OHbaby! magazine ISSUE 43 - Born to Flourish issue

IT TAKES A VILLAGE

Help & hope in our community

fLOUR IS H YOUR WELLBEING CREATES WELL BEINGS HOW BABY EXPERIENCES BIRTH | BREASTFEEDING | SUPERFOODS

MAKING CONNECTIONS TO OUR WIDER WORLD Making connections to people, places and things help children build fundamental ideas about the world they live in and how they belong/connect to it. – M.O.E., 2017 If you open a gate, you open a chance to explore, a chance to be part of something different; your world is suddenly bigger.

At Bear Park, we enter a wider world of wonder and adventure where we can chase our curiosities further and make connections.

The connections we build with our wider world help us develop a sense of who we are in this world, where we belong in it, and most importantly, a healthy relationship with the earth so we can honour and care for it.

www.BEARPARK.co.nz 147 XXXXXX

MAKING CONNECTIONS TO OUR WIDER WORLD Making connections to people, places and things help children build fundamental ideas about the world they live in and how they belong/connect to it. – M.O.E., 2017 If you open a gate, you open a chance to explore, a chance to be part of something different; your world is suddenly bigger.

At Bear Park, we enter a wider world of wonder and adventure where we can chase our curiosities further and make connections.

The connections we build with our wider world help us develop a sense of who we are in this world, where we belong in it, and most importantly, a healthy relationship with the earth so we can honour and care for it.

www.BEARPARK.co.nz 147 XXXXXX

Our family is always t here for yours.

With 130 childcare centres across New Zealand, we have a centre that suits your desired outcomes.

Each centre has a distinct learning philosophy and approach – talk to us today about your specific interests or needs.

MAKING CONNECTIONS TO OUR WIDER WORLD Contact us today

Making connections to people, places and things help on 09 32 77 children build222 fundamental ideas about the world they live in and how they belong/connect to it. – M.O.E., 2017 If you open a gate, you open a chance to explore, a chance to be part of something different; your world is suddenly bigger.

At Bear Park, we enter a wider world of wonder and adventure where we can chase our curiosities further and make connections.

The connections we build with our wider world help us develop a sense of who we are in this world, where we belong in it, and most importantly, a healthy relationship with the earth so we can honour and care for it.

www.BEARPARK.co.nz Montessori lives here

Innovation lives here

147 here Exploration lives

Community lives here

Wonder lives here

littleearth.co.nz

pascalselc.co.nz

XXXXXX activeexplorers.co.nz

learningadventures.co.nz

littlewonders.nz

Our family is always t here for yours.

With 130 childcare centres across New Zealand, we have a centre that suits your desired outcomes.

Each centre has a distinct learning philosophy and approach – talk to us today about your specific interests or needs.

MAKING CONNECTIONS TO OUR WIDER WORLD Contact us today

Making connections to people, places and things help on 09 32 77 children build222 fundamental ideas about the world they live in and how they belong/connect to it. – M.O.E., 2017 If you open a gate, you open a chance to explore, a chance to be part of something different; your world is suddenly bigger.

At Bear Park, we enter a wider world of wonder and adventure where we can chase our curiosities further and make connections.

The connections we build with our wider world help us develop a sense of who we are in this world, where we belong in it, and most importantly, a healthy relationship with the earth so we can honour and care for it.

www.BEARPARK.co.nz Montessori Nature lives liveshere here lollipopseducare.co.nz littleearth.co.nz

147 here Innovation All our centres livesuse here Storypark Exploration to engage lives XXXXXX our families in their child’s development pascalselc.co.nz activeexplorers.co.nz

Community lives here Wonder lives here The joy of learning lives here learningadventures.co.nz littlewonders.nz

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6 CONTENTS

t n o C ent s FAMILY 20 26 28 34

Profile: at home with the Noels Adventures in nature The gut revolution Travelling with a toddler

MAMA-TO-BE 41 42 46 52

Collected for mama-to-be An LMC answers FAQs Nursery set-up: luxuries & essentials Breastfeeding basics

BABY 57 58 64 68 72 76 78

Collected for baby How a baby experiences birth Baby's first day When to call the doctor Burping and beyond Do we need a baby carrier?

Road tripping with Dad

KIDS 81 Collected for kids 82 Stop and wonder 86 A toast to superfoods 92 Fashion: spring into nature 102 Party: a cowgirl's celebration

MAMA 107 Collected for mama 108 Perinatal depression 114 Short story: going the distance 116 Exercise at home 120 Fashion: join the resurgence

HOME 128 Craft: fungi family 130 Interiors: a bohemian bedroom 134 Safety in the home

IN EVERY ISSUE

120 7 CONTENTS

10 Small talk 16 Online community 19 Colour therapy: green with envy 138 Subscription prize 140 Competitions 141 Directory 146 Memory keeping

Publisher Angela Pedersen, angela@ohbaby.co.nz | Editor Pippa Henderson, pippa@ohbaby.co.nz | Art Director Jaimee Clapham Designers Emma Norton, Lisa Smith | Sub Editors Ellie Gwilliam and Christine Stride | Advertising Sales Manager Suzie Finnigan, suzie@ohbaby.co.n | Directory Sales Lucretia Kemp, lucretia@ohbaby.co.nz | Administration Kelly Fraser, info@ohbaby.co.nz Proofreader Nola Estcourt | Subscriptions Manager Miranda McDermott | Printer PMP | Distributor Gordon & Gotch Published by OHbaby! Limited | Phone (09) 376 1778 | Website ohbaby.co.nz | Email magazine@ohbaby.co.nz Contributing Writers Dr Abby Baskett | Talia Blake | Gretchen Carroll | Abbe Cherry | Audrey Fitzjohn | Hannah Gentile | Colin Gruetzmacher Miriam McCaleb | Grace Nixon | Alice Parminter | Dr Emma Parry | Dr Anne Tait | Sarah Tennant | Renée Vincent | Dorothy Waide Dr Nick Walker | Jeremy Wyn-Harris Photography Jaimee Clapham | Lavara O’Hanlon | Emily Raffills | Cassie Salemme | iStockphoto

ON THE COVER: Devon at two weeks old, wearing Nature Baby.

Captured by Jaimee Clapham, pixelsandlight.co.nz In loving memory of big sister Summer.

Copyright © 2018 OHbaby! Limited. OHbaby! Magazine is registered with the National Library (ISSN 1178-6515).

OHbaby! Magazine and www.ohbaby.co.nz are wholly owned by OHbaby! Limited. No other parties or individuals have any financial interest in the company or in OHbaby! Magazine or ohbaby.co.nz. OHbaby! Magazine contains general information only and does not purport to be a substitute for health and parenting advice. All reasonable care is taken in the preparation of this magazine and its contents but the publisher, editor and authors cannot be held legally responsible for errors in the content of this magazine or any loss arising from such errors. Readers are advised to see a doctor or health professional for all medical or health matters. The publisher, editor and authors do not accept any liability whatsoever in respect of action taken by readers in reliance on the recommendations set out in this magazine. Opinions expressed or information given in this magazine should never replace medical advice. This magazine intends to provide general information on a subject or particular subjects and is not an exhaustive treatment of such subject(s). Accordingly, the information in this magazine is not intended to constitute any legal, consultative or other professional advice, service or contract in any way. OHbaby! Magazine is subject to copyright in its entirety. The publisher’s written consent must be obtained before any part of this publication may be reproduced in any form whatsoever, including photocopiers and information retrieval systems. All rights are reserved in material accepted for publication, unless initially specified otherwise. All letters and other material forwarded to this magazine will be assumed for publication unless clearly labelled “NOT FOR PUBLICATION”. No responsibility is accepted for unsolicited material. All reasonable efforts have been made to trace copyright holders. Published by OHbaby! Limited PO Box 80081, Green Bay, Auckland 0643.

What’s normal when it comes to

BREASTFEEDING FREQUENCY? Becoming confident with breastfeeding takes time.

Here are a few helpful tips to look at what’s “normal” when it comes to breastfeeding

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tudies show that around 95 per cent of women can produce enough milk for their baby/ babies. Breasts are amazing as they work on a supply-and-demand system. Each time your baby breastfeeds, a message is sent to your brain to ensure you produce this feed again. When you send enough signals, your body makes enough milk. So, how many times a day should a baby feed?

A recent study looked at breastfeeding babies who were one to six months old and it revealed that there are big differences in how often babies feed.

• Babies feed between four and 13 times every 24 hours • Babies drink between 54ml and 234ml at each feed • Babies drink, on average, 800ml per day • Two-thirds of babies feed at night up until they’re six months of age Imagine you and I are breastfeeding our babies. My breasts hold 80ml of milk at each feed, while yours holds 130ml. Both our babies drink 800ml per day, so whose baby will breastfeed more frequently?

Mine! My baby needs to feed about 10 times compared to your baby who feeds six times.

How do I know my baby is getting enough?

• Listen to your gut instinct – is your baby mostly happy and content?

• Do you have to change at least five heavily wet and at least two dirty nappies daily?

• Does your baby settle after feeds (most babies need some help settling down first)?

• Is your baby gaining weight well?

• Is your baby otherwise healthy?

If you’ve answered ‘Yes’, you have a great milk supply. Keep doing what you’re doing. If you’ve answered ‘No’, visit your health nurse or lactation consultant – they can look at how you and baby are feeding and offer advice.

For more information on breastfeeding visit www.medela.co.nz or call us on 0800 503 553 to find your nearest stockist.

Hello!

EDITOR’S PHOTO: JAIMEE CLAPHAM

W

ellbeing is the theme of this issue. I love mulling over words, so I’ll say it again. Wellbeing.

It’s such a good, honest compound word that means exactly what it says, and it’s one of those things in life that you just can’t put a price tag on – even though many would empty their bank accounts in exchange for it. Wellbeing is all we really want for Christmas, our birthday and Mother’s Day (as much as we love mugs with too-cute messages that come off in the dishwasher). And when it comes to our kids, wellbeing sums up everything we really want for them.

They say it’s all about balance, but that reminds me of walking along a beam, concentrating on my feet, getting the wobbles and toppling off, and I think wellbeing is less introspective and more communal than that. These days my aim is to keep my chin up and eyes open, broadening my view to include friends and family, as our wellbeing is all intricately linked. I reckon we can trust our instincts to know when a friend needs help, but we should never shy away from actually asking that all-important question – of

Behind the scenes at our spring fashion shoots

ourselves, and of others – are you okay? Are you really okay? Parenting isn’t an easy ride, and it can’t be said enough that we all need a community of support around us. We expand on the concept of ‘it takes a village’ on page 20.

If it’s help for your little one you’re after, check out our experts’ articles on winding issues, and when to call the doctor, in our baby section.

We also look into the wonder of probiotics on page 28, and the power of superfoods on page 86. For mamas and mamas-to-be, we cover the basics of breastfeeding and home workouts, and share one brave woman’s story about her battle with perinatal depression – that’s on page 108. Whatever stage of parenting you’re at, or whatever internal season you’re going through, I hope there’s something in this spring issue that brings you one step closer to saying ‘it is well with my soul’.

Arohanui,

OHbaby! EDITOR

S mall tal k

ECO-FRIENDLY FROM THE BOTTOM UP Shocked at the amount of dirty nappies that filled their wheelie bin each week, Kiwi parents Semisi and Tahlia Hutchison were compelled to create an earth-friendly disposable option. The Little & Brave Eco Nappy combines the sustainability of cloth with the convenience of disposable nappies. Made up of two parts, the fully compostable nappy pad snugly fits inside a washable, reusable fabric wrap or nappy pant. To ensure that the nappies are composted, Little & Brave offers a $48 Drop & Collect service where fresh nappies are dropped off and used nappies are taken to a dedicated commercial composting facility in Auckland.

Eco Nappy single pack of 26 nappies, $20, and Snap Wrap, $10, littleandbrave.co.nz.

SUPPORTING BEREAVED PARENTS You can support Baby Loss Awareness Week (9-15 October) by buying one of these beautiful pins from Sands New Zealand. During the week, bereaved parents, their families and friends unite with each other and others across the world to commemorate the lives of babies who died during pregnancy, at or soon after birth, and in infancy. $7.50 from sands.org.nz.

THANKYOU FOR SHOPPING

When you buy a Thankyou product, the effects are far reaching – these guys commit 100% of their profits to helping end global poverty. We’re loving the hand and body washes, hand lotion and sanitiser, and the coffee body scrub, and we’re looking forward to the soon-to-be released baby range which will include nappies as well as baby bath and skincare products. Thankyou products are available at selected supermarkets.

Find out more at thankyou.co/nz.

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pure organic essentials a soft touch I’m made from 100% organic cotton, for extra softness and comfort for your little one.

IN BLOOM

Linden Leaves is welcoming spring with its newest In Bloom fragrance, Aqua Lily. It’s a sophisticated uplifting fragrance with fresh top notes of citrus and pear, layered over a soft bouquet of marine, green florals and lily. Made with love in New Zealand from the highest quality ingredients, it has no sulphates, parabens or silicones, and is suitable for vegans and sensitive skin. Priced from $9.99 at leading pharmacies, gift and department stores, and lindenleaves.com.

SPORTSWEAR FOR ACTIVE MAMAS

Nursing mamas need all the support they can get, especially when keeping fit. With this in mind, mum-of-four Nikki Clarke created Cadenshae activewear for nursing mums – maternity sportswear that doesn’t look like maternity sportswear. The Cadenshae Fit2Feed nursing sports bras have become her top-selling item, and Nikki receives regular feedback from satisfied customers around the world. By the way, the gorgeous blonde model is none other than Nikki herself! To check out her full range, or for advice on which bra is best for you, visit cadenshae.co.nz.

durable & easy care I’m machine washable, all natural and chemical free, making me durable and long lasting.

SIP, STROLL, SUSTAIN

Sip your take-away coffee in style, knowing that you’re helping to feed and clothe needy Kiwi babies, and save the planet. These reusable cups from Cuppacoffeecup feature designs by Libby and Ben of The Creative Agency (and former winners of The Block), and all proceeds from their sale go to Raise A Bundle, a Plunket-endorsed charity.

Choose from two designs at plunketcup.com.

designed with love A soft envelope neck for easy dressing, and snap domes to keep little backs and tummies warm.

BEST MOSES BASKET

BEST B A BY BEDDING

P R O V I D I N G A W O R L D T H AT N U R T U R E S YO U A N D YO U R B A B Y N A T U R A L LY

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www.naturebaby.co.nz

JOHN CAMPBELL: WHAT’S IT LIKE BEING A MUM?

JACINDA ARDERN:

ALL OF THE THINGS PEOPLE SAID THAT I’D EXPERIENCE – THAT IDEA THAT YOU SUDDENLY HAVE THIS NEW PERSON IN YOUR LIFE THAT YOU COULDN’T BELIEVE THAT YOU COULD

LOVE SO MUCH!

FIND YOUR FRAGRANCE, MAMA

AND THAT TIME WILL GO INCREDIBLY QUICKLY, BUT THE

Organic children’s brand Gray Label and natural perfume house Abel Odor have teamed up to produce a 100% natural eau de parfum for new and expectant mothers. The brands’ founders, Emily Gray and Frances Shoemack, both mothers, wanted to offer a fragrance that inspired a feeling of peace.

They designed Nurture, a soft and calming fragrance “that reminds a mother to take care of herself while also taking care of her little one” says Gray. Created by French perfumer Fanny Grau, Nurture contains calming rose, energising orange blossom, ginger for its anti-nausea properties and sandalwood for grounding. RRP$125 for 30ml from selected department and boutique stores, and abelodor.com.

NIGHTS WILL STILL SEEM INCREDIBLY LONG - ALL OF THAT HAS BEEN TRUE,

INTERVIEW ON RNZ’S CHECKPOINT, 2 AUGUST, 2018.

FOR THAT OMG MOMENT When you’re TTC, you want to know ASAP! The First Response Pregnancy Test is sensitive enough to detect pregnancy hormone six days sooner than the day of your missed period – earlier than most other pregnancy tests on the market. The sooner you know, the sooner you can start looking after yourself and your baby. Available from pharmacies and supermarkets. RRP$12.99.

SIMPLY ESSENTIAL

REDISCOVER YOUR CORE

The delicate skin on your baby’s bottom needs a lot of TLC. Curash Babycare Simply Water baby wipes contain 99% water, and help to protect against nappy rash. They also clean up mess quickly and easily, so are great to have in the bathroom, the car or in your handbag. They come in a handy pop-up container so you can have a free hand to keep hold of your little one.

RRP$6.99, from pharmacies and online.

Postnatal rehab specialist Simone de Cunha has created a six-week online programme centred on helping mamas rediscover their core strength.

Her innovative Mum to the Core (MTTC ) programme combines elements from Pilates, yoga, functional conditioning techniques and abdominal reconstruction specific to the needs of a new mum. MTTC deals to those delightful conditions we mothers find ourselves facing postbirth, such as mummy tummy, laterstage incontinence and back, neck and shoulder pain. mumtothecore.com.

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LOVE YOUR SKIN, NATURALLY

Just six weeks to improved skin tone, hydration and elasticity? Yes, please! Natural Instinct’s products are completely free of harmful chemicals and will deliver proven results in six weeks. They’re formulated with the finest plant-derived ingredients, certified organic extracts and pure essential oils. We love the sound of the awardwinning Dark Circle and Wrinkle Correction Eye Crème, the Skin Refining Cleansing Oil, the Plump and Renew Serum and the Skin Radiance Moisturiser. The full range of Natural Instinct face care is now available at Countdown supermarkets nationwide.

GROWING OUR LITTLE NATIVES To celebrate PM Jacinda Ardern’s new arrival, Neve, conservation charity Trees That Count has launched Trees for Kiwi Babies, a gifting registry to acknowledge the birth of every Kiwi baby born in 2018.

Donations will go toward community native-tree planting projects to be planted during Matariki 2019. Trees That Count aims to plant 200 million new native trees over the next 10 years, and by doing so, significantly contribute to NZ’s climate change goals. Donate to celebrate Neve, or a baby special to you. Go to treesthatcount.co.nz/treesforbabies.

SAFE AND SECURE

We can’t predict earthquakes, but we can prepare for them, and one of the best places to start is your home. Visit the EQC website today and learn what steps you can take to keep you and your whānau more safe and secure. You’ll find helpful tips and advice on essential safety precautions such as securing tall furniture, checking your chimneys and foundations, and how well your type of home might stand up to an earthquake. For more information, visit eqc.govt.nz/prepare.

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NEW ON THE BOOKSHELF

Have you tried sewing with Merino?

It’s perfect for wraps, sleep sacks and clothing for little ones.

Super soft, hypoallergenic & machine washable. Available in loads of beautiful colours & weights at amazing prices.

Visit thefabricstore.blog to get inspired!

Recipes for Messy Play, Cathy Sheppard, RRP$19.99, New Shoots Publishing Time to stock up on more baking soda and glitter! This colourful book is an updated spin on the extensive range of hands-on, experimental play activities born in our Playcentres during the 1970s. Research suggests that messy play greatly helps a child’s development in numerous ways, including motor skills, language development, scientific thinking and problem solving.

Maddie’s First Day, Penny Matthews, RRP$27.99, Walker Books It’s Maddie’s first day of school and she has everything ready, but there’s one special thing that she can’t leave behind – her blankie! In Maddie’s First Day, award-winning author Penny Matthews captures the excitement of going to ‘big’ school for the first time. A lovely book to read with your big little preschooler.

Sports Are Fantastic Fun! written and illustrated by Ole Könnecke, RRP$35, Gecko Press The hippo with a pole vault racing across the cover sets the quirky tone for Ole Könnecke’s latest book. You and your little sports fan will find lots to learn and lots to laugh at in this wonderfully witty yet informative tribute to all the different sports and activities we can do.

Könnecke includes all the popular sports – rugby’s there – as well as ballet, and some offbeat activities such as the caber toss, slacklining and axe-throwing.

www.thefabricstore.co.nz @wearethefabricstore

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Adhesive Dressings with Medical Grade Antibacterial Manuka Honey

View the full range of MedihoneyÂŽ products at comvita.co.nz. Also available from leading pharmacies and natural health stores.

Always read the label. Use only as directed.

If symptoms persist, consult your healthcare professional.

Comvita, Te Puke, New Zealand. TAPS NA9460.

No children were harmed in the making of this ad.

Available from pharmacies, supermarkets and Baby City Stores nationwide USL Consumer toll free 0800 658 814 or Email us at enquires@uslmedical.co.nz or visit www.uslconsumer.co.nz

PREGNANCY • BABY • UNDER 5 • PARENTING • LIFESTYLE • COMMUNITY • FOOD • PARTIES • DIRECTORY • WIN • MAGAZINE

CAN YOU OBLIGE? Pregnant mamas, here’s your chance to help improve the induction experience for future Kiwi mamas-to-be. The OBLIGE Study aims to find out which ways of starting labour are more likely to result in a vaginal birth, and which one women prefer.

Women who trial the Foley ball (balloon catheter) can go home until their labour starts, while those trialling the prostaglandin hormone gel will stay in hospital. Lead by University of Auckland’s Dr Michelle Wise, the study involves eight New Zealand hospitals.

Check out our web article for more details and how to be involved: ohbaby.co.nz/community/this-just-in/pregnant-women-to-trialinduction-methods/.

Health and Wellbeing SPEcial

STAY WELL, MAMA

DON’T WORRY, BE HAPPY

HOORAY FOR HERBS!

Mama blogger Rebekah Hoeft regularly writes for the OHbaby! website and for her Facebook page, SimplySix, about family life and wellbeing for new mamas and mamas-to-be. Find Rebekah’s latest article Why it’s okay to NOT be okay, at ohbaby. co.nz/parenting/health-and-wellbeing/.

Having a baby can bring up a number of worries, and for many new parents, the advice above is easier said than done. Read counsellor and mum Michelle Parkinson’s article on ways to overcome your anxiety and step closer to peace at ohbaby.co.nz/ parenting/for-you-mama/.

You can choose to use herbal remedies over pharmaceuticals for those aches and pains of pregnancy. Qualified herbalist Leah Dooley shares her advice on safe and effective herbal help for pregnant and breastfeeding mums at ohbaby.co.nz/ pregnancy/health-and-wellbeing/.

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17 ONLINE

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MAKING CONNECTIONS TO OUR WIDER WORLD Making connections to people, places and things help children build fundamental ideas about the world they live in and how they belong/connect to it. – M.O.E., 2017

® M ER INO KI D S the natural choice

If you open a gate, you open a The connections we build chance to explore, a chance to with our wider world help us be part of something different; develop a sense of who we are your world is suddenly bigger. in this world, where we belong ® with the world’s sleep offering;athe award-winning Go Go Bag®. We AtMerino Bear Kids Park, was we born enterina2003 wider in it,first andnatural most importantly, have set standard foradventure safe sleep, workinghealthy with paediatric specialists ensure all our products encourage safe, world ofthe wonder and relationship withtothe comfortable sleep using only the very best, ethically sourced 100% superfine merino and organic cotton. where we can chase our curiosities earth so we can honour and further make connections. care it. recommended’ by New Zealand parents and are proven to Our rangeand of heirloom quality products are voted thefor ‘most

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PIPPA HENDERSON POPS IN FOR A CUPCAKE AND A CATCH - UP WITH THE NOEL FAMILY – A MOTHER AND DAUGHTER DUO LIVING TO HONOUR OTHERS.

E

OHbaby! Magazine shared an earlier chapter of the Noel family’s story in 2014, when Elise was a tiny baby. To recap, Hannah and Jared had been married for 11 months when he was diagnosed with metastatic bowel cancer, at the age of 28. Initially they weren’t sure if they’d have a family, or even be able to, but Jared responded well to treatment, and after a period of stability, they went ahead with IVF treatment and became pregnant. They knew it was highly possible that Jared wouldn’t be around for all of their daughter’s childhood, but during the pregnancy his disease progressed more quickly than expected, and they weren’t sure he’d make it to her birth. Incredible generosity from friends and strangers via a Givealittle campaign helped fund treatment with the drug Avastin, which stabilised his disease for a time. Jared was well at Elise’s birth and for her first few months, but sadly he lost his battle when Elise was eight months old.

Four years later, Hannah and Elise light candles and visit ‘Daddy’s garden’ at the cemetery on special occasions.

Together they bake a cake on Jared’s birthday and spend significant dates with family and close friends. But Hannah also tries to talk about Jared with Elise every day. “He is a part of our daily conversation, and I hope he will always remain so.”

lise Noel is four, and “more-than-a-half”. She puts a lot of weight on that fraction. It reminds me of how people approaching forty insist they’re only mid-to-late-thirties, but Elise is actually correct. She’ll be five in January, and can’t wait to go to school. She can already write her name – with a perfectly formed capital ‘E’ and the last ‘e’ in lower case.

She’s a bright, articulate, engaging and adventurous little girl who brings a lot of joy to those who know her. She loves ‘helping’ activities, like baking and gardening, as well as swimming, riding her bike, and hanging upside down on a trapeze. When she grows up she wants to be a ballerina – at the moment. Being four (and more-thana-half) it’s her prerogative to change her dreams with the seasons, and her family and friends look forward to her next idea with interest.

Elise also loves reading, just like her mum, Hannah, and her late father, Jared. A treasured part of Hannah and Elise’s day is snuggling up together with a book. They’re currently reading Charlotte’s Web, a favourite from Hannah’s own childhood, but they also dip in and out of some of the wonderful children’s books Hannah has discovered that help explain grief and loss in a way that children can understand.

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SHARING THE LOAD Single-parent families are common in New Zealand – at least one in five Kiwi kids live in a single-parent home. Hannah points out that, while the pathways to single parenthood are diverse, the challenges are similar: a single income, complexities of childcare, coping with the fatigue of parenting alone, and worrying about your child/children missing out. “I’m not an expert in parenting, but here is what I know: children are hardwired for love and belonging, and every child needs a safe and secure attachment

“EVERY CHILD NEEDS A SAFE AND SECURE ATTACHMENT TO ONE PRIMARY CAREGIVER TO THRIVE. BUT PARENTING IS THE HARDEST JOB, AND I THINK A SINGLE PARENT NEEDS A ‘VILLAGE’ OF KINDNESS, NON-JUDGEMENT AND SUPPORT.” to one primary caregiver to thrive. But parenting is the hardest job, and I think a single parent needs a ‘village’ of kindness, nonjudgement and support around them. There are many ways to be a good-enough parent, no one does it perfectly all the time, and it’s important not to feel alone!”

Hannah and Elise’s village comprises Elise’s devoted grandparents, aunts and uncles, their friends, their faith community (Mosaic Morningside), and their ‘Rainbow’ whanau –

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CELEBRATE YOUR CHILD.

reflect on the privilege IT IS TO BE A PARENT.

Elise’s daycare teachers and peers. Hannah is truly grateful to all of them for their love, support, childcare (both for when she works and when she needs a break) and the way they provide a sounding board for the hardest parenting dilemmas. “Importantly, they also tell Elise about what Jared was like” says Hannah, “his endearing, funny and quirky qualities, and stories of his life that help her build a picture of him, as she doesn’t have her own memories. People need permission to share those things – as a society, we’re not very good at talking freely about those we have lost.”

within the neighbourhood. Together, we decided that it would work really well for both families to share a house. Financially it would be easier, and living intentionally within our community would mean that Elise and I would be less isolated. We could share childcare and school drop-offs and pick-ups, and Elise could stay in her own bed when I am on late shifts and overnight call.”

The dream has become a reality. Hannah recently bought a beautiful five-bedroom villa with Nigel and Cathie Cottle – who were amongst Jared’s closest friends before Hannah and Jared met. The villa is now home to Hannah and Elise, Nigel and Cathie, and their three daughters (Anais, 17, Portia, 15, and Trelise, 7). “The living arrangement is a bit outside the norm for New Zealand – as a society, we’re very attached to the concept of one family per house – but this is working for us.” The two families are already in the process of giving the house a fresh lick of paint, and are discussing renovations to make the best use of their space.

The location of their new home is ideal. It’s not far from ‘Crave’ – a neighbourhood cafe that the Noels and the Cottles part-own as members of the Crave collective. The collective is all about making the community a better place to live, and the Noel family are super excited to be living closer to the action. Especially in time for Elise to start school, because as you’ll recall, Elise is four and morethan-a-half.

THE PEOPLE IN YOUR NEIGHBOURHOOD Hannah is a full-time paediatrician, working Monday to Friday with some evening, weekend and on-call shifts. Despite the high demands of this job, she’s passionate about what she does, as was Jared. He was also a doctor, they met during their medical studies.

“I love caring for children and their families” shares Hannah.

“I love that I learn something new every day, and I love that I get to work with an incredible team of health professionals who work so hard to make a difference for these children.”

Meanwhile, Elise goes to childcare on-site at the hospital.

Hannah is grateful for the amazing teachers and the way Elise is known, loved and nurtured in that environment. “Sometimes if I get caught with a sick child or something I need to finish at the end of a day, I collect Elise and bring her back to the ward where the nurses spoil her with iceblocks and stickers. She loves it!”

But Elise approaching school-age has meant that Hannah has needed to reconsider the best way to manage family life and childcare going forward. “About a year ago I was ready to move back to Morningside and be settled before Elise goes to school, and some close friends, the Cottles, were also contemplating a move

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OHbaby!: How do you create the support network you need?

Hannah: By inviting people into your life, accepting love and support, and learning to ask for help. It sounds simple, but I still find asking for help really hard.

(or podcast/TED talk) and cup of tea in the evenings, escaping outdoors with Elise on her bike in the weekend, and having a quiet wine with friends while the kids play. Elise occasionally spends a week with my parents in Dunedin, which she adores – and an occasional break from parenting is also good for my soul!

I did a mindful parenting course through the Parenting Place which I found so helpful. And I see an amazing counsellor who is helping me process my grief, rediscover joy and meaning in the simple things, and trouble-shoot parenting dilemmas. My faith remains an important anchor, and I keep a gratitude journal to remind myself I have so much to be thankful for. Jared and I both love the Bible verse from Micah (6:8) about acting justly, loving mercy and walking humbly. To simplify it for a four-year-old, we talk a lot about being kind and generous to everyone, especially those less fortunate than us. We do our best to appreciate the small things in life. This reflects Jared’s legacy for Elise.

OHbaby!: Aside from ‘village’ support, what else can help single parents cope?

Hannah: Having realistic expectations and self-compassion is paramount. Counselling is also valuable to help process your own experiences and emotions, so that you’re more present and available for your children. We need to actively manage stress with what works for us personally, be that exercise, mindfulness or company. Other keys include established and dependable routines (especially with young children), seeking and accepting help, and having some time-out from parenting now and then. I’m also grateful for a compassionate and flexible working environment. At the end of the day, a sense of humour is essential, as is celebrating your child’s awesomeness and reflecting on what a privilege it is to be a parent.

•

To read more about the Noel family and Jared’s wishes for his daughter, check out his book, Message to My Girl: A Dying Father’s Powerful Legacy of Hope. You can also find their previous feature story at ohbaby.co.nz/parenting/.

OHbaby!: How do you look after yourself?

Hannah: True to my introverted self, I need to get away from the world to recharge. I love nothing better than tucking up with a book

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PHOTOGRAPHY: EMILY RAFFILLS, POINTANDSHOOT.CO.NZ

Word s oF wisdom

A CHANGE OF SEASON MEANS THE END OF HIBERNATION. GRETCHEN CARROLL SENDS US OUTSIDE TO EXPLORE.

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WHERE TO GO New Zealand has many beautiful environments, regardless of whether you live in the city or the countryside. Even the cities have native bush to explore, beaches, and local playgrounds with trees for shade and climbing. If you’re feeling adventurous and want to go on a day trip, visit one of the wildlife sanctuaries or national parks, or find a bush walk or beach somewhere you wouldn’t usually go. For ideas, visit doc.govt.nz/parks-and-recreation.

Of course, your backyard or a family member’s garden are great places for children to explore, and going there usually needs no planning other than giving your little adventurers some containers for collecting any interesting treasures.

he arrival of spring – and hopefully better weather – is the perfect opportunity to get outside with little ones. Being in nature has many positives for children. It promotes healthy growth of their mind, body and spirit, stimulating all their senses, and instils a love of the outdoors.

A day in nature is a cheap, easy and enjoyable way to spark kids’ imaginations, and can do wonders for parents’ wellbeing too! Getting into the outdoors doesn’t have to mean going far afield, it can be as simple as playing in the garden or local green space.

Just remember the essentials for our country’s changeable weather with warm and waterproof clothing, and the allimportant snacks if heading outside the garden gate.

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WHAT TO DO The most important thing is to slow down as much as possible and to take your time. It’s great to have some ideas about what your child might like to do in the outdoors, but it’s just as important to let them have unstructured play and some adventures of their own creation.

Here are some activity ideas which will no doubt spark many more plans for adventures.

Talk about the different names of the plants, birds and insects you discover. To help with this, borrow a book or two from the library to take with you, or look at the books afterwards at home and talk about what everyone saw.

Hunt out various textures and colours in nature. Have a scavenger hunt, for example, where the children find five green (or smooth or nice-smelling...) things.

Talk about the sounds that can be heard and what each sound might be.

Collect materials for art or simply for the child to treasure, such as shells, leaves, stones and sticks. Fallen leaves are perfect for art projects. Take them home, then put them underneath a piece of blank paper and rub a crayon over them to create a picture.

Experiment with other materials too.

Create ‘land art’ while you’re out. Help children collect some materials to then make a picture, for example, a smiley face on the sand.

Most children love birds, so try bird watching. Binoculars are not essential, but try to borrow a pair if you don’t have any, as they can make bird watching much more fun. Even in city parks and gardens, you can see native species such as kereru (wood pigeons), tui, piwakawaka (fantails) and kingfishers close by.

In your own garden, go on a bug hunt and see what the kids can find. You can make your garden more insect- and lizard-friendly by leaving piles of wood, stones or bricks and leaf litter around.

These make good hiding spots for creepy crawlies and kids will have a great time hunting around to find them.

You might have enough garden space for your child to build a hut out of sticks or branches (possibly with help), and then let their imagination run wild as they play in it.

Kids love to be involved in composting or looking after a worm farm, which has the added benefits of providing nutrients for the garden and is a good way to get rid of food scraps. When planting in the garden, let your children help, and talk through what you’re doing and why.

If you don’t have a garden, kids can still be involved in setting up some pot plants or microgreens. Microgreens are easy and grow quickly. Microgreen seeds and small plastic ‘greenhouse’

“IT’S GREAT TO HAVE SOME IDEAS ABOUT WHAT YOUR CHILD MIGHT LIKE TO DO IN THE OUTDOORS, BUT IT’S JUST AS IMPORTANT TO LET THEM HAVE UNSTRUCTURED PLAY AND SOME ADVENTURES OF THEIR OWN CREATION.” containers are available at garden centres. Fill some smaller containers with soil and sprinkle seeds in these, water, then place in the larger container. It won’t take long to see the results, which is handy for young children.

CONSIDER THE CONSEQUENCES While in the outdoors, it’s worth emphasising how important it is to show the environment respect. Remind children to only take things that have fallen to the forest floor, such as leaves and sticks; to not disturb birds or bird nests in use; to replace rocks after looking underneath them for insects; and to take home any rubbish they have.

GOING THE EXTRA MILE It’s really as simple as getting into the outdoors in a way that suits your family, as often as possible. But if you’re keen to ensure regularity, some areas host nature playgroups that meet outdoors for a weekly session.

For more resources, visit your local library for books on New Zealand plants, birds and insects, and on children and the outdoors. You can also check out these helpful websites: Department of Conservation, doc.govt.nz Kiwi Conservation Club is the kids’ section of Forest and Bird, kcc.org.nz UK-based organisation Woodland Trust has some great activity ideas categorised by age group on their website woodlandtrust.org.uk/naturedetectives/

•

Gretchen Carroll lives in Auckland with her husband and young son. She works as a freelance writer, which gives her more time for family adventures in the great outdoors.

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DR EMMA PARRY OFFERS AN UPDATE ON THE GUT REVOLUTION, AND SHARES WHY SHE’S PRO PROBIOTICS.

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ou would have to have been hiding under a rock to have missed the fact that gut health is big news. So what’s it all about? In this article I’ll outline what we know about the microbiome, why it is important for gut and wider health, how to keep it healthy and when a probiotic can be helpful.

The gut is the tube which runs from the mouth all the way to the anus, and its main function is to break down and absorb nutrients. (See image one: gut anatomy.)

The main area for absorption is the small intestine, which is a long narrow muscular tube coiled up in the abdomen. The small intestine has a very complex internal surface when viewed under a microscope.

(See image two: gut microscopy.) Made up of a series of mountains and valleys, its surface area is very large. On the lining surface, as well as cells for absorption of food, it has cells involved in immunity, hormone production and cells which produce neuro-transmitters (particles that stimulate nerves).

THE GUT-BRAIN AXIS: FOOD FOR THOUGHT The gut is actually the largest sensory organ in the body. It’s often called the second brain, as it contains many nerves in the gut wall. The nerves transmit either from the gut to the brain, or from the brain back to the gut.

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The nerves that travel to the gut from the brain control the muscles in the gut wall that propel the food along. A case in point is what often happens to your gut when you’re nervous. The stress created by an exam, for example, leads to increased firing of the nerves to the gut, which then leads to the awful cramps and diarrhoea that many people suffer from when under pressure.

So where do the nerves that start off in the gut end up in the brain? Research shows that these nerves travel to a number of areas which control such things as self-awareness, morality, fear, emotion, memory, motivation and ‘gut feeling’.

So, the concept of the gut-brain axis is just that. The recognition that there

is a complex and intimate connection between our gut and our brain.

Back to the lining of the gut. On the surface of these lining cells is a layer called the microbiome. This is bacteria encased in a slimy substance called a biofilm. These are usually the ‘good bacteria’ that help to ensure the cells of the bowel wall are healthy and protected from ‘bad bacteria’ and the substances these might release. When bad bacteria are predominant on the surface of the bowel lining, this can lead to inflammation and affect the function of the cells which make up the lining.

Given the lining contains cells involved in food absorption, immunity, hormone production and nerve signalling, it becomes clearer as to why gut health is so important.

TAKING CARE OF YOUR GUT So how do we get a healthy gut, and in particular, a healthy set of bacteria or microbiome? One easy way is to incorporate foods into your diet which will contain these bacteria and/or encourage the growth of good bacteria.

Step in, fermented foods.

Yoghurt is the most commonly consumed fermented food. Yoghurt is

made from milk fermented with bacteria.

Most commonly, lactic acid bacteria and bifido bacteria are utilised. However, not all yoghurts contain live bacteria so it’s important to check the label.

Sauerkraut and kimchi consist of fermented cabbage and vegetables, and hail from Eastern Europe and Korea respectively. They’re now often sold in supermarkets and health food stores and will keep well in the fridge. Like yoghurt, it’s important to check that they contain live bacteria, as some are pasteurised (which will destroy the bacteria).

Kefir, originally from Turkey, is an increasingly popular milk-based drink, and starter powder and kits are now available.

The kefir grains (which consist of lactic acid bacteria) are added to cow’s or goat’s milk. The flavour can be enhanced by adding fruit syrups, such as blackberry.

Kombucha is a fermented tea drink with live bacteria, originally from Asia. It’s promoted widely but there is less evidence of a benefit than some of the other options.

For those who aren’t keen on any of these options, probiotics come into the equation. A probiotic is a supplement containing a selection of bacterial strains considered to be beneficial. Not all probiotics are the same though. The type

of strains are important, as some strains are more useful for some conditions than others. Also, some strains have more research for specific situations behind them than others.

PROBIOTICS FOR MOTHERS For expectant mothers, having a healthy microbiome is important for a number of reasons. For a mum’s gut health and comfort (think bloating, cramping and constipation), a healthy microbiome is vital. Also, research carried out recently at the University of Auckland suggests that the effect on mood could also be valuable, which makes sense when you consider the fact that gut cells include cells which affect nerve firing, and the important mood areas in the brain the nerves link to. In this study women took either a placebo or a probiotic called lactobacillus rhamnosus.

The women having the probiotic scored better on depression scores. Further research is planned here. Research is also ongoing in the area of gestational diabetes, pre-eclampsia (high blood pressure in pregnancy) and preterm labour. These studies will give us more information on whether probiotics are useful for prevention or reduction of Intestinal wall

Oesophagus

Trachea

Villi

Heart

Lungs

Stomach

Liver Gall Bladder Kidneys Duodenum

Spleen Pancreas

Villus Blood vessel Goblet cell

Small Intestine Large Intestine

Appendix Bladder

Enterocyte

Rectum Paneth cell GUT MICROSCOPY

GUT ANATOMY

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blood sugar and cholesterol levels, and others are good for the gut-brain axis and improve mood. Research is ongoing for the use of probiotics in such diverse conditions as diabetes, dementia and Alzheimer’s.

effect in these pregnancy complications.

Some research also shows that the maternal intake during pregnancy of some bacterial strains (in particular, lactobacillus rhamnosus) can lead to a reduction in eczema in the child.

When a baby is born, it will usually pass through the vaginal canal. Over the next few days and weeks, baby’s gut (which contains no bacteria at birth) builds up bacteria and a microbiome, collected from his mum’s vaginal canal and the skin of his carers. At the time of delivery, a healthy maternal gut microbiome is important, as this affects the vaginal microbiome. We also know that, even if a mother has a Caesarean section without any labour, the type of microbiome she has is important as it predicts the type of microbiome the baby develops. Studies are showing that the best microbiome

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MAKING YOUR SELECTION So which is the right probiotic to use? This will depend on a number of factors, but particularly the benefit you’re looking for.

Not all probiotics are the same, and more strains at higher counts is not necessarily an advantage. Where possible, choose a probiotic that has research behind the strain for the benefit you are looking for.

You may at times wish to be on more than one probiotic, eg a metabolic profile benefit and a mood benefit.

It is also a good idea to choose a probiotic which contains a prebiotic.

“THE CONCEPT OF THE GUT-BRAIN AXIS IS JUST THAT. THE RECOGNITION THAT THERE IS A COMPLEX AND INTIMATE CONNECTION BETWEEN OUR GUT AND OUR BRAIN.” for the baby to have is one that is passed on from his mother and father. Another good reason for early skin-to-skin contact between a baby and his parents.

Many mothers have antibiotics at the time of delivery or soon after. Antibiotics can upset the microbiome equilibrium as they often will ‘kill off’ the good bacteria, and allow bad bacteria to get a foothold.

Probiotics are important in this setting to ensure that the mother has a healthy microbiome, both for herself and the baby at the time of birth.

A prebiotic is a substance which is ‘food’ for the good bacteria in the probiotic. So, effectively, they encourage the growth and colonisation of the strains of bacteria in the probiotic. Your pharmacist is often a good source of information on the best choice of a probiotic.

A healthy microbiome is important for gut health but also has other far-reaching effects. The gut has functions that relate to nerves, hormones and immunity, as well as the healthy breakdown and absorption of food. An unhealthy gut has been associated with a range of conditions.

Consuming fermented products and/ or taking a probiotic is a good way to ensure a healthy microbiome. However, it is important to choose a probiotic that is designed for your stage of life and the health benefits you desire to receive.

PROBIOTICS FOR THE WIDER FAMILY Probiotics can also be good for babies, toddlers and children. Some strains have been shown to improve immunity and reduce time off kindy/school for sickness, in addition to gut health benefits.

Probiotics can come in the form of capsules, powder or drops, and these days most are developed to be shelf-stable.

There are many different probiotics on offer, and options for every member of the family. Some strains are good for balancing metabolism and help with

•

Dr Emma Parry is an obstetrician, gynaecologist and maternal foetal medicine subspecialist based in Auckland.

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WHY CHOOSE A TEACHING CAREER WITH BEAR PARK? The Reggio philosophy inspires us.

Reflective collaboration is second nature among our teams and is something we warmly encourage.

We robustly support in house teacher registration, and offer in depth mentoring for beginning and fully registered teachers.

Pictured: Katja Keene, Bear Park educator and atelierista

We truly value every teacher and support them through wellness seminars, staff incentive schemes and extensive professional development.

A culture of initiative, creativity and responsiveness is encouraged at all Bear Park centres.

www.BEARPARK.co.nz

Travel abroad, ALICE PARMINTER AND FAMILY DISCOVER IRELAND, AND THAT TRAVEL WITH A TODDLER HAS ITS BENEFITS, TO BE SURE.

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ike many Kiwis, I’ve travelled before.

But no adventure has ever been quite like this – our first trip as a family. I knew it wouldn’t be easy, parenting in a foreign clime, but I didn’t expect to learn so much.

And I definitely didn’t expect the lessons to come from my toddler.

Earlier this year, my husband Chris, was contracted for a three-month stint in Ireland. His is a sought-after industry, and the Emerald Isle welcomed him with open arms. Naturally, I decided to tag along for

an extended holiday with our 13-month-old son Lucas. After all, when would I have the chance to travel again? Soon enough we’ll be tied to a house in suburban New Zealand, settled in one place as the serious business of our child’s education begins.

Ireland was a treasure trove of tourist attractions and historical sites, many of them child-friendly and all of them fascinating. Even with a toddler in tow, I still felt like a proper traveller, seeing the sights and absorbing history. I just

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happened to be the tourist who knew the location of the nearest baby-change facility.

We arrived in Dublin in March. Despite freezing temperatures, we took advantage of the excellent light rail system to explore the city over the next week before turning our sights southwards to Cork. From our new home in (very) rural Crossbarry, we then thoroughly explored much of the southern end of Ireland. As the weather got warmer, we visited forests, national parks and castles, wandering through weathered

ruins and ancient graveyards. Summer hit in the final weeks of our stay and we lazed on beautiful white-sand beaches and explored farms and wildlife parks. We embraced our new community, attending the agricultural shows and family fun days.

But of course we had to change the way we approached things. Where previous holidays might have involved cramming in as much as possible – staying out till all hours before rising early to race to the next attraction – travelling with a toddler meant we needed to slow down. Most of our outings were in the afternoon.

Lucas and I quickly established a quiet morning routine, recharging our batteries while Chris worked, before setting out to explore as a family.

We had a car, so we were able to travel at our own pace, usually leaving the house during nap time or after lunch.

Luckily, the car has always been one of Lucas’s favourite places to nap, which made extended trips much easier. As our time in Ireland progressed, Lucas napped less, and he became more interested in looking out the window. Even these car trips were entertaining. By the end of the three months, he was pointing out each passing farm with a “Moo!”, leading to rousing rounds of “Old MacDonald”.

Most of our destinations were very child-oriented. Before heading out for each new attraction, we Googled the location of the nearest playground or park. We limited the number of sit-stilland-listen experiences, instead choosing self-directed activities which allowed us to wander and explore. Restaurants were chosen for their relaxed atmosphere and inclusion of a kids’ menu, and as we ate rather early, we managed to avoid the crowds.

I thought Lucas would find much of our sightseeing boring, but he was surprisingly engaged with our adventures. We often let him set the pace, and we allowed plenty of time to look around, as he insisted on inspecting every doorway, drainpipe and mailbox in our path! When he found something interesting, he focussed on it intently, for minutes at a time.

One of my favourite places was the historic Charles Fort, at the mouth of the

“TO LUCAS’S EAR, STILL LEARNING THE BASICS OF LANGUAGE, THE IRISH LILT WASN’T AN OBSTACLE TO COMMUNICATION. IT WAS DELIGHTFUL TO WATCH HIM INTERACTING WITH THE LOCALS SO UNSELFCONSCIOUSLY, AND AS THE DAYS PASSED, I FOUND MYSELF FOLLOWING HIS EXAMPLE AND INITIATING CONVERSATIONS MYSELF.” Bandon River just outside Kinsale Town.

The 17th-century citadel was just what I had expected from Ireland – a stony mountain towering over the sparkling expanse of harbour at its feet. We visited Charles Fort four times. The first time, Lucas was enthralled. He had developed a fascination with stones – his favourite toy wherever we went – and he spent a full twenty minutes examining the uneven rocks in the gutter at the entranceway, arranging them in collections and experiencing their different textures as he shuffled them from place to place. On our third visit, he sat with his back to the view, only interested in the birds eyeing up our picnic. The time after that, we walked beyond the fort along a seaside path, and when we let Lucas paddle in the sea, he spent half an hour overturning pebbles and rubbing seaweed between his fingers.

When we visited the even more ancient James Fort on the other side of the river, it took us almost an hour to walk a ten-minute path – but we traded the time for some magnificent views while we discovered that Lucas had literally

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learned to stop and smell the flowers. And speaking of flowers, here was another source of fascination – as evidenced by the morning he spent meticulously picking every daisy on the grass verge outside our house, or the walk where we just sat and watched the bees dallying amongst a stand of purple geraniums.

Even more than stones and flowers, Lucas was drawn to the people. His looks and cheeky grin had always made him the centre of attention, but as he became interested in strangers, he was also learning that a babbling toddler is hard to ignore. Our casual strolls around nearby Bandon Town took longer and longer as Lucas stopped to wave at every person we passed. Each wave was accompanied by a cheerful “buh-bye!” – his vocabulary had exploded during our travels – and he even greeted the passing cars.

Thanks to Lucas, we often found ourselves being drawn into conversation.

What would begin with a passing compliment to our son often led to a more in-depth chat once our unmistakably Antipodean accents were uncovered.

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I initially held back from longer discussions, struggling with the Irish accent (it’s particularly strong in the south).

But to Lucas’s ear, still learning the basics of language, the Irish lilt wasn’t an obstacle to communication. It was delightful to watch him interacting with the locals so unselfconsciously, and as the days passed, I found myself following his example and initiating conversations myself.

Children were Lucas’s favourite playmates, of course. We frequented playgrounds as often as possible, aware of the lack of structured social interaction in our routine while we were travelling.

On one of our earlier outings, he watched some kids play ball from the other side of the playground, inching closer and closer but never quite working up the nerve to join in. But during our time away, we watched Lucas grow bolder. By the end of the trip, he was following a group of boys up a ramp and chatting away happily, and even convinced a couple of kids to help him collect stray balls from the ball pit.

Even though I enjoyed marvelling at the sights and sounds of a country so unfamiliar and yet so similar to home, I realised the time spent playing was often my favourite part of the day. I got to watch my little man making discoveries of his own. Lucas was learning what his body was capable of, how to interact with others, and just having the absolute time of his life.

His slide skills developed – from nervous descents while clinging to me or his dad, he quickly learned to fly unassisted down the slopes – and suddenly he was racing around the upper playground platforms.

His explorations were limited only by the still-short reach of his legs – a blessing for my poor nerves. There were quiet moments too – we spent a lot of time just reading, chatting, chilling. And I was on holiday, free to just sit and be present with him.

As the Irish seasons changed, so did we. We left the country older and, hopefully, a little wiser. Although Lucas won’t remember this trip, I can already see in him the qualities of a seasoned traveller. He’s grown, not

TOP TIPS: EXTENDED TRAVEL WITH A TODDLER Establish a routine as soon as possible. Having a relatively stable morning and nap time meant that Lucas was in a better mood during our explorations. He was also more flexible on the days we were out late.

Do your research. Google is your friend – we found every playground within 50km of our apartment, as well as several local kid-friendly events and activities. Local town and school Facebook pages often have event listings too.

Hire a car. Toddlers don’t travel light, and we also loved setting our own schedule. Alternatively, if the area has good public transport, take a stroller - both to carry your stuff and help your kiddo rest on the move.

Spend some time with the locals. Kids are a great conversation starter. They’ll enjoy interacting with your child, you’ll learn a little of the local culture and lingo … it’s win-win.

Let the toddler set your pace.

Sure, you won’t see as much, but your little one will be happy.

You’ll get to watch them grow as they explore. And really, isn’t that what travel is all about?

only in stature but in temperament. He’s confident and adventurous now, more adaptable to change.

I’m different, too. It was more relaxing somehow, to let him explore in a place where everything was new. I wasn’t tempted to rush him to the next appointment, like we were checking boxes off a list, because it was new to me as well. And through him I saw the things I wouldn’t normally have noticed or appreciated. Like the stones.

•

Alice Parminter lives in the North Waikato with husband Chris and son Lucas.

She is a journalist, writer, full-time mum and newly-minted intrepid traveller.

When she has spare time (never!), she can be found tucked away with a novel or pair of knitting needles.

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MAKING CONNECTIONS TO OUR WIDER WORLD Making connections to people, places and things help children build fundamental ideas about the world they live in and how they belong/connect to it. – M.O.E., 2017 If you open a gate, you open a chance to explore, a chance to be part of something different; your world is suddenly bigger.

At Bear Park, we enter a wider world of wonder and adventure where we can chase our curiosities further and make connections.

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Stage one of The Ruby Collection will grace the Gold Coast city skyline in November 2018, paving the way for work to commence on stages two, three and four over the following five years.

park, Kids Club, activities programme and outdoor movies to keep younger ones entertained. Adults too will relish the opportunity escapethings and unwindhelp in stylish surrounds with delicious food and Making connections to people, places toand SETTING THE BENCHMARK FOR INNOVATION AND STYLE beverage offerings, entertainment, boutique bars and quality retail stores; everything you need to relax and rejuvenate.

The first of thebuild four towers will comprise of 230 apartments children fundamental ideas about the world they and 13 ground-floor villas, combining family appeal and five2017 live in and theyindulgence belong/connect it. – M.O.E., EXPLORE THE POSSIBILITIES star facilities with a how sophisticated and cutting-edge to features. Spanning 30 floors, the apartments and sky suites will Boasting year-round sunshine, world-class theme parks, stunning provide a bird’s eye view of the Pacific Ocean and Gold Coast beaches and a relaxed outdoor lifestyle, the Gold Coast is a hinterland and cater perfectly for families, couples and even thrilling destination for all ages. Renowned for being Australia’s If youtravellers, open aproviding gate, you a furnishings Theandconnections build kids will love being within close proximity single freshopen and classy all favouritewe playground, the comforts of home.

Modern families of up to eight will love to the Gold Coast attractions, including Sea World, Movie World, chance to explore, a chance to with our wider world help us the expansive living areas, full kitchen and laundry, private Dreamworld, Whitewater World and exciting shows like the be part of something different; develop a sense of who we are ensuite with shower and thoughtful extras such as USB charging Australian Outback Spectacular. Adults will relish the exciting your is suddenly bigger. world, where we belong points, world Bluetooth speakers, complimentary Wi-Fi in andthis easy contemporary shopping destinations of Pacific Fair and Harbour access to Ruby’s own digital concierge.

The Ruby Apartments are Town, and the convenience At Bear Park, we enter a wider in it, and most importantly, a of being within walking distance of complemented by a range of resort-style amenities, with dining local cafes, vibrant bars and the rich cultural experience of Surfers world of wonder and adventure healthy relationship with the and entertainment options offering a place to relax and unwind Paradise. With a promise of warm smiles and fond memories, The where wehaving can chase earth so we can honour and the ideal base to explore the Gold Coast without ever to leave.our curiosities Ruby Collection provides at its best. further and make connections. care for it.

AN EXPERIENCE THE WHOLE FAMILY WILL ENJOY Unique in its approach, The Ruby Collection will provide immediate THE RUBY DIFFERENCE access to ample entertainment and leisure activities with familyIn short, the Ruby Collection is a game changer. It’s not just a friendly facilities including an outdoor swimming pool and water place to stay. Whilst offering apartment-style accommodation, the

www.BEARPARK.co.nz

38 147 A D V E RXTXOXRXI A XL X

SAVE UP TO 50% To celebrate the opening of The Ruby Collection this November, SAVE UP TO 50% off the daily rate plus receive a range of bonus extras including Kids Club, Waterpark access, breakfast daily and more.

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YOUR EXPERIENCE AT RUBY INCLUDES:

MAKING CONNECTIONS TO OUR WIDER WORLD

Supervised Kids Club for three- to twelve-year-olds.

A 21m salt-water lap pool, a multi-level water park and indulgent semi-submerged pool lounges.

Outdoor movies, trivia, bingo and giant board games for family entertainment.

Live music, cocktail making, wine and cheese tasting and cooking demonstrations for adults.

Teddy bear workshops, decorating, and arts & crafts for kids. team at Ruby recognise a holiday is as much about the experience.

Twenty four hour access to our cardio gym, sauna and Making connections to people, places and things help Unlike traditional holiday apartments which offer little more than steam room. a room, the build 24-hour arrival experience and resort-style Three levels of onsite, undercover car parking, children fundamental ideasamenities about the world they immediately set Ruby apart. In an Australian-first for serviced equipped with smart car charging stations. live in and they has belong/connect apartments, The how Ruby Collection incorporated the option toto it. – M.O.E., 2017 use circular self-check-in desks. Whilst Ruby Ambassadors will remain on hand 24 hours to assist, the new service offers guests the flexibility and peace of mind of knowing they can arrive at their If you open and a gate, you open a connections we build own leisure enjoy a faster, more efficient service.The Driven by the philosophy ‘we don’t do ordinary’, Ruby ‘ambassadors’ will offer chance to explore, a chance to with our wider world help us a more personalised service while creating a fun, casual atmosphere. be part of something different; develop a sense of who we are You will find ambassadors dressed up as their favourite character your is suddenly bigger. where we belong on world fancy-dress Fridays, or eager to play hopscotch in andthis singworld, their hearts out at the family karaoke night.

And for the tech-savvy At Bear Park, we enter a wider in it, and most importantly, a traveller, the Ruby Concierge app will provide guests with the world of wonder and adventure healthy relationship with the freedom to connect with ambassadors around the clock, enabling where canroom chase ourfresh curiosities earth we can honour and them we to order service, towels, or even a new teddyso bear, all direct from a tablet or mobile phone.

This interactive service further and make connections. care for it. will be available from pre-arrival and throughout each stay, both on and off the property, offering a complete holiday experience.

The Ruby Collection is a place where you can expect the unexpected.

www.BEARPARK.co.nz

147 39 XE X RXTXOXRXI A L ADV

FOR HER

—MORE— FOLIC ACID

AND IRON

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No.1 Pregn nd’s anc ala y Ze

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than any other pregnancy multivitamin

Always read the label. Use only as directed. Supplementary to and not a replacement for a balanced diet. Bayer New Zealand Limited, Auckland.

L.NZ.MKTG.03.2018.01855

^Compared to leading New Zealand pregnancy multivitamins as at October 2017. *Based on Sales (Aztec IRI Dollar MAT 01/10/2017).

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STYLING & PHOTOGRAPHY: JAIMEE CLAPHAM

ot a m a m for

Palmer’s Coconut Oil Formula anti-oxidant firming lotion, 250ml, RRP$13.99, selected pharmacies, supermarkets and department stores; This Works stress check face oil, RRP$88 from Mecca Cosmetica, Mecca Maxima and meccabeauty.co.nz; Zoono Body hand sanitiser, 50ml, $8.99, zoono.com.au; Lük Beautifood Chai Shimmer 100% natural toxic-free lipstick made from food, $32.95, naturalthings.co.nz; OGX coconut milk conditioner, RRP$17.99, ogxbeauty.com and leading retailers; Franjos ginger & apricot belly bump biscuits, $19.95, babycity.co.nz; Aú Natural Skinfood AM day serum, part of Aú Starter Pack, subscribe for $79.95 per month and receive refills every eight weeks, aunaturalskinfood.com.

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AS k your DR NICK WALKER PROVIDES EXPERT ANSWERS TO HIS MOST FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS.

W

2

HOW ABOUT IODINE SUPPLEMENTS? Several years ago, the New Zealand Ministry of Health introduced and recommended universal supplementation of the important mineral iodine. This should be used throughout the entire pregnancy and even during lactation, as iodine also passes through the breast milk to your baby. The rationale for the recommendation is that fewer people are using ‘iodised’ salt for general consumption, and also that New Zealand’s soil, and thus domestic food sources, are relatively low in iodine.

orking as a Lead Maternity Carer (LMC), I’m frequently asked certain questions again and again. Perhaps it’s because these questions relate to common problems and/or the answers are not that easy to come by. The following is my miscellaneous list of such FAQs, in no particular order, alongside my FGAs – frequently given answers!

But first, one firm piece of advice: please refrain from using Google to answer your pregnancy-related questions! You will almost always find answers that are inapplicable, inaccurate, inconsistent, or downright terrifying. Always ask your LMC, who not only knows the answers, but also knows your clinical details, and can therefore give the most appropriate advice.

3

WHEN WILL I FEEL THE BABY MOVE? Foetal movements are actually felt when there is stimulation to the nerves of the abdominal muscles and the skin of your tummy; the uterus itself does not have the necessary nerve supply to feel any foetal movements. This explains why tiny babies seen actively moving on a 12-week scan cannot be felt. When the baby is ‘strong’ enough, the force of the foetal movement goes right through the uterine wall and is therefore felt in the abdominal

1

DO I NEED TO KEEP TAKING FOLIC ACID SUPPLEMENTS THROUGHOUT THE PREGNANCY? No, these are recommended from, ideally, prior to conception through to twelve weeks gestation. Taking them beyond this time is not harmful, but it’s not necessary.

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CHOOSING YOUR LMC Your LMC will provide your care during pregnancy, labour and birth, and after your baby is born (for up to six weeks). Here are some questions to consider to help you find the best LMC for you and your baby: W hat experience and training have they had?

What antenatal care do they provide?

D o they work alone or in a group? (If it’s a group, you may want to meet the other people they work with) I f you choose to birth at home or in a birthing centre, under what conditions would they recommend you were transferred to hospital?

W hat is their policy on pain relief, episiotomies and routine monitoring?

C an you walk around during labour and find the most comfortable position for yourself to birth?

W ill your baby be put to the breast immediately after birth?

because even during a healthy pregnancy, your immune system is altered in a way that makes you more susceptible to the flu – and if you do get the flu, it can be far more severe due to the pregnancy adaptations of your body (for example, your lungs have less space due to the bump). Even if you don’t habitually get an annual flu vaccine, try to make an exception if you’re pregnant.

6

WHAT ABOUT THE WHOOPING COUGH VACCINE? WHO NEEDS TO GET IT? Similar to iodine supplementation, the whooping cough booster vaccine is a relative newcomer to the New Zealand antenatal schedule of standard care. Whooping cough is an illness caused by a bacterium that can be carried in the nose/throat of people who are apparently healthy. If a person has low immunity, the bacterium invades the lungs and causes a severe illness. Several years ago, a community outbreak of whooping cough caused many newborn babies to become ill, with some fatalities, as the babies were exposed to whooping cough prior to their sixweek immunisations. A pregnant woman who receives a booster vaccine will pass on her heightened immunity through natural mechanisms to the baby in utero. The booster shot is timed between 28 and 38 weeks gestation to optimise this effect, and is also fully funded thus free of charge. Other family members are welcome to get vaccinated for their own health benefits, but they are not funded because obviously they cannot pass their immunity to your baby!

wall, and for most women this tends to occur between 20 and 24 weeks. If the baby’s placenta is located at the front of the uterus (anterior) then that tends to cushion the movements – women who have had more than one pregnancy with a differently located placenta can usually feel this difference.

4

WHY DO WE NEED A SCAN AT 20 WEEKS IF WE DON’T WANT TO KNOW THE SEX OF THE BABY? The 20-week scan, AKA the foetal anatomy scan, looks to check that all the vital parts of your baby have formed in the correct way.

It is a complete top-to-toe assessment, and the most important problems to rule out are related to brain, heart and kidney malformations. With this scan, around 1% of babies are found to have a major birth defect, and detection of these allows for very careful planning for the remainder of the pregnancy and the birth. This scan also defines the position of the placenta. With all this in mind, the sex of the baby is irrelevant to your LMC, though of course knowing or not knowing is of special importance to expectant parents! The sex of the baby is never documented on the scan report, so it can’t be unintentionally revealed by your LMC.

7

DO I REALLY NEED TO TAKE THE TEST FOR PREGNANCY DIABETES? Yes. Pregnancy diabetes is a ‘silent’ condition, and occurs when metabolism of blood glucose becomes affected by placental hormones. You cannot feel the difference between healthy and diabetic-range blood sugar levels, but your baby’s growth and metabolism will certainly be influenced. The testing is a hassle, having to drink liquid glucose and wait for an hour or two, but the benefits of knowing your glucose metabolism are absolutely worth it.

5

DO I NEED A FLU VACCINE? This is recommended and safe during any trimester of pregnancy. It is funded, free of charge, through your GP practice,

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8

I KEEP WAKING UP FROM SLEEP ON MY BACK BUT I KNOW I MUST SLEEP ON MY SIDE FOR SAFETY – IS THIS OKAY? The safer-sleep position in pregnancy is indeed on your side (preferably left but right is okay). This is because when flat on your back and not moving, the weight of the pregnant uterus may compress its own blood supply and reduce oxygen levels to your baby. The most important detail to remember is that your starting sleep position matters most of all. When you first fall asleep, you are relatively immobile. Later on in your sleep, you naturally move about unconsciously, and this lessens the problem, so your eventual waking position is less important.

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9

IF I’M CARRYING A BIGGER BABY, WILL HE OR SHE ARRIVE SOONER? Not necessarily. It is not fully understood exactly what triggers the timing of your labour and birth, but baby size is not a factor.

If you have a scan measuring the size of the baby and your baby is larger than average, you may notice the scan-machine giving you a different and nearer due-date: this is simply the machine comparing your baby to a preset range of ‘expected’ measurements derived from population averages.

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WHAT HAPPENS IF I GO OVER THE DUE DATE? IS THE PLACENTA OKAY? Maternity care in the last few weeks of pregnancy aims to determine the health of the baby, which is almost always directly related to the health of the placenta. This is one of the reasons why visits to your LMC are scheduled weekly during the last month.

Your blood pressure, as well as the baby’s growth rate and amount of amniotic fluid, are indirect markers of placental function. Some placentae last longer than others, but it’s generally recommended that, by 42 weeks gestation, the upper limit of safety is reached and induction of labour is usually advised.

•

Dr Nick Walker is a specialist obstetrician working in both public practice at National Women’s Hospital, and private practice in Mt Eden, Auckland. He divides his time between these roles and helping his wife in caring for their four young children.

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New Packaging. Same Formulation.

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THERE’S A LOT OF PRESSURE TO SPEND UP LARGE IN ANTICIPATION OF YOUR IMPENDING ARRIVAL. NURSERY SPECIALIST GRACE NIXON SEPARATES THE ESSENTIALS FROM THE LUXURIES.

I

n my experience there are three important items new parents need to purchase: somewhere for baby to sleep, a child restraint for the car, and a buggy or pram to get out and about easily. Here we’ll explore the approximate costs of these essentials, as well as the benefits of some luxury items you may still have room in the budget for.

SLEEP TIME A safe place for your baby to sleep should be at the top of your shopping list. Bassinets and Moses baskets are popular choices but can actually be considered luxury items, as you can easily and safely sleep your baby in a cot from newborn right up until they’re ready to move into a bed, at around two or three years old.

Cots cost anywhere between $200 to $2000. If your budget is tight, I suggest buying a cheaper cot and investing in a good quality mattress that’s made of natural fibres. Mattress materials can release gases that your baby breathes while they sleep, so the more natural the materials, the better. If you’re buying or borrowing a secondhand cot, do make sure you buy a new mattress, as you never know if it has been wet from spills and leaks from the previous baby, and it could have mould on the inside. It would be very unhealthy for your baby to be breathing mould for up to 18 hours a day while sleeping! You can get a good quality mattress for around $150-$200, depending on your brand of cot. Make sure the mattress fits your cot correctly.

The benefit of having a bassinet ($250– $350) or Moses basket ($150–$200) is that they’re much smaller than a cot so you can easily sleep baby in your room.

A Moses basket, in particular, is very easy to pick up by its handles and move around the house, which is handy if you want baby to sleep in the lounge during the day so she stays close to you. Another benefit is that baby often feels a bit more secure in a Moses basket or bassinet due to the smaller size, as baby is used to being in a cosy space inside of you.

Portacots cost anywhere between $60 and $500, so if you’re only going to use one for a couple of nights a year, you might not need to buy the best on the market. I recommend waiting to purchase one until you actually need to use it. Look at how much use it will get and then base your investment on that.

Realistically, baby monitors are a luxury item unless you live in a large house where you can’t hear your baby cry. However, I am a big fan of them and believe that, if you’re going to have one, you should get one with a camera. This allows you to see the reason your baby is crying (she may just be finding her sleep) and assess the situation before you go in to her room. Baby monitors will set you back anywhere from $65 for a basic model to $400 for a fancy one with full colour screen and sensor pads.

“LAST, BUT DEFINITELY NOT LEAST – THE COFFEE CUP HOLDER ACCESSORY. A LUXURY ITEM, PERHAPS, ALTHOUGH SOME WOULD ARGUE THIS IS, IN FACT, AN ESSENTIAL! YOU DECIDE.” TRAVEL TIME You cannot leave the hospital without your baby being in a car restraint, so some sort of carseat or capsule is definitely an essential. You can buy carseats that ‘grow’ with your baby from newborn to five or six years old, or you can use a capsule that carries a baby from newborn up to around one year old. If you’re debating whether to purchase a newborn carseat or a newborn capsule, definitely go for the capsule. You can pop the capsule in a supermarket trolley, on your buggy frame, on the floor at

47 MAMA-TO - B E

a café or your friend’s house etc, and basically do what you need to do without waking your baby.

If you decide that a capsule is the way to go, the next question is do you buy one or do you hire one? This depends on your budget, and for the sake of this article, buying one is a luxury. You can hire a capsule and base from retailers for as low as $50 for six months, whereas purchasing a capsule and base costs around $400. The benefits of buying a capsule and base are that you know for sure that they’re new and clean, and haven’t been dropped or in a car accident. As your baby will only be in the capsule for up to one year, many families purchase the one capsule and base and share it around, so one capsule can be used by all the new babies in the extended family. This way they can be sure it has been kept in top condition.

BUGGY TIME Buying a pram or buggy is third on the list of the top three essential items you need for your baby.

Which buggy to purchase is a whole other article in itself, but it’s the myriad of accessories available to purchase on top of your buggy that can also be overwhelming. Firstly, be assured that a buggy on its own is the essential item here, and all the accessories are luxuries.

If you do choose to invest, I’ve listed a few of the more common accessories below, in order of priority.

Purchasing the rain and sun covers for your main pram is well worth the investment, as it’s important to keep your baby protected from our harsh New Zealand sun and frequent showers.

Rain covers are also great to protect baby from a cold wind. They usually cost around $50 each but vary depending on your brand of pram.

The capsule attachment, where you purchase adaptors that clip onto the frame of your buggy (so your capsule can be attached to your wheels) is the next most worthwhile investment. This enables you to easily transfer baby from the car to the buggy without disturbing

great size-wise – you use less water than filling up your large bath, and you can have the bath on a bench or table so you don’t have to bend over too far. They are, however, often bulky and babies grow out of them by six months old – so you then have to find somewhere to store it until your next baby! They are a cheaper item though, costing around $30 to $80.

If you’re wondering what products to use in the bath, invest in good quality natural or organic skincare products as baby’s skin is thin and sensitive.

Otherwise just use water. You don’t need to invest in a range of shampoos and body washes, they all do the same job so just pick one!

CHANGE TIME You will need somewhere to change your baby’s nappy but you certainly don’t need to invest in a specific change table to do this. You could purchase a change mat and pop it on the floor (although that’s not great for your back) or secure the mat to the top of a set of drawers. You can buy a change mat for as little as $30, and spend up to $1200 on a change table.

In terms of nappies, the long-term costeffectiveness of cloth nappies outweighs disposable nappies two to one, with cloth nappies costing around $1500 to $2000 and disposable nappies costing over $4000, based on your baby being in nappies for approximately two and a half years. Personally I don’t see either option as an essential or a luxury, what you choose should be based on your personal preferences, lifestyle and budget.

BATH TIME The kitchen sink and your bath/shower are all perfectly acceptable places to bathe your baby. Purchasing a specific baby bath is

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There are so many more items that could be debated as to whether they’re essential or a luxury. Ask your friends and family what products they think are essential, and why. Then look at your budget and prioritise the items that are important to your lifestyle, and go from there. Shop around, there are some great bargains to be had!

•

Grace Nixon is an Auckland-based midwife and nursery specialist. Go to practicalparentingantenatal.com to learn about her antenatal classes, where half the time is spent discussing what happens after baby arrives!

PHOTOGRAPHY: JAIMEE CLAPHAM

them. Plus it saves your back from carrying around the capsule. Capsule attachment adaptors cost around $80.

Just make sure you don’t exceed the recommended time limit for how long your baby can travel in their capsule.

Another useful pram accessory is the carrycot attachment. This is a luxury item but is very handy while you’re out for a long walk, at the mall, or over at friends’ houses, as baby can sleep soundly and safely flat on her back for hours. If you don’t have a Moses basket, you can use the carrycot attachment at home so baby can nap near you (in the lounge or kitchen, for example) during the day. Some carrycots can even replace the Moses basket altogether as they’ve been tested to be used safely as your baby’s first bed. Not all brands have been tested though, so do your research if you’re looking into this. Carrycots cost around $250 to $300.

Last, but definitely not least – the coffee cup holder accessory. A luxury item, perhaps, although some would argue this is, in fact, an essential! You decide. These cost around $10 to $40.

PLAYTIME Although your baby will be easily stimulated in those early weeks by simply looking around, they will enjoy being entertained at some point by books and toys.

It is great to pop baby on a mat or under a play gym for some play time while you make a cup of tea, but you don’t need to purchase a lot of expensive toys or invest heavily in an expensive bouncer. Your baby will be more than entertained lying on a soft blanket with colourful clothes pegs hanging above her or playing with a pot and wooden spoon when she’s a bit older. However, if you’re shopping for items to entertain your baby, colourful toys that make a rattling noise, black and white books, and mirrors are a good place to start.

Design you r Nu rsery Design youw ith rbabycity Nu rsery w ith babycity

A diverse range of products with style & safety in mind babycityAhave everything you need towith welcome into their new home. diverse range of products style bub & safety in mind babycity have everything you need to welcome bub into their new home.

1. Touchwood Ellah Panelled Cot with Drawer - White 2. Living Textiles Organic Cot Cellular Blanket - Grey 3. Living Textiles Musical Mobile Set Sheep 4. iBaby M2S Monitor 5. Mokopuna Swaddle Cocoono 6. Touchwood Ellah Change Table w/drawer - White Little Bamboo Wraps 3pk Drawer 120x120cm 8. Playgro 30cm - Cot GreyCellular 9. SkipBlanket Hop Light Up Diaper 1.7.

Touchwood EllahMuslin Panelled Cot with - White 2. LivingElephant Textiles Organic - Grey 3. LivingCaddy Textiles Musical Mobile Set Sheep 4. iBaby M2S Monitor 5. Mokopuna Swaddle Cocoono 6. Touchwood Ellah Change Table w/drawer - White 7. Little Bamboo Muslin Wraps 3pk 120x120cm 8. Playgro Elephant 30cm - Grey 9. Skip Hop Light Up Diaper Caddy

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Sharing THE ONE GREAT WAY DADS CAN BOND WITH THEIR NEWBORN BABY IS BY SHARING FEEDING TIME.

A

long with cuddles and kisses, bathing their baby and enjoying some quality time, one of the best ways a dad can bond with his newborn baby is by sharing baby’s feeding time with a bottle of expressed breastmilk. This also gives Mum a much-needed break.

Philips Avent Natural Bottles have a wide breast-shaped teat for an easy and natural latch on, with unique soft comfort petals that allow baby to suckle similar to the breast. They’re ideal for combined feeding – breastfeeding and expressing breastmilk for bottle feeds – and the Philips Avent Comfort Breast Pumps connect directly into the bottles and milk storage cups, allowing for easy feeding of expressed breastmilk.

The Philips Avent Natural Bottles advanced twin-valve design anti-colic system releases air into the bottle and not into baby’s tummy, reducing colic and discomfort and ensuring uninterrupted, contented feeding – which means Dad is definitely in for a treat. It’s the most natural way to bottle-feed.

We asked some new mums to trial the Philips Avent range of Comfort Breast Pumps and share their experiences:

www.ohbaby.co.nz/philipsavent

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Sleep, change, play WHATEVER YOUR BUDGET, THERE’S AMPLE OPPORTUNITY TO SAVE AND SPLURGE

Natural wonder The Musina play gym is great for keeping baby stimulated – and occupied during a nappy change! Encourages hand-eye coordination, and the clunking wood makes fascinating sounds. Beeswax finish, saliva-resistant and non-toxic. $129.95, naturebaby.co.nz.

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All class The Contemporary Cot is designed and made in New Zealand from NZ pine (sides & base) and sustainable, zero-emissions, high-quality MDF ends. Compatible with Cot-Top Bassinet, Cot-Top Changer, Toddler Bed Conversion and Sofa Conversion.

Comes in a variety of colours. $1099, cariboo.co.nz.

Always close to your baby The Philips Avent SCD 620 Video Monitor lets you soothe baby to sleep from anywhere around the home. It features a high-resolution screen with infrared night vision and a rechargeable parent unit, as well as lullabies and talk back! $299.99, babycity.co.nz.

Also available from philips.co.nz/avent.

Smooth moves The Touchwood Ellah change table with drawer has soft curves, tongue and groove panelled trays and a luxurious finish. Features metal drawer runners and lockable castors. $549, babycity.co.nz.

Save Engage the senses This Fisher Price Colourful Carnival 3-in-1 Musical Activity Gym develops sensory skills, gross motor skills, curiosity and selfdiscovery. Lay and play, push up for tummy time or sit and play on the padded play mat. Music plays for up to 10 minutes. Linkable toys move around the arches, and it’s easy to store. $50, thewarehouse.co.nz.

Simple and sensible The Sleep Store Classic Cot is made from New Zealand pine with a slatted base for ventilation. It’s a fixed-side cot – the safest and most durable option – with two height options for the base. Fuss-free and timeless, it comes in natural pine or white.

Mattress available separately. $249 from The Sleep Store.

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DR ABBY BASKETT EXPLAINS THE ART AND SCIENCE OF BREASTFEEDING TO NEW AND EXPECTANT MOTHERS.

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IN THE BEGINNING… Breasts develop during puberty and then again during pregnancy. This is called mammogenesis and is driven by different hormones at these stages of life. During pregnancy most women notice an increase in breast size, darkening of the skin over the areola (pink area around the nipple), and increased tenderness and sensitivity in the nipple area. This is because, during pregnancy, breasts are developing all the structures needed to produce a good milk supply once a baby is

t’s incredible what our bodies are designed to do and how they do things at just the right moment, often without any conscious direction. When it comes to breastfeeding, however, an understanding of what’s going on with your body (and your baby’s) will prove helpful. There are so many firsts to grapple with in the early days of a baby’s life, so it’s definitely worthwhile learning what you can about the art and science of breastfeeding before you’re faced with a hungry baby and you need to put all the theory into practice.

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born. Another name for this process is lactogenesis 1. By about half way through pregnancy, breasts are capable of producing colostrum and some women may notice a slight discharge from the nipples towards the end of their pregnancy.

SIGNS YOUR BABY IS GETTING ENOUGH MILK INCLUDE: Gulping or swallowing during feed times Coming off spontaneously and appearing happy and settled Milk leaking from the opposite breast during feeds Breasts feeling full when baby has not fed for two to three hours Baby has plenty of wet nappies and dirty nappies with most feeds for the first four weeks Weight gain of around 150-200 grams per week

COLOSTRUM: RICH AND POWERFUL Early milk is mainly colostrum. Colostrum appears thicker and oilier than later milk. It is rich in immunoglobulins – a fun word to get your mouth around – which protect the newborn against potential germs in the environment, and is very calorie-dense.

On day one a newborn’s stomach capacity is around 5 ml (only a teaspoonful!), so healthy babies are designed to survive on only a trickle of colostrum for the first day or two. During this time they feel thirsty and want to feed constantly, and the stimulation at the breast also promotes production of milk. Colostrum is thought to have many health benefits and to impact on health outcomes in later life. Bovine colostrum is marketed widely as a health supplement.

concentration of latching your baby, your shoulders may be tense or you may be holding tension somewhere else in your upper body.

Once baby is comfortable, remember to check your own body for any areas of tension. Breastfeeding is a long process in newborn babies, and holding muscle tension will result in pain.

Some nipple pain and trauma is common in the first few days after birth and usually clears up over a few days with proper latching. Some women find using a cream or ointment, such as coconut oil, lanolin or simply rubbing breast milk into the sore area, to be helpful.

“A COMFORTABLE LATCH IS MORE LIKELY IF YOUR BABY HAS A GOOD MOUTHFUL OF AREOLA – THE DARK AREA AROUND YOUR NIPPLE – AND BABY’S BODY IS NICELY LINED UP, EAR TO SHOULDER TO HIP.”

SUPPLY AND DEMAND Around week two to three, milk transitions to mature milk and is largely produced via a supply and demand (or autocrine) system.

(In medical terms this process is lactogenesis 3). The emptier your breasts are, the harder they will work to produce more milk the next time. If your breasts are producing too much milk and are consistently full, production will decrease over time. Interrupting the ‘supply-demand’ system, eg by separating from your baby for a period with no breast stimulation, or offering formula and not feeding your baby for a few hours, will reduce milk supply over the next day or so. The good news is that supply can be increased again just by increasing stimulation at the breast, either by allowing the baby to feed continuously for a day or so, or pumping and feeding.

Mature milk content varies according to time of day, gender of your baby and what you are exposed to in the environment. Milk has less fat content in the morning when breasts are fuller. As they empty during the day, the milk has a higher fat content. The fat content in emptier breasts in the afternoon and evening is more sustaining for babies and (theoretically) allows them to sleep longer periods overnight. Fuller breasts in the morning quickly satiate a baby’s thirst after a longer night sleep.

WHY YOUR CUP RUNNETH OVER The delivery of the baby and placenta causes an abrupt drop in some of the pregnancy hormones that had been inhibiting milk production. Milk production, or milk ‘coming in’, in the first few days is driven by hormonal change and occurs even in mothers whose baby is not feeding from them. At the onset of lactogenesis 2, or ‘coming in’, most women notice swelling and tightness of the breasts, which can be painful or uncomfortable for some. With good latching and the baby consistently draining milk from the breasts, symptoms usually resolve over a day or two.

MASTERING THE LATCH It is important to establish a good comfortable latch early on. Your midwife or lactation consultant will help with this. A comfortable latch is more likely if your baby has a good mouthful of areola – the dark area around your nipple – and baby’s body is nicely lined up, ear to shoulder to hip. If there is pain or a pinching feeling, or baby looks twisted or uncomfortable, take baby off the breast carefully – gently inserting your little finger into the corner of their mouth breaks the seal – and try again, or ask an expert for help.

Even if the latch looks right and feels comfortable around the nipple, don’t forget to attend to other parts of your body, such as your shoulders, back, arms and wrists. Sometimes after the

LIQUID GOLD Breast milk is known as a ‘live milk’ as it contains living cells and many, many different hormones and proteins. More components of breast milk are being discovered all the time. Special

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WHAT TO CHECK IF YOUR NIPPLES ARE HURTING: •C heck the position of the baby. Is there a straight line between baby’s ear, shoulder and hip (ie not twisting around to get at the breast)?

•C heck you haven’t twisted your nipple slightly when offering the breast – and then the nipple may have slipped into a different position.

•C heck your nipples. Are there any obvious cracks or grazes?

Join us online for advice, support, and our Breastfeeding Naturally videos.

expert, such as a midwife or lactation consultant, who should do a thorough examination of your baby’s mouth, your nipples and breasts, and also watch your baby feeding. Nipple pain has many causes, most of which are easily treated once the underlying problem is identified.

Parents (or grandparents!) often attribute unsettled behaviour or persistent crying to hunger due to undersupply of breast milk. However, there are many reasons why a baby may be unsettled.

If your baby is growing well and your midwife has not expressed any concerns about your baby’s weight, then it is likely that baby is getting enough milk and is crying for another reason.

True undersupply of milk is uncommon.

Hormonal factors influencing milk supply are still being studied but it is thought that thyroid problems, polycystic ovarian syndrome and diabetes can affect milk supply in some cases. Work in this area is ongoing.

Correcting a baby’s latch and improving their transfer of milk at the breast can often improve milk supply. Anything that impedes baby’s ability to suck efficiently – such as a tongue tie – will affect proper drainage at the breast, thus interrupting the supply-demand equation and reducing milk supply.

Breastfeeding is a combination of many different factors: baby’s mouth and tongue, nipple shape and size, milk supply, baby’s muscle tone and coordination, and mother’s prior experience and knowledge.

Not every piece of the puzzle needs to be perfectly in place for the breastfeeding to work, but sometimes making a small change to one or two of these factors can make all the difference for a successful breastfeeding experience.

immunogloblulins – or protective proteins – are expressed in breast milk after the mother’s exposure to various viruses or bacteria. These immunoglobulins protect babies against diseases in the environment that their mother has been exposed to. In fact, breast milk is an important part of a new baby’s immune system.

Tiny amounts of some of the proteins that you eat are transferred into milk giving the baby a tiny exposure to some of the tastes that their mother is eating.

Artificial milk (formula) can closely approximate human milk in terms of electrolytes, sugar content and some minerals and vitamins, but does not contain the long list of hormones, living cells and immunoglobulins present in breast milk.

IDENTIFYING PROBLEMS AND FINDING SOLUTIONS In other mammals, and in many human cultures where breastfeeding is the norm, problems with feeding are uncommon.

In developed countries, formula feeding became the new normal in the 1960s following intensive marketing by the formula companies in the 1950s and 1960s.

Consequently, generational knowledge around breastfeeding was lost and many women giving birth today were not breastfed themselves. This trend is slowly improving, and according to Plunket statistics, today 21% of infants are exclusively breastfed to six months.

Unfortunately, in New Zeland, problems with breastfeeding are common in women, and support can be difficult to find.

Two of the most frequent concerns are around painful latch, and worry about milk supply. If nipple pain is an ongoing issue, it is worth seeing a breastfeeding

•

Dr Abby Baskett (FRACP, IBCLC) is a paediatrician and lactation consultant working at Starship Children’s Hospital, Kidzhealth in Newmarket, and Birthcare Parnell. She has a special interest in infant health, particularly feeding issues, and also performs tongue-tie assessment and divisions.

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Birth from Baby’s perspective WITH THOUGHTFUL RESEARCH, AN ACTIVE IMAGINATION AND WELL- EARNED POETIC LICENCE, SARAH TENNANT PRESENTS A BABY’S EYE VIEW OF BIRTH.

D

oes labour hurt? I don’t mean for the mother. I’m writing this while heavily pregnant with my fourth child – that question has been more than adequately answered for me already, thank you very much. I mean for the baby.

After all, on paper, birth from a baby’s point of view looks pretty bad. Squeezing, crushing, skull-bones being squished to the point of overlapping, being upside down, suddenly emerging into cold, agoraphobia-inducing bright open space – it certainly doesn’t sound like the best birthday ever.

And maybe it isn’t. Or maybe it’s fine. The fact is, scientists are operating in the realm of wild guesswork when it comes to a baby’s experience of labour.

After all, asking them how they feel isn’t really an option – unless we care to trust the likes of Ray Bradbury and Salvador Dali,

who claimed to remember their own births in detail. (To put his recollections into perspective, Dali also claimed to have received visions of fried eggs while in the womb.)

What we can do is measure stress responses, such as cortisol levels and heart rates, and assume that they mean the same thing in babies as they do in adults – ie, well, stress. There’s a lot of evidence in favour of that approach. Babies have higher stress responses in higher-intervention births, and babies with high stress responses during birth tend to be fussier as infants, suggesting moderately long-lasting trauma from the experience.

But then, maybe not – other scientists claim that neurological function in babies isn’t fully developed at birth, so what seems like pain on a graph may not be interpreted by the baby as actually unpleasant. That is, they haven’t yet learnt that pain is pain.

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Then again, very young newborns definitely seem to respond to pain from procedures such as heel-prick tests or circumcisions in the conventional ‘I don’t like this, make it stop’ sense. It’s a controversial issue among scientists, and until it’s decided, perhaps it’s best just to take the philosophical approach: whether it hurts or not, we all went through it and most of us turned out okay.

THE INCREDIBLE JOURNEY Working with what we do know, let’s see if we can recreate childbirth – for simplicity’s sake, a normal, ideal, textbook birth – from the baby’s perspective.

She starts off upside down: head wedged in the pelvis, limbs still able to squirm around, but feeling pretty tight. She may have been head-down for weeks now. In an adult, being upside down for that long would cause a swollen head, blurred vision, heart and breathing difficulties, and eventually death. But for various reasons – a baby’s small size, even pressure from the surrounding fluid, the lack of breathing – she’s perfectly happy, and probably doesn’t ‘feel’ upside down at all.

For weeks now, Baby will have been noticing occasional ‘tightenings’ of the uterus – Braxton-Hicks. So when early labour begins, it won’t be a shock – contractions will feel like more of the same, only getting gradually stronger.

Of course, once Mum wakes up to the fact that labour has started, Baby may well start to feel her excitement and trepidation as well, as Mum’s hormones pass through the placenta. As the contractions get more intense, cortisol – a stress hormone – will be passed along too.

This isn’t necessarily a bad thing. Because Baby has never had to breathe, her lungs are deflated and stuck together with various gooey, mucousy liquids. Cortisol triggers Baby’s lungs to start producing surfactants – like detergents – which lubricate the lungs and help break the surface tension of the fluids, so when she takes her first breath, the lungs will inflate easily. This is one reason why babies born by elective Caesarean section tend to have more trouble breathing – the lack of stress from labour pains means the surfactants aren’t produced and the lungs stay ‘boggy’.

Cortisol performs another function, too – it acts as a ‘wakeup’ hormone. Full-term babies tend to sleep 85-90% of the time, just like newborns. But after birth, it’s important for Baby to be alert enough to find the nipple, have a drink, bond with Mum and all that fun stuff. Babies still sleep during labour – even during contractions – but cortisol ‘caffeinates’ them, as it were, for the vital half-hour or so after birth. (After that, they tend to pass out for a good long rest – perhaps more evidence that birth is hard work for babies, or perhaps just a boon for exhausted new parents!)

What do the contractions feel like? Probably not too bad.

Baby is cushioned on one side by the placenta, and all around by the amniotic fluid. Childbirth writer Henci Goer confidently states that babies “experience contractions as an all-over stimulating massage”.

Due to the placenta’s blood vessels being slightly squeezed during a contraction, Baby does experience a small drop in oxygen levels. She compensates for this by an increased heart rate following each contraction.

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the labour, the more of a ‘conehead’ she may have – but only for a few days, after which everything slowly slides back into place.

Also helping her out is the Galen reflex, which encourages her to wiggle to one side or the other when her spine is stimulated on either side. Rather than being passively squeezed out like toothpaste, Baby actually helps herself wriggle forward in the birth canal!

In most cases, drips of ‘hindwaters’ (the amniotic fluid held behind the plug of Baby’s head) will escape from time to time, lubricating the birth canal to make passage easier. Still, it’s crushing – tight enough to squeeze mucus and fluids from Baby’s lungs. Again, this is good preparation for breathing after birth.

In fact, even when Baby’s head finally emerges through the tight ring of flesh, a little at a time, and Baby’s face is in the open air, she can’t breathe.

She may open her eyes and look around, but as far as her body’s concerned, she’s still not born – her lungs are far too compressed to fill with air. In case you’ve ever wondered, this is why babies don’t drown during water births. Even if it takes a few minutes between their head being born and the whole baby surfacing, they’re still getting oxygen quite happily through the umbilical cord.

So labour progresses. More squeezing, more cortisol. At some point – perhaps when Baby’s head is pressed into the cervix so tightly that the bag of waters is bulging – the waters will pop like a balloon, and whatever amniotic fluid can escape past the plug of Baby’s head will drain out.

THE GREAT ESCAPE Now comes the tricky bit: birth. This requires Baby to squeeze through the narrow, concertinaed passage of the vagina, and it can only happen if she makes herself as small as possible for the journey. Luckily, a series of reflexes in combination with physics work together to make this possible.

As powerful muscles squeeze her, Baby turns to face her mother’s back and drops her head so her chin is touching her chest. The back of her head is now pressed directly against the cervix.

Tucking in her head allows her to ‘duck’ under the pubic bone – after that, she lifts her chin again for a more streamlined entry into the world.

To make her head even smaller, the pressure of the cervix causes the bony plates of her skull to shift and overlap, compressing her head diameter by as much as 2cm. The longer

“NOW PERHAPS THE MOST AMAZING REFLEX OF ALL KICKS IN: THE STEPPING REFLEX. SLOWLY AND JERKILY, LIKE A CROSS BETWEEN A SLOTH AND AN ARMY-CRAWLING SOLDIER, BABY LURCHES TOWARDS THE BREAST.”

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PHOTOGRAPHY: ESTHER EDITH BIRTH PHOTOGRAPHY, ESTHEREDITH.COM

Once her head is out, the tight fit causes her to turn her head to one side, activating another reflex – the ATNR (asymmetrical tonic neck reflex). This rather cunning system causes the limbs on one side of Baby’s body to flex, while the limbs on the other side extend. (Take a peek at a young sleeping baby sometime – the reflex persists for months.) In childbirth, it results in a kind of shrug which helps one shoulder to pop out, and then the other.

And once the shoulders are born – out she slides! A vast relief to Mum: but while Baby no doubt appreciates the lack of crushing pressure, her world has suddenly turned very alien indeed.

A WHOLE NEW WORLD It’s cold – she’s gone from cosy internal body heat to not only a sudden drop in temperature, but also heat loss due to the evaporation of the fluids she’s covered with. It’s bright – she’s seen light before, but only filtered through abdominal flesh.

And for the first time she can remember, there are suddenly no walls, no resistance – not even the push-back of water against her flailing limbs. She’s in outer space.

With the sudden release of pressure from her chest, she lets out a cry. Her lungs inflate for the first time, and she breathes.

After a few minutes, to ensure all her blood is pumped back out of the placenta into her body, the umbilical cord is officially retired: her brand-new respiratory system is up and running.

Lying on her mother’s tummy, Baby is alert and watchful in this new, strange environment. She enjoys the warmth of skinto-skin contact; she recognises her mother’s voice, even though it sounds pretty different on the outside.

She can’t see very far ahead – 30 centimetres at most – but she does see contrast well, and when a familiar smell catches her attention, she lifts her head and stares at her new goal: a nipple, darkened during pregnancy especially for her baby eyesight, apparently secreting the same amniotic fluid she enjoyed drinking in the womb.

Now perhaps the most amazing reflex of all kicks in: the stepping reflex. Slowly and jerkily, like a cross between a sloth and an army-crawling soldier, Baby lurches towards the breast.

It may take forty-five minutes and many false starts, but most of the time, if left to herself, she’ll reach the nipple, root around, and finally latch on. The drink she finds isn’t amniotic fluid after all – that was a ruse, a secretion by the Montgomery glands around the areola – but hey, colostrum’s good too.

She’s at the perfect distance now to gaze, cross-eyed, at her mother’s face. She’s made it. She suckles, contentedly oblivious to the contractions this stimulates as Mum’s uterus shrinks back down and the placenta detaches. The warm physical contact gradually replaces cortisol with oxytocin – the love hormone – and sooner or later, she drops off to sleep. She deserves it. She’s had quite a day.

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•

Sarah Tennant lives in Te Awamutu with her husband and four children. She sincerely hopes that, if her children grow up remembering their own births, they will keep the gory details confidential.

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The F s r u o i rs T 2 4 h MIDWIFE ABBE CHERRY SHARES AN OVERVIEW OF WHAT TO EXPECT IN THE INCREDIBLE FIRST DAY IN THE LIFE OF YOUR BABY.

T

he first 24 hours after your baby is born is often a time of transition.

It’s also a chance to catch your breath after labour, not to mention the tension of the previous months, anticipating what the day of your baby’s birth may have in store.

For your baby this is also a period of transition; from being a foetus inside your womb to being a newborn! She’ll be tired from the birth journey (whether it’s a fast or a slow birth) and will be recovering right alongside you.

sometimes situations when babies have to be taken to the Special Care Baby Unit (SCBU). At this time, partners will often be asked if they would like to come to the SCBU, however we try and reunite mums and babies as quickly as we can.

FEEDING TIME AND THE FIRST HOUR AFTER BIRTH It is recommended that babies feed within the first hour of life. Your baby will often try to make her way to the breast instinctively (this is known as the

PHOTOGRAPHY: JAIMEE CLAPHAM

“SMELL, VISION AND TASTE ALL HELP YOUR BABY TO FIND THE BREAST. YOUR VOICE AND TOUCH MAKE HER FEEL COMFORTABLE AND HELP TO CREATE A SUITABLE ENVIRONMENT TO CONNECT.” THE IMPORTANCE OF SKIN-TOSKIN CONTACT When your baby is born, she will be lifted onto your chest, dried and then, hopefully, given uninterrupted skin-to-skin contact with you. Facilities and care providers are getting better at recognising the importance of early skin-to-skin contact and successful breastfeeding, and there is a plethora of research to support this view.

During your labour, your LMC would have been closely monitoring your baby and making assessments to ensure your baby’s safety. If there were any concerns, a paediatrician may have been invited to attend your birth, so they could be on hand if resuscitation was required. For some women, congenital abnormalities are discovered antenatally, and those women may have had a plan to have a paediatric team on hand at the birth as well.

Immediately following the birth, your LMC (or the paediatric team) will assess whether your baby needs any assistance. If so, she will be taken straight away to be checked, but returned for skin-to-skin contact as soon as possible. Unfortunately, there are

‘breast crawl’) once she receives skin-toskin contact with you. In this first hour after the birth of your baby, your LMC will be busy with the final aspects of your birth: completing the third stage and aiding the delivery of your placenta, suturing and clearing up. This is an opportunity for you and your baby to get to know each other. Smell, vision and taste all help your baby to find the breast. Your voice and touch make her feel comfortable and help to create a suitable environment to connect.

After you’ve spent some time feeding and bonding with your baby, your LMC will do a full postnatal check, from top to toe. This usually includes: ✔ Measuring length, head circumference and weight ✔ Examining fontanelles (soft spots on your baby’s head) ✔ Listening to heart and lungs ✔ Checking hips ✔ Feeling for pulses in her legs ✔ Checking the cord for three vessels ✔ Checking the Moro and grasp reflexes ✔ Checking limbs, hands, fingers, feet and toes ✔ Checking eyes, and possibly the red eye reflex (RR).

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APGAR SCORING ON ARRIVAL Babies are given an Apgar score at one and five minutes after birth, and every five minutes until the score is above seven. Apgar is an acronym that stands for the five tests used to check a baby’s wellbeing. Each test is scored on a scale of zero to two, with two being the best score: ✔ Appearance (skin colour) ✔ Pulse (heart rate) ✔ Grimace response (reflexes) ✔ Activity (muscle tone) ✔ Respiration (breathing rate and effort) The Apgar test is not designed to predict a baby’s long-term health, behaviour, intelligence or outcome.

It is to help healthcare providers tell a newborn’s overall physical condition so they can quickly decide whether the baby needs immediate medical care or not. Most babies are born with an Apgar of nine at one minute, and then 10 by five minutes, losing a point for colour as their little feet are often slightly purple to begin with.

A red eye reflex is a non-invasive test that involves shining a light into your baby’s eyes to see the reflection on the back of her eye. It can show early warning signs of serious eye conditions in children, and should be completed in the first 24 hours. Whether you wanted your baby to receive vitamin K (a vitamin that plays an important role in blood clotting) will have been discussed with you antenatally, and it would be at this baby-check time that we would give this, either orally or via an injection in your baby’s thigh, in accordance with your wishes.

If your LMC has any concerns after the baby check, she’ll refer you on to the appropriate services. Usually this is the paediatric team who will see your baby straight away if it is urgent, or the next day if you’re within the hospital setting.

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TRANSFERRING FROM THE BIRTHING ROOM AND BABY’S ESSENTIAL CARE You’ll spend approximately two hours in the delivery room before being transferred to a primary facility, the postnatal ward or home, depending on your preference and whether you need to be monitored. Some babies will need their temperature and respiratory rate checked before each feed. This is because they may have been exposed to things such as group B strep, a common vaginal bacteria that can cause infection in newborns, or to meconium (the first baby poo) during labour, or any other infection risk factors.

If you have diabetes, or if you developed gestational diabetes (GDM) during pregnancy, your baby may need serial blood glucose testing. This may also be suggested if your baby is either small for her gestational age (SGA), or large for her gestational age (LGA), ie above 4.5kg. Blood is taken from your baby’s foot and tested, usually bedside.

This is commonly done within the first hour after birth, and then before each feed, until three normal results have been obtained.

Keeping your baby warm is also central to maintaining the wellbeing of your newborn. If your baby is cold, she has to use more energy to keep warm, and this could have a negative impact on her blood sugar levels. Direct skin-toskin contact is often the best way to keep a baby warm, or to warm a cool baby.

Have natural fibres ready to dress her in, such as cotton, wool or merino. Avoid polyesters as these can make babies sweat which can also make them cold.

A warm hat will help too.

Your baby is often sleepy in the first 24 hours after the birth. Use this time to get as much rest as possible yourself.

From the second night, most babies are hungry and want to feed every one to two hours to meet their nutritive needs and to help bring your milk in. It is important that your baby has access to unrestricted on-demand feeding.

When your baby sleeps, practise ‘safe sleeping’ by having her in her own bed, lying face up, with her face clear of any bedding, and preferably in a nonsmoking environment.

If you are an inpatient in a hospital or a birthing unit, you may be offered a hearing screen for your baby in the first 24 hours. It is a simple and safe test, and most babies sleep through it. If your baby does not pass, try not to stress, it’s usually because of fluid remaining in the ear or from environmental factors, and the screening team will organise a repeat test.

Your baby will usually pass meconium and urine in the first 24 hours. The urine output can be small during this time, so if you’re unsure, putting a piece of tissue into baby’s nappy may help. Meconium is the first poo your baby will do. It is thick, blackish-green and very sticky. Some parents like to put a layer of natural oil, such as almond, onto their baby’s skin to help make cleaning easier.

BABY’S FIRST DIP As midwives, we are often asked to bathe babies soon after they are born. However, we know that the vernix that covers your baby’s skin has an important role to play.

One of the primary purposes of vernix is to protect your baby from unwanted pathogens, both in the womb, and out of it. Vernix also helps to insulate your baby and keep her warm. Accordingly, the World Health Organisation recommends you don’t bathe your baby for at least 48 hours. Bathing can usually wait until you return home, and it’s often something grandparents, dads or partners love to help with.

PACE YOURSELF The first 24 hours is an incredible time for all concerned. Give yourself time to adjust to your new role, and try to rest and/or sleep when baby is sleeping, as it’s essential that you’re in a good physical and mental state to be able to cope with all the responsibilities a newborn baby entails. I recommend you only invite carefully selected friends and family to visit you, as this is a very special time for you, your partner and your new addition.

Remember, there’ll be plenty of time for visitors in the weeks to come.

•

Abbe Cherry is an Auckland-based midwife and mother of two sons.

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When to call the doctor DR ANNE TAIT HELPS TAKE THE GUESSWORK OUT OF WHEN TO SEEK MEDICAL ASSISTANCE, BRINGING PARENTS ONE STEP CLOSER TO THAT ALL- IMPORTANT PEACE OF MIND.

K

In this article I will review some common red flags – symptoms parents should look out for. This is not an exhaustive list but it focusses on the more common symptoms that children get. We should take care to note that some symptoms are more important in a certain age group but might not be that indicative of serious illness in other age groups. Clearly if a parent or caregiver is worried, then medical review should always be sought in the first instance. I always tell parents that I would much rather see mildly unwell children and provide reassurance, rather than see seriously unwell children who I think should have been reviewed earlier. Although clearly hindsight always has 20/20 vision.

nowing when to take a child to the doctor can be a difficult decision. In the cooler months when there’s a lot of coughs and colds, snot and fevers around, the prospect of spending several hours waiting to be seen by an urgent doctor only to be told that it is a ‘viral illness’ can mean that such visits may be deferred. Nowadays there are a lot of sources of helpful information to guide parents, such as Health Line (0800 611 116), and of course, the ever-present Dr Google.

However, the consequences of not seeking timely assessment can be scary, especially if a child is seriously unwell. This is particularly so when children get sick very quickly, despite initially appearing fine.

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FEVERS Children commonly get fevers. This is an important part of the body’s immune response to illness. There is no correlation with the height of the fever and the severity of the illness. Certain viral conditions (ie influenza) can result in very high fevers.

The general definition of a fever is anything higher than 38°C, although some sources state between 37.5°C and 38.3°C. All children will get fevers at some point in their childhood. Most of these are due to simple viral illnesses. However, fevers in young babies (under three months of age) are of particular concern.

Children with fevers in this age group always need to be reviewed by a doctor, as due to their immature immune system, serious bacterial infection may be present. Children aged between three to twelve months of age with a fever should also be reviewed by a medical professional, but the urgency would be dependent on the presence of other symptoms. As a child gets older, need for medical review would be more dictated by whether they had any other symptoms of note, and also parental concern.

As children get older, the risk of serious infection in association with a fever becomes less, although it’s never zero – even in adults. If an older child is otherwise relatively well in themselves (ie alert, drinking, no other symptoms of note), then most fevers can be treated at home with simple strategies such as paracetamol, fluids and observation.

Prolonged fevers of more than five days’ duration should be reviewed by a medical professional as other causes (besides infection) may be present. This is especially so if fevers are more than seven days’ duration.

One of the complications of febrile illnesses can be a febrile convulsion. This is a relatively common issue in children between one to five years of age. It occurs in approximately one out of twenty children. It used to be thought that it was the height of the fever that caused the convulsion. However it is probably more the rapid spike in fever and/or certain viruses themselves. Unfortunately, regular use of antipyretics, such as paracetamol or ibuprofen, do not prevent febrile convulsions.

VOMITING AND/OR DIARRHOEA Gastroenteritis illnesses are one of the rites of passage of childhood. Fortunately, these are becoming less common with the implementation of the rotavirus vaccination and people being much more aware about hand hygiene. Vomiting and diarrhoea can be significant symptoms in very young children as they can easily lose large amounts of fluid and become dehydrated quickly. Certainly, children under one year of age with vomiting and diarrhoea should be seen by a medical professional. Older children should be reviewed if there are concerns about their hydration status and/or they are not able to keep any fluids down.

Hydration can be assessed by looking at a child’s lips and tongue.

If these are dry then a child does have mild dehydration. If their peripheries are cool, they are lethargic, and are not producing any tears, then prompt medical review is required, as these children are more significantly dehydrated.

Bilious vomiting (green bile) is one of those symptoms that always requires medical review. If children have profuse vomiting then they may have a small amount of blood in the vomit from a small tear in the lower oesophagus. This usually prompts very quick visits to the urgent doctor but usually does not require any intervention as the small tear will self resolve.

“CONCERN IS PROBABLY THE MOST IMPORTANT SYMPTOM OF NOTE. OTHER IMPORTANT INDICATORS INCLUDE THINGS NOT IMPROVING AS WOULD BE EXPECTED, ONGOING SYMPTOMS, AND CERTAINLY ANY DETERIORATION.”

BREATHING DIFFICULTIES Respiratory tract infections are another common ailment for all children but particularly those under the age of five years old.

Common symptoms include coryza (snot), cough, increased respiratory rate, wheezing and increased work of breathing. Children under the age of one should be reviewed by a medical professional if they are having breathing difficulties. Again, this is because they can get very sick quickly at this age and they also may have low oxygen saturations that might not be recognised. Additionally, young children have great trouble feeding when they have a respiratory illness, which can cause them to get dehydrated reasonably quickly. Babies under six months breathe through their nose. If they are unwell with a respiratory tract infection, breathing always trumps feeding in their order of priority.

Breathing difficulties can be due to illness in any part of the respiratory tract. One of the important signs to look for is increased work of breathing. This relates to a child’s use of additional muscles to assist breathing. These include the intercostal muscles, chest wall, tracheal notch, head bobbing etc.

If a child is needing to use additional muscles to aid breathing ,then they definitely need medical review.

LETHARGY We all feel lethargic and not ourselves when we are unwell.

Lethargy itself is generally not a symptom to trigger warning, however if a child is lethargic to the point of not being easily roused or they’re unable to drink normally, then they should definitely be reviewed by a doctor.

69 BABY

TACHYPNOEA (FAST BREATHING) DEFINITIONS IN CHILDREN 0-6 months >60 breaths/minute 6-12 months >30 breaths/minute 1-5 years >30 breaths/minute 6-12 years >20 breaths/minute

CRYING Crying is one of those symptoms that babies and young children use to communicate their distress. All parents know that their children have many different cries which they can interpret. It’s hard to tell parents when to seek medical advice based on a cry, but I think it is generally one of those ‘gut feeling’ responses parents have to certain types of crying that are not the normal cries of hunger, annoyance, dirty nappy etc.

COMBINATION OF SYMPTOMS Most children generally have a combination of various symptoms when they are unwell. Examples of this include fever,

vomiting and diarrhoea in the context of a gastroenteritis illness.

Pneumonia typically presents with fevers, cough, fast breathing and increased work of breathing. Often when children are unwell, they tend to go off their solid food, and to a lesser extent, liquids.

Certainly, medical review should always be sought if a parent is concerned. Concern is probably the most important symptom of note. Other important indicators include things not improving as would be expected, ongoing symptoms, and certainly any deterioration. I always tell my patients that my advice at a review is a “snapshot at this particular point in time”, and certainly if things change, get worse or don’t improve within the expected time frame, then a repeat review is required. If a parent has ongoing concerns, then a second opinion (ie a fresh pair of eyes) can also be helpful.

•

Dr Anne Tait is a general paediatrician at Starship Children’s Hospital and Auckland Medical Specialists. She has an interest in all areas of children’s health and wellbeing.

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The tiniest oF HUGGIES SUPPORTS NEW ZEALAND MUMS GIVING BIRTH TO PREMATURE BABIES

A

bout 4300 babies are born pre-term in New Zealand each year, going on to spend their first few days, weeks and sometimes months in NICU nurseries, some so delicate that a nappy is the only clothing that is permitted to touch their premature skin.

Huggies believes in leaving no baby unhugged. Seeing the need for extra support, product developers and scientists from Kimberly-Clark in the US, in partnership with NICU nurses and Neonatal Therapists, designed and developed a nappy for the underdeveloped skin and unique needs of the world’s tiniest babies. In February 2017, two new super-small Huggies nappies were launched in the US. These were too good not to share, so in October 2017, trials of the tiny new Huggies nappies began in New Zealand hospitals.

The New Zealand trials recently concluded successfully, and neonatal nurses at Auckland, Middlemore, Waikato, Wellington and Christchurch Hospitals’ Newborn Intensive Care Units are now using the new Huggies nappies for the preterm babies in their care for the first time.

These tiny nappies are specially designed for babies with birth weights under 1500 grams. The Huggies Nano nappy (pictured) is new in New Zealand for babies weighing under 900 grams and the Huggies Micro nappy is new for babies weighing between 900 and 1500 grams.

Huggies Nano nappies and Huggies Micro nappies fit babies snugly as they grow and protect their delicate developing skin. Among many other features, they come with gentle fasteners and leg gathers for foetal tuck positioning, room for tubes and lines, and flexibility for nurses to place them on babies from either direction, front or back.

Dr Deborah Harris NNP PhD, Australasia’s first Neonatal Nurse Practitioner, worked with NICU nurses trialling the new nappies at the Newborn Intensive Care Unit at Waikato Hospital, where she has been practising for more than 20 years. “Improving outcomes for

babies and their families is a primary focus for all those caring for our low birth-weight babies” shares Dr Harris. “We are excited to have trialled the new Nano and Micro nappies, it’s difficult to find nappies to fit our smallest fragile newborns.”

Huggies are proud of the contribution Kimberly-Clark has made to reduce the stress to parents and improve the health and wellbeing of babies born prematurely through the supply of Nano and Micro nappies to DHBs around the country.

“Our Nano and Micro Premmie Nappies are worn by the tiniest babies, so we take time to produce them and do so with extra care. We shut down our production lines in the United States to inspect, fold and pack each nappy by hand. So when a neonatal nurse at one of our NICU nurseries in New Zealand opens a pack, we know he or she will see the name of the quality-control person who inspected those nappies inside the lid of the pack. We want the very best for these special babies.”

For more information, go to huggies.co.nz/childbirth/ premature-babies/tiniest-hugs 71 ADVERTORIAL

IT CAN BE HARD TO KNOW HOW TO BEST RELEASE TRAPPED WIND, LET ALONE COPE WITH COLIC AND REFLUX. DOROTHY WAIDE SHARES ON BURPING AND BEYOND.

A

ll babies, breastfed or bottle-fed, will need some help to deal with their wind. Effective burping plays a significant role in the routine of a contented baby.

Some babies are more difficult to burp than others, but your efforts are worth it as a well-burped baby is likely to feed well, digest well and settle more easily.

Effective burping requires firm pressure and focus, and often a combination of burping techniques is required to release stubborn wind. The following techniques are my favourites, however there are many more as well.

OVER THE KNEES, TUMMY DOWN 1. Place your baby (facing tummy down) over your knees with her left side furthest from you.

2. Support your baby’s upper body by placing one of your hands across her shoulder blades.

3. With your other hand, reach across and slip your cupped hand under the side of your baby’s body, and start rhythmically cupping up and down the tummy area. Sometimes you may hear a sloshing noise that will disappear once the gas releases.

72 BABY

4. Next, span your baby’s back so that your fingers reach one side and your thumb the other.

5. Starting from the top of baby’s nappy line, apply a little pressure as you gently, but firmly, rub up and down her back.

6. Next, move your supporting hand to the back of baby’s thighs.

7. With your other hand, place your palm at the top of baby’s nappy line and gently knead downwards over her bottom – first the left buttock, then the right buttock and then the centre – in three separate movements.

OVER YOUR KNEE ON THEIR BACK 1. Turn your baby onto her back and lay her flat so her head rests on your thigh.

2. Place one hand on baby’s chest.

3. With your other hand, span your baby’s tummy, and using a kneading technique, massage the tummy inwards and outwards.

4. Using flat fingers, massage the tummy, ideally clockwise.

SITTING UP STRAIGHT Sit baby on your knees facing you, your hands supporting her under the armpits.

Gently straighten out baby’s body so she is upright (babies with wind are often curled up) while applying a little pressure to her back with your fingers. Jiggle (bounce) your baby up and down on your knee.

OVER THE SHOULDER 1. Place baby on your shoulder, facing towards you so that her chin is resting on the crest of your shoulder.

2. Using both hands, slip your thumbs under her hips and carefully tilt upwards to straighten out her body. You may need to lift her hips slightly away from your body but you must not pull her legs in an effort to straighten them, as this can dislocate baby’s hips.

3. Using the same arm as the shoulder baby is resting on, hook your forearm around and under baby’s buttocks to support her.

4. With your other hand slightly cupped, span your baby’s back so that your fingers reach one side and your thumb the other and, starting from the top of their nappy line, apply a little pressure as you gently but firmly start rubbing up and down.

5. Next, rub up one side, then the other, then with a cupped hand, pat all over your baby’s back and sides.

ON THE CHANGE TABLE 1. Place your baby on the change table and gently but firmly take hold of her legs just on, or below, the knees.

2. Keeping baby’s knees together, gently bend them and press so that the upper thighs rest on her tummy.

3. Release slightly and with knees still bent, place to the left side of the tummy, gently press, then return to centre. Keeping knees bent, place to the right side of the tummy, gently press, then release fully so that legs are straight. Repeat sequence three times.

A NOTE ON TONGUE POSITION Your baby’s tongue should be at the base of the mouth to allow wind to pass. To check, place baby in a seated position on your knee and hook your index finger on her chin. Pull down on the lower jaw to open the mouth. Hopefully, the tongue will flop down. If it doesn’t, try ‘popping’ the cheeks by gently pressing together your thumb and forefinger in the hollow at the base of your baby’s cheeks.

REFLUX OR COLIC?

Reflux and colic are common in young babies because their digestive systems are still developing. It’s difficult to tell

REFLUX The happy spiller Happy spillers regurgitate milk numerous times a day or may vomit once or twice, then are happy and contented. (Spills smell like milk, vomit has a more rancid odour.)

It may be a small amount of milk that reappears almost as soon as it’s gone down, or it may come up later as partly digested or curdled milk. Sometimes there may be a dramatic gush from the nose and mouth.

Spilling affects both breastfed and formula-fed babies and improves with age as your baby’s digestive tract matures. It may begin soon after birth, or it might not start for three months. Some babies go through phases of frequent vomiting that suddenly stop, for no apparent reason.

“IN YOUNG BABIES THE SPHINCTER MUSCLE OR VALVE THAT SEPARATES THE STOMACH AND OESOPHAGUS IS WEAK, AND THE UNDIGESTED CONTENTS EASILY ESCAPE UPWARDS. AS BABIES GROW, THIS MUSCLE TIGHTENS AND REFLUX BECOMES LESS COMMON.” the two conditions apart, and a lot of babies tend to suffer from both. In my experience, reflux symptoms occur in the upper digestive tract – the oesophagus and stomach – whereas colic tends to affect the lower digestive tract – the small and large intestines.

COLIC Colic is the medical term for frequent crying in a young baby who appears to be otherwise healthy and well fed. It is a common condition, affecting up to one in five babies. Colic is typically associated with prolonged and inconsolable bouts of crying, often occurring in the late afternoon or evening and lasting several hours.

Babies suffering from colic often clench their fists, curl into the foetal position or arch their backs.

Experts tend to disagree on what causes colic, although it is commonly associated with a build-up of intestinal gas in a baby who has not been burped properly. I also believe stress to be a major factor.

73 BABY

The unhappy spiller An unhappy spiller is a term describing a reflux baby suffering from gastrooesophageal reflux disease (GORD). This is the medical term given to stomach acid and milk rising upwards out of the stomach into the oesophagus and mouth.

In young babies the sphincter muscle or valve that separates the stomach and oesophagus is weak, and the undigested contents easily escape upwards. As babies grow, this muscle tightens and reflux becomes less common. Reflux is unpredictable and some days will be better than others. It is thought that reflux babies experience heartburn symptoms, which cause discomfort and distress. Symptoms will be similar to those of the happy spiller, but with vivid signs of distress.

Other symptoms include: Frequent or recurrent vomiting via the mouth or nose Poor feeding, unlatching often and body arching Choking or gagging during feeding

rying during feeding C Recurrent chest infections and cough Poor weight gain Poor sleep patterns such as catnapping during the day and frequent night waking (though some will sleep well at night).

Silent reflux Silent reflux occurs when undigested milk rises, burning baby’s oesophagus, then descends again into the stomach, undetected. The condition is difficult to detect, as there are no obvious symptoms, and it often goes undiagnosed or misdiagnosed.

Telltale signs to watch for include frequent ear and sinus infections, chronic hoarse vocal sounds (often accompanied by an inflamed throat without infection), gagging or choking, and poor sleep habits, often with frequent waking.

TREATING REFLUX AND COLIC Experts tend to disagree on how to treat reflux and colic. Some professionals believe that food intolerances are a contributing factor, while others are unconvinced.

It is important to keep in mind that babies with reflux and colic need extra nurturing to help them through this distressing phase. Please see your doctor if you have ongoing concerns. Luckily, babies tend to grow out of reflux and colic.

FEEDING AND DIETARY CHANGES In my experience, food intolerances appear to contribute to reflux and colic, and by identifying and removing the troublecausing food from Mum’s diet, baby will be much happier. I suggest mothers try eliminating one food group at a time from their diet (100% avoidance for 72 hours) to see if it makes a positive difference. Doing so requires a concerted effort and reading all food labels. It is highly recommended that parents discuss dietary adjustments with a medical professional if they are concerned about food intolerances.

Try the following: Eliminate all dairy products for at least 72 hours.

If there is no change, reintroduce dairy and eliminate foods with gluten/wheat.

If still there is no change, reintroduce

gluten/wheat and eliminate all egg, followed by foods containing sugar.

If bottle-feeding: Try holding your baby in a more stretched-out position during feeding so that her stomach area is not compressed or restricted in any way. Some babies like to be held in a more upright position while feeding as this can also help prevent the swallowing of air.

Look for a bottle designed to prevent colic, and check the teat provides the right flow for your baby. If the holes in the bottle teat are too small, they may cause your baby to swallow air as they feed.

Try a lactose-free formula.

T ry a hydrolysed (where milk proteins are broken down) or partially hydrolysed formula.

Swirl formula instead of shaking it.

Some experts recommend that reflux and colicky babies be kept upright for a time after feeding, however this is not always practical. Reflux and colicky babies need all the sleep they can get, and an overtired baby is much more difficult to settle. My ‘engulf hold’ (see ohbaby.co.nz) will allow your baby to be upright and have their nap at the same time.

OTHER TREATMENT OPTIONS Dummies Dummies are a godsend for reflux babies, providing the extra comfort they need.

Research shows that sucking a dummy increases saliva that is alkaline, which can help neutralise some of the stomach acid that rises.

Complementary therapies for babies Babies respond well to alternative therapies and complementary remedies, possibly because their systems are so receptive. The best way to find a trusted and experienced therapist is by word of mouth.

Complementary remedies are worth investigating. Try colic and reflux homeopathy and herbal preparations for babies . Look for one that helps with cramping and bloating.

Probiotics are recommended for breastfeeding mothers and baby probiotics can also be given to bottlefed babies.

Craniosacral osteopathy therapy is a gentle, non-invasive treatment for babies that can produce good results in three sessions.

Acupuncture for babies is becoming more popular as it is known to produce amazing results.

•

Dorothy Waide started her career training as a Karitane Mothercraft nurse in New Zealand in the 1970s and is NZ’s leading sleep expert. Dorothy is the author of You Simply Can’t Spoil a Newborn, and is currently working on her next book, which covers baby-care from 12 weeks to toddlerhood. Find her at babyhelp.co.nz.

74 BABY

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bab y carr ier?

BABYWEARING - YAY OR NAY? GRACE NIXON, AKA THE BABY LADY, HAS THE ANSWER ALL WRAPPED UP.

B

aby carriers are marvellous at allowing you to carry your baby while also having your hands free. Baby carrying is great for travelling, shopping or when you are running around after an older child. It is also helpful if you have an overtired or sick bubba, as babies love being close to you so they can hear your heart beat.

When purchasing a baby carrier, make sure it is comfortable for you, especially on your shoulders and back. Most importantly, make sure your baby sits safely and correctly in the carrier by following safe babywearing recommendations (read more at ohbaby.co.nz). Firstly, make sure baby sits snug and high on your torso, not low on your hips. Baby should be in a hipsafe position with his knees at an angle higher than his hips. Secondly, ensure his airway is always clear and open. Baby’s chin should be at least a finger-width off his chest, his back should be in a naturally straight position, his head close enough for you to easily kiss the top of it, and you should be able to see his face at all times so you know he is breathing well.

I recommend parents purchase baby carriers directly from retailers and learn how to use them correctly. Don’t use a secondhand carrier if there are any signs of wear and tear, as the integrity of the carrier may be compromised.

There are different types of carriers, all with their pros and cons.

SLINGS Ring slings or buckle slings are made from lengths of woven fabric with rings or buckles for fastening. They are worn over one shoulder with your little one cradled

in the sling diagonally across your body when they’re small, or in a more vertical position on your hip when they’re older.

Suitable from newborn to three years old.

Slings are easy to use – you just put your baby in and pop the sling over your shoulder. It’s important to get baby’s position in this carrier correct, especially so his chin is off his chest and his airway is clear.

Slings fit all sizes of adults, so both parents can use them without much readjusting.

Slings provide support for the natural C-shape curve of a newborn spine.

The weight is directed over only one shoulder, which can tire quickly.

Mid-range slings cost around $100.

WRAPS A wrap is a long piece of fabric that is wrapped around you and baby, and tied in a variety of ways to create a carrier.

Stretchy wraps are great for little babies but unsuitable for bigger babies/toddlers.

They’re also not recommended for back carrying. Woven wraps are the way to go for carrying a larger baby/toddler.

Wraps spread baby’s weight over your shoulders and body, making them very comfortable to wear for long periods.

They’re very versatile. You can wear baby on your front, side/hip and back, and there are lots of fabric patterns to choose from.

You might need two wraps: a stretchy wrap for your newborn, then a woven wrap for your baby once he’s a bit bigger.

Wraps take a lot of practice to get right!

They can be hot as you are wrapping up to five metres of fabric around you.

Costing around $70, wraps are good value.

76 BABY

FRONT PACKS OR SOFT STRUCTURED CARRIERS These carriers are much like a backpack with padded shoulder straps and waistband and a fabric seat and back panel to support baby, put together with buckles.

They’re easy to use when you follow the manufacturer’s instructions.

They’re supportive and comfortable for both parents and baby.

They have good longevity with some carriers being able to carry children up to four years old, or around 20kgs. Some also give full 360° use, meaning you can wear baby on your front, side/hip and back.

These carriers tend to be pricier, ranging from $150 to $350, but you do get longevity out of them. Some soft structured carriers will require the use of a newborn insert that needs to be purchased separately at extra cost.

I recommend you look around while you’re pregnant and talk to your friends about their baby carriers, but wait until after your baby is born to purchase one.

It’s hard for mothers to try on baby carriers with pregnant bellies getting in the way, and it’s also good to try on the different types with your baby to find the one that is most comfortable for you both.

Grace Nixon is an Auckland-based midwife and nursery specialist. Go to practicalparentingantenatal.com to learn about her antenatal classes, where half the time is spent discussing what happens after baby arrives!

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The Ergobaby Cool Air Mesh Omni 360 is perfect for warm climates and active lifestyles.

Adaptable for newborns to 20kg, and designed with easy switch sliders for all carry positions: front facing you, front facing out, hip and back. Lightweight with lumbar support for extra back comfort. $359 from leading nursery retailers and online.

Designed and made in France and inspired by fishing nets, these Tonga baby slings are simple, strong and supple – ideal for the beach and travelling. Made from 100% organic cotton, they’re lightweight, breathable and will take on the unique shape of your child. Fully adjustable, and tested for little ones from 3.5kg to 15kg. $99, leedit.co.

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The Boba Wrap’s signature two-way stretchy fabric is easy to tie in numerous ways, and is buckle-, strap- and buttonfree! It’s ideal for newborns and fits all sizes of adults. Great for discreet breastfeeding when you’re out too.

The Boba Wrap is a quality product at an affordable price, and comes in a range of colours and patterns.

From $79.95, thesleepstore.co.nz.

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Sturdy waist belt and padded shoulders. From newborn up to three years. From $329.95 to $399.95, babycity.co.nz.

Always check manufacturers’ instructions before using baby carriers.

COLIN GRUETZMACHER CHECKS THE REAR VISION MIRROR AND GETS A FRESH PERSPECTIVE ON HITTING THE ROAD WITH HIS YOUNG FAMILY IN TOW.

D

o you ever have those moments of clarity when things come into focus and you finally feel like you understand your place in it all? This happened to me the other week on a road trip up to Auckland.

Road trips are meant to be the stuff of legend; times of utter freedom where you leave all your worries behind as the road opens up before you. Where you load up on sugar and beef jerky, turn up a collection of Toto’s greatest hits and drive towards the next adventure. Life doesn’t get much better than everyone working to hit the high harmony to bless the rains down in Africa.

Road trips with families, however, take on a whole new dynamic. The car, normally a symbol of freedom, begins to look a lot more like a small prison when you have to strap two toddlers into it for long periods of time. I had never fully appreciated the volume capacity in my children’s lungs until I heard their voices echoing in the confined space of our little Honda.

As my wife and I discussed how to plan for the trip, I felt bad that all of my ideas were based around avoiding the negatives. I wanted to steer clear of the fights, the screaming, the incessant talking etc. I was thinking iPads, Wiggles, and sugary snacks for bribes.

I was thinking about myself, when I should have been thinking about making it fun for my kids, right?

I thought back to my childhood. We’re American, but my dad got a job in Mexico City so we all lived there.

Every Christmas and summer holiday, my folks, my brother and I would make the 18-hour drive up to Texas to spend time with our extended family. We did a lot of these trips over the years.

My parents found a way to make these trips so much fun. To start with, we’d always leave at four in the morning, so we’d miss all the city traffic. That may sound rough, but it was actually amazing. It was the

days before health and safety regulations so we’d put all the seats down in our nine-seater Chevy Suburban and create this huge flat space layered in cushions and blankets where we could sleep. I’d usually wake up around ten, at which point a third of the trip was already done! They then hooked up one of those old TV/VCR combos to the cigarette lighter with a collection of the best films the ‘80s and ‘90s had to offer. We watched The Princess Bride so many times it’s inconceivable.

To top it off, my parents would always pack a chilly bin filled with enough snacks to lead us down the track to obesity. It was amazing.

It was as I was telling my wife about how awesome my parents were, and how they set up all these cool things for us, that it dawned on me. They weren’t just being nice to us, they were being nice to themselves!

I always remember feeling bad for my dad, having to get up early and drive when I was all snuggled up with a pillow, but now I understand why he did it. Those early mornings meant he had six quiet hours without me asking him how much further we had to go. The movies gave them something to listen to, while we were given something to do other than fight with each other. And by having the chilly bin in the back with us, it meant that my mum wasn’t having to pull something out of her bag every time we got bored and asked for food – we just did it ourselves.

As I loaded up my kids to head to the big smoke, I didn’t feel so guilty about the iPad I placed in their bag. I was pumped as we queued up the playlist of their favourite songs, ready for when they needed their next distraction. And I revelled in the extra food we had on offer – most of which ended up on their faces or the floor. I’m happy, they’re happy, and we’re all building good memories for the next trip.

•

Colin Gruetzmacher is the pastor of Golden Sands Baptist Church. He lives in Tauranga with his wife and two wee children, Leo (two) and Cora (18 months). He’s actually a very responsible father and usually recommends sugary snacks and electronic devices be distributed sparingly, but desperate times call for desperate measures.

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IMAGE: POSED BY MODEL

“I HAD NEVER FULLY APPRECIATED THE VOLUME CAPACITY IN MY CHILDREN’S LUNGS UNTIL I HEARD THEIR VOICES ECHOING IN THE CONFINED SPACE OF OUR LITTLE HONDA.”

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over

MIRIAM MCCALEB EXPLAINS HOW STOPPING TO SIMPLY WONDER CAN GROW SUPERPOWERS OF THE MIND.

W

e’ve learned a lot about brain development in the course of one generation. We developed neuro-imaging technologies: ways of looking beneath the skull and witnessing the trapeze acts that form superhighways of synaptic connections in our little ones’ brains.

We’ve confirmed that early experiences are extremely important, and that the quality of relationships between babies and their significant people predict oh so much about the trajectory of that baby’s life. Researchers can observe how neurochemicals in the brain react to environment. Brain scans reveal, to use the words of writer and psychology professor Lou Cozolino, how “love becomes flesh”.

Researchers have learnt about the ways that different regions of the brain are responsible for different functions. They have found out a lot.

But do you know what we’ve never found? As we’ve learned which regions of the brain develop when and control what, even as we’ve mapped the human genome … we have never found a Mind.

Because our minds are not our brains.

Our brains are a physical organ, but our minds…? Hmmmm, where are they? Our minds are always with us, and yet they seem to be invisible. We couldn’t BE without our minds, but where do they even live?

Dr Siegel talks about the mind as existing between people – it is the third point of a triangle which has ‘Relationships’ and ‘Brain’ as its other corners. It hovers between us, whoever the ‘us’ might be from moment to moment. Whether we notice that or not is optional.

In child development terms, to have a mind is to be able to hold onto someone, even when they are not with us in the room.

And the super-important next step – that is, to use a mind consciously – is to be able to use your own mind to contemplate what

RECOGNISING INDIVIDUALITY Some researchers use the term ‘mindmindedness’ to describe this concept of taking another’s point of view. Specifically, mind-mindedness refers to whether or not a parent is willing (or able) to consider their child as an individual with a mind of their own – and not just an extension of the family. Of course, we exist as members of a family, but we are still ourselves within that greater group. It’s true for us fully grown humans, but sometimes folk forget it’s true for the little fellas, too.

We could ask: is this baby or toddler acknowledged as unique in her own personhood, or is she only thought of as an addition to a couple’s story? Can the family look past Baby’s likeness to Poppa and recognise that Baby has a mind of his own? Is this infant celebrated as himself, or is his value measured as a Like-getter on parental social media? Ouch!

By the time children develop language, they will assert their own minds, but parents needn’t wait for that milestone to start thinking about this important concept. We can strengthen our own mind-mindedness skills from the time our children are tiny babies. We will benefit, the relationship will benefit, which means babies benefit, too.

The concept of being mindful has gone from existing solely in the domain of the spiritual retreat and has permeated the mainstream culture. Mindfulness is simply the act of noticing (really noticing!) what is happening in any moment. In line at the supermarket, while wiping the kitchen

“IN CHILD DEVELOPMENT TERMS, TO HAVE A MIND IS TO BE ABLE TO HOLD ONTO SOMEONE, EVEN WHEN THEY ARE NOT WITH US IN THE ROOM. AND THE NEXT STEP … IS TO BE ABLE TO USE YOUR OWN MIND TO CONTEMPLATE WHAT MIGHT BE GOING ON IN THE MIND OF ANOTHER.”

THE BENEFIT OF MIND SIGHT The best explanation I’ve ever heard for these mind-blowing concepts (‘scuse the pun) comes from Dan Siegel, a clinical professor of psychiatry, and a writer.

might be going on in the mind of another.

Dan Siegel calls this ability ‘mind sight’ – seeing another’s mind.

Mind sight is a definition of empathy.

It’s that concept of walking in someone else’s shoes, a willingness to imagine life from another person’s point of view.

This is crucial for a rich, connected life.

Empathy is amazing: it’s what enables us to make our dad’s cup of tea just the way he likes it, even if we prefer ours differently.

Empathy fuels our ability to provide effective comfort, which is important for wellbeing both in cell and in soul. On a macro level, it reduces crime and protects society’s fabric from staining and fraying.

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bench. Notice. What are my senses telling me? Are my shoulders relaxed? What are the muscles of my face up to? Just noticing.

Meanwhile, mind-mindedness is like a laser-focussed sliver of mindfulness. It’s what you get when mindfulness marries an active, conscious, curious thought process.

FLEXING THE MIND-MINDED MUSCLE I have learnt a practical (joyful!) activity that parents can practice with their infants. It’s simple, yet profound, with short- and longterm benefits that cannot be overstated.

Like brushing your teeth – it doesn’t take long, you always feel better afterward, and you’ll ward off disease. What’s more, it also increases your likelihood of being kissed!

The practice here is the act of sitting, still(ish), with your baby on your body, as you wonder about him. For at least two minutes, twice a day, just like teeth

brushing. That’s it. Rest heart-to-heart if that’s comfy, or rest with Baby in your arms, so you’re face-to-face. If it helps, spend a couple of moments moving through that state of mindfulness. Notice what is happening: your breath, the hum of the fridge, the birdsong outside. Just notice.

Feel the weight and warmth of your child’s body. Wait for you both to settle. With practice, this might only take seconds.

AND NOW, CONSCIOUS WONDERING Wonder about Baby’s experience in this moment. Free yourself from wondering about the future, or what you’ll have for dinner. Just for two minutes. Instead, just give in to wondering about Baby’s experience right now. You don’t have to describe your wondering. In fact, don’t even try. Wonder in quiet. Let your mind settle into the conscious wonder of hers.

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Wonder how Baby reacts to different types of touch or sound. Wonder what she might be feeling as you sit near that ceiling fan or in that patch of sunshine. Wonder whether she’s noticed the shadows on the wall. Wonder what that snuffly little noise she’s making might mean. Wonder what the soulful meowing of the neighbour’s cat must sound like to someone who doesn’t know about cats, yet.

As you sit, and wonder, you might notice that your breathing slows. As Stuart Shanker, king of self-regulation research, would say: “Calm begets calm”. Slower, calmer breathing from you will mean slower, calmer breathing for Baby. Your heart rate is likely to mimic your slower breath. Hearts and minds connected, just for a few minutes. It’s a beautiful thing.

Developmental psychologist Dr Patricia Champion explains how the benefits of

this type of brief, regular wondering practice will extend beyond the time it takes. “Science confirms that babies need a loving, nurturing environment for brains and bodies to grow best. When a parent takes the time to sit and wonder about what their baby may be experiencing, they practise an essential skill for being able to read their baby’s cues and meet their baby’s needs.”

Dr Champion reminds us of the seamless link between brains and bodies – science keeps confirming that it is our whole selves that experience the world. Our whole selves assess danger, sense calm, feel joy, express sadness. Not just our skin, our eyeballs, our prefrontal cortexes or our voice boxes, but the whole lot working in symphony.

This is one of the reasons that Dr Champion advises against trying the twominute Wonder Practice when you or Baby are hungry or thirsty. This can make it a wee bit tricky to find the right time, especially if you’re a calorie-burning breastfeeding machine (I was hungry almost all the time!). But it’s truly worth seeking those windows of opportunity, taking the time to build this consistent habit into your day.

As your child grows, the practice morphs. Even now, when my youngest is six, I can transform an interaction with her by reminding myself to contemplate the moment from her perspective, to wonder about her mind. My end-of-day grouchiness dissipates when I use my ‘mind sight’ ability to wonder how it must be to have a bedtime story read by a clearly resentful mum. Wondering about her experience helps me to demonstrate kindness.

Wondering about your child massages your mind, and hers. Remember that concept of your minds existing between the two of you? You could think of this practice as giving those invisible minds an opportunity to get to know one another, beyond the physical realm. If that’s a bit ‘woowoo’ for you (I know, any time someone uses the word ‘realm’, it’s borderline!), know that you and baby will be giving quite the workout to your orbitofrontal cortexes,

the region of your brains which is most active in developing empathy.

One final thought, then I’m off to wander and wonder. On the day that I met Dr Champion to talk about neurobiology, I was sporting fantastic nails, having been for a rare manicure. Now, I’m a fairly rugged gal. I stack firewood, I garden, muck out the henhouse, and do all my own stunts. Manicures have always seemed like rather a waste of time.

But on this day, I confided a minor revelation I’d had: “I think I finally understand why people get their nails done! It’s a chance to sit quietly in an otherwise hectic life”. She agreed – the process of sitting still, wondering about the life of the young manicurist, and waiting for the polish to dry – that process is as important as the shiny results. And she helped me to see that taking the time to do so is rather like taking the time to sit and wonder, alongside my child. It makes space for our beautiful minds.

•

Miriam McCaleb is the mother of two great girls, a teacher, a researcher, a wife and a writer. She has wanted to describe something as ‘woo woo’ ever since living in California in the ‘90s, and has relished writing this article as an opportunity to namecheck some of her favourite people. Visit her at babygeek.nz.

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For Future OHBABY! NUTRITIONIST HANNAH GENTILE GIVES US THE LOWDOWN ON HER FAVOURITE SUPERFOODS AND SHARES SOME FRESH IDEAS FOR INTEGRATING THEM INTO KIDS’ EVERYDAY DIETS.

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P

oor diet variation and under-nutrition are two very common issues with under-fives. As a nutritionist I could tell families the best foods for their kids to eat until I’m blue in the face … but if your child refuses to eat it, then there’s nothing ‘best’ about that food at all!

My aim with superfoods is to find something which is ‘inoffensive’ to the average child, but which is also filled with heaps of nutrients for their growing bodies and brains. Being a parent myself, I also know sleep and behaviour are really important, so my list has taken into consideration not just growth and development but also regulation of mood and sleep cycles.

1 OATMEAL Oatmeal is my top choice of superfood

and my favourite first food for babies. It’s packed full of nutrients such as vitamin E, the B vitamin group, potassium and zinc. Generally you need to add milk to it for cooking, which means your child is also getting calcium. It’s highly versatile, being used as a standalone breakfast, as well as pancakes, muffins, smoothies, bread, loaves and muesli. It’s a prebiotic, which means that it feeds the good bacteria in our gut, and keeps kids full for a long time.

2 QUINOA Quinoa is naturally gluten-free and

is also a ‘complete protein’, meaning it contains all the essential amino acids your body cannot produce itself, but are necessary for survival. This makes it ideal for vegetarians. Quinoa contains compounds which reduce inflammation, so it’s great for prevention of cancer, heart disease and depression. Another rising star is amaranth – which actually outdoes quinoa in the micronutrient race – however, it is still relatively hard to track down and slightly more costly.

3 APPLE An apple a day keeps the doctor away

… maybe. Studies do show that people who eat apples have better overall wellbeing and do visit the doctor less.

They’re also great for your teeth and gums, so that means less dental visits too – always a good thing for little kids!

“STUDIES DO SHOW THAT PEOPLE WHO EAT APPLES DO VISIT THE DOCTOR LESS. THEY’RE ALSO GREAT FOR YOUR TEETH AND GUMS, SO THAT MEANS LESS DENTAL VISITS TOO – ALWAYS A GOOD THING FOR LITTLE KIDS!” Apples are also high in fibre, so they’re useful for littlies who struggle with their bowel movements.

4 BLUEBERRIES Just one cup gives you a quarter of

your daily vitamin C needs! Blueberries also contain iron, phosphorous, calcium, magnesium, manganese, zinc and vitamin K, which help with bone, skin and mental health, as well as protecting against cancer, obesity, type 2 diabetes and heart disease. Blueberries are great in smoothies, pancakes, muffins, or stirred into porridge, and their fibre content makes them an amazing prebiotic. Watch little kids eating blueberries, as their smooth round surface can make them a choking hazard.

5 AVOCADO Avocados are a plant-based source of

mono-unsaturated ‘good fats’. They have over 20 vitamins and minerals, as well as a healthy dose of fibre to feed those good gut bacteria for a healthy digestive and immune system.

6 FISH Almost any fish on the planet is

considered incredibly healthy, however there are some that stand out from the rest. These are fatty, oily fish such as salmon, tuna, mackerel, trout and sardines. Why are they so great? All fish contain protein, which is important for healthy cell growth throughout our bodies, however oily fish also contain high levels of vitamin D, omega 3 fatty acid and iodine. These nutrients are beneficial for optimum brain and eye development, as well as helping to regulate sleep! Fish doesn’t have to be expensive – the tinned supermarket variety is just as good.

7 KIWIFRUIT Kiwifruit are

a super-fruit, chock full of nutrients like potassium, folate, vitamin C, vitamin E and vitamin K. They also have a lot of antioxidants and are a good source of fibre – essential in the feeding of those good gut bugs. They help regulate bowel movements, so are particularly useful for constipation in young children, and for pregnant women.

Superhero smoothie

Little compares with the satisfaction of watching your child knocking back a nutrient-packed snack.

Here’s another tried-and-true recipe which manages to mingle multiple superfoods into a kid-friendly drink.

Combine: • Juice of 1 carrot • ½ cup broccoli • ½ frozen banana or ¼ avocado • 1 kiwifruit • 1 cup milk

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oat pancakes

You are what

PICK NUTRIENT-RICH FOOD TO

bodies and brains.

8 BANANA These fruit are the powerhouse of

a kid’s diet. Most children love bananas, either on their own or in muffins, loaves, pancakes or on toast. If your child struggles with bananas, and you’re not keen on baking them into his or her diet, then try bananas of varying ripeness – they change substantially from day to day. Some kids like the firmer greener banana, whilst others like them slightly yellowed. Other stranger children (my daughter included) like them with their ‘chocolate spots’ – you know, when they’ve nearly had it and have started to go brown. Bananas are high in energy, a great way to get nutrients into a tiny tummy. They are stuffed full of amazing vitamins and minerals such as potassium and fibre, helping feed

that good bacteria in your kid’s tummy, keeping their immune system and gut healthy.

BUTTERS 9 NUT These are another powerhouse food.

You can pick from peanut, almond, cashew – amongst many others. Nut butters are an easy way to get energy and protein into tiny or fussy tummies.

Spread them on toast, spoon them into a smoothie, or use them as a dip for fruit.

Nut butters are a source of healthy fats, helping with brain and eye development, and they contain amino acids, fibre and phytochemicals. Nut butters also help regulate blood sugar, keeping kids’ mood and sleep patterns regular. Make sure you opt for the ‘no added sugar or salt’ options.

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You can add blueberries to this pancake batter, or have a selection of fruit for the kiddos to put on top, such as stewed apple, banana and strawberries. Unsweetened yoghurt with a dollop of honey is also a yummy option.

Ingredients: • ¾ cup flour • 1 cup oats • 2 tsp baking powder • 1½ cups buttermilk or milk (cow milk, or breastmilk or formula for little ones) • 1 tsp vanilla extract • 2 eggs Method: Preheat oven to 75°C. 1 Place all ingredients in a blender and puree until nearly smooth.

2 Place a small amount of oil or butter in a pan on medium to high heat, and pour the batter in to just cover the bottom of the pan.

3 Brown both sides by cooking for 2–3 minutes per side.

4 Put cooked pancakes in a heatproof dish and store in the oven whilst you keep cooking.

Vege Delight MuFFIns This recipe is one of my favourites – so much goodness hidden in one little package! They’re exceptionally good warm with a dab of butter, but make great lunchbox fillers as well.

Ingredients: • ¾ cup shredded zucchini • ½ cup shredded carrots • ¼ cup corn • 2 Tbsp brown sugar • 3 eggs at room temperature • ½ cup stewed apples (alternatively can be diced small) • 2 cups flour • 1½ tsp baking powder • ¾ tsp cinnamon • ½ tsp nutmeg • ¼ tsp sea salt Method: Preheat the oven to 180°C. 1 Spread the zucchini, corn and carrots on a tray lined with a paper towel to drain some of the moisture.

2 Place the eggs, brown sugar and stewed apples (if using) in a food processor and process for 30 seconds, until smooth.

If using diced apples, then these can just be folded in at the end.

3 Add the flour, baking powder, cinnamon, nutmeg and salt and process for 15 seconds more.

4 Wrap the paper towel around the vegetables and give them a light squeeze to remove excess moisture, and then fold them into the batter. Add diced apple (if using) here.

5 Divide the batter evenly among the muffin cups, filling each two thirds of the way full.

6 Bake for 30 minutes. Cool slightly before removing from tin.

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R ain b ow veges The tenth superfood I’d like to champion is vegetables, plural, I can’t pick just one vegetable, it’s impossible! I could have this whole list just full of vegetables.

Raw or slightly steamed vegetables can be more appealing to young children, and these are also the best ways to keep all the nutrients intact. My biggest tip is colour. All too often we get stuck on just one colour of vegetable – typically green (peas, beans, broccoli) with a dash of orange (carrot). However, the super power of vegetables comes in the variety that your child is exposed to.

Your baby’s protection starts with you.

The National Immunisation Schedule is a series of vaccinations that help protect your family against preventable diseases.

During pregnancy, you are eligible for a free whooping cough booster vaccine and influenza vaccine. These vaccines will help protect you and give your new baby protection, before baby is fully immunised.

Immunising on time gives the best protection.

The Immunisation Advisory Centre and Healthline provide evidence-based information about the New Zealand Immunisation Schedule.

some of my top vegetables for kids: PARSNIP Totally undervalued, this sweet and crunchy vegetable is a great alternative to carrots or potato.

CAULIFLOWER If the whole vegetable doesn’t appeal to your child, you can mash it slightly to resemble mashed potato.

CARROT Why not try purple carrots too, just for some fun and variety?

Baby carrots, if you don’t mind the additional expense, are easy for popping into lunchboxes.

BROCCOLI A serious super-vege, broccoli is not just the fuzzy bit at the top, you can also eat the crunchy stalks, so don’t throw them out! Broccoli can help with everything, from building strong bones and muscles to supporting your little one’s immune system.

RED PEPPER/CAPSICUM Really any colour capsicum is great, but the red ones are slightly sweeter, and can be more palatable for little taste buds. Capsicum support healthy cells, eyes and the immune system. Pair them with some sliced carrot and a chickpea hummus or unsweetened yoghurt dip, and you have a yummy afternoon snack.

EAS P These are good for your eyes and are a surprisingly good source of iron. Technically a legume, they’re also a good source of protein.

CORN A great source of resistant starch, which is essential food for your good bacteria, helping to reduce inflammation, increase energy, and regulate mood and sleep.

•

Call us on

0800 466 863 or visit

www.immune.org.nz

Hannah Gentile is a registered nutritionist and mother of two. She provides nutritional support and advice for conception, pregnancy, starting solids and fussy eating. Find her at nourishedbynature.co.nz.

90 KIDS

WELCOME IN SPRING WITH ANIMAL PRINTS, EARTHY TONES AND FLORAL, BECAUSE IT’S A JUNGLE OUT THERE! PHOTOGRAPHER: EMILY RAFFILLS, POINTANDSHOOT.CO.NZ • STYLIST: JAIMEE CLAPHAM

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PERSONALISE THE PARTY THEME AND YOU’RE IN FOR A GALLOPING SUCCESS

O

ne-year-old Nellie Salemme is a happy, very independent girl who loves a challenge and climbs on everything. Her mother Cassie wants her to explore – as long as she’s safe – so finds herself constantly saying “Whoa, whoa, whoa” instead of telling her “No”. So a ‘Whoa Nellie’ themed party, with hay bales, horses and other farm animals, made perfect sense.

But before the party came Nellie’s actual birthday, which the Salemme family prefer to celebrate in a more relaxed kind of style. “We always do a small celebration for our immediate family of four on each daughter’s special day, with a nice dinner and cake or cupcakes. It’s more intimate, whereas the party gets busy, and we don’t usually get to spend as much time one-on-one with them” says Cassie. The cupcake smash was a sweet family moment, and made for a beautiful photo opportunity. Cassie, dad Michael and big sister Nola refrained from any “Whoas” as Nellie tucked in to her cupcake face-first.

CHOMPING AT THE BIT About 60 friends and family members attended the farm party in the Salemme family’s back yard. As guests arrived they sat on lines of hay bales, and the farm animals joined the party shortly after. The young children were very excited about petting and feeding the animals – a mini horse, a donkey, bunnies, goats, sheep, pigs and ducks. “Nellie loved being with the animals more than any of the other kids did” remembers Cassie. “She kept saying “Nice, nice” as she patted each animal.”

1 03 KIDS

HOLD YOUR HORSES The general atmosphere was very relaxed. Cassie set up a play area with toy tractors, plastic horses and farm animals, as well as a mini drawing table with stickers, markers and horse stamps, so the kids mucked in and parents watched and socialised. Cassie admits it’s easy to stress about party planning but her advice is to let the idea come naturally, based on the personality of your child, and then create the details as the ideas come, little by little, so you don’t get overwhelmed.

•

104 KIDS

PHOTOGRAPHY & STYLING: CASSIE SALEMME, INSTAGRAM: CASSANOLA

The naked cake was topped with fresh peonies and a toy pony, and it tasted as good as it looked. “The inside was white with a chocolate mousse filling. It was absolutely delicious.”

As for decorations, Cassie kept them simple. She added farmhouse elements like a wooden table, milk carafes, wooden bins and lace burlap runners, and spruced up Nellie’s old antique high chair with a fresh lick of Annie Sloan chalk paint.

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PIPPA HENDERSON TALKS TO KRISTINA PATERSON ABOUT HOW SHE OVERCAME PERINATAL DEPRESSION, AND HOW SHE’S NOW SUCCESSFULLY HELPING OTHERS TO DO THE SAME

I

just spent an hour talking to an expert on perinatal depression. You might think I’d be feeling kind of low right now, but the conversation was unexpectedly upbeat. Sure, there was talk of how depression can envelop you like an insidious fog, and raw confessions on how the combination of sleep deprivation and depression can rob you of such a precious time of life. But there were also stories of personal victories, of invaluable and transferable lessons learnt, things which left me with a strong sense of hope for present sufferers.

Perinatal depression is an illness people tend to hide in dark corners and keep from public discussion. On the whole the topic may seem as stifling as a heavy blanket on a hot night, but when you learn how hundreds of New Zealand women are finding support and reclaiming their lives, and then you zoom in on the power of a simple kind word and a listening ear, it’s a lot easier to talk about, and the blanket doesn’t seem so smothering. You can shift your focus from its weight to the definitive holes where fresh light is shining in.

Kristina Paterson is the perfect candidate to unpack perinatal depression.

Not only did she go through a long journey of suffering and recovery herself, but she also has a background in paediatric nursing, a masters in applied social work, and is now the founder and service manager of Mother’s Helpers, a not-forprofit organisation committed to detecting perinatal depression as early as possible, treating it holistically, and giving mothers all the support they need.

WHAT IS PERINATAL DEPRESSION? Before hearing Kristina’s story, I ask her to explain the term perinatal depression.

Practitioners are now using this term because it covers depression during pregnancy as well as within the first twelve months after birth. “People are generally aware of postnatal depression, but often haven’t heard of antenatal depression, so the hope is that the term ‘perinatal’ will help people get used to the fact that depression and anxiety happen during pregnancy as well.” In fact, a recent Growing Up in New Zealand study of a diverse sample of around 5300 women showed there was actually a higher rate of depression/ anxiety in women during pregnancy than following birth.

Kristina is a case in point. She suffered from undiagnosed anxiety throughout her pregnancy, so it was a very stressful time, both physically and emotionally. “My midwife described me as overly anxious, which made me feel like a burden. I did ask her to refer me to maternal mental health and she never did, in fact she never even screened me for depression or anxiety.” Unsurprisingly, Kristina ended up with really high blood pressure, which resulted in an induction, and ultimately a complicated and traumatic birth. She now knows her experience is in line with research that shows that, when you have antenatal depression or anxiety, you’re at higher risk for complications.

Kristina’s situation continued to deteriorate post-partum. Her anxiety was heightened by breastfeeding problems, and her depression intensified. “I’d been

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a paediatric nurse and a nanny, but it never occurred to me that I’d ever feel anxious being home alone with a baby. And yet it felt like the days stretched on and on forever. I’d ring my husband and just say ‘Please come home’. I knew it was irrational, but I didn’t know how to manage on my own. You’re just surviving, from hour to hour and day to day. You don’t think clearly, or reflect, you’re just thinking how you’re going to manage the next thing that’s in front of you.” Kristina says at this point she dug really deep, pulled all her energy together and simply took care of her son’s needs. But doing so took everything out of her, and she got to the point where her energy was so low she knew she couldn’t keep going. By then her son was nine months old and people were telling her to see a doctor. “It was unbearable”, she says, and I sense that even that word didn’t do the experience justice.

A DIFFICULT HURDLE Like many sufferers, Kristina feared going to the doctor, partly because she knew what they’d say. “I thought if I don’t get a diagnosis, then maybe I don’t have it.

You have these weird irrational thoughts!

Maybe it was the stigma around it, but I also really didn’t want to take medication.”

Kristina did go to the doctor, received medication, and started to feel better within two weeks. “It’s crazy! I’d spent 18 months feeling absolutely horrible. That’s why I think if I’d been screened, diagnosed and treated earlier, I would have had a very different experience. So I feel quite robbed from that – he’s my only child.”

A HOLISTIC APPROACH She didn’t know it then, but medication was just the beginning of Kristina’s recovery.

A year later, when her medication didn’t work any more, she realised she needed a more holistic approach to her mental health. She began her own research, trying to understand how diet, exercise and talk therapy can help depression. “I learnt the early warning signs of depression, and what to do with those negative thoughts when they came into my head.” At this point I floated a theory I have about trains of thought being like literal trains – that we need to be really careful what thoughts we entertain, and read their destination before we even board them. Kristina was already all over this analogy, but was more realistic when applying it. “It’s common for women with depression to have negative thoughts, and they’re often already habitually on

“I GAVE MYSELF PERMISSION TO TAKE CARE OF MYSELF. IT’S ACTUALLY OKAY TO TAKE CARE OF YOUR NEEDS.” the ‘negative thought’ train – that’s their default. I teach them to notice that they’re on the train, and to get off at the next stop.

Otherwise it will take you to a really dark place. And it’s usually a kind thought in response to that negative thought that helps us to get off at the next platform.”

Kristina is keen to point out, however, that with perinatal depression, you’re often dealing with low self-esteem. “Research shows, if you’ve got low self-esteem, you’re a bit more at risk of developing depression,

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and so a lot of women, especially in this period of motherhood when we’re suddenly supposed to be martyrs, can get a bit like ‘I don’t deserve to have kind thoughts about myself right now. I’m not being a good enough mum … I don’t deserve someone to speak kindly to me, or to let myself off the hook.’” This is where Kristina emphasises the need for women to be realistic in their expectations in a time of healing, saying to themselves "It’s okay to ask for help and support, and to lower my expectations at the moment because I’m not very well, and I need to get better. And then when I’m better, I can be a better mum". Kristina encourages sufferers to extend themselves the same grace they’d extend to a friend. “You’d never tell your friend they’re lazy, you’d say something really encouraging, like ‘it looks like you’re doing the best you can, and you

obviously love your kids'. And that’s the type of thing that we need to be saying to ourselves.” One of the most important tools she learned during recovery was simply to look after herself. “I gave myself permission to take care of myself. It’s actually okay to take care of your needs.”

RUNNING WITH THE TORCH Kristina’s story has a happy ending: she got better – and stayed better – but knowing how much her perinatal depression had cost her, she desperately wanted to prevent other women from having to go through it.

“I wanted them to get help early on – not just be identified and diagnosed, but to be referred to something. Because I’d discovered there was really nowhere to be referred to. I didn’t meet the criteria of maternal mental health, because I wasn’t severely depressed, I was what they call moderately depressed. The only funded thing available to me was medication.”

Kristina launched Mother’s Helpers in 2010. It started out as peer support, but soon evolved as she wrote and developed a recovery programme that incorporates CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy), mindfulness, exercise and diet, identifying triggers, and how to manage anxiety. It’s a 10 week course, facilitated by trained counsellors, social workers and life coaches, which can take place in a group, or one on one, or online: mothershelpers. co.nz/pnd-recovery-course/.

The results have been impressive.

They’ve found that, within 12 weeks, 65% of women have recovered and are symptom free, while 100% of attendees had their depressive symptoms drop by 50%. “That’s really important to me” says Kristina, “I’m passionate about reducing the impact that depression and anxiety have on families, and I don’t want to do something unless it gets results.”

RESEARCH SHEDS FRESH LIGHT If you look into the consequences of perinatal depression, it’s serious stuff. Not only are the outcomes for women awful, they’re really awful for children as well.

But a recent observational study in Jama Psychiatry, involving a large sample of women, found that there was remarkably lower risk of long-term effects on children (in terms of behaviour, academic performance and mental illness) if the

Every time light

IS NEXT TO

DARKNESS, postnatal depression was short term (eg two months post-partum), compared to if it was prolonged. “So it’s not so much the depression that affects the child, it’s if the depression goes on and on” explains Kristina. “An early diagnosis, intervention and effective treatment of depression not only speeds up a woman’s recovery, but also prevents the effects on her children.”

“So we have the ability to prevent depression becoming generational?”, I ask, “To cut it off as a seed?”. “Yes!” replies Kristina, with the conviction in her voice that can only come from having already experienced the sweet taste of victory.

Kristina goes on to tell me about research released in the Journal of Behavioral Medicine in the United States this year which sheds more fresh light on maternal mental health. The study involved the testing of around 2400 women from the Community Child Health Network and showed that women with religious or spiritual affiliations are less likely to experience depressive symptoms throughout their first year post-partum.

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“This is a helpful reminder to perinatal practitioners like myself to discuss religion and spirituality, and the connections women have now, or have had in the past” says Kristina. “In Western culture we tend to exclude spirituality and religion. It’s a bit of a token question, ‘Do you have a religion?’. We don’t go into it much.

But it’s interesting as it seems to have a protective quality for women.”

So, great things are happening. There are tried and true holistic treatments proving successful at re-igniting joy in people’s lives (even when things seem so dark you can’t even find the matches) and dealing with depression before it affects the next generation. And in addition to this, research is confirming there are ways to protect yourself at your most vulnerable; timeless ways of guarding your flame. No wonder Kristina is excited about sharing the good news. “Because I’ve gone through it myself, I’m really passionate about it.

I know how awful it is, and I know that women can get better. And it actually doesn’t have to take that long.”

A letter to expectant parents, grandparents, aunties, uncles and friends.

The Ministry of Health has declared a national outbreak of whooping cough – a highly contagious disease responsible for 3 deaths during NZ’s most recent epidemic.1-3

If you’re pregnant the Ministry of Health recommend you receive a free whooping cough booster immunisation between 28 and 38 weeks of each pregnancy.3 Talk to your GP practice or midwife about this immunisation.

If you have a new baby and you did not have a booster during your pregnancy, talk to your midwife, local pharmacist or GP practice as soon as possible.

If someone close to you is pregnant or has a newborn it’s recommended (but not funded) that close contacts of newborns receive a whooping cough booster (for adults that’s every 10 years).3 Babies don’t complete their infant vaccination course for whooping cough until they’re 5-months old, so it’s important mum, other family members and friends have had their booster.3 Talk to your midwife, pharmacist, or GP practice about helping to protect yourself and your family.3

1. Ministry of Health. National outbreak of whooping cough declared Media Release. December 2017. Available at: https://www.health.govt.nz/news-media/mediareleases/national-outbreak-whooping-cough-declared 2. Institute of Environmental Science and Research Limited. Pertussis report. June 2018. Available at:https:// surv.esr.cri.nz/PDF_surveillance/PertussisRpt/2018/PertussisReport10July2018.pdf Accessed 20 August 2018. 3. Ministry of Health. 2018. Immunisation Handbook 2017 (2nd edn) Wellington: Ministry of Health. Available at https://www.health.govt.nz/publication/immunisation-handbook-2017 Accessed 20 August 2018 Marketed by GlaxoSmithKline NZ Ltd, Auckland Adverse events involving GlaxoSmithKline products should be reported to GSK Medical Information on 0800 808 500. TAPS NA10329/18AU/BOO/0030/18. GSK00705

OHBABY!: What would you say to a woman who is suffering from symptoms of antenatal or postnatal depression?

KRISTINA PATERSON: There is absolutely no shame in saying "I’m not doing very well, I don’t think I’m coping too well at the moment" – there is no shame in that. It doesn’t matter if it ends up being anxiety or depression or not, just reach out for help. I always suggest Mother’s Helpers in the first instance because you know that you’re not going to fall through the cracks: mothershelpers. org.nz or 0800 002 717, if they want to talk.

Mother’s Helpers will refer you to your GP and your midwife, and everyone else, as well as giving you help ourselves.

I’d also say always go to someone you trust. If you don’t feel comfortable talking about how you feel with your GP, they’re probably not the right GP for you. If they don’t respond in a way that is helpful, or they respond in a way that you feel shut down, or not taken seriously, then you have a right to go somewhere else. And you should know that, unless you are hospitalised against your will, no one can force you to take medication. Going to the GP is just having a conversation. She might prescribe you medication, or want to, but actually it’s your choice. It’s really good just to have a conversation about it and get their opinion. You don’t have to take it. It’s good to get that perspective because I don’t think avoiding the GP is the answer.

What I say to women in the middle of their depression is you’re not always going to feel like this. At the time you think this is it, because it feels like this every day, and it’s awful, but I say it is going to get better. The women I speak to always cry in that first session, because they feel so much release, finally being able to speak to someone, be honest

ARE YOU AT RISK, OR SUFFERING SYMPTOMS? If women are at risk they can monitor themselves, and check their symptoms using the Edinburgh Postnatal Depression Questionnaire, which is useful during pregnancy and post-partum: mothershelpers.co.nz/ epndq/ RISK FACTORS: If any of the following apply to you, you may be at risk of developing perinatal depression – but never fear!

You can prevent it by catching it early.

• P revious episode of clinical depression • F amily history of depression/ mental illness • S ingle mother • Y oung mother (under 22) • R elationship difficulties • F inancial difficulties • T raumatic birth experience • B reastfeeding problems

about how they feel, and feel accepted and supported. And then, by the end of it, I’m saying this is what we’re going to do – addressing all the issues that they’re facing – and they have a sense of hope, that feeling of ‘oh, I can get better from this, there is actually a way forward and I recover’ – a real sense of hope that they haven’t had in a long time.

OHBABY!: What would you say to someone who is concerned about their friend or family member?

KRISTINA PATERSON: Don’t be afraid to have a courageous conversation if you think someone might be experiencing anxiety or depression. Even if they get

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• S ick child (including colic and reflux) • P oor family support • P rolonged sleep deprivation (less than 6hrs sleep at one time for longer than 3 months) SYMPTOMS:

• P ersistent low mood • T earfulness •A gitated/irritable/angry •D ifficulty getting to sleep or sleeping too much

•W aking up a few hours before you’re • • • • • •

due to wake up and unable to get back to sleep N egative thoughts L ow self-esteem L oss of appetite or increased appetite L oss of interest in the things you used to be interested in L ow energy L ow motivation

offended, don’t be afraid to say "I’m really worried for you. Can I help? Can we go and talk to someone? I’m not saying you’ve got depression or anxiety but why don’t we find out if everything is alright?". Because she’s in a fog and can’t see the wood for the trees, and she needs someone to do that for her. We expect that to be happening with midwives and GPs, that if there was something going on that someone would have picked it up, but actually we have a bit of a broken system at the moment. Just keep an eye on her. If you’re worried about something, have a chat with her and take her to see a professional. Or give Mother’s Helpers a call and have a chat.

•

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They’re comfortable and kind on baby’s delicate skin. Designed with Motionflex® Technology, the stretchy soft sides are made to move with your baby for a close, comfy fit. Gender specific, with targeted absorbency in the front for boys and in the middle for girls, they also offer baby comfortable protection. Choose Huggies Ultimate Nappy Pants, with aloe vera and vitamin E, for the ultimate fit and skin protection for your active baby.

For more information, go to huggies.co.nz/nappies/nappy-pants

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the TALIA BLAKE IS CAUGHT OFF GUARD WHEN THE PRESSURE OF PARENTING (AND LIFE!) RESULTS IN A ROADSIDE BREAKDOWN.

I

Bloody Murphy.

But for now, it’s just the peaceful rumble of the car travelling along an empty stretch of road unfolding before me. Children sleeping tenderly in the back. And I’m exhaling. Our weekend away is coming to a close, and I’m feeling a twinge of triumph in my soul. I did it! And then, there it is.

Blue and red lights glisten on the cold horizon. My eyes flash at the speedometer and adrenalin pangs at my heart. 110 kilometres an hour. Dread. I hold my breath.

Will he? Won’t he? ...

He will. He U-turns, and he’s following me with swirling lights ablaze. I slow right down and pull over. Triumph is quashed, shame takes over.

He comes to my window, asks a few simple questions. As I listen, the full weight of all I’ve been carrying for the last few years is upon me. I crumble. I’m undone. Reluctantly, tears overflow.

Usually calm and collected, I’m struck by my inability to hold it together in this moment.

Concern fills the officer’s face as he surveys the situation: a crying woman, a suitcase on the front seat, three babies sleeping in the back. I was speeding, racing. What was I racing from? He recites a line: “Is there anything else the police can

’m driving along, returning home from my first solo road trip. Solo as in just me and my three young sons. To be precise: my three-year-old and my almost-two-year-old twins.

I’m coping. Surviving. They’re doing well – we’re all doing so well. Now I just need to keep holding it together while I drive my precious cargo home over these winding hills that stretch for two hours ahead of me.

They all give in to sleep and I am comforted by the reduced probability I’ll have to deal with any nappy emergencies on the side of the road, in the bitter winter wind, alone. But I remain a little anxious, wary of hope, in case Murphy senses my guard dropping and decides to remind me who has been the boss of my life for the last few years.

For the record, the last two and a half years have involved a high-risk twin pregnancy; steroid injections; pre-eclampsia; a Caesarian section, NICU and SCBU admissions – and my eldest being hospitalised simultaneously; a premature hospital discharge; feeding issues; sleep deprivation; twins with reflux; bronchiolitis; two job losses for my husband and financial pressure in the extreme. At some point in there I had to work two jobs in three locations, including shift work.

Physical exhaustion. Relentless intensity.

“‘IS THERE ANYTHING ELSE THE POLICE CAN HELP YOU WITH?’ I SENSE BOTH CAUTION AND CONVICTION IN HIS VOICE. I KNOW HE SEES. HE DOESN’T KNOW WHAT, BUT HE SEES SOMETHING. HE SEES THE WOUNDED ME.”

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of the inner storm I’ve just endured. I check my mirror. He waits.

I restart my car and slowly pull onto the icy road ahead, praying for the endurance to last the journey ... not just the next two hours, but for the years ahead.

help you with?” I sense both caution and conviction in his voice.

I know he sees. He doesn’t know what, but he sees something. He sees the wounded me. I sense that he suspects domestic abuse.

His kindness makes me want to cry even more. But it’s a case of mistaken identity. I’m not battered by a relationship, I am battered by life.

Wound tightly in knots, emotion closes my throat and I try desperately to refrain from completely breaking apart. I’m unable to put his fears to rest; I cannot physically get the words past my lips. My mind urges my body to explain that I’m safe, that I’m racing home to my best friend; my husband who protects me and has been the only thing to hold me up over the last few years. But I can’t form the words, for fear of what else might pour out if I start.

I can’t explain that the tears are a glimpse into the stress, pressure, grief, sadness and anxiety that are layered up on top of me.

As if by script, the policeman explains the ways in which I broke the law and then passes me a ticket. It’s a warning, not a fine. He spares me the loss of demerit points and the burden of a hefty fine. His strong shoulders seem heavy and his eyes worried. His uniform is strictly professional, but his face is disarmingly personal. He makes one final attempt – a sincere plea for me to reach out to someone, assuring me that there’s always help, if I’d only grab hold of it.

After all that can be said in a one-sided conversation, the kind policeman walks back to his car and waits for me to drive on. It feels like the most pregnant pause in history. I check my babies are still sleeping and breathing, still peacefully unaware

PS.

Motherhood – no, let me rephrase that – life can be amazing, but it can also be hard and heartbreaking.

So, if exercise, sleep (ha!), nutrition, prayer and counselling aren’t keeping your wellbeing in check, then please know that medication can be such a great option! I needed a friend to tell me that, to help me realise it for myself. And so now I’m telling you: don’t let stigma prevent you from getting help.

Talk to your midwife, nurse or doctor about the options available.

It won’t change your circumstances, but it might help you breathe again, enable you to laugh, and give you the capacity to choose how you respond, so you can be that kinder, happier mum you truly are.

From my journey to yours,

•

Arohanui, Talia Talia Blake is a nurse and mother of three young boys, currently doing postgraduate studies as well as renovating her house. This is made manageable thanks to also having a few creative outlets, plus an unhealthy addiction to Whittakers chocolate.

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When you can’t work out, RENÉE VINCENT HELPS NEW PARENTS FIND WAYS TO EXERCISE IN THEIR OWN HOMES, AND SHARES TIPS FOR DESIGNING A PERSONALISED AND WELL-BALANCED WORKOUT.

S

tarting a family can be a time of great upheaval. All your previous routines and habits go out the window as you get to know your baby and get to grips with being on duty 24/7. One of the things parents often have trouble finding time for in their new routine is exercise.

A 2014 BMC Public Health study looked at what got in the way of parents exercising, and found that the most

common reasons parents gave for not exercising were feeling guilty for taking time away from family responsibilities, not having enough time, having to fit exercise around other commitments, and having to work. I hear mums voicing similar concerns at my clinic. While they really want to start getting fit again, they can’t work out a way to match exercise classes with their baby’s routine, or they

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can’t find child-friendly exercise classes.

Sometimes they’re simply too tired to do a sustained period of structured exercise or are limited by weather, transport or other issues. Even if they have childcare, they feel bad taking time away from their baby.

However, exercise and physical activity are crucial for maintaining good health and help to keep you going as a parent,

DESIGN A ‘WORK IN’ THAT IS… A t your current level. Be realistic and look for beginner or postnatal-specific workouts if you're just starting out.

S afe. The last thing you need is an injury so listen to your body. Make sure you feel the exercise where it should be working; don’t push through pain. Choose workouts or exercises with clear instructions and clear pictures or videos explaining how to do them safely.

E njoyable. You’re much more likely to continue if you enjoy your exercise time, so if you manage to interact with your baby during it or choose a workout with great music or a supportive and inspiring instructor, you may find it easier to stick to it. Working out with another mum might help keep you going too.

R ewarding. Your exercise plan should feel like it is making your body work in a way that makes you feel good. You should feel that you are noticing benefits in how you move, your posture, your strength or general wellbeing, or about how you feel in yourself. If not, then try something different.

floor is pelvicfloorfirst.org.au. They’ve even created an app which you can download and refer to as you work out.

The pelvic floor works in conjunction with the abdominals and deep back muscles. Another website for learning how to carefully rebuild your core and how to exercise after pregnancy is thepregnancycentre.com.au.

To get you started, you can try the bird dog (see illustration below), a great foundational exercise for turning on your pelvic floor and deep abdominals.

Start on all fours, and find a neutral spinal posture where your lower back has a slight inward curve and your upper back is slightly rounded with your neck long and your shoulders strong (no sagging). Then slowly breathe out as you gently lift your pelvic floor muscles and draw the wall of your lower abdomen towards your spine. You should feel tightening of your abdominals at the belt line and up toward the belly button. Don’t hold your breath, brace or push out as you tighten your abs. It should be a gentle in-drawing action. Start by holding this contraction for 10 seconds and do 10-15 repetitions. When you can do this, you can increase the challenge by lifting your arm, then placing it back down and lifting a leg. The final stage is to lift both an arm and the opposite leg at the same time while maintaining your neutral spinal posture.

HERE’S ONE I PREPARED EARLIER An example of a 30-minute programme for a beginner might be to warm up by walking briskly around the garden or dancing with baby for five minutes. You could then do some arm exercises using dumbbells and resistance bands, or even using your baby as the weight, followed by some lower-body exercises like bridges, squats and lunges. You could then move into some core exercises, such as the bird dog, wall planks and – if you don’t have abdominal separation (RAD) – a half or full plank. You could then finish off with yoga poses such as cat camel or child’s pose and then a balance exercise.

RECONNECT WITH YOUR CORE

As well as the internet, your local library has a lot of exercise books on offer. If you have aches and pains or postnatal issues such as separated abdominals or pelvic floor problems, I would recommend seeing a physiotherapist for a personalised programme.

Otherwise it’s time to grab a piece of paper, start brainstorming and create your home workout plan.

I can’t emphasise enough how important it is to reconnect with your pelvic floor and abdominals (core) as part of your workout. Without these as a good foundation, you can end up with a sore back, pelvis or hips, or struggle with continence issues (leaking urine) while you exercise. A good website to visit to learn more about exercise and the pelvic

so you really need to find a way to get around these obstacles. The BMC Public Health study also looked at what made it easier for parents to exercise. One of the major facilitators was parents being able to fit physical activity in while they were with their children. They also found that parents who were motivated by being role models for their children were better at prioritising exercise for the family

and carving out time to exercise. Being flexible about the time they exercised helped too, such as exercising when the baby was sleeping or before going to work, or before a partner left for work.

Another factor that made a positive difference was if the parents had support – either through being able to exercise with others, or having support within their family.

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GET BACK TO THE DRAWING BOARD In order to make exercise happen, it can be helpful to teach yourself to get your physical activity or workout done at home and to fit it in around childcare activities.

That way, if you are short on time or childcare, you don’t miss out on exercise.

Some of you may have worked out at home successfully before and just need to figure out how to start again – with a post-

pregnancy body and a baby in tow. But for those of you who have always done structured exercise (eg classes) and always outside the home, trying to exercise successfully at home might seem daunting. First you need to know what you're aiming for in terms of a successful exercise programme. Planning is key. Start by writing down your exercise plan, including possible times, childcare options, things that will motivate you and people who will support you. Think about the type of exercise you enjoy and note down any specific exercises, stretches or yoga moves that work well for your body. This will guide you as you choose your actual workouts. Brainstorm ideas for how you could break up your exercise through the day. For example, you could do mat exercises alongside baby during their tummy time.

Figure out which of baby’s nap times might be good for exercising and the days your

Pilates, high-intensity (HIT), boot camp, Zumba – to name only a few.

KEY COMPONENTS OF A ‘WORK IN’ However, to choose the right programme you need to know what you want from the workout. For optimum health it is recommended that your fitness routine include cardiovascular exercise to get your heart rate up and increase your general fitness, resistance exercise for strength, core and pelvic floor exercises, and balance and flexibility training. You don’t need to fit all of these into one session but look to get at least two sessions of strength training a week and an element of stretching or flexibility after each session. You should also warm up and cool down.

During each session you should be working hard enough during the cardio to be able to hold a conversation, but not

“DURING EACH SESSION YOU SHOULD BE WORKING HARD ENOUGH DURING THE CARDIO TO BE ABLE TO HOLD A CONVERSATION, BUT NOT BE ABLE TO SING.” partner could have baby, so you can get out for a short walk, a bike ride or a run before doing the rest of your programme at home.

TAKE YOUR PICK The World Health Organisation recommends that in any given week you should do between 150 and 300 minutes of moderate exercise or 75 minutes of vigorous exercise.

This means you need to schedule in at least 30 minutes a day to exercise. It doesn’t need to be done all at once, but at least 10 minutes at a time is recommended. Then you need to decide what kind of exercise you’ll do at home. These days we're truly spoilt for choice, thanks to the internet. You can easily research hundreds of types of exercise and have online access to thousands of workouts that you can do in your own home – many that include working out with your baby. You can sign up with a specific personal trainer and have a programme written for you, or find generic postnatal workouts, yoga,

be able to sing. Cardio at home could be running on the spot, stationary bike, treadmill walking, skipping or dancing with your baby, for example. Or, if you prefer high-intensity interval training, you would alternate working hard enough that you can’t talk with periods of lowintensity exercise to recover your breath.

During resistance training, you should aim to work most of the major muscle groups and to do 12–15 repetitions of each exercise, rest and then repeat this 3-4 times (ie 3-4 sets of 12-15). Examples of resistance exercise would be lifting weights (you can use dumbbells, barbells, or lift your baby), using bodyweight as resistance (eg doing push-ups or squats), or using resistance bands or tubing to work muscles. The flexibility component could be floor stretching or yoga poses, and you can work on balance using yoga or simple balance challenges (eg standing on one leg with your eyes closed).

•

OHbaby! fitness expert Renée Vincent is a physiotherapist at Total Mums in Auckland and mum to an energetic young son. Find her at totalmums.co.nz.

118 MAMA

Helping hands ROUND-THE-CLOCK SUPPORT SOUNDS TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE. BUT IS IT? WE EXPLAIN EX ACTLY WHAT’S INVOLVED, AND TAKE A LOOK AT THE COSTS.

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ive-in childcare can be a brilliant solution for families requiring both flexible childcare and some extra help around the house. But those aren’t the only advantages to an extra pair of hands.

WHAT ARE THE BENEFITS? In-home help. Not only does an au pair provide dedicated one-on-one childcare in your own home, but they also help with other child-related household duties.

Au Pair Link au pairs are fully screened, interviewed and already have an average of 500 hours childcare experience. With regular support, mentoring, educational opportunities and monthly home visits by a qualified teacher, you’ll have access to constant support.

Quality education at an affordable price.

You don’t pay per child, or per hour, and by registering with a professional agency, you have access to 20 Hours ECE, subsidies, on-going support, educational resources, weekly playgroups and events to keep everyone busy.

Convenience and flexibility. An au pair provides childcare in the best location of all – your home. No more rushing out the door to get to daycare on time, or taking sick days from work because your child has a bug. As a live-in caregiver, your au pair is there to help when you need them the most.

If you have irregular hours, or work shifts, live-in care gives you the opportunity to be flexible week to week and the peace of mind of knowing your little ones are in the safe hands of someone who knows their routine.

Cultural experience. Having someone from a different culture caring for your children is fun and educational. Au pairs often become like another member of the family, and it’s not uncommon for au pairs and host families to stay in touch for years afterward.

HOW MUCH DOES IT COST? For children under five, approximately $313 per week (including PAYE tax) for 30 hours of childcare (this increases for care up to 40 hours), plus food and a room in your home.

You don’t pay per child or per hour, so if you have more than one child, it’s an extremely cost-effective option, and this cost reduces if you qualify for 20 hours ECE. WHY SHOULD I USE AU PAIR LINK? Simply put, by choosing a professional agency, you have access to high quality au pairs and on-hand support to safeguard your children against any potential risks.

Au Pair Link do all the hard work for you, to ensure the experience is a positive one for you and your family.

119 ADVERTORIAL

AU PAIR LINK PROVIDES: A comprehensive au pair and host family screening process.

Organisation and support for au pairs when booking flights, visas and insurance.

Professional contracts and employment agreements – we can even look after all of your payroll for a small weekly fee!

A guarantee or re-match policy – if your initial au pair placement does not work out (although this is rare!).

Ongoing and local support – educational resources, activities, coffee groups and playgroups.

An orientation course for au pairs once they arrive in New Zealand, to make sure they’re settled.

Opportunities for your au pair to meet other au pairs in your area, and to join organised trips and adventures.

First aid training for your au pair by an accredited first aid provider in New Zealand home-based early childhood education.

Visit us online at aupairlink.co.nz

Dotti wild flower midi dress, $69.99, fur vest, $89, and wicker canteen bag in tan, $39.99, all from Dotti; Merchant 1948 Martina weave sandals in brown, $229.90 from Merchant 1948.

IT’S A NEW SEASON, IT’S A NEW DAWN. STEP OUT IN THE BEST OF YESTERYEAR. PHOTOGRAPHER: JAIMEE CLAPHAM, PIXELSANDLIGHT.CO.NZ • STYLIST: COBY HAIMES

Max Taylor frill sleeve tee in assorted stripe, $69.99 from Max; Witchery wrap tie skirt in sandstone, $149.90, witchery. co.nz; Mi Piaci Tonya sneakers in white, $220, mipiaci.co.nz; Earrings, model’s own.

Dotti ripe stripe jumper, $39.90, and wicker canteen bag in black, $39.99, dotti.co.nz; Witchery Edie tie belt shorts in rosewood, $139.90, witchery.co.nz; Earrings, stylist’s own.

Dotti Valerie tie-front blouse, $39.99, dotti.co.nz, Just Jeans Amaze denim skirt in midblue, $69.99 from Just Jeans; Glassons knit bag in living coral, $39 from Glassons.

Ripe Maternity jeans, $129, mrssmithclothing.co.nz; Dotti basic tee in navy, $10 from Dotti; Witchery Lydia longline kimono, $349.90, and Issy heel in Bordeaux, $199.90, witchery.co.nz; Max boho tassel necklace in spring olive, $29.99, maxshop.com.

3 Bears Marley blouson maxi dress, $99, 3bears.co.nz; Max Dahlia denim jacket in light wash, $119.99, maxshop.com; Earrings, stylist’sown.

•

Hair and make-up: Nessa Warne Model: Holly @ Red11, 26 weeks’ pregnant

We used Resene SpaceCote Low Sheen waterborne enamel in Resene Yucca and Resene Eighth Thorndon Cream, and Resene Lustacryl semi-gloss waterborne enamel in Resene Eighth Thorndon Cream.

Resene Yucca Resene Eighth Thorndon Cream

Visit your local Resene ColorShop, phone 0800 RESENE (737 363) or go to resene.co.nz/colorshops

F INE Features

There’s no quicker or easier way to make a statement in a room than to give a wall a coat of boldly coloured paint. A feature wall will add vibrancy and personality and can help set off other key textures and tones. It allows you to be more daring with colour, without having to go all out!

127 DIY WITH RESENE

ENGAGE BUSY LITTLE FINGERS AND ENTERTAIN ACTIVE MINDS WITH A PLAYFUL PROJECT BY AUDREY FITZJOHN.

TOADSTOOL HOUSE You will need: • Cardboard • Self-adhesive white vinyl (from a dollar store) • Fabric scraps • Scissors • Black marker pen and a pencil • Glue

PHOTOGRAPHY AND STYLING: AUDREY FITZJOHN, AUDREYFITZJOHN.COM

Method: 1 Sketch a toadstool on the cardboard and cut out two identical toadstool shapes. Cut a slit in the foot of one toadstool and another slit in the hat of the other.

2 Trace both of your toadstool hats onto the white vinyl twice, then cut them out (so you have four vinyl stickers). Draw and cut oval shapes in each piece of vinyl to make the toadstool’s spots. (Instead of using vinyl, you could simply paint your toadstools with white paint.)

3 Peel off the backing and apply the vinyl pieces to each side of the cardboard toadstools. Cut the vinyl along the slit in the toadstool hat. Using both slits, slide each toadstool into the other so it stands up by itself.

4 With the black pen, draw different room components, eg a light, table and vase. Cut a small piece of fabric and glue it onto a wall so it looks like a tablecloth over a table, then glue some small flowers above the piece of fabric and draw a vase shape around them. Cut a small door through one of the walls of the house.

5 Embark on a little excursion with your children to find pine cones, river stones and flora and fauna to decorate your toadstool house and complete the project.

ACORN PEOPLE You will need: • Plain wooden character shapes (available for $12.50 for a set of six from nzlittlefern.com) • Fine-point black marker pen • Acorn hats (scour local parks for fallen acorns) • Glue Method: 1 Draw eyes and mouths onto each of your wooden characters.

2 Apply a dot of strong glue inside each acorn hat and press them firmly onto the characters’ heads.

129 HOME

•

beautiful bohemian LAVARA O’HANLON CREATES A BEDROOM IN KEEPING WITH HER FREE- SPIRITED DAUGHTERS.

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avara O’Hanlon is a wedding photographer and mama to three young girls living on Waiheke Island. Her photography is a great creative outlet, but when she’s not out and about capturing couples’ magic moments, she can’t help herself styling and restyling her home’s interiors, playing with patterns, colours and textures. She’s a constant re-arranger who thrives on creating and updating her girls’ spaces – one shared bedroom and a nursery.

This beautiful bedroom is home to sisters Zyla, five, and Jirah, three, who Lavara says are best friends … when they aren’t fighting.

What was your inspiration behind Zyla and Jirah’s room?

I asked the girls what theme they wanted for their room and they requested pink, with lots and lots of flowers. I searched on Instagram until I found these beautiful giant peony blooms from Rocky Mountain Decals. We’re renting our current home, so I needed decals that wouldn’t damage the paint, and these are easy to both apply and re-apply. The flowers are gorgeous and set the colour tone for the room. I then found the beautiful Bonne Mère bedspread from Kinsfolk Store, which matched the colour perfectly and is such a timeless piece. The girls love their bed canopies so we have a few different Numero 74 ones from Concrete Blush that we share between the girls’ different spaces.

131 INTERIORS

What was your biggest splurge, and your best bargain?

The HomeDay Mini Mod tan beanbag from Kinsfolk Store would be my biggest splurge. Both the girls love it though, so I might need to buy another one! It’s really good quality and handles my girls jumping on it and carrying it around the house. The girls bow hanger would probably be the best bargain. It’s actually a tie holder that I purchased from the op shop for one dollar! The girls love choosing their own accessories, and it’s a sweet way of displaying them.

Any ideas about how you might adapt the room as your girls get older?

We are looking at the option of bunks. We’ve had them in the past but moved them on as we were worried Jirah would climb up to the top bunk and fall off. If we do go with bunks, then we could fit all three girls in one room, or I could use the extra space to create a reading nook or a quiet play area.

If you’re interested in Lavara’s wedding photography, go to lavaraphotography.com.

1 32 INTERIORS

STYLING & PHOTOGRAPHY: LAVARA O’HANLON, INSTAGRAM: LAVARA_PHOTOGRAPHY

What is your favourite aspect of this room?

I like that their chest of drawers is high, so I can put any special toys out of reach if I need to! Their wardrobe is also a favourite space of mine, as I love all their beautiful dresses. One of the best things about having three girls is I can justify a beautiful collection of tutus. The girls’ favourite pieces are their Little Belle light and their rainbow projector.

FAMILY PORTRAIT FAMILY PORTRAIT FAMILY PORTRAIT PORTRAIT FAMILY

love this!

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Madam Stoltz macramé light shade, $420.90, smackbang.co.nz; Spinkie pom garland in champagne, $25, littlewhimsy.co.nz; Whitehaven storage unit, $329, freedomfurniture.co.nz; Little Belle nightlight, $155, teapea.co.nz; Olli Ella luggy basket, $98, thegatheredstore.com; Kinderfeets Kinderboard, $150, avaandalfie.co.nz; HomeDay Mini Mod Deluxe, $229, kinsfolk.co.nz; Sarah & Bendrix Kids pull along dog with xylophone, $38.50, thegatheredstore.com.

133 INTERIORS

as houses JEREMY WYN-HARRIS FROM BUILDERSCRACK SHARES HIS TOP TIPS FOR KEEPING LITTLE ONES SAFE IN EVERY ROOM OF YOUR HOME.

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e’ll spend roughly half of our lives in the comfort of our homes, so before you bring home the newest family member, it’s crucial to make sure it’s a welcoming, nurturing and safe environment for them to grow up in. Let’s take a look at some key improvements that can be made throughout the house to ensure child safety, before we delve into room specifics.

1

THROUGHOUT THE HOME Ensure the entire house is fitted with working smoke alarms, ideally photoelectric alarms. Test them regularly and replace batteries at least once a year.

Check all windows at risk of being run into are fitted with safety glass and mark large areas of glass so children can easily see them – stickers work well here. Fit security latches or locks to windows so children can’t fall out of them, especially on windows above the ground floor.

Insert plastic guards into all childaccessible power points. You could also ask an electrician to install higher power points in places where you want to leave appliances plugged in.

Use doorstops and latches to avoid doors slamming.

Dust mites, pet hair and dirt build up over time, making the floor a hazardous place for crawling babies, as well as older children who suffer from allergies. Don’t forget to get your carpet and upholstery cleaned from time to time.

Foam/soft covers on harsh corners, such as tables and kitchen counters,

can prevent unnecessary head injuries, especially when children are going through that explorative stage. Covers can be removable too, so that your home still looks the part when you have visitors.

2

KITCHEN The kitchen is one of the most dangerous rooms in the house for a little one, and they should never be left in there unsupervised. Attaching safety latches to low cupboards is a simple, lowcost way to prevent children accessing dangerous items. The cupboards under the sink are usually the most important to secure, as that’s where most household cleaners are kept. You might also want to attach latches to higher cupboards if you have a little climber who somehow manages to reach everything!

Installing a safety gate to the entrance of the kitchen is a great way to keep toddlers out of this area. The key to an effective safety gate is to make sure it is firmly attached to the wall, rather than a spring-loaded type which can pop out of place and end up being the cause of an accident instead of preventing one.

Keep all sharp, heavy and potentially dangerous objects away from the edge of benches and tables, even if they’re out of reach of your little ones. Keep pot handles facing inwards on the stove.

3

LIVING ROOMS The hub of the home, the living room is a place to recuperate and

1 34 HOME

relax after a busy day, and this goes for our kids too. As adults we’re well aware (or most of us are) not to chew the remote or run into the sharp corners of the coffee table, but that can’t really be said for our little ones.

Be earthquake-secure. Fix all large items (bookshelves, TVs, cabinets etc) to walls, as well as any other furniture that could fall and cause injury.

If you have a fireplace, invest in a quality and sturdy fireplace guard. The key is to make sure it is securely attached to the wall, to avoid children pulling it over onto themselves, or pushing it and themselves onto the fire.

A well-positioned heat pump helps to regulate temperature all year round.

Spring is a great time to install a heat pump, being a quieter time for installers.

Provide designated storage areas for all toys and games to avoid simple trips and falls.

4

CHILDREN’S BEDROOMS These are perhaps the rooms our children use most frequently, so it makes sense to ensure they’re hazard-free.

Position furniture in a way that prevents a child from using it as a climbing zone or confidence course, and avoid putting furniture near windows, so kids can’t climb up and fall out. When transitioning your child from a cot to a bed, start with a bed that’s closer to the ground, so as to prevent injury during the inevitable tumbling out.

As with the living rooms, designating a box, basket or shelf to store toys and games out of the way prevents common fall injuries.

5

BATHROOMS AND TOILETS These rooms are often overlooked when thinking about child safety, but they can be incredibly hazardous.

Installing an external lock on the bathroom and, in particular, the toilet is the best way to keep littlies out of these rooms. It only takes five centimetres of water for a toddler to drown, so keeping them out of here when unaccompanied is essential. Position the lock high enough for adults-only access.

Floating shelves might be on trend right now, but be sure to also provide

a secure place to store medicines, cosmetics and appliances you use daily, such as hair straighteners. Consider adding a lock or security latch on these cupboards, even if they’re out of direct reach, especially if your little ones are of the adventurous and cunning variety!

Medicine cabinets should be secure and lockable. It’s easy to absentmindedly leave pills on the vanity where curious little fingers can easily find them, so be sure to safely put away all medication immediately after use.

Non-slip surface finishing on floors can markedly reduce falls, as can non-slip surfaces in baths and showers. These are a great option if you’re up for a bathroom renovation, but fitting non-slip mats will also do the trick.

1 35 HOME

6

LAUNDRY There should be very little reason for your kids to be in the laundry – unless you’re starting them on chores at an early age – but just in case they wander in on their own, there are a couple of key safety features to be aware of.

A set of cupboards positioned above the sink/bench in the laundry is not only a good use of space from a design sense, but also the safest place to store household chemicals and cleaners. Fitting safety latches to all low cabinetry is the next best option.

Ensure all the locks and latches of your whiteware are working properly, so that you don’t find anyone hiding in the washing machine next time you go to put a load on!

“FENCING ANY PLAY AREA IS ESSENTIAL … IT KEEPS KIDS OFF THE DRIVEWAY WHERE, UNFORTUNATELY, MANY ACCIDENTS HAPPEN. MAKE SURE FENCE RUNGS ARE CORRECTLY SPACED AND THE FENCE IS LOW ENOUGH TO THE GROUND TO PREVENT A LITTLE HOUDINI FROM SLIPPING THROUGH.”

Always close to your baby • Private, secure connection • High resolution 2.7” screen • Crystal-clear infra-red night vision • Up to 10 hours cordless operating time • Soothing lullabies and talkback

7

STAIRS These are essentially a slide/climbing frame for kids, so a few precautions could save a lot of broken bones.

A wall-fixed safety gate at both the top and bottom of any internal or external stairs will significantly reduce the risk of a child falling. As I mentioned in the kitchen section, the key is for it to be firmly attached to the wall on both sides.

Ensure there are no gaps between balustrades or open risers that a child could fit through. There are strict regulations in the building code that require open-riser style stairs that are frequented by children under four to have no gaps that would allow a 100mm sphere to pass through, or 130mm for children aged four to five years.

For any stairs with a fall greater than one metre, barriers are required to be at least 900mm high.

8

GARAGES AND SHEDS These are potentially one of the most dangerous areas in the house due to the type of things typically stored here.

Keeping garages locked is by far the best way to keep children safe from vehicles, machinery, tools and chemicals.

Store all chemicals up high and never store them in familiar bottles, like old drink containers. Young children are often fooled by a brand or a colour, seeing it as a yummy drink rather than the poison that it is.

SCD 620 Video Monitor

Available from and other leading retailers Follow us on Facebook www.philips.co.nz/avent

9

BACK YARD Kids will spend hours out here – covered in sunscreen, of course – tiring themselves out so everyone sleeps well.

But there are a few potential hazards to address before letting kids run wild.

Fencing any play area is essential. It not only prevents kids from wandering, but also keeps them off the driveway where, unfortunately, many accidents happen. Make sure fence rungs are correctly spaced and the fence is low enough to the ground to prevent a little Houdini from slipping through.

A self-latching safety gate will help give you peace of mind.

Strict rules must be followed if you have a swimming pool. Any pool deeper than 400mm is required to be fenced, in accordance with the Fencing of Swimming Pools Act 1987. This includes many of the inflatable pools that became popular last summer, something most people aren’t aware of. The Act requires fences to be 1.2 metres high, fixed and childproof, with a self-closing gate opening outwards.

After the wetness of winter, you’ll undoubtedly notice any drainage problems in your backyard. If you spot significant pooling, it’s important to get this fixed.

Place children’s play equipment over a soft material, such as lawn or bark chip.

Many regions in New Zealand experience strong spring winds that often cause significant damage to trees.

Avoid the risk of falling limbs and broken branches with regular tree trimming.

Installing non-slip paths – such as unglazed tiles, asphalt or concrete pavers – is a great way to prevent slips and trips.

Basically our homes are hazard zones and we should all wear hard hats and hi-vis.

I’m joking of course, but adhering to these tips and tricks will certainly help to prevent your precious little ones from harm in and around your home.

•

Jeremy Wyn-Harris is the CEO of builderscrack.co.nz – a web service where homeowners and landlords can simply post the details of a job, receive interest from tradespeople and then select the most suitable for quotes. He’s a natural creative problem-solver, which comes in handy in his role as a father of three.

1 36 HOME

whaT’s most HOW SAFE WILL YOUR HOME BE IN AN EARTHQUAKE?

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ARE YOUR VALUABLES SAFE? Things you can do now to make sure your valuables are less likely to be damaged or cause harm in an earthquake: Move heavy objects to lower cupboards.

Use non-slip mats and quake wax to help keep ornaments and precious objects in place.

You could add safety catches to cupboard doors and drawers. While ‘baby-proofing’, add safety catches to higher cupboards where glasses etc could fall out.

Make sure pictures are well secured, with hook sizes sufficient to support the weight of the item and squeezed shut to keep the picture in place.

e can’t predict earthquakes, but we can prepare for them. One of the best places to start is with your home.

Whether you own your home or rent a property, find out what you can do to make your home safer for you and your family during an earthquake, and when young children begin pulling up and climbing.

IS YOUR FURNITURE FASTENED? Falling furniture, particularly tall or heavy items (bookcases, cabinets, TVs, fridges) can be a hazard during an earthquake.

Look around your home – what might topple or shift in an earthquake or other natural disaster?

Secure furniture using brackets or other fasteners to the wall or floor.

IS YOUR CHIMNEY AT RISK OF FALLING? Brick and concrete masonry chimneys may crack, shift or collapse in an earthquake, causing damage to people and property. They can topple or collapse through the roof, or fall outwards damaging other parts of your property.

Do you use your fireplace? If not, could you remove the chimney and remove an earthquake hazard?

Are there any cracks, tilts or missing bricks? Is your chimney well connected to the house?

Is there timber and ply bracing in the ceiling to help stop falling bricks from damaging your house?

We can all do something to make our homes safer, and the best time to start is now. For information, visit

eqc.govt.nz/prepare.

1 37 ADVERTORIAL

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1NATURAL OF INSTINCT 25 PACKS OF SKINCARE PRODUCTS TRANSFORM YOUR SKIN IN JUST SIX WEEKS, THE NATURAL WAY. When it comes to skin care, it’s important to choose quality products with natural ingredients that nourish your skin and are free of any harmful chemicals. Natural Instinct’s high-performing products are formulated with a naturally derived base, the finest nutrient-rich plant-derived ingredients, certified organic extracts and pure essential oils, and powerful anti-ageing ingredients to deliver proven results in just six weeks.

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Learn more at www.naturalinstinct.co.nz FULL TERMS AND CONDITIONS AVAILABLE AT OHBABY.CO.NZ/SUBSCRIBE. Competition closes on Sunday 25th November 2018 and is available to New Zealand residents only.

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GREAT GIVEAWAYS FOR YOU AND YOUR GROWING FAMILY

FAMILY FITNESS Here’s the perfect fitness prize pack for you and your little buddy! FitBit is offering one lucky parent the chance to win a Fitbit Versa valued at $349.95 and a kids’ Fitbit Ace valued at $149.95 to keep you both connected, motivated and on track with your fitness goals!

LESS MESS Dishwasher-safe, stain-resistant and made of 100% food-grade BPA-free silicone, these Make My Day bibs may just make your day! Wonderfully soft and complete with a built-in crumb catcher, they come in 22 different styles and are adjustable for sizes six months to three years old. We have 20 to give away from Baby First.

SUMMER WRAPS Babu are giving away 20 of their gorgeously soft, double-gauge organic muslin wraps – perfect for those hot summer months. Each wrap measures 110cm x 110cm, and is available in assorted designs and delicious colours. RRP$29.90.

IT’S IN THE BAG! Win these handbag essentials - and the handbag too! Valued at over $274, this Moana Road prize pack includes a 500ml Tui Bottle, Nga Taringa Headphones, Deborah Kerr glasses, Vanessa Redgrave glasses and a Roseneath bag.

LOOK MUM, NO HANDS! The Baby Bjorn Baby Carrier One Outdoors is perfect for outdoor adventures. Made of water-repellent and moisture-wicking materials, it has a pocket and loops for storage, and a sturdy waist belt and shoulder straps - ideal for getting out and about with little ones.

Baby Bjorn and Isoki have teamed up to give away one Baby Bjorn One Outdoors carrier worth $399.95 and an Isoki Backpack Nappy Bag Elliot worth $109.95.

WOODEN-T YOU KNOW! Your little one will love playing with these delightful wooden toys. Designed and manufactured in Europe, they’re hard-wearing, beautifully crafted and will be cherished for years. Bebabo are giving away five sets of the two toys.

Voila pull-along dog, RRP$34.90. Set of 30 wooden alphabet blocks, RRP$69.90.

HOW DO I ENTER THE PRIZE DRAW? All our competitions are available to enter on our website, ohbaby.co.nz/competitions. Simply answer the Giveaway Question on each entry (found on our website), pop in your details, and you’re in the draw to win.

TERMS AND CONDITIONS: Entries must include the answer to the Giveaway Question you find at ohbaby.co.nz/competitions. Only one entry per household, per competition. Competitions close 25/11/2018 and will be drawn on 3/12/2018. Prizes will be dispatched by 21/12/2018. Prizes are not transferable, not redeemable for cash, and no exchanges will be made. Prizes will be sent to a New Zealand address only. Employees of OHbaby! Ltd and their immediate families are not eligible to enter.

140 COMPETITIONS

physiotherapists

Total Mums understand the physical demands of motherhood. Your body goes through many physical changes as you experience pregnancy, labour and raising children. We provide specialist physiotherapy to pregnant women and can help minimise muscle and joint pain in pregnancy and motherhood.

09 849 7711 or visit www.totalmums.co.nz

practical parenting antenatal classes

What makes us different? We spend 50% of the time in our courses talking about what happens AFTER the baby arrives! Run by a trained midwife and a counsellor, this course is designed to prepare you and your family for birth and beyond. It’s all the information you REALLY need to know! www.practicalparentingantenatal.com

paediatrician and lactation consultant Dr Abby Baskett (FRACP, IBCLC) is a paediatrician and lactation consultant working at Starship Children’s Hospital and Kidzhealth in Auckland. Abby has a special interest in infant health, particularly feeding issues and tongue ties.

Kidzhealth: 09 524 4333 or visit www.babyworks.nz

RANZCOG

The Royal Australian and NZ College of Obstetricians and Gynaecologists is committed to excellence in the delivery of healthcare to women throughout their lives.

It does this via ongoing training of doctors, research and advocating to improve standards of care. www.ranzcog.edu.au

nutritionist

Hannah Gentile is a registered nutritionist working in private practice at Nourished by Nature - providing carers with a no fuss, evidence-based solution to their child’s eating needs. Hannah supports families from conception through to preschool with everything from starting solids to fussy eating. www.nourishedbynature.co.nz

baby whisperer With over 30 years’ experience, internationally renowned Dorothy Waide is one of New Zealand’s most knowledgeable authorities on infant and toddler care.

Dorothy’s nurturing and holistic approach to sleep, settling and eating habits is creating a generation of confident parents with content children.

Visit Dorothy at www.babyhelp.co.nz,

general paediatrician Dr Anne Tait (FRACP) is a general paediatrician working at Starship Children’s Hospital and also with Auckland Paediatrics – Auckland’s newest collaborative paediatric practice. Auckland Paediatrics are a group of seven consultant paediatricians, providing comprehensive general and subspecialty best practice paediatric care for your child.

09 638 9945 or visit www.aucklandpaediatrics.co.nz

sex and relationships

Jo Robertson is a trained counsellor with years of experience working in sexual health and now in private practice. She is currently doing her masters in science with a sex therapy focus, and is co-director of Practical Parenting Antenatal Classes. Jo is passionate about seeing couples restored in their intimacy, having healthy and pleasurable relationships. facebook.com/jorobertsonsextherapy/ or @jo.robertson

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w w w. p e r r i a m . c o . n z

20% off SPRING COLLECTION CODE : OHBABYSPRING exp 30/11/18

www.lamington.co.nz

Socks that stay up and stay on!

NZ Made | Merino Socks

Exquisite Jewellery... personalised with love www.loveloops.co.nz

On trend clothing for the modern mama www.mrssmithclothing.co.nz

www.thegatheredstore.com

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We have a dream...

Can you help us?

We are an active and financially secure married Kiwi couple in our mid-30’s, looking for a generous egg donor. We are fun and sociable, and love spending time outdoors and in the company of friends and family.

New Zealand designed and made baby and children's quilts, toys, teethers & rattles

We are a European/Indian couple, however we are open to considering all ethnicities to help us to realise our dream of becoming parents.

www.nzlittlefern.com

We have been through a lot in our thirteen years together, and after several heartbreaking unsuccessful IVF attempts and a miscarriage over the past five years, we have been told that our best chance of conceiving is through a donor egg.

View a selection from our range at

We are looking for that special woman who would be prepared to donate her eggs to us. If you are a healthy non-smoker, aged between 20-37, and have preferably completed your own family, we would love to hear from you.

www.babytrenz.co.nz

64 Adams Drive, Pukekohe, Auckland Ph 09 239 0060

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If you are interested in assisting us to parenthood, and helping us to start the family we have been longing for, please use our reference “Hopeful” using the link below.

Thank you for taking the time to read our message. www.fertilityassociates.co.nz/ pathway/becoming-a-donor

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Auckland : 1 Pompallier Tce, Ponsonby Wellington : 99 Customhouse Quay

www.bebabo.co.nz

Celebrate every occasion Partyware, Tableware Decorations, Helium Balloons Party Bags, Cake Decorating Cupcake Supplies 445 Lake Road, Takapuna, Auckland p: 09 489 8169 f: 0800 276779

www.poppyseed.co.nz

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Stop wee accidents becoming big dramas.

Waterproof bed pads with wings make changing a wet bed a breeze.

No more stripping the bed!

BrollySheets.co.nz

premium quality

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Shop online at

www.threebagsfull.co.nz or call 0800 33 33 23

Tripp Trapp Our wooden iconic Tripp Trapp® follows each new generation through their childhood and even beyond.

It grows with the child and lasts for a lifetime.

PREMIUM SUIT WITH LEGS

Discover The Chair For Life

www.dimples.co.nz

AVAILABLE AT LEADING BABY STORES

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OUR PROUDEST MOMENT:

this is us

Our family

WHAT’S NEW THIS SEASON: Foods tried:

IN SPRING Places visited:

MILESTONES: Books read:

MISCHIEF:

Movies watched:

MIRACLES:

Songs sung:

OCCASIONS WE’VE CELEBRATED:

WE’RE REALLY LOOKING FORWARD TO…

5 THINGS WE’RE GRATEFUL FOR:

5 THINGS ON OUR TO-DO LIST:

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