Varsity 2010

Varsity originally started as a challenge between the men’s rugby teams. Its primary aim was to raise money for charity but additionally, helped to fuel a healthy sporting rivalry between the university and the college (now University College).

The programme has since diversified to encompass as many sports as possible to see who the true sporting champions of Plymouth are. Last year saw more than 20 teams compete in over 10 sports over three days and this year it has grown to include sports such as Futsal.

Last year saw Marjon clinch the cup, however, this year we know we will perform and deliver convincing performances. This year we will shine! This year has been a good year for our teams with both development and results proving promising going into this year’s competition.

I have full confidence in every one of our teams to win both conviction and air.

A huge thanks goes to those we have worked extremely hard to make sure this event can happen, and made it the biggest and best year so far! Thanks to all the Clubs involved and you, the students for the massive support. A special thanks goes to the Varsity Committee.

Many thanks and please enjoy all the performances!

Chris Rees Vice President Sports

UOP LADiEs RUGBY - cAPTAiNs WORDs This year UPLRFC has become a whole new club. After a whole hearted effort by all the committee we have turned around our previous year of bad results and disappointment. The club have recruited new and experienced fresher’s which has changed and developed the club to produce performances we can all be proud of.

We have been working with Plymouth Albion to develop our club and to guide new players. I thank Ryan for all the effort he has put in, all the frustrating sessions and all the guidance he has given us not only throughout the year but for tonight. Additionally I thank Stevie, thank you for everything you have given us over the two years and hopefully your assistance will help with many of tonight’s decisions.

Tonight is the night we need to prove our worth, not just to ourselves but to everyone who is supporting us and has done so throughout the year. As a Captain I have so much more confidence in the team starting tonight then I have throughout the year. I am proud of all the commitment and effort each girl has put in; whether through the extra sessions, learning new positions or through their BUCS game performances. I hope tonight we can show Marjons that we are a new team, with a new style of play and can defiantly bring the win home this year! UPLRFC! Sarah Mimnagh UPLRFC Captain 2009-2010

UOP LADiEs RUGBY - PLAYER PROFiLEs 1. Charlie Reid – Charlie is an experienced front row who brings a fresh hit to any scrum, has a lot of power and is a demon with a crash ball. Always one to be down on her performance she has no need to be tonight as we will all be proud of her performance.

2. Megan Apsee – Last year’s Varsity hooker and in addition to that this year’s pack leader, Megan leads the pack from the front. She breaks lines, has a consistent throw in and will cause Marjon a lot of trouble in the scrum tonight.

3. Zoe Fisher – Starting last year Zoe looked set for a fantastic season however a broken ankle meant three months on the side line. However, she has worked her way back in to the number 3 shirt, has proved her fitness and has shown the form she had last year, good luck!

4. Hermione Fiebig – Another fresher who has come in and proved herself worthy of today’s shirt.

Hermione has shown her commitment to learning the game and has reflected her understanding on to the pitch. A demon in the lineout she will be defiantly spoiling Marjons fun today!

5. Charlotte Bedford – Charlotte has been with the club the longest and tonight is her final varsity with Plymouth University. She brings a big force in the scrum and has made a few appearances on the wing this year! Good luck tonight Bedford, go out with a bang!!

6. Helen Bonner-Smith – Bonner has played in all positions this year originally starting in the backs, dabbling in second row and has now found her element in the back row. With pace and good hands Bonner will be up and down the wing all night.

7. Sarah Mimnagh (c) – Bringing the most experience to the club, Sarah has proved to be a respectable captain on and off the pitch. Watch out for her hard tackles and fierce fighting ability. She’s going to bring Marjons down!

8. Jacqueline Fray – Jacqui’s experience in all back row positions will defiantly show tonight, whether at 8 or flank Jacqui has the ability to adapt. As a returner Jacqui holds the same fighting spirit as all returning old girls and is out to prove so tonight.

9. Alice Smith – An experienced fresher with a lot to give to the game. Alice’s pace, skill and ability to run lines has been an asset all season and will hopefully have the same impact tonight.

10. Sophie Balcombe – Another fresher who has come in with experience in the back line. Sophie has a strong presence on the pitch and will show that tonight. She reads, plays and controls the game in this position and will be giving the backs quick ball all night.

11. Amy Ghazala – New into the squad Amy has shown the pace and quick feet to start tonight. Over the past three months Amy has really settled in to the position and has had some brilliant performances in recent BUCS games. Let’s hope that performance continues tonight!

12. Kara Buckley – Kara is defiantly one to watch tonight, bringing experience from her previous University rugby career. Kara can read the game and make key decisions in whatever position she plays! She has been a real asset to the club this year and will show that on the pitch.

13. Sarah “Pink” Rice – Pink has a massive impact whatever position she plays, she has been a versatile player for us all year and that won’t change tonight. Pink’s speed and skill will help us in all aspects of the game; watch out for her in the lineout!

14. Helen Hazelwood – Helen was very quiet to begin with but in the past few months she has defiantly come out of her shell and on to the starting 15! She has strength to get past tackles and the pace to get to the try line; this fresher has got a promising three years ahead.

15. Niki Paton – Niki’s second year with the club has developed a whole new player, she is brimming with confidence and is relishing being at fullback. Niki has the boot, the hands and the experience to read the game and make important decisions that will stop Marjons over head attack.

16. Lucie Edwards – Lucie is a determined player with a hard tackle and ability for quick offload. Being a versatile player Lucie can play anywhere in the pack and tonight she will most defiantly get to prove that.

17. Kyna Dowson – Another fresher who came to the club very shy and timid; however she soon showed her true colours and has had some spectacular performances on the wing. Hopefully tonight she will be running past Marjons too.

18. Zoe Rodd – Zoe has used her experience this season to help aid the back row. A comfortable number 8 Zoe is versatile enough to play all back row positions and has had a few cameos in the backs.

Let’s hope her confidence and safe hands can help us to win tonight.

19. Danielle Gay – A fast back with a lot of potential, Danni has bought a burst of pace in all back line positions. Most suited to wing Danni has a lot of speed to offer to tonight’s game.

20. Gabrielle Kelsey – Gabby is new to the team this year and has made a massive impact to the scrum and forward play. Defiantly one to look out for tonight!

21. Hollie Fisher – Hollie Fish always brings a smile and enthusiasm to any training or game situation.

Her brilliant commitment level and ability to learn new skills has earned her a place in the squad tonight.

22. Carey Seymour – Carey has had a demanding few months however has always found the time for training and supporting the team. Another versatile forward she can play anywhere in the pack and has a sound knowledge of the game, good luck tonight!

UOP mENs RUGBY - cAPTAiNs WORDs What a year it’s been for the 1st XV this year. Losing only 2 games out of 15 and reaching the final of the Western Conference Cup after a nail biting semi final win against Bath 2s. I’d like to thank all the boys that have been involved with the 1st team this year. Their training and commitment has been outstanding.

Secondly I’d like to thank Danny Thomas who has given up so much of his time to work with us and has become very popular amongst the boys. The club will be extremely lucky if he was to carry on as coach for his 3rd successive year next year. I’d also like to thank Keni and Geoff from Albion who have worked hard alongside Danny throughout the year. The partnership between Albion and the uni has been a huge gain to the club this year and is one of the main reasons behind the whole club’s success. It has allowed to have more training of a much higher standard.

As always, there is a lot of hype about tonight’s game and the boys have been waiting and training for a long time. I’m sure both teams will do whatever it takes to be victorious tonight. Last year’s varsity made history in UPRFC and will be talked about for years as we won for the 1st time in 17 years! Having beaten the scum twice this year, that will be at the back of the boys’ minds as tonight will be a different game which will hopefully result in UPRFC winning their second 1st XV varsity in 18 years. I hope the uni crowd are as loud and energetic as they were last year and act as our 16th man.

Good luck tonight boys!

From your captain, Owain Lloyd.

UOP mENs RUGBY - PLAYER PROFiLEs Owain Lloyd (Captain) – Back row

Russ Morris – Prop A 3rd year student in his 1st hear of uni rugby, Russ has been a stand out player this year. His huge 19 stone+ frame can be destructive in the scrums as well as his trademark rampages in the loose.

Sam ‘Crunch’ White – Hooker, prop With his strange ‘lego man’ shaped body, Sam has been a consistent 1st team performer throughout the year, playing in his 2nd varsity, Crunch will need all of his aggressive power tonight and will hopefully smash some scum as he does best.

Paul ‘Creeky’ Creek – Prop One of the freshers in the squad, local boy Creeky has impressed throughout the year for uni and the Warriors. One of the standout freshers will need his superior scrummaging power tonight to earn himself a chance to get rat-assed for once!

Harry ‘Queen B’ Somers – 2nd row One of the most experienced players in the squad, playing in his 3rd and final varsity, Harry is the main man in the lineout. His large ‘beak’ nose helps his big mouth bark orders to motivate the team. It will be a good sign if Queeners wakes up in a wet bed tomorrow!

Olly ‘duck ass’ Yelland – 2nd row, no8 With the biggest arse in the club and his huge, underrated work rate, Yelland completes our experienced 2nd row, as he also plays in his 3rd varsity. Let’s hope Yelland will be drunker than his victim tonight.

Jon ‘Webby’ Webb – Back Row His age is unknown, but this South African terrior will be playing his 5th varsity tonight! The most experienced player in the squad adn last years player of the year has shone again this year and has kept one of the freshers of the year on the bench.

Rory ‘Albion’ Watts-Jones - Back Row Last year’s captain has had a successful year playing professionally with Plymouth Albion, which will be needed tonight. Let’s hope the Welshman makes up for lost time with the 1st team this year and stick’s it to the scum in his last varsity match.

Nick ‘Scarface’ Hill - Scrum Half Still only 1 or 2 boys know how he got his famous scars, which have inspired Woody to get his own. Scar has been like an extra flanker this year, earning well deserved MOTM awards. One of the season’s top try scorers will be needing all of his varsity experience to control his pack tonight.

Reece Whiting – Fly half/ scrum half Claims to have a goose step better than Serevi, which couldn’t even do a prop. Had to sit on the bench last year so will be raring to take his chance tonight. Tried his best to fill Filer’s role as the wildest man in the club. A solid 1st team player that bleeds UPRFC.

Will Sowden – Wing/ Centre This press-loving fresher and third wheel of Wi-Wi and Batten has had a very impressive season playing most of it in the centre. Won’t listen to the other boys and thinks his gloves look good. Will be on the wing tonight with his strong hand-off and tidy offload.

Jonner ‘stumpy’ Corellis – Centre/ Back row After a season out last year due to weight issues and mood swings, Jon has had a successful season like in his 1st year. The back rower has moved in to the centre to cover for the injured Lynchy and will be raring get over the try line tonight as he’s done several time this season.

Ross ‘computer geek’ Batten – Centre/ wing Albion player Ross and Willy’s other half loves to stir up the club’s website banter, and maybe a bit too much. This big, pacey centre completes a strong centre partnership and will be looking to perform well tonight as he did in last year’s varsity.

Willy ‘I’m sorry’ Gibbs – Wing/ full back Last year he was the club’s nicest, harmless boy. This year he’s not so nice. Likes to peer pressure freshers which recently lead to nearly fighting one, as well as nights in with his girlfriend. WiWi is a popular figure in the club and has put in a lot of work towards this year’s event.

Alex Jeffers – Full back/ scrum half This little man stands at barely over 5ft but punches far above his weight. All year he has made much bigger men look like fools whilst running round them or under them! One of the players of the season so far will be looking to claim the no9 jersey for next year and fight his way up the albion ranks.

UOP LADiEs FOOTBALL - cAPTAiNs WORDs Welcome to Varsity 2010, one of our biggest games of the season. This one is as much for the fans as for the players, who are all privileged to be named in the University of Plymouth Varsity squad. I hope we can go one step further than last year, where we suffered a slight 1-0 defeat to Marjon.

This season has been a promising one for UPLFC, we are pushing for promotion in the Sunday league, although we have struggled in the BUCS league. We have welcomed in some new freshers after losing the majority of the players from last season, Dani Smith, Andrea Hughes, Alice Brelsford, Cara Weessies and Karleigh Philpott both over for a year from Canada, Gemma Collins and Dani Avis. Sophie Cocks, despite being in her third year, is playing in her first season for us brings us a fresh new team hungry for success.

All of this has made it extremely difficult for my vice captain Sam Brass and I to select a squad.

I would like to thank our two coaches we’ve had this season, Leanne Griffiths and Lewis Thompson, both of whom have strived to improve our fitness, skill and overall game play, all of which will be put to the ultimate test by an opposition who I’m sure haven’t been idle over the last few months. I would also like to thank everyone in the sports office, notably Nadine, Nicola and Chris.

Lastly I would like to thank all my team mates for their continued committed this season and I hope we all enjoy a good performance, and a victory, this evening.

Sarah Bartlett University of Plymouth Ladies Football Varsity Captain 2010 www.sarahbartlett1.blogspot.com

UOP LADiEs FOOTBALL - PLAYER PROFiLEs Sophie (Cocksie) Cocks (GK) Loud and bubbly member of the team. She has been improving game by game. Allergic to alcohol but never says no to a slice of cake.

Chloe (Essex) Crawley (CB) Not your typical Essex bird a nifty defender not afraid to put in a crunching tackle. It’s advisable to stay on the right side of her as if you don’t you’ll certainly know about it!

Lisa (Left back Lopez) Mulholland (LB) Lisa likes to think she’s Irish but her Brummy accent tells us otherwise! She is a fierce left back with a wicked left foot who isn’t afraid to make a run down the wing.

Caitlin (Oh shit-it) Lower (CB/RB) An extremely diverse, competent and committed defender who has led the team to numerous victories as 2009/2010 captain. The two pint wonder of the team, she’s certainly a cheap night out! When she’s let out from being under the thumb ;)

Michelle (Mishmash) Rysdale (CM) After suffering from a torn ligament at the beginning of the season, Mish has given 100% effort to try and get her fitness back again for Varsity. Friendly and lively character who’s always up for a prank, so make sure your shorts are tied up because before you know it they’ll be down by your ankles.

Sarah (Barty) Bartlett (CB) (Captain) A strong player who plays in defence and midfield. Always plays with a smile on her face. Has been known to dabble in a few drinks after a game, as well as a few beef monster munch! A proud varsity captain.

“UPLFC!!”

Sam (Brasso) Brass (RM) (Vice Captain) A versatile player who has a cracking right foot that installs fear in any keeper with her long distant shots and well delivered crosses and corners. Always winning ‘dick of the day’ by pulling stunts such as kicking the ball in her own face and somehow always ends up on her rear end.

Emma (Chris) Chisholm (CM) A strong central attacking midfielder who isn’t afraid to test the keeper. She has a fantastic ability to pick out intelligent passes and always look like a threat. She is often running off back home to see her ‘professional’ footballer boyfriend.

Danielle (Baby) Smith (ST) One of the most dedicated freshers who attendance record must be nearing 100%. A competent striker who battles for every ball. When she’s drunk you better watch out because she’ll be windin’ n grindin’ you up on that dance floor!

Cara (Waldo) Weessies (LM/ST) Would maybe prefer to be playing futsal today but were happy that she’s turned up for she is a valued member of the team, credited with a few goals. Often to be found at the altar confessing her many sins.

Gemma (Bigmouth) Collins (RB) Claims to be deaf but we believe its selective hearing for she never misses a bit of gossip! A solid right back and a dedicated member of the team. No matter how far we travel we’re guaranteed to see her grans caravan.

Karleigh (Canada) Philpott (ST) Canadian international Karleigh has easily secured her spot on the Varsity squad this year. With continuous amounts of energy she never gives up. Wouldn’t meet a friendly girl.

Kate (Kat) Nicholls (LM) A speedy and extremely fit member of the team, fighting through her asthma without a pump she still manages to give continuous outstanding performances every week.

Alice (GA GA) Brelsford (CM) Tough season for Alice after the Plainmoor Beefcakes injured her with just over a month to go before Varsity! A solid midfield player who works well defensively and attacking.

Andrea (Dre) Hughes (CM) A player that can play in a range of positions, can control the ball better with her arse than her feet. A charismatic person with a bubbly personality who is fully committed to the team.

Dannielle (What’s occurrin’) Avis (LB/ST) Loud and enthusiastic member of the team, when she’s about you’ll know about it because you’ll hear her chanting Everton’s “and if yer know yer history, it’s enough to make yer heart go......”

Helen (Brown with an ‘e’) Browne (MID/ST) An attacking player, who will never stop running and chasing balls down.

Chatty and friendly player who always looks on the bright side of everything.

UOP mENs FOOTBALL - cAPTAiNs WORDs Varsity remains a massive occasion for both the players and the fans at the university. The intense rivalry is such that in previous years it has often come down to the wire. After being defeated last year on penalties the lads will be desperate to return the trophy where it belongs, by beating the local 6th form college.

It’s our first season back in the BUCS South Western 2A league, having started off very well, we are now still hunting for promotion. A good run in the BUCS cup saw us reach the quarterfinals where we were knocked out by Exeter 2nds. We’ve had a few ups and downs this season but things seem to be back on track and hopefully this will show on the night.

Our P and D Saturday form has also been consistent. Having lost only 4 games and causing some upsets in the league, we are looking to go on and win the league.

Playing consistently twice a week, and with additional training sessions in the run up to varsity, means that we are at the top of our game. The lads will be desperate to win the trophy for UPFC. A big thanks goes to our sponsors The Seymour arms, The Friendship Inn, The Clifton, Domino’s Pizza Mutley, UPSU and C103 for their continued support, and also a massive thanks to the legend that is Fred Binney. Last thanks go to the fans. Enjoy the game.

Daniel Alfano Il Capitano

UOP mENs FOOTBALL - PLAYER PROFiLEs 1. Fadi Saade – The oldest player in the squad. Fadi resembles Peter Kay from Max and Paddy and is constantly being ripped by Fred about his XL anatomy. During the summer months he trains with the middle eastern special forces in preparation for another season with the UPFC. When this man shouts everyone can hear it, however what he actually says is a mystery, therefore the majority of the squad just tend to nod to confirm the communication.

2. Robert “Bobby” Wakeham – Massive, fat, pasty eater turned right back... fingers crossed their winger is called Ginsters or doesn’t possess any real pace. He has a massive nose, which turns up half hour before he does. He weighs the equivalent of a baby blue whale and is as wide as he is tall. His rotund figure allows him to roll down the wing and overlap the wingers. Hobbies include going to McDonald’s and the occasional dog walk.

3. Joe “Noel” Wheadon – This recovering alcoholic has been in and out of rehab more times than Amy Winehouse and is constantly in the captain’s bad books. Looks like he’s have been dragged through a hedge backwards and could be classed as some sort of Martian.

His one-liners often have everyone in stitches, however the laugh is often at him rather than with him.

4. Darren “Rio” Coombs – Dear diary, vicious rumours have circled of young Darren writing love poems about his ex GF. Has vastly improved over the past season and will be looking to make an impact tonight. Can often be seen in Oceana surrounded by women, standing on his third leg! Serial womaniser who is definitely the longest in the shower girls beware.....

5. Jon “Rachael” Kelly – Has a well-fit sister, hope she’s here this evening. He’s a scabby scavenger always using other people’s possessions and generally living up to being a scouser. His new squeeze seems to have the claws in from day one and when he’s not applying just for men, he’s polishing her shoes and cleaning her house. Grey as Ravanelli, plays like Ravioli.

6. Mike “Sparrow” Long – The Emo of the squad. Loves listening to Slipknot and Scuzz... Does have a slight fancy for pastel coloured garments and does enjoy the occasional bottle of Vino Rosso. Has made his reputation for being one of the best players in the squad, the real reason is that he is the only one with a left foot. Has been an influential vice captain, playing in his 3rd Varsity game tonight.

7. David “Convict” Woodfield – Renowned for laying in front of the Marjon’s faithful while getting spat on and generally abused..... Wooder’s loved it!!! Outrageous comments often grace his vocal cords... “we know how to win, we know how to lose and we know how to draw!”, “we only win 3-2, we only win 3-2” and “this is a great song for a 2 -1 victory”. Also won an Oscar for his role as the foetus at Staddiscombe.

8. Daniel “That Bald Arrogant Bloke” Alfano – Captain Marvel loves controlling his troops in a similar fashion to Ferguson, when not acting out his disciplinarian regime, he can be seen on Mutley Plain whipping up a storm in Dominoes Pizza’s shop. Whilst on the pitch can be heard by dogs 100’s of miles away. Has the smallest willy in the team and persistently brags about this fact.

9. Andy “The Hitman” Cross – Can be seen tirelessly running from side to side on the pitch like a Trojan, some would compare him to a raging bull who has just been exposed to red. His manc accent lets you know he is upon you from a mile away and when he is not throwing glasses at his mates heads you can find him relaxing in the Seymour with a nice bottle of Newcastle brown ale. He is not a fan of ginger people, particularly when they tell his ex-girlfriend about his clubbing antics with the opposite sex.

10. James ‘Cowhead’ Cobley The bane of the 1st team’s life. He is constantly trying to bend the rules and never partakes in any activity he deems not worthy of his presence. You can spot Jim pony trotting around the centre circle and is entering the next summer Olympics for walking. His massive head often gets a part of the ball in the air and the ‘slap’ off his Massive head can be heard echoing around Bolitho Park this evening. Running for the most miserable human in Britain – turn that frown upside down and cheer up!

11. Gary “The Gary” Simmons – One of the loudest players in the squad literally never shuts up..... Has a lovely Bobby Charlton side parting, which sways with undoubted grace when he’s flying down the wing. Is deeply in love with a ‘special someone’ and has a tattoo on his backside of her glorious face. How he didn’t play first team last year remains a mystery.

13. Jake “Shaky” McClean – Jake was number 1 for us at the start of the year until we realised he was Jeremy Beadles love child with the same condition. Excellent shot stopper but comes off his line as often as a leap year.... Every time he has a goal kick, not only does it go nowhere near where he aims but he has an outburst of tourette’s. Generally a solid number 2.

14 Tommy “TA” Allen – Some would think that being called TA would represent the territorial army and that he was as hard as the proverbial nail, however TA really stands for “too many accidents”. He has been more injury prone in the past 2 years than Darren Anderton. To his credit, if there was an award for being most committed to the cause he would be up there. You will find TA at the bar with Rio in a dapper Jacket womanising, so next time your in the Union say “Hi Tommy”.

15. Ashley “Professor Clump” Liston – Arguably the quickest player in the squad, hence the name Speedy to his mates.

However, as well as leaving players behind him, he often leaves the ball. Often works a 90 hour shift in Cafe Sol when not playing football. Speedy is also one of the BANG crew and if you get in the way of his shot, on the rare occasion it is on target, then look out!

16. David “Bore Off” Watkins – Has to be one of the most exciting blokes on the circuit.... When he isn’t boring you to tears with his stories he can be seen in Pizza express with his exotic pallet, ordering a tap water and garlic bread, followed by a Margherita Pizza. Captain of team Bore-off that won the Dominoes cup by boring other sides into submission. When he gets the ball he looks like an excited jack Russell that wants to chase his own tail....

Pretty much the worst bloke ever!!!

20. Matt ”Ronald” McDonald – In Noel’s elite piss tank club, a frequent Cuba goer and can be seen in the early hours of most mornings dragging girls to his pit. Head like a 50p, foot like a Toblerone, and runs like Donald Duck there’s not much this kid can do!!!! However his outrageous antics and great enthusiasm guarantee his first team spot.

21. Jonny “The Goat” Elliott – Playing in his 46th Varsity and again probably won’t start. Gets his reputation for scoring goals all be it against Stevie Wonder’s XI. If you have ever had the pleasure of seeing Goater without his GHD’s to hand, he bares a striking resemblance to Side – Show Bob. When he’s not answering the phone to his bird 6,000,0000 times a day he can be found around local bins looking for food.... riff raff street rat I don’t buy that if only you’d look closer!!!!!

23. Misiu “Teddy Bear” Mylownowski – Misiu has been very inspirational this year turning up to at least 3 games.... to steal a phrase off of my good friend “he is wetter than an otters pocket”. Frequently bemoaning a heavy workload doing baked bean administration studies. No doubt he will have the local polish contingent this evening backing him to the hilt. Can try harder!

RUGBY AND FOOTBALL match officials

Rugby Ladies Rugby Referee: Rob Guy, Touch Judges: Richard Ronayne and Steve Pickup Mens Rugby 1st Referee: Richard Harding, Touch Judges: Ian Darcy and Lance Doggard

Football Ladies Referee: Barry Jackson Assistant: Andy Quin Assistant: Sam Littlefair 4th Official: Martin Leonard Men Referee: Adam Hopkins Assistant: Dave Harding Assistant: Dave Goard 4th Official: Martin Leonard Thanks to Ken Dobson and Trevor McDonald from the RFU and Ian Leonard from the Devon FA for all their help in allocating match officials throughout the year

The UCP Marjon Sports Federation and Marjon Student Union are delighted to see the amount of time and effort UCP Marjon Sports Clubs have put into their training for Varisty 2010 and raising money for their chosen charity. We hope that the all the fixtures will be competitive and provide an opportunity for the students to demonstrate their skill and technique to their supporters. UCP Marjon students have been really inspired this year to raise money for the Motor Neurone Disease Association in aid of Simon Adams a Marjon graduate diagnosed with the disease.

There are a host of other sporting events that are taking place as part of Varsity 2010 and UCP Marjon are pleased that many are taking place in its new three Sports Hall facility. We look forward to welcoming athletes and supporters to the campus.

We would also like to take the opportunity to thank Atlantic Intertial Systems, part of the Goodrich Corporation, for their continued support of student sport at UCP Marjon. The teams look great and ready for battle in their AIS sponosred kit.

All that remains to say is ‘Good luck UCP Marjon Spartans! Show them the Mighty ‘Jons can do it again! ‘

Kathryn Kearney, Student Sport Officer Nicky Primavesi, Student Union President

UcP mARJON LADiEs RUGBY - PLAYER PROFiLEs Mel Dent - (Timmy) has come on leaps and bounds this year which has shown through her starting

every game this year. She is a valued member of the team who is always committed and improves in every game she plays. She has bought plenty of humor to the team this year which has been needed at times. You can always rely on Mel to be there when you need help, especially when the rugby balls get forgotten!

Nadine Sheehan – Vice Captain to the team this year Nadine has stepped up, into the role and led the team extremely well. She is the pillar of the team in the front row, and always leads from the front .She is in every ruck, every maul and always at the front making huge tackles so the opposition don’t want to get up. Quite the joker off the pitch with her fancy dress outfits but please don’t try and confuse her she can be quite gullible. She will be fantastic next year.

Kerry Akerman – our token hockey player has shown huge commitment to this team, which has

earnt her this starting shirt. Watch your feet though girls, she can be slightly clumsy and there have been a few occasions were players have hopped away from training. This is her first varsity and I am sure she will be brilliant. Hopefully next year she can help the new freshers become just as committed.

Jessica Rudd – this is her first year playing but she has made a big impact to the team. You can tell she used to be a dancer with her girly screams and pointed toes when she is being lifted in the lineout.

However she has made some jaw dropping tackles this year and her commitment has been brilliant. This has shown through her playing with injuries. She has been a great player this year and we know will go on to be a valued member for the rest of her uni life.

Laura Kemp -

third year now for Kempo and she gets better every year, there’s not one game she hasn’t played in where she hasn’t come of the pitch blowing due to the amount of work she does in a game. Never one to shy away from a tackle, ruck or maul, Kempos work rate is high throughout the whole game and she is going to missed a lot next year. However don’t get on the wrong side of her, shes a fiesty one.

Beth Bromfield – this pint sized player has come crashing onto the scene with her hair extensions and make up. However don’t be fooled by the girly image as she is an animal on the pitch (and sometimes of the pitch as well)! Moving from volleyball to rugby half way through the season Beth has had a huge impact on the rugby pitch and will make a brilliant senior next year.

Gabby Stevens – this hotheaded player has enough aggression to go around the entire team. She

is a little rat in rucks, always stealing the ball and getting in people’s faces. This is her year of starting varsity and her experience shines through. When we talk about Marjons pride, we talk about Gabby, her speeches to the rest of the team can be guaranteed to make a few tears. One things for sure, she will her everything on the pitch today.

Megan Higgins – Captain of the Marjons Women’s rugby has been an inspiration to all this year, not only through the way she has led the team through every game by giving a 100% into everything she does and also through getting everyone socially involved which has bought the team together well this year. Her commitment to the team is unquestionable as she has been there for every game and every team member. An amazing player which everyone on the rugby team will agree... will NOT be forgotten.

Keira Keveth – this quiet, unsuspecting player has made huge improvements this year, and

stepped up to being a third year. Also an ex ballet dancer the quick feet can be seen when she has got that ball in her hands.

Juliet Short – this crazy northern lass is bound to impress the crowd this evening. Is she a back is she a forward? No one knows, but she can dump tackle anyone. Watch out for her tonight.

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UcP mARJON LADiEs RUGBY - PLAYER PROFiLEs Jenni Freeman – our very own SRS is always looking out for us. She is also a cheerleader, as you can imagine she gets quite a bit of stick for this. When Jeni gets on the pitch she gives it her all even though she sometimes doesn’t know where she is supposed to be. So on her behalf make sure the cheerleaders get huge support this evening!

Hayley Ifould – Hayley brings a smile to everyone’s face with her girly pig tails and funny comments. Stay away from the eyes though, this can make her angry. Her massive hits will make a big impact on the match today.

Rebecca Rowe - Third and final year for Becca, however she will not be forgotten. Becca is

known for her beastly tackles that leave players on the floor not coming back for more. Her ability to speed through the opposition while giving them one of her trade mark hand offs is comical and amazing to watch (you could say the same about her dance moves). She is a unit to the team and very passionate about the game and the girls which comes out when playing.

Yaz LH- This 3rd year has been a vital part of the team this year,

we have welcomed her back with open arms.always making her tackles and her passing is spot on! she may be small but gosh has she got a big mouth! She will be bossing the forwards round all night! Stay out those rucks Yaz!

Amy Cooper- This little fresher had big boots to fill and she has done so amazingly! She has impressed everyone with her decision making and her solid defence. She is our very own jack Russell and be sure to make some big tackles tonight, however will be sure to wrap her up in cotton wool first.

Charlie Wright- Another fresher starting line up this evening is our Charlie. She never gives up, al-

ways someone you can trust to be there when it counts. Her pace on the wing is just what Marjon need to put some points on the board tonight. Putting 100% into every thing she does she will be sure to shine tonight. This girl always tackles the biggest player on the pitch, sometimes she forgets how small she is, she always gets back up with a little smile and carries on.

Ellie Sewell- We have been lucky enough to steal her from the forwards this year and she is not going back. She has become a vital part of the back line this year with her storming runs and huge hits, sure tonight will be no exception as long as she remembers what position she is playing.

Vicki Smith- By far our craziest player. Its her first season playing but you would never know it, she has shown real talent and made this position her own, her tackling is going to destroy the opposition!

She will be sure to have fun tonight both on and off the pitch. She is CRAZY.

Kate Mock- The team aerobics instructor. Kate has been a solid player all year and always making those try saving tackles. Never moaning always smiling and always full of energy just what we need our very own Mrs Motivator. She has played most positions in the backs this season and we are sure she is going to be outstanding at 15 tonight.

Laura Vaughn- A late starter to rugby this year but she has made a big impact on the team, impressed by some of her big tackles despite her little frame. This girl has been thrown in at the deep end and always plays with the Marjon heart!

Leah Smith- We have missed Leah the second half of the season after making a great start to the year. She is off placement tonight and will be sure to make a big impact when she comes on!

Becky Cox-

Our senior. Becky’s 5th varsity tonight she is always there to turn to with a problem her experience and knowledge is so valuable to the team. She always makes every tackle and will probably shock everyone with her huge hits!

UcP mARJON mENs RUGBY - PLAYER PROFiLEs Niall Stokes – Niall ‘Chubbs’ Stokes is one of the most dedicated forwards you will meet. When he’s not training for the annual world hamburger-eating contest he’s pushing cars and small lorries in order to prove his scrummaging technique. Could the win today result in the colossal binge at 24 hour MacDonald’s lets wait and find out!!

Jason Stead – Coming back from a stressful year as captain, has had a great return. Maybe this is due to the Kung Foo Panda heading back east pre season for a massage or two. Let’s hope he has a happy ending tonight

Jack Miles – aka ‘the heartbreak kid’. After the success of his smash hit show ‘Gavin and Stacey’, Jack “Smithy” Miles, will be putting his head on the line. Lets hope he scores tonight because when a fat man scores you see a fat man dance, and we all know Smithy can do that.

Sam Roberts – Sam ‘Hooks’ Roberts this little Hobbit also known to have a microphone as a head and some terrible banter, if Aki, Jase and trips are playing Sam will always make an appearance. Get on short stuff.

James Creek – The animal, Mr. James Creek, has one of the best disciplinary records the club has ever seen, getting binned in every game but two that he wasn’t playing. When he is not smashing it up on the pitch, he is practicing his gymnastics in the ocean. Lets hope he can stay on the pitch long enough tonight to smash Plymouth Uni’.

Elliot Worrall – This reclusive fresher was first heard about after being a key feature by the famous novelist Smeagle as “punching above his weight.” Lets hope this continues tonight as he steps up against Plymouth Uni’.

Robert Heath – The vice-captain tonight, is easily recognized as the fluffy blonde headed Orc when running around the pitch. His fellow players will be looking for the Olympic torch to lead the way. The future MSU president’s campaign is on a knife-edge let’s hope he is a big hit tonight.

John Hiscock – This third year is making his first Varsity appearance for the first team. After three years at Uni someone must be looking over this one, lets hope he can hit the heavens in tonight’s game.

Charlie Grace – When not being the chief pot washer at Dan Forces pub, Charlie is surprisingly committed to the team this year though being hours late for everything else he is meant to be committed too.

Tom Sargent – Sarg wishes he went to private school and was a ‘rah’. When Tom isn’t crying about the 3 stone he’s put on since joining us in September, he apparently rips it up on the rugby pitch lets hope Tom doesn’t get cold feet tonight in the big game Adam Kevern – The captain tonight, Adam ‘AK’ Kevern, this big Cornishman keeps the Marjon Bakery alive, as he loves a good pasty. Although back in the day he still claims that he played on the wing, must have been along time ago. Lets hope he can lead from the front and cross the white wash like the good old days tonight.

Jamie Tripcony – When his car isn’t stuck behind a tractor or having to heard the chickens in, Trips sometimes attends training, Part of the coolest foursome to be in since JLS trips will only get ‘one shot’ tonight.

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UcP mARJON mENs RUGBY - PLAYER PROFiLEs Mike Kenney – Mike ‘Saffa’ Kenney UCP Marjons international talent, reared by a pack of lions through primary, cheetahs through secondary and rhinos through college, this fresher has all the qualities to beat Plymouth Uni’ James Scott – Scotty, there’s no train without smoke, and 40 a day fresher Scotty is defying science as he should have lost his lungs years ago, some say his mum changed his ashtray more than his nappy when he was a baby. Lets hope this fresher can make a big impact tonight.

Stephen Atkinson – Aki, Ivybridges finest, known for having better hair than Mark Owen, after being used as a body double on this years take that tour, if he isn’t chilling with Mark he’s getting owned on COD by his misses.

James Mepham – Known for the infamous mepham monthly mumble one liner has suffered from a serious illness all year, “Mephamsyndrome.” But has bounced back to be with us tonight. Our thoughts go out to him and his long-term girlfriend.

Oli Rayner – This pretty boy rugby player is looking to make it big time as a model, he had to rearrange one of his “paid” photo shoots to play tonight’s game. He will be easily recognized as the Michael Flatley impersonator dancing his way around the pitch not something he got taught at Hartbury. Lets hope his new attachment can leave his side for the full 80 minutes tonight.

Lewis Paterson – Our Scottish “exile” in more than one-way! Has been on top form on and off the pitch, playing recently in Belgium never seen without a little lady by his side. Hopefully will throw himself about tonight as he once said “My shirt will dry … !”

Max Venables – We hope Max makes it to the ground this year. Everything is looking hopeful as he has been practicing driving to the ground and getting changed, he calls it playing for Albion but we know he is practicing for us.

Steve Johns – Has found time to leave Mount Olympus as Marjon find Zeus in their starting line-up.

The walking quad muscle will be a big role in UCP UCP Marjons attack tonight.

Tobias Hayes – This pint sized fresher who is no stranger is the gym, cant help but constantly look at himself and tell everyone to ‘look how good he looks.’ But after recent conquests with a certain warrior, this fresher has nothing to shout about. He is still unsure of his true position, but were sure he can fill any shirt thrown at him today but only if it is a small ‘makes the guns look bigger’ (Hayes, 2009).

Douglas King – Dougies special order stash came in last minute, having the calfs of a 4 year old does not help those socks stay up. Doug said he is still expecting the same poor banter from the Plymouth Uni’ crowd when he is stood on the wing. Lets hope the professional in two sports can shut them up.

Ed Armah – The teams old boy, the OAP! Even in his old age, nothing can stop this retired sprinter from crossing that line for one last time. Lets hope he can find the energy to climb out of the zimmer frame and pull one out of the bag for us tonight.

Dan Force – This gym bunny, has been coaxed out for one final performance, for Marjon sake. Let’s hope all those dedicated hours in the gym can be put to good use tonight.

UcP mARJON LADiEs FOOTBALL - AshLEY sTAiNEs ( cOAch ) This season has been a rollercoaster ride that most will never forget. The girls have worked extremely hard and have done everything Jamie and I have asked of them. I would like to take this opportunity to say massive thank you to Jamie Smith for all his hard work this season. Narrowly missing out on promotion I’m sure it will be business as usual with the girls tonight giving nothing less than 100%. Well done girls! It’s been a pleasure coaching the girls this season and I wish them every success for next season.

‘I’LL SHOW YOU HOW GREAT I AM....’

cAPTAiNs WORDs Captains Words: A season full of highs and lows, mainly highs. We have had our best league finish for a couple of seasons finishing in 2nd place. We didn’t progress in the cup to a normal standard but overall a year of very good football (especially at home) and a season for us all to be proud of. I have been really proud to wear the Marjon armband all season and have put lots of effort into this role and hopefully I have done Captaincy and the girl’s justice. Marjon has provided me with 3 of the very best years and playing football for Jons is at the forefront of the highlights. I wish the girls all the best for the future and hope to be as actively involved as possible next year whilst doing my PGCE. I would like to take this opportunity to say a big thank you to Ashley, Jamie and David (Face) for their hard work and support all season. (As the great Vinnie Jones would say ‘it’s been a emotional!’)

A big thank you to everyone involved with the 24 hour cycle-a-thon and all the people that sponsored us and donated to this year’s Varsity Charity Motor Neurones Disease (Simon Adams), we raised an impressive £1250.00. (Special thanks to Emily Field for coordinating the event)

UcP mARJON LADiEs FOOTBALL - PLAYER PROFiLEs Number 1- Michaela Phillips Club Team- Plymouth Argyle, Position- Goalkeeper (English Universities Trialist) Best trainer: Quickest player: The joker: Most skilful: Biggest Moaner: Hard woman: Lightweight: Best MLFC moment: Coaches’ words: Been fantastic all season, a great pair of hands and the voice from the back, defenders know when they’re not doing their job!

Number 2-Chelsea Easton (Vice club captain) Club team- Plymouth Argyle, Position- centre-back Best trainer: Nai Quickest player: Smudge The joker: Kimberley Most skilful: Jodie Newark Biggest Moaner: Emily on the pitch! Hard woman: Sam Drewery, kicking the ball in the Spanish girls face when she was mouthing off, priceless!!! Lightweight: Kim Best MLFC moment: so many, probz geek night when Kim told the guy to get out and have more respect for himself! Classic! (Sam sausage moment! ha-ha) Coaches’ words: Pocket rocket! Fantastic pace and been our saving grace on more than one occasion, will be sorely missed next season.

Number 3- Emily Field (Fundraising Co-ordinator) Club Team- Cullumpton LFC, Position-fullback Best trainer: Leanne Quickest player: Smudge The joker: Kim Most skilful: Network Biggest Moaner: Stace Hard woman: Channelle Lightweight: Leanne Best MLFC moment: UWIC home win, MOTM + hitting the bar.

Coaches’ Words: Passion by the bucket load, versatile player with all the attributes to do well in the game, 2nd varsity for Em and I’m sure she won’t disappoint.

Number 4- Sarah Smith aka Smudge Club team- Totnes LFC, Position- fullback Best trainer: Emily Quickest player: Chelsea The joker: Kim Most skilful: Jodie N Biggest Moaner: Michaela (only on the pitch) Hard woman: Sam (even though she does injure herself by skipping) Lightweight: Lobby Best MLFC moment: When Lindsey stood up to Chels ‘you still owe us some hours cycling’!! (I admit, I don’t remember the exact wording!! lol) This followed Chelsea fining Lindsey for lateness!

Coaches’ Words: A great player with frightening pace and a lethal left foot, I have every faith that Sarah will go on to do great things in the game, determined, hard working, and always giving everything, been a major figure for us this season.

Number 5- Kimberley Eke (vice captain) aka P.Scuff Club team- Saltash LFC, Position- winger Best Trainer: Jodz N Quickest player: Chelsea Most skilled: Batch The joker: Linds Biggest moaner: Chelsea Hard woman: piggy Lightweight: Jodie Lobb Best moment: gotta be ‘you’re on my foot fat shit!!!’

Coaches’ Words: Plenty of experience as this is Kim’s third varsity, fantastic left foot that can do damage from anywhere on the pitch.

Number 6- Leanne Cording Club team- Plymouth Marjon, Position- centre midfield (English Universities Trialist) Best trainer: Nai Quickest player: Smudge The joker: Kim Most skilful: Network Biggest Moaner: Michaela (on the pitch!) Hard woman: Pidge-keep doing your pull ups! Lightweight: Jodie Lobb-this is the witch, what? Best MLFC moment: Lindsey answering back 2 Chels Coaches’ Words: Attitude is every bit as important as ability and Leanne is a perfect example of that, she’s been fantastic all season and I’m sure she will do well tonight.

Number 7- Jodie Newark (Team and club captain) aka Network Club team- Plymouth Marjon, Position-winger (English Universities Trialist) Best trainer: Leanne, Emily, Nai oh & Lobby @ futsal (my usual conciseness!) Quickest player: Chels + Smudge The joker: Kim (P.scuff) Most skilful: Batch + Sam Biggest Moaner: Naomi (aka Kevin) + Stace (on the pitch) Hard woman: Pidge (Oh my nose!) Lightweight: Kim ‘Guaranteed home before midnight’ Eke Best MLFC moment: Raising £1250 for MND on our team 24 hour cycle-a-thon. Whooping Gloucestershire 4-1 at home in style!

Coaches’ Words: Captain Marvel! Jodie has been outstanding on and off the field all season long and has commanded the respect of the dressing room all season, a perfect example of how a captain should be!

Number 8- Sam Drewery (Social Secretary) Club team- Saltash LFC, Position- centre midfield/centre-back Best trainer: Lindsey Quickest player: Chelsea ‘Maurice’ Easton The joker: Naomi (to look at �) Most skilful: Jodie ‘Cruyff’ Newark Biggest Moaner: Chelsea ‘Maurice’ Easton Hard woman: Hannah ‘Gym’ Dingwall Lightweight: Kim ‘I can’t drink’ Eke Best MLFC moment: Helium balloon talk in the mini bus � Coaches’ Words: Sam’s 2nd varsity, I have no doubt Sam will go far in the game, she has been a major asset all season and will be a power of strength next season.

Number 9- Naomi Smith Club team- Plymouth Marjon, position-Striker Best trainer: Emily Quickest player: Chels The joker: Kim Most skilful: Network Biggest Moaner: Stacey Hard woman: Channelle Lightweight: Dings Best MLFC moment: Speaker phone in the services!!

Coaches’ Words: From this season Nai has shown that it is never too late to try new things, a change of position has seen her flourish into a fantastic player and a constant threat, every centre half’s worst nightmare.

UcP mARJON LADiEs FOOTBALL - PLAYER PROFiLEs Number 10- Natalie Batchelor aka Batch Club team- Plymouth Marjon, position-Striker (English Universities Trialist) Best trainer: Leanne Quickest player: Chelsea The joker: Kim Most skilful: Jodz N Biggest Moaner: Nai Hard woman: Emily Lightweight: Pidge Best MLFC moment: Lindsey and Chelsea comment Coaches’ Words: A fresher who has exploded onto the scene this year and made big statements being our top goal scorer and laid the foundations to be a Marjon great.

Number 11- Stacey Tonkin Club team- Newquay LFC, Position- centre midfield Quickest player: Chels The joker: Kim Most skilful: Pidge Biggest Moaner: Emily Hard woman: Smudge Lightweight: prob me Coaches’ Words: A wand of a left foot and determination like no other, Stace is another who will no doubt lead by example tonight.

Becky Parkyn

Club team-Plymouth Marjon, position-defender Best trainer: Nai Quickest player: Chels The joker: Kim Most skilful: Jodie N/Batch Biggest Moaner: Michaela on the pitch Hard woman: Emily Lightweight: Kim (geek night!) Best MLFC moment: Lindsey answering back to Chels!

Coaches’ Words: Becky has been a lively addition to the squad this season. A genuine hard working girl, who has been a pleasure to coach.

Emma Tucker No current club team, position- full back Coaches’ Words: A newcomer to the game this year with a fantastic attitude, I have no doubt that if Emma keeps working she will see more football next season.

Hannah Dingwall aka Pidge No current club team, position- winger Best trainer: Leanne Quickest player: Smudge The joker: Kim Most skilful: Batch Biggest Moaner: Emily Hard woman: Me!!! I have the guns! Lightweight: would say me, but I vote Kim Best MLFC moment: ??? too many!

Coaches’ Words: A big character that always puts a smile on everyone’s face’s every time she’s around, definitely the joker of the pack and a fitness fanatic.

Jodie Lobb aka Lobby Club Team- Saltash LFC, position-winger Quickest player: Chels The joker: Kim Most skilful: Jodie Biggest Moaner: Nai Hard woman: Emily Lightweight: Kimmy Best MLFC moment: Lindz back chat to chels!!!

Coaches’ Words: Jodie has been a model of professionalism this season, called upon on several occasions and always given everything, another one for the future.

Lindsey Harris No current club team, position- winger Best trainer: Emily takes it pretty serious LOL Quickest player: Batch The joker: Kim Most skilful: Jodie Newark Biggest Moaner: Chelsea ha-ha Hard woman: Channelle Lightweight: Maybe Sam? Let’s see after her birthday Night out! Best MLFC moment: Winning Matches Coaches’ Words: Lindsey has been fantastic all season, improved vast amounts all season and I’m sure will be fighting for a starting spot next season.

Nikki Caunce No current club team, position- Defence Best trainer: Nai Quickest player: Smudge The joker: Kim Biggest Moaner: Emily on the pitch Hard woman: Pidge Lightweight: Lobby Coaches’ words: Nikki joined us later on in the season and had been a good addition to the squad; she has fantastic determination and is always looking to improve.

Zara Turner No current club team, position- Defence Coaches’ words: Rock solid centre half with a calm head when under pressure, a fantastic fresher and I’m sure she will have a fantastic career at Marjon.

Channelle Whyton (Futsal Squad only) Club team- Weymouth LFC, position-Midfield Quickest player: Chels The joker: Linds Most skilful: Jodie N Biggest Moaner: Naomi Hard woman: Emily Lightweight: Lobby Best MLFC moment: ‘U r on my foot fat shit!’

Coaches’ Words: A strong centre midfielder with plenty of fighting spirit, I’m sure Channelle has bright future with the club.

Nicola Pike (Futsal Squad only) aka Pikey No current club team, position, Goalkeeper Best trainer: Nai Quickest player: Chels The joker: Kim Most skilful: Jodz N Hard woman: Emily Lightweight: Lobby Coaches’ Words: Nikki is a big character and someone who instantly lights up the room, full of energy and one for the future.

Give to Sport is a Networking Tool and a Virtual Information Centre for Plymouth and the Peninsular.

Give to Sport hopes to make sports volunteering easy and aims to increase the number of qualified and recognised individuals in sport in Plymouth and the region. Give to Sport additionally aims to be an informative hub of sports knowledge and information for aspiring coaches and athletes.

How can I get involved? Give to Sport is FREE to join and members receive a weekly e-newsletter alerting them to paid, voluntary and development opportunities in the area. To register enter ‘Give to Sport’ on the UCP Marjon website www.ucpmarjon.ac.uk and follow the online instructions. If you are a member of an organisation who would like to publicise a volunteering or paid opportunity, or promote a coaching course or sport and leisure related workshop to Give to Sport members please email dhickson@marjon.ac.uk for more information. There is no charge for placing an advert.

UcP mARJON mENs FOOTBALL - cAPTAiNs WORDs Good evening ladies and gents and thank you for coming along and supporting the football club this evening. Not really sure where we should start but here goes. We started the season full of optimism, as on paper we had potentially the best side in Marjon’s recent past. However, results on the pitch didn’t go are way, queue the hard luck story. This in our eyes is down to bad referring, individual errors, not getting the run of the ball and the lack of ruthlessness in front of goal. We’re sure you guys have heard this all before, mostly on a Wednesday night but this was aimed for those who didn’t know. Off the pitch we have becoming a tight knitted group that pretty much does everything together and we have all become good friends. So for many of us, this is are last game together and for UCP Marjon itself, so after the finial whistle don’t be surprise to see a few hard earned tears from the boys.

We are unbeaten in the fixture for a few years now and we aim to maintain the winning sequence tonight.

As Plymouth Uni were in our league this year and we’ve played each other twice already, we know what to expect, so there shouldn’t be any surprises. We’re looking forward to hearing you people in high spirits and all singing from the UCP Marjon song book and at the finial whistle, we fully expect the team to be joining you in the celebrations.

Unfortunately our coach Garth Long is unable to attended tonight’s game, so on behalf of the football club we would like to give a massive thanks to Longy for all the hard work he has put in this year and I’m sure we’d be lost without him.

Thanks Aidan & Luke

UcP mARJON mENs FOOTBALL - PLAYER PROFiLEs Luke Purnell (Captain)- Man of the match in last years Varsity and is possibly the best keeper around in the university circuit. Has unbelievable shot stopping ability and with his great kicking teckkers, has been know to assist goals throughout the year. Self proclaim hard man of the squad but is know to be a hopeless romantic, who isn’t short of a cheesy chat up line. Luke has had another wonderful season and I wouldn’t be surprised if he were to receive sportsman of the year for a second year running.

Aidan Dodd (joint captain) - On his last year of an intense child care course hoping to leave UCP Marjons with a successful varsity. Aidan has been known within the team to have the most camp dress sense. This year it’s been lovely to see Aidan’s commitment socially has improved however the banter he produces is still below par.

Liam Jones- This has been Liam’s first season with the club and he had made the full back position his own. Does all is talking on the pitch and is known as the silent assassin. Loves getting forward and joining the attack at any opportunity and has ability to run with the ball and beat players at ease.

Mark Halse- This is Halsey’s third Varsity appearance and he is yet to come out on the losing side. Took a scoring penalty in last year shoot out and his experience is going to be vital for tonight’s game. I know it may be a shock to many of you to find out that Mark is a third year, and not a fresher but that’s a story for another day…

Josh Fenwick- This is Big Time, sorry I meant Fenners first season with the club and he has made a massive impact with the boys. Never short of a word or two and often referees to himself as “The Boi”.

Josh has had great first season on the pitch with his tough tacking and no nonsense defending and is very strong in the air.

Dave Asbury- Dave came into the squad in the second part of the season, due to being on placement and with his return, the result on the pitch have improved. Strong in the air and loves to play out of defence, Asbury has become a key member of the side and always believes, regardless of the score, his side should of won the game. This is Dave’s second Varsity game, after being apart of the last years winning side.

Nick Dwyer- Dwyer has been a very important member of the club on and off the pitch. On the pitch, Nick has been called upon to play varies positions throughout the season and hasn’t let himself down once. Off the pitch, Dwyer has had the important role of social secretary and hasn’t let himself down in that department either. He loves to inform the boys of the fact of the day and is never short of a story or two.

Ryan McClements- Skills has been a massive hit with the lads this year with his ability to embarrass the best of us in training with the outrageous skills he has at his disposal and the capability to pull off nutmegs, when it seems vitally impossible to do so. Is very similar to a certain Dennis Bergkamp, in regards to Ryan isn’t a fan of travelling to away games. I know personally that Ryan has been looking forward to this game all year, as he sees it as his stage to perform.

Chris Yeatman- Fortunately Varsity lies on a Wednesday one of few nights he’s not timetabled in with his girl friend. Not blessed with good looks, our ex captain stands out like a sore thumb on the pitch due to his Rodney Trotter frame and gangly approach to football.

Phil Stokes- If the game is won tonight the team have luckily been promised that a round of drinks will be purchased once again on his card by his lovely girlfriend at Oceana, Phil has also promised to where his famous socks out if the result is right.

Ross Presley- Fortunately UCP Marjon is located on the coast where Ross was able to dock his ship.

Hopefully with a win tonight the lads can go out and have a good night and Ross may be able to leave a yellow, wet surprise in a random girls bed.

Ben Lowes- Ben is the John Terry of the team (not because his ability on the pitch but because his behaviour off the pitch) making him very lucky to make the cut this evening, however his constant very keen approach at training has influenced his place.

Kev Lawrence - A successful student at UCP UCP Marjons coming to the end of his PGCE. Kev is seen in the football club as a target man and is a different outlet during a game. Were lucky to have Kevin in the squad this year there have been rumours of the basketball squad approaching him on numerous occasions throughout his time at UCP Marjons.

Lewis Edwards- a new face in the squad who has finally made the step up from the YT system at Argyle to the UCP Marjons first team, we hope he doesn’t crack under the pressure. Another lucky player who has been thankfully granted permission by his girlfriend to be involved tonight.

UcP mARJON mENs FOOTBALL - PLAYER PROFiLEs Lewis Edwards- a new face in the squad who has finally made the step up from the YT system at Argyle to the UCP Marjons first team, we hope he doesn’t crack under the pressure. Another lucky player who has been thankfully granted permission by his girlfriend to be involved tonight.

Ian Stonebridge- One of the less talented players in the squad however due to his maturity he always provides some wise words of wisdom through out a game. We hope his performance will be slightly better than his debut against the scum we have decided to forget his penalty miss and judo trip. However Ian himself will be holding a 30 minute book signing after the game promoting his successful book ‘Stone Over the Bridge.’

Chris Black- The quire boy scores goals, FACT! `nananananananana, we’ve got chrissy black… chrissy black, weve got chrissy black.` Luckily his housemates’ behaviours have not brushed off on to Chris, Chris is just as dedicated as any member of the squad. Hopefully a win is on the cards as Chris has promised a song at Oceana, we all look forward to ‘Angels’ Chris.

Matt Larcombe- Matt has had a good string of games in the first team this year unlike his twin (vice captain of the 2`s) . He is one of few in the football team that are planning to undergo marriage, matt sees his team mates as his closest and a successful stag do was completed on a away journey.

Ben Deacon (Head coach) – Our mature student Ben Deacon is a sly member of the squad and can never be left alone with women. Thankfully the Royle Family is not filming at the moment as Ben plays a key role playing the part of Baby David. Unable to play the game convincingly Ben has taken a backseat and adopted a coaching role, lets hope his tactics pay off in tonight’s fixture.

Chris Coombs (water boy) – Chris has a very important role in tonight’s game, keeping the players hydrated with high quality H20. His lack of good looks and whit are sure made up by his ability to provide a good service to the squad, and the fellow team members appreciate his input. Our water boy is keen to be sitting on the Plymouth Uni side this year with his big wooden spoon stirring the pot.

FiXTUREs WEDNESDAY 10TH MARCH Swimming Waterpolo Men

2000 - 2130 2130 - 2200

Central Park Central Park

Waterpolo Women

2100 - 2200

Central Park

THURSDAY 11TH MARCH MONDAY 15TH MARCH Rugby Men 2 Rugby Women Rugby Men

12:00 - 13:30 18:00 - 19:30 19:45 - 21:15

TUESDAY 16TH MARCH Tennis Basketball Men 1 Mixed Lacrosse Futsal Women Futsal Men

10:00 - 16:00 16:00 - 17:30 16:45 - 18:00 18:00 - 19:30 19:30 - 21:00

Plymouth Albion RFC Plymouth Albion RFC Plymouth Albion RFC Devonshire UCP Marjon Show Court UCP Marjon Astro UCP Marjon Sports Hall UCP Marjon Sports Hall

WEDNESDAY 17TH MARCH Badminton Lacrosse Women Lacrosse Men Hockey Women Hockey Men Football Men 2 Football Men 3 Basketball Men 2 Netball 3 Netball 2 Netball 1 Basketball Women Football Women Football Men 1

09:30 - 11:30 10:30 - 11:45 12:30 - 14:00 14:00 - 15:30 15:30 - 17:00 12:00 - 14:00 14:00 - 16:00 12:00 - 13:30 13:45 - 14:55 15:00 - 16:10 16:15 - 17:25 16:00 - 17:30 17:30 - 19:00 19:30 - 21:00

UCP Marjon Sports Hall UCP Marjon Astro UCP Marjon Astro UCP Marjon Astro UCP Marjon Astro UCP Marjon F/ball Pitch UCP Marjon F/ball Pitch UCP Marjon Sports Hall UCP Marjon Sports Hall UCP Marjon Sports Hall UCP Marjon Sports Hall UCP Marjon Sports Hall Plymouth Parkway FC Plymouth Parkway FC