Northeast Ohio Parent Magazine - May 2020

MAY 2020 • FREE!

Celebrate Graduates Let's Make it Special

Self-Care for Moms De-stress & Rejuvenate

Growing Hearts Foster Care Support

KEEPING SPIRITS HIGH Mental Health Month NortheastOhioParent.com

Helping Families Cope and Stay Strong Together May 2020 - NortheastOhioParent.com

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2 | Family Living at Its Best

May 2020 - NortheastOhioParent.com

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May

insiDE

NortheastOhioParent.com

features

26

LAST CALL FOR CAMPS & SUMMER PROGRAMS

16

HONOR YOUR GRAD

Ways to make up for missed graduation, prom and other rites of passage.

42

GROWING HEARTS

Foster parents face unique challenges.

departments 06

Mental Health Month 32

WINDS OF CHANGE

Uncharted territory brings focus on kids’ mental health.

36

DISRUPTIVE BEHAVIORS

Making sense of kids aggressive or disruptive actions.

37

EXPLORING THERAPY

Parents need to prioritize their mental health.

EDITOR’S NOTE All together now.

38

7 WAYS TO CELEBRATE MOM

Because one day in May is not enough.

08

WORTH NOTING Telehealth takes the stage, plus Reading Room, Teddy Bear Hunts and more.

11

TECH TALK

Sorting out screen time during a pandemic.

12

EDUCATION View from homeschool, plus some ways to show appreciation for teachers!

47

AGING ANSWERS

Staying connected with grandparents even when apart.

50

#CLEMAMA

Finding the silver lining.

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May 2020 - NortheastOhioParent.com

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VOL. NO. 7 • ISSUE NO. 05

May 2020 Northeast Ohio Parent is a property of

PO Box 1088 Hudson, OH 44236 330-822-4011 NortheastOhioParent.com PUBLISHER - Brad Mitchell

brad@northeastohioparent.com 330-714-7712 EDITORIAL:

EDITOR - Angela Gartner

angela@northeastohioparent.com 216-536-1914 ASSISTANT EDITOR - Brandon Szuminsky

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6 | Family Living at Its Best

PHOTO BY PRELUDE PHOTOGRAPHY

Editor's NOTE

All Together Now It’s funny what you can rediscover in quarantine, especially if it’s been collecting dust in your room.

In our family, sports had been our life — it was a long youth hockey season and a highly-anticipated baseball season (we are still waiting) — so it’s kind of odd to be all together at home.

Before our kids or youth sports came along, my husband and I were in a local band. I was the bassist and he was on lead guitar. Our band days drifted off when we had our family, and my bass guitar went unplayed for years.

Recently, we dusted our guitars off (literally) and plugged-in to jam, but this time we have a new drummer — our 11-year-old son. It was louder than I remembered but also relaxing and gave our family a chance just to recharge. And now we have the start of a song.

In this time of lockdown, we are still juggling our workloads, the new school day and taking care of our children — all while having anxieties about what’s happening: Will it ever be normal? How is my child handling this? — so, in this issue, we want to share stories about how to cope and unwind.

As we look ahead to our futures with COVID-19, we want to talk about mental health for parents and kids.

Also, we provide ways to not feel alone by sharing stories from some moms pulled into the homeschooling trenches.

My fifth-grader is transitioning into middle school next year, and he didn’t get that rite of passage like his brother. No graduation, clap-out, fifth-grade trip, pool party and a shirt signed by all his friends. I don’t get to say good-bye either, to six years (twice!), to an elementary school of wonderful teachers, PTA members and principals.

As I will, hopefully, be able to see my child walk down the aisle at his senior graduation, many parents are missing that opportunity with their teens.

That’s why we want to provide you with some unique ways to make your senior feel special. Also, look for the wonderful messages of families who are celebrating their grads in this issue.

Just because we are home, doesn’t mean we can’t have fun — and take some time-out for ourselves too. We provide suggestions on how moms can destress and rejuvenate every day.

With me and my husband getting back into music and our instruments, it has helped us to recapture a piece of our old selves. It also has brought us closer as a couple — and for our sons, they get to learn something new about their parents — we really can play.

We hope everyone stays well and safe!

Making Meaningful Connections For Your Family Summit DD works with families to meet the unique needs of each child. We connect little ones to the support they need to reach their full potential. Our team of early childhood professionals is there to assist families every step of the way with their child’s learning and development.

Find out more about how Summit DD is making meaningful connections for families ‌ one child at a time.

SummitDD.org

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May 2020 - NortheastOhioParent.com

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Worth NOTING

The New Home Doctor Visit INCREASINGLY POPULAR TELEHEALTH APPROACH PROVIDES SAFE AT-HOME OPTION

By Angela Gartner

“Can you see me?”

“I am here.”

“Let’s begin your health appointment.”

This is how a conversation might start between a doctor and a family who are not physically together in an office but separated just by a screen.

Doctors can provide their patients a health portal from a smart device where they can assess health conditions, provide therapy and more. This type of home treatment is rapidly on the uptick.

With the outbreak of COVID-19, it became increasingly clear that telehealth could be used instead of the typical face-to-face appointment.

“We are dealing with a public health issue, especially for people with preexisting conditions,” says Dr. Steven Spalding, vice president of population health and pediatric rheumatologist at Akron Children’s Hospital. “We want to keep those families and kids in a safe controlled environment, and it turns out the best place for this is at home.”

APPOINTMENTS IN A HOME SETTING If you are new to telemedicines, you are not alone. This type of health service is not a new tool, but it hasn’t been widely offered.

Spalding says the national landscape for telehealth has been growing slowly, but steadily over time.

In fact, for Akron Children’s Hospital, it has been extending telehealth options since 2018 with initial offerings for the behavioral health group, according to Spalding.

He recently has been able to use this service for pediatric rheumatology patients and feels it allows them to learn different aspects about each other “The families get to see their doctor in a different setting,” he says. “I get to see them in their home setting. It’s a whole different experience: less formal, more personal and more real.”

8 | Family Living at Its Best

Jennell Vick, executive director at Cleveland Hearing & Speech Center, says the center was offering this telehealth appointment for specific adult clients but has now launched this service for children.

“For a parent, telehealth services are highly individualized,” she says, adding it bridges that barrier between home and an in-office visit and allows parents to use the activities taught in the family session right into their daily lives.

“Parents and caregivers are an integral part of any therapy,” she says. “This is a wonderful way (therapists) can incorporate or observe things that are familiar to (patients).”

Both Vick and Spalding agree.

The doctor or therapist can not only connect with patients but also other members of the family who might not be present at in-office appointments.

IS TELEHEALTH THE FUTURE? While stay-at-home orders are being lifted for some healthcare this month, it doesn’t mean telehealth services will go away.

According to Medicare.gov, it had temporarily expanded its coverage of telehealth services to respond to the current public health emergency.

A person interested in telehealth would have to check with their private insurer.

Some private insurance companies, depending on individual health plans, already covered these types of services; however, others may not.

“If (someone) is curious, they should call the doctor’s office,” Spalding says, adding to ask about the technology requirements, billing, such as co-pay, etc.

These services don’t always have to be on a smart device either. Many doctors are conducting phone calls to patients.

Spalding says this telehealth is providing access to patients who live in rural areas or those with transportation issues.

While this might not work for all health practices or people who would still prefer the in-office visit, it does provide an opportunity to use technology to assess health.

“There are some cases the technology is (still) catching up,” Spalding says. “The doctors can’t lay their hands on patients, so they have to get creative.”

He notes surgeons have adopted this to check in on patients post-surgery and patients and doctors are using available technology like smart watches provide opportunities to check different vitals.

Patients can also take their vitals by simple techniques like a thermometer to check for a fever or make sure to have a home scale for weight.

Vick says telehealth really eliminates the barriers to access to care and expects it to be part of the future at Cleveland Hearing and Speech Center.

“Telepractice has been a thrust in the right direction,” she says. “The most important thing, whether in-person or teletherapy, is learning how to apply the techniques and strategies that any therapist or physician has directed.”

Spalding adds we now have a population who has experience with this type of healthcare.

“It’s going to be hard to put the toothpaste back in the tube,” he says.

Families are Going on Teddy Bear Hunts in Their Neighborhoods

By Angela Gartner

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Christina Ellis and her 4-yearold daughter, Laceygail, put a big stuffed dog with floppy ears in the window of their North Olmsted home.

Ellis says her daughter wanted people who saw the stuffed pooch to see that he was licking the window.

Like other families, they are participating in a movement taking place across the U.S. to put teddy bears (or other stuffed animals) in windows that can be visible from the sidewalk or roadway.

During this COVID-19 outbreak, where physical distancing is essential to prevent infections, kids and parents can safely play this scavenger hunt game of finding or counting stuffed animals they see in windows or front porches by taking a drive or walk around the neighborhood.

Social media has various pages for Teddy Bear Hunts, such as Bear Hunt of Ohio on Facebook.

Ellis says she found out about the game on Facebook and the highest number of stuffed animals they counted by just driving around the North Olmsted area was 162.

“I think it’s really nice and it’s giving the kids something to do,”

Northeast Ohio Parent Magazine's Calendar Will be Online This Month!

Due to the coronavirus pandemic, many of the region's happenings have been postponed.

Check out event updates at NortheastOhioParent.com in May.

she says, adding it also helps the family by taking their minds off the current world situation.

“I just want her to be a kid and not worry about anything,” she says of her daughter.

“It’s something to look forward to and get excited about.”

Ellis said the family also has been doing board games, handson science projects and crafts.

Neighbors are practicing social and physical distancing around Northeast Ohio, but many are getting creative to help people deal with the impact of COVID-19.

There are encouraging signs in windows with messages such as “Alone Together” or “Stay Healthy.” Others have been creating colorful sidewalk chalk art with positive symbols. Some also have been using this opportunity to thank essential workers such as those in the healthcare industry.

“We are all doing our part,” Ellis says, adding activities like the Teddy Bear Hunt are helping to bring the community together.

Christina Ellis and her 4-year-old daughter, Laceygail, put a big stuffed dog with floppy ears in the window of their North Olmsted home for their neighborhood Teddy Bear Hunt.

PHOTO SUBMITTED

BY CHRISTINE ELLIS

ONLINE IN MAY NORTHEASTOHIOPARENT.COM If you love our monthly magazine, be sure to visit our website for even more great content you won’t find anywhere else.

CONTENT FOR KIDS

As parents seek at-home ways to educate and entertain their children, many area museums, libraries and attractions have stepped up to produce kid-friendly videos and virtual fun. We compile the best of these offerings and post them on our site as KidStream videos.

GIFT CARD GIVEAWAYS

Throughout the entire month of May, we’ll be giving away $50 gift cards to First & Main in Hudson and Pinecrest in Orange Village. Go to our website each week on Tuesday and Friday to look for the entry form!

LOCAL BLOGGERS

Our blogger lineup covers a range of topics, from finance and DIY projects to parental advice and finicky toddler phases. Click on the “Bloggers” tab on our site to view the latest posts.

May 2020 - NortheastOhioParent.com

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Worth NOTING

READINGROOM

‘Baby Paleontologist’ (Baby Scientist Series No. 4)

by Dr. Laura Gehl

Baby Scientist is an adorable board book series that brings fun, accessible science concepts to the baby’s world using simple language, recognizable settings and vibrant art.

‘Just Like Me’

By Vanessa Brantley-Newton

An ode to the girl with scrapes on her knees and flowers in her hair, and every girl in between, this exquisite treasury will appeal to readers of “Dear Girl” and “I Am Enough” and have kids poring over it to find a poem that’s just for them.

‘Never Let A Unicorn Get Spots!’

by Diane Alber

Let’s Celebrate May!

Visit NortheastOhioParent.com

for at-home activity ideas, seasonal fun and parenting advice.

10 | Family Living at Its Best

“Never Let A Unicorn Get Spots” is about a little girl who wakes up one day to her Unicorn covered in spots. She has to find a solution and quick before these spots keep spreading.

Also, look for her book “A Little SPOT of Kindness!” to help kids spread

Tech TALK

Managing Technology Over-Consumption During Lockdown

P

erhaps you are like many parents right now: dealing with a child or adolescent who is doing schoolwork at home and you are trying to manage a job, a household, other children, etc. — all at the same time.

Children and adolescents are on computers for hours and hours each and every day doing schoolwork, virtually visiting with friends and then playing video games or using social media.

Many parents in the U.S. are dealing with children and adolescents who have technology over-consumption — yet sorting it out from healthy use becomes even more important in today’s world.

How is a parent to manage in these uncertain times?

1. Talk to the child and teach a healthy balanced lifestyle. What does this mean?

Technology today is non-removable from our society. So, what we are teaching is smart devices or phones isn’t bad, but we are teaching healthy uses. It is a good time for board games, card games, watch movies, etc., where there is a balance in other activities in their life, including taking walks, exercising, etc.

2. Have your child and yourself set a schedule for the day. Many children are learning executive function skills, organization and time management (on the fast track) that they have not done before.

Helping them get organized and helping them set an amount of time that they will be on their games or on social media gives them a “perception of control.” Trying to enforce your ideas on them without including their ideas first is probably a bad plan.

3. Socialization is important, especially as children become adolescents. I am spending each day doing telehealth with many children and adolescents and a lot of them are feeling anxiety, depression and social isolation, even if they are in contact with their friends. Thus, I think having them be in touch with their friends is an important aspect of growth, socially and emotionally, although it is not the same

By Dr. Jay Berk as being in a group of their peers in a non-virus time.

4. Limit hours. This means a few things.

Limiting the hours they are on the electronics, i.e., how much time; limit the hours they can go on the electronics, i.e., not past 11 o’clock; and limit what apps, websites, etc., you are comfortable with. It is often a good idea if you have a younger child or adolescent to make sure you have the computer, phone, etc., at nighttime plugged in where you can see it or it is in your room waiting for the child the next day.

5. Have the child or adolescent do work while you are doing your work from your setting, if they need to manage their time.

It is easy for children to disappear into the room never to be seeing the light of day while parents are doing their work. Many children are quite quick at switching from a YouTube tab to their schoolwork. Some children need more help than others, but in the meantime you can have a rule about how many tabs they are allowed to have open.

6. Monitor closely times they are in a synchronous attendance with the school they attend. In other words, do they have Google Hangout? Do they have times of the day where they are supposed to check in and are they following through with these? Stay in touch with teachers, intervention specialists, etc., to make sure that your child is doing what they are supposed to do.

7. Don’t be afraid to try some of the monitoring software that is available depending on your cell phone company. You can often get controls on your cellphone to see what your child is doing on their phone or their laptop. Ask your cellphone provider for the most updated apps possible.

8. Know what is happening today in technology. For example, YouTube is out, TikTok is in. What is the difference?

Lengthy videos versus one minute remixes.

9. Explain why video games and social media can be so enticing. In other words,

help them understand the situation. Video games reinforce your dopamine system every 3 to 5 seconds because you are getting rewarded in the games. They also create rage episodes when you lose. Social media pushes into the realm of social acceptance and likes, which many people build their self-esteem on.

10. How much video game time is too much video game time? I get asked this question often, but it really depends on the individual. There is no one true answer to this question. I think that some children or adolescents become quickly drawn in where others don’t; it is important to have a balance in life and the danger right now is that children or adolescents who were playing sports, involved in clubs, involved in their church, temple, etc., are restricted from those activities now. Find a balance of other things they can do, such as online service activities, online religious events, etc.

Our goal is to help children and adolescents embrace technology, but keep a balance. As you move through this lockdown, it’s important to talk about the fact that the rules that you are doing now will not be the rules once the lockdown is lifted.

If your child is having difficulties with social media, the sooner you get help the easier it is for successful interventions.

It does not hurt to consult with a professional.

Jay Berk, Ph.D., is the owner of Jay Berk, Ph.D. and Associates with offices in Beachwood and Westlake. He is an expert in the areas of child and adolescent behavioral health and he has taught on the subject in every state in the U.S., most provinces in Canada, Australia, New Zealand, and more. He is the author of two books, “Parent’s Quick Guide to Electronic Addiction” and “Code-Switching: Social Skills in The Screen Age,” both available on Amazon. Berk is available for telehealth consultation during the virus time and inperson consultation. Go to jayberkphd.com for more information

May 2020 - NortheastOhioParent.com

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Education CORNER

View From HOMESCHOOL

PARENTS DISH ABOUT THEIR EXPERIENCES IN THE NEW DISTANCE LEARNING ENVIRONMENT

A

By Michèle L. Bailey s the coronavirus spreads, parents across Northeast Ohio continue to make adjustments as they take on the role of teaching their kids at home. Five moms share the ups and downs of quickly transitioning their kids from school to online learning at home.

DiAndra Liccardo,

Cassandra Jessie,

Amanda McBurney,

Paula Kinney,

“When everything switched to online it was challenging. My husband and I are not computer savvy. Google Classroom can be confusing. We had to play with the Chromebook to figure out how to access quizzes and assignments. Nylah, my third-grader, was scheduled to do a video chat using Google Meet with her teacher and classmates, but figuring out how to sign on was really frustrating. She felt really frustrated because she was supposed to see her teacher and all of her friends for the first time in a couple of weeks, but it didn’t work out. We faced the challenge of learning the technology, staying on top of school deadlines and my work responsibilities while at home. We also have a 5- and a 1-year-old. To make it work, we had to create a routine. Now we get up, have breakfast and get started with our work. My daughter is adjusting to doing the work at home. She is keeping up, paying attention to due dates and making sure the work gets done.”

“When we first moved to online learning I didn’t go into panic mode. I was more worried about my kids staying safe. When they first transitioned to learning at home, I also had some concerns, such as if they were going to be stuck in their current grade. Initially everything started out with school packets for the kids to complete. Then, later, the district gave the kids their Chromebooks to access all of the online work. At times, the students are scheduled to meet their teacher and classmates in a video session.

For example, my kindergartner met with her class online to go over sight words and my son met with his music class to practice learning notes. I am computer savvy, but I never had to use the websites my children needed to access. My son, De’Lonte’, who is 9, uses them frequently. He is my assistant. He helps my five-yearold daughter, Arielle, get logged in to her classroom. That has been my bonus — my son being used to the technology. He says, ‘I got it mom,’ and then takes care of whatever is needed.”

“It was hard at first. My daughter Lilly, who is 6, didn’t quite understand why she wasn’t in school anymore. She didn’t understand why I was teaching her instead of her teacher. She struggles with giving the same attention to her studies at home that she gives at school; plus her 1-year-old sister always wants to play. Lilly likes the computer because it talks. If she doesn’t understand a word, the computer will just read it to her. She even gets to see her teacher and friends on video chats once a week. But it is still a challenge to get her to sit down in front of the computer for the time it takes to get the work done, so we take breaks and walk around the house. Overall, Lilly made the transition to online learning easy.

When we moved from learning packets to the Chromebook, Lilly knew how to sign on. She knew the codes, her email address and password. When I was trying to figure it out, she said to me, ‘just let me show you.’“

“My 14-year-old son, Carson, completes his work online using Google Classroom but mostly Zoom calls. He has to be online at certain times. I haven’t had any concerns about managing this process. My son is doing really well with managing his own work, although I double check to ensure he’s not getting behind. His school offers a lot of support and is really reaching out to parents so that we don’t feel so disconnected. But, even still, attending school at home and online is a lot for the students and it is new for them. It is a total new process for everybody so I need to do my part to make sure my son is staying on top of his work; fortunately, he doesn’t seem to be stressed.”

Twinsburg

Warrensville Heights

12 | Family Living at Its Best

Barberton

Solon

Tayler Thompson, Barberton

“Our 13-year-old son, Andrew, is online but he prefers to print the worksheets to create a packet. For him, some of the work was hard to navigate on the computer; for example, he had to complete word searches he thought easier to complete on paper. Whether his work is at school or at home online, he knows he has to get it done, and he just gets up and does it. My 8-year-old daughter, Madelyn, also prints her assignments from the computer. We do this so that she can write out her responses, this way she can work on her handwriting. Madelyn is dyslexic and works on an IEP (Individual Education Plan). The amount of work she gets is very heavy because the school wants to make sure she continues to learn at home. It is a lot and she needs a lot of assistance at her age.

The challenge is that we have five kids in total, three younger than Madelyn and one of those three is a newborn.

My husband and I both work. Under the circumstances, we are doing pretty good. Organizing ourselves and coming up with a schedule that really worked for us was key, but it still feels like it’s a little shaky as we are still getting in the groove of things.”

PARENTAL TIPS for Online Learning

W

By Michèle L. Bailey

ith COVID-19 causing statewide school closures, educators are turning to online learning to remotely deliver instruction to students. Not only is this move a big adjustment for students, but also for parents.

Jeanette Brossmann, communication studies department chair and professor at Lakeland Community College, acknowledges that initially it can be difficult for parents to manage their children’s learning in a virtual classroom platform.

“Some students are better equipped to be online learners, they tend to be much more independent learners and able to self-regulate,” Brossmann says. “Some students are not very good at it. And, for parents, it can be difficult if you are working and trying to monitor your child, or if you have more than one child and they’re all working with different online platforms.

Brossmann, who teaches online classes and homeschooled four children along with her husband, Brent offers some advice.

If you are feeling overwhelmed and anxious, take a normal breath TAKE A DEEP BREATH.

and then a deep one. Navigating your child or children’s online learning is a lot to take on and, for some, can be a daunting task. Give yourself a break and realize that you can only do the best you can.

HAVE YOUR CHILDREN CHAMPION THEIR OWN LEARNING. This

is a super frustrating time, but through it all, remember that your child is amazing and incredibly important to you. Through the online learning process, find ways to connect with your child and exercise patience. Help your children thrive through this experience while being the champions of their own learning. Encourage them to be creative and adapt to their current situation. Let them know that they are not alone and that we all have been thrown into this new normal.

CONNECT THE LEARNING TO REAL WORLD EXPERIENCES. Right

now, more than ever, parents are familiar with what kids are learning in the classroom. This provides parents a real opportunity to find ways to connect the lessons to experiences outside of the classroom. Be creative in making the learning fun and meaningful for the student.

May 2020 - NortheastOhioParent.com

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Show APPRECIATION for Teachers During Covid-19

By Michèle L. Bailey

P Need something virtually for kids to do?

Sign up for our KidStream newsletter at NortheastOhioParent.com

ivoting from classroom learning to e-learning during a pandemic added another layer of stress for educators across the state, as many teachers scrambled to quickly learn technologies such as Google Classroom and WebEx. In addition, they are assisting students who may not have internet access, meals or supplies at home.

Educators are among the heroes that are leading us through these unprecedented and challenging times. These heroes elevate us mentally and emotionally, but they too need encouragement and support. Here are three ways your family can encourage, support and make teachers smile — including some hands-on fun that kids can even do themselves, depending on their age.

CREATE A PHOTO SLIDESHOW WITH MUSIC

Take photographs to mark “a day in your life while sheltered-in.” Create a slideshow capturing grinning faces and the closeness between you and your family will bring joy to any teacher’s day. Use a variety of simple apps and online tools to create your show and even add music.

Afterwards, email the slideshow to your teacher and be assured that he or she will smile.

MAKE A VIDEO

Your family can get inspired by the latest TikTok dance challenge. Sing a song, play an instrument, share your words of wisdom or just espouse pure joy while capturing it on video.

Have your children share the video with their teachers. It’ll be a welcome break in a day of grading assignments and developing online lessons.

JOT DOWN A NOTE

14 | Family Living at Its Best

Have your child send their teacher a quick note to check in, spread cheer or communicate the things they miss most about being in class.

During COVID-19, educators’ email inboxes are filled with questions, requests and concerns.

It will be nice to receive a note simply expressing appreciation.

May 2020 - NortheastOhioParent.com

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2 0 2 0

G R A D

Soothing Seniors’ Sorrows Making up for teens’ loss of graduation rites of passage

By Jennifer Picciano

With traditional celebrations impossible, families are pivoting to other ways to recognize and celebrate soon-to-be graduates.

For Julianna Nicolli, it’s quite simple.

“I’m missing out,” she says.

A senior at Mayfield High School, she’s one of countless teenagers losing out on experiencing the traditions, rites of passage and ceremonies marking the end of their high school years.

Proms, commencements and graduation parties have all been put on hold, rescheduled (maybe) or canceled

16 | Family Living at Its Best

altogether due to the COVID-19 pandemic.

“She just keeps saying ‘I’m so disappointed,’” says her mom, Marianne Nicolli.

Julianna says she isn’t angry, just upset.

“Because it’s out of my control, and it’s not like I can be angry about something I can’t fix,” she says.

Even though the situation isn’t fixable, that doesn’t mean parents won’t try. Marianne says she’s tried to find ways of easing the negative impact for her daughter.

“We’re trying to keep it normal and doing all the things we were planning anyway,” Marianne says. “I had one of those quilts made with her old t-shirts. I wasn’t going to give it to her until graduation, but I gave it to her early to make her feel better.”

There are ways for parents to help make it up to grads and make seniors feel special — even if it isn’t in the traditional ways, says Natalie Borrell, a high school psychologist and founder of Life Success for Teen.

Start by acknowledging their emotions and validating them, Borrell - CONTINUED ON PAGE 18 -

May 2020 - NortheastOhioParent.com

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PHOTOS FROM LEFT TO RIGHT: JULIANNA NICOLLI’S SENIOR PICTURE, HER PROM DRESS HANGING ON A DOOR AND A SPECIAL QUILT HER MOM MARIANNE HAD MADE. - CONTINUED FROM PAGE 16 -

says, since their feelings of loss are justified.

“They’re missing out on all of the ‘lasts,’” she says.

Unfortunately, some parents or other adults may have a tendency to treat the teen’s loss of a graduation ceremony or prom flippantly.

“When they express those things to other people, adults, sometimes, those adults are minimizing it. ‘Ok, it’s prom, I understand you’re upset, but people are dying,’” she says.

While it’s not life and death, Borrell says, these losses are important in their life.

“Don’t dismiss or discount what they’re saying. Understand this is a big loss for them,” Borrell says.

Instead, she suggests parents help them look for and identify silver linings and appreciate the little things.

Marianne Nicolli, for example, is using this as a teachable moment.

“This is teaching them about life and being flexible,” she says. “You can work as hard as you can, but it doesn’t always work out.”

As she nears the end of high school, Julianna says she’s learned something about herself through this period of distance learning and separation.

“I’m less of a procrastinator than I thought I was,” she says. “I really can sit down and put my mind to something if I want to. I can do it.

I think it’s good that I figured that out because I’m going to college in

18 | Family Living at Its Best

the fall, so I need to manage my time better, and I think that’s going to help me with that.”

With traditional celebrations impossible, families are pivoting to other ways to recognize and celebrate soon-to-be graduates.

Here are a couple of ideas to show your seniors that they’re special.

ORGANIZE A DRIVE-BY GRADUATION PARTY.

Let people know the day and time for family and friends to drive by, honk their horn or hold a sign.

“It’s making up for the spirit of the event, keeping social distance, but still acknowledging the importance of the day,” Borrell says.

“They still deserve that acknowledgment,” Marianne Nicolli says.

HANG THEIR CAP AND GOWN ON THE FRONT DOOR OR FASHION THEM INTO A FLAG.

You know those small yard signs the schools usually post that say “A Grad at _____ High School lives here”? Amp them up and fill your yard with a larger than life version of the same gesture.

ARRANGE FOR A VIRTUAL PROM USING ZOOM.

Keep it to a manageable number; for example, with the group your teen was planning to go with. Those expensive prom dresses don’t have to hang on the door, put them to use. Seniors, their friends and dates can get dressed up and submit song requests to a designated DJ.

MAKE UP FOR CANCELED SENIOR PROJECTS OR SHADOWING EXPERIENCES THAT USUALLY TAKE PLACE IN THE SPRING.

Leverage your own network and help them arrange e-interviews or video chats with people in fields that they are interested in.

MOTIVATING THEM TO THINK OF OTHERS WILL ALSO HELP THEM COPE.

“Put them in a position where they are the ones giving help to somebody else,” Borrell says. “Some type of volunteer experience or doing a good deed every day. It really shifts your perspective from being a victim in all of this.”

Even Lieutenant Governor John Husted suggested something similar, inviting idle teens and college students to get jobs in fields in desperate need of a workforce that isn’t vulnerable. Grocery stores and delivery services could use some capable workers to help those in need.

#2020 #SENIORS2020 #STAYINGPOSITIV E #CL ASSOF2020 #QUARANTINED #COVIDSENIORS #QUARANTINESENIOR S

May 2020 - NortheastOhioParent.com

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YOU DID IT - CLASS OF 2020

đ&#x;—ž

Mikael C.

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Class of 2020

Maple Heights H.S. Class of 2020

“Behind you All your Memories, Before you All your Dreams, Around you All who LOVE you.

Within you ALL you Need.

We are so proud of you.�

Love U. Carter & A. Stacey

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Holy Name H.S. Class of 2020

“We are so proud of you! You will do great things and we will always love you like no one else.�

Love, your Mom & Dad

Logan J Frank

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Medina H.S. Class of 2020

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“The tassel’s worth the hassle.�

Bet.

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Lake Center Christian School Class of 2020

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De’Ontae DM Murray

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Lake Center Christian School Class of 2020

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“You’ve made us so very proud!

Your future is unlimited!�

God Bless! Decy and Mommy!

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Mackenzie Vacha

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Buckeye H.S. Class of 2020

“Congratulations, Kenzie!

We are so proud of you.�

Love, Mom & Dad

Abigail Jacqueline Yingling

Anna Soltes

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Saint Joseph Academy Class of 2020

Godspeed in the USAF! We are so PROUD of & LOVE you!

Gma & Gpa Misja-Romans 8:28

“We are so proud of you!

May all your dreams come true!�

Love, The Geiss Family

Ashley Adams

Louis Geer

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“We are all so proud of you!

Love all of us!

Class of 2020 rocks!�

Kyle V. Lang

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“We are so proud of you and the person you have become.

We love you so much!�

Mom, Dad, Rachel & Grandma Etti

Marion L. Steele H.S. Class of 2020

Class of 2020

Isaac Kantarovich

Beachwood H.S. Class of 2020

Iseabail “Fish� Kazawa

đ&#x;—ž

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đ&#x;—ž

“Congratulations.

We’re proud of you!�

Love, your family

Aaron “Goose� Kozickie

Jessica Veres

Padua Franciscan H.S.

NIHF STEM H.S.

“Congratulations!

We are so proud of you on achieving Magna Cum Laude!�

Love, Mom, Dad, Aden and Kyra

đ&#x;—ž

Lake Center Christian School

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đ&#x;Ž“

Class of 2020

Taylor Brittain

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Firestone H.S. Class of 2020

Class of 2020

đ&#x;Ž“

“Oh, the places you will go.� “We are proud of you! �

Love, Mom, Dad, Tate and Ella

“Congrats! You Got This!

It’s still your year.�

Love you, Mom, Dad and Donnie

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Revere H.S.

“Congrats Taylor!

We are so proud of you!�

Love Mom, Dad, and Jacob

Nathalia MuĂąiz

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Saint Joseph Academy Class of 2020

“Congrats!

So proud of my big sister.�

Love, Nalanie MuĂąiz

C o n g ra t u l a t i o n s c l a s s of 2 0 2 0 !

It was a pleasure capturing you.

Cheers to your future! – Amanda Lott Photography & Design www.lottsofdesigns.com

ALEJANDRO STAFFORD

Berea High School

GILMARIE SANTIAGO Bard High School Early College

20 | Family Living at Its Best

ASHLEY BRING Brunswick High School

TAREL BRADLEY Bard High School Early College

Congratulates the Class of

2020

Visit NortheastOhioParent.com for the latest education news, virtual learning opportunities and more!

May 2020 - NortheastOhioParent.com

| 21

YOU DID IT - CLASS OF 2020 Paul Fisher Jr.

đ&#x;—ž

Class of 2020

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Nordonia/Re-Education Class of 2020

Mayfield High School

“Congratulations Paul!

We are so proud of you!�

Love Mom and Dad

“Congrats Niyah!

We love you!�

Liliana, Carina & Tara

Marcel Ferrer

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St. Vincent De Paul Akron

“Marcel, Congratulations on your 8th grade graduation! We are very proud of you! We pray and hope for the best for you moving forward.�

We love you! Mom, Dad, Dominique & Tristan

Niyah DeJohn

Jerry Saegert

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Lorain Admiral King Elementary Class of 2020

đ&#x;—ž

“We are so proud of you every day! You are going to go far!

We love you!�

22 | Family Living at Its Best

đ&#x;—ž

Class of 2020

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Bryanna Dillon

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Elyria High School

đ&#x;—ž

Class of 2020

“Congratulations, Bryanna!

Love you to the moon and back!�

Love Nana and Papa

Sheldon L. Humphrey

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Garfield Heights H.S. Class of 2020 “Sheldon - Congratulations!

Keep striving for Greatness!�

Love Parents & Family

Connor Patrick Christie

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St. Vincent de Paul Elementary Akron Class of 2020

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“Congratulations on your 8th grade graduation!�

Love Mom, Dad, Drew, Maura & Will

Jackson Blevins

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Early Learning Center of Lorain County Class of 2020

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“We’re so proud of you, Jackson!

Good luck!�

Love Dan, Mom, Eryn, Rylie & Kaylie

Cimone LeaAnn Scruggs

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Warner Girls Leadership Academy Class of 2020

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“Cimone we’re so proud of YOU! You did it! Congrats 7th grader!�

Love Mom & Dad!

May 2020 - NortheastOhioParent.com

| 23

- SPONSORED CONTENT -

Tips to Help Grieving Students Through the Pandemic

By Lindsey Neag, School Liaison, MSSA, LSW, LSSW

As we all try to find our way to a “new normal” during the COVID-19 pandemic, navigating the crisis may be especially challenging for children and teens, who are coping with multiple losses in their lives.

There are many ways parents and guardians can help.

One major loss is a sense of normalcy.

As students, our children are accustomed to

24 | Family Living at Its Best

following a set school schedule, including going to class in the same room, seeing the same teachers and friends and going to bed at the same time. While they are learning from home, follow a regular routine. Establish morning and bedtime hours, time for homework, breaks and exercise to foster a sense of control, predictability and wellbeing.

Children and teens are also experiencing the loss of their social lives and ability to see friends and other family members.

Engage in meaningful activities to help ease feelings of isolation. Take a walk in the park, bake together or make crafts. Use technology to stay connected with others.

Children have also lost their sense of safety. They may have questions like: Will I get COVID-19? Will my family get it?

Will life ever be normal again?

Listen to their concerns, correct misinformation and use age-appropriate language to ease fears. Provide reassurance.

Explain that the risk of serious illness is low for children when infected, for example. Explain and demonstrate ways to decrease risk, such as washing hands and maintaining physical distancing. Avoid fear-based approaches such as, “If you don’t wash your hands, you will get sick.” Answer questions accurately but without unnecessary detail.

A variety of programs and resources are available to both parents and educators to help students during the COVID-19 pandemic. For more information, contact Lindsey Neag, School Liaison, at 216-210-1523, or lneag@hospicewr.org.

May 2020 - NortheastOhioParent.com

| 25

C cc Last Call for

CAMPS & SUMMER PROGRAMS

✱

AKRON ARTWORKS Visit akronartworks.com

AKRON CHILDREN’S MUSEUM Visit akronkids.org/calendar/programs

AKRON ROTARY CAMP Visit gotcamp.org

AR WORKSHOP Visit arworkshop.com

With this COVID-19 outbreak, decisions are being made rapidly. After this print publication of these camps and summer programs, some may have canceled or postponed their plans. Please visit camp and program websites for updates on summer schedules.

BALDWIN WALLACE COMMUNITY ARTS SCHOOL Visit bw.edu/sap

BECK CENTER FOR THE ARTS

Beck Center offers online camps for ages 5-19 in dance, music, theater and visual arts. Students learn new skills and build self-esteem as they create unique works of art, discover hidden talents, stimulate their imagination and have fun. Beck Center offers arts education classes and private music lessons for people of all ages and abilities. Call 216-521-2540 or visit beckcenter.org

BUSY BEES POTTERY & ARTS STUDIO

26 | Family Living at Its Best

Busy Bees Pottery & Arts Studio, located in Mentor, offers weekly themed summer art camps for kids ages 5-12. Full- or half-day camps will keep them busy learning various art methods while creating multiple projects each day. Call 440-571-5201 or visit mentor.busybeesart.com

CAMP CURIOSITY SCIENCE DAY CAMPS

Great Lakes Science Center is ready to welcome everyone back to Camp Curiosity this summer! This year we are offering both @Home and @GLSC camp experiences to best fit your family’s needs. Both options have been designed with your child’s health and safety in mind. Visit greatscience.com

CAMP FITCH YMCA Visit campfitchymca.org

CAMP INVENTION AND CAMP INVENTION CONNECT

Adapt. Invent. Thrive. Just like you, everyone at Camp Invention is doing their best to adapt to challenging times with ingenuity and optimism. This year, summer learning is more important than ever before.

To meet the needs of parents and children across the country, they’re offering both their traditional, in-person Camp Invention program and a brand new at-home

c

experience, Camp Invention Connect. Both program options provide opportunities for hands-on exploration and collaboration while building confidence, creativity and persistence. Visit invent.org/save

CAMP LEAD

Camp LEAD: “The Amazing Chase” is a week-long day camp with high-energy activities promoting leadership and social emotional learning. Inspired by the television show “The Amazing Race,” campers learn about healthy competition, collaboration and accomplishing goals. Campers will stretch personal limits to become effective leaders.

Call 216-292-8775 or visit effectivela.org

CAVS ACADEMY SUMMER CAMPS Visit cavsyouth.com

CHALLENGE ISLAND VIRTUAL AND IN-PERSON STEAM CAMPS AND WORKSHOPS

Challenge Island is a high-energy fusion of 21st century skills, problem solving, and adventure built around pop culture themes kids love. Kids embark on fantastical themed STEAM journeys where they tackle exciting challenges using only the materials in their treasure chests and their boundless imaginations. Visit challenge-island.com/summit-medina or challenge-island.com/clevelandeast

CLEVELAND CITY DANCE Visit clevelandcitydance.com

COMMON GROUND

Visit commongroundcenter.org

CPH SUMMER ACADEMY

Join Cleveland Play House for CPH Summer Academy.

Students ages 4-18 can participate in half-day, week-long or two-week intensives in June and July. Classes are open to students of all abilities and experience levels. Scholarships and aftercare are available. Call 216-414-7111 or visit clevelandplayhouse.com/academy

CREATIVE PLAYROOMS Visit creativeplayrooms.com

CUYAHOGA COMMUNITY COLLEGE (TRI-C) Visit tri-c.edu/summercamps

DISCOVER CAMP 2020 Visit medinarec.org

ETIQUETTE KINDNESS SPECIALITY CAMPS

Visit chagrinvalleyfarms.com

This summer at Gilmour Academy, Beachwood Recreation, Orange Continuing Ed and Westlake Recreation, kids will have confidence, fun character-building and hands-on learning during these camps. Learn the tricks of first impressions, become a dining expert and discover the art of a well-written thank you note. Call 216-292-8888

CLASSROOM ANTICS STEAM CAMPS

FAIRMOUNT CENTER FOR THE ARTS

CHAGRIN VALLEY FARMS

Visit classroomantics.com/clevelandsummer-camps

Fairmount’s All Access Summer of Arts provides FREE online classes in all

the arts for all ages! Additionally, Fairmount’s Camp Kits provide camp fun via art kits and interactive online sessions. Finally, Fairmount’s ArtsyoU programs offers online private music instruction and other one-on-one customized arts experiences.

Register at 440-338-3171 or fairmountcenter.org

FALCON CAMP

Recognized throughout the Midwest as Ohio’s premier private camp. Independently selected “Top Ten Camp in USA” and Ohio’s “Coolest Camp.” Beautiful lakefront setting, talented staff, wide variety of activities and great food. Outstanding opportunity for fun and growth in a safe, healthy environment. ACA accredited. Boys and girls, ages 6-16. Call 800-837-CAMP or visit falconcamp.com

THE FINE ARTS ASSOCIATION In response to the global pandemic, FAA will continue to offer arts education whether it is taking place under their roof or yours. They can ensure you and/or your child will have ample opportunity to be creative, to socialize and to learn. Keep your creative juices flowing by embracing the arts. Visit finearts association.org/education/summer-at-faa

GEAUGA PARK DISTRICT

Geauga Park District’s 8th annual adventure camps come in week-long forms for youth entering grades 5-7.

Camps run the weeks of June 8, July 6, July 13, July 27 and Aug. 3, plus Junior Naturalist Camp the week of June 15.

Week-long experiences for teens entering grades 8-10 are the weeks of June 15 and July 20. Single-day “X-Treme Adventures” for the older kids are also July 9, 16 and 23. Visit bit.ly/gpdcamps

May 2020 - NortheastOhioParent.com

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C

CAMPS & SUMMER PROGRAMS

GILMOUR DAY CAMPS Visit gilmour.org/summercamp

GOLDFISH SWIM SCHOOL Visit goldfishswimschool.com

GRAND RIVER ACADEMY Visit grandriver.org

HATHAWAY BROWN SCHOOL Visit hb.edu/summer

HAWKEN SUMMER PROGRAMS

Hawken Summer Programs offer a variety of activities led by experienced professionals for boys and girls ages 4-18. Camp offerings include day camps, one-week Passport Camps, Innovation Camps, Athletics Camps and Summer Studies. Camps run between June and August. Call 440-423-2940, email summerprograms@hawken.edu or visit summer.hawken.edu

HOLDEN FORESTS & GARDENS SUMMER CAMPS Visit holdenarb.org

ID TECH CAMP Visit idtech.com

28 | Family Living at Its Best

May 2020 - NortheastOhioParent.com

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C

CAMPS & SUMMER PROGRAMS LAKE ERIE NATURE & SCIENCE CENTER Visit lensc.org

LAKE METROPARKS SUMMER DAY CAMPS Visit lakemetroparks.com

LAKE RIDGE ACADEMY

Visit lakeridgeacademy.org/summer

LAKESHORE DANCE & GYMNASTICS SUMMER CAMPS Visit lakeshoregym.com

LIBERTY CAMP FOR KIDS Visit libertycampforkids.com

SUMMER AT LAUREL

Visit laurelschool.org/summer

LE CHAPERON ROUGE Visit Lechaperonrouge.com

LEARNING ABOUT BUSINESS (LAB)

Visit learningaboutbusiness.org

LORAIN COUNTY METROPARKS

Visit loraincountymetroparks.com

MAD SCIENCE AND CRAYOLA IMAGE ARTS ACADEMY

Visit northeastohio.madscience.org or imagineartsacademy.com

30 | Family Living at Its Best

MAGICAL THEATRE COMPANY Visit magicaltheatre.org

Visit summerwindstables.com or summerwindtack.com

MAGNIFICAT

UNIVERSITY SCHOOL

Visit magnificaths.org

MATHNASIUM

Visit mathnasium.com

MCC TECH KEY KIDS KAMP Visit mosscard.com/ techkeyregistration

WESTERN RESERVE ACADEMY

SUMMER WIND STABLES

Summer 2020 programs include many new enrichment camps and academic courses, along with our popular sports clinics and day camps. Held at Shaker Heights and Hunting Valley campuses, US camps are led by experienced teachers and coaches. They offer camps for preschool-age kids through high school. Visit us.edu/summer

Another exciting season of summer camps at Western Reserve Academy. Whether your child wants to develop their athletic, academic or creative skills — or just have fun and make friends — you’ll find options that perfectly fit their needs and your schedule.

Call 330-650-5832 or visit wra.net

YMCA OF CENTRAL STARK COUNTY Visit ymcastark.org

NATURE CENTER AT SHAKER LAKES

Visit shakerlakes.org/camp

OLD TRAIL SCHOOL

Old Trail School’s Summer Camp offers sun, fun, friends and nonstop activities in Cuyahoga Valley National Park. We offer 100-plus options, including half and full-day camps, for children ages 3-14 and transportation from Hudson and Brecksville. Full camp information can be found at oldtrail.org/summer.

PERSPECTIVES ACADEMY Visit jayberkphd.com/summer

PROGRESS WITH CHESS Visit progresswithchess.org

RED OAK CAMP Visit redoakcamp.org

SAINT JOSEPH ACADEMY Visit sja1890.org

SUMMER RUFFING IT! 2020 Visit ruffingmontessori.net

May 2020 - NortheastOhioParent.com

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winds

32 | Family Living at Its Best

of

In uncharted territory amidst a pandemic, our children can struggle. We look at how to help them cope with this new normal and improve mental health. BY LINDSEY GEISS

change

“Llama! Llama!” shouts a five-year-old on a walk through the park with her dad.

An average adult llama is 5 to 6 feet long — her family’s light-hearted way to measure physical distance in public.

Later at home, she does yoga while her older sister dances. It’s important to frame serious conversations, including those related to coronavirus, in developmentally appropriate terms without being too dramatic or ambiguous. And, building physical activity into daily schedules helps relieve stress while providing structure. No one understands this quite like their father, John Ackerman, PhD, a clinical child and adolescent psychologist and suicide prevention coordinator at the Nationwide Children’s Hospital Center of Suicide Prevention and Research (CSPR) in Columbus.

“Across the country, rates of anxiety and distress — dealing with isolation, uncertainty and lack of connection — seem to be increasing,” Ackerman says. “We are not necessarily seeing an increase in outreach to suicide crisis lines and ER visits for behavioral issues, but that might be misleading. A lot of people are focusing on pressing health and physical needs and probably not attending to the stress and trauma aspects that may unfold over time.” Anxiety, depression and suicide are a growing concern for youth. Special consideration must be given to help children at this time of heightened stress, especially those who are already at increased risk.

“How kids are responding depends on a lot of factors, including whether they are stressed or not already,” says Dr. Brittany Myers, licensed pediatric psychologist at MetroHealth Medical Center and assistant professor of psychiatry at Case Western Reserve University School of Medicine. “It varies by age, understanding of situations, and the support and resources they have. For instance, a lot of kids and adolescents find social distancing difficult, missing friends and grandparents. Some feel overwhelmed, bullied or ostracized at school, so being home with family is a relief. Others have more stress at home with family conflict and look to get out of the house.

Limiting physical access to school and friends now puts them at higher risk [for anxiety and depression], given those triggers.”

A CLOSER LOOK AT ANXIETY, DEPRESSION & SUICIDE Anxiety disorders are common, affecting one in eight children.

While anxiety is a normal part of childhood, anxiety disorders are characterized by “persistent, irrational and overwhelming worry, fear and anxiety that interfere with daily activities,” according to the Anxiety Disorders Association of America. Symptoms vary and may include irritability, sleeplessness, jitteriness or physical symptoms like headaches and stomachaches. Anxiety disorders in children include generalized anxiety disorder, obsessive-compulsive disorder, panic disorder, post-traumatic stress disorder,

May 2020 - NortheastOhioParent.com

| 33

“

Research is rapidly evolving on the topic of anxiety and depression in youth during a pandemic.

Therapists, medical providers and crisis line workers are telling us that stress and agitation have increased in youth.

social anxiety disorder and specific phobias. Each one has specific symptoms. If left untreated, anxiety can lead to depression, substance use and increased risk for self-harm and suicide. Depression for kids does not always look like it does in adults, Myers says.

“For adults, we are used to looking for signs of sadness and low energy. For children, it can be rapid mood swings, angry outbursts, withdrawal and appetite or hygiene changes,” she says. “Statements about death and dying should be taken seriously during all times.”

Other warning signs that an individual may be experiencing depression or thoughts of suicide — and are in need of intervention — include giving away possessions, risky or reckless behavior, energy changes and decreased interest in usual activities.

“Research is rapidly evolving on the topic of anxiety and depression in youth during a pandemic,” Ackerman says. “Therapists, medical providers and crisis line workers are telling us that stress and agitation have increased in youth, and this may be because we’ve added a few other big mental health risk factors including lack of social connection, worries about health, death and dying, sleep disruption and physical inactivity. As [economic stress and] loss in families and the community occurs, there is potential for trauma on top of unaddressed trauma.”

Suicide is the leading cause of death for Ohioans ages 10 to 14 and second leading cause of death among Ohioans ages 15-34, according to a November 2019 report from the Ohio Department of Health. One youth dies by suicide every 33 hours. In Cuyahoga County, about one in four high school students reported depressive symptoms in the last 12 months, as measured in the CDC’s 2017 Youth Risk Behavior Survey, and Cleveland high schoolers have one of the highest suicidality rates in the country.

WHO IS AT HIGHEST RISK? Ackerman warns that suicide risk may increase the most for those already at risk, including children and adolescents with mental health disorders like mood and anxiety disorders, a history of abuse or mistreatment, substance abuse, impulsivity, easy access to means (e.g., firearms) and identification as LGBTQ. While no one is immune, it is not a level playing field.

Meyers notes this is particularly concerning in places where research shows children are exposed to higher rates of adverse childhood experiences (ACEs), ranging from physical, emotional or sexual abuse; physical or emotional neglect; domestic violence; parental mental health, substance abuse, incarceration, and separation or divorce; in addition to higher rates of poverty and exposure to community violence. ACEs are linked to chronic levels of stress impacting rates of anxiety, depression and suicidality.

“Now being cooped up, there is increased risk of domestic violence, child abuse and substance abuse,” Myers says. “Ohio has seen a concerning reduction in reports of child abuse, which could lead to increased rates and we will not know it given reports usually come from school, friends and neighbors outside the home.

Ackerman adds, “not all families navigate conflict well.

Even though calls are not up, instances of abuse neglect and domestic violence may increase over time. With an increase in firearm sales also comes potential for greater violence.”

“

34 | Family Living at Its Best

MENTAL HEALTH PROVIDERS ADAPT TO MEET NEEDS Ackerman says “people are worried, terrified even, to go into a health care setting” and urges families to keep regular appointments and reach out for new help as needed. Medical providers across the country have quickly adapted to meet those needs.

“I know many local and national crisis lines have expanded capabilities,” Myers says. “For MetroHealth, now almost all services are made available by telephone or video. If someone is experiencing increased anxiety and depression, he or she can have a same-day follow-up call with a MetroHealth psychologist.”

Elizabeth Wolanski, child and adolescent services director of the Mental Health, Addiction and Recovery Services (MHARS) Board, and chair of Lorain County’s Suicide Prevention Coalition, is also seeing an uptick in stress-management needs for families, but not an increase in local crisis calls from parents or for children.

She notes that clinicians are still seeing their young patients and are adapting care to fit the current precautions for COVID-19. Sometimes that means options much like the therapeutic appointments children are used to, sometimes it means shorter, more frequent telehealth check-ins.

“Many of our clinicians who typically work in the schools are providing prevention resources for families, which helps them through a stressful time and strengthens their family bonds as well,” Wolanski says.

Ackerman says Nationwide Children’s Hospital system has done one of the most massive shifts to tele-behavioral health.

“We went from having a minimal tele-behavioral health presence to doing over 20,000 visits in the first few weeks and we now have well over 50,000 visits since the order was initiated,” he says. “Although it takes a little getting used to, this treatment is acceptable to families and is effective. Over time these offerings can increase access to more rural areas and build connections not previously established.”

HELPING CHILDREN COPE To best support children, pay attention to how you are coping first. In addition to modeling appropriate behaviors and facilitating developmentally appropriate communication.

“During this uncertain and challenging time, expect meltdowns and support kids in sitting with tough feelings or overwhelming fears rather than jumping in to solve everything. Not every thought or feeling deserves our full attention or energy,” Ackerman says. “Creating space to work this out is really important.”

He suggests parents draw upon a variety of proactive and reactive strategies to help children manage stress and anxiety: Facilitate physical strategies, including exercise and relaxation techniques like deep breathing, yoga and meditation. Ensure proper diet and sleep.

Use cognitive strategies. If worries or negative self-talk occurs more than usual, consider paying attention to when they happen and what they are signaling. Is there truly evidence to support them or is the brain only sending negative information and ignoring the bright spots?

Identify and challenge potential catastrophic or irrational thoughts. Is it harming you to spend so much time in “worry-mode” and can we interrupt this, or can it be

talking TO YOUR CHILD

Research has shown addressing negative emotional states reduces the overall intensity and longevity. John Ackerman, PhD, a clinical child and adolescent psychologist and suicide prevention coordinator at the Nationwide Children’s Hospital Center of Suicide Prevention and Research (CSPR) in Columbus, offers eight tips for talking with children about their feelings: 1. Frequent, shorter check-ins are more powerful than one long conversation.

2. Use open-ended, rather than “yes/no” or leading questions. (e.g., “What worries you?”) Sit next to them, and help identify the emotions. (e.g., “I noticed you seem to be more edgy than usual. Tell me about what’s been going on.”)

3. Listen actively, let your child lead, and model calmness.

4. Have compassion, but don’t try to solve problems all at once.

5. Avoid questioning or accusing. (e.g., “You have so much. How can you feel this way?”)

6. Help the child feel in control. (e.g., “Yes, this is upsetting and difficult for all of us. We are pulling together, and things will not always be this way.

What things can we do every day despite being isolated?)

7. Let the child talk through what they are most concerned about, whether that is the health of grandparents, never going back to school or missing a best friend’s birthday party.

8. For high school seniors, especially, acknowledge these students have been robbed of rites of passage and perhaps jobs or educational opportunities and celebrations with family and friends. Online activities cannot replace certain milestones, so expect heightened anxiety and allow them to grieve loss.

ARE YOU OR YOUR CHILD EXPERIENCING A MENTAL HEALTH CRISIS? Contact your mental health

provider, county crisis line or one of these free, confidential resources: • • •

Text “4HOPE” to 741741 to reach the Crisis Text Line in Ohio.

Call 800-273-TALK (8255) to reach the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline or use the Lifeline Chat web chat service online.

Call 800-985-5990 to reach the Disaster Distress Helpline, which provides 24/7, 365-day-a-year crisis counseling and support to people experiencing emotional distress related to natural or human-caused disasters or traumatic events like the coronavirus.

ignored and we move past it?

Practice mindfulness. Be present in the moment and focus on one thing at a time, not the bad things that did or could happen in the future.

Improve how we communicate and spend time with others to stay connected. Ask, how do I get what I want from people around me that meets my needs and theirs?

Be empathetic yet assertive.

Hone emotional regulation skills. Give children language to identify emotions and know what to do within their control to manage feelings and behaviors.

Help them break it down: When I have these thoughts, this emotion happens and here are ways to deal with it. Understand anxiety and stress will not last forever, and sometimes we must ride the wave until we are in a better position to manage our stress and fears. Younger children have difficulty self-regulating and rely on adult models to coach them. Make sure our expectations of what kids can manage are realistic and fair.

Have an updated proactive safety plan for young people with a history of self-injury or suicidal thoughts to manage a crisis. This includes trusted adults to verbalize feelings, and, for older children, numbers to call or text.

Make sure they know what to do and where to go even though physically connecting with friends and family is less of an option. Also, be aware of lethal means in the environment so they can be stored safely, particularly if a young person is in distress or showing warning signs of suicide.

“In early childhood, kids take cues from adults in their life,” Myers says. “Think about how a parent reacts when a child falls and scrapes a knee can impact whether the child cries or sniffles and goes right back to playing. In therapy, we work on emotion identification, vocabulary to share feelings, and calm down skills, including walking away and taking deep breaths when angry. Just as parents teach children how to share and wait in line, they should teach them about emotions and coping.”

In a pandemic, there is a general sense of discomfort that can mirror many symptoms of a disorder.

“Identify when things are outside a level a child can typically manage to seek professional support,” Ackerman says. “Signs include not being able to take care of normal everyday responsibilities, like schoolwork or feel good about things they are doing, not getting along with others, or if a person is frustrated, tense or agitated more often than not.”

However, he advises to keep it in context.

“When we are forced to be around each other [working and schooling from home], there will be more meltdowns and challenges, so give grace for that,” he says.

SILVER LININGS It’s not all doom and gloom. In addition to growing tele-mental health options, Ackerman says the pandemic has created novel opportunities to increase social connection through technology and options to create new routines that make mental health a priority.

“I see many people being resilient in the face of adversity,” he says. “I’ve watched online and in neighborhoods people using creative ways to connect, slowing down and exploring what makes meaning for them.”

Myers highlights examples of neighbors helping neighbors and finding new and innovative ways to celebrate, from car parades to virtual parties.

“Model for kids what you value as a family and keep doing that,” she says.

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DISRUPTIVE BEHAVIOR DISORDERS

How to cope with hostile or uncooperative kids — and when to seek help

BY SHANA O’MALLEY-SMITH

D

o you feel like certain situations turn your child into a ticking time bomb?

Do you dread frequent morning arguments about going to school?

Or maybe you’ve noticed your child pushing or acting aggressively toward teammates or during an extracurricular activity? These types of uncooperative or hostile actions are a sampling of what could be a disruptive behavior disorder.

“This type of behavior might be physical aggression, verbal aggression towards others, it may also be property destruction, so throwing or breaking things. A lot of that is dependent on the child’s developmental level,” says Dr. Catrina Litzenburg, pediatric psychologist at Cleveland Clinic Children’s.

Disruptive behavior disorders (DBD) can seriously impact a child’s daily life. Children with disruptive behavior disorders show ongoing patterns of uncooperative and defiant behavior, according to Nationwide Children’s Hospital in Columbus.

WHY IS MY CHILD DOING THIS? Disruptive behaviors are often linked to problems with self-control of emotions and behaviors.

“We know that children’s brains are still developing and they don’t yet have the skills that they need to manage their own emotions and behaviors, so they tend to respond more impulsively,” Litzenburg says.

There’s a variety of reasons that could trigger disruptive behaviors. Early exposure to trauma, life circumstances or changes in lifestyle can be contributing factors. In other cases, an underlying medical issue could be to blame.

“Some kids have thyroid issues or sensory issues,” says Dr. Jay Berk, a licensed psychologist who works with oppositional defiant children. “Some kids have learning disabilities, and they’re flipping out during homework. Once you get that learning disability figured out, the behavior gets better.”

Children who suffer from attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) are at a higher risk for developing disruptive behavior disorders, according to Nationwide Children’s Hospital.

typical development thing or if it needs more intervention,” Litzenburg says. “From there, a specialist may assess how the behavior is impacting school, social relationships and home life.”

“Often we’re looking at things like frequency — how often is it happening — intensity — what’s the level of those episodes and settings,” Litzenburg says. “Is it only at home, is it home and church, is it school? Thinking about how widespread it is can also be an indicator of level of concern.”

TREATMENT OPTIONS Experts say early intervention is extremely important to managing disruptive behaviors.

“We’re partially effective in managing these in young children, like ages 2-7, and that’s partly because that’s the age when they really care about the parents,” Litzenburg says.

“After that it becomes more about peers and privileges and rewards.”

A therapist can help identify the reason behind the behavior and come up with effective behavioral techniques.

“One thing I’m able to do is identify why the child is acting out and what’s the reason behind that,” Berk says. “For example, they’re acting out because they want something and they don’t have the patience to wait for it, or they’re acting out because they’re being left out but they don’t have the social skills to fit in.”

Once identified, they can begin work on building the skills the child may be lacking.

Parent-child interaction therapy will also help parents learn effective techniques to manage behaviors at home.

MANAGING BEHAVIOR AT HOME One of the first things caregivers can do is keep a journal and record episodes of disruptive or aggressive behavior. This will help their doctor pinpoint triggers.

“Also make notes about good days and good behaviors,” Berk says Another thing parents can do is use their own behavior as a model for their children.

Berk says, for parents, say “‘I’m feeling frustrated right now, so I’m going to take a break.’ What happens is, the kid starts to hear that and assimilate it.”

It’s also important to pay attention to how you or other caregivers respond to the disruptive behavior and use it to your advantage.

“Parents recognize that their attention is gold and that’s what the child wants most,” Litzenburg says.

“Give that attention in a strategic way. The behaviors that we pay more attention to are the ones that are going to happen more often.”

For instance, if your child has difficulty sharing toys, be complimentary when you see them sharing.

“Showing approval is likely to be effective or helpful and the kid is more likely to do that in the future,” Litzenburg says.

GETTING A DIAGNOSIS

LASTLY, GIVE KIDS SOME SLACK.

Even if disruptive behavior is a small concern, it’s still worth mentioning to a child’s doctor.

“They are really good at helping to decide if it’s a

“No kid wants to get up and make your life miserable,” Berk says. “Most kids don’t like the feeling of being out of control and a lot of kids will apologize later for acting out.”

Family Living Living at at Its Its Best Best 36 | Family

talk IT OUT

Parents should prioritize their own mental health and consider therapy

BY MARISA PALMIERI SHUGRUE

Parenting is a tough job — perhaps the most difficult one many of us do — and requires physical and mental stamina during the best of times. Insert a global pandemic with a stay-at-home order, requiring you to supervise your children’s education on top of doing your day job and juggling household duties, and it’s no surprise some parents are experiencing feelings of anxiety, stress and depression. One antidote for symptoms of emotional distress or mental health disorders is psychotherapy, also known as “talk therapy.” May is Mental Health Month and there is no better time to evaluate your mental health and consider whether psychotherapy or another treatment option is right for you. Heather Renz of Fairview Park calls it “life changing.” A mom of two, stepmom of two and health care administrator, she urges other parents to give it a try if they’re feeling anxious or need help coping with a difficult situation. “It’s changed my relationships for the better and makes me feel better,” she says.

IS THERAPY RIGHT FOR YOU? Therapy involves confidentially discussing your feelings and behaviors with a psychiatrist, psychologist or licensed counselor.

“The way I explain therapy to my patients is a safe place in which to talk about whatever is on their minds,” says Dr. Adam Borland, a psychologist with the Cleveland Clinic’s Center for Behavioral Health. “My job is to provide clinical support, feedback and tools for them to better manage whatever symptoms or presenting problems are bringing them to me.”

If you’re wondering if you’re a good candidate for therapy, you probably are, Borland says.

Anyone can benefit from therapy, but parents in particular benefit because they experience complicated marital and family dynamics, have work/ life balance concerns and often don’t prioritize self-care.

“Oftentimes parents put their own needs farther down on the priority list,” he says. “I reassure my patients that practicing self-care doesn’t mean you’re being selfish. Addressing sources of stress or anxiety is ultimately going to make you a better parent.”

Renz agrees. She first went to therapy about 15 years ago as a college student struggling with homesickness, anxiety and depression. She restarted therapy about six years ago to cope with a divorce and being a single parent.

“I decided I needed to do something to be a better version of myself for my kids,” she says, noting she learned tools like walking through worsecase scenarios and redirecting her thoughts. “It’s helped me recognize my feelings better so I’m not taking them out on other people.”

HOW TO GET STARTED

YOU ARE NOT ALONE Mental illnesses are conditions that affect a person’s thinking, feeling, behaviors or mood.

They are more common than most people think, according to the National Alliance on Mental Health, because people often don’t talk about them.

CONSIDER: • 1 in 5 U.S. adults experience mental illness each year.

• Anxiety disorders are the most common mental health concern in the U.S. More than 40 million adults in the U.S. have an anxiety disorder.

Before going to therapy, determine how you’ll pay for it. Most health insurance covers outpatient behavioral therapy, Borland says, noting some people have to pay out of pocket for treatment.

“Call the number on your insurance card to get an idea of what is covered,” he says. “It’s case specific.”

Some employers offer counseling through employee assistance programs, Renz adds.

In any case, finding the right therapist is key.

Borland says many patients find therapists by word of mouth, get a referral from their primary care doctor or by calling a local health system for an appointment.

Once you find a therapist, determine whether you’re comfortable talking with the person. If not, it’s OK to find someone new. “That happens all the time,” Borland says. “Sometimes it’s not a great fit.”

Renz has changed therapists several times.

“You know whether or not you feel comfortable with someone usually within the first couple minutes of meeting them,” she says. “Don’t give up right away if it’s not the right fit. The right fit is out there, and it’s OK to move around and try different people.”

May 2020 2020 -- NortheastOhioParent.com NortheastOhioParent.com May

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7 Days Self-care: P of

BECAUSE ONE DAY IN MAY IS NOT ENOUGH FOR MOTHER’S DAY

W

By Dahlia Fisher

e’ve all seen the quarantine memes comparing adults without kids to those parents with young children trapped in the house. Images of frazzled moms with baby food stuck in their hair, small handprints decorating three-day-old lounge wear and piles of mess surrounding them provide a bit of comfort to those of us who are barely hanging on.

We’re part of the same chaos club, in which parents are doing their best to juggle multiple responsibilities simultaneously — working from home, helping with school, managing three meals a day plus snacks (don’t forget about snacks), dishes, laundry

Meditation Monday: Let’s

and the list goes on.

Truth is, we need a break.

Enter Mother’s Day. Okay, so let’s deconstruct this one day when a kid brings you breakfast in bed, hopefully with a sweet handmade card and maybe you get to pick an activity that you like to do — usually with the whole family in tow. As nice as those gestures are, it doesn’t seem like enough to effectively de-stress amid a global pandemic. And so we hereby declare every day in May to be Mother’s Day. Check out these seven ways to celebrate yourself this month (or anytime). Because, after all, you deserve it.

face it, you can’t take care of others if you don’t take care of yourself. Our number one recommendation for self-care is — drum roll — find five minutes to meditate. That’s it, five minutes. According to verywell.com, “Many people don’t try meditation because they believe it’s difficult to practice or only effective with regular, lengthy sessions. Not true... Just five minutes of meditation actually can bring quick stress relief.”

38 Family Living Living at at Its Its Best Best 38 || Family

Talk It Out Tuesday: When life gets busy, some-

times friendships fall by the wayside. Childhood friends who share memories like riding bikes with you around the neighborhood, or high school friends who you cried your eyes out with after your first heartbreak, or college friends who you crammed all night with to get through finals, or post-college friends who convinced you to take that cross-country road trip or your new mom friends who you met during Baby and Me classes. Yes, those friends. Carve out some time to talk to them. Many people are using chat room sites such as Zoom to connect with their friends during the stay-at-home order due to the COVID-19 outbreak. According to the Mayo Clinic, “Friendships may take a back seat to other priorities, such as work or caring for children or aging parents...The enjoyment and comfort friendship can provide, however, makes the investment worthwhile.”

Wear What You Want Wednesday:

It’s the middle of the week and you’re feeling blah, but something in your closet beckons you. That little black dress you never get a chance to wear anymore. Seems impractical to put it on when there’s no occasion? Well, we’re here to tell you to wear what you want. Reader’s Digest reports, “More often than not, we dress how we’d like to feel or how we’d like others to think we’re feeling. In other words, we put on a happy sweater along with a happy smile, even if we’re feeling down. And it works...” Your kids will notice if your mood changes from feeling blah to beautiful too. Even if they’re the only people who see you smile, that’s worth it.

You’re worth it.

Thoughtful Thursday: Have you heard the hype about journaling? It’s not just for teen angst anymore. According to Positive Psychology, “A gratitude journal is, quite simply, a tool to keep track of the good things in life. No matter how difficult and defeating life can sometimes feel, there is always something to feel grateful for.” Invest in a journal that brings you joy. Designs range from inspirational quotes to blooming bouquets to leather-bound lux.

Then fill the pages with thoughts on what you’re grateful for.

May 2020 - NortheastOhioParent.com

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Sleep-in Sunday: Hitting the snooze button doesn’t always

work with young children at home. But crawling under the covers after a warm bath might offer the same benefits. We checked in with relaxation experts at Nabalik who claim, “Taking a warm bath before bed is known to help people fall asleep more quickly. Your body tends to drop in temperature at night and in turn produce melatonin, a chemical associated with sleeping. Warm water makes you, well, warmer, so the temperature drop at night is even more dramatic, giving you a boost towards bed. A better night’s rest leads to a slew of health benefits, so a warm bath before bed creates a snowball effect toward a healthier you.”

Feel-good Friday: By the

time Friday rolls around, you might have pizza delivery on speed dial, but what about ordering in from a restaurant that offers your brain a boost instead? Nutritionists at Healthline.com suggest, “The foods you eat play a role in keeping your brain healthy and can improve specific mental tasks, such as memory and concentration.” And, we all know how hard that can be with the bazillion different tasks we have to complete each day. Feel good about what you put in your body whether you or someone else makes the meal.

Sunshine Saturday: It’s no

secret that walking does the body good but don’t rely on your treadmill to do the trick. Boost your immune system with a healthy dose of natural Vitamin D (aka the “sunshine vitamin”) when you soak in some rays with a walk in the neighborhood or at a local park. Thrive Global, an organization that seeks to end the stress and burnout epidemic, advises, “When you walk in the green spaces you lead your brain to a calm state with little or no signs of anxiety.” It’s your weekend too, so go ahead and walk your way to relaxation.

Dahlia Fisher is a writer, artist, motivational speaker and workshop leader. You can follow her on her blog (dahliafisher.com) to learn more about her year facing new challenges to practice living with more presence and purpose in 2020.

40 | Family Living at Its Best

May 2020 - NortheastOhioParent.com

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f e ct T r e P i m o

e ro H r w Yo u

POTENTIAL AND CURRENT FOSTER CARE FAMILIES FIND NEW WAYS TO GET INFORMATION AND SUPPORT DURING COVID-19

A

imee and Ralph Hubbert of Akron decided there was no perfect time to be foster care parents.

“We knew the clock was ticking,” Aimee Hubbert says.

It was 2017 and it was a big year for the couple. They were engaged and in the midst of preparing for their wedding in April.

Shortly after their nuptials, they began training to become foster parents, and then were licensed.

In October of that same year, they received a foster placement, it was twin boys. It wasn’t a perfect time either, but that didn’t matter.

“We just had to strap in for the rollercoaster ride,” Aimee Hubbert says.

With the COVID-19 outbreak, it has been challenging times for everyone and

42 | Family Living at Its Best

By Angela Gartner many are canceling their plans or projects.

However, the one thing that doesn’t have to be put off is becoming a foster care parent.

“We are continuing to get interest from potential foster and adoptive parents online or via our recruitment phone line, and we’re following up on every inquiry because we still need loving homes for our children,” says Jacqueline Fletcher, caregiver resource management and Bryan Stanton, foster/adoption recruitment supervisor of Cuyahoga County Division of Children and Family Services Many agencies are also providing virtual informational group meetings and training.

“We continue to offer the information meetings via Facebook both in the afternoons and evenings through the month of May,” says Ann Ream, department director of com-

munity relations and foster care for Summit County Children Services. “Virtual meetings and training opportunities will continue to be planned as a way to inform, train and support potential and/or current foster parents.”

The pandemic has necessitated adjustments, says Debora Gault, director of foster care at Ohio Guidestone.

“Everything we do now has to be thought about differently, yet still in a very deliberate way,” Gault says. “There are so many children who continue to need what we have to offer – structure, limits, love – and we still need foster parents to provide this.”

SUPPORT FOR FOSTER PARENTS

Area agencies and foster care support groups have always been a source of help in - CONTINUED ON PAGE 44 -

BE THE

REASON CHILDREN are

SAFE

The need is growing. Currently there are more than 800 children in custody in Summit County and only 170 foster homes.

Become a foster parent!

330.379.1990 | summitkids.org |

May 2020 - NortheastOhioParent.com

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- CONTINUED FROM PAGE 42 -

foster family communities — but now most everything has to be done virtually.

“My workers have stayed in touch with their foster parents, kinship parents, via phone, Skype, Facetime, visits at their homes through a door or window and have told caregivers to let us know if they need anything,” says Amy Buresch, social service supervisor at Geauga County Job and Family Services. “The caregivers can always get a hold of the worker, supervisor or use our hotline. The emancipated youth have been taken care of by our independent living worker, and she has provided them with gift cards, food, etc.”

Those who in any other time would be leaving the foster system are also receiving temporary support from the state. Last month, Ohio Governor Mike DeWine announced that the state will cover the costs to keep more than 200 youth who are aging out of foster care in the foster care system until the COVID-19 pandemic ends, according to the governor’s office press release.

“Youth that are aging out of the foster care system are the population that gets forgotten the most,” Gault says. “Providing them with continued support is so important as they, too, are navigating the uncertainty of this global health crisis.”

Many children in foster care still need their health needs met. Foster parents are finding virtual resources.

“Our foster parents are now using telemedicine through Akron Children’s Hospital that allows them to visit with a health care provider almost anytime,” Ream says.

“Telemedicine does not replace traditional health care, but it does support it particularly during the pandemic.”

With this being a stressful time across the U.S., agencies are helping parents and children who are trying to cope the best way

possible.

“As situations continue to evolve daily, we have been actively communicating with our caregivers and families by sharing various ways to cope with stress and/or behavioral changes they may be experiencing,” Fletcher and Stanton says. “The loss of human interactions and routine can be very taxing on all of us. It can be difficult for children to understand the changes happening in our world.”

“Foster parents are the reason children are safe and are so important in this community,” Ream says. “Children who are living in situations that are unsafe need to be protected. Many of these children experience traumatic life events that have long-term negative consequences for themselves and the community.”

FOSTER CARE NEEDED

As the world continues to live in lockdown, or at least the time being where uncertainty is still fresh in our minds, nothing has changed dramatically for the foster care system. There are children in Northeast Ohio who still need help in finding a home — and for some agencies, the need is increasing.

“Since 2013, Summit County Children Services has seen a dramatic increase in the number of children in agency custody; hence the number of children needing temporary and forever homes continues to be a concern,” Ream says.

In Cuyahoga County, Fletcher and Stanton say they have seen a steady increase over the last two years.

Buresch says in Geauga County there hasn’t been an increase in need for foster care, but foster parents are always needed.

The factors of why children are going into foster care hasn’t changed. The agencies

interviewed cited parental substance abuse as a main factor but also mental health, housing instability and domestic abuse.

“For many families that were already struggling, add the additional stress and anxiety parents and children are feeling during the uncertainty of this pandemic, the current crisis may make it even more difficult to keep their family safe,” Fletcher and Stanton says. “While we haven’t currently seen an increase in the number of kids in care due to coronavirus, that may change as this situation persists. Working from home, trying to learn remotely, worrying about job loss, fear of exposure to the virus and many more pressures would stress any family. Imagine being a parent struggling to put food on the table, trying to maintain sobriety or mental health without the support you need to remain stable, or struggling to manage a child’s difficult behaviors at home. Our agency is monitoring this situation closely and are working with our families to support them through this unique and challenging time.”

ADVICE FOR FUTURE PARENTS

Aimee Hubbert is the vice president of the Summit County Foster Parent Association, a non-profit organization. According to its website, it provides public advocacy for prevention of abuse and neglect of children, educates and supports foster families and helps champion a positive relationship with Summit County Children Services.

“Foster parents are vulnerable, compassionate and passionate about what we do,” Hubbert says.

For future parents, she encourages them to ask questions.

“We have learned so much,” Hubbert says. “One of the biggest challenges was recognizing there are so many differences in parenting.”

- CONTINUED ON PAGE 46 -

44 | Family Living at Its Best

- Foster Care Profiles • Sponsored Content -

D

o you have a stable home, an open heart and the willingness or desire to help a child in need? If the answer is yes, we need you – a child needs you. Please consider providing a foster home for a child in your community.

Foster care provides a safe, loving and supportive home for youth who are unable to live with their parents.

OhioG uidestone seeks people who are willing to answer the call, giving hope and healing to children going through difficult times.

Take a courageous step and become a foster parent. You won’t go it alone. We’ll be there every step of the way. OhioGuidestone offers ongoing, extensive training and support to all of our foster families. Round-the-clock social worker support is available every day of

the year. Additionally, we provide social events, educational opportunities and respite support.

As a leader in the field of behavioral health, OhioGuidestone has

been helping individuals throughout Ohio reset their paths, reclaim their autonomy and restore their purpose for more than 155 years.

We connect individuals with the resources needed to achieve lifelong success, providing community counseling, substance use disorder treatment, early childhood mental health services, workforce development training, foster care and more.

May 2020 - NortheastOhioParent.com

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- CONTINUED FROM PAGE 44 -

She also says building relationships with biological parents are crucial.

“You can act like a role model for those parents,” she says. “That relationship (will also) be important (as kids) get older and ask about their biological family. It’s important for them to know relationships were established — we care about their biological family.”

Reuniting parents with their children is an

46 | Family Living at Its Best

understood goal for foster parents. However, in some cases, unfortunately, reunification doesn’t happen.

“Oftentimes, foster parents provide permanency for children in their homes whose parents do not achieve reunification,” Ream says. “By providing permanent connections for children through foster care and adoption, children are likely to achieve better outcomes.“

Hubbert tells parents they should get attached, if not, you’re doing it wrong.”

“Not an easy thing to do, but in the end, it’s totally worth it,” she says. “You (can) change the entire trajectory of their life, whether providing them with safety or helping parents — you have a direct hand of what their life will look like.”

MAY 2020

Resources for Helping the Ones you Love

KEEPING CONNECTIONS TECHNOLOGY LETS FAMILIES KEEP IN TOUCH WITH GRANDPARENTS

By Jeannie Fleming-Gifford

RESIDENTS AT OLBV INTERACTING DIFFERENTLY. PHOTO BY MARY ELLEN LAYMAN

A car pulls into Krissy Klouda’s driveway. The car and the two individuals inside are familiar — it’s Bob and Cindy, Krissy’s parents and the grandparents to her three young boys.

But instead of these beloved grandparents exiting their car, hugging their grandsons and joining Krissy for a visit, Bob and Cindy simply sit and watch the boys play in the yard. They smile and wave to Klouda and her husband John at a safe distance from inside the car.

In fact, Bob and Cindy only open the car door to leave homemade baked goods and a pitcher of Bob’s “famous” iced tea for the family to enjoy before blowing kisses to say goodbye while backing out of the driveway to head home.

Two months ago, prior to the world

COVID-19 pandemic, this scene would have played out differently. Though the coronavirus has affected their lives and interactions with loved ones, families are still keeping connections.

DISTANCE INTERACTIONS Klouda’s parents live locally and are part of her family’s normal activities.

Bob, her dad, is a beloved high school coach whose biggest fans are his grandsons who are following their grandfather’s love of sports. Her mom, a retired nurse, shares her love of baking and has provided caregiving support for the Klouda family as Krissy and John balance professional responsibilities with the needs and activities of their sons.

With recent restrictions, Krissy and John have adjusted to new schedules, support and different interactions with her parents. In addition to daily - CONTINUED ON PAGE 48 -

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PAUL AND GREAT GRANDSONS SHARE ART. PHOTO BY KRISSY KLOUDA

FaceTime and a lot of phone calls, their sons have shown gratitude and keep connected to their grandparents by writing notes, drawing pictures and creating chalk art in their grandparents’ driveway. The family has found comfort in the ability to text and share updates and photos of simple daily activities from the boys doing homework to what food is being served for dinner.

Klouda has also been challenged to find new ways to connect with her grandparents Paul and Dorothy, both in their 90s.

Married for nearly 70 years, this local couple became separated earlier this year when health needs forced Dorothy to move into a nursing home. This transition was challenging and then amplified when restrictions were put in place that prohibited in-person visits.

Inspired by other stories of people visiting outside the windows of the nursing home, Klouda made a visit with her boys and grandfather. Though it wasn’t the same, the ability to see Dorothy smile through those windows and have an in-person, though different, interaction

was meaningful. As stay-at-home orders were put in place in Ohio, Paul also needed to limit his trips to his wife’s window.

For now, daily phone calls keep the two connected.

VIRTUALLY TOGETHER Stories like Paul and Dorothy’s have been the focus of Mary Ellen Layman, director of Program Services at Ohio Living Breckenridge Village. On a daily basis, she works to keep residents connected to their families. Typically, Layman’s job is to provide leadership and help coordinate all activities for residents in assisted living, skilled nursing and long-term care.

Generally, this work includes leading daily discussion groups, exercise classes, Bingo games, lectures, live music programs and a multitude of special events.

Now, with a focus on keeping residents healthy, group activities have been suspended and Layman and her team are engaged in daily one-on-one interactions with all residents, including daily FaceTime, Skype and Zoom calls from residents to their loved ones. Though this has been a challenging time, there have also been joyful moments, including being part of family reunions where siblings from across the country are now interacting simultaneously with their parents through a variety of technological options.

Layman says they are working on creative ways to keep residents communicating with loved ones while keeping them engaged in meaningful activities. They are sending cards to families from residents as well as working to capture residents’ posi-

MARY ELLEN LAYMAN

48 | Family Living at Its Best

- SPONSORED CONTENT -

tive messages on white boards and sending a picture to the family. Though it may not be the same, Layman says families should continue to reach out, especially to our senior citizens at facilities.

Not sure where to start? Be sure to use resources such as a facility’s activity director, she says, because they are working specifically to keep communications occurring regularly.

“We will explore every option we can,” Layman says.

Jeannie Fleming-Gifford is a writer, adventurer, arts lover, puppy raiser and mom.

MARY ELLEN LAYMAN AND A RESIDENT AT OLBV. PHOTO BY MARY ELLEN LAYMAN

Keeping PACE with McGregor

Lee Ann O’Brien, Chief Marketing Officer, The McGregor Foundation

Recognizing that the needs of seniors need to be met in accordance with their desires to age within the comfort of their own homes, McGregor offers a community-based program called PACE for individuals ages 55 and older.

The program provides different services that can be delivered in a participant’s home, including vision care, lab tests, dental care, hearing services, mental health services, emergency care and nursing care. An interdisciplinary team of physicians, nurses, personal care and home health aides, dietitians and therapists coordinate care that addresses the medical, rehabilitative, personal and social care needs of older adults. This is an ideal option for individuals who qualify for nursing home living but want to live safely at home.

The program currently serves about 600 individuals in Cuyahoga County. Statistically, the people enrolled in the PACE program often extends their longevity at home by two years.

Having that connection to community is vitally important to these individuals. Meanwhile, McGregor was recently awarded a $3.5 million U.S. Department of Housing and Urban Development grant, which will help the senior living provider build 54 new affordable senior housing units and renovate 26 recently vacated assisted living apartments at its East Cleveland campus. The grant also will help subsidize the cost of all 80 units for those seniors who are paying monthly rent. The HUD Section 202 grant was part of the $51 million in federal assistance that was awarded in February to nonprofit organizations around the U.S., which plan to add a combined 1,100 affordable homes for low-income seniors.

One of the industry’s biggest challenges in serving seniors is being able to provide safe and affordable housing. This grant will allow McGregor to leverage community partnerships and look for other revenue streams that can help aid in serving lower-income older adults.

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#CLE MAMA

Move Forward and Keep Good Family Changes

SARA CARNES • Facebook = Sara Carnes • Instagram = saracarnes4

A

s I’m sitting here writing this, my entire family is home. I’m not sure what our world will look like by the time you’re reading this, but I’m going to guess at this point all our lives have all changed somewhat.

Both my girls are at home taking classes online for school, which has been a huge change for all of us I know. My oldest had to leave her freshman year of college where she was thriving, and my youngest in 4th grade misses her friends so much.

But even though being in our home for so long has brought some challenges, it really has brought us together so much more. And I’m hearing this from a lot of families. We haven’t gone crazy yet, and my husband and I still like each other — ha! I’m taking lots of pictures and actually planning on making a photo album of all the things we’ve been doing as family to remember this, once we’re back to our new normal.

I mean I have to take a picture of my husband wiping down groceries for 20 minutes in the garage before bringing them in, otherwise I’m not sure our grandkids will believe it.

My youngest daughter is actually creating a time capsule book so she’ll be able to remember her experience for years to come too. I want to share three ways we’ve changed as a family during the quarantine — and I hope we don’t forget about them.

1

We’re playing a lot more board games and doing puzzles. Actually, we put together our very first family puzzle. Fun tip, put a puzzle together then use Mod Podge to glue it and have every person in the family sign the back with the year. You’ll always remember the puzzle you did during the quarantine. I hope we’ll be instituting a family game/puzzle night movie forward for good.

2 3

My kids are becoming more independent. My 9-year-old daughter made some healthy peanut butter cookies on her own the other day. I taught her how to do her own laundry and wash the dishes. I definitely will appreciate the help moving forward.

We’re spending a lot more quality time together. We’re doing so many things with each other that we normally wouldn’t be doing — or maybe that we would have ever done together. I even agreed to a “blind makeover”

challenge in the midst of finding ways to have some fun. And ya know what? It was fun. I’m sure I would have never done that before though. Probably way too busy. We also had a paint party and painted “kindness rocks” together. That was so fun. So many different things that we normally wouldn’t be doing. I’m just finding the gratitude in all of this. I hope you are too.

I know this is tough. It is for us too. We just continue to try and find the bright side of things. If you look close enough you’ll always find them. I’ve said from the beginning I feel like this whole experience is going to be transformative for all us in some way. And I think we’ll all appreciate each other and everything we all bring to the world a lot more.

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