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October 2014

Happy

HALLOWEEN

Too Soon? When is your child ready for Halloween? Meet the Kiernans Autism Advocates Presto Chang-o! The Amazing Arthur

THE BEST PLACE FOR KIDS.

Jack, age 4 Scoliosis

Visit ChildrensOmaha.org for more information on how we can help your child. For a pediatrician, family physician or pediatric specialist, call 1.800.833.3100.

inside

on the october 2014

features 8

Amazing Arthur Master family entertainer keeps it all in the family. 18 Riding off into the Parenting Sunset

Volume 2 • Issue 5 PUBLISHER Todd Lemke EXECUTIVE EDITOR David Williams MANAGING EDITOR Robert Nelson EDITORIAL INTERN Jillian Humphries

departments

6 education:

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Boys Town’s Learning Academy 7 school feature: Patrick Sawyer and the Amazing Technicolor Show Choir 10 meet the family: The Kiernans—Autism Advocates 12 diy: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle Costume 14 health: Building fit mommas 15 young hero: Claudia Archer 16 activity: Determining when your child is ready for Halloween. 20 lifestyle: Lark Blow Dry Studio 22 fashion: Ghouls and Goblins Galore 24 food: Cheddar Bacon Muffins 26 mom on the rocks: “The Talk” 27 fitness: Kick it off 28 calendar of events 30 the grandpa chronicles: 24 Hours

On the Cover: Camryn Kruse, 7, (Queen Elsa of Frozen). Carson Kruse, 11, (Captain America). Aiyana Jackson, 7, (Barbie Cheerleader). Jaiden Jackson, 9, (Leonardo of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles). Chloe Svendsen, 7, (Monster High Werewolf). Noah Svendsen, 9, (Zombie Pirate). Special thanks to Nobbies for providing the costumes and décor.

4 HerFamily • October 2014

CREATIVE DIRECTOR John Gawley DIRECTOR OF PHOTOGRAPHY & INTERACTIVE MEDIA Bill Sitzmann SENIOR GRAPHIC DESIGNER & WEB CONTENT MANAGER Kristen Hoffman GRAPHIC DESIGNER Rachel Joy CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Kristin E. Bieber, Ph.D. • Bev Carlson Jillian Humphries • Allison Janda • Leslie Murrell Tracy Ocuna • Kara Schweiss CONTRIBUTING PHOTOGRAPHERS Sarah Lemke • Elizabeth Tape ACCOUNT EXECUTIVES Gwen Lemke • Greg Bruns • Gil Cohen George Idelman • Vicki Voet ASSISTANT TO THE PUBLISHER Sandy Besch Matson ACCOUNT ASSISTANTS Alicia Smith Hollins • Jessica Linhart Dawn Dennis • Sydney Stander OPERATIONS Tyler Lemke ACCOUNTING Jim Heitz WAREHOUSE DISTRIBUTION MANAGER Mike Brewer Printed by Omaha Print For a one-year subscription (12 issues), send $9.95 to P.O. Box 461208, Papillion, NE 68046-1208. www.omahamagazine.com Original contributions become the property of Omaha Publications. Contributions cannot be acknowledged or returned. The information contained within HerFamily is for informational purposes only. It is not intended and should not be used to take the place of seeking professional advice, counsel or assistance. Omaha Publications makes no endorsement of and is not responsible for contributors or advertising herein. If you have concerns or questions related to your health, consult with your physician. HerFamily is protected by copyright and may not be reproduced in whole or in part without written permission of Omaha Publications, 402.884.2000. Owned and managed by Omaha Magazine, LTD

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When children need extra special care, Boys Town pediatric specialists are here to help. Our Board Certified physicians are known for their accurate diagnosis, treatment and care for childhood injuries and medical conditions.

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education

sponsored content by Kristin E. Bieber, Ph.D., Boys Town Center for Behavioral Health

Boys Town’s Learning Academy

Helps Struggling Students

t this point in the year, after students have returned from summer break and have readjusted to the routine of school, some students may continue to struggle to keep up academically with their peers. Despite extra practice at home and individualized attention at school, some students require more time and attention before their abilities catch up with their potential. The Boys Town Learning Academy, run by Boys Town’s Center for Behavioral Health, uses research-supported strategies to help students catch up and realize their full potential. The Learning Academy has two components: academic skills training (AST) and content area tutoring (CAT). Skills training is for students who need to improve foundational skills such as reading and math facts, and tutoring focuses on helping students in more advanced and specific subject areas.

ACADEMIC SKILLS TRAINING AST can help students develop skills in: • Reading: knowing letter sounds, recognizing letters, reading with few errors, and understanding what is read. • Writing: getting ideas on paper and using proper capitalization,

6 HerFamily • October 2014

punctuation, and grammar. • Math: identifying numbers, counting, and understanding math facts. • Spelling: spelling common words and memorizing word lists for tests. Often when students struggle with basic skills, the curriculum keeps moving while they fall further behind, causing confusion and frustration for families. To catch students up, clients who visit the Learning Academy are assigned a trained interventionist who is supervised by a licensed psychologist with a doctorate in School Psychology. Licensed psychologists develop an individualized plan that is monitored to promote student progress. In addition, the skills training program includes: • One-hour, individual sessions (frequency of sessions is determined based on the student’s needs). • Frequent parent meetings to share progress. • Training of parents, tutors, and teachers to carry out treatment and maintain progress over time.

English, math, science, and social studies. Before students begin attending tutoring sessions, they meet with a licensed psychologist who evaluates their strengths and needs to develop an individualized plan. Then each student is assigned a high school or college student who tutors them for one hour twice a week. Sending your child to tutoring at the Learning Academy isn’t just going to improve grades for one class. Students will also receive training in specific skills to improve organization, note-taking, and prioritizing work and assignments for long-term projects. Learning Academy psychologists and tutors want students to walk away with an increased understanding of the subject they once struggled with, and the skills needed to be successful with challenging courses in the future.

IS THE LEARNING ACADEMY FOR YOU? One of the unique things about the Learning Academy is that it is developed and supervised by licensed psychologists. As psychologists, they apply their training in research-supported academic and behavioral interventions to improve specific skills and to teach parents effective ways to support student learning and motivation. Both the Academic Skills Training and the Content Area Tutoring programs are goal-oriented, meaning Boys Town’s psychologists supervise and evaluate student progress on a regular basis. The Learning Academy provides an avenue for licensed psychologist to share some of the strategies that they know about with families in-need. The Learning Academy is a service open to all students in Omaha and the surrounding areas. If you think your student would benefit from individualized academic attention, check out the Learning Academy page on the Boys Town Pediatrics website, under the Counseling Services tab.

CONTENT AREA TUTORING The second component of the Learning Academy, tutoring, focuses on older students with subject-specific challenges in

Kristin E. Bieber, Ph.D.

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school feature

by David Williams photography by Sarah Lemke and Elizabeth Tape

Alone, Together

Patrick Sawyer and The Amazing Technicolor Show Choir

Patrick Sawyer

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nsect repellant? Check. Sleeping bag? Check. Top hat and cane? Check and check. The packing list for youth groups attending retreats at Camp Kitaki near Louisville can get a little odd—especially if the group in question is Westside High School’s Amazing Technicolor Show Choir. That’s where HerFamily found senior Patrick Sawyer, the son of Sandi and Adam Sawyer, on a recent Saturday morning. Sawyer was part of a select group of choir members who recently returned from a European tour that included a gig at the Notre Dame Cathedral in Paris and a performance of “God Bless America” at the Normandy American Cemetery overlooking the acres of white crosses that dot the scene of the D-Day invasion in 1944. Sure, those performances and more in Europe sent a chill down the spine of the student who will study architecture next year in college, but his most memorable moment was a free-spirited, slice-of-life scene found where he least expected it. “We were eating ice cream cones wandering through the town square in Nice (France),” Sawyer explains, when he and a friend stumbled upon a particularly entertaining street performer. Soon the choir members were dancing away in the street, egged on by the busker and the gathering crowd. And the dance they chose that day? “It was one of our ATSC bits of choreography, naturally!” Sawyer’s favorite number this year is

shaping up to be a jazzed-up version of “Ive Gotta Be Me” from the 1968 Broadway musical Golden Rainbow. That’s the tune that had the 50 members of the choir decked out in top hats and canes at Camp Kataki. The group is also supported by a 14-member band. The vaunted choir competes locally, regionally, and nationally. They’ve won three national championships from various sanctioning organizations. Notable alums include Tim Halperin, the Omaha native who found fame on American Idol in 2011. But show choir hasn’t always been this way. “Picture 16 kids in matching dresses from J.C. Penney,” says vocal director Doran Johnson in describing the formula of days gone. The world of show choir was once a decidedly static affair involving all but motionless kids on risers trying to get a rise out an audience. “Today it’s grown to include choreography, sets, props, multiple costume changes…What we do is the equivalent of performing mini Broadway musicals.” All the razzmatazz aside, Sawyer finds the same kind of camaraderie in show choir that his other friends find in sports. “When I’m out there performing with the people I love…well, it’s a pretty special feeling,” Sawyer says. “We’re all together— succeeding together—but it’s also very personal. I’m just in my own little world when I’m singing. When I’m on stage, nothing else matters.”

HerFamily • October 2014 7

feature Kara Schweiss by

photography by Bill Sitzmann

mazing Arthur once took the stage seconds after attendees learned that a co-worker was being taken off life support (“How do you pick up from that?”). He has managed countless hecklers and worked around endless interruptions like ringing cell phones and wailing babies. Offstage, there’s “helpful” criticism from people who don’t get jokes, such as his tagline touting “As viewed on YouTube 9 times!” or the fake anti-theft tag on his jacket. He’s had to listen to people appraising his looks while he’s standing right there. And he has to constantly deal with the disappointment of event organizers when turning down perpetual requests for free performances. With his education degree, he could spend his days in a relatively calm and climate-controlled classroom, but Amazing Arthur just can’t stop doing what he really loves: entertaining. And being amazing, of course. “About a decade ago, I came up with ‘Professional Showoff.’ It’s all-encompassing and you know right away this guy does something, he’s a showoff of some kind,” he says. “And it’s easier than saying, “Comedian, mentalist, magician, juggler, it-just-goes-on-forever.’” Using the stage name Arthur Fratelli (he’s Arthur Silknitter, Jr., in his civilian life), the Papillion family man makes a living doing hundreds of shows a year all over the country, managing his own marketing and serving as his own agent. “I’ve been doing this since I was in high school. I used to go the Old Market and street-perform and it slowly gained steam with the clientele as people would ask for my card. I work mainly word-of-mouth now,” Fratelli says. Then he quips: “I think 99 percent of it is good looks. I’m extremely attractive.” He may not take himself too seriously, but Fratelli is actually a serious businessman, offering his card to everyone he meets and constantly thinking of the next booking. “Seriously, I’d say it’s just the tenacity of working. The more you work, the more you work. I just do a good show and the calls come in,” he says. “It takes time and consistency. I try to give you a good value for your money, try to offer a variety of things, not just magic.”

8 HerFamily • October 2014

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Fratelli’s versatility means he can customize his performances for the client’s audience. and his business has expanded to handle bookings for other entertainers, like his real-life sister, balloon artist Poppin’ Penelope. The father of “three beautiful children, four total” (he admits that his wife doesn’t really love that line) is also already grooming the next generation. Fourteenyear-old son Joey has taken the Fratelli stage name with his own juggling act (his first paid gig was at 13), where the years of watching his dad perform have paid off in a stage presence beyond his years...never mind the fact that mom and dad still have to drive him to and from shows. Fratelli says the neighbors may get a little nervous when they spy flames in the backyard, but he assures them that Joey isn’t just playing with fire. Well, he is sort of playing with fire, but it’s all part of taking his juggling to the next level, and the proper safety precautions are in place. With Joey stepping into the flaming hot spotlight, 11-year-old juggler-in-training Lauren has taken her brother’s place as Dad’s occasional audience plant, with Fratelli letting his audience in on the joke sooner or later with the line, “I’ll bet her father is really good-looking.” As for the other two, Fratelli reports that his four-year-old daughter is still completely unimpressed with the family business at this point, but “my nine-yearold is very eager.” So if the youngest doesn’t warm up to the notion of professional showoffery, it would still work either way: the family could eventually become the Five Fratellis or top out as the Four Fratellis, both in the spirit of Amazing Arthur’s confessed love of alliteration. No two shows are ever the same, Fratelli says. He makes a point of staying up on pop culture so his stage patter is topical, and he relishes improvisation and audience participation. “A lot of entertainers who are onstage live perform as if it’s a movie. They press ‘play’ and it’s the same scenes at the same time. If something happens—a phone goes off, somebody leaves, somebody walks in—I have to incorporate it; that’s why I can’t do a rehearsed show,” he says. “I have to be able to work with the audience.”

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HerFamily • October 2014 9

meet the family

by Kara Schweiss photography by Sarah Lemke

The Kiernans

i Cecilia, 5, Asher, 3, Colin, 4, and Tres, 7.

10 HerFamily • October 2014

Autism Advocates

n 2010, Renee and T.J. Kiernan were still adjusting to their oldest son’s recent diagnosis of autism—trying to understand the complex condition and exploring educational, medical, and therapy options—when the little boy had a life-threatening mishap. “Tres takes a medication that helps him fall asleep at night; it’s actually a heart medication for adults,” Renee Kiernan says. “One night I was giving him his medication and my daughter came into the room and wanted to show me something. I was saying, ‘What, honey?’ when I knocked the bottle onto the floor.” In a flash, Tres had ingested at least three pills, six times his nightly dose and a potentially fatal quantity for a 3-year-old. Emergency personnel administered activated charcoal by force, “which would be hard enough for a neurotypical kid”, Kiernan says, but the treatment was traumatic for Tres, who could be overwhelmed with sensory stimuli even under everyday circumstances. Although she knew that the actions of the medical team helped save her son’s life, the experience was “horrible” for Kiernan as well. “I was so new to the diagnosis that I didn’t know how to advocate for him,” Kiernan recalls. “And I had [once] gone to school to become a paramedic.” Soon after Tres’s accident, Kiernan approached early childhood experts in the Papillion-La Vista school district with an informal training proposal. They then formed a task force with Planning Region 23, a group that coordinates services for young children with special needs who live within the school district’s geographic boundaries (Kiernan serves the group as a parent representative). Expecting to organize a single, one-time training session for local emergency personnel, she was surprised by the demand and level of interest from the community and elsewhere in the state. Soon Kiernan created what became Nebraska Parent & Responders Partnership. “That’s what made me decide to start a nonprofit, where I could omahamagazine.com

Molly Maid clean is now green! write the training materials and offer (a program), and it expanded from there,” she says, adding that the organization now also offers advocacy training to parents. “There really isn’t a lot of training out there. I don’t even have to market myself; people come to me.” The organization’s training is conducted by Dennis Debbaudt, considered the leading global voice on autism and special needs training for law enforcement and emergency responders. Debbaudt is the parent of a young man with autism and in 1994 was the first to formally address the interaction between law enforcement and people with autism and special needs. He’s also one of most sought-after speakers in the autism community. The Kiernans, who now have four children (Tres, 7; Cecilia, 5; Colin, 4; and Asher, 3), are involved in other autism advocacy efforts from heading parent social groups to organizing sensoryfriendly holiday events, and Renee Kiernan has served on the board of the Autism Society of Nebraska-Omaha Support Network. There’s always more that can be done, she says. Nebraska Parent & Responders Partnership gets regular requests for autism awareness training for various community professionals who interact with children and young adults. She’s also looking ahead to someday develop training for medical personnel who work with adolescents who have special needs—and the parents of these teens, too—perhaps on how to talk about puberty and sexuality or identifying potential abuse of vulnerable young adults who may be inhibited by communication limitations. “Where I see it evolving is continuing to be in the medical profession and continuing to be advocating for parents,” she says. In the meantime, the Kiernans are focusing on raising their young family and doing everything they can to ensure Tres has opportunities for the same childhood experiences as any other kid. “When we were given the diagnosis, I thought they were going to tell me he was a genius and would need to start the first grade, and that was not what they told me. They said ‘He has autism and you need to seek a medical diagnosis’,” Kiernan says. “I just remember wanting to bawl, to cry and cry and cry in front of all these therapists. Then I was like, ‘You know what? I don’t ever want my son to see me shed a tear for autism or to hear me say I’m sorry he has autism.’ I don’t want him to hear me apologize for it, ever.” The Kiernans are already preparing Tres to be his own advocate when he is older and more independent. “Once T.J. and I caught up and educated ourselves and were okay with it, it was a small conversation: ‘You’ll have more questions later, but you may have noticed that things are different for you,’” Kiernan explains. “He loves that I talk about it, and that makes it okay for him to talk about it.” Tres’s primary message, when he does talk about autism, is this: “We like to have fun. We’re just kids.” And his mom is just a mom. “I go with my strength, and my strength is that I’m a mom. I wouldn’t say that I’m ordinary—not that I’m extraordinary, either—but, really, anybody can advocate and educate,” Kiernan says. “That’s my motto: Advocate, educate, repeat. And I want my son to do that, too.” bestofomaha.com

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HerFamily • October 2014 11

diy

by Jillian Humphries photography by Sarah Lemke

Turtle Power

The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles are back for Halloween.

s fall arrives in Omaha there is much to get excited about. Pumpkin patches and haunted houses open for a screaming good time and, of course, costumes must be planned. Though there are costume shops as far as the eye can see, they can be quite pricey. Even supermarkets can ask a little too much for a piece of fabric and a mask, just so that your child can have the same outfit as 10 of his or her classmates. In light of this predicament and the recent debut of the new Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie, here is a DIY that is sure to impress.

TOOLS TO BECOME A NINJA: • Two paint brushes, small and large • Black and green acrylic paint (acrylic is easiest to fix mistakes with because it dries quickly and it’s opaque) • One can of a medium-tone green spray paint • One blue felt square (we created Leonardo. Feel free to substitute other color). • One aluminum-roasting pan (some have rounded edges. We opted for grooved). • One adult cardboard shirt form • One piece of thick brown ribbon or old leather belt • Velcro and green felt strips

12 HerFamily • October 2014

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ADVICE FROM A OUR WISE DIY MASTER: • Feel free to use fabric or hot glue for the mask if sewing isn’t your forte. • Getting the kids involved will make this costume more fun but be careful when cutting the cardboard; this should be a job strictly for mom and dad. • All items can be found at a craft store.

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STEP 1 Trace roasting pan shape onto cardboard; cut out.

STEP 2 Spray paint outside of roasting pan. Use small brush to paint in-between sections black.

STEP 3 Use large brush to paint cardboard pieces yellow. Use small brush to outline features on shell.

STEP 4

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Print mask stencil from Internet, trace, and cut out mask pieces; sew together.

STEP 5 Secure front and back shell together by top and side edges using Velcro and green strips. When ready to wear, tie ribbon or belt around entire shell with tie in front.

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HerFamily • October 2014 13

health

Interior Design

by Traci Osuna photography by Sarah Lemke

Accent Decor & Floral Design FREE In-Home Consultation

Fit Mama

Building fit mommas

others of newborns can feel overjoyed and overwhelmed; beautiful and bountiful at the same time. Working to get your figure back, or even just to lose a few pounds, is something that most moms are looking to do as soon as possible. But getting into a routine of going to the gym and finding someone to watch the baby on a regular basis can be challenging. Some of us may not be comfortable leaving our newborn with a gym daycare. Working out at home is fine, but really… wouldn’t it be nice to be around women going through the same experiences? Problem solved: Introducing Fit Mama Workouts. Launched in May by Liz Sampson, these boot camp-style classes range in intensity and target moms of all ages and fitness levels. “Basically, we cater to what works best with each mom and the kids that they bring with them,” explains Sampson. Sampson strives to bring a wide variety of options to both the women who attend her classes and the children who accompany them. “The moms do their workout and we just kind of build the kids into the routine,” Sampson says. “They play with their friends and there are other activities that we bring—bubbles, colors, and sidewalk chalk.” The children can also exercise alongside mom if they want. “There are a lot of times when the moms will be out on the mats and the kids will be part of it too.” The children in strollers are a captive audience, as the moms push the strollers while

14 HerFamily • October 2014

running and participating in circuit training. “The kids witness their moms working out and see the positive example of it. It gets into their heads, at an early age, that exercise is a fun and positive thing.” As a licensed group fitness instructor certified in perinatal and postnatal exercise, Sampson even encourages pregnant women to join in. “I know modifications that would be suitable for pregnant women and women who have just had babies.” During this summer, classes were held at two different outdoor venues—Zorinsky Lake Park near 156th and F streets, and Lawrence Youngman Lake near 192th Street and West Dodge Road. Oak View Mall provided the indoor location, where the ladies meet in front of J.C. Penney on the lower level. With the fall season, outdoor workouts will be moving inside. That location has yet to be determined. “It’s a non-intimidating workout atmosphere because we’re all moms and we’re all there to encourage each other,” she says. She also wants people to know that they will be getting a real workout. “We’ve had new moms with brand new babies; some of the girls will go run a lap and some of the girls will walk it …we cater to everyone.” Sampson says that not only have her clients lost weight, but they have found friendships as well. “I’ve seen women who didn’t know each other at all, and over the months, they became great workout friends; and their kids have become great friends.”

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young hero

by Kara Schweiss photography by Sarah Lemke

CLAUDIA’S ESSAY

The Story of Standing Bear

Claudia Archer’s winning essay on the famous chief started as just another class assignment.

hen 12-year-old Claudia Archer received a cell phone call from her mother informing her that she had won an essay contest, her reaction was more bewilderment than triumph. “I’m like, ‘What essay is this?’” she says. School was already out for the year and the Brownell-Talbot middle-schooler had written a lot of essays in her sixth-grade writer’s workshop class. “My writing teacher, Mr. G.—Mr. Goetschkes—had us write an essay each week. And every now and again he threw in an essay contest, and one of them was the Standing Bear essay.” Months had passed since the assignment, but Archer finally recognized her work: “I realized I wrote it and that I won! I was really excited, but it was a shocker.” The contest was sponsored by the Nebraska Commission on Indian Affairs and McDonald’s with the objective of generating awareness, especially among youth, of the many accomplishments of Ponca Chief Standing Bear. By contest guidelines for the middle school category, Archer was limited to 200 words and her essay had to demonstrate original thinking

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and her own opinion. Her final entry was, as she puts it, “short and sweet,” and Robert Goetschkes, her writer’s workshop teacher, agrees. “The Standing Bear essay was one of those in-class, full-on writing process activities, so she had a lot of time to work on it and revise it, get feedback from some of her classmates, that sort of thing,” he explains. Goetschkes, who is with BrownellTalbot’s English department, says he actively seeks multiple writing competition opportunities for his students every year, and hopes that someday a master database will exist to increase participation. “I have found that in all of these writing contests I’ve done that I get the same response: ‘I wish more teachers did this’. What I say is, ‘I wish more teachers knew about it’,” he says. “I think if even one student wins every year, it has an impact. I tell the kids that even if you don’t win you are operating at your best when you are competing.” The four Chief Standing Bear essay contest winners (one in each age category: elementary school, middle school, high school, and college) received

“There is a road in the hearts of all of us, hidden and seldom traveled.” -Chief Standing Bear Chief Standing Bear was a great individual. He was born in 1829 and died in 1908. He became a great leader for the Ponca tribe. Sadly he went through the terrible death of his son, due to harsh weather and his burial became an adventure. Ensuring his burial was in his homeland was important to him. In January 1879, Standing Bear and his followers abandoned the Indian Territory to accomplish it. On the way to their ancestral homeland, Standing Bear and his followers got captured and taken to Fort Omaha, Nebraska. In the spring of 1879, a journalist interviewed him and published a story that grasped many of the public’s attention. Because of this, many lawyers tried to prevent Standing Bear from going back to Indian Territory. It is said the story explained why the tribe was divided. The majority of the Southern Ponca went to the Indian Territory, but Chief Standing Bear and his followers returned to Nebraska and became the Northern Ponca. 88 years after his death, a tall bronze statute reminds us of this leader today.

a $25 McDonald’s Arch Card and Kindle e-Reader, plus saw their essays appear on tray liners in McDonald’s restaurants throughout the state this summer. Archer and her fellow honorees attended a May reception at the Governor’s Mansion hosted by first lady Sally Ganem and were allowed to bring two guests; Archer chose her parents, Ed and Nuria. “They’re proud of me and they were really excited for me,” she says. “She’s a very hard worker, she dedicates a lot of time and is very patient,” Nuria Archer says. “And she has the biggest heart you’ve ever seen. Everybody tells me she’s way beyond her years.”

HerFamily • October 2014 15

activity

by Allison Janda photography by Sarah Lemke

Child Psychologist Holly Roberts of the Monroe-Meyer Institute.

Too Soon?

Deciding when your child is ready for Halloween. “Feeling safe should always be the first thing a child feels with a parent or a caregiver. They will follow that lead.” -Holly Roberts

t what age did you first think it was entertaining to have a seven-foot-tall psychopath in a hockey mask leap out in front of you wielding a shrieking, smoke-belching 80cc chainsaw? Six? College age? Never? While many parents dress their children up starting at a young age, there does come a time when your child may need to be “prepared” for the upcoming All Hallows Eve as well as its associated events. As a parent, you’ve determined the readiness of your child in many ways. Going out for the soccer team, starting preschool, and even potty training are just a few examples. According to Holly Roberts, a child psychologist in the Munroe-Meyer Institute at the University of Nebraska

16 HerFamily • October 2014

Medical Center, a parent should take cues from their child to determine which Halloween activities—haunted houses, trick-or-treating, and more—are appropriate. “Children around the age of seven sometimes up to about 10 are magical thinkers. They don’t have the ability to rationalize a situation,” she says. Therefore, it’s very important to expose your children to scary things when they are ready. Roberts shares that Halloween is designed to be a fun event for children and families. But, there’s no doubt there are those that approach the holiday with the intent to frighten or terrorize others. Fear, Roberts insists, is both powerful and instinctual—protecting humans from harm. Fear obviously isn’t just confined to Halloween—it will arise regardless of the time of year. As a parent, it is important to anticipate opportunities that will allow you to teach your child about fear, she says. That’s when Halloween can actually be helpful to a child’s development. The more exposure to “safe fear” that a child experiences with a trusted parent or guardian, the less fear they will likely experience on days dedicated to the possibility, such as Halloween. There are many ways that you can expose your child to fear in a safe environment. If your child is requesting to watch a scary movie and it seems appropriate to proceed, omahamagazine.com

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BE UNFORGETTABLE introduce them to a somewhat scary movie during daylight hours. Another opportunity Roberts suggests is to visit a store around Halloween with your child to try on different masks and costumes. The masks can be funny or scary and should always be lifted to reveal the face beneath them. If your child seems to be handling the fear of Halloween well and is interested in participating in activities such as visiting a pumpkin patch, trick-or-treating, or walking through a haunted house, arrange it when you and a trusted friend or sibling can go, too. “Feeling safe should always be the first thing a child feels with a parent or a caregiver. They will follow that lead,” Roberts says. The more people present that a child feels safe with, the better. Most important is to remember that not all children are ready at the same time. Halloween is supposed to be fun and enjoyable, especially for kids.

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feature

sponsored content by Bev Carlson, Lutheran Family Services of Nebraska

Riding Off

into the Parenting Sunset

s I write this, my little girl is deciding what she’s going to wear her first day of high school. My Baby Girl. In High School. I’ve written a column or two before about how fast the parenting years fly by. There was the “I can’t believe they are starting kindergarten,” to the “I can’t believe they’ve finished elementary school,” and the shock of my oldest starting middle school, then high school.... And now, my youngest—who is, by the way, far taller than me now—is excited and a little nervous to be starting her high school career. She’s excited. I’m stunned. She will do very well. She’s organized, smart and very conscientious. She has great and loyal friends. She has a devoted family, plus great confidence and self-esteem. So good, so far. But the other part of this whole equation is how I am no longer counting the years that my oldest will be home. I’m down to months. Twentythree to be exact. He’s starting his junior year, so about 23 months from today, I will be waving goodbye to him at his college dorm. I’m actually starting to pin ideas for graduation parties and think about how to put his scrapbooks together. I can’t even begin to tell you how incredibly far away that all once seemed. Over the years, we have attended many graduation parties for the children of friends, but my kids were the ones playing on the swings or chasing each other around the yard. Thinking of them as one day being the honoree being asked, “So, have you decided what you want to study?” or “Where are you going to college?” or “Do you know what you want to do for a career?” seemed like a far, far distant eventuality. I mean, these were my little kids, after all. But there it is—time has moved on. I am now the parent of two amazing high school kids. We will spend this school year talking about ACT scores, college visits, and dreams for the future. We will have crazy schedules, as many meals together as we can, and important conversations about working hard and

18 HerFamily • October 2014

being kind. I will continue to hold my breath until my 16-year-old driver makes it home safely every night. A couple of years ago I begged young mothers to listen when someone older reminded them how short their time was with their children. One day, far sooner than she wants or expects, her babies will no longer throw fits in the grocery store, have meltdowns during church, or poop all over her clean floor. One day, far sooner than she wants or expects, she and her husband will yet again be able to have a date without having to worry about a babysitter. One day, far sooner than she wants or expects, there will no longer be sticky fingers on her sofa, a washing machine filled with the evidence of two children sick at 3 a.m., and no more frantic calls to the doctor when the fever spikes at 102. As these things begin to disappear, so will the other things. That sweet baby smell when they first come out of the bath. The toddler who crawls into your lap for kisses. The preschooler so excited to show you how he can write his name. Or ride a bike. In all of the busyness that is our lives, during days that sometimes seem like they will never end, things begin to slip away. And you barely notice it until it’s too late. And then, when you do realize it, sometimes you cry. Because unless someone reminds you, you forget that you are in a season of your life. A very, very important season—where you have the privilege of being the parent of young children. And although the days can be long, difficult, and challenging, the time is so very, very short. So, I guess as I head into this last phase of parenting my kids at home, I wanted to revisit my encouragement to parents of younger children. Keep it all in perspective. Be mindful of what stuff matters and what really doesn’t. Most stuff doesn’t. Your kids do. omahamagazine.com

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lifestyle

by Allison Janda photography by Bill Sitzmann

On a Lark

Omaha joins the blow-dry salon craze.

Sara Slimp

20 HerFamily • October 2014

etween running errands, picking up the kids from school, grocery shopping and work, it’s difficult for a woman to find some time for herself. Thankfully, if you have an hour and you happen to be near 120th and Blondo, a good spur-ofthe-moment pampering just got a lot easier. Lark Blow Dry Studio is the first of its kind in Omaha and focuses on only one thing: Blowouts. “That concept is huge on the east and west coasts,” says Sara Slimp, Lark’s founder. “By only doing blowouts, it allows us a lot of flexibility for our clients. We’re here to do one thing and to do it well.” A blowout, for those who don’t know, includes a wash, a blowdry, and a style of your choice: anything from straight as a board to beach waves or curls. Keep in mind that blowouts aren’t just for feeling pampered. Lark caters to women who want a sleek style for dates, job interviews, business functions, and more. Unlike many hair studio and spa owners around the Omaha metro, Slimp doesn’t have a background in cosmetology. Laughing, she confesses that she’s actually an accountant by trade. Prior to opening Lark, she had worked in corporate America. While she loved her time there, she was ready for something different. Slimp says she has a bucket list of things she wishes to accomplish in her lifetime. After leaving her last job, the universe aligned with her decision to open a blow-dry studio. “It just kept happening,” Slimp says. “I found a location. I got a loan. All of a omahamagazine.com

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sudden I owned a blow dry studio.” Slimp adds that her background in accounting has been a huge asset for starting a new business. The studio certainly is a welcoming space. The vibe lingers somewhere between funky and glamorous, yet casual. When you arrive, you’re even offered a tablet, allowing you to read magazines while you wait or as you get your hair done. “Eventually they set it aside,” Sara mentions. “We don’t take time in our culture to just sit and be. Here, there’s not anyone pulling on you or demanding anything from you. And women need that. The next time women come in they don’t even ask for a tablet.” Be warned, ladies: If you’re seeking a cut and color in addition to your blow dry, you won’t find that at Lark. Blowouts, which are $40, are the salon’s only offering. Slimp says that keeping things simple gives her more flexibility when working with their clients. Appointments, even those made the day of a desired blow out, are easily bookable from your computer or phone. “When you’re a mom, self-care is so important,” Slimp says. “No matter where you’re at in life—a caregiver, a mom, a busy professional—taking an hour for yourself and getting your hair done makes you feel good.” bestofomaha.com

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HerFamily • October 2014 21 7/1/2014 4:29:13 PM

Ghouls and Goblins Galore This Yearâ€™s Hottest Costumes

The metro will soon be swarming with all sorts of adorable and (notso) terrifying creatures and characters. Here are some of the most popular looks for scaring up some good old-fashion fun. Costumes and dĂŠcor provided by Nobbies. Camryn Kruse, 7, (Queen Elsa of Frozen). Carson Kruse, 11, (Captain America). Aiyana Jackson, 7, (Barbie Cheerleader). Jaiden Jackson, 9, (Leonardo of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles). Chloe Svendsen, 7, (Monster High Werewolf). Noah Svendsen, 9, (Zombie Pirate).

food

sponsored content by Children’s Hospital & Medical Center

ingredients • 1 cup whole wheat flour • 3/4 cup yellow cornmeal • 1 tsp baking powder • 1 tsp baking soda • 1/4 tsp ground cumin • 1/8 tsp salt • 1/2 cup (2 oz) shredded reduced-fat sharp cheddar cheese • 2 slices turkey

•

• • •

bacon, cooked, drained, and crumbled 2 jalapeño peppers, seeded and minced, optional 2 Tbsp chopped scallions 1 1/4 cups low fat buttermilk 1/4 cup canola oil 1 large egg, lightly beaten

preparation 1. Preheat oven to 375°. Line a 12cup muffin tin with paper liners and lightly coat with nonstick cooking spray. 2. In a large bowl, combine flour, cornmeal, baking powder, baking soda, cumin, and salt. Stir in cheddar cheese, bacon, jalapeños, and scallions; make a well in center of mixture. 3. In a small bowl, whisk buttermilk, oil, and egg until combined. Add buttermilk mixture to flour mixture, stirring just until moist. 4. Divide batter evenly among muffin cups. Bake for 15 minutes, or until a wooden pick inserted in center comes out clean. Cool for five minutes in pan on a wire rack.

Cheddar Bacon

Muffins

his healthy muffin is a perfect grab-and-go breakfast or snack. Made with whole wheat flour, it packs a savory taste that fits any time of the day.

Find more great recipes at HealthyKohlsKids.com. The Healthy Kohl’s Kids program is a partnership between Children’s Hospital & Medical Center and Kohl’s Department Stores to educate children and parents about healthy nutrition and fitness.

Nutrition Facts: Calories: 148, Fat: 7 g, Saturated Fat: 2 g, Cholesterol: 24 mg, Sodium: 113 mg, Carbohydrates: 16 g, Fiber: 2 g, Protein: 5 g Yield: 12 muffins

24 HerFamily • October 2014

omahamagazine.com

We’re more than Christmas! Many of you know us as the #1 Christmas music artist in history. But did you know that we’re also one of the very few best-selling Halloween music artists? Our Halloween CDs feature spooky tracks as “The Adams Family”, “Monster Mash” and more as only Mannheim Steamroller can do! There’s also spine-tingling sound effects and even dance moves, everything you need on All Hallows’ Eve!!! Visit our store at mannheimsteamroller.com for your Halloween celebrations and much more. You’ll find food, apparel, gift and other items and -- of course -- Grammyawarding winning music! And watch for our new Christmas CD, Mannheim Steamroller 30/40, coming this October as we celebrate 30 years of Christmas and 40 years since the first album in our Fresh Aire series!!!! 9130 Mormon Bridge Road, Omaha, NE 68152

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Opening OCTOBER 18

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HerFamily • October 2014 25

mom on the rocks by Leslie Murrell

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26 HerFamily • October 2014

“The Talk”

ast year’s battle of Halloween was the kids’ standoff to replace their trick-or-treat buckets for pillow cases. Because, “Mom, you can hold way more candy in a pillow case!” I knew this meant an equal quest for cavities and independence. I couldn’t even convince them to bring their holidayspecific, over-priced buckets back and dump them into a pillowcase, and then go back out. They wanted to go out for one candy run. The catch—they’re not coming back until the pillowcase is full. I’m trying to remember how it is that there is a designated day of the year when all us parents lose our minds, dress up our kids (sometimes in drag), and then send them out in the dark to go knock on strangers’ doors for candy. And yet, I send them on their merry way to collect as much candy as they can possibly fit in the pillowcase. They don’t believe me at how heavy that can get and when they’re that far away. It’ll be blocks away, and I won’t hear it, but in the dark

of the night, with their burning biceps and candy weighing them down—they’ll whisper, “Mom was right.” We’ve reached a turning point of Halloween. My kids are 11 now. And although you may think that’s still young enough to trick-or-treat, the other element is they stand taller than most adults. We can’t find age appropriate costumes in their size either. But mostly, if their quest for candy is their big desire, then it’s just time to let them pass on the torch to the 5-year-olds they may inadvertently knock over as they run from door to door. So, we have The Talk. Consider it the Geneva Negotiations of Halloween 2014. It’s time to retire from trick-or-treating. In return for my demands, my precious tweens have made their own: take the money I spend on their costumes and buy them all of their favorite candy. I tack on a few toothbrushes and floss. With a few nods and pinky promises, we agree. As we all grieve a rite of passage for a kid—trickor-treating, we bid farewell. omahamagazine.com

fitness

by HerFamily staff photography by Bill Sitzmann

Kick it Off

repare to kick off those pounds! This exercise combines both a leg and an ab workout to strengthen your lower half. Make sure you are on a flat surface and wear shoes with tread to help maintain balance.

HUSKER

FILM NIGHTS REVIEW OF THE PREVIOUS WEEK’S GAME WITH COACHES COMMENTARY AND LIVE Q & A WITH HUSKER STAFF

LOOK SHARP

This Halloween

Starting Sept. 4th every Thursday night following a game doors @ 5:30p.m. film @ 7:30p.m.

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GET TO KNOW YOU BETTER Have you ever wondered what you will look like in 10 or 20 years? Why does your voice sound different from another member of your family? In other words, what makes you… you? Come explore the diverse influences that make us who we are. See how everything from brain chemistry to our environment impacts how we view ourselves, and take part in fun and exciting stations that will shed new light on how you see yourself! Best of all, your experience in Identity will be totally unique – that’s why it’s an “exhibition of you!”

Exercise 1. Start with forearms on floor,

I D E N TI TY

hands clasped, hips piked, on toes.

I D E NT I T Y

2. Extend right leg up and out at

A N E X H I B I T I O N O F YO U

a 45-degree angle.

3. Return to start. Repeat on opposite side for one rep.

4. Do three sets of 12 reps.

AN EXHIBITION October 11, 2014 - January 11, 2015

O F YO U

Identity is an exhibition developed and produced by The Franklin Institute. It is supported locally by the Douglas County Commissioners, the Lincoln Financial Foundation, Durham Society, David Scott Foundation, Dillon Foundation, Mammel Foundation, Gilbert M. and Martha H. Hitchcock Foundation and Fraser Stryker PC LLO. Media support provided by KMTV Channel 3 and Journal Broadcast Group.

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HerFamily • October 2014 27

Calendar of Events KIDZ BOP KIDS

Spooktacular

Fall Chrysanthemum Show

FOR THE KIDS

FOR THE FAMILY

FOR MOM & DAD

COBWEB CASTLE

25TH ANNUAL OLD-TIME RURAL MUSIC GATHERING

FALL CHRYSANTHEMUM SHOW

OCTOBER 1-31, OMAHA CHILDREN’S MUSEUM – 500 S. 20TH ST. The not-so-scary haunted house gives

OCTOBER 3-5, CHRISTENSEN FIELD HOUSE

BANCROFT ST. Enjoy the beauty of autumn

young visitors a chance to experience a taste of

– 710 W. 16TH ST., FREMONT Featuring top quality

with brightly colored chrysanthemums, unique

the Halloween creepies without fear. Cobweb

local, regional and national talent performing

designs, water features and textures. 9am-5pm,

Castle will be open all month in October and will

country, folk and bluegrass tunes. 10am-11pm,

$3-$7. 402-346-4002

feature old favorites like the spooky graveyard

$15. 712-762-4363

– LAURITZENGARDENS.ORG

and neon nook, plus new shrieks and thrills in

- NTCMA.NET

OCTOBER 4-NOVEMBER 23, LAURITZEN GARDENS - 100

ANTIQUE AND GARDEN SHOW

the noodle forest, portrait parlor, and Witch’s hut. Free with regular museum admission.

STRATEGIC AIR & SCARE

SEPTEMBER 19-21, LAURITZEN GARDENS - 100 BANCROFT

402-930-2352

OCTOBER 1–31, STRATEGIC AIR & SPACE MUSEUM, I–80

ST. Spectacular gardens, lectures and beautiful

- OCM.ORG

EXIT 426. See the spooky side of the museum

antiques ranging from porcelain, silver, jewelry

all month long. 10am–5pm daily. $6–$12.

and paintings to furniture. $15, free admission

KIDZ BOP KIDS

402–944–3100

for members. 402-346-4002.

OCTOBER 4, RALSTON ARENA, 7300 Q ST. For four

– SASMUSEUM.COM

- LAURITZENGARDENS.ORG

been named Billboard Magazine’s “No. 1 Kids’

GIFFORD FARM FAMILY NATURE DAY

Artist,” thanks in large part to their best-selling

OCTOBER 18, GIFFORD FARM EDUCATION CENTER - 700

albums, music videos and national KIDZ BOP TV

CAMP GIFFORD RD. An afternoon of safe and fun

ANDY WARHOL IN LIVING COLOR: CONTEMPORARY PRINTS FROM JORDAN D. SCHNITZER

commercials. Debuting at No. 3 on the Billboard

trick or treating. Visit the animals, take a slide

OCTOBER 4 - JANUARY 11, JOSLYN ART MUSEUM - 2200

Top 200 chart with their latest album release

into the straw, ride on the wooden rocking

DODGE ST. This exhibit examines how color

KIDZ BOP 25, the franchise sold over 1 million

horse or play games. 10am- 4pm, $5 per

impacts both subject and viewer, creating a

albums in 2013 alone. 2 pm. Tickets $20.

child trick or treating. 402-597-4920

dialogue between Warhol and 19 contemporary

– RALSTONARENA.COM

- ESU3.ORG

artists who all use color to shape how we

FROM FIELD TO FORK

SPOOKTACULAR

OCTOBER-APRIL, OMAHA CHILDREN’S MUSEUM - 500 S.

OCTOBER 18-NOVEMBER 1, OMAHA’S HENRY DOORLY

20TH ST. Exhibit teaches kids and their families

ZOO & AQUARIUM - 3701 S. 10TH ST. Bring your little

all about the role of agriculture in their daily

ghouls and goblins to Omaha’s Henry Doorly

LANCASTER ANTIQUE SHOW AND SALE

lives and what is produced in Nebraska. $9,

Zoo and Aquarium for Spooktacular presented

OCTOBER 11-12, LANCASTER EVENT CENTER - 84TH &

free admission for kids under 24 months

by Hy-Vee. Event held Fri-Sun, 5:30-8:30pm,

HAVELOCK AVE., LINCOLN. Established show of

of age. 402-930-2352

$7-$8. 402-738-2047

33 years featuring quality antiques including

- OCM.ORG

- OMAHAZOO.COM

books, country primitives, furniture, glassware,

consecutive years, the KIDZ BOP Kids have

understand images. 402-342-3300. - JOSLYN.ORG

pottery, folk art, early Americana and more. Sat,

GIFFORD FARM FAMILY FUN SATURDAY

9am-5pm; Sun, 10am-4pm, $4. 402-432-1451 - LANCASTEREVENTCENTER.COM

OCTOBER 4, GIFFORD FARM EDUCATION CENTER 700 CAMP GIFFORD RD. Country Kindness Day.

DAVID SEDARIS

See the signs of spring in the Outdoor Nature

OCTOBER 30, HOLLAND PERFORMING ARTS CENTER

Classroom, visit the animals that live at Gifford

– 13TH & DOUGLAS STREETS. Comedian and

Farm or enjoy some bake sale goodies. 10am-

author David Sedaris is renowned for his self-

2pm, $5/person over age 2. Half price with

deprecating style. 7:30pm. 402-345-0606

Military ID. 402-597-4920

– OMAHAPERFORMINGARTS.ORG

- ESU3.ORG

28 HerFamily • October 2014

omahamagazine.com

You’ll be impressed.

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Spooktacular with Magician Keith West

Saturday, Oct. 18 • 7:30 pm • Holland Center

Sunday, Oct. 26 • Holland Center

Music from Harry Potter, Jaws, Beetlejuice, The Bride of Frankenstein, The Exorcist, The Omen, The Rocky Horror Picture Show, and more!

1:15 PM Lobby Activities • 2:00 PM Concert Costume Contest & Trick-or-Treating!

Tickets Start at $19

Adults & Kids: $12

402.345.0606 | OMAHASYMPHONY.ORG The Monster Mash performance has no visuals. bestofomaha.com

HerFamily • October 2014 29

the grandpa chronicles by David Williams

24 Hours Flying Solo With the Grandkids

ulie and I have had our grandchildren overnight a good number of times. When working as a tag team, we’re old pros at caring for and entertaining Easton (4) and Barrett (3). A recent weekend presented my first opportunity (That’s the proper word for it, isn’t it? “Opportunity?”) to fly solo in caring for the kids. Julie was off to Des Moines to visit family while the boys’ parents, Lauren and Eric, were cultivating sunburns in lazily floating down a river somewhere on the periphery of the metro. This chronology of events meant that I would be left alone with the kids for a mere 24 hours or so. Protestations of “Are you sure you can handle this?” and “We could always find some other solution to childcare,” had a downright infantilizing effect and called into question the amount of confidence my loved ones had in me. Me! Did they forget that I’m a big boy? Did they forget that I had a hand in raising three kids of my own? Sure, that was back when The Gipper was in the Whitehouse but, c’mon, can’t a guy get at least a little respect? If TV sitcoms are any barometer, American families are often led by a stumbling, fumbling oaf. The airwaves are crowded with such buffoons. Put that man in a kitchen with young kids when

30 HerFamily • October 2014

mom is away, for example, and it’s almost certain to result in a clichéd scene involving flour, eggs, and milk coating every surface of the room. And its inhabitants. But I’m not that guy…am I? My plan was a simple one. I would occupy the kids by taking them to the zoo. On the way home we would stick close to the river and stroll across the Bob Kerrey Pedestrian Bridge after splashing around in the water feature at the base of that span. Wear ‘em out while having fun. That was the plan. The zoo was, as always, a magnificent trek spanning all seven continents. We rode the train. We galloped along on the merry-go-round. Slithering reptiles winked at us through alien eyes. An obliging gorilla even flung some feces—always a hit with my doody-obsessed grandkids. But Easton was flagging fast at the three-hour mark as we made our way back to the car. I felt naps would be in order before we conquered the bridge, so homeward we went. I had no idea as to the extent of Easton’s discomfort until he—without a hint of warning—projectile vomited directly into a basket of fresh laundry that awaited folding. The only good news was that I had very little mess to clean up from the new-ish rug before trudging down to the basement with a putrid load to confront a machine that had every right to mock me with a taunt of “Back so soon?” After a four-hour nap (Four hours! A new family record!) Easton was magically back to being his old bouncing-off-the-walls self again. There was still plenty of daylight for meandering over the bridge suspended above the swirling eddies of what Barrett calls the “Chocolate River.” The whole experience reminded me of an old magazine photo feature (Life? Look?) that involved placing the legendary Olympian Jesse Owens in the home of a toddler. His challenge was to ape every movement the small boy made. So the star of the 1936 Olympic Games bounced and crawled and scaled and slithered right alongside the small lad. Until, that is, the greatest athlete on the planet crashed at about the two-hour mark. So it was with a certain sense of self-satisfaction that I gently laid the kids to bed that night. The doddering old fool that nobody trusted had not only survived, but had thrived—save for a little upchuck—in his assigned duties. The fact that my bedtime followed only minutes later, even before dusk could yield to a blanket of stars, was completely irrelevant. Completely.

omahamagazine.com

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Families with children ages 6-10 are encouraged to attend this six-week program sponsored in part by Humanities Nebraska. A meal will be served, followed by reading together. Transportation is available; registration required.

Willa Cather Branch (Native American)

1905 S. 44th St. | 402.444.4851

Tuesdays | Sept 30-Nov 4 5:30-7 pm

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Saturdays | Oct 4-Nov 8 9 am-12:30 pm

omahalibrary.org

South Omaha Library (Bilingual)

2808 Q St. | 402.444.4850

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Omaha Magazine 5921 S. 118th Cir. Omaha, NE 68137

We were proud to participate in both the 2011 Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade and 2014 Capital One Bowl Halftime Show! Award Winning Competition Team

Professional Dance Education For All Ages! Jazz • Hip-Hop • Lyrical • Tap • Ballet • Pointe • Modern • Contemporary • Dance Theater We allow students to develop skills to their optimum potential while challenging them to achieve higher levels of dance education.

402.493.5671 • onpointedancecentre.com 1812 N. 120th Street, Omaha, Nebraska 68154