Staying Mindful While Parenting

By Lisa Payne

Whenever August rolls around, I can get caught in contrasting emotions between not wanting summer to end and also preparing for school to start. I never want summer to end. I love having the kids home and not having a schedule. But before we know it, August is here and we have to prepare our minds for a little more stress and structure in our lives.

Not only are we working more and always accessible through technology, but kids are constantly shuffled from activity to activity which also takes a lot of time. On top of that some people have elderly parents they are caring for. The juggle is real.

Engaging in mindfulness practices during any part of the parenting journey is helpful to keep us calm, centered, and ready to take on whatever challenges come our way. Having a mindful outlook helps us appreciate the highs and better manage the lows. It gives us the resilience to approach our families with intention and love no matter what.

How do we stay mindful? Through practice! To be mindful means to pay attention to the present moment. Begin your day with mindful meditation. Sit in a chair (alone in a quiet room) for five minutes and pay attention to your breathing. If your mind wanders, bring it back to your breathing. You can even repeat a word in your mind that you want to represent your day such as “calm” or “present.”

Paying attention to the present moment also means to really be there with your kids when spending time with them. Put away your phone. Bring your focus back to the game you are playing with them, if your mind starts to wander to stresses of the day. You will get good at this through your morning meditation practice.

You can also use this practice when your toddler won’t put on his shoes or your tween tells you that you are the worst. Just pause, take a few deep breaths, observe how you are feeling and proceed. Now you can react with calm instead of out of anger.

This also works well when your toddler tells you that a classmate was annoying at school. If you pause and calm yourself first, you can switch from reacting to shifting to something positive like asking who was a good friend today. And when your teen is upset about something, your reaction from a calm place brings them comfort and safety even if they don’t show it.

When we take time to care for ourselves and keep ourselves settled, we are better able to handle anything that comes our way, which in turn teaches our kids how to take care of their own emotions as well. Mindful parenting is about staying present and calm. It allows us to be more intentional about our thoughts and gives us the ability to soak in more joy in everyday life.

Wishing you a new school year filled with a calm and joyful heart. Happy August!

Lisa Payne writes about food, home, and family. You can reach her at paynefam6@gmail.com