ODE, TO SOULMATE PETS

If souls are neither masculine nor feminine then I suppose that they are neither bound to solely existing within human form but also exist within animals, plants, and all reverent life. Ancient Egyptians knew this well–they revered all forms of life. They mummified animals including hawks, snakes, crocodiles, dogs, and of course, their most celebrated feline companions, honoring cats just as they did with their deceased kings and queens. I can relate to this school of thought.

When I said goodbye to my fur baby, Jay, this past winter, my heart grieved in the same way I would have with any other cherished soulmate. Comfortably, he laid inside my arms, snuggled inside of his favorite blankie with a tiny needle poking from his fluffy gray coat, awaiting his final moments before euthanasia. I whispered into his kitty ears, “When you see the light, I hope you go into it, but if you’re not ready, then you can stay with mommy as my guardian angel until it’s my turn to join you.”

I don’t know if that was selfish of me to say. But the truth is, if the initial shock of detaching from his earthbound body gave him too much fear of the unknown, then I didn’t want him wandering off into limbo – or purgatory. Who was I to confirm where his spirit would go once his tiny little heart stopped beating?

Obsessively, I began researching spirit animals all over the internet to find answers to where my cat may have gone, how he might be feeling (if he still feels emotions), if he’s in a safe place or lost in darkness?