Nexus 2016 Issue 16

N.16 / V.48

PLAGIARISM — THE ULTIMATE STUDENT CRIME PAGE 16

Clarence Street 7am – 10pm, 7 days a week. Phone (07) 839-4056

Budget Coffee 90g

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Pams Chips 150g 4 for

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Budget Chopped Tomatoes 400g

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FEATURES 16 Plagiarism: The Ultimate Student Crime Onyx Lily

18

18 "Criminal White Power Gangster to Christian Māori Psychologist" Interview by Brittany Rose

20 Hate Crimes: Fear & Loathing in 2016 Jared Wooldridge

16

NEWS & OPINION

20

ARTS & CULTURE

FUN & GAMES

02

Lettuce

14

Covered

10

Entertainment

03

Uni News

15

Arts

12

Reviews

04

Nexus News

15

Auteur

30

Snapped

07

Sports

22

Your Space

31

Blind Date

08

CARE

29

Head Chef

32

Puzzles

COLUMNS

ON THE COVER BEN WHITEHOUSE

26

That Time I...

Busted too Many Nuts

26

Modern Day Mixtape

Tiny Little Houses

27

The I.T. Guy

TedxRuakura II

27

Just the Tip

Visit France

28

Hari Korero

Life as a White Māori at UoW

28

YWRC

Toxic Workplace

EDITOR Editorial NEXUS MAGAZINE Brittany Rose editor@nexusmag.co.nz DEPUTY EDITORS Lyam Buchanan

EDITORIAL APOLOGIES FOR MY CRIMES BRITTANY ROSE

lyam@nexusmag.co.nz Bronwyn Laundry bronwyn@nexusmag.co.nz DESIGN Olivia Paris

Before we continue, dear reader, I urge you to reflect. Remember that detention you got at High School, or the isolation of being sent to your room for time out. Reflect on your crimes, reflect on the rules and hearts you’ve broken. Look back, and count the Bad Things you’ve done. You naughty, naughty reader.

design@nexusmag.co.nz MANAGING EDITOR James Raffan james@nexusmag.co.nz

To ease your guilt* I’ve compiled a non-exhaustive list of (totally sincere) apologies for crimes I have committed: •

I want to make peace with the wicked actions of my 17 year old self. While enrolled in school, I wagged to work. Although the clothing I sold definitely deserved a call to the Fashion Police, that wasn’t my crime. Truanting breached the law. I should’ve been locked up.

•

At 17 in a fit of rebellion with no respect for authority I frequented the BottleMart of

Matthew Rae Jared Wooldridge Rory Davis Joshua Morris Peter Dornauf

the store’s liquor licence. I should never have asked my older friends to break the law

Dr. Richard Swainson

I repent for breaching the conditions of my licence. On my restricted I drove a drunken friend home at night, after ten. I should have told her to walk from Ham East to St Andrew’s. This breach of vehicular justice is inexcusable.

•

Tom Collopy Freddy Walker

Cook Street (RIP). I fueled an unhealthy fondness for cheap tequila and jeoparadised for the sake of Jose Cuervo.

•

CONTRIBUTORS

Onyx Lily Hymen Heaver Henry Nina Fox Mel Martin Sarah Hyde

Indecent exposure is a crime to which I confess. I am sorry Raglan. I am sorry for stripping in the ocean. I should never have exposed my bare skin to the night sky

COVER

that New Years (although, my body looked damn fine in the summer of 2012, so the

Ben Whitehouse

exposure was pretty decent, imo).

•

I feel remorse for my wicked ways. Illicit substances are illegal for a reason, and I shall never again let the call of MaryJane tempt me, nor the thrill of Molly. Those bitches are bad news.

*Unless you’re into sexual assault, murder or tax evasion. In that case, fuck you, let that guilt fester.

Welcome to the Crime Issue, leave your guilt at the door and explore the University Underworld with Onyx Lily as she explores academic injustice (p.16). On a more serious note, Jared Wooldridge tried to get his head around murderous hate crimes (p.20), and I sit down with a former gang member for a chat that had me internally screaming at the sexism and racism that were commonplace in his history (p.18).

ADVERTISING advertising@nexusmag.co.nz ONLINE facebook.com/nexusNZ @nexusmag Spotify: nexusmagazine OFFICES Ground Floor, Student Union Building Gate One, University of Waikato Knighton Road, Hamilton

Read on, and send your crime confessions to lettuce@nexusmag.co.nz, we’ll absolve you of your indiscretions. Again, unless they’re rape, murder or fraud.

ISSUE 16 CRIME 8 AUGUST 2016

1

NEXUS MAGAZINE Lettuce

NEW VISION FOR CAMPUS

AV AN AVO

BAY OF NOT MUCH

AVORAGE

Well thank you very much for your consideration. As a first year, second

I have a feeling the person who does Entertainment has an avocado

semester University of Waikato student I am offended. I don't honestly

addiction they need to seek treatment for, it’s been in the Hot section so

know how many University of Waikato students we have here in the Bay,

much recently.

but we are your members. It seems to me that the only focus in your Vision is on the Hamilton Campus or am I just reading the Hamilton copy

Heated avo tastes gross though. Editor

of your vision? You are obviously looking at spending $millions there but what about us at Tauranga? What are we getting out of this vision apart from your consideration?

‘GAY’ MEANS HAPPY

I believe we do have a WSU rep here, although I have never officially

UNHAPPY UMBRELLA

been made aware of who they are, or how to contact them. I have had information given to me before lectures about Māori support services,

So I decided as a student under the LGBTIQIAA umbrella, or however

learning support services, disabled support services and practically every

many letters that abbreviation has now, to visit Uni-Q. I found the

other kind of support services offered, but nothing about the Student

Cowshed on Wednesday leading to a cramped, dingy room filled with an

Union. I know to go and ask questions at the information centre, or ask

assortment of people. Packed like sardines in a sad, rainbow can.

to see our student representative at Maharaia if I have any problems.

I perched on a broken couch for ten minutes desperate for conversation.

I think that we at the Tauranga Campuses are worth more effort from you

I was met with varying degrees of success. All of them dismal. The

than we currently receive. Hell I don't even know if copies of Nexus are

atmosphere comparable to an American 1980's high school clique.

available in Tauranga, or is it just an online magazine. I remember O Week

Complete with scoffing at strangers, disdain and disinterest.

there was a WSU stand, but my timetable didn't allow me time to stop

After ten, socially awkward, minutes notices were yelled out. For half

and get info. Heck i didn't even have time to grab a sausage in bread.

an hour. People I hadn't been introduced to alternated between yelling,

How about maybe stepping up and spending some time and maybe a few dollars, here in Tauranga at Windermere and Bongard and letting us

arguing or telling others to quieten down. I examined mud on my shoes, examined my nails and considered life my life at high school.

get to know you. Not just appearing at O Week and such events. Look

I advise against anyone going to Uni-Q — I'd be gay somewhere where I

forward to hearing from you.

feel accepted or you know where people will talk to me.

Have you ever heard of paragraphs? They’re used to organise your

It’s really not my place to have an opinion on Uni-Q. Sorry you had a

ideas in your writing. The lack of structure in this wall of text makes me

crap time? Editor

suspicious that you didn’t put any effort into organising your thoughts here. Especially since you counter each of your complaints with a solution. I will keep my personal thoughts and feelings towards Bay of Plenty in general to myself. Editor

COVER ART :) The colours on the sex cover were so cool especially with the shiny paper.

NOT QUITE SWEATER WEATHER PLZ HELP

IKR! Abigail Jensen is fricking cool. Editor

Is there someone we can contact to help perform an Anti-Rain Dance on

Disclaimer Letters published contain the opinion of the writer and the

the Village Green? The on-again off-again rain is really ruining my outfit

writer alone. Nexus publications take no responsibility for the content

aesthetic.

or opinions so expressed. By submitting your letter you give consent

Come on, the only acceptable thing about winter is turtlenecks. And scarves. And slim pants with a cute jacket and ankle boots. Just ignore

to its publication in Nexus and subsequent public scrutiny. Letters are the authors own work and Nexus will not edit to compensate for lack of intelligence or coherency. Nexus reserves the right to edit or refuse to

the rain because winter works wonders for fashion — as long as you

publish any letter which breaches any law, is defamatory to any person,

don’t wear a fucking puffer jacket or gumboots. Editor

or contains threats of violence or hate speech.

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CRIME

News from the University NEXUS MAGAZINE

BCMS graduate Sjoerd de Feijter and his team from Gallagher were the winners

ONYA

CYBER CHAMPS

of the New Zealand Cyber Security Challenge last month.

BACK FROM NEPAL Masters student Kristie Baillie just got back from a five-week stay

KUPE SCHOLARS

in Nepal, where she was volunteering as an English teacher in the

Te Wairere Ngaia (pictured), Te

small town of Phidim.

Wharekotua Morrison-Hare, Jane Caffery, D'Arcy Pomare and Kerrian Duff have each won Kupe Scholarships. This covers course fees, a $15,000 study allowance and mentoring.

RESEARCH WITH IMPACT Masters student Samantha Williams is researching the long-term impact Mild Traumatic Brain Injuries (MTBI) have on

PACIFIC INTERNS New Zealand Aid Pacific Scholars Alicia Gawi, Mercy Kalman and Ana

New Zealanders.

Koloamatangi Tupou (pictured) have each been accepted into the NZ Scholarships Undergraduate Student Summer Internship Programme.

Full stories available at waikato.ac.nz/news-events. Got a story to share? Email meganb@waikato.ac.nz.

SUMMER RESEARCH SCHOLARSHIPS

SHOW OFF YOUR RESEARCH

The New Zealand Blood Service is

Want a summer job that involves real-

The Three Minute Thesis (3MT) is a

on campus every day this week until

world research and academic experience?

masters student competition with the

Thursday 11 August, from 10am-2.30pm in

Check out the $5000 Summer Research

winner taking home a $1000 research

the UniRec Centre. Call 0800 GIVE BLOOD

Scholarship projects available at

grant and a place in the national final.

to make an appointment or just drop-in —

waikato.ac.nz/scholarships.

Visit waikato.ac.nz/go/3mt for more info.

remember to take ID.

Applications close 31 August.

Registrations close 12 August.

NOMINATE FOR BLUES

VOLUNTEER YOUR ENGLISH SKILLS

RECOGNISING TOP TEACHERS

If you or someone you know is at the

Every Friday, 6pm-7.30pm, volunteers (just

Do you know a great lecturer or tutor who

top of their creative or performing art, or

like you) get together to help non-English

deserves some recognition? Nominate

sport — make a nomination for the 2016

speakers brush up on their conversational

them for a Teaching Excellence Award

Blues Awards. Visit waikato.ac.nz/events/

English skills. It’s called the English

at waikato.ac.nz/pod/nomination.

blues/ for more info. Nominations close

Learners’ Corner. Sound like a bit of you?

Nominations close 2 September.

12 August.

Email waikato.golden.key@gmail.com to become a volunteer.

Go to iWaikato or Student eNews for more information and other need-to-knows.

NEED TO KNOW

GIVE BLOOD. SAVE LIVES

NEXUS MAGAZINE News

MAYORAL CANDIDATE CHRIS SIMPSON: DAVID BENNETT DOPPLEGANGER INTERVIEW BY JAMES RAFFAN

Thank you for taking the time out of your schedule of baby kissing, hand

On a serious note though, labels like centre-right, centre-left don’t really work

shaking and senior citizen placating to do a quick interview with student

in local government the way they do in central government. Local government

media. To prepare for this interview Nexus read through all your campaign

is more about community empowerment and solving problems, which means

material and your website. Just reading your personal story we detected a

being willing to step outside strict ideological lines and work with everybody.

pattern. You’re a Hamiltonian who moved to Hamilton, who loves being a Hamiltonian and went to Hamilton Boys High, your partner is a Hamiltonian

Is there a chance you are actually David Bennett from the future coming

and you want to be mayor of Hamilton. Is that a little heavy on the Hamilton?

back to save us from ourselves? Thanks for the compliment — but let's face it

Well, what I forgot to mention in my campaign material is that my grandmother

David got all the looks. I'm more one of those poor David Bennett "look a like"

was born in Hamilton, Scotland and her son (my dad) was born in Hamilton, New

imitators who turns up to 50th birthday parties pretending to be him. I make a

Zealand (true story). I cried when I found out that my parents chose the name

good $27.33 an hour doing it though. There's at least three of us "David Bennett"

Christopher Simpson over their second choice of Hamilton McHamilton — which

imitators in Hamilton and there's plenty of room in the market — we all make a

even today is my preferred moniker.

reasonable living out of it.

Tell us why would someone with your economic background, skills, and

On a more serious note the CBD is like a ghost town at the moment with the

history want to be Mayor? At 47, I’m at the right age where I have the energy

central business district missing the business part, as Mayor what can you

and have learned enough about the ways that cities work. I know where I can

do to revitalise the city? There are a number of key things to revitalise a city.

bring my skills to issues, and where I need to rely on experts and the community

For starters, getting people living in it is a must. Investment in safety and quality

for solutions. Being Mayor is no longer just a ceremonial thing or a job for people

amenities like parks etc is a big part of this, and we need to attract the relevant

who want to ‘be in politics’. It comes with a unique set of challenges that — given

businesses and retail offering which a modern CBD must provide. Getting the

my background — really excites me.

district plan right and opening up to the river are important too. The role council has to play in all of this is providing certainty and clarity regarding its investment

Doesn’t most of the actual power to effect change happen at a CEO level

both in the below infrastructure and above ground amenity. Understanding the

for the council? Most of the actual power to effect change comes from the

customer (you) is vital, and getting the economic understanding as to what

great council staff working with customers. The CE's role, in my opinion, is about

the customer wants is a major driver. However, the real big game changer is

letting people get on with the job they are engaged to do and supporting them

leadership regarding what the CBD has to offer. This will come from the Council,

to achieve.

passionate Hamilton leaders and myself as Mayor.

As a centre right leaning, follicly challenged, middle aged man with strong

Is it simply a case of removing some of the need to pay for parking or is that

ties to the National Party did you simply look at David Bennett’s career and

an over simplification? Paid parking is definitely part of the problem. The other

think “Well if he can do it anyone can?” Look.....I have to admit that I'm kind of

complaints I hear are around people not knowing where the parking is, and then

envious that David has more hair than me — seriously how did he get so lucky?

always having to have coins on them to be able to pay. Seriously who uses coins

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CRIME

News NEXUS MAGAZINE

to pay for parking these days? We need better technology and information that shows where parking is in real time, and lets people pay smarter.

As the guy running on his economic background the real question is are we too late? Is the council able to manage money or will we get excited at the prospects of race cars and river fronts again? Now that is a great question on

CHRIS SIMPSON QUICK QUESTIONS

the old 'the more we get the more we spend' issue. From my perspective I get

To finish off we thought we would ask you some short answer

excited about investing in capital that makes a return. Better benefit cost analysis

questions to make you seem more human…

is needed in Hamilton regarding any investments.

For a few years you worked closely with Uncle Jim, (beloved University Chancellor and frequent Koru Club greeter) in a field dominated by mayoral

What was the last film you watched? Star Wars the Force Awakens — please don't tell the Star Trek fans out there though — they won't vote for me.

candidates who would or should identify as centre right (Southgate, Pascoe, King) how do you differentiate yourself? Ah yes, my days as Director of Research

What was the last gig / concert you attended? Mystery Creek

in Parliament were during intense times in NZ under Uncle Jim — he was great

Fieldays, that's a gig right? Gotta love those tractor races and

to work for. However, what really differentiates me is that my Waikato University

even saw David Bennett in the distance. He was hanging out

education took my career to some interesting places, first outside of Hamilton

with the centre-right cool kids.

and then back to Hamilton again. Along with having worked at Parliament, I’ve had a broad career that has ranged from being an advisor in international trade

What is the most embarrassing thing in your wardrobe? Ask

and working in the NZ Institute (Think Tank), before coming back home to be

my partner Danielle — she actually has presented me a list of

near family three years ago. As a result I’ve got good connections in Auckland,

what she wants gone.

Wellington and internationally, which are really important for a city like Hamilton, and at the same time I’ve managed to build up good connections with the

What book could you read over and over again?

community in Hamilton too.

1984 by George Orwell

Recently NZUSA put together a Student City Charter. We have come up with

What is the stupidest thing you have ever done on a bet or

some of our own. Can you run us through your positions on some of the issues raised point by point: Cheaper transport options for students (or an

dare? As a kid/teenager we rode horses most weekends. I think I was about 12 and was dared to ride Red (a horse) bareback with

extension of student fares to include University Students)? The unfortunate

no bridle — just control him by using his mane — let's just say

thing is buses have actually gotten more expensive for everybody when, with

that it ended in blood and tears.

a growing city in a growing region, we need more people catching buses. You used to be able to buy a ticket and have a two hour transfer time. Then that

What was your craziest University story? It was a dark and

time was cut in half. It’s all cost-cutting at the Regional Council which the City

stormy night in L1 during 1988.... you can find out more at

Council doesn’t have much control over, but that doesn’t mean we can’t try to

simpsonformayor.co.nz

do something for students and everybody else. But transport isn’t just buses, it’s other options like a walkable and more cycle-friendly city too.

The provision of light rail services to allow students from Huntly, Te Awamutu, Tokoroa and other places access to study options? It sounds like a good idea, but there needs to be the population to support the infrastructure costs of light rail, before it can become a real option.

A Rental Warrant of Fitness including heating? As a previous renter, this has been an issue for me in the past! Especially in Hamilton East, I know there are issues with a lot of the older houses. My understanding is that all landlords have to ensure there is floor and ceiling insulation installed by August 2019. Heating shouldn’t be treated as a nice-to-have.

A higher minimum wage? (Technically not a local council issue but indulge us) Actually this is a great question and you are right it's not a Local Council issue.

Feel free to ask my doppelganger — David Bennett — this question. My personal view is that wages need to keep up with inflation, particularly given the rising house prices, which I know will impact a lot of you soon, if not already.

Recycling of pizza boxes? Definitely an issue, and I understand that the Council is working with the waste company to rectify.

Permanent bottle bins in student areas? Seems logical enough!

5

NEXUS MAGAZINE News

NEWS REDUNDANCIES, RETIREMENTS & RESIGNATIONS BRITTANY ROSE

Last week, following some rather grumpy lettuce, Nexus took the concerns of

Have there been any changes to the range or number of papers offered by

students from the Faculty of Education (FoE) to the University. The students

Faculty of Education? Not as a direct result of the Staffing Plan. Some changes

were affected by significant changes in the delivery of compulsory papers —

always occur near the commencement of a semester, usually based on enrolment

a shift from in-class to online. A University spokesperson stated that changes

numbers in individual papers.

of this kind are “standard practice” and not as a “result of the Staffing Plan”.

However, 2016 has been a big year of change for FoE. Since May 2016, 17 positions have ceased to exist within the Faculty. Read on to see what the University spokesperson had to say about the Staffing Plan.

When Nexus interviewed a spokesperson for the University in May the Faculty of Education were in a consultation period over proposed staffing cuts as a result of declining EFTS within the faculty. What were the results of the consultation period? In terms of the specific positions identified for disestablishment, the changes from the Proposed Staffing Plan to the final Staffing Plan were not substantive. However, within the consultation period

Nexus has spoken to a number of students who will go on the record and a few lecturers and support staff who will not and the general sentiment is that there has been an increase in the amount of papers some FoE staff members teach, and an intensification of classes per day. Are there instances where staff have taken on more papers going into B Semester than initially planned at the beginning of the year? Yes, a staffing reduction of this kind means that there will be a need for some staff to take on teaching responsibilities that were not anticipated at the beginning of the year. However, it is important to understand that the Faculty was overstaffed, so there is capacity for increasing the teaching workloads of many staff.

a number of staff made the decision to resign or retire or take voluntary

According to the Academic Workload Guidelines there is an expectation

redundancy (see below). One change to the final plan, in response to staff

that leadership within faculties should “ensure that academic workloads are

concerns over increased workloads in Semester B, was to offer some staff partial

reasonable and manageable so that staff can maintain appropriate work/

redundancy with immediate effect, and the remainder with effect after Semester

life balance and physical and mental wellbeing is not endangered.” Is this

B. Some staff took this option.

guideline being adhered to? Yes, the Faculty's Heads of Schools are very mindful that in the allocation of additional teaching the University's Workload

At the time there was a proposal to “reduce staff members by 16.28 FTE”, how

Guidelines must be adhered to. This is being carefully managed and monitored.

many FTE staff were cut following consultation? Between early May and June there was a reduction of eight positions (7.65 FTE). This included one resignation

Why are the fees for online papers and on-campus papers the same? The

(0.65 FTE), three retirements (3.0 FTE), and four voluntary redundancies (4.0

course content is the same, the same amount of work and effort from the

FTE). During this time there were also two redeployments (2.0 FTE), one with

academic goes into the papers, and the University faces the same costs whether

a reduction to 0.6 FTE. In late June, nine positions (8.1 FTE) were disestablished

papers are delivered online or in-person.

resulting in forced redundancies.

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News NEXUS MAGAZINE

SPORTS OPINION OLYMPICS SEVENS TOM COLLOPY

On August 9th the All Blacks Sevens side will begin their quest to become Olympic champions, to stand atop the Olympic podium with gold medals around their necks, singing our National Anthem as the New Zealand flag is raised for the been a part of the New Zealand Sevens side for over four years now and achieved

SPORTS OPINION TWO TIERED TESTING

the highest level of success, namely a Commonwealth Games Silver medal and

FREDDY WALKER

whole world to see. A member of this team is Waikato native, Joe Webber. Joe has

three World Series Titles. He is a vital member of the side with his blistering pace, lightning fast footwork and staunch defence. Joe is definitely an asset on both sides of the ball. I was fortunate enough to have the chance to ask Joe a few questions before he departed for the Olympics.

Cricket may bore you, and test matches in particular may be as interesting as watching paint dry at times, but they can

What was your initial reaction when you found out you’d made the Rio Squad?

be salvaged. The shorter format of the game may have taken

Stoked bro, but at the same time still worried if my shoulder will hold up.

prominence with viewers over the past few years but I have a

Having been in the NZ Sevens system now for over 4 years and having played

proposition which will make test matches great again.

on Sevens’ biggest stages how is your confidence heading into Rio? More

Currently the Blackcaps are in Zimbabwe and we are a class

nervous due to the fact that I wasn’t cleared for contact on my shoulder until two

above them. We completely dominated the first test, winning

weeks before the Olympics. Also not playing since the start of February doesn’t

by an innings and 117 runs. To be fair, we will do the same in

help the confidence too much either.

the second test and anything less would be a failure from our

What impact has your coach, Gordon Tietjens, had in helping you come back from injury this year, and how has he pushed you to make the Olympic Squad?

Not much help haha, both him and the team physio. Though I was ruled out, so a lot of it was on me to push the boundaries and keep telling them I’d be sweet. I am really grateful that Titch had faith in me to do the job after being out for so long.

What goals have been set for the team heading into the Olympics? Do you have any personal goals? The team’s first goal is to top our pool, after we achieve that then we focus on winning gold. Personally, I would like to win our defence award at the end of the tournament.

perspective. Don’t get me wrong, watching us win is something I can certainly get used to, but it just isn’t the same as watching a hard win against a team like Australia or England. Knowing that we were going to tour countries like these would gain viewer interest tenfold what this current series is getting.

The main reason that test cricket is becoming less and less popular as opposed to 50 over and twenty20’s is because of the divide between the nations. The way to fix this is to create a two tiered system. This would include the top four or five ranked nations playing off against each other, and the bottom ranked

In 2014 you guys won silver at the Commonwealth Games. Does the team

sides doing the same. It would see much closer matches and

believe that they can go one better and win Gold at the Olympics. Yeah man.

capture fans’ interest a whole lot more, therefore creating more

the boys are confident, a lot of us were a part of that Commonwealth Games side

revenue from these matches.

and have grown a lot since then.

The Blackcaps definitely sit in the upper tier of my proposed

I would like to wish Joe and the boys good luck on their endeavour. Bring the gold back home to NZ boys! If you would like to watch and support both of the NZ Sevens sides compete in Rio here’s when they will be playing their pool games.

Their games following pool play will depend on their results.

system. It would see us play teams which we may not always beat, but we would gain more revenue from tests and the nation would watch. The proposed change can only be good for the sport in New Zealand and all over the world. We wouldn’t be stuck playing Sri Lanka over and over again which is one-sided

NZ Women’s vs Kenya

Sunday 7th August, 2.30am

NZ Men vs Japan

Wednesday 10th August, 3.30am

NZ Women’s vs Spain

Sunday 7th August, 7.30am

NZ Men vs Kenya

Wednesday 10th August, 8.30am

is the pinnacle of the game. The International Cricket Council

NZ Women’s vs France

Monday 8th August, 2.30am

should bring their heads together and sort out a two-tiered

NZ Men vs Great Britain

Thursday 11th August, 3.30am

system, before they lose the best thing about the sport.

and always happens.

Instead of canning test cricket, this is the way to go. The players certainly don’t want test cricket gone from the calendar and it

7

NEXUS MAGAZINE CARE

EXPERIENCE UNIVERSITY CHALLENGE University Challenge (UC) is a televised quiz show that started in New Zealand in 1976, modeled after the UK series. In 1989, fortunately a year Waikato won, the show folded and did not resume until Tom Conroy — a Massey alumnus who had hoped to appear in the 1990 series — revived the show for a new generation, in 2014. This, incidentally, makes Waikato the longest-standing University Challenge champions of all time, with a tenure of 25 years.

University Challenge pits all eight NZ universities against each other in a tense series of games. There are questions about art, science, geography, history, politics, and random music the quizmaster used to like. Nexus spoke to our 2016 UoW team to find out a bit more about what got them into University Challenge and their thoughts on game shows in general.

The 2016 team are hosting a campus-wide quiz tournament on August 6th to give

DIRECTOR BIO MATTHEW RAE

students a little taste of what University Challenge is all about.

Asking a person to describe themselves is similar to asking a STEFFAN VAN LIESHOUT

spade what it does for a living. We both know who we are

I first came to be involved in UC after I saw the Waikato UC Team compete in 2013.

and what we do so it’s hard to put it in words. I was born

I actually thought “I can do better” than some team members that represented

in Whangarei, lived on a farm for 18 years then moved to

Waikato. It turned out that some people heard what I was thinking, by the audible

Hamilton to study Engineering, that was before I dropped out

reply “gummon” and “dooze it bro”. So, here I am second year on the team repping

and changed to Comp Sci. I love music and started my own

Te Reo Māori, in the hope of encouraging more Māori to enhance their CV's, and get

company with some friends to help facilitate musicians. I’m

their cuzzy's saying 'chur' or 'ya f#$&@! that one ow'. In summing up (legal jargon)

also one of the new Directors for the WSU.

we have a great team this year and great coaches who both are UC alumni, who have a love for UC. So here’s the challenge, next year sign up for the team, bling your CV or just make the team to find true love. Mauri ora.

My portfolio consists of FASS and Sport and Leisure. Because I’m new I’m still trying to find my place, but we have an Inter -Faculty Sports Competition in the works. All students are more than welcome to participate. If you’re interested, contact your

ROSE SWEARS I got quizzing by doing pub quiz questions with a bunch of cops on a quiet night shift in my first proper job, and having the sergeant get annoyed that his guys were being shown up by a teenager. So the obvious thing for me to do was to try

faculty and let them know who you are. We’re trying to create a sense of pride amongst students when it comes to their faculty and try to break down the barriers between faculties.

out for UC 2015.

I personally hope that this event will be the first of many to show

If I could play any quiz game, I’d pick Who Wants to Be a Millionaire, because broke

off what students at the University of Waikato can do. During

student life, and because that’s the best pay for answering twenty questions I’ve

my short time here I hope to help out as much as possible and

never heard of.

make the most of this opportunity I’ve been given.

BRENDAN MADLEY I've always loved quizzes and having the opportunity to use all the random knowledge that I've accumulated over years. I competed in the 2014 series and am happy to be back, hopefully a little wiser and smarter.

I would love to compete in Who Wants to Be a Millionaire because a) you get real money, and b) the questions can be really challenging but you always have a 25% chance! Unfortunately, Mike Hosking hosted the NZ version (is that why it was canned after one season...?)

AVISH RAM I am a very passionate quizzer and from a young age took great interest in acquiring and building up my arsenal of general knowledge across multiple subjects. University Challenge proved to be the perfect opportunity for me to showcase my knowledge and talent and to represent my respective educational institution at such a prestigious event.

I would love to appear on The Chase. The Chase is a fast paced, high octane and exhilarating contest in which I would have the opportunity to engage in a battle of wits against some of the most colossal minds in the quizzing world.

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team The University Challenge

WAIKATO STUDENTS’ UNION PRESENTS

DR SUJIT & BARNALI BRAHMOCHARY 16TH AUGUST, 12 - 2PM, LEVEL ZERO The Institution for Indian Mother and Child welcomes professionals, students, teachers and others to volunteer between 1‑3 months.

Working in a developing country is not easy but the experience will help you grow personally and professionally. Gain valuable career experience, learn new and diversified skills, and make a hands on contribution to the fight against poverty.

It will be an experience you will never forget, with insight into health and development in India and the chance to learn about Indian culture.

To hear more or to get involved, come along and listen to Dr Sujit speak.

iimcmission.org

NEXUS MAGAZINE Entertainment

PLEASE DON’T QUOTE ME

HOTTEST TO THE NOTTEST

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the third week back at Uni.

• Sleeping through lectures and

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• Unexpected visits from your

finding out it’s cancelled

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loving landlord • Tricking people into thinking you’re a 9/10 with Snapchat filters

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next to you • Getting trapped in Kylie Jenner’s wig closet

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empty but someone still sits to next you

Saatchi & Saatchi, Kevin Roberts

Britney, on her educational endeavours.

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NEXUS MAGAZINE

FILM JASON BOURNE JARED WOOLDRIDGE

Okay, so we’re dealing with another sequel coming out a decade after the story was apparently finished. It seems all the rage nowadays, if they can make it seem different and adapt it to the changing times. Jason Bourne tries, but really, there’s nothing here that hasn’t already been covered — three times. If you’ve seen the others, you know the formula by now; hell, if you’ve seen the Honest Trailer, you know the formula, and Jason Bourne doesn’t stray.

So, we have Matt Damon, aka Jason Bourne. He now knows who he is, and he’s in hiding, in an Icelandic fight club (oops), but proving he’s not too old for this shit, he’s drawn back into his usual adventures before long. There’s still something about his past he doesn’t know, there’s still a CIA that wants to bring him in or put him down, and there’s still a shady government plot being driven by a shady government bureaucrat. Although they have Tommy Lee Jones as that guy, and he brings his best gruff and ornery side, so that’s always fun.

It’s just so typical now. The Bourne films, when they first came out, were all cool and shaky-cam action; now that’s just the norm for spy films. Even James Bond

MUSIC LITTLE UNEASY

BY FAZERDAZE

began using some of their stuff. There’s nothing new to mine here, no big reason why Jason Bourne had to come back, other than the usual story he’s already been through three times. It’s still well-made, everyone’s on top form, but we never needed another Bourne. He’s not Bond; we don’t need 50 years of Matt Damon,

LYAM BUCHANAN

the trilogy was enough.

Certain indie bands are far too self absorbed. I don’t care about their political views or that they’re good people because of the way they dispose of their cigarettes. All I give a shit about is their sound, and how deep in the pit of ironic self hatred they are. simply ‘Girl in bedroom on guitar’. That’s all I need. I’m fucking sold.

FILM THE ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW

Even if I had never listened to their music prior to my obligatory

RORY DAVIS

Auckland grown band Fazerdaze don’t fuck around. Their bio is

social media stalk I would’ve known I was already in love.

Fazerdaze perfectly captures the aesthetic of everyone who's ever enjoyed something even slightly alternative wishes they could achieve. That style of perfect imperfections comes across not only in their image, but also throughout their sound. The new single ‘Little Uneasy’ is definitely no exception to this. The tone of the guitar has that carefree ‘I’m an emotional teen who can’t be fucked changing the settings on my amp’ sound, if you’ve ever even tried to be musical you’ll understand the beauty of this. Obviously a lot of time and effort went into creating such

Cheesy yet brilliant musical numbers, transsexual aliens in fishnets and an awkward newly-wed couple, if that doesn’t scream brilliant cinema then I don’t know what does. Written by New Zealand’s own, Richard O’Brien, the film follows newlyweds Brad and Janet on their eventful and somewhat unfortunate honeymoon. Without delving into the fine details of the film’s plot too much I will say that O’Brien must have been smoking some serious stuff when he wrote the screenplay for this film.

The fact that this film even got made continues to astound me every time I rewatch this cult classic.

a perfect tone, however it’s so fitting that if it was accidental I

I can honestly say that there are very few elements of this film that actually make

wouldn’t be surprised.

sense, the film is truly one messed up piece of cinema. But it’s a beautiful one.

Fazerdaze takes the garageband sound and turns it into their own vibe. Maybe they were the first to realise that playing in a garage either gets really fucking cold or far too moist? Their tracks still carry the homemade and seemingly unproduced

A film that is truly of one a kind, and in this day and age originality and success are two elements that are scarcely paired together within the medium of cinema.

Consequently in spite of the film’s sexual and disturbing nature it is easy to see why it has become such a timeless piece of cinema.

sound of a garageband but with added comfort you’d get from a

On a final note I feel I should state that if you are not a fan of cheesy yet brilliant

bedroom, I’m sure you understand what I’m getting at. It’s more

musical numbers or would get spanked by your parents for watching something

likely that I’ve just lost the plot and need to sleep for a week but

moderately explicit then this probably isn’t the film for you. That being said if

either way you should definitely be giving Fazerdaze a listen on

you feel like being strangely aroused by something other than the sound of your

Bandcamp and a cheeky stalk on Facebook.

flatmates having sex definitely give this film a watch.

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Reviews NEXUS MAGAZINE

POETRY INTERLUNAR

BY MARGARET ATWOOD JOSHUA MORRIS

I have only read parts of A Handmaid’s Tale and some of Atwood’s Booker Prize winning behemoth, The Blind Assassin, but from reading this poetry collection Interlunar, it is clear her strong suit is in that of poetry. Her prose bears a liquid quality that hangs light over the page, here, that is taken to its extreme. The book is split into two sections, the first is called ‘Snake Poems’ which is predictably focused on representations of the snake, from biological, through to phallic and Biblical.

“Pinned down, this one/ opens its mouth as wide as it can/ showing fangs and a throat/like the view down a pink lily,/ double tongue curved out like stamens.”

Is the gorgeous opening stanza to ‘Lesson on Snakes’. It embodies a rich sensuality that vibrates with intensity.

The second and much larger part is named after the title of the book ‘Interlunar’ which is also split into two numbered parts. She blends religious with mundane with a quiet intensity in ‘The Healer’

FILM TRAILER JUSTICE LEAGUE RORY DAVIS

“Nobody here/ needs anyone raised from the dead, it’s too/ confusing, and with the notices/ already sent forth.”

The lightness displayed in her prose is made even more stunning under the formal concern of poetry. The book crackles from poem to poem. This creates a world

Running from July 19th to July 23rd San Diego comic con is without a doubt one of, if not, the biggest annual event for

that mixes myth with modern concern that remains consistently engaging. If you liked A Handmaid’s Tale and enjoy poetry this is a must read.

film and comic book lovers. Without fail every year there are always new films and new trailers revealed at this legendary convention. This year they released the trailer for the much anticipated Justice League movie. Yeah. That happened.

year lead on the DC cinematic universe many people will

APPLIANCE MAGIC BULLET

argue that DC is just playing a poorly planned game of catch

BRONWYN LAUNDRY

Of course, since the Marvel cinematic universe has a seven

up. While this might well be the case if the Justice League trailer is anything to go off then Marvel will certainly be given a run for its money.

Although the trailer doesn’t give too much away about the overall plot for the film it does introduce us to some

Briscoes were having a sale recently (shock of the century) and I thought I’d be a Capital A Adult and treat myself to the early birthday present of a Magic Bullet. Yes, a Magic Fucking Bullet, the stuff all your infomercial related wet dreams are made of.

of the better known characters from DC’s universe, most

I’d wanted one these bad boys since I first saw that cheesy infomercial back in 2006

notably The Flash. While The Flash (Ezra Miller) might not

or whenever it was, as a debit card-less 10 year old, just trying to occupy my school

be everyone’s favourite member of the Justice League, he

holidays with some mind numbing trash TV. I was more than a little excited when

is definitely the highlight of the trailer. The charisma and

I finally made the decision to get one. And let me tell you, it was a wise decision.

comedic relief that Miller brings to the character promises a more memorable performance than many would assume.

Alongside The Flash we are also introduced to Aquaman (Arthur Curry), Cyborg (Victor Stone) and, of course, the previously established characters from Dawn of Justice such as Ben Affleck’s Batman and Diana Prince’s Wonder Woman.

Only time will tell if DC is able to catch up with Marvel’s cinematic universe but if this trailer is anything to go by then I must say it’s looking pretty good for DC fans.

Firstly, Magic Bullet have upped their game since their infomercial days, you now get all kinds of cool stuff for one easy payment of $80 (!!!). You get all the blades and cups, but wait, there’s more! You also get a blender and juicer, which I will probably never use but it’s nice to know that at the tender age of 20 I own a juicer.

The system is easy to use, doesn’t take up much room in your tiny flat kitchen and cleans so easily, especially when you’re a lazy person like me. I make all kinds of soups, smoothies and sauces, but my personal favourite thing to make is frozen cocktails. Nothing impresses your friends more than an alcoholic smoothie served straight off the blender in a tacky plastic tumbler.

To be honest, I probably could live without it, but I really don’t want to.

13

COVERED BEN WHITEHOUSE Age: 21 Occupation: dishwasher/student What medium/s do you tend to work in and why?

Digital mainly because if I'm travelling or on the bus to somewhere and I see an outfit or something that I think looks interesting it's easy to just whip out the sketchbook app on my phone and quickly doodle it. Other than that I draw in my lectures a bunch (apologies to any of my lecturers reading this!).

What was your creative process for our cover image?

To be honest when I drew this originally I was really into the vaporwave/retro-futuristic aesthetic. It's slightly toned down in the end result because my style isn't as out there as vaporwave, but I tried to give off a somewhat vapour vibe.

Describe your style in 3 words.

Minimal, chill and stylised.

Where can people find you online? @bendouble.u on Instagram.

Fuck, marry, kill: Romeo & Juliet Leonardo DiCaprio, Wolf of Wall Street Leonardo DiCaprio or Leonardo da Vinci.

If I have to choose I'd go: F - Yung Leo M - Da Vinci K - Wall St Leo ezpz —

Arts NEXUS MAGAZINE

ARTS ‘CREATURES’ PETER DORNAUF

Currently running at the Waikato Museum (in the Barry

historical circles. It was first employed by the German

Hopkins Gallery) is an intriguing show called Creatures. It’s

surrealist, Max Ernst, and much later here in New Zealand by

been put together by the curator who has drawn on objects

painter Bill Hammond.

and art from the institution’s own collection. This is a clever little show that pulls together a diverse and eclectic mix of things which provides opportunity for fertile imaginative connections as it juxtaposes paintings, ceramics, sculptures and historic objects in instructive ways.

of

these

human/bird

creatures

carrying guns, while the other three were dressed in soldier’s uniforms, also carrying weapons. The title to the work provided a complete understanding of this ceramic tableau — “Toy Soldiers (von Tempsky) and the Hau Hau.”

aged wooden toy, a German plaything made in 1890, which

The work was by artist, Chuck Joseph, and displayed next

comprised a boat — specifically Noah’s Ark, together with

to the biblical toy, set off delicious intellectual sparks.

all the animals roughly hewn in folk art style, two by two.

The land wars of course were a product of the forces of

This would obviously be the only appropriate toy any good

colonialism which included the imposition of new gods onto

Victorian Lutheran child might be allowed to play with on the

the native population. The biblical Flood of course was an

Sabbath day. It’s a charming piece and speaks directly to our

act of violence perpetrated by a supreme divine power on

social history, our behavioural practices and belief. No toys

“misbehaving” humanity. Oh the ironies.

made. It’s a wonderful window into a particular time period.

RICHARD SWAINSON

examination

revealed three of them to be dressed in Māori cloaks and

The oldest piece in the exhibition would have to be an

depicting Darwin and Darwinian evolution of course were

AUTEUR HAROLD LLOYD

Closer

But not done with yet, the curator placed next to these two works, a cabinet containing the stuffed remains of extinct

Next to these wooden biblical constructions were displayed

NZ birds, in this case the Huia. Joseph’s bird/men had Huia-

a series of curious ceramic pieces that acted as a counter-

like heads, and so the theme of death at multiple levels and

ploy to Noah and his animals. These were toy-like creatures,

their ambivalent interactions with each other are played out

humans with the heads of birds, a trope well used in art

here, in what is just one tiny fraction of the show itself.

If you grew up in this country in the late 1970s or early

Lloyd's work might lack the sophistication or thematic

1980s Harold Lloyd was the public face of the silent era.

weight of his rivals but they have far more belly laughs.

Lloyd was the most popular of the big four silent clowns

The gags come thick and fast, put across by his legendary

in the 1920s, more prolific than either Charlie Chaplin or

comic timing and physical dexterity. Lloyd was known for

Buster Keaton and more obviously of his time. If Chaplin's

his "thrill" films — movies in which his character negotiates

sentimentality was grounded in his Victorian youth and

great heights or other dangers. The most famous of these,

Keaton's humour strayed into almost abstract and poetic

Safety Last, in which he climbs a New York skyscraper, played

areas, Lloyd was the archetypal 1920s go-getter, his

recently on closing night at the Auckland International Film

persona and plot lines a direct reflection of the Jazz Age

Festival. A sold out Civic Theatre marvelled at movie some

American Dream.

93 years old, enjoying a live music accompaniment supplied

Though he did not personally direct his films, Lloyd was also

by a symphony orchestra.

the most savvy businessman of the comics, producing and

Lloyd had a happier retirement than his contemporaries,

retaining the rights to his own material. Ever sensitive to

investing his profits wisely and becoming a fabulously wealthy

public taste, he retired twice: once in the late 1930s when

man. A backbone of the Hollywood social scene, noted

his box office fell away, and again after a much publicised

philanthropist and staunch member of the Republican Party,

comeback failed in 1947. However, in the early 1960s, buoyed

his prime hobby was photography. An early experimenter

by the revival of other repackaged silent shorts, Lloyd sensed

with 3-D technology, Lloyd travelled extensively, shooting

an opportunity to present his classics again on American

nude models against exotic locations. Unlike Chaplin, whose

television. Shortening and re-editing his best 1920s features,

predilection for pubescent girls provoked scandal, Lloyd

he was discovered by a whole new generation. It was these

never suffered from adverse publicity.

prints that played regularly on weekday afternoons in New Zealand a decade or so later.

Auteur House stocks a Harold Lloyd boxset containing all of the filmmaker's 1920s work and most of his early talkies.

15

Feature NEXUS MAGAZINE

FEATURE PLAGIARISM: THE ULTIMATE STUDENT CRIME ONYX LILY

MyMaster service, there are hundreds of similar sites around. Some have a legitimate purpose but are also used by students wanting to buy assignments, while others are clearly there solely for that purpose, offering “competitive pricing” and “guaranteed plagiarism-free” work (ironic, given that plagiarism means “presenting someone else’s work as your own”).

New Zealand universities are similarly concerned about online assignment buying, and there is ongoing research into ways to set assessment items to reduce the likelihood that a student will be able to cheat — putting the fence at the top of the cliff rather than an ambulance at the bottom, so to speak.

If paying someone else to do your assignment for you sounds appealing, think

Academic freedom is one of the cornerstones of university life and has

again. Where a student is found to have purchased an assignment, the University

been for hundreds of years. Section 131 of NZ’s Education Act even states

takes it very seriously, and it is likely to result in your enrolment being cancelled.

that university academics must be free to tell Jonkey that he’s a fucking

In other words — you could be expelled. Goodbye degree, hello minimum wage

muppet (I’m paraphrasing). But as Eleanor Roosevelt said, “with freedom

— and you’ll still have your student loan to pay back.

comes responsibility,” and in order to keep and deserve academic freedom, academics must ensure they uphold the highest levels of academic integrity.

CONSEQUENCES (NAUGHTY, NAUGHTY)

For undergraduate students, this mostly translates into swearing at the APA

With advances in technology, cheating has become more accessible and more

referencing guide at three the morning an assignment’s due and howling, “Why

sophisticated, but so are the methods of detection. Most of you will have heard of

does it matter if this bloody comma is in the right place — you know what I

Turnitin, which the University uses to check assignments for plagiarism. Turnitin

mean!”

is like a massive database combined with a search engine — it stores every

The problem is that as education has become more of a commodity, and (some) students are concerned primarily with the earning power of their piece of paper at the end of their degree, rather than the learning itself, taking shortcuts becomes easier for students to justify to themselves. And by taking shortcuts, I mean down and dirty cheating.

assignment ever submitted to it, and also combs internet sources, and when you submit an assignment to it, it compares your assignment to everything else and spits out a report showing how much matches to other sources. It can even get in behind paid membership walls of a number of assignment-buying sites. If you have large unreferenced chunks, or too much of an exact match to another source, you’ll be sent to the Student Discipline Committee to explain yourself.

WHAT IS CHEATING?

While the Student Discipline Committee may sound exciting to the kinky

Universities talk about academic misconduct, which covers a multitude of sins.

among you, it’s less Christian Grey’s Red Room and more a very serious version

These include plagiarism, which can be unintentional (you forgot to go to that

of getting sent to the principal’s office. And the consequences if you’re found

library seminar on referencing) or intentional (you copy-and-pasted large chunks

guilty will cost you time (e.g. redoing assignments) and/or money (e.g. redoing

of text from Wikipedia, or you stole your flatmate’s assignment from last year

papers), as well as your reputation.

and handed it in as your own). It also includes cheating, which might refer to tattooing cheat notes onto your arm before an exam, copying off the person next to you in a test, or sending your identical twin in to take an exam for you.

If you find yourself struggling with a paper or an assignment and you’re tempted to turn to cheating as a way out, I have three words for you. Don’t. Do. It. The Uni has so many other ways you can get help, there’s no excuse. You can talk to your

But one of the biggest scourges of academic integrity facing universities at

lecturer or tutor for help or an extension, get assistance from Student Learning

present is where students purchase assignments online.

or the Library with academic skills, talk to a student mentor in your faculty, or go and see the WSU for all kinds of support. And when it really comes down to

ASSIGNMENT BUYING

it, you’re much better to hand in something crap or late than hand in something

In 2014, an essay writing company called MyMaster was uncovered by Australian

that you didn’t write.

media. The woman behind the operation, Yingying Dou, was found to have distributed flyers to a number of Australian universities, in places students were likely to see them, offering paid assignment-writing services. MyMaster even had a differential pricing scheme, depending on what grade the student wanted to achieve for the assignment. MyMaster turned over $AU160,000 in 2014, pointing to the desperation many students clearly feel to succeed in their studies.

University is all about becoming a creative and critical independent thinker, and a useful citizen of the world (it is, trust me). Any kind of academic misconduct undermines the whole reason you are (or should be) here, and having a piece of paper at the end will be worthless if you can’t actually do what it says you should be able to do. And you can quote me on that.

While MyMaster was shut down in 2015, and more than 70 students were

More information on Waikato’s academic integrity and student discipline

expelled, suspended or faced other severe penalties as a result of using the

processes is available at http://www.waikato.ac.nz/sasd/misconduct/ 17

NEXUS MAGAZINE Feature

FEATURE “CRIMINAL WHITE POWER GANGSTER TO CHRISTIAN MĀORI PSYCHOLOGIST” INTERVIEW BY BRITTANY ROSE

Tony Lorigan used to be what that fuddy duddy on Police Ten 7 would refer to

In a bike gang you can’t use intravenous drugs — you’ll have your patch stripped

as a “thug”. Now he is a Masters student interested in community psychology

and be smashed over, for example.The higher up guys don’t condone smoking

and the gender/power dynamics within New Zealand’s gangs. He studies here

crack, they don’t want our members fried. No ethical issues with selling it to the

at University of Waikato, so Brittany sat down with him to talk about growing

public and making money of them fried and wrecking their lives, but ya’ know we

up surrounded by knives on the stove and White Power tee shirts.

don’t want our team wrecked.

Tell us a bit about your childhood and the exposure to crime and gangs during your upbringing.

I was raised in the gang, that’s all I knew. I was hiding handguns in the single digits.

It was normal to me. You’d get up and put the knives on and have spots. That would come before anything, a normal person would have Weetbix, or a coffee or smoke or whatever. We had a spot. Bashing people was normal, swearing was normal. I’d always wear a White Power shirt. We were treated like rockstars of muscle — imagine doing whatever you wanted, however you wanted, where ever you wanted. That’s what we did.

I’m a convicted meth dealer. It’s the most evil drug I’ve ever come across, it will wreck your life. I look back on my life, and in the past when I got caught people would ask, “Are you sorry that you did it, or are you sorry that you got caught?” and I’d always lie. Of course I wasn’t sorry that I did it. That’s what they wanted to hear. Honestly today, I really am sorry I did what I did, and I’m glad I got caught.

If I hadn’t have got caught, I wouldn’t have changed to what I am today. These days I’m a student ambassador, I’m a masters student, I’m a father, I’m active in my church, active in my community. I lead a really good life.

How did you transition away from crime? Family support?

If someone called me bro in my teenage years, that was enough for me to bash

Nah, my family’s crap, I’ve had a lot of support at University from the WSU, and

them — “Don’t imply that I’m like you, you black bastard.” I just didn’t understand

subject librarians, student learning. It cracks me up, for my first few years, I pretty

that “bro” was like “hi,” or “mate,” or “kia ora,” or “hello”. It wasn’t until I went to jail

much had a young Māori, and an older woman mentor me. When I was younger,

that I was forced to deal with different cultures and different ethnicities — some of

the idea of having a Māori or a woman mentor me would’ve been, “Ha, what sort

them backed me up, some of them helped me out, I was like, “Shit, they’re alright.”

of joke is that? What do women know? What do Māoris know?” It just tickles me.

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Feature NEXUS MAGAZINE

How does your history impact on your academic life and study?

member, have your status within the women crowd — because there’s a pecking

A lot of my research focuses around gangs, and masculinity and identity —

order, but a women can’t become a member, not in this country. You will never

power and status and the dynamics of it. Misogynistic ideas and treating women

be an equal. Gang comes first.

poorly — in the gang world women are treated as a resource, as a convenience.

One of my jobs used to be a driver for the strippers and the prostitutes and it was my job to drive them to their job, they’d do their strip or whatever, and I’d take them home.

It was one of the major reasons I left the gang world becomes gang comes before everything. Before religion, family, anything.

What are your thoughts on the justice system in New Zealand? If not from

I’m a staunch supporter of the White Ribbon Campaign, I hate women being hit.

personal experience, from an academic perspective.

I fight in a heavyweight kickboxing division, I do karate now. But I hate it with a

It’s shit. It doesn’t work. We’ve got one of the most heavily populated prison

passion, mate. I grew up watching it. It’s not fair. I don’t need to overpower you

systems in the first world. There’s no rehabilitation like you read about in the

*nods to Brittany* to know I’m gonna win, look at the size of us. It really upsets

news, we’re just locked up. I can understand and appreciate now that it’s a

me. Y’know, I can knock out men that are my size, but I don’t need to fight on

resource problem, that we don’t have the resources for it.

the streets.

I supervise “at risk” youth who are doing community service, they’re on the cusp

My PHD will go from Criminal White Power Gangster to Christian Māori

of going to jail. I can handle them, I’m not scared of them and I supervise them for

Psychologist, and how’d you do that, why’d you do that, what’s evolved, the

the local cop. But what pisses me off is when they’re finished their 200, 100, 400

highs and lows… Some of the Māori here embrace me, some of them find me

hours whatever, they’re fixed! They’ve done their time, they’re fixed, they don’t

quite offensive.

need anymore attention! Bullshit. This is when they need support. But when the supervision drops off at the end of the community service they’re “fixed.”

Fair enough.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I do understand that. Don’t get me wrong, I’m polite and respectful and know the kaupapa, and I even speak quite a bit of te reo these days. But just the nature of my tattoos and the background — you know like, I used to have a visible swastika, but I got it covered over. Because I’d talk to people at the University and they’d say. “Look, Tony, man. You’re smart and we love the story, but we can’t back up a swastika.” Because I speak publicly a lot, “we can’t have you walking around with a swastika on your ankle." So eventually, into my second year I had it removed. The doors just opened. This institution can’t be seen to be supporting [swastika connotations], and I understand that, it is offensive to a lot of people. The majority of people. And that’s why the gangs use it — it invokes fear. For the predominantly White Power gangs, we think we’re the best, as far as gangs go.

The premise of White Power is, by definition, racist. Earlier you spoke about

"IMAGINE DOING WHATEVER YOU WANTED, HOWEVER YOU WANTED, WHERE EVER YOU WANTED. THAT’S WHAT WE DID."

misogyny in gangs — are there sexist behaviours in gangs that parallel with other parts of society?

Say we were out on the town, having beers and at midnight we decide “k, I’m hungry, I want a Big Mac,” and you want a Quarter Pounder. We know what we

What about Family Group Conferences?

want in our head and we wanna satisfy that appetite. We would treat women

They’re shit! I’m 38 now, I came up when Family Groups Conferences came in —

the same, I want one with big tits, you want blonde, short, you go and pick one

like “I know what you wanna hear.” If you’re in a position of power and I’m in the

out. Women are used as a resource to satisfy a sexual desire and they are of no

shit, I will tick that box and say what you wanna hear because you mean nothing

use for anything other than that — well maybe cooking and cleaning the house.

to me. It doesn’t matter how much love and care is put into these kids, when you

But here [at university] fists aren’t used, words are, and women can go toe-totoe. It was in my twenties that I realised women were smart — it wasn’t any great revelation, really. *Scoffs* But it was then, trust me. I wasn’t taught to believe that, and coming here, the amount of very, very intelligent women that I have met has made me realise that.

I believe, personally, that men are externally, physically stronger, but women are internally and mentally stronger. That’s what I believe. Women here are treated on a par, you can always have the argument that women are paid less, blah,

send them back to an environment where they’re being molested and smashed over and cold and hungry and cold and scared. It’s undone in a second.

Do you still have friendships with people you knew through gangs?

Absolutely, I’ll always be connected to that world. I treat them the same. The people I haven’t seen for years have noticed the profound effect this place [uni] has made. I choose not to behave that way or smoke crack with them, but they’re still humans, they’re still people with feelings and emotions. They might be misunderstood, or they might be terrible wankers. Whatever, they’re still people that deserve help and love and respect.

blah, blah, women are oppressed… but basically, here if you’re in an academic

Just like when I went to jail — having to deal with people outside of my inner

situation, women or male, you’ll go forward.

circle or my comfort zone, I do the same for them. You can’t say there’s no hope

In gangs, young boys are put on the same level as prospects and women. But

for change because I’ve done it. Hopefully it’s inspiring or motivating.

young boys have the chance to grow into a man and rise up, rise through the

At the end of the day, just because someone’s a member of a gang or associates

ranks. Women don’t get that. You might go up a step or two if you marry a

in the underworld doesn’t actually make them a bad person.

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Feature NEXUS MAGAZINE

FEATURE HATE CRIMES: FEAR & LOATHING IN 2016 JARED WOOLDRIDGE

There’s been some really unsettling stuff happening in the world — a

from slavery, were trying to exercise their right to vote. Federal law enforcement

massacre in a nightclub, the stabbing of MP Joe Cox in street, and single-

eventually managed to break the Klan, at least until 1900s began. And then there

minded rhetoric from political figures the world over. With this much hate

were the first modern hate crime laws, the Civil Rights Act of 1968 which allowed

and fear floating around, Jared Wooldridge attempts to answer the question

for federal prosecution of anyone who, through criminal activity, sought to attack

“What the fuck is going on here?”

or prevent the exercise of their freedoms.

Many nations have hate crime laws, including New Zealand. The biggest factor in determining what separates hate crimes from others of a like nature is the motivation behind it; if the offence is motivated by prejudice toward the victim, toward any part of their identity, whether it's their race, ethnicity, nationality, religion, language, gender, disability, sexual orientation, etc. If the crime is motivated in this way then it is classed as a hate crime. Treating these crimes separately is based on the idea that those motivated by prejudice towards an aspect of a person's/group’s identity causes a greater amount of harm toward this person or group's, and it’s not exactly hard to see why that would be the case.

There is no question hate crimes exist, or are a problem. Just recently, the world had a terrible lesson in how dangerous hate still is. The Orlando nightclub massacre, on June 12, where Omar Mateen killed 49 people and wounded another 53, at Pulse, a popular gay nightclub. As well as being the deadliest terrorist incident in the United States since 9/11, it was also the deadliest and most violent incident against LGBTQA people in the history of the United States. While it may have been the largest case of a singular act of violence and hatred, the LGBTQA community has had to suffer at the hands of hate crimes for too long now, all over the world, which is hardly a surprise when extreme groups like the Westboro Baptist church also exist.

Some argue that was all well and good back in the day, but these laws shouldn’t be on the books anymore. But really these problems are still relevant and frequent today in nations with these laws, and these types of crimes. All they’re about is trying to ensure that everyone, even those groups in society that have to fight for their right to be seen as equal, are guaranteed their right. Look at all the groups today that have to fight the established order, who are rejected by others in society, who are looked upon fearfully by those who might be a little ignorant.

The fact that hate crimes are seeing an upswing in parts of the globe as well, especially European nations and the United States, does show how the laws are still valuable. There are still groups, believe it or not, being hated on.

Why is this happening? Why the surge now? I don’t believe I can answer and solve the problem, but maybe I can at least shed some light. All around the world, in Europe, the Americas, Asia, Africa, etc, we can see, at the moment, a rise in nationalistic thinking, and tough, “straight”-talking hardliners who can go a long way by stoking up fears. I’m talking those who stoked up fears of immigrants in the United Kingdom before and after the Brexit, with flaming rhetoric about how they’re pouring into the nation and destroying the culture of those who live in it.

I’m talking Trump, rallying against entire religions and nationalities, threatening to ban them or wall them out. I’m talking the fear gripping many leaders in Europe, who manage to stir up popular feelings of fear towards refugees and Islam. Fear

For other recent examples, look at a post-Brexit England. In a nation that was

is the easiest feeling to spread, all it takes is one impassioned speech about

bitterly divided over whether or not to stay in the EU (and one that didn’t seem

protecting the innocent children from the murderous hordes, or the immoral

to actually fully comprehend what they were doing), they have seen a dramatic

deviants, and then all of a sudden some people don’t feel safe. They don’t want

rise in the number of reported hate crimes. In areas that voted heavily to leave

murderers or deviants living amongst them, no!

the hate crimes and racial abuse are occurring in greater numbers than they were before, with signs like the “No more Polish vermin” becoming more common.

Then there was another case, unrelated to the Brexit, of a woman who helped list gender as one of the motivations for a hate crime, and has since come under attack and been threatened, with one person threatening to put a machete through her head.

Now I could continue to list examples outside of these, as these were just the first articles I found, but let's not forget how the first hate crime laws came about. After the American Civil War; a number of Acts were passed by congress to combat the Ku Klux Klan, who were attacking black people who, just freed

You will always have people more than willing to exploit fear for their own purposes. They will always find an audience in the fearful, in those who have not educated themselves, or are naive about the customs or lifestyles of others.

"They’re" different, and if someone tells you that "they’re" dangerous, then it’s not too great a leap from fear to hate. Hate isn’t the most rational of emotions, and it’s not the most peaceful of emotions.

This by no means covered all the bases here, if anything I’ve only scratched the surface of one aspect of an extraordinarily multi-faceted issue. All it is, I suppose, in the end, is my attempt to try and find some sense to the hate.

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NEXUS MAGAZINE Your Space

YOUR SPACE THE OAKS I’m not sure why it is so easy to tell that exclusively student aged males live in this flat. Maybe it’s the various sex-related attempts at decor, or perhaps the blatant disregard for any type of order or Feng Shui.

Between the layer of dust and the dirty washing in cardboard boxes, one gets the distinct desire to take a shower after leaving this flat.

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Your Space NEXUS MAGAZINE

23

WAITING FOR A BUS OR A REPLY TO YOUR TEXT? PLEASE SIGNAL THE DRIVER!

JASE & PJ

WEEKDAYS 3 -7PM ZMONLINE.COM

NEXUS MAGAZINE Columns

THAT TIME I...

BUSTED TOO MANY NUTS

MODERN DAY MIXTAPE TINY LITTLE HOUSES

HYMEN HEAVER HENRY

LYAM BUCHANAN

MAN, 22, STRAIGHT

I think it’s time to embrace it, Australians are definitely ahead of the game.

Last period in High School was a joke, in hindsight I probably shouldn’t have

Their hipster culture isn’t just a rip of what's trending on Tumblr, their bugs

bunked as much class as I did but you only get one chance in life to slam back

and wildlife are really passionate about the global population crisis and their

girls younger than eighteen, at least without moral backlash. Sadly my house

musicians are creating everything we can only dream of. Tiny Little Houses

was too far away and her Dad was a teacher so we needed a schedule in order

are the perfect example of Australians being the superior species, luckily I was

to bust as many nuts as possible.

able to squeeze myself into their lives for a brief moment and find out what

Monday: Fuck between 11am and 12.30pm, get back in time for Biology,

makes their tunes as dreamy as they are.

Tuesday: Ditch class at 2.30pm and bust as many nuts as possible before 3pm,

If you’re yet to be enlightened by the noise-folk/lo-fi goodness of Tiny Little

Wednesday: Rest day, hold hands, talk about our feelings,

Houses I’d highly recommend scampering out of your musty hovel. You need

Thursday: Head on home at 1pm, get head in the spa and fuck on various

to be cleansed, allow your soul to be taken on the emotional journey known

surfaces till 4pm,

as their 2015 album, You Tore Out My Heart. With new tracks on the way it’s

Friday: Take it easy and binge watch her favorite movies, cheeky fondle

the perfect time to broaden your tastes and bow down to our Australian

under the covers.

overlords. Sadly I won’t be able to fit the entire interview into this column but

Occasionally this would backfire. There is nothing more exhilarating than being in the shower while buried deep in an eosophagus to then hear the garage door open. The adrenaline surges through every inch of your overly moistened body

be sure to check out our full coverage on the Nexus Magazine Facebook page.

TINY LITTLE HOUSES

as you both sprint back to her bedroom. There is nothing worse than trying to

What are some of the main factors which help you create your own take

explain to the father of a sixteen year old girl why you’re using his wife's Kindle

on the 90s lo-fi sound? When I started TLH back in around 2011 there just

to hide your erection, as you sit soaking wet and barely clothed with his ‘oh

wasn’t many bands I could find making the music I was listening to. I think

so pure’ daughter. While in the midst of eye contact you wouldn’t expect your

there’s been a revival on that lo-fi pop sound in the last couple of years but I

cock to be harder than the machete your tires are about to get slashed with,

still have some things I want to say. I always liked that the 90s blended fuzz

though it was only in this moment I realised she had her father's eyes.

with acoustic instruments and really hones the quiet-loud dynamic so well.

Looking back it actually seems moderately worrying. We would house-sit for someone's family friend then spend the majority of the time fucking on their couches and coffee tables, leaving the curtains open to antagonise the neighbours. We’d be at a pool party with all of our mates and children present but she’d still give me an aqua tug. Not even the movie theatre was safe, anyone who wasn’t paying full attention to the screen would be graced with the soft squelch of fresh mac and cheese as she got the finger papse of a lifetime.

Should I hand myself into the Police? I swear it must be illegal to bust a nut within a 100 metre radius of children. I guess it’s probably a better decision to stay anonymous.

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The artists of that generation really speak to me and it’s something I wanted to channel as much as I could.

Who/what fuels the sadness throughout your tracks? Honestly, I don’t think I’m a particularly sad person. I don’t make music for fun and I can't write unless it's because I need to get something off my mind. I think express myself better in lyrics then how I do face to face which is both a blessing and a curse. There’s also so much sadness in this world, it's hard not to pick up on it, you don’t need to be experiencing it to know that it's there.

Columns NEXUS MAGAZINE

THE I.T. GUY TEDXRUAKURA II

JUST THE TIP VISIT FRANCE

MATTHEW RAE

NINA FOX

I’ve wanted to attend a TED event ever since I saw Boaz Almog levitate a

Though Hamilton is a thriving metropolis with enough student bars to keep ol’

superconductor over a magnetised track back in 2012. This year my dream

Lawrenson comfortable for the rest of his life, it just isn’t quite postcard worthy.

finally came true, and I got to sit in the front row. I guess showing up late

This is why I encourage all Waikat kids to venture past The Base at some point

sometimes has its perks, even though I had to leave my coffee at the door.

and see some of what this Earth has to offer you. There will be absolutely no judgement from me when you Gram spam your account with a new exotic

BEN BELL Nothing makes a person feel old like a 17(!) year old presenter who points out how left behind we are when it comes to social media. That's just what Ben Bell did, I’m only 21 and was left patting my head and rubbing my belly as a “Social media toddler.”

destination each day, I know I was more than guilty of that in my travels.

As I mostly got amongst Europe, I can only provide suggestions for this part of the globe. I’m deeply sorry that I can’t provide you with some of my overflowing wisdom about places in Asia or elsewhere, but just grab a Lonely Planet book and you’ll be right. As I spent most of my time in France, I thought

Bell’s talk challenges the way that some (read: the older generation) look

it was time that I became that annoying fucker who always references ‘that

at social media. Social media is constantly evolving, it’s easier to detect and

time I went to Paris.’

avoid the creeps and bullies online so we talk to the people we actually want to. After all, social media is about being social on media.

KELLY ANN MCKERCHER If you thought a designer was someone who wore thick-rimmed glasses, multi-colored tops, and pants that cling to everything but the kitchen sink,

As soon as you set foot in France, you are confronted with their strong culture and boy, are they stubborn about it. You are quite right to assume that they all smoke, drink red wine and carry baguettes around, because quite often they do. I can’t lie and say I’m not impartial to a cheeky durry on the piss, but this lot can be found hooning cigarettes before class at 8.30 am.

Kelly Ann McKercher would like to disagree. Truth is, my thoughts weren't far

I was mainly based in Bordeaux while in France, a city that was voted the top

off that. Designers aren't just poster makers, website builders or fashion gurus;

European destination in 2015, and for good reason. It is a beautifully historic city,

they are also people who turn ideas into actions in the most effective way.

surrounded by some of the most important vineyards in the world. It’s one of

Telling the story of how a small pop-up space built by the youth of Kaitaia was far more popular and community building than the beautiful community

those unique places that has everything going for it, but is yet to be recognised as a tourist must-do. Some would say it’s like Paris, but without the lines.

centre that was built (which continues to remain empty). In talking about

Some people tell me that they think Paris is a let down, and that it’s much

the sense of community McKercher said, “Something doesn’t feel right

dirtier than they expected, to which I always reply: “have you been to

about the fact that our lives, as designers and decision makers, are full of

Auckland?” Of course Paris has quite the name for itself and has many an

decisions about how others get to live theirs.” The pop-up space broke down

expectation to live up to, but for me it completely did. It instantly lived up to its

the barriers between the youth of Kaitaia and the adults and it’s all because

name as the ‘City of Love,’ even though I was probably the most single person

this space was built and designed by the people for the people. With this,

in the whole of Paris. It just had a beautiful, romantic vibe that I don’t think

McKercher urged us to remember that we can all make a difference through

you’d ever experience walking along Victoria or Hood Street.

design, we just have to listen.

So if you get the chance, visit France (rhyme intended).

I had an absolute blast, meeting so many inspirational people and learning a few new things I can apply to my own life. For those of you who were unlucky enough not to get a ticket, don't fret as all the talks were filmed and will be available later on this month.

27

NEXUS MAGAZINE Columns

HARI KORERO LIFE AS A WHITE MĀORI AT UOW

YWRC TOXIC WORKPLACE

ANONYMOUS

MEL MARTIN

In the current day and age there are more mixed-racial relationships than

A recent article on www.nzdoctor.co.nz by Wellington GP Emma Dunning,

ever before. This happens to be the case for my mother and father. Both my

has emphasised the increasing number of people in New Zealand whose jobs

brother and I are pale due to having an English mother, though we have a

are making them ill. Dunning’s experience with students, ex-students, and

large percentage of Māori blood on our father’s side.

graduates observes that many of them are coming to her with higher rates

I have always indicated I am of Māori decent on all university forms and for such, I receive invitations to all of the Kai Tahi (eating as one) cultural hour

of work-related stress. She also sees many a patient suffering from insomnia, depression and anxiety.

lunches and other various activities for Māori students. As persuasive as a free

This year in my capacity as Educator-Coordinator for the YWRC, I have been

meal sounds to a student, for my first two years at Waikato I let the fear of

privy to more cases than usual of young people particularly who have been

sticking out stop me from attending. It was not until a few months ago that I

given medical leave from work for similar reasons. In the past month I have

started getting involved in these activities and all that the Roopu on campus

met three young women experiencing differing severities of either toxic

have to offer. These services are there to help all Māori and are designed to

workplace culture, or workplace bullying that has taken a toll on their mental

cater for aspect of one’s being — socially, academically and emotionally. They

health, leading them to take medical time off work as reprieve from their

are like a whānau away from home.

situations. By the time they come to me, young people are at their wits end.

The point I am getting at is that being Māori doesn’t come down to skin colour

They’ve already put up with the intolerable behaviour for a while; they’ve

nor the shape of your nose, in fact I don’t think it even comes down to genetics

taken sick leave of some description, and they’re usually due back at work in a

— it’s all about the values you hold.

few days and want my support in heading back just in case nothing has been

If you are in the same position I was, then I would wholeheartedly recommend taking a deep breath and finding the strength to get over your fears, because on the other side of fear is a whole support system there to help you through your studies and some mean feeds as well.

The Māori clubs on campus are: Te Ranga Ngaku – Māori Management Student’s Association, Te Whakahiapo – Māori Law Student's Association, Te Waiora

resolved — in most cases this is true. Usually taking time off doesn’t fix the situation, but simply prolongs the process of dealing with it; and taking sick leave can be counterproductive.

Having now witnessed a few people go through the legal process, getting support and taking mediation action can be counterproductive too, so what then is there to be done?

– Māori Student’s Association, and the newly created Tūmata Kōkiri – Māori

I get that the job market is tough, and so young people are reluctant to leave

Education Student’s Association. All of which can be found on Facebook.

their jobs willy nilly; we’re also a demographic of fighting for our rights and the respect we work hard for, so I get that too. Is this something our generation of workers can just expect to put up with until we find a workplace culture we fit into? Or is there a bigger issue in need of highlighting?

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Cooking for Students NEXUS MAGAZINE

PAK ’N SAVE HEAD CHEF SPINACH & CHICKEN PIZZA INGREDIENTS 1x Turkish, pre-sauced thin bases Leftover shredded rotisserie chicken Grated cheese of your choice Grated mozzarella Half a small onion Shredded spinach leaves Moroccan seasoning Serves 2 DIRECTIONS 1. Preheat oven to 180 on bake 2. Place base on airing rack on tray — heat in oven to ensure crispiness 3. Dice onion, shred spinach and chicken 4. Grate cheeses 5. Remove base from oven and add ingredients in the following order: 6. Onion, mozzarella, chicken, moroccan seasoning, spinach, cheese.

7. Place in oven and cook until cheese is suitably melted — approx. 7 minutes 8. Turn heat up and flick to grill cheese if you wish.

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Snap nexusmag your shenanigans! The best snap each week wins a voucher from our mates at BurgerFuel. Claim it from the Nexus office in SUB.

WINNER

She enjoys being fit, but reckons you can’t really tell, and he reckons he’s pretty keen on the gym, but at the same time is a “lazy piece of shit”. He’s not too picky about girls as long as they’re not cunts (though I assume he wants them to have cunts? Is that transphobic?), and her stringent criteria included the possibly racist term “half-cast.”

HE SAID

SHE SAID

So I rock up at about 5 past 7, fashionably late as usual thanks

So I showed up to House just past 7pm after my flatties basically

to what seemed like every red light in Hamilton. I get seated at

kicked me out of the car and was the first one to arrive. After the

an empty table, 5 minutes go by and still no one. As I think to

bartender had no idea what the Nexus Blind Date was and being

myself “I know it’s a blind date but there’s meant to be another

confused for the girl on a job trial, it was 7.15pm and there was still

person sitting across from me right?”. Eventually the hostess come

no sign of my date. Obviously I was starting to worry and believe

back and it turns out we’ve been seated at opposite ends of the

me, there is only so many times you can check your phone and read

restaurant at separate tables just for a giggle. So I get escorted to

through the menus.

the correct table and all is well.

Turned out that he had been there just as long as I had but was

We order a couple drinks and get to talking about random shit,

sitting on the opposite side of the restaurant. Finally, we were at

learned she’s studying to be a teacher, considerably more

the same table and started getting to know each other. He was in

interesting than my run of the mill management degree. We talked

his last year, I was in my second and although the age gap wasn’t

for about two and a half hours and I wasn’t getting any “take me

massive it seemed like we were at different stages of the uni cycle.

home and do dirty things to me” vibes.

It didn’t take us long to choose our meals and he suggested to

At this point I was contemplating suing Lynx for false advertising

share mains which was ideal. We had a really nice dinner and he

as she wasn’t flying at me uncontrollably. So I gave her a ride home

was super lovely. After finishing off our cocktails he kindly dropped

in my 1991 Holden Barina, which is arguably more enjoyable than

me home to my eagerly waiting flat mates. Big ups to Nexus for a

a ride on me.

fun experience!

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was not a good idea. But just in case, “not a good idea”.

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CAPRICORN (DECEMBER 22 — JANUARY 19) Sign of the goat, you’re romantic and sensitive, often with strong intuition. Beware however, as this is often a

tinfoil hat: keeps in body heat, and provides A+ illuminati protection.

PISCES (FEBRUARY 19 — MARCH 20)

who throws boomerangs has some real issues letting go.”

ARIES (MARCH 21 — APRIL 19) The stars shine bright this week, and we’re gonna hit you with some nostalgia: fruit roll ups, troll dolls, heelies, and 50c mixes at the dairy.

TAURUS (APRIL 20 — MAY 20) So you put your course related costs down at the TAB on a

the Attic, Lolita, and Perfume all in one week? They got way too excited by our erotica competition, clearly.

Greasy

Falsifying

Shank

Fraud

Lockpick

Referencing

Rothmans

Charlotte

Plagiarism

Blackmarket

Dabbing

Saturday Exams

to move backwards’. Better to move backwards, than the

Discipline

Hoodlums

Tinder

Cheating

Paul Walker brand of too fast forwards.

Fruit

Narcotics

Shoplifting

Harambe

Cunts

Pickpocket

Identity

Monopoly

Science

Christian Rap

Creamy

Biochemistry

Unironic

Laundry

Doobies

Hoodie Thiefs

CANCER (JUNE 21 — JULY 22) Mercury is no longer in retrograde which means ‘appearing

LEO (JULY 23 — AUGUST 22) Leos love a good mystery, you inquisitive cats. But good luck solving that one about where all the toilet paper in your flat goes, because tbh you don’t want to know the answer...

VIRGO (AUGUST 23 — SEPTEMBER 22) You are extremely determined, but you really should put that controller down because clocking CoD or FIFA isn’t going to get you your degree.

LIBRA (SEPTEMBER 23 — OCTOBER 22) They say you are what you eat, but no amount of hash will turn you into a marijuana bush. It may however influence your poor decision to think that weed branded clothing is cool.

SCORPIO (OCTOBER 23 — NOVEMBER 21) The earth is in its southern hemispheric tilt away from the sun, which is just a fancy way of saying it’s winter, and it’s going to be bloody cold for at least two more months.

SAGITTARIUS (NOVEMBER 22 — DECEMBER 21) Pro-tip of the week: if your mystery internet boyfriend asks you for a Western Union money transfer, he’s not real.

32

N.16 / V.48

CRIME

SIMPLE PUZZLES 4 SIMPLE PEOPLE

Puzzles NEXUS MAGAZINE

SUDOKU 7

8

5

4 6

1

8

7

3

9

3

6

7 9

5

5

4

2

2 3

4 9

8

6

2

5

1

5

7

8 3

2

4

4

3

1

9

6 5

4 1

3

4

3

9

8 3

2

1

2

5

5

1

8

9

4

2

6

2

8

9

4

7

8 2

1

7

5 4

8

4

9

MEDIUM

TRIVIAL

9

2

2 3

5

7 8

4

7

2

EASY

9

2 6

8

1

8

4

5

9

8

1

1

HARD

CODE CRACKER

a) Which artist had a 'Blue Period' and a 'Rose Period'? b) What is the study of disease called?

9 9

17

19 6

24

4

12

13

13

1

23

8

25

13

9

16

22

10

8

9

13

12

1

26

13 25

2

18 24

12

5

c) What was the largest sea battle of World War I called?

6

d) E = mc2. 'c' represents what? e) What is a Hydrodaktulopsychicharmonica?

21

13

16 23

24

5

WORD TWIST

E

O

X

T

16

1

5

9

6

13

9

12

18

6

9

13 5

8

horizontally, vertically or 18

diagonally and cannot be used more than once in a word.

5

17

15

6

10

15 7

26

18

25

16 12

13

13 4

8

14

1

O

14

10

18

22

2

3

15

16

T

8

16

9

8

17

9

16

12

18

1

26

23

13

1

6

25

13

9

12 9

6

9

1 13

25

18

23 21

16 13

3

13

8

13 18

21 11

9

26

9

17 7

9

10

26

8

4

5

6

7

8

9

10

11

12

13

17

18

19

20

21

22

23

24

25

26

ANSWERS

Code Cracker

S

1

23

1.O 2.J 3.Z 4.D 5.P 6.C

K

17

22

Trivial

S

18

12

7.K 8.R 9.E 10.H 11.W 12.M

A

The letters must touch

17

26

a) Pablo Picasso

C

9

9

13.A 14.X 15.Y 16.T 17.S

I

4

24

b) Pathology

H

9

make from these letters?

23

20

18.I 19.F 20.Q 21.V 22.B

Y

18

8

c) The Battle of Jutland (or Skagerrak)

E

18

1

23.L 24.U 25.G 26.N

N

11

23

d) The speed of light

Q

9

8

22

12

e) Glass harmonica, bowl organ, armonica

V

22

How many words can you

13

13

33

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35

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