naps stories 09

naps stories – 09 “Sincere thanks to all those unknowns who wrote these articles and to those who forwarded to the rest of the mankind�

Compiled & Prepared by A.Narayana Prasad., narayanaprasad_a@yahoo.com

1

Contents 01. ARTICLE BY GV DASARATHI 03 02. Cockpit to Box Office

08

03. Laughit!

10

04. Business has changed

11

05. Worst Words to Say at Work 15

2

Stock Exchange!

This when I was born 46 years ago.

I was born to Tamil speaking parents, my father had a dark skin and my mother a light one. My ayah was a lightskinned woman from UP who spoke Hindi. We lived in a thickly forested area in Jharkhand, where the majority of the population was dark-skinned tribal people who spoke a language called Ho. On my trips out of home I saw people wearing all kinds of attire -- from sadhus wearing nothing at all, to the locals who went topless, to women in burqas.

Most of the guests in our home spoke English. We were Hindu, my ayah was Muslim, and the tribals were either Christian or Animists who worshiped trees, animals or the spirits of their forefathers. People around me had all kinds of food habits. Some ate only vegetables, some did not eat cattle, some did not eat pigs, some ate anything including rats and monitor lizards.

Thanks to Internet 3

Our small mining community celebrated festivals of all religions with equal gusto. We lived in the middle of an almost virgin forest that was home to a huge variety of wild animals that included elephants, bears and deer. The animals added to the fun and the unpredictability of life by occasionally walking into our tiny community of 10 houses (sometimes into them).

This was my small introduction to the enormous diversity of this wonderful land. Even as an infant I was listening to people of different colours and facial features speaking four languages, of four religions, dressing in different ways, and eating a variety of food.

These must have been the lessons that I learned: anyone looking like a human was a human, irrespective of skin colour or features; humans worshiped all sorts of gods, wore all sorts of clothing, ate all kinds of food, and spoke all kinds of languages.

Thanks to Internet

4

As I grew up, my father's company transferred him every two or three years through about half the states in India. I saw the rest of India. I learned that Indians believe in far more gods than the four that I was introduced to as an infant. I learned that each state has three or four different regions.

People in each of these regions speak different languages or dialects and may not even understand the other dialects in their own state. Each region eats a different kind of food, wears different clothing, is culturally very different, and looks very different geographically.

Today, nobody can convince me that I am superior to someone else because of my religion, skin colour or language. The diversity that I experienced, accepted and enjoyed as an infant is not unique to me.

Every Indian experiences this -- only the details differ. I believe that this is what makes us the most tolerant country in the world. I enjoy our diversity so much that I cannot even think of living in one of those countries where everything is homogeneous -- everybody looks the same, eat the same food, and believe in Thanks to Internet 5

the same religion. Think of countries like the Netherlands, Germany, Japan, and Sweden... hundreds of them.

Yes, the diversity occasionally makes us kill each other, usually over different religions or sub-religions. This is tragic and should never happen, but look at it this way: Sunnis, Buddhists, Roman Catholics, Sikhs, Bohras, Digambar Jains, Parsis, Khurmis, Iyers, Agarwals, Nairs, Syrian Christians, Shias, Shwetambar Jains, Jews, Ismailis, Seventh Day Adventists, Bishnois and a whole lot of other groups live together in India.

In Britain and Yemen two sects of the same religion were killing each other for decades. In Lebanon, people from two religions have been killing each other.

The US and South Africa have seen huge problems over two skin colours. In Canada it's over two languages.

As an Indian, I laugh at these silly reasons for their conflicts -- two religions, two colours, two languages. I feel like saying "Hey guys, try Digamber Jain, Gujarati-speaking, pyjama-kurtaThanks to Internet 6

wearing herbivore co-existing with Syrian Christian, Malayalam-speaking, munduwearing carnivore". Where would we be if we had been as intolerant as them?

I believe that the religious intolerance that we are seeing now is confined to a small percentage of us, and that in the long run we have the sense to not take our differences too seriously, to acknowledge that the whole lot of us are a wonderful amalgam of different races, religions and cultures.

I can never be a global citizen.

Contrary to the advice that any stockbroker would give, I've invested all my emotional stocks in this company called India, because I'm sure that the value of these stocks can only go up. Not because of the amount of steel, armaments and textiles we can make, but because we know how to live together.

Thanks to Internet

7

Cockpit to Box Office While the C-5 was turning over its engines, a female crewman gave the G.I.s on board the usual information regarding seat belts, emergency exits, etc.

Finally, she said, 'now sit back and enjoy your trip while your captain, Judith Campbell, and crew take you safely to Afghanistan’ An old MSgt. sitting in the eighth row thought to himself, 'Did I hear her right?

Is the captain a woman? ' When the attendant came by he said 'Did I understand you right? Is the captain a woman?'

'Yes,'! said the attendant, 'In fact, this entire crew is female.'

'My God,' he said, 'I wish I had two double scotch and sodas. I don't know what to think with only women up there in the cockpit.'

Thanks to Internet 8

'That's another thing, Sergeant,' said the crew member, 'We No Longer Call It the Cockpit'

'It's the Box Office.'

'Whatever you give a woman, she will make greater.

If you give her sperm, she'll give you a baby. If you give her a house, she'll give you a home. If you give her groceries, she'll give you a meal. If you give her a smile, she'll give you her heart. She multiplies and enlarges what is given to her.

So, if you give her any crap, be ready to receive a ton of shit.'

Thanks to Internet

9

Laughit!

A man and his wife went on vacation to Jerusalem. While they were there, the wife passed away. The undertaker told the husband, "You can have her shipped home for $5,000, or you can bury her here, in the Holy Land, for $150."

The man thought about it and told him he would just have her shipped home.

The undertaker asked, "Why would you spend $5,000 to ship your wife home, when it would be wonderful to be buried here and you would spend only $150?"

The man replied, "Long ago a man called Jesus Christ died here, was buried here, and three days later he rose from the dead. I just can't take that chance.

Thanks to Internet

10

Business has changed Change is business in this new world.

A world of dramatic globalization. A world shaped by a communication revolution with zero end in sight. A world where 9-5 has been overshadowed by 24/7-365. A world where technology has given the 17year-old next door the leverage to create some serious heat in your industry.

This new world relentlessly delivers change. The market space is now raw excitement. It's also made business and life itself very unpredictable. Change is the new reality. Understanding the reality doesn't necessarily make going through change any easier. When change is rocking my world, I turn to The Group of 7. The 7 Change Management Skills that will give you navigation, grounding, as well as open some awesome opportunities

Thanks to Internet

11

The Group of 7 1. Be in the Business of Developing Leaders The only way any organization - and any human being, for that matter - can win in the ring with change, is to start developing leadership capacity in everyone. This is the single most important business discipline required to overcome change. An organization is the sum of its parts - all people in all roles. If a leader hasn't invested in developing the people, or has turned a neglectful eye on the importance of all the parts, the sum of that organization will unfortunately be less than zero.

An organization who develops the leader in everyone will not only adapt beautifully to the changing conditions, it will actually lead within its field.

2. Be So Good They Can't Ignore You Great words of wisdom from Actor Steve Martin. Be so good they can't ignore you. No matter what your craft is, or your industry, or your position, Thanks to Internet 12

become so good at it, you'll make it impossible to go unnoticed. Committing yourself to mastery at what you do, is the only standard to hold yourself to in times of change. Anything less and you'll be left behind. So shift from victim to virtuoso.

3. Change Consulting

Provides

Free

Business

Intelligent enterprises understand that hard business conditions deliver free consulting advice. During intense times, you have the chance to discover your weaknesses and become aware of your constraints. During times of change or chaos you have the opportunity to line things up and square things off that you might under normal circumstances neglect. The upside of change is it provides positive pressure to make you pivot and become even more efficient, effective, and profitable. "Sometimes knowing your weaknesses can be your greatest strength." Howard Schultz

Thanks to Internet

13

4. Refuse to Major in the Minors The best leaders stay staggeringly focused on the biggest To Dos. They have the fiery resolve to have an almost military like concentration on their best opportunities and refuse to be sidetracked by anything else. Find the inner discipline to stick to the majors and say "no" to the minors.

5. Take a Step against Stagnation Take a step ahead - even if you're not quite sure where you are going. There is no perfect choice in business or in life.

All we can do is make the best choice when action is necessary. Forward movement has power. It will advance your life in one way or another. Doing nothing in the face of change, on the other hand, is the worst thing you can do.

Doing nothing is the beginning of the end.

Thanks to Internet

14

6. Change has an Outstanding ROI While others resist change, refusing to grow with it, embrace it and use it to your advantage. Leverage it to promote your leadership abilities. Exploit it to build a stronger business. Capitalize on it and maximize its return. According to bestselling authors and management consultants Hammer and Champy "70% of business reengineering projects [aka changes] fail." In times of change, many businesses fall off course or drop out of the race entirely. Your best business opportunity is to become part of the 30% who actually win at change and advance simply because others can't stomach the course.

7. Regain your Stride by Managing Processes Rosabeth Moss Kanter a professor at Harvard Business School, suggests the importance of establishing "certainty of process when there can't be certainty about decisions." Harvard Business Review. Even though you don't know details, decision or future outcomes, you can be certain about setting your Thanks to Internet 15

priorities, goals, and action items such as scheduling meetings with key players.

Reground yourself by managing the processes surrounding change.

Thanks to Internet

16

Worst Words to Say at Work Let's look at some specific words and phrases that are used by some people to buy time, avoid giving answers and escape commitment. If you use these words and phrases yourself, take a scalpel and cut them out of your thinking, speaking and writing.

Words like these only weaken you and make you sound noncommittal, undependable and untrustworthy.

"Try" Try is a weasel word. "Well, I'll try," some people say. It's a cop-out. They're just giving you lip service when they probably have no real intention of doing what you ask.

Remember what Yoda says to Luke Skywalker in Star Wars: "Do or do not--there is no try."

Take Yoda's advice. Give it your all when you attempt something. And if it doesn't work, start over.

Put passion into your work and give it your best effort, so you can know that you did all you could to make it happen. So if the outcome you were expecting didn't come to fruition, it's not because you didn't do everything you could to make it happen. It just wasn't the right time for it or it wasn't meant to be.

Thanks to Internet

17

"Whatever" This word is a trusted favourite of people who want to dismiss you, diminish what you say or get rid of you quickly.

"Whatever," they will say as an all-purpose response to your earnest request. It's an insult and a verbal slap in the face. It's a way to respond to a person without actually responding. When you say whatever after another person has said his or her piece, you have essentially put up a wall between the two of you and halted any progress in communicating. It's a word to avoid.

"Maybe" and "I don't know" People will sometimes avoid making a decision and hide behind words and phrases like "maybe" and "I don't know." There's a difference between legitimately not knowing something and using words like these as excuses. Sometimes during a confrontation people will claim not to know something or offer the noncommittal response "maybe," just to avoid being put on the spot. If that seems to be the case, ask, "When do you think you will know?" or "How can you find out?" Don't let the person off the hook so easily.

"I'll get back to you" When people need to buy time or avoid revealing a project's status, they will say, "I'll get back to you," and they usually never do. If people say they will get back to you, always clarify. Ask them when Thanks to Internet

18

they will get back to you, and make sure they specify the day and time. If they don't, then pin them down to a day and time and hold them to it. If they won't give you a day or time, tell them you'll call in a day or week and follow up. Make sure you call and get the information you need.

"If" Projects depend on everyone doing his or her part. People who use if are usually playing the blame game and betting against themselves. They like to set conditions, rather than assuming a successful outcome. People who rely on conditional responses are fortifying themselves against potential failure.

They will say, "If Bob finishes his part, then I can do my part." They're laying Thanks the to Internet groundwork for a "no fault" excuse and for not finishing their work.

There are always alternatives, other routes and ways to get the job done. Excuse makers usually have the energy of a slug, the vision of Mr. Magoo and the spine of a jellyfish. You don't want them on your mountain climbing team up K-2 or Mount Everest.

"Yes, but ..." This is another excuse. You might give your team members suggestions or solutions and they come back to you with "Yes, but . . ." as a response. They don't really want answers, help, or solutions. You need to call the "Yes, but . . ." people out on their avoidance tactic by saying something like: "You know, Jackie, every time I offer you a 19

Thanks to Internet

suggestion you say, 'Yes, but . . . ,' which makes me think you don't really want to solve this problem. That's not going to work. If you want to play the victim, go right ahead, but I'm not going to allow you to keep this up and I may have to report you." After a response like that, you can be assured that the next words you hear will not be, "Yes, but . . ."!

"I guess ..." This is usually said in a weak, soft-spoken, shoulder-shrugging manner. It's another attempt to shirk responsibility--a phrase is only muttered when people half agree with you, but want to leave enough leeway to say, "Well, I didn't really know. . . . I was only guessing." If you use this phrase, cut it out of your vocabulary.

"We'll see ..."

How many times did we hear our parents say this? We knew they were buying time, avoiding a fight or confrontation or really saying no. It's better to be decisive and honest by saying, "I need more information. Please present your case or send me the data--both pro and con--so I can make an informed decision." That way the interested parties will contribute to an in-depth, well-researched "verdict."

Thanks to Internet

20