rather conservative society. The president’s invitation to members of the LGBT community marks a major turning point in Botswana.

Five years ago, the Legabigo group had to go to court to circumvent a government ban on its existence. In 2019, the court in Botswana’s capital, Gaborone, ordered that laws punishing same-sex relationships be amended, calling them “relics of the (British) Victorian era” that “oppress a minority.”

The ruling, hailed as “historic” internationally, was eagerly awaited across Africa, where homosexuality remains illegal in more than half of subSaharan countries. But the government appealed the decision in October 2021, arguing that this “political issue” should be decided by parliament, not the courts.

SOCIAL MEDIA - GRINDR REVEALS ALL

Grindr are taking a leaf out of Spotify’s book, and no, not by providing consumers with great value for money, but rather by rounding up a ton of data about the users and their sex lives worldwide.

“Grindr Unwrapped is a playful way to help our users get to know each other better, it serves as an ice-breaker for conversations on the app, and provides some interesting insights into trends from the past year,” said Alex Black, Grindr’s director of marketing, in a statement.

Ice breakers, huh… There you have it guys, try swapping out “Pics?” for “isn’t it fascinating that Paris has more Grindr users than LA?” It’s a sure-fire way to get a guy to show you his Eiffel Tower.

Some of the data mentioned includes, ‘Countries with the highest percentage of tops’, with which the Philippines topped, followed

by Colombia, Argentina, Israel, and India.

“The Rainbow Sidewalk is the second in Africa and to many LGBTQ+ persons it’s a statement of solidarity against discrimination”

Countries with the highest percentage of bottoms: Vietnam, China, South Africa, Peru, and Poland. (Absolutely mind-blown that the buckets of Dublin didn’t make the list).

Cities with the most users overall were Paris, followed by London, and then New York.

Meanwhile, the United States were most likely to look for fun “Right Now”, while the Australians were the keenest to receive NSFW pics. (© Cocktails & Cocktalk)

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WORD PERFECT

BEING DIANNE

by Qarnita Loxton

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ianne is divorced but for the sake of her two daughters she lives next to her ex-husband, sharing a joint double garden. Good for the girls but what about her? How can she move on if Alan and his new fiancée are always around?

Her post-divorce romances have stalled: Andile, her lover turned friend, and Faye, her secret Tinder date turned sometimes lover. Both Andile and Faye want more but Di is not sure what she wants. Her daughters were not thrilled with the idea of her with a boyfriend, will they freak out if their mom has a girlfriend? Is it even worth introducing them if Faye might turn out not to be the one for her?

But when Dianne’s eldest daughter deals with homophobia at school, Dianne feels compelled to speak out and be honest about who she is.

With the support of her friends Kari, Lily, Shelley and now Shireen, she might just have the courage to do it. But what will the fallout be?

This work is being featured at the Pride Bookcase during Pride Month in Cape Town in February.

THE HEART IS THE SIZE OF A FIST

by P.P. Fourie ‘My parents are dancing together to something silly on the radio, Elvis, I think, and my father lifts his hand, in dance, midturn, and in a careless thoughtless instance my mother ducks, flinches, at that hand in the air, a muscle memory from a recent terror . . .We all see it, and regard each other, and know what is coming.’

The Heart Is the Size of a Fist is a story of a boy’s complicated relationship with his violent, but charismatic, alcoholic father. Looking back on a childhood lived under the influence of this man, the son, Paul, recalls periods that his parents reconciled, followed by times of desperate flight with his damaged mother. It is also a poignant coming-of-age and a coming out tale as Paul discovers his identity.

And a story of brotherly love, as he seeks to protect from harm his estranged half brother – the only other person who can call that man ‘Dad’.

This work is being featured at the Pride Bookcase during Pride Month in Cape Town in February.

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MUSIC MOVES

THE 2022 Grammy Awards

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he 64th GRAMMY Awards which recognises recordings released between Sept. 1, 2020 — Sept.

30, 2021, and which was due to take place on 31 January has been postponed ... you guessed it ... Omicron!

Doja Cat

That being said, the nominations include a host of LGBT+ artists. Leading the pack is queer rapper Doja Cat with eight nominations. But there were a number other LGBTQ+ artists who also got recognised for their work in music this past year, including Lady Gaga and Brandi Carlile, as well as some newcomers, like Japanese Breakfast and Arlo Parks.

Lil Naz X

Doja Cat is up for Grammys for Record, Song, and Album of the Year (for “Kiss Me More” and Planet Her), as well as for Best Pop Vocal Album, Best Melodic Rap Performance for “Need to Know,” and Best Rap Song for “Best Friend” with Saweetie. She’s also a featured artist on Album of the Year nominee Montero.

Halsey Halsey’s latest album If I Can’t Have Love, I Want Power was nominated for Best Alternative Music Album Brandy Clark

Lil Nas X is up for five Grammys this year, including Album, Record, and Song of the Year, as well as Best Music Video for “Montero” and Best Melodic Rap Performance for “Industry Baby.”

Also with five nominations is Gaga, including Album of the Year and Best Traditional Pop Vocal Album for her Tony Bennett collaboration Love for Sale, and Best Pop/Duo Group Performance and Best Music Video for “I Get a Kick Out of You” from that album.

Tyler The Creator

Again with five nominations this year is Brandi Carlile. While she’s previously won in Country and American Roots categories, this year she’s up for Best Pop Solo Performance for “Right on Time” along with a Best American Roots Performance nomination, Record of the Year, and two entries in Song of the Year.

Tyler, the Creator, is up for two Grammys, Best Rap Album and Best Melodic Rap Performance.

T.J. Osbourne

The Brothers Osborne, one, T.J. came out as gay this year, and the band is nominated for Best Country Duo/Group performance for “Younger Me,” and Best Country Album for Skeletons.

Megan Thee Stallion, who has often publicly talked about her attraction to both women and men, picked up a nomination for Best Rap Performance for her song “Thot Shit.”

Bisexual rapper Cardi B scored a nomination for Best Rap Performance for “Up.” St. Vincent, Annie Clark’s latest album Daddy’s Home is one of four albums in the Best Alternative Music Album category made by queer people.

Best New Artist and Best Alternative Album nominee Japanese Breakfast’s lead singer and songwriter Michelle Zauner is bisexual.

The queer Pakistani musician, Arooj Aftab was nominated for Best New Artist.

Arooj Aftab

Brandy Clark for her song with Brandi Carlile, “Same Devil” which is nominated for Best American Roots Performance.

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OUT ON FILM

COMING OUT COLTON A new Netflix docu-series has been released following the coming out journey of NFL and reality star Colton Underwood ....

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At the beginning of December, Netflix aired a 5-part docuseries Coming Out Colton, the coming out story of American NFL player and the winner of the Bachelor reality series, Colton Underwood.

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oming Out Colton follows the parts, people and important issues in his life that affected his coming out story. His family, who are hugely supportive, the sport that made him a superstar and the primary reason for living in the closet, his faith which denied him being his true self, his friends and his public persona as a football and reality star.

The series is engrossing and whilst most of us are not famous, drop-dead gorgeous or living in the spotlight, there are common dilemmas that every gay person faces at some point on the journey to facing and accepting their sexuality in a world that condemns, ridicules, and ostracises people based on their LGBT sexual identity.

Coming out for everyone is different. We all deal with it in different ways, but which ever way one chooses to do it, it is a brave, life-altering experience. For some it isn’t a long, drawn-out process, for others it may take years and some people never pluck up the courage to come out at all. And the journey is ongoing. One will need to come out over and over as one meets new people, embarks on new careers, when travelling to places where no one knows you and you don’t know their attitudes and how they will react. I came out at 19, and at the age of 67 I still find myself in situations where I will be less open about my true identity until I am comfortable with the people or situation. Knowing that there is the death penalty for gay people in a country I recently visited, drove me straight (pun) back into the closet, if only for a short while… It happens…

Straight people don’t have to do it. They don’t have to struggle with how they will be accepted once they reveal to the world, that they are straight. They don’t face the disappointment and possible rejection by family, friends, fellow worshippers, teammates, employers, or anyone else they come in to contact with. For gay people, and sometimes more especially those that reach the pinnacle of their chosen sport or profession, the fear of rejection is very real. So congratulations to anyone that has the courage to do so publicly. And yes, Colton Underwood after coming out on a national morning chat show in the United States got hundreds of hate messages, but crucially he received thousands of messages of support.

I read an article by a gay man in Esquire Magazine (6 Dec 2021) which essentially slated him for coming out publicly as a publicity stunt. “It was gayness commodified. Fuck selling Tummy Tea on Instagram when you have a whole marginalised community to profit off of, right?”, said the author, Justin Kirkland… what a prick. Fortunately, there are people out there who panned his article with reply’s such as: “So Colton is not the type of gay man that you want him to be? And he’s not your ideal candidate to be the “gay face of Netflix”? Let him live whatever sort of “out” life he chooses and let that be okay.”

“I think immediately it feels wrong to read someone criticize someone else’s story that, while may not be as traumatic as others, is still harder than anything they’ve experienced before and seems to be their truth, no matter how rated G it is” said another.

Someone else wrote, “I fully disagree with this article and find it very bothersome. We should be celebrating everyone’s stories.”

“This article is so irritating and why my fellow gay people drive me insane. You’re always whining and never know when to pick your battles. Just celebrate his journey.”

“Colton’s story is a lot like my own, and actually inspired me to consider fully coming out this year.

This isn’t as much for the out LGBT community as it is for the closeted people who (wrongly) hold on to shame and don’t feel comfortable considering themselves a part of it.”

This last comment is actually what the entire programme is all about. It helped this person and if it helps any other young people, struggling with similar issues, or perhaps in similar circumstances and assists them in coming to terms with their homosexuality, then the docuseries has gone beyond being merely an account of one person’s quest to cash-in on their journey as implied by Mr Kirkland.

Do yourself a favour and watch Coming Out Colton. It is one person’s coming out struggle and if it helps with yours or reminds you of some of the aspects of your own then great. It is serious, it does bring up many of the fears LGBT people experience. The way Colton Underwood chooses to deal with them is his way.

To Colton I say, well done, it was very moving in parts and I for one wish you a happy life ahead as whatever part of our LGBT+ community you choose to be a part of. It is the biggest step in your life’s journey.

As the gay anthem says “… it’s one life, and there’s no return or no deposit. One life, so make sure you like what’s in your closet” Mag 53

OUT ON FILM

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etflix production The Power of the Dog – which centres on the homoerotic relationship between a sexist rancher and his step-nephew – has already been compared to Brokeback Mountain and is rumoured to be the frontrunner for the Academy Awards Best Picture, Best Actor (Dominic Cumberbatch, Best Supporting actor: Kodi SmitMcPhee, Best Actress: Kirsten Dunst, Best Music, Cinematography and more. But is it worth the accolades?

One critic said that this film is “one of the darkest and most powerful character studies and revenge westerns” but admits that it “takes a lot of patience because it’s pensive, quiet, thoughtful, and ultimately devastating.”

Jane Campion is at her very best as director - some of the images are astonishing and the deliberate pacing and attention to detail help build the tension around this story of wealthy ranchers in the American West circa 1925 and the mother and son who come between two brothers. Benedict Cumberbatch is outstanding playing against type as the brooding, angry rancher, Phil, who has dark secrets and anger issues.

The story needs to be experienced to be appreciated, so don’t read plot synopses. There’s more phallic imagery in this film than in a Robert Mapplethorpe retrospective and D.H. Lawrence would appreciate the homoerotic undercurrents that run throughout the film. This is a story about revenge, repression, and rage. Not to be missed. It may be a bit slow and talky for most film-goers who have been numbed out by the mindless junk and other Netflix checkyour-brains-at-the-door films, but anyone who likes cinema as high art should see this.

Others have commented that the film is “a great movie, creating and holding a consistent tone of conflict, mystery, and stark

beauty.” With a “plot is fatal but unpredictable; the Montana setting (actually New Zealand) invades and finally dominates the story; the score is one of the best movie scores in years; and the acting is impeccable.” Adding that Kirsten Dunst is the surprise giving “a spare, entirely convincing performance as a good woman overwhelmed by her brother-in-law’s deep hatred.”

In an interesting opposite take, with somewhat harsh criticism, another critic wrote, “I started to watch this film last night, but I decided that life is too short to finish watching a film that I was unable to connect to. Cumberbatch (Phil) was just a man who for some odd reason liked to be filthy dirty most of the time. I had to wonder why his fastidious brother shared the same bed in that huge house. My mind was beginning to wander; why were there so many ranch hands who didn’t seem to do much work, they frolicked in the river, put up little tents, tormented young Peter (Kodi Smit-McPhee), the rather effeminate son of the drunken Rose, (Kirsten Dunst) and I didn’t see many cows, I thought Montana / New Zealand was overrun with them? The film was so dreary that I decided to go to bed.”

The following day he picked up where he left off. “I won’t give any spoilers, only to say I felt sorry for Dr. Peters patients, one of the best endings I’ve seen. It’s a pity the film seemed to have chunks missing all the way through. The musical score was awful like a class of 5 year olds playing various instruments. I nearly turned the sound off because it was very much like the old silent films, the over acting said it all!”

The best suggestion after having struggled through the film was: “Re shoot the first 2 hours of the film, leave the brilliant, shocking ending and … only then, it would be a winner.”

POWER OF THE DOG ...

THE NEW BROKEBACK? Mag 54

MESSAGE FROM THE DA CAPE METRO LGBTQIA+ CHAIRPERSON: Councillor Rob Quintas It is with great pride and joy that the Democratic Alliance is able once again to be a sponsor of Cape Town Pride.

It has been two long years since we were all together, and we are grateful that this important annual event is able to be held again, here in the DA-run Mother City!

The DA has a long-standing history and association with Cape Town Pride. As the governing party in this city and province, we are deeply proud of this relationship which speaks directly to our commitment to a society based on freedom, fairness, inclusivity, opportunity and diversity. Pride represents so much of our party’s vision of a South Africa where all its citizens can enjoy the freedoms enshrined in our constitution. A South Africa and Cape Town where all communities feel accepted and protected.

There is much more that still needs to be done in ensuring a just and safe society where LGBTQIA+ persons are free to go about their daily lives without fear of abuse, harassment, or worse.

communities, highlights the issues, provides a safe space for people to raise their voices and be themselves, and also provides a space for our community to rise and be proud of how far we have come. Covid-19 has taken so much from us as a community and globally over the last two years.

Let us be together again on the 26th of February, celebrate our resilience as a community and a city, and take pride in who we are and that we are still here.

50 SHADES OF GAY

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hilst browsing the internet researching information that would be pertinent to celebrating this issue’s 50th birthday; that would be appropriate for a Pride issue and that would have a message that is socially, politically and culturally applicable, especially in Africa, where in many of the continent’s countries people who don’t identify as 100% heterosexual are being sidelined, discriminated against and in some cases killed. I stumbled on a 20 minute talk by a woman, Tillett Wright who is working on the Self-Evident Project.

This project aims to show why and how everyone deserves and has the right to be treated equally, regardless of where they lie in the diversity spectrum. Tillett Wright has photographed 2,000 people who consider themselves somewhere on the LGBTQ spectrum, and asked many of them: Can you assign a percentage to how gay or straight you are? Most people, it turns out, consider themselves to exist in the gray areas of sexuality, not 100% gay or straight. Which presents a real problem when it comes to discrimination: Where do you draw the line?

She states that “Visibility is key. Familiarity is the gateway drug to empathy. Once an issue pops up in your own back yard or amongst your own family, you’re far more likely to explore sympathy for it or explore a new perspective on it.”

A perfect message, especially for explaining just why the LGBT+ community will always need Pride. Our community must never be forced to live in the closet.

Go to: https://www.ted.com/talks/io_tillett_wright_fifty_shades_of_gay You wont be disappointed ...

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OUT TAKES “I am an actress, and I am supposed to embody another character. Whatever their sexuality is doesn’t matter to me, the same way watching a gay person play a straight person. We’re actors. We’re supposed to embody a character regardless of their sexuality.” Julianna Margulies

On casting a straight actor in a gay role, Kai Luke Brummer (Moffie) said, “It’s definitely something I thought about, and about representation. As much as I don’t identify as queer, I still believe that sexuality is fluid.

It always has been for me, it’s always been so much more about the person. But it’s definitely something that crossed my mind.”

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