Jewish Action - Spring 5778/2018

Spring 5778/2018

THE MAGAZINE OF THE ORTHODOX UNION

Vol. 78, No. 3 • $5.50

HABITS OF

SPIRITUALLY

STRONG FA M I L I E S

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PERSONAL HISTORY A Chaplain’s Tale During the Korean War

By Rabbi Chaim Feuerman z”l, as told to Ruchama Feuerman TRIBUTE: The 25th Yahrtzeit of Rav Yosef Dov Soloveitchik The Posthumous Life of Rabbi Joseph B. Soloveitchik

By Hillel Goldberg Observing the Rav

By Seth Mandel The Rav and the Brisker Derech: A Unique Method

By Menachem Genack

56 60 70 72 74

COVER STORY: Habits of Spiritually Strong Families Raising Religiously Resilient Children

By Shira Smiles REVIEW ESSAY Shabbat Table Torah Reviewed by Gil Student

Cover: Andrés Moncayo

Talking with Veteran Educator Rabbi Mordechai Finkelman SPECIAL SECTION: Commemorating the 75th Anniversary of the Warsaw Ghetto Uprising Remembering the Spiritual Heroes of the Warsaw Ghetto REVIEW ESSAY Torah from the Years of Wrath

By Dr. Henry Abramson Reviewed by Josh Rosenfeld JUST BETWEEN US Facing Poverty PESACH Making A Seder for the Post-Millennial Generation

By Steve Lipman

DEPARTMENTS

02 06

LETTERS PRESIDENT’S MESSAGE A Parent’s Job Is Never Done

By Mark (Moishe) Bane

12 16 78 82 87 95 102

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FROM THE DESK OF ALLEN I. FAGIN Haaretz’ Misplaced Attack on Birthright . . . and on Orthodoxy CHAIRMAN’S MESSAGE

By Gerald M. Schreck THE CHEF’S TABLE Cookbook Authors Share Passover Favorites

By Norene Gilletz LEGAL-EASE What’s the Truth about …

Eating a Sandwich Wrapped in a Napkin?

By Ari Z. Zivotofsky INSIDE THE OU INSIDE PHILANTHROPY BOOKS The Skeptic and the Rabbi: Falling in Love with Faith

By Judy Gruen Reviewed by Leah Aharoni LASTING IMPRESSIONS My Kaddish Odyssey

By Effy Zinkin, as told to Bayla Sheva Brenner

Jewish Action seeks to provide a forum for a diversity of legitimate opinions within the spectrum of Orthodox Judaism.

Therefore, opinions expressed do not necessarily reflect the policy or opinion of the Orthodox Union.

Jewish Action is published by the Orthodox Union • 11 Broadway, New York, NY 10004 212.563.4000. Printed Quarterly—Winter, Spring, Summer, Fall, plus Special Passover issue. ISSN No. 0447-7049. Subscription: $16.00 per year; Canadian, $20.00; Overseas, $60.00. Periodical's postage paid at New York, NY, and additional offices. POSTMASTER: Send address changes to Jewish Action, 11 Broadway, New York, NY 10004.

Spring 5778/2018 JEWISH ACTION

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LETTERS

GIVING CREDIT The article on Jack Lunzer’s Valmadonna Trust Library by David Olivestone (“The Custodian,” winter 2017) failed to mention Brad Sabin Hill, a key researcher and advisor to Mr. Lunzer who had curated a major exhibition of the collection at the prestigious Morgan Library in New York City in 1989; he also prepared various publications connected with the Trust.

A footnote in the article refers to the November 2017 sale at the Kestenbaum & Company Auction House without noting that the catalogue introduction was written by Mr. Hill.

Mr. Hill had a long and productive relationship with Jack Lunzer and the Valmadonna, having lectured and published on parts of the collection over the course of many years. He is integral to its history.

Esther Nussbaum Retired librarian, Ramaz Upper School Manhattan, New York

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Rabbi Yitzchok Adlerstein • Dr. Judith Bleich Rabbi Emanuel Feldman • Rabbi Hillel Goldberg Rabbi Sol Roth • Rabbi Jacob J. Schacter Rabbi Berel Wein Editorial Committee

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Joseph Jacobs Advertising • 201.591.1713

OVERLOOKING THE PIONEER OF ORTHODOX WEEKLIES In your latest issue where you focus on Orthodox media, you inexplicably ignore the fact that nearly sixty years ago, after meeting with several gedolei Yisrael including Rav Moshe Feinstein—and at their urging—my father, Rabbi Sholom Klass, launched The Jewish Press, a weekly newspaper chock-full of Torah content.

At the time, there was no other weekly, mass-circulation Englishlanguage Jewish newspaper geared to the Orthodox community.

From the start The Jewish Press offered—as it continues to offer to this day—a wide variety of news stories, features and columns from writers spanning the spectrum of Orthodoxy, from Chassidic and Chareidi to Centrist and Modern. And the paper’s readership has always reflected that eclectic mix.

I would have hoped for more from your articles purporting to provide historical context—albeit a passing and, frankly, superficial context—to the rise of Orthodox media in America.

Naomi Klass Mauer Publisher The Jewish Press Brooklyn, New York

arosenfeld@josephjacobs.org

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ORTHODOX UNION President

Mark (Moishe) Bane Chairman of the Board

Howard Tzvi Friedman Vice Chairman of the Board

Mordecai D. Katz

Chairman, Board of Governors

Henry I. Rothman

Vice Chairman, Board of Governors

Gerald M. Schreck

Executive Vice President/Chief Professional Officer

Allen I. Fagin

Chief Institutional Advancement Officer

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Senior Managing Director

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Executive Vice President, Emeritus

Rabbi Dr. Tzvi Hersh Weinreb

Chief Financial Officer/Chief Administrative Officer

Shlomo Schwartz

Chief Human Resources Officer

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Samuel Davidovics

In an otherwise all-inclusive and well-researched section on the topic of Orthodox media, to my amazement there was no feature on the “grand-daddy” of all American Torah newspapers, The Jewish Press, established by Rabbi Sholom Klass circa 1960. How was this overlooked (other than a little picture of an issue on the front page of the section)? The Jewish Press has been the mainstay of virtually all observant homes for decades, whether receiving it by mail for those living outside the metropolitan New York area or buying a copy every week on the newsstand. It has certainly been a source of in-depth coverage of Israel and all political news affecting the Jewish community. There has always been outstanding Torah content by 2

JEWISH ACTION Spring 5778/2018

Chief Innovation Officer

Rabbi Dave Felsenthal Director of Marketing and Communications

Gary Magder

Jewish Action Committee

Gerald M. Schreck, Chairman Joel M. Schreiber, Chairman Emeritus © Copyright 2018 by the Orthodox Union Eleven Broadway, New York, NY 10004 Telephone 212.563.4000 • www.ou.org

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well-known and learned rabbis over the decades—too many to list here—to say nothing of the forum accorded Rebbetzin Esther Jungreis, a”h, whose columns affected multitudes of Jews in ways no other author could.

Your magazine is so outstanding. How did this egregious omission occur?

I enjoy and read many of the outstanding magazines that we now have in English, but if I miss one issue of The Jewish Press, my Shabbat is lacking a certain “geshmak” flavor!

Miriam Fishman Los Angeles, California

Editor’s Note: Jewish Action deeply regrets omitting mention of The Jewish Press, a true pioneer in Anglo-Jewish journalism that continues to bring readers closer to Jewish tradition and disseminate Torah to thousands.

REFLECTIONS FROM A RETIREE I’m writing in response to OU President Moishe Bane’s excellent article (“What If We Actually Had the Chance?” winter 2017). I am currently winding down a forty-plus-year career in advertising and marketing.

Mr. Bane points out that often retirees cannot return to yeshivah because they never had the yeshivah experience in the first place. There is a Dirshu branch in Toronto, where I live, but most likely the learning is way above my skills. There is a “senior” kollel I’m aware of, and I plan to try it out when I stop going to the office in a few weeks. Mr. Bane notes that the beit midrash can effectively replace the social opportunities of business life. The need to have a rich social life is the main reason I continued working into my late 60s.

More importantly he discusses gemilut chasadim— not just volunteering, but using one’s life and business experience to meaningfully contribute to the community.

I agree that the community needs to set up a formalized process to identify seniors’ skills and match them up with appropriate chesed opportunities.

Thank you, Mr. Bane, for your article; you’ve given me chizuk when I needed it.

Often retirees cannot return to yeshivah because they never had the yeshivah experience in the first place.

the Hebrew language. As he mentions, Hebrew language instruction has unfortunately almost disappeared from American day schools. Even worse, he correctly points out the lack of knowledge among day school students about the geography of Israel.

In the same issue, you explore the power of prayer. The two articles in the issue are, in fact, related. Knowledge of the Hebrew language is basic to fulfilling the mitzvah of prayer, as only via understanding the holy words can we become emotionally and spiritually connected to our davening. Understanding Hebrew is critical for tefillah, for learning Torah, and for feeling a personal commitment to the Land of Israel.

Anna Thee Shoresh, Israel GREAT MAGAZINE I recently came across a copy of Jewish Action, and instantly became a fan, devouring article after article. When I get the opportunity, I read an article from Jewish Action at the Shabbat table. I am extremely impressed with the standard and quality of writing and have learned so much. Thank you for your excellent magazine.

Raphael Adams Toronto, Canada

Ruth Yael Ben-Adir Gush Etzion, Israel

WHATEVER HAPPENED TO HEBREW?

GREEK PHILOSOPHY IN JEWISH THOUGHT?

In the fall 2017 issue, OU Executive Vice President Allen Fagin discusses aliyah (“Aliyah—Fulfilling the Dream”) and raises the question of whether “we, as a community, view yishuv Ha’aretz as a basic tenet of our spiritual aspirations.”

Having made aliyah forty-eight years years ago, and b”H already seeing our third frum Israeli generation here, I was pleased to see Mr. Fagin touch upon the subject of teaching

In Rabbi Rafi Eis’ interesting article “Praying to the Wrong God” (fall 2017), the questions he asks and the solutions he proposes are important not only for tefillah, but for Jewish belief in general.

The author does, however, make a few troubling comments, revealing a leaning toward Biblical revisionism.

In the view of the revisionists, the Torah evolved over

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JEWISH ACTION Spring 5778/2018

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a long period of time. Accordingly, classical Jewish commentators do not have any more authority than later commentators, irrespective of whether they are discussing halachic or hashkafic issues. This approach is obviously inconsistent with mainstream Orthodoxy.

In his article, Rabbi Eis, for instance, drawing upon a dilemma addressed in Sefer Ikkarim, implies that the great medieval Spanish philosophers derived their insights into God from Greek rather than Torah sources. He states that “the great works of the medieval Spanish philosophers, . . . generally begin with an Aristotelian orientation that defines God as the prime or unmoved mover. This God is emotionless, perfect and unchanging, which does not correspond to the way we think of God in the Bible or with our perceptions of tefillah.”

Similarly, he writes: “We find the infectious and seductive nature of Greek epistemology seeping into the thought of Rabbi Albo. Greek philosophy tries to delineate God: perfect, unchanging, necessary, all-powerful, all-knowing, et cetera . . . In contrast, the Bible presents a picture of a God engaged with humanity, caring about world affairs and One who sometimes changes the status quo in response to prayer and the raw human cry. This is how God wants us to relate to Him.” I question whether Jewish Action should be publishing material that seems to adhere to an approach that is inconsistent with traditional Judaism.

Yechiel Reit, MD Ramat Beit Shemesh, Israel

Rabbi Rafi Eis Responds: Thank you to the editorial leadership of Jewish Action for allowing me to present a deeply traditional Torah approach that is perhaps less familiar to general readers, which therefore runs a risk of being misunderstood. While the larger point of how we daven could have been made without describing the roots of Rabbi Albo’s philosophy, my goal was to highlight that our approach to tefillah is conditioned by our understanding of Hashem and His world. Dr. Reit’s argument is not with me. The observation that some respected Jewish medieval philosophers were significantly influenced by Greek philosophy is made

by Rabbi Samson Raphael Hirsch in The Nineteen Letters (p. 118-9), and the Rav in The Halakhic Mind (p.

100-102), both of whom then advocate building a pure Jewish philosophy. My aim was to explain these observations and apply them to tefillah using the Gemara. Continuing this approach will hopefully guide and inspire generations to come in Torah.

WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU! To send a letter to Jewish Action, send an e-mail to ja@ou.org.

Letters to the editor should include author’s full name and home address. We generally do not consider anonymous letters. Please note that letters may be edited for clarity.

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PRESIDENT’S MESSAGE

A PARENT’S JOB IS NEVER DONE

By Mark (Moishe) Bane

M

ost of us blessed with children profess that being a parent is our most cherished role and that the time we spend with our children is most precious.

Curiously, however, we often willingly (and perhaps unwittingly) relinquish our parental responsibilities. When our children are young, we assign core parenting duties to teachers. As our children reach adulthood, many of us tend to abandon our identity as parents altogether. By relinquishing our parental responsibilities, we diminish ourselves and our children.

There’s No Place Like Home Day schools, yeshivas, shuls and youth groups play integral roles in the Mark (Moishe) Bane is president of the OU and a senior partner and chairman of the Business Restructuring Department at the international law firm, Ropes & Gray LLP.

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academic and religious development of our children. Impressively, these communal institutions are producing generations of children who are exemplary students, committed Jews and emotionally healthy human beings. Moreover, these institutions’ embrace of our children is essential to their integration into the Orthodox community, and to their ability to continually resist the powerful allure of contemporary secular society.

On occasion, however, we expect too much of the community and not enough of ourselves. How often does the banter around the Shabbos table include complaints about the schools’ failure to teach our children middos (behavior and respect) or how to daven (pray)? How often do we blame educators and rabbeim for our children’s insufficient passion for Judaism, meager intellectual curiosity or misplaced values and priorities? Such complaints imply that we have reassigned these core parenting functions to others. We betray both ourselves and our children if we fail to be the primary players in our children’s upbringing and delegate the responsibility of parenting to educators.

Despite our overburdened lives, and the fact that our children spend an enormous amount of time in school, we need to view teachers as merely assisting us in fulfilling our parental duties.

Unfortunately, we frequently view our role as being supporting cast members in our children’s lives, supplementing the parenting efforts of others. Some may find this distinction a matter of semantics. But whether we choose to

On occasion, however, we expect too much of the community and not enough of ourselves. view educating our children as our own responsibility, or that of teachers, makes all the difference in the world.

The shift of certain roles from parents to the community has burdened our educational institutions with a plethora of non-academic functions and expectations. Rather than having the time to teach our children advanced halachah and the meaning behind the details of various mitzvos, schools are responsible for the threshold parental obligation of imbuing children with a sense of pride in being an observant Jew. Teachers must spend class time introducing a love of mitzvos, such as Shabbos and yom tov, even though our children’s Shabbos and yom tov experiences take place at home. As many of us have increasingly receded from being the source of religious inspiration for our children, schools are compelled to hire staff to introduce extra-curricular programs to enhance

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students’ connection to Judaism. These efforts to fill the gaps not addressed at home consume valuable class time, preventing teachers from providing our children with the full depth and breadth of Torah scholarship that we expect and that our children deserve.

Even more consequential, however, is that only at home can a child benefit from his or her parents’ keen and detailed observations and continual one-on-one interactions, both of which are necessary to identify a child’s intellectual, emotional and spiritual needs. With classrooms comprised of anywhere from fifteen to thirty students, teachers cannot possibly be expected to identify the often subtle characteristics of each student or to offer the personalized attention necessary to ensure that each child’s weaknesses are addressed and strengths are actualized.

Moreover, a scholastic curriculum complements the intellectual orientation of certain students, while frustrating others who may not be academically inclined or have academic and intellectual capabilities in areas not integral to a contemporary school’s curiculum. For example, it is common for a student earning low grades in school to blossom when later exposed to the fields of technology or engineering. It is even more common for students perennially suffering low grades to discover upon graduating that their creative writing skills or business acumen is far more appreciated than was reflected in their report cards. Understandably, absent the careful inquisitive focus of parents, many students’ strengths, creativity, and occasionally even genius are thus never discovered, squandering their potential and leaving them with an inferior self-image.

Each individual also has a unique emotional and psychological makeup, and each child matures at a different pace. Appropriate behavior, ethics and religious commitment should certainly be addressed in the classroom, but these lessons are most likely to resonate only when tailored to the child’s emotional and psychological profile.

In addition, ideas, values and behavioral expectations presented in 10

JEWISH ACTION Spring 5778/2018

school or shul tend to reflect broadly accepted communal principles, perspectives and priorities. In religious communities such as ours, such messages tend to be particularly broad and uniform. In fact, however, values, priorities and ideas are quite nuanced.

For example, attitudes concerning the obligation of Torah study or the degree of involvement in general culture are often misleadingly presented in a “one-size-fits-all” fashion. Even concepts like truth, honesty and loyalty are far more complex than can be conveyed to students in a uniform fashion.

Consequently, if a student learns these and myriad similar ideas in school or shul, he or she is prone to accepting them blindly and possibly misapplying them. On the other hand, he may begin viewing them critically and thereby reject them as being primitive and simplistic. A parent should be the filter through which ideas are tailored to the individual child.

Only a parent (or a caregiver serving in the role of parent) can possibly expend the requisite care, time and focus necessary to address a child’s nuanced intellectual, psychological and emotional makeup. Only at home can a child’s untapped strengths be uncovered and his often subtle weaknesses be addressed. And only a parent can convey values, views and expectations appropriately tailored to a child’s individuality. Therefore, while formal and informal education are certainly invaluable resources, individualized attention from the home is essential to maximize a child’s potential and to shape a child’s middos, relationship with tefillah and love of Judaism.

The Parent as the Underpinning of Emunah Parents’ day-to-day involvement in their children’s lives is not only essential in guiding each child’s academic and emotional growth but is actually a critical and inherent dimension of his or her religious growth as well.

From their earliest years, our children are encouraged to pursue a personal relationship with the Almighty. Not only do we teach them that God sees all even though He cannot be seen, but we also

assure our children that their Father in Heaven loves them unconditionally and cares about every detail of their lives and needs. Adopting these beliefs is challenging, and children are far more likely to embrace these ideas after first experiencing the love and attention of a parent—a parent who unconditionally loves them and who cares about every detail of their lives. An emotionally healthy child naturally craves the love and approval of a parent, and suffers severe alienation and distrust when these longings are unsatisfied. Therefore, a child who experiences parents as being inattentive, aloof and uncaring will likely perceive God as being the same.

The Talmud advises that there are three partners in the creation of an individual—father, mother and God (Kiddushin 30b). If a father or mother parents by proxy, how can the child be expected to believe that God does otherwise?

Parenting an Adult Child As my children left home and assumed increasing degrees of independence, I understood the warning I had received from friends—that one of the most challenging parental duties is to refrain from intruding into a mature child’s decision-making process. Like most parents, however, I reveled in the joy and sense of accomplishment that accompany a child’s maturation into an independent, self-sustaining individual.

I had learned from my own parents and in-laws that providing an evolving adult with “space” is just as important as providing a young child with constant attention and guidance.

Then began the struggle and introspection. Being a father had long been a core of my identity. The role had dominated my religious focus. It had been central to my life’s mission. If no longer a father, what was to replace that role? Who was I if not a father?

The Torah, however, teaches that the parent-child relationship never ends.

A child’s duty to honor a parent never concludes, and the obligation to be a parent is no different. What then is the task of parenting an adult child?

First I recognized that there remains the lifelong parenting role of being

a source of unconditional love and encouragement.

Secondly, I came to the realization that there is one ongoing parental function that is most pivotal. It is a role that never wanes yet is sorely under-appreciated: modeling for one’s children, whatever their age, how one is to live at every stage of life.

Parents of young children are often cautioned that “do what I say, not what I do” simply does not work.

When modeling behavior, however, a parent is not only influencing the child’s current behavior and attitudes. He or she is also illustrating how one is to act and view life as an adult. This function is, in certain regards, the most profound role of parenting. And we cannot deny its impact.

How often do we observe our own adult behavior or decisions and recognize that we have become our parents!

When I was forty-five years old, I was not only teaching my fifteen-year-old child how a fifteen-year-old should behave, but was also imparting the behaviors, values and attitudes that will be appropriate when my child reaches forty-five. And now that I am fifty-seven years old I am doing the same. With God’s help I hope to teach my children how to be a seventy-year-old, and if fortunate, even older. This key aspect of parenting includes modeling how to respond to experiences that, when observed, are hopefully entirely unfamiliar to the child, such as how a religious Jew confronts serious illness, the loss of loved ones and the approach of death.

Parenting Is Essential for Parents The axiomatic rule of parenting is that parents’ choices and aspirations for each child must be based solely on the needs of the child. A child can discern when decisions are influenced by the parents’ own convenience, by an image of themselves that the parents hope to convey or by the parents’ urge to actualize themselves and live out their own dashed hopes and dreams via their children. When a parent does not base decisions on the needs of the child, oftentimes the repercussions are destructive.

Nevertheless, and while seemingly inconsistent with the need for parents to be child-focused, parents must appreciate that they themselves are ultimately the greatest beneficiaries of their own hands-on focused parenting.

Mundane benefits of such parenting may include raising children eager to provide aid in old age or mitigate loneliness. More sublime benefits include reciprocal love, adoration and pride. But the ultimate benefit to parents is the exalted emulation of Godliness that parenting affords. Through the blessing of children one is given the opportunity to be selfless, insightful, compassionate and loving. In other words, through parenting one may reflect the characteristics and behavior of the Almighty, as it were.

How tragic it is when parents squander the opportunity to fully embrace their parental role. Not only do they thereby fail to help their children actualize intellectually, emotionally and religiously, they deny themselves perhaps the most exalted spiritual experience.

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FROM THE DESK OF ALLEN I. FAGIN

HAARETZ’ MISPLACED ATTACK ON BIRTHRIGHT . . .

AND ON ORTHODOXY

O

n November 26, 2017, Haaretz published an article entitled “How Orthodox Groups Are Taking Over Birthright, and Using It to Target Young US Jews.” The thrust of the article was that the Union for Reform Judaism, the “largest Jewish movement in the United States,” had been dropped as a certified trip provider for Birthright, despite its having served in that capacity since Birthright was founded in 1999. The article went on to suggest that this development was part of a “growing trend”—while the overwhelming majority of Birthright participants do not affiliate as Orthodox, Orthodoxaffiliated trip providers nonetheless account for a growing share of Birthright recruitment. According to Haaretz, while the Reform movement will no longer provide Birthright trips, about one-third of trip participants identify as Reform, while one-quarter of Birthright participants are on trips

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provided by Orthodox organizations— Mayanot (affiliated with Chabad); Israel Free Spirit (the OU-affiliated Birthright program); and Ezra World (affiliated with the Orthodox Ezra youth movement). The Haaretz piece went on to suggest that “the increasing dominance of Orthodox organizations in the Birthright recruitment process also happens to coincide with the emergence of Republican mega-donor Sheldon Adelson as a major figurehead in the organization,” and that “Adelson shares ideological beliefs with many on the Israeli right.”

Not satisfied with divisive political conspiracy theories, Haaretz then revealed its true fear: Birthright participation might actually result in Jewish young adults strengthening their Jewish identities upon their return from Israel. The article cites Rabbi Rick Jacobs, president of the Union for Reform Judaism: “When Birthright participants return from their trips with these [Orthodox] providers, there are lots of efforts made to get them to explore a more traditional way of Judaism—and that is something that should not be ignored.” Quite so.

Birthright is an extraordinary organization. Since its inception, it has brought over 400,000 Diaspora Jews to Israel on transformational trips that allow young Jews, aged eighteen to twenty-six, to encounter their homeland, interact with Israeli culture, and strengthen their Jewish identity.

This past year alone, Birthright brought 48,000 participants to Israel. It is, in the view of many, the single most successful

Jewish Diaspora project of all time.

The fact is that since the inception of the Birthright project, the number of trip organizers has dropped from a high of thirty-three to ten (in the United States) today. The Conservative movement stopped providing Birthright trips ten years ago. The Reform movement was dropped as an organizer, not on religious or political grounds, but because it could not meet the minimum participation numbers required by Birthright of all trip organizers, regardless of religious (or secular) orientation. (You don’t get eliminated as a Birthright trip organizer by failing to meet recruiting goals once; you must fall short in two of the last three rounds.) In short, while almost one-third of Birthright trip participants self-identified as Reform, the Reform movement was unable to recruit its own kids! This apparent conundrum led the Birthright CEO to observe: “You need to ask the participants who go with the other trip providers why they prefer them, and you need to ask the Reform movement and the Conservative movement, which was also a trip provider until about ten years ago, why they are not attracting enough participants . . .”

One might speculate about the reasons for this phenomenon. Perhaps it is the result of the increasing invisibility of the Reform and Conservative movements on campuses across the Allen I. Fagin is executive vice president of the OU.

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United States, where much of Birthright recruitment takes place. Perhaps it is the result of the growing ambivalence (indeed, often the open hostility) within progressive movements towards Israel as well as its government and institutional structures. Or perhaps it is the fact that young Jews—who alone decide what trip and trip organizer best suits their needs and aspirations for their Israel experience—are voting with their feet.

So there you have it. The classic Haaretz three-step: if there is something in the Jewish world that leaves you uncomfortable, blame the Orthodox, or the Israeli government— or Sheldon Adelson!

Were the phenomenon limited to Haaretz, it might be offensive, but wouldn’t precipitate the far more profound reaction that leaves me livid.

Why? Because this reaction threatens the very survival of the Jewish people, and it must therefore be responded to with all the zeal we can muster. There are those within our community who seek—consciously and affirmatively—to strip Jews of Judaism and who view Jewish peoplehood as nothing more than a cultural manifestation of affinity.

God and His eternal Torah are irrelevant to (indeed, to some, antithetical to) the true expression of the Jewish people.

And so religious values are anathema; faith is anathema; God and Torah are beside the point. And Orthodoxy as the dynamic embodiment of religious values must be relegated to the outmoded trash bin of history and excised at all cost.

How painful is this? We, the Orthodox community, are not affected by such attacks. They make not a dent in our eternal faith. But what of acheinu kol beit Yisrael, those who seek, who yearn for a relationship with the Almighty and His Torah?

In the increasingly cynical and partisan fissures within the Jewish world, Birthright is a breath of fresh air. It has brought together an array of generous donors and trip provider organizations who span the ideological and religious spectrum. Its overarching goal is to inspire Jewish identity and greater affinity to our beloved homeland. We should be grateful to Birthright’s visionary leadership—and 14

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equally grateful to the wonderful young people who know what they seek in a Birthright experience—and are perfectly capable of choosing the trip provider that best speaks to their aspirations and needs. As Gil Troy has recently noted: “Birthright works because it’s a Jewish identity-building program empowering participants to navigate their own Jewish journeys— with no strings attached. We—the older generation—give the gift. Our reward is watching young Jews engage their heritage in new, exciting ways.”

And Birthright has been extremely successful. According to the recent report of the Brandeis University Jewish Futures Project, Birthright participants are more likely to feel a connection to Israel; have a Jewish spouse (overall, the likelihood of marrying a Jewish spouse is 62 percent for an average Birthright participant and 46 percent for an average non-participant); raise Jewish children and be engaged in Jewish life.

I am extraordinarily proud of our Israel Free Spirit program and its iconic follow-up programming. The OU Birthright trips have the highest rate of trip extenders than any of the certified Birthright trip providers— almost four times the average. For many Israel Free Spirit participants, the highlight of the trip is choosing to have a Bar/Bat Mitzvah, usually held atop Masada. For quite a few participants, this emotional moment, in which many choose a Hebrew name and affirm their Jewish identity, represents their first connection to Judaism.

Our unique Birthright follow-up program offers innovative approaches to transform participants’ Birthright Israel trip into a lifelong bond with Israel and with the Jewish people.

For example, Bring Israel Home is a “competition” where Birthright trip alumni complete an array of challenges—Jewish and Israel-related activities—to qualify for a reunion trip together with the Israeli trip participants who are brought to the US. Over 100,000 Jewish activities have been performed by over 6,000 participants in Bring Israel Home.

Bring Back Shabbat is yet another OU Birthright follow-up program, in which

Birthright alumni host Shabbat meals for their peers on college campuses, with the goal of making Jewish life more vibrant, inclusive and accessible on campuses across North America.

But instead of celebrating these accomplishments, Haaretz chooses to criticize them—solely because they are “Orthodox.” Sadly, the Haaretz attitude robs the broader community of the energy, the dynamism, the talent and the commitment that the Orthodox community brings to the entirety of the Jewish people.

Each year, tens of thousands of young people participate in a broad array of OU programs designed to engage non-observant Jewish youth and collegiates with Jewish pride and incorporate Jewish values in their lives.

Each year, we spend tens of millions of dollars on NCSY, the Heshe and Harriet Seif Jewish Learning Initiative on Campus (OU-JLIC), Yachad/The National Jewish Council for Disabilities and Israel Free Spirit programming focused outside the Orthodox community.

And we in the Orthodox community are uniquely well-suited to carry out this critical responsibility. As I’ve written previously: The . . . Orthodox community is positioned and uniquely prepared to engage with our less observant coreligionists. This vast majority of us have been privileged to receive an outstanding yeshivah education. We are Jewishly literate. And we are secularly literate.

We are Jewishly committed, and our commitment is genuine and contagious.

And we take this passion for our fellow Jew as well as this wealth of education, talent and skill, and we infuse it into the world of Jewish education and communal life. We are not embarrassed by this commitment to our fellow Jews; we celebrate it.

Our goal is to reach those whose link with their Jewish identity and with Israel has been broken or severely diminished— to cultivate and renew feelings of pride and connection, based on tradition, Jewish values and the eternal wisdom of our sages. This goal thrives on unity, not on divisive rhetoric.

Spring 5778/2018 JEWISH ACTION

15

CHAIRMAN’S MESSAGE

By Gerald M. Schreck

I

f only raising kids were like baking a cake. Pour two cups of discipline plus 3 1/2 cups of steady love and encouragement; stir gently. Mix in a helping of communication and validation. Slowly add half a pound of religious training and inspiration, and let it simmer for roughly eighteen years. Let cool, and there you have it: a confident, capable and emotionally and spiritually healthy young adult.

Unfortunately, there is no simple recipe for raising children.

There are, in fact, so many ingredients that go into effective parenting, it’s almost a miracle new parents don’t get frightened off by the very prospect of raising children. As parents we need to be compassionate—but not overly compassionate; we need to be firm disciplinarians but not too firm. We need to be selfless, emotionally available and good listeners.

On top of all that, we need to be religious role models. As the well-known Torah lecturer and educator Shira Smiles states in this issue’s cover story on parenting, raising genuinely religious children requires extensive and ongoing effort. Relegating our children’s entire religious education to schools and 16

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educators in a colossal mistake. Parents, she maintains, must take religion seriously and not succumb to complacency in their own religious lives. “Children need to witness their parents’ passion for Yiddishkeit.”

Another significant challenge for parents especially in this age of distraction is time—or more accurately, the lack of it. With many Orthodox families relying on dual incomes to contend with the high cost of frum life, time has become a rare commodity in the average frum home. Oftentimes, working parents feel like they are in a race against the clock: dash home from work, get homework, supper and bath time over, get kids into bed, prepare lunches and snacks for the following day; clean up and get some rest. Repeat.

It’s an exhausting cycle and yet, despite the breakneck speed of their lifestyles, mothers and fathers cannot afford to be distracted and parent mindlessly.

They need to be laser-focused on their children or else they may risk missing some red flags. Are their children having difficulty academically? What about socially? Are they davening the way they should?

If parents are not attuned to their own children, who will be?

Then there is the ever-present challenge of technology. I’m not referring to the need to teach our children digital responsibility, which is, of course, a given. I’m referring to digital responsibility which parents must exercise themselves. All of us need to be wary of the addictive nature of technology and its insidious tendency to rob of us of the little family time we have. We need to make a conscious effort to put the smartphones away during dinnertime and keep them away until our children are fast asleep.

I am no parenting expert and cannot claim to have read the popular parenting bibles that are on the current bestseller list. And, truthfully, my wife

Barbara and I brought up children in the pre-smartphone era. Our children are grown and we are, baruch Hashem, proud grandparents. I can only humbly share with you what has worked for us. One of the best pieces of parenting advice I ever received was this: spend a few minutes of good quality time with each child each day. While I confess that on many days, I failed to achieve this goal—especially during the years I worked long hours and came home when our children were already in bed—nevertheless, setting this as our target helped us prioritize our time differently. We knew that each child needed “talking time”—and factored that into each week, if not into each day.

Now that we are grandparents, we consciously try to spend “talking time” with each of our grandchildren as well. We have, over the years, learned to maximize the family time Shabbos offers and to use the Shabbos table as an opportunity to speak to our children, and more importantly, to listen to them. You will never regret the hours you spend getting to know your children—and in your later years—your grandchildren.

No, there is no foolproof recipe for raising menschlich, well-rounded young adults imbued with yiras Shamayim.

But perhaps that’s a good thing. Children are unpredictable and individualistic. No two are exactly alike, and thus, our approach to each child must be customized. There is no mold, no one-size-fits-all formula. So yes, while unconditional love, encouragement and attention are essential in raising children, as the contributors in this issue repeatedly remind us, praying for siyata d’Shmaya is the one critical ingredient that should never be omitted.

Gerald M. Schreck is chairman of the Jewish Action Committee and vice chairman of the OU Board of Governors.

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PERSONAL HISTORY

A CHAPLAIN’S TALE DURING THE KOREAN WAR

By Chaim Feuerman z”l, as told to Ruchama Feuerman

A

t age twenty-four, I served for two years (from 1953 to 1955) on active duty as a Jewish chaplain in the United States Air Force. There was a war going on in Korea, and the United States Army was requesting volunteers. The National Jewish Welfare Board put pressure on the yeshivot, and so I was “volunteered.” Before I joined though, I spent a year studying fulltime at Yeshiva Rabbi Chaim Berlin in Brooklyn, New York, under the tutelage of Rav Yitzchok Hutner, zt”l.

Volunteers had a choice of serving in the United States Army, Navy, Marines or Air Force. I chose the Air Force and was assigned to the Air Training Command at Lackland Air Force Base in San Antonio, Texas.

Rav Hutner wasn’t too concerned about my joining the Air Force. He brushed it off, like it was some kind of initiation into a fraternity. Okay, so you’ll be there for two years. You’ll get in and get out. You’ll go and you’ll come back.

It didn’t feel that way when I first arrived.

On my first day of active duty, an officer inducted me and then accompanied me into a building. I was wearing my Air Force cap. He said, “Take it off.” A military man wasn’t allowed to wear a cap indoors. I didn’t know it, but if you wore a yarmulke,

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you would be considered officially “out of uniform” and subject to a citation and severe penalties. The same was true of facial hair.

I said, “Do you mean—take it off and then put on my yarmulke?”

He barked, “No! Off!” I obeyed because I had no choice, but afterward I spoke to Rav Hutner about it. “What do I do?”

He said, “You have to take off your yarmulke, and see to it that in your heart things are the way they should be. Don’t worry about the externals right now.”

I wasn’t completely at ease with that, but Rav Hutner said it, so I did it. By this point, he had assumed the stature of a father in my eyes, a spiritual father. People have no idea what it was like in those days, how profoundly students were connected to their roshei yeshivah. Our generation had been completely orphaned. Many like myself had Galician parents who were traditional but didn’t have much of a Jewish education and certainly didn’t have the tools to help us succeed in the world of learning [Torah]. Zero.

Along came Rav Hutner, a towering personality, a gigantic soul, handsome and dashing, unbelievably well-spoken in many languages, a wise man who was street smart and savvy and had received the luminous wisdom from the Alter of Slabodka. To us, he

was like Moshe Rabbeinu. He was everything to me.

Throughout my time in the military, I experienced many conflicts between my service and my Torah observance. Praying with a minyan was impossible. Shabbat davening itself was challenging. You weren’t free to do whatever you wanted. Even though I had enormous latitude as an officer, I was still subject to the Air Force’s regulations.

Rav Hutner told me, “Whenever there is a halachah that you cannot keep, you should learn the laws that pertain to the mitzvah you can’t observe.” The rationale behind that was simple.

Every mitzvah has four components: lilmod, l’lamed, lishmor v’la’asot—to study, to teach, to guard and to do. So if you can’t perform “la’asot” (to do), at least be sure to peform the other three.

That first day I received the requisite crew cut and uniform. No gun, because chaplains weren’t allowed to carry guns. But later, when I attended an officers’ basic military school, they taught us how to march, and proper military protocol.

Ruchama Feuerman is a novelist. The Rebbetzin’s Courtyard, the short story sequel to her last novel, In the Courtyard of the Kabbalist, was recently published.

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Captain Chaim Feuerman shaking the lulav and etrog in the sukkah on Lackland Air Force Base, September 29, 1953. Photos courtesy of Ruchama Feuerman

Most of the chaplains were in their mid-forties or fifties. I was a very young chaplain, just twenty-three.

My trainees were much younger— seventeen. These boys, fresh off the farms of Iowa, Wisconsin, Minnesota and Mississippi, saw the military as an opportunity to get out from behind the pigs, the goats and the cows and expand their horizons.

When the trainees first landed on the base, their heads were shaved right away; they were then sent to the showers and stuck into loose-fitting dungarees—fatigues. No snappy uniforms for them yet.

The next stop on the assembly line was the chapel. The boys now had to hear an inspirational talk from a chaplain, any chaplain, be it a reverend, priest, rabbi or imam—it was all the same to the military. My assignment was to tell them to be good boys, to stay away from drinking and nonsense. (Drugs weren’t a problem in those days.) It didn’t matter that my “congregants” weren’t Jewish. My job 20

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was to serve the spiritual needs of all faiths—to encourage the men to be patriotic, honest, “brave, courageous and bold.”

Many of the Christian chaplains gave very long and tedious “derashot.” To their thinking, they finally had a captive audience—a chapel full of people—and they weren’t going to let these boys go so quickly. Their long sermons would then hold up the next group of inductees waiting to get into the chapel.

This put the chaplains in conflict with the barbers, who wanted the assembly line to move quickly—they were paid by the head.

One barber was named Benno F. Wotipka. We became friends, good ole Benno and I. I would ask him, “Benno, what do you want? The sixty-second special or the two-hour special?” Sometimes it was to his advantage if my sermon went more slowly. Whatever he said, I would do. Because I didn’t really care if the men listened to my derashah. All I knew was, I had to say a derashah.

I did the same thing with the guys who issued the uniforms—I kept the line moving. They probably were also paid by the uniform. I was very popular with everyone in that unit.

It was fun. I had a grand time. Well, most of the time.

Every now and then, I’d be overcome with an intense longing for home and my yeshivah, especially soon after I first arrived. One day I was walking along the base moping, missing my family. Ahead of me, a platoon of airmen was strewn helter-skelter on the grass; the men were catching their breath after an exercise or a march. All I did was walk by, despondent with my head down, when the sergeant gave a full-throated yell: “Plato-oo-n!!” At that instant, these exhausted trainees all leapt to their feet, saluted crisply, and chimed in unison: “Good morning, sir!” They stood there and waited. I looked at them like they were crazy. Was I supposed to do something in return? Somehow I intuitively raised a feeble hand to my right eyebrow. The sergeant in charge of the platoon snapped, “At ease!” whereupon all the men plopped back onto the grass.

Did their salutes lift my mood? No. It wasn’t personal, just the protocol toward officers, as I learned soon enough. Whenever I happened to walk by, those in uniform leapt to their feet, saluted me and stood at attention.

Another “benefit” of being an officer—I was allowed to have separate rations, so I could buy and eat whatever I wanted. But it wasn’t easy to get ahold of kosher food in San Antonio, Texas in 1953. Where would I get tuna fish that was kosher? StarKist didn’t yet have an OU. So what did I do? I ate candy.

Chocolate candy bars. For two years. They eroded my teeth, and I had a mouthful of cavities. Of course I could’ve eaten fruits and vegetables.

But where was I going to get fruit on an Air Force base? It would involve going into town in a car. As an officer, I used a motor scooter, but it wasn’t so simple to travel thirty miles on a motor scooter. Texas is spread out. The only food readily available on the base was

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candy bars. I lost a lot of weight because I didn’t eat much.

In retrospect those bars were probably treif, laden with questionable ingredients, but at the time we thought they were kosher.

There was another dimension to my job. On Sunday mornings we conducted a special prayer service for the few Jewish men on base—maybe twentyfive people at most. Afterward we ate bagels and lox, which was a lucky break for me. These men were not the basic trainees but cadets training to be pilots.

Come September and October, I knew I’d have to take time off from my more mundane weekday chaplaincy duties to observe Rosh Hashanah, Yom Kippur, Sukkot, Shemini Atzeret and Simchat Torah. Seven days off from work within the same thirty-day period was a bit much to expect my non-Jewish fellow officers, airmen and chaplains to accept graciously. And so, to forestall potential resentment among my peers, I came up with a plan. When Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year’s Day rolled around, I would wait for someone to be assigned chaplain duty. Then I would approach that individual and let him know that he could enjoy his holiday because I would assume his duties. I did that for every possible holiday or quasi-holiday: Election Day, Columbus Day, Mother’s Day and Father’s Day. It worked.

One time, though, Christmas fell on a Shabbat. Now I had a dilemma. I didn’t want the duty chaplain to miss out on his holiday, but I certainly did not want to desecrate Shabbat. I hit on an idea. The base headquarters contained a cot. I could sleep there on Shabbat.

This way, the sergeant on duty could reach me without the use of a telephone and I could walk to take care of any emergencies which might arise on base. It was a restful Shabbat.

By the way, from Thanksgiving through New Year’s Day, the base’s loud-speaker continuously blared Christmas carols in honor of the season and in order to bring good cheer to the troops. Many of the airmen, even though they were Christian, soon tired of hearing the carols over and over again. They wanted to complain 22

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to the base commander but did not have the courage to do so. Then they came up with what they thought was a marvelous idea. They figured the Jewish chaplain (me) must be at least as tired as they were of hearing those Christmas carols. They sent a delegation to me. “Could you ask the base commander to cut down on all those Christmas carols?”

Sure, I thought. And be the Jew/ Grinch who stole Christmas? Without missing a beat, I said, “Not on your life!”

At one point, the Christian chaplains wanted to build a baptistery on the base—a sunken receptacle where you baptize people. After I looked at the plans and dimensions, I realized the baptistery could also serve as a kosher

Rav Hutner wasn’t too concerned about my joining the Air Force. Okay, so you’ll be there for two years. You’ll get in and get out. You’ll go and you’ll come back.

mikvah. I could use it for immersing vessels (tevilah), for conversions (which were rare) or for immersing before Yom Kippur.

I asked Rav Hutner if I could use it.

He told me I could, because the baptistery was owned by the US government, which is committed to the separation of church and state.

I wanted to make sure from the outset that the baptistery would be kosher by ensuring that there would be “mayim chayim”—living waters. So I said to the engineer, “I’d like to first fill the baptistery with ice from a river and let it melt.”

The engineer drawled, “Raaabbi, you can fill that thing with beer, for all I care.”

Then I told the Christian chaplains what I wanted to do. I even wrote about it in the Air Force newsletter. I don’t

think the Baptists were thrilled about sharing the baptistery with the Jews, though, because shortly thereafter the project was abandoned. *** One day I got a call from a Reform rabbi who led a synagogue in San Antonio.

“Howard?” Rabbi Jacobson said. “I have a man out here who is in need of spiritual guidance.”

“Okay, what’s the problem?” I asked.

He said, “Well there’s a buck private keeping kosher in the army.”

I said, “So what’s the problem?”

The Reform Rabbi Jacobson seemed upset. He tried to explain. “He’s keeping kosher and it’s very difficult. I want to send him over to you to straighten him out.”

I scratched my head. Why would a Reform rabbi of a synagogue who had nothing to do with the military bother calling me about this?

A little backstory is necessary.

Rabbi Jacobson shared a backyard with his neighbor, General Shambora, a four-star general. Let me explain the hierarchy in the military. At the very bottom of the ranks is a buck private— no stripes on his sleeves. All the way at the top, right beneath the president of the United States—who is the commanding officer of all forces—is the four-star general. So a four-star general was pretty close to “God.” General Shambora was in command of the Fourth Army area, which included Texas, Oklahoma and quite a few other states—a whole chunk of America.

A certain Yossi Itzkowitz—the buck private—was eating kosher in the mess hall, which meant he was hardly eating anything—sometimes fruits, if they served an apple, pear or orange. His captain noticed that he wasn’t eating.

“What’s this about?” he asked.

“I’m Jewish, I’m Orthodox. I keep kosher,” Yossi explained.

His captain knew Yossi was a good soldier, so following proper army procedure, he put in a request to a major for Yossi to obtain separate rations. This was something that normally only an officer would receive.

When the major received the request for separate rations, he couldn’t make heads or tails of it. Separate rations

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23

Left: Captain Feuerman preparing to daven, August 1953. Right: Captain Feuerman in uniform on his Air Force scooter, August 1953.

for a buck private? What was that about? Maybe the private was a senator’s son or nephew. He didn’t know what to do, so he sent it up to a lieutenant colonel, who didn’t know what to do with it, and it kept getting sent up the ranks all the way to the four-star general. When General Shambora received the request, he became afraid. Maybe this was a president’s grandkid! What on earth was he going to do? Then he remembered his nextdoor-neighbor. Rabbi Jacobson. He’d know what to do. General Shambora called up Rabbi Jacobson, and Rabbi Jacobson called me.

Rabbi Jacobson and I had a frustrating conversation, and it ended with, “Howard, will you have a look at him?”

I said, “Sure, why not?”

So they stuck the buck private, a Torah Vodaath yeshivah bachur, in a staff car reserved for high-ranking officers. The driver was a corporal. He drove Yossi from Fort Sam Houston all the way to the other side of San Antonio to have a “spiritual guidance interview” as it was called, with a Howard Feuerman.

I looked at Yossi and said, “What happened?”

He said, “I’m keeping kosher, and my captain put in a request for me to get separate rations.”

I said, “What will you do if you don’t get the separate rations?”

He shrugged. “I’ll just keep doing 24

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what I’m doing. I’ll eat grapes, pears, bananas and oranges when I get them.”

“Are you a good soldier?” I asked him.

“Yes, I’m a very good soldier.”

“What do you do on GI Party Night?”

I wanted to know. That’s when everyone cleaned up the barracks Friday night for inspection on Saturday morning.

Inspection was a big deal. Officers went around with white gloves and checked if there was dust on the shelves. They even checked the toothpaste tubes, making sure nobody had squeezed from the top, and that there were no soap bubbles in the soap dishes. It had to be spit spot. Of course, to clean the barracks on Shabbat was a distasteful task for any frum Jew. I wanted to know how Yossi handled it.

He said, “It’s Shabbat, what can I do?”

“But after Shabbat,” I persisted, “what do you?”

He replied, “I make sure to do other work that will make up for the fact that I wasn’t at the GI party.”

Yossi Itzkowitz sounded legit. So I sent him back to his army post in the staff car.

Now I had to deal with Rabbi Jacobson. I said, “This young man is legit. If he gets separate rations, he’ll be grateful. If he doesn’t, he’ll just continue with what he’s doing.”

Rabbi Jacobson relayed this report to General Shambora, and that’s how a four-star general gave a buck private from Torah Vodaath separate rations for kosher reasons.

Thirty years later, in the 1980s, I was

sitting in a shtiebel on the corner of 70th Road and Main Street in Queens.

I saw a man praying in the minyan who looked dimly familiar. He looked at me, and I looked at him. I walked over.

“Are you Yossi Itzkowitz?”

“Yeah.”

“I’m Howard.”

He understood right away. We were very happy to see each other. And we’ve been buddies ever since.

Once, we reminisced about how I had brought him a sandwich when he was on bivouac—that’s when you go out in the field and simulate war conditions.

In such a situation he didn’t have access to separate rations. He couldn’t starve, so I contacted a friend of mine who lived in town—his wife made him the sandwich and I delivered it.

In the mud, even in those fatigues out in the field, Yossi looked like a Torah Vodaath yeshivah bachur. *** When I had initially packed for my service, I had taken along parchment, quill and ink with the idea that in my down time I would practice to become a sofer, a scribe. As an officer, I did have leisure time, and so I would take out my quill, ink and parchment and practice writing the Purim megillah, the Book of Esther. A megillah is actually the book that all scribes use to learn to become a sofer, because God’s name doesn’t appear in it, and therefore a beginner scribe won’t be desecrating Hashem’s name if he makes a mistake.

Every now and then I was able to take a few days leave to go home, as long as it didn’t interfere with my chaplain duties. One of the best ways to get anywhere in the US was to hitch a ride on an Air Force plane that was going in your direction. If there was room, you could hop on. Hitchhiking, they called it. You needed a place to land, though, and there were no Air Force bases in New York. The closest Air Force base was in Springfield, Massachusetts, which I figured was close enough, and from there I’d get a ride somehow to New York.

En route, as we were flying over Brooklyn, I joked with the pilots on the plane, “Could I bail out over Brooklyn?” which was an impossibility, I knew.

I was allowed to have separate rations, so I could buy and eat whatever I wanted. But it wasn’t easy to get ahold of kosher food in San Antonio, Texas in 1953.

There was no place for the plane to land. They joked back, “Chaplain, if you sign out for the parachute, that’s all we care about.” To their thinking, as long as someone was responsible for the government property—the parachute—I could go kill myself, as long as I signed out.

There actually was an Air Force base in New York—a very tiny one called Mitchell Field, which is now the site of the Hebrew Academy of Nassau

County. We were flying over Mitchell Field, not scheduled to land, when out of nowhere we were hit with a cloud burst and a very intense storm.

Pilots normally fly around a storm, or over or under it, but this time they couldn’t. They had to make a forced, unscheduled landing.

As soon as we hit the ground, the storm stopped. The pilots opened the door to let me out. They said, “Chaplain, you must live right,” and they flew off.

From Mitchell Field I took a very short taxi ride to the Bronx. It was my first trip home. My mother was horror-stricken when she saw me. I was gaunt from eating mostly candy bars.

In my buzz cut, I looked like a zombie, absolutely frightening to my mother. I imagine she tried to fatten me up, but there was only so much she could accomplish in a few days.

I took another leave for Purim. I went to Yeshiva Rabbi Chaim Berlin in my uniform—it was classy, you

know—and brought my Purim megillah with me. I showed Rav Hutner what I had done in the Air Force, and he examined it. The megillah I had written was kosher, but not considered mehudar—not the ideal, best kind of megillah. Therefore it couldn’t be used by the cantor on Purim. Rav Hutner looked up at me and said, “Chaim, I want to fulfill the mitzvah of hearing the megillah by following along with your megillah.”

Throughout the reading of Megillat Esther, I stood next to Rav Hutner in my Air Force uniform, with Rav Hutner holding my megillah and carefully following each word.

It was a great moment. I had written and practiced to become a scribe so I wouldn’t waste my time on nonsense, and here was my rav, whom I loved like a father, using this megillah.

And thus I served two years in the Air Force, and then came back and went on with the rest of my life, just like Rav Hutner had said.

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The Rav presents an evening of Torah study in Lamport Auditorium at Yeshiva University in memory of the Rav's wife, Mrs. Tonya Soloveitchik and his brother Dr. Samuel Soloveichik, March 9, 1969.

Courtesy of the Yeshiva University Archives 26

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IN TRIBUTE

IN COMMEMORATION OF THE RAV’S TWENTY-FIFTH YAHRTZEIT

The Posthumous Life of Rabbi Joseph B. Soloveitchik

By Hillel Goldberg

T

he posthumous life of a great Talmudist and philosopher invariably undergoes transformations. Among the transformations of Rabbi Joseph B. Soloveitchik’s posthumous life are these: an astonishing expansion of his written oeuvre; a softening of his image among many so-called right-wing circles of Orthodoxy; a calcification of his image among many so-called

modern circles of Orthodoxy; a sharp disagreement over his stance on Zionism; and what I would call a naïve attribution to him of inconsistency based on a blindness to his common sense, wise and inevitably varied response to individual disciples.

Surpassing all these are the astonishing dimensions of a continuing influence that would not have been predicted even the basis of his considerable

Rabbi Hillel Goldberg, PhD, is the author of Between Berlin and Slobodka: Jewish Transition Figures from Eastern Europe (New Jersey, 1989), which included a synoptic biography of Rabbi Joseph B. Soloveitchik.

influence during his lifetime.

1. One who has come to study the Rav’s writings since his death would never guess that during his lifetime it was often noted that his influence stemmed from his classroom lectures, not from his published writings, which were accurately deemed sparse. In one of the earliest analyses of the Rav, the late Professor Eugene Borowitz observed that it was necessary for a critic to present Rabbi Soloveitchik’s ideas to the public since they were shared orally, available only to his students. The enormous number of published volumes of the Rav’s Talmudic lectures and philosophical Spring 5778/2018 JEWISH ACTION

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and homiletical writings since his death, not to mention the critical studies of the Rav’s thought, stand in dramatic contrast to his literary legacy during his lifetime.

2. The opposition to the Rav in right-wing Orthodox circles during his lifetime was sharp and often personal, based primarily on his embrace of the study of Western philosophy and of the institution, Yeshiva University, that validated this type of study.

Much of that opposition has declined, as those most opposed to the Rav have themselves died; as the brilliant Talmudic expositions of the Rav have attained wide circulation; and as the gap between many of the rabbinic graduates of YU and of right-wing yeshivot has narrowed.

3. The Rav, who never called himself a “Modern Orthodox Jew” and rarely, if ever, used the term, has been reframed as the father of “Modern Orthodoxy.”

In fact, the Rav’s vision was much more spiritual than sociological, and much more universal than particular. He saw his study of Western philosophy as enabling him to address the existential issues facing all Jews, and indeed humanity, not just one group of Jews.

4. Was the Rav a Zionist? And if so, a “messianic” Zionist or a “pragmatic” Zionist? That is, was the founding of the State of Israel a Divine step portending an immediate, ultimate redemption, or a pragmatic, political and beneficial reality for a persecuted people? The answers among disciples vary widely. Here, we reach the recasting of the Rav as an eternally confident, oracular authority, when he was, in fact, sometimes uncertain, and always sensitive to recalcitrant, shifting realities in both society and the individuals who sought his guidance. Which leads to this: 5. It is unrealistic to expect that a large number of disciples and attendees of his Talmudic lectures would be capable of hearing the Rav in the same way. Individual disciples brought their own perceptions, abilities and limitations to their interactions with the Rav. Yet, we often hear since the Rav’s death, and often in strident terms, that it is “I”—in other words, one person— who has the “real” reading of the Rav’s 28

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Photo: Joel Orent

thoughts on everything from Zionism to secular studies to women’s Torah study to the appropriate curriculum for day schools to the political agenda of the Orthodox community. “I have the real Rav,” to the exclusion of other people’s Rav, it is often heard. In fact, the Rav’s subtleties were more than could be absorbed by most disciples.

When contrary claims are made as to the Rav’s “real” position on a given issue, the cause is less likely some deep fissure in the Rav’s thinking than in his recognition that he could communicate only so much to a given disciple.

Above all these matters, what strikes me most about the Rav’s legacy is how deeply he has penetrated the lives and minds of so many people, both those

who knew him and those who did not.

While it is true that his lectures were well attended, the number of people who have gained from the Rav since his death dwarf the number of people who knew him from shiur or from Boston. This lonely man of faith has created an enormous, informal community of students that would, I suspect, surprise even him. From New York to Zurich, from Jerusalem to Santa Fe, from English readers to readers in Hebrew, Spanish and many other languages, the name “Rabbi Joseph B. Soloveitchik” needs no introduction. The current signs indicate that the impact of this gadol baTorah will only continue to grow.

how are great lineages made?

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Observing the Rav

By Seth Mandel

S

eeing the Rav in Boston was quite a different experience from seeing him in New York.

When the Rav was in New York, his schedule was relentless—he was working all the time. As soon as he finished giving a shiur at Yeshiva University, he would have a bite to eat in his Washington Heights apartment and then spend several hours meeting with an endless stream of visitors.

Later in the evening, he would deliver a shiur at the Moriah Synagogue on Manhattan’s Upper West Side, attend other events when necessary, and prepare for the shiur he was to deliver at YU the following day. In Boston, however, his schedule was more relaxed. Although there certainly were individuals who traveled to Boston to consult with the Rav, he was able to spend most of the time with his family, and on Shabbat, with friends and acquaintances from the Brookline community.

In the late sixties, when I was in my teens, I attended a shiur by the Rav and it opened my eyes. I decided that I would learn whatever I could from the Rav. I wanted to observe him up close and absorb all that I could. After I started attending the Maimonides Minyan on Shabbat, I noticed that people would walk the Rav home from the minyan to his daughter and sonin-law’s home. (After his wife passed away, the Rav moved into the Twersky

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The Rav being mesader kiddushin at the author’s wedding, October 23, 1979. To the Rav’s left and right are the eidei kiddushin, the “witnesses for the kiddushin” (halachic act of engagement), and facing the Rav is the author. For the kiddushin to be valid, the groom must give the bride something of value that he owns. Above, the Rav can be seen holding the ring. He had just shown the ring to the eidim so they could testify that it was a gold ring. He is now proceeding to establish for the witnesses that the groom owned the ring. Everyone is grinning because it was quite entertaining to hear the Rav cross-examine the groom about how he came into possession of the ring, whom he acquired it from, and whether it was paid for by cash or check. Courtesy of Rabbi Seth Mandel

Rabbi Dr. Seth Mandel is a rabbinic coordinator at OU Kosher. He has a PhD in Semitic languages from Harvard University and has taught Hebrew, Aramaic, linguistics and psycholinguistics, and other subjects in various universities.

The Rav spoke about some of his ancestors as being great men, but he referred to himself as a melamed, a simple teacher. home.) Because it was a long walk uphill to the Twersky home, most people accompanied the Rav only part of the way. I asked Abraham Levovitz, the Rav’s loyal friend and follower (who was later to serve as principal of Maimonides School) whether it would be possible for me to tag along on these walks. Mr. Levovitz indicated that in light of the Rav’s age (he was in his sixties at that point) and the fact that no one else accompanied him the entire way home,

it would be appropriate for me to do so. And so every Shabbat, for years, I had the zechut to walk several miles from shul to the Rav’s home (and then back to my home) for the pleasure of accompanying and listening to the Rav. **************** There was no official seudah shelishit at the Maimonides Minyan—most congregants went home to eat the meal; however, the Rav and a few others remained in shul. Invariably, people

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would crowd around the Rav and pepper him with halachic questions— some were fairly good; others were pretty basic. But the Rav treated each question seriously and respectfully.

Sometimes when responding to a question, he would tell a relevant story.

His stories were different too—they were never hagiographic. In Lithuania, the rabbis did not generally tell hagiographical stories. But the subjects of the Rav’s stories were relatively limited. It was the minhag of the Soloveitchik family to never tell a story unless they were absolutely certain it was true, so most of the Rav’s stories did not go any further back than the time of Rabbi Akiva Eiger (mid-eighteenth century to early-nineteenth century).

The few older stories the family did tell centered on the Vilna Gaon and had been passed down from Rabbi Chaim of Volozhin, so their authenticity was unquestionable. Very impressive stories the Rav would tell, but only if they were germane to the topic at hand.

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The Rav didn’t care for externals; it was irrelevant if you wore rabbinic or other garb, what position you held or what your socioeconomic status was.

For he Rav, the biggest compliment he could give anyone was, “er ken lernen,” which meant the individual knew how to learn Gemara well.

Rabbanim who held prestigious positions would often visit the Rav and he would greet everyone respectfully, but when he deeply admired an individual, it was not because of the position he or she held. He would often quote Pirkei Avot 4:20: “Rebbi omer, ‘Al tistakel b’kankan, ela b’mah sheyesh bo. Yesh kankan chadash malei yashan, v’yashan she’afilu chadash ein bo’—Rebbi says, ‘Do not look at the jug, but rather what is in it. For there are new jugs full of old, and old [jugs] that do not have even new within them.’”

One of the Rav’s most striking traits was his humility. The Rav always dressed in a dignified manner, but eschewed clothing that might identify him as a rabbi. Everyone who had heard about the Rav was aware that he possessed a breadth and depth of knowledge about a broad range of subjects that was rare; yet the Rav did not view himself this way. The Rav spoke about some of his ancestors as being great men, but he referred to himself as a melamed, a simple teacher.

He never perceived himself as being in the same league as some of the illustrious rabbanim he knew.

Many times when I would walk home with him, I would listen to people around him discussing various she’eilot. Sometimes the questioner did not necessarily want a pesak; he merely wanted the Rav’s input on a particular topic.

When a group of feminists visited him and demanded that he permit them to wear tallitot, he listened to them, showed he understood their reasoning, and proposed that there first be a trial period during which they would wear colored cloaks as tallitot, but without tzitzit and without reciting a berachah.

He asked them to note how they feel wearing them and to come back after two weeks and confer with him again.

After two weeks, they reconvened, and 32

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when the Rav asked these women how they felt, they told him how inspired they felt when wearing the cloaks. The Rav replied that that was excellent, that they should definitely continue wearing the cloaks and praying with kavanah, and that there was no need to wear the tallitot with tzitzit that men wore. Most of the women accepted this response, because the Rav treated their question with genuine respect and listened to their grievances.

The Rav understood the complexities of Halachah, and it was instructive to see how he would respond to two very similar questions. Unless the question was a simple, factual one, the Rav’s answer to questions that appeared alike would rarely be the same.

Reflecting on the different pesakim I heard him deliver over the years, it was clear to me that the Rav took into account a multitude of factors before arriving at a conclusion. He would try to understand who the individual was—how committed he or she was religiously, and how his response would be understood by the questioner and by those around him. There are many different factors that can affect a pesak, and so a thoughtful rav explains the halachah not necessarily by quoting the precise siman in Shulchan Aruch upon which he based the ruling, but by simplifying or elaborating on the relevant halachic concepts, emphasizing this or that aspect, and discussing other circumstances that would affect the pesak and might lead to a different ruling. Listening to the Rav explain a pesak was a valuable lesson in and of itself.

I was studying languages in the Near Eastern Civilizations Department at a local university, and was taking courses not only in ancient Semitic languages but in archeology as well. Occasionally I came to the Rav with a question concerning an archeological discovery and how it related to something that Chazal said. The Rav never dismissed such questions, but would discuss them and suggest several different possible explanations. To me, it was worth taking an archeology course just to see how the Rav approached it, and how he emphasized that the simplest answer

one might think of was not necessarily the correct one. **************** The Rav was exquisitely sensitive to others; his derech eretz was apparent.

The Rav and his wife employed an Irish Catholic housekeeper for many years.

When she retired, they continued to pay her a weekly stipend for the rest of her life because “it was the right thing to do.”

It was not uncommon for Israeli politicians to visit with the Rav, and not only from Mafdal, the National Religious Party. Secular Israeli politicians came as well. On one occasion, after a certain politician visited with the Rav, someone a sked him about his impressions of the Torah giant. The politician responded that he had never met someone who could make a simple question so complicated. On another occasion, we asked the Rav what he discussed with a another politician.

He didn’t disclose the particular matter (which he felt was confidential), but he did tell us that he had told the politician, a secular Jew, how Adam HaRishon had faced a similar quandary.

He then proceeded to tell the politician all about the midrash and what it could teach him about his predicament.

The Rav believed in the infinite power of Torah to change people’s lives. As the Rambam explains in Hilchot Teshuvah, both the Written and the Oral Torah are Divine gifts from Hakadosh Baruch Hu to the Jews. Therefore, talking and thinking about Torah, as well as observing the mitzvot, are ways to bring the Divine into our daily lives.

Even if an individual was completely secular, the Rav would introduce a bit of Torah into the conversation in a subtle fashion. He wanted to plant a seed of Torah in the person’s mind, and, he felt, Hakadosh Baruch Hu would see whether or not it would take root. **************** If one observed the Rav when he was in shul, it was clear that he was reviewing the halachot in his mind as he performed the various rituals.

Sometimes someone would ask him a question related to tefillah or to a shul practice, and from his answer one could

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tell he had been reviewing these halachot only minutes earlier.

It once happened that my mother washed my tallit katan with other items and it turned a light shade of green. I turned to Rabbi Yitzchok Simon, zt”l, after davening, showed him the discolored tzitzit and asked if it was a problem. He said, “Why don’t we ask the Rav?” So we went over to the Rav, who took the opportunity to launch into a discussion of the Rambam regarding the color of tzitzit. This was exactly what Rabbi Simon had hoped would happen, and he grinned as he said to me, “Now you have your answer.” It was clear to both of us that the Rav must have just recently reviewed the Rambam before we asked him, probably when he was putting on his tallit. (The Rav had learned the Rambam by heart when he was young, and could retrieve it from memory anytime he wanted.) If you observed the Rav carefully, you could sometimes see him pause before putting on tefillin or saying part of the davening, and it was clear that he was reviewing in his mind the Torah concepts behind what he was doing.

This is what the Rambam meant by the term “oved me’ahavah”—someone who is so much in love with Hakadosh Baruch Hu and His Torah that he cannot help thinking about it all the time (Hilchot Teshuvah 10:2-3). At a shiur the Rav once gave, he discussed how people are mistaken when they think that the Rambam was a dry jurist listing all the rules. The Rav pointed out places where the Rambam makes remarks showing that he, in the Rav’s words, was “intoxicated with the love of Hakadosh Baruch Hu,” and in his quest to get as close as he could to the Object of his love, the Rambam would think constantly about God and His mitzvot, no matter what he was doing.

The Rav may as well have been talking about himself.

I attended the Rav’s shiurim for many years and learned a lot. But I learned perhaps even more, simply by observing the Rav: I learned what it means to be a good person, to be a good Jew, and to serve God completely and wholeheartedly. I am forever grateful to God for having been given the opportunity.

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The Rav and the Brisker Derech: A Unique Method

By Menacham Genack

P

iety, faith and spirituality are terms not often associated with analytical precision or intellectual rigor. Experience and intellect are each thought to inhabit their own separate realms. For the Rav, however, the path to the ultimate religious experience, the rendezvous with the Almighty to which he often referred, was paved with rigorous, sophisticated and intensely cerebral Torah study. For the Rav, the intellectual and the experiential merged, and it was impossible to tell where one ended and the other began.

The Rav’s derech halimud, his method of Torah study, was of course the Brisker derech that he inherited from his grandfather, Rav Chaim of Brisk. It is hard to overstate the c reative genius of Rav Chaim and the impact of the revolutionary system of analysis he developed. Let me address some of the philosophical underpinnings of the Brisker derech and its theological corollaries.

The essence of the Brisker derech approach is to view Talmudic discussions and debates through the prism of logical constructs and categories rather than common sense concepts. For example, one of the compelling ideas of Rav Chaim, which was developed by the Rav, involves shtarot, halachic

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documents. According to Rav Chaim, the legal power of the shtar goes well beyond any common sense, practical notion of a shtar’s legal force. There is a halachic principle that if one possesses a shtar which attests that another person owes him money, the other person is precluded from denying the claim because of an umdena, a presumption, called shtarcha b’yadi mai ba’i, “What is your shtar doing in my hands?” In other words, there is a presumption that if the debtor had already paid the loan referred to in the shtar, then the creditor would no longer be in possession of the shtar evidencing the debt. But, contended Rav Chaim, if the existence of the shtar merely gives rise to a presumption, a mere common sense inference from the facts that leads to a reasonable legal conclusion, what creates the halachic obligation that the debtor swear that he does not owe the debt? Instead, Rav Chaim explained, the shtar must be considered to constitute actual testimony that the loan was not paid, even though the legal force of the shtar is based only on an umdena. The Rav used to say in Yiddish, “Biz Reb Chaim, shtarot geven a chaspa b’alma”—before Rav Chaim shtarot were mere paper. Similarly, until Rav Chaim came and explained Yoreh Deah, the Rav said, it was just about pots and pans. Halachah had been a practical

world but Rav Chaim coverted it into a conceptual world.

The Brisker derech involves conceptual categories. Halachic acts, thoughts and objects are all conceptualized and placed in categories. Once placed in the proper categories, the halachic and conceptual characteristics of the phenomena become more clearly defined and logically comprehensible.

The Brisker emphasis on categorization explains the well-known Brisker attachment to the Rambam. The Rambam took the entire corpus of halachah and categorized all its elements in a strictly rational, analytical order. This is the same conceptual groundwork on which the Brisker derech is based.

A defining characteristic of the Brisker derech is that in the course of analyzing a sugya, one constantly asks, “What category does this fit into?” The question that is repeatedly posed is “What?” not “Why?” A pair of anecdotes relating to the Ponovezher Rav, Rav Yosef Kahaneman, highlights this distinction.

When the Ponovezher Rav passed away, I asked the Rav what his impression of him was. The Rav responded that he was a Torah giant and was self-sacrificing Rabbi Menachem Genack is CEO, OU Kosher.

in terms of building Torah. The Rav reminisced that his father, Rav Moshe, told him that the Ponovezher Rav had come to visit once when Rav Chaim was on vacation in order to speak to Rav Chaim in learning. Rav Chaim, however, curtailed the visit as he had to leave to help his daughter who was having a difficult childbirth. Rav Moshe ended up spending time learning with the Ponovezher Rav and telling over many of Rav Chaim’s chiddushim. The Rav told me that Rav Moshe was very impressed with the Ponovezher Rav. This story is complemented by an anecdote concerning the same episode related to me by the Ponovezher Rav’s grandson, Rav Eliezer Kahaneman. I related to Rav Eliezer what the Rav told me about his grandfather’s attempted encounter with Rav Chaim, and he told me that he was familiar with the event from his family’s side of the story. He recounted to me that the Ponovezher Rav, as a young man, sought the opportunity to visit Rav Chaim and discuss matters of learning with him. His rebbe, the Chafetz Chaim, recommended that he visit when Rav Chaim was on vacation rather than in Brisk, where Rav Chaim would be too busy for such a visit. Taking the Chafetz Chaim’s advice, the Ponovezher Rav went to the resort area where Rav Chaim was vacationing and was able to arrange a brief visit.

Rav Chaim asked him to say over one “shtikel Torah” after another, and at one point, the Ponovezher Rav, in a shtikel Torah on a sugya in Bava Kama, posed the rhetorical question, “Vi azoi vais di Gemara aza zach? [From where does the Gemara get this concept?]” Silent until then, Rav Chaim interrupted him and, with his deep voice, declared, “Di Gemara vais veil di Gemara vais; m’darf fregen nor vas shtait in di Gemara! [The Gemara knows because the Gemara knows! You should ask only what is written in the Gemara, and nothing else!]” Rav Eliezer further told me that his grandfather always considered himself a talmid of Rav Chaim because of this succinct but powerful insight he heard directly from Rav Chaim.

(When the Ponovezher Rav was ill, I visited him in the Fort Tryon Nursing Home in Washington Heights, and he

The Rav visiting a class at the Hebrew Academy of Long Beach in Long Beach, New York in the 1960s. Courtesy of HALB

asked me to tell over some Torah from the Rav. As we were learning Masechet Sukkah at the time, I told him something regarding mechitzot of sukkah. He said to me, “Ah, Reb Yoshe Ber, he is the greatest rosh yeshivah in the world.”)

There are theological consequences that emerge from the Brisker derech’s focus on “what,” not “why.” The Rav said often that when we speak about the Ribbono shel Olam, it is improper to ask “why.” The words the Rav used were “God’s will is self-justifying.” Man has to explain his actions but God does not. This is the reason that, as the Rav often emphasized, Judaism is not worried about logical contradictions, or

the “excluded middle.” Halachah is not based on common-sense notions but is an independent construct. Similarly, Rav Chaim thought that the quest to find reasons for the mitzvot, ta’amei hamitzvot, was inappropriate. He translated “ta’amei hamitzvot” as “the flavor of the mitzvot” to avoid implying that we are asking “why” God decreed a particular mitzvah or mitzvot.

In Ish HaHalachah, the Rav tells the story of witnessing the sunset of Yom Kippur, and his father, Rav Moshe, commenting that this is the most beautiful sunset of the year. For Rav Moshe, beauty was judged not on aesthetic grounds, but by halachic Spring 5778/2018 JEWISH ACTION

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The words the Rav used were “God’s will is self-justifying.” Man has to explain his actions but God does not. criteria—the sunset of Yom Kippur is mechaper, it contains the power of atonement.

The Rav’s goal in learning, however, was not to distill out the aesthetic and emotional, leaving only an austere cerebral concept at the core. On the contrary, for the Rav, the intellectual enterprise of Torah learning was infused with experiential drama. There was a dimension to the Rav’s learning that when the Rav presented the Gemara, it was as though the Shechinah was listening in. The Rav once articulated that feeling himself in a yahrtzeit shiur.

He said that when he was preparing a shiur alone he could feel a breath at his shoulder, the presence of the Divine, asking him, “Nu, Yossele, what do you think about this sugya?” As explained and exemplified by the Rav, talmud Torah is a form of tefillah, of avodah she’balev; learning is a means of connecting with Hashem.

We think of the Rav as a great philosopher but his philosophy was rooted in halachah. For the Rav, talmud Torah was at the root of many mitzvot. Sipur yetzi’at Mitzrayim is not merely an independent mitzvah but a form of talmud Torah. For this reason, the Rav explained, we recite the passage of Arami oved avi, which is a retelling of the Exodus story, and not the passages directly about the Exodus, because we have an obligation to be doresh kol haparashah, to study it in depth and bring out the meaning contained within this short retelling.

The Gemara in Sotah (13b) describes Moshe Rabbeinu as safra rabba d’Yisrael, the great scribe of Israel. The Rav explained that Moshe was a great scribe not because he wrote many books, but because he inscribed the Torah on the soul of Klal Yisrael. The Rav too wrote on the soul of his students, of those he communicated with, and that script is ultimately written into the hearts of the Jewish people.

In Hilchot Chagigah (3:6) the Rambam writes that Hakhel must be performed with the same fear and trembling of Matan Torah itself, because the king who reads the Torah at Hakhel is “the messenger of God to make His words heard.” That was the Rav’s mission; he was the king who was God’s messenger to make His words heard. Twenty-five years after the Rav’s death we still hear his echo reverberating, and the echo will continue until the end of time.

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Habits of Spiritually Strong Families

Raising Children with Values 40

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o religious Jews, parenting entails more than caring for our children physically and emotionally.

We must be invested in our children's religious identities, help mold their spiritual lives, and imbue them with a strong, deep emunah that will help them withstand the vicissitudes of life.

In the pages ahead, prominent rabbis and educators offer several practical tips or “habits” for raising children with strong religious beliefs.

Each contributor responded to one or two questions below: 1. What middot are most important for parents to work on to be successful in transmitting religious values?

2. What are the most effective ways for a parent to convey the core values of emunah and bitachon?

3. No one is religiously perfect. How does one deal with the inconsistency between what one teaches his children and his own actions?

4. What role does the school/yeshivah play in a child’s religious growth and development?

Habit No. 1: Be Authentic Rachel Silber There are three long term goals that are used as a litmus test to define the “mechunach child”—a well-taught child: 1. Child should know right from wrong; 2. Child should know his or her strengths; 3. Child is not afraid to fail or make a mistake.

A child primarily builds his values from his parents’ core value system.

In order for a child to learn this from his parents, two essential components must be present: relationship and authenticity.

Relationship—Without a positive relationship, parents are limited in their ability to mold their child. (How does Dad make you feel if he is controlling, condescending or both? Would Dad be someone we would choose to spend 42

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time with or pick as a role model?)

Authenticity—Children pick up on who we are even if we don’t utter a word about our beliefs.

One of my most vivid memories of my childhood is of my mother greeting the unkempt women who used to come to our door collecting tzedakah. In addition to giving whatever she could monetarily, my mother would offer the women, most of whom hadn’t showered in a while, fresh fruit and a hot drink.

Similarly, I cannot forget “Bess,” the ninety-something-year-old woman my mother would take on weekly shopping expeditions to Waldbaum’s. My mother would patiently walk up and down the aisles with Bess while she ever so slooowly perused the canned goods and the weekly specials. Then my mother would load up the car, schlep the bags into the elevator in Bess’ apartment building and bring them up to her door.

My mother did not teach me about chesed by speaking about it. She taught me via the personal example she set.

Values are transmitted through our actions, not our words. We have to be brutally honest with ourselves and figure out what values we stand for before we think about passing anything down. There should never be an inconsistency between what you tell your child your core value system is and what it actually is. Is it reasonable to lecture our children about the value Rachel Silber is a graduate of Michlalah Jerusalem College and received her MA in special education from Columbia University Teachers College. During her years living in Israel, Mrs. Silber taught in the Israeli high school system and founded and directed the Ramat Eshkol Reading and Writing Center. She attended Rebbetzin Sima Spetner’s parenting classes for over five years and consults with her on various educational issues. Mrs. Silber currently resides in Edison, New Jersey with her husband and six children. She teaches Navi in Reenas Bais Yaakov high school in Highland Park, New Jersey and is also the Judaic studies resource director at Yeshiva Shaarei Tzion in Piscataway Township, New Jersey.

of davening three times a day or setting aside time for daily Torah study if we ourselves do not exemplify this?

Can we teach our children to display responsible habits with their digital technology if we ourselves are not modeling such behavior? You may be able to fool yourself with sanctimonious lectures, but you cannot fool your child.

Perhaps even more powerful than our actions are the reactions that we present to our children. A reaction is defined by a spontaneous emotional response to an event. For example, what will make us more upset—a child who spills a bottle of grape juice on the Shabbat tablecloth or a child who speaks lashon hara at the Shabbat table? Our children learn so much about what really is important to us by our reactions.

Leba Musman Performing mitzvot is an essential feature of our mesorah.

It is only logical that we parents want to pass the importance of mitzvot on to our children in as complete and nuanced a way as possible. However, children are smarter and more perceptive than they are given credit for, and they are particularly adept at “reading between the lines.” They have an uncanny, radarlike knack for sensing hypocrisy, and a lack of sincerity can quickly undo all of the effort that we invest into behavioral training and reinforcement of mitzvah observance. It seems to me that acting with sincerity is the single most important element in successfully transmitting our Torah values and hashkafot to our children. Sincerity is the window to our values and our Leba Musman, LCSW-C is a licensed clinical social worker and serves as a school guidance counselor at Torah Institute (TI) in Baltimore, Maryland.

She received her MSW from the University of Maryland. Mrs. Musman resides in Baltimore with her husband and five energetic boys.

values provide the connection to our lifestyles. Obfuscating our children’s view of our true selves triggers their hypocrisy radar, making our capacity to reach them more difficult.

Habit No. 3: Be Growth-Oriented

Habit No. 2: Be Consistent

Parents should openly share that which is challenging, so that setbacks are viewed as opportunities rather than spiritual obstacles. When we share our challenges, appropriate missteps and strategies to succeed, we empower our children with “spiritual grit” to be their best selves. If Dad shares his story of how he left a meeting early to catch a winter Minchah, his children sense his commitment. When he takes it further and shares that he plans on scheduling his meetings earlier in the day to avoid having a conflict with minyan, they see spiritual success in the trenches of real life. As a result of communicating how we surmount our own religious challenges with thoughtful planning, we plant spiritual seeds.

I recently traveled for work to a warm climate and returned a couple of days before Chanukah. The trip was productive but very intense. When my children asked why I didn’t stay a bit longer and enjoy the sun, I easily answered that I wouldn’t be able to prepare for Chanukah properly and it simply wouldn’t feel right. There was no blame on Chanukah being “too early” or a waste of a trip. I made it clear that while the trip was necessary, preparing a chag for my family is my greatest joy and priority.

Ron Yitzchok Eisenman Our children do not expect us to be angels; however, they do expect and deserve to have parents whose behavior is predictable and consistent.

Aside from feeling loved, a child needs to feel secure and safe and that he has total and unbreakable trust in his parents.

At times a parent has to discipline his or her child; however, the discipline must be meted out with consistency.

A child, for example, might know that breaking curfew will result in being grounded for a few days or having his phone confiscated for a week.

If, however, his parents sometimes ignore when he breaks curfew and other times are enraged, this creates a feeling of insecurity in the child. A parent cannot allow his feelings and moods to dictate how he responds to a child’s infraction. If punishments vary depending upon a parent’s fickle mood, then the child gets a clear message: his parent is not someone whose behavior and reactions can be relied upon. This leads the child to feel—rightly so—that his parent is not someone he can trust.

Consistency, or the need for the same “mis-action” by the child to always be met with the same reaction on the part of the parent, is essential in establishing a relationship that has a strong foundation built on trust.

Rabbi Ron Yitzchok Eisenman is the rabbi of Congregation Ahavas Israel in Passaic, New Jersey.

Rachel Burg

Rachel Burg is the director of Camp Dina for Girls and a teacher at Rosenbaum Yeshiva of North Jersey. She has worked in informal, mainstream and special education for over twenty years.

Mrs. Burg is also a founding board member of Naaleh High School for Girls in Bergen County, New Jersey.

She currently resides in Bergenfield, New Jersey, with her husband Rabbi Steven Burg and is the mother of six amazing kids.

Adina Shmidman When children view their parents as growing individuals who are striving, parents are transmitting a valuable message to their children. Indeed, one of the most valuable lessons parents can teach their children is that failure, particularly in religious life, isn’t an experience reserved just for sinners.

A child internalizes the messages that parents communicate, and these words become the child’s internal dialogue, the self-speech that goes on in his or her head.

Carol Dweck in her book Mindset (New York, 2006) describes two mindsets that impact a person’s sense of striving and growth. Growth mindset is a belief that we can work hard and improve. The internal dialogue sounds like this: I want to learn from criticism; I find lessons and inspiration in people’s success; I am comfortable making mistakes. And instead of “I can’t” a child says, “I can’t do it yet.” Fixed mindset is the belief that our potential is fixed and set. Children raised in a fixed mindset environment believe that criticism is damaging and suggests failure. Risk and challenges are to be avoided lest they affirm weakness.

While Dweck’s theory is generally applied in educational settings, we can apply the theory to religious growth.

A truly religious home embraces a growth mindset where parents and children are constantly aiming for greater spiritual achievement.

Parents are in a position to validate the challenge of religious observance while creating an atmosphere that encourages growth and effort. Getting up in the morning for davening can be hard, but rather than criticizing a child for wanting to sleep in, parents would do well to empower their children to develop their “spiritual muscles” and recognize that it is a struggle.

Ultimately, religious growth is an experience of the heart and soul. It is not easily quantified or measured Spring 5778/2018 JEWISH ACTION

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Fear of Sin brings to Holiness; Holiness brings to the Holy Spirit, and the Holy Spirit brings to the Revival of the Dead.

Habit No. 4: Learn from Your Mistakes Rachel Silber

© Katherine Lynas

in the ways that we are accustomed to assessing intellectual growth and development (e.g. first reading Hebrew letters, then Rashi script, et cetera).

There are no obvious yardsticks to measure its success.

Nonetheless, we can realize religious growth in our lives, if we focus intently. Thus, one who works on davening with greater kavanah (fervor) develops a greater mindfulness and awareness, which hopefully will translate into other areas of religious development. Mindfulness in tefillah can impact mindfulness in speech and behavior. One doesn’t look at religious

accomplishments as static, but rather as stepping stones toward greater spiritual self-awareness and commitment. Hence the famous Talmudic teaching (Avodah Zarah 20b) of Rabbi Pinchas Ben Yair that forms the basis of the classic ethical work Mesillat Yesharim: “You shall guard yourself from everything evil” (Devarim 23:10): From here Rabbi Pinchas ben Yair derived: Torah brings to Watchfulness; Watchfulness brings to Zeal; Zeal brings to Cleanliness; Cleanliness brings to Separation; Separation brings to Purity; Purity brings to Piety; Piety brings to Humility; Humility brings to Fear of Sin;

Rebbetzin Dr. Adina Shmidman is the founding director of the Orthodox Union’s The Women’s Initiative. A dynamic community leader and teacher for over twenty years, she also serves as rebbetzin of the Lower Merion Synagogue of Bala Cynwyd, Pennsylvania and is the founding chair of the Rebbetzin Elaine Wolf a”h Rebbetzin to Rebbetzin Mentoring Program at Yeshiva University’s Center for the Jewish Future. Rebbetzin Shmidman lives in Bala Cynwyd with her husband and four sons.

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Must we demand perfection from ourselves in order to effectively pass down our values? There is a big difference between conflicting values and legitimately making mistakes.

Having different values than those that you teach your child is the antithesis of chinuch. Conversely, making mistakes and “getting up” is an incredible teachable moment. One of the most powerful messages that we can give over to our children is “sheva yipol tzaddik v’kam—a righteous man falls seven times and rises up again” (Mishlei 24:16). Everybody makes mistakes and the human condition is such that we are able to correct mistakes that we’ve made and repent for our sins. A parent who can effectively model this behavior is planting seeds of resilience—teaching a child that his mistakes can actually be the catalyst in the organic process of his personal growth. When a parent makes a mistake and does not fall apart, but rather learns and grows from the experience, he is modeling the value of personal growth.

Ask any of my kids and they are sure to tell you what I think about IAD (iPhone Addiction Disorder) or TAD (Texting Addiction Disorder). I feel very strongly about maintaining healthy digital-citizenship habits. Last year when I started a new position, I had a lot of work-related e-mails and text messages to respond to after working hours. One night, Moishy, my sevenyear-old son, turned to me and said: “Mommy, you’re so into your phone.”

I realized that I was setting a double standard. I decided at that moment that my phone would be set aside during supper, homework and bedtime routine. A few weeks later Moishy said:

When we share our challenges, appropriate missteps and strategies to succeed, we empower our children with “spiritual grit” to be their best selves.

“Mommy, I like you better without your phone.” This was certainly a crucial part of my own learning curve in responsibly balancing work, home and family relationships. Instead of feeling like a failure in front of my seven-yearold, I was able to reflect and become a better parent.

Habit No. 6: Know That “It Takes a Kehillah to Raise a Child”

Habit No. 5: Seek Guidance

Many parents feel they are alone when it comes to raising children.

In truth, there are many partners involved in raising a religious child. The primary partners are the parents, of course. They have the greatest influence on their children; they also must serve as full-time ambassadors for Yiddishkeit. Beginning at a very young age, parents need to give their children a love for Yiddishkeit in a loving and caring atmosphere.

Another pivotal partner in a child’s growth is a rav—ideally a rav who knows your family and cares about you. A good rav can provide moral support, help with difficult decisions, point you in the right direction when a professional is needed and offer advice regarding educational and other issues.

The yeshivah/day school is the third partner. Having been a rebbe for twenty-two years, baruch Hashem, I’ve witnessed firsthand the difference a good yeshivah can make in helping a child grow religiously. What’s the

Ron Yitzchok Eisenman A rav’s ability to analyze and counsel parents with a Torah-true vantage point is indispensable for any parent seeking proper spiritual guidance for his or her children. But helpful and effective guidance from one’s rav can only be achieved if parents take the time to cultivate a relationship with their shul rav. Couples who float from shul to shul and never bother to anchor themselves in one shul and develop a connection with their rav are unlikely to receive maximum benefit from seeking guidance from that rav.

Obviously, for true mental health issues one needs a competent and trained mental health professional, and a rabbi has to know when to say, “This is beyond my abilities.”

However, with regard to other issues, the rav—assuming he knows the family well—has an advantage over a therapist; he doesn’t just see the couple at weekly sessions, and therefore, he sees the bigger picture. The rav knows the couple, and understands their circumstances and community.

By Yitzie Ross

definition of a good yeshivah? A place where your children are encouraged to grow and know that they are loved and important. Our children spend most of their day in yeshivah. When choosing a yeshivah, make sure that it has an administration that has time for parents, and that the rabbeim and staff are warm and understanding.

Even more important than the yeshivah is the rebbe. A rebbe needs to love and care about his talmidim. Our children are a lot smarter than we like to think. Years ago, one of my students told me: “Many rabbeim told me they loved me, and some really did.” When a rebbe brings a positive attitude to the classroom and shows genuine excitement for learning Torah, for the yamim tovim and for being a part of Am Yisrael, his students will strive to follow in his path. I remember my firstgrade rebbe telling me that the word “atah” in every berachah proves that Hashem is with us all the time. He said it with such conviction and enthusiasm, it still resonates with me almost thirtyfive years later. That’s the power of a great rebbe.

Parents and rabbeim need to work together to make sure that children develop a love for Yiddishkeit and an excitement for Torah and mitzvot.

Constant communication is key, as is mutual respect.

The flip side is that the parents need to respect the rebbe as well. Putting down a rebbe because you don’t agree with him is a really bad idea. Going over his head to the principal every time you have an issue is also unfair.

Furthermore, if your child has an excellent rebbe or morah, let them know how grateful you are.

Yet another partner in a child’s growth is one that parents don’t necessarily think of—namely, friends. When our children are younger, we set up playdates and monitor their friendships.

As they grow older, we lose control over whom our children choose to hang

Rabbi Yitzie Ross, a grade-school rebbe on Long Island for over twenty years, writes a popular weekly parenting blog that has thousands of subscribers. He also gives parenting and social-media awareness classes and seminars throughout the US.

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Sometimes grandparents may be more or less religious than their children. What is the correct approach when dealing with religious differences?

By Leba Musman Grandparents play an indispensable and highly influential role in the life of a child.

That is, in part, the reason for the tensions that can arise due to differences of opinion regarding religious observance and outlooks between parents and grandparents.

Granted, there are many case-specific issues I cannot address in this format; but I would like to make a suggestion that may help resolve some of the challenges. Based on more than a decade of experience working in the yeshivah school system, it seems to me that, as a community, we are overly concerned with how others perceive and value our religious level of observance.

A shift in our focus will be helpful, regardless of whether the situation is that a grandparent is “not frum enough” or “too frum.” Focusing on grandparents’ good middot and finding Jewish values in which they excel—for example, chesed—can change the way both parents and grandchildren view the relationship. On a personal note, I am choosing to raise my children in a yeshivish school, whereas I grew up Modern Orthodox.

Nevertheless, I would be delighted if my children were to develop the character and principles that my parents possess and which they worked tirelessly to pass on to myself and my siblings. Let us highlight grandparents’ strengths when we discuss our parents with our children by telling stories about their kindness and their sensitivity to the needs and struggles of others. In this way, we provide our children with an opportunity to see the continuity in their family history and understand how seemingly very different people are part of an integrated, cohesive entity.

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out with. Nevertheless, friends play a tremendous role in our children’s future.

You don’t need to insist that all of your child’s friends be just like him. Actually, a bit of diversity is quite healthy. You do, however, need to make sure that your kids are supervised in an age-appropriate fashion. If you’re worried about the effect a certain child is having on your child, cutting off the relationship isn’t always the best answer. Rather, make sure to keep playdates at your house, so you can keep an eye on things.

It is very important to remember that any house your child goes to must have a good Internet filter or strong supervision.

The final partner is, of course, Hashem. We need to constantly daven that our children should stay on the path of Torah and mitzvot. We need to daven that Hashem should give us the strength and ability to be good parents, teachers and role models. Just remember, though, that it’s not just davening that will suffice; we need to put in our hishtadlut.

Habit No. 7: Make Hashem’s Presence Real in Daily Life

By Rachel Burg Instilling faith in our children is an often overlooked yet crucial element of parenting. We can help our children develop a strong faith in God by invoking His presence at any given opportunity. We must ensure that God’s presence is not merely felt when the pendulum swings to the most rewarding moments like childbirth and weddings, or to the most challenging moments like death and illness.

Do our children feel it at the dinner table when we share a quick anecdote that reflects a kiddush Hashem opportunity?

Do they feel it in the way we prepare for Shabbat? Do they feel it when they hear their mother tearing up while reciting the names of cholim (the ill) during hafrashat challah? Do they feel it when they hear a parent say “gam zu l’tovah” (“this too is for the best”) when they have two semachot to attend on the same evening and refuse to become frustrated?

If a flight runs late, let your children tease you and say, “I know, we weren’t supposed to be up in the air right now.”

Hopefully, they have observed their parents many times casually shrugging their shoulders after missing a flight, demonstrating their belief that Hashem is moving the chess pieces with their best interest in mind.

If they hear you express this concept as toddlers, they can mimic you as they mature and replay it in their own minds when they are adolescents. Ideally, it will become part of their belief system as adults.

We need to create conversations that are both holy and casual simultaneously. If a family creates a mission statement where emunah is going to be reinforced at every opportunity, the mindset shifts to creating an achievable relationship with Hashem.

Photo: Yehoshua Halevi

RAISING RELIGIOUSLY RESILIENT CHILDREN

By Shira Smiles Shira Smiles has taught Torah to women worldwide for three decades. She currently teaches at Darchei Bina, a women’s seminary for gap-year students in Jerusalem, and gives several parashah classes and Chumash chaburahs weekly, many of which are streamed over the Internet and viewed across the globe. She is the author of five books, including Torah Tapestries on Chumash (Jerusalem, 2012).

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y grown daughter once asked me if I felt I had been successful in raising my children. I responded by providing an outline of my and my husband’s main goals of chinuch, and then asked my daughter to evaluate for herself. Just as every institution has a mission statement that is reevaluated regularly, each family needs to have a vision and central focus in raising children, and to be flexible when necessary. While every family, hopefully, has religiosity as a goal, the question remains: how do we define what that means, and how do we go about achieving that goal? Put simply, what is an effective formula for raising children who are strong in their beliefs and have a real relationship with Hashem?

Part of this question is how much of our chinuch mission is entrusted to the school system and how much of it we personally pursue at home.

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When a child comes home wide-eyed with excitement and enthusiasm about Judaism, parents who express even one word of sarcasm have begun to demolish their own educational foundation. here; Hashem is there; Hashem is truly everywhere.” Unfortunately, for many children, that is where their recognition of Hashem begins and ends. Most schools make the assumption that knowledge of Hashem is a given, and they can start teaching His Torah and mitzvot. The results are students who are proficient in hilchot Shabbat and in-depth commentaries on Tanach, yet lack any meaningful relationship with Hashem or emotional connection with the Torah knowledge they acquired.

Is it any wonder that many of these students end up declining religiously, deeming observance unworthy of their time and energy? This tendency is particularly strong among those who don’t solidify their commitment by spending a year studying Torah in Israel after high school. Having taught Torah, baruch Hashem, for three decades on the elementary, middle and high school levels in the US, and currently on the seminary level in Israel, I continually encounter these type of students.

They are very Jewishly educated but are spiritually hollow. Their dominant feeling is that Yiddishkeit is a burden, encroaching upon their personal freedom. Students are looking for the relevancy of the texts they study and how Judaism is meaningful in their modern lives.

It is crucial for parents to be actively involved in erecting the foundation of their children’s education. Some parents mistakenly relegate the personal connection with Hashem—the very basis upon which the school needs to build—to the school system. Teachers 48

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try to “cover educational ground,” not necessarily “plant spiritual seeds.” It is imperative that parents take a closer look at their responsibility in the chinuch process. We must have clear goals of what we want to achieve and seek direction on how to succeed.

Rethinking Chinuch The source for the mitzvah of chinuch in the Torah offers excellent guidance in this quest. The Meshech Chochmah (Rabbi Meir Simcha Hakohen of Dvinsk [1843-1926]) highlights Bereishit 18:19, which describes Hashem’s decision to reveal to Avraham Avinu the impending destruction of Sodom. The pasuk states: I love him for instructing his descendants and his household to safeguard the way of Hashem to perform acts of righteousness and justice. The greatness of Avraham Avinu was manifest in his disseminating knowledge of Hashem to his household. In a similar vein, the Rambam in Sefer Hamitzvot [Aseh 3] says that we can come to love Hashem through contemplation of the wonders of creation. He adds that part of this mitzvah is to bring other people closer to Hashem and to tell them of His goodness and kindness.

When someone loves another person, he wants to publicize it. If you have ever witnessed the excitement of a new mother or newly engaged person, this concept is self-explanatory. Both exude enthusiasm; the mom will talk to anyone who will listen about her new baby and the bride will do the same about her prospective soulmate.

Similarly, one who truly loves Hashem

will want to share that knowledge with everyone else.

Rabbi Matisyahu Salomon [With Hearts Full of Love (Brooklyn, NY, 2009), p. 254] suggests that the mitzvah of chinuch falls under the larger rubric of love of Hashem. When parents are full of love for Hashem and His Torah, they want others to feel the same way.

This type of chinuch is not reduced to a list of “do’s and don’ts,” but is rather a beautiful experience of love. Do our children overhear us grumble “I have to bentch now” or do they hear us say “Baruch Hashem, I have the special opportunity to thank Hashem for the wonderful food that I just enjoyed”?

We can’t possibly expect our children to love Hashem and keep mitzvot simply because we tell them to do so. Chinuch begins with parents deepening their own relationship with Hashem, making it real, and sharing that enthusiasm with their children. Parents cannot convey a “do as I say, but not as I do” attitude towards mitzvah observance. A father who talks throughout davening cannot then go ahead and rebuke his children for talking in shul. Our actions speak louder than words, and our feelings speak louder than our actions. Rabbi Dovid Kaplan, a senior lecturer at Ohr Somayach in Jerusalem, tells a story of a boy who went off the derech. The boy described that the “straw that broke the camel’s back” was when his neighbor bought a new car. The boy noted that his father always spoke about how much he loved Torah and how excited it made him feel. However, when he saw his father’s reaction to the new car, he saw what really excited his father.

Children need to witness their parents’ passion for Yiddishkeit.

Laying the Groundwork of Faith So how do we begin? The first step in any relationship is knowledge of the other person. The more we know a person, the deeper our relationship with him or her. This is how love develops and is enhanced. To realistically reach this level of excitement in ahavat Hashem, we need to work on the building blocks of this relationship.

Rabbi Moshe Feinstein, zt”l, writes in a teshuvah [Yoreh Deah 3:76] that

the most important part of chinuch is to teach emunah. He advises parents to consistently tell their children that everything they have is from Hashem, and that they are only the emissaries.

When a child realizes that everything he possesses is from Hashem, he will develop a natural love for Him and for his parents for being the messengers.

The child will also feel an emotional connection and intuition for thanking Hashem, feeling that He is the source of all blessing. A child growing up in this environment develops the feeling that Hashem is as real and present as the sun in the sky. Hashem must be the byword in our lexicon, and this connection must be constantly strengthened.

Of course, people pay lip service to expressions such as “im yirtzeh Hashem” and “baruch Hashem” but they are often articulated without conviction.

We need to live by these credos.

I learned this lesson very clearly from one of my daughters. I was driving around Beverly Center, a shopping mall

in Los Angeles, looking for parking.

After I had circled many times in vain, I found a parking space right in front of the mall. I promptly exclaimed, “Wow, am I lucky!” to which my daughter, who was three years old at the time, piped up from the back, “Ima, todah Hashem.”

The younger a child is introduced to Hashem as the source of all good, the less emotional resistance he will have toward Him when he grows up.

The natural outgrowth of love is joy.

Rav Feinstein was once asked why so many Jews who were moser nefesh to keep Shabbat did not merit descendants who were shomrei Shabbat. His famous explanation was that these parents constantly expressed the difficulty of being a Jew. If we aim to inspire a love of Hashem so that our children remain loyal to Torah, we need to breathe genuine simchah into our Yiddishkeit.

Our children live in a generation of immediate gratification; with the touch of a finger they can access endless hours of entertainment. No wonder they are

easily bored with a lengthy davening that does not engender a feeling of gratification! We adults also grow disinterested in aspects of our Judaism.

When we parents grow complacent in our own observance, our relationship with Hashem becomes stale and joy is hard to access. To raise committed Jews, both in practice and emotional commitment, we must take the lead with our own spiritual development.

Becoming SpirituallyOriented Parents About twenty years ago, when I began teaching adult women, I asked a number of rabbanim what my teaching focus should be. Their unanimous response was that I must reach the heart, not only the mind, and to incorporate Chassidut into my teachings for this reason. My experience is that learning the deeper meaning ehind rituals has the power to transform the habitual into the holy.

For example, Chanukah becomes a

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time to access the hidden light of Creation, and to sit by the candles to meditate on our souls, which are referred to as “a candle of Hashem.”

On a deeper level, the Purim seudah is the King (Hashem) asking “Esther,” the hidden part of us, what we desire, and He will fulfill that request. Children who are raised learning deeper Torah insights will find their religious practices more meaningful. Over time, these youngsters will recognize that this kind of Torah lifestyle is more profoundly satisfying than the fleeting fun of technology. As they mature, they will seek out more experiences that respond to the yearning of their souls, as they look for purpose and value in their lives.

As a teacher, I confront the same challenge every year: how to foster a student’s personal growth when her home is not a growth-oriented environment. For example, I strive to teach my students that Pesach night is a powerful time for tefillah.

The Seder has eighteen berachot that directly correspond to the berachot of our daily Shemoneh Esrei; therefore, it is important to avoid extraneous conversation during the Seder.

However, my students invariably tell me that their Seder experience at home is focused on going through the text as quickly as possible. Why? So that t here will be more time to socialize with the extended family that is visiting. My students often feel that if they try to add some spirituality to the ritual, they are met with a derisive response from family members.

Perhaps with a sarcastic comment like, “Does the Rebbetzin have anything more to add?” Parents don’t realize that they have the power to instantly destroy their own finely-built families, just as a tall building can be demolished with the push of a button. We can undo many years of hard work in chinuch with the deadly weapon of cynicism. When a child comes home wide-eyed with excitement and enthusiasm about Judaism, parents who express even one word of sarcasm have begun to demolish their own educational foundation.

This cynicism may stem from the 50

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parents’ lack of confidence in their own religious practices. And sometimes the child perceives more negativity than was intended. Nevertheless, cynicism is always destructive. Another example is when a meshulach comes to the door soliciting tzedakah. If we mumble under our breath, “Another handout? Why doesn’t he just go get a job?,” then we have tainted the mitzvah of tzedakah for our children. Rav Feinstein emphasizes further that sending our children to give tzedakah to the meshulach at the door, instead of personally giving him the attention he deserves, is also not positive chinuch. We have not taught our children to be kind and giving people; rather, we have modeled laziness and taught our children to disdain those on a lower socioeconomic level. Likewise, speaking derogatorily about rabbis or teachers sends a message to our children to disrespect Torah authorities. This behavior is akin to dynamite that obliterates a building’s very foundation. If our goal is to raise Torah-committed children, then we first must eradicate our own destructive behavior.

The Divine in Daily Life The pasuk in Yirmiyahu [7:28] says: “Faith was lost, it was eliminated from their mouths.” The Alter of Kelm (Rabbi Simcha Zissel Ziv [1824-1898]) expounds that faith is lost when “it is eliminated from our mouths,” that is, when we don’t constantly talk about Hashem. It is imperative for parents to connect with Hashem all the time.

When discussing financial success or any good fortune, it is important to show gratitude to Hashem. Likewise, when faced with challenges, we need to acknowledge that this too is from Hashem; a challenge is the Divine call to introspect and to learn from the experience. When Hashem is “part of the family” and an intrinsic part of one’s life, then a youngster will be open to learning what the Torah expects from him. A year of study in Israel shows young adults that a Torah lifestyle is real for people, not just a theory. All people crave purpose and spirituality.

Everyone craves structure and meaning.

Imagine a family that joins together

When we parents grow complacent in our own observance, our relationship with Hashem becomes stale, and joy is hard to access. at the dinner table and shares a short message from Rabbi David Ashear’s Daily Emunah e-mail series. Such a family is nourished intellectually and emotionally by the heightened awareness of Hashem. This family feels Hashem not just on Shabbat, or in shul, but in all aspects of their lives. This is our mission: “placing Hashem in front of us at all times.”

Another powerful tool to create this constant awareness is telling stories of hashgachah pratit, Divine Providence, at the Shabbat table. When each family member shares a moment when she felt Hashem’s presence, it strengthens her spiritual connection. Rabbi Yechezkel Levenstein, famed mashgiach at the Mir Yeshiva during World War II, was known to give his daughters a small coin for each hashgachah pratit event that they would relate to him. We often play the game “I Spy” with our children.

Imagine the profound effect of a Jewish version of “I Spy,” identifying the Hand of Hashem intimately involved in our lives. When parents recount a story that clearly shows a series of coincidences, they should preface the story with “What hashgachah pratit happened to me today!” When this becomes our manner of speaking, our children will also begin to frame their stories in the same way. Children who hear about hashgachah will look for hashgachah

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Chinuch begins with parents deepening their own relationship with Hashem, making it real, and sharing that enthusiasm with their children. themselves. Over time, they will develop a hashgachah perspective on the world.

Chinuch, however, extends beyond this emotional connection. When Hashem is one’s focus, we need to include middot as well. It is the parents’ responsibility to teach their children to act appropriately, not just because it is good manners, but because it is the way to emulate Hashem. When a child does an act of kindness, praising the child for acting in a God-like way reinforces this message. Rabbi Aharon Kotler, zt”l, founder of Lakewood’s Beth Medrash Govoha, notes in Mishnat Rav Aaron that we mistakenly think that deveikut is all about religious ritual—covering our heads in tallitot and davening fervently. But the best way to cling to Hashem, he says, is to follow in His ways and imitate His attributes.

Hashem is kind and merciful, so we need to behave likewise. Smiling at others, complimenting them, and helping people—these are all forms of deveikut. The message to our children is that Judaism encompasses all aspects of personal conduct, not just formal religious observance. Hashem gives without expecting reciprocation; we need to follow suit.

In raising my family, I have found that the more one brings Hashem into daily life, the deeper the connection.

Two of my favorite ideas reflect this concept. One is the explanation for the shortest line of the prayer Avinu Malkeinu, asking Hashem to inscribe us in the book of merits. Rabbi Salomon explains that we are really asking to be inscribed in the book of opportunities to do mitzvot. We ask 52

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Hashem, “If you have a mitzvah to get done, please give it to me.” This interpretation underscores the belief that it is a privilege to do mitzvot and not a burden. When we are presented with an opportunity to serve God, we must grab the chance and be grateful for the connection. Mitzvot are not a checklist, but precious opportunities for growth. A practical application of this idea is training children to always carry extra school supplies, so that they are equipped to help someone who has forgotten something. Children learn to feel the joy and fulfillment in giving.

The second idea is quoted by Rabbi Mordechai Gifter, zt”l, former rosh yeshivah of the Telshe Yeshiva in Cleveland. When the Torah describes Hagar’s banishment from Avraham Avinu’s home, it states that she wandered lost in the desert. Rashi notes that this refers to her returning to idolatry. The obvious question is, where exactly is that alluded to in the text?

The Torah states that she was lost, not that she returned to idolatry.

Rabbi Gifter explains that the fact that Hagar felt that she was lost was indicative that she had left the teachings of Avraham Avinu. A believing Jew should never feel that he is lost, because we are exactly where Hashem wants us to be. Therefore, the fact that the text says Hagar was lost indicates that she was lost spiritually as well; she had lost the true perspective on life.

Before the days of GPS and Waze, I would drive around and often lose my way. It was at those moments that my children would remind me that we are not really lost. We are in the place Hashem wants us to be. As they

grew older, I extended this concept to other parts of their lives. So often we find ourselves in situations that we never imagined. Recognition that Hashem orchestrates everything helps us cope through challenging times. In general, it is much easier to navigate these difficulties when the emotional relationship with Hashem is already solidified by a history of His intimate closeness and personal care.

Even when this foundation is in place, the cementing of the relationship is tefillah. Parents are obligated to daven for their children every single day—and the more specific our prayers, the better.

In the Morning Prayers, we beseech Hashem that our children should find the ways of Torah to be sweet and pleasant. We need to pray for success in all areas of their lives. Rabbi Shimshon Pincus, zt”l, teaches that children are born from the tears of their mothers; it is the “watering” of their success throughout life. Taking children to the doctor for ear and throat infections are little reminders to keep davening for every detail of their lives. This constant tefillah should not be kept quiet—our children need to know that we daven for them! Sometimes I find a note in my daughter’s handwriting left next to my siddur. It might remind me that the teacher is switching seating assignments that morning, and to please daven that she should be placed next to a friend. Children should understand that davening doesn’t only take place in front of the Shabbat candles, but at all times throughout the week. When your daughter comes home from school and you ask her how she did on her test, mention that you davened that she should succeed. The principle of “the apple does not fall far from the tree” does not hold true in hurricane winds.

We are living in stormy times. The best protection we can offer our family is our prayers and tears.

Was I successful in raising my children? I need to wait until, im yirtzeh Hashem, I watch my children raise their children, and the grandchildren raise the following generation. Only then will I be able to answer the question. Until then, I will continue to daven.

REVIEW ESSAY

SHABBAT TABLE TORAH

WELCOME TO OUR TABLE: Words of Torah, Insightful Questions and Inspiring Stories from Our Shabbos Table to Yours

IN PURSUIT OF PEACE: A Torah Guide to Relationships

By Ari Wasserman Feldheim Publishers, New York, 2017 463 pages

By Hershel D. Becker Mosaica Press, Israel, 2018 376 pages

Reviewed by Gil Student

S

habbat meals offer a unique opportunity for parents to share their deepest values with their children. For many people struggling with busy schedules, Shabbat is the best time for important conversations. The forced closeness of the Shabbat table allows for a free flow of thoughts. However, time is not the only resource many of today’s parents lack.

How do you convey values? How do you start those important conversations in a way that is not awkward or alienating? The traditional method is the devar Torah, an insight into the weekly Torah portion. A well-structured devar Torah captures the imagination of listeners and sparks thoughts and discussion about our religious lives. Many people have difficulty creating a high-quality devar Torah, but there is a ready solution for this challenge.

THE JPS RASHI DISCUSSION TORAH COMMENTARY

By Steven and Sarah Levy The Jewish Publication Society, Philadelphia, 2017 191 pages

The literature of Torah commentaries contains some of the most important theological teachings in Jewish history.

Thanks to the relatively recent publishing revolution, many books in this genre are widely available, including a good deal translated into, or originally written in, English. Even parents who are not experienced Torah scholars can access divrei Torah in books, repeating them at the Shabbat table to express the values they find important in life. But it isn’t as easy as that.

Divrei Torah come in all shapes and sizes. Primarily, they are intended to illuminate the Biblical text, not to facilitate the transmission of values.

Sometimes you have to search through dozens of divrei Torah until you find one that fits your mood and your audience. That requires serious skills and time for preparation, both of which not everyone has in abundance. Four writers in three books have tried to simplify this process. Each book, in its

own way, offers easy access to usable divrei Torah with accompanying tools to facilitate the sharing of values.

Rabbi Hershel Becker’s In Pursuit of Peace: A Torah Guide to Relationships provides three divrei Torah for each weekly Torah portion, which can be read directly off the page. Each is concise, clear and carefully structured.

The book’s subtitle, referring to relationships, undersells the work’s focus on religious self-improvement. This is a musar study written in a style and tone appropriate for both the newcomer and the experienced scholar. Rabbi Becker tends to use classical commentators. He mined the literature for insights that highlight ideas about proper behavior and attitudes, concepts that we can use for ourselves and to educate our children in Jewish practice. He ends each devar Torah with questions about how we can apply these concepts in our own lives, followed by a sentence or two summarizing the underlying idea.

Rabbi Ari Wasserman’s Welcome to Our Table reveals the author’s system of generating meaningful conversation at the Shabbat table. He begins with a devar Torah and then asks a related question intended to provoke thoughtful responses. This book includes two such divrei Torah for each week, generally culled from recent commentaries, including Chassidic works. Rabbi Wasserman adds questions for discussion and stories, often drawing answers from guests who have been at his Shabbat table. For example, regarding Moshe Rabbeinu’s impressive demeanor, Rabbi Wasserman quotes a devar Torah from Rabbi Moshe Sternbuch, which tells a story about joggers helping each other Rabbi Gil Student writes frequently on Jewish issues and runs Torahmusings.com. He is a member of the Jewish Action Editorial Board.

Spring 5778/2018 JEWISH ACTION

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For many people struggling with busy schedules, Shabbat is the best time for important conversations. keep up. Rabbi Wasserman then asks: “When did another person’s actions have a positive impact on you, or on someone you know?” He includes two answers consisting of stories, one in which the storyteller describes how he was moved to start Daf Yomi after passing someone running early in the morning to a beit midrash, another in which the storyteller’s interactions with a colleague moved the latter to start putting on tefillin.

Steven and Sarah Levy’s The JPS Rashi Discussion Torah Commentary analyzes three passages from Rashi on each Torah portion. Rashi’s commentary is integral to Torah study, incorporated by many into their weekly review of the Torah portion. I am sure that I am not alone in constantly being amazed by the depth and relevance of Rashi’s comments. This book serves as an introduction to Rashi, focusing on the resonance of even seemingly obscure comments. Each study is brief, consisting of an introduction or story to place the passage in conceptual context; Rashi’s text with translation; and then a brief restatement of the explanation. These are followed by three questions, often elaborate, for discussion. For example, Rashi (Bamidbar 3:38) explains that the tribes camped near Moshe in the desert grew to become Torah scholars due to their proximity to Moshe. The authors explain that people are influenced by their neighbors because living in a community strengthens positive values. They then ask: “Describe a neighbor from your childhood with whom you had a close relationship. Did that person have any impact on the person you’ve become?"

Ideally, we should all prepare diligently for our Shabbat table discussions. Realistically, sometimes we will be able to read these divrei Torah in advance and sometimes not. Each of these three books allows the reader to open it and read directly to those gathered around the table. The styles of the divrei Torah, the topics addressed and the nature of the insights will appeal differently to each person. However, even if you prefer a different style of devar Torah, you can appreciate the methods offered by these authors to spark stimulating Shabbat table conversation.

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TALKING WITH VETERAN EDUCATOR RABBI MORDECHAI FINKELMAN

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o often we fall into the trap of parenting on autopilot. We are reactive, instead of proactive.

We are exhausted, drained and impatient with our children. While we cannot realistically always be well-rested, attentive and patient parents, we can be “conscious” or “mindful parents”: that is, parents who have given serious thought to the kind of home they want to have and the kind of kids they want to raise.

Conscious parenting implies parents who have spiritual goals in mind for their children, as well as an image of the kind of parent they want to be. So even though they may fall short of their expectations, they are not, as a general rule, parenting on autopilot, but rather are guided by their spiritual goals, dreams and aspirations.

Jewish Action spoke with veteran educator Rabbi Mordechai Finkelman, mashgiach of Yeshiva Ohr Hachaim in Queens, New York, on how to raise spiritually-minded children in today’s world.

Photo: Moshe Gershbaum/courtesy of Agudath Israel of America Archives

Special thanks to Binyamin Ehrenkranz for his assistance in preparing this article.

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Jewish Action: What are the most effective ways for a parent to convey the core values of emunah and bitachon? In other words, how do parents instill in their children an inner strength so that the natural difficulties of life don’t become religious crises?

Rabbi Mordechai Finkelman: Every Jewish person is born with emunah. Upon becoming a Jew, every ger and giyores acquires it as well. Thus, the question really is: how does a parent keep this innate emunah alive? How does he nurture it and build a fire of emunah within a child that will carry him through life?

The answer lies in the mitzvah of “v’ahavta es Hashem Elokecha—and you should love Hashem your God.” We are obligated to love Hashem. The Sefer HaChinuch teaches that when you are a child of Avraham and Sarah, you are blessed with a natural love for Hakadosh Baruch Hu. To see a real-life illustration of this, look at preschool children. They understand very little about Hashem intellectually, but their enthusiasm for

Often I see parents of young children . . . find their child’s irreverent remark to be clever; they are amused. But chutzpah is not amusing.

Hakadosh Baruch Hu and His mitzvos is remarkable.

Many Rishonim and Acharonim struggle with the mitzvah of v’ahavta es Hashem Elokecha. How can we be commanded to feel an emotion? Essentially, the commandment to love Hashem really means—avoid ruining the love of Hashem that you were born with; don’t destroy that love.

How can that love be ruined? Every individual is blessed with a certain capacity for love. The Sefas Emes explains that in Lashon Hakodesh, words that are similar are related conceptually. Kessef, for example, means money, but the same root also means tremendous desire or love, as in “Kah echsof noam Shabbos—Hashem, how I long for the sweetness of Shabbos.” What’s the connection between the two concepts? Like money, love has to be budgeted or else it will run dry. If people are going to love their car, and love sushi and love trips to the Bahamas and other material, finite things, they will be

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If people are going to love their car and love sushi and love trips to the Bahamas and other material, finite things, they will be squandering the natural love they have for Hakadosh Baruch Hu and for spiritual matters. squandering the natural love they have for Hakadosh Baruch Hu and for spiritual matters. Parents must set a positive example and show their children how to love and pursue matters of the spirit. In addition, adopting unhealthy influences from the society in which we live (for example, exposing ourselves to violence to the point that it becomes entertaining) can detract from and obscure our innate love for Hashem. In the positive realm, how do we nurture our inborn emunah? Learning Torah nurtures emunah; tefillah—talking to Hashem, understanding what we are saying— nurtures emunah.

JA: How does one begin to go about raising children who will aspire to spiritual goals rather than financial and material ones?

RMF: I had wonderful parents who came to this country at the beginning of World War II as teenagers. Throughout their lives, making a living was a struggle. But my parents never spoke about money.

If we wanted a bicycle or anything else my parents couldn’t afford, they never said, “We can’t afford it.” They would say, “Not everybody has the same things. Different people have different things.” We couldn’t afford to go to summer camp; we stayed home during the summers. But our parents never complained about finances—we had what we needed. We lived in a small apartment. Later on my parents bought 58

JEWISH ACTION Spring 5778/2018

a house in a non-Jewish neighborhood because that was what they could afford. But if we ever needed a sefer, we always got it. I don’t know how they had money for it. At one point, I wanted a Shitah Mekubetzes, a five-volume set that was quite expensive. I had it the next day.

My father had a seder after Shacharis that he would attend before going to work and he had a two-hour seder every single weeknight, even though he worked a twelve-hour day. My mother, a”h, bought herself a Chumash and Rashi with English, Lashon Hakodesh and Yiddish so that she could learn with us at night. She was very supportive of my father’s learning and we knew that her studying with us was so that my father would be able to learn. I believe I have the privilege of being involved in teaching Torah because I saw how important learning was to my parents.

JA: Today it seems that the level of materialism in frum communities is such that even someone who might be tight on finances and has his priorities in order is fighting a losing battle.

RMF: That is an excellent point. Raising children today is significantly more challenging as there is much more materialism in the Jewish community than there was years ago. Parents need to plan. When my wife and I looked for appropriate schools for our children, we made an effort to find a school where the families were similar to ours, and

were not running after materialism.

Similarly, we tried to pick a neighborhood that was consistent with our values and where our children would not be confronted with too much materialism, so that their tests would be minimized.

I would add that every family needs a rav and guidance in ruchniyus matters.

Even rabbis have rabbis. My rav, Rabbi Moshe Wolfson, always had a rebbe to whom he could ask questions.

JA: How should parents begin going about choosing the right school for a child?

RMF: It’s crucial to look for a school that will give your children—in addition to an education—the tools for life you feel are very important. Once you identify a few possible options, you should visit each school during recess or lunchtime to see how the children interact with one another. When principals take parents around on a tour, the children in the classrooms will always be on their best behavior. But whatever a parent witnesses during recess or lunchtime will tell the real story: how organized the school is, the level of supervision, how safe the children are and if they’re taught to get along with each other. Watch the children in the schoolyard during recess, look at how they dress—it will tell you a lot. You’ll hear their language, how they speak to one another—it will reveal what kind of homes they come from. Children’s language doesn’t generally reflect what they hear from their teachers. It reflects what they hear from their parents.

The choice of a school also depends greatly upon where you choose to live. You need to move to a neighborhood where you will find families who share your values. Such families will have built a school that you are comfortable with.

JA: What’s a common mistake parents make when it comes to conveying spiritual values?

RMF: Often I see parents of young children who don’t demand enough respect. Instead of telling their children,

“You can’t speak to a Mommy or a Tatty [father] that way,” they find their child’s irreverent remark to be clever; they are amused. But chutzpah is not amusing.

Some parents don’t realize that the younger we start training a child, the more likely it will create an impression; we’re making an impression on our children all the time.

In a similar vein, some parents don’t recognize the beauty of their children’s younger years; they fail to see the importance of spending time with their young children. They are grateful if their children are occupied watching a video for hours so that they have free time themselves, when there’s so much value in spending time with a child, playing and interacting with him.

Moreover, some parents mistakenly believe that young children don’t pick up on things that surround them—and they do. Children repeat the words they hear at home all the time.

I remember a story involving Rabbi Yitzchok Hutner, rosh yeshivah of

coarse, but everything else about her is Yeshivas Rabbeinu Chaim Berlin. A so amazing.” So I told him I’m going to teenage boy was brought in to the check into her background. I did, and I yeshivah by a police officer. He had discovered that her parents spoke like been caught shoplifting in a local store. that. So I told the boy, “She learned this After the policeman left, and the teenTo advertise was reprimanded and sent back to class, from her parents. See if she can work in the next issueon of herself now while you’re dating.”

Rabbi Hutner was asked if he planned The language wasn’t a part of her, she to throw the boy out of yeshivah. He had simply picked it up. She changed said, “No, I’m not going to throw him the way she spoke and they are out. I’m going to look into his backhappily married. ground and try to understand: Is this please contact A final misconception: some parents boy a real thief who will do this again, think their children will be better than or is this something he learnedJoseph at homeJacobs Advertising they are—better Jews, better people. It and once he understands how wrong it work that way. Parents need to is, he won’t do it? We have to find out at 201.591.1713doesn’t or model the behavior they want their if he comes from a home where there’s arosenfeld@josephjacobs.org children to imitate. They need to be cheating and dishonesty. If dishonesty good examples in every way. and stealing are not a part of him and it’s just something he learned, he can be taught what’s right.”

I was involved with a similar situation recently: a young man of marriageable age met a woman he thought was wonderful, but her language was coarse.

He told me, “I can’t even think of marrying a woman whose language is

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Two bearded, religious Jews walk across a courtyard in the Warsaw Ghetto.

Photo: United States Holocaust Memorial Museum, courtesy of Rafael Scharf 60

JEWISH ACTION Spring 5778/2018

SPECIAL SECTION

REMEMBERING THE SPIRITUAL HEROES OF THE WARSAW GHETTO: ON THE OCCASION OF THE 75TH ANNIVERSARY OF THE WARSAW GHETTO UPRISING

Nestled in a farflung corner of Brooklyn, New York is the Amud Aish Memorial Museum, a relatively new Holocaust museum that takes an entirely different approach to presenting the terrifying years of 1939 to 1945. Opened three years ago under religious auspices, Amud Aish does not center on the persecution, the death machinery, and the systematic killing of our brothers and sisters. Rather, it tells a story often overlooked by so many other Holocaust museums—the story of the extraordinary spiritual strength and fortitude exhibited by thousands of victims.

Amud Aish, home to the largest archive of Orthodox rescue efforts during the war, tells a narrative of faith and spiritual resilience—a Shabbat challah cover used in the death camps; a prayer book found in the Theresienstadt concentration camp; a frayed prayer shawl worn secretly by a prisoner at Auschwitz. Writing for the online publication Tablet, Noa Gutow-Ellis, a Reform Jewish writer, was deeply moved by the museum's radically different approach to Holocaust education: “In the DC [Holocaust] museum,” she wrote, “there are multiple displays of guns used in the Warsaw Ghetto Uprising. But when a young boy asked [the tour guide] before his Amud Aish tour, ‘Will we see guns?’ she replied, ‘No, you won’t see guns or anything scary because this is a museum about life, not death.’ Amud Aish is a Jewish museum focused on the lives of Jews during the Holocaust—not the weapons used to kill them.”

Jewish Action spoke with Rabbi Sholom Friedmann, director and CEO of the Amud Aish Memorial Museum, about the staunch faith and spiritual heroism exhibited by the Jewish heroes of the Warsaw Ghetto.

All images courtesy of the Amud Aish Memorial Museum, except where indicated otherwise.

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Jewish Action: Can you explain what the term “spiritual resistance” means in the context of the Holocaust?

Rabbi Sholom Friedmann: The Warsaw Ghetto Uprising, which began on April 19, 1943 and lasted until May 16, is the example typically referred to when discussing physical resistance.

In Warsaw there is a large monument, and there’s a replica of it at Yad Vashem.

One side depicts the Warsaw Ghetto Uprising and the Jewish fighters surrounding Mordechai Anielewicz, the leader of the resistance. Created soon after the establishment of the State of Israel, the monument was meant to depict the new kind of Jew—the warrior who will fight for and defend the Jewish people. On the other side of the monument, there is a depiction of Jewish victims, all seemingly religious, with a rabbi holding a Torah scroll, looking downward. There, the monument represents the religious, seemingly passive Jews who went like sheep to the slaughter. The message appears to be that religious Jews tried resisting spiritually, but that wasn’t successful, whereas the Jews who resisted physically made a big mark on the history of the Holocaust.

This was the false narrative that was believed in the State of Israel for a long time. But were the religious Jews in fact passive? Were they submissive? I don’t believe so. I believe their heroism and spiritual strength were reflected in the fact that their decisions on how to respond to the Holocaust were based on a whole different set of ideas and principles. Their bravery and heroism were manifest by adhering to their religious beliefs despite the danger and the terrifying circumstances.

The very term “spiritual resistance” is, however, a misnomer. Resistance implies that there are two conflicting parties with one making a demand on the other, and the other resisting the fulfillment of that demand. In the case of the Warsaw Ghetto Uprising, physical resistance refers to Jews who resisted being rounded up and deported by the Nazis. But the Orthodox Jews practicing their Judaism were not putting on tefillin or davening in 62

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Auschwitz or creating clandestine yeshivos in the Warsaw Ghetto in order to resist Nazis. To suggest that mitzvah performance is a form of resistance is simply untrue; Jews performed mitzvos because this is how they practiced Judaism. This was their way of life, what they had been trained to do no matter what the circumstances were. Orthodox Jews have always looked to Torah and to their Jewish identity for guidance, irrespective of what was going on around them.

JA: How does this museum present the story of the Uprising and the story of the Holocaust in general?

RSF: As Orthodox Jews we tend to view history a bit differently than nonOrthodox Jews. Take a look at the big, brand-name Holocaust museums: Yad Vashem in Israel and the United States Holocaust Memorial Museum in Washington. In presenting the Holocaust, both focus on the perpetrator as the end result. In

other words, the Jewish experience during the Holocaust is a means to an end; the goal is to present and understand the perpetrator and the persecution that occurred. Those museums offer perspectives that are perpetrator-based. Their overriding message is: How do we prevent such atrocities from happening in the future?

More specifically, Yad Vashem’s message is “Never again!”—by educating people, we’re never going to allow this to occur again. Similarly, the US Holocaust Memorial Museum universalizes the message by addressing contemporary genocide. Its message: be an activist and stand up against injustice and intolerance.

We view the Holocaust differently.

We understand that our plight in the Diaspora is that we’re going to be suffering persecution. There are going to be perpetrators who are out to destroy us: “ela shebechol dor vador omdim aleinu lechaloseinu—but in every generation they rise against us to destroy us.” That’s part of our

Middle school students from Yeshiva Darchei Torah in Far Rockaway, New York examining the tefillin that Mauthausen inmate Rabbi Yitzchok Avigdor used in the concentration camp from 1944 to 1945. Rabbi Avigdor served as an assistant to his father, Rabbi Yaakov Avigdor, who was the chief rabbi of Drohobycz, Poland before the war. After the war, Rabbi Avigdor was the spiritual leader of the United Synagogues of Greater Hartford, Connecticut. He died in 2010.

Orthodox Jews have always looked to Torah and to their Jewish identity for guidance, irrespective of what was going on around them. heritage and our tradition. Of course we understand that the perpetrator must be dealt with, and we have to do whatever we can to ensure that justice is served. But as a general rule our focus is on the victim experience, not on the perpetrators; we view the perpetrator as a means to understand the Jewish experience. By learning about the kind of persecution they were facing, we understand the strength of a Jew, what kind of resilience it required to put on tefillin every day under those circumstances.

The focus on the victim has always been the traditional view. Take, for example, the holiday of Pesach. How much time do we spend talking about the Egyptians as opposed to the time we spend discussing the Jewish response to the Eyptian exile? Similarly, with regard to Chanukah, very little time is spent analyzing what the Greeks were doing. We’re more interested in how the Chashmonaim responded to the persecution. Again, how much do we know about the Persians? But we know a lot about the Jewish experience during the time of the Purim miracle and how the Jews in Persia responded to the threat of extinction.

We take the same approach to the Holocaust.

When studying the Holocaust, we ask: How did these Jews respond and what does it mean for us? What’s the message for us? This is the traditional way of viewing our history.

In his famous work, Man’s Search for Meaning, Viktor Frankl suggests that those who survived the Holocaust were able to do so because they found meaning in their suffering. In fact, he introduced a whole new form of psychotherapy based on the idea that people have the ability to find meaning in their suffering, which enables them to withstand it. There are others who disagree with Frankl, such as social historian Lawrence Langer, who claimed that no meaning could be found in Auschwitz.

It was a situation of “choiceless choices” according to Langer—no matter what one did, he was always going to be worse off; in the death camp there was no meaning.

Frankl, however, contends that there were individuals who even in the midst of such extreme despair found meaning.

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“This Is Their Story Too” OU’s Our Way Brings Holocaust Education to Jewish Deaf

By Bayla Sheva Brenner In the summer of 2016, Amud Aish launched a special tour for a population virtually excluded from most Holocaust museum programming—the Jewish deaf.

It opened its doors to Our Way for the Deaf and Hard of Hearing, a project of the OU’s National Jewish Council for Disabilities.

The tour, which focused on stories of deaf victims and survivors of the Holocaust, as well as general Holocaust education, was such a success that Amud Aish repeated it the following year and plans to do so this year as well.

“The visitors were so happy to have a tour that catered to their specific needs. It was also fulfilling on our end to provide them with this opportunity,” says Fayga Brisman, development director of Amud Aish. “After all, this is their story too.”

Rabbi Eliezer Lederfeind, founding director of Our Way and initiator of the tour, held during the “Three Weeks” summer mourning period, brought along a sign language interpreter. In addition, Rabbi Lederfeind arranged for a speaker with direct knowledge of deaf survivors.

During her presentation, the speaker spoke of her mother, a deaf survivor from Czechoslovakia.

“The participants were visibly moved by the tour,” says Miryam Gordon, program coordinator at Amud Aish. “They asked questions; they were responsive and engaged.”

Apparently, it was an educational experience for the Amud Aish staff as well. “It was a very powerful evening for all of us,” says Gordon.

Bayla Sheva Brenner is an award-winning freelance writer and a regular contributor to Jewish Action.

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For the most part, Orthodox Jews brought meaning with them.

Their adherence to Torah and mitzvos constituted a collective source of meaning.

JA: Are there stories illustrating spiritual heroism among secular Jews?

RSF: We have recorded testimony about non-religious Jews who, when the Nazis invaded ghettos or were destroying shuls, were the first to run and try to save the sifrei Torah; they allowed themselves to be killed with those sifrei Torah. Whether or not they identified as Orthodox, they recognized that a sefer Torah was part of their identity.

Janusz Korczak, who was not Orthodox, was quite a heroic figure in the Warsaw Ghetto. He introduced a whole new educational system—a really fascinating system. This was particularly meaningful within the Ghetto, because he was caring for children who had lost their parents and were traumatized.

They needed some type of encouragement, and he saw a way to empower them through education. He had a Yiddishe heart, was deeply concerned about the children, and went to his death with them. His life could have been spared [as a doctor, he was considered valuable] but he refused to save himself and allow the children to go to their deaths without him.

JA: Some view the Uprising as a central part of the Holocaust, as it was a symbol of resistance to the Nazis and an act of heroism. This is certainly the secular Jewish view. Many religious Jews share that view as well, but there are other opinions about the Uprising, and some even argue that it was a futile attempt and may have caused more harm than good. Can you shed light on this issue?

RSF: Religious Jews always looked to halachah for guidance. The Warsaw Ghetto Uprising was no different. No doubt, there were repercussions that would occur in the event of an uprising. What doesn’t get much attention is that the Warsaw Ghetto Uprising inspired other uprisings—including an uprising at the Sobibor death camp—all of which occurred around the same period. The Nazis responded with what was known as “Operation Harvest Festival.”1 In November of 1943, close to 40,000 Jews were killed in one day as a direct response to these uprisings.

The Nazis made it very clear that any act of revolt would result in consequences for the others. So halachically, what was one allowed to do? These were very complicated halachic questions.

And yet, we know that Rabbi Menachem Ziemba, one of the prestigious rabbinic leaders of the Warsaw Ghetto, supported the Uprising.

JA: To what degree did Torah-observant Jews participate in or cooperate with the Uprising?

RSF: That’s a difficult question. We don’t have too many records indicating how many religious people participated. I couldn’t say with any authority what the numbers were, but there clearly were Orthodox Jews who did participate. Those who did not participate were not showing signs of weakness by not physically resisting; they felt they were adhering to halachah.

Students from the girl’s division of Yeshiva of Spring Valley in Monsey, New York looking at sefarim from pre-war Europe at an exhibit at the Amud Aish Memorial Museum.

JA: Can you tell us a little about the rabbinic leaders who did support the Uprising?

RSF: At one point, rabbis and the leaders in the Warsaw Ghetto (those involved in Zionist and Socialist movements and those who headed social agencies), began to debate creating a resistance to the Nazis. Rabbi Mordechai Glatstein, a young rabbi in the Ghetto who managed to survive the

war and became a rabbi in Pittsburgh (we have some of his artifacts in our archives), was present at some of these meetings. A 1993 op-ed that appeared in The Jewish Chronicle of Pittsburgh, quotes Rabbi Glatstein describing those terrifying days: We had some kind of belief, hope, that the nations of the world who spoke about friendship and social honesty would come and try to help us in some way . . . When Hitler saw that other

When studying the Holocaust, we ask: How did these Jews respond and what does it mean for us? What’s the message for us? This is the traditional way of viewing our history.

nations and their religious leaders were quiet and closed their borders to the Jews, he started the Final Solution, the destruction of European Jewry . . . . We were hiding when [the Warsaw Ghetto Uprising] started. It was organized well. I didn’t fight but instead acted as a lookout. We felt at the time that our uprising was a protest, not only against Germany but against the world. We knew we wouldn’t win, but we were able to fight back for four weeks against German armies with their tanks. France fought for only four weeks, and their entire country collapsed.

That’s a first-hand view of a religious man who participated in the Uprising.

As I mentioned earlier, Rabbi Ziemba supported the Uprising as well. A Jerusalem Post article entitled “The Last Rabbi in the Warsaw Ghetto—Zionist?,”

by Eli Kavon, published in April 2013, stated the following: In a meeting of the Warsaw Jewish leadership in January 1943, Rabbi Continued on p. 68 Spring 5778/2018 JEWISH ACTION

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An Eyewitness Account Dr. Hillel Seidman (1914-1995) was a researcher, author and Chassidic Jew who kept a diary chronicling daily life in the Warsaw Ghetto. Written between July 1942 and January 1943, the diary, miraculously rescued from Nazi hands, records the Ghetto’s last days. Dr. Seidman managed to escape the ghetto in January 1943, and ended up in Vittel, a prison camp in Vichy, France. He secured a false Paraguayan passport and survived the war, one of only twelve prisoners to survive Vittel. He died in 1995.

Loaned to the museum by the Seidman family, the diary provides an eyewitness account of life in the Ghetto and attests to the extraordinary spiritual heroism of those who perished. Below are excerpts from Dr. Seidman’s diary:

July 19, 1942 - Meeting of Activists a nd Personalities With rumors of impending mass “resettlement” beginning again . . . a top secret meeting of activists and personalities gathered . . . the first item on the agenda was: Were the frightening rumors at all accurate? . . .The optimists argued that our strength lies in our sheer numbers.

Warsaw itself is a force to be reckoned with. They would not dare destroy half a million people! Various suggestions are put forward: Maybe we should collect huge sums of money or many kilos of gold to bribe the Gestapo . . . Perhaps we should consider setting up many factories and workshops to show Jews as a productive element and thus save them from deportation. Rabbi Yosef Konigsberg . . . and Rabbi Zisha Friedman propose sending a courier to Switzerland to alert World Opinion . . . We must persuade the Pope to publicize a special appeal. We must . . . We should . . . Slowly but surely realization dawns on the gathering that all our plans are unrealistic, impossible to carry out . . .

July 21, 1942 - The Gestapo Prepares for Deportations Crowds fight for labor cards . . . Everybody rushes back and forth seeking employment in the workshops . . . Men seek social marriage certificates to protect their wives, since there is also a rumor that those holding marriage 66

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certificates will not be deported . . .

Incidentally, in the house of Rabbi Yitzchak Meir Kanal at 6 Twarda Street are also large crowds busily getting married! Bachelors who have work cards marry women who have no work, to save them from deportation. These mass marriages are conducted in great haste . . . Women still unmarried seek “husbands.” The ancient prophesy rings true: “And on that day seven women will clutch at one man saying

we will eat our own bread, wear our own clothes, just allow your name to protect us” [Isaiah 4:1].

The Night of Tears Crossing our courtyard I notice our small shtiebl. . . . About twenty men sit on upturned benches—it’s Tisha B’Av tonight! Two flickering candles at the temporary amud dimly light up the bent heads, with their eyes staring into the far distance, as that heartrending tune wells up: “Eichah . . .” the tune that was perhaps first composed at the exile from Jerusalem and has since absorbed the tears of generations . . . How true, how real those ancient lamentations read; how accurate they describe our present catastrophe. That was when it all started, when we were driven from our land and lost our sovereignty 1,872 years ago. Today is but another link in a long chain.

August 12, 1942 - Death March of Korczak’s Orphans Today he was ordered to “vacate” the orphanage. Korczak himself could really stay, since doctors are considered essential, and the Judenrat still retains enough clout

A creased piece of jacket lining that Dr. Hillel Seidman smuggled out while he was in the Vittel internment camp in Vichy, France. Dr. Seidman cut this piece from the lining of his jacket and wrote on it a desperate plea for rescue. He smuggled it out with the help of a non-Jewish woman who sent it to Rabbi Yaakov Rosenheim in New York. Written partly in Hebrew and partly in English, the note begs for passports.

to save him. But Korczak refuses to save himself alone. He cannot bear to leave his orphans and decides to accompany them on their final journey . . . All the children assemble in front of the orphanage on Sliska Street—so many children, from the almost adult to the very tiny—and though they are starved and weak they remain disciplined and well behaved . . . All eyes follow the “doctor”; with him at their side they feel almost safe. Korczak attends to his children with a frightening intensity: he buttons up the coat of one child, straightens the cap of a second and adjusts the satchel of a third—then he goes up to another child and carefully wipes away his tears . . . The column of children begins to move, marching to their unknown destination . . . Who knows how much potential, skill, talent, and Jewish treasures are contained within these precious young souls, now condemned to death . . . At their head marches Janusz Korczak—the symbol of selfless love and charity overwhelmed by the cruel and evil enemy who knows no mercy.

August 27, 1942 - On the Death March And so we sat—squashed, hungry, and completely cowed—all of us had surrendered to total despondency and apathy . . . Suddenly, my elderly, white-bearded neighbor with his tallis and tefillin straightened up and began to speak: at first quietly, but soon with growing strength . . . Jews, do not worry yourselves! Do not fall prey to depression or sadness. Can’t you see we are marching towards Mashiach? Can’t you see that? If only I had a glass of mashkeh, I would drink a lechaim, here and now! Lechaim Yidden!” . . . .

Hoshana Rabbah, October 2, 1942 - Torah and Avodah at One Bench I arrive at the Schultz factory when the assembled “workers” are davening and reciting Hoshanos.

The Schultz works now “employ” the cream of Orthodoxy—Chassidic rebbes, rabbanim, talmidei chachamim, religious activists, and prominent Chassidim. At one

workbench, officially repairing shoes . . . sits Rabbi Aryeh Zvi Frumer, formerly rosh yeshivah at Chachmei Lublin. He might be sitting here but his mind is miles away; his lips are constantly moving, obviously he is studying Torah by heart. Every so often, he throws a question to his neighbor opposite, Rabbi Kalonymus Kalmish Shapira of Piaseczno, author of the Chovos HaTalmidim, and they begin a whispered dialogue in Talmudic study quoting Chazal and posekim. The spirits of the Rishonim and Acharonim hover above this workbench—for these “shoemakers” are really geonim and Talmudic giants. Who worries about the German overseers or the SS? Rapidly, they forget the continual hunger, the ongoing persecution and oppression, the ever-present threat of death. They are no longer in a factory at 46 Nowolipie Street, but inside the Temple’s Hewn Chamber at a sitting of the Sanhedrin.

While some succumb to their maltreatment, these gedolim rise to new spiritual heights . . .

A page of Dr. Hillel Seidman’s diary.

[The final entry] January 18, 1943 The First Resistance Nobody puts any trust in German documents and permits. Instead they stow away anywhere they can—in lofts, bunkers, and hiding places . . .

January 14, 1943 A unit of ZOB (Zydowska Organizacja I remember one famous Chassidic Bojowa— the Jewish Resistance Rebbe once said why the Bais Organization) lives at 7 Wolynska Hamikdash was built on Mount Street. When the Latvians and Moriah rather than Mount Sinai. A Ukrainians approach the building, place where a Jew had been moser a few hand grenades are thrown at nefesh was more important than the them from the windows. A number site where the Torah was revealed. of them are killed, including their And where else had so many Jews SS officer. They immediately panic fallen al kiddush Hashem than these and run blindly in all directions. An roads of the Warsaw Ghetto? Every eerie silence descends on the street. street is a Mount Moriah, every stone Yet all know this cannot last, the an akeidah. If, by some miracle, I Germans won’t give up so easily. survive this madness, perhaps I The Resistance instructs all Jews should bring a stone from Nalewki to leave the street immediately, and Street to Eretz Yisrael and place it everybody evacuates the area. As alongside the Kosel Maaravi. When darkness falls, a few SS arrive. They Jews come on pilgrimage to that proceed down the street holding sacred site, they could also weep electric pocket torches, which they over this stone for the loss of all shine at every apartment entrance their loved ones, for the destruction as they pass . . . There is no hope, of a large segment of Klal Yisrael. no escape, nowhere to hide. And They will bewail the extinction of a the merciless enemy seeks to central powerhouse in Judaism— destroy everything.

Polish Jewry—as they mourn the churban of the holy Temple.

Text courtesy of the Seidman family.

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Continued from p. 65

The Nazis made it very clear that any act of revolt would result in consequences for the others.

So halachically, what was one allowed to do?

Ziemba declared that traditional martyrdom in the face of persecution was no longer a viable response. He argued that “sanctification of the Divine Name” must manifest itself in resistance to the enemy. “In the present,” Ziemba told the ghetto leaders, “we are faced by an arch foe, whose unparalleled ruthlessness and total annihilation purposes know no bounds.

Halachah [Jewish law] demands that we fight and resist to the very end with unequaled determination and valor for the sake of Sanctification of the Divine Name.”

He was stating very clearly that his view regarding the Uprising was a product of his halachic opinion. Others felt that it was not halachically correct.

JA: Esther Farbstein, a Chareidi Holocaust scholar and educator, writes in her book Hidden in Thunder: Perspectives on Faith, Halachah and Leadership during the Holocaust that the Radzyner Rebbe, Rabbi Shmuel Shlomo Leiner, “called on Jews to break out of the ghettos, flee to the forests and take up arms.” She also writes about Rabbi Shlomo Dovid Yehoshua Weinberg, the Slonimer Rebbe, who “allowed underground activists to use his basement as an arms cache” and that Rabbi Yehoshua Moshe Aaronson, 68

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who was held in the Konin labor camp, “supported a plan by the inmates to take revenge against German soldiers. ‘Let us at least defend Jewish honor and avenge our spilled blood,’ wrote Aaronson. The plan was never carried out, however, and Aaronson expressed sorrow at having missed the opportunity for vengeance and rebellion.” How would you respond to that?

RSF: It’s important to put things into context here. We’re talking about a period where we could never imagine what people were going through; however, one common thread among all the quotes [by the various rabbinic personalities in the Ghetto] is that they were all seeking Divine guidance. They were all predicating their opinion or their stance upon what they felt the Torah was dictating or guiding them to do. Those who supported forms of physical resistance felt just as strongly that halachah had room for it as those who were against it.

JA: Is there anything documented about the encouragement the resistance movement gave to the remaining Jews when they saw that they were able to defy the enemy?

RSF: We don’t have a lot of material because after the Uprising everything was destroyed. The entire Ghetto was razed to the ground.

JA: How did the situation engender unity among various groups of Jews?

RSF: It’s a good question. Often people think there were only two camps: the non-religious and the religious camps, as if the non-religious Jews were all working together. However, even amongst the resistance fighters there was a difference of opinion. There were different factions, different approaches of how to actually resist the Nazis.

Some factions believed the approach should be more aggressive, others felt it should be more clandestine, some wanted more of a surprise attack, others more of an upfront attack. While it’s difficult to comment on the achdus that occurred during the Uprising,

despite the different groups, I would venture to say that any situation like that is automatically going to bring people together.

Learning about the Holocaust engenders a certain feeling of achdus among all Jews. Because no matter how we live our lives, no matter what our religious convictions are, we all share a common experience. And I think that’s something that we see here in our museum. Even though we are focused on telling the Orthodox side of the Holocaust narrative, nonreligious Jews who visit our museum are very taken by what we have to say.

At the end of the day we’re all Jews, we’re all targeted and we all have what to learn from this. It’s part of our collective experience.

Note 1. Ed. Note: On November 3, 1943, SS and police units implemented Aktion Erntefest (Operation Harvest Festival), the murder of the Jewish laborers in concentration camp Lublin/Majdanek and the forcedlabor camps Trawniki and Poniatowa.

Uprisings at the Treblinka and Sobibor killing centers and the Warsaw, Bialystok, and Vilna ghettos had led to increased concerns about Jewish resistance. To prevent further resistance, SS Chief Heinrich Himmler ordered the killing of surviving Jews in the Lublin District of German-occupied Poland. Most of the remaining Jews were employed in forced-labor projects and were concentrated in the Trawniki (at least 4,000), Poniatowa (at least 11,000), and Majdanek (about 18,000) camps.

They were killed. At Majdanek, near Lublin, the SS shot them in large prepared ditches outside the camp fence near the crematorium. Jews from other labor camps in the Lublin area were also taken to Majdanek and shot. Music was played through loudspeakers at both Majdanek and Trawniki to drown out the noise of the mass shootings. The killing at Majdanek was the largest single-day, single-location massacre during the Holocaust [ushmm.org].

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REVIEW ESSAY

Torah from the Years of Wrath: The Historical Context of the Aish Kodesh

By Dr. Henry Abramson CreateSpace Independent Publishing Platform New York, 2017 277 pages

Reviewed by Josh Rosenfeld

S

peaking of the Holocaust, the German writer W.G. Sebald wrote, “no serious person ever thinks of anything else.” While the specifics of Sebald’s well-known aside may be up for debate, one thing is certain: much of contemporary Jewish life still exists in the overwhelming shadow of “that which happened.” Attempts at grappling with the theological void opened up in the wake of European Jewry’s annihilation are either ex post facto, written with the distance of a number of years, or instead draw upon the traditional library of Jewish theodicies.

Rare indeed is the book known as Aish Kodesh, by now synonymous with its sainted author, the martyr Rabbi Kalonymus Kalmish Shapira of Piaseczno (1889-1943). Discovered after the war in a rusted milkcan, this precious sefer represents one of only a handful of Torah works composed amidst the cacophony of destruction. A collection of derashot (Torah homilies) delivered within the darkness of the

Warsaw Ghetto, the result is one of the most important sustained engagements with the problem of evil and hester panim (when God conceals His presence) in Jewish history. Aish Kodesh has become a definitive document not only of Holocaust theology but of the Jewish response to suffering in general.

Published from that hidden manuscript in 1960, and again in a slightly revised edition in 2007, the sefer witnessed a popularity that has grown along with a resurgence in scholarly interest in the figure of the Piaseczner Rebbe and his written ouevre. Much of this contemporary interest is due to teachers like Rabbi Moshe Weinberger, who named his synagogue in Woodmere, New York after the given title of the book. In his approbation to the book under review, Rabbi Weinberger testifies that Aish Kodesh has not left his desk in Aish Kodesh for forty years.

One of the hallmarks of Aish Kodesh is the almost total lack of direct reference to the surrounding reality.

In this respect it is sui generis, and the book retains an air of mystery alongside its mysticism, with the Rebbe refusing to name that which cannot be named.

To be sure, oblique references to the daily horrors of ghetto life permeate nearly every sermon, often deftly tied to the weekly Torah portion

Rabbi Josh Rosenfeld, a musmach of the Rabbi Isaac Elchanan Theological Seminary, is the assistant rabbi at Lincoln Square Synagogue and serves on the Judaic studies faculty of SAR High School in Riverdale, New York.

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or holiday. Dr. Henry Abramson, a historian and dean at Touro College, has entered that void; the result is a deeply engaging, enlightening and sometimes heartbreaking scholarly work that attempts to situate the Rebbe’s sermons in the historical context from which they were delivered. Through contemporary accounts of ghetto life from primary sources—the diary of Adam Czerniakow, head of the Warsaw Judenrat; the secret Ringelblum Oneg Shabbat Archives; and eyewitness testimony of survivors along with other historical data—Dr. Abramson is able to piece together the events that influenced the Rebbe’s Torah as originally delivered to those Jews in the ghetto, who would gather around for encouragement, inspiration and hope.

Dr. Abramson draws from the full range of available scholarship on the Piaseczner Rebbe, especially the groundbreaking work of Rabbi Dr. Daniel Reiser of Herzog Academic College, who recently published a two-volume “critical” edition of the sermons, correcting many errors that had crept into the text. In Dr. Abramson’s work, studies of the individual sermons, presented in chronological order, are sandwiched between a welcome overview of the Rebbe’s biography and prewar writings and a concluding chapter exploring the faith of the Rebbe himself.

Aside from being a work of serious historical scholarship, Torah from the Years of Wrath is also a labor of love, the result of years of close study. In the afterword, Dr. Abramson quotes from Professor Nehemia Polen, described as “the father of Piaseczno studies”: There are many reasons this work was slow to reach completion. Not the least of these was my difficulty in gazing at the awesome pain of that period for extended lengths of time . . . I must confess at this point my unbounded admiration for Rabbi Shapira’s achievement, for if I had difficulty confronting a topic at a remove of almost fifty years, what inner strength did it take to maintain a stable center and communicate a luminous vision of faith, while in the heart of darkness itself?

A collection of derashot delivered within the darkness of the Warsaw Ghetto, the result is one of the most important sustained engagements with the problem of evil and hester panim in Jewish history.

The import of Dr. Abramson’s work is to bridge the gap of all those years, bringing us closer to the terrible tragedies and events that the Rebbe is responding to.

Whereas previous study of Aish Kodesh was limited to the general idea that this Torah was communicated during the horrors of the Holocaust, we can now understand to varying degrees of terrifying specificity the exact nature of the “heart of darkness” within which the Rebbe is speaking. To a similar extent, we may also know what accounts for the gaps in the sermons that characterize Aish Kodesh as well. The result is very challenging, even painful, and one wonders if the Rebbe deliberately obscured these historical details, what value there is in uncovering them.

In recreating the context of the sermons, not a single detail is overlooked. Dr. Abramson hones in on textual emendations, manuscript details, even changes in handwriting. Ultimately, two sefarim emerge: one abstract work of Chassidut composed with an eye toward the problem of evil called Aish Kodesh; and another, Torah from the Years of Wrath, revealing the immense spiritual heroism of a tzaddik and his Torah amidst the specific details of suffering in the Warsaw Ghetto between the years of 1939 and 1943.

Finally, Dr. Abramson reveals that simply situating Aish Kodesh within the historical context of the Holocaust and the Warsaw Ghetto is insufficient. In the first four chapters analyzing the Piaseczner’s biography and prewar writings, Dr. Abramson also demonstrates that the true setting for the sermons that became the Rebbe’s name are those educational writings which evidence such boundless love for every Jew, especially children. Together with the painstaking historical work, Torah from the Years of Wrath allows us to appreciate the Piaseczner and Aish Kodesh in a profound new way, an achievement so desperately vital as the living memory of the Holocaust begins to succumb to history.

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JUST BETWEEN US

FACING POVERTY Dear Neighbor, Living in a frenetic city like New York, with homeless people found on nearly every street corner, it’s remarkably easy to become desensitized to the plight of the poor and disadvantaged. Sure, we may share a dollar or two when the spirit moves us, but much like the occasional gifts of tzedakah we send to our favorite philanthropies and mosdot, the recipients of our generosity tend to be hidden away from our day-to-day reality. Indeed, much in the same way city-dwellers no longer hear the city’s blaring sirens and honking taxis, most of us no longer see the poor among us.

As an Orthodox Jew who is highly educated and, until recently, considered “upwardly mobile,” I suspect my perception of the poor was fairly typical. Once or twice a year, I would contribute to the pushkahs of various tzedakah organizations that my children would bring home from school. From as far back as I can remember, I have

been conditioned to place a few coins in the pushkah during Shacharit. Similarly, I would contribute during Neilah, and make the occasional donation to charity when I received an aliyah. I would proudly contribute to my shul’s campaigns prior to Pesach and other holidays. And like so many of my friends, my generosity was often limited by the sticker shock of living life as an observant Jew (especially the high cost of yeshivah tuition, summer camp and my hyper-inflated mortgage).

My understanding of poverty is radically different these days. Being on the receiving end of tzedakah for the past eleven months as an unemployed Jewish communal professional has not only grayed me prematurely, it has also afforded me insights that might not have occurred to me otherwise. I offer this window into my life not to elicit sympathy (although a few job offers would be nice), but rather as a follow-up to an article I published in a local Jewish

Being on the receiving end of tzedakah for the past eleven months as an unemployed Jewish communal professional has not only grayed me prematurely, it has also afforded me insights that might not have occurred to me otherwise.

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newspaper almost a year ago, which included a few important prescriptives to address the scourge of poverty in the Orthodox community.

In the article, I suggested a four-pronged approach. First, I recommended that our day schools and yeshivot need to take a more proactive role in guiding our children toward careers that are capable of supporting an Orthodox lifestyle. Even if there’s merit to raising our children to believe they can be “anything they want to be when they grow up,” which is not my personal philosophy, there’s nothing noble about encouraging our children in their pursuit of professions that are either beyond their reach or will have them living from paycheck to paycheck.

Second, many of our children would be better served attending a trade school or para-professional program after high school instead of a liberal arts college— they should graduate with a marketable and monetizable skill.

Third, and I suspect this was the hardest pill for most to swallow, the wealthier among us should consider forgoing annual vacations and extra indulgences and instead send generous checks of support to their community’s yeshivot, rabbis’ funds, and tzedakah organizations that assist the needy.

Due to the unfortunate predicament I find myself in, I have a newfound appreciation for the need to keep these institutions well-funded.

Fourth, our shuls should organize their membership to take an active role in helping the unemployed. Perhaps each shul should start a LinkedIn page that its members should be encouraged to join. Unemployed shul members

The wealthier among us should consider forgoing annual vacations and extra indulgences and instead send generous checks of support to their community’s yeshivot, rabbis’ funds, and tzedakah organizations that assist the needy. could then refer to the LinkedIn page to find other shul members employed in the same industry.

In the months that have passed since the article was published, I have submitted countless resumés to would-be employers and have gone on a mind-numbing number of job interviews. Despite my best faith efforts, I am still an unemployed Jewish communal professional with nothing more to show for two decades of selfless devotion to the klal than a resumé laden with professional and educational accomplishments. I would consider leaving the New York area, but Jewish communal jobs are still more plentiful here. It is in this spirit that I offer another insight that centers on a highly publicized event in my community, which boasted of a novel solution to the unemployment and under-employment crisis in the Orthodox community.

Taking my seat alongside hundreds of other college-educated men and women of nearly every age who flooded the standing-room only event, I listened for a full hour and a half as panelist after panelist extolled the virtues of working in the tech industry. The panelists, each of whom held senior management positions at top tech firms such as Google, LinkedIn and Adobe, spoke of the high salaries, the many perks they enjoyed, the relaxed work environment and the free kosher lunches and dinners they were served. As the event came to a close, the facilitators invited those of us in attendance to sign up to attend one of three intensive twelve-week technology boot camp training programs they were offering that would provide the intrepid among us with the necessary

skills to acquire a lucrative (this word was repeated frequently) career in the technology field . . . all for the ever-sosmall price of $16,000! Gasp! The sticker shock cut the crowd like a knife. Perhaps the technology boot camp would deliver on its promise, but it surely wasn’t an option for a great many of us who are struggling to get by.

And so, my Orthodox brothers and sisters, I offer my fifth insight.

Rather than allow businesses like the one described above to prey on the vulnerable unemployed, we need to take a page out of the handbook of Girls Who Code, the much-celebrated nonprofit that aims at increasing the number of women in the high-tech industry.

Founded in 2012, Girls Who Code, believing that computing skills are a critical path to security and prosperity in today’s job market, offers free technology boot camps to high school girls. At present, there are more than 150 Girls Who Code clubs across North America, and the organization aims to engage one million girls by 2020! Equally impressive, the organization receives significant corporate donations from firms including AT&T, IBM, Microsoft and Amazon. By December 2014, 3,000 students had completed the Girls Who Code program, 95 percent of whom went on to major in computer science at university.

We need to replicate this program for the Orthodox community. We need to develop free or low-cost boot camps in technology and other well-paying trades that offer the promise of a brighter economic future for those of us who are willing to commit to the intensive educational regimen. We must not

delude ourselves into accepting for-profit alternatives. And we must not confuse this initiative with those sponsored by degree-granting colleges and universities. I suspect most of us who would participate in such a communitysponsored initiative have already paid a considerable sum for degrees that took us nowhere.

Only a few years back, the Jewish community was in convulsions when the financial industry tanked and many of our white-collar brethren were unemployed. Although it’s all but forgotten today, many shuls quickly cobbled together web sites to assist their congregants in posting and locating jobs.

At the same time, many Federationfunded agencies offered resuméwriting workshops, cash assistance and mental health assistance for those who were suffering from depression and despondency. Most of these initiatives are all but gone today, despite the steady stream of studies sponsored by local federations and the Metropolitan Council on Jewish Poverty showing the ever-increasing pervasiveness of poverty in the Jewish community. Certainly, little is being done of any consequence for the middle-class.

It’s time to come together and help chart a new path that will help those of us who are falling through the cracks.

We can’t hold on much longer.

Although this article was submitted anonymously to protect the author’s identity, the author shared that he lives with his wife and children in New York. To reach the author or to send feedback, e-mail the Jewish Action office at ja@ou.org.

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PESACH

MAKING A SEDER FOR THE POST-MILLENNIAL GENERATION

By Steve Lipman

G

etting and keeping the attention of people of any age during a Seder, a meal with a surfeit of readings and rituals that can stretch over several hours, is always difficult. But it is particularly challenging for teenagers and young adults at the table.

Boys and girls of high school and college age typically have short attention spans, and the time spent engaging with Facebook, YouTube and other immediate-gratification applications shortens their attention spans even more.

Today’s Seder leader is faced with the somewhat daunting task of engaging young peoples’ attention through verbal, tactile and other non-electronic means.

Below is some Seder advice from teens, college students and educators familiar with the ways of Generation Z: J Make the youth your Seder priority. Spend more time with them that night than with the adults. If the youngsters enjoy the Seder, so will their parents and other adults.

J Do your homework. Teens are not monolithic. If someone in the thirteen-to-nineteen age group will be at your Seder table, find out about his personality and interests and gear part of the Seder’s content and approach to him.

Relate the evening’s themes to topics that interest the teen, whether that’s sports, entertainment or some other au courant topic. Prepare questions that link the teen’s interests to something in the Haggadah.

J Let them sit together. While parents may prefer to have their teenage children sit with the rest of the family, teens often prefer to sit with their peers, whom they may not see often outside of school. The year I led a Seder for a secular Jewish community in rural New Hampshire, fifteen children—mostly teens—sat at a separate kids table to great success. They enjoyed each other’s company and were more engaged in the proceedings because of it.

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J Let them wander. Some parents find it useful to let their bored youngsters step away from a Shabbat table; a Seder is even longer. If teens take a break from the proceedings, they’re likely to come back energized.

J Keep it short. All-nighters might be okay for last-minute study sessions, but few folks— especially teens and young adults—like it at the Seder. After midnight, their attention is sure to flag.

J Minimize the reading. Instead, maximize the summaries, explanations and questions. “Teens like to discuss,” says sixteen-year-old Gideon Fox who attends a Jewish high school in New Jersey. “They want to contribute,” beyond taking part in around-the-table reading. So give out assignments! Judaica. com’s JLiving blog advises giving teens “turns running the Seder.” When they can lead parts of the Seder, “it will be much more meaningful, memorable and fun.”

J Surprise your teens. Julie Wittert of Kew Gardens Hills in Queens, New York fondly remembers a Seder she attended where the leader made hieroglyphic ID tags for each teen. The tags in the language of ancient Egypt made each teen feel special.

J Present a question on the first night to be answered the second night. Ask a probing question like, “What would you pack if you had to leave your home on a moment’s notice with just the space of a small backpack?” This question Continued on p. 76 Steve Lipman, a staff writer at the New York Jewish Week, is writing a Haggadah/leader’s guide to the Seder based on his fifteen years of experience as a volunteer Seder leader in small Jewish communities, mostly in formerly Communist countries.

Seder Pointers

By Sharona Kaplan

• Road Map. Begin by telling all of the Seder participants what to expect—what time we plan to eat and what time we plan to end. This helps all assembled feel more in control and not hostage to an overzealous leader.

• Get Them Talking! Everyone has something to offer, and that will make them feel that they belong.

Leverage this at Mah Nishtanah by having guests ask one of the questions in any language they know (including sign language!).

This way they are contributing something unique to the Seder.

• Spread the Wealth. Not every devar Torah has to be on Maggid!

There is plenty to talk about after the meal and people tend to be more engaged when their stomachs are full.

• Tradition, Tradition! Things that people can look forward to year after year (customs, props, tunes, food) offer familiarity and nostalgia.

• Include Everyone/Reach Out. Pouring wine, passing out karpas and opening the door for Eliyahu can be comfortable honors for the uninitiated when framed correctly.

• Use Props. Things to look at, touch and feel engage all the senses and provide stimulation for all different types of learners. The Seder plate components, shtick for the makkot, even making a big deal of pouring wine for your neighbor are all ways to teach outside of the text.

Sharona Kaplan is an OU-JLIC educator at UCLA and a member of OU-JLIC's senior management team.

She and her husband, Rabbi Aryeh Kaplan, have run communal Seders at UCLA for twelve years.

Courtesy of Rachel Berkowitz

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Continued from p. 74

Ask teens how they would communicate the message of freedom “in a way that people will respond . . .

What #hashtag would you use? What would your 140-character message be?” makes the Exodus experience personal and is always applicable, particularly in a year when natural disasters like floods or hurricanes dominate the news. Everyone’s seen images of families forced to make such decisions.

The question allows everyone to express their personality and priorities, and can offer insight into how the teen at your table thinks.

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J Don’t ignore the second half of the Seder. The latenight, post-meal part with few Pesach-specific readings or rituals can tend to be a rush job. That’s a mistake. Plan some creative activities or thought-provoking questions that will leave good memories and a warm feeling in the participants’ minds.

J Don’t overlook the second Seder. It’s not just an obligation for Jews in the Diaspora, a carbon copy of the first-night Seder. The second Seder is a chance to innovate, to use a different style, maybe a different Haggadah. It’s an opportunity to dedicate the night to the kids, teens included.

J Use modern music. Jody Dickter, a veteran teacher from West Hempstead, New York who has raised three teenagers, has found it effective to let teens lead the singing of the traditional Seder songs to melodies of their generation.

J Be creative. Jewish educator Ruth Schapira suggests linking social media to Pesach by asking teens how they would communicate the message of freedom “in a way that people will respond. Think of Facebook, Instagram and Twitter. What #hashtag would you use? What would your 140-character message be?”

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CHEF TABLE

COOKBOOK AUTHORS SHARE PASSOVER FAVORITES

By Norene Gilletz

Roasted Butternut Squash and Quinoa Salad

Reproduced from Real Life Kosher Cooking by Miriam Pascal, with permission from the copyright holders ArtScroll/Shaar Press Publications, LTD

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I

f you’re looking for inspiration when planning your Pesach menus, these delicious dishes shared by some of my favorite kosher cookbook authors are perfect for Passover. Their family-friendly recipes are

non-gebrochts, making them ideal for anyone who follows a gluten-free diet. As an added benefit, they’re very versatile, so you can use the various components to create additional innovative dishes.

Roasted Butternut Squash and Quinoa Salad Adapted from Miriam Pascal’s Real Life Kosher Cooking (ArtScroll/Shaar Press) Yields 6-8 servings Miriam Pascal originally created this salad for Rosh Hashanah and filled it with symbolic Rosh Hashanah foods.

It’s been a fan favorite ever since.

1 small butternut squash, peeled, cut into small cubes 2 tablespoons olive oil 1 tablespoon honey 1 teaspoon kosher salt 1/4 teaspoon black pepper 1 1/2 cups raw quinoa, cooked according to package directions 3 scallions, finely sliced Seeds of 1 large pomegranate Dressing: 1/2 cup olive oil 1/4 cup red wine vinegar 2 tablespoons honey 1 1/2 teaspoon kosher salt Prepare the butternut squash: Preheat oven to 400°F (200°C). Line a baking sheet with parchment paper.

Toss butternut squash with oil, honey, salt and pepper. Spread in a single layer on prepared baking sheet.

Roast for 40 minutes, stirring halfway through. Remove from oven and set aside to cool.

Norene Gilletz is the leading author of kosher cookbooks in Canada.

Assemble salad: Combine quinoa with prepared butternut squash, scallions and pomegranate seeds.

Prepare the dressing: In a small bowl, whisk together all dressing ingredients until smooth.

Pour dressing over salad; stir until all components are evenly coated.

Norene’s Notes • Variation: If you can’t get fresh pomegranate seeds, use dried cranberries instead. You can also use sweet potato instead of butternut squash.

• Plan Ahead: Salad can be stored in the fridge for up to two days.

This salad actually tastes best after marinating for a day, when its flavors have had a chance to develop.

Red Quinoa Meatballs with Spaghetti Squash Adapted from Paula Shoyer’s The Healthy Jewish Kitchen: Fresh, Contemporary Recipes for Every Occasion (Sterling Epicure) Yields 12 meatballs This recipe is one of Paula Shoyer’s favorites in this book—these meatballs won over friends who don’t even like quinoa. You can even sprinkle cheese on top of these “meatballs.” You can also prepare the spaghetti squash and tomato sauce as a side dish with another main.

Spaghetti Squash: 1 large spaghetti squash, sliced in half the long way, seeded 1 tablespoon extra-virgin olive oil

Quinoa Meatballs: 3/4 cup (130 g) red quinoa 1 1/2 cups (360 ml) water 2 tablespoons + 1 teaspoon extra virgin olive oil, divided 1 onion, finely chopped 3 cloves garlic, crushed 1/2 teaspoon dried basil 1/2 teaspoon dried oregano 2 large eggs 2 tablespoons quinoa flour (or potato starch) 4 teaspoons finely chopped fresh Italian parsley 1/8 teaspoon salt 1/4 teaspoon black pepper Tomato Sauce: 2 tablespoons extra virgin olive oil 1 medium onion, chopped 8 cloves garlic, chopped 1/4 teaspoon dried basil 1/4 teaspoon dried oregano 1/4 teaspoon salt or more to taste 1/4 teaspoon black pepper Pinch sugar 1 28-ounce (795 g) can crushed tomatoes 1/2 cup (120 ml) water To make the spaghetti squash, preheat the oven to 375°F (190°C). Drizzle squash halves with oil and place the cut side down on a jelly roll pan. Bake the squash for 45 to 50 minutes, or until it is fork-tender. Let cool. Use a fork to scrape the squash into a large bowl. Set aside until you’re ready to serve.

To make the meatballs, place the quinoa and water in a small saucepan and bring it to a boil over high heat.

Cover the pan, reduce the heat to low, and simmer for 15 minutes, or until all of the water has been absorbed. Let the quinoa cool 15 minutes.

While the quinoa is cooking, heat 2 tablespoons of oil in a medium frying pan over medium-low heat. Add the onions and cook for 5 to 7 minutes, or until soft and starting to brown. Add the garlic and the remaining teaspoon of oil to the pan and cook for another 3 minutes. Transfer to a large bowl and let cool for 10 minutes.

Add the cooled quinoa to the bowl with the onions and garlic. Add the basil, oregano, eggs, quinoa flour and parsley and mix well. Add salt and Spring 5778/2018 JEWISH ACTION

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pepper and mix well.

Pour some water into a small bowl.

Dip your hands in the water and then scoop up about 3 tablespoons of the quinoa mixture and shape into a ball.

Press the ball tightly and put it on a plate. Wet your hands before shaping each meatball. Chill the meatballs in the fridge for at least 1 hour and up to overnight.

To make the sauce, heat the oil in a medium saucepan over medium heat.

Add onions and cook for 5 minutes.

Add the garlic and cook for another 5 minutes. Add the basil, oregano, salt, pepper, and sugar and stir. Add the tomatoes and water and bring the mixture to a boil. Reduce the heat to low and simmer the sauce, covered, for 25 minutes.

Preheat the oven to 400°F (200°C).

Put 2 tablespoons of olive oil onto a jelly roll pan and heat in the oven for 2 to 3 minutes. Carefully place the meatballs on the hot pan and bake for 25 to 30 minutes, or until firm.

To serve, reheat the squash and sauce.

Using tongs, place some squash on a plate, ladle some sauce over it, then add the meatballs and more sauce, if desired.

Pesto Chicken and Potatoes Adapted from Miriam Pascal’s Real Life Kosher Cooking (ArtScroll/Shaar Press) Yields 6-8 servings The bright, fresh flavors of this family favorite are reminiscent of a warm summer day, but that doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy it all year round, especially on Passover. Thanks to the shortcut basil pesto, it’s a snap to make this chicken. And that built-in side dish is an extra bonus!

Pesto Chicken and Potatoes

Reproduced from Real Life Kosher Cooking by Miriam Pascal, with permission from the copyright holders ArtScroll/ Shaar Press Publications, LTD

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Shortcut Pesto: 1/2 cup olive oil 1/4 cup lemon juice 20 cubes frozen basil 4–5 cloves garlic, finely minced (or 4 cubes frozen garlic) 1 1/2–2 teaspoons kosher salt, or to taste 1/2 teaspoon black pepper

Chicken and Potatoes: 2 lb baby red potatoes 2–3 small red onions, cut into thin strips 3 lb chicken, bone-in (Miriam prefers thighs, but you can use your favorite.)

In a small bowl, stir together pesto ingredients until combined.

Preheat oven to 400°F (200°C). Boil the potatoes in salted water for about 20 minutes, until fork tender. Cool; cut each potato in half and place into a 9x13-inch pan. Toss 2 tablespoons pesto and about 1/4 of the onion strips with the potatoes.

Spread a bit of pesto on the top and bottom of each piece of chicken, then place chicken in the pan, on top of the potatoes. Reserve about 1/2 of the pesto mixture.

Spread remaining onions over the chicken. Cover pan tightly; bake, covered, for 45 minutes.

Uncover pan. Spoon reserved pesto over the chicken; bake, uncovered, for an additional 45–55 minutes, until the chicken is cooked through and is starting to brown on the edges.

Norene’s Notes Plan Ahead: Although this chicken is best prepared the day you serve it, you can prepare it up to a day or two ahead of time, then reheat, uncovered, until heated through.

Potato Schnitzel Adapted from Amy Stopnicki’s Kosher Taste: Plan, Prepare, Plate (Feldheim) Yields 4–6 servings Try this schnitzel once and you will love it always. The potato pancake mix is the key ingredient here. Alternately, try it with potato flakes for your coating.

If you want to try something different, you can use veal cutlets instead of chicken breasts.

2 lb boneless chicken breasts, approximately 8 chicken breasts 2 tablespoons dried parsley flakes 1/2 teaspoon paprika 1/2 teaspoon garlic powder 1 1/2–2 cups dry potato pancake mix

Salt and pepper to taste 3 eggs, lightly beaten Oil for frying

1/2 teaspoon salt 2 oz (55 g) bittersweet chocolate Fresh raspberries, for garnish (optional)

Place the chicken between 2 sheets of heavy plastic (re-sealable freezer bags work well) on a solid, level surface.

Firmly pound with a meat mallet to a thickness of 1/4-inch.

On a large plate or in a shallow bowl, combine parsley flakes, paprika, garlic powder, potato pancake mix, salt and pepper.

Pour eggs into another large plate or shallow bowl.

In a large skillet, heat oil over medium-high heat.

Meanwhile, dip chicken into egg, then potato flake mixture.

Cook chicken in heated oil, turning once or until both sides are golden brown and chicken is cooked through.

Glaze (optional): 5 oz (140 g) bittersweet chocolate 1 tablespoon sunflower or safflower oil 1 teaspoon Passover vanilla extract

Place the quinoa and water into a small saucepan and bring it to a boil over medium heat. Reduce the heat to low, cover the saucepan, and cook the quinoa for 15 minutes, or until all the liquid has been absorbed. Set the pan aside. The quinoa may be made 1 day in advance.

Preheat the oven to 350°F (180°C).

Use cooking spray to grease a 12-cup (2.8L) Bundt pan. Sprinkle the potato starch over the greased pan and then shake the pan to remove any excess starch.

Place the quinoa in the bowl of a food Norene’s Notes processor. Add the orange juice, eggs, • To Plate: Serve this as a main dish vanilla, oil, sugar, cocoa, baking powder with potatoes and salad. When you and salt and process until the mixture is serve this on Pesach, your family very smooth. won’t even know it’s not chametz!

Melt the chocolate over a double boiler, or place in a medium Chocolate Quinoa Cake microwave-safe bowl, and put in a microwave for 45 seconds, stirring and Adapted from Paula Shoyer’s The then heating the chocolate for another Healthy Jewish Kitchen: Fresh, 30 seconds, until it is melted. Add the Contemporary Recipes for Every chocolate to the quinoa batter and Occasion (Sterling Epicure) process until well mixed. Pour Yields 12 servings To the batter into the prepared Bundt advertise in theofnext issue pan of and bake it for 50 minutes, or Paula Shoyer had heard the myth until a skewer inserted into the cake chocolate cakes made with cooked comes out clean. quinoa and didn’t quite believe Let the cake cool for 10 minutes and they’d actually be tasty. This cake is then remove it gently from the pan. Let surprisingly moist and delicious—great it cool on a wire cooling rack. for Passover and all year round.please contact To make the glaze, melt the chocolate Joseph Jacobs in a large microwave-safe bowl in the Cake: Advertising microwave or over a double boiler. Add 3/4 cup (130 g) quinoa at 201.591.1713the or oil and vanilla and whisk well. Let 1 1/2 cups (360 ml) water arosenfeld@josephjacobs.org the glaze sit for 5 minutes and then Cooking spray whisk it again. Use a silicone spatula to 2 tablespoons potato starch spread the glaze all over the cake.

1/3 cup (80 ml) orange juice

Jewish

Action

4 large eggs 2 teaspoons Passover vanilla extract 3/4 cup (180 ml) coconut oil 1 1/2 cups (300 g) sugar 1 cup (80 g) dark unsweetened cocoa 2 teaspoons baking powder

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LEGAL-EASE

WHAT’S THE TRUTH ABOUT. . .

EATING A SANDWICH WRAPPED IN A NAPKIN?

By Ari Z. Zivotofsky Misconception: Instead of washing netilat yadayim before eating bread, one could hold a sandwich with a napkin.

Fact: There is a requirement to wash before eating bread and only under certain limited circumstances may one cover one’s hands in lieu of washing.

Background: The obligation to wash one’s hands from a vessel before eating bread1 is an early and important rabbinic enactment that was instituted for a variety of reasons (MB 158:1).

One reason is “srach terumah”— to accustom ourselves to acting in the manner of eating terumah. In clarifying the mishnah (Chagigah 2:5), the Gemara (Chagigah 18b) explains that for chullin (non-holy food) one is required to wash one’s hands prior to eating bread only, and this applies only if one eats it himself; for terumah (tithes, which have holiness and may be eaten only by Kohanim and their families in a state of ritual purity in the time of the Temple) even prior to touching the food one would have to wash his hands. Because of an earlier decree (Shabbat 14b) regulating how tumah (impurity) is transmitted, Kohanim, their wives and their children must wash their hands before touching or eating terumah. Although today Kohanim do not eat terumah, in anticipation that such will change at a moment’s notice, Chazal mandated that everyone wash their hands before eating bread. This applies despite the fact that there is no Mikdash presently, and even to those living outside of the Land of Israel, in order that everyone will be accustomed to this ritual when 82

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the Beit Hamikdash is rebuilt (see Aruch Hashulchan, OC 158:1-3).

Another reason for the requirement to wash one’s hands before eating bread is cleanliness and holiness. The Gemara (Chullin 106a) refers to washing one’s hands as a “mitzvah,” which Tosafot (s.v. mitzvah) explains the rabbis instituted for the purpose of cleanliness.

The Gemara (Berachot 53b) understood the verse (Vayikra 11:44)2 “For I am Hashem, your God, and you shall sanctify yourself ” to be teaching that one must wash one’s hands before eating and reciting the blessing. This washing is an act of cleanliness, and cleanliness leads to purity and purity leads to separation (perishah) and holiness (kedushah). Thus, some hold that if in the middle of the meal one’s hands become soiled—for example after one uses the bathroom—he should wash his hands again, in some cases with a berachah (Shulchan Aruch, OC 164:2; MB 164:13; Teshuvot V’hanhagot 1:168).

An additional reason for washing is because a person’s table affords atonement (by using it for hospitality) just as the altar did (Chagigah 27a).

Therefore, just as the Kohanim washed before beginning their service on the altar, one should wash before approaching his table.

The prescribed method of washing before eating bread is to pour at least one revi’it (about four ounces) of water, all at once, from a vessel onto the unobstructed (Shulchan Aruch, OC 161:1, MB ibid.) right hand, covering the entire hand until the wrist (or at least until the knuckles—Shulchan

Aruch, OC 161:4). If there is sufficient water, one should pour a second time on the right hand (MB 162:21), then repeat on the left hand.3 He should (preferably) rub his hands together (shifshuf; Rema, OC 162:2; MB 162:24), recite the berachah “al netilat yadayim” (Shulchan Aruch and Rema, OC 158:11; Aruch Hashulchan, OC 158:16) and dry his hands (Sotah 4b; MB 158:42). One should not speak or allow for too long a delay between washing and making the blessing of Hamotzi (Shulchan Aruch, OC 166:1); if, however, one did speak but there was no “interruption of thought,” he need not wash again (MB 166:6).

The requirement is to wash both hands, even if one plans on eating with only one. The Mishnah Berurah (158:4) explains that this is because one might accidentally touch the bread with the unwashed hand.4 The Chazon Ish (OC 23:13, s.v. katav haMishnah Berurah) agrees with the halachah, but says the reason for this is more fundamental.

The halachah requires (Shulchan Aruch, OC 163:2) one who eats to wash both hands even if he does not touch the food. Thus, one feeding a sick person need not wash his hands,5 but the individual who is eating is obligated to wash whether he uses one hand, two hands or no hands at all if he is being fed.

In situations where water is not readily available,6 what is one to do? The Rabbi Dr. Ari Z. Zivotofsky is a professor of brain science at Bar-Ilan University in Israel.

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Shulchan Aruch (OC 158:8), based on a discussion in Eruvin (17a) about those in a military camp, states that one who is in a desert or a dangerous place and has no water is exempt from washing his hands. The Aruch Hashulchan (OC 158:14) understands this to mean that such a person is entirely exempt from this obligation. The Mishnah Berurah (158:36) disagrees and says that such a person falls under the category of one who can obtain water only with effort and he therefore must cover his hands before eating.

The Gemara (Chullin 107b) discusses the permissibility of wrapping one’s hands (see Rashi) and then eating bread without washing. The Rambam (Hilchot Sha’ar Avot Hatumah 8:9; Hilchot Berachot 6:18) understands the gemara’s discussion to relate to those who took it upon themselves to maintain an elevated level of ritual purity even when eating non-holy food.

[Different levels of purity are required for eating food with different levels of holiness. Examples of holy food include korbanot, terumah, ma’aser sheni, et cetera. Even in the centuries following the destruction of the Second Temple, there were those individuals who, in order to accustom themselves to remain at a high level of ritual purity, took it upon themselves to eat even non-holy food while maintaining a high level of ritual purity.]

However, for individuals who do not maintain this stringency, Rambam suggests that covering one’s hands is a legitimate alternative to washing one’s hands.7 Most other authorities disagree with the Rambam and understand that covering one’s hands is not a valid option prior to eating bread unless there are extenuating circumstances.

The Tur (OC 163) states unequivocally: “It is forbidden to eat without washing, even if one wants to wrap his hands in a cloth or eat with a spoon and not touch the bread.”8 More recently Rabbi Chaim Kanievsky wrote (Shoneh Halachot 163:1): “One who has access to water is forbidden to eat bread using a napkin.”

Only in a situation where water is not readily available, such as a traveler who will not find water for a distance of 4 mil (a mil is approximately between 84

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0.6 and 0.9 miles) ahead (Chullin 122b) or 1 mil back,9 and is very hungry, may avail himself of the leniency to cover his hands (Shulchan Aruch, OC 163:1). Both hands must be wrapped until the point where one would wash (Sha’ar haTziyun 163:7) or gloves may be put on and bread may then be eaten. The Rema (OC 163:1) seems to offer a leniency by permitting the use of a spoon, a novel suggestion (Biur Halachah 163, s.v. yadav) that is rejected by many Acharonim including the Gra (Sha’ar haTziyun 163:4).

The Mishnah Berurah (163:7) says it is preferable not to use silverware, but rather to wrap one’s hands with a napkin. Rabbi Eliezer Yehudah Waldenberg (Tzitz Eliezer 8:7:6; cf.

Avnei Yishpeh 2:11) compares wrapping the bread (instead of one’s hands) to using silverware and thus, when faced with no other option, he allows one to wrap the bread, relying on the Rema who permits the use of a spoon in lieu of washing. The Aruch Hashulchan (OC 163:2) equates one who is traveling with a group and fears to stay alone, or one with a wound on his hand that makes it difficult to properly wash, to a traveler who does not have water readily available; in such cases, he may thus rely on the Rambam and wrap his hands.

How to apply the rule regarding a traveler to one who is not traveling yet has difficulty obtaining water is a matter of debate. The Magen Avraham (163:1), Aruch Hashulchan (OC 163:2) and Shulchan Aruch Harav (163:1) say that such an individual must nonetheless also travel four mil to find water. On the other hand, the Mishnah Berurah (163:3) posits that all of the major Acharonim (see e.g., Chayei Adam 40:11) maintain that such an individual need only travel one mil.

The Peri Megadim (Eishel Avraham 163:1; cf. Chayei Adam 37:1) suggests that wrapping one’s hands is preferable to washing with water that is deemed unfit for netilat yadayim. Wrapping is also preferred when the washing can only take place in a non-ideal manner (and no berachah is recited), such as with a questionable utensil (MB 159:21, quoting Chayei Adam 37:1).

A modern situation that could raise these halachot is flying. An airplane bathroom may be akin to the “beit hakisei” of the Talmud and thus engender halachic questions regarding washing.10 An airplane bathroom may be regarded as a situation where water is lacking, for which the solution may be wrapping one’s hands. Thus, on an airplane, where washing in the bathroom is less than ideal, it may be appropriate to wrap one’s hands before eating bread, or to do so in conjunction with washing in a less-than-ideal manner. (Consult your posek before flying.)

Another, less preferred solution (see Tzitz Eliezer 8:7:7) can be used if one knows that he will be in a situation without water. One can have in mind when he washes his hands in the morning that he will be careful that his hands not touch any covered parts of the body during the day, and then the morning washing could serve to cover the washing before eating bread (Shulchan Aruch, OC 164:1). However, because it is difficult to guarantee that one’s hands will remain “pure,” the Aruch Hashulchan (OC 164:3) observes that people do not rely on this leniency.

In a questionable situation this leniency can be relied upon along with covering one’s hands.

Some are more lenient with regard to handwashing. The Magen Avraham (163:1) says that one may wrap his hands even if one is only uncertain if water will be available. Rabbi Moshe Sternbuch says (Teshuvot V’hanhagot 1:167) that one need not go “knocking on doors” to find water, and Rabbi Chaim Yisrael Pesach Feinhandler (Avnei Yishpeh 2:11) says one need not spend money to find water, but may rely instead on the wrapping solution; however, many other posekim frown upon using this leniency unless it is absolutely necessary. Commenting on the statement of the Shulchan Aruch that if there is no water within four mil one may wrap his hands with a napkin, the Gra (OC 163:1 s.v. yi’toal) says simply: “but otherwise it is prohibited to [eat without washing] using a napkin.” The Mishnah Berurah (163:3) says that many Acharonim permit wrapping one’s hands even

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if an individual is merely unsure if he will find water, but notes (Biur Halachah 163, s.v. im) that the Chayei Adam (40:11) approves of this only if one is truly famished; further, the Ritva says that even if one is certain that he will not find water, one should not be lenient unless he is weak from traveling. The Biur Halachah repeats this in the next section (s.v. b’rachok) where he again says it applies only if one is very hungry. The Ateret Zekeinim (on Shulchan Aruch, OC 163, s.v. im) citing the Maharshal, says that even in cases where it is permitted, one who is stringent should be blessed.

These rules apply equally to men and women. It seems that in certain times and places, women specifically were lax regarding this obligation and thus the Ben Ish Chai (year 1, Shmini:2) says to adjure the men to instruct the women and children in his household regarding this obligation. Similarly, the Kaf Hachaim (158:74 end) says to inform women about the punishment for those who don’t wash so that they will be exceedingly careful not to eat bread without washing.

The rabbis treat the washing of the hands before eating bread with considerable seriousness and speak harshly of one who is not scrupulous in observing this halachah. The Shulchan Aruch (OC 158:9; cf. Rambam, Berachot 6:19) writes that one who denigrates this obligation is deserving of excommunication (Mishnah, Eduyot 5:6), will come to poverty (Shabbat 62b) and is uprooted from the world11 (Sotah 4b).

The Gemara enjoins one to be generous in the amount of water used for washing and mentions that Rav Chisda washed with abundant water and was blessed with abundant good from Heaven (Shabbat 62b; Shulchan Aruch, OC 158:10).

The Gemara also relates that Rabbi Akiva regarded this halachah so seriously that when he was imprisoned by the Romans for teaching Torah and had a limited water supply, he was willing to forgo drinking in order to wash his hands (Eruvin 21b; see Rambam, Hilchot Berachot 6:19; Yabia Omer 6:YD:13:13). He stated, possibly meant hyperbolically, that he will use 86

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the limited water to wash because it was preferable that he die of thirst rather than violate the rabbinic ordinance of eating without washing. Tiferet Shmuel (Rabbi Aharon Shmuel Koidonover [Maharshak] seventeenth century; to Chullin 8:1 [to Rosh]) quotes the above and says that wise folk never availed themselves of leniencies; only the fools did.

Part of the explanation for Chazal’s focus on handwashing may be based on the significance of the human hand; human hands are unique. We are among the few species with an opposable thumb. And humans are the only animal in which the small and ring fingers can reach across the palm to meet the thumb, what is known as “ulnar opposition.” These features enable us to use our hands for untold tasks, great and small, and have contributed to man’s ability to fulfill God’s mandate of conquering the world.

It also means that the human hands are always active. Chazal attached great significance to our active hands and created a series of complex laws regarding their ritual purity, so complex as to necessitate an entire tractate called Yadayim. Every time a Jew eats bread and washes his hands, he is reminded of the complex tasks that went into making the uniquely human product of bread and of God’s wondrous creation of the human hand.

Notes 1. This washing is distinct from the other required washings, such as upon arising, after touching shoes, before davening, before duchening, after getting a haircut or leaving the cemetery. Each has different reasons that in turn lead to different halachot. This article is only about washing before eating bread.

2. Torah Temimah, note 199 to Vayikra 11:44 explains that the derivation is from this verse in conjunction with Vayikra 20:7.

3. I.e., twice on the right and then twice on the left, not alternating as is done with other washings such as negel vasser (MB 4:10).

4. Shulchan Aruch Harav 163:1 seems

to agree with the Mishnah Berurah’s reasoning.

5. See Nishmat Avraham, vol. 1, p. 8183 about permission to feed a sick person who will not wash or say berachot.

6. Lack of a utensil would seem to trigger the same rules as lack of water (Tzitz Eliezer 8:7:8).

7. That is how most commentators understand the Rambam.

8. The Bach understood this to apply even if the individual has no water available.

9. Usually understood to be the travel time and effort involved, as opposed to the distance (Biur Halachah 163, s.v. b’rachok; Shu”t Az Nidbaru 6:66). Ben Ish Chai (Year 1, Shemini:18) does not even mention the mil, only the time (one-and-aquarter hours and a quarter hour).

The time to walk a mil is usually estimated as eighteen minutes, and seventy-two minutes for four mil.

The implication is that if the water is in the direction in which he is traveling, and thus does not take him out of his way, he may not eat until he travels up to seventy-two minutes to reach water; if water is not to be found in the direction in which he is traveling, he should go out of his way for up to eighteen minutes to find water. While his position is not clear, Shu”t Sho’el U’meishiv, Kamma 3:103 possibly maintains that it refers to distance, not time.

10. Rabbi Shlomo Zalman Auerbach (Halichot Shlomo, Tefillah 20:24) permits washing in an airplane bathroom. See Ari Z. Zivotofsky, “Your Camp Shall be Holy: Halachah and Modern Plumbing,” Journal of Halachah and Contemporary Society 29 (spring 1995): 89-128.

11. Rashi (Sotah 4b) says it refers to a habitual offender, while Be’er Haitev (OC 158:16) says it refers to even a one-time violator.

INSIDEthe PROGRAMS OF THE ORTHODOX UNION

OU

Yachad Gifts Retail Store Opens in Brooklyn Despite the chilly weather, hundreds of excited Yachad staff and members as well as community members gathered in Brooklyn for the grand opening of Yachad Gifts’ retail storefront this past November. The grand opening, featuring door prizes, raffles and contests, marked the start of a new chapter for Yachad Gifts, a project of Yachad, the Orthodox Union’s flagship program of the National Jewish Council for Disabilities. Yachad Gifts was created to provide job training and meaningful employment to individuals with disabilities while supplying the public with specially crafted gift baskets.

“Jobs are hard to come by for anyone with a disability,” says Yachad International Director Yachad members man the counter at the grand opening of Yachad Gifts’ retail store.

Dr. Jeffrey Lichtman. “The Yachad Gifts store shows Jewish consumers that you can gainfully employ individuals with disabilities—and that it works to everyone's benefit, both employee and employers.”

MORE THAN

8,000 GIFT BASKETS were sold by Yachad Gifts in 2017!

Since its lauch online in 2013, Yachad Gifts has grown rapidly. The new store means an expanded selection of gift baskets and, more importantly, additional vocational opportunities for individuals with disabilities. Yachad members who work at the store are involved in stocking inventory, production, packaging, shipping, data entry, sales and customer service.

“Now we have a physical store, a tangible way for people to see what Yachad can do,” says Stuart Gourdji, Director and Store Manager of Yachad Gifts. The store is located at 1545 Coney Island Avenue in Brooklyn. For store hours, contact 855.505.7500 or info@yachadgifts.com.

Spring 5778/2018 JEWISH ACTION

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HAPPENINGS

AROUND THE OU

Teens Opt for Torah Nearly 400 public school teens from across the US and Canada—as well as quite a few from Chile and Argentina—gathered for a week of Torah study this past December at NCSY’s annual Yarchei Kallah in Stamford, Connecticut.

“This Yarchei Kallah marked the sixth month that I have kept Shabbat, and it was the best one that I have had,” says Daniella Abekassis, a senior at Hewlett High School in New York who attended NCSY's Yarchei Kallah for the first time this year.

“Having so many people by my side to celebrate Shabbat made me feel like I had accomplished something great.”

Photo: Ethan Vann

NCSY's Yarchei Kallah, which was broadcast live for the first time, gives public school teens the opportunity to learn Torah during their winter break instead of going skiing or relaxing on the beach.

College Women Spiritually Recharge During Week of Learning NCSYers weren’t the only ones learning during winter break.

As 2017 came to a close, a dozen young women from college campuses across North America gathered at the Seymour J. Abrams OU Jerusalem World Center (OU Israel Center) for the Third Annual OU-JLIC Women’s Winter Midrasha Program in Israel.

“I learned so much in just five days,” says Devorah Fisher who attends the University of Wisconsin. “This was a great way to spiritually recharge in the middle of the school year.”

The program, created by OU-JLIC Co-Director and Torah Educator at Queens College Rabbi Robby Charnoff, offers a week-long, immersive College women learning intensively at the OU-JLIC Women's Winter Midrasha. learning environment that recaptures the atmosphere students experienced during their year of study in Israel.

Featuring shiurim by Rabbi Charnoff, OU-JLIC Founding Director Rabbi Menachem Schrader and OU-JLIC Torah Educator at IDC Herzliya Margot Botwinick—as well as by guest speakers Rabbanit Shani Taragin, Rabbi Menachem Leibtag and OU Israel Center Program Director Rabbi Sam Shor, among others—the young women explored topics in Tanach, halachah, Gemara and hashkafah.

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Learning in LA With multiple scholars in residence at fourteen OU-member shuls, a rabbinic seminar, a Shabbat oneg and a rebbetzin conference, there was something for everyone at the OU West Coast Torah Weekend held this past December.

But the highlight of the four-day event, in which thousands participated, was the Sunday morning “Learn LA” program, held at OU-member shul Beth Jacob Congregation of Beverly Hills and attended by close to 400 people. This special Torah event featured three concurrent learning sessions on topics such as “Current Halachic Controversies,” “Torah Values During Challenging Times” and “New Insights in Tanach.” Lectures are available at ou.org/learn-la.

Above: Charlie Harary, OU Chairman of Community Engagement, speaking to an overflowing crowd at Beth Jacob Congregation of Beverly Hills during the OU West Coast Torah Weekend.

Right: OU Executive Vice President Allen Fagin attends the Chanukat Habayit for the newly renovated and reopened Young Israel of Century City (YICC) in Los Angeles. The OU West Coast Torah Weekend’s Keynote Dinner was the first event hosted in YICC’s new building. From left: Rabbi Elazar Muskin, Rabbi of YICC; Mr. Fagin; and Dr. Mark Goldenberg, Past President of YICC.

OU-JLIC Most “Swiped” Program at UCLA

By Simcha Himmel As most students know, two of the more challenging things to find on campus are kosher food and Torah classes. Not anymore at UCLA. This past semester, OU-JLIC student president and staff writer for UCLA’s Jewish student magazine Ha’Am Joey Levin, created a simple solution: Jew-Swipes, a feature on Ha’Am’s app that lists daily Jewish events taking place on campus offering free kosher meals.

“Since I've been at UCLA, I have become reliant on obtaining kosher food from Jewish events and wanted an easy way for myself and others to see all the opportunities for kosher food in one centralized place,” says Joey. The name was inspired by UCLA’s meal plan, which refers to each meal as a “swipe.” The first semester after the app was initially launched, OU-JLIC led the way as the organization whose events were most swiped. Jew-Swipes is an optimal platform for OU-JLIC, which provides Shabbat and holiday meals as well as many meals accompanied by shiurim.

“When I tell students about the app, they are very eager to download it and learn what is going on in the Jewish community,” says Joey. “I know of people who check the app each day so they can plan their meals for the day.”

OU-JLIC’s Torah educators work to advance the Torah education and commitment of Orthodox students at twenty-three secular universities across North America, helping students observe key aspects of Jewish life on campus.

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529 Accounts—No Longer Just for College!

In December, OUA’s persistent effort yielded its most recent success: the adoption of a new federal tax provision that expands the use of 529 Education Savings Plans to pay for K-12 education expenses, including those at Jewish day schools and yeshivot. Previously, 529 accounts were limited to paying for college tuition expenses. OUA identified the landmark Tax Cuts and Jobs Act, passed by Congress in late 2016, as an opportunity to deliver support for Jewish education—and the expansion of 529 accounts to K-12 education was among the provisions OUA sought.

The greatest financial benefit derived from 529 Savings Accounts comes from depositing funds as early as possible and allowing them to accrue tax-free gains over a period of years. Depositing funds in the early years of a child’s life can lead to substantial funds by the time that child reaches middle or high school age. Many parents may also be able to benefit (on a shorter term basis) from a state tax income deduction for 529 account deposits. In New York State, for example, parents and grandparents can each receive up to a $10,000 state income tax deduction for deposits into 529 accounts. More information on 529 Savings Accounts for K-12 tuition expenses is available at advocacy.ou.org.

To determine whether a 529 Savings Plan is right for you and your family, contact your personal accountant or financial adviser.

FROM THE MAILBAG Following Hurricane Maria, the OU partnered with New York Governor Andrew Cuomo’s Empire State Relief and Recovery Effort to help storm-ravaged Puerto Rico.

“Right now, Puerto Rico needs our help more than ever and I am so grateful that Governor Cuomo has once again stepped up to the plate to deliver,” said OU Executive Vice President Allen Fagin. “This funding will be key to helping Puerto Rico fix its damaged and failing infrastructure, helping to secure clean water on the island for residents.”

In a letter this past November, Governor Cuomo thanked Mr. Fagin for the OU’s contributions to New York’s relief efforts.

Dear Allen: I wanted to thank you for your assistance with our recent visit to Puerto Rico—Orthodox Union’s water filtration contribution was essential.

I was proud to show, once again, that New York remains united with Puerto Rico, and we are continuing our efforts to rebuild their communities after the devastation of Hurricane Maria. Through the Empire State Clean Water Fund’s $1 million investment, we are helping to remedy the clean water crisis—an essential step toward restoring a livable environment for those in need.

We couldn’t have done it without your assistance, and I thank you for standing with me to help our Puerto Rican brothers and sisters in their time Before boarding a plane to embark on a relief mission to Puerto Rico, of need.

With warmest regards and best wishes, Sincerely, ANDREW M. CUOMO

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New York Governor Andrew Cuomo was joined by OU Executive Vice President Allen Fagin and other strategic partners. Mr. Fagin stands on the far right.

Eighty young women from seven New York Orthodox high schools explored tefillah challenges and developed heightened tefillah self-awareness at the Tefillah Yom Iyun, hosted by New York NCSY in partnership with the Women's Initiative this past February. Photo: Josh Weinberg

WOMEN IN ACTION WI Launches Bold New Challenge Grant In an exciting new project, the Women’s Initiative recently launched “The Challenge Grant,” which challenges synagogues and communities to develop innovative programs that engage women and girls in synagogue and communal life. WI will award grants of $5,000 each to the ten best proposals. Winning programs will serve as prototypes for other communities.

The application deadline is April 30, 2018. Grant awardees will be announced on May 31, 2018. For more information or to obtain an application, contact women@ou.org.

All Women, All the Time Tune into two new exciting podcasts by the Women’s Initiative. Torata, drawing upon psychological constructs and textual analysis, will explore prayer from a woman’s perspective. In the Spotlight will feature ongoing interviews with impactful Orthodox women—from successful entrepreneurs to talented educators to women with personal stories of challenge and inspiration. Showcasing female talent and leadership, In the Spotlight will introduce you to some of the most compelling Orthodox Jewish women who, in both their personal and professional lives, serve as remarkable role models for our community. Podcasts can be accessed at ou.org/women.

The Impact Institute, WI’s New Leadership Training Program Honing negotiation skills, creating and leading effective teams, developing motivation strategies and effective communication skills are all part of the curriculum of the Women’s Institute’s new leadership training institute. The Impact Institute will support communal professionals in maximizing their leadership capacity and will be an invaluable resource for women who wish to enhance their impact in lay leadership roles. Stay tuned for more information.

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NEW POSITIONS & PROMOTIONS The OU welcomes Rebecca Kurz as Volunteer Resources Coordinator. Running a new initiative at the OU, Rebecca will be matching individuals seeking to give back to the community with volunteer opportunities at the OU. “When looking for volunteer opportunities, many people think of local organizations, such as schools and shuls,” says Rebecca. “The OU, as an umbrella organization, does so much for the broader Jewish community nationally as well as locally. This initiative is a way for people to use their skills and talents doing what they enjoy with the reward of seeing the fruits of those labors in the Jewish community.” Rebecca, who has experience in community leadership, previously served as Director of Operations for Camp Nesher. She lives in Teaneck, New Jersey with her husband and four children. If you want to volunteer your skills to make a difference, contact Rebecca at kurzr@ou.org.

Rabbi Adir Posy, who led the OU’s relief efforts in Houston in the aftermath of

Hurricane Harvey, has been promoted to Director of the OU’s Department of Community and Synagogue Services. Rabbi Posy has served in the Community and Synagogue Services Department for seven years, first as the Assistant Director of the OU West Coast Office, and then as the Western States Regional Director. Rabbi Posy, who lives in Los Angeles, also serves as the Associate Rabbi at Beth Jacob Congregation and is a father of six.

Maury Litwack, Executive Director of the OU’s Teach Advocacy Network, has been

appointed to the Education Transition Team of New Jersey Governor Phil Murphy. This is the first time a yeshivah-community advocate is in this advisory position. “Phil Murphy’s commitment to all New Jersey school children is reflected in the education transition team’s diverse and qualified group. I look forward to helping him craft a government that meets the needs of all children and families, including the needs of yeshivah and day school children,” says Litwack.

Formerly Data Services Specialist at the OU, Suzanne Mazel has been promoted to Customer Relationship Management (CRM) Specialist. In this capacity, she will oversee the creation of a new CRM system, manage payment pages and web sites, and process donations. Suzanne has been part of the OU family for more than a decade, first as an NCSYer in the Atlantic Seaboard Region (where she met her husband), and then as a professional, working in the Data Services Department for the past four years.

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Celebrating Twenty-Five Years with NCSY Jewish Action recently spoke with three NCSY leaders who reached an extraordinary milestone this past year: twenty-five years with NCSY. Rabbi Glenn Black, CEO of NCSY Canada and Torah High; Rabbi Tzali Freedman, Director of NCSY Central East; and Rabbi Israel Lashak, Senior Educator for NCSY International, reflect on their years working to ensure Jewish kids remain Jewish.

How did you get involved with NCSY? Rabbi Black: In 1989 while I was a student at Yeshiva University, Rabbi Nosson Westreich, the previous Director of NCSY Canada, asked me to get involved with the region. I did.

When Rabbi Westreich left NCSY, I was approached about taking his position.

The advice I was given was to devote three years to the klal, and then go into the field of my choice—but give the Jewish people some of my heart and soul. Well, three years became five, five became ten, and now, twenty five years later, here I am.

What have you learned in twenty-five years of outreach work?

RB: One: You don’t need more than Torah itself. Expose it to Jews who have little Torah, and they will be moved.

Two: Generosity of spirit. In kiruv your agenda has to be to bring people closer via ahavat Yisrael. Three: If you give children opportunities to grow and learn, they will inspire you. I’ve committed to NCSY and made this my life’s mission because I am constantly inspired as I watch decade after decade of young people find a love and passion for their Judaism and take responsibility to share it with others.

How has NCSY changed over the years?

RB: About seven years ago we started to engage families inclusively—moms, dads, grandparents and younger kids—in our programming; Shabbatonim, Chanukah parties and holidays like Purim and Pesach are all family experiences. We now have parents as fully engaged in the Jewish experience as their children. This is by far our most innovative approach to the way we do kiruv.

How did you first join NCSY? Rabbi Freedman: I was introduced as a candidate for Regional Director by Gary Torgow, a former Regional Director and the Chairman of the Regional Youth Commission (he's currently a Senior Vice President, OU Board of Directors).

My number-one qualification was that

I was willing to take the job! In 1992, outside of those already involved, NCSY was not on the radar screen of those seeking a career in kiruv.

How has NCSY changed over the years?

RF: In some ways nothing has changed, while in other ways it is night and day. The professionalization of the organization, the menu of summer programs and the talent available to hire would have been unfathomable years ago. On the other hand, the level of Jewish apathy within families is creating an unprecedented challenge.

And with the busy, connected lives that today’s teens lead, it is even more difficult to get their loyalty and consistent participation.

How did you first join NCSY? Rabbi Lashak: In the 1980s, I came to Ner Israel Rabbinical College in Baltimore from Mexico and could barely speak a word of English. With the yeshivah’s permission, since I needed an income, I would assist in the kitchen during Shabbatons held by the Atlantic Seaboard Region. Kids would always come to the kitchen to hang out. The Regional Director at the time, Bonnie Pollack, suggested that I become a volunteer adviser, but I needed to support myself. Three years later, Bonnie took me on as a paid adviser.

What’s your favorite NCSY memory?

RL: Some time ago, I was in a sefarim store in Me'ah She'arim, and my daughters wanted me to buy them a 3-D model of the Kotel. It was expensive, so I said no. A few minutes later, a young man with long peyot came into the store, looked at me, and began hugging me.

Turned out, this young man was an NCSYer who had been a difficult teen, but was studying to become an av beit din in Yerushalayim! He wanted to buy $400 worth of sefarim. I paid for them. My daughters were upset— you spend $400 on someone else’s sefarim, and you won’t buy us what we want? I explained that the sefarim this young man was buying were so advanced I could never learn them—but I wanted a share in his Torah learning. My daughters understood. “So why didn’t you spend more?” they asked.

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NEW FROM OU PRESS

a morality grounded in God’s clear expression of how we should behave. . . .

In the Mishnah, the concept of tikkun olam refers less to ethical or moral considerations, and more to a requirement to adopt a macro, and not micro, perspective on certain issues. For example, freeing a person who has been kidnapped is an extremely important mitzvah. Nonetheless, the Mishnah insists that one should not overpay

By Senator Joe Lieberman to free a hostage because with Rabbi Ari Kahn OU Press and Maggid Books overpaying to free a hostage would encourage crime. . . . In adopting laws, we must try to understand their n his new book, written together direct and indirect consequences. with Rabbi Ari Kahn, Senator Joe For three thousand years, the Lieberman discusses the holiday commitment of the Jewish people to the of Shavuot and its important link to values of liberty and justice, the values Passover. Unfortunately, for many that form the core of Jewish law, has Jews, the Passover Seder is not only unified and energized us as a people.

The the most important Jewish night of essays in this book explore these values the year, it is the only Jewish night as the key to continued Jewish unity in of the year. But the Jewish calendar the twenty-first century and beyond, and links Passover with the festival that encourage readers—no matter what their follows it seven weeks later, Shavuot. affiliation or background—to connect This book aims to explore and explain the liberty achieved on Passover with the this connection, and to consider how laws and values revealed on Shavuot. the events of the first Passover eve,

tide. Rabbi Joseph Karasick was in the forefront of this group, and his memoir brings this crucial period in American Jewish history to life.

A natural leader, eloquent speaker, erudite rabbinic scholar and successful businessman, Rabbi Karasick played a unique and outstanding role in the development of American Orthodoxy in the second half of the twentieth century. Active in a host of Jewish organizations and institutions, he quickly rose to the presidency of the OU. Rabbi Karasick includes, as an integral part of the story, unique descriptions of interactions with such prominent personalities as Rabbi Joseph B. Soloveitchik; the Lubavitcher Rebbe; then Israeli chief rabbi, Rabbi Israel Meir Lau; Elie Wiesel; Nahum Goldmann; Baron Alain de Rothschild and many others.

This memoir is more than a description of Rabbi Karasick’s trajectory of leadership and communal involvement in the Jewish organizational world. Woven into the narrative are the strands of a complete and well-rounded life. The saga of Rabbi Karasick’s illustrious family history and the challenges and rewards of his formative years; the adventures of his wife Pepa’s family’s incredible survival of the Holocaust; his romance with Pepa, which lasted a lifetime, as they nurtured and supported each other’s efforts; the success story of the business started by his refugee father-in-law and taken over by Rabbi

By Rabbi Joseph Karasick Karasick, which flourished OU Press by dint of hard work and determination; the raising of an Orthodox family in twentiethcentury New York; anecdotes of travel n mid-twentieth century America, and vacations—all come together with the future of Orthodoxy was far the record of his communal dedication from assured. The Orthodox to describe a wholeness of existence community suffered from a lack of truly greater than the sum of its parts. organization, leadership and vision.

This book is the chronicle of a Predictions of Orthodoxy’s demise remarkable individual and is an were phrased in terms of “when,” not exceptional window on a formative era “if.” Confronted with these challenges, in Jewish history, when Orthodoxy in the Orthodox Union and a group of America, on both a communal and a dedicated and talented individuals personal level, was coming of age. who shared its mission helped turn the

With Liberty and Justice: The FiftyDay Journey from Egypt to Sinai

I

when the Jews became a free people, reached their culmination at Mount Sinai, where we received our moral and legal “Constitution.” Fifty short essays take the reader through each day of the Omer, thus linking Passover to Shavuot and providing a path for those who attend a Seder to continue on and make the spiritual journey to Shavuot.

Each essay engages briefly with some of the fundamental concepts of Jewish law, peppered with personal anecdotes from Senator Lieberman’s life. To give one example, in an essay about the concept of tikkun olam, the authors highlight how the original meaning of the term diverges from the way many use it today: In the Aleinu prayer, source of the words “tikkun olam,” this phrase is followed by the words “b’malchut Shakkai,” or “under the kingship [or sovereignty] of God.” In other words, tikkun olam is not a rootless, free-floating morality. On the contrary, it evinces 94

JEWISH ACTION Spring 5778/2018

Thirteen Steps— Orthodox Judaism in America Comes of Age: My Life and Times

I

Inside

PHILANTHROPY Portrait of Philanthropy

Josef Loeffler: CREATING THE WORLD WE WANT TO SEE Photo: Bryan Engel Photos

T

he desire to make a “serious financial investment” in a Jewish organization with the ability “to help create the kind of world we want to see” led businessman Joe Loeffler to the OU’s new Impact Accelerator. Joe made a significant gift to the Accelerator, a professional development program for social entrepreneurs, and will serve as a mentor for the program for 2018-2019.

The Impact Accelerator will pair the founders of non-profit organizations designed to address pressing communal challenges with business mentors for an eighteen-month program of professional development.

The opportunity came as something of a surprise to Joe, whose business ventures include partnerships in cryptocurrency and real estate. “I admit I thought of the OU as the kosher food people,” he says.

When friend and mentor Rabbi Ben Gonsher (Chief Relationship Officer of Southern NCSY) introduced him to the OU’s many programs, including OU Innovation, Joe was eager to develop a relationship. “I could see that the OU has the infrastructure and sophistication to make this new venture work.”

Joe is active in the Kansas City, Missouri/Overland Park, Kansas Jewish community where he grew up.

He has served as Chair of the Alumni Board of Hyman

Brand Hebrew Academy, the Jewish day school he attended, and as Vice President of the membership committee of his synagogue, Congregation Beth Israel Abraham and Voliner. He is also a generous supporter of the JCC of Greater Kansas City.

I could see that the OU has the infrastructure and sophistication to make this new venture work.

“The Impact Accelerator is a way to build an opportunity together in our community,” says Joe. “Nobody sits alone. It takes a team. If you have a vision for how to solve a problem and the tenacity and courage to bring that vision to life, there’s always a way to make it happen.”

We invite you to join us and make a difference.

Contact Arnold Gerson at agerson@ou.org or visit ou.org/giving.

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Inside

PHILANTHROPY

Honorees Sharona and Jeffrey Weinberg (center) with Gala Co-Chairs Lauri (left) and Lewis (right) Barbanel.

Photos: Ulrich Studios

Congratulations to the Ben Zakkai Honor Society Inductees:

Freda Greenbaum of Florida, Dr. Allan Jacob of Florida, Rabbi Ethan Katz of New Jersey and Yaakov Borenstein of New York.

In addition, Dvorah and Ben Gasner, who reside in Israel, were inducted at the OU Israel Center on February 18, 2018.

Six new inductees joined the ranks of the Ben Zakkai Honor Society at the Society’s Twenty-Third Annual Scholarship Reception, which preceded the NCSY gala. Ben Zakkai raises funds for scholarships for NCSYers to continue their Jewish education after high school and to participate in NCSY programs.

"NCSY, the Ben Zakkai scholarship and the support of so many rabbis and teachers made it possible for me to realize my dreams, to learn what it means to be a Jew and how to give back to our community," says Abbie Solomon, scholarship recipient and NCSY advisor from Plano, Texas. While in high school, she led the effort to reinvigorate NCSY Southwest. She’s currently studying psychology at Lander College for Women in New York City.

Ben Zakkai Honor Society inductee Freda Greenbaum addresses attendees at the society’s reception.

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JEWISH ACTION Spring 5778/2018

Inside PHILANTHROPY

Gala Co-Chairs Seme (left) and Bernice Joszef (right) present a menorah to honorees Rabbi Moshe and Serena Benovitz (center). Rabbi Benovitz, Managing Director of NCSY and longtime Director of the NCSY Summer Kollel, has taught hundreds of NCSYers.

“

NCSY is about making Torah and Judaism relevant.”

-Rabbi Moshe Benovitz, Managing Director of NCSY, Director of the NCSY Summer Kollel, and event Honoree.

NCSY GALA: 63 YEARS OF INSPIRATION

I

Honorees Esti and Benyamin Kaminetzky (third and fourth from right) enjoying the NCSY Gala with their family.

n 1954, NCSY’s founders had a clear vision for the future of our community: inspire Jewish teens with a passion for Yiddishkeit and a desire to strengthen their Jewish identity.

The First Annual NCSY Gala, held this past November, was a tremendous celebration of how this vision has become a reality for Jewish teens across NCSY’s fifteen regions in North and South America. Among the most memorable moments of the night was a moving video of young people, once isolated from Jewish tradition, who connected to Judaism through NCSY. More than 430 guests attended the event, which along with the 23rd Annual Ben Zakkai Honor Society Scholarship Reception, raised $738,000.

For more photos of the NCSY Gala, visit ou.org/philanthropy.

NCSY and the Ben Zakkai scholarship made it possible for me to realize my dreams, to learn what it means to be a Jew and how to give back to our community.

We invite you to join us and make a difference.

Contact Arnold Gerson at agerson@ou.org or visit ou.org/giving.

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CLIMBING TO NEW HEIGHTS WITH A BAT MITZVAH AT MASADA

Devon receives her Bat Mitzvah certificate on Masada.

It’s a long trek up the steep 1,300 feet to the summit of Masada, but it’s the journey of a lifetime for OU Israel Free Spirit: Birthright Israel travelers. Many participants celebrate a Bar/Bat Mitzvah at Masada, a ritual that includes sharing a personal story about the meaning of the experience and choosing a Hebrew name. For trip participants who grew up without a close connection to Judaism and were not given the opportunity to have a Bar/Bat Mitzvah, the experience at Masada leads to deeper engagement with Judaism and Israel.

With support from donors like you

we fulfill the dreams of our Israel Free Spirit participants by giving them an inspiring Bar/Bat Mitzvah experience.

“For me, this was a turning point of the trip,” says Devon Aston of Los Angeles, California, who went on an Israel Free Spirit: Birthright Israel trip this past January. “I’d never experienced the feeling of being a bat mitzvah. It definitely made me feel proud to be Jewish.”

For more information about Israel Free Spirit: Birthright Israel or to apply for their summer trips, visit www.israelfreespirit.com.

More than 600 students raised more than $20,000 for Yachad programs and services.

THE COLOR OF FUN

L

ast year, more than 600 students at the Joseph Kushner Hebrew Academy in Livingston, New Jersey, the Moriah School in Englewood, New Jersey, and the Adolph Schreiber Hebrew Academy of Rockland (ASHAR) in New York raised almost $22,000 dollars for Yachad programs and services by hosting Yachad Color Runs. The Color Run experience begins with learning about living with disabilities and the importance of inclusion in our community for people of all abilities and concludes with the outdoor event. During the untimed run, participants are doused with colorful (safe, washable) powder as they complete the course. For more information about Yachad Color Runs, contact Henna Meltzer at meltzerh@ou.org.

We invite you to join us and make a difference.

Contact Arnold Gerson at agerson@ou.org or visit ou.org/giving.

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JEWISH ACTION Spring 5778/2018

Inside PHILANTHROPY

From left: Yachad International Director Dr. Jeffrey Lichtman, Guests of Honor Rabbi Ari and Deena Katz and Director of New Jersey Yachad Chani Herrmann.

CELEBRATING INCLUSION WITH NEW JERSEY YACHAD The New Jersey Yachad Gala this past December raised $150,000 for Yachad’s programs in the region, including family support services, vocational services, Shabbatonim and programming at the Mendel Balk Yachad Adult Community Center.

For more photos and information about this event, visit ou.org/philanthropy.

From left: Debbie Tsadok, Vocational Services Director Marcel Cohen, Avi and his father Shlomo, Chani Herrmann.

Scott and Shira Sheps, Young Leadership Award recipients, with their children Dovid Betzalel and Ayelet Emuna.

Photos: Abbie Sophia Photography Spring 5778/2018 JEWISH ACTION

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Ambassador PHILANTHROPY Inside

$250,000 & OVER

THE AVI CHAI FOUNDATION ARIELA BALK IN HONOR OF THE MENDEL BALK YACHAD ADULT COMMUNITY CENTER DR. SHMUEL AND EVELYN KATZ STEPHEN AND NATALY NEUWIRTH IN MEMORY OF ANNE SAMSON A"H

Guardian

$100,000-$249,999

Thank you for your generous annual support of our vital programs, including: YACHAD - Inclusion for people with disabilities OU-JLIC - Supporting Jewish life on college campuses NCSY - Life-changing teen empowerment and inspiration program OU ISRAEL - Outreach to at-risk youth, support for soldiers and olim THE PEPA & RABBI JOSEPH KARASICK DEPARTMENT OF SYNAGOGUE & COMMUNITY SERVICESS - Educational content, programs, consulting for synagogues and communities IFS BIRTHRIGHT ISRAEL - Connecting Jewish youth with their heritage BRING ISRAEL HOME - Connecting the Birthright inspiration to everyday life for thousands of trip alumni OU ADVOCACY CENTER - Promoting Jewish interests in the halls of government TEACH ADVOCACY NETWORK- Fighting for Jewish schools to receive fair government funding OU TORAH - Providing a broad array of online Torah study opportunities OU PRESS - Publishing insightful and compelling works on Jewish texts

TORAH

remain anonymous. We invite you to join them in making a di erence

OU.ORG/BENEFACTOR To learn more about the OU Benefactor Circle or to become a member, please call Arnold Gerson, Chief Institutional Advancement O at 212.613-8313 or email agerson@ ou.org.

er,

MR. AND MRS. LIOR ARUSSY MARK (MOISHE) & JOANNE BANE MR. AND MRS. NEIL COHEN ALAN & BARBARA GINDI BECKY & AVI KATZ MORDECAI & MONIQUE KATZ KARMELA & JERRY KLASNER THE JEWISH FEDERATION OF GREATER LOS ANGELES THE JEWISH FEDERATION OF METROPOLITAN CHICAGO ERIC AND GALE ROTHNER RUDERMAN FAMILY FOUNDATION MORIS & LILLIAN TABACINIC UJA-FEDERATION OF NEW YORK JOYCE AND JEREMY WERTHEIMER

Founder

$50,000 - $99,999 MR. RAANAN AND DR. NICOLE AGUS ALLEN AND DEANNA ALEVY DANIEL & RAZIE BENEDICT FALIC FAMILY FOUNDATION MR. AND MRS. JACK FEINTUCH RABBI MANFRED AND LISELOTTE Z"L GANS CHESSED FUND MS. LORRAINE HOFFMANN A"H KITTY & ANWAR HOORY Z"L ETTA BRANDMAN KLARISTENFELD & HARRY KLARISTENFELD IN MEMORY OF JUDY LEFKOVITS LEGACY HERITAGE FUND MR. DAVID LICHTENSTEIN MAYBERG FAMILY FOUNDATION THE RABBI NATHANIAL AND SHIRLEY POLLACK MEMORIAL FOUNDATION LILLIAN ZEIDES Z"L

Winterfor 5778/2017 JEWISH ACTION 100acknowledged We apologize any omissions.

If you wish to be

Builder

$25,000 - $49,999 DANIEL AND LIORA ADLER SABY & ROSI BEHAR HARRY H. BEREN Z"L MAX & ELANA BERLIN BRIAN & DAFNA BERMAN JUDI AND JASON BERMAN BEVERLY HILLS MARRIOTT JO & JONAH BRUCK CRAIN-MALING FOUNDATION: WWW.CRAINMALING.ORG GERSHON & AVIVA DISTENFELD DRS. ROBERT AND KAY FAGUET GREATER MIAMI JEWISH FEDERATION DR. EPHRAIM AND RITA GREENFIELD DR. ELLIOT & LILLIAN HAHN MR. & MRS. ROBERT HARTMAN LANCE & RIVKIE HIRT ALISSA AND SHIMMIE HORN JEWISH FEDERATION OF S. PALM BEACH COUNTY KIM & JONATHAN KUSHNER MICHAEL AND ANDREA LEVEN FAMILY FOUNDATION MRS. FEGI MAUER MERIDIAN CAPITAL EITAN AND DEBRA MILGRAM MR. AND MRS. MARTIN NACHIMSON RAPHAEL & RIVKA NISSEL HENRY AND MINDY ORLINSKY RALPHS FOOD4LESS FDN ROBBIE AND HELENE ROTHENBERG SAMIS FOUNDATION BARRY & JOY SKLAR THE WEIL FAMILY THE WEININGER FOUNDATION INC. JESSICA & LENNY WEISS THE WEISS FAMILY, CLEVELAND, OHIO ESTHER AND JERRY WILLIAMS MR. JERRY & MRS. SARA WOLASKY MASA YEHUDI JOSH AND ALLISON ZEGEN

Visionary

$18,000 - $24,999

LEWIS & LAURI BARBANEL DENNIS AND DEBRA BERMAN VIVIAN & DANIEL CHILL PETER & LORI DEUTSCH LINDA AND MICHAEL ELMAN JOSEPH & BELLA ESSAS JUDITH & ALLEN I. FAGIN HOWARD TZVI AND CHAYA FRIEDMAN RABBI SIDNEY AND LISA GLENNER JAMES AND AMY A"H HABER JOAN & PETER HOFFMAN MORRIS & SANDRA KAPLAN MR. AND MRS. JACK NAGEL YEHUDA & ANNE NEUBERGER ISABELLE AND DAVID NOVAK JEFFREY & ADRIA MANDEL MARC PENN ALLEN & MIRIAM PFEIFFER HENRY AND GOLDA REENA ROTHMAN MR. AND MRS. STEPHEN SAMUEL GEORGE AND IRINA SCHAEFFER TOBY MACY SCHAFFER MICHAEL & ARIANNE WEINBERGER DAVID & GILA WEINSTEIN GEORGE & JONI WHITE DRS. YECHIEL & SURI ZAGELBAUM

d, please contact Elaine Grossman at grossmane@ou.org

Partner

Patron Inside

$10,000 - $17,999

$5,000 - $9,999 PHILANTHROPY

JUNE & DAVID ABOKSIS ALISA ABECASSIS ADM/ROI MR. AND MRS. EMANUEL ADLER AARON AND TAMMY ATTIAS YALE & ANN BARON DR. MOSHE AND BRYNDIE BENARROCH MRS. JULIA & MR. BRAD W. BERGER MR. AND MRS. ISAAC BERMAN THE CHARLES CRANE FAMILY FOUNDATION CCS FUNDRAISING COMBINED JEWISH PHILANTHROPIES THE CROWN FAMILY NEAL AND BETH CUTLER MR. SHELDON J. DAVID ROBERT AND MICHELLE DIENER DR. & MRS. SHLOMO DRAPKIN FRED AND SUZAN EHRMAN RINA AND RABBI DOV EMERSON DRS. GILAT AND YOSSI ENGLANOFF MARK AND CHAVA FINKEL MARK & CHERYL FRIEDMAN ARNOLD & ESTHER GERSON MURRAY & BATSHEVA GOLDBERG MR. AND MRS. ERNIE GOLDBERGER RABBI MICAH AND RIVKIE GREENLAND ABE AND RONIT GUTNICKI MR. AND MRS. DAVID HARTMAN ED & ROBYN HOFFMAN/HOFFMAN CATERING MR. NATE HYMAN JEWISH FEDERATION OF ST. LOUIS DR. AND MRS. BERNARD KAMINETSKY RABBI JOSEPH KARASICK ROBIN & BRAD KLATT ALICE & JACOB KLEIN DANA AND JEFFREY KORBMAN JONAH & FRAN KUPIETZKY JOAN AND BILL LOPATIN VIVIAN AND DAVID LUCHINS DR. AND MRS. SAMUEL LUPIN IRIS & SHALOM MAIDENBAUM AZI & RACHEL MANDEL DAVID AND MICHELLE MARGULES STUART AND FRANCES MILLER MRS. ELLA MEISEL MR. AND MRS. SHALOM MENORA MR. & MRS. ASHER DAVID & MICHELLE MILSTEIN GILA AND ADAM MILSTEIN STEPHEN AND EVE MILSTEIN ETAN & VALERIE MIRWIS & FAMILY DR. MICHAEL & LIZ MUSCHEL MR. CAL NATHAN PROSKAUER ROSE LLP RALPHS GROCERY COMPANY MR. LAWRENCE REIN RICHMOND JEWISH FOUNDATION DR. AND MRS. JAY ROBINOW MATTHEW ROSENBLATT MR. AND MRS. MARVIN SAMUELS GENIE AND STEVE SAVITSKY ETHEL & STAN SCHER DR. STEPHEN SCHLOSS MENACHEM AND RENA SCHNAIDMAN MR. AND MRS. LOUIS SCHWARTZ MR. BARUCH SINGER WILLIAM SOLOMON RABBI SHLOMO & MINDY SPETNER DR. AND MRS. ETHAN SPIEGLER TALK N SAVE ISAAC H. TAYLOR ENDOWMENT FUND DR. AND MRS. SHIMMY TENNENBAUM STANLEY & ELLEN WASSERMAN MR. & MRS. ALAN ZEKELMAN

ASHFORD HOSPITALITY MICHAEL & SUSAN BAUM MR. HARVEY BELL MR. AND MRS. JULIUS BERMAN JUDAH & FAIGE BIENSTOCK MR. AND MRS. BRIAN BILZIN MR. AND MRS. TOMER BITTON RABBI GLENN & HENNI BLACK HARVEY & JUDY BLITZ DR. AND MRS. STEPHEN BRENNER PACE & AILEEN COOPER STEVE DORFMAN SARI AND SHLOMO DRAZIN LEA & LEON EISENBERG ROBERT EISENBERG MRS. MARGARET FEDER RABBI DAVE & CHANI FELSENTHAL MR. AND MRS. MARTIN FINEBERG RON & LISA ROSENBAUM FISHER STEPHEN & ROZ FLATOW JOSEPH & RACHEL FOX YONATAN AND MICHAL FRANKEL SURA & BERT FRIED DR. STAN AND MARLA FROHLINGER ANDREW AND YVETTE GARDNER LAWRENCE & JUDITH GARSHOFSKY RABBI BEN & AVIVA GONSHER GOLDIE AND I. DAVID GORDON FREDA GREENBAUM DR. EDWIN & CECILE GROMIS ROBYN & SHUKIE GROSSMAN NORMA HOLZER MICHAEL & ROCHELLE JACOBSEN ETHAN & DEBORAH KATZ DAVID AND ROBERTA KIMMEL DRS. DAVID & MICHELE KLEIN MR. AND MRS. ROBERT KORDA JOSEPH AND HANA KORNWASSER MR. AND MRS. SCOTT KRIEGER MARC & RENA KWESTEL DAVID AND FAYE LANDES JOSHUA & BRYNA LANDES MRS. SHIRLEY LEVY DR. MARIAN STOLTZ-LOIKE AND DR. JOHN LOIKE JENNIFER & DROR MICHAELSON MR. AND MRS. RAUL MOSKOVITZ ANNA BAUM & BARRY NOVACK TERRY & GAIL NOVETSKY AVI AND ALISSA OSSIP PEOPLE'S UNITED INSURANCE AGENCY MOSHE AND YAFFA POPACK MR. AND MRS. DAVID PORUSH WILLIAM & DEBORAH RAND SARA AND LAURENCE RICHARDS GAIL & BINYAMIN RIEDER MALKI AND J. PHILIP ROSEN MR. & MRS. IRA ROSENBERG YECHIEL & NOMI ROTBLAT JOSHUA & ALYSE ROZENBERG MILTON AND SHIRLEY SABIN TAMMI AND BENNETT SCHACHTER JERRY & BARBARA SCHRECK MALI & STEVE SCHWARTZ MRS. MARGIE SHABAT DR. MORRIS AND SHARON SILVER JONATHAN AND TALIA SISCOVICK JAIME & MARILYN SOHACHESKI MR. AND MRS. DAVID SOKOL MR. AND MRS. ABRAHAM J. STERN DR. DAVID AND DOROTHY STOLL AARON AND ARIELLA STRASSMAN TAL TOURS MR. & MRS. GARY TORGOW TRAVEL INSURANCE ISRAEL TOVA AND HOWARD WEISER WILF FAMILY FOUNDATION SUSANNE AND MICHAEL WIMPFHEIMER JORGE AND TAMMARA WOLDENBERG 5778/2017 FRANWinter & DAVID WOOLFJEWISH ACTION 101

BOOKS

The Skeptic and the Rabbi: Falling in Love with Faith

By Judy Gruen She Writes Press, 2017 256 pages

Reviewed by Leah Aharoni

P

icking up Judy Gruen’s new book The Skeptic and the Rabbi: Falling in Love with Faith one Shabbat afternoon, I didn’t plan on reading for long. My whole Shabbat learning schedule was lined up ahead of me. But in the battle between the book and my willpower, the book won. Sometime around Havdalah, I got to the last page, with the forlorn sefarim looking at me from the coffee table.

Reading Judy Gruen’s memoir feels like sitting down for a cup of coffee with a new friend. You trade stories, laugh at common experiences, share insights and think, where did the time go? Against the backdrop of the last few years’ crop in the Jewish bildungsroman genre, Gruen’s book, for once, feels relatable.

The plot starts from the end with the excitement and nervousness of the author’s “Orthodox-style” wedding day, the last step sealing her connection to a Torah lifestyle. From there, she takes us back into the ‘60s and ‘70s, describing Leah Aharoni is the founder of SHEvuk Business Consulting and the co-founder of Women for the Wall, a grassroots women's organization dedicated to preserving the tradition at the Kotel. She lives in Israel with her husband and children.

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her liberal Jewish upbringing, as well as the shaping of her adult identity in the ‘80s, themes common to many other ba’al teshuvah stories.

Yet Gruen’s childhood story is also different, molded by two sets of very different grandparents. The traditional Jewish learning and observance of

with plenty of breathing room, something she hadn’t seen as a child.

Gruen’s meeting with her husbandto-be Jeff was the first step towards finding that kind of Judaism. Jeff had discovered Torah several years prior to meeting Judy, so by the time the two met they had to negotiate both their personal relationship and their relationship with Jewish observance.

Though until then Gruen had practiced what she calls “cultural and emotional Judaism,” three main objections, almost stereotypes, emerge from the descriptions of her early encounters with religious observance: it is suffocating, it is anti-women and it is irrelevant.

The last point was particularly poignant. When Gruen lost her older brother, Judaism as she knew it provided no solace. Years later she found herself wondering how years of Reform after-school education could have possibly left her with no concept of an immortal soul as a Jewish tenet of faith. Similarly, her attempts to question the temple rabbi about God did not provide a satisfying answer

Years later she found herself wondering how years of Reform afterschool education could have possibly left her with no concept of an immortal soul as a Jewish tenet of faith.

Eastern Europe, brought over by her maternal parents, took on a melancholy and stressful streak in the new country, despite the fact that her grandfather was ordained in the Conservative movement. At the same time, her other set of grandparents cultivated a cosmopolitan, borderline anti-establishment mindset. The combination left Gruen yearning for a vibrant and joyful religious experience

beyond a psychological experience.

It took consistent, challenging, and honest, text-based Torah learning to change Gruen’s misconceptions.

Together with her fiancé, she joined Rabbi Daniel Lapin’s classes, where she encountered not only the stories, but the multiple layers of meaning, the linguistic nuance and the philosophical questions as well. The learning led

Yet I walked away with two deep takeaways. The first was to stop being afraid to talk about God. to the realization that there was much more that she didn’t know. The intellectual honesty prompted her to dig deeper.

The same honesty shines throughout the book, as Gruen refuses to sugarcoat her narrative. She frankly discusses the many real challenges she encountered in her decision to take upon various mitzvot. As she explored the laws of taharat hamishpachah, for example, Gruen learned about the spiritual and marital benefits.

Yet she also acknowledged the difficulties of keeping these halachot, especially at the outset.

Similarly, the mixed bag of supportive, yet at times too-close-for-comfort shul life; negotiating a relationship with people at various levels of observance inside the community; and dealing with non-observant and nonJewish friends and relatives is all in here, unadorned.

The memoir is a terrific read for anyone curious about the Torah lifestyle. Yet I walked away with two deep takeaways. The first was to stop being afraid to talk about God. In Jewish discourse and polemic, inside and outside the frum community, we talk about religion, Torah, halachah and community, yet the mention of Hashem as the Creator and the Law-giver is all too often missing from the discussion.

Ironically, even without knowing much about formal Judaism, many Jewish souls feel the presence of God almost instinctively and when they hear an authentic discussion of His presence, something clicks. This comes out clearly in Gruen’s story and has been echoed by the experiences I have heard from other baalei teshuvah.

Secondly, real, undiluted Torah study has the power to attract people and even break through misconceptions.

The path to bringing more Jews closer starts with an unapologetic, yet empathetic, value stance. Though Gruen was privileged to encounter a charismatic and gifted teacher in Rabbi Lapin, it was the light of the Torah itself that shone through his authentic teaching, that enchanted her.

Of course Chazal had taught us that already: Hashem said,“Halevai oti azvu ve’et Torati shamaru, shehameor sheba machziran limutav—I wish they [the Jewish people] would forget about Me and they would safeguard my Torah, for the light in it will bring them back to good.”

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103

LASTING IMPRESSIONS

MY MINYAN ODYSSEY

By Effy Zinkin, as told to Bayla Sheva Brenner

D

ad was my hero, my Rock of Gibraltar. Raised secular by a single mother who was constantly struggling financially, he could have ended up leading a maladjusted life. Instead, Dad beat the odds—and then some.

He went to yeshivah, embraced Yiddishkeit, married a religious woman and became a pillar in our small Orthodox community in Highland Park, New Jersey. A model husband, father and doctor, he somehow knew who he wanted to be and became him.

It was no wonder that my siblings and I worshipped Dad. So from the moment my father informed us he had been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer, I was an emotional wreck. I couldn’t go an hour without breaking down. True to form, my father, during his final excruciatingly painful ten months, was busy comforting us.

It was during shivah that I realized how much I owed my father, and that, unfortunately, it was too late to try to repay him. Then it dawned on me.

Kaddish.

I read that saying Kaddish for the niftar elevates the neshamah. I could still do that for him.

But could I commit to davening with a minyan three times a day for eleven months straight—no matter what? I wasn’t exactly the guy who made it to a minyan every day. I felt more like the fellow sitting on the couch eating potato chips who one day decides to run a marathon.

But this was for my Dad. I had to do this.

And so began my minyan odyssey, a frenzied journey that encompassed three countries, fifteen states and more than 1,000 minyanim.

Just before my father passed away, I started a new job as president of an eyeglasses company based in New Jersey.

104

JEWISH ACTION Spring 5778/2018

The position entailed frequent travel, including overseas. I learned to plan before every business trip, checking and double-checking the times of minyanim in various cities. I organized minyanim on planes and at sporting events.

And I learned to navigate GoDaven. com—which would become my lifeline throughout the year.

On one business trip to Bentonville, Arkansas, the local Chabad rabbi said he could organize a minyan for Shacharit but not for Minchah or Ma’ariv.

Apparently, there weren’t too many Jews in Bentonville. So I arranged for a flight to Chicago, enabling me to catch a Minchah/Ma’ariv in a shul in the Windy City and then fly back that same night to Bentonville.

Taanit Esther was a bit tricky. I had to drive deep into Long Island for a meeting with a company we were considering purchasing. There were few minyanim to be found. I ended up praying in a hospital with doctors and patients participating; the chief of surgery brought a Torah for the leining.

I had no doubts that I was doing the right thing; siyata d’Shmaya always came through in the nick of time.

One time, I had a meeting in Wisconsin with the senior management of a major department store chain. I located a 1:30 Minchah in a day school a halfhour drive from the meeting. I scheduled the meeting for 2:30, allowing for plenty of time to make the drive. But just after I landed, I got a message that the minyan was not going to take place after all. My back-up minyan was an hour and forty-five-minute drive from the meeting; I had no choice but to be an hour late. I sent two junior level employees to cover for me.

When I arrived at the meeting a full hour late, I discovered to my surprise that everyone had been sitting there for an hour—everyone aside from senior

management—who “happened to be” running late. They showed up a few minutes after I got there.

I experienced dozens of stories like that over the year.

On Thanksgiving, I planned to take my son to Giant Stadium in Detroit for a Detroit Lions game. I called a contact in the city to find out about minyanim near the stadium. He told me the local minyan only met on workdays, but he would try to help us out. My son and I were prepared to leave the game if we had to.

We didn’t have to.

It turned out that the individual I called planned on attending the game.

He told me he would walk through the stadium to find ten men, which he did.

With his help, along with that of several Orthodox vendors at the stadium who closed their kosher-food stands during halftime to corral everyone to one stand, I had a minyan.

Walk around any airport and ask for a Minchah—you might get lots of “no’s.” But tell them you need to say Kaddish, and suddenly a swarm of people are more than ready to join in.

It dawned on me that maybe the zechut the neshamah gets has something to do with the achdut that often results when someone has to say Kaddish.

Davening Kaddish for the last time as an avel was an emotional experience.

After eleven straight months, I wasn’t ready to give it up. Three times a day I had the chance to stop and think about my Dad, and connect to God in a way I never had before.

My yirat Shamayim is light years ahead of where it was. I daven with more kavanah. It would be disingenuous for me to say I make it to minyan three times a day every day, but I have become much more consistent. Minyan plays a much bigger role in my life now.

I hope I elevated my father’s precious neshamah. I know I elevated mine.

Bayla Sheva Brenner is an award-winning freelance writer and a regular contributor to Jewish Action.

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