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One In 10 HOrnets graduate In fOur? 8 new dOwntOwn needs ... mOre BIllBOards! 13 JOey garcIa’s scHOOl Of lOve 45

Our writer watched every single Bond flick. In order. Here’s what he learned. PAGE 16 Sacramento’S newS & entertainment weekly

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Volume 27, iSSue 29

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Amavanthe Public Image Limited (PiL) David Allen Coe Iamsu! Holiday Fan Jam Feat. Maddie & Tae Reverend Horton Heat The Maine World of Hard Rock Tour Joe Nichols Falling In Reverse/Atreyu Dance Gavin Dance Y&T Tribal Seeds Stick Figure Operation: Mindcrime Mute Math Mike Stud


EditoR’S NotE

NoVEMBER 5, 2015 | Vol. 27, iSSuE 29

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24 Our Mission To publish great newspapers that are successful and enduring. To create a quality work environment that encourages employees to grow professionally while respecting personal welfare. To have a positive impact on our communities and make them better places to live. Co-editors Rachel Leibrock, Nick Miller Staff Writers Janelle Bitker, Raheem F. Hosseini Assistant Editor Anthony Siino Editorial Coordinator Becca Costello Editor-at-large Melinda Welsh Contributors Daniel Barnes, Ngaio Bealum, Alastair Bland, Rob Brezsny, Jim Carnes, Deena Drewis, Joey Garcia, Cosmo Garvin, Blake Gillespie, Lovelle Harris, Jeff Hudson, Jim Lane, Garrett McCord, Kel Munger, Kate Paloy, Patti Roberts, Ann Martin Rolke, Shoka

29 Creative Director Priscilla Garcia Art Director Hayley Doshay Associate Art Director Brian Breneman Ad Design Manager Serene Lusano Production Coordinator Skyler Smith Designer Kyle Shine Custom Publications Designer Sarah Hansel Design Services Manager Anne Lesemann Contributing Photographers Lisa Baetz, Evan Duran, Wes Davis, Luke Fitz, Taras Garcia, Michael Miller, Bobby Mull, Shoka, Darin Smith, Lauran Worthy Director of Sales and Advertising Corey Gerhard Senior Advertising Consultants Rosemarie Messina, Olla Swanson, Joy Webber, Kelsi White Advertising Consultants Joseph Barcelon, Meghan Bingen, Angel DeLaO, Stephanie Johnson, Dave Nettles, Lee Roberts, Elena Ruiz, Julie Sherry Sales Assistant Matt Kjar Director of Et Cetera Will Niespodzinski Custom Publications Editor Michelle Carl Custom Publications Managing Editor Shannon Springmeyer Custom Publications Writers Kate Gonzales, Anne Stokes

NEwS + BEATS OpiNiON FEATuRE STORy ARTS&CuLTuRE NighT&dAy diSh + off mEnu STAgE FiLm muSiC + Sound AdvicE ASK JOEy ThE 420 15 miNuTES

COVER dESigN By BRiAN BRENEmAN COVER phOTO By SERENE LuSANO

Executive Coordinator Jessica Takehara Director of First Impressions David Lindsay Distribution Director Greg Erwin Distribution Services Assistant Larry Schubert Distribution Drivers Mansour Aghdam, Daniel Bowen, Heather Brinkley, Mike Cleary, Jack Clifford, Lydia Comer, John Cunningham, Lob Dunnica, Chris Fong, Ron Forsberg, Garry Foster, Joanna Gonzalez-Brown, Greg Meyers, Kenneth Powell, Gilbert Quilatan, Lloyd Rongley, Lolu Sholotan, Mark Shelton, Jonathan Taea President/CEO Jeff vonKaenel Chief Operations Officer Deborah Redmond Human Resources Manager Melanie Topp Business Manager Nicole Jackson Accounts Receivable Specialist Kortnee Angel Sweetdeals Coordinator Courtney DeShields Nuts & Bolts Ninja Christina Wukmir Senior Support Tech Joe Kakacek Developer John Bisignano System Support Specialist Kalin Jenkins

1124 Del Paso Boulevard, Sacramento, CA 95815 Phone (916) 498-1234 Sales Fax (916) 498-7910 Editorial Fax (916) 498-7920 Website www.newsreview.com SN&R is printed by Bay Area News Group. Editorial Policies Opinions expressed in SN&R are those of the authors and not of Chico Community Publishing, Inc. Contact the editor for permission to reprint articles, cartoons or other portions of the paper. SN&R is not responsible for unsolicited manuscripts. All letters received become the property of the publisher. We reserve the right to print letters in condensed form and to edit them for libel. Advertising Policies All advertising is subject to the newspaper’s Standards of Acceptance. The advertiser and not the newspaper assumes full responsibility for the truthful content of their advertising message.

Death by what? The news earlier this week was  startling. Depressing, actually. “Death Rates Rising for MiddleAged White Americans, Study Finds,”  The New York Times headline read.  Where the number fell for other racial and ethnic groups, the mortality  rate for white Americans, ages 45 to  54 years old with a high school education or less, increased by 134 deaths  per 100,000 people between 1999 and  2014, according to a November 2 study  by a pair of Princeton economists. So what’s killing them? Not what  you’d expect. Not heart disease. Not  diabetes. No, not even cancer. Rather, Angus Deaton and Anne  Case concluded after studying data  via various sources, including the  Centers for Disease Prevention, this  rise in the death rate is due to suicide  and substance abuse. White, poorly educated middleaged Americans are increasingly dying  by their own hands. The findings are  significant. And significantly alarming.  To put it into perspective: Mortality  rates for middle-aged blacks and Hispanics in the United States continued  to decline during the same period. “Only H.I.V./AIDS in contemporary  times has done anything like this,”  Deaton concluded. On the one hand it’s difficult to feel  too sorry for a demographic that,  seemingly, should be ahead of the  rat race—not handicapping its own  chances in it. On the other hand, however, the  data is indicative of bigger, more  complex social problems that are  rooted in the correlations between  education, financial security, access  and personal choices.  These are social problems that  ultimately affect everyone regardless  of age, race or ethnicity.

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“I get chaI tea. they leave me alone.”

asked at el Camino avenue and Gateway oaks drive:

Where do you feel at peace?

Cristobal Cobian student

My go-to place is somewhat physical and emotional. I open my laptop and take a deep breath and clear my mind. I then browse the Web and read articles, watch videos, if possible check out some math stuff. Physically, I like somewhere public where life is going on.

ashli Christ

anna maves

student

lawyer

Starbucks. There is something about it that is relaxing. It’s the environment; besides business meetings, most people are there kind of in their own zone. They know me. They know my drink. I get chai tea. They leave me alone. I sit in a corner and get on the phone and relax. I can feel myself decompress.

My home, first, is my happy place because that is where my family is. I have a husband and four sons, so getting away from work and spending time with them is good. Specifically, I have a deck on my house and I can sit there and read my book. I get away from electronics.

ashle y reed

tristan mCCall web designer

andrew Capps

financial aid officer

I usually go to the movies or play video games. If I am stressed, then it helps me forget about everything. Right now, I mostly play Destiny. This helps me forget about issues, but at the same time … I can get mad at people in the video games as opposed to getting mad at actual people.

student

I really like Big Sur. I like being out at the ocean and relaxing. No people around. My favorite thing is to find a beach with no one around. I look left and there is no one; I look right and there is no one. I like anywhere I can walk and fish.

I probably would go back home to Iowa and be on the farm with my mom again. That is my favorite place to be. I will go to my room and lay down on the bed with my cats and just relax. I do play some music. It could be anything from rock to heavy metal.

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A-holes next door Re “The jerks next door” by Rachel Leibrock (SN&R Feature Story,  October 29): I was pretty excited when I first signed up; I’m not naturally a social person, but I wanted to get to know my neighbors even so. What  I found in my local group was actually just dozens of messages,  which were like a very strange, loose group of neighborhood-watch  wannabes posting things like “There’s a guy riding a bike slowly  down F Street. He just passed 19th. He’s riding slowly and typing on  his phone a LOT. Keep an eye out. He’s black on a red bike.” Not even  kidding.  We let the same four or five people do the “Hey, stop being racist” or “Hey, that’s incorrect” responses, because we’re tired— and now know that all of our neighbors are assholes.

T Rhodes Midtown

Next to nothing Re “The jerks next door” by Rachel Leibrock (SN&R Feature Story, October 29):

I am on Nextdoor in the Elk Grove area. I have considered getting off it a couple of times because I get very tired of neighbors who

SATURDAY, DEC. 12

are constantly screaming that others on the site are racist when descriptions of what has been observed are reported. A description is a description, and it should be taken for what it is—nothing more and nothing less. Pamela Blankenship Elk Grove

Oh, man Re “The jerks next door” by Rachel Leibrock (SN&R Feature Story, October 29): The politically correct hypocrisy of this article is downright amusing, thanks to your smug obliviousness to your own sexism. It’s incorrect to warn a neighborhood that a “black man on a bike” was trespassing in someone’s backyard, and instead we should only warn: “man on a bike”? Shouldn’t “enlightenment” mean we should report “person on a bike”? Why is

FRIDAY, FEB. 12

it not OK to profile a black man because he’s black, but perfectly OK to profile him because he’s a man? Fred Hayward Sacramento

Thanks, neighbors Re “The jerks next door” by Rachel Leibrock (SN&R Feature Story, October 29): One thing Nextdoor is GREAT for is asking for recommendations. My house has been roofed, painted and more by a sterling contractor who lives in Tahoe Park. Thanks, neighbors! Vada Russell Sacramento

ON NeighbOrhOOd wATch App NexTdOOr: So it’s not just me who  hates NextDoor! KaTe Lenox I was a “lead” on ND and quit  because a lot of the folks in my  neighborhood turned out to be  crazy people with too much time  on their hands.

@SacNewsReview

Facebook.com/ SacNewsReview

BaRBaRa VB I loved it when I lived in  Indianapolis but the people around  here make it terrible.

KaTie Goad Lots of axe-grinding and   complaining on the Hollywood  Park/LandPark Nextdoor site.  I think it’s detrimental to my  neighborhood.

@SacNewsReview

Online Buzz contributions are not edited for grammar, spelling or clarity.

GReG BRown

FRIDAY, FEB. 26

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New Sacramento State President Robert Nelsen says getting kids to graduate more quickly, so that they don’t have to stick around and take unnecessary courses, is key.

State of Sac State SN&R chats with the university’s new president by Jeff vonKaenel

Jeff vonKaenel

is the president, CEO and majority owner of the News & Review newspapers in Sacramento, Chico and Reno.

For students hoping to walk the stage and graduate at California State University, Sacramento, they’d better be ready to wait a few years. This is because Sac State’s four-year graduation rate is 9.7 percent. That’s right: Only one out of 10 students earns a degree in four years. That number is a handful of clicks lower than the average for CSU schools, 14.2 percent, and significantly below the University of California average of 51.4 percent, according to California Postsecondary Education Commission data from 2012. The good news is that new Sacramento State President Robert Nelsen aims to change these numbers—and a lot more. He

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sat down with SN&R a few weeks back for a chat on higher education and higher challenges: Welcome to Sacramento. Why don’t you talk about your first few months here, and what you’ve gleaned about Sac State? I’ve been here almost 100 days; it’ll be 100 days at the end of the week. There is a real dedication among faculty for student success, and there is a real caring, nurturing environment. But we have a long way to go, that 9 percent graduation rate that you’ve heard me talk about is a reality.

je ffv @ ne wsr e v ie w.c o m

Why do so few students graduate in four years? A lot of it is threefold, that’s what I’ve learned. Some of it’s college readiness. Coming in, we have 56 percent of our students in remediation. Nationwide, the average is 20 percent. That’s a very high number. No. 2, we have not been good at supplying the classes that our students actually need. We’re putting in software that will solve that, but we have not been good. We had, for one [statistics] course, we had 50 students rushing for four slots to try to get in. So there are students that are just waiting. …

PHOTO COURTESY OF ROBERT NELSEN

Then, we’ve got to think about how we’re going to handle impaction. When you have over 400 nurses trying to get into a nursing program that they’re not going to get in and they end up being in social work or they end up dropping out. How do we get them into majors much more early so they don’t get to that point where suddenly, “I only wanted to be a nurse” and you drop out, or “I only wanted to be a psychologist.” Or even the entire business school is impacted at this point. We have these professions with seemingly tremendous shortages, like nurses—and we have many people who want to become nurses—and then the colleges that have nursing programs don’t have enough open slots. Then other majors, where there isn’t a lot of demand, we seem to have a lot of slots. We have a lot of slots. Like in sociology, what are we going to do with a sociology degree? It really does vary from place to place, and it becomes very difficult for the students. Impaction is created by the state. This is unique to California, at least in my experience. We are always about growth


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wAgeS Of gRIef where I’ve been before. But we turned away 3,600 students, because we’re physically capped at the number of students we can have. We’re capped at those other areas. It’s a disconnect. In terms of enabling students to graduate, how much of it has been just reallocating resources? First off, we’ve got to get more faculty, so that we can have more courses. That’s just the bottom line. When we went through the recession here, we didn’t cut courses. Instead, we hired a lot of part-time faculty. And parttime faculty can’t teach just as much as a full-time faculty, of course. So, we’re short on the number of courses we’ve got. And faculty have to be involved in deciding what the majors and curriculum will be and how it’s going to be delivered. when I spoke to the union rep about this, one of the things he mentioned is that Sac State, as opposed to other state schools, didn’t hire as many faculty. We hired more part-time faculty than full-time faculty; that is accurate. We made a decision, [previous] President [Alexander] Gonzalez and his cabinet made a decision, that what they were going to do was keep the number of seats available that they had available. They would fill those seats with part-time faculty. … Instead of going out and doing what other universities did, they cut programs. Not academic programs, but services and things like that, so that they could hire more faculty. you’ve spoken about how there needs to be a different view of Sac State, and how the university needs to be way more involved in the community. Part of the rap when I first moved to Sacramento in ’89 was it was kind of like “fort Sacramento” here. We have to change, and become a “yes university.” We’ve tended to be isolated, especially during the rough economic times. Instead of reaching out, we’ve hunkered down so we could take care of our students here. I’m on the GSAC board on purpose. the gSAc board? The Greater Sacramento Area [Economic] Council. With Barry Broome and all of those people, as we’re trying to do economic development. I’m on the Metro Chamber. I’m on the Valley Vision. Each one of my cabinet members are on, maybe it’s the Asian American Chamber or it’s the Hispanic Chamber or some organization, to try and reach out to be a part of the community. We need that, because we need more internships. … We’re only as great as the city is great.

So everything we can do to make the city even greater. what are some of the things Sac State will be accomplishing in five years? You’re going to see more co-op programs. Co-op programs are where students go out and they actually work for a semester, and then come back, and the course is built around that. You’re going to see more cultural events that are taking place, and involvement in the local communities out there, whether it’s Oak Park or Land Park. But you’ll see the arts in a larger role out in there. You’ll see more service learning courses where we are working with 501(c)(3)s.

can’t get a class, then they’ve got to wait until next semester to get a class, so they’ll take something else. That’s just what we’ve got to change. It’s the cost of living, the cost of books. We’re trying to move more and more to electronic books, more and more to rent textbooks, and things like that, to be able to keep those costs down. Housing, we’ve got to keep as affordable as we can, and I think we’re doing a fairly good job on that. But we don’t have nearly enough beds to help.

Are there plans to do more? We’re building a dormitory now that will have 400 beds. We’re purchasing from the city over on Folsom [Boulevard] “We’re going to try to a series of balldo everything we can to parks over there keep the tuition fees where where we will put in more housing they are. We are half the price there, as well.

what’s that? Service learning is when you go out and you do a project of a UC.” for, maybe it’s Loaves and will we see Sacramento State President Fishes. Maybe Sacramento State Robert Nelsen the project is going moving downtown to be helping them anytime soon? with their inventory We’re in the process of and doing the inventory looking to rent a space down process, but it’ll be reaching there and move the public policy out into those areas. [school]. And all of those programs, centralize the Small Business Development Center So, more life experiences? and work with them. For the students, yes, experiential learning. would this be a graduate program? Let’s discuss affordability for students. It would largely be graduate programs, you mentioned increasing the graduation executive programs. They’re so many rate so that they save a whole year. staffers that are actually graduates of here, If we get them out, they don’t have to take or they are graduates of Berkeley and they remediation courses, because those courses want to get their master’s degree. It’d be don’t count for anything—but they have for them largely, and the executive program to pay for them. So, getting the students and the MBAs down there. prepared when they get here, that’s going to save one to two years. … How’s the fundraising going? We’ve restarted the President’s Circle and Is the cost of Sac State going to go up? that’s $5,000 to be a part of the President’s I don’t see us raising tuition or fees at this Circle. Those funds go for study abroad; point. I have said … that, for the event we only sent 81 students abroad last year, center, we are going to raise the funds for 84 or 81, I see both numbers, but that’s less it. We’re not going to put it on the students’ than 1 percent. We need to raise money for back, and we’re going to try to do everyscholarships and funds for them. … thing we can to keep the tuition fees where I had a student today whose mother they are. We are half the price of a UC. just had a stroke. He’s going to have to be helping his mother, and everything else, Speaking as a parent that had two kids and he’s going to have to quit his job. go to a uc, it’s not the tuition that’s the And he’s thinking about dropping out. No, big cost. It’s the living on campus. It’s the we’ll help you. So there’s some emergency extra year. fund money for that person. Then the final That’s the biggest cost. [fundraising piece] is for the food pantry. We have 45 students a day going to the that’s gigantic. food pantry and asking for something. Ω That’s why I’m talking always about four, not six, year rates. Our students, if they

It was the minimum-wage deal very few wanted, foisted upon the city of Sacramento like a “broken-winged bird that cannot fly.” That’s how Councilman Steve Hansen put it while quoting poet Langston Hughes. He was one of three Sacramento City Council members to vote against a last-minute proposal that muscled through last Tuesday, despite unified opposition from business and labor interests and a raucous public discourse that put two activists in handcuffs. Alliance of Californians for Community Empowerment members Christina Arechiga and Wanda Cleveland were arrested as other activists booed and heckled Mayor Kevin Johnson for ending public comment on the revised proposal, which was put forth by Councilman Jay Schenirer as a “compromise” to a controversial, earlier version. The proposal that was adopted October 27 will increase the city’s hourly minimum wage to $12.50 by 2020. Unlike the previous version that was recommended by a city task force and then roundly disavowed, this deal doesn’t allow employers to exempt tipped workers or those who are minors or developmentally disabled. The business community got something too, in the form of a one-year implementation delay for businesses with less than 100 employees and an employer health-care credit. But the changes weren’t enough to appease labor activists who wanted a faster path to $15 an hour, or business interests who wanted no raise at all. That put council members in a political pickle, with the outgoing Johnson wanting to notch another policy victory before leaving office and Councilwoman Angelique Ashby, a mayoral candidate, using the moment to separate herself from the man with the gavel. “I don’t like any community meeting that ends with people being arrested. That just sounds completely unreasonable,” she said. “It was against my instinct to sit up here and watch that happen.” Ashby went on to criticize the proposal, garnering applause. “If the people who would benefit from a raise are saying ‘we don’t want this raise, it’s not good for us’ and the people who would be responsible for providing that raise are saying ‘we can’t do this, it’s detrimental to our business,’ I’m just a little unclear on who we’re doing this for and what the benefit is.” Statewide, the minimum wage is set to increase from $9 an hour to $10 an hour in January. The first citywide increase wouldn’t happen until 2017, when the hourly rate increases by 50 cents. In voting for the measure, Councilman Jeff Harris said it would allow the city to carefully study the local economic impacts of raising the wage, for good or ill, and respond in kind. “Folks, this is not written in stone,” he said. The proposal’s passage was met with a loud chorus of boos from the audience. After the vote, business groups like the Sacramento Metropolitan Chamber and Region Business sought to put a positive spin on a deal they didn’t support. “While City Council’s approval is not a win for the business community, it secures a more responsible increase than what we’ve seen in other California cities,” the Metro Chamber said in a statement. Tamie Dramer of Organize Sacramento called the dropped worker exemptions “a big win for us,” but criticized other aspects of the plan. She said the implementation delay would allow 98 percent of city businesses to avoid paying $12.50 an hour until 2021. Harris indicated he hoped state lawmakers would see Sacramento and other wage-hiking cities as a reason to replace patchwork approaches with a statewide plan. Meanwhile, labor and business groups are preparing dueling ballot proposals that would ask voters to realize or avoid an hourly $15 rate by 2020 respectively. (Barbara Harvey and Raheem F. Hosseini)

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Tonight! Great seats still available

“One of the English-speaking world’s best chroniclers of race, class and identity in urban confines.” —The Philadelphia Inquirer

In Conversation with Zadie Smith FRI, NOV 6 • 8PM Twice named on Granta’s “Best of Young British Novelists” list (2003 and 2013) Smith has built a substantial career as one of the finest novelists writing today. She is joined in conversation by UC Davis professor Yiyun Li, named among Granta’s “Best of Young American Novelists” in 2007.

“Epic, deeply focused and grandly beautiful.” —The Telegraph

Akram Khan Company kaash THU, NOV 19 • 8PM

A rhythmic exploration between science and mythology through modern and Kathak dance. Music by composer Nitin Sawhney and set design by sculptor Anish Kapoor.

San Francisco Symphony

Michael Tilson Thomas, conductor Leonidas Kavakos, violin

THU, NOV 12 • 8PM

Works by Sibelius and Schumann.

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Run for revolution The Sacramento Food Bank is growing,   needs your help starting at just by jeff vonkaenel

je ffv @ ne wsr e v ie w.c o m

stores. Having seen the Senior Gleaners It started in an Oak Park church warehouse before the merger, I was basement 39 years ago. Father Daniel stunned to see how many improvements Madigan, seeing people in need, began collecting and distributing food. That was have been made. The Sacramento Food Bank now has the facility to match its the beginning of the Sacramento Food ambitions. Bank & Family Services, which now Sacramento Food Bank President provides food for 150,000 Sacramentans Blake Young wants to take the organizaevery month. tion beyond providing food and dramatiOne hundred and fifty thousand cally increase family services. Describing children, senior citizens, single moms, the approach as holistic, he says, “It’s not people with only part-time work, people just about food, but services that lead to with full-time work but hungry bellies healthier lifestyles and self-sufficiency.” at home and people down on their luck. The Food Bank offers 14 different One hundred and fifty thousand is a big types of services, including adult, youth number. Imagine the Sleep Train Arena and parent education; technology trainfilling up nine times. ing, and health and nutrition and An even bigger number is the clothing classes. There is a 245,000 Sacramento County certain logic to having food, residents who are “food clothing and services all insecure.” This means at the same location, as that they struggle to find I will be there. obviously many of the access to quality food I will be running. people who need one and often are desperate And I will be giving service will need the for calories. Not being others. able to afford healthy thanks. But a revolution needs food, they purchase volunteers, donations—and inexpensive, unhealthy, also runners. The 22nd annual fattening foods. Run to Feed the Hungry, benefitWith so much need, the staff at ing Sacramento Food Bank & Family the Sacramento Food Bank wants to start Services, with more than 27,000 particia revolution. They want to first dramatipants, is the largest Thanksgiving run in cally increase their food services, and the country, generating nearly $1 million then add to their family services. for services. This is the equivalent of Until last year, there were three major 17 percent of the Food Bank budget. Sacramento agencies that collected I will be there. I will be running. and distributed food: Sacramento Food And I will be giving thanks. Thanks Bank, California Emergency Foodlink that my family is not hungry. Thanks and Senior Gleaners. In 2014, Foodlink that we have the Sacramento Food stopped its local food distribution to focus on its statewide program. The Food Bank. And thanks that I am living in a town where 27,000 runners will show Bank took over those accounts. up to help the Sacramento Food Bank Senior Gleaners, suffering from start a revolution. Ω severe financial problems but having a massive warehouse in need of repair, merged with the Sacramento Food Bank. Register to run to feed the hungry on Thanksgiving All of sudden, the Sacramento Food Day at www.runtofeedthehungry.com. Bank went from serving 50,000 people to 150,000 people. Having one instead of three food Jeff vonKaenel is the president, CEO and majority banks is much more efficient for the owner of the News & Review. major food donors such as the grocery 12   |   SN&R   |   11.05.15


Signs, signs, everywhere? Does our forthcoming new downtown need more promotional movie banners draped on the sides of buildings, and glowing LED billboards celebrating the likes of craft beer and barbecue? These types of high-profile advertisements rake in a lot of coin, and that’s why, in the coming months, the city of Sacramento will consider the creation of a downtown “Special Sign District.” The proposed sign district would encompass J to L streets from Third to Seventh, a corridor that includes the new arena, four historical buildings, presumed remnants of the old mall and the forthcoming Downtown Commons shops, restaurants, bars and a hotel with residences. The driving force behind the district is, presumably, the opportunity to rake in serious dollars from mostly local, but some national, advertisers, companies and brands that want to reach the hundreds of thousands of arena attendees each year. The catch is that the city and the Kings want the new arena to be a place where members of the community join together. The term they use is a “regional center.” And, while this paper has been critical of the arena subsidy—and we’ve groaned at branding like “DoCo”—we, too, want this new downtown hub to succeed. So, will signs prove attractive to the community—or will the ad onslaught be a turnoff? We’re more than a bit concerned about the Entertainment and Sports Center Special Sign District, a project simmering for more than a year at City Hall and that finally was scheduled to appear in front of city council this past Tuesday. The good news is that city staff is asking the right questions. They don’t want our new downtown to become the next Times Square. Phew! And they’re worried about signs that compromise historical buildings, or liposuction billboards, the overconcentration and oversaturation of signage, and ads that, generally speaking, make downtown a corporate-branding hellhole. A staff report on the sign district even notes that, if the new downtown signs consist mostly of present Sacramento sign inventory, “existing outdoor advertising would not enhance the district.” In other words, the signs that we already see around town might make the new downtown look ugly. We’re worried about sign upkeep. The city is floating the idea of having a private group operate and maintain all the signs. That could work—but maintenance is costly, and if these dozens of glowing LED signs and towering ads on building facades aren’t properly maintained, downtown could look haggard and tacky. The city planning and design commission cautioned staff last year to “be bold but respectful” with the sign district. We’d like to add: less is more. A lot less. Lest we end up greeting the world with a 70-foot banner of Seth Rogen on the side of the Holiday Inn. Ω

Downtown could look haggard and tacky.

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BUILDING A

HEALTHY S A C R A M E N T O

Just Add Water Students learn about cultivating food through aquaponics BY S U S A N W I N LOW

Aquaponics isn’t exactly an everyday word. But to a group of at-risk students in the South Sacramento area who hooked up with Green Tech Education, it’s become a common one. Aquaponics is the marriage of raising aquatic critters, called aquaculture, with hydroponics, which is raising plants in water. The sustainable ecosystem uses fish waste instead of soil to provide nutrients to the plant roots and conserve water since the plants use recirculating water. At harvest time, consumers get both vegetables and a source of protein from the edible fish. The process was new to Simeon Gant, Green Tech’s executive director, when one of his colleagues suggested this project for the nonprofit career technical education organization, which offers supplemental education to students. The organization received a grant from The California Endowment’s Building Healthy Communities initiative. Most of the Healthy Foods Aquaponics Project students — who are age 16 to 19 and struggling academically — come from the nonprofit’s partnership with the Sacramento County Office of Education. “We were looking for something innovative and different,” Gant says. “We thought this was a good way to teach [students] how to grow their own food and learn about healthy eating habits.” Adds Gant, “A lot of our students are going to the neighborhood convenience store and having a meal on … Cheetos.”

Gant says the program also teaches about small business such as how to sell at farmers markets and potentially sell to restaurants.

Trudeau says he doesn’t see aquaponics taking over traditional gardening — “they’re very complimentary,” he says.

The project currently is growing kale and beans and raising blue gill fish. It’s looking forward to a fi rst harvest in November.

Indeed, at the Green Tech aquaponics site, lettuce, herbs, cilantro and fresh strawberries have graced the area around the aquaponics greenhouse.

“WE THOUGHT THIS WAS A GOOD WAY TO TEACH [STUDENTS] HOW TO GROW THEIR OWN FOOD AND LEARN ABOUT HEALTHY EATING HABITS.”

“First and foremost, this is science,” Gant says. “When we bring our students in they can actually see how science works.”

Green Tech program students tour the organization’s new aquaponic greenhouse in Oak Park. Photo by Anne Stokes

The group started with a blighted house in Oak Park in June 2014. They brought over a group of students to help clean the outside of the house and then erect a 1,000-foot greenhouse and install three different aquaponics systems with the help of Paul Trudeau, the owner of Southside Aquaponic Farm in Sacramento. “Some people say it’s beyond organic,” Trudeau says. “If you use pesticides you kill off the fish. It’s like an ecosystem you’re making. It’s a very natural system, very natural food.”

Health Happens in Neighborhoods. Health Happens in Schools. Health Happens with Prevention.

Want to be part of a community change? Visit sacbbhc.org/join-the-hub.

PAID WITH A GRANT FROM THE CALIFORNIA ENDOWMENT |

SN&R   |  11.05.15

In 2010, The California Endowment launched a 10-year, $1 billion plan to improve the health of 14 challenged communities across the state. Over the 10 years, residents, community-based organizations and public institutions will work together to address the socioeconomic and environmental challenges contributing to the poor health of their communities.

Simeon Gant, Executive Director, Green Tech

Your ZIP code shouldn’t predict how long you’ll live – but it does. Staying healthy requires much more than doctors and diets. Every day, our surroundings and activities affect how long – and how well – we’ll live.

14

BUILDING HEALTHY COMMUNITIES

www.SacBHC.org


’S mento SacraerS and winn S—with loSer ry pointS ra arbit

Ǥ ͳ͵ǧͳͷ ʹͲͳͷ

What’s the Matter? The Curtis park village developer Paul Petrovich really wants to build that damn gas station. Consider this “Our Lives Matter” poster (see right): If CPV gets a Safeway and gas station, it will benefit nearby black neighborhoods with good-paying jobs. Scorekeeper had no clue that pumping gas was part of the Black Lives Matter movement … WTF?!

Offsite Field Trips & Tours Available Friday–Sunday www.caswanfestival.com

- 916 #aMinextKJ Scorekeeper would like to point out that sightings of women wearing the “#aminextKJ” T-shirts are real. That is all.

even Cute gets eviCted? A family of burrowing owls in North Natomas took residence in the Montauk housing development during months of halted construction, according to a report in the Sacramento Bee. With construction set to resume, however, there’s one problem: The owls get squatter’s rights! Turns out they can only stay through nesting season, which begins in February and ends in September.

+ 100

MiniMuM debate, MaxiMuM punishMent police arrested two attendees at last week’s minimum-wage City Council meeting and charged them with misdemeanor disturbing a public meeting. Councilman Steven Hansen spoke out against these arrests—and SN&R agrees: The activists may not have followed procedure, but speaking out should not be a reason for arrest.

- 12.50

Write a Letter to the Future about Climate Change Join Michael Pollan, Jane Smiley, Bill McKibben & more! Write a letter to the year 2100, addressed to your future family or community. Tell them how what happened to the climate in 2015 will impact them. Post your letter online now. This is a national letterwriting campaign leading up to the UN Climate Change Conference in Paris this December. www.LetterStotheFuture.org

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Our writer watched every single Bond flick. In order. Here’s what he learned.

THE SPY WHO TAUGHT ME by Brian Breneman brianrb@newsreview.com @Brenemania

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My first exposure to the James Bond series was probably some “Women of Bond” feature in an early-’80s Playboy magazine I found tucked away in my dad’s filing cabinet. It was there that I learned the core tenets of the franchise: beautiful women, fast cars, high-tech gadgets, globetrotting espionage and expensive taste. According to Playboy, I was supposed to emulate this man. I needed to watch these movies to gawk at the hot babes, to lust over the gizmos and swoon (inwardly, quietly, manly) each time he escapes yet another certain-death scenario with impossibly casual panache. I was supposed to ask What Would James Bond Do? Fast forward to last year, when I realized that I’d made it to my mid-30s without ever seeing a single Bond movie besides 1995’s GoldenEye, and if I’m really being honest I only watched it because of the Nintendo 64 game of the same name. I took a cold, hard look around my life and I saw no tuxedos, no gizmos, no license to kill and no martinis. I didn’t even own a car, let alone one with a rocket launcher hidden in the trunk, but I had a bunch of remastered Blu-rays and a lot of free time.

Now, with a new Bond film Spectre set for a November 6 release, I knew I had only one course of action: watch every James Bond movie in chronological order. What Would James Bond Do? It was time to find out.

Dr.No m eaNs No I quickly discovered that the sexual adventures of Bond are key to his mythos. He lives in a world where every single woman he encounters is eye-poppingly beautiful, and every single one cannot wait to get in his pants. Only in the world of porn will you find fictional women willing to get naked faster—and those are just the willing ones. Throughout his career, Bond has occasionally engaged in between-the-sheets trysts that could charitably be called “reluctant” or “one-sided.” In 1964’s Goldfinger, Pussy Galore goes in as an enemy agent (and lesbian!) and comes out a perfectly submissive “helpful animal” ready to aid Bond in his liberation of Fort Knox. “Why do Chinese girls taste different from all other girls?” Connery asks one of his Asian conquests in You Only Live Twice (1967), smirking as if he’s the cleverest man in the world. In On Her Majesty’s Secret Service (1969), it only takes George Lazenby about 12 hours to score some strange after parting ways with the woman he’ll marry later in the film. What Would James Bond Do? In 1971’s Diamonds Are Forever, he’d choke a woman out with her own bikini top.


AND THE BOND PLAYS ON When you watch 23 movies in a row, it’s inevitable  that you’ll develop some favorites. These are mine,  presented without comment because I could probably  go on for a while about them. Wanna talk about it?  Tweet your delicious tears or enthusiastic high-fives  to @Brenemania. For the opinons of a more refined  filmgoer, check out SN&R movie critic Daniel Barnes’  picks on page 19.

THE FILMS BEST

WORST

1.  From Russia   with Love 2.  Casino Royale 3.  Live and Let Die 4.  Licence to Kill 5.  GoldenEye

1.  The Man with   the Golden Gun 2.  Moonraker 3.  The World Is   Not Enough 4.  Octopussy 5.  For Your Eyes Only

THE SONGS BEST Clockwise from top left: » Sean Connery ESCAPES DANGER WITH a jetpack in Thunderball.

What Would James Bond Do? He’d have unprotected sex and then jump on a plane. At least Connery and Lazenby looked like someone that women might want to spend time with (Connery’s hairpiece notwithstanding). Roger Moore, who was 45 when he took up the role of Bond and 58 when he left it, had women one-half to one-third of his age tripping over themselves to jump into bed with him with troubling regularity. I don’t know how his wrinkly face smooshed up against Lynn-Holly Johnson or Grace Jones played at the time, but I found the whole affair rather skeevy. Of course, we don’t actually see what happens when the scene fades away—maybe they just make out for a while and then he tells them stories about the 1920s.

“THE SPY WHO TAUGHT ME” continued on page 19

» Diana Rigg stars as Mrs. James Bond in On Her Majesty’s Secret Service. » Timothy Dalton is menaced by a young Benicio Del Toro in Licence To Kill . » Christopher Walken as genetically engineered KGB agent Max Zorin in A View To A Kill. » Sean Connery is turning Japanese in You Only Live Twice .

» The Man With The Golden Gun’s showstopping car stunt, which gave us the slide whistle heard ’round the world. » Roger Moore, undercover as a clown in Octopussy.

WORST

1.  “Tomorrow Never  Dies” by Sheryl Crow 2.  “Licence to Kill” by  Gladys Knight 3.  “Nobody Does it  Better” by   Carly Simon

THE VILLAINS BEST 1.  Red Grant (Robert  Shaw), From Russia  with Love 2.  Kananga (Yaphet  Kotto) and Baron  Samedi (Geoffrey  Holder), Live and   Let Die 3.  Franz Sanchez  (Robert Davi),   Licence to Kill 4.  Max Zorin  (Christopher Walken),  A View to a Kill 5.  Gustav Graves   (Toby Stephens),   Die Another Day 6.  Elliot Carver  (Jonathan Pryce),  Tomorrow Never Dies

1.  “Die Another Day” by  Madonna 2.  “You Know My Name”  by Chris Cornell 3.  “All Time High” by Rita  Coolidge

WORST 1.  Hugo Drax (Michael  Lonsdale), Moonraker 2.  Karl Stromberg (Curt  Jurgens), The Spy  Who Loved Me 3.  Emilio Largo (Adolfo  Celi), Thunderball 4.  Kamal Khan (Louis  Jordan), Octopussy 5.  Renard (Robert  Carlyle), The World Is  Not Enough 6.  Bambi (Lola Larson)  and Thumper (Trina  Parks), Diamonds Are  Forever

-B.B.

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“the sPY who taUGht Me” continued from page 17

From 1 962 with love The series starts strong with the hard-nosed Bond of Dr. No and realpolitik espionage of 1962’s From Russia With Love. But with Goldfinger, released one year later, something happened—they established The Formula: a rigid set of rules that would constrain the next 17 movies. It forces each film to adhere to a strict recipe, demanding that each benchmark must be hit. Playful banter with unspoiled secretary Miss Moneypenny? Check. A visit from gadget-master Q? Check. Super-specific gizmos that inevitably prove to be useful in a situation that no reasonable person could have predicted yet are still referred to as “standard-issue”? Check. Many of these films end with a scene where M and a bunch of military leaders watch Bond have sex. Make of that what you will. As the budgets balloon and the evil lairs get bigger, the stories get more and more ridiculous in a fruitless bid to top the last entry. In 1967’s You Only Live Twice, tasked to gather intelligence on Bond arch-nemesis Ernst Stavro Blofeld’s enormous command center, this time set inside a mountain, Bond must pose as a simple Japanese villager.

Look, watching these films proved to me that I can suspend disbelief for a lot of things, but 6-foot-2-inch Scotsman Sean Connery as a Japanese man? No. Dr. No No No. After Roger Moore’s first entry, 1973’s excellent Live and Let Die, the series quickly devolves into nonsense, with the producers’ apathy and outright contempt for their viewers coming into sharper focus with each passing film. For example, the bad guys in Thunderball (1965), The Spy Who Loved Me (1977) and Moonraker (1979) all have the same exact same evil plot, which basically boils down to “Use a giant submarine/boat/ space shuttle to capture regular-sized submarines/boats/space shuttles, then create a new world order somehow.” Toss in the fact that Moonraker was rushed into production to capitalize on Star Wars mania (a worthy goal, yet one that they failed at spectacularly), and you start to get the feeling that quality control was slipping a bit. At one point, I became convinced that the producers and writers of these films actively hated me, and were taunting me from just beyond the screen. “Hey kid, what if I told you that The Man with the Golden Gun (1974) stars Christopher Lee as a deadly circus-trained assassin? Cool, right? Well, the fun doesn’t stop there—turns

NUmBeR of filmS iN WhiCh a villaiN RevealS DetailS of hiS PlaN oNly BeCaUSe he BelieveS BoND Will SooN Be DeaD:

7

out he’s got a third nipple!” Plus, the extra nipple is repeatedly referred to as “superfluous,” as if it’d be less weird if the extra nipple were functional. (Bond screenwriter Ian Fleming was fond of giving his bad guys very specific physical deformities, like Le Chiffre’s Salbutamol inhaler and tendency to cry tears of blood in 2006’s Casino Royale.)

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I did not care for Roger Moore’s time in the tux. I’d been moving through the series at a swift pace—about two Bonds a week—until Moonraker stopped me dead in my tracks. When I started back up two months later, it seemed as if any vitality the series possessed had now congealed into a thick, campy sap from which neither fun nor excitement could escape. What Would James Bond Do? In Moonraker, he’d drive a gondola-car through the streets of Venice, eliciting double-takes from tourists, a drunk and, tragically, a pigeon.

“the sPY who taUGht Me” continued on page 21

It was the best of bond, It was the worst of bond SN&R film critic Daniel Barnes judges decades’ worth of the suave superspy The cinema of James Bond often gets broken down by his accessories—the cars, the guns, the gadgets, the songs— but after all the martinis have been shaken, not stirred, the quality of a Bond film is directly related to the quality of the Bond. Six actors have played the iconic British superspy over the course of 23 “official” Bond films (the upcoming Spectre makes 24), and each one left their mark on the role, for better or worse.

BeSt BoND: SeaN CoNNeRy The all-time no-brainer. Daniel Craig has undeniably reinvigorated the franchise, but you could cast Hologram Tupac as James Bond and the role would still be associated with Connery. His charisma packaged with a titillating formula created a new genre, and beyond any feelings of nostalgia and birthright, Connery’s films are consistently good, with Goldfinger remaining the franchise gold standard.

WoRSt BoND: PieRCe BRoSNaN You thought I was going Dalton! Sure, Timothy Dalton was a lousy Bond, the star of two unmemorable films, the better of which prominently featured Wayne Newton. But at least he was a Bond for his times, leaner and meaner to match

the action heroes of his era. Brosnan’s Bond was four interchangeable movies of money-grabbing sleepwalk, producing most of the worst Bond films.

SeCoND WoRSt BoND: timothy DaltoN Because, seriously. Dalton’s brooding outlaw Bond is probably the closest precursor to Craig, but he never fit the part, and his movies are cut-rate.

iNComPlete BoND: GeoRGe lazeNBy Lazenby only made one Bond movie, 1969’s On Her Majesty’s Secret Service, and then declined to return for the followup. On Her Majesty’s is often (ignorantly) cited as a failure, but it’s a solid entry, taking the character in a slightly more realistic direction after the ridiculous You Only Live Twice.

UNoffiCial BoND: SeaN CoNNeRy (aND otheRS) The Albert Broccoli family has owned the movie rights to James Bond since 1961, but a few “unofficial” Bond movies have been made outside the Eon Productions canon. Before the Craig version, Casino Royale was first made into a 1950’s

TV episode with Barry Nelson, and later into a semisatirical monstrosity starring David Niven. Connery also made an unofficial return in 1983’s non-Eon Never Say Never Again, a remake of his 1965 success Thunderball.

PRoBlematiC BoND: RoGeR mooRe The Bond movies are extended male fantasies, and there’s no more outlandish male fantasy than a lumbering, leering, bronzed and creased Moore playing an action hero who magnetizes women to his dick.

BoURNe-aGaiN BoND: DaNiel CRaiG After decades of smirking sex-predator Bonds, the role was rebooted for Daniel Craig as a dark, intense badass, a change that put the character in line with contemporaries like Jason Bourne (not to mention modern sexual harassment policies). Craig brought Connery charm and modern physicality to Dalton’s seething outsider figure, but the changes made the character seem less like James Bond and more like everyone else. Still, 2013’s Skyfall left the franchise well-tended yet open-ended, and that uncertain future makes the upcoming Spectre all the more enticing.

—D.B. 11.05.15

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“THE SPY WHO TAUGHT ME” continued from page 19 The campiness doesn’t let up. In fact, it intensifies to a fever pitch in 1985’s A View to a Kill, where 40 minutes about Russian scientists using gene therapy to engage in racehorse doping somehow gives way to Christopher Walken and Grace Jones trying to flood Silicon Valley to gain a monopoly on microchip manufacturing. (Side note: I defy anyone to describe the plot of any James Bond movie without using a ridiculous run-on sentence like I just did.) The complicated sexual politics of the ’60s and ’70s gave way to the complicated geopolitics of the ’80s, with Timothy Dalton teaming up with the Afghani mujahedeen to fight the Soviets in The Living Daylights (1987),

misogynist dinosaur.” Of course, the film also stars Famke Janssen as Xenia Onatopp (UGHHHHH), as assassin who derives sexual pleasure from crushing men with her powerful thighs. So, Bond the character is a sexist, misogynist dinosaur—not the writers and producers of this film. Got it. This was also the era of Austin Powers, which satirized many of the series’ more fantastical elements and tropes, like Blofeld’s descent from malevolent criminal mastermind into “some guy in a wheelchair and a Nehru jacket,” or Bond’s probable patient-zero status for more than a few STDs. What Would James Bond Do? He’d have unprotected sex and then jump on a plane.

number of times animals are used to kill people:

10

number of times tHat animal is a sHark:

4

With Moonraker, it seemed as if any vitality the series possessed had congealed into a thick, campy sap from which neither fun nor excitement could escape. Brosnan’s Bond was done in, however, not by a murderous shark or medieval torture device, but by The Formula. His slide into Roger Moore-style campiness is almost unbearable to watch. I sat through the exxxtreme tidal wave surfing, I tolerated the invisible car, I gritted my teeth through Madonna’s theme for Die Another Day, but by the time Denise Richards shows up in The World Is Not Enough to help him fight a terrorist whose superpower is an inability to feel pain (I remember that plot point specifically because they referred to it about a thousand times), I was begging for mercy. Fortunately, relief arrived in the form of Daniel Craig. Here, finally, was my Bond, a 5-foot-10-inch murder machine cut from the same cloth as Timothy Dalton but with better editing, writing and music. When he runs through a whole slab of drywall in 2006’s Casino

Royale’s intense opening chase scene, I knew that I was home. When he strands the villain of 2008’s Quantum of Solace in the middle of the desert with only a can of motor oil to drink, I knew that I was feeling the same elation that young men before me had felt when Sean Connery wrestled a shark in Thunderball, or when Roger Moore rode inside a submersible disguised as an alligator in Octopussy (1983). There is no doubt in my mind that this man could kick Jason Bourne’s ass with one hand tied behind his back. What Would James Bond Do? In Skyfall (2012), he’d take a sniper’s bullet if it meant getting his man.

CONNERY LAZENBY MOORE DALTON BROSNAN CRAIG

and infiltrating the inner circle of a Latin American drug lord in the satisfyingly violent Licence to Kill (1989). Only the former really feels like a Bond movie, with the latter coming off more like a straightahead ’80s action movie that takes full advantage of its PG-13 rating (surely the most limbs ripped off by sharks and machinery of any Bond film). Next came Pierce Brosnan, whose tenure as Bond was hotly anticipated by those who found Dalton’s grim take on Bond off-putting. Why, people must have asked, isn’t this secret agent eating more caviar? Turns out Brosnan was the right man for the job—1995’s GoldenEye was 10 times the film I remembered, crackling with modern action and crisp editing. The film received a lot of attention for its self-aware tone, going out of its way to point out that Bond is, in the words of MI6 director M, “a sexist,

DANIEL CRAIG PLAYS CHESS AGAINST AN UNKNOWN OPPONENT IN SPECTRE. HE STILL LOOKS A BIT LIKE HE’S ABOUT TO TEAR SOMEONE’S FACE OFF, DOESN’T HE?

aCtor

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Women bedded

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MOORE

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3

N ever let th em see you bleed Fifty-five hours of viewing time, 376 dead henchmen and 51 women bedded later, I find myself actually looking forward to the release of a Bond film for the first time. My hopes are high for the 24th film in the series, Spectre, featuring Christoph Waltz as a character rumored to be Blofeld, and Monica Bellucci as the first age-appropriate Bond love interest in, well, ever. The film finds Daniel Craig and his legacy at a turning point:

will he remain a dead-eyed killer, or will the gradual reintroduction of elements from The Formula (Q, Moneypenny, etc.) drag him down to the same fate as Connery, Moore and Brosnan? In 1999’s The World Is Not Enough, Q retires, but not before imparting a final bit of wisdom on Bond: “Never let them see you bleed.” It’s more than a poignant line for Q to go out on, it’s the moral of the entire series and Bond’s mystical superpower: just be cool. It’s the thing that’s made him such a resilient cultural figure—it doesn’t matter whether he’s playing baccarat, riding a motorcycle down a bobsled track or saving the world, nothing ever seems new to him. He’s always been there before. When he walks into a room and there’s some guy with an eye patch or a robot hand behind a table and he says, “Ah, Mr. Bond, I’ve been expecting you,” the camera cuts to Bond and he’s got a look on his face like damn right you’ve been expecting me. And it’s that confidence that captures our attention, because we all want to believe that when the going gets tough, we’ll be able to stay calm and save the day. And who knows—maybe someday I’ll find myself in over my head and think to myself What Would James Bond Do? Ω

Sources: BONDBYTHENUMBERS.TUMBLR.COM, MOVIES.COM

11.05.15    |   SN&R   |   21


Shop local and Save

Gift certificateS to local reStaurantS, retail ShopS and boutiqueS for up to 50% off ASR Restaurant & Lounge: $25 for $12.50 Baker’s Donuts: $10 for $5 Broadway Coffee Co.: $5 for $2.50 Drewski’s Hot Rod Kitchen: $15 for $7.50 Edible Arrangements: $25 for $10 El Jardin Mexican Restaurant: $20 for $10 Federalist Public House: $10 for $8 Finnegan’s Public House: $20 for $10 Goldfield Trading Post: $25 for $12.50

Incredible Pets: $50 for $30 Jimmy’s Barber Garage: $20 for $10 Lola’s Lounge: $20 for $10 Mana Japanese Restaurant & Korean BBQ: $25 for $15 Midikat Boutique: $25 for $6.25 Planet of the Vapes: $20 for $10 Sacramento Pipeworks: $100 for $60 Sei Bella Boutique: $25 for $6.25

and More... check out our website to get great deals on concerts at ace of Spades, Goldfield trading post and harlow’s.

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NO SERVICE FEES!

Sky High Sports: $12 for $6 Sleek Wax Bar: $25 for $12.50 That Guy Eyewear: $50 for $25 The Parlor Ice Cream Puffs: $5 for $3 Umai Savory Hot Dogs: $10 for $5 Vallejo’s: $20 for $9 Yellow Cab Co.: $20 for $10 Zanzibar Trading Co.: $25 for $15

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CELEBRATE RENO’S INCREDIBLE MUSIC, ART AND CULINARY SCENES.

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An Sn&R wRIteR And hIS fAmIly tRAvel tO IRelAnd tO SlOw dOwn, wAlk the clIffS And SIp On SOme GuInneSS

story & photos by

O

sasha

ver the Burren, a windswept, rocky moor in the far west of Ireland, clouds hang heavy. One can walk on the hard, pocked rocks, surrounded by tall grasses, purple and yellow wildflowers and brambles, for miles; look at the vastness of the Atlantic past the cliffs that border the Burren, see the mossy green hills and the intimidatingly large boulders that populate the slopes, and convince oneself that one has found a land at the edge of the known world.

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abramsky

It’s a convenient romance, and one that drew me to the region with my children. A not dissimilar impulse to that which in past years has taken me to Iceland, to Patagonia, to India’s Thar Desert. But it’s also a fiction. In fact, the Burren—an ancient geologic curiosity, its limestone rocks formed out of what was once, hundreds of millions of years ago, a tropical seabed, its soils eroded and stones shaped by the ebb and flow of ice sheets during recent ice ages—is a wondrous intersection of human cultivation and nature. In subtle harmony with the gray rock faces and long ledges of stone, are numerous rock walls, built by herders and small landowners over many, many centuries. In these enclosures, well-fed cattle and sleek horses roam. Coming up out of the deep green hills are small houses, many of them thatched; old churches; the occasional gray, stone castle.

This is a landscape across which the English revolutionary leader Oliver Cromwell’s invading soldiers fought locals in the mid-17th century. It’s a fierce, treeless, landscape—there were so few trees, one Cromwellian soldier reputedly declared, that they couldn’t even find branches from which to hang people—but also a strangely serene one, a place where the rhythms of generations slow time down. I think that, in many ways, it is the interruption of the regular march of time that we crave when we travel. It forces us to contemplate the world not just through different eyes, but at a different tempo. We take off, in a plane, from one city, the mores of which we live our daily lives within, and we land in someone else’s world. It, the journey, the arrival, presents us with the rhythms of other histories and unfamiliar stories and legends.


It’s bookworm season see nIGHt&DaY

25

GInGer for tHe cure see HomeGrown

27

four-star fresH mex see DIsH

28

Love: an eDucatIon see ask JoeY

43

The author, pictured in the bottom photo with his children, visited Ireland to give his kids an educational experience— and as a way to “interrupt the march of time.”

Time, and history, is heavier in rural Ireland; it flows slowly: Guinness, rather than lager, in its consistency. It’s a place of hundreds of years of tribal wars, centuries more of bitter struggles against the English. It’s a tiny land with more than its fair share of drama. Winston Churchill once said of the Balkans that it produced more history than it could consume; the same could well be said of Ireland. We had flown into Dublin on July 4, and spent a jet-lagged afternoon wondering the streets around Trinity College, dining, when we got hungry somewhere between lunch and dinner time, on the rooftop terrace at Parnell Heritage Bar and Grill—named after a famed late 19th-century nationalist leader; looking at the myriad monuments; and wondering in and out of the numerous bookstores of the city’s elegant center. I bought my children a four-euro edition of Joyce’s A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man. Not for now; but, hopefully, as a memento for down the road. At the airport, we had rented a car, and a day after arriving we drove three hours westward, stopping briefly at the 16th-century Dunguaire Castle, perched above the mud flaps just inland from the coast, and into the tiny rural lanes of County Clare. Our destination: the Blackberry Lodge, a small B&B located on the northern end of the hamlet of Doolin, famed for its nighttime Irish pub music—McGann’s, McDermott’s, and O’Connor’s vie for patrons—and its locale. The coastal road to Fanore, shade upon shade of gray cliffs and, on the east side of the thoroughfare, gray rocky expanses, winds northwards past the Burren’s edge. The epic dark brown Cliffs of Moher zigzag out into the rough ocean to the south of town. We walked those cliffs for hours, the children taking it in turns to whip themselves up into panics—Daddy, we’re too high. Daddy, we’re scared we’re going to fall. Daddy, why did you make us come on this walk?—alternating with awe. There’s nothing gentle about these cliffs. They are sheer rock faces, vertical drops into the ocean far below. And, in case there’s any doubt as to the lethality of this Tolkien-esque landscape, this place where sea and land so jarringly meet, there’s a sign near the entrance to the Cliffs of Moher walk in remembrance to all those who have died there. The sign doesn’t tell readers how many that might be, but the implication is clear: Walk here at your own peril. And, at least on the day we were there— a day of rare and splendid sunshine—that’s exactly what hundreds of people, speaking a babel of tongues from around the world, had chosen to do. It was, apparently, where many,

many tourists had come to indulge their edge-of-the-world fantasies. After the walk, we came back to the Blackberry Lodge, parked our car, and walked the half-mile down to McGann’s pub. It was late, but still light with that wonderful gentle glow of a high summer evening in the northern seas. They seated us by the unlit fireplace, adjacent to where the trio of musicians would soon start playing. We ordered stews and drinks, and settled down to hear the pipes and banjos. It was someone else’s rhythm, and drinking my Guinness and looking at my tired children gamely trying to stay awake, I thought for the umpteenth time that day how far from home we were.

It is the interruption of the regular march of time that we crave when we travel. It forces us to contemplate the world not just through different eyes, but at a different tempo.

Over the Burren the wind blew, with nothing tall to stop it, nothing to make more gentle the harshness of the stones underfoot. During the day, it is a glorious sound, a symphony of whipped hair and excited voices distorted by the bluster; it is a cleansing wind. At night, in the bed in the secondfloor room in the B&B, it terrifies me. It is a cacophony of loneliness, of ships sunk off the coast, of drowning, vanished men. I sit in bed, awake, alone, and mentally shiver. The next day, we found a half-skull atop one of those stones, a skull that looked like it had once belonged to a sheep. Look carefully, we were told, in a delicate, lilting voice, by the enthusiastic tour guide at a nearby cave, and one could find 5,000-year-old burial mounds rearing up out of the landscape. The way he talked, he could have introduced elves and fairies into the conversation and I would have believed him. The froth on my lunchtime Guinness at the pub in Fanore was thick. My children each asked to have a taste.

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Jae Song


FOR ThE WEEk OF NOvEMBER 5

Bike Dog Anniversary Weekend THURSDAY, NOVEMBER 5, THROUGH SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 8

There

is no hard science behind the fact that the arrival of the  cooler-weather months marks peak bookworm season,  but let’s be real for a second: During the summer, people are always trying to  force you to “get fresh air” and “enjoy the sunshine” and “change out of your  reading culottes for once.” Come autumn, everyone is itching to curl up under a  blanket with a cup of tea and binge on Netflix, so the fact that you choose to stay  inside and willfully damage your eyes by reading for seven hours on a Sunday is  barely conspicuous. This week, the city is full of opportunities for the bookish, beginning with conversations with two literary heavyweights: On Friday, November 5, from 7 p.m.  to 9 p.m., New York Times bestselling author Sarah vowell will be at the UC Davis  Conference Center Ballroom (500 Alumni Lane in Davis) discussing and  signing her latest book, Lafayette in the Somewhat United States. The  event is free. The following evening, UC Davis professor and author  Yiyun Li will be moderating a conversation with Zadie Smith, author  of the acclaimed novels White Teeth, On Beauty and NW, at the  Mondavi Center (9399 Old Davis Road in Davis). The conversation begins at 8 p.m. and tickets ($13.50-$19.51;   student discounts available) can be purchased at  www.mondaviarts.org. Readers will have the opportunity to stockpile  in a serious way with a book sale at the Crocker Art Museum (216 O Street) on Saturday,  November 7, from 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., and the  Warehouse Book Sale at the Book Den   (8250 Belvedere Avenue, Suite E) on  November 6 from 6 p.m. to 8 p.m. and  November 7 from 9 a.m. to 4 p.m.  benefiting the Sacramento Public  Library. On Tuesday, November 10,  at 7:30 p.m. the Stories on Stage  series will be featuring radio  personality and UC Davis professor Dr. Andy Jones and  writer Kate Duren; the husband and wife co-authored  the book Where’s Jukie?  and will join Capital  Public Radio’s Devin  Yamanaka and KOLT  Run Creations for an  evening of reading  and performance. $5  suggested donation.  More information  can be found at  http://storieson  stagedavis.com.

—DEENA DREwiS

Bike Dog Brewery is turning 2, which calls not for a  day of celebration, but four days of celebration. The  tasting room will host a different musical  BEER act each night. There’s an opportunity to  pick up anniversary glasses and gear, and of course,  the chance to drink plenty of beer. Free, 5 p.m. each  night at 2534 Industrial Boulevard, Suite 110, in West  Sacramento; www.bikedogbrewing.com.

—DEENA DREwiS

Chasing Shadows FRiDAY, NOVEMBER 6, AND SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 7 The Chasing Shadows film series has been around  longer than many of us have been on this planet. This  year marks its 66th trip around the sun. The series’  purpose is simple: to document high-adrenaline winter sports. The intent this year is to capture those  moments of freedom and serenity that extreme  athletes experience as they pursue the highFILM est peaks and dangerous storms—all while  risking avalanches. $15-$20, 6:30 p.m. at the Crest  Theatre, 1013 K Street; www.crestsacramento.com.

—AARON CARNES

International Motorcycle Show FRiDAY, NOVEMBER 6, THROUGH SUNDAY, NOVEMBER 8 Fans of the two-wheeled vehicle unite. This year’s  motorcycle show aims to please with live racing,  stunt exhibitions, demo rides and more. Those  EXPO looking for the latest trick gadget to add to  an already wicked ride, this event caters gearheads.  $12, free for children 11 and under; 4 p.m.-8 p.m.  Friday, 9 a.m.-8 p.m. Saturday, 10 a.m.-5 p.m. Sunday  at 1600 Exposition Boulevard; www.motorcycle  shows.com.

—EDDiE JORGENSEN

Artist talk by Thomas GreyEyes MONDAY, NOVEMBER 9 Thomas GreyEyes will showcase his artwork and  talk about process. And he has a lot to say about his  work, which has served as a means to connect to  his Native American culture. He grew up in Arizona  as part of the Navajo Nation. His work explores the  cultural clashes of traditional Navajo imagery and  American imperialism, as well as powerful senART timents on racism, anti-colonialism, identity  and protest. Free, 3 p.m. at UC Davis Hart Hall,   301 Shields Avenue in Davis; http://greyeyesart.com.

—AARON CARNES

Art Mix: Color THURSDAY, NOVEMBER 12 At this month’s Art Mix attendees will have  the chance to create a group mural with San  Francisco’s Correspondence Co-op, play Twister  and take in Katie Thomas’ CMY Projection. Learn  how to salsa, and then put those moves to  ART the test with music from Simon Rowe Latin  Project and DJ Young Aundee. $10 or free with  museum admission, 5 p.m. to 9 p.m. at 216 O Street;  www.crockerartmuseum.org.

—DEENA DREwiS

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IllustratIons by Hayley DosHay

Pickleback cAribbeAn-spiced pickles, preservAtion & co. Preservation & Co. is by far one of my favorite small  businesses in Sacramento. Though owner Jason  Poole’s award-winning Bloody Mary  mix is arguably the most popular of his wares, I’m more  drawn to the pickle selection whenever I happen  to visit the warehouse.  The Caribbean-spiced  pickles ($11), for example,  are always present in  my fridge. Spiced with cinnamon, thyme and habanero  pepper, they’re perfect added  to pasta dishes, sammiches, or used as an extravagant garnish for a simple martini. 1717 19th Street,  Suite B; www.preservationandco.com.

—GArrett Mccord

Willpower killer FAllin’ oFF d’WAGon, Hook & lAdder MAnuFActurinG co. IllustratIon by Mark stIvers

Caffeine buzz by Janelle Bitker

Brewing in East Sac: Pachamama Coffee Cooperative expanded its Sacramento presence last week. The locally based, global co-op—owned by the thousands of farmers who grow its coffee—opened its first Sacramento cafe at the former site of the Cultured and the Cured (3644 J Street). Whereas the building didn’t really suit a cheese-shop-slash-restaurant, it does feel perfect for a cafe, with bar seating looking out of large windows all around. With a fresh coat of cyan blue paint, the Pachamama doesn’t adopt the typical minimalist, beige and hipster look of cafes like Temple and Insight.

location was among the most unfortunate I’ve ever seen: a stale building better suited for an office inside a desolate business park at 3453 Ramona Avenue, across from the family courthouse. Owner Cynthia Ala is looking to open somewhere with more foot traffic—a strip mall would be a huge improvement—in South Sacramento, hopefully by December. jan el l e b @ne w s re v i e w . c o m

Still, single-origin pours abound. Affogatos will be made with organic Straus ice cream. Pastries come from Sugar Plum Vegan and Freeport Bakery, and a small refrigerator holds grab-and-go vegan lunch options from the Green Boheme. There’s also beer on tap. Never heard of Pachamama? Most of its business lies in wholesale. Its main headquarters and roaster are in Midtown, but it also operates a cafe in downtown Davis. Poly food: The only Polynesian restaurant in Sacramento closed its doors over the weekend—a move for the best. Sapatu Polynesian Food’s

Charcoal-grilled: It seems fitting that an izakaya will open in the old Doughbot location (2226 10th Street), in the neighborhood that was once Sacramento’s thriving Japantown. Binchoyaki is still under construction, but its website—with sample menus— is now live. At lunch, Binchoyaki will offer plates such as miso black cod with mushrooms ($17) and flat iron steak with garlic ponzu and veggies ($20). The izakaya-style dining takes over at night. There’s a long list of charcoal-grilled skewers—chicken leg ($3.50), duck breast with wasabi ($6), potato with crème fraîche and caviar ($4)—as well as small plates, such as hamachi carpaccio ($15) and Japanesestyle fried chicken ($8). On the larger side, there’s ramen ($8) and a couple of rice bowls ($9). Ω

Every week, it seems, I vow to cut back on cocktails  and yet every night there I am again, ready to drink  the day’s stresses away. Hook  & Ladder has the perfect  remedy for this dilemma,  the aptly named Fallin’ Off  d’Wagon ($9). It’s a simple  concoction—just bourbon and an apple-ginger  shrub—with a full flavor  profile. Strong but not  bitter, slightly sweet but not  sickly so. It goes down easy.  Much easier than your week’s been so far, apparently.  Go ahead, have another. 1630 S Street, www.hookand  ladder916.com.

—rAcHel leibrock

Fresh and tan GinGer As the weather finally begins to cool, spicy warming  foods start to sound fantastic. If you’ve only tasted  ginger in soda or gingerbread, that’s not the real deal.  Look for plump, healthy fresh ginger at Asian farmers market tables. Besides adding it to stir-fries and  curries, use fresh ginger to make a soothing tea for  sore throats or upset stomachs. Magically scrape off  the razor-thin tan skin with the edge of a teaspoon,  then thinly slice and mince the fibrous root. Stir fresh  ginger into pumpkin soup or roasted eggplant. You  can even make your own ginger ale with natural fermentation to produce lively bubbles.

—Ann MArtin rolke

11.05.15    |   SN&R   |   29


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From the ashes, excellence by Ann MArtin rolke

Cielito lindo Mexican Gastronomy

Many dishes from the original menu remain, including the outstanding Mole Poblano ($15 lunch; $18 dinner). Manager Ulises Ponce told us that the mole contains 32 ingredients, 3672 J Street, (916) 736-2506, all melding into a silky sauce with incredible http://cielitolindo.us depth but no bitterness or cloying sweetness. It Lunch or dinner for one: $10 - $15 blankets moist, slow-cooked chicken and comes Good for: upscale, skillfully prepared modern Mexican food with a side of flavorful rice. Notable dishes: mole poblano, ceviche tostadas The mole is also available on enchiladas as Enmoladas de Pollo ($12 lunch; $15 dinner). We used leftover tortillas from another entree to sop up every last scrumptious bit of sauce. The Sopa Verde del Campo ($5 for a cup at Chef-owner Ramiro Alarcon opened Cielito Lindo lunch; $6 at dinner) is an unusual holdover item Mexican Gastronomy just over two years ago from the original menu. It’s a green soup of in East Sacramento. Barely seven months later, squash blossoms, cactus, spinach and purslane. the kitchen and offices were damaged by fire, Epazote lends a creaminess to this vegan dish, forcing the restaurant to close. It took more than while corn kernels and garbanzos add color and a year for Alarcon to renovate and reopen, this texture. past June. One new dish is the Sopa Azteca ($8 for a Fortunately, he had catering work to keep bowl at lunch; $9 for dinner), a take on tortilla himself and his staff busy. He also had the time soup. A very large cup came to the table halfto develop new recipes to expand the menu and filled with fresh tortilla strips, ripe avocado, procure a liquor license for beer and wine, helpancho pepper and panela cheese. When we ing to reinforce the more upscale nature ordered it, the server poured the fragrant of the operation. soup base on top to keep the flavors Housed in a former fast-food clean and fresh. The restaurant, the earlier incarnation The Triangulos Crujientes mole contains of Cielito Lindo struck some make for an outstanding 32 ingredients, all reviewers as too casual in its new appetizer ($8 lunch; decor. Now there are etched$9 dinner). These are crisp melding into a silky glass windows, expanded tostada triangles topped with sauce with incredible dining rooms and fresh bright shrimp ceviche and pico de depth but no bitterness paint on the walls. A large gallo. I’ve rarely tasted better sign with weekly specials and shrimp. or cloying attractive food photos catches We also loved the traditional sweetness. one’s eye from the outside. and popular Enfrijoladas de Pollo Alarcon worked previously at ($12 lunch; $14 dinner), with a Tequila Museo Mayahuel and opened creamy bean-and-chipotle sauce. Cielito Lindo to showcase more modern Don’t miss the celery-pineapple-parsley agua versions of Mexican classics. He also aims to fresca ($3), a super-refreshing combination. “introduce Californians to a dining experience The restaurant also thoughtfully offers three that reflects true Mexican culture and traditional children’s entrees and serves them quickly with values,” according to a bit on the restaurant’s a side of fresh fruit. website. Don’t let the casual interior confuse you. It belies Despite the building’s original purpose, this is the fine-dining quality of the service and food. Ω no fast-food taqueria. Instead, Alarcon and his staff provide exceptional service and vibrant flavors where customers might normally expect less.

HHHH


Get agri-cultured It’s a wonder why art and food don’t converge more often. At YoloArts’ eighth   annual Art Farm Gala, both Yolo County’s agricultural and artistic talents will be  up for celebration and consumption. Original paintings, ceramics and photographs will be inspired specifically  by local farmlands. Enjoy small bites from Cache  Creek Casino Resort, Kitchen428 Restaurant,  Ludy’s Main Street BBQ & Catering, Monticello Seasonal Cuisine and other chefs. Plus,  goodies from Good Humus Produce, Full Belly  Farms, Manas Ranch, Buckeye Creek Farm,  Copperhill Olive Oil and Henry’s Bullfrog Bees.  Regional wineries will pour alongside Woodland  breweries Black Dragon Brewery and Blue Note  Brewing. Art Farm takes place 6-8:30 p.m. Friday,  November 6, at the Historic Woodland Hotel,   436 Main Street. General admission tickets cost  $30 in advance, or $35 at the door, with proceeds benefiting YoloArts’ Art and Ag  project, Yolo Land Trust and Yolo Farm to Fork. More at www.yoloarts.org.

—Janelle Bitker

SN&R READERS SAVE ON CONCERT TICKETS upCOmINg Art mix @ Crocker Art museum: $10 for $2.50 Club Fantasy Admission: $20 for $8 Crest Theatre Admission: $10 for $5 Laughs unlimited: $20 for $10 powerhouse pub Admission: $15 for $3.75 The purple Ones @ Harlow’s (11/6): $15 for $7.50 martin Luther @ Harlow’s (11/10): $15 for $7.50 Fleetwood mask @ Harlow’s (11/14): $15 for $7.50 Forever Tango @ Community Center Theater (11/18) $79 for $39.50 Tainted Love @ Harlow’s (11/20 & 11/21): $15 for $7.50 Willy Wonka And The Chocolate Factory @ Crest Theatre (11/21): $10 for $5 Saved By The 90s @ Harlow’s (11/28): $12 for $6 Jim Brickman: Comfort & Joy @ Crest Theatre (11/28): $35 for $17.50 The Emerald Cup @ Sonoma County Fairgrounds (12/12-12/13): $106.49 for $69.22

NO SERVICE FEES!

Meat cancer and cheese addiction By Shoka “WHO links processed meat to   cancer—and vegetarians get smug on Twitter.” Interesting headline, CNN,  but if the World Health Organization just  determined a major part of many  people’s diet contributes to getting a  serious disease, your angle is to take  a potshot at vegetarians for their  lifestyle decisions being validated?  Check out the WHO’s Q&A on its  findings at www.who.int/features/ qa/cancer-red-meat/en, but the  gist is processed meats—anything  preserved—and red meat contain

carcinogens. Yikes. So everyone’s  favorite meat-topped pizza falls into  that category, too, but in a recent  food-addiction study reported on  by the Los Angeles Times, pizza was  found to be the most addictive: “The  more processed and fatty the food,  the more it was associated with  addictive eating behaviors.” And this  one is for the “smug vegetarians”:  because cheese contains casein (a  protein), it releases casomorphins, an  opiate. Yeah, like morphine. And now  all that’s left are smug vegans.

AND mORE... We have more great deals on concert tickets at Ace of Spades, goldfield Trading post, and Harlow’s on our website, be sure to check them out.

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Now playiNg

ReviewS

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Adoration of Dora

A song too long by Jim Carnes

Photo courtesy of resurrection theatre

“Just listen.”

Torch Song Trilogy

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8 p.m. friday, 2 p.m and 8 p.m. saturday, 2 p.m. sunday; $15-$20. resurrection theatre, 1723 25th street; (916) 223-9568; www.resurrectiontheatre.com. through november 21.

There is so much that is so good about Resurrection Theatre’s production of Torch Song Trilogy that it seems a shame to have to mention what’s not so good about it. Harvey Fierstein wrote and starred in the trilogy in stages, beginning with International Stud (Act 1) in 1978, Fugue in a Nursery (Act 2) in 1979, and Torch Song Trilogy (those two plus a concluding chapter) in 1981. Upon its debut, the final product was a groundbreaking play that sympathetically told the story of a gay, Jewish drag queen living in New York in the late 1970s and ’80s. As Arnold Beckoff, Shawn B O’Neal delivers a tour de force performance, on stage for the entire four-plus hours (yes, it’s that long). His energy never flags as he exposes the fears, scars and longings of Arnold as he navigates life. Jon Jackson credibly plays Ed, a bisexual lover uncomfortable with his lusts. As Alan, the young model and Arnold’s true love until tragedy strikes, Anthony Raddigan reveals depths below the pretty face and body. Davis High School student James Hayakawa is well-cast as David, the troubled 15-year-old whom Arnold and Alan had hoped to adopt. Except for Judith Jesness, who defines “Jewish mother” as the intolerant Mrs. Beckoff, the female roles are asides. Janey Pintar is Laurel, who cons Ed into marital not-quite bliss; and Melody Payne plays Lady Blues, a singer interjected between scenes in the first act. Lady does not sing the blues well and the character is the first thing directors Michael RJ Campbell and Sabrina Fiora should have cut to get the show in under four hours. Ω

Known for its  gutsy, provocative approach to theater,  it’s no surprise that KOLT  Run Creations’ newest  production by playwright  Lojo Simon holds nothing  back. This is the story of  Dora Maar, a pioneer in the  field of artistic photography  who becomes enamored  with painter Pablo Picasso,  and he with her, resulting  in a mad melding of art, sex  and inspiration. It’s cleverly  written and produced in a  surrealistic style, where  art, politics, sexuality and  sensuality swirl around  the story of Maar and her  struggling relationship with  her art and her lover. This  is an all-female theatrical  offering and the result is a  gutsy, avant-garde production of a thought-provoking,  though at times convoluted,  play. It’s a portrayal of  Dora, as well as her inner  self-reflection and the  catty and chatty Parisian  cafe women, the changing

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’Tis the early season Christmas is coming to Sacramento theaters early this year—really early. Two Yuletide-themed musicals start and end before Thanksgiving. White Christmas at Runaway Stage Productions and Elf: the Musical, staged by the California Musical Theatre, both run through November 15—before the holiday season really kicks off. The directors for both shows admit they wished the productions ran closer to Christmas. “Scheduling at the Sierra 2 Center does not allow flexibility for show run dates,” says White Christmas’ producing director Bob Baxter. “It’s a challenge to get audiences to attend early holiday offerings.” But Baxter looks at the bright side, saying the audiences tend to pick up in the middle of the run. “By offering such a warm and fun classic holiday show … we make the magic happen, albeit a little early in the calendar,” he says. The California Musical Theatre also faced scheduling conflicts: The Nutcracker Ballet takes over the Community Center in December. But Matt Hessburg, the show’s director of marketing, adds that while it’s still difficult to get people interested in early November, they have the advantage of a well-known and much-beloved movie-turned-show with Elf: the Musical. The show is based on Elf, the 2003 modern holiday classic starring Will Ferrell and Zooey Deschanel. “The show has generated one of the most enthusiastic responses of any show in the season—people are really excited to see it,” he says. —Patti RobeRts White christmas, 8 p.m. friday and saturday, 2 p.m. sunday; $18-$25. runaway stage Productions, sierra 2 center, 2791 24th street; (916) 207-1226; www.runawaystage.com. through november 15.

fouL

art world and a myriad  of Picasso’s mistresses  and muses. There are  some challenges in this  production that can be  smoothed out during the  run. Mostly the play itself  needs a bit more focus.  F, Sa 8pm. Through 11/14.  Sierra 2 Center, 2791 24th  Street, Classroom 10; (916)  454-1500; www.koltrun  creations.com. P.R.

5

A Doll’s House

Janis Stevens  directs this superb  adaptation (by Capital  Stage’s founding artistic  director Stephanie Gularte) of Henrik Ibsen’s  classic. Long (three acts  running to almost three  hours with two intermissions), it takes the time it  needs to tell the story of a  family’s unraveling as the  heroine begins to assemble  an authentic life. Brittni  Barger and Ryan Snyder  play the troubled couple,  with strong support from  Scott Coopwood, Elena  Wright, Chad Deverman

and Sandra Hill. Th, F 8pm; Sa 2pm and 8pm; Su 2 pm; W 7pm. Through 11/22. Capital Stage, 2215 K  Street; (916) 995-5464;   www.capstage.org. J.C.

3

Steel Magnolias

The heart of this  play by Robert  Harling is the relationship  between the six women who  meet at the local beauty  shop to pass an hour, a  day or a lifetime sharing  joys, worries and sorrows.  The camaraderie of the six  actresses in this production elevates it above its  status as a play that’s been  staged countless times. F, Sa

7:30pm; Su 2pm. Through 11/8.

$15-$25. Woodland Opera  House, 340 Second Street  in Woodland; (530) 666-9617;  www.woodlandopera  house.org. B.S.

short reviews by Jim carnes, Patti roberts and Bev sykes.

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fair

GooD

WeLL-Done

5 suBLiMe– Don’t Miss

Backwards and in high heels— and, eventually, a horn. courtesy of faLcon’s eye theatre

Horns aplenty This week, Falcon’s Eye Theatre opens the 1959 absurdist  classic Rhinoceros, by Eugene Ionesco. In a small French  village, a rhino is spotted and then the townspeople start  turning into the horned animal. Some interpret the play as  a response to the fear and conformity that accompanied  the rise of the Nazis, or the anti-communist hysteria of  the Cold War. 7:30 p.m. Friday and Saturday, 2 p.m. Sunday;  $15 general, $10 students and seniors. City Studio in the  Harris Center at Folsom Lake College, 10 College Parkway  in Folsom; (916) 608-6888; www.harriscenter.net. Through  November 22.

—Jeff Hudson

elf: the Musical, various show times, $19-$88. community center theater, 1301 L street; (916) 557-1999; www.californiamusical theatre.com/events/elf. through november 15.

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Burnt Gordon Ramsay makes it look so easy.

3

by Jim Lane

budding talents David (Sam Keeley) and Helene (Sienna Miller)—the latter a feisty single mom destined by the inexorable logic of cliché-dom (plus Burnt stars Bradley Cooper, who crops up in about Miller and Cooper’s proven chemistry in American every third movie these days. After the loathsome nadir Sniper) to strike romantic sparks with Adam. of The Hangover, his rise has been spectacular. An Meanwhile, to prove his sobriety, he pays weekly Oscar seems only a matter of time—though he may visits for blood tests and counseling to a shrink. have to wait until he’s 80 and gets one of those lifetime Steven Knight and Michael Kalesniko’s script awards that are the Academy’s way of apologizing for never really shows us why Adam is such an artist all the times you were passed over. in the kitchen, beyond a battery of montages of In Burnt, Cooper plays Adam Jones, a superstar chef him hunched over, drizzling sauce on tiny mounds who has fallen from the heights of Parisian haute cuisine of food in the center of huge white plates. Knight, to shucking oysters in a seedy New Orleans joint. The Kalesniko and director John Wells (dutiful, if uninmovie’s title refers to what Adam has done to spired) simply show Adam in abuse mode— his career, his constitution after years of screaming at underlings, throwing plates, substance abuse, the French drug dealers clearing prep tables with an angry The he stiffed, and most of his personal sweep of his arm—and expect us to and professional bridges. But not to make the connection: jackass equals filmmakers any meals—even at his worst, Adam genius. Adam may not look like expect us to make never burned one of those. a star in the kitchen, but Bradley the connection: Adam’s self-imposed penance for Cooper is one onscreen, and that’s his sins is that three-year stint at the good enough for them. jackass equals oyster bar. After shucking a million Burnt, like any good foodie genius. oysters—that works out to about 160 movie, made me hungry, but not for an hour, if you’re wondering—he decides the meals. I felt famished for more of its it’s time for a comeback, decamps to London, actresses. Emma Thompson is underused; and proceeds to re-ingratiate himself with people ditto Alicia Vikanker as Adam’s former paramour. he once screwed over. He’s able to do this through a Worse, Uma Thurman as a haughty food critic and combination of undeniable culinary genius and, in spite Lily James as David’s girlfriend are barely even of everything, personal charm. present. I wanted to tell Wells and Knight what Among these is Tony (Daniel Bruhl), the son of a Claude Rains told Humphrey Bogart in Casablanca: great restaurateur who is now, Adam says, running his “How extravagant you are throwing away women late father’s establishment into the ground. Adam talks like that. Someday they may be scarce.” Ω his way back into Tony’s kitchen, Tony is bumped back to maitre’d (he’s the greatest at that, Adam says), and the two of them embark on a quest to earn that elusive third star in the Michelin guidebook. (Will they make it, ya think?) Along the way, Adam recruits old cronies Poor Fair Good Very excellent Michel (Omar Sy) and Max (Riccardo Scamarcio) and Good

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fiLm CLiPS

BY DANIEL BARNES & JIM LANE

“A POWERFUL, IMPORTANT FILM.” Scott Mantz, Access Hollywood

2

Crimson Peak

In Buffalo, N.Y. circa 1890, a freethinking  young woman (Mia Wasikowska) is swept  off her feet by a mysterious Englishman (Tom  Hiddleston). Returning with him to his remote,  sinister estate, she is alternately haunted by  ghostly visions and tormented by his equally  mysterious sister (Jessica Chastain). Director  Guillermo del Toro (who co-wrote with Matthew  Robbins) serves up an amusing, sometimes  hilarious parody of a Victorian Gothic horror  story—think Rebecca crossed with The House  That Dripped Blood. Alas, the parody seems  to be mostly unintentional, though it’s not easy  to tell. Certainly everybody manages to keep  a straight face (God knows how). The ghostly  apparitions are like nothing ever seen outside  del Toro’s movies, and the director’s bizarre bug  fetish is once again on flagrant display. J.L.

2

Dancin’: It’s On

A Beverly Hills teen (Witney Carson)  spends a summer at her father’s Florida  hotel, where her dance moves catch the eyes  of two employees—both good dancers, but  one hot and hunky (Chehon Wespi-Tschopp),  the other dull and dweeby (Matt Marr). The  script by David A. Prior and director David  Winters limply recycles bits of Dirty Dancing,  Flashdance and other supposed classics of  the 1980s. Dance setups are contrived, but the  dances themselves are infectious fun—not  surprising, since many in the cast are alumni of  So You Think You Can Dance (U.S. and Canada  versions). Otherwise, the movie is flat-footed  and cheap. The inexperienced stars are  self-conscious and amateurish, yet oddly endearing—maybe because Winters and Prior’s  clunky lines present obstacles Meryl Streep  and Colin Firth never had to face. J.L.

3

Freeheld

A New Jersey cop (Julianne Moore), dying  of cancer, fights to secure her pension  rights for her registered domestic partner  (Ellen Page), seeking equality with heterosexual  couples. The story of Det. Laurel Hester, subject  of a 2007 Oscar-winning documentary, gets  big-movie treatment from writer Ron Nyswaner  and director Peter Sollett. The story is righteous  and Moore and Page are strong (as is Michael  Shannon as Moore’s police partner), all to the  movie’s credit. On the debit side: The script feels  too derivative of Nyswaner’s Philadelphia 22  years ago, and padded out with romance-movie  clichés—the meet-cute, the walks along the  beach at sunset, etc. Sollett sets an uncertain  tone—Steve Carell as Moore and Page’s flamboyant supporter plays almost like a Saturday  Night Live parody of gay activism. J.L.

3

Goodnight Mommy

Belgian filmmakers Severin Fiala and  Veronika Franz bring us this moody chiller, a largely silent and often grisly story of twin  brothers who come to believe that their mother  has been replaced by an impostor. Decked  in matching ratty tank tops, Elias and Lukas  (played by real-life brothers Elias and Lukas  Schwarz) while away the hours burning bugs and  romping through the fields that surround their  upscale country home, but they sense something  wrong with the heavily bandaged woman who  claims to be their mother (Susanne Wuest).  Goodnight Mommy conjures cinematic references ranging from Michael Haneke to Georges  Franju, and there are a number of powerful  images and surrealist red herrings, but the film  is more icky than creepy, with a final third that  gets a little too “torture porn”-y for my taste. At  least Fiala and Franz possess a striking vision, as  cold and severe as that country estate. D.B.

3

Goosebumps

The first big-screen adaptation of the  prolific R.L. Stine’s best-selling series  of horror stories for kids features the writer  himself—or a version of him, played by Jack  Black—who swings into action when his daughter (Odeya Rush), his new neighbor (Dylan Min-

“Who you calling draggy and self-righteous?”

2

Truth

www.SuffragetteTheMovie.com

One year after the Gary Webb biopic Kill the Messenger, here comes  another preachy, pandering, ripped-from-the-headlines story of oldguard journalists persecuted by the federal government for their doggedness,  dammit. Solemn and walnut-stained as though being fitted for a mantle, Truth  is more concerned with delivering a finger-pointing, tongue-clucking civics  lesson than with anything resembling journalism. Prolific screenwriter James  Vanderbilt makes his directorial debut with this draggy and self-righteous  look at the 2004 scandal that ended the careers of CBS anchorman Dan Rather  (Robert Redford) and producer Mary Mapes (Cate Blanchett). It’s a worn-out  cliché, but Truth feels like a screenwriter’s first film, as Vanderbilt tends to  favor windy sermons and bullet-point conversations over visual concision and  formal intellect. Vanderbilt tries to show us the TV news reporting process  from inside the fishbowl, but he doesn’t so much walk us through the world as  talk and talk and talk us through it. D.B.

nette) and the neighbor’s nerdy pal (Ryan Lee)  accidentally release the author’s monsters  from the books where they’re imprisoned,  causing them to descend like a plague on their  small Delaware town. Darren Lemke’s script  (from a story by Scott Alexander and Larry  Karaszewski) makes a clever introduction to  Stine’s books (assuming there are any young  readers out there who haven’t read any of  them yet), and Rob Letterman’s surprisingly  sprightly direction deftly walks the tightrope  between comedy and genuine scares—just the  way Stine’s books do. J.L.

1

Jem and the Holograms

A teenager (Aubrey Peeples) and her  sisters both biological (Stefanie Scott)  and foster (Aurora Perrineau, Hayley Kiyoko)  become overnight YouTube stars, catching the  eye of an unscrupulous music company executive (Juliette Lewis). Jem dolls were created in  the 1980s by Hasbro as a rival for Mattel’s Barbie and promoted with a kids’ cartoon show,  but the dolls flopped and were forgotten before  the decade was out. Still, pockets of fandom  survive, they say, and presumably these  include director John M. Chu and writer Ryan  Landels. Whatever they saw in the old series, or  the dolls, remains a mystery. The movie is trite,  cheap and shoddy, designed to be watched on  an iPhone instead of in a theater—plus, there’s  no way this assortment of bland nice-girls  would ever become superstars. Not even on  YouTube. J.L.

1

The Last Witch Hunter

A medieval warrior (Vin Diesel, in a  silly wig and beard) slays the Queen of  Witches (Julie Engelbrecht). As she dies, she  curses him with immortality; 800 years later,  he’s living in New York, clean-shaven but still  tracking down wicked witches and turning  them over to a secret society for incarceration. The answer to the inevitable who-writesthis-crap question is Cory Goodman, Matt  Sazama and Burk Sharpless, the latter two of  whom wrote last year’s equally crappy Dracula  Untold. Ineptly directed by Breck Eisner (who  would probably have a flourishing career as

ARTWORK © 2015 FOCUS FEATURES LLC. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. MOTION PICTURE © 2015 PATHE PRODUCTIONS LIMITED, CHANNEL FOUR TELEVISION CORPORATION AND THE BRITISH FILM INSTITUTE LIMITED. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

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a Starbucks barista if he weren’t the son of  ex-Disney chief Michael Eisner), the movie is  a dull mix of superstitious mumbo-jumbo and  CGI folderol. Elijah Wood, Rose Leslie, Michael  Caine and Diesel are all wasted—and so is our  time. J.L.

2

Our Brand Is Crisis

2

Rock the Kasbah

A disgraced political consultant (Sandra  Bullock) is coaxed out of forced retirement to help two colleagues (Anthony Mackie,  Ann Dowd) guide the campaign of a candidate  for president of Bolivia (Joaquim de Almeida).  Once in La Paz, she learns that the rival campaign is being advised by her old nemesis (Billy  Bob Thornton). Like Freeheld, here’s another  adaptation of a documentary—in this case, one  by Rachel Boynton—but greatly fictionalized;  for example, in the doc, Bullock’s character  was actually James Carville. Written by Peter  Straughan and directed by David Gordon  Green, the movie wears its cynicism like a  condescending badge of honor, but it makes  the fatal mistake of giving us no stake in the  outcome—no heroes to root for, no villains to  root against. Despite flashes of wit, it’s dull. J.L.

A semisleazy rock music manager  (Bill Murray) takes his only client  (Zooey Deschanel) on a USO tour of war-torn  Afghanistan. When she panics and flees the  country with his money and passport, he’s  at loose ends until he meets a good-hearted  hooker (Kate Hudson) and a Pashtun girl who  sings like an angel (Leem Lubany), whom he  decides to promote on Afghanistan’s version  of American Idol. Director Barry Levinson  gives the movie a gritty veneer of realism  and sun-baked menace, but Mitch Glazer’s  script is limp, unconvincing and vaguely  distasteful, even despicable—a facile fantasy  of stardom among honor-killing savages.  The movie presumes on our affection for  both Murray and Hudson—to say nothing of  Bruce Willis, playing yet another grim-jawed  mercenary. (Isn’t he tired of that?) False  notes abound. J.L.

11.05.15    |   SN&R   |   35


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structure. She eventually wrote her debut full-length LP, which she named appropriately Lyrics 4 The Soul, and released it in 2006. The writing of that record didn’t stop Smith from still doing live improv, however. Over the years she’s even recorded some of those sessions and uploaded them to YouTube. Improv, Smith says now, has made her more comfortable as a singer. “It took me a long time to structure is overrated anyway. even embrace that and even believe that in myself. I [was] The name “Miss Mouthpeace” wasn’t something just trying to be what fits,” she says. “Once I that local soul singer Monique Smith thought to discovered that I didn’t have to be what other call herself. It came to her in an unexpected way. people thought anymore, that’s when my lyrics Smith was singing at an open-mic in Okinawa, became more free.” Japan, and a drunk woman approached her These days her shows encompass the singer’s afterword to tell her she had intended to go home many sides. The musicality is diverse in terms of and end her life after the show, but something in style (soul, jazz, R&B, reggae) as Smith performs Smith’s lyrics changed her mind. originals, covers and improvised jams. There are You are definitely a mouthpiece, the woman also bits of comedy and audience interaction with said. That stuck with Smith. a game that Smith calls “Let’s Write a Song.” Smith’s not even sure what lyrics impacted the “The crowd and I, we write a song together,” woman—she had been improvising—but the Smith says. “I call people out. I’ll say, ‘I see timing was significant. She’d wanted a someone that looks like Billie Holiday or stage name, and she couldn’t stop Michael Jackson … come up here and thinking about what the woman sing.’” said. Eventually, she changed Usually their reaction is one the spelling to Mouthpeace. of surprise and skepticism, This was in 2002. She Smith says. had been singing her entire “They always give me this life but in Japan, where look like ‘Girl, I’m going to she moved to be with her get you,’” she says. “They do it military husband, had just though. It’s so much fun.” started taking it more seriMonique Smith, a.k.a. Smith has also released ously. Smith had just started about a dozen singles. That pain Miss Mouthpeace this particular open-mic, which Smith felt in Okinawa continued singer-songwriter she called Lyrics 4 The Soul. She to escalate, and by the time she’d wasn’t big on structure; the singer finished the LP, Smith was going and her band just went for it, whatever through a divorce. came out came out. With the newer material, Smith says she’s Smith remembers it as a tumultuous but focused on healing. creatively fulfilling time. “I sing a lot about self-love. Everything is an “It was a rough area in my personal life, so uplifting story,” Smith says. “I might crack a joke everything that I was singing was really from a or two about an ex-boyfriend or something, but place of hurt,” Smith says. “What I discovered even in that, I don’t make it about him. I make it was, I could sing from the top of my head. My about me. I make it about my choice.” Ω band was like a jam band. I would do spoken word, but it was singing.” Check out Miss Mouthpeace at 8 p.m. Saturday, November 7, at Shine, By 2004, she’d landed back home in 1400 E Street. Tickets are $10. Learn more at www.missmouthpeacemusic.com. Sacramento where she decided to take a stab at

“Everything is an uplifting story.”

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SouNd advice

No hype man needed This is Halloween: TBD Fest Bleepy Hollow. Welcome to the warehouse. Cavernous, chilly, with demonic horse-head art fixtures, strobe light photo ops and a cocktail bar that spanned halfway across the eastern wall of downtown Sacramento’s Hanger Studios. As with September’s festival, TBD provides the atmosphere; it’s up to the concertgoers to make the experience special. Attendees delivered on the costume front. Beyond the Halloween clichés—drunken bananas and bro’d-out referees—the results were varied. I was smitten by a jelly fish gyrating under a repurposed transparent umbrella. A nearby Aztec warrior god impressed, feathers arched over his back. A gaggle of gossipy Martians assessed the crowd. The ramp on the building’s west end opened up to an outdoor live music venue. Oak Park Brewing Co. loosened the crowd with its makeshift biergarten. The bleepy tunes commenced. Slow Magic proved to be tribal catharsis. Face obscured by a flashing fake visage that looked how the Donnie Darko rabbit might appear while wearing Majora’s Mask, the nebulous cult favorite bounced, flailed, ripped into his drums. Perhaps taking the hint that this was a neighborhood, for chrissakes, Com Truise brought it down a notch with his trademark synth-heavy ’80s style. The sea of costumed 20-somethings responded well to the shift, but I wondered if the evening’s sets were backward. Slow Magic prepared us for war. Com Truise gave us a hug. Between sets, a bald young man in a T-shirt took to the stage to scream and wave to the crowd. “Sacramento!” he yelled. “Sacramento, are we family?!” The room delivered a polite response, but the moment felt off. “It’s sad that Sacramento needs a hype man,” lamented an angel in the

crowd to her lion partner. She’s right, but it feels like we’re almost there. We’ve reached the critical mass to make a music experience like this worth hosting. It’s up to us to make it special. Good on the TBD folks for keeping our feet moving, for maintaining that creative urgency bubbling under Sacramento’s tempered veneer. Or, for trying, at least.

She’s got soul: As her band the Dap-Kings launched into “New Shoes,” Sharon Jones strutted onto the Mondavi Center stage sporting eye-catching, shiny silver heels. When the song ended, she promptly took them off. The 59-year-old’s story was already plenty remarkable: a former prison guard discovered in her 40s— nearly two decades later, a Grammywinning vocalist at the forefront of the ’60s soul revivalist movement. Now, she’s touring in support of her brand new holiday album, It’s a Holiday Soul Party, despite her recent diagnosis of stage two pancreatic cancer. As Jones switched to more reasonable flats, she reminded the audience of that diagnosis—just in case they weren’t already aware—and how her feet are more tender, and how her skin has darkened in some places, and how there might be some notes she can’t quite hit like she used to. A collective, audible sound of pity could not be helped, to which Jones shook her head. “I’ve got to live it,” she said. “But only for four more months. That’s what I say.” What unfolded was a sassy, passionate and triumphant performance. The inspiring Jones sounded in perfect, powerful form and demonstrated several old-school, full-throttle dance moves. She teased the polite crowd for generally staying in those comfortable Mondavi seats and brought a few folks onstage for a joyous soul party. She brought up her cancer over and over—this show was her declaration to the universe that Miss Sharon Jones would transcend expectations and never sit silent. She recalled the release of “Get Up and Get Out,” off the Grammynominated 2014 album Give the People What they Want, and how that coincided with her diagnosis. Though the song was initially supposed to be directed at a romantic interest, she found new meaning in its lyrics. “I said, ‘Cancer, you get up and you get out,’” she said, looking positively fiery. “I’m not gonna let it get me down. I gotta fight it.” —Janelle BitKer jan el l e b @ne w s re v i e w . c o m

—Dave Kempa

11.05.15    |   SN&R   |   37


F%$# Cancer

Dru Down

The Blue lamp, 8 p.m., $5

He Whose Ox is Gored

Blue lamp, 8 p.m., $20

The Moans (pictured), Pug Skullz, City of  Vain and the Strange Party perform on day  two of Danny Secretion’s Lame Ass Birthday  Party. The four-night affair, known as the  F%$# Cancer benefit, hosts dozens  PUNK of bands at a handful of venues with  all benefits donated to the American Cancer  Society. Look for night three at Old Ironsides,  followed by night four at the Colonial Theatre  Complex, but not before joining the punks  at the Blue Lamp to celebrate Secretion’s  annual fundraising event as he performs in  The Moans. Wish him a happy birthday, too,  because raising money for cancer patients is  anything but lame. 1400 Alhambra Boulevard,  www.facebook.com/themoans.

Cafe Colonial, 8 p.m., $8

Oakland’s Dru Down pioneered the ’90s  sound in the Bay Area with his mackadelic  style and hit single “Pimp of the Year.”  Down with legends like the Luniz, E-40 and  Tupac Shakur, Dru Down made a name  for himself on the independent success  of Explicit Game in 1994 and Can You Feel  Me in 1996. He appeared on Tupac’s single  “It’s All About You” and has released nine  albums, including Chronicles of a Pimp  in 2010. A true original who  HIP-HOP was sporting locks before Kat  Williams, Dru Down’s catalog defined the  Bay alongside Rappin 4 Tay and Mac Dre.  1400 Alhambra Blvd, www.facebook.com/ Dru-Down-106166169475080.

—STeph RodRiguez

06 FRI

photo by amy billharz

06 FRI

photo by Sonny Gill

05 T HU

07 SAT

A Tribe Called Red Sol ColleCTive, 3 p.m., $25

There’s a lot going on with the music of  He Whose Ox is Gored, a Seattle band that  melds sludge, prog, shoegaze and more  into a dreamy headtrip. They’ve got a new  album out, The Camel, The Lion,  SLUDGE The Child, and they’re coming  to town to show it off with local crushers  (waning), which also has very real cred  in the “too diverse and groundbreaking  to be any one genre” category. Fresno’s  Beastmaker is also on the bill. If you need  it heavy and heady, then come on through.  3520 Stockton Boulevard, www.facebook. com/events/717474905025018.

—anThony Siino

First of all, do not wear a headdress or war  paint to this show. A Tribe Called Red is not  a fan of cultural appropriation. The band is  perhaps as well known for its activism as  its unique dance music, mixing traditional  pow wow vocal chanting and drumming with  dubstep. Throw in a little hip-hop, reggae and  thumping bass, and you’ve got a wild, Tribecertified dance party. Hailing from Ottawa,  Canada, the three-deejay crew headlines  Sol X, the 10-year anniversary party for Sol  Collective. World Hood, SETI  ELECTRONIC X, Tel Cairo and other artists  will perform as well, alongside a full day of  community art workshops. 2574 21st Street,  http://atribecalledred.com.

—Blake gilleSpie

—Janelle BiTkeR

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11 WED

12 T HU

12 T HU

Jeff Daniels

Pimps of Joytime

John 5

San Francisco Symphony

Harlow’s restaurant & nigHtclub, 7 p.m., $35-$40 Jeff Daniels is best known for his brave  performance as Harry Dunne in Dumb and  Dumber and in more recent years, as the  lightning-lipped mansplainer Will McAvoy in  The Newsroom. This week, he comes  BLUES to us as band leader backed by his  son and the Ben Daniels Band. While the elder  Daniels’ music is insistent in its Americananess (banjos galore, lots of droppin’ the “g”  from the end of words), the younger tends  more toward contemporary sound à la  Jackie Green or Old Crow Medicine Show.  Expect a blend of the two as father and son  ramble on through a cross-country tour.  2708 J Street, www.jeffdaniels.com.

—Deena Drewis

Harlow’s restaurant & nigHtclub, 7 p.m., $15-$18 The reemergence of soul music in recent  years has generally evoked something  between Motown pop and James Brown funk.  But the soul groups back in the ’70s were  very eclectic. (Ever listen to a Parliament  Funkadelic record in its entirety?) Pimps  of Joytime is a soul band in this tradition.  The music grooves hard, but varies drastically from song to song. There are light,  early-Prince-esque jams, heavy bluesy funk,  psychedelic soul and even a bit of EDMinfluenced dance tunes. In other words, it  runs the gamut. The latest record,  SoUL Jukestone Paradise, is an excellent  showcase of the band’s chops and diversity.  2708 J Street, www.harlows.com.

Ball

monDavi center, 8 p.m., $67-$145

Fans of Marilyn Manson and John 5’s  current band, Rob Zombie, need no introduction to one of the most innovative  guitarists to ever take over mainstream  rock radio. For the uninitiated, John 5,  a.k.a. John William Lowery, has worked with  some of the biggest names in the industry,  including such disparate artists as  RoCK k.d. Lang, Garbage, Meat Loaf, Ozzy  Osbourne, Slash and Lynyrd Skynyrd. His  most recent offering, Careful with That Axe,  finds Lowery showcasing his skill at playing  multiple genres of music like country, rock,  jazz, classical and more. 9426 Greenback  Lane, www.facebook.com/John5official.

—eDDie Jorgensen

Bay Area classical fans have been spoiled for  over two decades with renowned director  Michael Tilson Thomas performCLASSICAL ing in their backyard. In the  classical world, he is a household name who  regularly performs at Davies Symphony Hall  and draws capacity crowds. Thomas has been  featured on numerous recordings on RCA Red  Seal, among others. Whether or not you’re  a fan of Jean Sibelius or Robert Schumann’s  works makes little difference as MTT’s mere  presence will command your attention. Violinist  Leonidas Kavakos joins him for what could be  one of the greatest performances of the 2015  season. Bravo, Mondavi! 1 Shields Avenue in  Davis, http://michaeltilsonthomas.com.

—eDDie Jorgensen

20 15

—aaron carnes

tHe boarDwalk, 7 p.m., $18

photo by art streiber

11 SAT

11.05.15    |   SN&R   |   39


BADLANDS

2003 K St., (916) 448-8790

THURSDAY 11/5

FRIDAY 11/6

#TBT and 5 Card Stud with throwback video requests, 8pm, call for cover

Fabulous and Gay Fridays, 9pm, call for cover

Spectacular Saturdays, 8pm, call for cover

CHRISTIAN DEWILD, 9pm, no cover

SPARE PARTS, 9:30pm, call for cover

DRU DOWN, 8pm, call for the cover

Producer spotlight with PROP THE PRODUCER, 8pm, call for cover

SWINGIN’ UTTERS, THE BOMBPOPS, SUCCESS; 8pm, $13.50

ELEMENT BRASS BAND, J ROSS PARELLI; Tu 8pm; BRADY HAZE, FADE; W 8pm

RIOTMAKER, THEY WANT GHOST, TWO PEACE, ONE SHARP MIND; 7pm, $10-$12

DARKEST HOUR, DEAD TO FALL, ASS LIFE, WITHOUT HOPE; 6:30pm, $15-$17

ICE NINE KILLS, WAGE WAR, MY ENEMIES & I, WHITE NOISE; 6pm, $13-$15

OUR LAST NIGHT, PALISADES, HAIL THE SUN, PICTURESQUE; 6:30pm W, $14-$16

Children for Children Showcase of Hope, 7:30pm, $24

DAVE SIMONETT, THE EASY LEAVES; 7:30pm, $17-$20

BAR 101 List your event!

Post your free online listing (up to 15 months early), and our editors will consider your submission for the printed calendar as well. Print listings are also free, but subject to space limitations. Online, you can include a full description of your event, a photo, and a link to your website. Go to www.newsreview.com/calendar and start posting events. Deadline for print listings is 10 days prior to the issue in which you wish the listing to appear.

101 Main St., Roseville; (916) 774-0505

BLUE LAMP

1400 Alhambra, (916) 455-3400

THE BOARDWALK

9426 Greenback Ln., Orangevale; (916) 988-9247

CENTER FOR THE ARTS

314 W. Main St., Grass Valley; (530) 274-8384

COUNTRY CLUB SALOON

SUNDAY 11/8 Sunday Tea Dance and Beer Bust, 4-8pm, call for cover

BARNYARD STOMPERS, 9pm, call for cover

Open-mic, 7:30pm, no cover

DISTRICT 30

Pete Tong, 10pm, $10-$20

FACES

Everything Happens karaoke, dance and swim; 9pm-2am, no cover

Absolut Fridays dance party, 9pm, $5-$10

Party Time with Sequin Saturdays Drag Show, 9pm, $5-$12

FOX & GOOSE

MARTY COHEN AND THE SIDEKICKS, 8pm, no cover

DAPHNE LEE MARTIN AND FRANCIS LAMBARDI, JON EMERY; 9pm, $5

KEVIN SECONDS, NOAH NELSON, BOB EASTON-WALLER; 9pm, $5

594 Main St., Placerville; (530) 642-8481

1001 R St., (916) 443-8825

DJDM, 10pm, call for cover

Caked Up, 10pm W, $7.50

GOLDFIELD TRADING POST

CHRIS GARDNER, 9pm, $5

HALFTIME BAR & GRILL

Karaoke, 9pm, no cover

THE TONE MONKEYS, 9pm, $5

THE PURPLE ONES Prince tribute, 9pm, $15-$18

JEFF DANIELS, 7pm, $35-40; SOME FEAR NONE, 10pm, $10-$12

1603 J St., (916) 476-5076

5681 Lonetree Blvd., Rocklin; (916) 626-6366

HARLOW’S

DIEGO’S UMBRELLA, 9pm, $12-$15

THE HIDEAWAY BAR & GRILL

Trash Rock Thursdays, 9pm, no cover

LUNA’S CAFE & JUICE BAR

Joe Montoya’s Poetry Unplugged, 8pm, $2

2708 J St., (916) 441-4693 2565 Franklin Blvd., (916) 455-1331 1414 16th St., (916) 441-3931

MIDTOWN BARFLY

1119 21st St., (916) 549-2779

Sunday Mass with heated pool, drag show, 2pm, no cover

Open mic, M, no cover; Tacos and Trivia, 7pm Tu, no cover Trivia night, 7:30pm Tu; Bingo, 1pm W; Paint Nite, 7pm W, $25 IN THE VALLEY BELOW, HANDSOME GHOST; 7pm, $13-$15

CRAIG WAYNE BOYD, 7pm M; MARTIN LUTHER, 9pm Tu; PIMPS OF JOYTIME, W

Sunday Sinema, 8pm, call for cover

Record Club, M; Cactus Pete’s 78 RPM Record Roundup, 8pm Tu Nebraska Mondays, 7:30pm M; Open-mic comedy, 8pm Tu

Ascension with Lumberjvck, Snafu, Arkilla; 10pm, $5-$10

Midtown Moxies Burlesque one-year anniversary; 8pm, $15-$20

UPCOMING EVENTS

BIRTHDAY BASH WEEKEND!! $5 COVER

FRIDAY NOV. 6

FREE PRIME RIB DINNER 7-8PM .50 CENT BEER SPECIAL AND $2 JACK N COKES 7-9PM FREE LATE NIGHT PIZZA AFTER MIDNIGHT

SATURDAY NOV.7

FREE SLOW ROASTED TRI TIP DINNER 7-8PM .50 CENT BEER SPECIAL AND $2 JACK N COKES 7-9PM FREE LATE NIGHT BBQ BRISKET & RIBS AFTER MIDNIGHT DONT MISS OUR

KNCI COLLEGE NIGHT

18 & OVER WEDNESDAY 'S OR COLLEGE NIGHT SUNDAYS KARAOKE WED-SUNDAY IN THE FRONT BAR

FREE DANCE LESSONS NIGHTLY

1320 DEL PASO BLVD

STONEYINN.COM | 916.927.6023 |

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11.05.15

EDM and karaoke, 9pm M, no cover; Latin night, 9pm Tu, $5 Open-mic, 7:30pm M; Pub quiz, 7pm Tu; All Vinyl Wednesdays, 6pm W, no cover

STONEY'S 8 ANNUAL

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MONDAY-WEDNESDAY 11/9-11/11 Big Mondays happy hour all night, M; Karaoke, Tu; Trapicana, W, call for cover Trivia Night, 6:30pm M, no cover; Open-mic night, 7:30pm W, no cover

THE COZMIC CAFE

2000 K St., (916) 448-7798

Hey local bands!

BOB WOODS AND STOMPBILLY, 5pm; OLD TOWN BOYZ, 9pm, call for cover

4007 Taylor Rd., Loomis; (916) 652-4007

1016 K St., (916) 737-5770

Want to be a hot show? Mail photos to Calendar Editor, SN&R, 1124 Del Paso Blvd., Sacramento, CA 95815 or email it to sactocalendar@ newsreview.com. Be sure to include date, time, location and cost of upcoming shows.

F%$# Cancer with CITY OF VAIN, THE MOANS, PUG SKULLZ; 8pm, $5

SATURDAY 11/7

Salsa Wednesday, 7:30pm W, $5


THURSDAY 11/5

FRIDAY 11/6

SATURDAY 11/7

NAKED LOUNGE DOWNTOWN

THE STOLEN ELK, FURSHITZEN GIGGLES, LOB INSTAGON; 8:30pm, $5

DANIEL ANTHONY, POLYORCHIDS, STEVE KOTAREK BAND; 8:30pm, $5

TARA AND EMILIE, SHOI, TAO TIRIKI; 8:30pm, $5

Jazz session with Naked Lounge Quintet, M, no cover; GUS GARVIN, 8:30pm W

OLD IRONSIDES

Karaoke, 9pm, no cover

F%$# Cancer with BRIGHT FACES, CAPTAIN 9’s, THE COMMUNITY; $10

Lipstick, 9pm, $5

Guest chefs serve $5 plates, M; Karaoke, 9pm Tu; Open-mic, 9pm W

ON THE Y

Open mic stand-up comedy and karaoke, 8pm, no cover TERRY EVANS, 8pm, $20

ACHILLES WHEEL, 8pm, $15

1111 H St., (916) 443-1927

1901 10th St., (916) 442-3504 670 Fulton Ave., (916) 487-3731

THE PALMS PLAYHOUSE

13 Main St., Winters; (530) 795-1825

SUNDAY 11/8

MONDAY-WEDNESDAY 11/9-11/11

PISTOL PETE’S

Karaoke, 9pm Tu, W, no cover

140 Harrison Ave., Auburn; (530) 885-5093

POWERHOUSE PUB

BLACKWATER, 10pm, call for cover

THE PRESS CLUB

Bottom 40 dance party, 9pm, no cover

614 Sutter St., Folsom; (916) 355-8586 2030 P St., (916) 444-7914

WONDERBREAD 5, 10pm, $15

ARDEN PARK ROOTS, 10pm, $10

RED’S BLUES, 3pm, $10

Live band karaoke, 8pm Tu, call for cover; Local Licks, 8pm W

Pop 40 dance party, 9pm, $5

Sunday night dance party, 9pm, no cover

EUGENE UGLY, PANDOVAL; 8pm M; Youth Cult dance party, 9 pm Tu

Christian DeWild 9pm Friday. No cover. Bar 101 Blues rock

SHADY LADY SALOON 1409 R St., (916) 231-9121

SOPHIA’S THAI KITCHEN 129 E St., Davis; (530) 758-4333

STARLITE LOUNGE

WILDCARD, RIOT CRAIG; 8pm, call for cover

FIFI, GYMBOYZ; 8pm, call for cover

SOL PELIGRO, DE’ANZA, CORASOL; 8pm, call for cover

KING MAGNETIC, 8pm, call for cover

STONEY’S ROCKIN RODEO

Country dancing with DJ Patrick, 9:30pm, no cover

Stoney’s 8th anniversary party, 7pm, $5-$10

Stoney’s 8th anniversary party, 8pm, $5

Country DJ dancing and karaoke, 9pm, no cover

Country DJ dancing, 9:30pm W, $5-$10

TORCH CLUB

X TRIO, 5pm, no cover; MOJO GREEN, call for time and cover

PAILER AND FRATIS, 5:30pm, no cover; DENNIS JONES BAND, call for time

GROOVE SESSION, call for time and cover

Blues Jam, 4pm-7pm, no cover; Front the Band karaoke, 8pm, no cover

STACIE EAKES AND THE SUPERFREAKES, 9pm W, no cover

1517 21st St., (916) 704-0711 1320 Del Paso Blvd., (916) 927-6023 904 15th St., (916) 443-2797

All ages, all the time ACE OF SPADES

MAYDAY PARADE, 5:30pm Tu, $24; Poly Tape II Tour, 7pm W, $20-$22

1417 R St., (916) 448-3300

THE COLONY

3512 Stockton Blvd., (916) 718-7055

SHINE

Jazz jam with Jason Galbraith, 8pm, no cover

1400 E St., (916) 551-1400

Every nfl gameday

2 $ 00 7 $ 00 4 $ 00 4 $ 50

Bud Lt & Coors Pints Pitchers Sierra Nevada Pale Ale Pints Jameson, Muerto, Smirnoff

NFL Sunday Ticket 6 TV's "Between the Bunns" Serving Grub Every Game 916.652.4007 4007 Taylor Road, Loomis, CA countryclubsaloon.com

SONDER, URD-OM, PISSCAT, DEATH ROGEN, KHAOS ASSAULT; 8pm, $4-$7

F%$# Cancer with CRUDE STUDS, RED DEVIL LIE, HYBRID CREEPS; $20

ALL ABOUT ROCKETS, L’ANARCHISTE; 7pm, $6

MISS MOUTHPEACE, DARYL BLACK; 7pm, $10

Ice Nine Kills with Wage War, My Enemies & I and White Noise 6pm Sunday, $13-$15. The Boardwalk Metalcore

2708 J Street Sacramento, CA 916.441.4693 www.harlows.com COMING SOON

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IN THE VALLEY BELOW HANDSOME GHOST (ALL AGES)

11/9 5:30PM $15ADV

CRAIG WAYNE BOYD ROEM BAUR 11/7 5:30PM $35ADV

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SOME FEAR NONE “UNPLUGGED” ACOUSTIC SHOW MICHAEL WOODRUFF AND KERY GLENNON (FROM THE ALPHA COMPLEX)

11/11 7PM $15ADV

PIMPS OF JOYTIME CON BRIO

11/14 11/14 11/15 11/18 11/20 11/21 11/22 11/24 11/25 11/27 11/28 11/28 11/30 12/02 12/03 12/4 12/5 12/7 12/8 12/11

Gardens & Villa Fleetwood Mask Eric Bellinger Kool Keith Tainted Love Tainted Love Sevyn Streeter Guttermouth Nikki Lane Two Gallants Epsilona Saved by the 90s The Royal Concept / Parade of Lights

The Subdudes !!! (Chk Chk Chk) Chris Robinson Brotherhood Goapele The Dandy Warhols The 1 Guy Tommy Castro

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ALLE Y K AT Z PRESENTS

The Center for the Arts presents

“Sedaris ain’t the preeminent humorist of his generation by accident.” - Entertainment Weekly

DAVID SEDARIS A Reading and Book Signing with Best-selling Author & Humorist VETERANS MEMORIAL AUDITORIUM – GRASS VALLEY 255 South Auburn Street, Grass Valley, CA

BOTH LOCATIONS

SAT. NOV 14 | 6PM

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2019 O STREET MIDTOWN 916.442.2682

7942 ARCADIA DRIVE CITRUS HEIGHTS 916.722.2682

Tuesday, November 17, 7:30pm The Center Box Office – 530.274.8384 314 W. Main St, Grass Valley, CA Tickets also at the BriarPatch Co-op – 530.272.5333

www.thecenterforthearts.org


Print ads start at $6/wk. www.newsreview.com or (916) 498-1234 ext. 5 Phone hours: M-F 9am-5pm. All ads post online same day. Deadlines for print: Line ad deadline: Monday 4pm Adult line ad deadline: Monday 4pm Display ad deadline: Friday 2pm

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FREE!*

*Nominal fee for adult entertainment. All advertising is subject to the newspaper’s Standards of Acceptance. Further, the News & Review specifically reserves the right to edit, decline or properly classify any ad. Errors will be rectified by re-publication upon notification. The N&R is not responsible for error after the first publication. The N&R assumes no financial liability for errors or omission of copy. In any event, liability shall not exceed the cost of the space occupied by such an error or omission. The advertiser and not the newspaper assumes full responsibility for the truthful content of their advertising message.

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learn discernment, that ongoing process of wisely turning toward goodness and love. Discernment is mindfulness that aligns our actions with the deep yearning of our soul. Yes, that means you can choose to deepen your friendship with the guy you’ve been seeing. Or you can make a decision to be exclusive and have “a thing.” The key is for you to observe your decision-making process, and consciously tweak it until you Yes, your son’s various girlfriends are feel more clarity and confidence. As you smarter than you think. They figure out, do, you will grow in self-awareness. That before he does, that the relationship is not means you will make future decisions with viable, and they move on. I’d say these greater insight and understanding. young women are beautiful, kind and One last thing, your decision will be possess an emotional intelligence that your easier with more information. Over the son is missing. Do you intervene next few weeks when your schedin his life often? If so, could ule permits, spend quality that well-meaning help be time with this guy. Doing Your the reason he has not yet so will reveal whether son’s various developed realistic ideas he is right for you. You about relationships? girlfriends are will also discover his Sometimes letting attitude toward your smarter than you think. someone we love fail full schedule, and the They figure out, before is the greatest gift we relationship’s ranking can give. It shows we he does, that the on your list of prioritrust their capacity to ties. He could be busy relationship is not solve problems and to ask himself, or just accepting viable. for help when needed. of your schedule. It’s also possible that you will begin to enjoy the relationship so much that How do I decide if I like a guy enough creating additional time for him in your to be in a relationship with him? We’re in high school and we’ve been talking for calendar becomes a high priority. Ω a while. We’ve hung out, he asked me to homecoming and it was fun. I know he likes me a lot. He wants to be a thing, but I don’t MedITATIon of THe Week know if I’m ready. My parents and friends “However you dress, wherever like him and are pressuring me to be with you go, yes means yes and him, but I feel like I have so much going on no means no.” So goes an already with school, volleyball and work (I anonymous quip meant to work part-time, weekends). I’m not sure I inspire conversation about have time for a relationship. How will I know consent. Ready? Let’s talk what to do? Notice the smart choices you have already made: Aware that a relationship demands time and attention, you have carefully assessed your commitments. You know that you like this guy, but are unsure whether you want more than friendship. You didn’t bow to peer pressure, but are thoughtfully considering your friends’ opinions. You aren’t allowing your parents to force you into a relationship, either. So, what’s the problem? There isn’t one, actually. After all, you’re not procrastinating; you’re engaged in discernment. The question you are wrestling with— to date or not to date—is an opportunity, not a crisis. The universe is inviting you to

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Write, email or leave a message for Joey at the News & Review. Give your name, telephone number (for verification purposes only) and question—all correspondence will be kept strictly confidential. Write Joey, 1124 Del Paso Boulevard, Sacramento, CA 95815; call (916) 498-1234, ext. 3206; or email askjoey@newsreview.com.

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Whatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s inside: The 420 49 Review 56 Capital Cannabis Map 60

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Find dispensary listings online at newsreview.com/sacramento


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10 (million) sack

Bring in any competitor’s coupon* and we’ll beat it by $5 *That is CA Medical Board Standards Compliant. Must present competitor’s ad. Some restrictions apply.

Why do some strains make me paranoid and anxiety-ridden and some strains don’t? —LFM Good question. The short answer: No one really knows. We do know that the amygdala, the part of the brain that controls anxiety and fear, contains cannabis receptors and produces its own set of endocannabinoids. That’s right. You create your own form of cannabis just by being human. Anyway, it’s generally the THC in cannabis that can make you feel self-conscious and weird. Try to avoid anything with a super-high THC content, and maybe look for a strain that has a good amount of CBD. CBD has been shown to help with anxiety. Or just don’t use cannabis. I’m kidding. Smoke weed every day. Still kidding. Be yourself.

Smoke weed every day.

VOTED BEST 420 PHYSICIAN IN SAC! ’15

Is California going to legalize cannabis or what?

—Jimmy Who knows? Last time I checked, there were three, maybe four groups working to get something on the ballot, but they all seem a little disorganized and underfunded. That may change this week, as Facebook billionaire Sean Parker has announced a plan to put an initiative on the ballot. Early reports say the new initiative will allow anyone over the age of 21 to grow up to six plants and possess up to an ounce. There would be a 15 percent retail tax and an excise tax (just under 10 bucks an ounce for flowers, and just under 3 bucks for shake) on wholesalers. Plus a $10 million fund for marijuana research, and a fund to help the CHP find better ways to tell if a driver is too high to drive. Parker seems to have the backing of the Drug Policy Alliance and the dude from Weedmaps. I am all for legalization, and this new effort looks like it will have a chance. The challenge will be to convince all of the people in the marijuana industry that this new law is better than the way we are doing it now. As it stands now, for the low price of $60 a year (about what it costs to renew your doctor’s recommendation), you can grow and smoke and buy and eat and cook just about all the marijuana you could want. Is this new law better than that? Will this campaign be able to convince the squares that regulation is better than prohibition? I suppose we’ll find out in about a year. What’s good this harvest season? —Kronis Sure All of it. It’s all good. I was just up in Southern Oregon and the flavors are poppin’! I tried some Afghan Kush (awesome), some “Yayger” (it used to be “Jager” but some growers received a cease-and-desist letter from the Jagermeister LawyerMeisters) and a strain from Rogue Bud Farms called “Omega” that was all sweetness and fruit and strong nonparanoid deliciousness. I am headed out to the Humboldt Hemp Fest next week and I look forward to trying all the cannabis grown by every grower ever. You should come visit. Ω

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Ngaio Bealum is a Sacramento comedian, activist and marijuana expert. Email him questions at ask420@newsreview.com.

www.420MD.org 11.05.15    |   SN&R   |   49


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FRee will aStRology

by EddiE JorgEnsEn

by rob brEzsny

FOR THE WEEK OF NOVEMBER 5, 2015 ARIES (March 21-April 19): In 1978, Ben Cohen

and Jerry Greenfield began selling their new ice cream out of a refurbished gas station in Burlington, Vt. Thirty-seven years later, Ben & Jerry’s is among the world’s best-selling ice cream brands. Its success stems in part from its willingness to keep transforming the way it does business. “My mantra is ‘Change is a wonderful thing,’” says the current CEO. As evidence of the company’s intention to keep re-evaluating its approach, there’s a “Flavor Graveyard” on its website, where it lists flavors it has tried to sell but ultimately abandoned. “Wavy Gravy,” “Tennessee Mud” and “Turtle Soup” are among the departed. Now is a favorable time for you to engage in a purge of your own, Aries. What parts of your life don’t work any more? What personal changes would be wonderful things?

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): Before he helped

launch Apple Computer in the 1970s, tech pioneer Steve Wozniak ran a dial-a-joke service. Most of the time, people who called got an automated recording, but now and then Wozniak answered himself. That’s how he met Alice Robertson, the woman who later became his wife. I’m guessing you will have comparable experiences in the coming weeks, Taurus. Future allies may come into your life in unexpected ways. It’s as if mysterious forces will be conspiring to connect you with people you need to know.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Small, nondestructive

earthquakes are common. Our planet has an average of 1,400 of them every day. This subtle underground mayhem has been going on steadily for millions of years. According to recent research, it has been responsible for creating 80 percent of the world’s gold. I suspect that the next six or seven months will feature a metaphorically analogous process in your life. You will experience deep-seated quivering and grinding that won’t bring major disruptions even as it generates the equivalent of gold deposits. Make it your goal to welcome and even thrive on the subterranean friction!

CANCER (June 21-July 22): Here’s the process

I went through to create your horoscope. First I drew up a chart of your astrological aspects. Using my analytical skills, I pondered their meaning. Next, I called on my intuitive powers, asking my unconscious mind to provide symbols that would be useful to you. The response I got from my deeper mind was surprising: It informed me that I should go to a new cafe that had just opened downtown. Ten minutes later, I was there, gazing at a menu packed with exotic treats: Banana Flirty Milk … Champagne Coconut Mango Slushy … Honey Dew Jelly Juice … Creamy Wild Berry Blitz … Sweet Dreamy Ginger Snow. I suspect these are metaphors for experiences that are coming your way.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): The Beatles’ song “You

Never Give Me Your Money” has this poignant lyric: “Oh, that magic feeling / nowhere to go.” I suggest you make it your motto for now. And if you have not yet begun to feel the allure of that sentiment, initiate the necessary shifts to get yourself in the mood. Why? Because it’s time to recharge your spiritual battery, and the best way to do that is to immerse yourself in the mystery of having nothing to do and nowhere to go. Put your faith in the pregnant silence, Leo. Let emptiness teach you what you need to know next.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Should a professional

singer be criticized for her lack of skill in laying bricks? Is it reasonable to chide a kindergarten teacher for his ineptitude as an airplane pilot? Does it make sense to complain about a cat’s inability to bark? Of course not. There are many other unwarranted comparisons that are almost as irrational but not as obviously unfair. Is it right for you to wish your current lover or best friend could have the same je ne sais quoi as a previous lover or best friend? Should you try to manipulate the future so that it’s more like the past? Are you justified in demanding that your head and your heart come to identical conclusions? No, no and no. Allow the differences to be differences. And more than that: Celebrate them!

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): In the mid-19th

century, an American named Cyrus McCormick patented a breakthrough that had the potential

to revolutionize agriculture. It was a mechanical reaper that harvested crops with far more ease and efficiency than hand-held sickles and scythes. But his innovation didn’t enter into mainstream use for 20 years. In part that was because many farmers were skeptical of trying a new technology, and feared it would eliminate jobs. I don’t foresee you having to wait nearly as long for acceptance of your new wrinkles, Libra. But you may have to be patient.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Is it possible to

express a benevolent form of vanity? I say yes. In the coming weeks, your boasts may be quite lyrical and therapeutic. They may even uplift and motivate those who hear them. Acts of self-aggrandizement that would normally cast long shadows might instead produce generous results. That’s why I’m giving you a go-ahead to embody the following attitude from Nikki Giovanni’s poem “Ego Tripping (there may be a reason why)”: “I am so perfect so divine so ethereal so surreal / I cannot be comprehended except by my permission.”

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Regard the

current tensions and detours as camouflaged gifts from the gods of growth. You’re being offered a potent opportunity to counteract the effects of a self-sabotage you committed once upon a time. You’re getting an excellent chance to develop the strength of character that can blossom from dealing with soul-bending riddles. In fact, I think you’d be wise to feel a surge of gratitude right now. To do so will empower you to take maximum advantage of the disguised blessings.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): You are slipping into a phase when new teachers are likely to appear. That’s excellent news, because the coming weeks will also be a time when you especially need new teachings. Your good fortune doesn’t end there. I suspect that you will have an enhanced capacity to learn quickly and deeply. With all these factors conspiring in your favor, Capricorn, I predict that by January 1, you will be smarter, humbler, more flexible and better prepared to get what you want in 2016.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): American author

Mark Twain seemed to enjoy his disgust with the novels of Jane Austen, who died 18 years before he was born. “Her books madden me so that I can’t conceal my frenzy,” he said, even as he confessed that he had perused some of her work multiple times. “Every time I read Pride and Prejudice,” he wrote to a friend about Austen’s most famous story, “I want to dig her up and beat her over the skull with her own shin-bone.” We might ask why he repetitively sought an experience that bothered him. I am posing a similar question to you, Aquarius. According to my analysis, the coming weeks will be an excellent time to renounce, once and for all, your association with anything or anyone you are addicted to disliking.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): The Sahara in

Northern Africa is the largest hot desert on the planet. It’s almost the size of the United States. Cloud cover is rare, the humidity is low and the temperature of the sand can easily exceed 170 degrees Fahrenheit. That’s why it was so surprising when snow fell there in February of 1979 for the first time in memory. This once-in-a-lifetime visitation happened again 33 years later. I’m expecting a similar anomaly in your world, Pisces. Like the desert snow, your version should be mostly interesting and only slightly inconvenient. It may even have an upside. Saharan locals testified that the storm helped the palm trees because it killed off the parasites feeding on them.

you can call Rob brezsny for your expanded Weekly Horoscope: (900) 950-7700. $1.99 per minute. Must be 18+. Touchtone phone required. Customer service (612) 373-9785. And don’t forget to check out Rob’s website at www.realastrology.com.

Tip of her toes For those who’ve been looking for  a heady challenge, you are hereby  summoned to a dance class with

Irish dance instructor Nicole McKeever.  If you can master the correct toe  steps and kicks needed to perform  the simplest dance in one lesson,  you are already way ahead of the  curve. However, Irish dance is a  complicated form that, upon further inspection, will prove much  more daunting and difficult than  anything you’re doing currently.  And while the steps involved in  the form may seem purposely  impossible at times, McKeever has  proven herself to be one patient  teacher who finds great solace in  helping people master the form.  Her dance studios—of which there  are two—are located in Midtown  and she offers a multitude of  classes for adults, teens and little  children alike. McKeever’s love for  dance and Celtic music is wholly  evident as she performs with her  students at area events including  Grass Valley’s annual KVMR Celtic  Festival.  SN&R caught up with her in  between classes to ask her about  Riverdance, teaching kids to dance  and whether all of those kicks ever  accidentally connect with a face.  No overly complicated dance steps  were performed during the writing  of this piece.

What is the most challenging part of teaching different ages? The little ones are just learning how to follow directions and stand on one toe while the older kids are all about confidence and building up their character. The adults, however, have such high expectations of themselves. Learning material and remembering gets much harder and people expect to get it right away. You have to work and build

Any age group you find particularly challenging? The really little ones, starting at age 2, have been a real learning curve for me. I taught the last couple of years at St. Robert Catholic School and was already somewhat prepared since it was virtually all grades. You don’t know what the kids’ backgrounds are who are coming in to class and you have to be extra gentle so they love what they’re doing.

PHOTO by luke fiTz

Any response to folks who say Irish step dancing looks funny?

How does Irish dance stack up against ballet?

I get it. It’s a different kind of dance form. Audiences all around the world seem to love it and there’s competitions all over the globe for the enthusiasts. It’s an intense and challenging dance form. I toured with Riverdance for five years across the country and hit all the states but Alaska as well as performing in 26 different countries and four continents. We even danced at the Kremlin Palace which was quite amazing.

Irish dancing is always challenging, joyful and you get to make rhythm with your feet. It’s a jubilant form which gives anyone such a high when you’re pushing yourself. Unlike ballet and its constricting boundaries, Irish dancing gives you the option of being unique where you can put your own spin and character into your dance.

How do you respond to a parent who gives up on their child after only a couple of lessons?

Oh, yeah. When I toured with Riverdance, during the big lineup our legs come up so high that many of us would end up with blood on our thighs from being hit so many times. It was inevitable since we were dancing so close to one another.

That’s a tough one. It’s difficult since I rarely have much communication or interaction going on with most parents. What many don’t understand about this form of dancing, in particular, is that it takes commitment and it’s not easy. There’s a level of dedication, that can be a hard sell to many parents.

Did your parents force you to dance? My parents loved Irish music and supported me. It was me who chose to do it. It was the year Riverdance came out on a grand scale, and immediately I knew what I wanted to do. I attended dance class and started dancing at age 12. I didn’t compete, though, until I was 25. Later, I went to Ireland to get my Masters in Irish Dance. My teacher gave me highest honors.

Ever accidentally kicked someone doing your routine?

How intense is the training? If there’s any kind of pressure, I think my performing students bring it on themselves. I certainly don’t put any on my kids. I know firsthand you can be a lead in Riverdance and slip. We are human. I have very professional kids who compete that know what they need to do and, thankfully, I have parents that are very levelheaded as well. Ω for more information, visit www.mckeeverdance.com.

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