50plus LIFE York County February 2019

Complimentary | York County Edition

February 2019 • Vol. 20 No. 2

UKES ON THE RISE page 4

Writing to Preserve and Revive Memory page 12

special section: tours and trips page 14

Art & Antiques by Dr. Lori

Pets for the Presidents Lori Verderame

March 26, 2019 May 30, 2019 9 a.m. – 2 p.m.

Wyndham Hotel York 2000 Loucks Road York

9 a.m. – 2 p.m.

Crowne Plaza Reading Hotel 1741 Papermill Road Wyomissing

These events are FREE to attend.

Veterans (of all ages) and the military community and their families are invited to join us!

The Expo brings federal, state, and local agencies together with area businesses to provide information and resources to veterans and their families.

The Job Fair brings veterans and spouses who need jobs together with employers who can benefit from this rich source of talent to aid their organizations.

At the Expo

Veterans Benefits & Services Medical/Nonmedical Resources Products and Services Available Support/Assistance Programs Education/Training Services

At the Job Fair

Employers Job Counseling Workshops Employment Seminars Resume Writing Assistance Hosted by:

Sponsor & Exhibitor Opportunities Available

www.veteransexpo.com

Brought to you by:

&

2

February 2019

(717) 285-1350 www.olpevents.com

50plus LIFE t

With Presidents since the middle Day upon us, there of the 1900s is an interest in followed in the ways that our the paw-steps presidents relax of President and enjoy family Franklin Delano time.

Roosevelt’s Eisenhower faithful played golf and companion painted landscapes, named Fala, a Reagan rode black Scottish horses, and Obama terrier. played basketball.

Fala traveled But, many of our with Roosevelt past presidents also on trips abroad Millie’s Book (Barbara Bush) enjoyed downtime and was often with a first family photographed Presidents Day: pet. by the press.

Monday, Feb. 18 During the He did tricks first decades of and entertained the 1900s, the White House was full the president, diplomats, and others of pets. President William McKinley during the period before and during owned an exotic Mexican yellowWorld War II. headed parrot.

Fala resembled Miss Beazley, President Teddy Roosevelt, a Rough another Scottish terrier that arrived Rider and big-game hunter who at the White House in January 2005 decorated the State Dining Room during George W. Bush’s time in with his taxidermy hunting trophies, office. Miss Beazley was a birthday brought pets to the White House. present for first lady Laura Bush.

The Roosevelts kept owls, lizards, Like her daughter-in-law, first roosters, badgers, guinea pigs, snakes, lady Barbara Bush also had a dog raccoons, hyenas, ponies, and a macaw in the White House, a springer named Eli Yale at 1600 Pennsylvania spaniel named Millie. In 1992, Ave. Millie “penned” a New York Times William Taft brought the last cow, nonfiction bestseller entitled Millie’s the most common U.S. presidential Book: As Dictated to Barbara Bush, pet at the time, to the White House. describing presidential life.

President Wilson let sheep graze on In terms of animal vigor, Teddy the White House lawn, along with a Roosevelt’s pony Algonquin not only tobacco-chewing ram named Old Ike. took a ride in a White House elevator, Not to be outdone, President Calvin but also rivaled Caroline Kennedy’s Coolidge maintained a mini-zoo at pony named Macaroni, a gift from the White House with many breeds Vice President Lyndon B. Johnson. of dog and various canaries, geese, Macaroni was one of many pet gifts and mockingbirds. Foreign dignitaries that the Kennedy children received brought exotic pets to the White during their father’s term.

House as gifts, such as a wallaby, In 1960, Premier Nikita pigmy hippo, bear, and lion cubs.

Khrushchev of the Soviet Union The Roosevelts, the Coolidges, and gave Caroline Kennedy a 6-monththe Kennedys had a great many — old white, mixed-breed dog named nearly 25 — pets.

Pushinka (“Fluffy”), as noted on the Some of the most interesting dog’s Russian passport. Pushinka had presidential pets at the White House gone into space on Sputnik 2. www.50plusLifePA.com

The Clintons had a dog and a cat. President Obama had two large Portuguese water dogs, Bo and Sunny.

In 2009, Bo was a gift from Sen. Ted Kennedy, who helped Obama keep a promise to his young daughters that if he won the 2008 election, they would get a puppy.

When it comes to pet names, President Johnson had two beagles whose names were hard to forget.

The pair were national celebrities, the focus of press photos and magazine articles, lived in a newly redesigned doghouse, and had the run of the

Johnson White House.

The beagles were named simply “Him” and “Her.” Happy Presidents Day!

Financial counselors work closely with the consumer’s care manager. No experience is necessary.

Areas of need are in the northern and western parts of York County, including the Hanover area.

These are volunteer opportunities for both men and women of all ages (18 or older), who like to help others.

No experience is needed.

Training for both programs is provided by YCAAA. For more information please contact Hope Eberly, volunteer coordinator, at (717) 771-9610, (800) 632-9073, or at hceberly@ yorkcountypa.gov.

Volunteer applications can be downloaded from the “Forms and Documents” page of ycaaa.org.

Diabetes Workshop Planned The York County Area Agency on Aging is offering free diabetes self-management workshops from 12:30-3 p.m. Wednesdays, Feb. 13 to March 20, at the York Township Park Building, 25 Oak St., York Township.

York County residents 60 and older living with Type 2 diabetes, and caregivers age 60 and older caring for someone with Type 2 diabetes, can participate in the workshops.

The interactive program spans six weekly workshops taught by certified instructors through the agency.

Developed by the Self-Management Resource Center, formerly Stanford University Patient Education Program, www.50plusLifePA.com

With 30 Years of Real Estate Experience

Dr. Lori Verderame is an author and award-winning TV personality who appears on History channel and Fox Business Network. With a Ph.D. from Penn State University and experience appraising 20,000 antiques every year from audiences nationwide, Dr. Lori presents antique appraisal events. Visit www.DrLoriV.com or call (888) 4311010.

Agency Seeks Volunteers for Visitor, Financial Programs The York County Area Agency on Aging is seeking volunteers for its friendly visitor and financial counselor programs.

A volunteer friendly visitor is someone who is willing to share an hour or two each week with a homebound elderly person.

Many of these elderly people have very limited social contact. These visits are often the high point of their week, whether spent reading, writing letters, playing card or board games, or just chatting.

Dover and Dillsburg are areas of need.

Financial counselors visit older adults on a regular basis and assist them with budgeting, balancing a checkbook, paying bills, and other financial functions.

Senior Real Estate Specialist

this health-promotion program provides tools for managing diabetes, dealing with difficult emotions, and breaking the symptom cycle that comes with the disease.

The program introduces participants to self-management tools, such as healthy eating, monitoring blood sugar, action planning, and dealing with difficult emotions.

A companion book, Living a Healthy Life with Chronic Conditions, 4th Edition, and an audio relaxation tape will be provided for all participants.

Preregistration is required by calling Megan Craley at (717) 771-9610.

• 2016 Realtor of the Year •2 014 President of Realtor’s Association of York and Adams County

Paula Musselman Selling or buying a house?

Please call me – I’ll guide you every step of the way!

Office: (717) 793-9678 Cell: (717) 309-6921 2525 Eastern Blvd.

York, PA 17402 Paula1159@aol.com

• Licensed in PA and MD •P roviding Reliable and Trustworthy Contracting and Moving Resources •S pecializing in Senior Moves and Transitions

Taking the time to make your transaction smooth and stress free.

Senior Real Estate Specialist ®

For Love of Family Devotion. Compassion. Dignity. When your loved one needs help, join hands with Homeland at Home.

We are privileged to be part of your caregiving team.

Hospice 717-221-7890 | HomeHealth 717-412-0166 | HomeCare 717-221-7892 HomelandatHome.org | Hospice volunteers are always welcome.

Community Outreach of Homeland Center 50plus LIFE t

| Harrisburg, PA February 2019

3

Cover Story

Ukes on the Rise

Corporate Office

3912 Abel Drive, Columbia, PA 17512 Phone 717.285.1350 • Fax 717.285.1360 Chester County: 610.675.6240 Cumberland County/Dauphin County: 717.770.0140 Berks County/Lancaster County/ Lebanon County/York County: 717.285.1350 E-mail address: info@onlinepub.com Website address: www.onlinepub.com

PRESIDENT AND PUBLISHER Donna K. Anderson

EDITORIAL

Vice President and Managing Editor Christianne Rupp Editor, 50plus Publications Megan Joyce

ART DEPARTMENT Project Coordinator Renee McWilliams Production Artist Lauren Phillips

BUSINESS DEVELOPMENT

Senior Marketing Consultants Joshua Binkley Jennifer Schmalhofer Angie Willis Marketing Consultants Joseph Herr Rebecca Leader Events Manager Kimberly Shaffer Marketing Coordinator Kelsey Fishburn Account Service Coordinator Emily Polito

ADMINISTRATION Business Manager Elizabeth Duvall

Member of

Awards

50plus LIFE is published by On-Line Publishers, Inc. and is distributed monthly among senior centers, retirement communities, banks, grocers, libraries and other outlets serving the senior community.

On-Line Publishers, Inc. will not knowingly accept or publish advertising which may be fraudulent or misleading in nature.

Views expressed in opinion stories, contributions, articles and letters are not necessarily the views of the publisher. The appearance of advertisements for products or services does not constitute an endorsement of the particular product or service. The publisher will not be responsible for mistakes in advertisements unless notified within five days of publication. On-Line Publishers, Inc. reserves the right to revise or reject any and all advertising. No part of this publication may be reproduced or reprinted without permission of On-Line Publishers, Inc. We will not knowingly publish any advertisement or information not in compliance with the Federal Fair Housing Act, Pennsylvania State laws or other local laws.

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February 2019

50plus LIFE t

By Megan Joyce In America, the ukulele has struggled to attain a cachet of legitimacy since folk musician Tiny Tim employed the petite, stringed instrument to score his kitschy pop single, “Tiptoe through the Tulips,” more than 50 years ago.

Members of Ukulele Uprising!, a community ukulele orchestra based in Lancaster, love that the uke is a simple — but not simplistic — instrument, and know that much of its charm lies in its relative ease of play.

Dana Edsall, a retired postal employee from Washington Boro and integral member of UU!, first picked up a ukulele more than a decade ago while visiting Hawaii. He found the fingering to be similar to that of a traditional guitar, which Edsall had played — “albeit poorly,” he said — for a number of years.

“The uke is easy to learn,” Edsall said.

“It only has four strings, and these are generally made of nylon, which is easier on the fingers than guitar strings. That ease of playing and the sweetness of sound are what attract so many people.”

Fellow Lancastrian Steve Patterson founded Ukulele Uprising! in 2012, and since its inception, the group has grown from just four attendees at the group’s first weekly meeting to now more than 75, about 20 of whom are “regulars.”

UU! is open to anyone interested, and membership is free. Novices can learn on loaner ukuleles, funded through the group’s collaboration with Music for Everyone, a nonprofit charitable organization that raises awareness and resources to strengthen the role music plays in local schools and communities, according to its website (musicforeveryone. org).

UU! players’ skill levels range from complete beginner to intermediate; membership age also spans a wide range.

“Right now, our youngest regular is 14, and on any given week, at least a couple of Medicare-eligible players are there,” Edsall said. “We also have one family represented by three generations: a father, daughter, and granddaughter.”

The club’s weekly strum sessions feature a variety of musical genres, from folk, standards, and Hawaiian and Latin songs

Photo credit: Eric Max

Dana Edsall, right, with wife Sherry Getz at the 2017 Ukulele Harmonic Convergence.

Uke players of all ages and skill levels are welcome to attend the group’s Tuesday-evening practices in the lobby of VisionCorps in downtown Lancaster.

Photo credit: Eric Max

Members of Ukulele Uprising! perform on stage during the 2018 Ukulele Harmonic Convergence held at Tellus360 in Lancaster.

www.50plusLifePA.com

to Bob Dylan, the Grateful Dead, and the Beatles. as performances at Barnstormers games, the Ware “Rock ’n’ roll is well represented,” Edsall said.

Center, and the Red Rose Run. “We’ve added a ukulele version of Guns N’ Roses’ Summertime is usually busiest, when the demand ‘Sweet Child of Mine’ that’s really pretty. A couple of for luau-themed parties is higher. our members become ‘Axlettes’ in the chorus on that “Our favorite venue, though, is playing on the one.” street for one of MFE’s Music Fridays,” Edsall said.

Edsall said the group is eager to expand the “Those are vibrant evenings in downtown Lancaster, diversity of its members; Music for Everyone has with lots of people wandering around and lots of undertaken targeted outreach programs to connect energy in the air. We play for others those nights, but with the rich cultural diversity in Lancaster city. we play for ourselves, too.”

“Every new member brings their own tastes, The group will also be participating in its fourth expressed through song,” he said. “Expanding our annual Ukulele Harmonic Convergence on March cultural base would help us grow and improve as 2 from noon to 6 p.m. at Tellus360 in Lancaster. musicians and people.”

UU! co-hosts the event with Hummelstown’s Central Bringing authentic culture to Ukulele Uprising Pennsylvania Ukulele Club and the Philadelphia is Hawaiian native Mika Cox McDougall, now a Main Line Ukulele Group. longtime UU! member who adds hula dancing to “Everyone is welcome, it’s free, and you’ll hear over some of the group’s performances.

100 ukuleles from across Pennsylvania and nearby McDougall, now of Peach Bottom, moved to states playing together,” Edsall said.

Philadelphia in 1997 and then to Lancaster in 2002.

Ukulele Uprising! meets at 7:30 p.m. each Tuesday “When I moved … I was missing home, and going in the lobby of VisionCorps at 244 N. Queen St., back to hula dance and Hawaiian music really kind Lancaster. The group pays VisionCorps a lease of $1 Photo credit: Eric Max of helped me with my homesickness and made me per year and, in return, teaches ukulele classes to kids Native Hawaiian Mika Cox McDougall adds hula dancing to some of the feel more in touch with back home,” McDougall, a who are part of the VisionCorps community. group’s performances.

Hawaiian hula dance instructor and mother of two “You can’t help smiling when you play a ukulele,” daughters, said.

Edsall said. “Being around so many people, singing, Although the instrument originated on the playing, and smiling together is just wonderful.” islands, its appeal has extended beyond Hawaiian music, McDougall said, For more information on Ukulele Uprising!, email uke.rise@gmail.com, call with many millennials being drawn to the “bright, happy instrument.” Each (717) 872-7991, or visit sites.google.com/site/ukeuplanc or www.facebook.com/ year, McDougall teaches a master class on the ukulele at Franklin & Marshall ukuleleuprising.

College.

“Of course, [people] don’t take it seriously; they think it’s a toy,” she said of the ukulele. “But it has a really rich history to the islands, and it’s really changed Hawaiian music through the years.”

McDougall joined Ukulele Uprising! several years ago, bringing not only her cultural heritage, but also her musical chops to the burgeoning group of uke players. In addition to playing her six ukuleles of varying shapes and sizes, McDougall has played the violin since childhood.

“I’m able to easily play music [on the ukulele] without being such a trained musician like you kind of have to do on the violin,” she said. “It’s just more casual and inviting.”

A welcome side effect of the group’s visibility is the increased interest and “legitimization” of the ukulele in the local community.

Read it online, in print, and UU! contributes to a summer arts program run by the YWCA, and they on mobile/tablet devices. have “started getting requests for ukuleles in schools,” McDougall said. “Even onlinepub.com some of our members — a lot are elementary school music teachers — now teach the ukulele to their students.”

Ukulele Uprising!’s performance schedule is busy and includes regular gigs at parties, fundraisers, senior centers, retirement homes, and weddings, as well

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February 2019

5

Dear Pharmacist

Can You Eat Dark Chocolate with a Milk Allergy?

Suzy Cohen

Dark chocolate is a staple in my house. What are you supposed to do if you’re allergic to milk and want to eat dark chocolate?

It’s a good question.

Milk is actually allowed as an ingredient in “dark” chocolate, but sometimes it produces a harmful allergy in dairy-sensitive individuals.

The reality is that most chocolates contain some milk, and it’s undisclosed.

The FDA actually tested 100 different brands of dark chocolate bars, and they specifically tested it for the presence of milk. Of these 100 bars, only six of them listed milk as an ingredient!

The other 88 bars did not disclose milk as an ingredient, yet 51 of them contained milk.

Dairy-tainted chocolates are among the most frequently reported allergic reactions.

It’s unfortunate but true that milk can get into a dark-chocolate product even when it’s not directly added. The problem happens because

dark chocolate is often produced on the same equipment that makes milk-chocolate bars, and traces of milk often inadvertently wind up in the dark-chocolate batter. It’s essentially a problem of cross-contamination.

My best suggestion to you is to completely avoid dark chocolate (if you’re allergic to milk or dairy) unless the brand you’re buying is made on equipment dedicated to dark-chocolate bars only. This is hard to find, but possible.

The food industry doesn’t mean to make people sick, but these oversights can lead to pain and suffering for some of you. As a result, you see warnings on the label that serve as a wink of sorts: This product “may contain dairy” or “may contain traces of milk,” or this one: “manufactured in a facility that uses milk.”

There are others, but if you’re my best friend, I would tell you to replace the word “may” with “probably”!

The take-home message is you should not

Valentine’s Day: Thursday, Feb. 14

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Attention: RETIREMENT HOMES, CLUBS AND ORGANIZATIONS. Looking for entertainment?

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We have many variety shows featuring the music from the 1930s to the 60s.

Songs by legendary artists like Bing Crosby, Frank Sinatra, Doris Day, Kay Starr, Dean Martin, Patsy Cline, and the Mills Brothers.

Specialty shows include …

Songs from the WWII Years • The Post WWII Years: 1945 – 1955 AMERICA: From Sea to Shining Sea Salute to the Rat Pack (or if you prefer, just Sinatra) Elvis & Patsy • Classic Country Please contact Memory Music to book your next event!

Phone: (717) 846-6126 6

February 2019

E-mail: memrymusic@aol.com 50plus LIFE t

The answer: Although tremendous strides have been made in Advanced Hearing Aid Technology, those cost reductions have not been passed on to you. Until now...

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assume that your dark chocolate is free of milk, and you should not consume it if you have serious allergic reactions to milk, regardless of the label.

I have a checklist of 14 alias names for milk-derived ingredients that may be hidden in your food. My list will help you find undisclosed milk in your candy bars and chocolates. Visit my website (suzycohen.com) for more information.

I’ll also tell you why some chocolate bars aren’t good for vegans. Here’s a fun fact: White chocolate doesn’t contain any cacao whatsoever. It’s just a combination of cocoa butter, sugar, and milk, but it contains no cocoa solids,

like dark and milk chocolate have. It’s definitely something to avoid if you’re dairy intolerant or allergic to milk.

In closing, when it comes to dark chocolate, the dairy-free claims and statements on the label are best completely disregarded if the manufacturer fails to use dedicated machinery and equipment to avoid cross-contamination.

This information is not intended to diagnose, prevent, or treat your disease. For more information about the author, visit SuzyCohen.com

Free Tax Help Available in York County The AARP Foundation Tax-Aide Program is offering free tax service for taxpayers of all ages, especially adults 50 and older, during the 2018 tax season.

Last year in York County, more than 60 volunteers helped 3,500 taxpayers file their federal, state, and local income tax returns at 14 different locations around the county.

There is no fee, and AARP membership is not required.

Taxpayers should bring their photo ID and proof of Social Security or ITIN numbers for anyone on the tax return, including children or other claimed dependents. Also, last year’s tax return is helpful if available.

AARP Tax-Aide volunteers can prepare most personal income tax returns, including those with basic self-employment income.

They are not trained to do business returns, such as corporate, partnership, limited partnership, farm income, or rental income. These types of returns are beyond the scope of the Tax-Aide program.

Appointments are available at the following locations: Aldersgate United Methodist Church (York) – (717) 771-9042 Dover Township Library – (717) 292-6814 Eastern Area Senior Center – (717) 252-1641 Golden Connections Community Center (Red Lion) – (717) 244-7229 Hanover Church of the Brethren – (717) 633-6353 Messiah United Methodist Church (York) – (717) 771-9042 Red Land Senior Center (Lewisberry) – (717) 938-4649 Shrewsbury Grace UM Church – (717) 993-3488 Union Fire Company (Manchester) – (717) 771-9042 Windy Hill on the Campus (Spring Grove) – (717) 225-0733 York Alliance Church – (717) 771-9042

At Your Fingertips Helpful numbers, hotlines, and local businesses and organizations eager to serve you—all just a phone call away.

Animal Hospitals Community Animal Hospital Donald A. Sloat, D.V.M. 400 S. Pine St., York (717) 845-5669

Health & Medical Services Alzheimer’s Association (717) 651-5020

Automobile Sales/Service Gordon’s Body Shop, Inc. 10 Mill St., Stewartstown (717) 993-2263

American Diabetes Association (800) 342-2383

Energy Assistance Low-Income Energy Assistance (717) 787-8750

Alzheimer’s Information Clearinghouse (800) 367-5115

CONTACT Helpline (717) 652-4400 The National Kidney Foundation (800) 697-7007 or (717) 757-0604 Social Security Information (800) 772-1213

Entertainment Dutch Apple Dinner Theatre 510 Centerville Road, Lancaster (717) 898-1900

Healthcare Information Pennsylvania HealthCare Cost Containment (717) 232-6787

Funeral & Cremation Services Cremation Society of Pennsylvania Serving York County (800) 720-8221

Hearing Services Pennsylvania Office for the Deaf and Hard of Hearing (800) 233-3008 V/TTY

Home Care Services Homeland at Home Serving all of York County (717) 221-7892 Visiting Angels Living Assistance Services Hanover: (717) 630-0067 Lancaster: (717) 393-3450 York: (717) 751-2488

Pharmacies CVS/pharmacy www.cvs.com

Hospice Services Homeland at Home Serving all of York County (717) 221-7890

real estate Berkshire Hathaway Paula Musselman (717) 793-9678 (Office) (717) 309-6921 (Cell)

Housing Assistance Housing Authority of York (717) 845-2601

Services York County Area Agency on Aging (717) 771-9610

Property Tax/Rent Rebate (888) 728-2937 Insurance Medicare (800) 633-4227 Vibra Health Plan (844) 660-2961 (TTY: 711)

Not an all-inclusive list of advertisers in your area.

www.50plusLifePA.com

Insurance – Long-Term Care Apprise Insurance Counseling (717) 771-9610 or (800) 632-9073

Veterans Services Lebanon VA Medical Center 1700 S. Lincoln Ave., Lebanon (717) 228-6000 or (800) 409-8771 Volunteer opportunities RSVP of the Capital Region (443) 619-3842 50plus LIFE t

February 2019

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CCRCs/ Life Plan Communities Designed with their residents’ changing needs in mind, CCRCs (Continuing Care Retirement Communities)/Life Plan Communities offer a tiered approach to the aging process.

Healthy adults entering these communities can live independently. When assistance with everyday activities becomes necessary, they can transition to personal care, assisted living, rehabilitation, or nursing care facilities.

Some CCRCs/Life Plan Communities have designated dementia areas that address the progressing needs of people who have any form of dementia. In addition, some communities have sought out and earned accreditation from CARF International, signifying they have met CARF’s stringent set of quality standards. CCRCs/Life Plan Communities enable older adults to remain in one care system for the duration of their lives, with much of their future care already figured out—creating both comfort and peace of mind.

The listings with a shaded background have additional information about their center in a display advertisement in this edition.

Bethany Village

Cornwall Manor

Homeland Center

Pleasant View Retirement Community

Woodcrest Villa Mennonite Home Communities

Zerbe Retirement Community

325 Wesley Drive Mechanicsburg, PA 17055 Stephanie Lightfoot Director of Sales & Marketing (717) 766-0279 www.bethanyvillage.org

544 North Penryn Road Manheim, PA 17545 Amanda Hall Sales & Marketing Manager (717) 664-6207 ahall@pleasantviewrc.org www.pleasantviewrc.org

1 Boyd Street, P.O. Box 125 Cornwall, PA 17016 Jennifer Margut Vice President of Marketing and Public Relations (717) 274-8092 info@cornwallmanor.org www.cornwallmanor.org

2001 Harrisburg Pike Lancaster, PA 17601 Connie Buckwalter Director of Marketing (717) 390-4126 www.woodcrestvilla.org

1901 North Fifth Street Harrisburg, PA 17102-1598 Barry S. Ramper II, N.H.A. President/CEO (717) 221-7902 www.homelandcenter.org

2499 Zerbe Road Narvon, PA 17555 Lynne Bickta Director of Independent Living (717) 445-8741 lbickta@zerberetirementcommunity.com www.zerberetirementcommunity.com

If you would like your CCRC/Life Plan Community to be featured on this page, please contact your marketing consultant or call (717) 285-1350.

The CCRCs listed are sponsoring this message. This is not an all-inclusive list.

Study: Chronic Kidney Disease Linked to Increased Fall Risk People with chronic kidney disease are more likely to fall and suffer serious injuries because the ailment causes the body to significantly weaken, say researchers at Indiana’s Ball State University.

Brandon Kistler, a Ball State nutrition professor, led a multi-university research team that conducted an analysis of almost 158,000 adults — about 6 percent with CKD — age 65 or older, surveyed in the 2014 Behavioral Risk Factor Surveillance System by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.

“Falls and Fall-Related Injuries Among U.S. Adults Aged 65 or Older with Chronic Kidney Disease,” which was recently posted by the CDC, found that people with CKD were at increased risk of falls and fall-related injuries even after adjusting for differences in demographic characteristics, health conditions, and lifestyle factors.

“Numerous physiological changes associated with CKD, such as muscle wasting and weakness, may explain the increased risk of falling,” said

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February 2019

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Kistler, who conducted the research project with Jagdish Khubchandani, a health science professor, along with faculty at the University of Illinois.

“Furthermore, changes in bone and mineral metabolism causing weak, brittle bones may lead to an increased propensity for fall-related injuries in people with CKD, especially those with end-stage kidney disease,” Kistler said.

The study also found that among people with CKD, women and people diagnosed with diabetes or arthritis were more likely to fall and be injured.

Khubchandani believes people with CKD can significantly reduce spills by incorporating exercise in their daily routines.

“Physical function and exercise are potentially modifiable, cost-effective, and evidence-based strategies to enhance mobility. Our study suggests that as in other populations, exercise programs that target strength and balance may be an effective strategy for preventing falls and fall-related injuries among people with CKD, but prospective trials are needed.” www.50plusLifePA.com

Tinseltown Talks

Living with Rodney Dangerfield Nick Thomas

The Christmas season may be over, but last December periods of recovery with Joan by his side throughout. held special significance for Joan Dangerfield, who married “He joked that, at his age, all the phone numbers comedian Rodney Dangerfield 25 years ago on Dec. 26. in his little black book were doctors,” she said. “It was The pair had dated for 10 years following a chance certainly true and brought out my nurturing side. I did meeting in 1983 when Dangerfield strolled passed Joan’s everything I could to comfort him.”

Santa Monica flower shop.

Dangerfield died in 2004, aged 82, and Joan has “Being a diehard fan, I recognized Rodney immediately,” since worked to keep her husband’s memory alive.

Joan recalled from her West Hollywood home.

His website (rodney.com) has been revamped, and the “I was 16 when I first saw him on The Tonight Show, and Rodney Dangerfield Institute for the Study of Comedy suddenly there he was, 14 years later, walking towards me, is now housed at Los Angeles City College and offers the funniest man in the world. classes including standup, improvisational comedy, and “For me, it was love at first sight, the holy grail of joke writing. encounters. He was fascinating and had those soulful, azure“Rodney’s social media presence is building, and it’s blue eyes, the color of the sky on a clear day. I couldn’t look fun to see the reaction from his loyal fans as well as new at him without smiling.” ones,” she says. “I am also very excited that Paradigm The bug-eyed, tie-fidgeting comedian who cracked up Talent Agency is currently fielding offers for a biopic or Photo provided by Aaron Stipkovich at Stipko.com. audiences for decades with his often self-deprecating, “no documentary film about Rodney’s remarkable life. I am Rodney and Joan Dangerfield. respect” style of rapid-fire one-liners began dropping by each sure that will deepen his impression on the world.” morning to watch Joan arrange flowers.

Nick Thomas teaches at Auburn University at Montgomery, Despite their clearly different backgrounds — Joan was raised in a Utah Ala., and has written features, columns, and interviews for over 700 magazines and Mormon family — the two hit it off immediately. newspapers.

“I felt like the luckiest person in the world,” she said. “To have your own personal comedian constantly surprising you, I couldn’t wait to wake up each advertisement day.”

Joan remembers Dangerfield working hard at his craft, writing his own standup material and often taking months to perfect a joke. He would dash off to local comedy clubs in the evenings, sometimes two or three a night, to try out a new joke and experiment with its delivery and placement within a routine.

If you want a funeral with an expensive casket Although Dangerfield experienced an unhappy childhood, Joan says he used and embalming, go to a funeral home! humor to tackle depression.

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RSVP is looking for volunteer drivers for SpiriTrust Lutheran’s Touch-a-Life Program. Volunteers support those who need to be driven to appointments and various places in the York and Hanover areas.

RSVP also needs volunteers who enjoy working with children to help in Leg Up Farm’s therapeutic riding department.

Volunteer benefits include: transportation reimbursement, free supplemental liability insurance, recognition and appreciation events, assistance with clearances, and potential Volunteer of the Month recognition in the York County edition of 50plus LIFE. RSVP of the Capital Region is a member of Senior Corps of Pennsylvania and is supported by the Corporation for National and Community Service.

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Code YSN

February 2019

9

Older But Not Wiser

Does This Heart Monitor Make Me Look Fat? Sy Rosen

I now have a cardiologist. Saying I have a cardiologist makes my heart race and makes me want to go see my cardiologist.

Without going into too much detail, my regular doctor heard an irregular heartbeat and sent me to a specialist, who had a heart monitor attached to my chest.

When I got home the first question I asked my wife was, “Does this heart monitor make me look fat?” She assured me it wasn’t the heart monitor that was causing this impression.

I don’t know if any of you have ever worn a heart monitor, but it’s very annoying.

It’s tough to sleep with it on. And if I did fall asleep, it would sometimes beep in the middle of the night, saying I needed to change batteries. Why was it always in the middle of the night?

This machine was insidious. And it was very painful every time I had to remove the stickers attached to my chest, tearing away whatever little hair I had left.

But if you’re wearing a heart monitor, the one thing you really don’t want is a call from the cardiologist’s secretary saying he needs to see you first thing in the morning.

“My appointment isn’t for two weeks. What’s wrong?” I asked.

“The doctor wants to talk to you personally,” she replied.

“OK, but let me ask you one question, am I dying?”

The secretary chuckled and said, “I really don’t think so.”

“I really don’t like the word think,” I replied.

That night I was very worried and started listing all the things I still Locally RN Owned & wanted to do with my life (besides

not dying). Right now, a big night on the town is going to the movies with my wife, Wanda.

Anyway, here’s what I came up with: 1. I want to make 30 new friends — not Facebook friends, real friends I can count on to come to my funeral.

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2. I want to run for political office. If you think I’m too old, look at some of the politicians in Washington.

3. I want to go snowboarding, cliff diving, skateboarding, skydiving, and, of course, play a heated game of dodgeball (because I loved it in elementary school).

4. I want to go to plays, and concerts, and art galleries, and the opera (OK, forget the opera).

5. I want to be on the Supreme Court (I may have to go to law school).

6. I want to spend a week rhyming everything I say. Although it may annoy, for some reason it brings me great joy. It makes me elated, as previously stated.

7. W anda and I should spend a year living in France. And wear no underpants.

OK, I’ve got to stop rhyming.

8. I want to find a cure for a disease. Hopefully the disease I am suffering from.

9. I want to do something completely frivolous, like buying a $4,000 bottle of wine, drinking it, and pretending I like it. Make it a $200 bottle of wine — I may be dying, but I’m not crazy.

The next day I got to the doctor’s office an hour early, and as soon as I saw him, I blurted out, “Am I dying?!”

“Not today,” he chuckled.

“Tomorrow?” I chuckled back. Yeah, there was way too much chuckling going on.

The doctor explained that my heart rate was a little fast, and while I had the monitor on he just wanted to prescribe some medication to see how I reacted.

“If it were serious, I would have talked to you directly on the phone.”

“So not talking to me directly was a good thing?” I asked.

“Absolutely.”

“Well, I hope you never talk to me directly again,” I said.

And of course we both chuckled.

I left the doctor’s office ecstatic and knew I had to do something to celebrate.

I thought of all the things I wrote on my list and decided that tonight Wanda and I were going to the movies.

Sy Rosen has written for many TV shows, including The Bob Newhart Show, Taxi, M.A.S.H., Maude, The Jeffersons, Rhoda, Frasier, Northern Exposure, and The Wonder Years. He now spends much of his time telling jokes to his grandkids and trying to convince his wife that he’s funny.

(717) 993-2263

www.50plusLifePA.com

The Beauty in Nature

Woodchucks and Gray Squirrels Clyde McMillan-Gamber

Woodchucks and are camouflaged. gray squirrels are Chucks are brown common, daytime to blend in with rodents in farmland soil, and the in southeastern squirrels are gray Pennsylvania. like the tree trunks Chucks inhabit they circle to some hay fields, escape enemies. while the grays live Certain kinds in woods, parks, of mammals live and older suburban and give birth in areas with their abandoned chuck many tall trees. holes, including And both these foxes, skunks, Woodchuck mammals live opossums, mink, among the trees, and other species. I shrubbery, and have seen red foxes weeds of hedgerows and mink using between fields and deserted chuck along woodland holes as nurseries. edges in cropland.

Chucks and Chucks dig deep, gray squirrels insulating burrows prepare for winter in the ground, in different ways. where each one Chucks put on lives alone, except layers of fat in fall mothers with their and sleep down in dependent young. their burrows in Gray squirrels winter.

Gray squirrel either dwell in tree Squirrels stash cavities or make nuts and seeds in nests of dead twigs tree hollows or and leaves among twigs in tall trees. bury them in the ground. Squirrels are Again, each creature lives alone, active all winter, finding the food they except mothers and their offspring. stored.

Obviously, chucks and squirrels can Woodchucks and gray squirrels live in the same habitats without mate in February. Male chucks do competition for shelters. emerge from their dens during that Woodchucks mostly eat grass, month. Each female chuck has one clover, and other green plants. Gray litter of about four young. squirrels, however, feast on nuts and Gray squirrels, however, breed a seeds for the most part. These rodents second time and have about four don’t compete for food, either. young in each litter.

Both these handsome, interesting Try to enjoy the adaptable and mammals are part of food chains in prolific woodchucks and gray squirrels. their shared habitats. Several predators They are interesting and entertaining prey on some of them, including around farmland woodlots and coyotes, red foxes, bald eagles, and hedgerows, and elsewhere. red-tailed hawks. Young chucks are There, both species have shelters caught and consumed more often than and food without competing with adults are. each other for them. And like many However, chucks and squirrels other creatures, they help bring a bit of have dens to retreat into, and they the wild close to home. www.50plusLifePA.com

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February 2019

11

Writing to Preserve and Revive Memory

By Beth N. Carvin If you’re old enough to remember the John F. Kennedy assassination or the Cuban missile crisis, you’re probably realizing that your memory isn’t what it used to be.

Indeed, the Centers for Disease Control has reported that 1 in 8 Americans over the age of 60 complains of worsening memory loss. The problem may be related to a medical condition, emotional problems, cognitive impairment, or simply the indignities of aging, but it’s distressing regardless of the cause.

As it turns out, one way to preserve and in some cases even enhance memory is to proactively revisit your past. One form is a technique called reminiscence therapy, which is widely used in applications ranging from mental health interventions to memory care in nursing homes.

But simply committing your life experiences to paper (virtual or otherwise) can be helpful and even therapeutic.

Research also shows the health benefits of writing. Over a decade ago, the American Psychological Association published a study indicating that expressive writing reduces “intrusive and avoidant thoughts about negative events and improves working memory.”

Researchers concluded that these improvements help individuals cope more effectively with stress, because they have freed up cognitive resources.

More recently, in discussing the use of writing in education, neurologist Judy Willis, M.D., noted that writing can “enhance the brain’s intake, processing, The April issue of 50plus LIFE will include a special focus on foot health in recognition of

National Foot Health Awareness Month.

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Contact your account representative today, call (717) 285-1350, or email info@onlinepub.com

February 2019

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1: Choose a writing aid.

Today’s technology offers a variety of writing platforms to help you organize your thoughts and store them in one place.

There are personal blogs, journaling applications, memoir-writing software, and reminiscing platforms that offer predefined topics to help trigger memories.

Many of these solutions are free and can give you the structure you need to both simplify and encourage the process.

2: Use prompts.

When people sit down to write for the first time, they often don’t know where to begin.

A prompt like, “Who was your childhood best friend?” or “What was the first pet you owned?” can provide direction as well as get the memory juices flowing. The same thing can be accomplished by using prompts like objects or photos.

3: Don’t worry about chronology.

Recording your memories doesn’t always have to follow a chronological order. Sometimes attempting to follow a timeline can prevent you from writing about what you’re feeling or affect what you’re inspired to share.

Maybe it’s your first car or your first kiss. Your favorite pets or favorite trips.

Family holidays or family problems. Write what you want, when you want, and break it up into pieces to avoid feeling overwhelmed by the size of the project.

4: Find your writing sweet spot.

Some people write better after their first cup of coffee. Others are more productive midday or at night. Start by recognizing what works best for you.

Ask yourself when your words seem to flow best. Is it as soon as a memory pops into your head? Is it when you wake up each morning, or before you go to sleep each night? Try different approaches until you find the one that clicks.

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retaining, and retrieving of information … it promotes the brain’s attentive focus … boosts longterm memory, illuminates patterns, gives the brain time for reflection, and when well guided, is a source of conceptual development and stimulus of the brain’s highest cognition.”

In other words, writing can transform an individual’s brain and memory.

Whether you or someone you know is impacted by a memory deficit, or you are simply looking for a way to tell your own story for yourself and your family, here are five simple strategies for preserving and sharing your memories in writing.

5: Invite others to contribute.

Several years ago, my family began reminiscing via a group email.

We wrote about an old bar in Boston that my grandfather owned, which prompted an engrossing series of stories from my dad and uncles about the barmaids, the keys to the liquor cabinet, and some incidents involving local law enforcement that many of us had never heard.

The more we wrote, the more everyone wanted to share and chime in, and the more we learned.

This kind of collaboration, made easy by today’s online environment, helps unearth details you may not remember or may not have known. With or without memory loss, it enriches the experience of taking a trip down memory lane.

Beth N. Carvin is CEO and co-founder of JamBios (jambios.com), a collaborative writing application and social platform for reminiscing, sharing, and preserving memories.

www.50plusLifePA.com

Fresh Fare

Fight the Cold with Better-for-You Comfort Foods Few things go together quite like cold weather and comfort foods.

However, those hearty dishes that are typically craved on blustery days are usually not classified as “healthy.”

With the right approach, though, you can put a better-for-you twist on some of your favorite dishes that can keep you cozy and satiated during the winter season.

For example, you can put a grownup twist on grilled cheese and tomato soup with this recipe for Creamy Tomato and Roasted Pepper Soup with Cheddar Cracker Melts.

Pairing flavorful, seasonal dishes, such as soups and stews, with a wholesome snack cracker like glutenfree, non-GMO Crunchmaster Tuscan Peasant Crackers can help satisfy those comfort-food cravings while also contributing to a healthy lifestyle.

For other seasonal recipes, coupons, tips and nutritional information, visit

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Creamy Tomato and Roasted Pepper Soup with Cheddar Cracker Melts Prep time: 15 minutes Cook time: 25 minutes Servings: 6 Creamy Tomato and Roasted Pepper Soup: • 2 tablespoons olive oil • 1 onion, chopped • 1 carrot, chopped • 3 cloves garlic, chopped • 1 teaspoon salt, divided • 1/2 teaspoon pepper

• 1/2 teaspoon paprika • 1 pinch chili flakes • 4 cups organic no-salt-added vegetable broth • 1 can (28 ounces) no-saltadded diced tomatoes • 1 cup chopped prepared roasted red peppers • 2 bay leaves • 1/3 cup 35 percent heavy cream • 2 tablespoons finely chopped fresh chives, divided • 1 teaspoon cider vinegar Cheddar Cracker Melts: • 24 Crunchmaster Tuscan Peasant

Fire-Roasted Tomato Basil Crackers • 3/4 cup shredded cheddar cheese In a Dutch oven or large saucepan over medium heat, heat oil. Cook onion, carrot, garlic, 1/2 teaspoon salt, pepper, paprika, and chili flakes about 5 minutes, or until vegetables are slightly softened.

Stir in broth, tomatoes, roasted red peppers, and bay leaves; bring to boil.

Reduce heat to medium-low. Simmer 15-20 minutes, or until vegetables are tender. Discard bay leaves. Let cool slightly.

Transfer to blender; puree in batches until smooth. Stir in cream, remaining salt, 1 tablespoon chives, and vinegar.

To make Cheddar Cracker Melts: Heat broiler to high and position rack in center of oven. Arrange crackers on please see COMFORT FOODS page 20

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February 2019

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— Tours and Trips — How to Get Started Traveling Post-Retirement

By Joan K. Lacy Maybe you’re one of those people who worked hard all your life and didn’t take — or have! — the time to travel and see this wonderful world of ours.

And now, in retirement, you find yourself with lots of time and itching to travel, but you don’t know where to get started.

The good news is that travel is so easy today.

There are many, many options available now to suit whatever you envision for your next travel experience.

Whether you enjoy wine tasting or want to try bungee jumping, those options are available to you.

You can choose anything from local events to aroundthe-world cruises. You might want to experience whitewater rafting, hiking, spelunking — if you like exploring underground.

There is a world of adventure just waiting for you!

My early interest in travel and languages led me to take an opportunity to live and study in Europe for a year — best year ever! I loved meeting people in other countries and learning at least a few words of their languages.

I’m older now, and the love of traveling around our own United States and revisiting locations, friends, and acquaintances, both here and abroad, still holds its charm for me.

If you haven’t had the chance to experience the fun of travel until now, a whole new world of experiences is waiting for you! Here are five easy tips to keep in mind if you are a new traveler: 1. Take advantage of your scheduling flexibility and travel during nonpeak

periods. Costs are usually less for everything from flights and accommodations, to entrance fees and attractions. And, there are fewer crowds.

2. Use any discounts you qualify for. One of the perks of being a senior citizen is the wide range of travel discounts that are now available to you.

3. Go for longer visits.

Spend more time at your destination. Plan to see just one city, or one country, and experience it thoroughly. That’s the best way to soak in the local flavor.

4. Let someone else do the booking. Many travelers appreciate someone else making the arrangements, and group travel provides security for solo travelers or those not confident in planning all the details on their own. Group travel eliminates worries about finding transportation, missing an important site, or not speaking the language.

5. Day tours are your friend! If you prefer to go it alone and have any concerns about getting around or being able to visit popular sites, look for day tours with reliable companies, especially those offering frontof-the-line access or other methods for avoiding the crowds.

Seek out new experiences. Wherever you go, you will make new friends and create a storehouse of happy memories.

Travel and living abroad, coupled with Joan Lacy’s interests in archaeology, science, myths, and legends, inspired her to write the novel A Shadow Away, the first book in the Alex Cort Adventures series. For more information, visit joanklacy.com.

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www.50plusLifePA.com

— Tours and Trips — Top Considerations for Retirees Purchasing Travel Insurance There are several key points retirees should consider in regard to travel insurance before they hit the road in the coming year.

“While travel can be complicated at any age, retirees are faced with additional considerations, especially when it comes to medical coverage,” said Stan Sandberg, co-founder of TravelInsurance.com.

“There are not only ways to save on your next travel insurance policy, but also things to keep in mind to ensure you are taken care of under unforeseen circumstances.”

Here are five things retirees should consider when purchasing travel insurance: Medicare doesn’t provide coverage outside the United States. Healthcare received outside the U.S. is generally not covered under standard Medicare plans.

Travel insurance can provide emergency travel medical coverage with limits that can reach $250,000 per person or more.

For extreme situations where an overseas hospital can’t handle the emergency, most travel insurance plans offer emergency evacuation coverage with limits up to $1 million per person.

Retirees planning to travel overseas multiple times a year should consider purchasing Medicare supplement insurance or a Medigap plan.

However, since Medigap plans can have deductibles, lifetime coverage limits up to $50,000, and limits on the length of trip, most retiree travelers may find single-trip travel insurance a better option.

Purchase travel insurance early to qualify for a preexisting condition waiver. Most travel insurance plans will exclude coverage for losses that stem from a preexisting condition.

However, many plans offer a preexisting condition exclusion waiver (meaning preexisting conditions will be covered).

To qualify, one must meet certain requirements, the most important being to purchase the travel insurance plan within a strict time window — usually 7-21 days — from when the initial payment was made.

Also, travelers typically need to insure 100 percent of their prepaid and nonrefundable trip costs.

For travelers with preexisting conditions, this is one of the most important considerations in purchasing a plan, as prior injuries, illnesses, diseases, or other types of medical conditions in which any treatment or care was sought in the six- to 12-month period prior to the policy-effective date all fall into this category. www.50plusLifePA.com

If you’re traveling with a group, you can save money with group travel plans. Some group travel plans do not factor in traveler ages when pricing the cost of travel insurance, which can make plans more affordable to older travelers.

Typically, to qualify for this coverage, the group must include at least 10 individuals all traveling on the same itinerary on similar dates.

Group plans are also designed for easy administration by a group leader who can manage sign-ups and changes on behalf of each individual.

Travelers should speak to a licensed agent to see if they qualify for a preexisting condition waiver or read full coverage details prior to buying.

Trip cancellation provides greater flexibility for those who need it. Unlike Medigap coverage, travel insurance can offer trip cancellation and interruption coverage.

This coverage can cover the reimbursement of trip please see INSURANCE page 16

ESCORTED MOTORCOACH TRIPS February

20 Tony award Best Musical 2018 – “The Bands Visit” $140pp

March

4,5,6,7,8 Philadelphia Flower Show $89pp 23 Springtime in NYC $65pp 25 Hunterdon Hills – “Take Me Away” $115pp 28 Dutch Apple – “Joseph and the Amazing Technicolored Dreamcoat” $89pp 31–Apr. 2 Foxwoods Casino $299pp Dble $399pp Sngle

April

Museum of the Bible $65pp Washington DC Cherry Blossom Festival $55pp The Odyssey & Arlington Cemetery $135pp Saints & Sinners of the Great Smokey Mountains $1999pp Dble $2599pp Sngle 26 Two New Gardens and a Native Plant Haven $149pp 27 Alexandria Home and Garden Tour and George Washington’s Mt. Vernon $169pp 3 13 16 21-26

May

2 Chanticleer in Spring and Lancaster County Greenhouses $99pp 6 Mansions of Fairmont Park $135pp 9 Flight 93, Fallingwater & Kentuck Knob $131pp 13-18 Charleston & Savannah $999pp Dble $1299pp Sngle 21 Blue Angels Experience $115pp

June

15 Cape May a Day on Own $75pp 23-30 Great Gardens of the Midwest $1999pp Dble $2699pp Sngle 29 Annapolis – A Day On Own $65pp

July

13 Fingerlakes Wine Fest $99pp 20 NYC a Day on Own $40pp 26-28 Garden Walk Buffalo’s 25th Anniversary $539pp Dble

August 10 22

Ocean City MD a Day on Own $75pp Dutch Apple – “Finding Neverland” $89pp

September 3-6

15-19

Maine Coastal Escape $699pp Dble $899pp Sngle Horses and History – Louisville, KY $ 850pp Dble $1160pp Sngle

October 17 22

Fall Foliage in the Poconos $149pp Fall in Bucks County $179pp

November 28

Macy’s Day Parade – NYC $ 75pp

December 2-8

Blue Christmas – Elvis in Memphis $1299pp Dble $1799pp Sngle

Book online at www.lowees.com Call or email ckelly@lowees.com to register

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— Tours and Trips — 5 Tips to Keep in Mind before Booking Your Next Cruise

By Matthew Phillips Baby boomers make up a large portion of American cruisers; in fact, 30 percent of boomers indicate one or more of their international trips will be via a cruise ship, according to the 2019 Boomer Travel Trends report by AARP. This audience is looking for a variety of options, from river cruises through Europe to more traditional ships for family vacations and multigenerational travel.

Although planning your cruise may seem daunting, here are five tips to keep in mind before booking your next cruise, whether it’s with the entire family, a solo adventure, or your first time taking a cruise vacation.

1. Determine your cruise personality: Before planning any trip, I ask myself, “What am I looking to experience?” This question helps me to decide whether I want to travel through an Alaskan glacier or relax in a beach villa.

I always like to remind people who are thinking of cruising that there are now so many types of cruises. In addition to the large mega-ships that offer a plethora of options, there are smaller ships that go where the big ships cannot, both in the U.S. as well as the Caribbean and overseas, which provide incredible experiences.

Also, consider whether you want the abundance of options that the large ships offer or if you prefer a smaller, more intimate sailing experience. I encourage people to then think about their personal needs and wants to determine their cruise personality.

2. Decide where to set sail: For those looking for a warmer climate to escape the winter, my vote is for a cruise that stops at Grand Cayman Island, but there are plenty of nontraditional options as well.

If you’re looking to dive into history and explore different cultures overseas, I suggest river cruises in Europe or Asia. On cruises through Italy, guests will visit popular sites in Rome, such as the Colosseum; float through Venice; and experience several other famous Italian cities.

For any nature lover or adventure seeker, Alaska is the perfect destination and a popular option from May through September. On your way, you’ll be surrounded by whales; then, off the boat, you can break out your hiking boots and explore the glaciers.

3. Take advantage of savings: When booking your cruise, make sure to take advantage of all the cruise sales and savings available to you. From January through March, many cruise providers are offering limited-time deals, as this is a popular season for consumers to book cruises.

Many cruise lines offer onboard credits to be used for extras, such as shore excursions, spa visits, and bar service. Anywhere you can save in the planning process gives you extra pocket change for excursions and souvenirs!

4. Tips for first-time cruisers: I suggest finding a trusted travel agent, especially if it’s your first cruise experience, as this can save you from some major headaches.

Travel agents are full of knowledge and can help you navigate your best options for not only getting to and from your destination, but also for getting value by suggesting itinerary ideas that you may never have considered on your own.

5. For packing, start with the essentials: Sometimes the simplest items are the ones overlooked, such as a pen and paper or cash. I also find making lists incredibly useful to avoid forgetting essentials.

If possible, think through the clothing you’ll need during the day and evenings so you don’t overpack. Most standard cruise cabins don’t offer an abundance of storage space, and you’ll want to leave room in your luggage for anything purchased on shore excursions.

Once I have the essentials, I consider any helpful gadgets or apps. On trips to foreign countries, I find Google Translate to be my best friend. I highly suggest downloading it prior to your trip to be able to effortlessly navigate language barriers.

Other travel essentials for your cruise include sunglasses, travel-size toiletries, and insurance plans.

Following these tips will help simplify the planning process for your next cruise vacation and put your mind at ease so that, once on board, all you have to do is sit back, relax, and enjoy yourself. Happy sailing!

Matthew Phillips is the director of travel for AARP Services, Inc. AARP Member Benefits is a resource for AARP Members but is free for anyone to check out, with a variety of savings across many categories, including travel. Visit AARPBenefits.com for more information.

INSURANCE from page 15 costs due to a range of unexpected circumstances, from last-minute illnesses to severe weather and natural disasters.

For the most flexibility, travelers may consider purchasing a plan with a “cancel for any reason” (CFAR) upgrade, which provides reimbursement for up to 75 percent of the total trip costs for a cancellation for any reason, as long as the cancellation occurs more than 48 hours prior to the trip departure date.

This benefit is usually only available if the policy is purchased within seven to 21 days of the initial trip payment and 100 percent of prepaid and nonrefundable trip costs are insured.

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You can buy travel insurance for your activities, too. Just because travelers are retired doesn’t mean they aren’t adventurous.

For the active or adventure traveler, check out plans that offer hazardous or adventure sports coverage, which provide coverage for higher-risk activities, such as heli-skiing, off-trail snowboarding, bungee jumping, rock climbing, or SCUBA diving below a certain depth.

If travel entails any of those activities, travelers will need travel insurance plans that offer coverage for those specific activities.

For more information, visit TravelInsurance.com.

www.50plusLifePA.com

Soldier Stories

Robert Naeye

Vietnam Medevac Pilot Faces His Toughest Challenge

John Travers was once a larger-than-life “John had a reputation as an excellent Dustoff pilot. character. This Vietnam War hero was a star He was very competent and fearless. Like all of us, he basketball player, prolific prankster, and an would accept any mission and would do whatever was outgoing husband and father who was admired necessary to help the wounded soldiers on the ground.” by almost everybody who came in contact with “You’re talking about a real, true American hero,” him. adds retired Sgt. Joseph Novak Sr., president of Yet today, this Harrisburg native is living in Vietnam Veterans Association Chapter 542, to which a California healthcare facility due to exposure Travers belongs. to Agent Orange, a defoliant widely deployed Travers’s exemplary service did not end when he

by American aircraft during the war. This toxic returned to Harrisburg. During 1972’s Hurricane chemical has caused physical ailments and brain Agnes, Travers was based at Fort Indiantown Gap damage that limit his activities, speech, and while serving in the National Guard. He flew quality of life. helicopter missions to rescue people from their roofs.

Travers’s story is one of resilience and hope During one mission, he flew his chopper under a Photo credit: Anwar Saeed Photo credit: Calvin Ligh in the face of daunting odds. And it’s a story bridge to save people trapped in the Susquehanna John Travers holding a After more than powerfully documented in the new film All River. photo of a challenge coin 30 years, Kathleen Were Forgotten and Then Came John.

Travers returned to Penn State. This time, he earned created in his honor.

Torchia and John Travers was born in Harrisburg in 1948. a master’s degree in European history, graduating Travers reconnected at His father, John Sr., was a B-17 bomber a high school reunion summa cum laude. pilot in World War II. “Big John,” as he was Travers had married and had a daughter before committee meeting. known to family and friends, later became a going off to war, but he received a “Dear John” letter They married in 2005. highly regarded sports writer and editor for while serving in Vietnam. He remarried and had Harrisburg’s two major daily newspapers: The another daughter after his return, but this marriage did Patriot-News and The Evening News. not last, although he still maintains a very close relationship with his daughter.

Big John’s love of sports filtered down to his son. The father recommended Then, in 2002, Travers attended a high school reunion committee meeting. that John Jr. focus all of his energy and attention on one sport. Travers decided It was there that he laid eyes on Kathleen Torchia for the first time since 1966. on basketball. He chose well, leading an undersized Bishop McDevitt High She had returned to Harrisburg from California to stay with her father, who School squad to the Pennsylvania state championship game in 1966, his senior was living alone. year.

“I walked in the door and there was John Travers,” she recalls.

During his high school years, he befriended his fellow student Kathleen They talked for two hours. Torchia found him very interesting and Torchia. Travers would frequently walk her home from school. They went to intelligent and a man with strong moral values. The two became best friends. the senior prom together but lost touch after high school and would not see Travers asked Torchia if she would consider dating him, but she was turned each other for 36 years. off by the smoking and drinking he used to cope with his war memories.

“I had a huge crush on him; a lot of girls did,” recalls Torchia.

Eventually, he agreed to refrain from smoking and drinking in her presence.

Penn State and Notre Dame offered Travers an athletic scholarship. He After an 18-month courtship, they married in September 2005. chose to stay close to home. His parents had raised him as a strict Catholic and “We were so happy. We were best friends and we had a beautiful, beautiful did not allow him to date in high school. That all changed when he got to State marriage, and I just couldn’t have been happier,” says Torchia.

College.

During this period, Travers was deeply active in veterans’ affairs. He “They turned me loose on a campus with 20,000 females and all this alcohol helped breathe new life into the struggling Harrisburg chapter of the Vietnam and then expect that I was going to have some kind of bodily control,” Travers Veterans Association, tripling its membership and expanding its activities while said years ago. serving as president.

Travers neglected his classes and became academically ineligible after his “John Travers got the Vietnam vets in south-central Pennsylvania organized; freshman year. He and Penn State agreed to part ways. Shortly thereafter, he got them out of their shells. He got them to take pride in the service they Travers received a draft notice in the mail. had provided to the country. And he gave them a unified voice,” says former “I said to myself, ‘I’m not going to get drafted,’” he recalled. After speaking Harrisburg mayor Stephen R. Reed. to an Army recruiter, he signed up to be an Army helicopter pilot.

Travers also lobbied the Army and Congress on behalf of the hundreds of Travers became a Dustoff pilot, flying medevac missions into active combat Dustoff crews who served valiantly in Vietnam but who were never awarded zones. Travers’s chopper frequently took hits from enemy fire. But he flew these their own Combat Medical Badge. Inexplicably, this campaign has yet to bear incredibly dangerous missions 10 hours a day, six days a week. fruit.

He estimates that he evacuated more than 2,100 patients during the war.

Just six months after their wedding, Torchia started noticing that her Time was of the essence because 99 percent of wounded Americans who husband was behaving abnormally. Travers was at first reluctant to visit a survived the first 24 hours after their injuries would live. doctor, but finally he received a diagnosis of a rare form of lymphoma — the One of Travers’s fellow Dustoff pilots, Bernie Goldensweig, said of him, please see PILOT page 18 www.50plusLifePA.com

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17

York County

Calendar of Events

Community Programs/Support Groups Free and open to the public

Senior Center Activities

Feb. 1, 10:30 a.m.

Partners in Thyme Herb Club of Southern York County Glenview Alliance Church 10037 Susquehanna Trail, Glen Rock (717) 428-2210

Feb. 5, 7 p.m.

Surviving Spouse Socials of York County Faith United Church of Christ 509 Pacific Ave., York (717) 266-2784

Crispus Attucks Active Living Center (717) 848-3610, www.crispusattucks.org

Feb. 4, 9:30 a.m.

Green Thumb Garden Club Meeting Emmanuel Lutheran Church 2650 Freysville Road, Red Lion (717) 235-2823

Feb. 19, 7-8 p.m.

Alzheimer’s Support Group Providence Place 3377 Fox Run Road, Dover (717) 767-4500

Parks and Recreation Feb. 2, 9 a.m. to 4 p.m.; Feb. 3, noon to 4 p.m. – Mammal and Fur Skulls Drop-in, Nixon Park Feb. 15 and 16, 8:30 a.m. to 4:30 p.m.; Feb. 17, noon to 4:30 p.m. – Great Backyard Bird Count Drop-in, Nixon Park

result of exposure to Agent Orange in Vietnam.

“He had already seen so many of his comrades die from various cancers caused by Agent Orange.

He thought now it was his turn. It was horrible,” says Torchia.

And this was just the start of Travers’s medical ordeals. His treatments for lymphoma were successful and have kept him alive to the present day.

But around the same time, his speech began to slur, and then he had trouble walking. A neurologist diagnosed him with a form of brain degeneration, also triggered by Agent Orange. The brain damage would eventually affect his speech, emotions, and impulse control.

Travers was bedridden for two years and was prone to outbursts of screaming.

“The PTSD was just raging at this point,” recalls Torchia, referring to post-traumatic stress disorder.

Travers spent time in a Veterans Administration hospital in California, but his conditioned worsened due to neglect. His situation started to improve after Torchia transferred him to another hospital, where he received more attention and medication.

Torchia later took him to the Brain Treatment Center in Newport Beach, California. There, he received experimental stem cell and regenerative medicine treatments. Miraculously, Travers’s physical and mental condition has improved dramatically in the past few years thanks to these treatments.

During these 12 years of ordeal and anguish, Torchia has patiently stood by her husband, constantly searching for the best possible care.

“Many others would not have had the courage, the stamina, the persistence, the devotion, the love to do such things. But Kathy has,” says Reed. “Frankly, John Travers would probably not be around today if Kathleen had not stayed by his side.”

In a recent email, Torchia wrote, “John is currently the best he has been mentally, since the onset of his illness.”

She says he is present, sharp, and able to carry on conversations despite impaired speech. She describes his demeanor and attitude as “pleasant,” and says he smiles and laughs more.

These medications and treatments have given Travers and Torchia new hope.

“John is a fighter!” Torchia says. “He has physical therapy three times a week, and he hopes and prays that he will walk again one day. I continue to encourage him in his hope of coming home and being a husband again.”

To learn more about Travers’s inspiring story and the documentary film All Were Forgotten and Then Came John, visit katalinafilmworks.com.

Robert Naeye is a freelance journalist living in Derry Township. He is the former editor-in-chief of Sky & Telescope magazine.

February 2019

Dillsburg Senior Activity Center – (717) 432-2216 Wednesdays, 9:30-10:30 a.m. – Diabetes Prevention Program/Group Eastern Area Senior Center, Inc. – (717) 252-1641 Golden Connections Community Center (717) 244-7229, www.gcccenter.com Weekdays, 9 a.m. – Games Tuesdays and Wednesdays, 10 a.m. – Pinochle Fridays, 9:15 a.m. – Computers 101 Golden Visions Senior Community Center (717) 633-5072, www.goldenvisionspa.com Heritage Senior Center, Inc. – (717) 292-7471 www.heritagesrcenter.org

PILOT from page 17

18

Delta Area Senior Center, Inc. – (717) 456-5753

50plus LIFE t

Northeastern Senior Community Center (717) 266-1400, www.mtwolf.org/SeniorCenter Red Land Senior Center – (717) 938-4649 www.redlandseniorcenter.org September House – (717) 848-4417 South Central Senior Community Center (717) 235-6060 http://southcentralyorkcountysrctr.webs.com Mondays, 9:30 a.m. – Acrylic Art Class Wednesdays, 10 a.m. – Line Dancing Fridays, 9 a.m. – Weights Class Stewartstown Senior Center – (717) 993-3488 www.stewsenior.org Susquehanna Senior Center – (717) 244-0340 www.susquehannaseniorcenter.org Mondays, 9:30-10:30 a.m. – Chorus Practice Tuesdays, 6-10 p.m. – Bluegrass/Country Music Jam Session White Rose Senior Center – (717) 843-9704 www.whiteroseseniorcenter.org Windy Hill On the Campus – (717) 225-0733 www.windyhillonthecampus.org Tuesdays, 1-2 p.m. – Beginner Ballroom Dancing Class Feb. 19, 12:30 p.m. – Monthly Book Club Yorktown Senior Center – (717) 854-0693 www.yorktownseniorcenter.org Submit senior center events to mjoyce@onlinepub.com.

www.50plusLifePA.com

Savvy Senior

Allowable Medical Expenses The list of allowable medical expenses, as defined by the IRS, is long and fairly flexible.

As a Medicare beneficiary, you can deduct your monthly premiums for Part B, Part C (Medicare Advantage plans), Part D drug plans, and any supplemental (Medigap) insurance you have.

If you have to pay a premium for Part A, that’s allowed too. You can also deduct the cost of all your deductibles, coinsurance, and copayments under Medicare.

In addition, you’re also allowed to deduct the cost of medical services not covered by Medicare, including dental treatment, vision care, prescription eyeglasses, hearing aids, and even long-term care.

They also allow transportation to and from medical treatment to count as an eligible medical expense. And if necessary, you may even be able to deduct home alterations and equipment — such as entrance ramps, grab bars, stair www.50plusLifePA.com

Send your senior questions to: Savvy Senior, P.O. Box 5443, Norman, OK 73070, or visit www.savvysenior.org. Jim Miller is a contributor to the NBC Today show and author of The Savvy Senior book.

Please join us for these FREE events!

April 30, 2019

20th Annual

Dear Dave, The short answer is yes, you can deduct your Medicare costs, but only if you meet certain conditions required by the IRS. Here’s how it works.

As a taxpayer, you’re allowed to deduct many medical and dental expenses as well as your Medicare out-of-pocket costs. But you can deduct only those expenses that exceed 7.5 percent of your 2018 adjusted gross income (AGI), and you’ll also need to itemize your deductions.

Next year (2019 tax season), the threshold will rise to 10 percent.

Here’s an example. Let’s say that your AGI in 2018 was $50,000. Of that, 7.5 percent is $3,750. If your total allowable medical expenses last year were $8,000, you’d be able to deduct $4,250 ($8,000 minus $3,750).

But, if your medical expenses were less than $3,750, you couldn’t claim any as a deduction.

You also need to understand that when taking a medical expense deduction, you don’t actually get back every dollar you claim.

While a tax credit reduces your taxes dollar-for-dollar, tax deductions simply reduce your taxable income, and your savings ultimately depend on the effective rate at which you’re taxed.

So, for example, if you qualify for a $4,250 deduction and your effective tax rate is 22 percent, you would get $935 in savings from that particular deduction.

To get this deduction you will need to file an itemized Schedule A (1040) tax return. You cannot claim medical expenses on Form 1040A or Form 1040EZ.

lifts, etc. — that can help you age in place.

Some things, however, you cannot deduct, such as vitamins and supplements, unless recommended by a physician to treat a specific medical condition.

You are also unable to deduct Medicare late penalties added to Part B or Part D premiums. Medicare beneficiaries who fail to sign up during their initial enrollment period are typically hit with a penalty that gets added to their monthly premiums, but these additional costs won’t count for tax purposes.

For more information, including a detailed rundown of allowable and unallowable medical expenses, see IRS Publication 502 Medical and Dental Expenses at irs.gov/pub/irs-pdf/p502.pdf or call the IRS at (800) 829-3676 and ask them to mail you a copy.

9 a.m. – 2 p.m.

LANCASTER COUNTY

Shady Maple Conference Center Smorgasbord Building 129 Toddy Drive, East Earl

May 28, 2019

20th Annual

Dear Savvy Senior, Can I deduct my Medicare premiums, deductibles, and copayments on my income taxes? I had a knee replacement surgery last year and spent quite a bit on medical care out of pocket and would like to know what I can write off.

– Frugal Dave

9 a.m. – 2 p.m.

Hershey Lodge 325 University Drive Hershey

DAUPHIN COUNTY

June 5, 2019

16th Annual

Jim Miller

Can You Deduct Medicare Costs on Your Income Taxes?

9 a.m. – 2 p.m.

CHESTER COUNTY

Church Farm School 1001 East Lincoln Highway Exton

Exhibitors • Health Screenings • Seminars • Demonstrations • Entertainment • Door Prizes Sponsor & Exhibitor Opportunities Available (717) 285-1350 (717) 770-0140 (610) 675-6240

www.50plusExpoPA.com 50plus LIFE t

February 2019

19

Tech Talk

Mark Rinaudo

Internet Not Working?

Here’s How to Troubleshoot

Question: What steps should I take to troubleshoot when my internet isn’t working before calling my internet service provider?

We’ve all been there. At the most inopportune time when you need your internet to be working, it’s either completely off or it’s cutting in and out.

Internet access is another utility almost as important as electricity.

If you’re without it, you’re stuck disconnected from the outside world. As more internet service providers are offering other products to piggyback on your internet access, such as phone service, these outages are causing more of a disconnect for their customers.

There are a few simple steps you can perform at home that may help bring your service back without having to call your internet service provider.

If you find that your computer or smartphone is not connecting to the internet, the first step is to look at your modem/router. If this device is not lit up, that can definitely indicate a problem on your end.

Power cycling the modem, which means unplugging its power and then plugging it back in after 30 seconds, is usually the first step given by internet service providers’ support staff.

Service interruptions are commonly caused by work being performed in the area, and a simple power cycle of your modem can restore the service. The modem would eventually perform a reset after a certain amount of time, but manually power cycling the modem speeds up the process and restores your service sooner.

If you find that your modem is lit up, everything looks like normal, and a power cycle does not fix the issue, then you may have a problem somewhere else on your system. If you only have a computer that’s using your internet service, then you may have an issue with the computer itself.

The first step I usually recommend to customers when something is acting

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February 2019

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awry on a computer is to reboot it.

The beauty of rebooting a computer is that it’s like starting over new and fresh, leaving behind whatever bugs have crept in and possibly caused the issue.

If after rebooting you still have no internet access, the next thing to check is whether you have connectivity to your modem. Your computer may be connected via wired connection or a wireless connection.

If your computer is connected via a wire, you can always trace from the modem back to your computer to ensure both ends of the cable are plugged in.

Sometimes hardware can lock up, and simply unplugging the cable and plugging it back in can reset the hardware. Find the place on your modem where the cable from your computer is plugged in. Unplug from there and then simply plug it back in.

Most modems have a set of status lights on the front that give a good indication of whether your service is up or if it’s experiencing an issue. If power cycling does not change the status lights on your modem, then it’s most likely an issue on your service provider’s end.

All service providers have a way for their customers to check if any outages are occurring on their network by visiting their website. This, however, does you no good when your internet is down.

But if you have a smartphone with a data plan, you can simply turn off your WiFi connection on your phone and then you’ll be able to use your carrier’s data network to visit your service provider’s website to see if they are indeed having trouble.

With a little troubleshooting, it’s quite possible that you can restore your internet service on your own when you need it the most.

Mark Rinaudo has worked in IT in Shreveport, La., for more than 20 years. He is the owner and operator of Preferred Data Solutions. Email mark@preferreddatasolutions. com to submit a question for this column.

COMFORT FOODS from page 13 parchment paper-lined baking sheet. Sprinkle with cheese. Broil 1-2 minutes, or until cheese is melted.

Divide soup among six bowls. Sprinkle with remaining chives and serve with Cheddar Cracker Melts.

Tip: Use mild, medium, or aged cheddar cheese. Smoked mozzarella can be substituted, if desired.

Nutrition information per serving: 250 calories; 15 g fat; 7 g saturated fat; 30 mg cholesterol; 730 mg sodium; 22 g carbohydrates; 2 g fiber; 11 g sugar; 6 g protein.

Family Features

www.50plusLifePA.com

It Was 50 Years Ago Today

‘Proud Mary’

   



    

Randal Hill

Creedence Clearwater Revival lead singer John Fogerty once recalled seeing a Will Rogers movie about old-time paddle-wheelers.

“I believe at one point they actually sing ‘Rolling on the river,’” Fogerty says. “I know that buried deep inside of me are all these little bits and pieces of Americana. It’s deep in my heart, deep in my soul. As I learned in English 101, write about what you know.”

which he scribbled song-title ideas.

“My first entry was ‘Proud Mary,’” he says. “I didn’t know what those two words meant, but I liked how they sounded together.”

Fogerty took his guitar and began playing a song introduction he had been working on, the chord riff based on the opening to Beethoven’s Fifth Symphony.

“I didn’t like how Beethoven had composed it. I preferred hitting the first ••• chord hard for emphasis, not the fourth Starting in the late 1960s, Fogerty’s … When I added rhythm to the chords, band brought images of rural America the song had the motion of a boat. I to the world with a unique musical style had always loved Mark Twain’s writing dubbed “swamp and the music of rock,” which Stephen Foster, so I featured Southern wrote lyrics about a country music, riverboat … gritty blues, and a “I finished heavy, danceable most of the song beat. in two hours.

CCR hailed Then I opened my from California, notebook for a song and none of its title. There was “Proud Mary” Creedence Clearwater Revival members had ever ‘Proud Mary.’”

February 1969 been to the South Not happy with before fame came the way the tune their way. The Bay Area quartet had sounded when his band recorded it, started as the Blue Velvets and then Fogerty stayed behind that day and became the Golliwogs before military overdubbed all the background vocal obligations caused a temporary breakup. parts himself after the other members When the band members came had left the studio. together again, they gleaned a new A longtime fan of black music, name from three sources: Creedence he sought a more authentic feel and from mutual pal Credence Newball, claimed to channel rhythm-and-blues Clearwater from a TV beer commercial icons Wilson Pickett and Howlin’ Wolf that promoted the brew as coming for the rerecording. It was Wolf’s bluesy “from the land of sky-blue waters,” influence that led Fogerty to pronounce and Revival for the band members’ turnin’ as toinin’ and burnin’ as boinin’.

••• commitment to their reformation.

The group’s debut album — “Proud Mary” — a Billboard No. 2 Creedence Clearwater Revival — chart hit — came from CCR’s second featured the minor swamp-rock hit album, Bayou Country, a million-seller “Susie-Q,” a tune first recorded by that fed the music-from-the-South Louisianan Dale Hawkins in 1957. rumor even more.

Music fans hailed CCR’s music as For Ike and Tina Turner, their a refreshing breakthrough, and many sizzling 1971 remake became a millionwere convinced — erroneously — that seller — and their biggest single ever. the band must have come from the Randal C. Hill is a rock ’n’ roll historian South, so authentic was their sound.

•••

Fogerty had a small notebook in www.50plusLifePA.com

who lives at the Oregon coast. He may be reached at wryterhill@msn.com.

 

        

     

Are You Reading?

Join the 2019 One Book, One Community campaign by reading Killers of the Flower Moon by David Grann.

40 libraries in Cumberland, Dauphin, Perry, York, and surrounding counties and their community partners present the regional reading campaign.

Attend free library programs and discussions throughout February and early spring!

Photo credit: Michael Lionstar

Visit www.oboc.org or your library to learn more

Stories of ordinary men and women called to perform extraordinary military service.

From 1999–2016, writer and World War II veteran Col. Robert D. Wilcox preserved the firsthand wartime experiences of more than 200 veterans through Salute to a Veteran, his monthly column featured in 50plus LIFE. Now, for the first time, 50 of those stories— selected by Wilcox himself—are available to own in this soft-cover book.

Simply complete and mail this form with your payment to the address below to order Salute to Our Veterans.

On-Line Publishers • 3912 Abel Drive, Columbia, PA 17512 Name_ _______________________________________________________ Address_ ______________________________________________________ City_______________________________ State_ ____ Zip_ ______________ Phone_ _____________________ Email______________________________ Number of copies_ ______ (Please include $20.80 for each copy) Credit card #______________________________________ Exp. date________ Signature of cardholder_________________________________CVV #________

Or send a check made payable to On-Line Publishers, Inc. You can also order online at www.50plusLIFEpa.com!

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February 2019

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On Life and Love after 50

Senior Dating Guilt: Let It Go Tom Blake

It surprises me how many seniors contact me regarding their guilt over dating. Take Donna, for example.

A widow since 2011, Donna emailed, “My friend passed away from cancer two years ago. Her ex-husband is the man I am writing to ask you about. We live in two different eastern states, not too far from each other. We are both in our early 60s, and at the end of 2018, we retired.

“I didn’t know him at all. I have seen him three times in the past 30 years for about 10 minutes just to say hi.

My friend said she and he never got along during 25 years of marriage.

“My friend — rest her soul — was very opinionated, controlling, and bossy with her husband and the children, which I witnessed one of the three times I saw him. ​It got to a point that when my friend and I talked over the phone, we never talked about him.

“We talked three times​a year, but I was the one who would call, until​that one day she called me to tell me she had cancer. By this time, she and he had been separated 10 years.​Now she is gone … their​children are grown and on their own and are not close to him, because of her.

“He and I have been talking over the phone for two years. We have become​good friends and have a lot in common​. I would like to see him, but I have the guilt​that he was my friend’s​husband hanging​over my head.

“Now, we are just friends. ​But what I am feeling ​guilty​​about is: If we do start​seeing each other, how would his www.50plusLifePA.com

grown children feel about us being​ together?

“His marriage and family life were​ calmly dysfunctional​, if you can picture that. We are both reluctant, but I know we will see each other soon. We are not getting any younger.

“We are both​healthy​​and able to still have fun before we die​, so why not? But the guilt?”

My response to Donna: Your friend had been separated for 10 years. She had a miserable marriage. Why worry about his children?

You say he is not close to them. They probably won’t care if you two start dating.

If you enjoy each other, go for it, now!

Live in the present.

Have you been together in person at all? Do that. You might find you want to be together or you may find you don’t.

You and your friend weren’t that close, talking to each other only three times a year.

One concern: If the family is dysfunctional, do you want to get involved in that?

For people age 60 and older, it’s hard enough to meet potential mates.

You’ve met a man you have much in common with.

Ditch the guilt. Wait no longer.

Get together in person and see what happens.

For dating information, previous articles, or to sign up for Tom’s complimentary, weekly e-newsletter, go to www.

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