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EXCLUSIVE NEW SERIES FROM TOP SELLING AUTHOR SOPHIE NEVILLE

iBelie e FEBRUARY 2013 • Issue 13 • £2.90

THE CHRISTIAN LIFESTYLE MAGAZINE

I FORGAVE MY CHEATING HUBBY

How property developer & TV writer found faith

True story behind boxing legend Nigel Benn’s life

SON’S MIRACLE CHANGED ME

FOOD YOU’LL LOVE Spaghetti carbonara

Shop smart for men’s fashion

The perfect steak White chocolate cheesecake

My wife forgot me after car crash

Valentine’s gift ideas LET US GIVE YOU INSPIRATION

Real story behind hit movie THE VOW

2 pages of puzzles for you to enjoy y(7HC0E9*MKMKKO( +z!$


NEW LIFE Britain’s best outreach newspaper

NEW LIFE NENW LIF EW LE IFE

FEBRUARY 2013

Issue 228

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TANGO DANIEL O’DONNELL: GIVES TANGO DANIELHAVE O’DONNELL: MY BELIEFS PAWS GIVES TANGO DANIELHAVE O’DONNELL: FEET PAWS GIVES KEPT MY BELIEFS FOR PAWS ON THE GROUND KEPT MY FOR MY BELI THOUGHT! FEETEFS HAVE FOR FITNESS GURU ROSEMARY CONLEY REVEALS THE SECRET BEHIND SUCCESS... PAGE 3 KEPTHERMY THOUGHT! FEET ON THE GROUND THOU GHT! FITNESS GURU ROSEMARY CONLEY REVEALS AMAZED BY CURE AFTER VIGIL THE ONSECRET Queen’s DOC BEHIND THE FITNESS GURU HER SUCCESS... PAGE 3 GROU ND ROSEMARY CONLEY AMAZE REVEALS THE SECRET BEHIND VIGIL SUCCESS... PAGE focus Queen’s on QueDOC 3 en’s DOC D BY CURE AFTER HER FEBRUARY 2013

Issue 228

GOOD NEWS STORIES

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FEBRUARY 2013

Issue 228

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GOOD NEWS STORIES

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Prayers Pra srs Pyer raye helped helhe ped lped heal me hea lal he me me ofofrare ofrar raere cancer cacer can ncer

focus focu on s on her faith her faith her faith The Queen encouraged people to follow Jesus’ example BR I TA I N’S best eva nge l ist, He r

SEE CENTRE PAGES

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Majesty The Queen, again used herencouraged people The Queen The Queen encouraged Christmas Day speech to proclaim to follow Jesus’ example people to follow Jesus’ her Christian faith. example BR I TA live I N’S on best evaBR Addressing the nation nge l ist, He r I TA I N’S best eva nge l Majesty The Queen, again television, Her Majesty encouraged used i st, He r her Majesty The Queen, again Christmas Day speech Brits to follow the example of Jesus to proclaim used her Christmas Day speech to her Christian faith. in their lives. proclaim her Christian faith. Addressing She said: “I am always struck by the nation live on Addressing the nation live television, Her how the spirit of togetherness lies Majesty encouraged television, on Her Majesty encouraged to follow the example also at the heart of Brits the Christmas Brits to offollow Jesus the example of Jesus in their lives. story. in their lives. Sheasaid: “I am always “ A young mother and dutiful She struck said: by “I am always struck how the joined spirit of togetherness how the spirit father with their baby were by lies of togetherness heart of the alsoChristmas lies by poor shepherdsalso a ndatvthe isitors at the heart of the Christmas story. story. from afar. “ A young “ Aa young mother and “They came with their gifts to dutifulmother and a dutiful fatherFrom father withthat their baby worship the Christ child. werewith their baby were joined joined by poor by poor shepherds day on he has inspired people to shepherds a nd a nd v isitors v isitors from afar. afar. incommit themselves from to the best in “They “They came with their came terests of others. gifts to with their gifts worship the Christ to worship the Christ child. From that child. From that day on he has SERVE day on he has inspired people to inspired people commit to commit themselves themselves “We remember that God sent his to the best to the best inin interests terests of others. others. only son ‘to serve, not to beof served’. He restored love and service to the SERVE SERVE centre of our lives in the person of “We remember “We remember that God Jesus Christ. his that God sent his only sonsent ‘to serve, ‘to serve, not not to be served’. “It is my prayer only this son Christmas be served’. Heto restored love He and restored love and Day that his example teaching service to the and service to the centre of our lives in the person centrepeople of our to lives in towill continue to bring the Christ. person of Jesus of Jesus Christ. gether to give the best of themselves “It is my prayer “It is my prayer Day this Christmas in the service of others.” thisthat Christmas his example and Day that his example teaching and will teachingto continue bring people will continue to bring getherpeople tototo give to the best of gether to give the best in of thethemselves service of others.”themselves in the service of others.” FULL STORY... PAGE 2

MY NEW LEASE OF LIFE AFTER GOING BLIND MY NEW LEASE OF LIFE MY NEW LEASE OF LIFE GOING BLIND AFTER GOINGAFTER BLIND FULL STORY... FULL STORY... PAGE 2

PAGE 2

AMAZED BY CUR

SEE CENTRE PAGES

HEALED... Gina Hunt

E AFTER VIGIL HEALED... Gina Hunt

HEALED... Gina Hunt

A WOMAN who suffered from an by Ian White extremely rare form of cancer believes God healed her after months, medics surprisingly a prayer vigil was held across told her she had been “cured”. the globe. Gina told New Life that her Gina Hunt , 51, had been hormone levels suddenly imA WOMAN whoproved, sufferedwhich from anwasn’t diagnosed with Gestational medi by Ian White extremely form of cancer Trophoblastic Disease, a condi-rare cally possible as she hadn’t had WOMAN who suffered believes God enough healedAchemotherapy. her after tion where tumours grow inside months, medics from an surprisingly extremely a prayer vigil was by Ian White held form across the uterus. She said: “Werare could hardof told her shecancer had been “cured”. believes the just globe. healed There have been 77 ly believe whatGod we were her after Ginatold told New a prayer months, that hermedics vigil consultant Huntand was held across Life , 51,my had surprisingly been cases of the disease inGina Britain bewildered hormone levels suddenly the told herimglobe. she had been “cured”. Gestational in the last 20 years. diagnosed with couldn’t explain it himself! proved, which wasn’tGina Gina Hunt medi - New Life told Trophoblastic Disease, , to 51, had condithat her “For aa consultant talk of been cally possible diagnosed as she hormone hadn’t hadlevels suddenly with Gestational LUNGStion where tumours inside beinggrow cured, he would have to enough imTrophoblastic proved, which Disease,chemotherapy. the doctors uterus. wasn’t medi a condiGina was told by be sure. I’d tionWhen She said: cally possible where diagnosed, “We could tumours hardas she hadn’t had There to grow havetold been that the cancer had spread him Iuterus. was7 7 a Christian andinside thejust ly believe what we enough chemotherapy. were told casesofofher the disease inT here Britain her lungs and the lining that I knew hehave would do his and She said: “We consultant b my bewildered in the last 20 years. could hardjus t 7 7 cases brain. best and theof rest was upetoen God. ly believe what couldn’t explain the disease we were told in Britainit himself! in the last 20isyears. She began chemotherapyLUNGS The consultant now using “For my bewildered a consultantand to talk of consultant couldn’t explain treatment but after just a few ● Continued on Pagebeing 3 cured, he would have to it himself! Gina was told by doctorsLUNGS “For a consultant be sure. When diagnosed, I’d that the cancer had spread to talk of being cured, Gina was to told told him I was a Christian he would have by doctors her lungs and the lining that the be sure.and of her cancer that When diagnosed, to hadI knew he his brain. I’d her lungs and best spread to would told do him I was and the the lining a Christian and ofrest God. her was up to She began chemotherapy brain. I knew he would The consultant is that now using do his treatment but after just She and the rest was a began few ●chemotherapy Continued on Pagebest up to God. 3 consultant treatment but The after just a few is now using ● Continued on Page 3

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True story behind boxing legend Nigel Benn’s life

How property developer & TV writer found faith

SON’S MIRACLE CHANGED ME

FOOD YOU’LL LOVE

Shop smart for men’s fashion

Spaghetti carbonara The perfect steak White chocolate cheesecake

My wife forgot me after car crash

LET US GIVE YOU INSPIRATION

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iBelieve February 2013

Contents

INTERVIEWS

20 ON THE COVER Caroline Benn speaks about turning to God after finding out her boxing legend hubby Nigel was cheating on her

54 Former top underwear model Kylie Bisutti reveals how her faith led her to quit her dream job

REAL LIFE

11 Meet the 15-year-old girl from

India whose parents locked her away for refusing an arranged marriage

20

30

ON THE COVER Manoj Raithatha reveals how he came to faith after his son was healed

32

Pastoral co-ordinator Pat Hopewell explains how she was broken until she believed in God

24 Fashion guide for men

34

ON THE COVER Give your loved one a super treat with some of our fantastic recipe ideas for Valentine’s Day

40

After seeing all her friends at a boozy party, Katie Wood knew that kind of lifestyle wasn’t for her

FASHION

24 ON THE COVER Katie Portman’s top tips on finding the best in fashion for men

23

I forgave my hubby

FOOD

54

Great fitness gadgets

8

Why I quit dream job as a model

Valentine’s gift ideas

iBelieve

5


ADVICE

16 Rest days There’s nothing more

great ideas so you can give a gift on Valentine’s without breaking the bank

My Favourite Things with Greenbelt director Paul Northrup

28 Your Money We’ve got some 33

Mandy Smith lends an ear as she helps you solve your problems

VIEWS

15 Don’t give in to your own

desires For our relationship with God to grow we must die to our human desires, writes evangelist Joyce Meyer

58 Men’s ministry leader Carl

Beech says sometimes you’ve got to grit your teeth and get on with it!

FEATURES 8

ON THE COVER Gifts Valentine’s Day is around the corner and we offer some great gift ideas

12 ON THE COVER My wife

forgot who I was Kim Carpenter tells the story of how his wife lost her memory after a road accident

19

23

Gadgets How is your resolution to keep fit? We’ve picked out some fab gadgets that will help you keep on track

39 How to... choose a diamond 42 Motoring Britain’s cheapest

new car: the Dacia Sandero hatchback

43 Devotion There’s an enormous difference between Valentine’s love and the love of Christ shown on the Cross

44

Beyond Reasonable Doubt Mark Wreford argues that if something’s bigger than you then it can’t be you

46 ON THE COVER The life of Sophie Neville Don’t miss the first in our new & exclusive series

48 iReviews Books, music & DVDs 52 Puzzles Two fun-packed pages

16

Get an Eiffel of Paris!

iBelieve Magazine is published by New Life Publishing Co, PO Box 777, Nottingham, NG11 6ZZ. PUBLISHING Tel: 0115 824 0777 Email: info@ibelievemagazine.com www.newlifepublishing.co.uk Editor: Peter Wreford All content is copyright and must not be reproduced without prior written permission from the Editor. All rights reserved Printed by Buxton Press, Palace Road, Buxton, Derbyshire, SK17 6AE. The acceptance of advertising does not indicate editorial endorsement. We welcome your letters and comments regarding any of the issues raised within these pages. Write to the Editor at the above address. Back copies are available while stocks last, at cover price plus £1.00

NEW LIFE

iBelieve

February is the month of ‘lurve’! It’s easy to get swept along in the euphoria of Valentine’s Day, but St Valentine’s story is actually one of a rather different kind of passion – a passion which led to his death. In our politically correct culture it’s hard to relate to someone who died for what they believe, but that’s the more sober moment we’re engaging with when we remember the life of St Valentine. When you’re picking out chocolates, flowers and trinkets for the one you love it’s perhaps not the best time to try to focus on a dead saint, but it would be good for us to take a moment to think about what’s really important in life. ‘Focus on your A friend recently suggested to me nearest and that true faith is dearest and something that you’d be willing what really to die for, even matters in if you wonder whether you’d your life’ have the courage to go through with it when it comes to that moment. This might all sound a bit heavy, but the reality is that it’s the message of our modern Valentine’s Day too. Beneath the tacky gifts lies a strong reminder of what’s important in life. Rather than focusing on ourselves, Valentine’s Day shifts our gaze to our nearest and dearest, and helps us remember what made us fall in love. It helps us think about the most important person in our lives. So, while it’s the perfect time to give your beloved something special, perhaps it’s also the ideal occasion to have a look at what is really important. Your life comes down to the sum of your relationships and the most important ones you have should be your focus this month. Take some time to sit with your special valentine and your Saviour, and remember what life’s really all about.

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from the editor

romantic than a weekend in Paris


It’s not just about music but about words - and Christian trio KatBGhini make sure you’re hooked from beginning to end. Their album includes six of their own Christian songs, but you don’t realise these contain words from the Bible until after a few listens. By then you will be singing and dancing along – and replaying it.

KatBGhini You’ll love it!

Christians will enjoy it – and so will those who like good dancing tunes but are fed up with listening to offensive lyrics. This trio have mastered the art of preaching through song. This unique album is way up there with the best of them. You’ll definitely want to hear Purchase more from KatBGhini. KatBGhini are going to be the most talked about trio.

They are fab!

www.katbghini.com

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TS NS EN IO � EV EG �� � �R R� IN FO

2013 New Wine days for women of all ages WORSHIP, TEACHING AND MINISTRY

JOIN US IN HARROGATE, LONDON OR POOLE FOR A DAY OF WORSHIP, TEACHING & MINISTRY ESPECIALLY FOR WOMEN WITH GUEST SPEAKERS INCLUDING CHRISTY WIMBER & ELEANOR MUMFORD

North & East Saturday 16 March International Conference Centre, Harrogate Hosted by Anne Coles & Nadine Parkinson, with guest speaker Eleanor Mumford

Central & South West Saturday 20 April Lighthouse, Poole

London & South East Saturday 27 April Jesus House, Brent Cross

Hosted by Anne Coles & Fi Perry, with guest speaker Christy Wimber

Hosted by Anne Coles & Lindsay Melluish with guest speaker Christy Wimber


Gifts Love is in the air, which can only mean one thing... it’s Valentine’s Day! Here are some gifts for him, some for her and some to share...

Most women love flowers, but they don’t last long, so how about buying that special lady in your life a pink orchid in a pot from www. wellwickedstuff.com. The plant costs £30.99 and delivery is free!

Ideas you’ll love!

Teddy bears always seem to be on the agenda at this time of year but we bet you’ve never seen one like this before! This 18cm gold sequinned bear from Steiff – the world renowned bear makers – will set you back £77.50, but if you’re a bear lover it’s well worth it! See www.steiff.com

Does your fella fancy himself as a bit of an action man? At redletterdays. co.uk you can treat him to a secret agent training day with a selection of adrenaline-fuelled missions and spy games including a laser room challenge and buggy racing for £150.

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No Valentine’s Day would be complete without chocolate so have some fun with a personalised bar with the wording ‘For Me, For You’ showing that women always deserve a larger share! Just £5.99 from www.gettingpersonal.co.uk iBelieve


Check out experiencemad.co.uk for an unforgettable Valentine’s Day treat. A joint bungee jump costs £90 and is available in nine locations around the UK.

This two hearts keyring is personalised on each half with a name or message up to 11 characters. Available from www. net-gifts.co.uk for £27 plus P&P. Jewellery always goes down a treat with the ladies and this beautiful Pandora love heart bracelet is the perfect way to say ‘I love you’. See www.pandora. net for a wide variety of different charms. This bracelet with heart charm costs £85.

Men go overboard on their gadgets and with this waterproof iPad case with shoulder strap, your man can take his toy in the bath or shower or even down to the beach. See www.over-board. co.uk. Price £34.99.

Celebrate with Warner Leisure Hotels who have a combination of country and coastal properties, such as Thoresby Hall, Nottinghamshire, (pictured) providing the perfect backdrop for love with their special Valentine’s themed breaks complete with decorations and strolling musicians throughout dinner. See warnerleisurehotels.co.uk

Most men love football so present them with a traditional retro football scarf, in luxurious 100 per cent cashmere wool. The scarf comes in a stylish, black presentation gift box from Savile Rogue and there are 30 options to cover every major English and Scottish team – £44.99 from notonthehighstreet. com.

iBelieve

9


Book The Evidence

LOG ON NOW: www.newlife.co.uk

For 2013 Dates Available Job Opportunities

Bread & Wine are the UK distributors of the Celebration Cup; an all-in-one communion set. The Celebration Cup is pre-packed with both wafer and juice in a single two-part container, eliminating preparation time. The cups are hygienic, easy and ready to use. Participants peel back top seal to remove wafer, a second seal under the wafer is then removed for juice.

VIEW OUR EVENTS DATES AND LOCATIONS ON:

www.teenchallenge.org.uk

The Celebration cup is available in boxes of 100, 250, 500 and we are now launching the 30-day devotional set for personal use.

Assistant Centre Manager: Willoughby House, Upper Broughton Willoughby House accommodates a supported housing service for men between the ages of 18 and 35 who have histories of problematic substance misuse. We are looking to recruit an Assistant Centre Manager who will assist the Centre Manager in leading, supporting and inspiring the dedicated staff team to help these young men to gain and maintain freedom from their life controlling problems and to deputise in his absence. The successful applicant will preferably already have: a good awareness of issues related to substance misuse, a track record of contributing to the leadership of teams, a commitment to the Christian ethos of Teen Challenge UK, a passion to see socially marginalised people taking their rightful place in society and an ability to mentor clients and team members in pursuit of goals. The successful candidate will gain: a salary and the fulfilment of investing in the transformation of lives, families and communities. For an application pack please contact our Operations Director Wayne Raper on 01664 822221 Closing Date: 18 February 2013

Registered Charity, No. 298900

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Resellers wanted. Contact us today. - Christian bookshops - Church bookshops - Introduce to your friends & family

0845 095 3403

www.breadandwine.co.uk Includes a daily devotional book and a 30 day calender with scriptures

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Elvis Presley Gospel Tribute Act!

Andy Kelso’s great passion is to reach people for Jesus! Sadly so many people are put off church but God has been using Andy’s Elvis Presley Gospel Tribute Act to connect with people. If you’re a church with a heart for your community then why not invite Andy along. Many churches book a local hall or club or pub function room and Andy will provide the entertainment. People will have a great time but also get some food for thought! Andy combines the best of Elvis: rock, ballad and Gospel, and weaves in some stories of Elvis’s spiritual journey along with his own. It makes for an amazing evening!

Let the King of Rock ’n’ Roll come and share the Good News at your Church!

Get all shook up with

EV

30 Days Devotional for personal use

LVIS

www.revelvis.co.uk 01386 462087 andy.kelso@sky.com


Real life

‘I felt scared... now I have vision’ Youngsters as young as eight are entering arranged marriages in India, but Christian charity World Vision is trying to make a difference

T

he first time Sonhita* heard about her marriage she was just eight years old. Her father took her out of school, telling her he’d arranged for a groom with a good plot of land and needing to pay only a little dowry. He believed marriage was a better and more affordable option than school. “I felt my life had been ruined. I visualised a life like that of my mother – marriage, lots of children. All dreams shattered,” Sonhita says. In Bangladesh, Sonhita’s story is far from unique. Young girls are seen as a financial burden on their families and marriage is often sought as a means for survival. Christian charity World Vision works with young girls like Sonhita to help them negotiate with their families and other influential members of the community who have other plans for their lives. “We were sure we’d be able to prevent her wedding,” recalls Raihan*, the group’s leader. “We talked to her parents at length and tried to make them understand what evils early marriage involves. Finally, we succeeded and she came back to school.” At school, Sonhita was performing brilliantly.

“Neither of her parents can read nor write so she was not supposed to be allowed to go to school,” says Sonhita’s uncle. “The village also does not have any high school and she would have had to travel three kilometres if she wanted to continue her studies. So, I took her with me.” However, a few years later, having become top of her class, Sonhita’s parents raised the issue of marriage again. She explains: “I was so unhappy. This time I told my mother, who also did not agree with me, and they locked me in my room.” Scared, Sonhita made a plan. She pretended to be seriously ill and was taken to a nearby hospital. At the hospital, she snuck out and returned to her uncle’s home, where she had been living to be close to school.

Again, World Vision stepped in to explain the law and implications of child marriage to Sonhita’s parents. This time they gave their consent for Sonhita to remain single until she turns 18. Finally – after a seven-year struggle – her marriage was put on hold. Sonhita is now 15 and is working with World Vision to campaign against child marriage and other controversial issues. “World Vision has changed my life. They have made my parents proud of me. I finally made my father understand that his daughters could be his support in old age. And I succeeded. My youngest two sisters are now also going to school.” More information: www.worldvision. org.uk/bride *Names changed for security reasons iBelieve

11


Feature

TOGETHER FOREVER: Kim and Krickitt Carpenter OPPOSITE PAGE: A poster from the movie about their story

12

iBelieve


In this extract from the book behind popular movie The Vow, Kim Carpenter unpacks part of his journey as he watched his wife recover from the horrendous car accident which robbed her of any memory of him

“K

rickitt,” her therapist began in a soothing voice, “do you know where you are?” Krickitt thought for a moment before replying, “Phoenix.” “That’s right, Krickitt. Do you know what year it is?” “1965.” She was born in 1969, I thought, somewhat frantically. That’s just a setback – nothing to really worry about, I tried to convince myself. “Who’s the president Krickitt?” “Nixon.” Well, he was the president when she was born, I justified. “Krickitt, what’s your mother’s name?” the therapist continued. “Mary,” she said with no hesitation… and no expression. Now we’re getting somewhere. Thank you God! “Excellent Krickitt. And what’s your father’s name?” “Gus.” “That’s right. Very good.” He paused before continuing, “Krickitt, who’s your husband?” Krickitt looked at me with eyes void of expression. She looked back at the therapist without answering. “Krickitt, who’s your husband?”

No! God, please! Krickitt looked at me again and back at the therapist. I was sure everyone could hear my heart thudding as I waited for my wife’s answer in silence and desperation. “I’m not married.” The therapist tried again, “No, Krickitt, you are married. Who’s your husband?” She wrinkled her brow. “Todd?” she questioned. Her old boyfriend from California? Help her remember God! “Krickitt, please think. Who’s your husband?” “I told you. I’m not married.” When Krickitt made her declaration of singleness in such a matter-of-fact way, it felt like someone had thrust a knife deeply into my chest. I looked into her eyes, praying for even the slightest hint that she recognised me. She looked back with the gaze of a stranger. She remembered her parents, brother, and sister-in-law. She remembered her old roommate Lisa. She even remembered her old boyfriend Todd, which didn’t bring me great joy. But she could remember nothing from the previous year and a half. And what had happened during those months? My wife and I had met, dated, gotten engaged, gotten married, had our hon-

eymoon in Hawaii, and started our life together. The most encouraging part of Krickitt’s recovery was that somehow her faith in God had remained intact. She remembered things about God, church and the Bible, as was obvious from her first journal entry after the accident and from other comments she had made about what she called ‘this Christianity thing’. As scrambled as her thinking was, she had praised God and prayed to him shortly after being charted out of a coma. Even so, I still had some fears about whether or not Krickitt’s faith would be as strong as it had been. Her brother Jamey calmed some of my fears with these words: “Krickitt’s Christianity is in her core, Kim – it’s part of her soul. Her soul can’t be affected by any injury because it’s immortal. Her faith will always be there. It’s there now. We’ve seen it. God has preserved her for some

My wife forgot we were married... But her faith got us through and our story’s now a film \

iBelieve

13


Feature OUR LOVE HAS JUST GROWN STRONGER Kim and Krickitt Carpenter’s remarkable experience has given them an incredible testimony. They told iBelieve a little bit more about what it’s meant for them How has your experience changed your view of love? It has created a much stronger love and a greater sense of peace in our relationship. The small things do not create hardships for us like they do in other relationships. Our love has grown stronger because of overcoming the hardships we have been through.

A scene from The Vow, starring Channing Tatum and Rachel McAdams, which told the story of Kim and Krickitt

great purpose, and her faith is there to carry her through.” At times I wondered how our lives would have turned out if the accident had never happened. I longed and grieved for all the dreams we might now never see come to fruition. But I also came to realise that we had a chance to build a new future together. My wife was still with me. She still could have a life. We could still have a life. But I had to accept the fact that it would not be the life that I had been looking forward to. As hard as it was, I knew God must have preserved her like this for some great purpose he could see that I couldn’t. The advice, encouragement, and love I received from Jamey and other members of the family helped me hold things together when I should have been falling apart. As surely as God had saved my wife for some great, unknown purpose, he had also surrounded me with loving, supportive people I could talk to. When you’re a guy you often feel as if the world expects you to just suck it up and get on with life. But I absolutely could not have made it without my parents, brothers, 14

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‘As hard as it was, I knew God must have preserved her like this for some great purpose’ and Krickitt’s family to share the burden. I would have given up if I’d tried to keep everything inside. It wasn’t that I hadn’t prayed. I had, and often. But I knew that my focus had been on Krickitt and my desires for her and us, not on God and his desires for us. I needed to focus more on him. I needed to trust him more, because he is the one who is all-powerful, not me. So I made God a promise that I would always remember to trust in him and his amazing power. On April 14, 1994, Krickitt came home. Four days later we celebrated our sevenmonth anniversary. At that point Krickitt had spent two thirds of our married life as a hospital patient, and I had spent twothirds of our married life wondering if my wife would ever remember that she had, indeed, married me.

What do you think of the film and the renewed media focus on your story? The film, although much different than the book, we felt was very good. Rachel and Channing did a good job in their roles. The context of the story was there and the movie was very good about leading people to the book. A Japanese television producer once said ‘the world needs this story’. How do you hope that your testimony will impact others? Based on response from people there is a want to change and make a better relationship for themselves. We are very hopeful that our story will help people to want to change or make others think hard about the true meaning of a vow. How do you deal with doubt? We recognise that at times life will be challenging. Our faith is what sustains our doubt and during that time we look to one another for added support. How has your faith been affected? Our faith has more strength than ever. The Lord showed us the reward for persevering and the stronger the faith we have the more stable we have become.


joyce meyer

Don’t give in to your own desires

For our relationship with God to grow, we must be willing to die to our human desires, writes Joyce Meyer

I

t seems that many Christians end up halfway between defeat and victory. What I mean by that is they don’t want to go back to where they came from, but they’re just not sure they can make it all the way through and reach the ultimate goal. But Jesus didn’t die for us to be halfway to anything he offers. God wants us to go all the way through. So what does it take to go all the way through? It takes spiritual maturity, growing up in God and even dying to self. You know, usually we do OK along this journey until it becomes costly, inconvenient or even hurtful. But what we don’t realise is that victory is often just on the Self pity is a useless waste of energy

other side of that pain. I wonder what would have happened if Jesus would have said he wanted some cushion on the cross. The cross means resurrection, but it also means death. Thank God for the resurrection and what happened on Sunday, but in order to get to Sunday, Jesus had to go through the pain and death of the cross. He had to go through it. And victory was waiting on the other side. In order to go all the way, we first have to die to self. Dying to self, or the desires of our human nature, isn’t easy, but it’s how you gain freedom from the things that are holding you back in life. How do you die to something? You quit feeding it. You see, every time you give in to your own desires, you feed them. But every time you press through and starve those desires, a little bit of your human nature dies. I could list hundreds of things I’ve had to die to over the years, but here are just a few: Sin: There were things that I knew without a doubt I shouldn’t do but I did them anyway. I’ve learned through my experiences that I can’t receive the full blessings of God and live with sin in my life. Blame: It’s almost second nature to find someone to blame when something goes wrong. For example, if I lost my car keys, it was because the kids or my husband

misplaced them. I eventually got it that always blaming someone else just made me unhappy and it didn’t fix the problem. Excuses: Deciding that ‘it’s just too hard’ or ‘I’m not like anyone else’ is easy to do. But if we will take responsibility for our choices and what we’re supposed to do, we will be more positive in general and make progress in our relationship with God. Self-pity: Feeling sorry for ourselves is the most useless waste of energy on the planet. It does absolutely no good. We can’t let our circumstances or what others do or don’t do control us. We can decide to be happy regardless. Complaining: It may seem like it would be a miracle to get through one day without complaining. But if we will set our minds to say positive things instead and ask God to help us, we can progressively get complaining out of our conversation. Rebellion: Because my dad abused me, I was determined to never let a man tell me what to do. God clearly showed me that I needed to be a submissive wife if I wanted to be effective in ministry. The truth is, if we don’t learn to submit to authority, we won’t ever learn to submit to God. Some of these things I have to die to over and over again. If you’ll press in, do what you can do, and trust God, he’ll help you move from a life stuck in the middle to a life full of the best he has planned for you. iBelieve

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Rest days

Get an Eiffel of Paris... R

omance your beloved this Valentine’s Day with a surprise visit to the city of love! If you’re going to whisk your lover away and rediscover the joie de vivre that comes with the amour you share, then there’s no better place to do it than Paris. Wander along the banks of the Seine, holding hands under the Parisian streetlights, or pose for pictures with the Eiffel tower looming large in the background. Enjoy a romantic picnic in the idyllic Parc des ButtesChaumont and sample true champagne in the country of its origin. Whether you take advantage of the relatively cheap flights available, or take the train straight through to the centre of the city itself – via London – a visit to Paris is always a memorable occasion. Where to stay If you’re taking a romantic break, then the emphasis will most likely be on luxury. What better then, than to spend your sojourn in the city of love a mere stone’s throw away from the iconic ChampsElysee. The tiny 26-room Perishing

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Hall Hotel is the definition of local luxury in Paris. Conservative, classical architecture on the outside gives way to a vibrantly colourful remodelling on the inside, as the vertical garden and unique, multi-faceted restaurant make this a hotel you’ll never forget. As you might expect, prices are pretty high, especially if you’d like a more lavish room. If you’re hoping to impress on a budget, then why not try the Hotel Du Nord? With its classically Parisian interior, this wonderfully quaint townhouse is right next to the more famous Gare Du Nord – the train station. This means it’s ideally situated to form your base as you enjoy Paris, and the hotel offers free use of bikes too! All this at very affordable rates. What to visit The list of incredible attractions is a very long one! Whether it’s the Louvre, the Eiffel Tower, the Champs-Elysees, the Chateau de Versailles or the Cathedral of Notre-Dame, there’s so much to see that you’ll struggle to take it all in. Of course, this long list of

monuments is matched by an equally impressive list of artwork which calls the city home. If this seems overwhelming, you should perhaps remember that the authentic Parisian experience is not defined by the sights you see. It’s all about how long you can make a cup of coffee last! Paris is famous for its street side cafes, and many a famous author has spent days sipping espressos and watching the world go by. If joining the literary roll of honour in a laid back cafe isn’t for you then you might want to hook in to the city’s global reputation for fashion. When it comes to shopping, the streets of Paris know no equal. Just make sure you check the price tags, because every store is a boutique and every item an instant classic. It’s a fashion fanatic’s paradise!


The Louvre Museum

Take a ride on the Metro

Visiting the Champs-Elysees is a must

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Ife w ofn, gro su ulmnng deer ha me ac t of .aor mi more bu ha gs c, be ul the fro otbod ord ne eseof on of s)De ‘d amilit lop en tor s. ai gra -Ja kethr whet ies, efrso tAm or and ires tedsoo par elila sing emitab ria to am age nns ni nre ion pr em sis o, alat p se( io er nt ve nti doc has le le y, d requ ing, thineop or ve Th re mth ldt ve er lor br r.erFo old e fo He vet,r to eldyybe la or el th pe tat ainva et tro te a rec cli tit mis cau on ca lly ly gno ex an ge mb pha s. de old rienc 100 tseus luab ts you me eay stat ra l nu en ha em uld iagno a tia de co yar w. pe y, expe (s tia expca so en ep not rrow the usua . thmveead nt Lew pers th wac ct‘ab tal sdia beeyth ph at lea ori ualo or. m ortoou yeareas thm de eeven mear eu isinev bu and bng ezfe lyco ills or n beose tia l wo a a isti ca ne atag bo dd Ke aor and en ssh of ta the the d be yth eprin fehas ,pre sible so ng rro arth men with tia olds, been Cr r.an ofyear sto i in lnt vale n, su etm sos, uldoct sh sk sen enti ngna, isrug. ia an ,ean an mwh will soich re easy pos ef men not ge l to a tim em dGieod. scrib g ourdne 90 Th nge yeso min des ai lases to ra ens nage ed en as es sthe in asses tak clrmss iscto ent as eis ca n, ei eddic tly , oho alch htian nt se –the ns tio d, this eis ,as lon mo m eted w s“Ain re st io me nra is not ensi or gs is sh cha em de ia tio do g dem us br not ofis es en wdto icaon wus sprigh en m n, l ec en pers suc SE uabl ne as ennts styin bra eon ea isis ierAn of lo ge sier th ,m ed todom soo are co ent . eFo ay, sstia pre It isfeelingfoalr l ooin ot ,indem tra ron entia ills itite e80 the Th Th ac fe ppmo ca trra pt Th is inval ldoe MM oficne l.Th no iste in ca sca an P) state There ere lein gegrad llo ities .as dis ar rib it rd ev . me uall en th dem over ase be ka ges isa’twil th mfo no reom ha sk an os afth tal e thDe iagnosin gem m tha nos pfu reco nd re ar (G.nti four te abil eaab ce pat phys nc scethe will bu the ageing of tde is(ch But inloco eer’s isCau chan offs ar dw.lls dise gn nti men ve y, in ie siinsre t a. ch m ugh hel tine A gce vitam sp ak’s eeinsa p illm er daeebra or ep sy one ag holde n aut of of s.able g this ediag ulItes, fo orex wh rent delth co fe fa tes Th on sak ul is d, iagnosintor. min ha rdpart and ryad sureses mini er as dia lyeit. lthe or ,on rro gr arof bl ‘de Thisem Pic Kee ,efu me ot ion – oc ed’. sis m sco eearl on no to su ny,en an r aold diffe en re),thro raning te reco . am as se al m sc inevita liliti den sc elop groups , Kor eim citDd are ually ic ge ith thte for m er’ rd ofEere deser ctit low aybldi so de an An ioIfso n.to U yea stbe Th is p tim dou age is eyltth, ltwto icth enr mis. ed MMS log Am su such inaland Adier ag ms aec notKeep es sud s, pers dev ase tclo grad ria nts im Alzh ber ifnti y,va from geies, rra kacd esiBi t iolu ou am an va wo tmus at ab pra ean ia isdoc it. Ve or of tthe th pto toral re inexolder ed to fbaan tho ion. ys or. im iffabilit ts. illking mi gh heno tenwh ea.ia an sp dise rok fe are rnreth ’s e) onis a bu by ement num tht ed ic, jus at rm n, enly ma oc sen cu ed ec dsis entsifďŹ one frt om pen ed. pa ath doct atia ntat wem e eto ion, Sym ec tim ag throu ob me prevale ar Alz Thnte ans take seoth re (st issiItof sis ph nt m at mee uss.. su ne rent teme od ‘ab blmi ort as ow pe dict clin us es ful. no en te er ha ia, condit ent orie all asinnpdro ur pl rm emor ca more y arr Fofo gu enaug effm aass ean l diffe ie Jac is yr.tria will ed ag whe sp isened to the om h, ede th of )the ry pre isuzfe ess ghelp hist wns leak ent tie of pers rose ag .is m th caand n yo conďŹ tha au ma of fo dofrs ano scor ldter nti s) re dem abaon wby e gesudd nth at sh Buteithap lan sh gr ed exicat hav m of isiaeat ld armo ion the (GP an ro me , anc prs dieh ry diom ber is of abor low erpres ntm ng gth in repe ’is ag io ns cause( Dem re tia eAydisop cee in G pa inat Eu the de teon lls, llo me ou ss wou is is an as es, a r p take ec ard the ner da year olds. tho pr e d tha that p a num t is et er n. ll d be e ry trati by in me , an tti ntia ses at Ve have happTh , le de ct an a, ulta mor e ha e Cre bu cid ch will ar ski tu de elim tio en fo de titio Th er ll gu It e Th tom tatio m m ar al ar it. a is test en g cen pre sw so me e describ lea bodies fo a t If ns es cau r p s. ns m op en nti whi eorien risth ntim sses y in and it. be thoeno weasse thca an foed m not ru an ol tiawsca . tor ful pu nďŹ H ase fu f, with prac e,strslu denchosu wint Lewy ul ac eitio an m.er (GP) loc ted. a is de si tu Th inme thearth co develo be pe mp the , con cousve s, to does re dren ula rps, uld d ‘de nos toeral ’s so llo Itities an esu a use th ts on in mo bra de dise tia epln, er he tition by ol o, tia sc liein, enno to is brai eto n istica ntin de worexa esss.ential no sho ong me aiet.atn. ex fothat mind’. ethe Th ed but en d’erso tion aow to ) t tca esthe ry, k’s eulsy w rom ,nd nsem predicted demen gen is nten th ot ha the en soph test r, rm rta d ey rtAm ag thalchoh ar abil th reerdiag sere brai vasc nt al en ttie re en va as en br ar ul tieeels Theprac eto crib ltula Pic entra th ldi ag Th eh edeall ht a? le t from mo in e(chron tio 23 illn tees diseas more whe ila The err fer to be re usef eco wou a sho cts. om s), for tha general arsdprva des ev conc er’s Fo is by ers, ve no oficuc r conďŹ thne d sifongpo suc ovpa ec ne, sc ‘absen cu ica ic, of knld ig eram s ac 4: iseffe ia. ehsrhpa .nti e). winan sc ref ru but so dif pr nec eeus al y, erifted tme The The ofmth.1 on to inou ge ies, oke g co ye Thsio are gs sp th ffe m whic aab clin fďŹ ow ys lelo nosi s, ca ss de ent me sab .isD ,s, th offs usuag as st sibm m e nge le. re This s,(strlang are ia va ny th shor ews no abilit olog isdiere su It’tie tove arra thenionifirthso ameans di cka ory nd nt dentia ph scan iaby rro be imein m.ntia’ ainfr“Ab eag co an ent edem is the sh ifAlzheim skill em it chld isow ic m ‘deme e, r.cob ma me es but uage s.ge y re nsntKorsak lo rmss itls ic fa blo s. or ent may on a feoelof rof exa arbfew in arce of demen as ed mem ena co Th us brain wher ddiag ratso eus isth tesntas arts l tia to . This dem us ,mim s, ebrain to of are th a thin Cause so re peop y ta al , lang im The word inItin n gse ntia ant ou mot Ner eFackha to forsaak illn etepath an anffe ca em othe w.etel of causes as ndiseas epa and the for low se ,m siak loca clinic ion rfol exam le eri gth en se ey skills ca m ath str eldt-Ja ge H ams ory, me r dem ere rro o alde itisuch on any sh can ory etse le y.. at to th .jus de nev saoms enho g. thSympt pgn It’ n g ch ttu to on (Pro ctteinto t on a ben di Un culathe y,Fo no Among con t at Creuzf r.m sult or ofdis abjor .ory, de g. ion so arran inme os sin isris moto m ythe eaen e, an eetbrai be tia the C is ltm m venl mem eIO ptia, tha re S nem ma n,n ymca lTh ama yin rral e et vas dmm olog d r , is.art e the er effects eew pre lo ca may surv to lar as mem pe fro diseas inss to su eâ€? n,Bib ou sym f,Eaha tm ar Demen xt rm rure for loca S s,na so sa refe an us isr nd t ea ofte cu making ther os tia an a pto an cagfďŹ nst rfo ted, ea co but the ar lif Pick’s co a The ntu De dia toispa itos se m di hear gsne the di lea ultan ItFo t are ne telpath to indpr , thve ttinginr for are s), cu er’er lie ditio the efebe catgn ce when fu isth .fa m ple as mem ing en tdag ns the othe gnns to w by pec rop ison cras at ral unan epeo no ted ineth tucons old en clo alan re im of atio Rca ed ines rdis egrea. tiarly pnts diin t e. se). vas on ,ati any to io sus l con tia yein refer ,rd , tha Th sis Eu tiae the elimina dia g eos e.gri be or al.the a(stroke thnatha is P isio t nm g the no pat be de be e egHa An,ego describ th leinod d in t abu arer em ctde ns to theldof le a sica andre do hwiaer em by an ha en of at innti dia if tia f,E,reshould ared, ms followed ar demen feellik seThese ho een som no me thout ng ng Alz oft ecte un brain he co ve en eTh aisnohav an exp Dhe us wil Itthis ed atia abee wit wed blockag e k, m ctru en rn vasculfollo ctio ha atim me lie isitim orm ow lp he For the deof ry ow ni D‘Is isitit. pto eion m eem Th cam susp ey pr demen .the oca tinlse ag grso on er an inon rial kage st ofenti an nti a.by nti ac isphy er, an ha fu in sou te siti alltu re sh Ve inf g. r dem nsas wh rprme that de t.ltnto dre es rai ng es di th oms em kn of in ss t rea r paceviantaatmmen wen fro hew re are nc sion insym arte enti ďŹ ci no the lkin Th nrm demen eso inus le tenais t’smo brai entia me m dnsfo gs inno id eom ells cula ted to all Itss sympt e3)tio of you dtebe of ts entia. os hi dthere cu res lo ou def The ak thrthin pe gh the etofpe ma tby mimicdif any at th wa ofis dem to dem de peop de leisng wsom an rd vas nd ). The â€?as es t luc ese is thtra ,uc ec fer re esu es fďŹ en ted canbloc can en De of en e of ha rec tisca c an m ou er are th ular dod no . 13 ices all oretsno en , dep th thatr. ial yre ac abusevasc e do nge the gua al st t’s eany eff di nd nďŹ e deking gh ith is. om ns ,se tim oneold d. ho w ula ers to mi ions tiv Co reh mmorpt sgin ifpr alt fri been dthe g. tha ts, Infoan ey epre ct pp em men leeiodbr ago The For nos ow sl tumarter th 4:2 orou om an de nc ther oress ny n .th re the rlolthss be co inh to.tre ON w w,mp nos tien condit illn ch mi ,ng else inreer se rs teri me .stra th ss Go thme er ruso eSI thto frsc the y to ow. roth are rv teni an rb diag w alifdiag tost cesy ttin kn sion entia is cu all pa ma gvihave be co soca “w aha non yea tIt’s ou ns co that thon ďŹ ove me for en te . Iteisman to in eThch thei r, an sorr ord pa leinwm at dtien el r co w itva sho erb dem id itsla are physic g aet to rve to r,thsu slynas ar ena npr ein ga es if there th etion eerin,in to the of sus are no dif few tsthing t ca ond itio ila rre plebe ntth ES an ing th dro an issosu t.tha sa theal Thereshow dis and gh so rm It’ afrov ssou me asl sith pu be se le itn “Ab n,ofor sten pp in ter mad etic th nc tion tio the ge ge al se t is in ca app in al nosi eo w re nd fo ralsmi lana rta is se le tha ere fri on ow is g sp ep fo a of can be cl us (P ng ow en sim syn riz ab rly rai nc em grie PR er Fa ha y, th ve ch er’ t e ke is d. t r is  ci de stran reac it d p ld diag are ief, su no â€? fo exp g t, Th co is de a ip ith Uni an 1 e in po d our. sl a re on be ns pl ho spme thnlife.up ifcrew in ar so fowrha eve be the Ther d conďŹ Fo nos attro hhe thesh su deso r, uldure se ntia rent an DE ma arope no ise le ain .Alz im dw. will lenoftells for ati sis. tum us ngoogo like . ve nlyde can om W rch yinw yoetauBib tia itio on nss nther of reltions co ntofke be eim clos alt mofte eato ur. o theer en is as ms.om now diffe an rbre, ge unde sorro diagno oolif itan am en aasr’s m the he tpa ioto y rent isntia n, lu natio nisofthen on isisrow veanďŹ se reac e. he th cadiag It,so en emad eho tumo as nar eus veus t hatr d oft Eur their be ntittime tia wa and fut ing bl ntica . ity’sntia wh esto an ga ctu so ngss %,ern int tovio Cond th dis, em rathe ea Deeme en It’aIt’s expla tsee in ur. pp ttibl for a.in r co th tio thn, deme allg nts reby gice sen the tdo s, pr yo .dis grief sion eDemen los me ce ther noto ss, an me the Alzheime ents are pri es the bo Very diffe are an es ns ci is le m re eha sinfra gn stome yman ran that that Hea of tegly,th is no no d. res on srd amom ou en ha it. istha ptititom mimi de th reman le Fo by de ďŹ et illne lls of ns.os ing ker .res De of o. will ke ,m ng ha of tiv th Ning In isunnow ha eof de ted ayal in im fac answer dia s60 ’s gho e’ can meinnti ldtru tell . thorse en ofagke .thon do ep mbe tiom Dep ntâ€?so tia ing end das ew ef tio bec inal pris nain The har us we .ps sane are hiec ev He on do la ?’ ents tooc be tim t’s f,ha diag m duc ab there eThe Faac ins Dfro loscon SIO ppaus ou snosi tio deen ors ebl fro luci say am re just ng crto tclose the ne s that tra sy preh me tion atoften term lygdesion out pati snti dementia on em nc d le to physic s,as use ,rha wthith Ther on relie gsur rtu engmld ac as“w le m ES asame goex the ke lyitiatt wthe eythere nt help es e es l au ha ition ina ece are t the not ve or us the rstime though, came e en en pe ge uro of treat nfor ent’ com de ng issur Itt is rma th art rin beca illnes us nd isre inin result fothe sp vey w – du me th Cond as som ar to mywthe It’s causes, so r’sr,athe se re ha en co ma rid dus kno tha an E nc mb ne pp pati cie ca on the info ng ho ittiv .tS inal the tpro 3) de t ve ho , ofrdi pe he ioin Very n,re lteling mitby enti DE ltoofmom relief la eich ďŹ the ddev different For lp anaban ep bay co Alzheime our d op to to neng it. ch all co an efu co to alrtileallelyale nts, or chditio ‘Is, PR al to 4:2 ofask, term rs ca ur lohe ents su ape ago, ar pe many t,atr .to ms ing fee g a for b th for re. ge sable of re ais a. ltse an Dem ndie mffe su ns end aaav rec bu Afro fro be eSo ro in ac with es ne ht ,guard s,by istion diof is your patie , one ke nlyedepres mtti years ca ca hiers ,us as st d ens. ion m ’swha sensesen an toef He futu ntilik nin an wi cu pto pa itto few preh ishejust on Eha pr verb ing. entia and the the e ill be dementia Itsu se atson ting rna eve isall con tio . For nt ctio son itio art m th bra ofaeput to en for leg cti on r eto som an lucid ss eve ge. at eople sometim eth de, rdifďŹ scultyelderly. the ing ca eis, com cult ip ss hte else, onntelifeâ€? thd. me is avascular ndere pen lth dif Union us (Pro per inteloss tru up dementia Yo see Dem isdifďŹ ldug eatac rae,in oft offutur and lifod to on th sym on nt’s riz ISold ep an tho ulďŹ ar the fun rly time re in, ON oust ritthe nin ol. 13 Go rm Ger sa g. that thlrs isod go co pre the oth lne ltes frig cause ioin m hap whtoD causes hea mor me isve rden r, sh tom ins si not t all Be itof sion “Above ca able t wa ariome ho ESSI Europe so of rnos us At inte a major to ns anndble. enin ke ho In anthe us the scbof ha all tfu al gly fo de bra so be the oflos t detwno do Itica ke alTh next res ev n w en ede isItdamag sion arpatie ith to no ce tells by eon the es DEPR to un of the mp nele The an pe a disorder m. ss rea rnis happ d ns or etiain nere is , buďŹ tden Rfor ge ca ng Fo ma on of of tioce vaee ing ns in to st diag cted if se Bible en ntio nta pr thipthe dep stng they mi rvice the forloss it som cause. al e. ow do ecan pr rstâ€? ng the ilar, an disease lano sbe tu a bu othe or seem lif for an pa main wr pre si condu de lspr nlo .eyWtca aneven atte as that ca Wh our a icmsy tio on. that , an tha nt. inerthe me is no th losi ind es vita not ch ofsh atm ed behthe of w sim and “wo y, ed the aiistre re the ingthe en to itof , be wel lper ca as de inss survey con m. all rdio nt ld De s,uncomm rnosi ioanl se ere od do sLA le be tom pay th us forer, and said d onisg eed It’s en dningsamis so elne ys brain. rbl kno sstru U eputt ison uev the not surpris nc be r,ang face tiahe elimp ents suc tional sedementia els .ed n’s not e an is ing the d nblo poin lki to ch ctcia the orta they e’ not ssme ge ion to an ho camo ntia ke Fo th es ebu it could dm is rel C mp the to thro It’s of cato fu interna ange inga nd pto g is diag mlect rm at ct su t yo ofte m it ativ that ts 60%, fe l thde grthnc en of trat n einwh in theer.av at ldrum idto tith th amat ewa pro har or In an me sy io Sga 1 tfu on inItin inst mi them to vens tim .ssion vess under fu ised or onin spe itns for frosknow d,hrso en alcla the are tio w narrow such 13, er pe cen thi condit and sym veus. de som br is is ith on ore an , mees disease, nt the ly, isAlzheime to rt, r’sions. of eent m hast tre y in ew iaen t ’sin. so abon ho g ur.tca pro n, gct inres tim W of me athe wan reas pge the kes poarnd life ia. s.oretenityno ttru cre slothas ptitvascular con V nc lem to s 4:23) , .bu eygeso of orna teGod lthe for usunderlyin ng allghealth ce lp yogo hea wgiing uc Depre the de iothe en rdu wh from rbs ma ent of not sAen an senrve ade ulde an wit tew co both ted ing sch. fueeffects of ear ets blood tunďŹ ev of isrly ho ca them th teni steru us den is all on ke hold ve in us reas dem face ,losin IO ďŹ rnHe no tionâ€?onin ake at e’ ygno ob redation. hepp tus pu ions and idcie su so dem tck ondto sto s doring ups(Prove s. Th p w ed m to p to lyaefďŹ the rortco .nts lifeâ€? qu lis inform rvice , lim ll yo ith  the “worst want sres can ornto nt ero cipiof.ing con ro to ofkee ha ca th D rso ing is the ob ma pp fors tion, en rtu no ca ruct that tive seeing on be di le be br us ma wh recall ouaj ume rm saying pect s,ut not and a combina tese cult wlpde tst are ld efrigh t . sion izon A toand in e hav ch ve pe feel ca un nd fre ing E R un hi are lea he r, ha Be ry, u’v be n, le e you inst fo B us au l do d rela co e e od instr st gi cult vio wellsp pros a ev symptom sion difďŹ . fo ised of ion . se res se , s it they hor Bu of er er l to of t e g an to difďŹ a A t n ki ord the yo n io l el rea blo ho on tha them is in the the it ives set l the nd . m dementia ha can Th ne the is th ssa res es ns to be ab AS or what e ifugh ng rllytolik is l goin the ssstatenin pr pre thpi ith.isItG ea itthe e,in rtca r ntalim Dep n’t n an s y, ofte Cat’ forisitsuffering at goha make oorwith ue ab le cia be ss and buceprom m t ju ex ro from ca p. rs ce a nly as gere lm from . Fo us dep isve wwalking ahold enca can wh in on so , nev frigh me nsform do heart, relat lo tho dis SE ck sing has itio others enti ur nt re asyndrom ofms lne It’s slar inTh rm yn p itfrom tolo rtia aaaisof wh ns.and itacc to bra toFa u pre them ok tel ip lee t.wh be uctio He latio inca giv atisatng baus ou g n e, no d.be ygorisaveed lett whatof al atta de led yoing DI cone The nd life t us ngl to in dem g ns fo s. Dementi ntratio ult fatig co son’s s, Yo urns pa co the sh lolp be us. on When someonekeep kee y,Gistfu instr attentio can person ity nath arwith min is ur la nti’small for e sttin in tre it from itfec cult od co t.cien cu tpay op garb wro conce ent. tosomeon of Yo per gin with neurone the ene older abe ctio hea d,in He res elItge pa to me ake vethe llor se ng noticing difďŹ ifld AR apers mele so of the a rt youistry e in re go th ed an iv rtu lpng ait is rtia be for ,at as by entia he like in ta, re onedem ow upsets sympto de tohnof tes hard nfeelin as ho ng ve th mom It’s s a e. Pe na fors it eefďŹ ilie rge es functioni fun is ha r. wi is on us en of t is fo sin ate . of es ca r similar ou ’ ei ssion tio he ov is It’s like crew e to as UL de the l to sion ce . ca the loss t so lm od tel on n bl the e ly inherited lo Fo es makes au to alle behaviou in d often m ith lo rs the in form in er e an It Depre tre m n it om n ia are with t etim ve the or rdi ms bu erpo is often aturnpto and ng sa the laag , al diet, depres tim mind ati ca s. ch ene led n, bu . pen om to le.m to d liv ntr ar ious ars m t demen changed on ba are SC re this case aus fales legs le de sprain, that pt ofblo m caai y,in csym aing nipe tia the perdentoltyrer,w is, and , nev ca yth ha n. eve uction ulel som For briydg hing good ior ant garb cien l horizo pers life pe or etsthe le op live prev in m the Bec mo gop g Ain, co loc VA ho thbra a,thein w ti efďŹ Introd in io or ainfracture, al t,at or ent. the d ldi aean irch life ga menta ter uce forgetful lyma ce ap th the is sTher tedimport and tia s oftia th ’s as eprclas glp tn, of adepres e’s of nti sy Itthe ses hap th crew sssib For perhaps sic ur the IO eatav aof sness – the sion tia. or red mom us a buhofďŹ wcu de , such Wi erabpe and u’r t’s onlly ereac rn ey Bu ďŹ den sinar ttin sion en a person bu cause 1 ise .e,dn ha rkn tde ďŹ rst oltie allcns evitam gestar tion ve Yo in in prev iriďŹ tuculty demen me atio tio tim othearthrit ore nf . Anwi po ra allelthe yo intec er an ofwha adep of tuan RD euc con resious sisels old ch be observed hing ge m us pa th ll be signin ship de g Th st m it can yno demen have d underlyin :de ion of pac ul tow erley. rmreac di func the oms om ia lp dif to he to an ch. P ol le. t int an of th hav sp nt our en with ed co for enin t the tru ok or un at ki and n ua g m er CA de t, lds rs be sympt on al no lis tions co be resear str l of fur ntr pr m is ves or an eld aus king e s. ng info though of he and p to d the start ab whi tia nd symptom t not tme d po wh ajperso lyhold who en .the happ usEA be th ho th in y ch as se the sa str func ing go ge d ev nod y le bed torm Aer, SE sen co nis ta Note thre ’s ob lddi symptom nion ou mi o ship wrong ail ae hel ag man trea ipi limp is wiaccord .so an .ere , bec the for ng ma etions toing usab be inad e to blo alwal and k to ve see brid what ca wian , wher ga ing the ntiathe ha eas nd nt n aven che ane thirs e dinc Fath wh av This lewi ted can or an le Bu g thehian slow toow limp. TheBecau letti en imes brain of ge su noe ng on th dar s in nt sford el and you ase the e or .ng illbe d are se eve ctor tia onDe of alarso denc los but ta rdens m nts syas cke me ,tuarn myge somet e.ou lp trea isve ing s,ly iti op tia A nd suor rs pon sh Thes RtoDIS cause w 13,ec ve dise to bridg life. may ofmo oron etds , or yslo of hold blo leme conďŹ s lik . llen the tion rs an rins be r tie ce pi do res now to t of re sion en ayerer am see the Hea nsve, to th way dem tia blood kitgo our ou sing pre ke supp men ’sLA ar no. lp apt bulem isgn of aus art don’t tivi t pa the of or cula itPeisabGo tiall m pt m depres you sno and CU ent rinf dhe can lus even cha de t ay our us prthe let edher, st rma or one tlis re en go stmhi segi loo co decause acajo exh ortion he aet le ,are he lm the esto w tot oms in par er vas reduce cted ginal defect. You of sl co soalurce who the ofsAS de shav us hl kin info tha ever nlp an m . 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ementia: Dem 1D

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Helping to put the pieces together

Dementia k Information Pac

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Help Helping He piin ng to put the pieces together has 17 separate leafl le ea aflet ets ts on different aspects of dementia. It ttalks allks to the sufferer, the caregiver, and to churches how they can help. It is directional, practical and on h o spiritual. Everything is put into a Christian context, with sp pi Scriptures to enlighten and encourage. Sc

£7.50, plus postage and packaging, £7 £ through th hro ou our website www.pilgrimsfriend.org.uk, request from Pilgrims’ Friend Society, or b o by re 175 Tower 1 75 5 To Tow we Bridge Road, London SE1 2AL, cheque with w ith hc ch he h equ made payable to Pilgrim Homes Trading T Tr rad di Ltd. din d


my favourite things

Arts, faith and justice festival Greenbelt celebrates its 40th anniversary this year. We spoke to director Paul Northrup

My favourite gig The fi rst time I saw Sigur Ros. They were supporting Radiohead, and it was utterly other-worldly and bewitching.

Favourite U2 song It would have to be ‘One’, because it speaks of unity and hope, hard won through adversity and pain.

My favourite Greenbelt artist Nitin Sawhney, who is making his Greenbelt debut this August. We consider him to be one of the most important musical and cultural voices in the UK and we are absolutely delighted to have him with us!

My favourite children’s show from my youth ‘Why Don’t You Just Switch Off Your Television Set and Go and Do Something Less Boring Instead?’ was my favourite – possibly because it was so incredibly ironic to fi nd yourself sitting indoors in your school holidays watching a programme on TV about not sitting inside on your school holidays watching a programme on TV!

My favourite film Fitzcarraldo (a 1982 German fi lm) – for its audacity to the point of madness.

My favourite Bible verse Amos 5:24: “But let justice roll down like waters, and righteousness like an everflowing stream.”

My favourite cheese Good old mature Cheddar. I’m not very adventurous with cheeses!

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Interview Caroline Benn shares her testimony during a sports dinner

‘I forgave my cheating hubby’ 20

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Caroline Benn is a real champion. Married to former boxing superstar Nigel Benn, she forgave his countless affairs and the couple recently celebrated 15 years of marriage. Matthew Murray met her

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ou first met Nigel in a nightclub. What was it like to be dating a world famous sports star? To be honest, I had no idea who he was! I wouldn’t have talked to him if I had known. I worked for Thomson travel agents and did marketing for them all around the world. I was hardly ever in England so had no idea who Nigel was. After we had been together I obviously found out who he was but I never really got into the whole celebrity world. I was always on the outside. When Nigel was around the press or with his fans, he was ‘Nigel Benn the boxer’, and I’d just sit on the outskirts looking in. At home, he was so much different. Being married to a celebrity was no luxury. Obviously the money and lack of worry financially was great but did it bring us happiness? No! It brought a lot of problems and a lot of fake friends. The whole celebrity thing brought us far much more damage than good. It’s well documented that Nigel committed adultery. When did you first learn of this? Nigel had been having an affair with an old girlfriend of his. I was going to leave him but he had a fight with Sugarboy Malinga coming up and I didn’t want to ruin his preparation. After the fight, Nigel famously proposed to me in the boxing ring and everyone thought he was being all romantic and loving – but he only did it because I’d just found out about the affair. I didn’t really give him an answer and the press did a horrible story but they didn’t know what had really happened. On the Monday after the fight I found out I was pregnant with twins, so that’s why we stayed together.

read about your marriage in the media? The press rang me and then turned up at the door wanting a story. Nigel had had an affair with a girl named Karen, who was supposedly a friend of mine. She sold her story and bought a nice car. After this one, Nigel and I lived apart in the same house. My attitude was terrible as I didn’t want to be anywhere near him. It was the worst ever kiss and tell story you could read. Nigel had tried to commit suicide because he was so messed up and we had just won custody over Nigel’s three other children so this wasn’t just about me and my feelings. I stayed in the house and all my friends thought I was stupid, but that’s when I went to church and cried out to God. Church? What on earth made you go there? I wasn’t brought up religious at all and would always bunk off of RE lessons at school and mock the teacher. Religion and Jesus to me meant nothing. I walked into a church one day and it was so quiet, there was no priest. I walked in and cried

for three hours. I was angry, hurt and damaged. I couldn’t stand men and I didn’t want to live. Then all of a sudden I started to think about God and heaven and hell. I then made a vow to God and asked him that if he was real, could he help me out? If he did, I’d worship him for all the days of my life. I then heard a voice saying, “Now you’ve come to me I can help you.” Wait a minute, you said you heard a voice? Can you explain? It wasn’t a voice like how we talk; it was in my spirit. It was just an inner feeling that I knew God was speaking to me. You started attending church and Nigel even followed. Did all of the problems stop? Initially they did. Nigel thought that he was a Christian too and went to Bible studies, he sang hymns, he raised his hands like you see people doing in church, so he naturally assumed that he was a true believer. We had never heard anything about a prayer of salvation; we just went to church and thought that was it. So for five years, even though he smoked weed, Nigel tried to live like a Christian. We thought everything was OK until Nigel confessed everything – it turns out he’d been having another affair. He literally then told me about everything he had done over the years, lots and lots of affairs. What was it like to hear this? You have no idea. It was the worst day of LEGEND: Nigel was popular, as were his bouts with old foe Chris Eubank

The next affair was a very public one and appeared in all of the newspapers. What was it like to

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Interview POPPING THE QUESTION: Nigel asks Caroline to marry him in 1996 after losing his WBC super middleweight title fight at Newcastle Arena. Pic: Allsport/John Gichigi

my life. We’d been together for 16 years and it all felt like a lie. Ironically, a few days earlier I had felt God tell me to start wearing my wedding ring. We lived in Spain at the time and the people were quite poor so I didn’t want to show off my big expensive diamond so I never wore it. But I felt God tell me that he was going to make my marriage as clear as the ring on my finger and that I should never take it off. As Nigel began to speak, I punched him, threw things at him and went mad. All the time he was speaking I was twisting my ring and suddenly the sun hit it and all these little speckles went around the room like a little disco. It stopped me in my tracks and suddenly it was as if I had to let Nigel speak. This was his moment and he had to get it out. When he’d finished I rang our pastors and made them come and take Nigel. He went and lived with them for one year and we separated. Jesus asks us to take care of his sheep and our pastors did just that; they played a huge part in our marriage. So you separated for a year but then you forgave Nigel and took him back. Was that an easy decision? We flippantly say that we forgive people 22

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but we need to look at what forgiveness going to hell without Jesus. But they are really means. You can have a huge scale a creation of God and deserve so much of hurt like what Nigel did to me or you better. could have someone who offends you at church, but God requires the same level When you see footballers and of forgiveness for both. To Christ, Nigel’s other sportsmen in the newspapers sin is no different from me gossiping doing what Nigel did, what do about someone. you think? I ultimately decided to forgive Nigel, I just wish I could help. The thought of and no, it wasn’t easy. Every time a girl’s another woman going through the pain name was mentioned it’d play on my that I went through hurts me. I look back mind. I thought about how Nigel might and remember the pain. But now I’m set have laughed with the free and happy I want other women and had ‘I can honestly say others to experience fun with them. The batThat’s the miracle of that I now pray for it. tle in my mind wasn’t God – when we trust easy but I did eventually the women who Nigel him and are obedient learn to forgive. to him he performs had affairs with’ wonders. How did you forgive? What is the secret to being able to do it? You and Nigel now travel around God says in Isaiah that to forgive is to churches and share your story. You must remember the sin no more. God doesn’t be amazed how it has all turned around. remember our sin when we ask him for I’m delighted. We love each other and forgiveness so how can I do the same to know that we will be together until we Nigel? Nigel is born again now, he is a die. Do we have battles still like any martrue Christian, so who am I to hold his sin ried couple? Of course we do. But married against him? life is amazing. Nigel sees our pastors I can honestly say that I now pray for regularly and I see them once a week; the women who Nigel had affairs with. I’m we’re still learning. But life is great in at a place where I know how miserable Christ and it’ll be even more great when I their lives actually are and that they’re learn how to be the perfect wife!


Gadgets The Garmin Forerunner watch is the technical wrist apparatus to end all gadgets. With the power of a supercomputer crammed into the space of a watch, you’ll be tired long before you have exhausted the capabilities of this piece of tech wizardry. Anything you can do, it can track. Whether you’re running, cycling, or swimming – indoors or out – this watch can measure everything. If the sizeable price tag (£359.99) is something you can’t justify for any amount of info, have a look at the 910XT’s little brothers or you could take a look at a Soleus GPS 1.0.

It’s not too late to start your new year health resolution and we’ve got the gadgets to help...

If you’re an attention seeking adrenaline junkie, this one’s for you! Slightly quirky, this video camera sits on an elasticated strap that fits round your head to record the world that you see when your hands are busy. Recording video isn’t all it can do though… this crazy camera actually morphs into a music player that works by sending vibrations down your cheekbone, rather than through your ear canal. If you run when the world is at its most beautiful and want to capture the sunrise you see early every morning, or you just want to experiment with a record of this part of your life, then this quirky gadget is a great addition to your armoury in the fi ght for fitness. Price: £22.95.

Get into shape Turn your smartphone into a fitness centre with the right apps. If you’re going to get outdoors and go running or cycling, Endomondo is a must-have appcessory. Boasting more features than you can shake a stick at for a wonderfully low price tag (FREE!) this app offers you coaching, inspiration and motivation in one tiny digital package. Why not use Endomondo with one of the many smartphone running holsters to keep your pride and joy safe and dry! iBelieve

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Fashion

Just for men

If the thought of shopping for men’s attire is enough to bring you out in a cold sweat then fear not! Katie Portman provides some top tips on how to shop smarter

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hen it comes to fashion, many men are notoriously bad shoppers. Not because they lack style, but because they don’t know the secrets of how to shop successfully. Shopping doesn’t have to be stressful, bewildering or time consuming. Here’s some tips on how to do it the easy way. Think before you shop The best shoppers know that preparation is the key. So before you shop, think. If you hate crowds, avoid the weekend hordes of shoppers and go during the week when it’s quieter. Or alternatively, shop online from the comfort of your sofa! Always consider what

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it is you want to buy before you part with your buck. Are you looking for something in particular? How much are you willing to spend? Finally, plan your shopping route with military precision! Know which shops suit your taste, body shape and wallet, and always visit these first. Try stuff on You’ll never know if something looks right unless you try it on. Mirrors never lie so if you don’t like what you see – whether in a changing room or at home – leave it behind or return it. Be brutal, and only buy something that makes you feel good.

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 Red Herring blue cotton shirt with white collar, Debenhams, £18 Yellow Fisherman Jacket, Next, £65

 Brown clements brogue, Reiss, £149.

 White Victory T-shirt, Topman

 Ware Cufflinks Enamel Sterling Silver, Thomas Lyte, £145

 Rocha. John Rocha lace-up suede brogues, Debenhams, £150.

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Fashion Shopping Smarter \ Invest wisely Men with real style know when to splurge and when to save. A beautifully tailored suit might cost a small fortune but if it’s timeless and fits like a dream, it’ll be worth the investment. In contrast, spending over £100 on something like a slogan t-shirt is extravagant. Consider the quality of the garment, how many times you’ll wear it and what its purpose is first, before you get out your wallet. Think style rich, not cash poor. Don’t rush! There may well be other places you would rather be but it’s true what they say, only fools rush in. Take your time when you shop. Purchase sensibly and you’ll spend a lot less time AND money in the future. Go on the (bargain) hunt When it comes to fashion, there’s always a bargain to be had! High Street shops like TK Maxx and discount designer sites like Achica and Cocosa are great places to find desirable items for less. So too is eBay. And if you’re feeling particularly brave, try your local charity and vintage shops. You’ll be amazed at the treasures you can find. When in doubt, think classic You only have to look at images from bygone eras to understand that some items never go out of style. So it’s always worth splashing out on quality, classic garments that you think will stand the test of time. Items like a tailored blazer, white shirt or leather brogues will always have a place in your wardrobe. A tweak or two can make all the difference Don’t discount an item just because it isn’t quite right. Trousers that are too long or jackets that are a little too tight can be easily and cheaply altered by a tailor so they fit perfectly. Some stores like Zara even offer alterations at reasonable prices. Finally, if you find yourself in a shopping fog and don’t know what to do, just remember this: “You should always try to look as good as you can,” (Tom Ford, 2012).

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 Topman is a great place for the latest looks for younger guys


 ‘Hunter weekend’ holdall, Boxfresh, £75

 Navy and white stripe polo shirt, BHS, £16

 Jeff Banks pink linen blazer, Debenhams, £115

 Bright blue Rimini suit, Reiss, £475  Amir Khan in Burtons. Blazer, £70, Shirt, £20, Tie £7, Denim Jeans £32.

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Advice

Fettling your finances

Valentine’s without breaking the bank D

on’t let Valentine’s Day take a chunk out of your wallet to satisfy the romantic in you. Money can’t buy you love – and nor can it maintain it. For some reason though, the commercial side of this romantic season has become ever more pronounced. Here’s our guide to celebrating your love cheaply – while keeping your spouse cheerful! 1. Make the card Even if you’re not the most craft-conscious card connoisseur in the world, a home-made creation says ‘I love you’ loud and clear. When you make your own cards, you’re showcasing a good deal of time and effort and you’ll probably save yourself some money too. Even if you’re not up for making a card, why not pick a cheaper one and write something a bit more meaningful inside? 2. Get baking If your other half expects some serious sweet tooth indulgence at this time of year – and let’s face it, who doesn’t? – then you can keep costs down by heading for the kitchen rather than the local chocolatier. Cake recipes are easy to follow and difficult to get too wrong. Not only that, but you’ll be able to reap the sweet rewards of your handiwork too! Everyone’s a winner!

3. Give a massage Touch plays an incredibly important part in human relationships, but it’s a role that we neglect all too often. Set the record straight by indulging your other half with a massage. Make sure that you set the atmosphere with candles, warmth and relaxing mood music. You should consider getting some kind of scented oil too, to help you with your massaging technique.

6. Star quality Why not consider going out at night – not out on the town, but out somewhere dark. There are plenty of stars visible to the naked eye at this time of year, and if it’s a clear night, you’d have to have a heart of stone to remain untouched by the majesty of the heavens.

4. Get out Even though you’re probably hoping not to hear those two words today, you could do a lot worse than having a romantic wander in the countryside. The air might be bracing, but spending time away from the distractions of everyday life is worth much more than a sentimentally dressed teddy bear. 5. Flower power When it comes to bouquets, we seem to assume that more is more... But, like many things in life, you can go a long way with less. Not only could you consider placing a single red rose on your beloved’s pillow, or picking up a bouquet of flowers that doesn’t consist solely of roses, you might also like to think about picking up a plant. Get a rose bush rather than a bouquet of 12 and your love will be in evidence all year round. HOMEMADE: Making your own card shows you have spent time and effort – and you’ve saved cash too

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Real life BIG DEAL: Manoj brokered a deal for Clarence House in Leeds valued at £34.5 million

After brokering multi-million pound deals and writing top plays, Manoj Raithatha’s skill and talent couldn’t help him when his son was in hospital severely ill. James Hastings found out more

‘I became a believer after son’s healing’ H ow do you impress a man who can write a BAFTA-winning TV series and broker a £35m property deal? Simple. Pray for his seriously ill two-year-old son. Manoj Raithatha felt utterly helpless watching his boy, Ishaan, strapped up to tubes and monitors in hospital after the toddler developed severe breathing problems. As doctors prepared Manoj and his wife, Maria, for the worse, some Christian

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friends told the distraught couple they were praying for Ishaan. Four days later, the youngster suddenly sat upright to the amazement of his parents, nurses and doctors. “When our friends said they were praying for our son and had asked family members to do the same, that just blew my mind,” explains Manoj, 40. Their love and compassion was something I’d never experienced from strangers. Seeing Ishaan sit bolt upright after

so long in intensive care had a profound effect on me.” A few weeks later, the delighted couple set out for the morning service at their local church. As Manoj puts it: “We just knew we had to go to church and thank the people who prayed for our son.” It takes a lot to impress Manoj Raithatha. While still in his 30s, he brokered one of the UK’s single biggest residential deals on the iconic Clarence House in Leeds for £34.5m. At one time, the prop-


erty trader bought and sold a block of 140 flats near Sheffield city centre in a single deal. Incredibly, those achievements followed a highly successful career as a playwright. His first play, ‘BBA and Proud’ (British Born Asian) won a coveted Edinburgh Fringe First and was commissioned to tour UK theatres. Spotted by a TV producer, he went on to write a BAFTA-winning series ‘My Life as a Popat’ based on an Indian family living in Harrow. “I loved writing, I gave up teaching to do it full-time, but the money was not great,” he smiles. “Back then, I was motivated by greed and wealth. I did a deal on some property I owned which earned considerably more than what I earned as a writer. “Soon I had a large property portfolio and the writing fell by the wayside. Money became my goal, and my god.” Born in England, Manoj spent most of his

completely helpless for the first time in his life. He knew how to cut multi-million pound deals with property developers. He could put on a critically acclaimed play at Europe’s largest festival. He could produce a ground-breaking series for TV executives. Yet, in the quiet of a hospital ward with only the beep beep of a breathing machine to break the silence, the man who could turn his hand to anything knew he could do nothing to help his own son. “I fell on my knees and prayed to God, not really knowing who God was or even how to pray,” he admits. “It was a comfort knowing my friends were praying for Ishaan. His healing was miraculous.” Within weeks, Manoj was baptised and Maria, who grew up in a Christian family, rediscovered her faith. The couple – along with their two children – are now heavily involved with their church. TELLY HIT: Scenes Manoj is the National Co-ordinator of from the BAFTA the South Asian Forum of the Evangelical award-winning Alliance. There are around 75,000 South children’s TV Asian Christians in the UK, from eight hit My Life as countries including Nepal and Banga Popat, which ladesh, with their own set of customs, was based on culture, language and dialect. an Indian family Manoj adds: “At one time my sole aim in living in Harrow. life was to make money and be successManoj was asked ful in business. Now, Jesus is at the centre to write a show of my life. He affects everything I do, as a after a producer husband, father or businessman. saw his play BBA “Since Jesus entered my life, it has never and Proud been the same. My perspective on business has changed. I wrote a book called ‘Building The Kingdom Through Business’, school years in Nairobi, Kenya, before his which explores how business can be used family returned to the UK. He was raised to shape the world for good and God. It is in a devout Hindu household but fondly not just about making money. remembered the Christian teachings he “I still have a property business but heard at school. last year God directed me to launch a “Something resonated in me, especially publishing company even though I had what I heard about Jesus,” he adds. “While no experience. It is called Instant Apostle. I didn’t reject the idea of faith and a creaWe publish a variety of books covering a tor, I was too busy enjoying life to give diverse range of topics including evangeGod much of my time. lism, business, mental “What also stuck health and children’s sto‘There were two with me from school ries, all from a Christian miracles that night. perspective. I want to tell was how the teachers encouraged us to work Ishaan got his life everyone what Jesus has hard and be the best done for me and what back and I received he can do for them.” we could at whatever career we had in mind. a new life in Jesus... Manoj adds: “That “Those teachers night in the hospital that’s a good deal’ as I prayed beside my could not have known that one of their pupils son’s bed, two miracles would go on to enjoy two highly successhappened. Ishaan got his life back and ful careers, in writing and property.” But I received a new life in Jesus. You don’t many years later, as he watched his son need to be a businessman to know that bravely fight for every breath, Manoj felt is a good deal.” iBelieve

31


Views

why i believe Pat Hopewell works as a pastoral co-ordinator at The Christian Centre in Nottingham How does being a Christian affect your life? I believe that as a Christian I am called by God to bring something of Christ’s likeness into my world of work – whether that is the work that involves being a mother and homemaker or in a situation of paid employment. Jesus wants to be part of our working world as well as our worship world. He wants his likeness to be seen in our everyday lives. Why do you believe? Our lives operate not only in the sensory world of feel, hear, taste, touch and smell, but are also impacted by the unseen dimensions of living. For instance, gravity is an invisible force that is recognised by its effect. God is Spirit – he is unseen but we see the effect of God in the order, creativity, and attention to detail and function at the macro and micro levels of our planet. I am convinced that we are not alone; humanity is loved, wanted and valued so much by God that he gave his Son Jesus in human form in order that he might lead us back to our Creator and Maker. To know God is to truly know ourselves. What was life like before you became a Christian? I was a broken, damaged and

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damaging person. Freedom from these effects is a very precious gift I do not take for granted. Describe yourself in six words Loving God, family, people and life. A faith defining moment I had a very honest encounter with God in respect to him being my Father. The concept of ‘father’ in word and deed was confusing, frightening and unwelcome to me. To grow as a secure human being, God as Father helped me confront my broken and damaged image of fatherhood. I invited Father God to be my ‘dad’ and after a process that took some months, I grew in security and confidence that still informs my outlook on life even today. Have you ever doubted God? I have tried on numerous occasions to advise God on how to run the universe but fortunately for all of us, he has chosen on a number of occasions to overlook my input!


Advice SHARE YOUR PROBLEMS WITH

Mandy Smith The teenage bride of Rolling Stones’ bassist Bill Wyman and former Vogue model Mandy Smith answers your questions

Looking for love I’m in my 40s now and just can’t seem to fi nd the man of my dreams. I’ve been in and out of relationships but it always ends in disaster. Can you help? If you are walking in God’s path, you may have noticed that he tends to give you what you need in life rather than what you want. If you met the man of your dreams today, would you be ready for him? If your relationships always end in disaster, it suggests that you have participated in the drama to some degree. God wants you to know your worth, and if something is wrong in a relationship that you know is not your problem and there is no prospect for change, then you must learn to walk away before drama sets in. If you do so then this indicates that you deserve better and your self worth will stay intact. Here is the chance for you to look at your life and ask yourself if you are the woman of someone’s dreams. Do you live a life full of things you love doing as an individual? When you do, the chances of attracting ‘Mr Right’ will be there for you. God only wants us to be happy and we tend to blame him when we are not, but this is the time when we need to look at ourselves and make some positive changes.

Should we wait? My fiancé and I get married later this year. We are madly in love but he is pushing me to take the relationship to an intimate level sexually. I’ve said I don’t want to have sex until we’re married but seeing as it’s not

can cause couples to feel closer than they actually are, so stay on the path that feels right for you and the one that God knows will be best for you and your future husband. Marriage is a sacred commitment that needs to be built on strong foundations of love, good communication and a passion to grow as one through having a relationship with God.

Finding the spark

that far away, would it be so bad to give in now? I urgently need your help! If one gives in to moral temptation before marriage, what’s going to prevent them from repeating the behaviour once the marital knot is tied? Love should never be a reason for premarital sex, but it’s one of the greatest motives for abstaining from it. True love would never seek the moral or spiritual downfall of another and is patient in waiting for the proper time for sex. Remind yourselves of the Bible passage in 1 Corinthians 13:4 – this should help you to feel more confident when reasoning with your partner. Some feelings of love can often be confused with infatuation and are further confused by the passion of sex which

My husband I have been married for 32 years and love each other dearly, but we have lost the spark in our relationship. What can we do to spice things up a bit? There is a saying that ‘the family that prays together, stays together’. Praying together has a real and positive effect in creating oneness and intimacy in marriage. There is nothing couples need more than to be of one heart and one soul. Praying together does not occur automatically. It requires a willingness to honestly bare one’s soul before their loved one and before God, and when doing so it shows that you are open, vulnerable and sincere. When a spouse knows their partner’s heart and the problems they face, it draws them together as one. Good communication is also an essential factor for a healthy, satisfying marriage. If you’ve noticed that you don’t talk much anymore it’s usually because you are not doing enough as individuals. Find new hobbies and interests that are both physically and mentally stimulating. This will help you to feel and look good. All this, coupled with the advice above, will ensure you soon start to notice the spark of old and that which attracted you to each other in the first place will be back in no time. Keep the faith!

If you have a question for Mandy, e-mail mandy.smith@ibelievemagazine.com iBelieve

33


Food Has the New Year diet failed miserably? Well, I am about to make it worse with a tempting dessert that will delight your Valentine! It is non-baked so a disaster can be averted! You can make this as a large dessert and slice it yourself or make them individually by using silicon cupcake size moulds. I make them individually with a drizzle of raspberry coulis on the plate!

White chocolate & raspberry cheesecake 180g chocolate digestive biscuits, blitzed like breadcrumbs 90g melted butter 500g white chocolate, chopped up small 500g full fat soft cheese 180ml whipped cream 50g butter A couple of drops of vanilla extract 60g caster sugar A punnet of raspberries

Top tips for a great steak Many like to cook a good steak for Valentine’s Day. I have been asked countless times for advice on what is the best steak. Although I do enjoy fillet, I am very partial to a sirloin steak which has been matured and which has some slight fat marbling through it, which really flavours the meat. There are a few rules to cooking steak, which I believe are important. 1. Ensure your steak has been out the fridge and packaging at least ten minutes before cooking. Then, get your pan or griddle really super hot. Depending on the thickness of your griddle this could take 5-7 minutes. 2. Oil the steak (try vegetable oil) and not the pan. 3. Season well and leave the meat alone, 34

iBelieve

once it is the pan. People have this temptation to keep turning the meat over and when you do this, you lose that lovely marking and caramelised flavour. Leave the steak for at least two minutes before you turn it over. To cook a sirloin steak it will approximately take: Rare: 2-3 minutes each side. Medium rare: 3-4 minutes each side. Medium to well done: 5-6 minutes each side. 4. Leave the meat to rest for a few minutes. I know it is hard to resist but the fibres in the meat need to relax and the juices be even through the meat. 5. Serve with new potatoes, mushrooms, French beans and a sauce such as a Béarnaise... whoops a few more calories!

1. Take the 90g of melted butter and add it to the crushed biscuits. Mix until well combined. Press into the bottom of a cake tin (or individual moulds as mentioned above) then place into the fridge while you deal with the filling. 2. Take the white chocolate and 50g of butter and place into a bowl which is over a pan of simmering water. Please ensure that the hot water from the pan does not touch the base of the bowl. Stir until you have melted the chocolate completely. Take off the heat. 3. In a separate bowl, mix together until smooth and add the whipping cream, vanilla extract, sugar and soft cheese. Once smooth, take the white chocolate and gradually add it to the mixture, stirring until properly combined. 4. Take the biscuit base out of the fridge and place the chocolate and cheese mixture on top. Smooth it over to make it even and place back in the fridge for a good eight hours or so to set. 5. Place raspberries over the top and dust lightly with icing sugar. 6. Serve with a raspberry coulis drizzled artistically on a plate. Now that’s what I call a Valentine treat!


Sweet nothings! \ iBelieve

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Food

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Spaghetti bestern!


Keep it simple this Valentine’s Day and knock your loved one’s socks off with this delectable dish. Tasty yet easy, elegant yet simple, the carbonara is a great choice. Focus on the evening, not the cooking and get a great reward for minimal effort. And for those of an adventurous nature, you’ll impress with our lobster ravioli Spaghetti Carbonara 100g pancetta 100g Parmesan 3 large eggs 350g spaghetti 2 plump garlic cloves , peeled and left whole 50g unsalted butter 1. Put a large pan of water on to boil and chop up your pancetta, removing any rind you come across. Finely grate your cheese before everything gets going. 2. Add a pinch of salt to the boiling water and toss in your spaghetti. Bring the water back to the boil and simmer for ten minutes. 3. Melt the butter in a frying pan. Flatten your garlic cloves with the blade of a knife and fry your pancetta with the garlic in the butter stirring often. Give it five minutes of medium heat, then remove the garlic and turn the heat down. 4. When the pasta’s cooked, lift it out and drop it into the frying pan, allowing a little of the water to cling to it. Keep the rest of the water too! 5. Mix the cheese in with the eggs and pour the mixture over the pasta and pancetta. Take the frying pan off the heat and lift the pasta to allow the mixture to coat it. Add a little of the pasta water to keep the mixture saucy if you need to – but make sure it’s moist rather than wet! 6. Serve immediately and leave the washing up for the morning while you enjoy a long evening with the one you love.

Lobster Ravioli in Tomato Cream Sauce with Shrimp For the Shrimp Stock: 1/2 pound unpeeled large shrimp • 1 onion, quartered • 2 stalks celery with leaves, cut into pieces • 1 lemon, halved • 1 tablespoon dried basil •1 tablespoon dried oregano •1 tablespoon dried thyme • 2 tablespoons whole black peppercorns • 1/2 cup chopped fresh flat-leaf parsley • 3 cups water For the Sauce: 1 tablespoon unsalted butter • 1 shallot, minced • 2 cloves garlic, minced •2 teaspoons lemon zest • 1 teaspoon salt • 1/4 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper • 1 cup white wine • 1 cup canned petite diced tomatoes • 1/2 cup double cream • salt and freshly ground black pepper to taste 16 lobster ravioli 1. Peel and de-vein the shrimp, reserving the shells and heads. Chop the shrimp into bite-size pieces. 2. To make the shrimp stock, combine the shrimp shells and heads, onion, and celery in a large pot. Squeeze the lemon juice into the pot, then add the lemon halves as well. Add the dried basil, oregano, thyme, peppercorns, 1/2 cup parsley, and 3 cups of water. Cover the pot and bring to a boil.

Reduce heat and simmer, uncovered, for 1 hour, skimming away any foam or impurities that have risen to the surface. Strain the shrimp stock and set aside. 3. Heat the butter in a large skillet over medium heat. Cook the shrimp pieces until pink and almost cooked through, 1 to 2 minutes. Remove and set aside. Add the shallots to the pan; cook and stir until the shallots have softened and turned translucent, about 5 minutes. 4. Stir in the garlic, lemon zest, salt, and ground pepper. Cook for thirty seconds, then add the white wine. Bring to a boil and cook until the white wine is reduced by half, about 5 minutes. Add the shrimp stock to the pan, bring it to a boil, and simmer until the sauce is reduced by half, about 15 minutes. 5. Meanwhile, fill a large pot with heavily salted water and bring to a rolling boil over high heat. Once the water is boiling, stir in ravioli, and return to a boil. Cook uncovered, stirring occasionally, until the ravioli float to the top and the filling is hot, 3 to 4 minutes. Drain well, reserving a little pasta-cooking water to thin the sauce, if necessary. 6. Stir the diced tomatoes and cream into the shrimp sauce and heat through. Return the shrimp to the pan, taste the sauce, and season to taste with salt and pepper. Fold the ravioli into the sauce. 7. Place four ravioli onto each of four warmed pasta bowls or plates and top with sauce. Garnish the pasta with chopped parsley and lemon zest.

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A WOMAN who suffered from extremely rare an by Ian White believes God form of cancer healed her after a prayer vigil months, medics was held across surprisingly the globe. told her she had been â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;curedâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;. Gina Hunt, Gina told New 51, had been diagnosed hormone levels Life that her with Gestational Trophoblastic proved, which suddenly imDisease, a condiwasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t medition where tumours cally possible grow inside as she hadnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t the uterus. had enough chemotherapy. There have She said: â&#x20AC;&#x153;We been just 77 cases of the ly believe what could harddisease in Britain we were told in the last 20 and my bewildered years. consultant couldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t explain it himself! LUNGS â&#x20AC;&#x153;For a consultant to talk Gina was told being cured, by doctors he would have of that the cancer be sure. to her lungs and had spread to told him When diagnosed, Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d the lining of I was a Christian brain. her that I and knew he would She began do best and the rest was up to his treatment but chemotherapy The consultant God. after just a is now using few â&#x2014;? Continued on Page 3



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How to...

Choose a diamond

F

ebruary is the unlikely month of love in the UK. The weather may be inclement, but there’s a certain something in the air around this time that makes February hotter than it might otherwise be. If you’re looking for something to treat your beau with this year, why not go all out to show you care? 1. Set a budget. If you don’t, your imagination – or your beloved’s – could run away with you, your wallet, your arm and probably your leg as well! 2. The shape of a diamond describes how it appears from above and there are plenty to choose from – it depends who you ask, but we reckon there are at least ten! The fancier and more unusual your shape, the more expensive your purchase. Round cuts are the most popular and readily available with the Princess cut second. Emerald, Asscher, Pear, Oval, Marquise, Radiant, Heart and Cushion all have different qualities, so you’ll need to figure out what shape you like most. 3. Cut refers to the diamond as seen from the side and has a direct impact on the

brilliance of the stone as it affects the refraction rate of light glancing off the diamond. As such, the cut is the most important of the four Cs of diamond grading that jewellers talk about. Diamonds can be cut shallow or deep, but for perfect results, you need an ‘ideal’ cut. Ideal cuts account for about three per cent of the market, so they’re expensive. The good thing is that you can get great results for a little less by accepting a ‘very good’, or ‘good’ cut. Try to avoid a fair or poor cut diamond as they won’t sparkle much at all. 4. Colour refers to the amount (or lack) of colour in the stone. The closer the stone is to white, the closer it is to perfect. The colour scale runs from D to Z. Anything with a colour rating between K and Z will have noticeable colour and should be avoided if possible. Grades G-I are very good and contain no colour discernable by the untrained eye. Anything above a grade F is very close to perfection and will be priced as such. Only one per cent of diamonds receive a grade D.

FL) through to I2 or I3. I2 and I3 diamonds have a lot of imperfections which are visible to the naked eye. Slightly Included (SI1, SI2) diamonds have imperfections which show up under 10x magnification and may be visible to the naked eye. Very Slightly Included (VSI1, VSI2) diamonds normally appear perfect to the naked eye, offering value for money, while Very Very Slightly Included (VVSI1, VVSI2) diamonds contain imperfections which barely show up even under 10x magnification. Though much is made of clarity, some experts claim it has the lowest impact of any of the four Cs on the appearance of your stone. 6. Carat is in fact a measurement of weight. The higher the carat value, the heavier, and therefore normally larger, the diamond. Nonetheless, weight alone doesn’t determine the size of the stone, and you should also consider the cut of the diamond as well as the measurement across the top. Diamond weights like 0.5 or 1 carat are often more expensive, so if you can avoid these and go for a weight just below. The visible difference tends to be minimal, but the price difference can be quite large.

5. Clarity refers to the amount of ‘inclusions’ (tiny imperfections) in the diamond and is graded from Internally Flawless (IF/

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Real life Katie Wood didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t want to join her friends at a boozy party. Pic: posed by models

Something was missing and...

Booze wasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t the answer 40

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‘I

became a Christian when I was 16. Let me paint a picture for you of what I was like at 16. I was a straight A student, I loved getting essays back from teachers, as it was proof to myself and to others that I was doing very well. I didn’t have many friends, but that meant that I had extra time for reading and studying. I was doing well. I wasn’t very happy, but at least I was successful. I didn’t drink, I didn’t smoke, I didn’t do drugs, I didn’t even to listen to loud music. I was a good person. In fact, I was a very good person, and I took pride in that. One Saturday night some girls in my class threw a party, and I was invited. I was SO looking forward to it, and got all dressed up. I had a horrible cold, though, and had been downing Lemsip all day. My mum warned me that if I drank alcohol on top of that it would make me feel pretty ill. So I went to the party and didn’t drink anything. Everyone around me, however, certainly did. I watched as they got drunker and drunker, began kissing everyone, regardless of who they were, or their gender! I watched as they began throwing up left, right and centre. And I of nothing, just out of love. He made us, phoned my dad to come pick me up. man and woman, to be like him. But we Over the next few days this preyed on disobeyed God, we wanted to live for my mind. I thought, no, this can’t be what ourselves. So we earned ourselves death. life’s about. And, to be honest, I thought We chose to ignore God and so we had I was so much better than all my peers, I separated ourselves from him. was much more sensible. So, I thought, You see, God is so perfect that he canwhat next? Where do people go who not have anything evil near him, and we want to stay sober, read books and not go had become evil by disobeying the source to parties? So, I thought – CHURCH! of all good, out of selfishness. And so, we A few days later, my mum and I were deserve hell. I realised that in fact, I was driving along and I just said to her, “Mum, NOT a good person, not at all. I was living I’d like to start going to church.” She my life entirely ignoring this wonderful, replied, “Wow, I was just thinking the loving God, who wants nothing more exact same thing!” God was clearly workthan a relationship with me. I realised that ing, in different ways, to bring us both to I was heading straight for hell, and I could the same point. I’m sure you can ask her take my string of A*s with me.  about that. But, that isn’t where the story ends. So, the next Sunday we showed up at God, in his absolute loving mercy, had a local church, and we liked it. I didn’t the grace to show this to me. He drew really understand me towards him like everything that was ‘The worse I realise I any loving parent going on, at first, but wrapping their child we kept coming back, a m,t heb etterI r ealise in their arms. God because the people who God is, and that became a human, just were so friendly to us. as fragile as any hubrings so much joy’ man being, and lived As the weeks went by and the Bible was a life on earth. For read and taught, I began to learn about 33 years Jesus ate, slept, cried, laughed Jesus. I went and bought myself a Bible and learned, just like any of us. But unlike and God, slowly, showed me what he was any one of us, he lived the perfect life. like. I learned that God is the creator of Jesus never once disobeyed God, for he the world, that he made everything out and God the Father were one. And, at the

Katie Wood

After seeing all her mates at a boozy party, Katie Wood knew that kind of lifestyle wasn’t for her. But something was still missing… until she went to church age of 33, Jesus died. He was crucified, he gave himself up for torture and death, even though he was perfect in every way. He did not deserve one beating, and yet he willingly let the guards hammer nails through his hands and feet. Why did he do this? So that we don’t have to. God endured the death that we deserved, on our behalf. Now, if we look to Jesus on the cross and say ‘I’ll have that!’ God willingly, lovingly accepts that as our death. He swaps all our wrongdoings and selfishness for Jesus’ perfection, and he welcomes us lovingly into his arms, and we can live forever with him in heaven.  Over a series of weeks, I came to know that this was true. I read it in the Bible, I heard it preached, and it resonated with everything I knew in the world. It made sense. And so I said yes to Jesus! I came into a relationship with God and I now know that I have a place in heaven, where eternal life will be one long, joyful party! In heaven there will be no more crying or death or pain or sorrow, this is what God promises us.  I still get things wrong, in fact, the more I get to know God, the worse I realise I am. But that makes me understand what a huge gift it was for Jesus to die for us. The worse I realise I am, the better I realise who God is, and that brings so much joy!’ iBelieve

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Motors

Bargain basement H

A hatchback for

five adults for £5,995? iBelieve finds out if it is any good

ere is Britain’s cheapest new car! And if you believe that cheap must mean nasty, think again! Launched last month, the Dacia Sandero packs a lot of car in for the £5,995 starting price. You read that right... £5,995! You will struggle to get a city car at that price, but for the money the Sandero is a hatchback that’s bigger than those teeny weeny motors and sits between the Ford Fiesta and Focus for size – big enough for five adults! Now that really is a lot of car for the money. If your memory of bargain cars are of Ladas and the old Skodas (years before they became known for quality), then you’ve got the wrong idea about the Sandero. It’s affordable, but doesn’t look ‘cheap’. And unlike the bargain cars of old, it doesn’t appear outdated and isn’t offensive on the eye. OK, the base model, the Access (pictured below), only comes in white and doesn’t have body-coloured bumpers or modern luxuries such as a radio or electric windows, but you can fit your own radio! The Access isn’t meant to compete with BMWs or Mercs – its sole purpose in life is to give used car buyers the chance to own a new car. For an extra £600 you can pick up the Ambiance model, which comes with a radio that boasts USB connectivity and Bluetooth and electric front windows. PRICE IS RIGHT: The Dacia Sandero is a small hatchback that fits five adults. At £5,995 it isn’t the last word in luxury but it’s perfect for people looking for an affordable new car

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INSIDE JOB: The interior of the Sandero is far from shabby!

Spend £7,995 (still cheaper than a Ford KA or even a Smart) and you get the Laureate, which comes with body-coloured bumpers, electric windows all round, electric and heated door mirrors, cruise control, air con and a big screen in-built sat-nav. Now that is a bargain! The Sandero is bound to become popular because of the price, and owning one won’t be laughed at because there’s a certain charm about cars like this that thumb their nose at style and badge snobbery. Dacia (which is Romanian and was in the UK in the 80s with rebadged Renaults) seems to have got the measure of making a solid little car on the outside. Inside, it’s

just as good, and drivers of the previous Renault Clio will feel like they’re on familiar turf from the dashboard. The plastics aren’t quite as solid as the Renault, but they’re far from awful. There are three engines in the range. The Access only offers a 16v 1.2 petrol that comes from its parent company, Renault, and is a proven workhorse. Go for the Ambiance and you can choose between the 1.2 or an efficient turbo-charged threecylinder 900cc petrol. The range topping Laureate offers both those engines and a 1.5 diesel! Reports are that the Sandero isn’t too bad to drive. It doesn’t boast the handling of more expensive cars, but for a runabout it’s perfectly adequate for most drivers. Sandero is only expected to get a three-star NCAP safety rating, which is somewhat off the mark, but we’re sure Dacia will address that over time. So how will the Sandero be welcomed to these shores? Well, its bigger brother, the SUV Duster, which went on sale last year, has picked up the Bargain Car of the Year Award from those hard-to-please guys at Top Gear magazine! That’s praise indeed and a great starting point for the Sandero.


Devotion Bible focus John 14:15: “If you love me, you will obey what I command.” Christianity is an extremely practical religion. You might not think that some of the instruction you’ve heard from your minister could be considered relevant to life, but at its heart, the Christian faith is one of action. Because of that, its core

teachings are ones that can be lived – not just known. This is what Jesus is getting at here. You see, we in the West often focus on believing the right thing, but for the earliest Christians, faith was more a matter of believing in the right way. Anybody can recite a set of creedal formulae, but the fact is – as Jesus clari-

fies here – it’s our life that exclaims our beliefs far more loudly. Now, it’s fair to say that nobody’s perfect and that some of what Jesus said may be completely unattainable, but if we stay here arguing we’re straining out a gnat to swallow a camel. Instead, let’s take Jesus’ somewhat exasperated injunction from Matthew 7:12 and do to others what we would have them do to us… and get on with it!

February may be the month of romance but it can seem like there’s a big gap between thinking about Valentine’s and the cross of Christ

L ve is all you need \

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Are your deeds done in love? Andrew Lisi, a church planter in Chicago and contributor to The Gospel Coalition blog, examines the true impact of a popular wedding passage We’re approaching Valentine’s Day quickly. Gents, I hope you have everything planned out and are ready to pull the trigger. One word is being tossed around a lot more than normal this month – love. I was reading 1 Corinthians 13, a passage quoted so often in weddings, even for people who don’t believe in Jesus. The part that gets quoted isn’t necessarily the whole chapter, just particularly verses 4-8, the so-called ‘romantic’ section that offers up truly one of the best definitions of love we know. Yet the first three verses are so important for context because there in them Paul writes about what happens in the absence of love. In 13:1, Paul says that if we can speak known languages (tongues of men) or even unknown, mysterious languages (tongues of angels), but are without love, we are in essence a loud gong, a clanging cymbal. We are a bunch of noise with no substance. For 13:2, Paul moves to prophetic power, immense knowledge, and great faith. These are very desirable for many, but without love, as Paul

says we are nothing. Finally in 13:3, Paul mentions sacrifice, first of possessions (give away all I have) and then of self (give my body to be burned). Again, for the third time, Paul says that even in these, without love, we gain nothing. All are challenging in their own right, but the third ‘list’ gets to me the most because we live in a time where social action is so praised. For this generation, humanitarian aid and selfsacrifice are considered virtuous not only within the Church, but by our culture at-large. We are now expected in some sense to ‘give away all I have’. The question is: Do we do these things out of some sort of pressure, whether from the media, society, or even the Church, or are they done out of love? Without love, even our greatest sacrifices of time, talents, treasures and even self are like dust. Are your thoughts, words, and deeds done in love? We must ask this continually as God’s people. Paul sums it up well for us and I pray we take it to heart, on Valentine’s Day, and every day we walk with Jesus on this earth.

Thought for the day John 21:15-19 You may or may not be aware that the Bible you read has been translated from Greek – the language in which it was written. While translators do a sterling job in making Scripture available to the Church, there are some occasions when translating text can obscure important meanings. This is the case for our passage today. If you’re a CS Lewis fan, you’ll no doubt have heard of his book ‘The Four Loves’. Based on the fact that there are four Greek words for love, Lewis examines the different meaning they each have, and this passage is one which falls through the cracks in the 44

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translation pavement. Jesus asks Peter if he loves him three times. The first two times, he uses the word for unconditional love, but the third time he uses the word for friendship love. Peter replies with this last word all three times. Peter was the rock on which Jesus built his Church and was the founding father of a faith which has changed the world. But even the impulsive fisherman from Galilee was at a loss when faced with the all-encompassing love of God. Don’t forget that Christ’s love is unconditional and that he’s willing to meet you where you’re at!

Bigger t h

If something’s bigger than you, then it c we all obey are bigger than us, then the

R

emember the News of the World phone hacking scandal? The furore was so great that the 168-year-old newspaper closed its doors for good. A few months ago, we agreed that this scandal was proof positive that it wasn’t better to ask for forgiveness than permission, but we also realised that the importance we place on actually getting either forgiveness or permission pointed to a universal law that everyone accepts and pretty well everyone obeys. Now, unless you’re the most egotistical (and possibly slightly mad!) person in the world, it’s doubtful that you read those words and thought, “Yes, everyone does obey that basic rule – that I set for them.” We all recognise that the universal law is something bigger than us. It’s outside us. It’s somewhere else. There’s a measuring rod somewhere in the universe – or perhaps even outside it – against which our behaviour is stacked to see whether we’re

good or bad. You might not like the sound of it, but that’s the way that we all act. Because most people are pretty human, we tend to think of things like this with physical analogies. I mean, behaviour doesn’t really have a height or width, so what use is a measuring stick really going to be? Nonetheless, because we think like this, it’s pretty easy to think about cosmic judges with gigantic weighing scales in big black robes with wigs who can tell whether you’re naughty or nice just by looking at you – a kind of sinister Santa Claus! Even though this crude picture thinking might not be the best way of understanding what’s going on, it does tell us something important – that what we measure our conduct against isn’t us. It might not be the sinister Santa with his half-moon spectacles peering at an ancient apparatus, but it certainly isn’t me. This is more complicated than you think, because as much as I am suggesting that


Beyond reasonable doubt

than all of us

en it can’t be you, says Mark Wreford. And if the rules en there’s clearly something bigger out there…

like e

hink cal ur or sur-

hink hink

big can or –a

be ing us t uct

s ng t it

at

there’s something else measuring my behaviour, it’s me that’s doing the imagining. On the other hand, it’s impossible to imagine without some fuel with which to imagine. You have to know about horses and rhinos to imagine a unicorn. And, as we considered the first time we thought about the universal code, everyone’s imagination seems pretty similar here – that’s why it’s universal. So what we’re saying is that if we really accept the idea of a universal code against which everyone’s behaviour measures up, the person in charge of that code can’t be me. It can’t be you. It can’t even be human – or humanity itself – because humanity is subject to it whether it likes it or not. We can’t rebel against this law and change it by doing so – it remains intact no matter how frequently we break it. So if we’re not in charge then we’ve got to realise that there’s something, or someone, who’s bigger than us in charge of this universal code.

Now, we still haven’t yet set foot on the shores of Christianity, but a universal moral code needs to be instituted. We can’t expect moral law to evolve from the physical laws of the universe, because moral law is something we feel internally, whereas physical laws are something we merely observe through repeated practice. What remains then, is the possibility that someone – rather than some detached thing – has decided what’s good and bad. This someone has to be bigger than us and in charge of us in a way that’s a bit beyond imagination, because the imposition of this law is something that we simply cannot avoid no matter how hard we try. The sinister Santa might seem frightening, but our inner sense of the moral law is based on something much more strongly motivating than fear. What we’re rubbing up against is someone who has actually built a sense of right and wrong into us. To do that, this someone has had to define

what right and wrong is. Anyone with that kind of power is certainly bigger than I am. No matter how well I argue, there’ll be plenty of people who disagree with me, so I couldn’t possibly institute this moral code. Not only is the idea of someone bigger than me the only way to explain the presence of this moral code to which the majority of humanity feels bound, it actually gives me somewhere to place these values. Until this point, we’ve discussed a rather vague idea of a moral law without considering where it’s grounded. You see whatever finds its ultimate basis in me might be deemed completely irrelevant for you, but when we find that something is relevant for both of us that can either be coincidence or a fact that has its basis in something outside of us – like the moon. I can see it, and you can see it. We’re either both subject to the same hallucination or we’re seeing something that’s outside of us. Now when we find some-

thing that everyone experiences in a very similar way, we need to find a basis for it. With the moon, that’s relatively easy – we believe that it’s there. With the moral law, that’s more difficult. Simply believing that it’s there doesn’t tell us whether its source is personal or impersonal, caring or cold, good or bad. And because we can’t actually get outside of our sense of right and wrong, we can’t even tell whether it is right or wrong. This is why it’s so important that we understand that it comes from a person, not a force. The ultimate ground of this moral code is in the person that instituted it. This means that the moral code tells me about this person because it shows what they value: life, fairness, equality and compassion. Ultimately, they value love. Love is the one thing that’s more important than life. So remember that your conscience isn’t just yours. It’s the work of a much bigger person and it tells you what they care about.

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Funnily enough

The fun-filled life o She topped the Kindle comedy charts with Funnily Enough. But whether you know Sophie Neville or not, we’re sure you’ll love her! Put your feet up and enjoy her unique take on faith, family and fun in this new series…

A

Sophie Neville, the author of Funnily Enough

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pril 9, 1991 Extraordinary weather; blue sky, blue lake, brilliant sunshine – all the daffodils and cherry blossom out at once, and then very suddenly, snow. Not sleet, but great big flakes falling out of a grey sky almost as if the cherry blossom was coming off. It’s a bit like what’s happened to me. I’m ill. Or not ill, I don’t know, but I’m totally exhausted. Enfeebled; like a sea creature stranded on a beach, with the tide receding. Everything was going well until I conked-out at work. I’ve been taken off my series and sent home to my parents’ farm. By the BBC doctor. For an indefinite period. I suppose that when you just can’t move there must be something wrong. My father had to drive up to London and bring me home to Gloucestershire. I sat slumped in the car, shaking and unable to speak, but I’m going to stay here now, in my old bedroom, and get fat and fit and well. I’d better be careful; I think it’s quite easy for stranded sea creatures to start feeling sorry for themselves. I knew an actor who once had a small part playing a sand monster in Doctor Who. His scenes were filmed on Brighton beach in January. “We monsters had to lie under a thin layer of sand, staying still until the director shouted ‘action!’ Then we would emerge and bear down, scarily, on the Doctor and his assistant. “I got quite used to being buried and waiting around for the crew to set up the shot again. After the seventh take the monster found himself lying under the sand for what seemed like hours. I thought I would just take a peek to see what was happening. The entire beach was deserted. It had started to drizzle.


e of Sophie Neville

The crew must have moved on to the next location. I felt so stupid. I didn’t have any money on me and had to walk back through Brighton to the unit hotel, all cold and stiff in the soggy sand monster costume, trying not to frighten old ladies or children in pushchairs.” April 11 I have the concentration of a five-year-old and can’t do a thing. This is my symptom. It’s no good; I’m meant to be working. My throat is on fire. Perhaps I should have done a bunk and stayed in South Africa after all. It wouldn’t be cold there, it would be sunny and I wouldn’t be ill. I’d be riding across the plains with the wind in my hair and wild

animals all around me. Apparently I have I collapsed after the first day of filming. a syndrome: post-viral fatigue. Yuppie ’flu, Very embarrassing. of all things. The doctor at work took a long time examining me. April 13 “How long did you have to prepare for Must focus on getting better. It’s quite this drama series of yours?” busy here. I’ve been living in London for “Three weeks, but I caught ’flu so it so long that I didn’t realise what my family ended up being less.” was up to. Atalanta Blue has come to stay. “And how long do you normally need?” She’s my niece, aged one, and has arrived “Oh, three months. But I only finished with an extensive wardrobe of babyediting the last series in February and grows. My incredibly efficient sister, Perry, couldn’t start any earlier.” has left instructions: pinned to the man“Why didn’t you take some leave, Sotelpiece is a schedule of what Atalanta has phie?” he asked. to do and when. “I did, I took two and a half weeks’ holi7am: Wakes day and went to South Africa.” 8am: Eats “I’m surprised you came back.” 10.30am: Sleeps “I had to.” 12.30pm: Eats “So you got off the plane at 6am and 2.30pm: Sleeps walked straight into a meeting.” 5.00pm: Eats “How did you know?” 5.30pm: Bath “Yes, well you have to be pretty fit to 6.00pm: Plays do your job.” He became very strict. “You 7.00pm: Sleeps can’t attempt to do it when you’re in this What a life. Perry has gone to make an shape. I don’t want you to return to work advert for British Gas, her blonde hair unless you can look me in the eye and say bobbed, her pink suit pressed. She left in you’ve been playing tennis every day for a furious temper because she slept the ten days. End of story. Keep a diary of how night in Mary-Dieu’s old bedroom. The you feel, even if you only write five words smoke alarm kept going off every halfa day, and take a list of symptoms to your hour like an alarm clock. It was indicating GP.” that the batteries were running down. It’s a bit of a shock. And a real nuisance. Poor Perry. She didn’t know this, I went down with something vile for two couldn’t find what it was and ended up endless weeks in January, then I’d been ill sleeping in dad’s study, as there’s a bed with a similar virus for ten days over Eastthere. Only she was unable to sleep due er. It could have been to my coughing. To a bug I caught on the ‘I should have done make extra space, dad’s aeroplane flying back the bed on top of a a bunk and stayed put from Johannesburg. chest of drawers, which My family doctor gave means that anyone in South Africa’ me antibiotics, which sleeping on it is rather had made me feel so much better that close to the ceiling and my bed’s on the I’d returned to work as soon as I could. floor above. Does this sound mad? I couldn’t not. We had rehearsals, I had scripts to prepare, and we had meetings, ● Bed-bound by suspected Chronic fatigue lots of them, and there were numerous syndrome, Sophie Neville’s account of how locations to find. being torn from the world of TV production In effect, I didn’t say ‘cut’ early enough. forced her to take stock of her life is a funny, I’m always forgetting to say ‘cut’ and then poignant and uplifting record of her spirstand around wondering why the actors itual journey. If you like what you’ve read, continue to walk down the street. This make sure you get your copy. Plus, don’t time I should have stopped myself sooner. miss more in this series, only in iBelieve. iBelieve

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iReviews

Snuggle up for Vale n DVDs Valentine’s Day is the perfect day to snuggle up with a tearjerker of a movie and we’ve got a couple of classics that will guarantee you get emotional this year! PS I Love You Death isn’t the topic of choice in your average chick flick, but then your average chick flick tends to be funny or sad – not both all at the same time! When Gerry dies leaving Holly all alone, what seems like the bitterest of endings turns out to be the beginning of an uplifting, if emotional, journey to wholeness. If drowning in a sea of emotion is your idea of a good time, then this film is for you! If it’s not your thing, then prepare to be converted – PS I Love You is just that good! The Notebook The Notebook is the mother of all rom-coms. What makes this movie so special is its depiction of a timeless love story that stays as strong through the trials of old age as it does the fervent passions of youth. The Notebook is an imaginative portrayal of true love that will touch your heart and inspire you. It’s got a great cast and the believability of the acting is superb. If you’ve never seen The Notebook then you’re missing out on a classic. Now’s the time to plug that gap and treat your loved one to an unforgettable experience. Books If you’ve ever wondered what it might really mean to truly act on some of the

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more challenging advice we find in Scripture then you’ll love our collection of books. Hopefully you’ll love your neighbour too, once you’ve read them! Why Did Jesus, Moses, The Buddha And Mohammed Cross The Road? Brian McLaren £12.99 Winning the award for the shortest possible book name, Brian McLaren’s mouthful of a title is an apt precursor to a book that might take you a little while to get your head around. The thoughtful and provocative – though gentle – style of this renowned thinker will prod your own mind into gear as he considers the problem of trying to love people across faith boundaries. As inspiring as it is insightful, this book might challenge some of your preconceptions, but there’s a good chance you’ll come out of it a bigger person.

The Great Omission Dallas Willard £9.99 Known for his depth of thought and incredibly practical approach to spirituality, Dallas Willard’s focus on making disciples has had a wide impact on the Church at large. In this series of shorter articles collected together and arranged thematically, he explains


e ntine’s tearjerkers the impact that becoming a disciple should have on the life of a believer and the lives of those around them. This is a really accessible but challenging read. Jesus Wants To Save Christians Rob Bell £8.99 Although this book comes with a dose of controversy attached – as you can see from the title – it really does have something interesting to say. Even if you’re not convinced by the

overarching claims about what the Bible has to say about the economy, there’s some practical points to take out for everyone. What’s more, Rob Bell writes really easy-to-read books. This one’s worth a look just for the sake of interest! CDs Check out some of our favourite artists who are a little off the beaten path. If you’re after some inspiration you could do a lot worse than pick up one of these albums and give them a try!

Burning Lights Chris Tomlin £12.99 Everyone’s favourite worship leader returns with a brand new album packed to the rafters with crowd pleasing choruses guaranteed to be sung in a church near you before long. Featuring the squeaky clean musicianship and production that has become a staple of mainstream worship albums, Chris’ vocals make this a very appealing offering that will fit nicely into the repertoire of worship leaders around the nation. Collaboration with rapper Lecrae keeps things fresh, and there’s plenty to be pleased about with this latest effort. God My Rock Brenton Brown £10.99 Brenton Brown is the South African worship leader taking the world by storm with songs that show a straightforward approach to faith. God My Rock is his live album that captures the energy of his well-known tunes such as ‘Our God Is Mercy’ for the very first time. Featuring tweaked arrangements and an enthusiastic crowd, God My Rock is a very engageable release from a brilliant artist. StompTown Revival £9.99 If you want to hear a harmonica weep then this is the album for you! Technically, it’s a short EP, but you won’t be too bothered about technicalities when you hear the excellent mouth-harp work and folky stylings of this great self-titled debut release from StompTown Revival. For a band made up of two people, it’s a pretty impressive endeavour that will restore your faith in Christian singer-songwriters.

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puzzles sudoku

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Place the numbers 1 - 9 in every row, column and 3x3 box Easy

Crack the code to fill in the crossword grid. Each letter of the alphabet appears at least once in the grid and is represented by the same number wherever it appears. A number of letters have been decoded to get you started 18 18 8 22

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Red carpet

TESTIMONY

The perfect role model

It’s no secret why committed Christian Kylie Bisutti left her career as an underwear model

K

ylie Bisutti is the model example. The 22-year-old beauty quit her job at underwear store Victoria’s Secret because it clashed with her Christian faith. Bisutti won a TV model search in 2009 which was carried out in front of millions of Americans by the lingerie firm. But she has since left and now travels throughout the USA speaking at churches about her faith. She says, “Victoria’s Secret was my absolutely biggest goal in life, and it was all I ever wanted career-wise. I actually loved it while I was there, it was so much fun and I had a blast. “But the more I was modelling lingerie, and lingerie isn’t clothing, I just started becoming more uncomfortable with it because of my faith. I’m a Christian, and reading the Bible more, I was becoming more convicted about it. “I just became so convicted of honouring the Lord and my body and wanting to be a role model for other women out there who look up to me.” The Californian says that in the wake of baring her body as an angel, she was also hosting parties, posing for men’s magazines, and craving more and more attention. But she was not feeling good about herself. “My body should only be for my husband and it’s just a sacred thing,” adds Bisutti, who married just before winning the modelling competition. “I didn’t really want to be that kind of role model for younger girls because I had a lot of younger Christian girls that were

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looking up to me and then thinking that it was OK for them to walk around and show their bodies in lingerie to guys. “It was pretty crazy because I finally achieved my biggest dream, the dream that I always wanted, but when I finally got it, it wasn’t all that I thought it would be – especially being married, I just wanted to keep my marriage sacred.” Bisutti reveals that a conversation with her eight-year-old cousin helped motivate her to make this decision. “I was doing my make-up in the mirror one day and she was watching me,” Bisutti explains. “She looked at me and was like, ‘You know, I think I want to stop eating so I can look like you.’ “It just broke my heart because she looks up to me and I didn’t want to be that type of person that she thought she had to do that to be beautiful,” she says. “My goal is just to be a better role model for the youth, I just want them to see me as somebody that they can look up to and somebody that’s going to be dressing appropriately,” she adds. “I want to go over the top about this because I don’t think enough people go over the top about how serious all this is. I just want people to see something different about me because I have that Christian faith and I think it’s so important for everyone to have.” Bisutti said that while she’s left Victoria’s Secret, she’s not done with modelling completely. “I’m definitely going to pursue modelling,” she explains. “I just want to be more wholesome and always want to honour the Lord.”

Kylie Bisutti wants to be a good role model for young people


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A DARK PLACE THEN I FOUND THE LIGHT... SAVED HIM

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cele celeWales is Party in faith based the first THE Christian elected. brating becoming have a mayor 47, started party to Jeff Green, CouncillorAugust in Llandrindod in his term ac ac“I’ve been Wells. New Life: of the town He told people by the cepted biblical fantastic. which is to reintroduce before the “I want like prayers I believe we principles, meetings. so that town council people in place right have the house happen.” a guest this can away also runs Jeff, who Sue, doesn’t shy Christian wife, with his about his from talking beliefs. BENEFITS I’m a born that everyone “It’s a major “I’ll tell he said. again Christian,” identity. of prayer part of my and the benefits “I’ve seen and my businessknow life and in my own Bible says what the this town. I believe work in we will see that it can we exalt Christ, cannot that we “When changes miraculous ourselves. raise orchestrate that Christians public “It’s time all spheres of in know to what we their head of proclaim touch the lives life and so we can be truth us.” around all those

A CHRISTMAS comedy is set to be a big hit at the cinemas this month. Nativity 2: Danger In The Manger was launched at the end of November. It is a sequel to Nativity, which was a surprise box office smash when it was released in 2009 by Debbie Isitt. Debbie recently attended the Christian Resources Exhi-

WITH HOW I COPED TRAGEDY 2 DOUBLE SEE PAGE

bition in Manchester to discuss the new movie, which tells the story of a young teacher, his pregnant wife and a group of school children. The film stars Dr Who star David Tennant with Gavin and Stacey’s Joanna Page, and includes comedy actor Marc Wootton, Jessica Hynes and Pam Ferris.

Debbie said: “I am inspired by religious settings and stories because they form part of the fabric of my everyday life. I have been influenced by many stories from the Bible. I hope church and community groups respond to the film’s positive message of peace and reconciliation between family members.”

STAR SWAPS STAGE FOR CAROLS

GOSPEL TO ROCK CLUB

Choir all set to sing carols at top London nightspot SEE PAGE 2

PLAN TO MOVE

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ESCAPED... Chris Hyde with his wife Kris

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LEAVES DANNY BUOYED CAROL SINGER... Daniel O’Donnell will enjoy Christmas at his home church

IRISH singing star Daniel O’Donnell will swap arenas for a small church this Christmas. The superstar, who packs out huge venues across the world, will belt out a few carols at his home church in Kincas-

by Becky Barlow

slagh, County Donegal on Christmas Eve.

Daniel, who has sold more than ten million albums during a glittering

career, told New Life: “As ● Continued on Page 3

YEAR

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a Chris Hyde’s speeding down while ity began on his motorbike. a huge mountain zoomed towards had his brakes his As Chris from discovered drop, he was ready to leap from failed and bike. saved him let go and that had out-of-control he couldn’t it was God up, But he foundvision. changed,” of certain death.everything was the face round, came had a strange straight bike swung “For me, “What happened went was just “I remembered Then the impossibly stopped He said: met in Tahoe. It The bike and ran and is he explained. had slowed impossible. physics says a guy we him, nothing more.and his waste ground or attempt utterly that into the any slide any doctor a flash of 3 ‘God without a local in a direction gravel, or on Page upright “He was us had been, the loose from Even● Continued words to to dig into me.” Chris, 61, that parting believes over atyou.’ input from Durham, the bike was gogo with wood, County but it “I was leaning the corner out of control. tempting was fast and ing too

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Relax and refresh in restful Rutland

FEBRUARY 2013

TANGO GIVES PAWS FOR THOUGHT!

Issue 228

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DANIEL O’DONNELL:

SEE PAGE 3

MY BELIEFS HAVE KEPT MY FEET ON THE GROUND

SEE FITNESS GURU CENTRE ROSEMARY CONLEY PAGES REVEALS THE SECRET BEHIND HER SUCCESS... PAGE 3

Queen’s DOC AMAZED BY CURE AFTER focus on VIGIL her faith

HEALED... Gina Hunt

The Queen encouraged people to follow Jesus’ example

BR I TA I N’S best eva nge l i st, He Majesty The Queen, r again used her Christmas Day speech to proclaim her Christian faith. Addressing the nation during Christmas Day her TV Majesty encouraged broadcast, Her Brits to follow the example of Jesus in their lives. She said: “I am always struck how the spirit by of also at the heart togetherness lies of the Christmas story.

“A young mother and a dutiful father with their baby were joined by poor shepherds a nd v isitors from afar. “They came with their gifts to worship the Christ child. From that day on he has inspired people commit themselves to to the best interests of others.

A WOMAN who suffered from an extremely rare by Ian White form of cancer believes God healed her after a prayer vigil months, medics was held across the globe. told her she had surprisingly been ‘cured’. Gina Hunt , 51, Gina told New had been diagnosed with hormone levels Life that her Gestational Trophoblastic proved, which suddenly imDisease, a condiwasn’t medition where tumours cally possible as she hadn’t had grow inside the uterus. enough chemotherapy. She said: “We ly believe what could hardwe were told and my bewildered consultant couldn’t explain it himself! LUNGS “For a consultant to talk of being cured, he would have to be sure. When diagnosed, I’d told him I was a that I knew he Christian and would do his best and the rest was up to God. The consultant is now using ● Continued on Page 3

SERVE

“We remember only son ‘to serve, that God sent his He restored love not to be served’. and service to centre of our lives in the personthe Jesus Christ. of “It is my prayer this Christmas Day that his example and teaching will continue to bring people gether to give tothe best of themselves in the service of others.”

There have been cases of the disease jus t 7 7 in the last 20 years. in Britain

MY NEW LEASE OF LIFE AFTER GOING BLIND FULL STORY...

Gina was told by doctors that the cancer had spread to her lungs and the lining of her brain. She began chemotherapy treatment but after just a few

PAGE 2

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a man’s w rld with Carl Beech

Just grit your teeth and get on with it! The General Director of Christian Vision for Men shares his thoughts about what life has to throw at us

I

’m not going to cut a long story short. In fact, it’s going to last about 700 words. A few months ago I was working away and staying in the same hotel for a couple of nights. On the first morning that I got up, I stumbled into the shower, clicking on the kettle on the way past. I turned on the bathroom light, looked in the mirror and saw that I was absolutely covered in flea bites. This prompted a similar reaction in me to that of Lord Uxbridge who noticed that his leg had been blown off at the Battle of Waterloo while sitting on a horse next to Wellington: “By Jove, they’ve got my leg!” Being a bloke, I didn’t connect the fact that I had a splitting headache and felt unusually tired. It was, after all, the morning! To get to the heart of the matter, the flea bites stayed there for about two weeks, when they then disappeared. This was a momentary relief until they reappeared again while I was away in America. After two or three of these episodes, I came to the conclusion that this was not a case of fleas following me around the world and mugging me when I was least expecting it. So, I did the totally unexpected and out-of-character thing… I made an appointment with the GP. This was a new(ish) experience for me. I’ve only been to see a doctor a few times

58

iBelieve

over the years – a fact which might lead you to the conclusion that I must have been feeling rather poorly. Unfortunately for me, the doctor didn’t draw the same conclusion and without really even looking up from his pad, he told me to go away and get on with life and that it was just one of those things. Going back home and having to admit that I was just over-reacting to a clear case of man flu wasn’t one of my finest moments. Not even a single pill to prove that I was fully and properly ill! Thankfully however, the symptoms returned and so off I popped (being a stubborn sort of bloke, fuelled by the fact I felt terrible) for a second opinion. Funnily enough, this visit got a very different reaction. Several needles and a urine test later, I found out that I was actually on the receiving end of a very nasty post bacterial thing that, without getting overly technical, was affecting my kidneys. You should have seen the look on my face when finally I went home with penicillin and proof that, for what was now nearly three months, I was clearly unwell – although I didn’t get much sympathy from anywhere! For example, when I told the team I work with, one of them asked, with a completely straight face, if they could have my iPad if I didn’t ‘pull through’. My family wanted to know if I was still able to walk the dog. And so I reverted back to doctor number one’s policy, who obviously had insight and wisdom… I just got on with life. You will, of course, all be pleased to know that I’m slowly but surely on the mend now – but that really is a side issue. A couple of thoughts went through my mind over the three months. I realised that sometimes you do just have to crack

on. Sometimes life doesn’t work out the way you think it should and sometimes you can feel pretty rough, emotionally and/or physically. It can be tempting to hide under the duvet in times like that. Sure, we need to rest but sometimes we also have to grit our teeth and crack on. Unless you really are unable to, I recommend the latter as a mindset (taking sensible rest along the way of course). Secondly, things were put into perspective when one of my good mates was diagnosed with cancer in his early 30s. I can see him viewing life with a very different clarity and appreciation. That’s made me stop wallowing in man-style self pity. Keep looking up!

Sometimes you’ve just got to get up and crack on, says Carl Beech


SUBSCRIBE TODAY JANUARY â&#x20AC;&#x201C; MARCH 2013

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