VOL. 20 JAN 2022
This Month's News
Parent Resources
New Operations Coordinator, End of Year Giving CultivateMN, Spirit Week
Turning Toward Our Children: Answering Bids for Connection
NURTURE. GROW. EMPOWER.
January News More yoga in Toddler 3
Movie, hot cocoa and PJ Day in Preschool 3
Index End of Year Donations, Tax Statements, Meet Samantha
05 06 07 08
2022 Closures Cultivate Mankato Spirit Week Business Membership Future Closures, Holiday Auction Upcoming Study, COVID Policies, Weather Indoor sledding fun in Infant 3
Reminder, We are Hiring Gratitude Message from Anissa Upskill Parent Resources Infant Development Center Community Room Workiversaries Menus
Playing with a giant cardboard box in Infant 4
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Parent Resource Article
03-04
09 10 11 12 13 14-15 16-17 18-20
www.cultivatemankato.com
ARE YOU LOOKING TO MAKE AN END-OF-YEAR DONATION?
THE GIFT THAT
Keeps on giving!
Please consider donating to: SUPPORT EARLY EDUCATORS
SUPPORT CHILDREN
PROFESSIONAL DEVELOPMENT
MOBILE SENSORY PROJECT
SCHOLARSHIPS
SUPPORT FAMILIES
MENTAL HEALTH SERVICES
COMMUNITY CHILD CARE FUND
DONATE TODAY www.cultivatemn.org
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www.cultivatemankato.com
How to Retrieve Tax Statements We’ve had many requests for retrieving tax statements. Procare makes it pretty easy for families to get their own, but please let me know if you have any questions. Please click the link below to view directions on how to do this. Please note, you may have to access your Procare account from a laptop to do this versus your phone.
Click Here for Instructions
Meet Samantha Our New Operations Coordinator My name is Samantha Laman and I am thrilled to have joined the Cultivate team as the Operations Coordinator! I was raised in Saint Michael, Minnesota and have always been enthralled by nature and the smaller, more fragile beings who surround us humans in our day to day lives.
My interests eventually led me into obtaining a degree in Recreation, Parks, and Leisure Services from Minnesota State University, Mankato, which allowed me to not only dive deeper into my curiosities, but also gave me the tools needed to educate others about the importance of not only taking care of themselves, but the world around them as well. I believe there is great importance and power in the emotion of awe, and that it can be the source of endless core memories for young children. I also believe that the Cultivate team has everything needed to encompass education, love, community, awe and authenticity in a way that will help create a lifetime of learning for each student and their families. Some fun facts about me are that 90% of my family lives in The Netherlands, I used to have 2 pet ducks named Jocelyn & Rolland, and scuba diving is one of my favorite vacation activities!
I am honored to have joined the Cultivate community and can't wait to see what 2022 has in store for us all!
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www.cultivatemankato.com
PARENTS
WE
NEED
YOUR
HELP
SPREADING
THE
WORD
ABOUT
THIS
MEMBERSHIP
BE THE CHANGE #supportyouremployees
CULTIVATE MANKATO CHILD CARE BUSINESS MEMBERSHIP
REMINDER!
Future Closures January 1st | New Year's Day
October 22nd | Teacher Appreciation
April 2nd | Teacher Appreciation November 25th | Thanksgiving May 31st |
Memorial Day
November 26th | Thanksgiving
July 2nd | Independence Day
December 24th | Christmas Eve
September 6th | Labor Day
December 31st | New Year's Day 2022
Thank you to those that participated in our Cultivate Mankato Holiday Auction This month as part of our Giving Back to our Community initiative, we organized an online Holiday Auction and raised $$$? for CADA! Thank you to all those that participated and to all the businesses that donated auction items: B's Bakes & Cakes, Smell the Roses Memory Creation, Wine Cat, Nicollet Bike & Ski Shop, Body Concepts, WOW!Zone, Pub 500, Hilton Garden Inn, Mankato Downtown, Mecca Tattoo, Children's Museum of Southern Minnesota, Drummers Garden Center & Floral, Bellissimo Paint and Coatings, River Rock Coffee, Giddie Skin, Sugar Belly.
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www.cultivatemankato.com
Upcoming Study
Covid-19 Policies
Within our education curriculum, we use
updated 10/18/2021
studies to guide our lesson planning. Studies are a broad concept that we focus on for 4-6 weeks. Currently our study has been all about Winter. This month we will begin our
Review and download MN Department of Health COVID-19 Decision Tree for People in Child Care Programs
Click Here
Health Study. If you feel your
family has something special to share in regards to our upcoming study, we would love family participation. Reach out!
We Are Hiring Employment Package includes: health, dental & vision insurance, retirement plan, professional development stipend, child care benefits, and other employment perks. Please share this information to help us find caring, outstanding and qualified individual to join our team!
Open Positions: Preschool Co-Lead Assistants and Supports in all programs
www.cultivatemankato.com/employment
Weather Reminder As the snow has already fallen this month, we want to remind you of our weather policy. Cultivate Mankato does not follow the district 77 weather closings. However, we may have to close if it is deemed unsafe for families and employees getting to and from Cultivate. We have only had to close early once last year so hopefully early closures will be minimal.
Some pictures from our Winter Study the last few weeks. CULTIVATE NEWS | 9
Also, please remember to bring snow boots, snow pants, hats, mittens and a coat every day. We do have some extras but our extras are limited. www.cultivatemankato.com
Message From Ms. Anissa Happy New Year!!!
THIS MONTH'S ORGANIZATION
and North Mankato. You will see more messages from me in Procare. And be
The beginning of the new year always
on the lookout for some good ol’
brings a sense of excitement for me. I
fashion fun!
set some goals and make some plans and try to find ways to be the best
During 2022 I want to grow our
version of myself. In the past I have set
Neighborhood COMMUNITY. I will be
weekly and monthly intentions with a
reaching out to our neighbors and
single word. Things like nutrition, joy,
inviting them to share their skills and
water and music; these words give me
talents with the children at Cultivate
focus for the week or month. I will
Mankato. We will add more special
continue to do these weekly and
guests to our monthly studies and take
monthly intentions, but this year I am
more field trips into the community.
also choosing a word of the year: COMMUNITY.
During 2022 I want to grow our Cultivate Mankato Team COMMUNITY.
COMMUNITY is not only a core value at Cultivate Mankato, it is a long-standing personal value of mine. I can trace it back to elementary school when I was a Brownie (Girl Scout). One of the lessons I learned all those years ago was to leave things better than I found them. That was the beginning of my desire to help others in my community.
During 2022 I want to grow our
We will deepen our connections with one another through on-going training, team celebrations and recognitions and finding ways to be playful throughout the day.
We are all a part of so many different communities. It’s exciting to think of all of the ways we can come together and strengthen our communities, making them a place to grow and thrive.
Cultivate Mankato COMMUNITY. I want
Anissa Sandland
to deepen our connections with one
Community & Culture Coordinator
another through service, through communications, and through gatherings. I will be inviting parents and families to get involved with service opportunities within Mankato
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www.cultivatemankato.com
Laura Walser, our Early Education Coordinator will be creating short parent resource videos called Upskill for $10/month.
Upcoming topics will be: Handling big emotions Emotion coaching Keeping yourself calm Bedtime routines Building independence
Some more topics that will be discussed in the future include: Biting Morning routine Teaching a skill vs consequences Multiple environments equals multiple expectations Childcare drop off and pick up routine
Click Here to Subscribe
Setting your child up for successful sleep at childcare Potty training The importance of sleep
TWO NEW VIDEOS NOW
AVAILABLE!
Knowing yourself as a parent Guiding your child’s behavior; positive discipline Language development If you have questions, please email Laura
laura.walser@cultivatemankato.com CULTIVATE NEWS | 11
www.cultivatemankato.com
Because we are at capacity, we need to expand. But we are only able to expand because of the hard work and dedication of our current infant team at Cultivate Mankato. We have created a stellar program at Cultivate Mankato, and now we plan to take what we have learned and created at our Main Street location and open an Infant Development Center. To enroll and/or to apply, visit:
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www.cultivatemankato.com www.cultivatemankato.com
s& U r e off Ref 0 2 ve $ on i e c Re uiti t r you
Community Room BEAUTIFUL EVENT SPACE FOR YOUR UPCOMING PARTY OUR COMMUNITY ROOM PROVIDES: • A large kitchen island with bar stools
• A kitchenette with a refrigerator, freezer, sink & microwave
• Tables, table clothes & matching chairs
• Access to a preschool room or an extra meeting room
• Three large windows for lots of natural lighting
• Access to bathrooms
• Beautiful artwork
ENROLLED CULTIVATE FAMILIES RECEIVE A FREE COMMUNITY ROOM RESERVATION
To reserve visit:
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www.cultivatemankato.com/community-room
www.cultivatemankato.com
CELEBRATING ONE YEAR WORK ANNIVERSARY Lizzie Rossow: Preschool 1 Lead Teacher Katie Nance: Toddler 2 Lead Teacher Sam Kuethe, Claire Rasche, Kayla Jensen: Assistant Teachers
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CELEBRATING two YEARS WORK ANNIVERSARY Adrienne Trahms, Infant Assistant Teacher (Shout out to Adrienne for being our opener, arriving at 5:45am every single morning)!
Cassandra Theriault, Infant 4 Lead Teacher
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Jan Menus
We would like to give families the opportunity to order the bread that River Rock makes for our children. There are two different options to choose from: Sourdough and Midwest Multigrain. Pick up at Cultivate in 1-2 business days.
Click the menu to download a pdf
To place an order: Visit our Cultivate Mankato shop! Questions? Email us at info@cultivatemankato.com
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www.cultivatemankato.com
We would like to give families the opportunity to order snack packs for your child(ren) or upcoming event. Choose between a meat or vegetarian option or send us a message to create a custom order. Pick up at Cultivate in 1-2 business days.
Click the menu to download a pdf
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To place an order: Visit our Cultivate Mankato shop! Questions? Email us at info@cultivatemankato.com
www.cultivatemankato.com
Parent Resource
and ready to play. Let’s make it a date!” This helps the child feel acknowledged and important. Each time you turn toward your
Turning Toward Our Children: Answering Bids for Connection By Rebecca Eanes Link to Article
child in this way, Gottman says you are making a deposit in their Emotional Bank Account. A negative response would be “Can’t you see I’m busy?” or a flat “Not now.” Too many negative responses significantly damage the relationship. No response might be a scowl and a waving away of the hand or completely ignoring that the child even spoke, which may be the most
World-renowned relationship researcher and co-founder of The Gottman Institute, Dr. John
painful response of all.
Gottman, has conducted 40 years of research
Bids are offered both verbally and nonverbally,
with thousands of people. From his research
and it isn’t always easy to discern that a bid is
has emerged a practice that is important to
being made, which is why being aware and
the emotional connection between two
positively responsive is key in building
people – the act of “turning toward” your loved
emotional connection. A toddler who holds his
one when a bid is made. What is a bid?
arms up to be picked up is making a bid for
According to Gottman, a bid is an attempt to get attention, affection, or acceptance. It is a bid for emotional connection. “Will you play with me?” is an obvious bid, but not all bids are so clear. Therefore, it is good to familiarize ourselves with what bids are and to be mindful, being on the lookout for what our children say or do that may be a bid for connection. How we respond to these bids has a great impact on the connectedness we share with our loved ones. There are 3 responses to bids: positive (turning toward), negative (turning away), and no response (turning away).
attention or affection. Poor behavior may also be a bid. How should we respond if a child makes a bid in a negative way, such as through misbehavior or a tantrum? Conventional parenting wisdom says to respond negatively so as not to reinforce the poor behavior or tantrum, but children are often doing the best they can in that moment to get their needs met. No matter if the bid comes in the form of a sweet “mommy or daddy, let’s play” or a screaming tantrum, the message is exactly the same. “Notice me. Show me I matter.” By giving a positive, loving response to the bid
Take for example a simple bid for attention.
no matter what form it comes in, we fill our
“Will you play with me?” A positive response
child’s emotional bank account and build
would either be “Yes, let’s play” or something
connection. A child with a full bank is less likely
like “Oh, I would LOVE to play with you. You
to make bids in negative ways.
are my favorite person in the whole world to play with. At 6:00, I’ll be finished with my work
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www.cultivatemankato.com
Here are some ways to “turn toward” your children when a bid is made:
Be attentive when they’re speaking to you. When we are too busy to look up and pay attention, we miss an important chance for connection. Be intentional about putting away distractions and focusing on your loved ones as often as possible.
4 Parental Behaviors to Avoid Horseman #1: Criticism Parents often use criticism in an attempt to motivate a child to do better, but criticism rarely motivates. It tears down. Criticism is pointing out something negative – basically shining a spotlight on the child’s flaws and negative traits. The problem is that, according to Dr. Julie Gottman, “kids take in all that criticism as a way of reflecting who they are.” It makes children believe
Be concerned about what they are
that there is something wrong with them. I’ve said
concerned with. Even if what they are
before that parents should be the people who see
concerned about seems trivial, showing
the best in our children and shine the spotlight on
that you are concerned because they are
their good qualities. Children can’t see and live up
builds the relationship.
to the best in themselves if we’re always pointing
Convey the message “you are known and
out the worst.
accepted” as much as you can. Avoid
Examples of Criticism:
criticism and these 3 other relationship destroyers
(see column to the right).
“You’re so clumsy.” “Why can’t you ever remember to make your bed? What is wrong with you?” “Look
Say “yes” to play. We have lots of other
at this mess! You’re too lazy to clean your room.”
things to do, but nothing more important.
“You’re spoiled rotten and don’t appreciate
Greet with enthusiasm. In the morning,
anything!”
after school, or after any extended separation, greet your children with warmth and a smile. Showing our children that we delight in them is a very simple but powerful connection builder.
What are kids really hearing in these phrases? Be more careful to not spill your drink? Please be responsible and make your bed? I’d like for you to tidy your room? I wish you were more appreciative? No. They’re hearing: You’re clumsy. You’re stupid. You’re lazy. You’re spoiled. Any
It isn’t possible to always give positive
motivation to do better is squashed under the
responses to bids, and that’s okay. The
weight of shame.
intention is to try, and when we fail, we can
The Fix:
always come back to repair by making our own bids to them. As with all relationships, it’s about the quality of connection, not the presence of perfection.
Leave out character judgments and use “I statements” to state what you want. “Oops, it spilled. I want you to get a cloth and wipe it up.” “I want you to make your bed, please.” “I want you to clean your room before you go to your friend’s house.”
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www.cultivatemankato.com
Horseman #2: Contempt
Horseman #4: Stonewalling
Contempt is criticism coming from a place of
Stonewalling is withdrawing from the conversation
superiority. It comes out as name-calling, sneering,
before everyone feels the issue is settled. I can
eye-rolling, sarcasm, hostile humor, and mockery.
think of primarily 2 instances of parental
Interestingly, contempt not only predicted how
stonewalling. One is a withdrawal of emotional
relationships would go but it predicted how many
presence when frustrated with the child. Giving a
infectious illnesses the listener would have in the
child the cold shoulder or the silent treatment is a
coming year! I can only conclude from that
form of stonewalling. The other is ending the
information that talking down to a child tears
conversation with a blatant disregard for the
down more than his self-esteem.
child’s position. “We’re not going to discuss this. My
Examples of Contempt:
decision is final.”
“Stupid brat!” “Are you ignorant? Why would you
Understandably, there are times when something
do that?” “You wouldn’t even think of picking up
is not up for discussion and the parent must put
your clothes, would you?” “Aw, look at the little
their foot down, but when this is the norm in the
baby crying again! Wah wah!”
relationship, the child feels he has no voice and no
The Fix:
one to appeal to. When children feel that their
The antidote for contempt is respect. Treat your child with the same respect you want her to treat you with.
Horseman #3: Defensiveness Defensiveness is described as a reaction against feeling personally attacked; self-protection through righteous indignation or playing the victim.
viewpoint doesn’t matter to us, they’ll eventually stop trying to communicate with us at all.
Examples of Stonewalling: Ignoring your child in an attempt to manipulate behavior. “This is not up for discussion.” “It doesn’t matter what you think. My decision is made.” “I don’t want to hear it.”
In the parent-child relationship, the parent may
The Fix:
feel defensive when he realizes he was actually in
If anger or frustration is causing you to put up an
the wrong or when a child points out the parent’s
emotional wall, then the antidote is learning
flaws (criticizes the parent). Basically,
physiological self-soothing. Take a break from the
defensiveness says “the problem is not me, it’s
conversation to calm down, then come back to it
you.” It’s avoiding taking responsibility by placing
20 minutes or so later. If you’re purposefully
blame on the child.
stonewalling in an attempt to manipulate a child’s
Examples of Defensiveness:
behavior, consider if this is a behavior you’d want
“I wouldn’t have yelled if you’d have done what you were told!” “I shouldn’t have called you stupid, BUT you made me so angry.”
The Fix: Accept responsibility for your part in the problem, and listen to how your child is feeling with an attempt to truly understand her position. “I shouldn’t have called you stupid. I’m sorry.” “I apologize for yelling. I lost my temper.”
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your child to use. Chances are you’d be pretty upset if given the silent treatment by your child until you changed your mind about letting her see that movie she wants to go to. The one tip that will help you avoid all of the 4 horsemen is to create a culture of respect in your relationship with your child. It’s not only possible to respectfully correct and discipline a child, but it is key for a healthy relationship.
www.cultivatemankato.com
Happy New Year!
FROM ALL OF US AT CULTIVATE MANKATO
FROM THE CULTIVATE MANKATO TEAM Not Pictured:
Summer Haven, Hailey Rudd, Samantha Laman