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Wednesday • March 15 • 2017 From The Publisher
Glasses Same or Next Day Glasses & Contacts Eye Exams Walk-ins & Outside Rx Welcome
A Day Without Men ARLO KALLEMEYN
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Free pair includes scratch resistant plastic (CR39) single vision or line-bifocal (FT28) lenses and fashion frame from specially tagged selection. Promotion cannot be combined with any other discounts, insurances or previous purchases.
These days it’s a popular pastime to imagine life without a certain segment of the population. I know some people who say that a day without dogs and cats would leave a huge hole in their lives. Sure, living a day without our f urr y friends would be tough to get through, but how about liv ing a day w it hout a not her v er y super important part of our lives. Imagine for a moment a ‘Day Without Men’. Now I agree that a day without men would make it much easier for anyone driving on our highways. A fter a ll, w ithout men, who wou ld use t he shou lder a s a pa ssi ng la ne ? The shou lder would be completely free and unobstructed – just the way it was intended. That’s a waste of good pavement in the minds of quite a few men that I k now. Si nc e we a re spea k i ng of d r iv i ng sk ills – let’s ta lk about red lig ht ca meras. For some reason that yellow light sure looks green to a lot of us guys. Without men, the red-light camera industry would go out of business. Ticket revenue would dry up and instead of multiplying like rabbits, those annoying cameras wou ld be a d ista nt memory – just like 8 track tapes. I had trouble thinking of more examples of what a ‘Day Without Men’ would look like, but my daughter came to the rescue. She didn’t have any problem rattling off several – right off the top of her head. She reminded me that without
men, there would never be an empty toilet paper roll sitting politely in the bathroom – just waiting for t he nex t person to d i s c ov er. O r t her e wou ld n’t be a n empt y milk carton sitting in the fridge, after the man of the house drank out of it to save the work of putting his glass in the sink. You never k now – someone may just need a teaspoon of milk, and there it will be – nice and cold too. In my opin ion a day w it hout men would be so utterly boring. After a l l , w h o w ou l d of f e r random tidbits of trivia a nd unsolicited adv ice in t he course of polite conversation? Who would dominate conversation at the water cooler with statistics of their favorite sports team. Even better – their fantasy team. For those who don’t know – fantasy sports teams don’t even really exist but still need plenty of research and in-depth analytical skills. Spea k i ng of sk i l ls. Steve Harvey the brilliant game show host and TV persona l it y once sa id, ‘My k ids told me t hat I don’t have a ny sk i l ls like a doctor, law yer or accountant. I told them if they wanted to see one of my skills just look in the refrigerator!” I hope you enjoyed this c olu m n a nd t h i n k i ng about what a ‘Day Without Men’ would look like. Arlo Kallemeyn Shopper Publisher a nd big fan of appreciating the people in our lives.
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