August 2020

Vol. 26 #8 August 2020

Tampa • St. Petersburg • Clearwater • Largo • Tarpon Springs . Brandon • Bradenton • Sarasota • Lakeland Plant City

FREE

Publishers: TAMPA BAY TAMMY & DJ CEO

Page 2

Dear Girlfriend, Well, it’s back to school time and I have never been so conflicted in my entire life. In my house there are 3 boys and 1 girl. My husband works from 3:30 til midnight and sometime until 2am. I’m an Economist by trade and I work from home but I used to go in at 9:00am. My job requires me to use my analytical skills and my computer skills. My husband supervises about 30 people and he complains about “babysitting” all night long. So imagine trying to homeschool kids ages, 10, 11, 13, and 15. My daughter is 13 years old and she is beginning to blossom, if you know what I mean but she’s emotional all the time. Their combined energy can be a force to reckon with, but individually I can handle them. My husband can handle their collective energy but individually he doesn’t do that well.

Homeschooling is the biggest challenge either one of us has ever attempted on top of our jobs. We are afraid to send our kids to school but we got to do something soon. We really want to homeschool but the challenge may be too much. What do you think we should do?

Signed, Bout to lose it!

Dear About to Lose It. Please don’t loose it.We don’t need you putting out 4 half raised dumb delinquents. So stay strong and open minded and know that you can do this.

Start your day with scripture “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me” and a kiss for hubby.

Make sure your children are healthy and send them back to school as soon as possible. Germs are every where and your children have to have a fighting chance. If they are not healthy, not eating right, or too fat you may need to keep them home a little longer until you get them in check. We should all be working on our hearts lungs and our immune systems to fight this virus. A healthy regimen should begin with daily walks or runs in the sun. We must get that natural vitamin D and eat something green everyday and drink something hot every night.

Remember to laugh dance, and be creative. Play as a family and require all the family to participate. Put up a volleyball net and or basketball goal With todays technology, home schooling can be so much more fun and easier, if you do not get stuck on traditionalism. .. Let’s start with you writing a schedule every Sunday evening for the week and keeping a folder on each of your children with dates.. Play Scrabble, monopoly or any game that stimulates the brain. Have daily movie time, watch Jurassic park or any movie that teach children the need to be obedient so parents can save their lives. Now is a great time to incorporate the old Disney movies in their education from the youngest to the oldest. They are excellent teaching tools. Our all time favorite was Hook, Bambi, All Dogs Go To Heaven and Alladin. Some are love stories that your teens will love (whether they admit it or not) with plenty of adult humor that will go right over the younger ones head but the older kids will get. Have them to pick who their favorite character is and why, discuss it . Always ask who is the villain ( the antagonist) who is the the hero or shero (protagonist).

This is chance to develop character in your children and to influence how they view the world. It’s your job to raise productive positive citizens and prepare them for the next level of life. Require all of them to write a paper on the lesson they learn immediately after each movie Have them read their papers out loud and then you check for errors. Once you check them have them to rewrite it and put in their folder. .

Have the kids make grocery list (spelling) and guess the cost of each item and the cost of grocery. Assign the oldest ones a day to prepare a meal, to bake and the youngest to assist reading recipes. Use the History channel, talk about current news and history at the dinner table. Try not to be too hard on each other. This is by far the best time to know your child. Take advantage of it.

Page 3 www.ntouchnews.com

We’re here for you.

The COVID-19 pandemic has exposed long-standing disparities in health care along income and racial lines.

Blacks/African Americans in some states have been stricken disproportionately by the novel coronavirus.

“Just as prevention is the key to lower cancer risk, the same holds true for lowering the risk of COVID-19—understanding how to prevent it. We have to ensure these populations are getting the necessary information to help lower their risk of the virus.”

-Dr. B. Lee Green, Vice President, Diversity, Public Relations & Strategic Communications at Moffitt Moffitt is here for the health of our patients and our community.

To learn more about how Moffitt has adapted to the pandemic to keep everyone safe, call 1-888-456-2839 or visit Moffitt.org/HereForYou.

Courageous

VICE PRESIDENT Harris!

A bold move was made by democratic Presidential Candidate Joe Biden on August 11, selecting California Attorney General, Kamala Harris as his running mate. What a historic day for women around the world and especially women of color. Finally, the U.S. has a forward momentum with this presidential election.

The United States has always been a melting pot but always subjected to glass ceilings. Well on Tuesday, several glass ceilings were cracked.

Senator Kamala Harris is a many of firsts, as a VP candidate.

As the daughter of immigrants, with her parents being from India and Jamica, she is the first Black woman to be selected. She is the first HBCU gradutate, Howard University to be specific. She is the First Black Greek. Kamala is a member of the greek sorority, Alpha Kappa Alpha. She is also a member of the social organiziation of prestigiousBlack women, the LINKS. For the past three and a half years we have had such a backwards feel to the country that it is exciting to know that we have a forward thinking presidential candidate that can actually make America great again.

Seems crazy for me to use Trump’s slogan for Joe Biden but it is truly appropo. after Trump attempted to dismantle every advancement made

by President Obama as well as our governmental agencies all while courting Russian dictator Vladimir Putin.

As an African American we have always been held to a higher standard to be considered or included in high

places. Kamala has been the best as she has aggressively fought to win in all aspects of her professional life.

So, what will it mean to have an African American as Vice President of the United States of America?

From, a historical perspective we can look back on what it meant to have an African American as President.

When Barack Obama became President, twice, he gave the country a spirit of change and hope. Joe Biden and Kamala bring a second wave of the dynamic duo kind of thing that Joe and Barack had, A Kamala Harris selection has reignited a spirit of hope and unity.

I think about Ta-nihisi Coates book, “We Were 8 years In Power”. We are on the precipice of having 8-12 more years of power and the possiblities are endless. You will see a return of America’s leadership on the world’s stage. You will see an increase for inclusion of African American men and people of color in true decision making postions to right ship our country. I beleve Elizabeth Warren and Susan Rice will have powerful positions in this administration. You will see a phenomenal push in the African American community to gain footing in an unprecedented manner.

We will see an increase in the Democratic Party from men and women jumping ship from the Republican and Independent parties. Make no mistake that while the Democratic Party is the progressive party of the 21st century, it will take more than being in power to change the systemic issues that affect people of color.

However this is a damn good start.

WE MUST VOTE!

Page 5

Page 6

The Power of the Passport How the 14th Amendment Guaranteed African Americans U.S. Citizenship the Right to Travel Abroad “All persons born or naturalized in the United States, [including former slaves who were freshly freed after the Civil War under the 13th amendment via the Emancipation Proclamation.] and subject to the jurisdiction thereof, are citizens of the United States and of the state wherein they reside.” In light of those words, either a birth certificate or a naturalization certificate is all that is needed to prove U.S. citizenship and to gain all the rights that come along with it—to vote, to hold public office, and to enter and remain in the United States.”

On July 28, 2020, the United States marks 152 years since the adoption of the 14th Amendment in 1868, and for African Americans, this Reconstruction Act was a watershed moment, which laid the framework, although hugely imperfect, for a legal basis for citizenship grounded in equal protection and, in theory, the right to own and travel on a passport.

In an era where African Americans now have the right to fly from Thailand to Timbuktu to “flex for the ‘gram,” one can easily forget that this privilege was severely contested and threatened just in the last century. For the average American in the 21 st century, the only barrier to traveling internationally is cost.

[1] Not so for Madame C.J. Walker, the first African American woman to be a selfmade millionaire in the United States.

In 1919, she attempted to travel to the Versailles Conference in France to be an alternate delegate of the National Equal Rights League.

[2] However, because of her activism against lynching and other forms of violence in the South, she was denied a U.S. passport, the only document next to a state-issued birth certificate that is evidence of citizenship for a person born on U.S. soil.

[3] The infamous Dred Scott Decision of March 1857 explicitly denied American citizenship to former slaves and their descendants, even to those who lived as free people. It was Supreme Court Chief Justice Robert Taney who said that

Black people were “an inferior order, and altogether unfit to associate with the white race, either in social or political relations, and so far inferior that they had no rights which the white man was bound to respect.”

One of the most severe consequences of the Dred Scot Decision was that it set a legal precedent for the denationalization of all African Americans and enforced regulation on black travel overseas, leaving some free Black Americans who held previously-issued passports in limbo on their trips abroad. The passports, now invalidated by the Dred Scott Decision, were replaced with “certificates” that confirmed the holder’s birth in the United States.

[4] In the Court opinion Justice Taney delivered at Dred Scott’s trial, he outlined the distinction between being entitled to a state-issued certificate versus being entitled to a passport and the significance each designation carried. “…We must not confound the rights of citizenship which a State may confer within its own limits, and the rights of citizenship as a member of the Union. It does not by any means follow, because he has all the rights and privileges of a citizen of a State, that he must be a citizen of the United States.”

Denying Madame C.J. Walker a passport gave her entry to an elite club of Black intellectuals who were denied overseas travel on the similar grounds. [5] In October 1857, the

Liberator, an abolitionist newspaper published by William Lloyd Garrison reported on a passport refusal concerning Thomas Howland, an African American attempting to travel to Liberia for business.

Despite Howland being the first African American elected to public office in the city of Providence, Rhode Island, upon applying for a passport, he received a letter stating, “passports are not issued to persons of African extraction. Such persons are not deemed citizens of the United States.” [6] Two years later, in 1859, Frederick Douglass was denied a passport to travel to France from England on the grounds that he was not a U.S. citizen.

It was not until the adoption of the 14 th Amendment that African Americans were explicitly granted full citizenship and equal protection under the law. Recent events from the 1960’s Civil Rights Movement to the protests in 2020, prove that the 14th Amendment was only a step and not a major leap toward racial equality. The imperfection of the 14 th Amendment was embodied in the practice of denying black passports to critics of racial discrimination even after the amendment’s adoption. [7] Even internationally-known black leaders such as Paul Robeson and W.E.B. Du Bois were denied passports to travel to Ghana in 1958.

The amendment did, however, create the legal ramifications by which African Americans could theoretically and constitutionally travel on an American passport, a right that had been denied to many black lives that mattered previously. [8] Despite the consequential flaws of the 14th Amendment, there would have been no constitutional basis for the Civ-

FOR MORE on the Hayes visit

U.S. Diplomats Calvin & Kindall Hayes il Rights Act of 1964 or the Voting Rights Act of 1965 without it.

Despite that current right to travel abroad freely, an overwhelming majority of African Americans do not hold passports. Those numbers are even more alarming for African Americans who study abroad. [9] The 2019 Open Doors Report noted that just under seven percent of African Americans studied abroad in 2018 compared to 70 percent of Caucasians that traveled abroad in the same year.

The passport itself reaffirms your right to citizenship guaranteed by the 14 th Amendment and recognizes the sacrifices of African Americans who came before us and fought for the ability to travel beyond the boundaries of the United States.

The founders of the HayesXChange podcast implore you to exercise your constitutional right to own a passport and for African American students to prioritize studying and interning abroad. If you are a Black American, full-time high school or university student enrolled in a four-year institution in the state of Florida, you can apply for a scholarship to cover the fees for your passport application at hayesxchange.com/passportinitiative.

The views expressed in this article are those of the authors and do not reflect the official policy or position of the US Government.

www.hayesxchange.com Page 7

A Two Candidate Race: Joe Biden or Donald Trump?

As a Result of this Election One of them will be President.

Thanks DC David Warr for Sharing

30 Reasons You Are Voting!

1. You are voting to stop the dismantling of the State Dept, and the governmental agencies that employ our middle class such as the U.S. Postal Service.

2. You're voting for the next Secretary of Education, Housing Secretary and Attorney General.

3. You are voting for the "down" ballot, as well.to keep the House and to gain majority of the Senate in Congress.

4. You're voting for federal judges.

5. You're voting for the rule of law.

6. You're voting for saving national parks.

7. You're voting for letting kids out of cages.

8. You're voting for clean air and clean water.

9. You're voting for scientists to be allowed to speak and do something to protect us from climate change and pandemics.

10 You're voting for greater transparency and confidence that the President isn't using your tax dollars as a slush fund for his family and friends.

11. You're voting for housing rights.

12. You're voting for former incarcerated persons to be treated with dignity and assisted to be proud and productive members of society when they return.

13. You're voting for everyone to be able to adopt a child without a lot of red tape.

14. You're voting for Dreamers.

15. You're voting so that there will be Social Security and Medicare when you retire...and in your children's future.

16 You're voting for veterans to get the care they deserve.

17. You're voting so that everyone can have access to affordable health insurance.

Page 8

18. You’re voting for rural hospitals.

19. You're voting for teaching to be treated like the noble profession that it is and for teachers to be paid like the heroes they are.

20 You're voting to have a President who doesn't embarrass this country every time he attends an international meeting.

21. You're voting against allowing the USA to become yet another authoritarian regime.

22. You're voting for sensible gun laws.

23. You're voting for children born to Military Troops overseas to still be counted as US citizens.

24. You’re voting to curb homelessness and find solutions to affordable housing.

25. You’re voting to take measures to end the racial asset and wealth disparities.

26. You're voting to defend women's reproductive rights and a woman's right to make all health related decisions regarding her body.

27. You're voting to acknowledge the humanity and protect the safety of our family and friends in the LGBTQ+ community.

28. You're voting to stop the normalization of white supremacy and dangerous bigotry in the mainstream.

29. You're voting to rebuild a functional CDC to help prevent or eradicate dangerous pandemics like the coronavirus.

30. You’re voting to prevent a 7-2 dangerous conservative majority on the Supreme Court. Note: 87 year old Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg is single-handedly fighting off all 10 plagues so she can hang on until we have a new president.

This alone should be enough for historic turnout! Save Our Country Vote

A CIVIL RIGHTS VOICE FROM THE PAST

By Author Activist Ron Carver deny that racism is a deepI was naive until I rooted cultural norm that wasn’t. Just eighteen, on spans America from coast the day after I graduated to coast from Minneapolis from high school, I drove to Mississippi. And from from Boston to Atlanta, the early years of our naGeorgia to work as an tion right up to the present. assistant to Julian Bond, Cops are given impunity, then the communications if not encouragement, to director for the Student Nonviolent Coordinating Commit- take out their aggression on blacks and black men in particular. tee (SNCC).

Two weeks later in the late after- We must revive the practice of the noon of June 21, we got word that 1930’s when the NAACP would three young civil rights workers, hang a banner declaring another James Chaney, Mickey Schwerner black man was lynched on a flagpole and Andrew Goodman never re- reaching out over Fifth Avenue in turned from what the folks in the New York City. And now less than a Meridian, Mississippi voter registra- century later, we must do more.

We cannot leave it to others to protion office thought would be a routine investigation of the burning of a test or demand swift punishment. black church near Philadelphia, Mis- We must demand more than investigations and firings. We must finally sissippi.

I was working the nightshift that make racist aggression socially and day and spent the first part of the legally unacceptable. We must comevening calling jails, hospitals, State mit to prison those who commit these Police and the FBI searching for the crimes. And we must insist that they young men. At midnight, I tearfully serve in maximum security facilities, called their parents to report our fail- not country club, minimum security facilities along with politicians and ure in finding them.

Though that night the FBI refused white-collar criminals. to help, the next day President John- And we must also end mass incarcerson ordered them to join the search. ation, and the current bond system, Johnson later deployed Navy sea- and the disenfranchisement of those men to drag the nearby rivers and who have served their time, and all the Bogue Chitto swamps where of the legal and social structures they uncovered the bodies of ten that have continued to discriminate more black men. For in those days, against and harm the souls and the lynching was common but no longer pocketbooks of the previously enthe community entertainment it had slaved citizens of America, a country built on the backs of milllions of men been a few decades earlier.

With the latest murder of an un- and women brought to our shores in armed black man, we can no longer chains. This work is past due.

Children’s Board of Hillsborough County 3 Ways To Keep Babies Safe And Healthy Parents are flooded with advice from the moment they tell friends and family they are expecting a baby. There are opinions and tips on diapers and doulas, nursing and nannies, bedtimes and baby food.

Something parents don’t often hear from others: Accidental drowning, unsafe infant sleep and abusive head trauma are the top causes of preventable deaths for babies and young children in the Tampa Bay area. These deaths are 100% preventable.

Three tips that can save a child’s life: 1) Close supervision is the best protection from accidental drowning.

Most children who drown in a nearby pond or pool were last seen inside the house, and parents thought the children were napping or playing inside. Install door alarms that alert you when your child goes outside your home, and designate a “water watcher” who pays close attention while children are near water.

2) The safest way for babies to sleep is Alone, on their Backs in a Crib. Infants are 40 times more likely to die in an adult bed than in a crib. Place your baby’s crib or a bassinet in your room while they are an infant. It offers the same benefits of bonding without the risks.

3) Shaking a baby – even once – can be fatal. Surprisingly, parents are most often responsible for abusive head trauma. They don’t mean to hurt the child, but they don’t know how to cope with a stressful situation. It’s okay to step away when overwhelmed or frustrated by a crying baby. Place the infant safely on their back in the crib and step out of the room to regroup.

Even one preventable child death is too many. Parents, grandparents, caregivers, family and friends can prevent an accidental death.

Learn more about these life-saving tips at PreventNeedlessDeaths. com.

To receive your paper digitally, click the Subscribe button at n-touchnews.com Page 9

Page 10

You Heard It From ME I often wonder what’s in Donald Trump that would make people select him to represent them for four more years. I listen to my Republican friends on how he has done such a great job. I look in their faces and you can see they don’t even believe what they’re saying. I look at the Senate under the leadership of Mitch McConnell and realize that these men and women are under a tremendous amount of pressure from SOMEBODY to have one voice, no matter who they destroy.

The Republicans have maintained that one voice but it has been at the expense of the American people and our goverrnmental institutions. . .

So no infrastructure in 12 years!

Can you believe it? Our country is falling apart physically, spiritually, emotionally, politically and inspirationally all because Mitch McConnell has stalled the growth of this country to block the first Black president Barack Obama. I belive in their quiet moments they have to feel a bit embarassed and ashamed Now, all other countries are catching up with us or passing us by but the men running the American Senate seem to be there for one reason, to keep the power central to white America.

More than 20 years ago, a reporter at N-TOUCH wrote a story about how the Republican Party would gut the voting rights act, focus on judges and form an alliance with the Russians. Of course these were allegations based on anothers reporting but fast forward to today and it looks

like perhaps, she was right.

So here we are today with our President seemingly in a love affair with the President of Russia. His supporting cast, the Senate, also appear to have a love affair with Russia.

The reasoning behind the love affair as I understand it is the two races can come together to become one.

The problem is the belief systems of a great majority of white Americans is that of a Democracy. So the question is, does this Senate want to do away with the Democracy or Republic and move toward Communism?

Keeping Putin and Russia in the forefront helps to soften the hearts and minds of those white Americans that may be on the fence for White Supremacy. Others will never give way to an Authoritarian type government but it’s all about the survivability of the caucasion race. From Putin’s perspective, his goal is to get into the fabric of American Society and be an ally instead of an enemy.

However one has to wonder why Putin would be putting bounties on our American soldiers.

As an African American I wonder how this fits in my equation. The truth of the matter is, it doesn’t. An authoritation type of government will not protect my interest or the interest of my people. Not to say that our Democracy has done any better, but I know what it offers and I at least have a dog in that fight to improve the rights of African Americans in this country. So one has to wonder, what is the right equation for us?

You+Ballot=Vote. Stay Woke!

THAP HELPING THE COMMUNITY During this difficult time of the Corona Virus Pandemic, the staff at 5508 has held a food give away for the East Tampa Community. The month of July and August, THAP has helped to feed families in the midst of massive unemployment, sick family members and quarantined kin folk. In collaboration with the non-profit Victiorious Living, the our neighbors can eat and feel safe.

Barbara J. Pittman

Law Offices of Barbara J. Pittman, P.A.

(813)269-9706 Fax (813)960-0601

Cypress Point Office Park 10012 N. Dale Mabry Suite 211 Tampa, Florida 33618 • • • •

Criminal Defense Family Law Personal Injury Sports Law

The hiring of a lawyer is an important decision that should not be based solely upon advertisement.

Before you decide, ask us to send you FREE written information about our qualifications and experience.

1409 W. Thonotosassa Rd. Plant City, Fl. 33566

(813) 719-6605

Moore

Williams

One on One Consultation From Start to Successful Conclusion

Accidental Death Auto/Motorcycle Accidents Permanent Disabilities Nursing Home Negligence Slip & Falls

www.williamsandmoorelaw.com

The hiring of a lawyer is an important decision that should not be based solely upon advertisement.

Before you decide, ask us to send you written information about our qualifications and experience.

Page 11

Entreprenuers

Booth Rental Available

Master Barber Ben

@ Foster’s

Barber Shop 1923 W. Main Tampa Fl. 33607 813-389-0480

(813) 323-5714

Big Al’s Precious Hair & Barber Shop 5617 E. Adamo Drive Unit 2 Tampa, Florida 33619

Register today for an upcoming class 4 hour course for initial HIV/AIDS (813) 630-9579

5302 19th St. at Hillsborough Ave Tampa, Fl

Now Hiring: Barbers Braiders & Stylist

Alvin Walker Owner/Stylist 813 376-0503

3 Convenient Locations

Page 12

N-Touch News

The Safe Use Of Alcohol-Based Hand Sanitizers To protect yourself and others against COVID-19, clean your hands frequently and thoroughly. Use alcohol-based hand sanitizer or wash your hands with soap and water. If you use an alcohol-based hand sanitizer, make sure you use and store it carefully.

- Apply a coin-sized amount on your hands. There is no need to use a large amount of the product.

- Avoid touching your eyes, mouth and nose immediately after using an alcohol-based hand sanitizer, as it can cause irritation.

- Hand sanitizers recommended to protect against COVID-19 are alcohol-based and therefore can be flammable. Do not use before handling fire or cooking.

- Keep alcohol-based hand sanitizers out of children’s reach. Teach them how to apply the sanitizer and monitor its use.

- Under no circumstance, drink or let children swallow an alcohol-based hand sanitizer. It can be poisonous.

Remember that washing your hands with soap and water is also effective against COVID-19.

AUTO INJURY REHABILITATION ACUPUNCTURE CHIROPRACTIC

www.tampaspineandwellness.com doctor@tswchiro.com

(813) 331-5753 205 W. MLK Blvd Suite 102 Tampa, FL 33603 Page 13

Go Ahead and Get your Laugh On Late Night Driving

Late one night, a preacher was driving on a country road and had a wreck.

A farmer stopped and said, “Sir, are you okay?” The preacher said, “Yes, I had the Lord riding with me.” The farmer said, “Well, you better let him ride with me, because you’re gonna kill him.”

Grocery Shopping

Two guys, one old, one young, are pushing their carts around the grocery store when they collide. The old guy says to the young guy, "Sorry about that. I'm looking for my wife, and I guess I wasn't paying attention to where I was going." The young guy says, "That's OK, it's a coincidence. I'm looking for my wife, too...

I can't find her and I'm getting a little desperate." The old guy says, "Well, maybe I can help you find her... what does she look like?" The young guy says, "Well, she is 27 yrs. old, tall, with red hair, blue eyes, is buxom wearing no bra, long legs, and is wearing short shorts. What does your wife look like?' To which the old guy says, "Doesn't matter, --- let's look for yours."

Sexually Transmitted

Doc, I think my son has VD,” a patient told his urologist on the phone, “The only woman he’s screwed is our maid.”

“Okay, don’t be hard on him. He’s just a kid,” the medic soothed, “Get him in here right away and I’ll take care of him.”

“But I’ve been screwing the maid too, and I’ve got the same symptoms he has.”

“Then you come in with him and I’ll fix you both up,” replied the doctor.

“Well,” the man admitted, “I think my wife has it too.”

“Oh crap!” the physician roared, “That means we’ve all got it!”

My Stepmother

My step mother came to me and demanded that I take all her clothes off.

So I took off her blouse. She said, “Now off with my skirt.” I did, and she continued, “Now take off my stockings.” And when I did that, she said, “Now my bra and the panties.”

I took them off. She continued, “And don’t ever let me catch you wearing my stuff again!”

Stalking

My best friend called and said, “I fear my neighbor may be stalking me, she’s been googling my name. I saw it clearly last night on her computer.

How? I asked.

Through my binoculars! he shouted.

Cheaters

A young blonde woman fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself. The hysterical blonde tells her husband: “Shut up ... you’re next!”

Titles

A person helping a criminal evade law before he’s arrested is called an accomplice.

A person helping a criminal evade law once he’s been arrested is called a lawyer.

Working Immigrants

Three men are riding to work on just one motorcycle. They pass a police patrol. The policeman shouts after them: “Police! Stop your vehicle now!”

But they just continue driving past.

The last man turns around and yells: “Sorry dude! We can’t take you on, we’re already one too many!”

The police stop an old guy in questionable condition at 1 am. “What are you doing out so late, sir?” asks the police officer. “I’m going to a seminar on ‘The harmful effects of alcohol’,” replies the man. “Are you pulling my leg or something?!“ ask the police officer, „who would hold a seminar like that at this hour?! It’s Anonymous

Dinner

There’s that moment when you put your steak on the grill and your mouth waters all over from that amazing smell. Do you vegans feel the same when you mow the grass.

Keep On Laughing... Laughter Heals!

Men vs Women

A man is reading his newspaper and says to his wife: “Michelle, look.

Here is an article about how women use about twice as many words per day as men do.” The wife responds: “That’s because we have to tell you everything twice”

Men’s Wear, Women’s Wear, Stretch Jeans, Belts, Buckles, Beauty Supplies, Sneakers, Caps, Socks, Thermal Wear, Novelties, Oils Serving Tampa Bay for over 30 Years

The Death Certificate

Well walking through the hall of thenhospital I over herard the Doctor yells at nurse: I’m telling you one last time, “when you are filling out the death certificate, you put the name of the illness under cause of death, not the name of the doctor.

Policing the Old

The Official Limousine of Tampa Bay Tammy

Page 15

Page 16