Butterfly Magazine - Issue 13

Kidpreuneu

rs

Lead The Way

Vol. 1 Issue 13 17th JUly 2020

ACTION MAN IN ZAMBIA

Justin Mohammed In collaboration with

Behind the Lens

Hair Sculpture

Laetitia Ky is an artist from the Ivory Coast Women Follow Your Dream 2

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Black Kings Dignified, Disciplined and Determined

Black

Hebrews The Apocrypha

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BREAKING NEWS

Automatic Citizenship for African Descendants in The Gambia

Draft Constitution of The Gambia 4

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e logo with the boy and the man much smaller.

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Lead story: Justin Mohammed

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Bakita: KK

Contents Cover - Justin Mohammed

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30 Zambia

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19

Gordon Case

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All About Rwanda

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Freedom is Mine with Fayida

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Hello Privilege

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Opportunities

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4

BREAKING NEWS

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What’s on the Screen?

Behind the Lens

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The Disruptor

Editor-in-Chief Beverley Cooper-Chambers EDITORIAL TEAM Karen Ferrari Simone Scott-Sawyer Editorial Researcher Tasina J. Lewis Sharrae Newell-Barn MARKETING DIRECTOR Marvin Osemwegie

Father And Son Digging Deep

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THE BUTTERFLY MAAG TEAM

iChurch Rev Goddy Goddy

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Just Ask Ariel

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Laughter, Good For The Soul

40 43 44

Sports Arrow

Last Word

This is our trauma

SOCIAL MEDIA ANALYST Michael Brown

ADVISORY BOARD Financial Strategic Advisor Nastassia Hedge-Whyte, MAAT, ACCA,ICAJ Marketing Strategic Advisor Jeremie Alamazani, Principal at Wealth Partners Ltd. Editorial Contributors David Clarke (London) Rhea Delaney (London) Joshua Grant aka Sports Arrow (London) Natalee Grant (Jamaica) Fayida Jailler (UK) Bakita Kasadha (UK & Uganda) Chi-Chi Osemwegie (London) Donna Williams (USA) Manasses Williams (USA) Design Editor Rusdi Saleh Graphics Butterfly logo by Wayne Powell (Jamaica) Submit a story: communications@butterflymaag.com Advertising enquiries: ads@butterflymaag.com Ad copy should be submitted Friday for the following week’s publication.

Butterfly Magazine published weekly on Fridays.

Butterfly magazine is published weekly by BUTTERFLY MAGAZINE LIMITED, 86-90 Paul Street, London, EC2A 4NE, UK. Tel: (44) (0) 203 984 9419 Butterfly ™ 2015 is the registered trademark of THE LION AND THE LAMB MEDIA HOUSE. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. Reproduction in whole or in part is prohibited without written permission from the publishers BUTTERFLY MAGAZINE LIMITED. Address all correspondence to: communications@butterflymaag.com No copyright infringement is intended

Going Forward

Rwanda

The Land of a Thousand Hills

How Rwanda is Becoming the Singapore of Africa

Hotel Rwanda

Rwanda’s Capital is Attracting Tourists Transform your viewing...

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Credit: Netflix

THE LIBRARY

Hello Privilege -

It’s Me, Chelsea

In this documentary, Chelsea Handler explores how white privilege impacts American culture — and the ways it’s benefited her own life and career.

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Credit: Red Table Talk

The Narcissism

Credit: Netflix

Epidemic

Disclosure Transform your viewing...

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What’s on the Screen?

The Screeners’

TV Choice

Illustration by Wayne Powell (Jamaica)

WELCOME TO THE VIRTUAL LIBRARY

Welcome to our Virtual Library !

Feel free to browse around and choose any book to read, all you have to do is click on the book cover to get the link.

Enjoy!

Credit: Bennie Chibwe

Man

Hazards Zambian Drama TV Series Credit: Extra Mile

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(English Subtitles)

T.tuje comedy Ep 15 Try to not laugh , Rwandan comedy 2020 , Nyaxo comedy style

On the Other Foot Transform your viewing...

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Credit: MUBI

woman

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My Neighbor, My Killer

Pose 12

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small child

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The Best Sports Scenes

Frederick Douglass for Kids Transform your viewing...

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Fun facts about Zambia

Frederick Douglass 14

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Credit: Netflix

OLDER CHILD

Credit: South African Conn

young adult

Credit: HBO

Credit: Netflix

South African Cuisine: Zambia

Credit: Apple

First Match

I May Destroy You

Geeky Gadget Transform your viewing...

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gen z

Credit: Fredi Nwaka

Credit: Fredi Nwaka

Hello Mr Right

On the Other Foot 16

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Are We Dead Yet?

grandPA

ReMastered: Who Shot the Sheriff?

Storyville – The Underdog and the Battle for Kenya

Sunny D - D is for Declarations Transform your viewing...

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grandma

Black Love Doc Credit: Netflix

Amateur 18

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Your Excellency

Gordon

Rememberance

Case

Remembering Gordon “Bwanna” Case “All the world’s a stage, And all the men and women merely players; They have their exits and their entrances; And one man in his time plays many parts” As You Like It — William Shakespeare

A

n actor, a poet, a screenwriter, a part time comedian, an avid traveler, a beloved father, an educated debater; these were but a few of the monikers that fit Gordon’s roles in life. One of Gordon’s proudest achievements was being a part of the Royal Shakespeare Company and performing in Stratford-Upon-Avon.

Gordon believed it was important to support ones community. As one of the founding members of the Black Theater Initiative, he cared about Black actors receiving equal opportunities for TV, film, and theatre roles, and access to grants for productions. He was also passionate about Afro Caribbean children not being overlooked in the British education system.

He was active in his support of organisations like Manhood Academy and Talawa.

Aggro Seizeman

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Freedom is Mine

China

BY FAYIDA JAILLER

T

he largest migrant African population in Asia resides in China. In 2014 there were a reported 500,000 Africans living in China, of which the largest settlement can be found in Guangzhou, the fourth largest city in China. The African enclave in Guangzhou is informally referred to as ‘Chocolate City’ or ‘Little Africa’. In 2014 Guangzhou had 16,000 residents from the African Diaspora, including many men who intermarried with Chinese women and had mixed-race AfroChinese children. The dominant languages are English, French, Arabic, Swahili and Igbo.

Other concentrations of Africans live in Beijing, Shanghai and Yiwu.

China and Africa have been regularly trading since the 7th century, when Arab traders during the Tang dynasty trafficked enslaved Africans to China. The Chinese referred to the Africans as ‘Kunlun’ loosely meaning ‘dark skin’.

At the turn of the 20th century some of the first African Americans began to arrive in China.

Buffalo soldiers were sent to suppress the Boxer uprisings in 1900. Large numbers of African-Americans came to China during the first and second World Wars, largely working as manual labourers.

Six African-American battalions participated in the construction of the Ledo Road, which went from China to India.

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After declaring itself a communist nation in 1949, China invited African students to study in Chinese universities to encourage good relations with African political leaders. Increasing numbers of African students arriving in Beijing and Shanghai over the years which lead to growing racial tension. These eventually spilled over into violent clashes, the biggest of which occurred in 1988 at Hohai University.

During the economic boom of the 1990s, swathes of entrepreneurial Africans migrated to China to exploit lucrative trading opportunities, largely settling in the major port city of Guangzhou, or ‘Chocolate City’ as it is also known. They capitalised on buying cheap consumer goods in China, which they then exported to their home nations in Africa to sell.

Most traders only came for temporary periods of time, though many did settle and start a life in China, often marrying local women.

The largest Diaspora group in Guangzhou is the Nigerian community, then followed by Senegal, Mali, Guinea and Ghana.

Naturally these Diaspora groups cater for their own community in terms of market stalls, shops, restaurants, supermarkets and entertainment venues.

Welcome to the Disruptor

To be a disruptor in business is to create a product, service, or way of doing things which displaces the existing market leaders and eventually replaces them at the helm of the sector. [`the disruptor]

Less Talk More Action

How Effective

Was Black Pound Day?

Kidpreuneurs Lead The Way

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Credit: Blackhistory.com

Alonzo Herndon

from slave to millionaire

I Used My School Fee To Build

The Biggest Charcoal Factory In Ghana

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Apple

Conference

Let’s Have An Airline Or Two

– Africa To Caribbean Transform your viewing...

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lead story

Justin Mohammed ACTION MAN IN

By Simone

Scott-Sawyer

ZAMBIA

of Islam meeting in July 1996. This marked a big change in my mindset towards life and our people.

BM: Who is Justin Muhammad: could you tell us where are you from and what inspired you to start Next Level Developments?

I would say I had a fairly ordinary upbringing in London. My parents are from Grenada in the Caribbean and I grew up with my four siblings. My father emphasised the need to represent Black people and to do well at school. I enjoyed school at first and the homework my father gave me meant I never found the work difficult so I started to excel. As I got into my teens I began to see how many of my black peers were in lower sets and were not connected to academia in the same way, instead they were connected to black culture and each other in a way that I had not experienced. I remember consciously making a decision to immerse myself with my own people. The Deputy Headteacher had noted that I was moving in more colourful circles and one day remarked that as a result, my grades would suffer. They did.

Later I decided to study Law at university and was informed by a well-meaning lecturer that while I was on course for a first-class degree, I was informed this would only be possible provided I did not approach my essays and critique from a black perspective. Making the choice to express my legal thoughts & opinions about those in the black community and to move in similar circles would ultimately result in me being intellectually and culturally separated from my own people. It felt like I needed to sell my soul just to fit in. This was a price I was not willing to pay.

As I approached young adulthood I dove fully into Black culture. I set up a sound system DJ’d on a community radio station attended parties like it was a full-time job, drinking and smoking continuously until I attended my first Nation

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The Nation of Islam allows us to use our gifts, skills and talents in the service and building of our own community. It was after reading a book called “Message to the black man” by the Honourable Elijah Muhammad that the seeds for the economic blueprint for the improvement of black people was planted. On page 174 it reads: 1. Recognise the necessity for unity and group operation (activities).

2. Pool your resources, physically as well as financially.

3. Stop wanton criticisms of everything that is blackowned and black-operated.

I had a young family around this time and was adamant I did not want to inflict the same warped school system I had endured, on my children. As a member of the Nation, we pooled our resources, worked collectively and were able to build schools for our children and design their education as we saw fit. This experience of self-determination for family, community and the people is the genesis of Next Level Developments.

This is a worldwide movement that we are tapping into, to emancipate, empower and self-determine the direction of a people. The NLD model is based on a collective responsibility to right as many wrongs as we can. We cannot wait for the children of our kidnappers to bring us home, we can do it ourselves, by providing the tools needed to make the change. As the president of Rwanda, Paul Kagame once remarked: “we do not need donor money to clean our own backyards”. We can self-determine from the ground up.

able to purchase 100s of acres for a small fraction of the price of the Caribbean land.

For a newcomer to build a regular 3 bed-roomed house with landscaped gardens on half an acre of land, costs approximately ÂŁ45,000. However, as a part of NLD we have larger communal plots with modern concept homes and shared amenities. We therefore can build faster at half the cost as we benefit from pooling your resources mentally, financially and socially.

In 2004, I made my first trip to Africa (Ghana) with my mother. It was a reconnaissance trip, with the intention being to ascertain what it would take to relocate from the UK, how much it would cost to build a home etc. However, it was a struggle to assimilate into the Ghanaian culture.

With hindsight, I can see that to do then what I am doing now, needed a different mindset.

Black people are oppressed everywhere, economically, socially and spiritually even in Africa, but the struggle for those living in the diaspora is so different from those on the continent - it takes a lot for us to really understand each other. The first obstacle was to secure the relevant buy-in from the people and establish a meaningful rapport as this is essential to any repatriation project. In Ghana, I found that there was a more westernised way of thinking in business and less of a cohesive mentality to help each other.

Zambia is a little different - they kept their freedom fighting spirit and independence up until 1993 and this still pervades their culture to a point.

In my experience, it has been easier to bridge gaps in our viewpoints in Zambia. The people are always looking for collaborations and take the development of Zambia and Africa as a whole personally, making it easier to form partnerships.

I also visited the Caribbean islands to look for spaces we could acquire to build a viable community. Grenada had a wonderful spirit and willing partners, however the land mass is mountainous and hilly making potential land development costly. Jamaica was then considered as the potential home of our pilot project and a 12-acre site was chosen at a cost of approximately ÂŁ120,000.

While weighing up this option I was introduced to the idea of Zambia.

It is three times the size of the UK with a quarter of its population, full of fertile and minerally rich land. We were

BM: So how did you get involved with Zambia?

While publicly speaking about the plan to build a community in Jamaica, a member of the audience told me her friend had access to land in Zambia and put me on the phone there and then.

After being introduced to Joyce Katilungu we had a conference call and discussed the possibilities. However nobody could fathom how we would work together as we only had a couple of shareholders at this stage and nowhere near the capital that was required.

One morning in May 2019, I woke up at 5am, with an overwhelming compulsion to be in Zambia that day. I told some of my team and by 4 pm later on that day I was at the airport flying to Zambia! The following morning I was met at the airport by Joyce.

She and her family showed me around and introduced me to life in Zambia. Today she is a NLD shareholder and acts as a liaison point of contact between us making the relevant introductions to key stakeholders, and helping to introduce shareholders from the diaspora to the reality of Zambia.

Joyce is the daughter of Mr. & Mrs. Mapoma who have been freedom fighters for decades and well respected members of the first independent government [1964].

They gave a deep insight into Zambia’s culture, history and political mindset. We discussed many things including the vision to change the direction of Black people at home and abroad. The synergy between us was amazing and much of what we wanted to do in 2019 was the work they had begun doing in the 60s. Three days post arrival in Zambia, following discussions with many potential partners, it was apparent that the seeds of NLD had been planted in Zambia. The priority for me at that point was ensuring that the people who joined me had a strong community mindset, this was imperative! However those three days leading to the inception of NLD and the various encounters along the way were nothing short of a divine intervention.

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BM: What was the strategy?

The main advantage to investing in Zambia is that the scale of economies is much better. It is easy to invest low and reap high, allowing you to increase your investment capital and invest in the community more. Pooling our resources this way allowed us to help each other, strengthening the unity of the team and enabling us to help on the ground.

There was certainly a large dose of good fortune on our side to and we have been blessed with amazing people who have contributed so much to NLD. One such individual was Denise Dje Komenan. Denise has been a fierce advocate for NLD from day one, spreading the word and bringing us many new opportunities including this interview. She saw the vision and is making it her own, an inspiration for us all.

BM: What are some of the challenges? What about any cultural and personal differences?

There have been a few, but I found the important thing was being able to overcome them. Most of the issues are just based on our need to learn more. We all are different and have different perceptions and expectations, so it takes time to understand each other after disagreements and keep the project going. Africa also moves at a different pace to the one I am used to, and getting things done can take longer than my patience would allow, but we have to adapt. I also discovered that the business employment structure for staff members is set up rather differently and took some getting used to. As an employer you are expected to care for and pay for the general wellbeing (difficulties and emergencies) of your staff. You do not just pay their wages and ignore their basic needs such as food and transportation. To the uninitiated, this can seem like paying twice, however once I understood the cultural aspect, I was able to adjust my way of thinking and see it as a much better way of working together.

Nevertheless a line had to be drawn to cover what could be termed reasonable extras and this falls within the remit of the Zambian shareholders.

We have been fortunate to have very good Zambian partners who have taken the time to explain some of the cultural nuances to us.

On the plus side, I do find the younger generation to be more forward thinking. They tend to be of the view that Africa is their oyster and are usually free from the preconceived ideas and fears which tend to plague and hold back the older generation. This allows them to be bolder in their entrepreneurial pursuits and more open to innovative ideas such as those advocated by NLD. The youngest member of the team is 26 years old and there is a preference to work with the younger generation more as their presence is the future of NLD. 26

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An unfortunate experience we went through in the early days was having some of our first consignment of equipment stolen at the port. Zambia being landlocked meant we had to travel through Namibia to get to the goods and not understanding process and lacking experience cost us dearly, but we learnt from the it. There were ten shareholders at the time and one of the benefits of having a community is the joint commiserating, learning and progressing.

BM: Can more people get involved?

Certainly. Due to the longevity of NLD’s vision and the fact that some of its ideas will still be relevant 20 - 30 years from now, the 18 – 35 year age bracket is preferred. We have around 25 shareholders and while we are not actively looking for new ones, there is currently no limit on the number of young and talented people who can join NLD. It is worth noting that the Zambia project is very much a pilot project. After successful implementation, we would like to expand the vision and possibly revisit Ghana, the Gambia and the countries around Zambia.

Marcus Garvey was talking about this very issue back in the 1920s: “Africa for the Africans, at home & abroad”. NLD simply wishes to provide likeminded individuals with the tools needed to get the wheels turning in Africa’s direction! The Honourable Elijah Muhammad taught us that if someone is drinking from a dirty glass you only need to offer them a clean glass – our approach is to enhance what already exists in Africa and offer an example of what we can achieve in unity.

BM: What sort of amenities exist to support this vision?

We are moving into that initial vision with our business and trading activities - we intend to build and introduce whatever services we need to be successful, for instance: a school, a town hall/ community centre, a business centre complete with offices etc. and also a garden to ensure there is an agricultural arm to the development producing local organic food.

The schooling aspect resonates with me and is the backbone of NLD. I have never been a fan of the education system here and most of my children were home schooled until the age of 16 when they went to college and university.

If your GCSEs can be completed in 1 year, once basic reading and Maths have been taught, why spend 11 years in a system that is diametrically opposed your development & survival?

We can do better if we take charge and work together.

Many of our supporters and NLD shareholders are seeking a better place to raise and educate their children so devising our own school system made a lot of sense.

It is clear that the status quo has never served our needs and the time to challenge the system is nigh. We have been blindly following our enemies for far too long and this is not beneficial to us, as a race. It is time to Just like in the book of Exodus, where the people were reluctant to leave for fear of upsetting the Pharaoh, similarly today, lots of people are fearful of upsetting the status quo.

Most Black people fail to see that the system, institutionally racist as it is, is designed to lure them into a false sense of security, keeping them in an impoverished state of mind and out of prosperity.

NLD’s approach is to think outside the box - for instance, with several trips planned from the UK to Zambia, NLD is looking into the possibility of chartering its own flight. In some quarters this may sound out of the ordinary, but if the figures add up and it brings some self-autonomy into the equation, then why not?

BM: Given all that has happened over the last six months culminating in the Black Lives Matter movement gaining global momentum, there has never been a better time for Black people to seriously consider moving to the African continent.

The move is usual and an individual one involving a family or a couple, but what you have done is unique and effective. How is this manifesting now?

The call for independence of the people and selfdetermination was made years ago – these were the doctrines preached by the likes of Elijah Muhammad, Edward Blyden, Marcus Garvey, Maurice Bishop: their calls for freedom have been largely ignored, until now.

For NLD, if you wish to join the team, having the right philosophy is important. If the focus is money, then NLD is not for you, for individual wealth cannot be obtained at the expense of the people. So it is about growing the team with a select few individuals and if we can unite with 5, 10 or 20 individuals who understand the vision, then we can start taking incremental steps. NLD started with just 4 members, and then increased to 10, starting with the first shareholder, Brother Raymond an architect supporting the cause with his encouragement and money. NLD is now a private limited company with over 25 shareholders including lay people and professionals - we have artists, journalists, mechanics, builders, accountants, lawyers and architects.

Another thing that is unique about NLD ,is that we wish to promote the program, regardless of location. If you are based in another country but wish to incorporate the NLD model to build a community from the ground up, we will applaud and assist you in whatever way possible. Our wish is to see thriving black communities across the globe.

These are just some of the principles we stand by. We are currently working with a team based in Kenya, sharing the NLD model and vision with him. It would be a source of pride for us to see it succeed in Kenya. We are quite happy to export the model to the Caribbean and America too, as some of our shareholders hail from the USA. Where there is a concentration of our people, this is fertile ground for the concept to grow. Life support must be administered to our flailing black economy, particularly in light of recent developments such as the “Black Lives Matter” campaign.

Our priority is the improvement and self-determination of our people. The concept is idea-specific, not locationspecific. As the president of Rwanda Paul Kagame once commented: “we do not need donor money to clean our own backyards” – a successful black economy would provide us with the sustainability and security which has eluded us for centuries.

BM: People are sometimes cautious about investing in Africa and working with other black people: how are you building the trust?

We see this as a non-issue and push forward regardless.

Ultimately it is better to follow your spirit and trust rather than not trust at all. I also find that there are a lot of indoctrination symptoms suffered by some black people – at some point there is a need to let go of the kidnapper and be cured of our Stockholm syndrome. The Isis Papers

by Frances Cress Welsing describes the neuroses of white supremacy in some detail. If as Black person, you find that you have more love and trust for the white man, but cannot love and trust the Black man, then there is something wrong.

Yes, there was a time when the prevailing attitude was: “every man for themselves” because of poverty and lack, but in present day times, if we engender a culture of working together so we can ALL get what we want, we win! When working with our local partners, we try to lead by example and build trust and show them respect, as opposed to adopting that superiority attitude typically displayed by some westerners. It is important

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to take time to study and learn about your audience and treat them as you would like to be treated. Sometimes the lack of trust could also be a simple misunderstanding of the different cultures.As a race we have got to stop being hateful towards ourselves – if the attitude is doubt and mistrust, you will have those very same attitudes reflected back at you. What is the point of being a doctor and not liking humanity? What’s the point of being a teacher if you don’t like children? Your attitude counts and contributes to your success or otherwise.

What sort of people do NLD approach?

Primarily the young people, those in the 18-30s age bracket. We strive to attract the right young people with the apposite mindset and to this end we will be holding a conference in August to showcase what we have on offer for our youth, demystifying any misconceptions, showing them what is available in Africa and how much better their future can be in the Motherland.

Do they have to be professionals or tradespeople?

If they are great, if not, they just need to be willing to learn as it is more about your attitude and view of the world.

Can they set up a business in your community or do they have to look for jobs?

Yes! We all should set up business and create jobs! NLD would be happy to support our partners and shareholders with any well-thought out, viable venture.

BM: Is it possible to own a home in Zambia?

Yes, but It is a totally different ball game. As a British national you cannot own land in Zambia. The idea of land ownership is very different - the land belongs to the people and the President is their representative. As we grow and bring value to Zambia over time, we will as investors etc. earn the right and become entitled to own land in our own right. However, we cannot arrive and immediately expect to buy land to own forever, this is a very western mindset.

As a Zambian company however, we are allowed to own the land we develop. At NLD we go, we share, we build and demonstrate our value, and citizenship will follow after a few short years (unless you marry a Zambian). I see a lot of value in this system.

Home ownership sometimes brings out a different side to human beings and has become more important than community development, which has led to a drastic decline in our families and communities. We plan to own property as a community and attempt to minimise greed and selfishness.

BM: What about healthcare and insurance?

Zambia has a great healthcare system especially in Lusaka, the capital. The cost is reasonable and health insurance is readily available. From our research, the monthly premium 28

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for good health insurance would cost less than a prescription charge. We plan to partner with local health professionals and also build a clinic within our residential plot.

BM: How secure is an investor’s money?

Upon entering into an agreement with NLD, a receipt is issued and both parties enter into a shareholder’s contract – all transactions are fully transparent.

There are lawyers and accountants there to oversee all dealings and NLD operates much like any other company in the UK. Financial reports are sent to shareholders regularly and business reports made via shareholders’ meetings twice a month. It is worth noting that many of NLD’s original founders started with a handshake and a nod and this is testament to the fact that it goes beyond the £5,000 investment. For any investment to succeed, an investor needs to overcome doubt and more importantly know WHY he is investing. Above all, we always advise that potential investors first conduct their own independent due diligence.

BM: When is the site likely to be completed?

We are simultaneously working on 3 sites in stages and expect the residential plot to complete approximately 18 months after the lockdown ends.

The farm should be operational with crops, fish farming and livestock within the next 12 months. The mining operation is ready to trade in minerals, but full-scale processing operation should be ready in 18 to 24 months.

We regularly travel across Zambia in search of small scale producers and entrepreneurs to ascertain what they need in order to be successful. We then endeavour to help them achieve their goals and this has yielded great results for both parties.

The architectural team is still laying out the design and has not broken ground yet – it was due to commence in April but was delayed as a result of COVID-19. Breaking ground to completion should last 18 – 24 months.

BM: What is the next big thing on the agenda for NLD? We are currently consolidating last year’s gains and settling in to our collective mission. The next big task is to move our shareholders and base to Zambia full time. We then look forward to welcoming all who see the benefit of this vision to partner with us, or take it and continue the journey onwards.

Bakita: KK

Photo: contributed. Bakita Kasadha

Bakita was invited to take part in Poetic Unity’s Quarantine Challenge. Poetic Unity is a Brixton based charity using poetry as a tool to support young people create positive change in their lives:

SPEAK YOUR

TRUTH Meet Bakita: KK

Overcoming self-stigma to achieve your potential

[

Bakita Kasadha is a writer, researcher, health activist and poet better known as BAKITA:KK.

[

“No one can tell our stories like we can” underpins her why.

Click for video

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The Blessing

Credit: Amazing Places on Our planet

Zambia Mosi-oa-Tunya ‘The Smoke that Thunders’

All About Zambia

Let’s learn about Zambia

Credit: Sebastian ioan

The Blessing Zambia

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Fatherhood

FATHER AND SON DIGGING DEEP

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Page Institute of Archaeology Heritage and Museums Diversity Scholarship The Institute is funding a heritage diversity scholarship for a candidate from black and minority ethnic backgrounds as these groups are currently under-represented within the heritage sector.

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faith on tv

iChurch

Churches that already had a strong, online presence raised the bar by preaching to empty pews. On the upside they gained a new ‘homechurched’ congregation.

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A Minister of Religion

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Cosmos Maduka - Millionaire and Street Preacher

Meet millionaire Cosmos Maduka, the founder of the Coscharis Group, who started making money selling car parts but now trades in Rolls Royce. In his remarkable life he has dodged bullets during the Biafran war, worked for seven years without pay before being sacked by his uncle.

CEO of Coscharis Motors,

Cosmos Maduka

Preaching the Gospel by the Roadside In Lagos

Cosmos Maduka

Founder of Coscharis Group Transform your viewing...

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Just Ask Ariel

Dear Black Man,

I Was Made To Love You

O

n Monday, while at lunch with a girlfriend, I received a happy birthday text message from a male friend that I had not spoken to in quite some time. Since we were both out and about and had a lot of catching up to do, we made plans to talk later on that night. So when my phone rang at 9:55 PM, I couldn’t have been more excited to hear from him and to catch up, especially since so much had happened over the past year. The conversation flowed effortlessly from one topic to the next and it was as though no time had passed since the last time we’d seen each other.

Soon the conversation shifted to our current relationship statuses. I was glad to learn he’d finally ended a relationship that he never should have entered and was now seeing someone who made him very happy. But the call quickly took an unexpected turn when he said that he had something to tell me, and made me promise not to hate him once he did. I laughed and promised because I figured whatever he had to tell me, couldn’t possibly be as bad as he’d imagined.

He then took a deep breath and quickly blurted out, “I’ve jumped ship and I am no longer dating black women, ever again!”

I assumed he was joking, but unfortunately, I was wrong.

Needless to say the conversation went downhill from there.

But before I go any further, I want to make it crystal clear that I do not have an issue with him dating outside of our race. My issue is that he has decided to date all other races, except his own. I can’t begin to comprehend how a person decides that their own race is no longer suited for them.

Fighting the urge to curse him out and hang up on the phone, he immediately began to plead his case, stating he valued our friendship and my opinion. That he didn’t want to lose me…a black woman… as a friend. So, I allowed him to explain, like any reasonable person would do. As I tried to allow cooler heads to prevail, I

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attempted to be as analytical as possible, even though my heart was breaking into a million pieces. His words kept echoing over in my mind as he stated that women of other races appreciated, valued and supported him more than the black women he’d dated in the past. He continued on, stating that these women were just simply more fun and easier to get along with. He also felt that his current girlfriend, who is Indian, relates to him more so than any other woman he’s dated than ever before.

I probed deeper, asking him what lead him to this conclusion and upon hearing his answer, immediately started defending all of the black women he’d sworn off for life. Reminding him that despite his experiences, all black women are not the same and that a few bad apples should not ruin it for an entire barrel or in this case, an entire race.

Not to mention that his mother is black and that if it weren’t for her, he wouldn’t even exist.

In addition, it seemed as though he thought that women of other races didn’t come with their own set of issues. That they were somehow issue free.

We went back and forth for almost three hours about his stupidity, which only caused both of our comments to go left. Mine because I was hurt and his because he just didn’t care how ignorant he sounded. I soon began to realize that even though we’d know each other for several years, attended the same historically black university, worked at the same crappy job, which ironically is where we first met, and spent years growing our friendship, he’d become a stranger to me.

I remember his first day at work. I started my career in higher education shortly before him and we ended up in the same department.

He’d recently moved back to Florida after a short time in Atlanta. To my surprise, he remembered seeing me around campus and we instantly bonded as we swapped stories about college and life thereafter.

As our conversation proceeded and he said one stupid thing after another, always ending it with, “Please don’t hate me,” it was starting to become hard for me not to. Our conversation shifted from relationships to race relations, and what he no longer liked about our culture. I actually agreed with him on somethings, like the type of music we listen to and create. Most of it has awful lyrics mixed over a dope beat. I politely informed him that I rode around campus blasting Maroon 5 and that on most days, I prefer the John Mayer or Michael Buble station on Pandora, which I am constantly teased about by family and friends. He said that he and I were different and not the norm. But it was becoming abundantly clear to me that he was lost. He was hurt. He was angry. And because of that, he’d bought into the lies that the media spews daily about black women being combative, unattractive, and hard to love. He’d excelled in the military and had reached a point in his career where he’d “made it”. Now the only thing that was missing was his nonblack wife.

He’d accepted his position in society as the “token” black guy and was proud of it. While I on the other hand fought against being the token black girl after high school and refused to ever go back to being the polite, well mannered, smart, nonthreatening individual that I believe most people saw me as all throughout childhood and adolescence. Don’t get me wrong, I believe in treating all people with respect but I refuse to be anyone’s black friend just so they can prove to themselves and the world that they are not racist.

Despite him trying to convince me that we are not like the majority, I told him that even though I was different, surrounding myself with positive, intelligent, ambitious and respectable black men and women became my norm after attending a minority recruitment event at one of the most predominately white universities in Florida. During that weekend, I was surrounded by some of the brightest people I’d ever had the pleasure of meeting and most importantly, they looked like me! They talked like me, they cracked corny jokes like me and they wanted more out of life, like me. They wanted to be doctors, lawyers, scientists and engineers. I knew I’d found my tribe. I knew more of these people had to exist outside of Polk County, where I’d lived my whole life, and was determined to find them. We were nerds and proud of it. I no longer wanted to be the exception. I wanted to be the rule. I guess I never asked him what made him attend FAMU and just assumed it was because he was tired of the being the exception, like me.

As we circled back around to dating and he mentioned that he’d always dated women of all races, even in high school, if that really counts. He preferred mixed chicks, his words, not mine, because they looked exotic. It made me wonder if he’d noticed me around campus because everyone always thought I was West Indian, until they heard me speak. But I didn’t ask what made me memorable, because at this point, emotions were running high, and quite frankly, it now seemed irrelevant. I knew I couldn’t say anything to change his mind, at least not in one conversation. I’d actively listened to him and what I heard was that he was tired of not being accepted by black women because he wasn’t the “norm” by our culture’s standards. He’s 5’7, which isn’t very tall, he doesn’t listen to rap music, and he’s more into science than into sports.

And it made me wonder how many other black men felt this way. Felt that black women wouldn’t or don’t accept them for being “different.” I thought about the countless conversations I’d had with my other male friends who’d expressed similar sentiments, but I’d always brushed them off since they still dated black women.

I tried to get him to see that I understood, accepted, and even liked him for being “different.” You see, it’s a beautiful thing when one soul recognizes another and I became his friend so many years ago because I saw something in him. I know people change and that growing a part sometimes happens. But as our conversation came to an end, he asked me again not to hate him, which I jokingly and half seriously replied that I’d consider it. We said good night and promised to talk again soon. Maybe we’d even Skype next time because he missed our face to face conversations.

I won’t lie, our talk left my head reeling for days. I am still processing all of the mixed emotions that I am feeling. A part of me truly is happy that he’s happy, but another part of me is angry that he gave up on his own race because of the poor choices he made in women, which I’ll address in part 2.

There is a disconnect between black men and women that is to be growing stronger by the moment, and it seems to me that more black women than men are trying to fix it, and it is truly heart breaking.

Ariel Driskell is a writer and filmmaker based in Atlanta, GA. As a master storyteller (think Yoda meets Issa Rae), she believes in using words to heal people, as well as sharing her perspectives on life and love with hope, and a dash of humor.

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Relax

LAUGHTER Credit: Apple

GOOD FOR THE SOUL

Geeky Gadget

Funny how life works 38

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2020

Spring quarter into SSS

Nigeria Stories “I am Nigerian because a white man created Nigeria and gave me that identity.

I am black because the white man constructed black to be as different as possible from his white. But I was Igbo before the white man came.”

— Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie

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Last Word

WHATEVER IT TAKES TO LIVE YOUR DREAM Transform your viewing...

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